1 00:00:10,327 --> 00:00:13,047 Speaker 1: You're listening to a Muma mea podcast. 2 00:00:13,727 --> 00:00:16,767 Speaker 2: Mama Meyer acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters 3 00:00:16,807 --> 00:00:18,647 Speaker 2: that this podcast is recorded. 4 00:00:18,247 --> 00:00:19,807 Speaker 1: On on the road. Again. 5 00:00:20,407 --> 00:00:25,687 Speaker 3: We are going on five, let's stop her from singing. 6 00:00:26,007 --> 00:00:30,367 Speaker 4: Out Louders who follow us Instagram or on Facebook might 7 00:00:30,407 --> 00:00:32,967 Speaker 4: have seen that. Yeah, we announced that the mum me 8 00:00:33,047 --> 00:00:35,687 Speaker 4: are out Loud twenty twenty five. All or Nothing to Us, 9 00:00:35,727 --> 00:00:39,367 Speaker 4: presented by Nivius Cellular is happening. 10 00:00:39,527 --> 00:00:40,927 Speaker 2: It's happening. 11 00:00:41,287 --> 00:00:44,167 Speaker 1: We are going to be coming to some places on 12 00:00:44,207 --> 00:00:44,807 Speaker 1: some dates. 13 00:00:45,047 --> 00:00:46,527 Speaker 5: Oh my god, it's still a secret. 14 00:00:46,847 --> 00:00:50,127 Speaker 1: I'm not good at secrets, which is why I'm given 15 00:00:50,407 --> 00:00:51,447 Speaker 1: very little information. 16 00:00:51,767 --> 00:00:54,167 Speaker 2: They're all in May. The dates just so you can 17 00:00:54,327 --> 00:00:56,527 Speaker 2: you know that save the date, our dear clear calend. 18 00:00:56,527 --> 00:01:00,767 Speaker 2: They're just clean. If you're an out louder, all of it, 19 00:01:00,807 --> 00:01:02,687 Speaker 2: I promise only for a couple more hours. 20 00:01:03,007 --> 00:01:05,887 Speaker 1: If you live somewhere, don't be busy in May. 21 00:01:06,167 --> 00:01:08,087 Speaker 4: To be the first to know, make sure you sign 22 00:01:08,127 --> 00:01:10,007 Speaker 4: up to the out Louders News via the link in 23 00:01:10,047 --> 00:01:13,367 Speaker 4: the show notes for early access to tickets and all 24 00:01:13,367 --> 00:01:15,047 Speaker 4: the information you will need. 25 00:01:18,607 --> 00:01:21,407 Speaker 2: Hello and welcome to Mama Mia out Loud. It is 26 00:01:21,447 --> 00:01:24,327 Speaker 2: what women are actually talking about today, which is Monday, 27 00:01:24,407 --> 00:01:27,287 Speaker 2: the second of December. And I am Hollywayin Wright, I'm 28 00:01:27,327 --> 00:01:31,327 Speaker 2: mea Friedman, and I'm Jesse Stevens. Welcome to Sagittary's season. 29 00:01:31,367 --> 00:01:37,527 Speaker 4: Everybody is how many sleeps to my birthday? 30 00:01:37,527 --> 00:01:39,887 Speaker 2: About twenty year and all the December babies who are 31 00:01:39,927 --> 00:01:41,847 Speaker 2: like no one gives a shit about our birthdays, We've 32 00:01:41,847 --> 00:01:42,687 Speaker 2: got you anyway. 33 00:01:42,807 --> 00:01:45,807 Speaker 1: I'm really inconvenient. I have one of my own and 34 00:01:45,887 --> 00:01:48,567 Speaker 1: I'm not thrilled about having to do Christmas and birthday 35 00:01:48,647 --> 00:01:51,567 Speaker 1: and you too. It's too much. It's a big month anyway. 36 00:01:51,927 --> 00:01:56,207 Speaker 2: On the show today, if you thought extravagant debutante balls 37 00:01:56,247 --> 00:02:00,127 Speaker 2: were a bridgeton thing, Gwyneth Paltrow wants you to hold 38 00:02:00,127 --> 00:02:03,767 Speaker 2: her beer or her champagne as the case. Maybe. Also, 39 00:02:03,967 --> 00:02:05,967 Speaker 2: is bringing a new baby into the office a form 40 00:02:06,007 --> 00:02:10,767 Speaker 2: of psychological harassment? We discuss the new rules of workplace 41 00:02:10,847 --> 00:02:14,927 Speaker 2: safety and the anatomy of a rumor. The Harry and 42 00:02:14,967 --> 00:02:18,847 Speaker 2: Meghan divorce headlines have been pushed into unstoppable motion. But 43 00:02:19,007 --> 00:02:22,887 Speaker 2: why and how do you stop that damn countdown clock? 44 00:02:23,327 --> 00:02:27,207 Speaker 4: But first, in case you missed it, Australia's social media 45 00:02:27,247 --> 00:02:30,607 Speaker 4: ban is making headlines all over the world. 46 00:02:30,687 --> 00:02:35,447 Speaker 6: Well, while first in Australia, where Parliament there has given 47 00:02:35,487 --> 00:02:38,807 Speaker 6: a green light to a bill banning social media for 48 00:02:38,967 --> 00:02:40,887 Speaker 6: users under the age of sixteen. 49 00:02:41,287 --> 00:02:43,487 Speaker 1: I think it's good to have some sort of limitations 50 00:02:43,687 --> 00:02:45,847 Speaker 1: for younger kids because there's a lot of stuff online 51 00:02:46,247 --> 00:02:48,767 Speaker 1: which is quite dangerous and scary for young kids to see. 52 00:02:48,847 --> 00:02:50,207 Speaker 1: So I think it's good to have some sort of ban. 53 00:02:50,767 --> 00:02:52,487 Speaker 1: I don't know what would be the perfect age to 54 00:02:52,527 --> 00:02:53,887 Speaker 1: introduce people to social media. 55 00:02:54,087 --> 00:02:54,727 Speaker 2: It's good for. 56 00:02:55,287 --> 00:03:00,447 Speaker 1: These people in that age to knowld what's happening around 57 00:03:00,447 --> 00:03:00,767 Speaker 1: the world. 58 00:03:01,047 --> 00:03:04,567 Speaker 4: So on Thursday, the legislation that would ban any child 59 00:03:04,687 --> 00:03:07,527 Speaker 4: under the age of sixteen from using many social media 60 00:03:07,567 --> 00:03:11,687 Speaker 4: platforms officially passed through the Senate. The ban will come 61 00:03:11,727 --> 00:03:15,487 Speaker 4: into effect in late twenty twenty five. So the story 62 00:03:15,607 --> 00:03:19,367 Speaker 4: was covered everywhere from Russia to India to France, with 63 00:03:19,887 --> 00:03:21,847 Speaker 4: widespread support in the UK. 64 00:03:22,327 --> 00:03:24,287 Speaker 2: Everybody so excited about it. Are we the first with 65 00:03:24,327 --> 00:03:24,607 Speaker 2: the first? 66 00:03:24,687 --> 00:03:25,247 Speaker 5: We are the first? 67 00:03:25,367 --> 00:03:29,047 Speaker 4: So in France they do have a ban, except it 68 00:03:29,087 --> 00:03:31,447 Speaker 4: is between the parent and the child. It's not like 69 00:03:31,487 --> 00:03:34,207 Speaker 4: about tech companies, and that's under fifteen. This is the 70 00:03:34,247 --> 00:03:37,727 Speaker 4: oldest ban to have it at sixteen. In the UK, 71 00:03:38,047 --> 00:03:42,527 Speaker 4: the Technology Secretary said that they're looking at pursuing similar laws, 72 00:03:42,527 --> 00:03:44,767 Speaker 4: so they're watching very closely to be like we want 73 00:03:44,767 --> 00:03:45,047 Speaker 4: to do this. 74 00:03:45,167 --> 00:03:47,647 Speaker 1: I think the TAP's been turned on by Australia. 75 00:03:48,007 --> 00:03:50,887 Speaker 2: Yeah, we're like the test case kind of everyone's going, oh, 76 00:03:50,927 --> 00:03:51,647 Speaker 2: what's going to happen. 77 00:03:51,807 --> 00:03:56,007 Speaker 4: France's Education minister said the same. Several other European leaders 78 00:03:56,047 --> 00:03:58,487 Speaker 4: have also expressed interest in this age ban. 79 00:03:59,207 --> 00:04:01,087 Speaker 5: Elon Musk has something to say. 80 00:04:01,007 --> 00:04:05,687 Speaker 3: Oh, that's funny that he has been one of the 81 00:04:05,687 --> 00:04:09,207 Speaker 3: most outspoken critics, suggesting the ban is everything of everything, 82 00:04:09,767 --> 00:04:12,527 Speaker 3: that the ban is a backdoor way to control access 83 00:04:12,567 --> 00:04:14,167 Speaker 3: to the Internet by all Australians. 84 00:04:14,167 --> 00:04:15,407 Speaker 5: I don't even know what he means by that. 85 00:04:15,927 --> 00:04:19,967 Speaker 4: There was an interesting perspective offered by Will Guyett, who's 86 00:04:20,007 --> 00:04:23,647 Speaker 4: a tech journalist and former Facebook and Instagram employee, and 87 00:04:23,687 --> 00:04:25,967 Speaker 4: he said, I hadn't heard this before, that there's a 88 00:04:26,047 --> 00:04:29,727 Speaker 4: chance that social media companies will just abandon Australia. 89 00:04:29,847 --> 00:04:31,007 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what I wonder. 90 00:04:31,207 --> 00:04:34,927 Speaker 4: Yeah, So the law means that tech giants, so say Meta, 91 00:04:35,087 --> 00:04:38,647 Speaker 4: will face fifty million dollars worth of fines if they 92 00:04:38,687 --> 00:04:42,727 Speaker 4: do not take reasonable steps to keep children off these platforms. 93 00:04:42,807 --> 00:04:45,647 Speaker 4: So the onus is on the tech giants, and he 94 00:04:45,767 --> 00:04:50,607 Speaker 4: explained that for these companies, Australia is a small, inconsequential market. 95 00:04:50,727 --> 00:04:52,127 Speaker 4: I don't care about Australia. 96 00:04:52,247 --> 00:04:55,167 Speaker 2: We are not the UI, don't have the population numbers 97 00:04:55,247 --> 00:04:56,487 Speaker 2: to may they did this. 98 00:04:56,407 --> 00:04:58,967 Speaker 1: Before because Australia was one of the first countries in 99 00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:02,727 Speaker 1: the world to say that Meta and the other tech 100 00:05:02,727 --> 00:05:05,607 Speaker 1: companies had to pay media companies to carry news and 101 00:05:05,647 --> 00:05:08,127 Speaker 1: so they just, you might remember, for a few days, 102 00:05:08,167 --> 00:05:12,567 Speaker 1: just shut off all access to news sites through their platforms. 103 00:05:12,647 --> 00:05:14,447 Speaker 4: And they can and that's what he's saying. There's nothing 104 00:05:14,767 --> 00:05:17,287 Speaker 4: stopping them from deciding that they're going to withdraw their 105 00:05:17,287 --> 00:05:20,567 Speaker 4: networks on that. Actually, I was listening to an Oxford 106 00:05:20,647 --> 00:05:24,607 Speaker 4: University professor say that there are also potential issues under 107 00:05:24,647 --> 00:05:29,727 Speaker 4: international law because there are real human rights implications. Australia 108 00:05:29,807 --> 00:05:31,807 Speaker 4: is a signatory to the UN Charter of the Rights 109 00:05:31,807 --> 00:05:33,727 Speaker 4: of the Child and young people have a right to 110 00:05:33,767 --> 00:05:36,847 Speaker 4: information and when sixty percent of young people in Australia 111 00:05:36,887 --> 00:05:39,687 Speaker 4: are getting their news from social media, then are we 112 00:05:40,607 --> 00:05:42,647 Speaker 4: depriving them of vital information? 113 00:05:43,007 --> 00:05:45,967 Speaker 2: Well, they can get information from other places, but I 114 00:05:45,967 --> 00:05:48,207 Speaker 2: don't know that necessarily being able to see whether your 115 00:05:48,207 --> 00:05:50,647 Speaker 2: mates are all gathering around the corner at Betty's house 116 00:05:50,647 --> 00:05:53,407 Speaker 2: on Snapchat is exactly what they have in mind when 117 00:05:53,407 --> 00:05:55,567 Speaker 2: they say the international human rights of the child. 118 00:05:55,727 --> 00:05:57,927 Speaker 5: No, it's very true, Holly. What do we actually know 119 00:05:58,007 --> 00:05:59,527 Speaker 5: about the plan? Well so far. 120 00:05:59,767 --> 00:06:03,167 Speaker 2: It's really interesting because everybody in my world is talking 121 00:06:03,167 --> 00:06:05,167 Speaker 2: about this because we all have kids who are on 122 00:06:05,167 --> 00:06:08,247 Speaker 2: that tween teen either CUSP or in the middle of it. 123 00:06:08,367 --> 00:06:11,887 Speaker 2: So how far into the social media they already are 124 00:06:12,047 --> 00:06:13,807 Speaker 2: and whether or not that can be pulled back is 125 00:06:13,887 --> 00:06:17,327 Speaker 2: kind of one topic of conversation, And then the other 126 00:06:17,487 --> 00:06:19,487 Speaker 2: is like, has this handed a lot of ammunition to 127 00:06:19,567 --> 00:06:22,287 Speaker 2: parents who didn't want to give their kids social media? 