Speaker 1: You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast.
Speaker 2: Mamma Mere acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters
Speaker 2: that this podcast is recorded on Hello and welcome to
Speaker 2: Mama Mia out Loud and to our Friday show where
Speaker 2: we take a deliberate step back from the news Today. Friends,
Speaker 2: It's Friday, the twenty first of June.
Speaker 1: I'm Hollywayne, right, I'm Me Friedman.
Speaker 3: And I'm in Vernon filling in for Jesse today. Last one.
Speaker 3: Can't wait for her to come back. I'm tired of
Speaker 3: talking to you guys.
Speaker 1: Oh you need more days off? I get the flu again.
Speaker 2: We'll just sign off on it before we get started
Speaker 2: on the show today. And what was your favorite conversation
Speaker 2: from the Spill this week?
Speaker 3: My favorite conversation from the Spill this week is probably
Speaker 3: earlier in the week. We talked about Nikola cock When
Speaker 3: did you see her Skims campaign?
Speaker 4: Yes?
Speaker 5: I did.
Speaker 3: We talked about that as well as the entire big
Speaker 3: brand machine of Skims in general, and we also talked
Speaker 3: about Armie Hammer's return in the wood again.
Speaker 5: Yeah, he lit a bit of you know what's funny
Speaker 5: about Nicola Coglan, who we talked about on Monday's show.
Speaker 5: I was thinking that the difference in the way she's
Speaker 5: being portrayed, even in this Skins campaign, it's through the
Speaker 5: male gaze, which you know, I don't usually like when
Speaker 5: you are subverting beauty standards and the beauty standards that
Speaker 5: tend to be very limited as she is.
Speaker 1: I actually think that's what makes it refreshing.
Speaker 3: I don't even think of that. Yeah, but she did
Speaker 3: look stunning in the loundre that body Congress.
Speaker 1: I bought it.
Speaker 2: She looked, did you buy it?
Speaker 3: Well, I'm on the wait list.
Speaker 2: Did Nichola Cocklin make you buy it?
Speaker 1: Holly who was on Mid this Week?
Speaker 2: Look on Mid this Week we had a conversation about death. Yes,
Speaker 2: there you go, just throwing it out there, the messages
Speaker 2: I've got this week about this episode. So we had
Speaker 2: doctor Jackie Bailey on. She is an interfaith minister, a
Speaker 2: funeral celebrant, and what's called.
Speaker 1: A death walker is that like a death dueler.
Speaker 2: It's kind of like a death dueler. They walk with
Speaker 2: the dying and also the dying people's people. And the
Speaker 2: other thing that's amazing about Jackie is that she herself
Speaker 2: has had a lot of loss in her life, so
Speaker 2: she just has this really very empathetic but very no
Speaker 2: bullshit attitude to it. And so we have this conversation
Speaker 2: that you might imagine would be really heavy and sad,
Speaker 2: and of course it's serious, but the way that she
Speaker 2: can talk about it, she finds some lightness, she finds
Speaker 2: some really practical stuff. And I've had messages from people
Speaker 2: who I know have suffered really really serious losses who
Speaker 2: just said it has helped them enormously. So it is
Speaker 2: one to share doing good work with anyone needs who
Speaker 2: is suffering from grief at the moment. What about no filter?
Speaker 5: You know how I've been banging on about the seven
Speaker 5: different types of rest everyone needs, and.
Speaker 1: I've been making you all talk about it.
Speaker 5: I finally tracked down the person who came up with
Speaker 5: the concept. She's a doctor, doctor Sondra Dalton Smith, and
Speaker 5: she talked about what the seven different.
Speaker 1: Types of rest are.
Speaker 5: She talked about how we burn energy in those seven
Speaker 5: different ways mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, socially and creatively.
Speaker 1: Oh there's one more.
Speaker 5: What kinds of things restore our energy? Like what rest
Speaker 5: looks like because it's not just about stopping doing something
Speaker 5: or if you're physically tired, then obviously you need to
Speaker 5: stop running a marathon and have a sleep or get
Speaker 5: more sleep, but all the other areas, sometimes it can
Speaker 5: be starting to do something that can make you feel
Speaker 5: more rested.
Speaker 1: So it's such an interesting conversation.
Speaker 5: We'll put links to all of our other shows and
Speaker 5: those episodes in the show notes.
Speaker 2: But on today's show, are you looking for a man
Speaker 2: in finance? Six foot five blue eyes? If you don't
Speaker 2: know what I'm talking about, you will in a minute.
Speaker 2: Also a movie that's way more than a movie, a
Speaker 2: TV show with lots of sex that isn't bridgeton and
Speaker 2: an airworm banger of a song. And My time as
Speaker 2: a boomer? Why mea is counting down until Sunday and
Speaker 2: that time and bumped.
Speaker 1: Into three x's in one night.
Speaker 2: Welcome to best and Worst, But first, Mere Friedman.
Speaker 5: In case you missed it, there's a name for that
Speaker 5: thing that some of us do, which is sending your
Speaker 5: friends or family popping in the group chat memes, funny
Speaker 5: videos or links, and it's called pebbling. The term pebbling
Speaker 5: comes from penguins, because did you know that penguins will
Speaker 5: gift pebbles to potential.
Speaker 2: Mates and that from good Luck Chust. Yeah.
Speaker 5: I follow Adam Grant on Instagram and he's like a productivity, emotional,
Speaker 5: psychological person and.
Speaker 1: He posted about it.
Speaker 5: He's a science author as well, and he says pebbling
Speaker 5: is an act of care and every pebble is a
Speaker 5: bid for connection. And to me this was an absolute
Speaker 5: lightning bolt because that is how I show care. It's
Speaker 5: very different to when you post something on social because
Speaker 5: I don't think that's a bid well. I guess it's
Speaker 5: a bid for some kind of connection. But that can
Speaker 5: be about virtue signaling, it can be about attention seeking.
