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Speaker 1: You're listening to a Mamma Mia podcast.

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Speaker 2: Mamma Mere acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters

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Speaker 2: that this podcast is recorded on Hello, and welcome to

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Speaker 2: Mamma Mia Out Loud and to our Friday's show where

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Speaker 2: we take a break from the news cycle and breathe out.

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Speaker 3: Today.

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Speaker 2: It's Friday, the twenty third of August, and I'm Holly Wainwright,

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Speaker 2: I'm mea Friedman.

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Speaker 4: And I'm Jesse Stevens.

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Speaker 2: And on the show today getting dumped and getting over it?

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Speaker 2: Do celebrities know more about heartbreak than civilians?

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Speaker 1: J Love Jaylo, one.

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Speaker 2: Of our reporters found out, and we have our own

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Speaker 2: advice for her fashion icon. Jesse Stevens has a clothing recommendation,

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Speaker 2: I want you all to watch a free TV show.

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Speaker 2: And Mia has a book she loves that she thought

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Speaker 2: she'd hate. And absent spouse is an unexpected slumber party

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Speaker 2: and some vomit. No, it wasn't me.

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Speaker 3: A Freedman's logis night.

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Speaker 2: It's our bests and worse of the week. But first,

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Speaker 2: Jesse Stevens.

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Speaker 4: In case he missed it, there is a word you

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Speaker 4: can no longer call your colleague. Maya, are you listening.

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Speaker 1: Well, there's so many there are I am I allowed

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Speaker 1: to use the S word even though I do use

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Speaker 1: it as a term of effection.

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Speaker 4: Get your pen out and write this down. And Ossie

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Speaker 4: mayor named Tom Tate has now formally apologized for a

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Speaker 4: word he used to describe a colleague. He thought it

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Speaker 4: was a lighthearted comment, but it ended up prompting a

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Speaker 4: full blown investigation. So what did he call MP John

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Speaker 4: Paul Langbrook? He called him a ranger In a press conference,

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Speaker 4: Tate said, you know, lose one ranger, get another ranger.

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Speaker 4: What the hell that's what the Gold Coast is all about.

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Speaker 4: I don't understand.

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Speaker 1: He's so hashtagged at diversity. Yes quite Gold Coast.

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Speaker 4: Tom Tate did. But the Office of the Independent Assessor

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Speaker 4: we're not impressed in its determination. They said. While the

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Speaker 4: conduct may well be argued to be in jest or

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Speaker 4: intended to be humorous, it was considered that the term

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Speaker 4: ranger was still capable of being discriminatory and unreasonably causing

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Speaker 4: offence to particular groups. The complaint was also said to

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Speaker 4: raise various concerns about the use of the term, including

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Speaker 4: its reference to orangutanks.

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Speaker 1: The person who was called a ranger. Was not the

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Speaker 1: one that complained. It's because the mayor put this on

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Speaker 1: a light outed Facebook post with a picture of this

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Speaker 1: guy is made, I think, and other people complained about it.

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Speaker 4: So what do you think, ma'am? Do you think that

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Speaker 4: you have the right to call an employee a ranger

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Speaker 4: to their face?

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Speaker 1: I would never because I think you've got to listen

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Speaker 1: to the people who are the thing, the rangers. You

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Speaker 1: have to listen to the rang well, well, whatever happens

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Speaker 1: to me, whether you say something is offensive or not,

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Speaker 1: you kind of And also they're not a monolith. There's

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Speaker 1: lots of people with red hair who have different views.

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Speaker 1: All the people that I've spoken to speaking to think

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Speaker 1: it's fine and take it as a compliment. But I

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Speaker 1: think it's also how it's intended.

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Speaker 4: Speaking of, we are asked a few people in our

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Speaker 4: office who do have red hair. Maybe that's even offensive

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Speaker 4: to spot them out and say, can you tell us

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Speaker 4: what you think about this term? But we asked them

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Speaker 4: if they thought little terms maybe yeah, if the term

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Speaker 4: ranger is offensive, And here's what they said.

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Speaker 5: Not remotely. I'm very comfortable with being a ranger. I'm

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Speaker 5: very comfortable in my own skin about being a ranger.

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Speaker 5: I refer to myself as a ranger. However, it depends

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Speaker 5: who's saying it and in what context. So it's like

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Speaker 5: I wouldn't go around the office and say hello baldy

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Speaker 5: or hello big nose or whatever. So if I know

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Speaker 5: someone and they refer to me as a ranger, that's

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Speaker 5: absolutely fine.

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Speaker 3: But it's just common sense.

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Speaker 6: Well, on the one hand, I can see why, you know,

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Speaker 6: these kind of negative stereotypes like gingers being quick to anger.

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Speaker 6: I don't really want these dorogedy phrases flying around. But

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Speaker 6: then on the other I'm not a big fan of

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Speaker 6: linguistic policing in general, so this news does, of course

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Speaker 6: instantly send me into a fiery rage.

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Speaker 7: I don't care. I could not care less if someone

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Speaker 7: called me a ranger. It depends, Like somebody could say

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Speaker 7: you're a ranger, or like, oh, my friend who's a

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Speaker 7: ranger with warmth, and I'd be like, that's nice. But

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Speaker 7: if someone used it as like your ranger as an insult,

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Speaker 7: I'd be like, get a better insult.

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Speaker 8: Honestly, I don't mind. If someone wants to call me

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Speaker 8: a ranger. You can call me a ranger, you know,

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Speaker 8: It kind of depends on who the person is. If

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Speaker 8: you're going to say it in a disrespectful way, like

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Speaker 8: you know, it might not be appreciated. But also, like

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Speaker 8: Tim Minchin says, like only a ginger gets to call

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Speaker 8: another ginger ginger. So there's that too, Holly.

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Speaker 4: Would you use the term ranger?

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Speaker 2: No, I wouldn't, but I grew up in a ranger house.

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Speaker 2: Ranger is an Australian thing, right, We don't use it

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Speaker 2: in England. What you call red hair from England? A

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Speaker 2: ginger in England? Who call him the ginger?

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Speaker 4: And is it a term of endearment.

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Speaker 2: So it's very similar to ranger in that it can

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Speaker 2: be fine, but it can also be a little bit

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Speaker 2: if people are calling you a ginger x you know.

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Speaker 1: What I mean? Ah?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it can be Yes.

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Speaker 2: Yes, my dad had red hair, my brother had red hair.

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Speaker 2: My hair used to be quite red, and my kids

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Speaker 2: have red hair because there's also red hair on Brent's side.

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Speaker 2: And my daughter gets called ranger as her nickname at school.

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Speaker 1: Did she mind her?

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Speaker 2: I don't know that she loves it, but I think

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Speaker 2: she has decided to accept it as a term of endearment,

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Speaker 2: which I think is often what you do, don't you

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Speaker 2: when somebody starts calling you a name, and you decide

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Speaker 2: how you're going to handle it. But I think that's because,

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Speaker 2: as we discussed last week, she's called Matilda, and there

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Speaker 2: are about ten other Matilda's in her year, so they

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Speaker 2: all have a nickname, and so she is rang and Matilda.

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Speaker 4: I wouldn't use it. I don't think I've ever used

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Speaker 4: it to describe someone or at school. I think that

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Speaker 4: it could be seen as a bit of a derogatory

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Speaker 4: term to describe someone. I don't think it's on par

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Speaker 4: with sort of racist or homophobic language, like obviously that's

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Speaker 4: a different thing. I think it's funny that this has been.

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Speaker 1: A trigger warning.

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Speaker 2: In the workplace. She just can't comment on what people

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Speaker 2: look like. It's taken us a long time to get

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Speaker 2: me up to speed with that exactly.

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Speaker 1: Nice call you, blondie, until just reach because I couldn't

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Speaker 1: remember your name.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I want to talk about being dumped, and not

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Speaker 2: only because of Jlo, but also a little bit because

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Speaker 2: of Jaelo. As we talked about on Wednesday, this has

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Speaker 2: been the week that we were told officially what we

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Speaker 2: all have known for some time, which is the greatest

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Speaker 2: love story of our time, which was the rekindling, And

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Speaker 2: of course that's a whole movie called that. But the

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Speaker 2: rekindling of the love affair between Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck,

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Speaker 2: which originally started twenty years ago, culminated in getting married

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Speaker 2: again two years ago, not once, but twice, once in

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Speaker 2: Las Vegas, once in Georgia. She loves love, well, so

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Speaker 2: does he. I think it's fair to say. I've seen

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Speaker 2: that video of him Monrea when he is courting for

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Speaker 2: love from he loved sex. Yes, and they got back together,

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Speaker 2: and everybody was like, this is amazing, this is brilliant,

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Speaker 2: truelove's triumph, all of those things.

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Speaker 1: Why did they break up whole?

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Speaker 2: Well, I know why you think they broke up.

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Speaker 3: I pull it.

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Speaker 2: All very squarely.

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Speaker 1: Changed my mind.

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Speaker 2: I know Ben so well. It's definitely his fault.

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Speaker 1: I actually think it is. The easy read is that

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Speaker 1: she wanted to be in the spotlight. She turned their

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Speaker 1: relationship into content. She loved a red carpet. But none

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Speaker 1: of that's new. I actually think that maybe it was him.

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Speaker 1: He's well known to have suffered from addiction issues.

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Speaker 4: What makes you think, Holly, that Jlo was dumped. Well,

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Speaker 4: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: You're right.

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Speaker 2: I don't actually think that she was necessarily dumped. I

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Speaker 2: think she was probably like, we can't do this anymore.

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Speaker 2: But Ben affleck and again, this is such speculation, but

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Speaker 2: it probably pokes something in me and lots of women.

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Speaker 2: I know. He strikes me as the kind of guy

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Speaker 2: who he loves it and he hates it. He loves

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Speaker 2: it and he hates it.

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Speaker 3: Do you know what I mean?

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Speaker 2: He loves Jlo's jay lowness, but very often douchebag dudes.

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Speaker 2: I'm just going to say it. The thing that attracts

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Speaker 2: them to you is also the thing that repels them

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Speaker 2: from you. And I reckon that he thought he could

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Speaker 2: handle Jaelo, but he can't handle Jaylo.

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Speaker 3: He's just not up to it.

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Speaker 1: Her sun shines too brightly.

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Speaker 3: He's not mad.

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Speaker 4: I'm feeling very protective of my friend Jlo. I don't

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Speaker 4: know what happened, but emotionally, I feel like I'm gravitating

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Speaker 4: towards Jlo. I do, but I was apprehensive. I think

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Speaker 4: that when we tell our love story, the love story

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Speaker 4: of our life, to the world, the.

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Speaker 1: Greatest love story never told that we've told a lot.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, So I think that when we make our documentary,

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Speaker 4: and when we also make our film and our album

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Speaker 4: all about the love story, that it's bad to tell.