128 00:06:22,327 --> 00:06:23,887 Speaker 2: And that's kind of how I feel about it in 129 00:06:23,887 --> 00:06:27,167 Speaker 2: a way, because my son is going to high school 130 00:06:27,167 --> 00:06:29,207 Speaker 2: in the new year, and that's in our family within 131 00:06:29,287 --> 00:06:31,727 Speaker 2: the time when you do get a phone. This has 132 00:06:31,767 --> 00:06:34,767 Speaker 2: completely changed my thoughts about what will be on that 133 00:06:34,807 --> 00:06:38,007 Speaker 2: phone and what access he'll have, because in twelve months time, 134 00:06:38,207 --> 00:06:39,927 Speaker 2: if all social media is going to be made illegal 135 00:06:39,927 --> 00:06:42,287 Speaker 2: f under SIXTEENES, that gives me a really strong case 136 00:06:42,287 --> 00:06:44,567 Speaker 2: of being able to just say we're not starting it 137 00:06:44,567 --> 00:06:46,887 Speaker 2: we're not doing it. But to everybody who says, how's 138 00:06:46,887 --> 00:06:48,647 Speaker 2: it going to work, how's it going to work? We 139 00:06:48,727 --> 00:06:51,927 Speaker 2: don't know that yet right What we do know, as 140 00:06:51,967 --> 00:06:53,847 Speaker 2: you mentioned, Jesse, is it's not going to be up 141 00:06:53,847 --> 00:06:58,527 Speaker 2: to the government to design the literal mechanisms of how 142 00:06:58,567 --> 00:06:59,767 Speaker 2: you're going to tell whether or not the kids are 143 00:06:59,807 --> 00:07:01,927 Speaker 2: old enough. That's going to be up to the platforms. 144 00:07:02,367 --> 00:07:04,967 Speaker 2: The government are paying a company a lot of money 145 00:07:04,967 --> 00:07:07,047 Speaker 2: to run a lot of tests to see what's the 146 00:07:07,047 --> 00:07:10,167 Speaker 2: most effective way to age gate. I found this really 147 00:07:10,167 --> 00:07:13,367 Speaker 2: interesting at the minute. There are three different ways that 148 00:07:13,487 --> 00:07:16,487 Speaker 2: you can successfully agate because lots of information is educated 149 00:07:16,527 --> 00:07:18,887 Speaker 2: on the internet. One is age verification, which is the 150 00:07:18,887 --> 00:07:21,407 Speaker 2: obvious one, which is show me your ID and we 151 00:07:21,487 --> 00:07:24,367 Speaker 2: will verify it. This company is running all these tests 152 00:07:24,407 --> 00:07:26,927 Speaker 2: to see whether it's sophisticated enough to be able to 153 00:07:26,967 --> 00:07:30,607 Speaker 2: pick up fakes. Then the other way is age estimation, 154 00:07:30,887 --> 00:07:34,207 Speaker 2: which is a tool that analyze your biological and behavioral 155 00:07:34,247 --> 00:07:37,807 Speaker 2: mannerisms to guess your age. There are some obvious drawbacks 156 00:07:37,807 --> 00:07:40,927 Speaker 2: to this. As our faces get older, this expert says, 157 00:07:40,927 --> 00:07:43,767 Speaker 2: our voices get deeper, our hands change, and we get wrinkles, 158 00:07:44,127 --> 00:07:47,367 Speaker 2: not always, not always, that's a way too. It's a 159 00:07:47,447 --> 00:07:50,767 Speaker 2: kind of AI scan that decides, and the other is 160 00:07:50,847 --> 00:07:54,047 Speaker 2: age inference, which is a way that they can assume 161 00:07:54,087 --> 00:07:58,247 Speaker 2: your age based on other information like your online purchase history, 162 00:07:58,327 --> 00:08:02,447 Speaker 2: browser behavior, or online activity. They're like, oh, she's bought 163 00:08:02,527 --> 00:08:04,927 Speaker 2: some sensible sandals lately, she must be bid. 164 00:08:06,007 --> 00:08:09,647 Speaker 1: I buy so many fidget toys and also presents lunar 165 00:08:09,767 --> 00:08:11,767 Speaker 1: that you're going to be blocked out. I think I'm 166 00:08:11,767 --> 00:08:15,527 Speaker 1: going to definitely, you're an excited and my clothes I 167 00:08:15,647 --> 00:08:16,567 Speaker 1: dressed like a toddler. 168 00:08:16,807 --> 00:08:19,727 Speaker 2: So what Basically there are places running. All these trials 169 00:08:19,727 --> 00:08:21,607 Speaker 2: are going to trial, like a thousand kids here and 170 00:08:21,607 --> 00:08:23,087 Speaker 2: a thousand kids are there to work out what might 171 00:08:23,127 --> 00:08:25,247 Speaker 2: be the most effective ways, and then it's going to 172 00:08:25,247 --> 00:08:28,847 Speaker 2: be up to the actual social media platforms to implement it. 173 00:08:28,847 --> 00:08:30,167 Speaker 2: It's kind of fascinating. 174 00:08:36,287 --> 00:08:41,367 Speaker 1: The annual Labale de Debutante happened in Paris over the weekend, 175 00:08:41,567 --> 00:08:44,407 Speaker 1: and according to images all over Instagram, it was held 176 00:08:44,447 --> 00:08:49,607 Speaker 1: at the intersection of Bridgeton, Coldplay and Goop. Yes, Apple Martin, 177 00:08:49,887 --> 00:08:54,847 Speaker 1: that's my favorite play twenty secs Where lives. Apple's the 178 00:08:54,927 --> 00:08:57,487 Speaker 1: daughter of Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow and she is 179 00:08:57,647 --> 00:09:01,127 Speaker 1: entering her debutante era, which you may not have known 180 00:09:01,167 --> 00:09:03,487 Speaker 1: is still a thing in twenty twenty four, but oh, 181 00:09:03,567 --> 00:09:07,207 Speaker 1: how wrong you'd be. Here are the basics. It is 182 00:09:07,327 --> 00:09:11,887 Speaker 1: an annual fashion event really that introduces about twenty women 183 00:09:11,927 --> 00:09:15,807 Speaker 1: between the ages of sixteen and twenty two into society. 184 00:09:16,287 --> 00:09:19,687 Speaker 1: I don't really understand what society is, but it is 185 00:09:19,727 --> 00:09:24,047 Speaker 1: strictly by invitation only. You have to be personally selected 186 00:09:24,167 --> 00:09:27,967 Speaker 1: by a woman called Awfully Rennore, who invented a modern 187 00:09:28,047 --> 00:09:31,047 Speaker 1: version of the traditional old money habit of launching young 188 00:09:31,047 --> 00:09:34,247 Speaker 1: women into society that has been made famous in Bridgeston. 189 00:09:34,767 --> 00:09:37,687 Speaker 1: Girls are selected on things like let's be honest, power 190 00:09:38,047 --> 00:09:41,527 Speaker 1: and money an appearance. An appearance, Yes, they have to 191 00:09:41,567 --> 00:09:44,647 Speaker 1: be hot, rich, usually old money. 192 00:09:44,727 --> 00:09:48,367 Speaker 4: There's a criteria for the invitation. The criteria is attractive 193 00:09:48,367 --> 00:09:52,487 Speaker 4: in appearance, intelligence and famous parents. They're the three things. 194 00:09:52,527 --> 00:09:55,887 Speaker 1: They can be famous. They're often famous in the form 195 00:09:56,127 --> 00:09:58,607 Speaker 1: of because a lot of these girls are either the 196 00:09:58,967 --> 00:10:02,567 Speaker 1: daughters of royalty. They might have titles themselves. 197 00:10:02,367 --> 00:10:04,367 Speaker 4: Politics, entertainment, business. 198 00:10:04,487 --> 00:10:08,487 Speaker 1: Well, mostly it's not just a celebrity event. It's interesting 199 00:10:08,527 --> 00:10:13,047 Speaker 1: because every year there are a couple of honorary debs 200 00:10:13,607 --> 00:10:16,767 Speaker 1: who are basically the kids of famous people. So this 201 00:10:16,847 --> 00:10:19,647 Speaker 1: year it was Apple Martin and Lucia Ponti, who is 202 00:10:19,687 --> 00:10:23,407 Speaker 1: the granddaughter of the actress Sophia Lauren. And in the 203 00:10:23,447 --> 00:10:25,927 Speaker 1: past some of the NEPO babies that have been invited 204 00:10:26,007 --> 00:10:30,167 Speaker 1: include Lily Collins, Margaret Quali, Ava Philippe, who is the 205 00:10:30,247 --> 00:10:33,727 Speaker 1: daughter of Reese Witherspoon, and Scout Willis who is Demi 206 00:10:33,767 --> 00:10:37,127 Speaker 1: Moore and Bruce Willis's daughter. They've all made their deboos. Now, 207 00:10:37,807 --> 00:10:40,167 Speaker 1: this is just so wild to me. This has been 208 00:10:40,207 --> 00:10:42,927 Speaker 1: all over social media in the last twenty four hours. 209 00:10:43,487 --> 00:10:48,247 Speaker 1: And in France, the traditional deb ball started in nineteen 210 00:10:48,287 --> 00:10:52,047 Speaker 1: fifty seven apparently and ended in seventy three before twenty 211 00:10:52,127 --> 00:10:56,167 Speaker 1: years later or fore Lee reinvented it and its purpose 212 00:10:56,287 --> 00:10:59,607 Speaker 1: this is important is to raise money for charities to 213 00:10:59,687 --> 00:11:02,727 Speaker 1: help young women. And on the website before I throw 214 00:11:02,727 --> 00:11:07,527 Speaker 1: to you Holy too, its exactly to unpack. That's its justification, 215 00:11:08,367 --> 00:11:10,767 Speaker 1: it says on the websit. Of course, now, due to 216 00:11:10,847 --> 00:11:14,047 Speaker 1: Facebook and other social media, the debs need not make 217 00:11:14,087 --> 00:11:18,527 Speaker 1: their social debuts. LaBelle is rather the unforgettable moment of 218 00:11:18,607 --> 00:11:23,247 Speaker 1: their couture and media premieres couture, meaning the kind of 219 00:11:23,527 --> 00:11:28,007 Speaker 1: handmade fashion where dresses cost tens of thousands of dollars. 220 00:11:28,767 --> 00:11:33,127 Speaker 1: Apple wore a custom Valentino gown which Vogue reports took 221 00:11:33,247 --> 00:11:37,767 Speaker 1: seven hundred and fifty hours to make. Holly take it away. 222 00:11:37,847 --> 00:11:41,007 Speaker 1: These are your people, They're so not much fancy English people. 223 00:11:41,927 --> 00:11:44,327 Speaker 2: So the interesting thing about this is although it does 224 00:11:44,487 --> 00:11:47,367 Speaker 2: raise money for charity, this particular ball, it's actual purposes. 225 00:11:47,407 --> 00:11:49,807 Speaker 2: It's a PR event, right, So off Elly, who you 226 00:11:49,927 --> 00:11:53,687 Speaker 2: talked about before, she is a PR group And just 227 00:11:53,767 --> 00:11:56,967 Speaker 2: like think of Sylvie, my icon in Emily in Paris, 228 00:11:57,367 --> 00:12:00,327 Speaker 2: and she invented this ball in nineteen ninety four, as 229 00:12:00,367 --> 00:12:02,367 Speaker 2: you said, me as a means to be able to 230 00:12:02,407 --> 00:12:08,367 Speaker 2: basically PR luxury brands in France, so fashion houses, champagne, 231 00:12:08,567 --> 00:12:12,687 Speaker 2: jewelry hotels. So if you go and look at Labal's Instagram, 232 00:12:12,967 --> 00:12:15,607 Speaker 2: it's like the tag will be the Shangri La Paris 233 00:12:15,647 --> 00:12:18,407 Speaker 2: and this jewelry brand and dad, So it's become a 234 00:12:18,447 --> 00:12:20,767 Speaker 2: fashion event a lot of responses, She says. The reason 235 00:12:20,767 --> 00:12:24,007 Speaker 2: there are actually only twenty two girls maximum invited is 236 00:12:24,047 --> 00:12:26,567 Speaker 2: because there aren't enough coture gowns, like there are't enough 237 00:12:26,567 --> 00:12:29,567 Speaker 2: fashion houses for everyone to get one. Otherwise they don't 238 00:12:29,607 --> 00:12:31,007 Speaker 2: have to pay to go. They don't have to pay 239 00:12:31,007 --> 00:12:32,887 Speaker 2: for the dresses either of the girls. Everything on the 240 00:12:32,887 --> 00:12:37,447 Speaker 2: weekend is free. Right, It's literally a pr exercise. But 241 00:12:37,607 --> 00:12:41,727 Speaker 2: the genius of it is it mimics this old world 242 00:12:42,367 --> 00:12:45,247 Speaker 2: ritual that was a real thing, right, so debutantes, as 243 00:12:45,287 --> 00:12:48,567 Speaker 2: many people know, I'm sure, but in Britain it used 244 00:12:48,607 --> 00:12:50,767 Speaker 2: to be. And this is obviously what happens in Britain. 