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Speaker 1: You're listening to a mother and Mia podcast.

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Speaker 2: Mama Maya acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters

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Speaker 2: that this podcast is recorded on. Hello, it's Maya popping

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Speaker 2: into your ears to share another interview with Naomi Watts. Well,

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Speaker 2: it's kind of an interview. So many of you loved

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Speaker 2: the conversation that we had earlier in the week about

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Speaker 2: her book Dare I Say It, and her experience with

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Speaker 2: early menopause and what her life has been like.

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Speaker 1: Scroll back in your feet and listen to that if

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Speaker 1: you missed it. But I wanted to drop this episode

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Speaker 1: back into your feed because you might have missed it

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Speaker 1: from last year. It was a conversation I had with

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Speaker 1: Naomi and Alison bray Dado, who used to be a

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Speaker 1: Dolly model and has become a menopause advocate like Naomi,

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Speaker 1: and also doctor Ginny Mansberg, who's written a brilliant book

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Speaker 1: called The m Word about menopause. We sat down at

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Speaker 1: south By Southwest and I talk to them in a

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Speaker 1: bit of a panel style conversation about I guess the

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Speaker 1: Bermuda triangle of women's health, the funny and the hot

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Speaker 1: mess stuff, personal stories and some advice, and they get

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Speaker 1: very real about the roller coaster that is menopause and

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Speaker 1: perimenopause and the chaos and all of those things. So

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Speaker 1: have a listen and enjoy from Momma Mia. I'm Meya Friedman,

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Speaker 1: and you're listening to a very different episode of No Filter.

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Speaker 1: Does that make you nervous? Some people don't like change.

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Speaker 1: I like change. One change that we're going to talk

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Speaker 1: about today is the change of menopause. Perimenopause, the stuff

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Speaker 1: that happens to women as we get older, every woman.

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Speaker 1: This episode is a special one because it's me interviewing

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Speaker 1: three women on stage at south By Southwest that was

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Speaker 1: held in Sydney. They're amazing women. Actress Naomi Watts who's

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Speaker 1: also a business owner, Alison bray Datto who many people

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Speaker 1: will remember as a dolling model but she's now an

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Speaker 1: author and an educator, and doctor Jenny Mansburg. They're all

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Speaker 1: experts in their own way about menopause. They're all women

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Speaker 1: in their fifties. Hopefully our generation will be the last

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Speaker 1: to have shame around this topic menopause and perimenopause. It

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Speaker 1: was a funny conversation. I enjoyed it so much, and

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Speaker 1: so we decided to turn it into a bit of

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Speaker 1: a podcast and bring it to you. Now. There's advice,

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Speaker 1: there's personal stories, there's myth busting. It gets funny, it

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Speaker 1: gets rude, it gets emotional. You can love it. Here's

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Speaker 1: Naomi Watts, Allison Bray, Daddo, doctor Jenny Mansburg and me. Hello.

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Speaker 1: We're like the Beatles, but with hot flashes. What a

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Speaker 1: treat to be sitting with for such accomplished women who

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Speaker 1: are all in their fifties, all of us, and talking

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Speaker 1: about something that until recently wasn't discussed much and no

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Speaker 1: one wanted to really be associated with. But on our stage,

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Speaker 1: we've got two women who've written books on the topic.

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Speaker 1: We've got one woman who's launched a business catering to

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Speaker 1: women going through menopause. And we're very excited to be

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Speaker 1: bringing this topic out into the open because for anyone

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Speaker 1: in the audience who hasn't hit it yet, it's coming

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Speaker 1: for you and it's not all bad news. So I

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Speaker 1: wanted to start by asking our panel what did you

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Speaker 1: think menopause was before you experienced it, and looking back,

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Speaker 1: what was your first symptom or symptoms? Naomi, Yeah, menopause

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Speaker 1: to me was pretty much the signifier of the end

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Speaker 1: as I knew it.

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Speaker 3: I knew nothing. I did know that my mother went

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Speaker 3: into menopause, but no other information surrounding that. I didn't

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Speaker 3: know that she had a number of years leading up

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Speaker 3: to that point that she may or may not have suffered.

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Speaker 3: I didn't know that she possibly had a myriad of symptoms.

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Speaker 3: I didn't know that it occurred on a day, you know.

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Speaker 3: I just knew nothing, and what happened with me. My

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Speaker 3: symptoms mostly that occurred were around shame and fear and

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Speaker 3: anxiety because I happened to go to my doctor and say, look,

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Speaker 3: I'm not getting pregnant. Can you explain why I've spent

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Speaker 3: my whole life trying not to get pregnant and now

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Speaker 3: suddenly I want to get pregnant and it's not happening.

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Speaker 3: And so the doctor suggested that we take.

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Speaker 4: A blood panel.

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Speaker 3: I took the bloods and the blood suggested that I

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Speaker 3: was close to menopause, and so that's where the panic

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Speaker 3: came in.

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Speaker 1: I literally fought old with you.

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Speaker 3: I was thirty six, So that was the first uttering

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Speaker 3: of that comment being introduced to me. I went to

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Speaker 3: my mother and said, what the actual beep? Why didn't

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Speaker 3: you tell me more? And she said, well, these were

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Speaker 3: the conversations I never had with my mother because she

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Speaker 3: never had them with hers. And so the cycle went on,

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Speaker 3: and that just flawed me, like, how has that happened?

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Speaker 3: When we know that half the population will get there

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Speaker 3: at some point, as you said, how is that actually possible?

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Speaker 3: And we're living longer now as well? Where is the education?

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Speaker 3: Where is the conversation between friends, even sisters, family members?

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Speaker 1: Allison? Had you talked to anyone about minnopause or perimenopause

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Speaker 1: before it happened to you? How old were you I was?

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Speaker 5: I think I was about forty five forty six when

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Speaker 5: I got my first symptom, and that was just a

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Speaker 5: change in my cycle that was really radical. Might go

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Speaker 5: from two weeks to heavy bleeding to no bleeding. But

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Speaker 5: I hadn't even heard the word perimenopause. That was a

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Speaker 5: brand new word. I was like, what the hell is that?

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Speaker 5: And I thought menopause was just your period stopping. I

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Speaker 5: honestly thought that's all it was. And then to start

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Speaker 5: to do the research on it and look at we

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Speaker 5: were talking before fifty three symptoms and the amount of

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Speaker 5: effect that it has on women, the amount of effect

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Speaker 5: in the workplace, the relationships, the mental health. It was

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Speaker 5: so unbelievably shocking to me. It was like I'd lifted

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Speaker 5: up this carpet and there was all of this stuff

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Speaker 5: underneath it. People had just swept under and no one

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Speaker 5: had told me it.

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Speaker 4: Was all there.

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Speaker 5: So I was deeply shocked, and that was the reason

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Speaker 5: for writing the book and researching more about it, because

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Speaker 5: it was something that I had two older sisters, a

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Speaker 5: mom not a word, group of women not a word.

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Speaker 5: I was just left very alone in that as well,

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Speaker 5: and I think a lot of women feel that way

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Speaker 5: if they haven't been you know, explained symptoms and what

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Speaker 5: can go wrong and what can go right as well,

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Speaker 5: but a real sense of loneliness.

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Speaker 1: Ginny Australian women. I'm told love to say I'm going

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Speaker 1: to get my hormones checked because I think that's when

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Speaker 1: I noticed changes in my cycle. I also just assumed

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Speaker 1: that menopause was like a slow turning off of the tap.

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Speaker 1: In actual fact, my tap turned on, which I really

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Speaker 1: wasn't expecting. I'd always had pretty light periods and then

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Speaker 1: they were suddenly very very heavy. So, along with a

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Speaker 1: few other symptoms, I went to see my GP, and

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Speaker 1: I said, I want to get a blood test, assuming

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Speaker 1: that the blood test could tell me whether I was

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Speaker 1: in menopause. Perimenopause is this something that women do often?

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Speaker 1: And maybe you could explain why there is no blood

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Speaker 1: test and what menopause even actually is.

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Speaker 6: So a lot of people don't realize this. Menopause is

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Speaker 6: a single day. So it's a day that happens twelve

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Speaker 6: months to the day from the first day of your

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Speaker 6: last period. Only you didn't know it was your last

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Speaker 6: period because at that point they're all over the place.

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Speaker 6: You didn't know whether another one was coming in three

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Speaker 6: months or six months or two weeks for all you know.

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Speaker 6: So if you are, you know, switched on enough to remember,

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Speaker 6: that's your day of menopause. It's the rollercoaster leading up

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Speaker 6: to menopause that we call perimenopause.

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Speaker 1: That is the absolute car crash.

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Speaker 6: And there actually are two phases of perimenopause.

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Speaker 1: We're just skimmed right over that. I know there are

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Speaker 1: two phases.

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Speaker 6: The first one is when ovulation kind of goes and

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Speaker 6: you're not ovulating that much. If you don't ovulate, you

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Speaker 6: don't get a lot of progesterone see progesterine levels drop.

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Speaker 6: But at that point your brain is still trying to

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Speaker 6: kick your overariaes into gear and so it's putting out

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Speaker 6: heaps of stimulating hormone. So your estrogen is going up

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Speaker 6: and down like a yo yo. So I could do

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Speaker 6: a blood test for you at nine am Monday morning,

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Speaker 6: do the same blood test Tuesday afternoon, and the levels

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Speaker 6: will be completely different. So I've had lots of my

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Speaker 6: patients say I went to the doctor, they did a

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Speaker 6: blood test, I'm in menopause and I had my last

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Speaker 6: period two weeks ago. Okay, that doesn't make sense. You've

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Speaker 6: just all heard menopause means that it's been months since

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Speaker 6: the period and until that time. Unfortunately, the blood tests

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Speaker 6: are completely useless.

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Speaker 1: But we also know that your.

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Speaker 6: Blood levels of hormones correlate very poorly with your symptoms,

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Speaker 6: so it's a really unhelpful test. We know that individual women,

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Speaker 6: I see maybe ten new patients a day with pery

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Speaker 6: and menopause symptoms, I have never met to the same.

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Speaker 1: Everybody is different.

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Speaker 6: That makes it really difficult to manage because getting support

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Speaker 6: from your friends can be really difficult. But at the

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Speaker 6: same time, the hormone tests don't bother. It's really a

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Speaker 6: waste of time.

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Speaker 1: Can you explain to everyone what estrogen is responsible for

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Speaker 1: in the body? That is, you know, how long is

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Speaker 1: a piece of string in every single organ of your body,

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Speaker 1: from your heart to every joint to your skin, to

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Speaker 1: every bit of collagen in your joints, in your bones,

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Speaker 1: in your muscles, through to your brain.

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Speaker 6: Unbelievable numbers of estrogen receptors in your brain, in your guts,

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Speaker 6: in your lungs. Receptors are everywhere, and they do different

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Speaker 6: things in different body parts. And that's why when I

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Speaker 6: started specializing in menopause, I think we had seven symptoms

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Speaker 6: of menopause. We just cracked fifty three because we just

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Speaker 6: added chronic cough to the mix, which is a brand

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Speaker 6: new one. Welcome to the club, chronic cough. That feels

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Speaker 6: unfair here, thanks for that. But literally, there are very

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Speaker 6: few body parts that are unaffected by the loss of estrogen.

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Speaker 1: Some of the more physical symptoms like hot flushes, insomnia,

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Speaker 1: those kinds of things a fairly well known, you know,

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Speaker 1: cycle irregularity. I think what was a shock to me

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Speaker 1: and a lot of women is the emotional changes. Alie.

