1 00:00:10,622 --> 00:00:13,342 Speaker 1: You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast. 2 00:00:13,822 --> 00:00:17,182 Speaker 2: Mamma Mia acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters 3 00:00:17,222 --> 00:00:22,221 Speaker 2: that this podcast is recorded on Hello and welcome to 4 00:00:22,262 --> 00:00:24,782 Speaker 2: Mamma Mia. Out loud. It's what women are actually talking 5 00:00:24,782 --> 00:00:28,062 Speaker 2: about on Friday, the fifth of September. I'm Holly Wayne Wright, 6 00:00:28,101 --> 00:00:30,342 Speaker 2: and I'm remembering that we used to always say to 7 00:00:30,342 --> 00:00:32,902 Speaker 2: our out louders on a Friday, this is your place 8 00:00:33,101 --> 00:00:35,102 Speaker 2: on Friday for a bit of relaxation. 9 00:00:35,582 --> 00:00:36,542 Speaker 1: I love it, a. 10 00:00:36,502 --> 00:00:39,782 Speaker 2: Break from anything newsy. This is just a place where 11 00:00:39,781 --> 00:00:42,222 Speaker 2: we do a bit of thinky, a bit of piss takery, 12 00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:45,781 Speaker 2: bit of fun, a bit of yep recos for your weekend. 13 00:00:46,142 --> 00:00:47,942 Speaker 2: So welcome, relax. 14 00:00:48,582 --> 00:00:51,622 Speaker 1: You're wearing a cobalt blue shirt, which is the perfect vibe. 15 00:00:55,742 --> 00:00:57,622 Speaker 1: And I am Jesse Stevens and. 16 00:00:57,702 --> 00:01:01,662 Speaker 2: On today's show, this is what made our agenda. First, 17 00:01:01,742 --> 00:01:05,261 Speaker 2: the Google doc that will instantly divide everyone listening into 18 00:01:05,301 --> 00:01:06,142 Speaker 2: two types of. 19 00:01:06,062 --> 00:01:11,022 Speaker 1: People, plus our love hate relationship with rich people's. 20 00:01:10,301 --> 00:01:14,142 Speaker 3: And your weekly recommendations including a brilliant Netflix drama, a 21 00:01:14,222 --> 00:01:17,862 Speaker 3: strange fitness fad, and something very fancy for your face. 22 00:01:18,422 --> 00:01:23,142 Speaker 3: But first, in case you missed it, headphones are making 23 00:01:23,182 --> 00:01:27,182 Speaker 3: your anxiety worse. How so, specially your noise canceling ones. 24 00:01:27,302 --> 00:01:29,382 Speaker 3: Do either of you use noise canceling headphones? 25 00:01:29,542 --> 00:01:32,622 Speaker 1: Yes, you can pry my air pods playing pink noise 26 00:01:32,662 --> 00:01:33,502 Speaker 1: out of my colder. 27 00:01:33,742 --> 00:01:37,822 Speaker 3: Really okay? So, according to a piece by a woman 28 00:01:37,902 --> 00:01:41,062 Speaker 3: named l Jones on Substack, there is a growing body 29 00:01:41,102 --> 00:01:45,302 Speaker 3: of evidence to suggest that noise canceling headphones are causing 30 00:01:45,742 --> 00:01:49,662 Speaker 3: hearing problems in young people. But also the reliance on 31 00:01:49,742 --> 00:01:52,702 Speaker 3: them is creeping, and she's saying that this is not 32 00:01:52,862 --> 00:01:56,262 Speaker 3: a good thing. So first you use them on the train, 33 00:01:56,302 --> 00:01:58,022 Speaker 3: and then maybe you're at work, you're trying to concentrate, 34 00:01:58,062 --> 00:02:00,342 Speaker 3: you put on your pink noise whatever it is, and 35 00:02:00,422 --> 00:02:02,822 Speaker 3: eventually you've got them in because the hum of the 36 00:02:02,862 --> 00:02:07,382 Speaker 3: refrigerator is irritating you. Important caveat as well for people 37 00:02:07,422 --> 00:02:10,582 Speaker 3: with neurological conditions or who are neu divergent. There's an 38 00:02:10,582 --> 00:02:13,342 Speaker 3: obvious exception, right, for a long time people have needed 39 00:02:13,422 --> 00:02:16,022 Speaker 3: this kind of stuff, but for most they could be 40 00:02:16,102 --> 00:02:20,022 Speaker 3: doing more harm than good. So audiology departments are reporting 41 00:02:20,142 --> 00:02:22,062 Speaker 3: that more and more young people are coming in to 42 00:02:22,102 --> 00:02:25,102 Speaker 3: get their hearing checked, and when they do check the hearing, 43 00:02:25,181 --> 00:02:27,542 Speaker 3: they say it's not an issue with your hearing, but 44 00:02:27,582 --> 00:02:30,542 Speaker 3: with your listening, so the part of your brains. 45 00:02:31,181 --> 00:02:34,142 Speaker 2: All children have that problem, the listening problem. It's just 46 00:02:34,462 --> 00:02:35,942 Speaker 2: that they can't hear you when you tell them to 47 00:02:35,982 --> 00:02:37,022 Speaker 2: do things they don't want to do. 48 00:02:37,222 --> 00:02:40,862 Speaker 3: Yes, well, apparently the headphones are making it worse. So 49 00:02:41,222 --> 00:02:43,702 Speaker 3: it's the processing of the sound. They're not doing it 50 00:02:43,742 --> 00:02:47,302 Speaker 3: as much. Filtering out noise from the car alarm to 51 00:02:47,342 --> 00:02:50,742 Speaker 3: the barking dog is a skill that strengthens with practice, 52 00:02:50,862 --> 00:02:53,262 Speaker 3: which we have evolved to be able to do. And 53 00:02:53,342 --> 00:02:55,942 Speaker 3: if you start to control for all of that, then 54 00:02:55,942 --> 00:02:58,942 Speaker 3: when you are confronted with an unexpected noise like a 55 00:02:58,982 --> 00:03:03,061 Speaker 3: door slamming, that leads to really high levels of anxiety. 56 00:03:03,702 --> 00:03:06,422 Speaker 3: The suggestion is that we go back to wide headphones, 57 00:03:07,022 --> 00:03:09,262 Speaker 3: or we walk around with nothing in our ears and 58 00:03:09,302 --> 00:03:11,742 Speaker 3: we reconnect with our environment. 59 00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:14,982 Speaker 2: What do we think. I've got those air pods that 60 00:03:15,262 --> 00:03:19,662 Speaker 2: cancel surround sound, and I coveted them for ages. I 61 00:03:19,702 --> 00:03:22,382 Speaker 2: heard someone fancy on a podcast talking about them once 62 00:03:22,462 --> 00:03:24,782 Speaker 2: and I was like, that's what I need, and I 63 00:03:24,822 --> 00:03:27,902 Speaker 2: bought them as a treat. Because they're expensive. I'm in 64 00:03:27,942 --> 00:03:30,782 Speaker 2: a love hate relationship with them, which is why this 65 00:03:31,022 --> 00:03:35,022 Speaker 2: does resonate because prosecco problems, it's like you put them 66 00:03:35,062 --> 00:03:39,262 Speaker 2: in and you feel very disconnected from the world suddenly, 67 00:03:39,302 --> 00:03:40,702 Speaker 2: and you're like, yeah, I wanted to listen to my 68 00:03:40,742 --> 00:03:42,982 Speaker 2: podcast and my music, but I didn't necessarily want to 69 00:03:43,022 --> 00:03:46,382 Speaker 2: be completely cut off from everybody else. But then the 70 00:03:46,422 --> 00:03:49,342 Speaker 2: problem is you get addicted to them, and now if 71 00:03:49,342 --> 00:03:52,102 Speaker 2: they're not in noise canceling, I don't feel like I 72 00:03:52,142 --> 00:03:54,702 Speaker 2: can focus. So I think they're like, as you say, 73 00:03:54,702 --> 00:03:57,182 Speaker 2: it's like it's a learning the other thing that's annoying 74 00:03:57,222 --> 00:04:01,422 Speaker 2: about them. And again, prosecco problems, they turn down when 75 00:04:01,502 --> 00:04:04,222 Speaker 2: someone talks to you, these fancy ones really, So if 76 00:04:04,222 --> 00:04:05,862 Speaker 2: you come up to me and you're like, Holly, I 77 00:04:05,862 --> 00:04:08,702 Speaker 2: needed a blah, it turns down. And the thing about 78 00:04:08,702 --> 00:04:09,942 Speaker 2: that is I don't want to listen to you. I 79 00:04:09,942 --> 00:04:12,982 Speaker 2: want to listen to my So I'm like, shut up, 80 00:04:13,062 --> 00:04:15,982 Speaker 2: I've just missed the five really important words that Megan 81 00:04:16,022 --> 00:04:19,102 Speaker 2: Markle just said in her latest four hour interview, so 82 00:04:19,142 --> 00:04:20,541 Speaker 2: that you could tell me it was time to go 83 00:04:20,582 --> 00:04:22,261 Speaker 2: and do some work. I don't know into it. 84 00:04:22,382 --> 00:04:25,462 Speaker 3: I find them very claustrophobic. I don't like the feeling. 85 00:04:25,462 --> 00:04:28,421 Speaker 1: I think it's interesting to think about how the ubiquity 86 00:04:28,421 --> 00:04:31,342 Speaker 1: of them has changed our relationship with the world en 87 00:04:31,421 --> 00:04:34,421 Speaker 1: mass and I think back to that Apple ad, which 88 00:04:34,462 --> 00:04:36,821 Speaker 1: I know that you lot loved, but I was depressed 89 00:04:36,821 --> 00:04:40,701 Speaker 1: by the Pedro Pascal where he's walking through a busy 90 00:04:40,741 --> 00:04:43,262 Speaker 1: city street and the seasons past the four year passes, 91 00:04:43,262 --> 00:04:45,061 Speaker 1: and I believe he's getting over a breakup and then 92 00:04:45,061 --> 00:04:48,381 Speaker 1: he needs someone new. I found it profoundly depressing because, 93 00:04:48,582 --> 00:04:52,342 Speaker 1: setting aside the dreaminess of Pedro Pascal, what you saw 94 00:04:52,421 --> 00:04:55,341 Speaker 1: there was he was completely disconnected from all these amazing 95 00:04:55,381 --> 00:04:57,462 Speaker 1: things that were happening around him because he had his 96 00:04:57,501 --> 00:04:59,821 Speaker 1: air pods in, and it struck me as almost sinister. 97 00:05:00,101 --> 00:05:01,782 Speaker 2: No one can sell me the end of the world 98 00:05:01,902 --> 00:05:02,342 Speaker 2: like Pedro. 99 00:05:03,861 --> 00:05:06,182 Speaker 3: I hate as well that I have friends who are 100 00:05:06,181 --> 00:05:08,582 Speaker 3: dealing with you know, newborns or whatever at home, and 101 00:05:08,782 --> 00:05:12,022 Speaker 3: one of them does headphones when they're trying to sleep whatever, 102 00:05:12,061 --> 00:05:13,782 Speaker 3: which I semi get. But it's also like, at what 103 00:05:13,902 --> 00:05:16,662 Speaker 3: point is our house being robbed and we don't know? 104 00:05:16,861 --> 00:05:19,821 Speaker 3: At what point has a plane crashed in our backyard 105 00:05:20,101 --> 00:05:21,301 Speaker 3: and we are not aware. 106 00:05:21,342 --> 00:05:22,181 Speaker 2: They're not that good. 107 00:05:22,342 --> 00:05:27,022 Speaker 1: I need to mention ear Wax look it's Friday. Yeah. 108 00:05:27,582 --> 00:05:30,901 Speaker 1: I often think about the compacting of earwax that is 109 00:05:30,941 --> 00:05:33,902 Speaker 1: happening when we jam those air pods into our areas. Now, 110 00:05:33,941 --> 00:05:36,421 Speaker 1: this is not based in anything scientific apart from a 111 00:05:36,421 --> 00:05:38,861 Speaker 1: feeling that I am compacting earwax. Is that just a 112 00:05:38,902 --> 00:05:39,462 Speaker 1: me problem? 113 00:05:39,662 --> 00:05:41,222 Speaker 3: No, that's a really good question. 114 00:05:41,262 --> 00:05:41,822 Speaker 2: I wonder. 115 00:05:42,222 --> 00:05:45,662 Speaker 3: No, But I wonder if constant wearing is not good right, 116 00:05:45,702 --> 00:05:48,141 Speaker 3: because I've got friends who have talked about going to 117 00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:51,101 Speaker 3: the doctor realizing they've got lots, get it all sorted, 118 00:05:51,101 --> 00:05:53,302 Speaker 3: and suddenly everything's really loud, and it all is a 119 00:05:53,301 --> 00:05:53,941 Speaker 3: great feeling. 120 00:05:54,061 --> 00:05:57,342 Speaker 1: And some people, such as maybe me, go to sleep 121 00:05:57,381 --> 00:05:59,821 Speaker 1: sometimes with the air pods in listening to the Ezra 122 00:05:59,902 --> 00:06:03,382 Speaker 1: Cline podcast, and look, I know that's a sickness. But 123 00:06:03,462 --> 00:06:05,662 Speaker 1: I just worry about the ear wax situation. 124 00:06:05,941 --> 00:06:07,782 Speaker 3: I know. I would like a doctor to please tell 125 00:06:07,902 --> 00:06:10,262 Speaker 3: us if we should be worried about that, if that's 126 00:06:10,301 --> 00:06:12,022 Speaker 3: also making it worse for our ears. 127 00:06:12,222 --> 00:06:15,461 Speaker 1: I will say that Jennifer Aniston was recently photographed with 128 00:06:15,662 --> 00:06:20,981 Speaker 1: the old school apple wire earbuds, and it made me think, 129 00:06:21,142 --> 00:06:23,261 Speaker 1: that's a woman that knows how to live. And if 130 00:06:23,301 --> 00:06:25,902 Speaker 1: she's got the wired ones back, maybe we should all 131 00:06:25,941 --> 00:06:26,461 Speaker 1: be doing. 