245 00:12:50,767 --> 00:12:53,367 Speaker 2: And at the beginning of the social season in the 246 00:12:53,407 --> 00:12:58,687 Speaker 2: northern summer, the aristocrat's latest batch of eligible daughters were 247 00:12:58,687 --> 00:13:01,727 Speaker 2: presented to the queen and they'd wear a white dress 248 00:13:01,927 --> 00:13:04,127 Speaker 2: and they'd all get presented to the Queen or the king. 249 00:13:04,167 --> 00:13:06,407 Speaker 2: But you know, Queen, by the time it stopped, they 250 00:13:06,527 --> 00:13:09,247 Speaker 2: get like a seal of approval. You've got a good family, 251 00:13:09,487 --> 00:13:12,847 Speaker 2: you're a pretty person. You're now out there, able to 252 00:13:13,047 --> 00:13:15,047 Speaker 2: be in the season, find yourself a husband, or to 253 00:13:15,087 --> 00:13:18,287 Speaker 2: meat market. It's a total meat market for the eligible 254 00:13:18,367 --> 00:13:20,447 Speaker 2: families of the high society. 255 00:13:20,607 --> 00:13:20,767 Speaker 1: Right. 256 00:13:21,327 --> 00:13:24,327 Speaker 2: That stopped in nineteen fifty eight, although they still go. 257 00:13:24,527 --> 00:13:26,927 Speaker 2: They've now haven't been blessed by the queen since then. 258 00:13:27,327 --> 00:13:30,287 Speaker 2: In that year when it was canceled. The Queen and 259 00:13:30,327 --> 00:13:32,767 Speaker 2: Prince Philip had to meet like fifteen hundred debs. Can 260 00:13:32,807 --> 00:13:35,847 Speaker 2: you imagine, Like that's its sort of origin, and the 261 00:13:35,927 --> 00:13:39,247 Speaker 2: idea was an ideal world. In that very first season, 262 00:13:39,607 --> 00:13:42,327 Speaker 2: posh lady would meet posh man and get married. If 263 00:13:42,327 --> 00:13:44,607 Speaker 2: you did like two or three seasons, you were considered 264 00:13:44,607 --> 00:13:46,167 Speaker 2: a little bit like old bread on. 265 00:13:46,127 --> 00:13:47,767 Speaker 1: The shelf, so like a dating Appeah. 266 00:13:47,807 --> 00:13:50,527 Speaker 2: So the origins of this, you know, the obvious reasons 267 00:13:50,567 --> 00:13:52,327 Speaker 2: why it's kind of been phased out, even though there 268 00:13:52,367 --> 00:13:55,207 Speaker 2: are lots of events like that in England still, including 269 00:13:55,207 --> 00:13:57,207 Speaker 2: one called the Queen Charlott's Ball where they all kind 270 00:13:57,247 --> 00:14:00,047 Speaker 2: of curtsey to her an effigy sort of thing. Anyway, 271 00:14:00,647 --> 00:14:03,927 Speaker 2: the genius of the Paris Ball is that they've taken 272 00:14:04,007 --> 00:14:06,887 Speaker 2: that idea, put it in the capital of high fashion, 273 00:14:07,327 --> 00:14:11,367 Speaker 2: tied it with capitalism, sold it to sold it to sponsors, 274 00:14:11,847 --> 00:14:14,807 Speaker 2: and now all the fancy people want to be in 275 00:14:14,887 --> 00:14:17,807 Speaker 2: it because actually, and the interesting thing about this to 276 00:14:17,927 --> 00:14:21,567 Speaker 2: me is the choice to do it. Yes, you already 277 00:14:21,607 --> 00:14:26,007 Speaker 2: listed all those celebrities who presumably felt it was something 278 00:14:26,007 --> 00:14:27,887 Speaker 2: that their daughters would have loved, and reading some of 279 00:14:27,927 --> 00:14:30,407 Speaker 2: the experiences from the debutantes say, it's amazing. It's like 280 00:14:30,447 --> 00:14:32,327 Speaker 2: being in the Princess Diaries. You know, you turn up 281 00:14:32,327 --> 00:14:35,567 Speaker 2: in Paris, You're like whisked around and dressed and glam 282 00:14:35,607 --> 00:14:37,367 Speaker 2: and it's all. I mean a lot of these people 283 00:14:37,447 --> 00:14:39,247 Speaker 2: probably live like that quite a bit of the time, 284 00:14:39,927 --> 00:14:41,807 Speaker 2: so they love that. But the choice to do it 285 00:14:41,887 --> 00:14:45,207 Speaker 2: is interesting because you would argue that in twenty twenty four, 286 00:14:46,007 --> 00:14:48,527 Speaker 2: being part of that super elite has never been uncooler 287 00:14:48,607 --> 00:14:51,247 Speaker 2: and more problematic. Right, So I was really surprised when 288 00:14:51,247 --> 00:14:54,207 Speaker 2: obviously I follow everything that my favorite Gwyneth does, and 289 00:14:54,247 --> 00:14:56,687 Speaker 2: when I saw this all over her Instagram, I was 290 00:14:56,767 --> 00:15:00,767 Speaker 2: really surprised. I can't believe a lot of time pretending 291 00:15:00,807 --> 00:15:01,567 Speaker 2: that they're normal. 292 00:15:01,767 --> 00:15:03,207 Speaker 5: See, I can't believe you're surprised. 293 00:15:03,607 --> 00:15:08,407 Speaker 4: I looked at it and went, interesting, choice, because people 294 00:15:08,487 --> 00:15:10,447 Speaker 4: are going to want hate you, and you saw the 295 00:15:10,487 --> 00:15:13,847 Speaker 4: internet do that very very quickly. You are standing in 296 00:15:13,887 --> 00:15:17,887 Speaker 4: a room of the established elite. These people are rich, 297 00:15:18,167 --> 00:15:20,807 Speaker 4: they're beautiful. You've been invited to this thing. You're in 298 00:15:20,847 --> 00:15:25,447 Speaker 4: this ball gown. Yeah, like that's not aspirational. People find 299 00:15:25,487 --> 00:15:28,687 Speaker 4: it generally irritating, But I think that when you are 300 00:15:28,807 --> 00:15:32,727 Speaker 4: in this like microcosmo when you're a member of the elite. 301 00:15:33,247 --> 00:15:34,647 Speaker 5: I don't think you have a sense of that. 302 00:15:34,847 --> 00:15:37,887 Speaker 4: I don't think you necessarily have a sense of those optics. 303 00:15:37,967 --> 00:15:40,127 Speaker 2: Quinnith would have a sense of it, but she leans 304 00:15:40,167 --> 00:15:42,927 Speaker 2: into it, right because she's always being accused of being 305 00:15:42,927 --> 00:15:44,927 Speaker 2: part of the elite, and like, look at you selling 306 00:15:44,967 --> 00:15:47,647 Speaker 2: your candles for two hundred dollars, look at you with 307 00:15:47,727 --> 00:15:50,687 Speaker 2: your double spa and your boyfriend breakfast and blah blah. 308 00:15:50,927 --> 00:15:53,807 Speaker 2: But it's interesting that you would choose to lean to 309 00:15:54,487 --> 00:15:57,247 Speaker 2: in particularly even now in the current climate. 310 00:15:57,367 --> 00:15:59,167 Speaker 4: Well I read I think it was a tweet or 311 00:15:59,167 --> 00:16:02,047 Speaker 4: something that said, is the dead ball making a comeback? 312 00:16:02,207 --> 00:16:05,727 Speaker 4: High fashion, the dating world's a cesspool, and marriage is aspirational. 313 00:16:05,767 --> 00:16:08,167 Speaker 5: Again, I was like, maybe it's like a gen Z 314 00:16:08,367 --> 00:16:09,447 Speaker 5: thing that it may. 315 00:16:09,567 --> 00:16:12,247 Speaker 1: It's so uncool that it's cool. Because I was also 316 00:16:12,327 --> 00:16:14,487 Speaker 1: shocked for the same reasons that you a whole. 317 00:16:14,527 --> 00:16:16,007 Speaker 2: What shocked me more. 318 00:16:17,287 --> 00:16:19,247 Speaker 1: Was Chris Martin being part of it. 319 00:16:19,367 --> 00:16:21,727 Speaker 2: Right, so Dad has to dance with you. It's very long. 320 00:16:21,847 --> 00:16:25,407 Speaker 1: Yeah, so he was there, Moses the brother was there. 321 00:16:26,047 --> 00:16:30,047 Speaker 1: It's very I mean patriarchal, sort of doesn't even begin. 322 00:16:30,607 --> 00:16:34,847 Speaker 1: It's like all of these young women who all conform 323 00:16:34,967 --> 00:16:39,687 Speaker 1: to a certain beauty standard, who are all, as we said, 324 00:16:39,767 --> 00:16:42,767 Speaker 1: like the one percent of the one percent, who were 325 00:16:42,807 --> 00:16:48,167 Speaker 1: then matched with some random high falutin guy. Not only 326 00:16:48,247 --> 00:16:51,447 Speaker 1: does it feel tone deaf, I always look for the 327 00:16:51,447 --> 00:16:54,927 Speaker 1: most charitable interpretation, right, So I'm like, benefit of the doubt. Okay, 328 00:16:55,327 --> 00:16:57,327 Speaker 1: so it doesn't cost anything to be part of it. 329 00:16:58,167 --> 00:17:00,007 Speaker 1: You get it all for free, which I didn't realize. 330 00:17:00,007 --> 00:17:00,887 Speaker 5: And you're raising money. 331 00:17:00,967 --> 00:17:02,087 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's clear how the. 332 00:17:02,007 --> 00:17:02,847 Speaker 1: Money's been raised. 333 00:17:02,887 --> 00:17:05,927 Speaker 2: There is a charitable element, no question. I imagine that 334 00:17:06,007 --> 00:17:08,647 Speaker 2: hefty donations are encouraged. I would hate. 335 00:17:08,807 --> 00:17:13,727 Speaker 5: Yes, it seems just very thirsty. 336 00:17:14,287 --> 00:17:16,407 Speaker 1: I understand, like, you know, it's nice to be on 337 00:17:16,487 --> 00:17:18,967 Speaker 1: a list of the most eligible women young women in 338 00:17:18,967 --> 00:17:23,447 Speaker 1: the world, Like that's cool. But by going and participating 339 00:17:23,967 --> 00:17:28,247 Speaker 1: in it all, it really says, yeah, we ascribe to 340 00:17:28,527 --> 00:17:33,287 Speaker 1: these values which value a young woman. It's not her achievements, 341 00:17:33,367 --> 00:17:35,767 Speaker 1: because she's between sixteen and twenty. She hasn't got the 342 00:17:35,847 --> 00:17:39,527 Speaker 1: achievements yet. It's not about her personality. It's not about 343 00:17:39,527 --> 00:17:43,127 Speaker 1: her intelligence, let's be clear, let's be honest. It's about 344 00:17:43,487 --> 00:17:47,167 Speaker 1: her connections and her eligibility for marriage. 345 00:17:47,447 --> 00:17:49,687 Speaker 4: Yes, I would imagine that it's approached as a little 346 00:17:49,687 --> 00:17:51,487 Speaker 4: bit of a networking event. There's a lot of power 347 00:17:51,487 --> 00:17:51,647 Speaker 4: in it. 348 00:17:51,807 --> 00:17:52,967 Speaker 1: Can you imagine that would be? 349 00:17:53,207 --> 00:17:55,407 Speaker 5: So then you go, okay, so you're. 350 00:17:55,287 --> 00:17:57,287 Speaker 1: One of the girls, and these none of these girls, 351 00:17:57,287 --> 00:17:59,727 Speaker 1: I imagine, would do it against their will, So like, oh, 352 00:17:59,807 --> 00:18:02,567 Speaker 1: maybe I'll meet some interesting people, I'll get a free dress, 353 00:18:02,607 --> 00:18:05,567 Speaker 1: I'll get to be a princess, which is fine, but 354 00:18:05,687 --> 00:18:08,127 Speaker 1: what surprises me? And I felt the same way about 355 00:18:08,407 --> 00:18:12,927 Speaker 1: Sunday Kidman Urban who walks the catwork for mew and 356 00:18:13,487 --> 00:18:16,447 Speaker 1: a few weeks ago. She's sixteen. Apple's a bit older. 357 00:18:16,487 --> 00:18:19,167 Speaker 1: She's twenty, So there is a difference there, but it's 358 00:18:19,207 --> 00:18:24,607 Speaker 1: still really exposing them to oh, just the horribleness of 359 00:18:24,647 --> 00:18:28,007 Speaker 1: the internet and public commentary. It's not about judging the 360 00:18:28,047 --> 00:18:31,647 Speaker 1: girls or judging whatever. But as mothers as Nicole Kidman 361 00:18:31,727 --> 00:18:36,927 Speaker 1: and Gwyneth Paltrow, who know what that kind of scrutiny brings. 