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Speaker 1: Can I ask you what was your emotional and mental state,

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Speaker 1: like when you were going through Perry.

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Speaker 5: Well, that for me was you know, if someone asked

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Speaker 5: me what was the hardest part of perimenopause, it was

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Speaker 5: absolutely the emotional toll that it took on me. And

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Speaker 5: I always thought of myself as a fairly optimistic person,

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Speaker 5: but I became severely anxious. I became depressed. There were

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Speaker 5: days I did not want to get out of bed.

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Speaker 5: There were days that I thought it'd be better off

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Speaker 5: if I wasn't around. I take too much of a

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Speaker 5: toll on my family. I couldn't see that I was

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Speaker 5: ever going to come out of that state. And it

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Speaker 5: was a weird experience at the same time, because there

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Speaker 5: was another part of me kind of looking down, going

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Speaker 5: where are you going with this?

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Speaker 4: Like what is happening right now?

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Speaker 5: I got myself to a therapist at that point because

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Speaker 5: I'd never had those kind of thoughts ever, and there

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Speaker 5: was no reason for it, you know, it was just

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Speaker 5: my hormones just but that was by far the hardest

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Speaker 5: part for me. Naomi, what about you, Yeah, I think

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Speaker 5: so this timing of the pregnancy thing, like I was

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Speaker 5: all motivated to just have my children. I thought, how

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Speaker 5: do I figure this out with my doctor, and my doctor,

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Speaker 5: mercifully was very pro hormones and all of at and

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Speaker 5: despite the fear that was surrounding the two HRT two

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Speaker 5: sorry yeah, sorry, HRT hormone replacement therapy. Firstly, I'll say

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Speaker 5: I had two children naturally. I tried things.

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Speaker 3: I wasn't a candidate for IVF, inseminations weren't working for me,

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Speaker 3: cloonate nothing, so I did natural interventions. Mercifully, I was

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Speaker 3: able to get pregnant. As soon as I had my

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Speaker 3: second child. I basically went into hardcore symptoms, and like

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Speaker 3: you said, perimenopause was not a word that I knew

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Speaker 3: of or my doctors were using. I then went into

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Speaker 3: the shame part again. I went into oh my god,

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Speaker 3: I'm finished. I'm no longer sexy. I work in Hollywood,

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Speaker 3: you know, and if you're not fertile, you're unfuckable.

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Speaker 4: And I'd actually heard.

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Speaker 3: That term from an agent from long ago. You better

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Speaker 3: get going, you better put your pedal to the metal. Work,

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Speaker 3: work work, because you've only gotten till you're forty. And

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Speaker 3: I said, what is that why? And he goes, well,

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Speaker 3: you know, you become unfuckable and you can't play a

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Speaker 3: leading lady.

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Speaker 1: So that was just shocking to be so for you.

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Speaker 1: It had career implications for sure.

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Speaker 3: So the shame and the panic and the loneliness. But

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Speaker 3: as I said, my doctor was well educated and walked

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Speaker 3: me through it. I trusted my doctor, so the symptoms

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Speaker 3: that I had were dealt with pretty quickly. I've been

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Speaker 3: on HRT for a lot of years now. I'm a

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Speaker 3: big advocate of it because it's all a cycle. I

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Speaker 3: couldn't sleep, You then get brain fog, you then get depression,

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Speaker 3: You then get all kinds of things, so you're on

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Speaker 3: a cycle of going nowhere fast?

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Speaker 1: Did anyone else have rage? Just me? Then rage and weepage? No?

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Speaker 4: No, no, I'm with you.

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Speaker 6: So we know that one in three women will get

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Speaker 6: anxiety and all depression around this time, and what a

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Speaker 6: lot of us never talk about. And in this country

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Speaker 6: we rightly acknowledge perinatal and postnatal depression, anxiety, and it's

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Speaker 6: really well funded, which is great, But the peak period

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Speaker 6: of vulnerability in a woman's life is actually around perimenopause

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Speaker 6: and the early postmenopausal years. It's actually the peak time

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Speaker 6: for suicide as well, So we need to be talking

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Speaker 6: about this yet and divorce and career ending moves, you know.

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Speaker 6: And you've got to think about the women in the

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Speaker 6: workplace who are looking at that fifty year old woman going,

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Speaker 6: oh my god, I did not want to be that,

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Speaker 6: and they're going to exit because they just look at

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Speaker 6: her with her rage and she's pissed off at everybody

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Speaker 6: and pissed off with her kids, hates a partner.

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Speaker 1: You know.

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Speaker 6: It's not a great inspiring figure out there. And we

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Speaker 6: know that the main symptoms because it does look a

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Speaker 6: bit different, the anxiety and depression, and it often hits

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Speaker 6: people who've never had a mental health issue ever in

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Speaker 6: their life. But what we know is the rage is

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Speaker 6: a big one, you know, that just pissed off with everybody,

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Speaker 6: the weepiness, extreme anxiety, These are the sorts of things

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Speaker 6: that happen that are quite different. And you can tell

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Speaker 6: that it's hormonal, and we treat it differently because it

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Speaker 6: is hormonal.

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Speaker 1: And then throw in some teenagers.

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Speaker 4: Just to top it off.

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Speaker 6: Doesn't Mother nature give us teenagers at the worst time

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Speaker 6: of our lives and elderly parents as well, because we're

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Speaker 6: all like, you know, you've got to take mum to

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Speaker 6: the doctor. And then take the kid to another call

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Speaker 6: from the principle again.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I wanted to ask about identity because it does

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Speaker 1: happen at a time when you are aware that you're

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Speaker 1: becoming invisible in society, when our culture is telling women

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Speaker 1: to get in the bin because we are no longer fertile,

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Speaker 1: we are no longer in our early twenties, and we

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Speaker 1: live in a very youth obsessed culture. Allison, you are

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Speaker 1: a model. You literally earned a living from the way

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Speaker 1: you looked. What kind of reckoning was this time for

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Speaker 1: you in terms of identity and self image?

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Speaker 5: I mean I was lucky in the sense that I'd

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Speaker 5: left the modeling industry and was doing other work that

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Speaker 5: was more well, it wasn't based on my looks, so

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Speaker 5: that actually helped me going into perimenopause. But at the

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Speaker 5: same time, I had moved back from America, so I

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Speaker 5: was in Australia when all the perimenopause and menopausal stuff hit.

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Speaker 5: So I was very much recognized as that old Dolly girl,

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Speaker 5: Cosmo girl model. So it was really interesting for a while.

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Speaker 5: Like you, Naomi, I felt really embarrassed and ashamed about

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Speaker 5: how I'd aged and thinking like I'd let people down somehow,

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Speaker 5: and I.

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Speaker 1: Felt very let down by you.

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Speaker 4: I know, I remember you mentioned that to me.

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Speaker 1: I'm so disappointed in you. My god, how.

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Speaker 4: Dare you age? I've moved through that.

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Speaker 5: I thought there's no way I can stay in that

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Speaker 5: space and it's just not a good place to stay in.

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Speaker 5: So we will get to the plus sides of metopause eventually,

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Speaker 5: but you know, I had to really sort of dig

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Speaker 5: deep into myself in a way and go, well, who

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Speaker 5: am I? It really made me look at myself as

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Speaker 5: a woman menopause and just go, Okay, who am I?

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Speaker 5: Who do I want to be? And really, it's not

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Speaker 5: about how I look. It's got to be how I feel.

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Speaker 5: It's got to be how I feel. And I would

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Speaker 5: say that over and over again, and how do I

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Speaker 5: get myself feeling good again? So that's where I took

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Speaker 5: it for me, because you know, I went from a

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Speaker 5: size six to a size fourteen, and I was like,

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Speaker 5: oh god, you know, but I was like, Okay, I'm

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Speaker 5: just gonna own it. I'm just gonna lap it all

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Speaker 5: up and this is just who I am, and it's okay.

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Speaker 4: Sigh, sixteen fourteen. It's great. As long as I feel good,

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Speaker 4: and that was my goal.

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Speaker 1: Ginny, Allie and I were all with our partners pre

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Speaker 1: and during and so far post Harry, I'm not there yet,

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Speaker 1: oh okay, which was challenging in many ways. Naomi, you

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Speaker 1: were dating at that time or with new partner, What

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Speaker 1: was that like to navigate? Because this was not someone

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Speaker 1: who'd seen you give birth and you know, had gone

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Speaker 1: through all of those things with you, and you talked

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Speaker 1: about feeling, oh, you've got to be young and hot,

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Speaker 1: and what was that like?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and I'll go carefully here to protect the privacy

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Speaker 3: of my relationship, but I will say it was a

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Speaker 3: very awkward time because of the points you just made.

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Speaker 3: I didn't know how squeamish he would be, and like,

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Speaker 3: you know, the idea of exposing such personal things so

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Speaker 3: that I knew I felt ashamed of how would he feel? Ultimately,

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Speaker 3: keeping secrets is too exhausting.

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Speaker 1: And it's hard to hide a patch when you're in

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Speaker 1: had to hide a patch.

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Speaker 4: It's hard to hide the moods.

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Speaker 3: It's hard to you know, just show up in the

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Speaker 3: ways that you may have in your twenties and thirties.

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Speaker 3: And so ultimately I made the decision. I thought, well,

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Speaker 3: this is a great litmus test. Let me see how

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Speaker 3: it lands with this. And I just got really honest

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Speaker 3: with him, and he was like, oh wow, cool, just

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Speaker 3: tell me how I can help. What do I do?

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Speaker 3: And empathy straight away, and you know, a few jokes

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Speaker 3: to follow as well. But yes, we instantly he knew

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Speaker 3: how to behave, he knew how to be gentle and

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Speaker 3: show up and obviously he passed the litmus test.

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Speaker 1: And now we're married, and I've seen the way he

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Speaker 1: looks at you, and everyone should have someone that looks

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Speaker 1: at them like he looks at you. So it clearly

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Speaker 1: was not an impediment to your relationship.

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Speaker 3: Just to add to that, I would say anyone who's

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Speaker 3: going through that, because it is common. Marriages do break down,

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Speaker 3: marriages will change, and people are meeting their second partners,

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Speaker 3: and I think communication is absolutely key and it's the

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Speaker 3: only way to educate. It's not a failing. It was

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Speaker 3: always supposed to be part of what would happen with

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00:20:06,285 --> 00:20:09,765
Speaker 3: your hormonal cycle. And leaning into it, like you said,

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Speaker 3: and owning it is just the only way.

364
00:20:12,965 --> 00:20:13,685
Speaker 4: To deal with it.

365
00:20:14,125 --> 00:20:16,805
Speaker 3: And the more people understand it, the more we normalize

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Speaker 3: and open this conversation just get used to it the better.

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Speaker 1: And I also think talking to our kids. I mean,

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Speaker 1: you know, gen X, we do like to talk. So

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Speaker 1: my kids. I remember one poor one of them one

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Speaker 1: night just said, I'm just wondering how long actually does

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Speaker 1: perimenopause last. I got very angry. But they know a

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Speaker 1: lot about it. You know, my teenagers and my oldest son,

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Speaker 1: they know a lot about it. So that will be

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Speaker 1: good for both the boys and the girls of the

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Speaker 1: next generation. Giny, I want to ask about HRT before

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Speaker 1: we move on, because when a lot of women go

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Speaker 1: to their GP, something I didn't realize when I first

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Speaker 1: heard the idea of HIT, I was like, oh, no,

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Speaker 1: that'll give me cancer. Why was that in my head?