132 00:06:26,262 --> 00:06:28,741 Speaker 2: It, if only she was aspirational to the young people. 133 00:06:28,782 --> 00:06:32,301 Speaker 2: Because the kids nag parents for air pods, right, you know, teenagers, 134 00:06:32,342 --> 00:06:35,701 Speaker 2: tween ages, and they're very expensive and they are exceptionally 135 00:06:35,741 --> 00:06:38,941 Speaker 2: easy to lose. So usually you resist and you resist, 136 00:06:38,981 --> 00:06:40,422 Speaker 2: and then they might get a pair of old ones 137 00:06:40,462 --> 00:06:43,141 Speaker 2: or whatever. But if the wired ones were still cool, 138 00:06:43,861 --> 00:06:45,181 Speaker 2: there's so much more affordable. 139 00:06:45,582 --> 00:06:47,981 Speaker 3: I've had wireless ones stolen off a pram, and I 140 00:06:48,061 --> 00:06:51,541 Speaker 3: have had my air pods. I leave the box everywhere, 141 00:06:51,582 --> 00:06:53,181 Speaker 3: like I just I've left the box on a plane 142 00:06:53,222 --> 00:06:55,342 Speaker 3: and stuff. I get my wireless back in. 143 00:06:55,462 --> 00:06:58,462 Speaker 1: I want to track a single left air bud as 144 00:06:58,462 --> 00:07:01,101 Speaker 1: it traveled the world after I left it on a plane. 145 00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:05,342 Speaker 2: Having a little adventure without you. Sit with me, friends, 146 00:07:05,702 --> 00:07:09,782 Speaker 2: while we get very real about something. Approximately half you 147 00:07:09,862 --> 00:07:12,342 Speaker 2: are going to find this very useful. What we're about 148 00:07:12,381 --> 00:07:15,381 Speaker 2: to talk about. You're either already doing it or you 149 00:07:15,422 --> 00:07:18,622 Speaker 2: will immediately start at Google doc when we stop talking today. 150 00:07:19,022 --> 00:07:22,021 Speaker 2: The other half will throw their phone in the ocean. 151 00:07:22,102 --> 00:07:24,542 Speaker 2: That's me, Yeah, here we go. Let me tell you 152 00:07:24,582 --> 00:07:28,422 Speaker 2: why it's about death. I know it's Friday. I know 153 00:07:28,462 --> 00:07:30,581 Speaker 2: we promised you fun, but I promise you This is 154 00:07:30,662 --> 00:07:34,222 Speaker 2: very interesting and it may change your life. It starts 155 00:07:34,222 --> 00:07:37,862 Speaker 2: with the newsletter, right. This newsletter was titled the Most 156 00:07:37,902 --> 00:07:40,781 Speaker 2: Loving Thing You Can Do, and it's by Elie Lernon. 157 00:07:41,262 --> 00:07:43,461 Speaker 2: Now she writes this newsletter called Pulling the Thread. She 158 00:07:43,582 --> 00:07:46,022 Speaker 2: used to work for Goop, and I subscribe to this 159 00:07:46,102 --> 00:07:49,422 Speaker 2: newsletter because I thought one day, one day, she's going 160 00:07:49,502 --> 00:07:51,142 Speaker 2: to spill all the beans. 161 00:07:50,742 --> 00:07:53,382 Speaker 3: About Okay, you're a prescribe for the Gossip and you 162 00:07:53,462 --> 00:07:53,862 Speaker 3: got death. 163 00:07:53,982 --> 00:07:57,702 Speaker 2: Yeah, because here we are. NDA's Alasia ain't never gonna 164 00:07:57,742 --> 00:08:00,261 Speaker 2: tell us what really went down at Goop. But she's 165 00:08:00,302 --> 00:08:02,342 Speaker 2: also a writer and a speaker, and she's been on 166 00:08:02,381 --> 00:08:04,862 Speaker 2: no filter. She's like, she's a really interesting woman. Anyway, 167 00:08:05,381 --> 00:08:07,982 Speaker 2: As I say, this newsletter was called the most Loving 168 00:08:08,022 --> 00:08:10,862 Speaker 2: Thing You can Do. She writes that eight years ago 169 00:08:11,222 --> 00:08:14,982 Speaker 2: she lost her brother in law, her brother's beloved partner, Pete, 170 00:08:15,062 --> 00:08:19,021 Speaker 2: and she says, every year, to honor Pete's passing, I 171 00:08:19,102 --> 00:08:22,102 Speaker 2: do a little bit of personal housekeeping that might strike 172 00:08:22,142 --> 00:08:25,622 Speaker 2: you as morbid, but I believe it's actually the most 173 00:08:25,662 --> 00:08:27,742 Speaker 2: loving thing you can do for the people you love. 174 00:08:28,381 --> 00:08:31,222 Speaker 2: In August, every year, I go through a document that 175 00:08:31,342 --> 00:08:33,742 Speaker 2: is shared with my husband and my brother and I 176 00:08:33,902 --> 00:08:39,862 Speaker 2: update any critical information in the event I might unexpectedly die. Now, 177 00:08:39,982 --> 00:08:42,062 Speaker 2: what do you think. I'll tell you what she puts 178 00:08:42,062 --> 00:08:43,662 Speaker 2: in it. But what's your first reactions? 179 00:08:43,822 --> 00:08:46,902 Speaker 3: My reaction is to sit down and do that would 180 00:08:46,902 --> 00:08:50,022 Speaker 3: be to accept an inevitability. I am not prepared yet 181 00:08:50,102 --> 00:08:50,662 Speaker 3: to accept. 182 00:08:51,262 --> 00:08:53,382 Speaker 2: This is the two types of people argument, Amelia. How 183 00:08:53,422 --> 00:08:54,542 Speaker 2: are you feeling about it so far? 184 00:08:54,662 --> 00:08:56,902 Speaker 1: I hate opening Google docs at the best of times. 185 00:08:57,102 --> 00:08:57,982 Speaker 1: Alone one about death? 186 00:08:58,142 --> 00:09:01,422 Speaker 2: Okay, here we go. She talks about how the practicalities 187 00:09:01,422 --> 00:09:03,942 Speaker 2: of death, from immediate arrangements to the cancelation of so 188 00:09:04,022 --> 00:09:07,422 Speaker 2: many parts of someone's life, everything from credit cards to 189 00:09:07,502 --> 00:09:11,022 Speaker 2: bank accounts to social media accounts, are often beyond the 190 00:09:11,062 --> 00:09:14,702 Speaker 2: abilities of the closest mourners right when somebody loses somebody, 191 00:09:15,062 --> 00:09:18,862 Speaker 2: And also it's really hard to uncover and excavate, she writes. 192 00:09:19,102 --> 00:09:21,022 Speaker 2: You want the people you love to be able to 193 00:09:21,102 --> 00:09:24,542 Speaker 2: mourn without needing to hack into your email account. You 194 00:09:24,582 --> 00:09:27,302 Speaker 2: don't want your partner or siblings guessing where you might 195 00:09:27,342 --> 00:09:30,382 Speaker 2: have bank accounts. Most importantly, you want to give your 196 00:09:30,382 --> 00:09:32,902 Speaker 2: people the opportunity to honor you in the way you 197 00:09:32,942 --> 00:09:36,662 Speaker 2: would most appreciate. Nobody wants to guess about that. Here's 198 00:09:36,702 --> 00:09:38,302 Speaker 2: an example of just some of the things she lists 199 00:09:38,342 --> 00:09:42,102 Speaker 2: in this Google doc. Email passwords, right, so email accounts 200 00:09:42,102 --> 00:09:45,262 Speaker 2: and passwords, phone and computer codes. So this is my 201 00:09:45,302 --> 00:09:48,502 Speaker 2: passcode to my iPhone, this is my password to my computer. 202 00:09:48,982 --> 00:09:52,502 Speaker 2: Mortgage details, other debts, life insurance, home insurance, car insurance, 203 00:09:52,502 --> 00:09:55,542 Speaker 2: club and gym memberships. And then there's some less practical, 204 00:09:55,622 --> 00:09:58,062 Speaker 2: more personal stuff like I would like my organs to 205 00:09:58,062 --> 00:10:00,222 Speaker 2: be donated, yes, no, that kind of stuff. I would 206 00:10:00,262 --> 00:10:02,622 Speaker 2: like my body to be buried or cremated, yes, snow, 207 00:10:02,942 --> 00:10:05,022 Speaker 2: I would like to be buried in this location. So 208 00:10:05,102 --> 00:10:08,262 Speaker 2: basically your wishes. Put it all in one document that 209 00:10:08,302 --> 00:10:11,381 Speaker 2: the people closest to you you know exactly where it is. 210 00:10:11,942 --> 00:10:14,142 Speaker 2: And she says, this is the most loving thing you 211 00:10:14,182 --> 00:10:14,582 Speaker 2: can do. 212 00:10:15,302 --> 00:10:21,102 Speaker 3: Thoughts, it's clearly a brilliant idea and a very important 213 00:10:21,462 --> 00:10:23,582 Speaker 3: thing to do. And there are a lot of people 214 00:10:23,622 --> 00:10:26,302 Speaker 3: I know whose families have been torn apart by trying 215 00:10:26,302 --> 00:10:28,822 Speaker 3: to make these decisions by committee in the wake of 216 00:10:28,862 --> 00:10:33,062 Speaker 3: someone's death. That would just be awful. But it's a 217 00:10:33,102 --> 00:10:35,662 Speaker 3: really hard conversation to broach with someone I know that 218 00:10:35,702 --> 00:10:38,862 Speaker 3: there are books that are basically like here's what to 219 00:10:38,902 --> 00:10:41,982 Speaker 3: do if I die? And it's like a spreadsheet, but 220 00:10:42,102 --> 00:10:43,702 Speaker 3: it's like a little organizer. 221 00:10:44,302 --> 00:10:46,022 Speaker 2: What birthday do you go? 222 00:10:46,422 --> 00:10:47,782 Speaker 3: Happy eightieth dad? 223 00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:48,662 Speaker 1: Here's a gift? 224 00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:50,822 Speaker 3: Like, how do you even see. 225 00:10:50,742 --> 00:10:51,342 Speaker 2: The tricky part? 226 00:10:51,502 --> 00:10:53,582 Speaker 3: Broach that? And I think the other reason why people 227 00:10:53,582 --> 00:10:57,182 Speaker 3: are hesitant is because they're actually crippled with indecision about 228 00:10:57,182 --> 00:10:59,502 Speaker 3: some of those things. Obviously there are quite clear things 229 00:10:59,502 --> 00:11:01,662 Speaker 3: like here's my email password, blah blah blah. But the 230 00:11:01,702 --> 00:11:04,462 Speaker 3: thing of where do I want to be buried? How 231 00:11:04,462 --> 00:11:07,102 Speaker 3: do I want to be remembered? What do you want 232 00:11:07,102 --> 00:11:09,102 Speaker 3: the music? I'm like, I have no idea. 233 00:11:09,542 --> 00:11:11,702 Speaker 2: It's not compulsory that you put all that stuff in. 234 00:11:11,822 --> 00:11:13,302 Speaker 2: You could just do the practical things. 235 00:11:13,462 --> 00:11:16,662 Speaker 3: And her point is really clever, which is we all 236 00:11:17,182 --> 00:11:21,102 Speaker 3: think this is, you know, a privilege. But some people 237 00:11:21,542 --> 00:11:24,622 Speaker 3: you know obviously have a diagnosis or something which changes 238 00:11:24,662 --> 00:11:26,662 Speaker 3: how the rest of their life looks. But most of 239 00:11:26,742 --> 00:11:28,862 Speaker 3: us are going, we'll live forrages. I don't need to 240 00:11:28,862 --> 00:11:30,822 Speaker 3: think about that. But she's saying, no, my brother in 241 00:11:30,902 --> 00:11:34,622 Speaker 3: law drop dead and left his family with a lot 242 00:11:34,622 --> 00:11:37,702 Speaker 3: of admin. So I suppose I see some people in 243 00:11:37,742 --> 00:11:40,382 Speaker 3: this life stage going okay, let's get the death stuff 244 00:11:40,382 --> 00:11:41,702 Speaker 3: out of the way, so we can go on living 245 00:11:41,702 --> 00:11:43,942 Speaker 3: and we don't have to think about it anymore. But 246 00:11:44,062 --> 00:11:46,702 Speaker 3: I also think that the two types of people is 247 00:11:47,342 --> 00:11:50,182 Speaker 3: some are so comfortable with dying. There are people in 248 00:11:50,222 --> 00:11:54,102 Speaker 3: my life at all different ages who are so comfortable 249 00:11:54,342 --> 00:11:58,182 Speaker 3: with that reality they can talk about it. And then 250 00:11:58,182 --> 00:12:00,822 Speaker 3: there are others. Again, some of them are young, some 251 00:12:00,862 --> 00:12:03,102 Speaker 3: of them are old who will just never come to 252 00:12:03,182 --> 00:12:05,022 Speaker 3: terms with it and it's always going to be something 253 00:12:05,062 --> 00:12:07,542 Speaker 3: that they try to avoid. And I think I'm in 254 00:12:07,582 --> 00:12:08,262 Speaker 3: the latter camp. 255 00:12:08,502 --> 00:12:10,742 Speaker 1: Look as you were talking, Holly, I realized I was 256 00:12:10,822 --> 00:12:14,462 Speaker 1: physically recoiling from my microphone. So that speaks to my 257 00:12:14,462 --> 00:12:17,062 Speaker 1: own personal comfort with this subject. But it did put 258 00:12:17,102 --> 00:12:19,662 Speaker 1: to mind a New Yorker story from twenty ten that 259 00:12:19,702 --> 00:12:22,102 Speaker 1: has stayed with me for fifteen years. Maybe it's the 260 00:12:22,142 --> 00:12:25,062 Speaker 1: most powerful article I've ever read. It was by the 261 00:12:25,102 --> 00:12:27,822 Speaker 1: physician a tool Go one day, who writes a lot 262 00:12:27,862 --> 00:12:31,462 Speaker 1: about public health and about how individuals can live healthier lives. 