WEBVTT - VBAC: Kee's Birth Plan 0:00:00.040 --> 0:00:03.080 We acknowledged the traditional custodians of the land. We're recording 0:00:03.120 --> 0:00:03.720 on today. 0:00:07.480 --> 0:00:09.960 Almost as soon as he pulled out of the driveway, 0:00:10.440 --> 0:00:16.200 I started bellowing like oh real, like yeah, And after 0:00:16.480 --> 0:00:19.239 maybe ten minutes of that, I was like on the toilet, 0:00:19.560 --> 0:00:21.720 and then I thought, I'm going to have a baby 0:00:21.720 --> 0:00:23.759 in the toilet if I don't get off right now. 0:00:25.360 --> 0:00:28.960 Hello, and welcome back to Eat, Sleep, Shit, Repeat, the 0:00:29.120 --> 0:00:32.360 Wildly Unhitched Podcast, all about the madness that is motherhood 0:00:32.560 --> 0:00:34.240 and every damn little thing in between. 0:00:34.240 --> 0:00:36.920 I'm Kiri Cells, I'm Kelly McCarron, and in case you 0:00:36.960 --> 0:00:40.040 missed it, on last week's episode, we talked to podcast 0:00:40.080 --> 0:00:43.640 host and disability advocate Peter Hook and how to talk 0:00:43.680 --> 0:00:45.520 to kids about disabilities. 0:00:45.600 --> 0:00:48.959 It was a. 0:00:47.680 --> 0:00:50.360 Must for everyone, not just people with kids. I think 0:00:50.360 --> 0:00:53.040 it was just a must. I absolutely loved that chat 0:00:53.080 --> 0:00:54.680 and we would love to get her back on the 0:00:54.720 --> 0:00:58.160 pod if you want to send in your questions on 0:00:58.240 --> 0:01:01.240 the show today, Key is going to share about the 0:01:01.280 --> 0:01:05.880 recent developments around the upcoming ish birth of baby number 0:01:05.880 --> 0:01:08.319 two and setting herself up for a. 0:01:10.600 --> 0:01:16.039 Bea be back vaginal birth after Cesari case you didn't 0:01:16.080 --> 0:01:20.440 know what the acronym was but first, kay, this episode's 0:01:20.440 --> 0:01:22.560 all about you do because you're. 0:01:22.480 --> 0:01:23.399 Up for peek and pit. 0:01:23.880 --> 0:01:27.800 There you go. So I think probably if the shitters 0:01:28.240 --> 0:01:30.640 have been listening for the past couple of weeks, you 0:01:30.680 --> 0:01:35.399 could tell that my mental health was not doing very great. Really, yeah, 0:01:35.720 --> 0:01:36.680 just lots. 0:01:36.360 --> 0:01:39.480 Of things I would have never guessed. 0:01:39.280 --> 0:01:42.360 On my plate, lots of you were so things to navigate, 0:01:42.680 --> 0:01:46.839 so just cal didn't cry once. No, no. So basically 0:01:46.880 --> 0:01:49.120 after that week, I felt like I had reached a 0:01:49.120 --> 0:01:49.800 bit of a rock. 0:01:49.640 --> 0:01:53.280 Botty, funny way to describe it. Given the week prior 0:01:53.400 --> 0:01:54.560 with the issues. 0:01:54.360 --> 0:01:57.160 Oh my god, I'm never going to get over these 0:01:57.240 --> 0:02:00.760 pooh joke Sally, and I just was like not feeling myself. 0:02:00.800 --> 0:02:03.840 I think after Europe it was a lot being away 0:02:03.840 --> 0:02:06.480 for so long, and then I had the shit storm, 0:02:06.680 --> 0:02:09.440 and then we had obviously my mother in law's birthday, 0:02:09.520 --> 0:02:12.080 and just as pregnancy has been so overwhelming, and I 0:02:12.240 --> 0:02:14.720 just kind of pulled Charlie aside and I was like, hey, 0:02:14.800 --> 0:02:18.679 I'm not doing well. I think I need to get 0:02:18.720 --> 0:02:23.400 on top of things. So went to the GP to 0:02:23.400 --> 0:02:25.680 fill out my mental health thing again. 