Speaker 5: It's not always a negative thing, of course posting. It
Speaker 5: can be about self expression, self expression, self promotion, all
Speaker 5: different things. But when you put little things in group chats,
Speaker 5: that is a bid for connection. And I know that
Speaker 5: I've got some group chats or friends that I send
Speaker 5: things to as a bid for connection and they don't
Speaker 5: get the message and it just lands, and so my
Speaker 5: little pebble sits there pop another little pebble.
Speaker 2: This is another one of those conversations with having a
Speaker 2: go at me about my inactivity in group chats.
Speaker 5: Oh it's you, No, it's one hundred percent not Holly.
Speaker 5: It's a thousand percent not Holly. It's because Hole and
Speaker 5: I and Jesse and I and my closest girlfriends not
Speaker 5: actually not all of my close girlfriends, a lot of
Speaker 5: my girlfriends. We do have that pebbling. That's how we
Speaker 5: kind of stay connected. But then I've got other people
Speaker 5: who just I'll pop a pebble and it's not that
Speaker 5: we don't talk about things, but they won't then.
Speaker 1: Reciprocate with a pebble of their own, or a.
Speaker 5: Comment or a thumbs up or an opinion about the
Speaker 5: pebble that I've left.
Speaker 3: Maybe you're pebbling wrong.
Speaker 1: It's like they left my pebble and red definite left.
Speaker 2: Pebble on red.
Speaker 3: Because I think that's two ways of pebbles. So you
Speaker 3: pebble by like sending memes and stuff that you think
Speaker 3: are funny. But I don't like those pebbles. I want
Speaker 3: them to send me stuff that they know I think
Speaker 3: will be funny.
Speaker 2: That's the idea, though, that's the right idea, right, No,
Speaker 2: But sometimes you.
Speaker 3: Get pebbles from people who they're like, I saw this
Speaker 3: funny thing, you must like it too, But I'm like, no,
Speaker 3: I want my pebbles.
Speaker 1: To be so that means just that they don't know you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I want the pebbles to be like something
Speaker 3: that you've listened to what I said, Oh, I reminded
Speaker 3: you of something, and it's so specific, like and they
Speaker 3: need to be really specific to me.
Speaker 5: You want a very tailored, customized bid for connection.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I feel like those pebbles are like being flung at
Speaker 2: my face and.
Speaker 1: It's likely doesn't like it.
Speaker 2: It's like a demand for all the time. You're like,
Speaker 2: what if I don't have a minute.
Speaker 5: No, you don't have to necessarily react to that pebble
Speaker 5: in that moment or anything. But it's more just the
Speaker 5: general idea of pebbles and also whole our whole work
Speaker 5: is pebbles, Like that's our whole relationship is pebbles. So
Speaker 5: you are You've been defensive here and insecure, I think.
Speaker 2: But I'm also speaking for the people who don't like
Speaker 2: an interruption that group chats and things bring to their
Speaker 2: lives and that those people exist.
Speaker 1: I get it. No, No, I think that's fair enough.
Speaker 3: I'm just asking for a haha.
Speaker 2: Is it too much? Too hah? I need to play
Speaker 2: you all something. It is apparently one of the songs
Speaker 2: of the American summer. It all started with this young
Speaker 2: woman called Girl on Couch. And I know that people
Speaker 2: used to have names people. I know that people used
Speaker 2: to have real names. And indeed, Megan Bonnie is her
Speaker 2: real name, and she's a TikTok person. And a while
Speaker 2: ago she set the internet a challenge.
Speaker 4: Here it is, I'm looking for a man in finance
Speaker 4: trust fund six fire blue eyes finance trust fund six
Speaker 4: fire blue eyes, and looking for our man, and looking
Speaker 4: for our man, and looking for looking for looking for
Speaker 4: looking at fine out trust fune sixth five eyes.
Speaker 2: Quite like to trust.
Speaker 1: So she she just did that. See I would send
Speaker 1: that to someone of the pebbles. So she did that
Speaker 1: and would.
Speaker 2: And then she said, DJs, do your thing, have fun
Speaker 2: with it, and oh my god, did they ever. This
Speaker 2: is what happened. Here is a mashup of some of
Speaker 2: the remixes of Girl on Couch.
Speaker 4: I'm Looking for a Man in Finance Trust done six
Speaker 4: five blue eyes, fine uce trust fun six five blue Eyes.
Speaker 2: Some of the biggest DJs in the world, including David Genner,
Speaker 2: have remixed that song, played it at festivals, and now suddenly.
Speaker 1: It is huge. That's so funny.
Speaker 2: Now I'm interested in this. I agree, this is what
Speaker 2: it's for. I love what the internet's actually for. She
Speaker 2: missed out on a trademark, she really did, But I'm
Speaker 2: interested in this statement. I'm looking for a man in finance.
Speaker 2: Six ' five blue eyes, I just have fun things.
Speaker 2: Is very tall, very tall because because they can't see
Speaker 2: their faces, that's why so attractive. The thing is girl
Speaker 2: on couch in that statement is not alone. She is
Speaker 2: sort of echoing a message that's all over TikTok at
Speaker 2: the minute from a certain sort of dating influencer who
Speaker 2: sets up their stall as trying to catch you a
Speaker 2: rich man to marry. Right. This energy feels very unchanged
Speaker 2: to me from say like the ninety Sex in the
Speaker 2: City Charlotte, who was like, I'm looking.
Speaker 5: For a man in finance, and also Lady Featherington's looking
Speaker 5: for rich men for her daughters exactly.
Speaker 2: And it also feels part of an ongoing conversation that
Speaker 2: we've been having about what women want on certain times.
Speaker 2: On Monday, we talked about how in an ever more
Speaker 2: expensive world, young women have almost zero chance of being
Speaker 2: able to earn their way into financial security and or
Speaker 2: success by themselves. On Wednesday, we talked about daddy energy,
Speaker 2: this idea of women wanting a protective, manly man, and
Speaker 2: how that apparently the thing we want at the moment,
Speaker 2: apart from Rodents. That's another conversation. And then a while
Speaker 2: ago we unpacked a viral essay by a young woman
Speaker 2: who had written about her very deliberate choice to marry
Speaker 2: an older rich man and give up her own career.
