Speaker 1: Hey, it's Caath.
Speaker 2: If you've been a listener of the four five six Club, Hi,
Speaker 2: I've missed you. I've been thinking a lot about this
Speaker 2: stage of life, because God, sometimes it feels like a
Speaker 2: shit show, like everyone needs something from you all the time,
Speaker 2: and you're over it. So where you've started something new
Speaker 2: that is a total brain break, A show where you
Speaker 2: don't need to think or remember anything or do anything
Speaker 2: except hang out and laugh. It's called Unleashed, and it's
Speaker 2: the one place where you can just switch your brain off,
Speaker 2: laugh and hear women saying the things you're probably thinking.
Speaker 2: It's me with a group of brilliant, funny, very honest women,
Speaker 2: Mary Coustas, Sally Hepworth, Bruna pap Andrea, Ginny Mansburg and
Speaker 2: Grace Lamb talking about everything we don't always say out loud.
Speaker 2: This episode is a little taste of that. Hello, and
Speaker 2: welcome to Unleashed, the podcast for gen X women who
Speaker 2: need a laugh, maybe a.
Speaker 1: Cry, and a little break from the shit show of life.
Speaker 1: So who is in your ears today?
Speaker 3: I'm Mary Kustas, I'm an actress.
Speaker 4: I'm Sally Hitworth, I'm an author, I'm Bruna pep Andrea
Speaker 4: and I'm a film and television producer and.
Speaker 1: I'm Kath Mahoney and I'm a comedian.
Speaker 2: Okay, wherever you're listening, unclenching, your clench your palvic floor
Speaker 2: and get ready to unleash. Okay, I have in my
Speaker 2: hand the talking stick. If you have the stick, you
Speaker 2: have the floor.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I want to know.
Speaker 2: Has there ever been a time you've been mistaken for
Speaker 2: somebody else?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 5: Oh, sal stick for you very fancy.
Speaker 4: In fact, I have video footage of the time that
Speaker 4: I was mistaken. It was because I was over in
Speaker 4: America for Good Morning America and I was waiting to
Speaker 4: the side of the stage and I was watching and
Speaker 4: Sherry Shepherd from The View was being interviewed and I
Speaker 4: love the View, and I was watching and at the
Speaker 4: end of her segment, I was standing to the side
Speaker 4: and my publicist was filming me ready to go on stage.
Speaker 4: And as Sherry came off, I sort of stood back
Speaker 4: out of the way and she looked at me and
Speaker 4: she did a double take, and then she said.
Speaker 3: Hello, how are you. It's so good to see you.
Speaker 4: When she gave me a kiss, and she was so effusive,
Speaker 4: and I was like, oh gosh, and we had a
Speaker 4: kiss in a hug, and then she and obviously, well
Speaker 4: I didn't know what had happened, right, So then she
Speaker 4: turned and walked off, and my publicist was there, and
Speaker 4: so I then went on, didn't know what had happened,
Speaker 4: was really excited. I was such good friends with Sherry Shepherd.
Speaker 4: And then when I came off of Katie, my publicist said.
Speaker 5: She thought you were Naomi. What's so glorious about it
Speaker 5: is that.
Speaker 4: She's got this video of me standing there looking starstruck,
Speaker 4: Sherry coming off, doing the double take, the effusive greeting,
Speaker 4: and then as Sherry walks off, you can actually see
Speaker 4: the cogs turning and she's got this expression on her
Speaker 4: face that's like, who the fuck was that? He's a
Speaker 4: friend of ours, particularly with this new hair. She's rocking
Speaker 4: the same hair right now.
Speaker 6: You do really like each other? Actually?
Speaker 4: Well that, I mean, that's the biggest class beautiful on
Speaker 4: you do, doesn't she?
Speaker 3: She does?
Speaker 4: But also I think in America and being Australian and
Speaker 4: all of that kind of stuff, it can You're at
Speaker 4: a big talk show, yeah, so you could easily be
Speaker 4: a big movie star waiting in the Eyeland.
Speaker 7: I get mistaken because, as some of the listeners would not,
Speaker 7: I play a famous character, which I've done for almost
Speaker 7: four decades, Fie. I get mistaken as Mary for e
Speaker 7: Fie Zahos, the woman that does the financial stuff.
Speaker 3: On the Today Show and Channel nine.
Speaker 7: Like all the time. People think I'm her. They thank
Speaker 7: me for financial advice. But I just want to tell
Speaker 7: this little story.
Speaker 5: You're very welcome.
Speaker 3: Yes, I just agree with people. People don't like it
Speaker 3: when you disagree.
Speaker 7: I was rehearsing in a in like an RSL type
Speaker 7: of club because it's close to where I live and
Speaker 7: I needed a theater space. And I was standing at
Speaker 7: the lift and there was this sort of like meek
Speaker 7: little guy, sort of skinny, and I could tell he
Speaker 7: was Greek from the visual right. And we go up
Speaker 7: in the lift and he turns to me and he says,
Speaker 7: do you know you look like And I said her?
Speaker 7: And he said, you look like that Efie Zahos from
Speaker 7: the Today Show. And I said to him, you know what,
Speaker 7: I do look like her? Absolutely, I look like her.
Speaker 7: And he said to me, and you know who she
Speaker 7: looks like?
Speaker 3: I said, does she look like she looks like the Effie?
Speaker 3: That's really funny.
Speaker 7: Oh my god, she absolutely does and the lift doors
Speaker 7: open and I walked down. But I can guarantee, because
Speaker 7: there were posters of Effie because I was going to
Speaker 7: be doing a show there a couple of months later,
Speaker 7: for sure he would have.
Speaker 4: It. I actually I recently had a pretty upsetting I'm
Speaker 4: not going to say it's a mistaken identity, but I
Speaker 4: was in when we're forming the second season of Nine
Speaker 4: Perfect Strangers. We were in Munich for a long time
Speaker 4: and I was in. One of my best friends was
Speaker 4: also producing it, our friend Molly Allen, and we went
Speaker 4: to this really beautiful department store, like beautiful, and we're
Speaker 4: in this gorgeous department store and there was a sales
Speaker 4: I was like, oh my god, there was like a
Speaker 4: Jivanti dress that I would never be able to afford,
Speaker 4: but it was like a tenth of the price. This
Speaker 4: is important to the story. So I go into the
Speaker 4: change room and I'm like trying it on. And I
Speaker 4: probably should have gone to the bathroom because I was
Speaker 4: also had a little bit of a full bladder, which
Speaker 4: is kind of important to the story. So I'm basically
Speaker 4: my own business. I'm trying on this beautiful dress. And
Speaker 4: then I hear Molly kind of looking for me. I
Speaker 4: can hear her kind of on the outside look at me. Now,
Speaker 4: I just want to say, for the record, Molly looks great,
Speaker 4: but she is seven years older than me. Okay, so
Speaker 4: I hear her looking, and I just hear this German
Speaker 4: woman say to.
Speaker 6: Her, your mother is in there. I that was it.
Speaker 6: I peed, I.