0:02:26.360 --> 0:02:28.079 And it's a bit of a fun time isn't it. 0:02:28.760 --> 0:02:30.919 And it was just like she got the format and 0:02:30.960 --> 0:02:34.160 I started crying, and you're just like, she doesn't even 0:02:34.240 --> 0:02:38.600 ask them questions, pull yourself together. So embarrassing rooms with 0:02:38.600 --> 0:02:40.400 me obviously, because I'm taking it on like a Thursday 0:02:40.440 --> 0:02:44.480 or Friday. Anyway, it was just very clear from that 0:02:44.960 --> 0:02:47.400 scenario that I was in fact not doing well. 0:02:47.240 --> 0:02:50.239 That you would have failed the question I failed miserably. 0:02:50.600 --> 0:02:52.560 But you know what the really bad thing is is 0:02:52.600 --> 0:02:55.600 that I had to do it two days later with 0:02:55.639 --> 0:02:56.360 my midwife. 0:02:57.320 --> 0:02:59.600 Oh no, she had to do it twice. 0:03:00.000 --> 0:03:02.240 Its grim both times. 0:03:02.440 --> 0:03:03.480 It was pretty grim. 0:03:03.760 --> 0:03:07.000 It was pretty grim, and I just thought, of course, like, 0:03:07.080 --> 0:03:09.480 of course I've had to fill out a mental questionnaire 0:03:09.520 --> 0:03:13.200 and you know, the space of a few days. But 0:03:13.720 --> 0:03:16.600 I will say that for anyone listening who might be 0:03:16.680 --> 0:03:20.280 like not in a great place, honestly, like voicing it 0:03:20.320 --> 0:03:24.080 to Charlie, chatting to my GP, tell some lagging it 0:03:24.120 --> 0:03:24.359 with my. 0:03:24.320 --> 0:03:25.880 Midwes, someone that you don't feel okay. 0:03:26.120 --> 0:03:30.040 I felt instantly light better, lighter that I had just 0:03:30.160 --> 0:03:33.080 kind of like addressed the elephant in my head. You 0:03:33.160 --> 0:03:35.960 know that a lot of the stuff's internalized. I'm sure 0:03:35.960 --> 0:03:37.400 people are picking up on it, and I do talk 0:03:37.400 --> 0:03:39.800 about it to a certain extent, but it was like 0:03:39.840 --> 0:03:42.400 a bit of a release and it just thought, Okay, cool. 0:03:42.960 --> 0:03:43.680 I've released that. 0:03:43.800 --> 0:03:46.800 Now let's figure out a better way to move forward. 0:03:46.960 --> 0:03:49.880 So that's kind of my like little silver lining learning 0:03:49.920 --> 0:03:52.360 from that. It's like, if you are just feeling overwhelmed 0:03:52.360 --> 0:03:56.680 and stressed, talk to someone, tell someone. I mean, it's obvious, 0:03:56.800 --> 0:03:59.080 but sometimes you just need that little bit of a nudge. 0:03:59.120 --> 0:04:00.920 And hopefully I can be that much for you, and 0:04:00.960 --> 0:04:02.160 you can laugh at the fact that I had to 0:04:02.160 --> 0:04:03.080 do it not once but twice. 0:04:03.200 --> 0:04:08.200 Oh, that's a really nice reminder. Yeah, and also helps 0:04:08.240 --> 0:04:10.760 to laugh, it does. Yeah, And as soon as you 0:04:10.880 --> 0:04:15.000 start talking people around you will help you laugh and 0:04:15.200 --> 0:04:17.039 see the funny side, even when there is in a 0:04:17.040 --> 0:04:17.600 funny side. 0:04:17.640 --> 0:04:19.680 You make one. Yeah, you like the fact that you 0:04:19.720 --> 0:04:21.320 had to do it twice in a few days. 0:04:21.080 --> 0:04:26.159 Exactly exactly over to the peak though, Oh god, it's 0:04:26.200 --> 0:04:31.479 a cute one. So Rue started ballet, Oh. 0:04:31.520 --> 0:04:35.600 We need to put up some content. She has the proper. 0:04:36.160 --> 0:04:39.520 Little beautiful She does shout out to Tals her gorgeous 0:04:39.560 --> 0:04:44.400 auntie who's a massive shitter Fana pot. She let us 0:04:44.400 --> 0:04:47.520 borrow ours. She's like, oh, yeah, I have like Ava's stuff. 0:04:47.920 --> 0:04:49.960 I tried it on and I was like crying, obviously 0:04:50.040 --> 0:04:53.120 put it on her crying, but not only that, it 0:04:53.240 --> 0:04:55.560 was like, you know, I put her hair back into 0:04:55.600 --> 0:04:58.400 a little ballerie like a little girl, and I said, 0:04:58.520 --> 0:04:59.840 she doesn't look like a told laugh. 