Speaker 2: And there's something in the water and all over the internet.
Speaker 2: Would you like some of these dating influencers advice ask
Speaker 2: a man to show you his bank statements and pay
Speaker 2: slips before you'd get serious with him.
Speaker 3: No, I wouldn't ask the bank statements and pay slips,
Speaker 3: the receipts. I think that's too much. I would show
Speaker 3: them mine willingly. I think that's kind of fun and funny.
Speaker 3: But I wouldn't. I wouldn't ask them.
Speaker 1: But I'm looking for a man in finance.
Speaker 5: The subtext, of course, is that if he works in finance,
Speaker 5: he's rich, yes, or will become rich.
Speaker 3: I am embarrassed to admit that I am appealed by
Speaker 3: the idea of having a man who earns a lot
Speaker 3: more than I do.
Speaker 1: Did you say you're embarrassed by that?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Why?
Speaker 3: Because I think it makes me sound like that I
Speaker 3: can't dane myself as an individual, and I just want
Speaker 3: to give it to some man to do it for me.
Speaker 1: Why can't both things be true? They can't be true.
Speaker 5: Why can't you want someone who is rich along with
Speaker 5: other things? Presumably, but that doesn't mean that you don't
Speaker 5: necessarily want to work or become rich yourself, because.
Speaker 3: I think it just makes me sound so superficial is
Speaker 3: the word you look there?
Speaker 5: It is.
Speaker 3: I'm shallow. But since this has gone viral, I feel
Speaker 3: more open about talking about it because there's something when
Speaker 3: a woman and I've been following this TikToker for a
Speaker 3: long time. She's so beautiful, she's really funny, she's really smart,
Speaker 3: and I think when you see someone go and cash
Speaker 3: and I think when you see someone like admit to
Speaker 3: wanting to do something, especially when it comes to dating,
Speaker 3: Like if someone's like I want this type of man,
Speaker 3: you kind of think to yourself, maybe I should want
Speaker 3: this type of man as well.
Speaker 5: But what are we talking about? This type of man?
Speaker 5: It's a type of Yeah, so let's just give a comparison.
Speaker 5: So if a guy did a TikTok I'm looking for
Speaker 5: a supermodel six foot.
Speaker 2: He might be saying I'm looking for a woman in
Speaker 2: finance six foot, blue eyes.
Speaker 1: You're absolutely right, blue eyes. Would we hate that? Would
Speaker 1: we say that superficial? Probably we would. But what's to say.
Speaker 5: They can't also be smart, funny, someone you're in love with.
Speaker 5: What's to say you can't also have a love match
Speaker 5: with the person who is rich. I've been watching a
Speaker 5: lot of Bridgeston.
Speaker 2: The thing is about this is that by putting man
Speaker 2: in finance, which is code, it's code for a couple
Speaker 2: of things. It's obviously code for lots of money, but
Speaker 2: it's also code for it is a particular works in finance,
Speaker 2: who wears the sharp suit? Who is the guy who
Speaker 2: works in finance?
Speaker 5: Right?
Speaker 2: I totally understand what she means when she says.
Speaker 5: That you're not horny for a guy in finance. If
Speaker 5: I have a dated one, Oh my god. No.
Speaker 2: The The reason why M feels shallow by saying that
Speaker 2: is if you are looking for a live partner and
Speaker 2: money is at the top of the list, that is shallow. Unquestionably,
Speaker 2: I think.
Speaker 1: It's not as simplistic or black and white as that.
Speaker 5: I think that if you look at the idea of
Speaker 5: financial security as opposed to I'm looking for a guy
Speaker 5: with a drug problem.
Speaker 2: But that's not fair because you're setting the world up
Speaker 2: as if there are rich guys and there are losers,
Speaker 2: and there is a whole massive spectrum.
Speaker 1: No, no, I agree. I agree.
Speaker 5: And what you're saying is that if they're her top
Speaker 5: three qualities that she's looking for.
Speaker 2: And I know this is a joke, but when you're
Speaker 2: as like it's in the water.
Speaker 5: This is in the water, right, Whereas Jesse has talked
Speaker 5: a lot of times on the show about how she
Speaker 5: made a list when she'd had a lot of relationships
Speaker 5: and I can't remember the actual order, but on it
Speaker 5: was funny, likes dogs, smart, I think was on there
Speaker 5: kind kind and she said that's what she found in
Speaker 5: her now husband. I think that what we're looking at
Speaker 5: is a romanticizing of being taken care of.
Speaker 2: Yes, one hundred percent.
Speaker 1: So it's like, has feminism gone too far?
Speaker 5: Has it made women fantasize about not having to lean
Speaker 5: in and being a lady boss actually being able to
Speaker 5: be a trad wife Because we've seen this fetishization of
Speaker 5: the trad wife rise up online as well, and everyone
Speaker 5: watching this content, oh my dream is to be a
Speaker 5: trad wife, and they've made it look so sexy and lovely.
Speaker 5: Is it all just a reaction to we've made so
Speaker 5: many strides, but now we feel like we're doing two
Speaker 5: jobs one hundred percent?
Speaker 1: It is that.
Speaker 2: So I think that this is very much part of
Speaker 2: the whole trad wife, soft girl, soft life thing. Is
Speaker 2: that it is really really hard to be financially independent.
Speaker 2: It's really hard to support a family, it's really hard
Speaker 2: to be paying the mortgage by yourself. All those things
Speaker 2: are really hard, right, and a lot of us have
Speaker 2: no choice. Of women have no choice. What these women
Speaker 2: are saying is that if they could choose, they would
Speaker 2: choose to not have to do that, right. But what
Speaker 2: they're also saying in this whole fetishization of rich men
Speaker 2: is that that is at the top of the list,
Speaker 2: and that they would reject the perfect guy if he
Speaker 2: had a crappy job, or not a crappy job, but
Speaker 2: a job that didn't pay well. So imagine a world
Speaker 2: in which em meets a guy who she has brilliant
Speaker 2: rapport with amazing chemistry. He's like just the loveliest guy,
Speaker 2: but he earns a very basic salary doing something very
Speaker 2: ordinary in which she's never going to be able to
Speaker 2: pay a mortgage. Are you really rejecting him?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, see there you go. Yeah that's interesting.