Speaker 4: Dress, bought the dress, the dress paid in the Givanni laughing.
Speaker 4: I could not believe that someone thought I was her mother.
Speaker 6: No offense, Molly, but I had never.
Speaker 4: Was the accent your matha, she is in there. I
Speaker 4: So that was not mistaken identity, so much mistaken age
Speaker 4: in appropriateness. That's my recent hilarious.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, ks.
Speaker 3: What about you?
Speaker 2: Well, I used to go to La a fair bit
Speaker 2: for work. This is like going back maybe fourteen years ago,
Speaker 2: so you know, think me.
Speaker 1: I used to wear my hair up a lot. It
Speaker 1: was blonder.
Speaker 2: So the first time I went, people would like sort
Speaker 2: of you know when people overstare and you're like, oh,
Speaker 2: I mean I look all right, but I look that great.
Speaker 2: And then and then I got to Soho House, which
Speaker 2: is like a member's only club, which back then was
Speaker 2: super like, you know, it was full of it's still.
Speaker 3: It was.
Speaker 2: And I remember walking past, Oh gosh, I'm having a
Speaker 2: moment the two people from friends.
Speaker 7: Lucy Caldroux or Cornie and Jennifer, and I'm so excited
Speaker 7: to be just in La.
Speaker 2: So I just walked past and I'm like hi, and
Speaker 2: they're like Hi, just chatting away. And the lady that
Speaker 2: we were with said do you know who you look like?
Speaker 2: And she said Diane Krueger and I was like God.
Speaker 3: And then the rest of that trip, I swear better
Speaker 3: than Freddy Krueger. Well, I swear someone at someone.
Speaker 2: When we were doing the Hollywood Hills, they stopped and
Speaker 2: asked my photo and I was like.
Speaker 1: Who do you think I am? And they were like
Speaker 1: Dan Krueger, Literally, I think you.
Speaker 6: Look like a lot of people. Kay Winslow actually.
Speaker 3: Looks like Kay Winslet.
Speaker 1: I've got photos to share.
Speaker 2: You can see them, yes, But my favorite about the
Speaker 2: eyes when she smiles, no, because we have different tas.
Speaker 2: My favorite was when I was about sixteen illegally in
Speaker 2: a pub in South Wales and a guy was trying
Speaker 2: to tap on to me and he said to me,
Speaker 2: do you know who you look like and I was like,
Speaker 2: who he said, Whitney Houston.
Speaker 3: Sorry, that is such a great line.
Speaker 4: My God told me I looked like Britney Spears once
Speaker 4: and that was and it was right.
Speaker 1: In see a compliment.
Speaker 4: It was right after she'd shaved it, and she was
Speaker 4: like hitting people with.
Speaker 6: You did not specify the period.
Speaker 3: You just jumped in.
Speaker 5: And she's not great at the moment, like hasn't she
Speaker 5: just gone to pay prison or something? But Mary, are
Speaker 5: we going to talk about Tina Arena?
Speaker 7: Because yeah, people think I'm Tina Arena and they think
Speaker 7: Tina's me, and yeah, I mean, I just it is.
Speaker 4: Just give us a couple of bars, give us a
Speaker 4: couple from I.
Speaker 3: Did do a duet with Tina, which.
Speaker 6: Is one line, one line, Yeah, which was song did
Speaker 6: you of course?
Speaker 5: In chain?
Speaker 3: It's bad great.
Speaker 7: I recorded a comedy single as Effie with Norman Guns
Speaker 7: on the top twenty. Oh, Amigo's paras Emperor.
Speaker 3: Means you're stupid.
Speaker 6: It's such hidden talents.
Speaker 3: The talent. Oh my gosh, this thing gives me a gid.
Speaker 2: No, okay, I want to ask you all, how do
Speaker 2: you maintain your lady garden? Because I need to talk
Speaker 2: about my recent experience of getting a very aggressive wax. Yes,
Speaker 2: so I was doing a show in Brisbane and so
Speaker 2: not that I get my front bottom out in my show,
Speaker 2: but I wanted to be waxed, and during the show
Speaker 2: I talk a lot about my bottom hair, so I
Speaker 2: just thought I.
Speaker 1: Need to be it may be good to go.
Speaker 2: I can't have it it dangling and it is growing
Speaker 2: rather ferociously my back garden more than my front gardens.
Speaker 1: Anyway, So I'm booking in for a wax.
Speaker 2: I can't get in with the lovely lady that I
Speaker 2: normally go to see who likes listening to the podcast,
Speaker 2: so I just bookhim wherever I can get in, And
Speaker 2: it's in. It's in one of those nail salons, you know.
Speaker 2: It's a room at the back.
Speaker 5: Oh no, no, absolutely not.
Speaker 6: Going somewhere you've never been to.
Speaker 5: Do you just to wax your ainus? Absolutely not.
Speaker 1: You need to go down that bottom.
Speaker 2: It's all just kind of morphed into one bottom from
Speaker 2: front to back.
Speaker 1: It's just like a big long front and back thing.
Speaker 2: Anyway, I walk through the salon, I use that term
Speaker 2: sort of loosely.
Speaker 5: Yeah, they put that contact paper over the table.
Speaker 1: It gets worse.
Speaker 2: So I'm in what is basically a cupboard, which is fine,
Speaker 2: like it's got you know, it's got a pot of
Speaker 2: boiling wax, it's got wipes, and it's got the table.
Speaker 2: So the lady stays in the room.
Speaker 1: While I take my clothes on, and I.
Speaker 2: Was like a fla, well, but I'm not stealing the
Speaker 2: wax and I'm alright for baby wipe. So it wasn't
Speaker 2: like they had a lot of stock in there, but
Speaker 2: she stood there. And I'm at an age now when
Speaker 2: I take my undies off, like I don't want someone
Speaker 2: to see they're big undies. As we've established before, I
Speaker 2: tend to have a pad in there, not because I'm
Speaker 2: having a period, just because I'm hot and sweaty.
Speaker 1: So it's a bit of extra.
Speaker 5: So finish she's about to see your hairy.
Speaker 2: Don't want the illusion that I'm also walking around with
Speaker 2: like big pants and a pad.
Speaker 3: Different when you're lying down, yes and you covered, I think.
Speaker 2: It is anyway, So then I she's she's sort of there.
Speaker 1: I've put a bit of talcon too, because you know
Speaker 1: her roll.
Speaker 2: So touch her vibe just she is quite a small,
Speaker 2: petit lady.
Speaker 1: She's she's probably thirty at the most. She's got a COVID.
Speaker 2: Mask on, so she's probably gnarling behind it.
Speaker 5: I don't feel like you should be dropping your decks
Speaker 5: to this person.
Speaker 2: They're already on the floor with the pad facing up,
Speaker 2: and so now I'm lying there and how I roll
Speaker 2: is I've done laser down the side, so I'm neat
Speaker 2: at any at any point, like, I'm not going to
Speaker 2: be like having Coalais coming out with swimmers. But I've
Speaker 2: got like between the flappage is growing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the undercarriage.
Speaker 1: That's the undercarriage.