380
00:20:58,085 --> 00:21:00,965
Speaker 1: And why do so many gps give such bad advice

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Speaker 1: about HRT and menopause.

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Speaker 6: So I'm going to do a really quick reader's digest

383
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Speaker 6: I know I'm a boomer, a reader's digest version of

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Speaker 6: what happened and to make HRT get linked to cancer

385
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Speaker 6: and why so many women are terrified of taking it today.

386
00:21:16,445 --> 00:21:20,325
Speaker 6: So back in the nineteen nineties, a lot of American studies,

387
00:21:20,445 --> 00:21:23,645
Speaker 6: which were population studies, you took entire groups of people

388
00:21:24,085 --> 00:21:26,525
Speaker 6: they had found that in fact, women who were taking

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Speaker 6: hormone replacement therapy. Back in those days, it was synthetic

390
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Speaker 6: hormone replacement therapy. We don't tend to use that very

391
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Speaker 6: much anymore. But those people who were on that HRT

392
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Speaker 6: actually had less heart disease. So the National Institutes of

393
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Speaker 6: Health from America said, hey, let's do a massive study

394
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Speaker 6: one hundred and ten thousand women. Let's get them older women,

395
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Speaker 6: average age sixty three when we start this trial, well

396
00:21:51,005 --> 00:21:54,885
Speaker 6: passed when you need your HRT for menopause symptoms. Let's

397
00:21:54,885 --> 00:21:58,085
Speaker 6: do a study where we give half HRT and half

398
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Speaker 6: placebo and see what happens whether it prevents heart disease.

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Speaker 6: Spoiler alert, it doesn't. Doesn't prevent heart disease, particularly in

400
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Speaker 6: those older women. But what they found back in two

401
00:22:08,725 --> 00:22:11,485
Speaker 6: thousand and two, who was that for every ten thousand

402
00:22:11,485 --> 00:22:14,685
Speaker 6: women who were taking a placebo, they had thirty cases

403
00:22:14,685 --> 00:22:18,445
Speaker 6: of breast cancer. For every ten thousand women taking the HRT,

404
00:22:18,565 --> 00:22:21,445
Speaker 6: the synthetic HRT that we don't really use anymore, there

405
00:22:21,485 --> 00:22:24,405
Speaker 6: were thirty eight cases of breast cancer. Now, as a

406
00:22:24,445 --> 00:22:27,365
Speaker 6: result of that, plus the futility, it did not prevent

407
00:22:27,445 --> 00:22:31,485
Speaker 6: heart disease. They actually canned the study. But the problem

408
00:22:31,605 --> 00:22:34,285
Speaker 6: was they went to the press and the subtleties of

409
00:22:34,325 --> 00:22:38,645
Speaker 6: that messaging, all anybody heard was HRT causes breast cancer.

410
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Speaker 6: Now what in fact, if you took the group of

411
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Speaker 6: women inside that study who were in their early fifties

412
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Speaker 6: when they were given the HRT, they didn't get any

413
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Speaker 6: extra breast cancer. And what it looks like is for

414
00:22:49,485 --> 00:22:52,925
Speaker 6: body identical HRT very different to bioidentical. We can talk

415
00:22:52,965 --> 00:22:55,925
Speaker 6: about that, but body identical HRT doesn't seem to have

416
00:22:55,925 --> 00:22:59,205
Speaker 6: any increased risk of breast cancer, particularly when it's given

417
00:22:59,485 --> 00:23:01,965
Speaker 6: to young women and particularly if you don't stay on

418
00:23:02,005 --> 00:23:06,285
Speaker 6: it forever. And definitely every menopause society in the world

419
00:23:06,365 --> 00:23:09,005
Speaker 6: today will say that the benefits of HRT for most

420
00:23:09,045 --> 00:23:11,645
Speaker 6: women will weigh out weigh the risks. We don't give

421
00:23:11,685 --> 00:23:15,005
Speaker 6: it to everybody, but just if you have symptoms, the

422
00:23:15,125 --> 00:23:18,485
Speaker 6: benefits will outweigh the risks. But what happened after that

423
00:23:18,525 --> 00:23:20,525
Speaker 6: two thousand and two study was shut down and what

424
00:23:20,605 --> 00:23:23,365
Speaker 6: was called the Women's Health Initiative Study was there were

425
00:23:23,965 --> 00:23:27,205
Speaker 6: hundreds of lawsuits, particularly in America, the lawsuit capital of

426
00:23:27,205 --> 00:23:30,005
Speaker 6: the world, and in fact the drug company that made

427
00:23:30,005 --> 00:23:32,325
Speaker 6: that form of HRT that was used in that trial

428
00:23:32,405 --> 00:23:35,485
Speaker 6: went bankrupt and was sold off, and the parent company

429
00:23:35,485 --> 00:23:37,525
Speaker 6: that ended up buying it had to settle three hundred

430
00:23:37,525 --> 00:23:40,325
Speaker 6: and fifty million US dollars worth of lawsuits for women

431
00:23:40,365 --> 00:23:43,805
Speaker 6: who had breast cancer. And every drug company in the

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00:23:43,845 --> 00:23:47,245
Speaker 6: world said, too hard. They rolled down the shutters on

433
00:23:47,325 --> 00:23:50,405
Speaker 6: all of their women's health division, particularly for midlife women.

434
00:23:50,885 --> 00:23:54,205
Speaker 6: They stopped doing research, they stopped teaching at university. I

435
00:23:54,245 --> 00:23:57,125
Speaker 6: myself got zero training. I didn't even get an hour

436
00:23:57,205 --> 00:24:01,045
Speaker 6: of training on menopause through my whole journey into general practice,

437
00:24:01,485 --> 00:24:04,805
Speaker 6: and most doctors to this day know nothing about the

438
00:24:04,885 --> 00:24:08,325
Speaker 6: management of menopause. Now that's going to impact all of you,

439
00:24:08,405 --> 00:24:10,605
Speaker 6: because I see page every day who've gone to their

440
00:24:10,645 --> 00:24:12,725
Speaker 6: GP and said I'd like to go on hormone replacement

441
00:24:12,765 --> 00:24:15,885
Speaker 6: therapy and the GP says, that's dangerous. I'm not giving

442
00:24:15,925 --> 00:24:18,565
Speaker 6: it to you. Your mother had breast cancer, you can't

443
00:24:18,605 --> 00:24:20,725
Speaker 6: have it. No, that's definitely not the case.

444
00:24:21,125 --> 00:24:24,885
Speaker 1: But there is this fear that has pervaded all of the.

445
00:24:24,845 --> 00:24:28,485
Speaker 6: Women, and to this day, to my horror, there are

446
00:24:28,565 --> 00:24:33,205
Speaker 6: still black box warnings on every form of HRT that most.

447
00:24:33,005 --> 00:24:34,605
Speaker 1: Of us here what to back box warning.

448
00:24:34,845 --> 00:24:37,885
Speaker 6: So that's a mandatory government led warning that says this

449
00:24:37,885 --> 00:24:40,045
Speaker 6: thing can give you breast cancer. I mean you, and

450
00:24:40,045 --> 00:24:41,965
Speaker 6: I will chuck out the packet inserts and.

451
00:24:41,925 --> 00:24:45,645
Speaker 1: Just say, don't that on my packet. I ignore it.

452
00:24:45,005 --> 00:24:46,805
Speaker 1: But they are there.

453
00:24:47,445 --> 00:24:49,645
Speaker 6: Those warnings are there, and for women who take their

454
00:24:49,645 --> 00:24:52,925
Speaker 6: hell seriously and actually read the packet inserts, that's terrify.

455
00:24:53,125 --> 00:24:55,405
Speaker 1: Before we move on to identity, and I'm going to

456
00:24:55,405 --> 00:24:57,725
Speaker 1: ask about this reinvention stage of life, which is one

457
00:24:57,765 --> 00:24:59,645
Speaker 1: of the most positive things that come with being this

458
00:24:59,765 --> 00:25:03,365
Speaker 1: age and going through this What should someone do, Like,

459
00:25:03,445 --> 00:25:06,125
Speaker 1: if there is so much misinformation out there, what do

460
00:25:06,165 --> 00:25:08,365
Speaker 1: you do? What's the first port of call?

461
00:25:08,485 --> 00:25:10,925
Speaker 6: So I think, as I said, there are no two

462
00:25:11,005 --> 00:25:13,405
Speaker 6: women who are the same, and even getting the right

463
00:25:13,565 --> 00:25:16,125
Speaker 6: HRT formulation, it can take a lot of kissing a

464
00:25:16,125 --> 00:25:18,445
Speaker 6: lot of frogs to get your handsome prints and get

465
00:25:18,445 --> 00:25:20,885
Speaker 6: you to the place where you feel right. And you

466
00:25:21,005 --> 00:25:23,005
Speaker 6: need to work with a doctor who will listen to you.

467
00:25:23,245 --> 00:25:27,005
Speaker 6: Not everybody needs or wants HRT, and there are other

468
00:25:27,045 --> 00:25:30,165
Speaker 6: options out there. It's not the only thing. The problem

469
00:25:30,245 --> 00:25:32,725
Speaker 6: is with that fifty three symptoms that we talked about.

470
00:25:33,165 --> 00:25:35,765
Speaker 6: To get all of them wrapped, up in a single treatment.

471
00:25:35,765 --> 00:25:38,605
Speaker 6: Whether it's your joint pain or your mental health concerns,

472
00:25:38,645 --> 00:25:41,405
Speaker 6: or your insomnia and your hot flushes and your itchy

473
00:25:41,445 --> 00:25:45,045
Speaker 6: skin and your palpitations, there is only one treatment that

474
00:25:45,085 --> 00:25:47,005
Speaker 6: will get rid of all of it and strengthen your

475
00:25:47,045 --> 00:25:50,125
Speaker 6: bones and reduce your risk of bowel cancer. So yet

476
00:25:50,245 --> 00:25:52,885
Speaker 6: that's just get armed with the fact and find a

477
00:25:52,925 --> 00:25:54,085
Speaker 6: doctor who will listen to you.

478
00:25:56,005 --> 00:25:58,045
Speaker 1: Up next, we talked about a lot of things that

479
00:25:58,205 --> 00:26:00,685
Speaker 1: kiss us off, as you just heard, but there are

480
00:26:00,765 --> 00:26:03,845
Speaker 1: actually a lot of positives to going through this phase

481
00:26:03,925 --> 00:26:06,645
Speaker 1: of life. Stay with us because we're going to talk

482
00:26:06,685 --> 00:26:14,605
Speaker 1: about those. I would like to talk about the freeing

483
00:26:15,005 --> 00:26:18,565
Speaker 1: nature of what can happen in this life stage because

484
00:26:18,605 --> 00:26:20,925
Speaker 1: we've talked and been honest about some of the more

485
00:26:20,965 --> 00:26:24,565
Speaker 1: negative things, and hopefully there are more women won't go

486
00:26:24,645 --> 00:26:26,725
Speaker 1: through it because there are more women speaking out now.

487
00:26:26,805 --> 00:26:28,965
Speaker 4: But you decided to start.

488
00:26:28,765 --> 00:26:31,285
Speaker 1: A business at this life stage. You know, there are

489
00:26:31,285 --> 00:26:35,405
Speaker 1: a lot of actors and celebrities who are doing skincare

490
00:26:35,445 --> 00:26:38,565
Speaker 1: and doing makeup. Starting a line of menopause products is

491
00:26:38,605 --> 00:26:42,405
Speaker 1: not the most sexiest choice you could have made. Why

492
00:26:42,445 --> 00:26:45,005
Speaker 1: did you choose? You know, with the launch of Stripes

493
00:26:45,125 --> 00:26:45,805
Speaker 1: to do this.