Speaker 3: But it also comes to just like that initial part
Speaker 3: of dating where when you date someone who you know
Speaker 3: makes either the same amount of money as you or more,
Speaker 3: it takes that like weight off your chest, because I
Speaker 3: think a symptom of finding someone you like is also
Speaker 3: really expensive because if you really like someone, you're in
Speaker 3: a day, you want to buy more drinks, you want
Speaker 3: to hang out with them more, and the money just
Speaker 3: adds up. And there have been times where I'm.
Speaker 1: Like, going for a walk in the park, how free?
Speaker 2: How far can you walk? You can walk?
Speaker 3: And they have to eventually get dinner. Dating doesn't have
Speaker 3: to cost it does have to cost money at some
Speaker 3: point if you want to spend a lot of time
Speaker 3: with that person, especially in the beginning.
Speaker 1: Two minute noodles and lots of sex.
Speaker 2: Anyway, go on.
Speaker 3: There have been times I've been on dates where I
Speaker 3: really like them, but I'm like, I can't financially support
Speaker 3: dating you.
Speaker 1: It is not because.
Speaker 5: You have to pay for everything, and I can't afford
Speaker 5: to pay for anything.
Speaker 3: And I have like I like nice things, like I
Speaker 3: want to go out to dinner, I want to get wine.
Speaker 2: But is that about wanting an equal because like you,
Speaker 2: you know, you earn money, so you're like, I want
Speaker 2: someone who is an equal partner, or you're saying I
Speaker 2: want somebody rich rich.
Speaker 3: I want someone who's either equal or more rich than me.
Speaker 2: You know they do you judge that? And it's entirely
Speaker 2: typical of women on dating apps. That are all these
Speaker 2: surveys that say that women want either financial equals or
Speaker 2: so in the class spec I mean this class isn't
Speaker 2: the right word, actually, but socioeconomic status. They will date
Speaker 2: across and up, and men will date all the way,
Speaker 2: all the way around that spectrum.
Speaker 5: They don't tend to date up, will they They will
Speaker 5: date in all directions, but they're very comfortable dating across
Speaker 5: and down, and they may or may not depending on
Speaker 5: the guy, like feel comfortable dating up. Isn't there a
Speaker 5: good reason for that whole Because if you think pragmatically
Speaker 5: about the fact that, Okay, if I want to have kids,
Speaker 5: we'll probably need to incomes. I'll have to have time
Speaker 5: off work. If I'm the main breadwinner, do I want
Speaker 5: to be the main breadwinner and the primary care And
Speaker 5: I know that you have a different model, so that
Speaker 5: didn't factor into your thinking.
Speaker 1: But isn't it just sort of pragmatic.
Speaker 2: It's very pragmatic.
Speaker 1: It's just not romantic.
Speaker 2: My issue with it is and this is a values thing.
Speaker 2: This is back to Jesse's list, right, the idea that
Speaker 2: I want somebody rich to take the pressure off me.
Speaker 2: I understand it. I certainly understand it. As a woman
Speaker 2: with a lot of financial pressure on her. It's hard.
Speaker 2: But that's how men have always felt. But men, you know,
Speaker 2: I want all the equality, please, I want all of it.
Speaker 3: Men don't do all the other stuff that women do
Speaker 3: when they become mums. They don't do like that mental
Speaker 3: load stuff they can if you make. The least they
Speaker 3: could do is pay for some things.
Speaker 2: But I think that's true. Like, this is what I
Speaker 2: would always advise somebody. I mean, obviously, if that's very
Speaker 2: high on your list, like I want a big house,
Speaker 2: I want three holidays a year, I want whatever whatever whatever,
Speaker 2: then sure, right? And I used to work with a
Speaker 2: woman who said, you would say to me exactly what
Speaker 2: Mia was saying at the beginning. She's like, it's as
Speaker 2: easy to fall in love with the rich man as
Speaker 2: a poor man, she'd say, So fall in love with
Speaker 2: the rich man and all these marrier rich man influencers,
Speaker 2: that's what they say. They're like, you're out there in
Speaker 2: the world, you're picking and choosing, you're swiping, you're dating.
Speaker 2: Why wouldn't you go for a better economic model? And
Speaker 2: considering how expensive it is for us to live in
Speaker 2: capital city. Certainly now it does make sense, but there's
Speaker 2: something so retro and depressing about the idea that I
Speaker 2: will sacrifice a whole lot of other things on my
Speaker 2: list for the money, Like I find that really depressing.
Speaker 5: There's something called the Sprinkle Sprinkle movement, which prioritizes financial
Speaker 5: stability and dating. This is kind of like, you know,
Speaker 5: the finance bro is an example of that, but it
Speaker 5: was sort of started by this woman called Sheer seven.
Speaker 5: She makes these long YouTube videos and she's become a
Speaker 5: bit of a cult figure. And the Sprinkle Sprinkle movement
Speaker 5: encourages women to live the soft life and be like
Speaker 5: soft girls, and it's very retro in which they prioritize
Speaker 5: money by dating older, wealthier partners. And this is known
Speaker 5: as hypergamy, this idea of dating someone who is rich
Speaker 5: basically so that you can have an easier life. Oh
Speaker 5: and it reminded me a little bit of in the
Speaker 5: nineties there were those guys who used to try and
Speaker 5: teach other men how to land model that we hatilize
Speaker 5: the modelizer, the model. Yeah, so there would be like
Speaker 5: these kind of dating coaches that would teach other men
Speaker 5: how to land hot women.