0:05:00.080 --> 0:05:00.320 Oh. 0:05:00.360 --> 0:05:03.040 I did this video of her and I said, okay, darling, 0:05:03.360 --> 0:05:06.160 you excited for ballet? And she says yes, and then 0:05:06.200 --> 0:05:08.960 I'm like, okay, on your tippy toes, arms up in 0:05:09.000 --> 0:05:12.800 the air, okay, now turn around and she's just so excited. 0:05:13.520 --> 0:05:15.720 And then the other cute thing about it was like, 0:05:15.760 --> 0:05:18.520 because I'm pregnant, I get a free fucking cart, don't 0:05:18.520 --> 0:05:18.880 I so. 0:05:18.880 --> 0:05:22.960 I didn't have to parents and the Zaddy content, Yeah, 0:05:23.040 --> 0:05:25.160 Charlie was it's so sexist. I was saying this to 0:05:25.240 --> 0:05:31.480 key off air, awkward shout out Charlie listening, it's so sexist. 0:05:31.480 --> 0:05:34.240 But why is dad's dancing with their daughters the hottest 0:05:34.240 --> 0:05:35.080 fucking thing ever? 0:05:35.800 --> 0:05:39.240 Like it's so cute, Like you know, I said, after 0:05:39.279 --> 0:05:42.680 this pregnancy, Lauren, I'm like, I don't one after watch 0:05:42.680 --> 0:05:45.599 from you exactly, my overaries were like, oh yeah, can 0:05:45.640 --> 0:05:49.880 I ask because this all happened while I was away. Yeah, 0:05:50.080 --> 0:05:51.720 like her first class and I didn't even know she 0:05:51.800 --> 0:05:52.320 was doing it. 0:05:53.000 --> 0:05:53.760 Why ballet? 0:05:54.000 --> 0:05:57.640 Ballet is problematic af and I hate ballet, So why 0:05:58.200 --> 0:05:59.039 the little. 0:05:59.320 --> 0:06:02.080 Stuff is like gymnastics is the other thing I want 0:06:02.080 --> 0:06:03.880 to put around, But I know that's super problematic. 0:06:04.200 --> 0:06:04.520 For me. 0:06:05.080 --> 0:06:07.640 As a kid, I loved dancing. It was like my 0:06:07.720 --> 0:06:10.760 biggest passion and I never got to do ballet and 0:06:10.800 --> 0:06:13.599 I always wanted to. So it's a little bit of me. 0:06:13.960 --> 0:06:17.200 My sister put my niece in dance because of the 0:06:17.240 --> 0:06:19.000 exact same reason, because she was like, I always wanted 0:06:19.000 --> 0:06:19.559 to be a dancer. 0:06:19.720 --> 0:06:21.440 Yeah, Evelyn laugh did two classes. 0:06:21.520 --> 0:06:23.400 Well, this is the thing. I got this from my 0:06:23.480 --> 0:06:26.279 friends who have older kids. It's like each term they 0:06:26.360 --> 0:06:32.840 let their kids choose like an activity. 0:06:29.320 --> 0:06:33.880 To get them involved in something, yeah, figure out what 0:06:33.920 --> 0:06:36.440 they like and also exactly makes it way more for 0:06:36.640 --> 0:06:38.320 when people say that their kids are doing like ten 0:06:38.360 --> 0:06:40.120 different activities. I'm like, firstly, how do you have the 0:06:40.120 --> 0:06:41.839 time you can afford that? 0:06:42.120 --> 0:06:43.720 I know, And it's like I think, al, we still 0:06:43.760 --> 0:06:45.719 don't know how much it's costless. Lady is not writing 0:06:45.760 --> 0:06:47.600 back to me, and I just keep showing up two 0:06:47.640 --> 0:06:50.600 classes and I'm like, I will pay, but like, yeah, 0:06:50.640 --> 0:06:53.000 tell me what to do. I think it's like, well, 0:06:53.040 --> 0:06:54.599 I think it's a you sign up for a term. 0:06:54.680 --> 0:06:56.760 So most activity is like two hundred and fifty dollars 0:06:56.800 --> 0:07:00.000 a term, which is not cheap. But that's why I'm 0:07:00.000 --> 0:07:02.200 okay with her doing one. But at the end of it, 0:07:02.240 --> 0:07:05.159 I'll be like, hey, do you want to do ballet again, 0:07:05.600 --> 0:07:09.720 or do we want to try gymnastics