362 00:18:37,567 --> 00:18:40,887 Speaker 1: When you hold yourself up as being part of this 363 00:18:41,007 --> 00:18:44,647 Speaker 1: beauty standard, as being part of the elite, you will 364 00:18:44,647 --> 00:18:47,447 Speaker 1: be attacked. And of course it's already happened there. You know, 365 00:18:47,447 --> 00:18:50,967 Speaker 1: there's a TikTok going round of Apple supposedly pushing another 366 00:18:50,967 --> 00:18:52,647 Speaker 1: girl out of the way to get a photo. When 367 00:18:52,647 --> 00:18:54,447 Speaker 1: you actually look at the video, that's not really what 368 00:18:54,527 --> 00:18:57,367 Speaker 1: was happening. But the Internet doesn't care about the truth. 369 00:18:57,407 --> 00:18:59,647 Speaker 1: It's like she's going to be demonized in the same 370 00:18:59,647 --> 00:19:04,647 Speaker 1: way Sunday Urban was attacked for not walking right, Like, 371 00:19:05,367 --> 00:19:08,967 Speaker 1: why would you want your daughter to be under. 372 00:19:08,727 --> 00:19:10,927 Speaker 4: That kind of a twenty year old I don't reckon 373 00:19:10,927 --> 00:19:13,287 Speaker 4: that you have any control over. These are women with 374 00:19:13,447 --> 00:19:16,847 Speaker 4: agency who are twenty like they if they want to 375 00:19:16,927 --> 00:19:18,967 Speaker 4: walk a catwalk, or if they want to turn up 376 00:19:18,967 --> 00:19:20,407 Speaker 4: to this, they're going to do it with or without 377 00:19:20,407 --> 00:19:23,087 Speaker 4: your blessing. Like I think that's just the case. But 378 00:19:23,127 --> 00:19:25,407 Speaker 4: I think it's also worth acknowledging the whole deb thing. 379 00:19:25,767 --> 00:19:27,687 Speaker 4: There are a lot of our listeners who are going, 380 00:19:27,807 --> 00:19:30,327 Speaker 4: I did my deb Like recently, I just stassed around 381 00:19:30,367 --> 00:19:32,967 Speaker 4: the office and interesting. 382 00:19:33,927 --> 00:19:36,647 Speaker 2: What's the Australian deb So it's, you know, British. 383 00:19:36,687 --> 00:19:38,047 Speaker 5: It's been handed down from. 384 00:19:39,407 --> 00:19:42,487 Speaker 4: Yes, but it is often in the country and often 385 00:19:42,527 --> 00:19:45,087 Speaker 4: public schools, so it's interesting that it's been divorced a 386 00:19:45,127 --> 00:19:47,887 Speaker 4: little bit from the aristocratic upper. 387 00:19:47,607 --> 00:19:50,247 Speaker 2: Class, kind of like a formal but yes. 388 00:19:50,367 --> 00:19:53,087 Speaker 4: So I was speaking to Grace here who year ten 389 00:19:53,167 --> 00:19:55,087 Speaker 4: and year twelve, You've got your formal you're eleven, you 390 00:19:55,127 --> 00:19:57,327 Speaker 4: have your deb and you learn a dance with a 391 00:19:57,327 --> 00:19:58,927 Speaker 4: boy and then you go and do it. It's like 392 00:19:58,967 --> 00:20:02,647 Speaker 4: a formalized and they all wear like white wedding dresses 393 00:20:02,687 --> 00:20:03,127 Speaker 4: and it is. 394 00:20:03,287 --> 00:20:04,607 Speaker 2: It's the traditional debutante. 395 00:20:04,727 --> 00:20:08,127 Speaker 4: Yeah, like being presented to society. So isn't I mean 396 00:20:08,167 --> 00:20:11,367 Speaker 4: that's what all Martin has done is just that on steroids. 397 00:20:11,407 --> 00:20:12,287 Speaker 1: Yeah, I was trying to go. 398 00:20:12,447 --> 00:20:14,487 Speaker 2: Isn't like a butt mitzvah, like. 399 00:20:14,447 --> 00:20:17,487 Speaker 1: The Jewish ritual of when a boy a girl as 400 00:20:17,487 --> 00:20:19,727 Speaker 1: abut mitzvah, boy as a bar mitzvah when they're about 401 00:20:19,727 --> 00:20:22,447 Speaker 1: twelve or thirteen. But that's different. That's kind of the 402 00:20:22,527 --> 00:20:26,367 Speaker 1: cusp of becoming a child to becoming an adult or 403 00:20:26,687 --> 00:20:28,807 Speaker 1: you know, not that you're an adult at twelve or thirteen, 404 00:20:28,887 --> 00:20:31,367 Speaker 1: but it's that's different to this. And then I'm like, 405 00:20:31,407 --> 00:20:33,967 Speaker 1: I think the thing it's most like is when clear 406 00:20:33,967 --> 00:20:36,967 Speaker 1: I used to do Australia's fifteen Most Eligible Bachelors and 407 00:20:37,167 --> 00:20:39,527 Speaker 1: used to have to used to say, oh, here are 408 00:20:39,527 --> 00:20:41,487 Speaker 1: the criteria, but it was actually just that they were 409 00:20:41,527 --> 00:20:43,887 Speaker 1: horsh I think it's like a beauty pageant, and you'll 410 00:20:43,927 --> 00:20:45,287 Speaker 1: take lots of sponsorship money. 411 00:20:45,407 --> 00:20:47,967 Speaker 4: Yeah, because beauty pageants also have a charitable element. 412 00:20:48,007 --> 00:20:50,127 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a lot like a beauty pageant, even in 413 00:20:50,167 --> 00:20:54,167 Speaker 2: the way. I was looking at the instagram Lebels Instagram 414 00:20:54,207 --> 00:20:56,047 Speaker 2: and it's like, as they run up to the event, 415 00:20:56,087 --> 00:20:58,367 Speaker 2: they post some of the girls, some of the young 416 00:20:58,367 --> 00:21:00,287 Speaker 2: women who it's going to be, and there was another 417 00:21:00,287 --> 00:21:03,407 Speaker 2: American young woman called Peyton, and it's like, here comes Peyton, 418 00:21:03,487 --> 00:21:07,927 Speaker 2: the American darling from San Francisco, selecting her dold Tangabana gown. 419 00:21:08,167 --> 00:21:11,487 Speaker 2: Labal celebrates excellence, the empowering of women, and the harmony 420 00:21:11,527 --> 00:21:14,487 Speaker 2: between this very like beauty pageant language, isn't it? 421 00:21:14,727 --> 00:21:17,887 Speaker 4: Did we think that Apple Martin was going to her 422 00:21:18,287 --> 00:21:20,727 Speaker 4: formal and getting shit faced like that was. 423 00:21:20,687 --> 00:21:23,207 Speaker 2: Not going to be a college right? And the thing 424 00:21:23,247 --> 00:21:26,447 Speaker 2: that's interesting to me again is this, I'm sure that 425 00:21:26,447 --> 00:21:29,487 Speaker 2: Apple Martin is a very intelligent, accomplished young person. How 426 00:21:29,527 --> 00:21:32,287 Speaker 2: could she not be right with all the opportunities she's 427 00:21:32,287 --> 00:21:34,687 Speaker 2: been afforded and brainy parents and all the rest of it. 428 00:21:35,207 --> 00:21:37,727 Speaker 2: But it just seems interesting to me that you would 429 00:21:37,767 --> 00:21:40,967 Speaker 2: so publicly step into this space not that it wouldn't 430 00:21:40,967 --> 00:21:43,367 Speaker 2: be amazing fun to do it, and in a way 431 00:21:43,447 --> 00:21:45,087 Speaker 2: me you know when you said, why would you expose 432 00:21:45,127 --> 00:21:46,727 Speaker 2: your kids to that kind of scrutiny? I guess if 433 00:21:46,727 --> 00:21:48,927 Speaker 2: you're worried about that, you'd never do anything right. You 434 00:21:49,127 --> 00:21:53,207 Speaker 2: just do no experiences, no opportunities, no risks because this 435 00:21:53,327 --> 00:21:55,887 Speaker 2: is so public. Yeah, it seems to be like an 436 00:21:55,887 --> 00:21:58,647 Speaker 2: open goal. I could read a carpet, so it's like going, 437 00:21:58,967 --> 00:22:01,687 Speaker 2: come at me, come have it. And Gwyneth does that, 438 00:22:01,847 --> 00:22:04,047 Speaker 2: She's done it before. She did it with a vagina candle. 439 00:22:04,087 --> 00:22:05,007 Speaker 2: She does it with a sex toy. 440 00:22:05,367 --> 00:22:06,127 Speaker 1: That's admirable. 441 00:22:06,487 --> 00:22:08,967 Speaker 2: Yeah, it just feels like another time. 442 00:22:09,367 --> 00:22:13,007 Speaker 1: After the break. Could seeing children in the workplace be traumatic? 443 00:22:23,807 --> 00:22:26,567 Speaker 4: I don't want to see babies in the office. That 444 00:22:26,727 --> 00:22:29,167 Speaker 4: was a gripe written into the Sydney Morning Herald advice 445 00:22:29,207 --> 00:22:33,087 Speaker 4: column last week. The dilemma concerned a woman who had 446 00:22:33,087 --> 00:22:37,287 Speaker 4: a history of failed IVF and multiple miscarriages, who was 447 00:22:37,327 --> 00:22:40,207 Speaker 4: coming to terms with not being able to have children, 448 00:22:40,287 --> 00:22:45,047 Speaker 4: which her workplace was aware of. She explained, last week 449 00:22:45,207 --> 00:22:47,967 Speaker 4: someone brought their baby into the office, which is fine, 450 00:22:48,207 --> 00:22:50,367 Speaker 4: but they stayed by my desk for half an hour 451 00:22:50,607 --> 00:22:53,407 Speaker 4: with the whole office gushing over the baby. I had 452 00:22:53,447 --> 00:22:55,927 Speaker 4: a panic attack because I felt I couldn't escape and 453 00:22:56,087 --> 00:22:59,287 Speaker 4: was overwhelmed with grief. She told her manager that she 454 00:22:59,327 --> 00:23:01,167 Speaker 4: did not want to be put in that situation again. 455 00:23:01,407 --> 00:23:04,567 Speaker 4: Her manager said that they are not able to guarantee 456 00:23:04,567 --> 00:23:08,607 Speaker 4: her request. Surely, she finished the letter, I am entitled 457 00:23:08,647 --> 00:23:12,327 Speaker 4: to feel safe at my desk. This dilemma is part 458 00:23:12,367 --> 00:23:15,567 Speaker 4: of a larger shift when it comes to human resources 459 00:23:15,607 --> 00:23:20,327 Speaker 4: departments in workplaces. Amy Gallo, who's a workplace expert, says 460 00:23:20,327 --> 00:23:24,847 Speaker 4: that while once the focus was primarily on physical safety 461 00:23:24,967 --> 00:23:29,087 Speaker 4: let's say, not getting injured fire drills, your ergonomic chair, 462 00:23:29,727 --> 00:23:33,167 Speaker 4: the focus is now on something called psychological safety. And 463 00:23:33,207 --> 00:23:36,807 Speaker 4: the definition of psychological safety is very important because it's 464 00:23:36,807 --> 00:23:39,367 Speaker 4: a shared belief that it's okay to take risks, to 465 00:23:39,487 --> 00:23:42,607 Speaker 4: express ideas and concerns, to speak up with questions, and 466 00:23:42,687 --> 00:23:47,487 Speaker 4: admit mistakes without fear or negative consequences. It's interesting that 467 00:23:47,487 --> 00:23:50,807 Speaker 4: that dilemma used the word safety. It said, I'm entitled 468 00:23:50,807 --> 00:23:52,007 Speaker 4: to feel safe at my desk. 469 00:23:52,567 --> 00:23:52,807 Speaker 2: Maya. 470 00:23:52,887 --> 00:23:54,167 Speaker 5: Do you think she has a point? 471 00:23:54,687 --> 00:23:58,007 Speaker 1: My heart breaks for her because I've been her, and 472 00:23:58,087 --> 00:24:04,007 Speaker 1: I know what it feels like to you know, Triggered 473 00:24:04,047 --> 00:24:06,927 Speaker 1: is a word that's used and ridiculed a lot, but 474 00:24:08,007 --> 00:24:11,407 Speaker 1: it can just add absolutely break your heart. It can, 475 00:24:12,047 --> 00:24:15,007 Speaker 1: so I don't want to dismiss her distress. I think 476 00:24:15,007 --> 00:24:18,727 Speaker 1: it's real do I think the onus is probably on 477 00:24:18,807 --> 00:24:22,167 Speaker 1: her to remove herself from that situation because it's just 478 00:24:22,247 --> 00:24:27,527 Speaker 1: not feasible for a workplace to protect you from everything 479 00:24:27,567 --> 00:24:30,367 Speaker 1: that you might feel is upsetting. It's not really possible 480 00:24:30,407 --> 00:24:33,807 Speaker 1: for anyone to do that. That's what makes grief and 481 00:24:33,887 --> 00:24:36,767 Speaker 1: trauma's so difficult and so challenging. You never know what's 482 00:24:36,807 --> 00:24:39,207 Speaker 1: going to trigger you, and you know you're in a workplace. 