Speaker 2: So from like I have a little sort of bit
Speaker 2: at the top and then I have flap coverage and
Speaker 2: then just like a massive fucking crop circle of oss
Speaker 2: hair around, which is just what are.
Speaker 3: You fernalizing with?
Speaker 2: I don't know if it's just another joy of cars
Speaker 2: what happens, but you can look because it's now I
Speaker 2: don't have it anyway. So she literally I don't know
Speaker 2: if she'd had an argument with her partner that morning
Speaker 2: or if she was on a period and she was angry,
Speaker 2: Like I have never been ripped like that before. I
Speaker 2: mean literally, I didn't want to look at it. I
Speaker 2: didn't even know if everything was still attached. And then
Speaker 2: then I have to turn round.
Speaker 5: So you're on all fours.
Speaker 2: No, I'm lying down facing her, so she's doing front
Speaker 2: bump first, and then then I'm having to do like
Speaker 2: turnover to do back bump. And she's got me, oh,
Speaker 2: this is the other thing. Like I've never had a
Speaker 2: flat stomach in my life. You know, I just roll
Speaker 2: the way I roll. But Lily, she gets me to
Speaker 2: when we're doing the front bump, she's making me like
Speaker 2: pull the skin.
Speaker 1: I've kind of like hot.
Speaker 2: Hike bits, see it on her face. She's grabbing my
Speaker 2: toumube tum. She's like yanking it up with my hand
Speaker 2: and you're not doing that bit anyway. It gets worse
Speaker 2: when I'm on my front, so now you kind of
Speaker 2: like you know, lying on your front facing the pillow.
Speaker 1: Like the pillow. She then has got me.
Speaker 2: Spreading my legs and legs a bit in the air
Speaker 2: and like pulling my cheeks. So I look like, you know,
Speaker 2: and you can now buy a chicken that's just been squashed. Yeah,
Speaker 2: like flat, that's what I look like, except I look
Speaker 2: like friar tuck because I've got like you know band
Speaker 2: of merry men like the round sort of hair crop circle.
Speaker 2: And I tell you what, I've also got a skin
Speaker 2: tag on my bum which I checked with the doctor.
Speaker 1: I think she had it off. It's like, literally, I've
Speaker 1: never been in so much pain.
Speaker 2: I wanted to go home and like sit in an
Speaker 2: ice bucket? Was it was aggressive?
Speaker 6: Care a keV help me, help you?
Speaker 4: Yeah, you've sucking lost me at wags? Why ladies, does
Speaker 4: anyone wax anymore? Like laser laser? I've got one word,
Speaker 4: and I'm gonna say multiple times, laser laser laser. But
Speaker 4: a legend doing laser on your you would you You'd
Speaker 4: have to be the Portuguese chaluk?
Speaker 5: Would you holding everything there while they I don't know.
Speaker 2: I'm thinking about laser on the round, the back, but
Speaker 2: the front.
Speaker 1: Like our lady lips, they shrivel.
Speaker 2: Did you know that our mouth lips and our lady
Speaker 2: lips as we age shrivel. So at the moment, I've
Speaker 2: got a fairly neat handbag, But in a couple of
Speaker 2: years my giblets could be hanging out. Yes, I want
Speaker 2: to I know, I want to know that I'm not
Speaker 2: having to murk in I want to know I can
Speaker 2: grow the pubes over that if.
Speaker 1: I need to.
Speaker 4: My point is the laser is so advanced now it's crazy,
Speaker 4: it doesn't even hurt. So why anyone, I mean, would
Speaker 4: put themselves through that level of pain that is involved
Speaker 4: in waxing, particularly with a stranger that you've just decided
Speaker 4: to go.
Speaker 6: To in the middle, is beyond my comprehension.
Speaker 7: Look, I don't know about you girls, but gray hair
Speaker 7: starts to creep in after a while.
Speaker 3: You know, my mutunga. My mouth is looking like Richard Wilkins, Carol,
Speaker 3: it looks like frosted tips.
Speaker 4: I love that.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'm gonna add this.
Speaker 2: In so in my in my show, because I talk
Speaker 2: a lot about my pubic hair, and I talk about
Speaker 2: my changing pubic hair, I do.
Speaker 1: And so what I do is I.
Speaker 2: Have like a screen that says Cat's cuts, and I
Speaker 2: just take the audience through. I take the audience through
Speaker 2: my various stages of downstairs. And so I've got a
Speaker 2: photo of Guy Sebastian when he won Idol. Yes, if
Speaker 2: you're in the country, Bruner, but he has he had
Speaker 2: a very big afro. So when I landed in Australia,
Speaker 2: I had the guy Sebastian. Then I've got a picture
Speaker 2: of Shannon Nol because I had like the.
Speaker 1: Little I think we little one just under the I do.
Speaker 2: So I've had a guy Sebastian, and I've had a Shannon,
Speaker 2: and then my last photo is Stanley Tucci because I've
Speaker 2: also gone the full teach.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so Sally, who do you? Who are you? Out
Speaker 1: of those three?
Speaker 4: One of the joys of alopecia is that I don't
Speaker 4: really have any pubes like I have a few. They're
Speaker 4: gray so you can't really see them. But it does
Speaker 4: mean that I don't have to go into the back
Speaker 4: room at these awful little places. But I had almost
Speaker 4: the same experience but without my anus when I went.
Speaker 4: I was about to go to America to go on
Speaker 4: Good Morning America, first time I'd been on TV. And
Speaker 4: I went to get my nail stuck. So I was
Speaker 4: in the nail of salon and I'm getting my my
Speaker 4: pedicure and my thing, and then the lady who was
Speaker 4: doing it said, would you like me to do your
Speaker 4: mustache and your beard? No? And I, you know, very loudly,
Speaker 4: and I was, yes, I would, I guess, And so
Speaker 4: we went into that back room that you speak of
Speaker 4: with the laminate table, and I got on there and
Speaker 4: she got that wax you know, the one with the
Speaker 4: thin you know, the thin green.
Speaker 6: Yeah, they do the eyebrows, and.
Speaker 3: She did it because normally calico fabric that they.
Speaker 5: With the calico fabric.
Speaker 4: And she iced to me like a bun from like
Speaker 4: cheekbone to like neck, like right thing my whole face
Speaker 4: pretty much and just ripped these strips off afterwards, and
Speaker 4: I broke out in well, I was.
Speaker 1: About to say, aren't you going on, Telly?
Speaker 4: Yep, So I had I have very clever makeup, but
Speaker 4: I had welts when I was on Good Morning on
Speaker 4: my face, like open wounds. And that's what happens when
Speaker 4: you go into selling. What's your I mean, you know,
Speaker 4: I don't want to like, you know, say anything culturally,
Speaker 4: but you're a Mediterranean.
Speaker 7: Yeah, as f I said, when you're a Greek, it's
Speaker 7: November every month.
Speaker 3: So hair maintenance is a big thing. It's a full
Speaker 3: time job, if you know.
Speaker 7: Not for Bruner obviously not since La, but yeah, it
Speaker 7: can be a full time job.