263 00:12:31,702 --> 00:12:33,542 Speaker 1: But this article is called letting Go, and it was 264 00:12:33,542 --> 00:12:36,502 Speaker 1: about the importance of talking to people you love about 265 00:12:36,702 --> 00:12:39,782 Speaker 1: what they value in life and what they are prepared 266 00:12:39,782 --> 00:12:41,742 Speaker 1: to put up with when it comes to medical care, 267 00:12:42,222 --> 00:12:45,662 Speaker 1: and he makes the point that people, until very recently, 268 00:12:45,742 --> 00:12:48,982 Speaker 1: dying was typically a very brief process, and these days, 269 00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:52,422 Speaker 1: a catastrophic sudden illness is of course possible, and we 270 00:12:52,462 --> 00:12:55,302 Speaker 1: all know people to whom that's happened, but it's much 271 00:12:55,422 --> 00:12:57,982 Speaker 1: rarer than it used to be. So as a result, 272 00:12:58,142 --> 00:13:02,222 Speaker 1: the dying process has become incredibly prolonged, and we sort 273 00:13:02,222 --> 00:13:06,182 Speaker 1: of expect doctors and medical practitioners to do everything they 274 00:13:06,262 --> 00:13:08,982 Speaker 1: can to prolong it, even when we or our loved 275 00:13:08,982 --> 00:13:11,462 Speaker 1: ones might not want that. And he tells this one 276 00:13:11,502 --> 00:13:13,822 Speaker 1: story that I will never forget in this article, which 277 00:13:13,862 --> 00:13:17,542 Speaker 1: is this daughter spoke to her dying father about what 278 00:13:17,662 --> 00:13:20,862 Speaker 1: he wanted in terms of medical care, and he said. 279 00:13:20,862 --> 00:13:23,742 Speaker 1: The conversation was agonizing. There's no sugarcoating it. It was 280 00:13:23,862 --> 00:13:26,862 Speaker 1: incredibly difficult for both this daughter and her father, and 281 00:13:26,902 --> 00:13:29,142 Speaker 1: he had this illness, and she said, what are you 282 00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:31,382 Speaker 1: prepared to put up with? He said, as long as 283 00:13:31,422 --> 00:13:33,862 Speaker 1: I can keep eating chocolate ice cream, I'm watching football 284 00:13:33,902 --> 00:13:35,622 Speaker 1: on TV. I want to stick around and I want 285 00:13:35,622 --> 00:13:37,982 Speaker 1: to fight. But when I can't do those things anymore, 286 00:13:37,982 --> 00:13:40,102 Speaker 1: I don't want to be here. And so it became 287 00:13:40,142 --> 00:13:42,782 Speaker 1: a litmus test whenever he had a surgery, it was like, well, 288 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:44,702 Speaker 1: will he be able to eat chocolate ice cream and 289 00:13:44,742 --> 00:13:47,542 Speaker 1: watch football and TV after this? If yes, go ahead. 290 00:13:47,622 --> 00:13:50,142 Speaker 1: And then eventually it got to the point where he 291 00:13:50,182 --> 00:13:53,142 Speaker 1: couldn't eat anymore. He couldn't eat chocolate ice cream, he 292 00:13:53,142 --> 00:13:55,422 Speaker 1: couldn't eat anything. So at that point they knew he 293 00:13:55,422 --> 00:13:58,782 Speaker 1: had to move to hospice. It's just the most powerful idea. 294 00:13:58,982 --> 00:14:01,262 Speaker 2: This is really interesting because it's the thing is there 295 00:14:01,302 --> 00:14:03,382 Speaker 2: are different groups of people who talk about this in 296 00:14:03,422 --> 00:14:03,982 Speaker 2: a different way. 297 00:14:04,062 --> 00:14:04,262 Speaker 1: Right. 298 00:14:04,422 --> 00:14:08,822 Speaker 2: What you're describing there in terms of is like they 299 00:14:08,862 --> 00:14:10,982 Speaker 2: often call it a need of advanced care. Where you 300 00:14:11,102 --> 00:14:13,542 Speaker 2: get somebody who is, you know, maybe edging towards that 301 00:14:13,582 --> 00:14:15,422 Speaker 2: part of their life to write down or their wishes 302 00:14:15,462 --> 00:14:18,302 Speaker 2: in case things happen to them which are more about 303 00:14:18,342 --> 00:14:20,782 Speaker 2: their own care and as you say, at what place 304 00:14:20,782 --> 00:14:24,462 Speaker 2: they want intervention. That's also a really difficult conversation to 305 00:14:24,502 --> 00:14:27,222 Speaker 2: breach with people. But what an excellent filter. 306 00:14:27,622 --> 00:14:29,582 Speaker 3: Yeah, and it can be called a living will. 307 00:14:29,662 --> 00:14:32,342 Speaker 2: It can be called a living will exactly. And when 308 00:14:32,382 --> 00:14:35,142 Speaker 2: I interviewed this amazing woman called doctor Jackie Bailey on 309 00:14:35,222 --> 00:14:39,462 Speaker 2: mid last year, she said, ideally everybody who's older should 310 00:14:39,502 --> 00:14:40,822 Speaker 2: have one of those, and she said, you know, if 311 00:14:40,822 --> 00:14:43,822 Speaker 2: they're not googled dot kind of people, output in a 312 00:14:43,862 --> 00:14:45,622 Speaker 2: plastic folder, keep it on top of the fridge, tell 313 00:14:45,622 --> 00:14:47,302 Speaker 2: everybody where it is, and just leave it there. And 314 00:14:47,302 --> 00:14:48,982 Speaker 2: it's got that kind of stuff and if you care 315 00:14:49,022 --> 00:14:50,902 Speaker 2: about it, the funeral stuff and all those kind of things, 316 00:14:50,942 --> 00:14:53,102 Speaker 2: and maybe some of these things that Alice Lehman is 317 00:14:53,142 --> 00:14:57,182 Speaker 2: talking about too. The tricky part is, as you've touched on, Jesse, 318 00:14:57,502 --> 00:14:59,382 Speaker 2: is there are two types of people. I know because 319 00:14:59,422 --> 00:15:02,342 Speaker 2: I'm in this live stage where most of my peer 320 00:15:02,382 --> 00:15:05,542 Speaker 2: group is going through various degrees of issues with their 321 00:15:05,582 --> 00:15:10,182 Speaker 2: parents around illness, health, ongoing, quality of life, and dying. 322 00:15:10,862 --> 00:15:14,302 Speaker 2: And there are some people whose parents are fighting fit 323 00:15:14,342 --> 00:15:16,262 Speaker 2: at the moment, but they are death cleaning like crazy, 324 00:15:16,302 --> 00:15:18,662 Speaker 2: you know, clearing out the garage, clearing out the attic, 325 00:15:19,182 --> 00:15:21,942 Speaker 2: deciding to downside, making all these very practive decisions, and 326 00:15:21,982 --> 00:15:23,302 Speaker 2: they're like, I don't want you to have to worry 327 00:15:23,342 --> 00:15:25,462 Speaker 2: about this. And then there's the second group of people 328 00:15:25,542 --> 00:15:28,302 Speaker 2: to the two types of people argument, who are like, going, 329 00:15:28,422 --> 00:15:30,702 Speaker 2: I want to live my life exactly as I've always 330 00:15:30,742 --> 00:15:32,582 Speaker 2: lived my life for as long as I possibly can, 331 00:15:32,902 --> 00:15:34,862 Speaker 2: and then when something goes pair shaped, we'll deal with 332 00:15:34,902 --> 00:15:37,302 Speaker 2: it then, right. And the thing is is that, as 333 00:15:37,342 --> 00:15:40,462 Speaker 2: any adult children of parents will say, is that can 334 00:15:40,502 --> 00:15:43,502 Speaker 2: be that can be very difficult for them when the 335 00:15:43,542 --> 00:15:46,982 Speaker 2: inevitable happens. But is it fair to try and force 336 00:15:47,062 --> 00:15:50,502 Speaker 2: someone into a very difficult conversation to make your life 337 00:15:50,542 --> 00:15:52,582 Speaker 2: more convenient? You know what I mean? And I'm being 338 00:15:52,622 --> 00:15:54,342 Speaker 2: flippant when I say that, because I know there's a 339 00:15:54,342 --> 00:15:56,582 Speaker 2: lot more to it than Oh, it would be convenient 340 00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:58,182 Speaker 2: for me if I knew what all the passwords were 341 00:15:58,222 --> 00:16:00,062 Speaker 2: and I knew exactly what you wanted to do. But 342 00:16:00,782 --> 00:16:04,182 Speaker 2: it's difficult. But what Dr Jackie Bailey suggested to me, 343 00:16:04,222 --> 00:16:06,262 Speaker 2: because she said, some people who are very uncomfortable with 344 00:16:06,262 --> 00:16:08,542 Speaker 2: talking about death, you've got to provoke them into it. 345 00:16:08,582 --> 00:16:11,302 Speaker 2: This was one of her tips. So she said, for example, 346 00:16:11,422 --> 00:16:14,062 Speaker 2: if your parents or some person that you love who's 347 00:16:14,102 --> 00:16:16,702 Speaker 2: going through this, you know, for example that maybe they 348 00:16:16,702 --> 00:16:20,382 Speaker 2: are very non religious, provoke them with something like so 349 00:16:20,462 --> 00:16:25,982 Speaker 2: obviously you'd want a priest to come, or I know 350 00:16:26,022 --> 00:16:29,302 Speaker 2: what song you'd like? You love blah blah blah, and 351 00:16:29,422 --> 00:16:31,782 Speaker 2: you'd be like Daisies by Justin Biebe. You'd like that 352 00:16:31,782 --> 00:16:33,942 Speaker 2: would you know whatever, and they'll be like what, And 353 00:16:33,982 --> 00:16:37,742 Speaker 2: she said, provoke them into talking about it, because that's 354 00:16:37,822 --> 00:16:39,782 Speaker 2: often a way to kind of get the ball rolling 355 00:16:39,822 --> 00:16:42,102 Speaker 2: in a fashion that's a bit more accessible. And then 356 00:16:42,142 --> 00:16:44,302 Speaker 2: the other thing she said, which is to the elast 357 00:16:44,342 --> 00:16:48,382 Speaker 2: learmon thing, is she's encouraging people who aren't elderly to 358 00:16:48,462 --> 00:16:52,302 Speaker 2: do this in case of unexpected eventualities. Doctor Bailey told 359 00:16:52,342 --> 00:16:54,102 Speaker 2: me that we should all be doing it anyway, because 360 00:16:54,142 --> 00:16:56,022 Speaker 2: then we'll have a better understanding of what it's like 361 00:16:56,062 --> 00:16:58,222 Speaker 2: for our parents. Like if you've done it yourself. 362 00:16:58,702 --> 00:16:59,862 Speaker 1: Oh, that's such a good point. 363 00:17:00,102 --> 00:17:03,062 Speaker 2: If you've done it yourself, then then you know like 364 00:17:03,182 --> 00:17:05,702 Speaker 2: what it's like and how confronting it is and things 365 00:17:05,742 --> 00:17:08,182 Speaker 2: for your parents. But the thing is is for elderly people, 366 00:17:08,702 --> 00:17:11,182 Speaker 2: it is so fronting to suddenly be told, well, think 367 00:17:11,182 --> 00:17:13,381 Speaker 2: about it, mum, Like how many someone's do you think 368 00:17:13,422 --> 00:17:14,981 Speaker 2: you've got? You know what I mean? Like it's so 369 00:17:15,341 --> 00:17:17,661 Speaker 2: up close, and some people are comfortable and some people 370 00:17:17,702 --> 00:17:18,262 Speaker 2: just start. 