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Speaker 4: I think it's bad juju. There seems to be We've

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Speaker 4: talked about this before, an inverse correlation between how much

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Speaker 4: we declare our love from the rooftops and maybe what's

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Speaker 4: going on behind the scenes. I see this all the time,

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Speaker 4: and I just think we gotta be careful because once

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Speaker 4: we say I've found the love of my life, look

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Speaker 4: at me. I'm finally happy. My whole life has led

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Speaker 4: me to this moment to ben So can you say

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Speaker 4: that out loud? I just think you're tempting fate.

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Speaker 2: A source told people, and we all know that the

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Speaker 2: sources who speak to people are really the celebrities. She

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Speaker 2: tried really hard to make things work and is heartbroken,

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Speaker 2: and I believe that. I think Jalo is heartbroken. I've

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Speaker 2: seen her on a yacht this summer quite a lot,

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Speaker 2: this northern summer, quite a lot. She was looking great

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Speaker 2: in the swimsuit, drinking champagne on a yacht, but you

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Speaker 2: could see any sadness in her eyes.

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Speaker 1: What's interesting about Jlo is that I mean. The divorce

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Speaker 1: papers show that the separation occurred on April twenty sixth,

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Speaker 1: which was four months ago. She relaunched before she filed

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Speaker 1: for divorce. Because it's been very interesting the way she's

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Speaker 1: handled these few months. It's been summer in America, she's

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Speaker 1: gone to the Hamptons, and she's done a lot of papwalks. Now,

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Speaker 1: Jlo loves a papwalk. Nothing wrong with a papwalk. Explain

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Speaker 1: what a papwork is.

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Speaker 2: I might take issue that she's done a lot of papworks,

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Speaker 2: but a papwalk is like a deliberate showing for the

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Speaker 2: paparazzi where you either pre arrange it or you go

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Speaker 2: somewhere that you know they're going to be. So, you know,

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Speaker 2: if you're a famous person and you choose to go

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Speaker 2: to the hot spot in the Hampton's for lunch where

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Speaker 2: you know the photographers are going to be, then it's

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Speaker 2: a very deliberate showing. But also cameras follow Jaylo around,

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Speaker 2: especially right now while everyone thinks they're breaking up, they're like,

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Speaker 2: where's she wears he? Any day you open a celebrity website,

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Speaker 2: it'll say she's in La He's in New York. She's

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Speaker 2: in Rome, he's in Blah Like there's been a j

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Speaker 2: Loo Ben watch going on now for months.

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Speaker 1: That's true, but celebrities of that level like Taylor Swift,

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Speaker 1: Beyonce j Loo that perhaps only photograph you when you

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Speaker 1: want them to kind of you cannot away them. And

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Speaker 1: I'm not again, this sounds like I'm saying it's her

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Speaker 1: fault or I just think it's a really interesting strategy

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Speaker 1: and a very Jalo strategy, which I'm here for. She's

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Speaker 1: trying to take control of the narrative. That's why I

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Speaker 1: don't think it was her choice to end. I think

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Speaker 1: it was his fault. As much as breakups can be

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Speaker 1: one person's fault, sometimes they are. I think he crossed

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Speaker 1: a line, whether it was cheating, whether it was addiction.

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Speaker 1: I feel like maybe it was actually cheating, because I

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Speaker 1: think with addiction, maybe she hung in already. I mean,

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Speaker 1: we're literally gossiping stuff up.

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Speaker 4: You don't think though, because this is going to be

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Speaker 4: the dominant narrative everyone pedals, and that we've heard from

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Speaker 4: the beginning is that poor Ben doesn't like the spotlight.

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Speaker 1: He is such a misogynistic narrative that I was part of,

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Speaker 1: and I have regrets.

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Speaker 2: I do exactly what he was getting. Yeah, he waited

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Speaker 2: us seventeen years ago, and that was the narrative that

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Speaker 2: he spun over why they broke.

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Speaker 3: Up that time.

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Speaker 4: But and this is what that narrative will say. Even

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Speaker 4: Jlo was like, we're going to do it differently this time.

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Speaker 4: We learned a lot of lessons. It was the media

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Speaker 4: that split us. That's what they both said about last time.

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Speaker 4: And then then was on a podcast recently, like in

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Speaker 4: the last month six weeks where he said, you can

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Speaker 4: photograph me, you can photograph j Loo, but when you

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Speaker 4: photograph my kids, you're crossing the line. He basically said

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Speaker 4: that that was really upsetting him at the moment. So

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Speaker 4: there will be a story and what we're essentially calling

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Speaker 4: Jalo in that narrative as an attention seeker except.

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Speaker 1: That his kids, and you're right, that was one of

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Speaker 1: the narratives, except that his kids, who were very publicly

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Speaker 1: with j Loo in the Hamptons since the breakup, and

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Speaker 1: they also don't need to be photographed if they don't

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Speaker 1: want to. So it's been really interesting watching everybody give

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Speaker 1: their message by what photos they're in, where they are,

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Speaker 1: who they're with.

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Speaker 2: I'm not a poor Ben guy. I think he's a

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Speaker 2: very talented, very tortured, probable pain in the ass to

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Speaker 2: live with, like Jennifer Garner, like there is no one

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Speaker 2: more delightful on the planet.

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Speaker 1: What about that quote that she gave about him? And

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Speaker 1: she's been very discreet since the divorce, but she said,

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Speaker 1: to paraphrase, when Ben shines his light on you, it's

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Speaker 1: warm and beautiful, but it's very cold in the shade. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: And also the other thing about the narrative about the

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Speaker 2: fame is it suggesse he has no agency, Like we

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Speaker 2: keep talking about that documentary. He was a co producer

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Speaker 2: on that documentary about their relationship. He chose to be

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Speaker 2: in it. He didn't have to do any of that.

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Speaker 2: As if we really think he was surprised to walk

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Speaker 2: into his house and see them going through his love

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Speaker 2: lit like, I don't buy it. Anyway, I have.

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Speaker 4: One more question to ask just on Jloh and Ben,

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Speaker 4: because everything we know about relationships is through the prism

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Speaker 4: of benefit. I think we can agree that's true. And

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Speaker 4: the age old question is does anyone ever really change?

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Speaker 4: Because that was what everyone thought, is that they were

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Speaker 4: each other's the love of their life. I heard that

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Speaker 4: from their own mouth. The media broke them up the

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Speaker 4: first time the second time, this was meant to mean.

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Speaker 4: What we all learned from that was people can change.

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Speaker 4: Maybe your ex is the love of your life.

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Speaker 1: I think they have amazing sex, and I think that

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Speaker 1: that can pluster over a lot, and it can also

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Speaker 1: make you think that you feel a way that you

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Speaker 1: don't or that you can overcome things that you perhaps

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Speaker 1: couldn't before. The sex can be confusing.

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Speaker 2: Georgia for the sex, like I don't buy.

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Speaker 1: No, but I think it makes them think and feel

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Speaker 1: a whole lot of things. But then eventually you're not

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Speaker 1: having sex three times a day, and you've probably had

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Speaker 1: some ut eyes, and you know, you can see things

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Speaker 1: more clearly.

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Speaker 2: Let's get away from the UTIs and back to celebrity

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Speaker 2: break up wisdom. So a little story for out louders.

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Speaker 3: One of the very.

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Speaker 2: Talented people who works here at Mama Mia. She's called

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Speaker 2: Live James. She was a social producer and she was

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Speaker 2: at the logis on Sunday night. As you may have

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Speaker 2: heard me or what she's barely talked about it. I

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Speaker 2: don't know if you would know, but Live James was

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Speaker 2: on the Red carpet, and unfortunately for Live, something had

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Speaker 2: happened to her that morning that was not what she

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Speaker 2: was expecting. Here's Live telling us what happened to her

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Speaker 2: the morning of the logies.

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Speaker 9: Okay, so basically, I was in this situationship with a

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Speaker 9: guy that I'd been seeing for a little while and

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Speaker 9: it was, you know, everything was going smoothly, but then

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Speaker 9: it came to this abrupt ending that was quite brutal

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Speaker 9: on the morning of the logis and I still had

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Speaker 9: to rock up to work, and I thought to myself,

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Speaker 9: what can I ask these celebrities that can help me

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Speaker 9: and other people? And I was like, I'm just gonna

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Speaker 9: ask them about my heartbreak, and then the head of

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Speaker 9: entertainment was like, you should just tell them the story.

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Speaker 9: So I was like, okay, and then all these celebrities

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Speaker 9: started looking at me really like with the saddest eyes

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Speaker 9: I've ever seen, honestly, but I got some good advice

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Speaker 9: and ten worth it.

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Speaker 3: So liv decided to ask.

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Speaker 2: Because she's a professional, I need to put on the

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Speaker 2: record speaking of Ben Affleck, douchebag move to dump your

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Speaker 2: girlfriend on the morning of a very big professional so true.

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Speaker 4: She had the logis that night could you not wait

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Speaker 4: until the next but you could have.

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Speaker 2: That's a bit of a narcissistic thing to do, anyway, live.

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Speaker 4: That person has been dragged by every possibly should.

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Speaker 2: This poor person anyway? So liv asked the famous people

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Speaker 2: their advice to get over heartbreak. I hope Jayla's listening

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Speaker 2: to this. Here's some of what the famous people said.

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Speaker 1: You're so much as my daughter.

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Speaker 4: Sious relationship at five. Do not look at another person

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Speaker 4: until you're thirty five minimum.

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Speaker 2: From what you learn from it, and if you grow

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Speaker 2: from it, that's awesome.

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Speaker 3: Don't take your baggage.

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Speaker 8: Into the next one.

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Speaker 10: Does run up this guy that's just letting me up

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Speaker 10: there tonight. Yeah, I'll be short term sad. And it's

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Speaker 10: nice to be short term sad if it meant something

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Speaker 10: to you.

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Speaker 3: If you're not.

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Speaker 10: Sad means the relationship meant nothing, which is actually a

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Speaker 10: terrible thing.

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Speaker 1: Do you know what. It always feels like shit now,

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Speaker 1: but it just gets better. I've got a quote from

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Speaker 1: Winston Churchill.

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Speaker 4: If you ever find yourself going through hell, just keep going.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, worthy of you.

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Speaker 8: You do your thing, You treat yourself fine, and you

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Speaker 8: get on the flow.

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Speaker 10: That's something you don't want to hear time see the

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Speaker 10: only thing in my experience.

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Speaker 1: They're really here.

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Speaker 2: So James Stewart is the last voice you heard there,

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Speaker 2: who was walking in a very benefit moment. He was

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Speaker 2: walking the red carpet for the first time with Aida

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Speaker 2: Nicodemi on his arm. Who's in that ladder? Hiada? She

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Speaker 2: was very excited to see live and they gave some

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Speaker 2: good advice. What he said after that, though, was something

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Speaker 2: about getting drunk, which I think is also fine. Do

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Speaker 2: celebrities know a lot about break up wisdom? Were the

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Speaker 2: best there? And what would yours be? Mare freedom?