Speaker 1: And to me, this is kind of the same. And
Speaker 1: is it saying the quiet part out loud?
Speaker 2: It is if you want a certain kind of life.
Speaker 2: Like the thing that I struggle with about this is
Speaker 2: I want to be an equal partner in my world.
Speaker 2: Right personally, I would find it very hard to put
Speaker 2: my hand out for money, like from a partner. Do
Speaker 2: you know what I mean to be like, I need
Speaker 2: this for me to buy a hambag.
Speaker 1: Of course, he terribly vulnerable.
Speaker 2: It's terrible financial advice because it makes you dependent on somebody.
Speaker 1: A man is a financial plan and then and that.
Speaker 2: Man might be particularly if he is an alpha, you know,
Speaker 2: hyper successful dude. He might not be the loveliest person.
Speaker 2: And what I know, deep in my heart. And I
Speaker 2: know I sound pollyannor about it. Is what will make
Speaker 2: you happy is being with a good person. Of course,
Speaker 2: lots of good people are rich. I'm not saying that
Speaker 2: I find this so icky because it's like, my daughter
Speaker 2: listens to a lot of rap music, right, and we'll
Speaker 2: be in the car, and every woman that is being
Speaker 2: talked about on a lot of this stuff is she
Speaker 2: just wants you for your money. She just wants you
Speaker 2: to buy her handbags, she just wants you to buy
Speaker 2: a design of clothes. She's just trying to take you
Speaker 2: for everything you've got. Playing into this like sort.
Speaker 1: Of gold digger.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, literally the gold digger. And I thought that
Speaker 2: one of the great things about being able to make
Speaker 2: our own way in the world is that we didn't
Speaker 2: have to do that anymore, settle for a guy who
Speaker 2: might buy us shit but who wasn't a very nice person,
Speaker 2: or who might treat us like one of their objects
Speaker 2: or investments. Like I don't know. So, of course it's
Speaker 2: true that if the fantasy happens as it does in movies,
Speaker 2: where you fall madly in love with this wonderful person
Speaker 2: and then oh he's a millionaire or he's a prince
Speaker 2: or he like owns it, you know whatever, then that's lovely, right,
Speaker 2: But going out with that as your first priority is
Speaker 2: setting you up for a whole lot of compromises that
Speaker 2: I think are not necessarily the path to happiness.
Speaker 3: But I don't think that's what most young women want,
Speaker 3: Like I think the Sprinkle Sprinkle Lady is showing the extreme.
Speaker 3: She's saying, find a rich man so your life can
Speaker 3: be easier, whereas I'm saying, I want someone like you,
Speaker 3: like equal to me, because I don't want someone who
Speaker 3: will make my life harder, Like I don't want it
Speaker 3: to be easier, but I also don't want it to
Speaker 3: be harder. And the whole finance guy thing is just
Speaker 3: like a gimmicky thing that you know when you have
Speaker 3: like someone in that certain areaal field, and it's similar
Speaker 3: like like even if someone is like a trainer or
Speaker 3: something like if you know someone has a stable job,
Speaker 3: it just feels like an easier bet to be with.
Speaker 5: I've got a lot of gen X friends whose teenage
Speaker 5: daughters will troll them, like when you know they're asked,
Speaker 5: what do you want to be? What do you want
Speaker 5: to do after school? And They're like, nothing, I just
Speaker 5: want to get a sugar daddy own exactly. It's sugar
Speaker 5: daddy like their feminist mothers are like stop it, yes,
Speaker 5: stop trolling me.
Speaker 2: I say to my daughter all the time, like, you
Speaker 2: have got to earn your own money, like for me,
Speaker 2: and I guess that speaks to my values, right, Like
Speaker 2: independence is very high on my list. Earn your own
Speaker 2: money is very high on my list. I find this
Speaker 2: whole thing although it's funny and I love it, and
Speaker 2: the songs a banger, and it's also I'm like, no,
Speaker 2: you're not looking for a guy in finance. You're looking
Speaker 2: for a guy who shares your dreams and aspiration.
Speaker 3: But also from like supports your career and supports your career,
Speaker 3: but also from being with men who have earned less
Speaker 3: than me. From my experience, they also don't like that
Speaker 3: I earn more than them. I think they get a
Speaker 3: complex of dating someone who earns more than them.
Speaker 5: Which goes into the thing of I don't think guys
Speaker 5: do date up very often. I don't think they date
Speaker 5: across or down because it's a.
Speaker 3: Power thing for them.
Speaker 2: Only weak insecure man feel that way, like a proper, proper,
Speaker 2: confident human can deal with the idea that a woman
Speaker 2: can earn more money like it's so retro, I feel like,
Speaker 2: and it can't be an accident. So much of particularly
Speaker 2: American culture at the minute, is trying to pull us
Speaker 2: back somewhere. It's trying to pull us back to a
Speaker 2: more conservative time. And there's no question that some of
Speaker 2: that is easier in inverted commas on the surface, except
Speaker 2: it's not because it traps you, like it traps you
Speaker 2: if you don't have your own independence. So it's like
Speaker 2: it feels like a trap and that makes me uncomfortable.
Speaker 5: It's all because feminism has just gone too farther. Should
Speaker 5: never have made us wear pants and have the vite.
Speaker 1: This is what's happened clearly this month.
Speaker 2: Mumma Mia turned seventeen. We know birthdays aren't all that
Speaker 2: exciting when they're not well your birthday, there aren't enough presents,
Speaker 2: So we want to take this as a chance to
Speaker 2: give you a treat and say thank you for being
Speaker 2: on the ride with us.
Speaker 5: Right now, you can get twenty dollars off a yearly
Speaker 5: Mumma me a subscription with.
Speaker 1: The code out Loud Birthday.
Speaker 2: The offer is valid till the end of June, and
Speaker 2: you will find all the details of how to do
Speaker 2: that in the show notes. Enjoy, my friends.
Speaker 3: It is Friday today, so we are here to help
Speaker 3: you set up your weekend by giving you all of
Speaker 3: our recommendations. Fully, you have a really good one today.