494
00:26:46,485 --> 00:26:49,485
Speaker 3: I think given that I had been living with the

495
00:26:49,605 --> 00:26:53,925
Speaker 3: secret for so long and feeling that shame and not

496
00:26:53,965 --> 00:26:56,965
Speaker 3: being able to discuss it even amongst my friends. I

497
00:26:57,085 --> 00:26:59,885
Speaker 3: did sort of crack jokes with my friends about having

498
00:26:59,925 --> 00:27:02,325
Speaker 3: an estrogen dep and it was always met with a

499
00:27:02,365 --> 00:27:05,445
Speaker 3: nervous laugh, you know. So I was like, Okay, that

500
00:27:05,605 --> 00:27:08,285
Speaker 3: was a feeler check. No one else is in menopause

501
00:27:08,325 --> 00:27:12,005
Speaker 3: around me, so I'll keep quiet. And I think after

502
00:27:12,045 --> 00:27:14,685
Speaker 3: a certain number of years, you just get bored of that.

503
00:27:15,045 --> 00:27:18,125
Speaker 3: And then I started to really just become my own

504
00:27:18,165 --> 00:27:21,845
Speaker 3: advocate of how to piece meal all the information. And

505
00:27:21,925 --> 00:27:25,965
Speaker 3: luckily the Internet was quite active by the fourth or

506
00:27:25,965 --> 00:27:29,285
Speaker 3: fifth year of these symptoms, and so I was finding

507
00:27:29,885 --> 00:27:33,805
Speaker 3: more and more information and going to different doctors. And

508
00:27:33,925 --> 00:27:36,285
Speaker 3: like you say, if your doctor is not going to

509
00:27:36,645 --> 00:27:39,365
Speaker 3: give you or hear you in the right way, then

510
00:27:39,405 --> 00:27:42,725
Speaker 3: you really should just change your doctor. I'm to this

511
00:27:42,885 --> 00:27:46,725
Speaker 3: day still learning more and I am deep, deep, deep

512
00:27:46,885 --> 00:27:51,245
Speaker 3: into the research now having started the company. I mean, well,

513
00:27:51,245 --> 00:27:54,125
Speaker 3: it's been percolating for three years now, but it's been

514
00:27:54,165 --> 00:27:56,805
Speaker 3: on the shelves for a year in the US. I

515
00:27:56,925 --> 00:28:00,085
Speaker 3: decided that I had to do it. I couldn't not

516
00:28:00,405 --> 00:28:04,245
Speaker 3: do it because I needed a place to go. There

517
00:28:04,365 --> 00:28:07,365
Speaker 3: was nowhere to go. There was no conversation. So I thought,

518
00:28:07,405 --> 00:28:10,005
Speaker 3: what if there was a place to go for others,

519
00:28:10,045 --> 00:28:13,405
Speaker 3: because no one should have to walk through this alone.

520
00:28:13,605 --> 00:28:15,965
Speaker 3: I had already spent a lot of time with skincare

521
00:28:16,045 --> 00:28:19,525
Speaker 3: because I had become a co founder of a company

522
00:28:19,645 --> 00:28:23,685
Speaker 3: called Onder Beauty, which was because I was having dry,

523
00:28:23,805 --> 00:28:27,325
Speaker 3: itchy skin, raging skin. And I'm an actor and I

524
00:28:27,405 --> 00:28:30,325
Speaker 3: work on screen and have topply makeup all day long,

525
00:28:31,045 --> 00:28:34,245
Speaker 3: and my skin was just yelling and screaming at me.

526
00:28:34,845 --> 00:28:37,405
Speaker 3: So I had to sort of look into the ingredients

527
00:28:37,445 --> 00:28:41,205
Speaker 3: that I was using that worked perfectly well for many years.

528
00:28:41,285 --> 00:28:43,245
Speaker 3: I had to make adjustments there and I had to

529
00:28:43,765 --> 00:28:46,565
Speaker 3: use gentler or ingredients. So I became passionate and well

530
00:28:46,645 --> 00:28:49,845
Speaker 3: versed in ingredients. But then I started looking at all

531
00:28:49,885 --> 00:28:52,245
Speaker 3: of these brands, and I'm talking like between seventy and

532
00:28:52,285 --> 00:28:55,445
Speaker 3: eighty different brands, and I saw, yeah, that was good

533
00:28:55,445 --> 00:28:58,245
Speaker 3: for this thing, and that was good for maybe my hair,

534
00:28:58,325 --> 00:29:00,645
Speaker 3: and this was good for my body, and you know,

535
00:29:00,725 --> 00:29:04,165
Speaker 3: but I don't like how they're speaking to me, you know,

536
00:29:04,325 --> 00:29:07,805
Speaker 3: promising the world of this and throwing as a twenty

537
00:29:07,845 --> 00:29:10,605
Speaker 3: eight year old up there to sell the product, and

538
00:29:11,005 --> 00:29:15,485
Speaker 3: that doesn't feel good. I want to feel authenticity. I'm

539
00:29:15,525 --> 00:29:17,205
Speaker 3: not going to suffer fools. I'm not going to be

540
00:29:17,205 --> 00:29:20,805
Speaker 3: fed a whole bunch of nonsense. So it really became

541
00:29:20,845 --> 00:29:23,805
Speaker 3: clear to me that a brand was needed to address

542
00:29:23,845 --> 00:29:26,165
Speaker 3: all of the pain points, or as many as possible.

543
00:29:26,245 --> 00:29:28,485
Speaker 3: We don't have estrogen, and by the way, the fear

544
00:29:28,525 --> 00:29:30,965
Speaker 3: that you speak of literally women have come up to

545
00:29:31,005 --> 00:29:33,525
Speaker 3: men said, is that estrogen in there? Because I can't

546
00:29:33,565 --> 00:29:37,005
Speaker 3: take it? You know, Like, no, we don't have hormones

547
00:29:37,005 --> 00:29:41,165
Speaker 3: in our products. But we have powerful active ingredients that

548
00:29:41,405 --> 00:29:46,365
Speaker 3: have real good ways of hydrating, and ectoin and squalene,

549
00:29:46,405 --> 00:29:49,885
Speaker 3: which is a paired combination of locking in the moisture

550
00:29:50,205 --> 00:29:53,925
Speaker 3: and ectoin is an unbelievable smart ingredient that knows how

551
00:29:53,925 --> 00:29:57,245
Speaker 3: to identify where water is needed and it can collect

552
00:29:57,325 --> 00:30:00,285
Speaker 3: and multiply the water and lock it in. So the

553
00:30:00,365 --> 00:30:02,845
Speaker 3: two things are in all of our products. I've got

554
00:30:02,845 --> 00:30:03,405
Speaker 3: five here.

555
00:30:03,885 --> 00:30:06,965
Speaker 1: This is Vadge of Honor. Yeah, can we talk about

556
00:30:07,005 --> 00:30:10,245
Speaker 1: badges because I know everyone's been so excited to talk

557
00:30:10,285 --> 00:30:15,405
Speaker 1: about badges. The Vadge moisturizer ile in the in the chemist.

558
00:30:16,165 --> 00:30:19,045
Speaker 1: It's just not it's not one that you will find easily,

559
00:30:19,965 --> 00:30:22,205
Speaker 1: and it's not one that you will probably be comfortable

560
00:30:22,245 --> 00:30:26,045
Speaker 1: asking the very young, usually males, sales assistant to help

561
00:30:26,085 --> 00:30:26,565
Speaker 1: you find.

562
00:30:27,245 --> 00:30:29,405
Speaker 3: And it's not one you want to bump into anyone else.

563
00:30:29,405 --> 00:30:32,365
Speaker 1: No, you don't want to pause too long there, and

564
00:30:32,405 --> 00:30:34,165
Speaker 1: because of all the shame. You know, there's a lot

565
00:30:34,165 --> 00:30:37,165
Speaker 1: of things to It's not just about your top, it's

566
00:30:37,285 --> 00:30:40,245
Speaker 1: also about the bottom areas. I love that you've got

567
00:30:40,245 --> 00:30:42,245
Speaker 1: two Vadge products. Yeah, what do they do?

568
00:30:42,725 --> 00:30:45,245
Speaker 3: There's a lube as well, which is somewhere else. What's

569
00:30:45,245 --> 00:30:48,005
Speaker 3: it called play oil oil? And it's called oh my

570
00:30:48,165 --> 00:30:50,165
Speaker 3: glide and my Glide.

571
00:30:50,245 --> 00:30:50,485
Speaker 4: Yeah.

572
00:30:50,525 --> 00:30:53,285
Speaker 3: We've tried to have fun with the names because I

573
00:30:53,325 --> 00:30:56,085
Speaker 3: love that you've heard us bitch and moan here and

574
00:30:56,205 --> 00:30:58,485
Speaker 3: about all of the negatives. And they look they will

575
00:30:58,485 --> 00:31:01,285
Speaker 3: look nice next to your bed or in your bedside table. Yes,

576
00:31:01,325 --> 00:31:04,565
Speaker 3: that's not something that you have to necessarily hide. I

577
00:31:04,685 --> 00:31:07,285
Speaker 3: wanted to have fun with the names and the color

578
00:31:07,365 --> 00:31:11,925
Speaker 3: palette and feel like this is actually a vibrant time

579
00:31:11,965 --> 00:31:14,605
Speaker 3: in our lives. Look at all of you women here,

580
00:31:14,725 --> 00:31:18,725
Speaker 3: You're all doing fantastic things. It's not the end. There's

581
00:31:18,805 --> 00:31:21,565
Speaker 3: so much life to live. We know we're living longer now,

582
00:31:21,925 --> 00:31:25,165
Speaker 3: and shifting the narrative was the most important thing for me.

583
00:31:25,565 --> 00:31:28,605
Speaker 3: Do not hide in shame and secrecy, come out and

584
00:31:28,725 --> 00:31:31,845
Speaker 3: own it, and set yourself up better for the last

585
00:31:31,845 --> 00:31:34,605
Speaker 3: part of your life, which is possibly a third even

586
00:31:34,645 --> 00:31:37,485
Speaker 3: a half of your life. I've got two grandma's guys

587
00:31:37,885 --> 00:31:40,885
Speaker 3: who are still living. One's one hundred and one's ninety eight.

588
00:31:41,445 --> 00:31:44,365
Speaker 1: Alie, I wanted to ask you about you know, you

589
00:31:44,445 --> 00:31:47,765
Speaker 1: spoke really movingly and thank you for sharing that about

590
00:31:47,805 --> 00:31:52,325
Speaker 1: your rock bottom essentially. But then when we were talking

591
00:31:52,365 --> 00:31:56,085
Speaker 1: in the green room about what happened after that and

592
00:31:56,525 --> 00:31:59,645
Speaker 1: what benefits this life stage is brought to you, can

593
00:31:59,685 --> 00:32:00,605
Speaker 1: you speak a bit about that?

594
00:32:01,325 --> 00:32:05,245
Speaker 5: Yeah, Well, I think, like anything in life sometimes is

595
00:32:05,285 --> 00:32:08,685
Speaker 5: sort of like what can menopause like do for you?

596
00:32:09,365 --> 00:32:11,645
Speaker 5: And that was my as I said, that was my

597
00:32:11,725 --> 00:32:13,845
Speaker 5: goal was sort of like I knew I needed to

598
00:32:13,885 --> 00:32:16,285
Speaker 5: move out of this depressed state. I knew I needed

599
00:32:16,325 --> 00:32:20,285
Speaker 5: to help my body, and in doing that, there was

600
00:32:20,405 --> 00:32:21,125
Speaker 5: so much that.