Speaker 3: Do you like I wax?
Speaker 7: Look, I've done laser as well. Definitely reduced eighty percent
Speaker 7: of it's gone.
Speaker 5: On facial hair. Like, do you get facial hair?
Speaker 7: I don't mind a bit of threading, yeah, I mean,
Speaker 7: I don't know what you pay for.
Speaker 3: It's two bits of cotton.
Speaker 7: The procession is unbelievable, like a thread, and eyebrow is gorgeous.
Speaker 6: But how do you feel about hairy men?
Speaker 7: Well, my husband has no hair on his head. He's
Speaker 7: the first ball guy I've ever been with. He's not
Speaker 7: very hairy.
Speaker 3: Look the back, the back's a lot is there covered
Speaker 3: in hair?
Speaker 7: He's My husband's got a friend who was completely covered
Speaker 7: in hair, I mean mow hair.
Speaker 3: It's not a lot of hair, mow hair. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: I'm not a big fan.
Speaker 7: But I don't know about your husband's boyfriend's ex'es.
Speaker 3: You know whatever.
Speaker 7: But do they manscape because that's a nice thing that
Speaker 7: my husband does.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it does. But I really like a bit of
Speaker 5: hair on a like, not on their back we're.
Speaker 3: Talking about, but even manhood the nuts.
Speaker 4: Well, I do think a bit of nice manscaping is
Speaker 4: nice to just keep it, but certainly not when you
Speaker 4: wouldn't want them, you know, doing anything fancy down.
Speaker 1: There, but not dazzling it.
Speaker 5: No, I don't know.
Speaker 4: I think it's such a like new I'm not talking
Speaker 4: about guys I date. You know, there's a culture of
Speaker 4: like like a lot of waxing on man and I
Speaker 4: quite like that look.
Speaker 5: But the clean wax manscaping look.
Speaker 3: Look a lot of ethnic men like to pluck between
Speaker 3: their monos.
Speaker 7: Yeah, they want to get rid of free to Carlo,
Speaker 7: but sometimes it looks like the eyebrows of having a divorce.
Speaker 7: They just go too far, especially if they're doing it themselves.
Speaker 7: I mean JFK Junior, Right, did everyone see Love Story,
Speaker 7: the series on JFK and Carolyn Bassett? That was fantastic
Speaker 7: and the guy they got was was brilliant outside. JFK
Speaker 7: Junior was a hairy guy, wasn't it. He was like
Speaker 7: gorgeous and I liked it.
Speaker 3: Animal lie.
Speaker 7: Yes, you know, so I think that they had, from
Speaker 7: what I read, had trouble casting a guy that had
Speaker 7: you know, the hat hair.
Speaker 6: Wow. Wow?
Speaker 1: Okay, Mary, do you need the talking stec oh?
Speaker 6: Yes?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 3: So why does the car turn us into different people?
Speaker 3: You know?
Speaker 7: I always think of the car as the cone of silence,
Speaker 7: like this is the one safe place, the last politically
Speaker 7: incorrect place where the animal in us, the unreasonable, paranoid
Speaker 7: blaming person in US can say and do whatever we want,
Speaker 7: Like there is no judgment in a car. I mean
Speaker 7: unless you know you're picking your nose or something like
Speaker 7: that people, but people think you're talking on the phone
Speaker 7: or whatever. Now I am really a very patient person,
Speaker 7: except when I'm in the car. Suddenly everyone's doing everything wrong. Now,
Speaker 7: a while back, I was stopped at a set of lights.
Speaker 7: I was maybe the fourth car at this set of
Speaker 7: red lights. Now we know the protocol with driving right.
Speaker 7: When the light changes, the car in front moves to
Speaker 7: the middle of the section to turn right and waits
Speaker 7: that way. You know, at least the first second, possibly
Speaker 7: even third car will get through the lights.
Speaker 3: Well, I was stopped at these sets of lights, and
Speaker 3: I was four.
Speaker 7: Cars back, and we were stuck there for three different
Speaker 7: change of lights.
Speaker 3: No movement at the station. Now I am swearing. I
Speaker 3: am really getting aggressive.
Speaker 5: Now I've had enough to swear in Greek if you're
Speaker 5: really mad.
Speaker 7: Like sometimes, you know, like I was just going feral.
Speaker 7: The two cars in front of me and the number
Speaker 7: one car got so frustrated they pulled out and decided
Speaker 7: to go in a different direction, and then I realized
Speaker 7: that the car that was turning right was my mother.
Speaker 3: Everything under the sun. I didn't know it was a woman,
Speaker 3: but you know, an idiot.
Speaker 4: What's the matter with mad that I do get a
Speaker 4: bit of road My kids are like, Mum, how are you?
Speaker 4: I'm so afraid I'm gonna get road ranges and be
Speaker 4: someone I know. But I got to say I have
Speaker 4: a very special as needed by what people do in cars.
Speaker 4: I love being stopped at lights and seeing people like
Speaker 4: putting on there I may car, eating a bowl of cereal,
Speaker 4: you know, like it's a lot right. And my favorite
Speaker 4: thing about being in my car is when I try
Speaker 4: thanklessly to like and unsuccessfully use the hands free like
Speaker 4: every time I say call Mary coustas it says call
Speaker 4: Merry Christmas. Every single I have called so many wrong
Speaker 4: people using that thing.
Speaker 5: And then you end up shouting it.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: But my worst thing about cars because I'm pretty clean
Speaker 4: in a car, like a clean car, but my husband
Speaker 4: borrows my car when I travel and I and I'll
Speaker 4: put I'm gonna put the video up on the Unleashed
Speaker 4: Socials because this happened to me yesterday. I'm just gonna
Speaker 4: let you guys see it on Unleashed socials, what he
Speaker 4: leaves in the car when he's borrowed my car. I'm
Speaker 4: with Steve, like, my car looks like a student's. It's
Speaker 4: got McDonald's rappers all over the floor, it's got gum,
Speaker 4: it's got all the most new car. Yeah, I know,
Speaker 4: I've been trying a little bit harder, but look, I
Speaker 4: think that we do. I think it bodes well for
Speaker 4: me if it does show our true personality in the
Speaker 4: car because I am extraordinarily calm in the car. People
Speaker 4: often comment how I just never go for the horn.
Speaker 4: I will just because if I'm a bit frightened, I'm
Speaker 4: concentrating on driving, like it's just not my automatic reaction.
Speaker 4: And in fact, once I lived in Canada right before
Speaker 4: I got married, and when I was pregnant with my
Speaker 4: first child, and there was a time I was in
Speaker 4: the car driving to the Rockies. I was six months pregnant,
Speaker 4: my husband was in the front seat, and my dad,
Speaker 4: who was visiting from Australia, was in the back seat.
Speaker 4: So we've got three generations of my family that could
Speaker 4: potentially get wiped out. And we hit the black ice
Speaker 4: on the motorway and the way.
Speaker 6: Oh my god.