371 00:17:18,061 --> 00:17:21,182 Speaker 3: Huh yeah, I think too. The living will thing is 372 00:17:21,422 --> 00:17:23,542 Speaker 3: really interesting. And I was speaking to someone last year 373 00:17:23,742 --> 00:17:27,982 Speaker 3: about AI advancements and they were saying that there is 374 00:17:28,222 --> 00:17:32,542 Speaker 3: this new technology that they're developing, which is basically the 375 00:17:32,581 --> 00:17:36,741 Speaker 3: way that AI can scan your medical records, your preferences, 376 00:17:36,742 --> 00:17:40,901 Speaker 3: conversations you've had with doctors, whatever, and predict what you 377 00:17:40,942 --> 00:17:44,381 Speaker 3: would want at a stage. So someone who for example, 378 00:17:44,581 --> 00:17:46,782 Speaker 3: the one that I think about a lot is dementia, 379 00:17:46,942 --> 00:17:49,382 Speaker 3: and that can progress really fast, and it's really hard 380 00:17:49,381 --> 00:17:52,142 Speaker 3: when someone gets a diagnosis to go, all right, what 381 00:17:52,141 --> 00:17:55,981 Speaker 3: are you like? Talk about just you know, worse nightmare, 382 00:17:56,022 --> 00:17:57,821 Speaker 3: what you don't even want to think about down the track, 383 00:17:57,861 --> 00:18:00,581 Speaker 3: But it's going what would this person want? And that's 384 00:18:00,581 --> 00:18:02,382 Speaker 3: the thing that families are grappling with all the time. 385 00:18:02,381 --> 00:18:03,901 Speaker 3: Would they want to be here? Would they want to 386 00:18:03,942 --> 00:18:04,341 Speaker 3: be here? 387 00:18:04,462 --> 00:18:07,782 Speaker 1: And the ambiguity of dementia and the way it makes 388 00:18:07,821 --> 00:18:10,622 Speaker 1: ambiguous what the persons suffering from it would want has 389 00:18:10,661 --> 00:18:13,861 Speaker 1: come up just this week because Bruce Willis's wife is 390 00:18:13,982 --> 00:18:16,341 Speaker 1: under all sorts of scrutiny because she's come out and 391 00:18:16,381 --> 00:18:20,101 Speaker 1: said that she lives separately from Bruce Willis because she 392 00:18:20,302 --> 00:18:22,621 Speaker 1: thinks that their children need a little bit of space 393 00:18:22,661 --> 00:18:25,142 Speaker 1: from him, and she said that that's best for them, 394 00:18:25,141 --> 00:18:26,782 Speaker 1: but she's facing a lot of flag for it. 395 00:18:26,901 --> 00:18:29,221 Speaker 2: Yeah, And to be fair, she said that They've built 396 00:18:29,621 --> 00:18:31,982 Speaker 2: a beautiful, comfortable home for him, with everything he'd want. 397 00:18:32,022 --> 00:18:34,821 Speaker 2: It's not just like off you go, Bruce. But yeah, 398 00:18:34,861 --> 00:18:37,941 Speaker 2: so much criticism. It's really interesting. We'll put a link 399 00:18:37,982 --> 00:18:40,141 Speaker 2: to the newsletter about the Google doc in the show 400 00:18:40,141 --> 00:18:43,261 Speaker 2: notes and to the interview do to Jackie Bailey. And 401 00:18:43,341 --> 00:18:46,022 Speaker 2: obviously of these issues you're grappling with right now, out 402 00:18:46,061 --> 00:18:48,262 Speaker 2: Louder is just sending you enormous love. 403 00:18:48,542 --> 00:18:51,142 Speaker 3: Can I throw in an additional recommendation too. I read 404 00:18:51,182 --> 00:18:53,262 Speaker 3: a book a few years ago called Staring at the 405 00:18:53,262 --> 00:18:57,061 Speaker 3: Sun by doctor Irvin D. Yellam, and it is about 406 00:18:57,061 --> 00:18:59,781 Speaker 3: overcoming the dread of death and death anxiety. He's a 407 00:18:59,782 --> 00:19:02,621 Speaker 3: therapist who worked with people with quite profound death anxiety. 408 00:19:03,141 --> 00:19:05,302 Speaker 3: I think about it all the time. If there's someone 409 00:19:05,621 --> 00:19:08,101 Speaker 3: in your life who broaches that is an issue that 410 00:19:08,141 --> 00:19:11,181 Speaker 3: they find like stressing at any stage, it can just 411 00:19:11,222 --> 00:19:13,621 Speaker 3: be a useful thing. Sometimes it's better to look at 412 00:19:13,621 --> 00:19:14,061 Speaker 3: in the eye. 413 00:19:14,061 --> 00:19:16,621 Speaker 2: I think we've made our own version of this really 414 00:19:16,661 --> 00:19:18,821 Speaker 2: at Muma mea a sort of template to help start 415 00:19:18,861 --> 00:19:21,061 Speaker 2: your off prompts some of these conversations if they're difficult, 416 00:19:21,141 --> 00:19:23,142 Speaker 2: or if you want to do this yourself, and we'll 417 00:19:23,141 --> 00:19:24,982 Speaker 2: put a link to that in the show notes too. 418 00:19:25,901 --> 00:19:28,901 Speaker 1: Out Louders in a moment why we're so obsessed with 419 00:19:29,022 --> 00:19:32,462 Speaker 1: rich people's weddings. There's an influencer who's taking the idea 420 00:19:32,462 --> 00:19:36,262 Speaker 1: of extravagant nuptials to whole new heights, and surprisingly the 421 00:19:36,302 --> 00:19:37,061 Speaker 1: internet loves it. 422 00:19:41,222 --> 00:19:44,101 Speaker 3: Out Louders, We've got a listener dilemma, and we need 423 00:19:44,222 --> 00:19:47,422 Speaker 3: your collective wisdom to help us and our partners at 424 00:19:47,542 --> 00:19:50,621 Speaker 3: UI solve it. Please, here's the problem from our listener. 425 00:19:51,422 --> 00:19:55,061 Speaker 3: I'm in a really awkward situation and need some advice. Yesterday, 426 00:19:55,101 --> 00:19:58,422 Speaker 3: one of my close friends accidentally sent me a screenshot 427 00:19:58,502 --> 00:20:02,302 Speaker 3: that has left me feeling completely betrayed. The screenshot showed 428 00:20:02,341 --> 00:20:06,302 Speaker 3: our recent and private text conversation where I'd been venting 429 00:20:06,302 --> 00:20:10,222 Speaker 3: about my relationship. I shared some pretty intimate details about 430 00:20:10,222 --> 00:20:12,942 Speaker 3: our issues. But what made my stomach drop was seeing 431 00:20:12,942 --> 00:20:15,542 Speaker 3: that she had clearly screenshot at our private chat to 432 00:20:15,581 --> 00:20:18,701 Speaker 3: share it with someone else. She'd obviously been forwarding my 433 00:20:18,742 --> 00:20:22,381 Speaker 3: personal relationship details to someone when she accidentally sent the 434 00:20:22,381 --> 00:20:25,421 Speaker 3: screenshot to me instead. I don't think she has figured 435 00:20:25,422 --> 00:20:27,701 Speaker 3: out what she's done yet. I trusted her with some 436 00:20:27,742 --> 00:20:30,982 Speaker 3: really private information that I'd never told anyone, and now 437 00:20:31,022 --> 00:20:33,022 Speaker 3: I know she was planning to share it all behind 438 00:20:33,022 --> 00:20:36,661 Speaker 3: my back. Should I confront her about that accidental screenshot 439 00:20:36,742 --> 00:20:39,982 Speaker 3: and call her out? Or do I quietly distance myself 440 00:20:40,022 --> 00:20:44,302 Speaker 3: and never confide in her again. I'm angry, I'm hurt. 441 00:20:44,581 --> 00:20:47,142 Speaker 3: The question is what do you do next? 442 00:20:48,262 --> 00:20:52,661 Speaker 1: That's so bad. I'm so sorry. That's such a betrayal 443 00:20:52,782 --> 00:20:56,262 Speaker 1: and it must feel so awful. I think you got 444 00:20:56,302 --> 00:20:58,661 Speaker 1: to call her out for it, for sure, And my 445 00:20:58,782 --> 00:21:01,141 Speaker 1: warning to you is that she's probably going to get defensive. 446 00:21:01,222 --> 00:21:04,381 Speaker 1: You're probably not going to get the heartfelt apology that 447 00:21:04,422 --> 00:21:06,821 Speaker 1: you're hoping for, and there'll probably be some kind of 448 00:21:06,861 --> 00:21:09,741 Speaker 1: excuse made, if not an outright denial. But you have 449 00:21:09,782 --> 00:21:12,502 Speaker 1: to confront her, and then you have to move on. 450 00:21:12,782 --> 00:21:15,581 Speaker 3: And then I think not share details with her anymore. 451 00:21:15,581 --> 00:21:19,262 Speaker 3: She's clearly someone who can't be trusted. The fact she 452 00:21:19,302 --> 00:21:21,741 Speaker 3: hasn't noticed it yet. Oh, it's just also awful. But 453 00:21:22,381 --> 00:21:25,982 Speaker 3: I think you have to say something because I'm trying 454 00:21:26,022 --> 00:21:27,941 Speaker 3: to look at this from another angle, going is there 455 00:21:27,982 --> 00:21:30,861 Speaker 3: another reason she might have screenshot the text? And I 456 00:21:31,302 --> 00:21:32,302 Speaker 3: can't think of one. 457 00:21:32,262 --> 00:21:36,542 Speaker 2: So Pollyanna had on possible excuse? Oh, I was going 458 00:21:36,581 --> 00:21:41,742 Speaker 2: to forward it to a relationship counselor friend of mine 459 00:21:42,262 --> 00:21:45,022 Speaker 2: who would treat it with much discretion but maybe have 460 00:21:45,141 --> 00:21:46,742 Speaker 2: some very useful advice. 461 00:21:47,302 --> 00:21:50,222 Speaker 3: Or it was an accidental screenshot, or I do think 462 00:21:50,222 --> 00:21:51,182 Speaker 3: something I was. 463 00:21:51,141 --> 00:21:52,581 Speaker 2: In a hurry and I didn't see it, but like 464 00:21:52,702 --> 00:21:55,302 Speaker 2: she might have a reason like that. But as you say, 465 00:21:55,381 --> 00:21:57,142 Speaker 2: merely whether or not you're going to believe it. 466 00:21:57,502 --> 00:22:00,821 Speaker 1: There is one caveat I can think of is if 467 00:22:00,821 --> 00:22:03,702 Speaker 1: she feels her friend is an actual danger, which has 468 00:22:03,782 --> 00:22:06,061 Speaker 1: happened to a friend of mine in the past, maybe 469 00:22:06,101 --> 00:22:09,061 Speaker 1: she's seeking some advice from someone on whether it intervene 470 00:22:09,101 --> 00:22:09,941 Speaker 1: more pro actively. 471 00:22:10,101 --> 00:22:11,941 Speaker 3: Yes, Oh, that's actually really true. 472 00:22:12,581 --> 00:22:14,462 Speaker 2: It's true. Not that I want to start like making 473 00:22:14,502 --> 00:22:16,302 Speaker 2: excuses for this person, because it is a terrible thing 474 00:22:16,341 --> 00:22:19,661 Speaker 2: to do, but sometimes being the person who has to 475 00:22:19,742 --> 00:22:23,222 Speaker 2: handle all the heaviness of someone else's really difficult situation 476 00:22:23,381 --> 00:22:25,502 Speaker 2: is hard and you need to share that load. But 477 00:22:26,141 --> 00:22:29,381 Speaker 2: in general, I think it's clear what's happened here. You 478 00:22:29,462 --> 00:22:31,821 Speaker 2: need to work out if you can forgive it at all. 479 00:22:32,061 --> 00:22:34,941 Speaker 2: Out louders, what would you do next? Share your thoughts 480 00:22:34,942 --> 00:22:37,622 Speaker 2: in the Mama Mia outloud Facebook group, and also if 481 00:22:37,661 --> 00:22:39,861 Speaker 2: you have a dilemma. Send it to us at out 482 00:22:39,861 --> 00:22:42,581 Speaker 2: loud at mamamea dot com dot au. We would love 483 00:22:42,702 --> 00:22:43,261 Speaker 2: to help you. 484 00:22:43,861 --> 00:22:46,662 Speaker 1: I want to talk about weddings. We're entering wedding season 485 00:22:46,942 --> 00:22:49,782 Speaker 1: and specifically I want to talk about rich people's weddings, 486 00:22:49,861 --> 00:22:53,581 Speaker 1: happy days, What could be better? There is a rich 487 00:22:53,661 --> 00:22:57,381 Speaker 1: person wedding that we understand happened this past weekend. It 488 00:22:57,581 --> 00:23:01,142 Speaker 1: was an influencer no One as Becca Bloom on TikTok, 489 00:23:01,302 --> 00:23:04,542 Speaker 1: real name Rebecca mar She only joined TikTok in January, 490 00:23:04,661 --> 00:23:08,022 Speaker 1: but she already has four million followers, and the Wall 491 00:23:08,022 --> 00:23:12,101 Speaker 1: Street Journal recently crowned her the Queen of Rich Talk now. 492 00:23:12,141 --> 00:23:16,421 Speaker 1: Becker is very wealthy. The money comes largely from her parents. 493 00:23:16,462 --> 00:23:18,821 Speaker 1: They founded a tech company in China before she was born. 494 00:23:18,901 --> 00:23:21,101 Speaker 1: She grew up in the San Francisco area, and she 495 00:23:21,222 --> 00:23:24,702 Speaker 1: herself is doing very well financially. She sold a tech 496 00:23:24,702 --> 00:23:26,861 Speaker 1: company in high school for about three hundred and fifty 497 00:23:26,901 --> 00:23:30,022 Speaker 1: thousand dollars, and she currently works at some kind of 498 00:23:30,061 --> 00:23:33,662 Speaker 1: fintech company. She hasn't said what company that is. She's 499 00:23:33,702 --> 00:23:37,582 Speaker 1: also engaged now married to an executive at Amazon, so 500 00:23:37,661 --> 00:23:40,542 Speaker 1: clearly there's a lot of money floating around there, and 501 00:23:40,581 --> 00:23:43,942 Speaker 1: we are talking a lot of money. So for instance, 502 00:23:44,061 --> 00:23:46,902 Speaker 1: just to give you some ideas, she feeds her cat Cavia. 503 00:23:47,302 --> 00:23:50,342 Speaker 1: The cat prefers actually sushi grade salmon, but will put 504 00:23:50,341 --> 00:23:53,262 Speaker 1: that aside. It doesn't who doesn't. She goes on date 505 00:23:53,341 --> 00:23:56,981 Speaker 1: nights with her fiance, stopping by jewelers to get diamonds. 