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Speaker 1: The advice that I gave live at the Logis where

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Speaker 1: I was.

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Speaker 4: Was as a famous person, as a celebrity. Some might

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Speaker 4: say the.

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Speaker 1: Only interview I did no one else did, and it's

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Speaker 1: only because I'm live boss and ask me questions. But

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Speaker 1: the advice I gave was you get a fringe.

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Speaker 3: I'm glad you didn't say that.

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Speaker 2: You should have done locked at a Really seriously, did

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Speaker 2: you need to bring your personal life?

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Speaker 1: That's like true boundaries leave boundaries. I yes, said get

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Speaker 1: a fringe and get a haircut due and also buy

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Speaker 1: clothes for your feelings, because I think when you look

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Speaker 1: in the mirror. You want to see someone different to

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Speaker 1: the person who was in that relationship and who got dumped,

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Speaker 1: and I think that that is always a good thing.

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Speaker 4: I need to prosecute the hair comment because I reckon

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Speaker 4: if you go to the hairdresser, we don't get a

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Speaker 4: fringe and you say, give me a fringe and give

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Speaker 4: me a pixie cart, I think the hairdresser is legally

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Speaker 4: obliged to say, have you been doump in the last

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Speaker 4: twenty four to forty eight hours, and if you say yes,

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Speaker 4: and they have to say.

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Speaker 1: No, I think you just need to say, very good point, Jess.

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Speaker 1: You need to say I need a break up, haircut

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00:18:16,927 --> 00:18:19,367
Speaker 1: and a hairdress A good hairdresser understands what that means.

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Speaker 1: It understands explicitly, not give me a pixie cut or

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Speaker 1: a fringe. I was joking about the fringe kind of

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Speaker 1: but it means that you need to glow up.

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Speaker 2: Buy some clothes for your feelings is the most mere

402
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Speaker 2: Friedman sentence I've ever heard, and I really like it.

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Speaker 1: I get that some people eat their feelings. I buy

404
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Speaker 1: clothes for my feelings.

405
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Speaker 3: My advice to.

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Speaker 2: Live, not that she asked. I'm not famous enough but

407
00:18:43,447 --> 00:18:46,327
Speaker 2: would be to wallow. My thing is like, you get

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Speaker 2: a wallowing window, and I think that how long that

409
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Speaker 2: is is dependent on how long the relationship was. So

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Speaker 2: if it's a four week situationship, you get like an

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Speaker 2: advent calendar sized window, like a teeny window.

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Speaker 1: Like four hours, Like what do you think like a week?

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Speaker 2: Maybe?

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Speaker 1: Because four weeks that's twenty five percent.

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Speaker 4: I disagree with you on this, continue and then I will.

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Speaker 1: Like you're married for five years.

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Speaker 2: When I say wallowing, I'm talking about you know, not

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Speaker 2: getting out of your pajamas, maybe drinking too much, maybe

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Speaker 2: ordering lots of food in eating chocolate, and crucially talking

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Speaker 2: your friend's ears off. They give you this window, I

421
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Speaker 2: think of a certain amount of time that they have

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Speaker 2: to tolerate, that it's part of the contract of your relationship,

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Speaker 2: and then at one point they have to cut it off.

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Speaker 2: And I reckon, if you've been married for ten years,

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Speaker 2: you get like a huge picture window sized space like months,

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Speaker 2: possibly years really of wallowing time.

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Speaker 1: It gets to a point where you're like, okay, it's

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Speaker 1: time to move on.

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Speaker 2: Now you have to just take that pain and shove

430
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Speaker 2: it really really far down, really suppress it, turn it

431
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Speaker 2: into a hard little pebble that you can say throw

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Speaker 2: like a kidney.

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Speaker 1: Stone that you have to we out of your WII home.

434
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Speaker 4: Manchester.

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Speaker 1: They really hurt a lot when you pass the kidneys

436
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Speaker 1: and they're gone and you feel sober and you can

437
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Speaker 1: keep them in a jar, maybe a roof with like

438
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Speaker 1: experiences I lived through on the jar.

439
00:20:09,287 --> 00:20:11,127
Speaker 4: Heartbreak is not like a kidney stone, not even a

440
00:20:11,167 --> 00:20:11,567
Speaker 4: little bit.

441
00:20:12,047 --> 00:20:12,927
Speaker 1: He wrote a whole book.

442
00:20:13,007 --> 00:20:14,287
Speaker 4: I wrote, I'm the expert.

443
00:20:15,007 --> 00:20:18,567
Speaker 2: You are the actually forgot that I am. But they

444
00:20:18,607 --> 00:20:20,127
Speaker 2: were quite serious breaker.

445
00:20:20,287 --> 00:20:25,727
Speaker 4: Well, Holly, if you'll recall, at the end of that book,

446
00:20:26,087 --> 00:20:28,207
Speaker 4: I wrote about a heartbreak that I experienced and guess

447
00:20:28,247 --> 00:20:31,167
Speaker 4: what it was a situation ship. It was one of

448
00:20:31,207 --> 00:20:33,647
Speaker 4: the worst heartbreaks I ever had, was with someone I

449
00:20:33,767 --> 00:20:34,727
Speaker 4: wasn't with for very long.

450
00:20:34,767 --> 00:20:35,847
Speaker 1: Why is that? Do you think?

451
00:20:36,367 --> 00:20:40,447
Speaker 4: My theory is that you only have hope, you only

452
00:20:40,567 --> 00:20:44,207
Speaker 4: have how you imagined it to be, and you're at

453
00:20:44,247 --> 00:20:47,287
Speaker 4: that early stage of infatuation where you've started playing out

454
00:20:47,447 --> 00:20:49,447
Speaker 4: all of the amazing things that are going to happen,

455
00:20:49,887 --> 00:20:51,727
Speaker 4: and then when you sit there to be like, oh,

456
00:20:51,967 --> 00:20:53,287
Speaker 4: I'm now going to write the list of all the

457
00:20:53,327 --> 00:20:55,367
Speaker 4: things I hate, You've got none because you never knew

458
00:20:55,367 --> 00:20:55,927
Speaker 4: them well enough.

459
00:20:56,007 --> 00:20:59,247
Speaker 2: You're letting go of a dream relationship rather than a

460
00:20:59,287 --> 00:21:01,847
Speaker 2: relationship itself, where it's like I love Luca.

461
00:21:01,927 --> 00:21:03,567
Speaker 4: If we broke up tomorrow, I could write a long

462
00:21:03,607 --> 00:21:08,887
Speaker 4: list of things. Yeah, So there's more like fodder for

463
00:21:08,967 --> 00:21:10,567
Speaker 4: my breakup to.

464
00:21:10,927 --> 00:21:13,567
Speaker 2: So, as the person who wrote the book on heartbreak,

465
00:21:13,647 --> 00:21:15,967
Speaker 2: Jesse Stevens, what's your advice for live?

466
00:21:16,527 --> 00:21:20,087
Speaker 4: My advice is that you need to have some sort

467
00:21:20,087 --> 00:21:22,927
Speaker 4: of ritual because my problem with heartbreak is that it

468
00:21:22,967 --> 00:21:24,447
Speaker 4: is a type of grief that we don't have any

469
00:21:24,527 --> 00:21:28,167
Speaker 4: ritual force. So yes, and when there's grief, in the

470
00:21:28,207 --> 00:21:32,447
Speaker 4: case of a funeral, that's a very specific experience that

471
00:21:32,487 --> 00:21:35,127
Speaker 4: people rally around you. You wear a specific outfit, yeah,

472
00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:37,087
Speaker 4: and you go to a thief for your feelings. And

473
00:21:37,567 --> 00:21:39,647
Speaker 4: I wasn't thinking of the outfit. I was more thinking

474
00:21:39,727 --> 00:21:42,967
Speaker 4: of the church or the ceremony. But yeah, you also

475
00:21:43,007 --> 00:21:47,967
Speaker 4: wear an outfit. But with the breakup, it's the grief

476
00:21:48,207 --> 00:21:51,847
Speaker 4: compounded with the rejection. It's that they don't want you

477
00:21:51,887 --> 00:21:53,607
Speaker 4: anymore and they're going to live their life over here.

478
00:21:53,647 --> 00:21:54,967
Speaker 4: They just don't want you to be a part of it,

479
00:21:55,007 --> 00:21:58,047
Speaker 4: which is a different type of pain. So I think

480
00:21:58,047 --> 00:21:59,727
Speaker 4: you need some sort of ritual. And that's where the

481
00:21:59,767 --> 00:22:02,647
Speaker 4: hair thing comes in. Right, Yes, go and get the haircut. Yes,

482
00:22:02,687 --> 00:22:04,847
Speaker 4: maybe go get your clothes, write your list of everything

483
00:22:04,887 --> 00:22:09,487
Speaker 4: you hate about them, right, journals, rite whatever, And so

484
00:22:10,527 --> 00:22:12,527
Speaker 4: I always think, and this is I'm back to j

485
00:22:12,647 --> 00:22:14,647
Speaker 4: Lo a little bit, right, because Jaylo is sitting there

486
00:22:14,727 --> 00:22:18,247
Speaker 4: right now weeping. Going. Ben and I had some really

487
00:22:18,247 --> 00:22:19,887
Speaker 4: good times, and.

488
00:22:20,127 --> 00:22:22,447
Speaker 1: You know, I think she's angry and defiant now. Yes,

489
00:22:22,527 --> 00:22:24,247
Speaker 1: I think she's past the weeping. True.

490
00:22:24,247 --> 00:22:27,087
Speaker 4: Okay, two months ago she was like not a lot

491
00:22:27,087 --> 00:22:29,927
Speaker 4: of weeping. Yes, Matt Garla Knight. She went home and

492
00:22:29,967 --> 00:22:33,807
Speaker 4: she just went Remember our wedding in Vegas. What a

493
00:22:33,807 --> 00:22:36,007
Speaker 4: lovely night. And it was because I was with Ben.

494
00:22:36,007 --> 00:22:37,767
Speaker 4: And I'm not going to have those fun times anymore.

495
00:22:37,807 --> 00:22:39,647
Speaker 4: Because Ben is no longer with me.

496
00:22:39,727 --> 00:22:41,407
Speaker 1: My heart's broken again again.

497
00:22:41,447 --> 00:22:44,247
Speaker 2: Ben actually posted social media that night he was getting

498
00:22:44,287 --> 00:22:46,287
Speaker 2: changed into his tux at a toilet. He doesn't normally

499
00:22:46,287 --> 00:22:48,727
Speaker 2: do that. She would have been like, he posted social

500
00:22:48,767 --> 00:22:50,887
Speaker 2: media for me exactly, and look what happened.