483 00:24:39,247 --> 00:24:41,967 Speaker 1: You wouldn't think that there would be babies there, but 484 00:24:42,007 --> 00:24:44,247 Speaker 1: that's an example of how there is. And I think 485 00:24:44,287 --> 00:24:47,247 Speaker 1: that that's a lovely thing for a lot of people 486 00:24:47,287 --> 00:24:50,727 Speaker 1: and an important thing. You know, as employers, when people 487 00:24:50,767 --> 00:24:54,687 Speaker 1: go on maternity leave, you want to encourage them to 488 00:24:54,687 --> 00:24:56,927 Speaker 1: be able because everyone wants to see the baby, and 489 00:24:57,207 --> 00:25:00,047 Speaker 1: you want to encourage them to not feel isolated and 490 00:25:00,087 --> 00:25:03,167 Speaker 1: cut off while they're at home. So, in that sense, 491 00:25:03,927 --> 00:25:08,167 Speaker 1: employers have a lot of conflicting responsibilities to a lot 492 00:25:08,207 --> 00:25:10,927 Speaker 1: of different people in the world workplace. I think the 493 00:25:11,007 --> 00:25:14,127 Speaker 1: idea of psychological safety is really interesting because we're hearing 494 00:25:14,167 --> 00:25:19,487 Speaker 1: it more and more in universities, in classrooms and in workplaces. 495 00:25:19,767 --> 00:25:24,807 Speaker 1: And I think it's this sense of we want our 496 00:25:25,007 --> 00:25:29,447 Speaker 1: workplace and anyone in a position of power to be 497 00:25:29,647 --> 00:25:33,687 Speaker 1: our protectors, like to be our parents, and I just 498 00:25:33,727 --> 00:25:36,047 Speaker 1: don't think that's possible. A lot of it's interested to 499 00:25:36,047 --> 00:25:37,487 Speaker 1: put on to outsource, you know. 500 00:25:37,767 --> 00:25:40,167 Speaker 4: I think that's the interpretation, and I don't think it's 501 00:25:40,167 --> 00:25:44,207 Speaker 4: actually what psychological safety means. Because to me, if you 502 00:25:44,487 --> 00:25:47,847 Speaker 4: are in a workplace where you felt safe or empowered 503 00:25:47,927 --> 00:25:50,287 Speaker 4: enough to say what this person managed to say to 504 00:25:50,327 --> 00:25:53,527 Speaker 4: her manager, which is I felt really uncomfortable, I think 505 00:25:53,607 --> 00:25:54,927 Speaker 4: you have psychological safety. 506 00:25:54,927 --> 00:25:58,247 Speaker 2: And what do you think psychological safety does mean. 507 00:25:58,607 --> 00:26:01,487 Speaker 4: It means that you feel like you can take risks, 508 00:26:02,007 --> 00:26:04,887 Speaker 4: that you feel supported, that people aren't out to get you, 509 00:26:05,287 --> 00:26:06,527 Speaker 4: that there's open. 510 00:26:08,047 --> 00:26:10,887 Speaker 2: To speak your mind, You feel like you're not going 511 00:26:10,927 --> 00:26:11,887 Speaker 2: to be victimized. 512 00:26:12,287 --> 00:26:12,527 Speaker 5: Yes. 513 00:26:12,687 --> 00:26:17,487 Speaker 4: Right, And there's really interesting caveats because they say it 514 00:26:17,527 --> 00:26:20,767 Speaker 4: doesn't mean you never feel uncomfortable, and it doesn't mean 515 00:26:21,127 --> 00:26:23,607 Speaker 4: you know you're never told you're wrong. In fact, it's 516 00:26:23,647 --> 00:26:26,727 Speaker 4: about having candor. If you're in a place where you 517 00:26:26,767 --> 00:26:30,127 Speaker 4: don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. That's often not psychologically 518 00:26:30,167 --> 00:26:33,527 Speaker 4: safe because a bully can get away with anything because 519 00:26:33,567 --> 00:26:35,527 Speaker 4: no one says, hey, the way you're talking to people 520 00:26:35,647 --> 00:26:39,567 Speaker 4: isn't appropriate or whatever. Like every workplace, there are going 521 00:26:39,607 --> 00:26:42,447 Speaker 4: to be feelings of discomfort, and in this like, I 522 00:26:42,487 --> 00:26:45,647 Speaker 4: think her speaking to a manager was actually a really 523 00:26:45,847 --> 00:26:48,567 Speaker 4: brave thing to do, and I would want to know 524 00:26:48,647 --> 00:26:50,927 Speaker 4: that because no one wants to intentionally hurt you. 525 00:26:51,207 --> 00:26:53,887 Speaker 2: Yeah, but it does put and I agree with you 526 00:26:54,087 --> 00:26:55,967 Speaker 2: that I think that that's great that she could do that. 527 00:26:56,007 --> 00:26:59,247 Speaker 2: But then what the manager then does with that. Sometimes 528 00:26:59,367 --> 00:27:03,727 Speaker 2: as a manager, you feel like your job is everybody 529 00:27:03,767 --> 00:27:05,927 Speaker 2: just brings you their little piles of poo. I do 530 00:27:06,247 --> 00:27:08,447 Speaker 2: when I say that, I don't mean that her no 531 00:27:08,527 --> 00:27:11,527 Speaker 2: particularly isn't valid or is a pile of pooh. But 532 00:27:11,567 --> 00:27:13,967 Speaker 2: what I mean is their problems, right, Yeah, everybody just 533 00:27:14,007 --> 00:27:16,367 Speaker 2: comes to you with all their problems. That person was 534 00:27:16,447 --> 00:27:18,847 Speaker 2: mean to me. I don't really like this part of 535 00:27:18,847 --> 00:27:21,327 Speaker 2: my job. I think I should get paid more. Someone 536 00:27:21,407 --> 00:27:23,327 Speaker 2: commented on my food in the kitchen, and now I 537 00:27:23,367 --> 00:27:25,847 Speaker 2: feel like they think I'm fat. So as a manager, 538 00:27:25,847 --> 00:27:28,447 Speaker 2: sometimes you feel like you're sitting at your desk with 539 00:27:28,567 --> 00:27:30,727 Speaker 2: just this big pile of poo, and you're like, how 540 00:27:30,767 --> 00:27:32,607 Speaker 2: do I I. 541 00:27:32,527 --> 00:27:35,447 Speaker 1: Love how many of your analogies involve facings whole, but 542 00:27:35,487 --> 00:27:36,887 Speaker 1: they really are effective. 543 00:27:38,127 --> 00:27:40,567 Speaker 2: Now I have to remove each one of these, you 544 00:27:40,607 --> 00:27:42,327 Speaker 2: know what I mean, until I can do my job 545 00:27:42,407 --> 00:27:45,527 Speaker 2: because it's covering pooh. It's literally covering my keyboard and 546 00:27:45,607 --> 00:27:50,247 Speaker 2: my computer screen. So it's tricky. But a good manager 547 00:27:50,807 --> 00:27:54,287 Speaker 2: isn't phased by that, can talk very honestly to someone 548 00:27:54,327 --> 00:27:57,847 Speaker 2: in this is a very sensitive situation, this particular one, right, 549 00:27:57,887 --> 00:28:00,887 Speaker 2: it's very sensitive, as you've beautifully articulated me or I 550 00:28:00,927 --> 00:28:03,367 Speaker 2: don't need to say it again, but like everybody knows 551 00:28:03,407 --> 00:28:06,287 Speaker 2: that this is a really valid concern. But also it's 552 00:28:06,327 --> 00:28:09,127 Speaker 2: really important that the people who go away and have 553 00:28:09,367 --> 00:28:11,847 Speaker 2: babies still feel part of the workplace, right, Like that 554 00:28:11,927 --> 00:28:14,447 Speaker 2: connection is really important, and we are always saying to people, 555 00:28:14,767 --> 00:28:16,887 Speaker 2: bring your whole self to work, and you're not the 556 00:28:16,927 --> 00:28:19,487 Speaker 2: same person anyway. We've got a baby. But but so the 557 00:28:19,567 --> 00:28:21,607 Speaker 2: manager who's sitting there with all the different poos has 558 00:28:21,647 --> 00:28:24,487 Speaker 2: to work out where to put them, and it's really 559 00:28:24,567 --> 00:28:28,287 Speaker 2: hard because everybody's different and everybody's level of I don't 560 00:28:28,527 --> 00:28:30,967 Speaker 2: say the word resilience in a judgy way, like, I 561 00:28:30,967 --> 00:28:33,367 Speaker 2: don't think this person has resilience. But some people can 562 00:28:33,447 --> 00:28:36,847 Speaker 2: handle saying to somebody in the kitchen who comments on 563 00:28:36,887 --> 00:28:38,847 Speaker 2: their food like none of your business when I'm eating, 564 00:28:39,287 --> 00:28:42,247 Speaker 2: like move on. And some people will bottle that up 565 00:28:42,287 --> 00:28:44,887 Speaker 2: and feel it all day long, and it's really difficult 566 00:28:45,807 --> 00:28:49,447 Speaker 2: most of the time. Managers are not psychologists. They're in 567 00:28:49,487 --> 00:28:51,567 Speaker 2: their position because they were good at what they did 568 00:28:51,607 --> 00:28:52,887 Speaker 2: when they did it. And this is one of things 569 00:28:52,927 --> 00:28:54,967 Speaker 2: that's changing about the workplace, and I think for a 570 00:28:55,047 --> 00:28:58,047 Speaker 2: good reason is that now I think we're recognizing that 571 00:28:58,127 --> 00:29:00,327 Speaker 2: managers aren't necessarily the person who is just good at 572 00:29:00,327 --> 00:29:03,167 Speaker 2: doing the job, but is really good with people and 573 00:29:03,247 --> 00:29:05,527 Speaker 2: is open to learning and is open to listening and 574 00:29:05,567 --> 00:29:08,647 Speaker 2: figuring out how to deal with this. Just because you 575 00:29:08,687 --> 00:29:11,487 Speaker 2: were once at the job that your staff are doing now, 576 00:29:11,527 --> 00:29:14,767 Speaker 2: it doesn't mean that you're in any way qualified or 577 00:29:14,847 --> 00:29:18,047 Speaker 2: able to offer psychological advice to a woman who's struggling 578 00:29:18,087 --> 00:29:20,927 Speaker 2: with infertility. That's like a different ballgame, right. 579 00:29:21,607 --> 00:29:23,887 Speaker 1: I watch a lot of her advice. That expert that 580 00:29:23,967 --> 00:29:28,287 Speaker 1: you mentioned. She does a series on YouTube's American and 581 00:29:28,327 --> 00:29:31,767 Speaker 1: she works for the Harvard business school and often does 582 00:29:31,887 --> 00:29:34,527 Speaker 1: really helpful practical bits of advice. 583 00:29:34,887 --> 00:29:35,287 Speaker 2: She does. 584 00:29:35,367 --> 00:29:38,167 Speaker 4: One on which I really liked it was a newsletter 585 00:29:38,327 --> 00:29:42,167 Speaker 4: where she wrote about how gossiping can be really helpful 586 00:29:42,167 --> 00:29:45,487 Speaker 4: to a workplace, and it's often seen that traditionally it's 587 00:29:45,527 --> 00:29:49,047 Speaker 4: seen as toxic and corrosive, but in fact there are 588 00:29:49,087 --> 00:29:52,287 Speaker 4: good types of gossiping and bad types of gossiping, and 589 00:29:52,807 --> 00:29:55,647 Speaker 4: the good ones she said, Well, the upsides to gossip 590 00:29:55,807 --> 00:29:58,527 Speaker 4: is that it helps form bonds and can give you 591 00:29:58,647 --> 00:30:02,087 Speaker 4: access to important information. So, for example, if you get 592 00:30:02,087 --> 00:30:04,127 Speaker 4: an email and you go, I don't know what this 593 00:30:04,167 --> 00:30:06,487 Speaker 4: email's telling me to do, turning to the person next 594 00:30:06,527 --> 00:30:08,807 Speaker 4: to you and saying is this vague? Does this read 595 00:30:08,847 --> 00:30:12,047 Speaker 4: as vague to you? Is actually a really important way 596 00:30:12,087 --> 00:30:13,167 Speaker 4: of connecting what's. 597 00:30:13,047 --> 00:30:15,767 Speaker 1: The difference between gossiping and bitching? Though, because she said, 598 00:30:16,127 --> 00:30:18,687 Speaker 1: You've got to be careful because it can become stigmatizing. 