Speaker 4: That happened a few times when I was there, and
Speaker 4: I'd done a defensive driving course, But this time, as
Speaker 4: soon as I knew, as soon as I hit it,
Speaker 4: there was nothing I could do, and so I was
Speaker 4: doing what I'd been taught was just to sort of
Speaker 4: pumper the brain. The car turned was backwards and it
Speaker 4: was going down the motorway backwards, still on the thing.
Speaker 4: And as it was happening in my family gives me
Speaker 4: shit about this, like all these years later. But as
Speaker 4: we are going backwards and like flying down the motorway backwards,
Speaker 4: I was saying, it's all right, everything's fine, Everything's going
Speaker 4: to be okay. We were going backwards, so we ended
Speaker 4: up we went backwards. We sort of flew along there
Speaker 4: for a while, and then we went off into a
Speaker 4: ditch and stopped. But right after we went into the ditch,
Speaker 4: another car came up behind and smashed into the car
Speaker 4: in front.
Speaker 5: So we kind of just got out of the way.
Speaker 4: But I think that there's something and I think I
Speaker 4: do do this in life too, when things become really
Speaker 4: stressful and scary, I go down to like a deeper,
Speaker 4: kind of quiet, calmer place.
Speaker 1: I think I wouldn't have been the car with the
Speaker 1: air with that sounds.
Speaker 4: I mean, I still hit the ice and went into
Speaker 4: the ditch. So it's not that I'm a fantastic driver,
Speaker 4: but Tay, I definitely don't go to screaming.
Speaker 5: I don't want to add to the car.
Speaker 4: So if you guys like Karma drive and I'm someone,
Speaker 4: just bear in mind. I don't even like getting in
Speaker 4: the back of Uber. But I am obsessed with the Weaimo,
Speaker 4: the self driving cars in LA.
Speaker 2: WHOA, hang on a second, what is a Weaimo? Are
Speaker 2: we in the future?
Speaker 4: So a Weaimo is a self driving car. They basically
Speaker 4: act like Ubers, but there is no one driving them.
Speaker 4: The wheel is turning on its owner. In America, they
Speaker 4: are in various states in America, but certainly in Los
Speaker 4: Angeles they are everywhere. And when I first started seeing them,
Speaker 4: I was like, there's no way to ever get it.
Speaker 2: For sure.
Speaker 3: You don't even let anyone drive.
Speaker 6: Being driven, And it's so weird.
Speaker 4: You're you're in these streets in Los Angeles and you're
Speaker 4: just you're sitting at lights and there's someone in the
Speaker 4: back of a car and there's no one driving in
Speaker 4: the weird excellct my kids who are like my son's like,
Speaker 4: come on, mum, let's go. We're gonna do this. We're
Speaker 4: getting in Well, once I did it once, I'm kind
Speaker 4: of addicted as ant. Isn't it like not have to
Speaker 4: even speak to your exact driver? Now some people believe
Speaker 4: that they're listening to everything you're saying.
Speaker 1: How does it work, Britner? Is it like a new
Speaker 1: bra app?
Speaker 4: Yeah? So when I first heard about it, you had
Speaker 4: to get someone to refer you to get the app.
Speaker 4: Now I think anyone can download the app, so yes,
Speaker 4: you doubt it's w A Y M O. So you
Speaker 4: download the app in the same way you would any
Speaker 4: on your phone, and you put in your details in
Speaker 4: your credit card, and you order it exactly as you
Speaker 4: would an uber.
Speaker 1: Right, how does it like?
Speaker 2: I get that it would have the directions, but how
Speaker 2: does it know when it's a red light?
Speaker 4: It's got cameras, so if you see them, there are
Speaker 4: rotating cameras on the roof. Literally the car is surrounded
Speaker 4: by cameras, so it's seeing.
Speaker 3: It's seeing far more.
Speaker 6: Than you would ever see as a driver of a car.
Speaker 5: So do they care if you have sex? In the back.
Speaker 6: I'm sure the camera.
Speaker 5: You could go viral.
Speaker 4: No, that's a great question, and I'm sure people have
Speaker 4: no doubt you're allowed to sit in front seat.
Speaker 6: I never have.
Speaker 4: I've only ever sat in the back seat. The only
Speaker 4: place you can't set is in the driver's seat. And
Speaker 4: what you can't do is, like, you know, try and
Speaker 4: take the wheel. You can't because it will like some
Speaker 4: kind of crazy alarm will go off and you are
Speaker 4: definitely locked in there. So the car arrives, you say,
Speaker 4: open door, The doors open, You step into the most
Speaker 4: beautiful cart. You buckle your seatbelt, and then there's this
Speaker 4: screen right in front of you in the back seat,
Speaker 4: and before you touch anything, it says, hello, brunner, that's cool. Wow,
Speaker 4: And then you push start right and then it just
Speaker 4: takes off. Now it does take a little longer to
Speaker 4: get places because it's not taking anyway.
Speaker 3: Well, that was the next thing.
Speaker 7: Look, one of the best things about being in a
Speaker 7: taxi not so much Ubers.
Speaker 3: Although occasionally maybe you can negotiate.
Speaker 7: You dictate which road you want to take in order
Speaker 7: to get to where you want to get to it.
Speaker 3: If you've been to that place a lot, you know you.
Speaker 5: Would love this.
Speaker 4: My son because he hates going in the car with
Speaker 4: me any because he knows that I'm going to try
Speaker 4: and engage him in a some kind of conversation about
Speaker 4: I try to impart some wisdom. And recently he said
Speaker 4: to me when I was going we had to go
Speaker 4: to Southland, and he said, just before we get in,
Speaker 4: you have to promise me that you're not going to
Speaker 4: ask me about enthusiastic consent or masturbation. My kids love it,
Speaker 4: and a lot of parents feel safe for putting their kid.
Speaker 4: I put my kid and he'd never been in an uber. Yeah,
Speaker 4: and he took his first ride on his own in
Speaker 4: a Way Mow because a lot of people just see that. Yeah,
Speaker 4: there's no safer. Totally, I don't think our kids. Look,
Speaker 4: got kids are in thirteen. I'm not sure they'll learn
Speaker 4: to drive. I mean I think at some point, very
Speaker 4: soon everything will be self driving cars. I mean, I'm
Speaker 4: a control freak, but I'm obsessed talk about things you
Speaker 4: can do in the in cars.
Speaker 3: Totally.
Speaker 4: I just want to know if the Way Mow is
Speaker 4: going to be as calm as I was when it
Speaker 4: hits the black ice and it's flying down the Highway backwards.
Speaker 2: All right, it's time for burning questions. This is where
Speaker 2: we throw out something that's been stuck in our heads
Speaker 2: all week.
Speaker 3: Yep.
Speaker 1: I know we're all powerful, great smart women.
Speaker 2: We will say we have no regrets, but I actually
Speaker 2: want to know if you had an undo button for
Speaker 2: one specific decision or purchase, what would you erase?
Speaker 1: Mary?
Speaker 7: Okay, So we've been talking about cars, and I was
Speaker 7: always a big, you know, car fan.
Speaker 3: I loved cars.
Speaker 7: So I bought a car that I'd never even heard of.