501
00:22:50,927 --> 00:22:54,367
Speaker 1: The humiliation though, there's humiliation in every breakup, really, or

502
00:22:54,407 --> 00:22:57,287
Speaker 1: a sense of failure or rejection if you're the one

503
00:22:57,527 --> 00:23:00,647
Speaker 1: who's been dumped Jesse, do you think that idea of

504
00:23:00,687 --> 00:23:02,647
Speaker 1: writing a list is actually a good thing of all

505
00:23:02,647 --> 00:23:06,247
Speaker 1: the reasons. You remember Dolly Algiston's good material about a breakup,

506
00:23:06,287 --> 00:23:08,727
Speaker 1: and the ongoing thing in that book is writing a

507
00:23:08,767 --> 00:23:10,727
Speaker 1: list of all all the reasons that it's good that

508
00:23:10,767 --> 00:23:11,927
Speaker 1: you've been broken up with.

509
00:23:12,127 --> 00:23:14,687
Speaker 4: Yes, well, and all the things that weren't right, because

510
00:23:15,127 --> 00:23:17,007
Speaker 4: it's breaking up. If you really think about it, there

511
00:23:17,007 --> 00:23:19,607
Speaker 4: are absolutely reasons it wasn't right. But when you look

512
00:23:19,607 --> 00:23:21,847
Speaker 4: back on those positive memories, you've got to remember that

513
00:23:21,887 --> 00:23:24,247
Speaker 4: you were there too, that you were part of those memories,

514
00:23:24,247 --> 00:23:26,287
Speaker 4: and you're still here so you can still have fun,

515
00:23:26,327 --> 00:23:29,247
Speaker 4: and whether it's with another person. Like last time Jaylo

516
00:23:29,407 --> 00:23:31,807
Speaker 4: was in Paris, she had dinner under the Eiffel Tower

517
00:23:31,807 --> 00:23:33,207
Speaker 4: with Ben. I don't want you to ask me how

518
00:23:33,247 --> 00:23:34,687
Speaker 4: I know about, but I do, and I know that

519
00:23:34,727 --> 00:23:37,127
Speaker 4: Ben cried and he was a bit he was a

520
00:23:37,167 --> 00:23:39,967
Speaker 4: bit of a wet blanket on that trip. Jaylo needs

521
00:23:40,167 --> 00:23:42,407
Speaker 4: to reclaim Paris. She needs to go back to Paris.

522
00:23:42,687 --> 00:23:44,847
Speaker 4: She needs to have a cocktail under the Eiffel Tower

523
00:23:45,327 --> 00:23:49,487
Speaker 4: with her girlfriends Jane Fonder, perhaps with Noah Trevor.

524
00:23:49,247 --> 00:23:52,327
Speaker 2: With her Clever Counsel with Trevor Noah Celestial Counsel.

525
00:23:52,447 --> 00:23:56,447
Speaker 4: Exactly, bring them with your friends, like Malone post Malone

526
00:23:56,487 --> 00:23:57,447
Speaker 4: can come true.

527
00:23:57,607 --> 00:23:59,967
Speaker 1: What do you think you two about the advice that

528
00:24:00,007 --> 00:24:01,927
Speaker 1: the best way to get over someone needs to get

529
00:24:02,007 --> 00:24:02,767
Speaker 1: under someone else.

530
00:24:02,807 --> 00:24:04,767
Speaker 4: I don't think it's the most terrible advice in the world.

531
00:24:04,847 --> 00:24:05,527
Speaker 3: Look, I mean.

532
00:24:06,927 --> 00:24:10,447
Speaker 2: It's an effective strategy, but it's a risky because sometimes

533
00:24:10,527 --> 00:24:13,647
Speaker 2: you just transfer to in print you in print or

534
00:24:13,967 --> 00:24:16,207
Speaker 2: the other thing that happens is that next day when

535
00:24:16,207 --> 00:24:18,607
Speaker 2: that person's left, you're like, oh, I'm still here in

536
00:24:18,647 --> 00:24:21,007
Speaker 2: this pain and that was fun for a minute, but

537
00:24:21,367 --> 00:24:22,367
Speaker 2: now yeah.

538
00:24:22,447 --> 00:24:25,607
Speaker 4: So two things I reckon. You've got to be careful.

539
00:24:25,607 --> 00:24:27,407
Speaker 1: It's so bad if you cry during the sex.

540
00:24:27,687 --> 00:24:30,327
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah. And sometimes it's really bad sex the first

541
00:24:30,327 --> 00:24:33,887
Speaker 4: time you've had the sex, So you probably don't have

542
00:24:34,007 --> 00:24:36,607
Speaker 4: the strength to be rejected again. That's what I found.

543
00:24:36,607 --> 00:24:38,567
Speaker 4: So I would be like, I'm going on the apps.

544
00:24:38,967 --> 00:24:41,727
Speaker 4: I need attention, and then the attention feels good, and

545
00:24:41,767 --> 00:24:43,927
Speaker 4: then if that attention goes, you're like, oh, no, I

546
00:24:43,967 --> 00:24:46,447
Speaker 4: did not sign up to be rejected again. I can't

547
00:24:46,447 --> 00:24:50,007
Speaker 4: handle that. And the other thing is don't then and

548
00:24:50,047 --> 00:24:52,727
Speaker 4: I've done this because I'm desperate for attention and validation

549
00:24:52,767 --> 00:24:55,687
Speaker 4: because I have no self esteem left. Is I strink

550
00:24:55,727 --> 00:24:58,647
Speaker 4: someone along and treat them like shit? Yeah, so, j Lo,

551
00:24:59,327 --> 00:25:02,767
Speaker 4: don't go find someone who you're going to kind of

552
00:25:02,807 --> 00:25:05,167
Speaker 4: project all your traumas onto. Does she need a Pete

553
00:25:05,247 --> 00:25:05,967
Speaker 4: Davidson moment?

554
00:25:06,287 --> 00:25:08,007
Speaker 2: I think it would be great if she had a

555
00:25:08,047 --> 00:25:10,327
Speaker 2: Pete Davidson moment, because she would get.

556
00:25:10,167 --> 00:25:14,087
Speaker 1: Engaged to Pete davidson'll probably marry him. She can't be stopped.

557
00:25:14,087 --> 00:25:16,727
Speaker 1: She gets engaged to everybody. Remember when she was engaged

558
00:25:16,767 --> 00:25:21,287
Speaker 1: to the backup dancer that was actually a backup dancer,

559
00:25:21,527 --> 00:25:23,487
Speaker 1: and then she got like engaged I think, to the

560
00:25:23,527 --> 00:25:26,447
Speaker 1: other backup dancer, and that was bad.

561
00:25:26,687 --> 00:25:28,367
Speaker 2: She likes jewelry, she.

562
00:25:28,327 --> 00:25:31,687
Speaker 4: Loves love, and there's no rule about how many times

563
00:25:31,687 --> 00:25:32,807
Speaker 4: you can I can't get engaged.

564
00:25:32,887 --> 00:25:35,287
Speaker 2: I Also, what I really like about Liv's story is

565
00:25:35,327 --> 00:25:38,047
Speaker 2: how seriously all those celebrities took it, like Andy Lee

566
00:25:38,087 --> 00:25:41,127
Speaker 2: with his thing and James Stewart about his thing about time,

567
00:25:41,327 --> 00:25:42,807
Speaker 2: like they really were there for live.

568
00:25:43,047 --> 00:25:44,887
Speaker 4: You know what also helps when you're in the depths

569
00:25:44,927 --> 00:25:48,287
Speaker 4: of heartbreak. He's remembering that even the celebrities the glitzy,

570
00:25:48,567 --> 00:25:52,607
Speaker 4: the glamorous, the rich among us get dumped, and sometimes

571
00:25:52,647 --> 00:25:54,567
Speaker 4: I like to think about I'm sure Miranda Kurr's been

572
00:25:54,607 --> 00:25:59,247
Speaker 4: dumped in which case happens to the most beautiful among us,

573
00:25:59,367 --> 00:26:01,807
Speaker 4: and therefore we can all get over it.

574
00:26:01,847 --> 00:26:05,047
Speaker 2: Out louders, have you got any excellent heartbreak advice? What

575
00:26:05,247 --> 00:26:08,967
Speaker 2: actually helps you get over getting dumped? We will send

576
00:26:09,007 --> 00:26:11,807
Speaker 2: all your advice to JLO, because I'm sure any minute

577
00:26:11,807 --> 00:26:13,807
Speaker 2: now we're going to get an on the JLO newsletter

578
00:26:13,847 --> 00:26:16,447
Speaker 2: from her and we can just send it in that reply.

579
00:26:21,367 --> 00:26:22,167
Speaker 6: The hell out.

580
00:26:26,447 --> 00:26:28,807
Speaker 4: It's Friday, so we want to help set up your

581
00:26:28,847 --> 00:26:33,007
Speaker 4: weekend with our very best recommendations. Maya, you have a book.

582
00:26:33,487 --> 00:26:36,087
Speaker 1: Yeah, I started reading a book. So friend of the

583
00:26:36,087 --> 00:26:39,247
Speaker 1: pot Emelia Lester, texted me a picture of a book

584
00:26:39,247 --> 00:26:42,207
Speaker 1: cover and said best book cover at in ages and

585
00:26:42,727 --> 00:26:44,967
Speaker 1: I just need people to tell me what to read.

586
00:26:45,127 --> 00:26:48,407
Speaker 1: So I immediately downloaded it onto my Kindle and as soon

587
00:26:48,447 --> 00:26:50,647
Speaker 1: as I saw the cover, I thought, I'm gonna hate this.

588
00:26:50,727 --> 00:26:53,207
Speaker 1: It looks really cheesy, which is something that you two

589
00:26:53,207 --> 00:26:55,847
Speaker 1: would know about, because it had a particular type of

590
00:26:55,887 --> 00:26:59,247
Speaker 1: cover that felt very sort of two years ago. It

591
00:26:59,407 --> 00:27:02,407
Speaker 1: had like an illustration of a girl lying on a bed,

592
00:27:02,447 --> 00:27:04,887
Speaker 1: and the book was called Margo's Got Money Trouble, and

593
00:27:04,927 --> 00:27:09,727
Speaker 1: it just read like a sort of a daggy rom

594
00:27:09,887 --> 00:27:13,767
Speaker 1: cheesy thing that I wouldn't usually like because I'm so smart.

595
00:27:13,767 --> 00:27:15,287
Speaker 1: I'm not as smart as you. You I don't read

596
00:27:15,327 --> 00:27:21,367
Speaker 1: anything literally, but I also just needed something a little grittier. Anyway,

597
00:27:21,527 --> 00:27:25,367
Speaker 1: it turns out it is so good and so interesting.

598
00:27:26,007 --> 00:27:29,407
Speaker 1: It is about a young woman who gets pregnant unexpectedly.