599 00:30:19,047 --> 00:30:22,687 Speaker 1: If you and Jane bond over the fact that Angela 600 00:30:23,007 --> 00:30:25,807 Speaker 1: is a bit of a dick or interrupts in meetings, 601 00:30:26,247 --> 00:30:30,287 Speaker 1: then suddenly everything Angela does you'll start seeing through that 602 00:30:30,407 --> 00:30:32,367 Speaker 1: lens in it'll become a self fulfilling prophecy. 603 00:30:32,487 --> 00:30:35,447 Speaker 4: And she had this filter, which is like is it 604 00:30:35,527 --> 00:30:39,247 Speaker 4: helping or is it hurting? So if you're sitting in 605 00:30:39,287 --> 00:30:42,327 Speaker 4: a meeting and you need something clarified, or you say, 606 00:30:42,847 --> 00:30:45,647 Speaker 4: say you're talking about a CEO and like I feel 607 00:30:45,687 --> 00:30:48,047 Speaker 4: as though I can't capture he's or her attention, how 608 00:30:48,047 --> 00:30:50,047 Speaker 4: do you whatever it is? And it's like that's helping 609 00:30:50,087 --> 00:30:53,207 Speaker 4: and that's a productive thing. But the other element is 610 00:30:53,607 --> 00:30:57,127 Speaker 4: confirmation bias. So if I go, have you noticed that 611 00:30:57,247 --> 00:31:00,807 Speaker 4: Holly is always da da da da da. 612 00:31:00,327 --> 00:31:03,167 Speaker 1: Talking about feces? Yeah, she's talking about PC. 613 00:31:03,527 --> 00:31:05,567 Speaker 5: Yes, And I don't want to help Holly with that. 614 00:31:05,807 --> 00:31:08,087 Speaker 2: All the time, skirt got a problem. 615 00:31:08,127 --> 00:31:10,487 Speaker 4: I just want to stigmatize her. And then you start 616 00:31:10,567 --> 00:31:12,407 Speaker 4: noticing it because I brought it up, and then I 617 00:31:12,447 --> 00:31:14,607 Speaker 4: spread it again and spread yes, she said it again, 618 00:31:14,647 --> 00:31:18,607 Speaker 4: and then it's like an absolute I've had war against Holly. 619 00:31:19,047 --> 00:31:19,847 Speaker 5: Then that's not. 620 00:31:19,967 --> 00:31:22,007 Speaker 2: Holly is feeling really vulnerable now? 621 00:31:23,127 --> 00:31:26,127 Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, And then we talked again the nickname Holy 622 00:31:26,207 --> 00:31:26,807 Speaker 1: the ship talk. 623 00:31:28,367 --> 00:31:29,647 Speaker 2: Well, thanks for the feedback. 624 00:31:29,847 --> 00:31:31,287 Speaker 1: Great, I'd love your feedback. 625 00:31:31,887 --> 00:31:35,887 Speaker 2: What a gift. I have some festive feedback since my 626 00:31:35,967 --> 00:31:38,727 Speaker 2: last batch of festive feedback went down really well. I 627 00:31:38,807 --> 00:31:40,807 Speaker 2: talked about Christmas trees and when you should put them up. 628 00:31:41,327 --> 00:31:43,367 Speaker 2: I don't want to get a reputation for as a grinch, 629 00:31:43,407 --> 00:31:45,207 Speaker 2: because I actually do love Christmas. But I have some 630 00:31:45,327 --> 00:31:49,967 Speaker 2: feedback about Advent calendars very timely when I was a kid, 631 00:31:50,127 --> 00:31:54,207 Speaker 2: because I do love Christmas, despite what they say about me, Mia, 632 00:31:54,327 --> 00:31:56,527 Speaker 2: I do love Christmas and December the first was always 633 00:31:56,567 --> 00:31:58,807 Speaker 2: very exciting because when you got your Advent calendar right 634 00:31:58,887 --> 00:32:00,847 Speaker 2: and you opened your little doors, and when I was 635 00:32:00,887 --> 00:32:06,647 Speaker 2: a kid, you'd go, oh, there's a picture of a train, yay. 636 00:32:05,807 --> 00:32:08,087 Speaker 1: And then you went outside and played with two rocks. 637 00:32:07,847 --> 00:32:11,807 Speaker 2: And then stayed open. Oh there's a gingerbread man. And 638 00:32:12,127 --> 00:32:14,167 Speaker 2: the excitement would build all the way to the twenty 639 00:32:14,167 --> 00:32:16,487 Speaker 2: fourth when you've got double doors on the Advent calendar 640 00:32:16,487 --> 00:32:17,927 Speaker 2: and you open them and there might be a little 641 00:32:17,927 --> 00:32:20,647 Speaker 2: baby Jesus in there. Just all pictures, all pictures. 642 00:32:20,687 --> 00:32:26,447 Speaker 4: That's the saddest of your upbringing in Manchester, just being 643 00:32:26,527 --> 00:32:28,887 Speaker 4: a sad snow it's dark all the time and there's 644 00:32:28,967 --> 00:32:31,047 Speaker 4: cold in paying. 645 00:32:32,927 --> 00:32:35,927 Speaker 1: Toy hadumps of coin. I wrapped them up and put 646 00:32:35,927 --> 00:32:36,687 Speaker 1: them under the tree. 647 00:32:37,007 --> 00:32:39,687 Speaker 2: I still loved my Advent calendar for that reason. Their 648 00:32:39,727 --> 00:32:41,447 Speaker 2: Advent Caldor's got chocolates in them? 649 00:32:41,527 --> 00:32:41,687 Speaker 4: Right? 650 00:32:41,807 --> 00:32:44,007 Speaker 2: My kids have always had Advent calendars with little chocolates 651 00:32:44,007 --> 00:32:46,607 Speaker 2: in them. I've grumbled about it, like the crunchy person have, 652 00:32:46,807 --> 00:32:49,487 Speaker 2: Oh we have to give them chocolate, now, do we? Oh? 653 00:32:49,767 --> 00:32:52,687 Speaker 2: How little I knew that just a short time later 654 00:32:53,127 --> 00:32:56,207 Speaker 2: Advent calendars had to have beer in them, or beauty 655 00:32:56,247 --> 00:32:59,727 Speaker 2: products in them, or perfume in them, or candles in them. 656 00:33:00,167 --> 00:33:03,087 Speaker 2: Because the how Jesse? Am I right that even in 657 00:33:03,127 --> 00:33:05,407 Speaker 2: your house, where there is no child who is yet 658 00:33:05,967 --> 00:33:09,127 Speaker 2: sentiment about Christmas, you have an Advent calendar in your fridge. 659 00:33:09,367 --> 00:33:11,927 Speaker 4: Yes, so I can't fit in any of the food 660 00:33:12,367 --> 00:33:14,967 Speaker 4: I'm trying to prepare for Luna's week because our fridge 661 00:33:15,007 --> 00:33:16,967 Speaker 4: is taken over by a beer Advent calendar. 662 00:33:17,247 --> 00:33:19,327 Speaker 5: I didn't know there were twelve different types. 663 00:33:18,967 --> 00:33:23,927 Speaker 1: Of beer beer calendar that Luca bought for himself. I 664 00:33:23,967 --> 00:33:26,687 Speaker 1: think it also what alarms me the feedback I have 665 00:33:26,847 --> 00:33:30,967 Speaker 1: Advent calendars is the creep of Christmas. Like I know 666 00:33:31,087 --> 00:33:34,127 Speaker 1: that Holly was grinchy last week when or whenever it 667 00:33:34,207 --> 00:33:36,327 Speaker 1: was when she got canceled for telling people they had 668 00:33:36,367 --> 00:33:38,247 Speaker 1: no class if they put their trees up before Miss 669 00:33:38,287 --> 00:33:42,687 Speaker 1: December and many of us, myself included, went and put 670 00:33:42,687 --> 00:33:45,407 Speaker 1: our trees up quickly in November just to spite her. 671 00:33:46,167 --> 00:33:49,407 Speaker 1: But I think that this idea because obviously an advent 672 00:33:49,487 --> 00:33:52,887 Speaker 1: calendar has to be given to someone at the beginning 673 00:33:52,887 --> 00:33:57,607 Speaker 1: of December first, So when have I got to start 674 00:33:57,607 --> 00:33:59,567 Speaker 1: my Christmas shopping? And who do I have to buy 675 00:33:59,607 --> 00:34:00,487 Speaker 1: advent calendars? 676 00:34:00,527 --> 00:34:03,087 Speaker 2: Four Well, people buy them for themselves now a lot, 677 00:34:03,127 --> 00:34:05,367 Speaker 2: because it's become oven Kindors used to be for kids, 678 00:34:05,367 --> 00:34:08,447 Speaker 2: but now adults want them to So I was, and 679 00:34:08,487 --> 00:34:10,247 Speaker 2: I know I'm an need it, but I was silly 680 00:34:10,327 --> 00:34:11,967 Speaker 2: enough to decide that I would get my daughter a 681 00:34:12,047 --> 00:34:14,527 Speaker 2: beauty one because I'm a pushover and you know I'm 682 00:34:14,527 --> 00:34:15,927 Speaker 2: trying to. 683 00:34:15,327 --> 00:34:16,687 Speaker 5: Love you, but I'm so so sorry. 684 00:34:16,967 --> 00:34:20,727 Speaker 1: Are you giving feedback to yourself? Bred much to capitalism, 685 00:34:20,807 --> 00:34:21,567 Speaker 1: but to capitalism? 686 00:34:21,607 --> 00:34:23,327 Speaker 2: Because I went on to buy one and they're all 687 00:34:23,367 --> 00:34:26,007 Speaker 2: sold out and they all cost twenty million dollars and 688 00:34:26,047 --> 00:34:28,967 Speaker 2: you're just like, what, who's buying this stuff? That it 689 00:34:29,007 --> 00:34:30,167 Speaker 2: held me? Do you know what you should? 690 00:34:30,407 --> 00:34:33,367 Speaker 1: You sh'd make one just with little pictures of beauty 691 00:34:33,367 --> 00:34:34,407 Speaker 1: product printed out. 692 00:34:34,327 --> 00:34:37,727 Speaker 5: From the internet, drawn drawn. 693 00:34:38,207 --> 00:34:41,127 Speaker 2: Look, Matilda, look what I've got you. When I was 694 00:34:41,167 --> 00:34:43,367 Speaker 2: a kid. We were happy with a crayon drawing of 695 00:34:43,407 --> 00:34:45,327 Speaker 2: a lipstick. It's a little drawing. 696 00:34:45,007 --> 00:34:49,127 Speaker 1: Of a drunk elephant moisturizer. I reckon, look at its 697 00:34:49,167 --> 00:34:49,927 Speaker 1: green little lid. 698 00:34:50,727 --> 00:34:53,367 Speaker 4: I reckon that this is a two types of people thing, though, 699 00:34:53,407 --> 00:34:56,527 Speaker 4: because I gave up on advent calendars when I realized 700 00:34:56,567 --> 00:34:58,847 Speaker 4: I was meant to wait, because you meant to wait. 701 00:34:58,967 --> 00:35:01,087 Speaker 5: Oh, one day, two days. 702 00:35:00,807 --> 00:35:02,567 Speaker 4: Three day, I would eat all my chocolate and be like, 703 00:35:02,567 --> 00:35:05,407 Speaker 4: my event calendar's all gone. Yeah, there's no way I'm 704 00:35:05,487 --> 00:35:06,967 Speaker 4: opening a beauty product every day. 705 00:35:07,007 --> 00:35:09,687 Speaker 2: I gave Matilda her a Vent calendar, and I said, 706 00:35:10,087 --> 00:35:13,527 Speaker 2: if you rummage through and look at all the gifts, 707 00:35:13,887 --> 00:35:16,647 Speaker 2: I am taking it away. It is one gift a 708 00:35:16,767 --> 00:35:21,767 Speaker 2: day or nothing. That's the point of an aunt. Do 709 00:35:21,807 --> 00:35:24,087 Speaker 2: you have to have a point. You're not supposed to 710 00:35:24,167 --> 00:35:28,407 Speaker 2: just open them all once. Imagine if you've looked at 711 00:35:28,447 --> 00:35:30,407 Speaker 2: all the little pictures of the gingerbread men of. 712 00:35:30,447 --> 00:35:34,287 Speaker 4: One in a Moment, The Anatomy of a rumor featuring 713 00:35:34,287 --> 00:35:35,287 Speaker 4: Harry and Megan. 714 00:35:36,127 --> 00:35:38,687 Speaker 1: Do you want daily out loud access? Why wouldn't you? 715 00:35:38,807 --> 00:35:40,287 Speaker 2: We drop episodes. 716 00:35:39,847 --> 00:35:43,287 Speaker 1: Every Tuesday and Thursday exclusively for Mum of Me A 717 00:35:43,367 --> 00:35:45,847 Speaker 1: subscribers follow the link in the show notes to get 718 00:35:45,887 --> 00:35:48,247 Speaker 1: us in your ears five days a week, and a 719 00:35:48,287 --> 00:35:50,647 Speaker 1: huge thank you if you're already a subscriber. 