Speaker 6: I do.
Speaker 2: I took my kids the movies on Saturday at the
Speaker 2: earliest opportunity to see Inside Out too.
Speaker 1: This is joy coming you live in Riley's mind, makes
Speaker 1: them no.
Speaker 5: In, no.
Speaker 2: Tanger me out.
Speaker 3: Of We gotta get our mouth guard.
Speaker 2: People hear sounds not hellus discussed glad to have her
Speaker 2: on our team. Our little girls growing up so fast Out.
Speaker 1: It should be nothing but smooth sailing from Hello.
Speaker 2: I'm anxiety. Where can I put myself? It's a kids movie.
Speaker 2: It's a sequel to Side Out Surprise Surprise A long time,
Speaker 2: really long time because at the end of the first.
Speaker 1: One, I don't understand this.
Speaker 5: At the end of the first one, it was so
Speaker 5: set up for the sequel when they're like, don't press
Speaker 5: the poor Barty button. She's entering Pooberty, and it was like, Oh,
Speaker 5: it's going to be such a good sequel.
Speaker 1: Forgot about it.
Speaker 2: I know, Well, it's here and the puberty button is pushed.
Speaker 2: It is so good, and it's not only good because
Speaker 2: it is a good movie, right, you know. It's got
Speaker 2: Amy Pohler is the Leader's joy again. It's got an
Speaker 2: amazing cast. As far as the movies you can all
Speaker 2: watch together if you've got a family, Go Inside Out
Speaker 2: is up there. But the real reason why it's great,
Speaker 2: why I'm recommending it is these movies also, particularly this one,
Speaker 2: because what happens in this one is puberty happens and
Speaker 2: a whole lot of new feelings come in and join
Speaker 2: the other feelings, and primary among them is Anxiety, who's
Speaker 2: played by Maya Hawk from Stranger Things. It's anxiety, envy,
Speaker 2: embarrassment and on we right, they joined the thing. It's
Speaker 2: so funny. Embarrassment is enormous and always wears a hoodie
Speaker 2: like pulled down over their finger, hardly says anything. And
Speaker 2: Anxiety is this very very highly strong, teeth chattering little person.
Speaker 2: And basically what happens is Anxiety takes over, takes control
Speaker 2: and pushes our girl Riley, who is the human with
Speaker 2: all the emotions to feel. She has to be perfect
Speaker 2: in every way. And it's just a beautiful and brilliant
Speaker 2: exploration of that point in a not only a girl's life,
Speaker 2: in a kid's life. And the thing that's great about
Speaker 2: this series, in my opinion, is it gives you like
Speaker 2: language to talk to your children about these things. You know,
Speaker 2: Riley's in this movie. She's an ice hockey player, right,
Speaker 2: and she wants to get on this team and everything's
Speaker 2: about that and she it's just she's pushing herself to
Speaker 2: the point of anxiety attacks. You can say to your children, like,
Speaker 2: that's your anxiety speaking, that's envy speaking, and it's personified.
Speaker 2: It's like there's a therapy system called internal family systems.
Speaker 2: It's like that for kids, like this is the part
Speaker 2: of you that is acting right now is envy and
Speaker 2: you can picture them in your head.
Speaker 1: And if I love that so anthropomorphizes emotions.
Speaker 2: That's very It's so great. I always remember when Inside
Speaker 2: Out came out that someone was saying about Pixar how
Speaker 2: it was like, what if monsters had feelings? What if
Speaker 2: toys had feelings? And then this series is what if
Speaker 2: feelings have fit? I love that it turned out too.
Speaker 2: It's in all good movie theaters now.
Speaker 5: My recommendation is a song and it's just an Earworms song.
Speaker 2: Is it looking for a Man in Finer?
Speaker 1: It is now, but it's.
Speaker 5: Actually Please Please Please, Sabrina Carpenter's new song, which is
Speaker 5: also her hard launch of her relationship with Barry Kyogan,
Speaker 5: who was in Sultburn. You might have seen the clip.
Speaker 5: Here's a little bit of the tune, ask him.
Speaker 3: Baby, please please Please don't prove.
Speaker 1: I do love it.
Speaker 5: The clip is her in jail and then he comes
Speaker 5: into jail and as she's been released on bail, and
Speaker 5: they lock eyes. And then my line that I like
Speaker 5: the most is I'm begging don't embarrass me, motherfucker.
Speaker 3: Especially because that's her real life boyfriend, and telling it
Speaker 3: to him in the music video while she.
Speaker 2: Suddenly ever, I look.
Speaker 5: She supported Taylor for part of this tour. She supported
Speaker 5: her in the Australian leg, and I sort of heard
Speaker 5: of her, but I didn't really know.
Speaker 1: Is she next Disney Start? I don't really. She's a
Speaker 1: tiny little She's like a pollypocket. I had a bloody
Speaker 1: Bumbshell yeah, I thought she was wearing a wig. She's
Speaker 1: like a if you put.
Speaker 5: Pamela Anderson, who was already tiny, but like, remember we
Speaker 5: used to put chip packets in the oven and they
Speaker 5: used to shrink down.
Speaker 1: She's like that. She's like a little shrinky Pamela had fun.
Speaker 2: When we were kids.
Speaker 3: Generation even a man in finance.
Speaker 5: We didn't have to leave us alone. And so she's
Speaker 5: like this little hot little thing. But she's kind of
Speaker 5: cute hot, she's not. Yeah, she's very anyway.
Speaker 1: It's a it's a good bop. I think it's a
Speaker 1: good bop.
Speaker 3: I've got a bit of a dark wreco this week.
Speaker 3: So over the weekend I went to a premiere for
Speaker 3: a new show that's out on stand. It's called Exposure.
Speaker 1: What brings you to til funeral?
Speaker 4: Friend?
Speaker 1: What happened over there? It's I think she was seeing
Speaker 1: some guy?
Speaker 4: What makes you think of?