599
00:27:30,047 --> 00:27:32,447
Speaker 1: I think she's like eighteen or nineteen, and it happens

600
00:27:32,487 --> 00:27:34,887
Speaker 1: right at the beginning, so that's not a spoiler. And

601
00:27:35,247 --> 00:27:38,487
Speaker 1: her dad is a retired wrestler and her mum is

602
00:27:38,527 --> 00:27:42,127
Speaker 1: a retired hoo does waitress. She's got no money, and

603
00:27:42,207 --> 00:27:44,047
Speaker 1: so what she has to do is start an only

604
00:27:44,087 --> 00:27:48,567
Speaker 1: fans to support herself and her baby. And it's interesting.

605
00:27:48,607 --> 00:27:51,687
Speaker 1: It plays with first person, second person, third person, so

606
00:27:51,727 --> 00:27:54,767
Speaker 1: it's just written in a really clever, interesting way, and

607
00:27:55,407 --> 00:27:58,087
Speaker 1: it's just a good easy page turn. I'm really liking it.

608
00:27:58,127 --> 00:28:00,127
Speaker 4: Sounds great, Holly, what's your recommendation?

609
00:28:00,367 --> 00:28:03,167
Speaker 2: So I'm going back to back on Lee's sales recommendations.

610
00:28:03,247 --> 00:28:05,767
Speaker 2: Last week I recommended her Australian story isn't it cave?

611
00:28:05,847 --> 00:28:08,647
Speaker 2: So Apologies, Lee Sales, I'm sure you're listening to the show.

612
00:28:09,247 --> 00:28:11,847
Speaker 2: Why am I so obsessed with you? Anyway? This show

613
00:28:12,047 --> 00:28:14,527
Speaker 2: is called The Assembly and it's on ABC and it

614
00:28:14,607 --> 00:28:17,327
Speaker 2: launched this week. It's on iView.

615
00:28:20,167 --> 00:28:21,247
Speaker 1: Testing one, two three.

616
00:28:21,367 --> 00:28:24,887
Speaker 6: For the first time in Australia, artistics students are undertaking

617
00:28:24,967 --> 00:28:28,047
Speaker 6: an artism and friendly in deduction to a journalism.

618
00:28:28,087 --> 00:28:31,007
Speaker 1: Of course, they will be mentored by one of Australia's

619
00:28:31,047 --> 00:28:34,247
Speaker 1: best journalists. This is a chance to work with people

620
00:28:34,287 --> 00:28:35,967
Speaker 1: who haven't really had a voice in media.

621
00:28:36,127 --> 00:28:40,487
Speaker 3: The students will interview some of Australia's most famous people. Hello.

622
00:28:41,207 --> 00:28:44,007
Speaker 1: Our rules are no subjects are out of bounds, no

623
00:28:44,127 --> 00:28:46,367
Speaker 1: questions are off the table, and anything can happen.

624
00:28:46,407 --> 00:28:50,767
Speaker 2: Welcome to the Assembly. It's really interesting. It's like a

625
00:28:50,807 --> 00:28:53,967
Speaker 2: documentary series. It's set at Macquarie UNI and it's a

626
00:28:53,967 --> 00:28:57,007
Speaker 2: group of students who have autism and they are getting

627
00:28:57,167 --> 00:29:01,447
Speaker 2: journalistic tutoring from the one the only Le Sales right,

628
00:29:01,727 --> 00:29:05,687
Speaker 2: And every episode they interview as famous person and Lee

629
00:29:05,847 --> 00:29:08,407
Speaker 2: helps them workshop their questions how they're going to ask them,

630
00:29:08,647 --> 00:29:10,447
Speaker 2: and then the fame this person comes into the ABC

631
00:29:11,007 --> 00:29:14,167
Speaker 2: and this group of want to be journalists interviews them, right.

632
00:29:14,847 --> 00:29:16,247
Speaker 4: That's such a good idea.

633
00:29:16,327 --> 00:29:19,607
Speaker 2: And the thing that's really interesting about it is is

634
00:29:19,647 --> 00:29:23,967
Speaker 2: the group of students with autism are very diverse, as

635
00:29:24,167 --> 00:29:27,647
Speaker 2: the spectrum would suggest, lots of different kinds of presentations,

636
00:29:27,687 --> 00:29:30,247
Speaker 2: dealing with things in different ways. But one of the

637
00:29:30,247 --> 00:29:32,487
Speaker 2: things that they all do have in common with these

638
00:29:32,567 --> 00:29:35,927
Speaker 2: questions is that they're just asking whatever they want. So

639
00:29:36,727 --> 00:29:40,607
Speaker 2: in this first one they interview Sam Neil, very famous actor.

640
00:29:41,047 --> 00:29:42,447
Speaker 2: Some of them don't know who he is and they're

641
00:29:42,447 --> 00:29:46,607
Speaker 2: happy to say so. But also there's a guy there

642
00:29:46,647 --> 00:29:48,767
Speaker 2: who really does know who he is because of Jurassic Park,

643
00:29:48,807 --> 00:29:51,367
Speaker 2: so who brings all his dinosaurs to show Sam Neil,

644
00:29:51,407 --> 00:29:53,727
Speaker 2: and Sam Neil has to be like oh, and then

645
00:29:53,767 --> 00:29:56,647
Speaker 2: they ask him questions. And it's just so interesting because

646
00:29:56,687 --> 00:29:59,607
Speaker 2: a bit like that you can't ask that. There are

647
00:29:59,607 --> 00:30:02,247
Speaker 2: some moments in it that make you really uncomfortable. And

648
00:30:02,287 --> 00:30:04,647
Speaker 2: then it follows some of the they're all young adults,

649
00:30:04,647 --> 00:30:07,167
Speaker 2: so they're all like sort of twenty ish. It follows

650
00:30:07,167 --> 00:30:08,847
Speaker 2: some of them home and you get some backstory and

651
00:30:08,887 --> 00:30:10,407
Speaker 2: all of the kind of thing. And I assume that

652
00:30:10,487 --> 00:30:12,167
Speaker 2: over the series you're going to get to know more

653
00:30:12,167 --> 00:30:15,207
Speaker 2: of them, and he's Lee Les in it all, and

654
00:30:15,247 --> 00:30:17,687
Speaker 2: she's in the room and she's so warm and funny

655
00:30:17,687 --> 00:30:20,847
Speaker 2: and smart. One of the students says to Sam Neil,

656
00:30:20,967 --> 00:30:24,847
Speaker 2: you're single and we know you like Australian journalists because

657
00:30:24,887 --> 00:30:28,927
Speaker 2: he'd recently dated Laura Tingle. Right, there's a single Australian

658
00:30:28,967 --> 00:30:32,007
Speaker 2: journalists here today. Why don't you at least sales come together?

659
00:30:32,567 --> 00:30:34,807
Speaker 3: Oh that is so good. That's so good.

660
00:30:34,847 --> 00:30:36,847
Speaker 2: And then there's another journalist who asked this question that

661
00:30:36,847 --> 00:30:39,847
Speaker 2: makes him cry about his parents, and he's very Sam

662
00:30:39,887 --> 00:30:42,887
Speaker 2: Neil is very He's been going through cancer treatment. He's

663
00:30:42,927 --> 00:30:45,607
Speaker 2: really living with quite serious cancer and he's very honest

664
00:30:45,607 --> 00:30:49,127
Speaker 2: about that. That's going chemotherapy. It's so interesting and you know,

665
00:30:49,487 --> 00:30:52,567
Speaker 2: just without it being like a worthy thing that you

666
00:30:52,767 --> 00:30:54,727
Speaker 2: kind of get beaten over the head with, it's just

667
00:30:54,847 --> 00:30:59,247
Speaker 2: so interesting and engaging to see these people who you

668
00:30:59,367 --> 00:31:03,167
Speaker 2: might have preconceived ideas about how these young people with

669
00:31:03,287 --> 00:31:05,487
Speaker 2: autism might act, and.

670
00:31:05,487 --> 00:31:06,407
Speaker 3: It's just not like that.

671
00:31:06,487 --> 00:31:08,487
Speaker 2: It's just really interesting anyway. I love it. It's called

672
00:31:08,487 --> 00:31:11,047
Speaker 2: the Assembly. The guest they've got coming up Alba, the

673
00:31:11,047 --> 00:31:14,247
Speaker 2: Prime Minister, it's going to do it. Adam Goodsamanda Kella

674
00:31:14,327 --> 00:31:18,487
Speaker 2: Hamish Blake is next Oh So really good Feel Good TV.

675
00:31:18,567 --> 00:31:20,887
Speaker 2: It's on the ABC and iView. It's called The Assembly.

676
00:31:21,327 --> 00:31:24,607
Speaker 4: My recommendation, there's not a lot of fashion sash style

677
00:31:24,767 --> 00:31:27,367
Speaker 4: things that I would have the guts to recommend. But

678
00:31:27,767 --> 00:31:29,607
Speaker 4: if you were going to ask my recommendation about one

679
00:31:29,607 --> 00:31:30,847
Speaker 4: item of clothing, what would it be?

680
00:31:32,367 --> 00:31:34,327
Speaker 1: Wing die lina, work out gear?

681
00:31:34,487 --> 00:31:35,527
Speaker 4: Work out gear leg.

682
00:31:35,647 --> 00:31:39,207
Speaker 1: Sorry, I've got panicked live in active wear.

683
00:31:39,367 --> 00:31:41,687
Speaker 4: That's my uniform, right, I have never asked you that

684
00:31:41,727 --> 00:31:45,727
Speaker 4: because you have camel tie, all right, that's a personal issue.

685
00:31:45,767 --> 00:31:46,887
Speaker 4: That isn't relevant.

686
00:31:46,927 --> 00:31:49,247
Speaker 2: Having a vagina, that's a personal.

687
00:31:51,487 --> 00:31:51,807
Speaker 10: Sorry.

688
00:31:53,327 --> 00:31:58,007
Speaker 4: Anyway. I have tried every pair of leggings, the expensive ones,

689
00:31:58,367 --> 00:32:03,367
Speaker 4: the cheap ones, that everything. And I recently went into Uniclo.

690
00:32:03,487 --> 00:32:06,727
Speaker 4: I had someone recommend me these specific leggings and they

691
00:32:06,847 --> 00:32:11,607
Speaker 4: are called Airism Ultra Stretch leggings. They're fifty bucks and

692
00:32:11,647 --> 00:32:16,047
Speaker 4: I got them in lilac. They are your first mistake. Yeah,

693
00:32:16,127 --> 00:32:17,567
Speaker 4: I don't know about my color.

694
00:32:17,607 --> 00:32:18,887
Speaker 1: Why did you get them in la?

695
00:32:21,847 --> 00:32:23,807
Speaker 4: I think they look I think they.