or whatever, And 0:07:09.760 --> 0:07:11.840 then my god, you could join Nny's Little Kids team 0:07:11.960 --> 0:07:14.600 exactly exactly, and I will have her do something like 0:07:14.920 --> 0:07:17.360 that for sure. It was just like every Saturday we'll 0:07:17.360 --> 0:07:19.520 be walking down like the main street in our suburb 0:07:19.600 --> 0:07:21.960 and all these little baby ballerinas will be running around, 0:07:21.960 --> 0:07:24.200 and Charlie and I were just like, I mean, it's 0:07:24.200 --> 0:07:27.440 within walking distance as well. But also we like selfishly 0:07:27.480 --> 0:07:30.760 wanted a bit more structure to our weekends. 0:07:31.000 --> 0:07:33.840 Like we're just not selfish. I can't relate. 0:07:34.240 --> 0:07:36.360 We're not big planners. We kind of go with the 0:07:36.400 --> 0:07:38.680 flow and we're always like, oh shit, the weekends kind 0:07:38.680 --> 0:07:41.600 of got away from us. So we thought having like 0:07:41.640 --> 0:07:44.480 an activity that our kind of saturday's built around as well. 0:07:44.520 --> 0:07:46.120 Has been really nice for us. 0:07:46.400 --> 0:07:48.760 That is so cute though. Yeah, it was. 0:07:48.760 --> 0:07:53.040 Really nice just seeing her like walk in and be 0:07:53.160 --> 0:07:54.080 really nervous. 0:07:54.360 --> 0:07:56.400 It's also just so nue that you both take her. 0:07:56.560 --> 0:07:58.800 I know, well it's just mums that take them, like, 0:07:59.080 --> 0:08:01.480 but Charlie and I had it's like so go dependent. 0:08:01.560 --> 0:08:03.160 We do everything together. I don't know if it's a 0:08:03.160 --> 0:08:03.720 good or bad thing. 0:08:03.760 --> 0:08:06.200 Anyway, I feel like it's got its pros and cons. 0:08:06.360 --> 0:08:09.360 Yeah, yeah, we just love doing stuff together, especially with her. 0:08:09.720 --> 0:08:12.000 Whereas I have not gone to Little Kickers once. 0:08:12.280 --> 0:08:13.920 Yeah, but that's all right, don't you. 0:08:13.960 --> 0:08:16.440 No, No, I said to Luke, I will not be going. 0:08:16.840 --> 0:08:17.800 I don't enjoy it. 0:08:17.800 --> 0:08:19.600 I don't want to see him do it just once. 0:08:19.680 --> 0:08:21.440 I see him kick the ball all the time. 0:08:21.560 --> 0:08:23.640 Yeah, I know. But what I really liked was like 0:08:23.680 --> 0:08:27.840 seeing her come in, like assessing everything, like looking at 0:08:27.880 --> 0:08:31.040 the other girls, like meeting Miss Molly and like and 0:08:31.200 --> 0:08:33.760 just seeing her interact in a space, like I know 0:08:33.800 --> 0:08:37.280 that she's a really kind kid, but like Miss Molly's like, 0:08:37.320 --> 0:08:37.640 can you. 0:08:37.559 --> 0:08:38.800 Pick up the little because. 0:08:38.559 --> 0:08:40.280 I have these little dots on the ground that like 0:08:40.559 --> 0:08:42.400 make them stand in one place kind of thing to 0:08:42.480 --> 0:08:44.720 listen to her and then Rue like picks them all 0:08:44.800 --> 0:08:46.480 up for Miss Molly and gives them to her. And 0:08:47.040 --> 0:08:50.080 then by the end of the first class, she'd kind 0:08:50.120 --> 0:08:52.079 of found her feet a little bit, she was a 0:08:52.120 --> 0:08:54.440 bit more comfortable. So then she really started to like 0:08:54.520 --> 0:08:56.600 open up and get into the dance class. 0:08:56.960 --> 0:08:58.200 So she loves to dance. 0:08:58.320 --> 0:09:01.080 She loves to dance. So I just love seeing her 0:09:01.280 --> 0:09:03.760 in like a new environment of finding her confidence and 0:09:03.760 --> 0:09:05.880 then just like loving it, like that's a bit I 0:09:05.920 --> 0:09:06.559 really enjoy. 