506 00:23:57,101 --> 00:23:59,981 Speaker 1: He gives her surprise channel boots. They watch White Lotus 507 00:23:59,982 --> 00:24:02,302 Speaker 1: in their private cinema, you know, regular date night stuff. 508 00:24:02,581 --> 00:24:04,701 Speaker 2: So I'd never heard of her, right, Jesse was like, 509 00:24:04,702 --> 00:24:04,941 Speaker 2: oh she. 510 00:24:05,381 --> 00:24:06,341 Speaker 1: Do you love her? Jesse? 511 00:24:06,861 --> 00:24:10,342 Speaker 3: She is all over my feed. She's got a very 512 00:24:10,341 --> 00:24:14,662 Speaker 3: calming voice, and as someone who is revolted by conspicuous 513 00:24:14,661 --> 00:24:17,742 Speaker 3: consumption and could not care less about designer anything, can't 514 00:24:17,742 --> 00:24:20,502 Speaker 3: pronounce any of the things she's talking about. I must 515 00:24:20,542 --> 00:24:23,542 Speaker 3: say there is something quite charismatic about her. 516 00:24:23,462 --> 00:24:26,141 Speaker 2: Definitely, But my head fell off because I didn't know 517 00:24:26,262 --> 00:24:28,142 Speaker 2: she was and you directed me to her. And she's 518 00:24:28,182 --> 00:24:30,981 Speaker 2: funny and she's clever and she's very good creator. But 519 00:24:32,182 --> 00:24:34,621 Speaker 2: I was like, I am watching a woman. She was like, 520 00:24:34,942 --> 00:24:37,221 Speaker 2: I think the one I watched she was put my 521 00:24:37,302 --> 00:24:39,701 Speaker 2: jewelry on with me. While I recommend five books you 522 00:24:39,742 --> 00:24:43,742 Speaker 2: should read immediately, and then she's literally piling on millions 523 00:24:43,782 --> 00:24:47,342 Speaker 2: of dollars literal millions of dollars of van kleef Arpel 524 00:24:47,462 --> 00:24:50,222 Speaker 2: and how you say it, yeah, and all this stuff 525 00:24:50,341 --> 00:24:52,462 Speaker 2: while she's telling me to read The Righteous Mind by 526 00:24:52,502 --> 00:24:57,542 Speaker 2: Jonathan Hid And I'm like, what weird third dimension have 527 00:24:57,621 --> 00:24:59,861 Speaker 2: I moved into? Now? And then she's like, as she said, 528 00:25:00,182 --> 00:25:02,542 Speaker 2: I'm feeding my dog. I've got these special plates for them. 529 00:25:02,542 --> 00:25:03,861 Speaker 2: I'm going to play it up while I taught to you. 530 00:25:04,061 --> 00:25:07,101 Speaker 2: And You're like, I didn't know this world existed? Am 531 00:25:07,101 --> 00:25:09,502 Speaker 2: I happy I've stumbled on it? I'm not sure. 532 00:25:09,782 --> 00:25:11,542 Speaker 1: Well, this is what I want to talk about. Because 533 00:25:11,542 --> 00:25:13,262 Speaker 1: a lot of people feel the same way as Jesse. 534 00:25:13,381 --> 00:25:16,381 Speaker 1: They love her, They find her calming. Her wedding is 535 00:25:16,462 --> 00:25:18,701 Speaker 1: going to be insane. We haven't actually seen the photos 536 00:25:18,782 --> 00:25:20,781 Speaker 1: yet because she hasn't posted them, but we believe it 537 00:25:20,821 --> 00:25:24,262 Speaker 1: was on this past weekend at an eighteenth century broker 538 00:25:24,302 --> 00:25:27,462 Speaker 1: state on Lake Como. Was estimated to cost five hundred 539 00:25:27,462 --> 00:25:31,022 Speaker 1: thousand dollars for two hundred guests. But the Internet loves 540 00:25:31,061 --> 00:25:34,341 Speaker 1: her so A sample comment on one of her posts is, 541 00:25:34,422 --> 00:25:36,942 Speaker 1: when I say eat the rich, I would never mean you. 542 00:25:37,422 --> 00:25:40,341 Speaker 2: Beca gets a free pass because she's funny in charm well, 543 00:25:40,422 --> 00:25:41,181 Speaker 2: is that why? 544 00:25:41,302 --> 00:25:43,701 Speaker 1: I have another theory as to why so. I wanted 545 00:25:43,742 --> 00:25:46,941 Speaker 1: to compare the sort of adoration that she gets to 546 00:25:47,022 --> 00:25:50,461 Speaker 1: the reception that Lauren Bezos get out the world's Smallest 547 00:25:50,502 --> 00:25:54,542 Speaker 1: violin got to her nupshaws to Jeff Bezos and Venice recently, 548 00:25:54,621 --> 00:25:57,182 Speaker 1: and I think we can safely say most people were 549 00:25:57,462 --> 00:26:00,221 Speaker 1: ridiculing them, were disgusted by the show of wealth, the 550 00:26:00,262 --> 00:26:02,821 Speaker 1: phone party on the yacht, all of that. I'm just 551 00:26:02,861 --> 00:26:07,142 Speaker 1: more interested in why she gets a pass or influences 552 00:26:07,222 --> 00:26:09,942 Speaker 1: like Beca Bloom get a pass when other rich people's 553 00:26:09,942 --> 00:26:12,101 Speaker 1: weddings are really put under the microscope. 554 00:26:12,502 --> 00:26:18,621 Speaker 3: I reckon that Becka's self awareness, the way she wears 555 00:26:18,661 --> 00:26:20,942 Speaker 3: it and owns it with a bit of a sense 556 00:26:20,982 --> 00:26:25,542 Speaker 3: of humor, is incredibly refreshing for people. What people don't 557 00:26:25,581 --> 00:26:27,821 Speaker 3: like is rich people who pretend they're not really. 558 00:26:27,901 --> 00:26:30,821 Speaker 2: I don't think that that's qualifies Bezos. I don't know. 559 00:26:31,462 --> 00:26:33,662 Speaker 2: No one was being modest to being right. 560 00:26:33,702 --> 00:26:36,462 Speaker 3: There is something about that It felt like it was papped, 561 00:26:36,821 --> 00:26:39,902 Speaker 3: and there were elements of that wedding that we got 562 00:26:39,942 --> 00:26:46,022 Speaker 3: access to. But Becka has this vibe of you're at 563 00:26:46,101 --> 00:26:50,141 Speaker 3: your really rich friend's house who you quite like, even 564 00:26:50,141 --> 00:26:53,341 Speaker 3: though they're really really rich, and they're showing you all 565 00:26:53,381 --> 00:26:56,341 Speaker 3: the jewelry, and you're kind of just they're going, oh 566 00:26:56,341 --> 00:26:57,381 Speaker 3: my goodness, she has. 567 00:26:57,262 --> 00:26:59,421 Speaker 2: A wedding tree. Tell us what a wedding tree is. 568 00:26:59,462 --> 00:27:01,341 Speaker 3: Okay, I'd never heard of a wedding tree. It's sort 569 00:27:01,341 --> 00:27:03,902 Speaker 3: of like a Christmas tree, Holly, And what people do 570 00:27:04,182 --> 00:27:06,421 Speaker 3: is they put all their gifts for your wedding under it. 571 00:27:06,861 --> 00:27:09,222 Speaker 3: Except this isn't like a toaster. 572 00:27:09,061 --> 00:27:12,022 Speaker 2: No, I don't need no toasters. 573 00:27:12,502 --> 00:27:17,341 Speaker 3: Ermez, the hatress, Silence, and also a Chanel bag which 574 00:27:17,341 --> 00:27:20,982 Speaker 3: she does unboxings, which I must be clear, I feel 575 00:27:21,022 --> 00:27:21,742 Speaker 3: physically sick. 576 00:27:21,861 --> 00:27:23,462 Speaker 2: I was watching I do not like it. I was 577 00:27:23,502 --> 00:27:26,061 Speaker 2: watching her do some of those and she opens something 578 00:27:26,422 --> 00:27:28,821 Speaker 2: from Mez or whatever, and it was like, this is 579 00:27:28,861 --> 00:27:32,742 Speaker 2: a wedding present to myself for committing to doing my best. 580 00:27:35,821 --> 00:27:38,701 Speaker 2: She's not even really pretending that she's getting married because 581 00:27:38,702 --> 00:27:41,341 Speaker 2: she wants to marry this guy. It's like, this is 582 00:27:41,381 --> 00:27:43,942 Speaker 2: another scene in my life, and we get a lot 583 00:27:43,942 --> 00:27:46,222 Speaker 2: of presents for it. She must also be getting paid 584 00:27:46,222 --> 00:27:47,821 Speaker 2: by all these jewelry brands, so she's not. 585 00:27:47,861 --> 00:27:50,382 Speaker 3: Vinal No, apparently not. Apparently not. 586 00:27:50,661 --> 00:27:52,742 Speaker 2: She is an ambassador for Van kliefer Pell. 587 00:27:52,942 --> 00:27:57,501 Speaker 1: Anyway back to your point. 588 00:27:55,661 --> 00:27:57,501 Speaker 2: Get back to your point. Can I just on your 589 00:27:57,502 --> 00:28:00,141 Speaker 2: theory though, Can I just say there's very valid reasons 590 00:28:00,141 --> 00:28:03,821 Speaker 2: for disapproving of Bezos. We probably don't know that much 591 00:28:04,061 --> 00:28:05,662 Speaker 2: about where Mars mony. 592 00:28:06,141 --> 00:28:07,141 Speaker 1: Know where she works. 593 00:28:07,222 --> 00:28:09,341 Speaker 2: Yes, So I think that, you know, really a lot 594 00:28:09,381 --> 00:28:11,901 Speaker 2: of the ridicule we have for Bezos and that wedding 595 00:28:11,901 --> 00:28:14,621 Speaker 2: and the showiness of that and the five day extravaganza 596 00:28:14,661 --> 00:28:16,782 Speaker 2: and all the people who went to it is also 597 00:28:16,901 --> 00:28:18,421 Speaker 2: kind of to do with And I'm just going to 598 00:28:18,502 --> 00:28:21,901 Speaker 2: gesture broadly and go the world right now, and we 599 00:28:21,982 --> 00:28:25,341 Speaker 2: can kind of hold the Bezoses of the world who 600 00:28:25,381 --> 00:28:29,102 Speaker 2: are at Donald Trump's inauguration, who are, you know, decimating 601 00:28:29,182 --> 00:28:31,861 Speaker 2: traditional industries around them? We can kind of hold them 602 00:28:31,901 --> 00:28:34,302 Speaker 2: accountable for it, right Whereas Beca Bloom we're just like, 603 00:28:34,661 --> 00:28:37,341 Speaker 2: who knows, Maybe she got all that money by lovely means, 604 00:28:37,341 --> 00:28:39,062 Speaker 2: And I'm really happy for her diamonds. 605 00:28:39,142 --> 00:28:42,022 Speaker 3: So it's interesting that her proximity to Amazon as well, 606 00:28:42,062 --> 00:28:45,342 Speaker 3: the fact that her husband is an Amazon executive kind 607 00:28:45,382 --> 00:28:48,181 Speaker 3: of doesn't seem to taint her image. But when I 608 00:28:48,422 --> 00:28:51,181 Speaker 3: started being served videos of her, it was her telling 609 00:28:51,262 --> 00:28:53,582 Speaker 3: me what it was like to grow up that rich. 610 00:28:53,982 --> 00:28:56,662 Speaker 3: And there's an element of like purviness. She was just 611 00:28:56,942 --> 00:28:58,742 Speaker 3: born into this wild life. 612 00:28:59,262 --> 00:28:59,822 Speaker 2: That's it. 613 00:29:00,422 --> 00:29:03,902 Speaker 1: Great segue. I think this is about how we feel 614 00:29:04,022 --> 00:29:06,822 Speaker 1: about gold diggers, and I'm sorry to use the term, 615 00:29:07,022 --> 00:29:09,142 Speaker 1: but I'm throwing it on the table because I think 616 00:29:09,182 --> 00:29:10,382 Speaker 1: that's why what's going on here. 617 00:29:10,462 --> 00:29:12,302 Speaker 2: But she's not a gold digger, right exactly. 618 00:29:12,822 --> 00:29:16,822 Speaker 1: So the Bezos wedding is about this idea that Lauren 619 00:29:16,902 --> 00:29:19,782 Speaker 1: Bezos is marrying up. And it turns out there's a 620 00:29:19,782 --> 00:29:22,142 Speaker 1: word for it, when you marry into a different social class. 621 00:29:22,182 --> 00:29:26,822 Speaker 1: It's called hypergamy, not to be confused with bigamy. Hypergamy, 622 00:29:26,862 --> 00:29:29,182 Speaker 1: I don't know if I'm pronouncing that right. And we've 623 00:29:29,182 --> 00:29:31,662 Speaker 1: got a number of examples of that floating around right now. 624 00:29:31,661 --> 00:29:35,542 Speaker 1: There's Lauren Bezos, there's Huma Aberdeen, who is the Democratic 625 00:29:35,542 --> 00:29:39,502 Speaker 1: operative who married a Sorrows recently, and Milania Trump is 626 00:29:39,622 --> 00:29:42,942 Speaker 1: arguably a kind of archetype of that too. And there's 627 00:29:42,982 --> 00:29:45,302 Speaker 1: a lot of different feelings going around about how we 628 00:29:45,302 --> 00:29:47,582 Speaker 1: should feel about these women who are marrying up. If 629 00:29:47,582 --> 00:29:50,102 Speaker 1: you look at Cold Her Daddy. That podcast kind of 630 00:29:50,142 --> 00:29:53,102 Speaker 1: frames marrying up as a smart business decision. It does. 631 00:29:53,661 --> 00:29:55,781 Speaker 1: Or think of the TikTok that blew up. Let's have 632 00:29:56,062 --> 00:29:56,822 Speaker 1: a listen to it. 633 00:29:56,942 --> 00:30:00,182 Speaker 3: I'm looking for a Man in Finance Trust don six 634 00:30:00,262 --> 00:30:04,382 Speaker 3: five Finance Trust Fun six five. 635 00:30:05,382 --> 00:30:07,981 Speaker 2: That was a banger of last summer, I think in it. 636 00:30:07,982 --> 00:30:10,862 Speaker 1: It's also the movie in Aura, movie Materialists. All of 637 00:30:10,902 --> 00:30:14,221 Speaker 1: these movies and pop culture moments are about embracing the 638 00:30:14,262 --> 00:30:17,021 Speaker 1: idea of marrying up as a smart thing to do 639 00:30:17,102 --> 00:30:18,701 Speaker 1: as a woman in a world where the system has 640 00:30:18,742 --> 00:30:22,102 Speaker 1: rigged against you. Inequality has never been more rampant, And 641 00:30:22,182 --> 00:30:24,622 Speaker 1: yet we also hate women who do that. We also 642 00:30:24,661 --> 00:30:25,982 Speaker 1: feel disdain for them. 643 00:30:26,102 --> 00:30:27,422 Speaker 3: They can't trust them. 644 00:30:27,302 --> 00:30:29,502 Speaker 1: We can't trust them. Becca Bloom didn't do that. She 645 00:30:29,582 --> 00:30:32,102 Speaker 1: grew up rich. Yeah, she's marrying a rich guy. But 646 00:30:32,142 --> 00:30:34,102 Speaker 1: that's actually kind of beside the point. I think that 647 00:30:34,222 --> 00:30:37,221 Speaker 1: money comes from her family, and from familial wealth. 