Speaker 7: I bought it through the trading post. Do you remember
Speaker 7: the old trading newspaper? And when I bought it home,
Speaker 7: my dad said it was so small. He said, you
Speaker 7: didn't buy a car, you bought a box of matches.
Speaker 7: And I'd come out of nightclubs thinking it had been stolen.
Speaker 7: It w'd been parked next with Sedan. This car I
Speaker 7: had nowhere to store. And eventually I sold it maybe
Speaker 7: fifteen years into having it. And it was my most
Speaker 7: reliable car. It was a Honda S eight hundred. It
Speaker 7: was designed to rival the MG, which you did, and
Speaker 7: then had a motorbike engine in it.
Speaker 3: It was fantastic.
Speaker 7: It was a coop model so I had to sell it,
Speaker 7: only to discover recently that that car that I paid
Speaker 7: three thousand dollars for is now worth anything between fifty
Speaker 7: five and ninety thousand dollars.
Speaker 3: Yes. Wow, so I do have that regret. Plus I
Speaker 3: loved it. It was such a fun car.
Speaker 5: Oh, we have to see a picture of it. I
Speaker 5: want to see that.
Speaker 3: I'll give over a picture so we can put on
Speaker 3: our socials.
Speaker 1: Sal what's your and do button?
Speaker 5: I mean, it's hard to find it.
Speaker 4: I regret every purchase that I've ever made when I
Speaker 4: thought that I was going to be a different person,
Speaker 4: like you know, you know when you starting a new
Speaker 4: fitness regime. I have got weights at home. I have
Speaker 4: so many bloody weights. Since there's me thinking I'm going
Speaker 4: to do the strength training. I've never lifted a weight.
Speaker 5: I'm not interested in doing that at all.
Speaker 4: I've got a football, you know, I've got those rollly
Speaker 4: things that you buy it this see. I love buying stuff,
Speaker 4: and so a lot of the stuff that I buy
Speaker 4: sits there and reminds me and makes me feel guilty.
Speaker 1: Bruna, what's your do button?
Speaker 4: I mean? I try not to have any regrets, but
Speaker 4: I might undo half the guys I had sex, you know,
Speaker 4: I mean, I wasn't fully in my own senses, or
Speaker 4: i'd certainly use more birth control, especially if what they're
Speaker 4: saying on the manosphere is true that a little part
Speaker 4: of every man that we have sex with like lodges
Speaker 4: itself into our day about clear.
Speaker 5: Ju I mean, I think little Weenie, well, it's a
Speaker 5: little part that was all over. I mean, I think
Speaker 5: it's fake news.
Speaker 6: But like, come on, that's not true. I would undo.
Speaker 4: I mean, speaking of Mary and me and Friedman knew
Speaker 4: me in this time where you know, I was let's say,
Speaker 4: drinking a little more and parting a bit more than
Speaker 4: a lot more than now. But I do remember, and
Speaker 4: I am I this is one thing i'd undo. I
Speaker 4: may have had a few drinks and I went home
Speaker 4: with an actor actually but I won't name him. And
Speaker 4: we woke up the next morning and he said to me, oh,
Speaker 4: I'm just going to go and have a shower.
Speaker 6: And I said, all right, I was very young, and
Speaker 6: I'm going to go to a shower.
Speaker 4: And if the phone rings don't answer it, it might
Speaker 4: be my girlfriend. Oh wow, And I just like you
Speaker 4: might have mentioned that before the sex, and that I
Speaker 4: probably would undo that because that was not my vibe. Yeah,
Speaker 4: but that's not your mistake either. That was the bit
Speaker 4: you might want to one do is not throwing his
Speaker 4: phone and his clothes out the window at that.
Speaker 1: Point exactly mine and my eyebrows.
Speaker 3: Yeah, please explain.
Speaker 2: I feel like, no, we're full circling back to your
Speaker 2: comment earlier or comes back to overplucked. And as it
Speaker 2: was getting closer to my wedding, my hairdresser was like,
Speaker 2: you've just got a can you throw them a bit?
Speaker 2: And you know, I tried, but you know what, you
Speaker 2: sort of pluck one or two and then suddenly they're
Speaker 2: really thin. I married somebody who was in the public eye,
Speaker 2: and so there are photos of me and Andrew and
Speaker 2: the fact that I didn't invite my eyebrows to the wedding.
Speaker 7: Can I just say, for anyone that doesn't know, you
Speaker 7: were married to Andrew John's, yes, a legendary NROL player.
Speaker 5: Yeah, not Daniel John's from Silver Chair, which.
Speaker 2: Is so anyway, I managed to grow my eyebrows back,
Speaker 2: so it was great, but this photo of me, you know,
Speaker 2: with my no eyebrows, came back to bite me on
Speaker 2: the bum because Andrew and I split up. He moved
Speaker 2: on with Daniel Craig's ex fiance, so it was big news.
Speaker 1: It was big news.
Speaker 2: You can google me and Daniel Craig and they're all
Speaker 2: on the red carpet, Andrew's looking fabulous, and the photos
Speaker 2: around the world. Oh my wedding photo without my eyebrows. Yes,
Speaker 2: it's not good. We can share that on the socials.
Speaker 4: Oh my god.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I want to see these brows, these famous breads.
Speaker 4: So you've got your brows circulating the world and your
Speaker 4: hand which is around your son's in the photo of you,
Speaker 4: and wow, famous body part.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 1: I am.
Speaker 2: My other main regret I only have two is the
Speaker 2: night that George Michael was playing in Sydney.
Speaker 1: Lewis had been up sick.
Speaker 2: He was a two year old, and because I've been
Speaker 2: at Sony Music a long time and got loads of
Speaker 2: concert you know, free concerts, I was very lucky. I
Speaker 2: was like, I can't go, I'm so tired. I'll see
Speaker 2: him next time. And then the next time he bloody died.
Speaker 3: I know, such a big loss.
Speaker 2: I could actually cry about George Michael. So they would
Speaker 2: be my two regrets. Get to George Michael and don't
Speaker 2: pluck there you go. Yeah, it's time for us to
Speaker 2: solve other people's problems.
Speaker 1: Yayay, we love this segment.
Speaker 2: This is where you send us your real life mess
Speaker 2: and we become your completely unqualified agony ants. Today's problem
Speaker 2: is from anonymous Dear Unleashed. I have a polite relationship
Speaker 2: with my neighbors. On several occasions, when the wife has
Speaker 2: been away, I've noticed another woman leaving the house late
Speaker 2: at night or early in the morning. It could have
Speaker 2: been you. Should I mind my own business? Or should
Speaker 2: I let the wife know what I've seen? Ladies, what
Speaker 2: do we think?
Speaker 3: Sally? You wrote a book called The Family next Door?
Speaker 1: What would you do?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 5: Or don't mind your own business? I mean that's boring.
Speaker 4: I think that there is a secret option number three,
Speaker 4: which is well, that she can be the missus mangle.
Speaker 5: You know, she's going to be at her front.
Speaker 4: I hope everyone understandsis reference.
Speaker 1: She was a busybody.