601
00:32:21,165 --> 00:32:22,565
Speaker 4: Happened during that time.

602
00:32:22,725 --> 00:32:26,365
Speaker 5: I can honestly say I'm so grateful I've went through

603
00:32:26,405 --> 00:32:29,965
Speaker 5: perimenopause and menopause, and I feel like it's something that

604
00:32:30,845 --> 00:32:34,045
Speaker 5: it can feel like a doom and gloom thing on

605
00:32:34,085 --> 00:32:38,365
Speaker 5: your horizon, but there's like an allocating of your tools

606
00:32:38,365 --> 00:32:40,605
Speaker 5: that start to happen as well. That's what I found.

607
00:32:40,765 --> 00:32:44,045
Speaker 5: Like I'd always been this outgoing give a give a

608
00:32:44,085 --> 00:32:47,205
Speaker 5: giver who needs this? That who needs this? And I

609
00:32:47,325 --> 00:32:50,965
Speaker 5: was bottom of the list constantly, And when perimenopause and

610
00:32:51,005 --> 00:32:54,565
Speaker 5: menopause hit, all of a sudden, I became top of

611
00:32:54,565 --> 00:32:57,325
Speaker 5: the list. And I loved being top of the list.

612
00:32:57,885 --> 00:33:00,005
Speaker 5: I was co top. I didn't sort of move anyone

613
00:33:00,005 --> 00:33:02,285
Speaker 5: else further down. But but why.

614
00:33:02,285 --> 00:33:04,485
Speaker 1: Like what changed? What took you to the top of

615
00:33:04,485 --> 00:33:06,725
Speaker 1: the list? Just because you were so unpleasant to be around?

616
00:33:06,725 --> 00:33:09,565
Speaker 1: Everyone else went away? That's what happened to me.

617
00:33:09,765 --> 00:33:13,005
Speaker 5: It was just those things of going what do I need?

618
00:33:13,245 --> 00:33:16,005
Speaker 5: Just it was that simple question what do I actually need?

619
00:33:16,125 --> 00:33:18,605
Speaker 5: Because I'd felt so crap and I was like, what

620
00:33:18,645 --> 00:33:21,125
Speaker 5: do I need to make myself feel better? I need

621
00:33:21,165 --> 00:33:23,765
Speaker 5: to pull back from work, I need to have a massage.

622
00:33:23,845 --> 00:33:25,645
Speaker 5: I need to go for a walk. I need to

623
00:33:25,685 --> 00:33:27,845
Speaker 5: just go to my room and just cry for a bit.

624
00:33:27,885 --> 00:33:29,965
Speaker 5: I need to go read a book, and it was

625
00:33:30,165 --> 00:33:33,125
Speaker 5: just it was little subtle things, and you know what

626
00:33:33,165 --> 00:33:35,405
Speaker 5: I really needed to do. I really needed to start

627
00:33:36,125 --> 00:33:39,125
Speaker 5: being kind of how I spoke to myself. That was

628
00:33:39,165 --> 00:33:42,445
Speaker 5: a big thing for me because I'd been through the shame.

629
00:33:42,605 --> 00:33:46,005
Speaker 5: I'd been through, you know, even years before perimenopause. I

630
00:33:46,165 --> 00:33:49,525
Speaker 5: was very very hard on the way I looked and whatever.

631
00:33:49,965 --> 00:33:51,685
Speaker 5: A lot of women do that, I guess, but I

632
00:33:52,405 --> 00:33:56,205
Speaker 5: was like, you know what, Alie, enough, it's actually enough

633
00:33:56,285 --> 00:33:58,965
Speaker 5: that you're doing this, like you're going through a tough time,

634
00:33:59,285 --> 00:34:00,525
Speaker 5: You've got years ahead of you.

635
00:34:00,565 --> 00:34:03,805
Speaker 4: Can you just be nice? Just be nice to yourself.

636
00:34:03,845 --> 00:34:07,485
Speaker 5: So I really pulled back on that self critical talk,

637
00:34:08,005 --> 00:34:10,045
Speaker 5: and I felt so much free them and that I

638
00:34:10,205 --> 00:34:12,485
Speaker 5: said no when I wanted to say no. I said

639
00:34:12,565 --> 00:34:14,925
Speaker 5: yes when I wanted to say yes. And I started

640
00:34:14,965 --> 00:34:18,005
Speaker 5: trying new things. I picked up different careers, I let

641
00:34:18,045 --> 00:34:21,285
Speaker 5: go of fear of things, and so I actually found

642
00:34:22,005 --> 00:34:26,205
Speaker 5: an incredibly invigorating to go through perimenopause and get to

643
00:34:26,245 --> 00:34:28,725
Speaker 5: that I'm now post. But I also think at the

644
00:34:28,805 --> 00:34:32,685
Speaker 5: same time, it's like to have that experience of the

645
00:34:32,805 --> 00:34:36,445
Speaker 5: challenges was actually really what gave me that base to

646
00:34:36,525 --> 00:34:41,005
Speaker 5: then spring forward into Yeah, just a much much better

647
00:34:41,045 --> 00:34:41,885
Speaker 5: part of my life.

648
00:34:41,925 --> 00:34:45,045
Speaker 4: I'm happier now and healthier now than I ever have been.

649
00:34:45,965 --> 00:34:47,565
Speaker 1: Ginny. One of the things that a lot of women

650
00:34:48,005 --> 00:34:52,325
Speaker 1: experience around this time is a change in libido, and

651
00:34:52,485 --> 00:34:56,725
Speaker 1: sometimes they feel that it might be that I don't

652
00:34:56,765 --> 00:34:59,685
Speaker 1: love their partner anymore. And it's no accident that a

653
00:34:59,725 --> 00:35:02,965
Speaker 1: lot of women get divorced at this time. What do

654
00:35:03,085 --> 00:35:05,045
Speaker 1: you see and what advice do you give to the

655
00:35:05,085 --> 00:35:07,965
Speaker 1: women that you see in terms of managing that, because

656
00:35:08,005 --> 00:35:10,725
Speaker 1: it might not be in concert with the partner in

657
00:35:10,765 --> 00:35:13,005
Speaker 1: their life if they have one.

658
00:35:13,285 --> 00:35:17,365
Speaker 6: Okay, so a couple of things. First of all, your vagina,

659
00:35:17,765 --> 00:35:21,925
Speaker 6: we have to talk about her. Your vagina has estrogen receptors,

660
00:35:22,005 --> 00:35:24,525
Speaker 6: kind of said that they're everywhere. They help her to

661
00:35:24,645 --> 00:35:27,645
Speaker 6: make the self cleaning fluid that is the vaginal discharge

662
00:35:27,685 --> 00:35:28,765
Speaker 6: five meals is normal.

663
00:35:29,725 --> 00:35:30,845
Speaker 1: You never miss it so.

664
00:35:30,885 --> 00:35:33,485
Speaker 6: Much until you don't have it, because sex is really

665
00:35:33,605 --> 00:35:36,685
Speaker 6: uncomfortable and you're not going to get libido happening if

666
00:35:36,725 --> 00:35:39,525
Speaker 6: it feels like your vagina is being rammed by sandpaper

667
00:35:39,565 --> 00:35:41,765
Speaker 6: covered battering ramp, it's just not going.

668
00:35:41,765 --> 00:35:43,165
Speaker 1: To be fun, not sexy.

669
00:35:43,485 --> 00:35:48,885
Speaker 6: No, write that down. So note to self, Reno the

670
00:35:48,965 --> 00:35:50,005
Speaker 6: VJJ first.

671
00:35:50,205 --> 00:35:50,605
Speaker 1: Okay.

672
00:35:51,205 --> 00:35:54,085
Speaker 6: The other thing is, if you are feeling really hot,

673
00:35:54,565 --> 00:35:57,725
Speaker 6: another body on top of you is just your worst nightmare.

674
00:35:57,725 --> 00:36:01,005
Speaker 6: And if you are exhausted and your hottest bedroom fantasy

675
00:36:01,165 --> 00:36:04,645
Speaker 6: involves a sleep mask and a pillow, it's just not

676
00:36:04,725 --> 00:36:07,725
Speaker 6: good for the libido. Let's say you've worked all of

677
00:36:07,725 --> 00:36:11,725
Speaker 6: that out. There are two types of low libido. Low

678
00:36:11,765 --> 00:36:14,565
Speaker 6: lobido number one is I really don't want this. I'm

679
00:36:14,565 --> 00:36:16,285
Speaker 6: going to make an excuse. I'm going to be on

680
00:36:16,325 --> 00:36:19,165
Speaker 6: the phone. I'm going to be brushing my teeth for

681
00:36:19,205 --> 00:36:20,325
Speaker 6: an hour, hoping.

682
00:36:20,085 --> 00:36:20,965
Speaker 1: He falls asleep.

683
00:36:21,285 --> 00:36:23,085
Speaker 6: But then occasionally you give in, you do it, and

684
00:36:23,165 --> 00:36:24,525
Speaker 6: you go, you know what, that was actually quite good.

685
00:36:24,565 --> 00:36:27,285
Speaker 6: I should probably do that more often. We call that

686
00:36:27,725 --> 00:36:29,765
Speaker 6: being married. That's very common.

687
00:36:30,565 --> 00:36:30,885
Speaker 1: Okay.

688
00:36:34,165 --> 00:36:38,485
Speaker 6: Low libido number two is quite different. Okay, that is, well,

689
00:36:38,485 --> 00:36:40,485
Speaker 6: that's ten minutes of my life. I don't get back.

690
00:36:41,645 --> 00:36:46,405
Speaker 6: I didn't orgasm, you can't orgasm, you have no sexual fantasies,

691
00:36:46,725 --> 00:36:50,445
Speaker 6: and you never ever masturbate. Now we never talk about this,

692
00:36:50,645 --> 00:36:54,885
Speaker 6: but that is called hyperactive sexual desire disorder. I ask

693
00:36:54,925 --> 00:36:58,645
Speaker 6: all my new patients about this. They're just horrified, predible,

694
00:36:58,765 --> 00:37:00,085
Speaker 6: and ask them about their masturbation.

695
00:37:00,445 --> 00:37:01,645
Speaker 1: But when we do.

696
00:37:01,685 --> 00:37:05,005
Speaker 6: Ask, there's a reason because if you meet the criteria

697
00:37:05,045 --> 00:37:07,045
Speaker 6: for hyperactive sexual desire disorder, which.

698
00:37:06,965 --> 00:37:09,165
Speaker 1: Is more common. I'm not asking for a show of hands,

699
00:37:09,365 --> 00:37:12,525
Speaker 1: but statistically, but if you want to but where about

700
00:37:12,525 --> 00:37:13,365
Speaker 1: ten percent.

701
00:37:13,085 --> 00:37:16,885
Speaker 6: Of the population fit that criteria and you have low

702
00:37:16,925 --> 00:37:21,525
Speaker 6: testosterone levels, the advice of the International Menopause Society is

703
00:37:21,525 --> 00:37:25,005
Speaker 6: that you would benefit from testosterone. Now, in the case

704
00:37:25,045 --> 00:37:27,965
Speaker 6: of women, we are very lucky here in Australia. We

705
00:37:28,125 --> 00:37:31,565
Speaker 6: have a product that's formulated here and manufactured.

706
00:37:30,965 --> 00:37:31,725
Speaker 1: Here in Australia.