696
00:32:23,727 --> 00:32:25,207
Speaker 3: Look would lielac.

697
00:32:25,247 --> 00:32:28,167
Speaker 1: Why are you telling the first of all sweat, second

698
00:32:28,167 --> 00:32:32,607
Speaker 1: of all period, third of all pelvic floor leakage. And

699
00:32:32,727 --> 00:32:35,287
Speaker 1: fourth of all, can you can see more you Camelton?

700
00:32:35,447 --> 00:32:38,327
Speaker 4: No, I don't have any. Actually, I bought myself some

701
00:32:38,367 --> 00:32:42,047
Speaker 4: seamless underpants from Bonds, which were also good that I

702
00:32:42,047 --> 00:32:43,807
Speaker 4: think are quite good for the camel ca This.

703
00:32:43,887 --> 00:32:45,527
Speaker 3: Is a Camelt recommendation.

704
00:32:46,687 --> 00:32:48,647
Speaker 2: Anyway, let's move past that, Lilac, go on.

705
00:32:48,807 --> 00:32:51,087
Speaker 4: Yes, I was just thinking they should have like padding.

706
00:32:51,727 --> 00:32:53,607
Speaker 4: You know how there's like a when you do cricket,

707
00:32:53,887 --> 00:32:56,287
Speaker 4: there's like a cup box. Yeah, you should have a

708
00:32:56,327 --> 00:32:59,447
Speaker 4: cup for Camelton. Anyway, let me start the thing about

709
00:32:59,447 --> 00:33:02,607
Speaker 4: a good pair of tights. I want them high. I

710
00:33:02,607 --> 00:33:04,607
Speaker 4: can't have them around my Hip's my widest point. That's

711
00:33:04,687 --> 00:33:06,687
Speaker 4: just I'm just going to feel uncomfortable all day and

712
00:33:06,687 --> 00:33:08,967
Speaker 4: I have to be super stretchy and really really soft.

713
00:33:09,047 --> 00:33:11,287
Speaker 4: These You know how people say buttery soft? I never

714
00:33:11,367 --> 00:33:14,047
Speaker 4: knew what that meant. These are the most comfortable time

715
00:33:14,567 --> 00:33:18,007
Speaker 4: I've ever put on day out or do you ever

716
00:33:18,247 --> 00:33:20,487
Speaker 4: wear tights? Right and you're walking around on you're exercising

717
00:33:20,487 --> 00:33:22,327
Speaker 4: and then the bottom starts to sack. Do you know

718
00:33:22,367 --> 00:33:24,167
Speaker 4: what I mean by that? Like the thing they start

719
00:33:24,247 --> 00:33:25,767
Speaker 4: to make their way down, you got to pull them

720
00:33:25,807 --> 00:33:28,047
Speaker 4: up oh all day, I don't have time for that,

721
00:33:28,167 --> 00:33:32,087
Speaker 4: and also has two pockets. Great pocket has two pockets.

722
00:33:32,287 --> 00:33:35,527
Speaker 4: It's really really good anyway, best ones I've ever had,

723
00:33:35,687 --> 00:33:40,847
Speaker 4: super elastic key. They are from unicloat fifty bucks I have. Yeah,

724
00:33:40,887 --> 00:33:42,727
Speaker 4: I could wear them to better. I reckon they're that comfortable.

725
00:33:45,607 --> 00:33:48,407
Speaker 1: Every Tuesday and Thursday we drop new segments if Mum

726
00:33:48,407 --> 00:33:50,207
Speaker 1: and Me are out Loud just for Mum and Me

727
00:33:50,287 --> 00:33:52,807
Speaker 1: as subscribers, follow the link in the show notes to

728
00:33:52,807 --> 00:33:55,127
Speaker 1: get your daily dose of out Loud and a big

729
00:33:55,207 --> 00:34:09,247
Speaker 1: thank you to everyone who is already subscribed. It's time

730
00:34:09,247 --> 00:34:11,007
Speaker 1: I have the bestst of the week where we talk

731
00:34:11,047 --> 00:34:13,767
Speaker 1: about our high moments and low moments. Mine hasn't happened

732
00:34:13,847 --> 00:34:15,847
Speaker 1: yet because I haven't seen Jesse in her laggings with

733
00:34:15,927 --> 00:34:16,807
Speaker 1: her camel Toroe.

734
00:34:17,327 --> 00:34:17,927
Speaker 4: I'll take a phight.

735
00:34:18,167 --> 00:34:20,847
Speaker 1: But my other worst of the week that actually has

736
00:34:20,927 --> 00:34:25,407
Speaker 1: happened is that I have had the one hundred day cold.

737
00:34:26,047 --> 00:34:28,007
Speaker 1: You can hear it in my voice. I'm probably going

738
00:34:28,047 --> 00:34:30,447
Speaker 1: into I don't know, it feels like day a million.

739
00:34:30,647 --> 00:34:32,647
Speaker 1: The person who told me about this was Kate Langbrook,

740
00:34:32,767 --> 00:34:35,007
Speaker 1: who I saw at the Logis.

741
00:34:35,687 --> 00:34:37,647
Speaker 4: Where I was. Is this a real thing or is

742
00:34:37,687 --> 00:34:38,687
Speaker 4: this so Kate theory?

743
00:34:38,847 --> 00:34:40,727
Speaker 2: And also, you know, why have you been Is it

744
00:34:40,807 --> 00:34:42,407
Speaker 2: your fault that you've been sick for so long?

745
00:34:42,407 --> 00:34:45,007
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know why. My immune systems

746
00:34:45,167 --> 00:34:47,687
Speaker 1: just it's like I've just had one thing after another.

747
00:34:47,727 --> 00:34:50,847
Speaker 1: I had got influenza A, then I got a chest infection,

748
00:34:51,127 --> 00:34:54,087
Speaker 1: and then last week I had just an average sort

749
00:34:54,087 --> 00:34:56,847
Speaker 1: of a cold. Because I've got asthma, it often goes

750
00:34:56,887 --> 00:34:59,767
Speaker 1: to my chest. I just think I haven't had a

751
00:34:59,847 --> 00:35:02,967
Speaker 1: chance to properly recover probably, and I've just kept going

752
00:35:03,007 --> 00:35:06,047
Speaker 1: and kept going. And Kate said she's the same. I

753
00:35:06,087 --> 00:35:07,847
Speaker 1: spoke to someone else. He said, they've got one hundred

754
00:35:07,927 --> 00:35:10,247
Speaker 1: day cough. It's just I been a really rough winter

755
00:35:10,607 --> 00:35:14,127
Speaker 1: for people. Lots of people that momame are away. It's

756
00:35:14,167 --> 00:35:16,927
Speaker 1: not great. I mean, there's people going through much worse things,

757
00:35:16,927 --> 00:35:19,287
Speaker 1: but there's no judgment around best and worst. And I've

758
00:35:19,327 --> 00:35:22,567
Speaker 1: just felt like, oh, I've just felt so annoyed.

759
00:35:22,207 --> 00:35:23,727
Speaker 2: All so when it goes on for a really long

760
00:35:23,727 --> 00:35:25,847
Speaker 2: time something like that, like at the beginning, you're like, Okay,

761
00:35:25,847 --> 00:35:27,127
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go to bed and have some soup and

762
00:35:27,127 --> 00:35:27,727
Speaker 2: I'm going to take it.

763
00:35:27,767 --> 00:35:28,207
Speaker 3: Out of work.

764
00:35:29,007 --> 00:35:31,727
Speaker 2: But then you just have to, like you just have to,

765
00:35:31,847 --> 00:35:34,567
Speaker 2: don't You're just walking around with it and it sucks.

766
00:35:35,287 --> 00:35:38,967
Speaker 1: My best was I went to the set of Strife

767
00:35:39,047 --> 00:35:41,647
Speaker 1: the second season started shooting a couple of weeks ago.

768
00:35:41,687 --> 00:35:44,407
Speaker 1: I haven't been to set yet because of aforementioned one

769
00:35:44,447 --> 00:35:47,207
Speaker 1: hundred day cold. And one thing that you know is

770
00:35:47,247 --> 00:35:49,047
Speaker 1: that you really don't want to spread Jones on set.

771
00:35:49,327 --> 00:35:51,807
Speaker 1: So last year, when we had the first time all

772
00:35:51,847 --> 00:35:54,527
Speaker 1: the cast got together and did their read through, I

773
00:35:54,647 --> 00:35:56,687
Speaker 1: wasn't feeling very well that day, and it was the

774
00:35:56,687 --> 00:35:58,367
Speaker 1: first time I met a lot of cast. I was

775
00:35:58,447 --> 00:36:02,207
Speaker 1: like lots of hugs and everything. I felt increasingly bad

776
00:36:02,247 --> 00:36:04,447
Speaker 1: as the read through happened and I got home, and

777
00:36:04,447 --> 00:36:06,167
Speaker 1: that night I tested positive for COVID.

778
00:36:06,247 --> 00:36:07,367
Speaker 4: But you were wearing a mask.

779
00:36:07,607 --> 00:36:10,567
Speaker 1: I was all right wearing a mask. Yes, So I

780
00:36:10,567 --> 00:36:12,727
Speaker 1: didn't give it to anyone that I know of. But

781
00:36:12,767 --> 00:36:14,727
Speaker 1: back when we were shooting season one, it was still

782
00:36:14,727 --> 00:36:17,287
Speaker 1: COVID protocols, so you had to test every day before

783
00:36:17,287 --> 00:36:19,487
Speaker 1: you came to set. You had to wear masks unless

784
00:36:19,527 --> 00:36:21,607
Speaker 1: you were a performer or unless you were eating lunch.

785
00:36:22,127 --> 00:36:24,407
Speaker 1: It reminded me what a different vibe it is to

786
00:36:24,487 --> 00:36:27,407
Speaker 1: not have to, and it just felt so joyous being

787
00:36:27,447 --> 00:36:29,527
Speaker 1: on set. I saw all of the a lot of

788
00:36:29,567 --> 00:36:33,247
Speaker 1: the cast at the logis, but it was just lovely

789
00:36:33,287 --> 00:36:35,087
Speaker 1: like being on set. And again, I've got nothing to

790
00:36:35,087 --> 00:36:37,967
Speaker 1: do on set as an executive producer, but we're filming

791
00:36:37,967 --> 00:36:39,847
Speaker 1: the office scenes this week and there's a few new

792
00:36:39,887 --> 00:36:41,487
Speaker 1: cast members. It's glorious as.

793
00:36:41,487 --> 00:36:43,367
Speaker 2: Loud as I want to know if all their favorites

794
00:36:43,367 --> 00:36:43,767
Speaker 2: are back.