648 00:30:37,262 --> 00:30:38,342 Speaker 2: That is so depressing. 649 00:30:38,902 --> 00:30:41,622 Speaker 3: I think too. I was reading this piece in the 650 00:30:41,622 --> 00:30:43,902 Speaker 3: Wall Street Journal about her that was saying, we live 651 00:30:43,902 --> 00:30:47,181 Speaker 3: in an age of such status anxiety that even the 652 00:30:47,222 --> 00:30:50,062 Speaker 3: really rich don't feel like they have enough. Like there's 653 00:30:50,102 --> 00:30:52,782 Speaker 3: a real to be able to look down the barrel 654 00:30:52,822 --> 00:30:55,302 Speaker 3: of a camera and go, I am really rich. I've 655 00:30:55,302 --> 00:30:58,142 Speaker 3: always been rich, I will always be rich. Come and 656 00:30:58,182 --> 00:31:00,502 Speaker 3: have a look at my house. Is like the reason 657 00:31:00,502 --> 00:31:03,862 Speaker 3: why her content goes viral is because she's exceptionally rich. 658 00:31:04,062 --> 00:31:06,302 Speaker 3: Like there was one that she did recently. She needed 659 00:31:06,302 --> 00:31:08,181 Speaker 3: wedding shoes or whatever, and so she just got on 660 00:31:08,222 --> 00:31:10,302 Speaker 3: her private jet and went to Paris. I didn't know 661 00:31:10,382 --> 00:31:13,862 Speaker 3: that people did that. And there's such normally a wall 662 00:31:13,942 --> 00:31:17,462 Speaker 3: up and a privacy about wealth where people who are 663 00:31:17,942 --> 00:31:20,542 Speaker 3: low income or middle income do talk about money. They 664 00:31:20,582 --> 00:31:22,142 Speaker 3: talk about salary, and they talk about rent, and they 665 00:31:22,142 --> 00:31:25,501 Speaker 3: talk about mortgages. But when people edge into those kind 666 00:31:25,542 --> 00:31:28,062 Speaker 3: of upper echelons, it becomes a little bit kind of. 667 00:31:28,142 --> 00:31:30,822 Speaker 2: Her wall will come up. Like she's only been doing 668 00:31:30,822 --> 00:31:33,302 Speaker 2: this since January. She is putting a massive target on 669 00:31:33,342 --> 00:31:34,382 Speaker 2: her head in many ways. 670 00:31:34,582 --> 00:31:37,102 Speaker 1: No, but think of say the Sofia Richie Grange wedding, 671 00:31:37,102 --> 00:31:40,422 Speaker 1: which was another real celebrity wedding moment. She got married 672 00:31:40,422 --> 00:31:42,701 Speaker 1: in twenty twenty three, and that was kind of like 673 00:31:43,022 --> 00:31:45,862 Speaker 1: the crowning of quiet luxury, Like that was the culmination 674 00:31:45,982 --> 00:31:47,701 Speaker 1: of that trend. She got married in a number of 675 00:31:47,782 --> 00:31:50,022 Speaker 1: different design and dresses. I think she now created three 676 00:31:50,022 --> 00:31:52,622 Speaker 1: of them for the weekend. She was very celebrated on 677 00:31:52,702 --> 00:31:55,502 Speaker 1: the internet. And that's because she's Linel Richie's daughter. She's 678 00:31:55,622 --> 00:31:56,262 Speaker 1: rich herself. 679 00:31:56,302 --> 00:31:58,181 Speaker 2: But do you think the people who because and obviously 680 00:31:58,222 --> 00:32:01,102 Speaker 2: when Becka Bloom's wedding photos dropped, because everybody's been very 681 00:32:01,102 --> 00:32:03,981 Speaker 2: invested in the journey. She's tried on twenty million dresses 682 00:32:03,982 --> 00:32:05,461 Speaker 2: and all the jewels and d da da da da, 683 00:32:06,142 --> 00:32:08,862 Speaker 2: when they drop, will everybody be watching it with aspiration? 684 00:32:09,102 --> 00:32:11,822 Speaker 2: All they've watching it like a sort of freak show almost. 685 00:32:11,902 --> 00:32:14,622 Speaker 3: That's what's bizarre, is it that I seem to be 686 00:32:14,782 --> 00:32:17,421 Speaker 3: laced with some aspiration? It's not how I watch it. 687 00:32:17,462 --> 00:32:20,782 Speaker 3: But if we view weddings as content now, which is 688 00:32:20,782 --> 00:32:23,582 Speaker 3: really what they are, they're a great content strategy for 689 00:32:23,622 --> 00:32:26,502 Speaker 3: at least six months. You know, you do the tryons, 690 00:32:26,542 --> 00:32:29,182 Speaker 3: you do the venue. She's going to have so much 691 00:32:29,222 --> 00:32:29,862 Speaker 3: content out of this. 692 00:32:30,022 --> 00:32:32,021 Speaker 1: That's why we say, will you take me as your 693 00:32:32,022 --> 00:32:33,142 Speaker 1: content strategy? 694 00:32:33,622 --> 00:32:35,701 Speaker 2: Because it's literal, but it is literally that right. Like 695 00:32:35,742 --> 00:32:38,142 Speaker 2: I know this is an unpopular thing to say, but 696 00:32:38,342 --> 00:32:40,862 Speaker 2: choosing a place that you have no connection to not 697 00:32:40,902 --> 00:32:42,582 Speaker 2: that I mean, maybe I'm wrong, maybe she has a 698 00:32:42,582 --> 00:32:44,782 Speaker 2: deep connection to it, but like a beautiful villa and 699 00:32:44,862 --> 00:32:46,342 Speaker 2: Lake Como as your film set. 700 00:32:46,422 --> 00:32:48,942 Speaker 3: You're just saying that, Holly, because you've started learning Italian, 701 00:32:49,022 --> 00:32:52,302 Speaker 3: so you think you're like, you don't even do Dui 702 00:32:52,342 --> 00:32:53,262 Speaker 3: lingo every day. 703 00:32:54,262 --> 00:32:56,462 Speaker 2: It's like, this is the film set for what I'm 704 00:32:56,502 --> 00:32:58,862 Speaker 2: imagining here, because you're so right. You know, we're obsessed 705 00:32:58,862 --> 00:33:01,822 Speaker 2: with this stuff, and we know that weddings in ordinary 706 00:33:01,862 --> 00:33:04,542 Speaker 2: people's lives give them a content strategy for six weeks 707 00:33:04,582 --> 00:33:07,542 Speaker 2: at least. But if you contrast this with say Charlie 708 00:33:07,622 --> 00:33:10,062 Speaker 2: XCX's wedding, which was in the northern summer in London 709 00:33:10,182 --> 00:33:12,421 Speaker 2: this year, where they went to the town hall, Hackney 710 00:33:12,422 --> 00:33:14,262 Speaker 2: town Hall, which is a very cool place to get married. 711 00:33:14,462 --> 00:33:15,902 Speaker 2: It used to be Chelsea town Hall, but no, that's 712 00:33:15,942 --> 00:33:18,062 Speaker 2: Hackney town Hall and you wear a short dress and 713 00:33:18,062 --> 00:33:19,142 Speaker 2: then you go to the pub and you have a 714 00:33:19,142 --> 00:33:20,741 Speaker 2: pint in the city and then you just have a 715 00:33:20,742 --> 00:33:23,461 Speaker 2: party with your mates. Now, obviously that's very true to 716 00:33:23,582 --> 00:33:27,782 Speaker 2: Charlie XCX's brand, but to me it feels like an 717 00:33:27,822 --> 00:33:30,902 Speaker 2: actual wedding that's about getting married to somebody and celebrating 718 00:33:30,902 --> 00:33:33,942 Speaker 2: your mates these kind of weddings, and I know that 719 00:33:34,062 --> 00:33:35,982 Speaker 2: you could argue that I'm jealous and dah da da dah, 720 00:33:35,982 --> 00:33:39,382 Speaker 2: but they just feel like a performance. There doesn't feel 721 00:33:39,382 --> 00:33:41,782 Speaker 2: like there's anything real about it. And the idea that 722 00:33:41,782 --> 00:33:44,182 Speaker 2: you can invite all mom and Dad's rich, rich friends 723 00:33:44,182 --> 00:33:45,422 Speaker 2: and they'll put presents under your tree. 724 00:33:45,502 --> 00:33:48,022 Speaker 1: You don't need performances. 725 00:33:48,182 --> 00:33:49,822 Speaker 2: Yeah, but there's levels, isn't there. 726 00:33:50,262 --> 00:33:53,822 Speaker 3: I reckon too that there's something distinctly American about this phenomenon. 727 00:33:53,862 --> 00:33:56,022 Speaker 3: Becka Bloom doesn't exist in the UK, and she does 728 00:33:56,142 --> 00:33:57,262 Speaker 3: not exist in Australia. 729 00:33:57,582 --> 00:33:58,982 Speaker 1: I don't know if that's true, and. 730 00:33:58,902 --> 00:34:00,902 Speaker 3: You'll imagine how different it would look in the UK 731 00:34:01,022 --> 00:34:03,062 Speaker 3: because there's such a sense of new money and old money. 732 00:34:03,382 --> 00:34:05,262 Speaker 2: I think about royal we. 733 00:34:06,822 --> 00:34:08,822 Speaker 3: I'm not talking about weddings. I'm talking about content on 734 00:34:08,862 --> 00:34:12,221 Speaker 3: TikTok and the idea that there's transparency. Like in the UK, 735 00:34:12,342 --> 00:34:15,542 Speaker 3: there's a real sense of privacy. I'm thinking about Saltburn 736 00:34:15,661 --> 00:34:17,382 Speaker 3: and the way that there is a certain amount of 737 00:34:17,382 --> 00:34:20,462 Speaker 3: wealth that becomes very very private. But if Becka Bloom 738 00:34:20,462 --> 00:34:23,462 Speaker 3: existed in Australia, she would have a much larger target 739 00:34:23,502 --> 00:34:25,301 Speaker 3: on her back. I think and in the US. There's 740 00:34:25,342 --> 00:34:28,261 Speaker 3: a thing about the American dream and aspiration. And if 741 00:34:28,302 --> 00:34:30,181 Speaker 3: I just work hard enough, I too will have my 742 00:34:30,181 --> 00:34:34,062 Speaker 3: wedding in like Como with my gift tree. After the break, 743 00:34:34,342 --> 00:34:36,982 Speaker 3: we've got some recommendations just in time for your weekend, 744 00:34:37,221 --> 00:34:39,782 Speaker 3: including Holly's very fancy beauty. 745 00:34:39,942 --> 00:34:42,462 Speaker 2: I feel like Beca Blooms exactly right. 746 00:34:42,502 --> 00:34:44,502 Speaker 3: We've got Becker Bloom over here with a present under 747 00:34:44,542 --> 00:34:45,102 Speaker 3: a gift tree. 748 00:34:46,302 --> 00:34:46,702 Speaker 2: Bloom. 749 00:34:46,822 --> 00:34:47,502 Speaker 1: What did she say? 750 00:34:47,542 --> 00:34:51,181 Speaker 3: She said, I'm giving it to myself for trying. 751 00:34:50,261 --> 00:34:52,662 Speaker 2: For committing to trying my best. 752 00:34:53,022 --> 00:34:54,982 Speaker 3: That's why Holly bought her self a balm. 753 00:34:55,502 --> 00:34:59,221 Speaker 2: One unlimited out loud access. We drop episodes every Tuesday 754 00:34:59,261 --> 00:35:03,381 Speaker 2: and Thursday exclusively for Mamma Mia subscribers. Follow the link 755 00:35:03,382 --> 00:35:05,142 Speaker 2: of the show notes to get us in your ears 756 00:35:05,382 --> 00:35:08,142 Speaker 2: five days a week, and a huge thank you to 757 00:35:08,302 --> 00:35:09,422 Speaker 2: all our current. 758 00:35:09,142 --> 00:35:17,062 Speaker 3: Subscrib Before we get to recommendations, I need to tell 759 00:35:17,102 --> 00:35:20,262 Speaker 3: you about ned the snail. A woman in New Zealand. 760 00:35:20,302 --> 00:35:22,702 Speaker 3: Her name is Gizelle. She was hanging in her garden 761 00:35:22,942 --> 00:35:26,542 Speaker 3: like you, Holly, and she noticed a snail. 762 00:35:27,661 --> 00:35:29,381 Speaker 2: I see snails. Oh my god, you know what I 763 00:35:29,382 --> 00:35:29,741 Speaker 2: do with them? 764 00:35:29,862 --> 00:35:29,942 Speaker 1: What? 765 00:35:30,142 --> 00:35:32,861 Speaker 2: No, I can't say Actually, I don't kill them. Don't worry. 