Speaker 5: You know? A whole bunch of calls from someone she's
Speaker 5: saved as do not message.
Speaker 1: She's the guy from Girls Phone.
Speaker 6: I want to know what he did.
Speaker 3: I've watched the first three episodes and it is so good.
Speaker 3: It's led by an all female team, so the director, producer, creator,
Speaker 3: and leader all women. It's very dark and it has
Speaker 3: some thriller elements to it. So the series follows this
Speaker 3: young woman named Jax who's in her twenties and she
Speaker 3: experiences some sort of traumatic event, and the creator Lucy
Speaker 3: describes it as kind of a burning rage towards men,
Speaker 3: but also a desperation to be validated by them at
Speaker 3: the same time. Jax is played by Alice Englert. She's
Speaker 3: also starred in a recent film with Jennifer Connelly call
Speaker 3: bab Behavior.
Speaker 5: I've heard about this, yes, Jennifer Cundley is amazing. She's
Speaker 5: kind of one that you don't hear about much. She's
Speaker 5: phenomenal when you see her in a movie. She's like
Speaker 5: an actor's actor.
Speaker 3: And she's also in Dark Matter, which is our Apple
Speaker 3: TV also Good Wreck. But yeah, she's amazing. So the
Speaker 3: series just kind of follows her investigating this traumatic event
Speaker 3: that happened to her. A lot of men, there's a
Speaker 3: lot of sex. It's really dark, but highly recommend. It's
Speaker 3: out on Stan.
Speaker 2: Out loud as if you want to listen to us
Speaker 2: every day of the week, and why wouldn't you, You
Speaker 2: can get access to exclusive segments on Tuesdays and Thursdays
Speaker 2: by becoming a MoMA mea subscriber. Follow the link in
Speaker 2: the show notes to subscribe, and a big thank you
Speaker 2: to all our current subscribers.
Speaker 5: It's time for our best and Worst Moments of the week,
Speaker 5: where we take a little bit of a reflection on
Speaker 5: our personal lives and look at some personal highs personal
Speaker 5: lows from the week, no judgment.
Speaker 1: I'll start with my worst. It's the rule.
Speaker 5: I'm missing Lunar. I'm missing her so much. When a
Speaker 5: baby is away, it's a long chunk in their.
Speaker 1: Life, Like it's three weeks.
Speaker 5: It'll be three weeks when I see her next, which'll
Speaker 5: be on Sunday, meeting up. All the videos that I
Speaker 5: get sent and everything, and I just I'm worried she
Speaker 5: won't remember me and won't love me anymore, and that
Speaker 5: our bond will be broken.
Speaker 2: Of course it won't your grandma.
Speaker 1: I just feel like maybe she won't anyway.
Speaker 2: And what about Jesse? Do you miss all of them
Speaker 2: or just my son's back?
Speaker 5: But do you know who I also miss is my
Speaker 5: daughter is now actually with Jesse. My daughter's gone to
Speaker 5: Europe for a big after school trip, and she landed
Speaker 5: in Paris and then went straight to meet up with
Speaker 5: Jesse and Claire and their babies, and and yeah.
Speaker 2: What would happen if they fly in on Saturday? Night,
Speaker 2: and then Jessica says, Oh, we're just too tired. Do
Speaker 2: you mind if we don't? Can't tomorrow?
Speaker 1: I'll just be anyway.
Speaker 5: I'll be like, oh the babies, gently like, don't be
Speaker 5: there at three to take her. I just miss her
Speaker 5: so much. And apparently now she can say nana. I'm
Speaker 5: very excited about that, except I don't think she has
Speaker 5: any idea what that means. My best this week is
Speaker 5: the funny best. I cried in a No Filter interview,
Speaker 5: and I think I've only done that maybe two or
Speaker 5: three times in eight years. And the reason that it
Speaker 5: was my best is because it's really exciting to feel
Speaker 5: that engaged in something again. I've been, you know, really
Speaker 5: busy and really stretched, and I've been struggling with No
Speaker 5: Filter for a little while.
Speaker 1: I'm just really.
Speaker 5: Having a moment where I'm just leaning in to No
Speaker 5: Filter again. And this interview. I did three hours of
Speaker 5: No Filter interviews in half a day, and it was
Speaker 5: a lot. Yeah, and they were completely different interviews. I
Speaker 5: just was so engaged and I just loved them.
Speaker 2: Are you gonna tell us who made you cry? Yeah?
Speaker 5: So her name's Darcy Erlick. The name might be familiar
Speaker 5: someone I've wanted to interview for about ten years. She
Speaker 5: was abused by Malkalafa, who was the principal at a
Speaker 5: very religious girls school in Melbourne, and she fought to
Speaker 5: have her extradited from Israel back to Australia for ten
Speaker 5: years or more. She's now in jail and talking to Dussy,
Speaker 5: who's written this book. And actually when that happened to her,
Speaker 5: she could have written ten books about what had happened
Speaker 5: to her life until that point that she met Michael Lafer,
Speaker 5: and they all would have been terrible. But the reason
Speaker 5: I was crying, I was actually crying during the bad parts.
Speaker 1: I was crying at the end, and if they were
Speaker 1: happy tears.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So I can't wait for you to hear that it's
Speaker 1: going to be in a couple of weeks. I'll keep
Speaker 1: you posted.
Speaker 2: My worst is related to my recommendation. So when I
Speaker 2: was excited as Brent's been away and me and the
Speaker 2: kids were like, that's our outing on Saturday, as we're
Speaker 2: going to go see Inside Out and then ge Dumplings.
Speaker 2: That's so happy place, Dumblanks obviously, So I just booked
Speaker 2: the first session that was available at the movie theater
Speaker 2: nere Us. And what I didn't see is that it
Speaker 2: was the like little kids session where they have and
Speaker 2: this is amazing that they have this right, but I
Speaker 2: mean noisy, so it means mums and bubs. It's not
Speaker 2: mums and bubbs. But what is they have like a
Speaker 2: play literal playground at the front in front of the screen.