795
00:36:44,127 --> 00:36:47,167
Speaker 1: Yes, all their favorites are back, plus some extras. I

796
00:36:47,287 --> 00:36:49,327
Speaker 1: met an actress who I've been a fan of for

797
00:36:49,367 --> 00:36:52,527
Speaker 1: a really long time yesterday on set who I can't mention,

798
00:36:53,007 --> 00:36:57,167
Speaker 1: and she was wearing this outfit in character, and I

799
00:36:57,287 --> 00:37:00,727
Speaker 1: was wearing an almost identical outfit just in my regular

800
00:37:00,807 --> 00:37:02,247
Speaker 1: life without realizing it.

801
00:37:02,287 --> 00:37:03,567
Speaker 3: That's very me or I love it.

802
00:37:04,047 --> 00:37:08,127
Speaker 4: My worst is that Lucra is away for the week.

803
00:37:08,407 --> 00:37:11,887
Speaker 4: He's overseas and I am doing the solo momth thing

804
00:37:12,047 --> 00:37:15,367
Speaker 4: and oh my god, she still wakes up overnight, which

805
00:37:15,487 --> 00:37:19,407
Speaker 4: is fine if you're kind of handing over to each

806
00:37:19,447 --> 00:37:19,767
Speaker 4: other and.

807
00:37:19,887 --> 00:37:21,487
Speaker 1: You two have always tag teamed really well.

808
00:37:21,567 --> 00:37:23,927
Speaker 4: Yeah, so normally we tag team, but now when you've

809
00:37:23,927 --> 00:37:26,327
Speaker 4: got a baby waking up overnight, and then sometimes she's

810
00:37:26,407 --> 00:37:29,767
Speaker 4: up really early. You just have a bunch of I

811
00:37:29,767 --> 00:37:31,807
Speaker 4: can always find that, like I can do a night

812
00:37:31,887 --> 00:37:33,767
Speaker 4: or two of bad sleep. But you know when you

813
00:37:33,847 --> 00:37:36,327
Speaker 4: have had a lot of nights and you can't catch up,

814
00:37:36,327 --> 00:37:38,287
Speaker 4: that's when you start to feel very run down.

815
00:37:38,887 --> 00:37:41,247
Speaker 1: But I've had almost eighteen months worth of nights.

816
00:37:41,767 --> 00:37:44,127
Speaker 4: Yeah, look, and normally I can just I can catch

817
00:37:44,207 --> 00:37:46,727
Speaker 4: up because Luca's around. But on the first night, Luca

818
00:37:46,807 --> 00:37:48,207
Speaker 4: left and I just went, we're can I go to

819
00:37:48,247 --> 00:37:50,567
Speaker 4: Clare's And we went to my sister's place and we

820
00:37:50,647 --> 00:37:53,007
Speaker 4: had dinner and the girls had baths together and it

821
00:37:53,047 --> 00:37:54,927
Speaker 4: was great. And I came home and went, Honestly, I

822
00:37:54,967 --> 00:37:58,327
Speaker 4: am nailing me. I don't even need Luca, You're not.

823
00:37:58,407 --> 00:38:02,087
Speaker 4: This is easy without him, Like it's just really applauding myself.

824
00:38:02,527 --> 00:38:05,127
Speaker 4: And then I put her to bed and I was like, boom, bom, boom,

825
00:38:05,167 --> 00:38:07,847
Speaker 4: just nailing it. And then after about an hour she

826
00:38:07,927 --> 00:38:10,247
Speaker 4: started crying, which was weird, and I went upstairs and

827
00:38:10,287 --> 00:38:12,767
Speaker 4: whatever I had fed her at Claire's had to all

828
00:38:12,767 --> 00:38:15,127
Speaker 4: come out, and she had done the world's biggest vomit

829
00:38:15,167 --> 00:38:18,247
Speaker 4: in a cot on the floor everywhere, And so then

830
00:38:18,287 --> 00:38:19,687
Speaker 4: we're in the shower and then we're in the bath,

831
00:38:19,847 --> 00:38:22,567
Speaker 4: washed your hair three times, still smell it, vomit, take

832
00:38:22,607 --> 00:38:24,767
Speaker 4: the sheet off, the cot, throat in the hallway, all

833
00:38:24,767 --> 00:38:26,687
Speaker 4: the things, and you've only got two hands. And then

834
00:38:26,687 --> 00:38:28,767
Speaker 4: she's like, Mum, I'm hungry. I just vomited everything. I'm like,

835
00:38:28,767 --> 00:38:30,287
Speaker 4: when am I going to get your botle anyway?

836
00:38:30,807 --> 00:38:31,927
Speaker 1: And you're going to remake the bed.

837
00:38:32,047 --> 00:38:33,887
Speaker 4: You got to remake the bed, put the cot down,

838
00:38:34,047 --> 00:38:37,327
Speaker 4: and I'm like, mate, I'm tired. Actually anyway, I put

839
00:38:37,327 --> 00:38:39,727
Speaker 4: her back down and then I go, hang on, where

840
00:38:39,727 --> 00:38:41,927
Speaker 4: did the cot sheet go? Because I put it in

841
00:38:41,967 --> 00:38:44,327
Speaker 4: the hallway and now it's not there. And I hear

842
00:38:44,527 --> 00:38:47,767
Speaker 4: from my bedroom the dog who had stolen the cot

843
00:38:47,807 --> 00:38:51,807
Speaker 4: sheet in the vomit, and I was just so disgusting,

844
00:38:52,207 --> 00:38:53,767
Speaker 4: and I was like, you had to clean it up

845
00:38:53,807 --> 00:38:56,927
Speaker 4: because and it was horrible.

846
00:38:56,967 --> 00:38:58,487
Speaker 1: My dog's eaten worse. Yeah.

847
00:39:02,367 --> 00:39:05,847
Speaker 4: My best though is that over the weekend MI children

848
00:39:05,887 --> 00:39:08,367
Speaker 4: Luna did have their first sleepover, so slumber party. Claire

849
00:39:08,407 --> 00:39:10,647
Speaker 4: came over. I had a few friends over that night

850
00:39:10,727 --> 00:39:13,527
Speaker 4: and then Matilda was having a rough time and I went,

851
00:39:13,567 --> 00:39:15,327
Speaker 4: why don't you just stay? And so we had to

852
00:39:15,327 --> 00:39:20,247
Speaker 4: sleep over. The girls were in their pajamas. They stayed,

853
00:39:20,327 --> 00:39:23,767
Speaker 4: which was lovely, and then we all had breakfast, so

854
00:39:23,807 --> 00:39:25,927
Speaker 4: Claire slept with me, and then we've got travel coot,

855
00:39:26,047 --> 00:39:29,367
Speaker 4: so Matilda was just in that and then Luna was

856
00:39:29,407 --> 00:39:31,207
Speaker 4: in her bed. She didn't know Matilda was staying, so

857
00:39:31,727 --> 00:39:33,127
Speaker 4: when she woke up in the morning though, I saw

858
00:39:33,127 --> 00:39:35,367
Speaker 4: Claire was there, she was like, oh my god, this

859
00:39:35,527 --> 00:39:37,727
Speaker 4: is great. And then the girls had breakfast together.

860
00:39:37,807 --> 00:39:39,767
Speaker 1: It was just does she like Matilda anymore?

861
00:39:39,887 --> 00:39:40,247
Speaker 3: She is?

862
00:39:40,287 --> 00:39:41,007
Speaker 1: She growing on.

863
00:39:40,927 --> 00:39:44,927
Speaker 4: Her getting there. She doesn't like actively cry now when

864
00:39:44,927 --> 00:39:47,367
Speaker 4: she sees Matilda, which is good. It's like exposure therapy.

865
00:39:47,687 --> 00:39:51,687
Speaker 4: But Matilda loves Luna, and Luna's just feeling like matilda

866
00:39:51,687 --> 00:39:53,607
Speaker 4: steels are attention a bit. It's always fun when there's

867
00:39:53,647 --> 00:39:55,527
Speaker 4: other people around, So yeah.

868
00:39:55,527 --> 00:39:58,527
Speaker 1: Parenting when there's other people around the village, etc.

869
00:39:59,327 --> 00:40:00,207
Speaker 4: Holly, what's your worst.

870
00:40:00,207 --> 00:40:01,407
Speaker 2: I'm going to get in a lot of trouble for

871
00:40:01,447 --> 00:40:03,807
Speaker 2: my worst because I'm just going to be honest about

872
00:40:03,807 --> 00:40:07,367
Speaker 2: a conversation I had with some friends this week when

873
00:40:07,407 --> 00:40:09,607
Speaker 2: I found out that everybody I knows on diet drugs

874
00:40:09,607 --> 00:40:10,127
Speaker 2: except for me.

875
00:40:10,647 --> 00:40:12,167
Speaker 1: It's like injectibles.

876
00:40:12,407 --> 00:40:15,247
Speaker 2: Yeah, I thought the only famous people were doing that shit,

877
00:40:15,967 --> 00:40:18,887
Speaker 2: and there's me being an ordinary person thinking, oh, I know,

878
00:40:19,047 --> 00:40:21,847
Speaker 2: talking about weight and bodies is very fraught. We generally

879
00:40:21,927 --> 00:40:24,047
Speaker 2: don't talk about it much. But I've also said a

880
00:40:24,087 --> 00:40:25,607
Speaker 2: couple of times I had a fight with Jesse about

881
00:40:25,647 --> 00:40:27,807
Speaker 2: this on the show. There are a lot of women

882
00:40:27,847 --> 00:40:31,007
Speaker 2: out there, particularly midlife women, who are not feeling great

883
00:40:31,007 --> 00:40:35,287
Speaker 2: about their bodies, who are trying to eat right, exercise hard,

884
00:40:35,287 --> 00:40:37,687
Speaker 2: blah blah blah. And I'm in that phase at the

885
00:40:37,687 --> 00:40:40,407
Speaker 2: moment of just being like, I'm an ordinary person who

886
00:40:40,487 --> 00:40:41,807
Speaker 2: my weight goes up and down and all that, and

887
00:40:41,847 --> 00:40:44,487
Speaker 2: at the moment I'm being really trying to pull back

888
00:40:44,527 --> 00:40:47,807
Speaker 2: to some kind of like very healthy whatever fucking eating

889
00:40:47,807 --> 00:40:49,127
Speaker 2: cottage cheese all the time?

890
00:40:49,767 --> 00:40:51,887
Speaker 4: Cottage? Can I just ask about cottage cheese because you

891
00:40:51,967 --> 00:40:53,727
Speaker 4: meant to feed toddlers that is that like the best

892
00:40:53,847 --> 00:40:54,767
Speaker 4: version of cheese or something.

893
00:40:54,847 --> 00:40:57,967
Speaker 2: It's very protein rich and low fat, right, so if

894
00:40:58,007 --> 00:40:59,687
Speaker 2: you eat and again, I don't want to sound like

895
00:40:59,767 --> 00:41:01,727
Speaker 2: I don't know one of those magazines from the eighth.