720 00:36:00,647 --> 00:36:03,447 Speaker 2: They're never together. They're arguing about where to live, their 721 00:36:03,487 --> 00:36:06,047 Speaker 2: careers are going in different directions, and they're fighting about 722 00:36:06,047 --> 00:36:09,167 Speaker 2: their families. If you're a regular on any gossiping news, 723 00:36:09,607 --> 00:36:11,527 Speaker 2: you might have seen that Prince Harry and Meghan Mark, 724 00:36:11,607 --> 00:36:14,247 Speaker 2: or the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, whose daughter Lilybet 725 00:36:14,247 --> 00:36:18,847 Speaker 2: will definitely be at that French ball in a mining 726 00:36:19,007 --> 00:36:22,047 Speaker 2: and they love it, are definitely on the brink of 727 00:36:22,207 --> 00:36:25,167 Speaker 2: divorce for all the reasons listed above. It's only a 728 00:36:25,167 --> 00:36:28,807 Speaker 2: matter of time apparently, until the announcement comes out. They 729 00:36:28,807 --> 00:36:32,967 Speaker 2: are like breathless countdowns, except no, there is no announcement 730 00:36:33,007 --> 00:36:35,087 Speaker 2: coming out. There's no reason to think, actually that there's 731 00:36:35,087 --> 00:36:37,687 Speaker 2: anything going on here other than that two busy people 732 00:36:37,687 --> 00:36:39,927 Speaker 2: who are pretty keen on their privacy and that of 733 00:36:39,967 --> 00:36:42,567 Speaker 2: their kids are getting on with work. So how did 734 00:36:42,607 --> 00:36:45,487 Speaker 2: this rumor start? And what does it take to kick 735 00:36:45,527 --> 00:36:50,607 Speaker 2: off Hollywood divorce? What work? Sorry, we'll we'll get to that. 736 00:36:51,727 --> 00:36:55,287 Speaker 2: It's simple. Really. What has to happen is starvation we 737 00:36:55,407 --> 00:36:58,727 Speaker 2: haven't had a sighting, as we call it when when 738 00:36:58,767 --> 00:36:59,927 Speaker 2: famous people leave. 739 00:36:59,767 --> 00:37:01,847 Speaker 1: Their houses they're flaun. 740 00:37:03,247 --> 00:37:06,367 Speaker 2: We haven't had a sighting of Harry and Meghan together 741 00:37:06,967 --> 00:37:09,607 Speaker 2: for eighty one days now. Yes, I know, I've got 742 00:37:09,607 --> 00:37:12,207 Speaker 2: a few royal timelines going on. It's still two hundred 743 00:37:12,247 --> 00:37:14,727 Speaker 2: and sixteen days since I signed up for Meghan's Jam 744 00:37:14,767 --> 00:37:15,527 Speaker 2: news letter. 745 00:37:15,447 --> 00:37:18,087 Speaker 1: Waiting for Jam Holly's Breakaway podcast. 746 00:37:19,447 --> 00:37:22,567 Speaker 2: And in a vacuum, stories grow, right, stories grow like 747 00:37:22,607 --> 00:37:26,167 Speaker 2: weeds and then they feed on themselves. So what's basically 748 00:37:26,247 --> 00:37:29,927 Speaker 2: happened apparently is that Harry is busy with his things. 749 00:37:30,007 --> 00:37:32,967 Speaker 2: So he's doing the Invictus Games is in Canada in February, 750 00:37:32,967 --> 00:37:35,687 Speaker 2: and pr for It is launching now, so he's been 751 00:37:35,687 --> 00:37:38,487 Speaker 2: in Canada. He's been making hilarious videos where he got 752 00:37:38,487 --> 00:37:41,567 Speaker 2: a fake tattoo on his neck. He's been spooking that right. 753 00:37:42,127 --> 00:37:44,527 Speaker 2: And also he's got a show coming out on Netflix 754 00:37:44,527 --> 00:37:46,727 Speaker 2: which is about Polo, which we'll get to in a month. 755 00:37:46,807 --> 00:37:47,127 Speaker 1: Is Heen. 756 00:37:47,687 --> 00:37:50,607 Speaker 2: He's not in it, but he and Megan together have 757 00:37:50,727 --> 00:37:52,767 Speaker 2: produced it. So if you watch the trailer, the first 758 00:37:52,767 --> 00:37:55,287 Speaker 2: thing that comes up is says executive producers, you can 759 00:37:55,367 --> 00:37:58,847 Speaker 2: dutchess of Sussex. But it's a show like Drive to Survive. 760 00:37:58,927 --> 00:38:01,887 Speaker 2: You know that reality show about Formula One that made 761 00:38:01,927 --> 00:38:03,207 Speaker 2: Formula one really sexy. 762 00:38:03,367 --> 00:38:05,167 Speaker 1: They're trying to do like a behind the scenes. 763 00:38:05,567 --> 00:38:07,607 Speaker 2: They're trying to do that with Polo. So it's very 764 00:38:07,647 --> 00:38:11,087 Speaker 2: high production values. Imagine going on a horse thirty five 765 00:38:11,127 --> 00:38:14,447 Speaker 2: miles an hour with someone coming at you at full 766 00:38:14,487 --> 00:38:19,807 Speaker 2: speed year channel. When that goes to your body, it's addictive. 767 00:38:22,087 --> 00:38:25,687 Speaker 2: Bolo is not just a sport. Follow is her lifestague. 768 00:38:27,167 --> 00:38:30,447 Speaker 6: We need, we Breathe, we sleep, Toolo. 769 00:38:31,487 --> 00:38:32,767 Speaker 2: Lots of fancy people shouting. 770 00:38:33,087 --> 00:38:35,247 Speaker 5: I can't even tell you one thing about pot well. 771 00:38:35,287 --> 00:38:38,607 Speaker 1: I think there'd be a very interesting Venn diagram of 772 00:38:39,047 --> 00:38:41,167 Speaker 1: Polo people and labal. 773 00:38:44,847 --> 00:38:48,687 Speaker 2: So that's what he's doing right. Megan is still launching 774 00:38:48,727 --> 00:38:51,127 Speaker 2: her I mean not her JAM. I feel that may 775 00:38:51,207 --> 00:38:54,967 Speaker 2: never come her lifestyle brand. Everybody said this week that 776 00:38:55,047 --> 00:38:58,087 Speaker 2: her lifestyle brand and show is still on track to 777 00:38:58,207 --> 00:38:59,527 Speaker 2: launch early next year. 778 00:38:59,727 --> 00:39:01,727 Speaker 1: I thought they had a hiccup because she got knocked 779 00:39:01,767 --> 00:39:06,647 Speaker 1: back for her patent application for American Riviera Orchard. 780 00:39:06,847 --> 00:39:10,527 Speaker 2: Now yep, she did, she did, but that seems to 781 00:39:10,527 --> 00:39:13,687 Speaker 2: be being ironed out. Another brand is called Royal Riviera 782 00:39:13,767 --> 00:39:16,847 Speaker 2: and they're saying, hey, that's too close. Who's who's the 783 00:39:16,927 --> 00:39:20,927 Speaker 2: royal here? And she's like, work, take out one of them. 784 00:39:20,927 --> 00:39:23,047 Speaker 2: But apparently it is all still go, and what the 785 00:39:23,167 --> 00:39:25,567 Speaker 2: plan is is it's going to all launch it once. 786 00:39:25,607 --> 00:39:28,127 Speaker 2: So the TV show and the brand and the show 787 00:39:28,207 --> 00:39:30,647 Speaker 2: is going to be sort of like a modern Martha 788 00:39:30,727 --> 00:39:35,207 Speaker 2: Stewarty thing where it's home garden cooking style blah. Right, 789 00:39:35,247 --> 00:39:37,327 Speaker 2: that's all going to happen. So next year it's going 790 00:39:37,367 --> 00:39:40,047 Speaker 2: to be the Year of Megan. So like tradwive stuff, 791 00:39:40,527 --> 00:39:46,727 Speaker 2: well it's not tradwive stuff, it's lifestyle, lifestyle influencer stuff. 792 00:39:46,847 --> 00:39:51,287 Speaker 2: Martha ste domestic, got. 793 00:39:50,087 --> 00:39:52,927 Speaker 4: Nothing wrong with some domesticity. I will defend domesticity. 794 00:39:53,047 --> 00:39:57,727 Speaker 2: This is apparently a very deliberate twin track career plan. Right, 795 00:39:57,767 --> 00:40:00,807 Speaker 2: It's been almost two years since the Netflix stocko dropped 796 00:40:00,847 --> 00:40:03,607 Speaker 2: that was all about them talking about their story, their 797 00:40:03,607 --> 00:40:05,767 Speaker 2: love story, what had happened. They're gripe, they're leaving the 798 00:40:05,807 --> 00:40:08,767 Speaker 2: royal family, and almost two years since Spare came out 799 00:40:08,807 --> 00:40:12,567 Speaker 2: Harry's amazing book about that, and apparently they got wind 800 00:40:12,567 --> 00:40:14,487 Speaker 2: of the fact that everybody was tired of them together. 801 00:40:14,567 --> 00:40:17,167 Speaker 2: So now they're trying separate, so makes sense. 802 00:40:17,207 --> 00:40:19,727 Speaker 4: I think, yeah, there's been some leaks from some aids 803 00:40:19,767 --> 00:40:23,487 Speaker 4: and also kind of pr experts looking at it going 804 00:40:23,967 --> 00:40:28,367 Speaker 4: what we're seeing is a professional separation. Yes, and they were, 805 00:40:28,487 --> 00:40:32,767 Speaker 4: their projects were together. There was such fatigue and such 806 00:40:33,167 --> 00:40:35,687 Speaker 4: annoyance at them that now they've gone, all right, we're 807 00:40:35,687 --> 00:40:38,887 Speaker 4: going on two different tracks, which explains why. For example, 808 00:40:39,047 --> 00:40:42,287 Speaker 4: I think on Christmas, Harry has sent out an invitation 809 00:40:42,887 --> 00:40:45,407 Speaker 4: to an event he's doing where he's speaking to maybe 810 00:40:45,407 --> 00:40:48,007 Speaker 4: sick kids, and it's just him where it used to 811 00:40:48,007 --> 00:40:48,927 Speaker 4: be him and Megan. 812 00:40:48,727 --> 00:40:50,487 Speaker 1: Consciously uncoupling theirs. 813 00:40:51,767 --> 00:40:54,207 Speaker 2: So what I'd love to know from you, in particular me, 814 00:40:54,327 --> 00:40:56,927 Speaker 2: because you're you know this stuff is so if that's 815 00:40:56,967 --> 00:40:59,607 Speaker 2: what they're doing, as Jesse says, a professional separation, but 816 00:40:59,687 --> 00:41:01,967 Speaker 2: there's no reason to think their personal life. Isn't it 817 00:41:02,007 --> 00:41:04,207 Speaker 2: a thing other than what they're saying it is. The 818 00:41:04,287 --> 00:41:06,807 Speaker 2: problem is is in the anatomy of a rumor, they 819 00:41:06,847 --> 00:41:09,567 Speaker 2: haven't been seen together. So there's a clock going now right, 820 00:41:09,607 --> 00:41:11,727 Speaker 2: So every time you open you know, news dot Com, 821 00:41:11,807 --> 00:41:15,807 Speaker 2: Daily Mail, US gossip sites, it'll say thirty six days, 822 00:41:15,887 --> 00:41:18,087 Speaker 2: forty four days and an invite goes out like the 823 00:41:18,087 --> 00:41:20,447 Speaker 2: one you were just talking about, Jesse. That's like Harry's 824 00:41:20,487 --> 00:41:23,527 Speaker 2: launching and having a Christmas charity function. Where's Meghan? There 825 00:41:23,607 --> 00:41:24,207 Speaker 2: must be problem? 