0:09:06.600 --> 0:09:08.960 And then on we best thing when you see them, Yeah, 0:09:09.080 --> 0:09:10.200 loving something so much. 0:09:10.280 --> 0:09:12.960 And Miss Molly did comment that she has quite good rhythm, 0:09:13.120 --> 0:09:15.520 and I was like, oh, that's definitely from me. I'm 0:09:16.280 --> 0:09:16.600 a dune. 0:09:16.720 --> 0:09:18.920 So you said, you've said Charlie has good rhythm too. 0:09:19.080 --> 0:09:23.079 Yeah, but he doesn't have like ballet rhythm like on time, Like. 0:09:23.640 --> 0:09:27.920 That's me, I reckon, I'd probably have ballet rhythm. 0:09:28.040 --> 0:09:32.240 Yeah. Should we move on to the topic for today, yes? Please. 0:09:37.040 --> 0:09:40.679 So I have fired my obstetrician and I have also 0:09:40.720 --> 0:09:44.320 fired my dula. Wait wait what Yeah, I didn't know 0:09:44.320 --> 0:09:47.000 about the duela. Oh yeah, double whammy. I'm no longer 0:09:47.040 --> 0:09:48.960 going to deliver my baby privately. 0:09:49.400 --> 0:09:52.120 Oh she's joining us on the public side. I am 0:09:52.400 --> 0:09:55.200 a welcome, thank you so much. It's a lot cheaper. 0:09:55.360 --> 0:09:57.640 It is a lot cheaper, although I have hired a 0:09:57.760 --> 0:10:01.920 private midwife oh okay, which in New South Wales it 0:10:02.000 --> 0:10:05.760 is pretty much the cost of an obstetrician animated seven 0:10:06.200 --> 0:10:09.120 but you get about maybe fifteen hundred back from Medicare. 0:10:09.280 --> 0:10:11.800 Maybe maybe it like varies based on how much money 0:10:11.840 --> 0:10:12.360 you're spent. 0:10:12.200 --> 0:10:15.600 With many that just absolutely blows my mind and will 0:10:15.720 --> 0:10:19.480 for anyone else that birthed publicly. Yes, not one dollar. 0:10:19.600 --> 0:10:21.960 Oh sorry, I lie. There was two tests that I 0:10:21.960 --> 0:10:22.600 paid to take. 0:10:22.480 --> 0:10:24.840 To Patrea tests and to be fair, like after I 0:10:24.840 --> 0:10:30.120 have my little incident impacted. When I did that, it 0:10:30.240 --> 0:10:31.640 was like a bit of a because I was in 0:10:31.679 --> 0:10:33.720 a bit of a weird spot with my obstetrician. She 0:10:33.760 --> 0:10:36.120 was trying to make me deliver in a different public hospital. 0:10:36.200 --> 0:10:38.040 Well, explain why you fired your. 0:10:38.000 --> 0:10:39.640 Obs Okay, yeah, I should probably start. 0:10:39.679 --> 0:10:41.079 I'm going to get real comfy for this. 0:10:42.440 --> 0:10:44.240 I mean, as with a lot of people like you 0:10:44.280 --> 0:10:46.360 either go private or public right, and I think you're 0:10:46.559 --> 0:10:48.880 mainly influenced by what you. 0:10:48.760 --> 0:10:51.160 Can afford and what your health cover is and what 0:10:51.200 --> 0:10:51.680 your friends have. 0:10:51.760 --> 0:10:54.920 Done exactly, and ninety nine percent of my girlfriends went 0:10:55.280 --> 0:10:58.719 private and I did two FARU. But we've also been 0:10:58.760 --> 0:11:02.640 paying for like gold hospital cover oh my three years. 0:11:02.880 --> 0:11:04.880 So you know, you get pregnant again and you're like, well, 0:11:04.880 --> 0:11:08.880 we're fucking using. We've been paying like you know, something crazy. 0:11:08.960 --> 0:11:11.600 I've got brons and always winged about not getting anything back. 0:11:11.760 --> 0:11:13.680 Well, with this pregnancy, I just found myself at like 0:11:13.679 --> 0:11:17.400 a real crossroad. So before we left to go to Europe, 0:11:17.520 --> 0:11:22.160 we had our last meeting with the obstetrician, who we. 0:11:22.000 --> 0:11:25.040 Need to clarify Key was obsessed with, well. 0:11:24.840 --> 0:11:27.520 Okay, this is what happened, right. So my original obstetrician 0:11:27.600 --> 0:11:30.080 I really loved. I called her up when I