707
00:37:31,925 --> 00:37:33,965
Speaker 6: You put a little bit like on kind of around

708
00:37:34,005 --> 00:37:36,045
Speaker 6: your bikini line, keep changing it otherwise you're going to

709
00:37:36,045 --> 00:37:38,645
Speaker 6: grow black hair where you don't want it on your belly.

710
00:37:38,485 --> 00:37:40,285
Speaker 1: As if the patch is not off putting enough.

711
00:37:40,485 --> 00:37:42,485
Speaker 6: So is it a cream or it's a cream and

712
00:37:42,525 --> 00:37:44,925
Speaker 6: you put one meal on a day and then we

713
00:37:45,045 --> 00:37:48,125
Speaker 6: retest your testosterone levels. But it is a game changer

714
00:37:48,965 --> 00:37:52,805
Speaker 6: as to whether it gives you other benefits. Brain benefits,

715
00:37:52,845 --> 00:37:54,925
Speaker 6: gets rid of your brain fag, gets rid of depression.

716
00:37:55,445 --> 00:37:57,965
Speaker 6: Have any of you heard of doctor Louise Newsoen in

717
00:37:58,005 --> 00:38:01,085
Speaker 6: the UK. Yes, I'm a big fan of hers. She

718
00:38:01,885 --> 00:38:05,965
Speaker 6: runs multiple clinics in the UK, and she has actually

719
00:38:05,965 --> 00:38:09,005
Speaker 6: a data scientist working within her clinics, so everybody has

720
00:38:09,045 --> 00:38:14,085
Speaker 6: di identified data. According to her data, testosterone is very

721
00:38:14,085 --> 00:38:17,245
Speaker 6: powerful for brain fog, very powerful for strength, but also

722
00:38:17,325 --> 00:38:19,645
Speaker 6: very powerful for depression as well. Now that data is

723
00:38:19,685 --> 00:38:22,045
Speaker 6: not good enough, we would not call that a randomized

724
00:38:22,045 --> 00:38:26,045
Speaker 6: plus ABO controlled trial at this point. According to international guidelines,

725
00:38:26,205 --> 00:38:28,405
Speaker 6: you would only get that if you have hyperactive sexual

726
00:38:28,445 --> 00:38:30,565
Speaker 6: desire disorder, but you're probably going to get a few

727
00:38:30,605 --> 00:38:31,205
Speaker 6: other benefits.

728
00:38:31,245 --> 00:38:34,325
Speaker 1: Throwning Wow, it's a lot to take in. Yeah.

729
00:38:34,405 --> 00:38:39,005
Speaker 3: Actually, I'll say I just added that to my routine.

730
00:38:39,405 --> 00:38:42,725
Speaker 3: I had tried it earlier on and I didn't like

731
00:38:42,805 --> 00:38:44,445
Speaker 3: it at the time that I tried it, And this

732
00:38:44,565 --> 00:38:46,685
Speaker 3: is just a testament to what you said before about

733
00:38:46,765 --> 00:38:50,325
Speaker 3: hormones going up and down, and obviously I didn't need

734
00:38:50,365 --> 00:38:52,605
Speaker 3: it that much. I even got like a little bit

735
00:38:52,605 --> 00:38:56,525
Speaker 3: of that, oh you know, like the male kind of rage,

736
00:38:56,605 --> 00:38:59,685
Speaker 3: I suppose, so I stopped it, and then recently I've

737
00:38:59,725 --> 00:39:03,205
Speaker 3: added it. In America, we're given drops. Do you not

738
00:39:03,365 --> 00:39:03,725
Speaker 3: like those?

739
00:39:04,485 --> 00:39:08,005
Speaker 1: Just not great absorption? Okay, just stock up while you're here,

740
00:39:08,045 --> 00:39:16,565
Speaker 1: because because they sell me. But I actually I'll give

741
00:39:16,565 --> 00:39:21,605
Speaker 1: you negotiate your tree to.

742
00:39:21,565 --> 00:39:22,725
Speaker 4: Speak to the brain fog.

743
00:39:22,845 --> 00:39:26,125
Speaker 3: Yes, it makes me clearer and more focused in say

744
00:39:26,205 --> 00:39:28,725
Speaker 3: a meeting or you know, a situation where you have

745
00:39:28,765 --> 00:39:32,525
Speaker 3: to be more on top of things, more in control.

746
00:39:32,805 --> 00:39:35,925
Speaker 6: And because we're not trying to turn you into a man,

747
00:39:36,045 --> 00:39:38,205
Speaker 6: we're not giving you the kind of testosterone levels that

748
00:39:38,245 --> 00:39:40,485
Speaker 6: are going to actually make you turn into a bloke.

749
00:39:40,725 --> 00:39:41,565
Speaker 1: We're trying to get.

750
00:39:41,405 --> 00:39:45,085
Speaker 6: Your testosterone levels up to a premenopausal woman's test austerone levels.

751
00:39:45,085 --> 00:39:45,885
Speaker 4: That's all I've heard.

752
00:39:45,885 --> 00:39:50,405
Speaker 3: It can if you overdo it, your clitoris can change.

753
00:39:50,205 --> 00:39:54,165
Speaker 1: It does it grows, You can grow a penis. Don't

754
00:39:54,165 --> 00:39:54,445
Speaker 1: do that.

755
00:39:54,565 --> 00:39:59,605
Speaker 6: Not Attractive's so many things today, But will continue to

756
00:39:59,645 --> 00:40:00,925
Speaker 6: monitor your blood levels.

757
00:40:01,125 --> 00:40:01,805
Speaker 1: We're giving you.

758
00:40:01,845 --> 00:40:07,045
Speaker 6: Really tiny amounts, hopefully not mandatory for every menopause check.

759
00:40:07,125 --> 00:40:08,685
Speaker 6: If you want to avoid the doctor, that's.

760
00:40:09,045 --> 00:40:22,245
Speaker 1: It's an option. I wanted to ask all of you

761
00:40:22,285 --> 00:40:25,165
Speaker 1: actually about the brain fog because for me, that was

762
00:40:25,285 --> 00:40:28,925
Speaker 1: one of the things I struggled with most, and it's

763
00:40:29,045 --> 00:40:32,965
Speaker 1: responsible for a lot of women leaving the workforce. We've

764
00:40:32,965 --> 00:40:35,685
Speaker 1: seen data on that it does happen. I know that

765
00:40:36,085 --> 00:40:38,845
Speaker 1: in terms of my self esteem it really affected it

766
00:40:38,885 --> 00:40:41,485
Speaker 1: because I, you know, trying to run a business. I

767
00:40:41,525 --> 00:40:45,245
Speaker 1: pride myself on being pretty sharp, and I just really

768
00:40:45,325 --> 00:40:48,565
Speaker 1: affected my self esteem. Ali, was brain fog something that

769
00:40:48,605 --> 00:40:50,565
Speaker 1: you experienced or can't you remember?

770
00:40:52,685 --> 00:40:55,885
Speaker 4: What is our brain? Yeah? Absolutely definitely.

771
00:40:55,925 --> 00:40:59,605
Speaker 5: And I was always the one that held the memory

772
00:40:59,645 --> 00:41:03,085
Speaker 5: in the partnership between me and Cam, like always got

773
00:41:03,085 --> 00:41:06,045
Speaker 5: brain fog, so he would always rely on me to

774
00:41:06,085 --> 00:41:09,165
Speaker 5: remember people's names and birthdays and stuff, and I just

775
00:41:09,525 --> 00:41:14,405
Speaker 5: that just started slipping away. So yeah, that was definitely something,

776
00:41:14,605 --> 00:41:16,645
Speaker 5: and it's still there, like it's I'm not.

777
00:41:16,605 --> 00:41:18,885
Speaker 4: As sharp as I used to be for sure.

778
00:41:19,525 --> 00:41:22,965
Speaker 5: But on that topic, I was just sent just recently

779
00:41:23,245 --> 00:41:25,565
Speaker 5: a preview of a book it's coming out next year.

780
00:41:26,085 --> 00:41:31,925
Speaker 5: She's a neurologist, a top neurologist in Australia, Lisa mcconysconi Miscony.

781
00:41:32,005 --> 00:41:35,205
Speaker 5: She's written a book called Menopause Brain. And they actually

782
00:41:35,205 --> 00:41:35,845
Speaker 5: do imaging.

783
00:41:36,045 --> 00:41:37,965
Speaker 1: Remember I'm glad between the four of us we could

784
00:41:38,005 --> 00:41:38,805
Speaker 1: remember the names.

785
00:41:38,845 --> 00:41:39,805
Speaker 4: I'm so excited.

786
00:41:40,045 --> 00:41:43,165
Speaker 5: And they did imaging of perimenopause, menopause and post menopause

787
00:41:43,205 --> 00:41:46,085
Speaker 5: and how the brain actually changes, and it was I

788
00:41:46,085 --> 00:41:49,645
Speaker 5: thought that was so interesting because you know, this idea

789
00:41:49,685 --> 00:41:52,405
Speaker 5: that we're sort of left as women that I'm going

790
00:41:52,485 --> 00:41:55,085
Speaker 5: crazy or I don't know, I just feel off. And

791
00:41:55,085 --> 00:41:57,285
Speaker 5: that's why I think part of the challenge of going

792
00:41:57,325 --> 00:42:00,325
Speaker 5: to a doctor is because you can't often define what

793
00:42:00,365 --> 00:42:03,445
Speaker 5: you're feeling. You just don't feel like yourself. And the

794
00:42:03,485 --> 00:42:07,445
Speaker 5: more information that we have to go, yes, that is

795
00:42:07,645 --> 00:42:10,925
Speaker 5: actually a real thing is exciting to me, and I

796
00:42:10,965 --> 00:42:14,685
Speaker 5: think that helps more women to go, this is actually

797
00:42:14,725 --> 00:42:18,005
Speaker 5: what's happening. The brain fog is real because I can

798
00:42:18,125 --> 00:42:20,685
Speaker 5: now there's a book where there's other doctors talking about it.

799
00:42:20,845 --> 00:42:23,885
Speaker 4: So yeah, long answer, but yeah, I had brain fog. No,

800
00:42:23,965 --> 00:42:24,565
Speaker 4: that was great.

801
00:42:24,605 --> 00:42:27,045
Speaker 3: And if I can add to it, like we should

802
00:42:27,045 --> 00:42:30,245
Speaker 3: start this conversation in sex ed at school when they

803
00:42:30,285 --> 00:42:34,045
Speaker 3: start the conversation about puberty. This is the bookend. It's

804
00:42:34,045 --> 00:42:35,605
Speaker 3: an adult version of it.

805
00:42:36,365 --> 00:42:39,965
Speaker 1: You know, take it. That's us puberty, right. Yeah.

806
00:42:40,085 --> 00:42:44,245
Speaker 3: Basically, I know I've sat here making jokes about hormones

807
00:42:44,285 --> 00:42:47,085
Speaker 3: and everything. I take it very seriously, and I know

808
00:42:47,165 --> 00:42:50,405
Speaker 3: it's not everyone's choice or possibly not safe for everyone,

809
00:42:50,445 --> 00:42:53,445
Speaker 3: but to have your doctor walk you through it is

810
00:42:53,685 --> 00:42:57,845
Speaker 3: absolutely key to if we could have just a simple

811
00:42:58,645 --> 00:43:01,685
Speaker 3: medical alignment on what's going on. Because there are so

812
00:43:01,765 --> 00:43:05,725
Speaker 3: many doctors that disagree with each other and still uphold

813
00:43:05,765 --> 00:43:09,005
Speaker 3: this bad messaging. We need to know that we need

814
00:43:09,045 --> 00:43:10,885
Speaker 3: better research for women.