Speaker 4: She was the proverbial you know, cracking the blinds at
Speaker 4: the front of the house and keeping her eye on
Speaker 4: what was going on. And in this case, I think
Speaker 4: it would be really fun if she just made it
Speaker 4: clear to him that she knew, So she needs to
Speaker 4: be very pointed about seeing that, you know, flick the
Speaker 4: light on, make sure it's known. And then she needs
Speaker 4: to befriend the wife. So every time he comes home
Speaker 4: from work, she's sitting there having scones with the wife.
Speaker 4: She gives him the look he knows she knows, fuck
Speaker 4: with him.
Speaker 7: Oh, you should write books, Sally. I like it as
Speaker 7: a piece of drama, But you are living next door
Speaker 7: to a whole situation, and we don't know what the
Speaker 7: story is with that couple. In order for him to
Speaker 7: be doing that, I'm not saying that you know he's
Speaker 7: he's doing the right thing, but I also know that
Speaker 7: almost every current affair episode I've ever seen has been
Speaker 7: like what happens in that house and the effect that
Speaker 7: it has on the other house, and people are calling
Speaker 7: the cops and the guy next door whistles too much,
Speaker 7: or they're they're mowing the lawn at seven am in
Speaker 7: the morning.
Speaker 3: I just think it would make for a war zone.
Speaker 5: This is my favorite bit. Look, I just love the
Speaker 5: pettier the better about neighborly war. I think it's fantastic.
Speaker 6: Want to write a d.
Speaker 4: Has very much a neighborhood book, right, I do enjoy it.
Speaker 4: If Sally is channeling her own characters, I would do nothing.
Speaker 4: I'm sorry, but I'm kind of with Mary. You do
Speaker 4: not know what reaction you're going to get. And if
Speaker 4: I'm in America, I'm really doing nothing.
Speaker 1: Oh absolutely not.
Speaker 7: But also you don't know what the reaction is going
Speaker 7: to be. All of us are close to a lot
Speaker 7: of women. Half of our friends we would tell the
Speaker 7: truth to and half we wouldn't. And you are basing
Speaker 7: that decision on one whether you've had the conversation. Sometimes
Speaker 7: a friend will say, if you ever hear of anything, I.
Speaker 6: Want to know.
Speaker 7: Others will say I'd rather not know. And sometimes if
Speaker 7: you were just to, you know, give over that information,
Speaker 7: you might lose that friend forever. Yeah, you know, you
Speaker 7: think you're doing the right thing, and sometimes you know
Speaker 7: it's not taking it all well.
Speaker 4: But this is not suggesting that she actually tell her
Speaker 4: or him. It's just that she puts a little bit
Speaker 4: of like gentle pressure that maybe he comes clean and
Speaker 4: does the right thing for this is a gratiation perhaps.
Speaker 6: I mean, it depends on the relationship, I think.
Speaker 5: I mean, if they're just neighbors, you guys are no fun.
Speaker 4: But I'm with Mary. That can backfire. And even when
Speaker 4: someone breaks up like a friend and you go, yeah,
Speaker 4: then you unload every you unload the truth. I would
Speaker 4: say fifty percent of the time they're back together exactly.
Speaker 5: Well, that's friends. This is maybe you get to have
Speaker 5: some fue, you get to play god. This is what
Speaker 5: it's all about.
Speaker 4: In fact, by the way, neighbors they always talk about
Speaker 4: how when there's a serial killer living next door, or
Speaker 4: you know, someone's had the girls in the basement, they
Speaker 4: always kind of say, oh, he was such a nice man,
Speaker 4: and you know, you never would have known. And I
Speaker 4: always think I would have known. I would have known,
Speaker 4: I'm missus mangle at the cracks of the thing. I
Speaker 4: would have known that about the women in the basement.
Speaker 4: I would have been the hero, and you guys all
Speaker 4: would have been.
Speaker 7: Before we lived next door to a family we were
Speaker 7: close to. This is how bad my mother would be
Speaker 7: at neighborhood Watch. The man is bored for thirteen years
Speaker 7: up until the day before this day, and then the
Speaker 7: next day he's got a ponytail, and.
Speaker 3: My mother says, something's changed.
Speaker 1: I don't know what it is.
Speaker 3: And I said he was bored for thirteen years. Today
Speaker 3: he's got a ponytail. What do you think it is?
Speaker 2: That?
Speaker 4: It so my mother would not be you guys, I'm
Speaker 4: the one when they have got You know, if anyone
Speaker 4: knows anything.
Speaker 5: Called in everywhere, you're all thanking your lucky stars for me.
Speaker 5: So you can say you're.
Speaker 3: Next door to Sally.
Speaker 6: That's the Maralen story here.
Speaker 5: Yeah, totally.
Speaker 2: Okay, ladies, it's time the blast from the past. This
Speaker 2: is where we go back in time to a moment
Speaker 2: that we want to reshare.
Speaker 1: Who was your first pash? Who wants to start? Who's
Speaker 1: taken out?
Speaker 4: Because this this moment is embedded in my and I
Speaker 4: don't remember a lot, but this moment's embedded. I went
Speaker 4: to a pretty rough school local to my house, and
Speaker 4: I remember there was a plan for my first pash
Speaker 4: for a guy I had a crash on, Michael. I
Speaker 4: will leave his last name out of it for the
Speaker 4: sake of those involved. And I knew we were going
Speaker 4: to like have a meeting behind the sports shed and
Speaker 4: everyone was going to come watch.
Speaker 6: I was like, I don't know, be thirteen.
Speaker 4: Fourteen, okay, And I practiced with a tennis ball.
Speaker 3: It's got to be cus anyway, the whole.
Speaker 5: You cut a hole in as.
Speaker 4: So you cut so the tennis ball was like a mouth,
Speaker 4: and so you could like stick your tongue in. I
Speaker 4: might have exactly, and I might have put like a
Speaker 4: little face on it with like a mouth.
Speaker 5: You can tell she was producing with the rest of us.
Speaker 5: Did it with a mirror?
Speaker 4: Yeah, So I practiced and then I turn up and
Speaker 4: basically the whole school turns up to watch, like oh,
Speaker 4: and I bit his tongue. And I never lived it
Speaker 4: down for like basically ever.
Speaker 5: Because like tennis ball doesn't have a tongue.
Speaker 4: No, I don't know, I just you know, the tongue.
Speaker 4: I was kind of a lay bloomer, believe it or not.
Speaker 4: But that was like that moment is embedded in my mind.
Speaker 4: My first pash, and we used to have like pash
Speaker 4: best as I got older, you know what I mean,
Speaker 4: like pashing pashing for those who don't know what that means,
Speaker 4: Like you know, like donk kiss, did you draw blood?
Speaker 6: I don't.
Speaker 4: I don't remember. I don't think I drew blood. It
Speaker 4: was more I drew my own embarrassment. Like it was
Speaker 4: just one of the most defining moments.
Speaker 5: I mean, you should know that you're not supposed to
Speaker 5: buy it. Yeah, what about you, Sally, what was your
Speaker 5: first past?