766 00:35:32,902 --> 00:35:34,382 Speaker 2: I'm not going to kill them, but just put you 767 00:35:34,422 --> 00:35:36,261 Speaker 2: move them up. I throw them. I picked them off 768 00:35:36,261 --> 00:35:38,982 Speaker 2: because they're eating your things. Okay, pick them off, throw 769 00:35:39,062 --> 00:35:39,542 Speaker 2: them in the hedge. 770 00:35:39,661 --> 00:35:41,661 Speaker 3: Well that's what Gizelle was going to do, Holly, and 771 00:35:41,741 --> 00:35:44,902 Speaker 3: Gizelle is very into the environment. So you're allowed to 772 00:35:44,902 --> 00:35:46,701 Speaker 3: throw your snail as long as you don't track that 773 00:35:47,622 --> 00:35:51,022 Speaker 3: hard gentless exactly right. So she was just going to 774 00:35:51,102 --> 00:35:54,622 Speaker 3: kind of move the snail along, was her euphemism, when 775 00:35:54,622 --> 00:35:58,142 Speaker 3: she noticed something unusual about Ned, and that was that 776 00:35:58,221 --> 00:36:02,982 Speaker 3: Ned had a shell that spiraled to the right. The 777 00:36:03,022 --> 00:36:06,781 Speaker 3: reason that's interesting is that nearly all snails on their 778 00:36:06,942 --> 00:36:08,421 Speaker 3: shell spirals to the left. 779 00:36:08,422 --> 00:36:11,661 Speaker 2: Oh my god, I did How closely are you looking 780 00:36:11,661 --> 00:36:12,462 Speaker 2: at this? Okale? 781 00:36:12,502 --> 00:36:15,462 Speaker 3: Well, I should say that Gizelle was primed to notice 782 00:36:15,502 --> 00:36:18,942 Speaker 3: this because she works for the New Zealand geographic magazine. Right, 783 00:36:18,982 --> 00:36:19,741 Speaker 3: so she knew this. 784 00:36:19,862 --> 00:36:25,741 Speaker 2: She's she's nail fluent, she knows she understand the significance 785 00:36:25,741 --> 00:36:26,222 Speaker 2: of shells. 786 00:36:26,221 --> 00:36:28,661 Speaker 3: Hang on, this is interesting. What's the big deal. Why 787 00:36:28,661 --> 00:36:31,221 Speaker 3: do we care that the snail shell's gone the wrong way? Well, 788 00:36:31,701 --> 00:36:36,261 Speaker 3: it's Ned's penis allow me to explain his reproductive organs 789 00:36:36,622 --> 00:36:40,301 Speaker 3: won't line up with other snails because their shell is 790 00:36:40,302 --> 00:36:42,861 Speaker 3: the other way. It's kind of like he's programmed the 791 00:36:42,902 --> 00:36:46,781 Speaker 3: opposite way around and in order for Ned to meet 792 00:36:46,822 --> 00:36:49,981 Speaker 3: a lovely like partner. I know this is very heteronormative. 793 00:36:50,062 --> 00:36:52,781 Speaker 3: We've not even asked Ned about his preferences where the 794 00:36:52,902 --> 00:36:57,702 Speaker 3: consent exactly. But if Ned wants to procreate. 795 00:36:57,221 --> 00:36:59,822 Speaker 2: Doesn't it every snail. It doesn't make little baby snails 796 00:36:59,942 --> 00:37:01,301 Speaker 2: exactly eat my cabbages. 797 00:37:01,382 --> 00:37:03,502 Speaker 3: If he wants to, then he needs to find a 798 00:37:03,542 --> 00:37:08,461 Speaker 3: snail with the same shell. Right, So people in music 799 00:37:08,502 --> 00:37:11,342 Speaker 3: this would only happen in New Zealand. In New Zealand 800 00:37:11,382 --> 00:37:14,781 Speaker 3: are being encouraged to find Ned a lady friend. They 801 00:37:14,781 --> 00:37:17,902 Speaker 3: are looking for a snail with a shell that spirals 802 00:37:17,902 --> 00:37:21,142 Speaker 3: to the left. Giselle has of course acknowledged that they 803 00:37:21,142 --> 00:37:24,462 Speaker 3: will need to be compatible personality wise and the sparks. 804 00:37:24,062 --> 00:37:27,501 Speaker 1: Will have far Can we help? Can we look? 805 00:37:27,661 --> 00:37:29,781 Speaker 3: Thank you, Amelia? That's what I thought, because we're not far, 806 00:37:29,942 --> 00:37:31,021 Speaker 3: are we We're not. 807 00:37:30,902 --> 00:37:33,582 Speaker 1: Far from snail to New Zealand exactly. 808 00:37:35,342 --> 00:37:37,822 Speaker 3: The one on a plane. I think that if someone 809 00:37:37,942 --> 00:37:39,901 Speaker 3: finds a little lady. 810 00:37:41,181 --> 00:37:42,941 Speaker 1: They're not protection going to be cool with them. 811 00:37:43,102 --> 00:37:43,861 Speaker 2: No, they're not. 812 00:37:44,661 --> 00:37:46,582 Speaker 3: Maybe it's just I feel like Ned couldn't get in, 813 00:37:46,942 --> 00:37:48,341 Speaker 3: but I feel like Nora could get out. 814 00:37:48,422 --> 00:37:50,341 Speaker 2: I don't want to be rude, Ned, but you're not 815 00:37:50,422 --> 00:37:54,901 Speaker 2: an endangered species. If Ned does not get to procreate, 816 00:37:56,102 --> 00:37:59,542 Speaker 2: the garden snails will be fine. But then we're the 817 00:37:59,582 --> 00:38:03,781 Speaker 2: ones at the left side, they'll be all right. It's 818 00:38:03,942 --> 00:38:07,102 Speaker 2: very cute, but I'm sorry one less snail to chew 819 00:38:07,142 --> 00:38:09,062 Speaker 2: my cabbages. I'm here for it. 820 00:38:10,942 --> 00:38:15,861 Speaker 1: Vibes, ideas, atmosphere, something casual, something fun. This is my 821 00:38:15,942 --> 00:38:16,901 Speaker 1: best recommendation. 822 00:38:18,062 --> 00:38:19,982 Speaker 3: It's Friday, so we want to help set up your 823 00:38:19,982 --> 00:38:23,022 Speaker 3: weekend with our best recods. Holly, please go first. 824 00:38:23,142 --> 00:38:25,221 Speaker 2: I'm going to give you my beck at bloom Reco 825 00:38:25,542 --> 00:38:30,302 Speaker 2: my beca bloom Star recommendation. I'm currently obsessed with cheeks. 826 00:38:30,822 --> 00:38:34,062 Speaker 2: You don't know like where it's come from, but I 827 00:38:34,342 --> 00:38:36,861 Speaker 2: go through phases when it comes to beauty and skin things, 828 00:38:36,902 --> 00:38:39,422 Speaker 2: and at the minute, I'm like, I've noticed it because 829 00:38:39,422 --> 00:38:42,622 Speaker 2: we're always on video. I've noticed that if I've got 830 00:38:42,661 --> 00:38:44,942 Speaker 2: color in my face, I just look more alive. 831 00:38:45,701 --> 00:38:47,542 Speaker 3: That's a good so like a blush. 832 00:38:47,942 --> 00:38:50,062 Speaker 2: So I bought this thing because and this is the 833 00:38:50,062 --> 00:38:52,901 Speaker 2: most twenty twenty five midlife sentence you'll ever read. I 834 00:38:52,942 --> 00:38:58,861 Speaker 2: saw Naomi Watts recommend this in Miranda July's newsletter. It's 835 00:38:58,902 --> 00:39:02,542 Speaker 2: a bomb by a brand called Jones Road. Now, Jones 836 00:39:02,622 --> 00:39:05,142 Speaker 2: Road is Bobby Brown, you know, she's a very famous yep. 837 00:39:05,181 --> 00:39:06,701 Speaker 2: But she's got her own brand. She's had it for 838 00:39:06,741 --> 00:39:08,661 Speaker 2: a few years now, but it's only just become available 839 00:39:08,661 --> 00:39:11,502 Speaker 2: to be shipped to Australia, so it's available in Australia now. 840 00:39:11,862 --> 00:39:14,502 Speaker 2: And this barmb, it's called Miracle balm, is kind of 841 00:39:14,542 --> 00:39:16,741 Speaker 2: controversial because some people think it's great and some people 842 00:39:16,781 --> 00:39:18,422 Speaker 2: think it's a bit of nonsense, a bit of Emperor's 843 00:39:18,422 --> 00:39:20,221 Speaker 2: New clothes, because it's kind of like a blush or 844 00:39:20,221 --> 00:39:22,582 Speaker 2: a highlighter, or almost like a lip barmb. But it's 845 00:39:22,582 --> 00:39:25,582 Speaker 2: for your face and it comes in thirteen different shades, 846 00:39:25,862 --> 00:39:28,302 Speaker 2: and even the ones that are quite pigmented are quite sheer. 847 00:39:28,741 --> 00:39:31,182 Speaker 2: But it makes you feel like plump top and dewy, 848 00:39:31,181 --> 00:39:31,981 Speaker 2: and it gives you a bit. 849 00:39:31,902 --> 00:39:33,381 Speaker 3: Of a shine, but it doesn't give you a lot 850 00:39:33,382 --> 00:39:33,822 Speaker 3: of pigment. 851 00:39:34,022 --> 00:39:35,582 Speaker 2: Not a lot of pigment. They've got some of them 852 00:39:35,582 --> 00:39:38,102 Speaker 2: have got more pigment than others, and some are almost clear. 853 00:39:38,502 --> 00:39:40,901 Speaker 2: But I just I love I've been putting it on 854 00:39:41,022 --> 00:39:43,142 Speaker 2: and it just it kind of makes me feel like 855 00:39:43,221 --> 00:39:45,622 Speaker 2: So it's she they say on their marketing. You can 856 00:39:45,661 --> 00:39:47,542 Speaker 2: either wear it. You could wear it with a bare 857 00:39:47,582 --> 00:39:51,461 Speaker 2: face if you're like got gorgeous skin like Naomi What's 858 00:39:51,701 --> 00:39:53,502 Speaker 2: you could put it on a bare face and it 859 00:39:53,582 --> 00:39:55,582 Speaker 2: just gives you a bit of or you can put 860 00:39:55,582 --> 00:39:57,142 Speaker 2: it over foundation, or you can put it on halfway 861 00:39:57,142 --> 00:39:58,861 Speaker 2: through the day to kind of pick you up. Blah 862 00:39:58,862 --> 00:39:59,342 Speaker 2: blah blah. 863 00:39:59,342 --> 00:40:00,301 Speaker 3: And it's very much. 864 00:40:00,342 --> 00:40:04,302 Speaker 2: It's got a highlighter, yeah, and it's kind of glowy, 865 00:40:04,862 --> 00:40:06,381 Speaker 2: and it comes in quite a big pot, so it'll 866 00:40:06,462 --> 00:40:09,821 Speaker 2: lasts your long time. But it is expensive. It's seventy bucks, okay, right, 867 00:40:10,102 --> 00:40:11,661 Speaker 2: and they come in all these different shades. And then 868 00:40:11,701 --> 00:40:14,142 Speaker 2: at the moment if you're shipping that, like my shipping 869 00:40:14,221 --> 00:40:16,342 Speaker 2: was about fifteen dollars, but if you'd spent loads of 870 00:40:16,382 --> 00:40:18,502 Speaker 2: money you get free shipping obviously. But anyway, I really 871 00:40:18,622 --> 00:40:21,382 Speaker 2: like it, So I'm putting that butt because I know 872 00:40:21,502 --> 00:40:23,741 Speaker 2: that's a lot of money. There is also lots of 873 00:40:23,822 --> 00:40:26,301 Speaker 2: dupes of it because it's become really famous and fantastic. 874 00:40:26,382 --> 00:40:30,022 Speaker 2: So you can also buy Revolution Balm Glow and you 875 00:40:30,022 --> 00:40:31,902 Speaker 2: can buy that in lots of shades too, at like 876 00:40:31,982 --> 00:40:35,222 Speaker 2: a price line, and it's very similar, a very similar product. 877 00:40:35,221 --> 00:40:36,542 Speaker 2: There are quite a few of them now, but this 878 00:40:36,582 --> 00:40:38,422 Speaker 2: is the one that everyone says is the best, and 879 00:40:38,462 --> 00:40:40,381 Speaker 2: you can get that at price line. Revolution do really 880 00:40:40,382 --> 00:40:42,622 Speaker 2: good things. I love the highlighter and that is literally 881 00:40:42,661 --> 00:40:44,582 Speaker 2: fourteen bucks and in fact it's on so at the 882 00:40:44,582 --> 00:40:46,341 Speaker 2: minute for nine dollars. So there you go, and you 883 00:40:46,342 --> 00:40:49,062 Speaker 2: can probably does Becker Bloom have a dupe version of 884 00:40:49,102 --> 00:40:52,261 Speaker 2: a van plet van rpels thrice around the neck chain? 885 00:40:52,822 --> 00:40:55,221 Speaker 2: I don't think so, Amelia. 886 00:40:55,302 --> 00:40:56,301 Speaker 3: What's your recommendation? 887 00:40:56,701 --> 00:41:00,342 Speaker 1: Okay? So mine is a thing called a laughing yoga. 888 00:41:00,661 --> 00:41:03,582 Speaker 3: It just doesn't seem that you are a million no, I've. 889 00:41:03,422 --> 00:41:05,062 Speaker 1: Got like a real hippie street. 890 00:41:06,181 --> 00:41:06,381 Speaker 2: Yeah. 891 00:41:08,181 --> 00:41:11,702 Speaker 1: Okay. So it's done in my neighborhood by a lovely 892 00:41:11,822 --> 00:41:15,022 Speaker 1: lady named Timoco. But you can look up places to 893 00:41:15,221 --> 00:41:19,102 Speaker 1: practice it across Australia on the laughing yoga website Laughter 894 00:41:19,181 --> 00:41:23,982 Speaker 1: Yoga Dash Australia dot org has classes. Basically, it's not 895 00:41:24,022 --> 00:41:26,782 Speaker 1: really yoga at all. You stand around in a circle 896 00:41:27,102 --> 00:41:31,542 Speaker 1: and you basically just laugh together. You do various exercises 897 00:41:31,582 --> 00:41:33,421 Speaker 1: that are meant to trigger laughter. But the good news 898 00:41:33,502 --> 00:41:36,301 Speaker 1: is that fake laughter and real laughter actually have the 899 00:41:36,302 --> 00:41:38,701 Speaker 1: same effects on the body. Basically, they're a form of 900 00:41:38,701 --> 00:41:40,701 Speaker 1: breath work. Like laughter is a form of breath work. 901 00:41:40,701 --> 00:41:43,661 Speaker 1: You're taking in a whole ton of oxygen and then 902 00:41:43,701 --> 00:41:45,462 Speaker 1: that's calming down your nervous system. 