815
00:43:11,485 --> 00:43:12,765
Speaker 4: It's just not enough.

816
00:43:13,325 --> 00:43:16,205
Speaker 3: We're living longer, so why can't we be better set up?

817
00:43:16,325 --> 00:43:18,125
Speaker 3: And you have to be a little bit of your

818
00:43:18,165 --> 00:43:21,405
Speaker 3: own best advocate. But you also need to demand more

819
00:43:21,405 --> 00:43:24,445
Speaker 3: from your doctors. And it's absolutely true. I've sat in

820
00:43:24,565 --> 00:43:28,685
Speaker 3: many of these panels and watched surveys play out. They

821
00:43:28,685 --> 00:43:31,645
Speaker 3: are not trained at all. It's up to them to

822
00:43:31,645 --> 00:43:32,525
Speaker 3: get their training.

823
00:43:33,125 --> 00:43:34,965
Speaker 1: So you have to trust yourself.

824
00:43:35,085 --> 00:43:38,365
Speaker 3: But now with all of the information just arising as

825
00:43:38,405 --> 00:43:40,925
Speaker 3: this conversation's opened up in the last couple of years,

826
00:43:41,525 --> 00:43:44,325
Speaker 3: you can go at least equip with the right amount

827
00:43:44,365 --> 00:43:47,165
Speaker 3: of questions and advocate for yourself.

828
00:43:47,565 --> 00:43:49,245
Speaker 1: One of the things that I think has just been

829
00:43:49,285 --> 00:43:54,365
Speaker 1: so fantastic about living in this time now is we

830
00:43:54,405 --> 00:43:57,845
Speaker 1: all talked about the secrecy, the shame, the stigma, the

831
00:43:57,925 --> 00:44:01,005
Speaker 1: lack of information. I know when at Noma MEA we

832
00:44:01,045 --> 00:44:04,605
Speaker 1: did the very very summit a few years ago, and

833
00:44:04,645 --> 00:44:07,165
Speaker 1: there were tens of thousands of women that were like,

834
00:44:07,405 --> 00:44:10,325
Speaker 1: oh my god, me too, me too. Because I think

835
00:44:10,365 --> 00:44:12,125
Speaker 1: one of the most challenging things I know for me

836
00:44:12,245 --> 00:44:15,325
Speaker 1: and many women said the same thing is that because

837
00:44:15,365 --> 00:44:19,925
Speaker 1: the symptoms are so random, not random, but disparate, everything

838
00:44:19,965 --> 00:44:22,885
Speaker 1: from hot flushes to brain fog to heavy periods to

839
00:44:23,045 --> 00:44:28,285
Speaker 1: rage to libido, it can be very hard to understand

840
00:44:28,325 --> 00:44:30,485
Speaker 1: that they're all part of the same thing. It wasn't

841
00:44:30,525 --> 00:44:33,685
Speaker 1: until I went to see an endocrinologist because I suspected

842
00:44:33,725 --> 00:44:37,005
Speaker 1: that's what it was, and he actually said to me,

843
00:44:37,045 --> 00:44:39,405
Speaker 1: you're the first patient i've seen today and I've seen

844
00:44:39,565 --> 00:44:43,605
Speaker 1: fifteen that hasn't cried. And I said, I just got here.

845
00:44:43,605 --> 00:44:47,405
Speaker 1: There's still time. And I was really grateful that I was.

846
00:44:47,925 --> 00:44:49,765
Speaker 1: You know, he's named Professor John Eden, one of the

847
00:44:49,805 --> 00:44:53,445
Speaker 1: early experts in menopause and perimenopause, and he talked me

848
00:44:53,525 --> 00:44:56,485
Speaker 1: through HRT. Because I hadn't, I assumed that my mum

849
00:44:56,525 --> 00:44:58,725
Speaker 1: wasn't on it. But when I spoke to her, she goes, oh, absolutely,

850
00:44:58,765 --> 00:45:01,005
Speaker 1: of course I'm on it. And so you know, I

851
00:45:01,045 --> 00:45:03,285
Speaker 1: got on it too. And I also speak to women

852
00:45:03,325 --> 00:45:04,845
Speaker 1: who are very nervous about it, and you've got to

853
00:45:04,885 --> 00:45:07,965
Speaker 1: make the right decision for you. But women talking about

854
00:45:07,965 --> 00:45:10,245
Speaker 1: it now, I think this is just such a wonderful thing.

855
00:45:10,245 --> 00:45:12,125
Speaker 1: In the same way that we talk about mental health

856
00:45:12,205 --> 00:45:15,565
Speaker 1: now and a generation ago we didn't. You know, Ginny,

857
00:45:15,725 --> 00:45:20,845
Speaker 1: what is the biggest the biggest misconception about this phase

858
00:45:20,885 --> 00:45:21,685
Speaker 1: of life?

859
00:45:22,085 --> 00:45:25,445
Speaker 6: Like you guys, I hadn't heard of perimenopause, and I

860
00:45:25,485 --> 00:45:28,605
Speaker 6: had a lot of misconceptions doctor, and I'm a adult

861
00:45:28,765 --> 00:45:32,765
Speaker 6: doctor and I was doing women's health. And I'm so

862
00:45:32,965 --> 00:45:35,725
Speaker 6: ashamed now cancel me for saying that. I know she's

863
00:45:35,725 --> 00:45:39,725
Speaker 6: a woman, I know she's not a girl. But I

864
00:45:39,885 --> 00:45:44,005
Speaker 6: feel now that I let the patients down because I

865
00:45:44,045 --> 00:45:45,645
Speaker 6: had no idea what was going on.

866
00:45:46,125 --> 00:45:48,085
Speaker 1: And I'm really lucky.

867
00:45:47,845 --> 00:45:51,205
Speaker 6: That I host a podcast which is educational for doctors,

868
00:45:51,605 --> 00:45:54,245
Speaker 6: and we had so many menopause specialists coming on, and

869
00:45:54,285 --> 00:45:57,165
Speaker 6: every time I would hear someone like John Eden or

870
00:45:57,165 --> 00:46:00,285
Speaker 6: Professor Rod Baber or Professor Susan Davis. Australia's got an

871
00:46:00,325 --> 00:46:04,085
Speaker 6: unbelievable menopause specialist, I would think, I don't know any

872
00:46:04,125 --> 00:46:04,645
Speaker 6: of this.

873
00:46:04,645 --> 00:46:06,765
Speaker 1: This is a black hole in my knowledge.

874
00:46:07,205 --> 00:46:09,885
Speaker 6: When the publishers of this book came to me and

875
00:46:09,965 --> 00:46:12,245
Speaker 6: said we would like you to write a book on menopause,

876
00:46:12,285 --> 00:46:12,445
Speaker 6: I was.

877
00:46:12,445 --> 00:46:15,565
Speaker 1: Like, fuck off, how old do you think I am? Yeah?

878
00:46:15,805 --> 00:46:19,205
Speaker 1: And then and then I was like, oh wait, fifty yes,

879
00:46:20,165 --> 00:46:22,445
Speaker 1: but were you a bit like that's not really Oh

880
00:46:22,485 --> 00:46:23,605
Speaker 1: how I see myself?

881
00:46:23,685 --> 00:46:25,485
Speaker 6: I was like, I'm young, like joe't you want me

882
00:46:25,525 --> 00:46:27,085
Speaker 6: to write a parenting book on toddlers?

883
00:46:27,125 --> 00:46:30,685
Speaker 1: But no? But then I was like okay, and I

884
00:46:30,805 --> 00:46:31,565
Speaker 1: like fell into that.

885
00:46:31,605 --> 00:46:34,605
Speaker 6: You're like, there's so much to know and now there's

886
00:46:34,645 --> 00:46:37,285
Speaker 6: like a network of like doctin most phenomenal handbook.

887
00:46:38,045 --> 00:46:38,405
Speaker 1: Thank you.

888
00:46:38,485 --> 00:46:41,805
Speaker 6: So when I first started practicing in menopause, because.

889
00:46:41,565 --> 00:46:43,165
Speaker 1: It hooks you in, because you can do more.

890
00:46:43,045 --> 00:46:44,805
Speaker 6: Good for people in this space in life than you

891
00:46:44,805 --> 00:46:46,805
Speaker 6: can for any other group of people at all.

892
00:46:46,885 --> 00:46:48,005
Speaker 1: It's so addictive.

893
00:46:48,845 --> 00:46:51,405
Speaker 6: When I first started in this space, people would be

894
00:46:51,525 --> 00:46:54,845
Speaker 6: very tentative coming to see me and really sheepish and

895
00:46:54,885 --> 00:46:55,645
Speaker 6: what else could I do?

896
00:46:55,685 --> 00:46:56,965
Speaker 1: I don't really want to do hormones.

897
00:46:57,245 --> 00:46:59,165
Speaker 6: Now I'm very likely to have a forty one year

898
00:46:59,165 --> 00:47:01,085
Speaker 6: old woman who says, Hi, I'm crying all the time.

899
00:47:01,125 --> 00:47:03,445
Speaker 6: Can I have hormone replacement therapy? I'm like, wo, tanto,

900
00:47:03,565 --> 00:47:04,565
Speaker 6: tell me about your periods.

901
00:47:05,845 --> 00:47:06,765
Speaker 1: But a lot of that.

902
00:47:08,485 --> 00:47:10,605
Speaker 6: I am really great full to the other three women

903
00:47:10,645 --> 00:47:13,325
Speaker 6: on this panel who've made an enormous difference. I think

904
00:47:13,645 --> 00:47:15,765
Speaker 6: starting with you may I remember when we first started

905
00:47:15,765 --> 00:47:18,525
Speaker 6: talking about the Very Pery Summit. I was like, that

906
00:47:18,725 --> 00:47:20,765
Speaker 6: is so brave. You're going to go out there and

907
00:47:20,805 --> 00:47:24,645
Speaker 6: say that you're perimenopausal. And I think Ali's book coming out,

908
00:47:24,645 --> 00:47:27,965
Speaker 6: but also I think particularly to Naomi, because the world

909
00:47:28,085 --> 00:47:32,005
Speaker 6: has changed because of you and everybody in this room,

910
00:47:32,165 --> 00:47:33,005
Speaker 6: and everybody is.

911
00:47:32,965 --> 00:47:40,965
Speaker 1: A beneficiary of that. So thank you. Just to wrap up,

912
00:47:41,245 --> 00:47:43,725
Speaker 1: I wanted sort of just go through and ask each

913
00:47:43,765 --> 00:47:47,405
Speaker 1: of you to sum up where you're at, you know now,

914
00:47:47,445 --> 00:47:51,445
Speaker 1: with your symptoms, with your outlook, and what's great about

915
00:47:51,445 --> 00:47:52,365
Speaker 1: being in your fifties.

916
00:47:53,285 --> 00:47:56,205
Speaker 5: My people, please, is pretty much gone to sleep. I

917
00:47:56,285 --> 00:48:00,125
Speaker 5: find myself feeling way more creative than I ever have before.

918
00:48:00,685 --> 00:48:03,965
Speaker 5: I feel like I'm ready to sort of try new things.

919
00:48:04,005 --> 00:48:06,405
Speaker 5: It's a weird thing, like I think I'd had this

920
00:48:06,485 --> 00:48:09,045
Speaker 5: idea that you got stuck in one line of work

921
00:48:09,925 --> 00:48:12,325
Speaker 5: you just you couldn't change. You're too old to do this.