Speaker 4: Look?
Speaker 5: It might surprise you to hear.
Speaker 4: That I was very desperate to have my first kiss.
Speaker 5: I was again late.
Speaker 4: Everyone all of my friends had kissed and I just
Speaker 4: really wanted it and no one was interested in kissing me.
Speaker 4: You know, did you go to n I went to
Speaker 4: an all girls convent school and everyone they were there,
Speaker 4: the biggest sluts, you know, don't they?
Speaker 5: And sorry I shouldn't say that.
Speaker 3: But question were girls kissing girls? No?
Speaker 5: No, not really, I mean, or not that I knew of.
Speaker 4: And so everyone had had their go and I was
Speaker 4: and it got to the point where people were asking
Speaker 4: their brothers, you know, can.
Speaker 6: You And I got one?
Speaker 4: I got a gig was and I went and met
Speaker 4: him after school. We stood beside the rubbish bins and
Speaker 4: again friends romantic, yeah nice and dirty I could smell it,
Speaker 4: you know that, and friends around the corner waiting and
Speaker 4: probably peeking around the corner. And we had the kid.
Speaker 4: It was so short, like we barely no time to
Speaker 4: bite tongues or anything.
Speaker 5: And then he kind of pushed me back a little
Speaker 5: bit and said, whoa easy tiger.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I died. So I died.
Speaker 4: I walked back to my friends with my head hung
Speaker 4: and we walked away and I never spoke to him
Speaker 4: or saw him again.
Speaker 6: Oh my god.
Speaker 3: Well I have a similar story, but not quite. It
Speaker 3: wasn't the same.
Speaker 7: So I went out with a boy that was the
Speaker 7: most popular family at our school.
Speaker 3: He was one year younger than me.
Speaker 6: His name Mary Simon Simon.
Speaker 7: Okay, anyway, Simon's family were the family.
Speaker 3: They had perpetual tans.
Speaker 7: They had a Georgian house, they had a unicycle, they
Speaker 7: had a pull.
Speaker 3: They had everything. I don't know. That was the bit
Speaker 3: that I didn't get either.
Speaker 7: Anyway, So I'm going out with Simon, and I, like Bruna,
Speaker 7: had practiced my pashing, but on citrus fruits because you
Speaker 7: can get the tongue in and out.
Speaker 3: It's nice and moist and plus it's good for you.
Speaker 7: So anyway, he walked me home from school, and I
Speaker 7: had this fantasy, and I've been practicing it in my
Speaker 7: mind that he would push me up against a cyclone.
Speaker 3: Fence, you know, because it's a bit of bounce.
Speaker 7: But you're vertical, and that I would slide my hands
Speaker 7: into his gene packed back pockets and I would squeeze
Speaker 7: his botox and then I would do my pashing. Well,
Speaker 7: it didn't happen like that. He walked me home. There
Speaker 7: was one of those low red brick fences that are
Speaker 7: sort of pathetic. They're not even a fence, and we
Speaker 7: sat down there and then it was time for us
Speaker 7: to do our big pash, and I pashed him and
Speaker 7: I put a lot into it, because I've been going
Speaker 7: a lot. It was time for the show. And then
Speaker 7: he pushed back and he said, I don't think we
Speaker 7: should pash. And these words have never been outed before
Speaker 7: if it's above twenty six degrees celsius.
Speaker 3: It was the last few days of November.
Speaker 7: Summer was literally less than a week away, and I
Speaker 7: remember at the time thinking, thank God for my sense
Speaker 7: of humor. I remember thinking, I don't think anyone's ever
Speaker 7: broken up over weather issues like this. He's done me
Speaker 7: and that was the end of this big romance between
Speaker 7: me and the.
Speaker 4: Ten dimon So getting the feeling that that because basically
Speaker 4: what you just described was what I did against the
Speaker 4: rubbish bins with Gareth, and perhaps men weren't into that.
Speaker 6: Mary too aggressive well.
Speaker 1: I'd like to take you back.
Speaker 2: I can take you back to the movie because we
Speaker 2: were all going to go, Yeah, we were all going
Speaker 2: to go on a double date. There was about twenty
Speaker 2: of us. I'm thirteen. I'm going with Rob Jeffries, who
Speaker 2: played the French horn. I never saw us his own
Speaker 2: French horns French horn. He just carry's massive French horn. Anyway,
Speaker 2: I used to get called slaphead at school because I
Speaker 2: would I would like pull my hair back into a ponytail,
Speaker 2: so I would get called slaphead. Anyway, we sat watching
Speaker 2: Never Ending Story in the cinema and the Princess do
Speaker 2: you remember, like she had like the little drop down,
Speaker 2: beautiful kind of bedueled.
Speaker 5: Thing nice on the slappad she had a.
Speaker 2: Slaphead And Stephen Phillips turned around and said, you look
Speaker 2: like her.
Speaker 1: So I was just like so happy.
Speaker 2: Anyway, we all mill out of the cinema and it's
Speaker 2: sort of winter time. It's really quiet where you know,
Speaker 2: we're by the beach and we stand up against a
Speaker 2: fish and chip shop that's closed. Rob and I and
Speaker 2: I've watched a lot of Dynasty in Dallas, yes, and
Speaker 2: I know what passion is snogging, and so I close
Speaker 2: my eyes. He closes his eyes. I go massive, open mouth.
Speaker 2: He's very closed.
Speaker 1: His nose is in my mouth.
Speaker 3: Tell me that your tongue.
Speaker 5: I feel.
Speaker 4: The common denominator of these is that they were cracked.
Speaker 4: Women are watching different movies to them in yeah.
Speaker 1: Was watching here. I don't know what he was. I
Speaker 1: love Rob, Rob, if you're listening, sweet bond memory.
Speaker 5: She'll give you another go now.
Speaker 1: I got I got.
Speaker 2: Banned from the landline because you know when back in
Speaker 2: the landline days, I used to just speak to him
Speaker 2: every night for hours about dinner and stuff. And then
Speaker 2: mum and dad put an egg timer by the phone
Speaker 2: and I could only speak to him for this last time.
Speaker 1: She Rob Jeffrey Rob, if you're listening's in my book.
Speaker 5: We had this single now and baby she could give
Speaker 5: it another go. She promises not to get your nose.
Speaker 1: What about it?
Speaker 2: French shrn And if you've still got the.
Speaker 5: Before, we make that right.
Speaker 2: Well on that note, Rob's horn and all the other
Speaker 2: things that we've discussed today.
Speaker 1: Thank you for listening to Unleashed.
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Speaker 2: Come on, I know, so they just need to hit
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Speaker 2: because I don't remember to do stuff. Everyone wants one
Speaker 2: less thing to do on the to do list. Surely, Okay,
Speaker 2: until next time, Stay unfiltered, stay unreasonable, Stay unleash, Stay
Speaker 2: unlea next Tuesday. So that's Unleashed. If you like that,
Speaker 2: if any part of it made you laugh, you can
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Speaker 2: you've been here since the four five six Club, thank
Speaker 2: you truly, I'd love you to come with me