903 00:41:45,942 --> 00:41:48,821 Speaker 2: So there's a group of I'm assuming mostly women, maybe 904 00:41:48,822 --> 00:41:50,262 Speaker 2: not standing in a circle. 905 00:41:50,342 --> 00:41:51,742 Speaker 1: I did take my partner along. 906 00:41:51,942 --> 00:41:54,622 Speaker 2: Do you tell jokes like how do they like laugh? 907 00:41:55,502 --> 00:41:57,261 Speaker 2: How do you have a comedian like? 908 00:41:57,342 --> 00:41:59,622 Speaker 1: How so, for instance, one of them is you go 909 00:41:59,781 --> 00:42:03,582 Speaker 1: ha ha ha ha ha. Because you're all doing it 910 00:42:03,622 --> 00:42:06,421 Speaker 1: in this sort of circle together, it feels really silly. 911 00:42:06,502 --> 00:42:08,661 Speaker 1: I took my partner and my best friend, and then 912 00:42:09,062 --> 00:42:12,462 Speaker 1: we just felt so silly we just actually started laughing. 913 00:42:12,942 --> 00:42:15,502 Speaker 1: And then by the end, laughter it it is contagious 914 00:42:15,622 --> 00:42:18,142 Speaker 1: and it is sort of generative, like it builds on itself. 915 00:42:18,142 --> 00:42:20,181 Speaker 1: So by the end you're practically hysterical and there are 916 00:42:20,221 --> 00:42:23,261 Speaker 1: tears rolling down your face. And it's true that afterwards 917 00:42:23,261 --> 00:42:26,701 Speaker 1: you feel incredibly calm because you're just taking in all 918 00:42:26,781 --> 00:42:28,701 Speaker 1: this good oxygen and you didn't even have to do 919 00:42:28,741 --> 00:42:29,461 Speaker 1: a downward dog. 920 00:42:29,622 --> 00:42:30,982 Speaker 2: Ha ha ha ha. 921 00:42:32,342 --> 00:42:34,582 Speaker 3: I like that as an idea. I like that a 922 00:42:34,622 --> 00:42:35,582 Speaker 3: lot more than breathwork. 923 00:42:35,862 --> 00:42:37,742 Speaker 1: Yeah, and I like a lot more than actual yoga 924 00:42:37,781 --> 00:42:39,142 Speaker 1: because it doesn't involve corse strength. 925 00:42:39,261 --> 00:42:41,102 Speaker 2: Do you have to do any bending around and stuff? 926 00:42:41,342 --> 00:42:43,781 Speaker 1: You don't. You just start in this circle and you 927 00:42:43,822 --> 00:42:45,741 Speaker 1: don't even really need to wear yoga clothes for it, 928 00:42:45,781 --> 00:42:47,261 Speaker 1: because again, you're not moving that much. 929 00:42:47,342 --> 00:42:48,982 Speaker 2: Don't have to wear soft pants, you don't. 930 00:42:49,261 --> 00:42:51,622 Speaker 1: This class was followed by a sound bath, which was 931 00:42:51,661 --> 00:42:54,941 Speaker 1: also lovely, where you lie down and the practitioner uses 932 00:42:55,022 --> 00:42:57,861 Speaker 1: various singing bowls to create great sound frequencies that are 933 00:42:57,902 --> 00:42:59,622 Speaker 1: meant to hum along with your body. But you don't 934 00:42:59,622 --> 00:43:01,181 Speaker 1: have to do that. You can also just walk away 935 00:43:01,181 --> 00:43:03,542 Speaker 1: from it and feel amazing and relaxed. 936 00:43:03,701 --> 00:43:09,181 Speaker 3: Okay, that's amazing. I am recommending a drama on Netflix 937 00:43:09,221 --> 00:43:13,221 Speaker 3: call Hostel with a lot of the out louders have 938 00:43:13,302 --> 00:43:14,502 Speaker 3: messaged me about. 939 00:43:16,062 --> 00:43:22,861 Speaker 2: If it ever comes down to a choice, you'll make 940 00:43:22,902 --> 00:43:24,461 Speaker 2: the right one. 941 00:43:26,181 --> 00:43:28,302 Speaker 1: You can't allow the French to dictate terms. 942 00:43:28,942 --> 00:43:31,022 Speaker 2: You were meant to be the politician people could trust her. 943 00:43:31,622 --> 00:43:38,341 Speaker 2: Nothing will distract me. Prime Minister for your husband has 944 00:43:38,342 --> 00:43:39,502 Speaker 2: been abducted. 945 00:43:41,022 --> 00:43:45,622 Speaker 1: Abil you need to resign this prime minister by tomorrow. 946 00:43:48,422 --> 00:43:50,582 Speaker 3: I scrolled past it the first few times, and then 947 00:43:50,701 --> 00:43:54,341 Speaker 3: I even read the synopsis and went, yeah, just kind 948 00:43:54,382 --> 00:43:56,582 Speaker 3: of didn't grab me. Gave it ten minutes totally in 949 00:43:56,982 --> 00:44:00,861 Speaker 3: It stars Saran Jones. She's this British actress who's in 950 00:44:00,902 --> 00:44:02,062 Speaker 3: every British crime show. 951 00:44:02,142 --> 00:44:06,142 Speaker 2: She's particularly an everything tense. Yeah, it's like she specializes, 952 00:44:06,781 --> 00:44:09,302 Speaker 2: you know, intense things. Since which was the one. 953 00:44:09,102 --> 00:44:12,462 Speaker 3: The Summer Green show it was called vigils Enough that 954 00:44:12,582 --> 00:44:15,661 Speaker 3: was so so good. The premise is basically that she 955 00:44:15,781 --> 00:44:18,982 Speaker 3: is the UK Prime Minister and her husband is a 956 00:44:19,261 --> 00:44:23,622 Speaker 3: doctor who is working overseas and he is captured and 957 00:44:23,661 --> 00:44:27,182 Speaker 3: held hostage, and it's about why these people are angry, 958 00:44:27,342 --> 00:44:32,622 Speaker 3: what they want. Julie Delpi plays the President of France Swoon, 959 00:44:32,862 --> 00:44:36,622 Speaker 3: who's also blackmailed, and she is before sunset. I've got 960 00:44:36,622 --> 00:44:37,261 Speaker 3: a watch all of them. 961 00:44:38,902 --> 00:44:41,622 Speaker 2: So heaven. And I know this is a sidebar because 962 00:44:41,622 --> 00:44:44,821 Speaker 2: I'm watching this too, Jesse. Watching these two women in 963 00:44:44,862 --> 00:44:47,582 Speaker 2: these really powerhouse roles is great. But Julie Delpi seeing her, 964 00:44:47,622 --> 00:44:49,462 Speaker 2: I have not think I'd seen her much lately. No 965 00:44:49,661 --> 00:44:53,902 Speaker 2: she looks amazing sidebar, but she looks amazing, French cool, 966 00:44:54,221 --> 00:44:57,062 Speaker 2: the red lip, the red limp, fantastic. She and the 967 00:44:57,181 --> 00:44:59,461 Speaker 2: tension between them and the story about her so good. 968 00:44:59,661 --> 00:45:03,102 Speaker 3: It's great, And at no point is it even referenced 969 00:45:03,221 --> 00:45:05,822 Speaker 3: or explored that they both happen to be female world leaders. 970 00:45:05,822 --> 00:45:06,381 Speaker 1: It just is. 971 00:45:06,582 --> 00:45:08,982 Speaker 3: It is such a good show. Really enjoyed it, and 972 00:45:08,982 --> 00:45:11,422 Speaker 3: it's a mini It's five episodes, so it doesn't drag 973 00:45:11,462 --> 00:45:12,741 Speaker 3: on non really good. 974 00:45:12,862 --> 00:45:14,261 Speaker 2: Can I ask you a question This is not a 975 00:45:14,261 --> 00:45:16,622 Speaker 2: spoiler's question, but so I'm an episode at the end 976 00:45:16,622 --> 00:45:18,542 Speaker 2: of episode four, I've got one left, but I have 977 00:45:18,582 --> 00:45:19,902 Speaker 2: to wait till I get home because Brent and I 978 00:45:19,982 --> 00:45:23,662 Speaker 2: are watching it. Is the ending satisfying? Did they stick 979 00:45:23,741 --> 00:45:24,342 Speaker 2: the landing? 980 00:45:24,942 --> 00:45:28,942 Speaker 3: I found it's satisfying. Yes, But I would love to 981 00:45:28,982 --> 00:45:31,221 Speaker 3: talk to people about the end of episode one. It 982 00:45:31,302 --> 00:45:34,301 Speaker 3: just starts conversations between you and your partner where you 983 00:45:34,342 --> 00:45:36,501 Speaker 3: look at each other and you go, hang on, would 984 00:45:36,502 --> 00:45:37,181 Speaker 3: you quit your job? 985 00:45:37,382 --> 00:45:38,422 Speaker 1: Yes? Save my life? 986 00:45:38,542 --> 00:45:40,661 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's an interesting conversation. 987 00:45:41,342 --> 00:45:43,261 Speaker 2: A massive thank you to all of you out loud 988 00:45:43,261 --> 00:45:45,381 Speaker 2: As for being here with us this week. We do 989 00:45:45,502 --> 00:45:47,901 Speaker 2: appreciate you, and to our fabulous team. Of course we're 990 00:45:47,902 --> 00:45:51,102 Speaker 2: putting it together. Oh a reminder, if you'd like to 991 00:45:51,142 --> 00:45:53,181 Speaker 2: watch us as well as listen to us, we do 992 00:45:53,302 --> 00:45:55,781 Speaker 2: all look spiffing today, don't we yea, and you can 993 00:45:55,862 --> 00:46:00,022 Speaker 2: check out my blowy cheeks exactly right. Then, Remember that 994 00:46:00,062 --> 00:46:02,022 Speaker 2: our episodes are all now on YouTube and you can 995 00:46:02,062 --> 00:46:04,821 Speaker 2: actually watch them anytime. Just go in there look for 996 00:46:04,862 --> 00:46:06,382 Speaker 2: Mama and me are out loud. You'll find it. We 997 00:46:06,502 --> 00:46:09,462 Speaker 2: brush our hair, Jesse and Amelia reather out. 998 00:46:09,822 --> 00:46:12,701 Speaker 3: A big thank you to our team group executive producer 999 00:46:12,902 --> 00:46:18,741 Speaker 3: Ruth Devine, executive producers Emmeline Gazillis and Sasha tanic As. 1000 00:46:18,781 --> 00:46:22,622 Speaker 1: Senior audio producer is Leah Porge's video producer Josh Green, 1001 00:46:22,741 --> 00:46:26,461 Speaker 1: and our junior content producers are Coco and Tessa. 1002 00:46:25,902 --> 00:46:28,661 Speaker 3: Out loud as We know you're not ready to say goodbye. 1003 00:46:28,741 --> 00:46:31,542 Speaker 3: And we have a subscriber episode that we did yesterday 1004 00:46:31,582 --> 00:46:35,542 Speaker 3: which is all about family drama and if you could 1005 00:46:35,542 --> 00:46:38,582 Speaker 3: cut off your parents completely. It is a dilemma that 1006 00:46:38,701 --> 00:46:40,022 Speaker 3: was sent in from a listener. 1007 00:46:40,142 --> 00:46:41,462 Speaker 2: It is would you yes or no? 1008 00:46:43,622 --> 00:46:45,822 Speaker 3: You can listen via the link in our show notes. 1009 00:46:46,542 --> 00:46:49,462 Speaker 2: Jesse, I also want to tell all the out Louders 1010 00:46:49,502 --> 00:46:52,341 Speaker 2: about the extra episode of No Filter that dropped last 1011 00:46:52,382 --> 00:46:56,181 Speaker 2: week where you interview an amazing guy called Dr Muhammad 1012 00:46:56,221 --> 00:46:58,822 Speaker 2: Mustafa or Dr Moe as he's called kind of everywhere 1013 00:46:58,862 --> 00:47:02,701 Speaker 2: because he's a doctor from Western Australia and he has 1014 00:47:02,741 --> 00:47:06,222 Speaker 2: been over to Gaza twice since the war volunteering working 1015 00:47:06,221 --> 00:47:10,662 Speaker 2: in hospitals, particularly with children. So he's got this mission, 1016 00:47:10,741 --> 00:47:13,261 Speaker 2: I guess might be the right word, to establish a 1017 00:47:13,342 --> 00:47:16,542 Speaker 2: children's hospital in Gaza, a mobile children's hospital, and he 1018 00:47:16,582 --> 00:47:19,542 Speaker 2: wants it to be separate from government, separate from politics, 1019 00:47:19,582 --> 00:47:22,301 Speaker 2: and he's really pushing hard for that. I just thought 1020 00:47:22,302 --> 00:47:25,221 Speaker 2: it was an amazing conversation. I thought Dr Moe was 1021 00:47:25,261 --> 00:47:28,341 Speaker 2: so interesting and it's also that's also on YouTube if 1022 00:47:28,382 --> 00:47:29,582 Speaker 2: you want to watch it rather than. 1023 00:47:29,502 --> 00:47:32,902 Speaker 3: Listen, shout out to any Mum and mea subscribers listening. 1024 00:47:33,142 --> 00:47:35,301 Speaker 3: If you love the show and you want to support us, 1025 00:47:35,542 --> 00:47:38,462 Speaker 3: subscribing to MoMA Mia is the very best way to 1026 00:47:38,542 --> 00:47:40,942 Speaker 3: do so. There's a link in the episode description