922
00:48:12,845 --> 00:48:16,005
Speaker 5: For me, I could go do another course on something,

923
00:48:16,365 --> 00:48:20,605
Speaker 5: or change complete careers and do something else that invigorates me.

924
00:48:20,845 --> 00:48:23,765
Speaker 5: So yeah, I'm excited. I'm excited to be a grandma.

925
00:48:23,845 --> 00:48:26,365
Speaker 5: I'm not that my kids are pregnant, but I'm excited

926
00:48:26,405 --> 00:48:29,445
Speaker 5: for that phase of life. Yeah, there's just there's so

927
00:48:29,565 --> 00:48:32,085
Speaker 5: much more that I want to sort of chew off

928
00:48:32,565 --> 00:48:33,845
Speaker 5: and eat Jimmy.

929
00:48:34,885 --> 00:48:37,125
Speaker 6: So, yeah, I'm still in perimenopause and I've had a

930
00:48:37,245 --> 00:48:39,565
Speaker 6: very easy journey. I feel very guilty about saying it.

931
00:48:39,605 --> 00:48:42,845
Speaker 6: My worst thing was very heavy bleeding, so I needed.

932
00:48:42,565 --> 00:48:44,285
Speaker 1: To have How do you know you're still in perry

933
00:48:44,485 --> 00:48:47,925
Speaker 1: Because I've got regular periods, so reasonably regular ish. But

934
00:48:48,045 --> 00:48:50,605
Speaker 1: if you have a marina like I do, I do.

935
00:48:50,685 --> 00:48:54,165
Speaker 1: Everyone wanted to know that, it can be hard to know.

936
00:48:54,445 --> 00:48:56,925
Speaker 1: So a marina for those playing along at home is

937
00:48:57,245 --> 00:48:59,965
Speaker 1: an IUD. Why don't we get the adoptor to tell

938
00:49:00,005 --> 00:49:01,805
Speaker 1: us where the marina is instead of me?

939
00:49:02,485 --> 00:49:05,005
Speaker 6: So it's a little device that sits inside your uterus

940
00:49:05,125 --> 00:49:08,285
Speaker 6: and it has progesterone that comes out every single day.

941
00:49:08,325 --> 00:49:10,845
Speaker 6: It is a synthetic jestone, one of the old school ones.

942
00:49:10,885 --> 00:49:14,925
Speaker 6: We don't have an available marina with the new body identical.

943
00:49:15,405 --> 00:49:16,965
Speaker 1: It means that you don't get your period, so it

944
00:49:17,045 --> 00:49:19,285
Speaker 1: can be heart well, sorry, it's for some of us.

945
00:49:19,645 --> 00:49:22,765
Speaker 1: Yeah people, I mean I still get my period because

946
00:49:22,845 --> 00:49:24,765
Speaker 1: that's what it's got one too. Yeah, I've had one

947
00:49:24,805 --> 00:49:27,325
Speaker 1: since my daughter was born. And she's twenty six now,

948
00:49:27,365 --> 00:49:30,125
Speaker 1: so I just keep changing it every five years. But

949
00:49:30,245 --> 00:49:32,965
Speaker 1: I definitely knew something was wrong when I was hosting

950
00:49:33,045 --> 00:49:36,085
Speaker 1: radio at two GB. If anyone knows anything about.

951
00:49:35,845 --> 00:49:38,525
Speaker 6: What two GB is, it's not the radio station where

952
00:49:38,525 --> 00:49:41,245
Speaker 6: it's really easy to do the walk of shame.

953
00:49:41,365 --> 00:49:43,765
Speaker 1: I imagine there aren't free tampons in the bathroom. There are.

954
00:49:44,445 --> 00:49:47,645
Speaker 6: I'm coma where they've worked out that no nobody steals

955
00:49:47,685 --> 00:49:49,845
Speaker 6: tampons when you keep them at work. We actually, the

956
00:49:49,925 --> 00:49:52,885
Speaker 6: Sisterhood says you just have respect for the fact that

957
00:49:53,005 --> 00:49:55,165
Speaker 6: nobody wants to do the walk of shame. So when

958
00:49:55,205 --> 00:49:57,445
Speaker 6: I had a massive flood into my jenes in the

959
00:49:57,485 --> 00:49:59,805
Speaker 6: middle of a radio show and had to do the

960
00:49:59,845 --> 00:50:02,405
Speaker 6: walk of shame, and you know what, is there anybody

961
00:50:02,445 --> 00:50:05,205
Speaker 6: else in the building with a vagina and a tampon? No,

962
00:50:05,885 --> 00:50:08,805
Speaker 6: and no was not able to go to the local

963
00:50:08,845 --> 00:50:11,525
Speaker 6: seven line and just had to use a stacker toiler baker.

964
00:50:11,885 --> 00:50:13,805
Speaker 6: That's how I worked out that I had a pollop

965
00:50:14,285 --> 00:50:16,005
Speaker 6: and I had that change. But other than that, I've

966
00:50:16,045 --> 00:50:21,045
Speaker 6: had a very easy pery. But being part a tiny part,

967
00:50:21,125 --> 00:50:23,485
Speaker 6: but being ever so small a part of this movement

968
00:50:24,125 --> 00:50:28,045
Speaker 6: that is helping women not go through what our mothers

969
00:50:28,125 --> 00:50:31,645
Speaker 6: did and how they suffered, and how they all had

970
00:50:31,765 --> 00:50:36,205
Speaker 6: hysterectomies at early ages for no reason, and how they

971
00:50:36,285 --> 00:50:39,365
Speaker 6: were shamed and stigmatized and couldn't talk to us about it.

972
00:50:39,445 --> 00:50:43,725
Speaker 6: Playing that little role makes every day so exciting and

973
00:50:44,245 --> 00:50:45,965
Speaker 6: just an absolute thrill to be part of it.

974
00:50:46,845 --> 00:50:50,085
Speaker 1: Naomi, want to finish with you. You've come out, you've

975
00:50:50,205 --> 00:50:55,325
Speaker 1: overcome the stigma, the shame, you've launched a business, you've remarried.

976
00:50:55,925 --> 00:50:59,085
Speaker 1: It's a pretty exciting time of your life from the outside.

977
00:50:59,245 --> 00:51:01,445
Speaker 1: How's it feeling on the inside. Great?

978
00:51:02,085 --> 00:51:04,365
Speaker 3: But first, I'm married for the first time.

979
00:51:04,725 --> 00:51:09,605
Speaker 1: I will say first, yeah, which was really lovely white

980
00:51:09,645 --> 00:51:11,725
Speaker 1: Well we all saw were so sheep.

981
00:51:13,165 --> 00:51:16,005
Speaker 4: I feel so and I lovely Sorry, Oh thank you,

982
00:51:16,325 --> 00:51:17,085
Speaker 4: I think so too.

983
00:51:18,165 --> 00:51:20,845
Speaker 3: I feel like being on the other side of it now,

984
00:51:21,285 --> 00:51:24,125
Speaker 3: understanding everything we've been through.

985
00:51:24,205 --> 00:51:24,565
Speaker 4: Everything.

986
00:51:24,645 --> 00:51:26,965
Speaker 3: Part of the reason I called it stripes was that

987
00:51:27,525 --> 00:51:29,485
Speaker 3: this is a time to shine. This is a time

988
00:51:29,565 --> 00:51:32,445
Speaker 3: to feel your best and feel like you can hold

989
00:51:32,485 --> 00:51:37,085
Speaker 3: your head high. Your cumulative experiences matter, and you've earned

990
00:51:37,125 --> 00:51:41,125
Speaker 3: your stripes. And so I wanted to sort of reinvent

991
00:51:41,445 --> 00:51:45,365
Speaker 3: this narrative and make us feel like proud of this time.

992
00:51:45,965 --> 00:51:48,645
Speaker 3: We do get to the other side and feel like

993
00:51:48,725 --> 00:51:52,645
Speaker 3: there's a reclaiming of oneselves. Our hormones have driven us

994
00:51:53,565 --> 00:51:56,205
Speaker 3: entirely to this point, and sometimes not always in the

995
00:51:56,285 --> 00:51:59,645
Speaker 3: best direction, and so it's actually nice to be on

996
00:51:59,725 --> 00:52:02,805
Speaker 3: the other side of it. And yes, I still have symptoms. Yes,

997
00:52:03,005 --> 00:52:04,885
Speaker 3: I mean I've still we were talking about it in

998
00:52:04,965 --> 00:52:07,685
Speaker 3: the green room. I've got a frozen shoulder, and I

999
00:52:07,765 --> 00:52:08,725
Speaker 3: still get hot at night.

1000
00:52:08,845 --> 00:52:11,365
Speaker 1: Sometimes. HRT is not a.

1001
00:52:11,405 --> 00:52:14,605
Speaker 3: Silver bullet, but it is the gold standard and it's

1002
00:52:14,645 --> 00:52:15,125
Speaker 3: safe for me.

1003
00:52:15,285 --> 00:52:16,125
Speaker 1: So I feel good.

1004
00:52:16,285 --> 00:52:19,325
Speaker 3: I feel my best. I'm open to trying new things.

1005
00:52:19,445 --> 00:52:23,005
Speaker 3: I'm leaning into saying yes to as many opportunities and

1006
00:52:23,125 --> 00:52:27,285
Speaker 3: things that I haven't tried before. I don't care about

1007
00:52:27,365 --> 00:52:31,405
Speaker 3: the small shit anymore, or I give you less shits

1008
00:52:31,405 --> 00:52:35,405
Speaker 3: about it, And I feel like alive and like there's

1009
00:52:35,485 --> 00:52:38,205
Speaker 3: so much more to do. And I'm encouraged that we're

1010
00:52:38,645 --> 00:52:42,085
Speaker 3: normalizing this conversation between all of us that will be

1011
00:52:42,205 --> 00:52:46,685
Speaker 3: the last generation to have shame about it, and all

1012
00:52:46,725 --> 00:52:51,285
Speaker 3: of your daughters and younger sisters around you are going

1013
00:52:51,365 --> 00:52:54,445
Speaker 3: to feel well set up, and to me, that's great news.

1014
00:52:54,805 --> 00:52:57,445
Speaker 3: And yeah, I'm just happy that you guys are here

1015
00:52:57,645 --> 00:53:00,325
Speaker 3: to listen, because that means you're interested and invested to.

1016
00:53:01,965 --> 00:53:04,645
Speaker 1: I hope you enjoyed that. We certainly did. We had

1017
00:53:04,725 --> 00:53:07,005
Speaker 1: such a good time as I hope you could hear

1018
00:53:07,285 --> 00:53:09,845
Speaker 1: on that panel. I highly recommend follow all of these

1019
00:53:09,885 --> 00:53:12,165
Speaker 1: women on Instagram if you want to hear more from them,

1020
00:53:12,605 --> 00:53:15,525
Speaker 1: and we've got so many more resources at muma mia.

1021
00:53:15,605 --> 00:53:18,605
Speaker 1: If you are going through perimenopause or menopause, we'll put

1022
00:53:18,605 --> 00:53:21,245
Speaker 1: a link to those in the show notes. The executive

1023
00:53:21,285 --> 00:53:24,005
Speaker 1: producer of No fil Day is Kimberly Bradish, with sound

1024
00:53:24,045 --> 00:53:27,325
Speaker 1: production on this episode by Teagan Sadler and Madeline Juanni.

1025
00:53:27,765 --> 00:53:30,725
Speaker 1: I'm mea Friedman and thanks for supporting women's media.