got 0:11:30.080 --> 0:11:32.559 pregnant with this baby and I was like, hey, Sue, 0:11:33.320 --> 0:11:36.400 I'm back, and she was like, sorry, I'm not actually 0:11:36.400 --> 0:11:38.800 doing obstetrics anymore. And I couldn't even be mad at 0:11:38.840 --> 0:11:42.800 her because she's like helping her cancer patients, like she's 0:11:42.840 --> 0:11:45.040 the saying, really, can't be mad, no, No. I was like, okay, well, 0:11:45.040 --> 0:11:47.959 you're doing God's work. So I said, hey, can you 0:11:48.000 --> 0:11:49.720 give me a couple of recos? She gave me a 0:11:49.760 --> 0:11:53.120 guy and a girl, I prefer to go to a 0:11:53.160 --> 0:11:56.960 female for guyiny obsetrics, that kind of thing. So I 0:11:57.040 --> 0:12:00.880 went with this obstetrician. She's also a woman of color. 0:12:01.000 --> 0:12:04.040 Like I know that wouldn't mean anything to anyone else, 0:12:04.120 --> 0:12:06.800 but I did quite like the idea of it not 0:12:06.840 --> 0:12:08.240 being like a white doctor. 0:12:08.440 --> 0:12:09.680 Oh my gosh, it's just. 0:12:09.520 --> 0:12:12.960 Just like something a little bit different. And I called 0:12:12.960 --> 0:12:15.400 and booked in with her, and she was really lovely. 0:12:15.840 --> 0:12:18.640 And this is the thing. She isn't a bad person, 0:12:19.000 --> 0:12:21.040 but what I came to realize is that she is 0:12:21.120 --> 0:12:24.920 a trained surgeon. Yes, So with this doctor, I wanted 0:12:24.960 --> 0:12:27.200 to deliver at the same hospital. When I went in, 0:12:27.280 --> 0:12:28.800 I said, are you okay with me doing. 0:12:28.600 --> 0:12:31.199 A v back, because let's do a TLDR of your 0:12:31.200 --> 0:12:32.040 birth with Rue. 0:12:32.120 --> 0:12:34.720 So with Rue, I went into spontaneous labor. 0:12:35.000 --> 0:12:39.240 The plan was vaginal birth with any assistance needed. 0:12:39.440 --> 0:12:42.000 Basically yeah, I was like, I'll try and do it without, 0:12:42.040 --> 0:12:44.120 but I'm not opposed to getting it. I got everything. 0:12:45.320 --> 0:12:49.600 I started contracting bang on thirty nine weeks in Cada, 0:12:49.880 --> 0:12:53.439 in Cama, after what I thought was my water's breaking. 0:12:53.559 --> 0:12:56.440 I now know that they hadn't broken, but at that 0:12:56.559 --> 0:12:58.240 time I thought they had It was like five am. 0:12:58.880 --> 0:13:02.560 I called the hospital in private. They have lots of 0:13:02.720 --> 0:13:04.959 kind of procedures, so if your waters break, they want 0:13:05.000 --> 0:13:07.199 you to come in to check that they have broken. 0:13:07.400 --> 0:13:08.160 Oh really it. 0:13:08.080 --> 0:13:10.000 Is, and they got to send you back home if 0:13:10.000 --> 0:13:10.640 you're not. Yeah. 0:13:10.760 --> 0:13:12.360 Yeah, but they were like, yeah, your waters are broken, 0:13:12.480 --> 0:13:16.600 so go home and labor. So we went home. And 0:13:16.720 --> 0:13:19.680 this was my favorite part about Rue's birth, like was 0:13:19.760 --> 0:13:23.800 laboring at home. It was so much fun. We played scrabble, weirdo. 0:13:24.679 --> 0:13:25.920 I was bouncing on the ball. 0:13:26.200 --> 0:13:28.480 It's my favorite part of birth. What do you mean 0:13:28.520 --> 0:13:29.360 were you not in pain? 0:13:30.080 --> 0:13:32.520 I was, but it was very manageable, So this is like, okay, 0:13:32.720 --> 0:13:34.880 and how far are they away? As soon as I 0:13:34.920 --> 0:13:36.640 got closer together and fired up, that was when I 0:13:36.679 --> 0:13:38.360 was like, we've got to go to the hospital. But 0:13:38.400 --> 0:13:41.080 this was like I can't remember the but you had 0:13:41.120 --> 0:13:43.280 a period of time where they weren't that intense, and 