896
00:41:01,647 --> 00:41:03,007
Speaker 4: Now I have questions about cottage.

897
00:41:03,007 --> 00:41:05,807
Speaker 2: Shy protein breakfast Sarah are a good thing to so

898
00:41:05,807 --> 00:41:07,967
Speaker 2: cottag cheese anyway, I'm not criticisz anywhere, I don't want

899
00:41:08,007 --> 00:41:10,447
Speaker 2: to sound like one of those people, but any here,

900
00:41:10,527 --> 00:41:13,647
Speaker 2: I am being one of those people. And then I

901
00:41:13,767 --> 00:41:15,727
Speaker 2: talk to some of my friends and they're like, Oh,

902
00:41:15,807 --> 00:41:20,327
Speaker 2: everybody's taking them. Everybody's doing that now, And it made

903
00:41:20,407 --> 00:41:20,807
Speaker 2: me sad.

904
00:41:20,927 --> 00:41:22,367
Speaker 1: I told you a bunch of people that we know

905
00:41:22,647 --> 00:41:25,647
Speaker 1: are And the thing about menopause, though, is that your

906
00:41:25,647 --> 00:41:28,167
Speaker 1: body just wants to turn into a circle. Like it's

907
00:41:28,207 --> 00:41:30,847
Speaker 1: just desperate to turn into a circle. It doesn't matter

908
00:41:30,927 --> 00:41:34,367
Speaker 1: what you do or what you don't do. Your body's like, nah,

909
00:41:34,367 --> 00:41:35,567
Speaker 1: we're going to be a circle.

910
00:41:35,927 --> 00:41:38,247
Speaker 2: And I know it doesn't matter, right, I know it doesn't,

911
00:41:38,967 --> 00:41:41,927
Speaker 2: But also you're kind of when you don't feel like yourself,

912
00:41:41,967 --> 00:41:44,127
Speaker 2: when you feel all those like you know, you're just

913
00:41:44,207 --> 00:41:45,807
Speaker 2: trying to feel better. And then I'm like, oh, I

914
00:41:45,847 --> 00:41:47,967
Speaker 2: see what everybody else is doing. Food is a big

915
00:41:48,007 --> 00:41:49,927
Speaker 2: I like food a lot, right, I like healthy food.

916
00:41:49,927 --> 00:41:53,287
Speaker 2: I like but rituals around food, thinking about it, cooking

917
00:41:53,327 --> 00:41:55,527
Speaker 2: and eating with my family, going out for dinner, all

918
00:41:55,567 --> 00:41:57,807
Speaker 2: those things are things that bring me a lot of joy.

919
00:41:58,927 --> 00:42:02,407
Speaker 2: And as I understand it, a lot of those medications,

920
00:42:02,407 --> 00:42:04,607
Speaker 2: like they just remove food from your world. I remember

921
00:42:04,607 --> 00:42:07,727
Speaker 2: when you when you InterVideo Han Hari about it, and

922
00:42:07,807 --> 00:42:09,087
Speaker 2: one of the things that really sticks in my mind,

923
00:42:09,127 --> 00:42:10,767
Speaker 2: and he was talking about how he had very unhealthy

924
00:42:10,807 --> 00:42:13,807
Speaker 2: relationship with food and he would, you know, eat buckets

925
00:42:13,807 --> 00:42:16,167
Speaker 2: and buckets of fried chicken and things to make him

926
00:42:16,167 --> 00:42:18,847
Speaker 2: feel better. And so for him it was this amazing freedom,

927
00:42:19,207 --> 00:42:21,687
Speaker 2: but then it also left this gap and I think

928
00:42:21,727 --> 00:42:24,087
Speaker 2: about a lot, but do I actually want to remove

929
00:42:24,327 --> 00:42:26,807
Speaker 2: the joy that comes with that from my life? Like

930
00:42:26,847 --> 00:42:29,447
Speaker 2: I don't think I do anyway, Sorry, everybody, how I

931
00:42:29,447 --> 00:42:30,047
Speaker 2: offended with that?

932
00:42:30,127 --> 00:42:30,407
Speaker 3: Worst?

933
00:42:30,687 --> 00:42:32,087
Speaker 1: How'd you have offended? Anyway?

934
00:42:32,167 --> 00:42:35,767
Speaker 2: Because it's very sensitive talking about bodies and diets and things.

935
00:42:35,767 --> 00:42:37,247
Speaker 4: But I think it's also a thing that a lot

936
00:42:37,247 --> 00:42:39,367
Speaker 4: of people are grappling with and that choice and going

937
00:42:39,407 --> 00:42:40,927
Speaker 4: on it, and I know people who have gone on

938
00:42:40,927 --> 00:42:42,927
Speaker 4: it and it's made them feel really sick. And yeah,

939
00:42:42,927 --> 00:42:44,607
Speaker 4: I think it's something a lot of people are talking about.

940
00:42:44,767 --> 00:42:48,607
Speaker 2: Yeah, anyway, my best is related to jess is worst,

941
00:42:48,767 --> 00:42:50,607
Speaker 2: and it's that Brent's been away and.

942
00:42:52,207 --> 00:42:53,327
Speaker 4: Have many children run away?

943
00:42:53,367 --> 00:42:57,167
Speaker 2: Would be really upset to hear this, but hopefully no

944
00:42:57,247 --> 00:42:59,847
Speaker 2: children are vomited, and my children obviously are bigger they

945
00:42:59,847 --> 00:43:01,287
Speaker 2: can take care of themselves a lot more. It is

946
00:43:01,367 --> 00:43:03,767
Speaker 2: still a lot more work for me when he's not around.

947
00:43:03,807 --> 00:43:05,607
Speaker 2: Like there's a lot of driving people around, there's a

948
00:43:05,607 --> 00:43:07,047
Speaker 2: lot of cooking, there's a lot of all that stuff.

949
00:43:07,847 --> 00:43:11,287
Speaker 2: But sometimes on the weekend, I really like to just

950
00:43:11,327 --> 00:43:13,807
Speaker 2: be quiet and be at home and just be pottering

951
00:43:13,847 --> 00:43:15,447
Speaker 2: about and just do the things I want to do.

952
00:43:15,487 --> 00:43:17,167
Speaker 2: And that's what I did this weekend. Me and Billy

953
00:43:17,207 --> 00:43:19,527
Speaker 2: had a really good Mum and Billy day on Saturday

954
00:43:19,567 --> 00:43:21,007
Speaker 2: where we went to eat dumplings.

955
00:43:20,607 --> 00:43:21,727
Speaker 3: Which is our favorite thing.

956
00:43:22,407 --> 00:43:24,327
Speaker 2: And it made him build some veggie beds with me,

957
00:43:24,447 --> 00:43:27,207
Speaker 2: which he hated, but I bribed him with things for it,

958
00:43:27,287 --> 00:43:29,367
Speaker 2: and I called back together time even though.

959
00:43:29,207 --> 00:43:30,967
Speaker 3: He was winting all the way through it.

960
00:43:31,647 --> 00:43:33,927
Speaker 2: And I built a new cage for my veggie bed

961
00:43:33,967 --> 00:43:36,007
Speaker 2: that the rats keeping ready. And I was like, every

962
00:43:36,047 --> 00:43:38,247
Speaker 2: time I went in the kitchen and I put something down,

963
00:43:38,287 --> 00:43:39,887
Speaker 2: it was there when I went back in for it.

964
00:43:39,767 --> 00:43:40,407
Speaker 3: It was great.

965
00:43:40,527 --> 00:43:42,127
Speaker 4: So I was, yeah, I know what you mean.

966
00:43:42,287 --> 00:43:45,407
Speaker 2: Brent came back and I was like, yeah, I love you, but.

967
00:43:45,367 --> 00:43:46,007
Speaker 3: It's been nice.

968
00:43:46,127 --> 00:43:47,287
Speaker 4: Oh he's Brent back already.

969
00:43:47,407 --> 00:43:48,847
Speaker 2: He got back this week Wednesday.

970
00:43:48,887 --> 00:43:50,007
Speaker 4: Can you send him to my house?

971
00:43:50,287 --> 00:43:50,487
Speaker 1: Yes?

972
00:43:50,967 --> 00:43:53,367
Speaker 2: Actually he'd be really useful. He loves a baby. I

973
00:43:53,447 --> 00:43:55,567
Speaker 2: think he would anyway, So yes, those are my best

974
00:43:55,567 --> 00:43:55,887
Speaker 2: and worst.

975
00:43:55,887 --> 00:43:59,727
Speaker 4: The week before we go, we had a very interesting

976
00:43:59,767 --> 00:44:03,087
Speaker 4: discussion on yesterday's subscriber episode about whether it is ever

977
00:44:03,127 --> 00:44:07,207
Speaker 4: appropriate to buy a sex toy for a friend as

978
00:44:07,247 --> 00:44:10,687
Speaker 4: a gift and spoiler, one of us wrote this dilemma

979
00:44:11,127 --> 00:44:14,247
Speaker 4: and one of us was horrified. So if you want

980
00:44:14,247 --> 00:44:16,447
Speaker 4: to listen to that episode, there is a link to

981
00:44:16,567 --> 00:44:17,727
Speaker 4: it in our show notes.

982
00:44:17,927 --> 00:44:19,967
Speaker 2: I can't wait to hear what the outlouders think about

983
00:44:19,967 --> 00:44:21,607
Speaker 2: whether or not you should do that. This is one

984
00:44:21,607 --> 00:44:22,927
Speaker 2: we definitely need you all to weigh in.

985
00:44:22,967 --> 00:44:23,567
Speaker 3: I'm friends.

986
00:44:24,767 --> 00:44:26,887
Speaker 2: That's all we've got time for today and this week.

987
00:44:26,927 --> 00:44:29,127
Speaker 2: A massive thank you to all of you out louders

988
00:44:29,127 --> 00:44:30,967
Speaker 2: for listening to us. We'll be back in your ears

989
00:44:31,007 --> 00:44:33,847
Speaker 2: next week. Also, it's Friday and we need to thank

990
00:44:33,887 --> 00:44:37,607
Speaker 2: our amazing team, our excellent producer, Emmeline Gazillis of course,

991
00:44:37,647 --> 00:44:40,727
Speaker 2: and Leah Porges for her audio production. And we'll see

992
00:44:40,727 --> 00:44:41,487
Speaker 2: you all on Monday.

993
00:44:41,727 --> 00:44:47,207
Speaker 1: Bye bye. Shout out to any Muma Mia subscribers listening

994
00:44:47,367 --> 00:44:49,647
Speaker 1: if you love the show and want to support us

995
00:44:49,687 --> 00:44:52,207
Speaker 1: as well. Subscribing to mom and Mia is the very

996
00:44:52,247 --> 00:44:54,207
Speaker 1: best way to do so. There is a link in

997
00:44:54,247 --> 00:44:55,327
Speaker 1: the episode description