826 00:41:24,287 --> 00:41:26,167 Speaker 1: Why mana days is quite a long time? 827 00:41:26,367 --> 00:41:29,447 Speaker 2: Well, the question is when you know this is happening, 828 00:41:29,567 --> 00:41:31,767 Speaker 2: so you know that the divorce roomors are bubbling, you 829 00:41:31,807 --> 00:41:34,167 Speaker 2: know it's all going on. Is the best way to 830 00:41:34,207 --> 00:41:37,567 Speaker 2: try and douse the rumor? To just bite the bullet 831 00:41:37,607 --> 00:41:41,167 Speaker 2: and go to something together, Pat walk it or Harry 832 00:41:41,167 --> 00:41:43,367 Speaker 2: and Meghan just better off sticking their fingers up and 833 00:41:43,407 --> 00:41:46,287 Speaker 2: going we know what's going on. We're just doing our 834 00:41:46,287 --> 00:41:49,127 Speaker 2: thing to shut up the rumor. Tolice the rumor down. 835 00:41:49,207 --> 00:41:52,807 Speaker 1: You're right, it would be very easy to shut this 836 00:41:53,047 --> 00:41:55,727 Speaker 1: down by being seen in public. They're in a bit 837 00:41:55,727 --> 00:41:59,127 Speaker 1: of a tricky position because their whole brand has been 838 00:42:00,007 --> 00:42:04,967 Speaker 1: really built on righteous indignation against the media. I mean 839 00:42:05,007 --> 00:42:09,127 Speaker 1: that actually quite sincerely, like they have really been hounded 840 00:42:09,447 --> 00:42:13,287 Speaker 1: the media. Harry carries obviously a huge amount of baggage 841 00:42:13,327 --> 00:42:16,687 Speaker 1: and trauma about the role the media played in the 842 00:42:16,687 --> 00:42:19,167 Speaker 1: death of his mother and the sort of the harassment 843 00:42:19,207 --> 00:42:23,167 Speaker 1: of her ongoing, and then about his wife, and that's 844 00:42:23,207 --> 00:42:25,407 Speaker 1: all now caught up, of course with his family and 845 00:42:25,487 --> 00:42:29,207 Speaker 1: leaking to the press, and the same thing happened to Megan, 846 00:42:29,287 --> 00:42:32,287 Speaker 1: So I understand that they do feel very indignant and 847 00:42:32,327 --> 00:42:35,687 Speaker 1: angry about the media. But celebrities have to be able 848 00:42:35,727 --> 00:42:38,767 Speaker 1: to play the media, and because they've painted themselves into 849 00:42:38,847 --> 00:42:42,167 Speaker 1: this position where they won't play, or they'll only play 850 00:42:42,167 --> 00:42:46,207 Speaker 1: on their terms. And they've also been quite adamant that 851 00:42:46,327 --> 00:42:49,247 Speaker 1: social media is toxic and terrible and they don't want 852 00:42:49,287 --> 00:42:52,887 Speaker 1: to be on social media, so they've really cut off 853 00:42:53,367 --> 00:42:58,047 Speaker 1: their lines of communication with the world because you don't 854 00:42:58,047 --> 00:42:59,967 Speaker 1: have to talk to the media if you can talk 855 00:43:00,007 --> 00:43:03,367 Speaker 1: directly to people through your own social media accounts. That's 856 00:43:03,407 --> 00:43:07,247 Speaker 1: what celebrities have learned over the last few years, and 857 00:43:07,327 --> 00:43:11,087 Speaker 1: why the celebrities who haven't. I mean, even Jennifer Aniston 858 00:43:11,127 --> 00:43:14,247 Speaker 1: does it now. And I noticed even Prince William on 859 00:43:14,247 --> 00:43:17,687 Speaker 1: the weekend posted a talking to his phone, posting some 860 00:43:17,767 --> 00:43:22,607 Speaker 1: congratulations message to someone. And that's how you become relatable. 861 00:43:22,687 --> 00:43:25,567 Speaker 1: And Harry and Meghan have this really interesting brand where 862 00:43:26,287 --> 00:43:28,407 Speaker 1: they want to be relatable, but they also want to 863 00:43:28,407 --> 00:43:31,327 Speaker 1: be untouchable, so they want to keep all the status 864 00:43:31,367 --> 00:43:35,207 Speaker 1: of being royals and all the sort of superiority and 865 00:43:35,927 --> 00:43:39,647 Speaker 1: mystery that that brings with it, But they're also like 866 00:43:40,087 --> 00:43:43,287 Speaker 1: but we're just like you, So it's a really tricky. 867 00:43:43,047 --> 00:43:43,767 Speaker 5: Net of tread. 868 00:43:44,047 --> 00:43:46,807 Speaker 4: The other element is the ages of their children in 869 00:43:46,887 --> 00:43:51,407 Speaker 4: terms of privacy but also childcare. So if one of 870 00:43:51,407 --> 00:43:53,087 Speaker 4: them is traveling, and I know that that sounds such 871 00:43:53,127 --> 00:43:55,247 Speaker 4: a silly thing to say when they have resources, but 872 00:43:56,127 --> 00:43:58,007 Speaker 4: if one of them is traveling to the other side 873 00:43:58,047 --> 00:43:59,807 Speaker 4: of the world, then that's a big call for two 874 00:43:59,967 --> 00:44:02,807 Speaker 4: working parents to be separated from their children for a week. 875 00:44:02,887 --> 00:44:05,047 Speaker 5: I understand that decision. 876 00:44:05,047 --> 00:44:07,927 Speaker 2: Especially sure you would tag team careers a little. 877 00:44:07,687 --> 00:44:11,007 Speaker 4: Bit exactly, so maybe it's become unfeasible for them to 878 00:44:11,087 --> 00:44:12,447 Speaker 4: be traveling together. 879 00:44:12,647 --> 00:44:14,527 Speaker 1: That's fair. Like in some ways, it's easier to do 880 00:44:14,527 --> 00:44:16,327 Speaker 1: that when your kids are really little because they kind 881 00:44:16,327 --> 00:44:17,887 Speaker 1: of don't know, but their kids are well like five 882 00:44:17,927 --> 00:44:18,207 Speaker 1: and three. 883 00:44:19,007 --> 00:44:21,487 Speaker 2: One of the interesting things about this is we talk 884 00:44:21,567 --> 00:44:25,207 Speaker 2: sometimes on out loud about, you know, strategy around paparazzi 885 00:44:25,727 --> 00:44:29,047 Speaker 2: and the way that celebrities sometimes will use it. What 886 00:44:29,207 --> 00:44:31,207 Speaker 2: this kind of shows you is that if you're a 887 00:44:31,207 --> 00:44:33,007 Speaker 2: celebrity at that level, if you don't want to be 888 00:44:33,047 --> 00:44:34,487 Speaker 2: seen and you don't want to be papped. You can 889 00:44:34,527 --> 00:44:37,687 Speaker 2: do it right, because we haven't seen those children, and 890 00:44:37,767 --> 00:44:40,887 Speaker 2: no should we. I'm not not complaining about this, but 891 00:44:41,007 --> 00:44:44,247 Speaker 2: we have not seen those children since they were showing 892 00:44:44,247 --> 00:44:46,247 Speaker 2: their family pictures in the Netflix stock ow and stuff. 893 00:44:46,247 --> 00:44:48,207 Speaker 2: I don't think we've actually really seen them at all. 894 00:44:48,447 --> 00:44:51,327 Speaker 2: They're obviously very concerned about privacy, which is fair enough. 895 00:44:51,727 --> 00:44:54,127 Speaker 2: Magan occasionally gets papped, you know, in and out of 896 00:44:54,127 --> 00:44:56,247 Speaker 2: a yoga studio, in and out of lunch with friends, 897 00:44:56,287 --> 00:44:59,887 Speaker 2: but generally speaking, they have managed to quite successfully build 898 00:44:59,927 --> 00:45:02,767 Speaker 2: themselves a private life. And that is what Prince Harry 899 00:45:02,807 --> 00:45:06,247 Speaker 2: has been saying that he's wanted forever is I don't 900 00:45:06,247 --> 00:45:08,047 Speaker 2: want to be hounded by the paparazzi. I don't want 901 00:45:08,087 --> 00:45:09,287 Speaker 2: to have to deal with that every time I go. 902 00:45:09,647 --> 00:45:12,287 Speaker 2: I want my family to have a safe environment to 903 00:45:12,327 --> 00:45:14,127 Speaker 2: grow up in. I want to be able to choose 904 00:45:14,127 --> 00:45:16,247 Speaker 2: whether or not I show you pictures of them. And 905 00:45:16,287 --> 00:45:18,927 Speaker 2: that's what he's got. The problem with it is is 906 00:45:18,967 --> 00:45:22,567 Speaker 2: it just does open up all this speculation. So they 907 00:45:22,687 --> 00:45:24,727 Speaker 2: may have an opportunity. I guess if they wanted to 908 00:45:24,767 --> 00:45:27,087 Speaker 2: shut everybody up, they might go to the premiere of 909 00:45:27,127 --> 00:45:30,207 Speaker 2: Polo Together this week. Sometime. I think it officially launches 910 00:45:30,207 --> 00:45:33,047 Speaker 2: on the tenth of December. They sometimes are seen at 911 00:45:33,047 --> 00:45:35,007 Speaker 2: a you know, they'll put out a little video to 912 00:45:35,007 --> 00:45:39,607 Speaker 2: speaking to camera for charity. But that pressure of constantly 913 00:45:39,807 --> 00:45:42,127 Speaker 2: what are you going to give us? We haven't seen you? 914 00:45:42,327 --> 00:45:45,687 Speaker 2: Is there a problem is also sort of animated by 915 00:45:45,687 --> 00:45:47,727 Speaker 2: the fact everybody kind of wants there to be a problem. 916 00:45:47,767 --> 00:45:50,367 Speaker 1: It's a bit giving Kate Middleton, though, isn't it. Remember 917 00:45:50,367 --> 00:45:52,367 Speaker 1: when it was like a where's Kate? How many days? 918 00:45:52,407 --> 00:45:53,487 Speaker 2: Where's Kate? Where's Kate? 919 00:45:53,647 --> 00:45:54,047 Speaker 5: Difference? 920 00:45:54,047 --> 00:45:56,087 Speaker 4: And the other element I do think is worth noting 921 00:45:56,327 --> 00:45:59,047 Speaker 4: is the extent to which people are rooting for this divorce, 922 00:45:59,127 --> 00:46:01,847 Speaker 4: and I think that that's embedded in a lot of 923 00:46:01,847 --> 00:46:05,447 Speaker 4: the reporting. It's almost wish fulfillment in terms of if 924 00:46:05,487 --> 00:46:08,647 Speaker 4: they split, then everything we always said about Meghan was true, 925 00:46:08,647 --> 00:46:11,047 Speaker 4: which of course is not the case at all. 926 00:46:11,167 --> 00:46:13,567 Speaker 2: But I want Harry to be miserable and regretful about 927 00:46:13,687 --> 00:46:16,167 Speaker 2: leaving Britain and leaving the Royals. 928 00:46:15,807 --> 00:46:17,887 Speaker 4: And him to realize that we were right, that his 929 00:46:18,047 --> 00:46:21,327 Speaker 4: family was right, that this woman who we have represented 930 00:46:21,367 --> 00:46:25,567 Speaker 4: as strong willed and a bully, has fractured this family, 931 00:46:25,847 --> 00:46:29,087 Speaker 4: and like we want him to have this epiphany, like. 932 00:46:29,487 --> 00:46:31,047 Speaker 1: Do you think what people are rooting for? 933 00:46:31,127 --> 00:46:32,847 Speaker 4: I think that there are definitely There was a great 934 00:46:32,927 --> 00:46:35,567 Speaker 4: story on Maya over the weekend by Laura Brodnick who 935 00:46:35,567 --> 00:46:38,087 Speaker 4: said that people sit into two camps, but I think 936 00:46:38,127 --> 00:46:43,647 Speaker 4: specifically the British monarchist camp want this divorce to happen. 937 00:46:43,727 --> 00:46:46,167 Speaker 4: They see this as having been a real like kink 938 00:46:46,207 --> 00:46:49,247 Speaker 4: in the armor of the monarchy, and so I don't 939 00:46:49,247 --> 00:46:52,687 Speaker 4: think we've ever seen before people want to divorce this badly, 940 00:46:52,847 --> 00:46:54,807 Speaker 4: like people actually want this rumor to be true. 941 00:46:55,327 --> 00:46:57,807 Speaker 2: That's all we've got time for today. I may never 942 00:46:57,847 --> 00:46:59,807 Speaker 2: recover from the advent calendar class. 943 00:47:00,447 --> 00:47:02,047 Speaker 1: I'm still having a good think about that. 944 00:47:02,847 --> 00:47:05,367 Speaker 2: A massive thank you to all of the out louders 945 00:47:05,367 --> 00:47:07,647 Speaker 2: for listening to today's show. We're going to be back 946 00:47:07,647 --> 00:47:11,007 Speaker 2: in your ears tomorrow, Out Loud, Bye. 947 00:47:10,807 --> 00:47:12,567 Speaker 5: Bye, out Louders. 948 00:47:12,567 --> 00:47:15,207 Speaker 4: I wanted to sneakily tell you that it is not 949 00:47:15,367 --> 00:47:18,327 Speaker 4: too late to jump onto the MMA mea Black Friday offer. 950 00:47:18,767 --> 00:47:21,287 Speaker 4: Mama Maya is giving you the biggest discount we've ever 951 00:47:21,407 --> 00:47:24,727 Speaker 4: offered on a subscription, and time is running out right now. 952 00:47:24,767 --> 00:47:28,527 Speaker 4: You can get thirty three dollars off a yearly subscription. 953 00:47:28,967 --> 00:47:31,527 Speaker 4: That means that you're paying thirty six dollars in total 954 00:47:31,807 --> 00:47:34,127 Speaker 4: for a whole year. That will give you full access 955 00:47:34,127 --> 00:47:36,487 Speaker 4: to all the stories and shows you love from Mamma Maya. 956 00:47:36,647 --> 00:47:39,087 Speaker 4: But it is not forever, so do not miss out. 957 00:47:39,767 --> 00:47:42,407 Speaker 4: Use the code out loud Friday. Head to the link 958 00:47:42,407 --> 00:47:44,047 Speaker 4: in our show notes for all the details. 959 00:47:44,727 --> 00:47:47,607 Speaker 2: Shout out to Emmy Mamma Mia subscribers listening. If you 960 00:47:47,767 --> 00:47:50,647 Speaker 2: love the show and you want to support us, subscribing 961 00:47:50,647 --> 00:47:53,087 Speaker 2: to Mamma Mia is the very best way to do it. 962 00:47:53,287 --> 00:47:55,167 Speaker 2: There's a link in the episode of description.