0:13:43.320 --> 0:13:46.520 they weren't because there was only half an hour where 0:13:46.520 --> 0:13:48.719 they were manageable, but they were still less than five 0:13:48.760 --> 0:13:52.400 minutes apart, and then they went to under three minutes apart. Yeah. See, 0:13:52.400 --> 0:13:54.880 I think my labor was a lot slower. I'm anticipating 0:13:54.960 --> 0:13:57.719 having a long labor with this baby too, or. 0:13:58.360 --> 0:14:00.360 You could do what my friend Camilla has done and 0:14:00.440 --> 0:14:01.760 just shoot it out. 0:14:01.840 --> 0:14:03.680 I mean, I'd love that too. I'd love any type 0:14:03.720 --> 0:14:06.720 of flavor. But yeah, we were playing scrabble. He was 0:14:06.720 --> 0:14:09.280 making me egg salad sandwiches, which was my craving for 0:14:09.320 --> 0:14:11.440 that one. We were like bouncing on the ball. Had 0:14:11.440 --> 0:14:14.440 the tens machine, Like it was just really beautiful. What 0:14:14.480 --> 0:14:17.080 does a tens machine do? It just basically gives you 0:14:17.160 --> 0:14:19.160 like little electric shocks that. 0:14:19.160 --> 0:14:21.880 Kind of like is that that you get from a trampoline. 0:14:21.600 --> 0:14:24.680 Kind of and you can intensify it or lower it 0:14:24.800 --> 0:14:26.720 based on like where you are, and like does it 0:14:26.800 --> 0:14:29.040 hell labor, Yeah, it does. It just kind of like 0:14:29.840 --> 0:14:31.920 takes your mind off it. It helps you a certain extent. 0:14:31.960 --> 0:14:35.000 Anyway, I wonder if we should get one for needles, Yeah, 0:14:35.040 --> 0:14:36.680 you could try it, or even. 0:14:36.480 --> 0:14:38.920 Like a hand con. You know a lot of people 0:14:38.920 --> 0:14:39.520 do that and labor. 0:14:39.560 --> 0:14:42.440 I bite my hand generally when I'm getting a needle, 0:14:42.440 --> 0:14:43.520 but that doesn't we. 0:14:43.480 --> 0:14:45.440 Could probably not let you bite your hand and get 0:14:45.440 --> 0:14:47.000 you maybe just a hand comb that you can just 0:14:47.040 --> 0:14:50.560 push into your palm. Let's look into that first, So 0:14:50.680 --> 0:14:56.200 about nine pm, I'm like, whoof all day? I reckon, 0:14:56.240 --> 0:15:00.840 we're ready to go here. So we go in and yeah, 0:15:00.880 --> 0:15:02.960 it was like three centimeters. At this point, I was 0:15:03.000 --> 0:15:05.640 like fuck the hypno birthding told me not to ask 0:15:05.680 --> 0:15:08.280 how well it was progressive. Yeah, They're like, you don't 0:15:08.280 --> 0:15:10.960 want to know, like kind of thing, because if you 0:15:11.320 --> 0:15:13.560 someone says three centimeters, you're like, I've got to get 0:15:13.600 --> 0:15:13.960 to ten. 0:15:14.280 --> 0:15:16.760 Yeah, you're going, well, how long you can actually go 0:15:16.920 --> 0:15:18.480 from three to ten very quickly? 0:15:18.720 --> 0:15:21.200 You can, And that what I've learned since then is 0:15:21.240 --> 0:15:24.720 like how much of dilator is not necessarily like indicative 0:15:24.720 --> 0:15:27.240 of like how far through labor you are progressing. You 0:15:27.280 --> 0:15:31.360 can be more progressed than you are dilated anyway. So 0:15:31.480 --> 0:15:33.600 they're like, would you want to go back home? And 0:15:33.640 --> 0:15:36.240 I was like, well, yeah, I'm not going to like 0:15:36.480 --> 0:15:38.280 check in now. But they were like, okay, well, because 0:15:38.280 --> 0:15:42.160 your waters are broken this morning, like if you aren't progressing, 0:15:42.280 --> 0:15:44.800 we have to induce you after twenty four hours because 0:15:44.800 --> 0:15:47.280 that's a procedure for risk of infection. YadA, YadA, dada. 0:15:47.760 --> 0:15:49.680 Went home. I lasted until midnight and I was like, 0:15:49.760 --> 0:15:52.160 I need fucking something. So we went back in had 0:15:52.160 --> 0:15:55.200 the morphine, and then the next day was like intervention 0:15:55.280 --> 0:15:58.160 after intervention, so it was like I was on the 0:15:58.240 --> 0:16:01.440 trips to induce me. I had then said, well, I 0:16:01.480 --> 0:16:05.560 need the epidural then, because this is incredible pain. Mid afternoon, 0:16:05.600 --> 0:16:07.960 my midwife realized that my waters hadn't broken. 0:16:08.120 --> 0:16:10.000 Did no one check? I thought they did. 0:16:10.080 --> 0:16:12.280 They did at the start, but not properly. They just 0:16:12.360 --> 0:16:14.520 checked the fluid and my undies to make sure that 0:16:14.560 --> 0:16:17.520 it was clear basically and not something bad. And I'm like, 0:16:17.560 --> 0:16:20.080 I wish someone had have checked me because they were 0:16:20.080 --> 0:16:23.560 starting interventions that were causing me to be in labor 0:16:23.960 --> 0:16:26.320 but not having my waters broken. They were kind of 0:16:26.360 --> 0:16:28.840 like working against each other in a way, like my 0:16:28.960 --> 0:16:31.600 midwife has said since then, like if you were going 0:16:31.640 --> 0:16:33.480 to give you one intervention, we want to give it 0:16:33.560 --> 0:16:36.920 all to you. So everything's kind of working together. So 0:16:37.040 --> 0:16:40.000 that midwife then broke my waters, and then. 0:16:40.400 --> 0:16:45.000 My smell I don't remember at all. I just like 0:16:45.120 --> 0:16:47.240 poo because Lenny had shit. 0:16:47.080 --> 0:16:48.560 In the Actually there was a little bit of poo 0:16:48.560 --> 0:16:51.240 in there. They weren't concerned, though Charlie reminded me of 0:16:51.280 --> 0:16:56.160 that the other day anyway, So I'm like exhausted by 0:16:56.160 --> 0:16:58.920 this time. It ends up being like the obstruction comes 0:16:58.920 --> 0:17:01.640 in and she's like, hey, you're doing really well, but 0:17:02.800 --> 0:17:03.520 it's been a while. 0:17:03.560 --> 0:17:07.000 Now how many hours at that point since it's been 0:17:07.200 --> 0:17:08.760 like gone out a contraction. 0:17:09.240 --> 0:17:14.040 It was like thirty five hours maybe, And she was like, 0:17:15.040 --> 0:17:16.800 let's go for a few more hours, but then I'm 0:17:16.800 --> 0:17:18.520 gonna come back and we're gonna have to have a conversation. 0:17:18.560 --> 0:17:20.320 And I was like, okay, she's gonna say let's have 0:17:20.320 --> 0:17:23.960 a sea section. So the epidural just I felt like 0:17:24.000 --> 0:17:26.399 it was not working. I could feel fucking everything and 0:17:26.480 --> 0:17:28.520 I couldn't move, and I was just like, this is 0:17:28.560 --> 0:17:31.240 so shit. By the time she came back and she 0:17:31.720 --> 0:17:35.320 raised the sea section, I was like, yeah, and I. 0:17:35.400 --> 0:17:37.879 Was feeling I didn't realize you still got a choice, 0:17:37.880 --> 0:17:39.640 though you always have a choice. 0:17:40.280 --> 0:17:42.600 Yeah, But she came back and said, this is what 0:17:42.640 --> 0:17:44.240 I think we should do. And by this time. 0:17:44.320 --> 0:17:46.800 It wasn't like we're racing you in type thing. 0:17:47.119 --> 0:17:47.280 No. 0:17:47.359 --> 0:17:50.520 I mean it's called an emergency success because it wasn't planned. 0:17:50.560 --> 0:17:54.320 But yeah, Ru's heart rate was always stable. It was 0:17:54.520 --> 0:17:57.480 very chilled. That's why I don't have a lot of 0:17:57.520 --> 0:17:59.920 trauma or any trauma at all around Ruy's birth, because 0:18:00.000 --> 0:18:02.439 I felt like I was really in control, yeah, the 0:18:02.480 --> 0:18:04.160