Speaker 2: Stop it so like with slides that go down. It's
Speaker 2: wrong with children that they can't sit through a movie.
Speaker 2: Either go to a movie or go to the playground.
Speaker 2: Don't have the playground at the movie. The playground is
Speaker 2: at the movies. And then the other thing that happens
Speaker 2: is that halfway through the movie it just stops and
Speaker 2: it's ten minutes of playtime. And none of those I
Speaker 2: would quite like that, and none of the kids had
Speaker 2: observed the ten minutes of playtime. And the thing is
Speaker 2: is my kids. As soon as I said to Billy
Speaker 2: once I realized that because I booked the tickets online,
Speaker 2: and as soon as I realized that it was the
Speaker 2: kid's session, because this little green thing comes up and
Speaker 2: it's like kids session, I told Billy and he was like,
Speaker 2: you have made a terrible mission. And I was like,
Speaker 2: what are you talking about? Bill? And he's like, I've
Speaker 2: been to one of those before. The kids never sit down,
Speaker 2: it's really noisy. You can't watch the movie and they
Speaker 2: just stop it halfway through it. And I was like,
Speaker 2: it won't be like that, Baby, it won't be like that.
Speaker 2: And it was exactly like that, and both of the
Speaker 2: kids hate it all the way through the movie theater.
Speaker 2: But the other thing it made me realize was is
Speaker 2: that when my kids were little, that would have been
Speaker 2: my idea of heaven, right, Like I used to take
Speaker 2: my baby to mums and bubs, the idea that I
Speaker 2: got a three year old and I could go and
Speaker 2: watch Inside Out too, Like it would have been great.
Speaker 2: But it just reminds you that once you're done with
Speaker 2: a live stage, you are done with that live stage.
Speaker 5: Right. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I'm just like, now I've got no tolerance anymore for
Speaker 2: the little children running around, and I'm just like, why
Speaker 2: can't they sit down? Why can't they just be quiet?
Speaker 2: And for children? And Billy are like that you are?
Speaker 2: Do you know?
Speaker 5: That's interesting because I'm going to retract what I said
Speaker 5: about either have a playground or a movie.
Speaker 1: I think that if you've got more than one kid.
Speaker 5: It's expensive to go to the movies, right, so if
Speaker 5: you have to get a babysitter or find childcare for
Speaker 5: the kid that's maybe too little to sit through the
Speaker 5: whole thing, and then your older kid really wants to
Speaker 5: sit through the whole thing.
Speaker 1: It's actually I think it's.
Speaker 2: A great idea. It's just not a good idea once
Speaker 2: your kids harder than four. If the error was yours,
Speaker 2: the error was one hundred three percent mine. As my
Speaker 2: children were still letting me know.
Speaker 3: They would love to be telling you I told you
Speaker 3: so oh so much, and that thing is Matildad could
Speaker 3: tell I felt really bad about it, and she was
Speaker 3: trying to make me feel better about it, and she's like,
Speaker 3: it's not that bad, Mum.
Speaker 2: I can still hear the movie, mom, whereas Billy was
Speaker 2: like glaring at me, like you're an idiot.
Speaker 5: It was great anyway on the slide in the minute
Speaker 5: didn't but I was quite tempered, and you.
Speaker 3: Recommended the movie, so you.
Speaker 1: My best was.
Speaker 2: I got to be a boomer for a night last week.
Speaker 2: We're very rock and roll in our house. Brent and
Speaker 2: I go to pub trivia every two weeks at our
Speaker 2: local pub around the corner. It's our date night. That's
Speaker 2: what we do. We have two drinks, we play a
Speaker 2: round of trivia. We're up there, right, and our nemesiss
Speaker 2: in that pub trip are called the Baby Boomerangs and
Speaker 2: they are boomers right.
Speaker 3: What's your team name?
Speaker 2: Two brains, one pen. That's what we're called smart and
Speaker 2: so the Baby Boomerangs are our Nemesisicatus is right. Anyway,
Speaker 2: Brent was away, he's been in New Zealand for a week,
Speaker 2: sees out, and the Baby Boomerangs offered a hand to
Speaker 2: me and said do you want to come to trivia
Speaker 2: anyway and join our team for the night. And I
Speaker 2: was like, that's so nice, and yes I do, thank you.
Speaker 2: I want to get out of the house. And so
Speaker 2: I went and I joined their team. And the thing
Speaker 2: that was so great about it, Mia is that we won.
Speaker 2: And the reason we won is because of my gen
Speaker 2: x energy and my wasted youth, because we were neck
Speaker 2: and neck with the team next to us.
Speaker 5: Right.
Speaker 2: The Boomerang's very smart. They know lots of things, but
Speaker 2: they're not very good at celebrities, not very good in gossip.
Speaker 2: This is where I am shy. The final round comes,
Speaker 2: we are neck and neck with the table next to us.
Speaker 2: Who there are nine of them, and one of my
Speaker 2: baby boomers thought that was a violation.
Speaker 6: Of the rules.
Speaker 2: But anyway, we digressed.
Speaker 1: They had a holly.
Speaker 2: So the last round was photographs of celebrities when they
Speaker 2: were children. No, I got ten out of ten easily.
Speaker 2: I just grabbed the piece of paper. I said, move over,
Speaker 2: this is my round. I filled it in. We got ten.
Speaker 3: We won well the photos and black and white some
Speaker 3: of them. That's whole other level.
Speaker 1: And we could have been pixelated and she still smashed it.
Speaker 2: We won, got the baby boomerangs over the line, and
Speaker 2: now my status in my community is high.
Speaker 3: That's a big slave.
Speaker 2: Good breads out of and bred need never come back,
Speaker 2: come back. I don't need him anymore. And best and worst.
Speaker 3: So my worst was in one single night, I ran
Speaker 3: into three xes.
Speaker 2: That's a lot.
Speaker 1: Where were you?
Speaker 3: I was at that stand event that was also part
Speaker 3: of my reco So I was at the stand event.
Speaker 3: It was part of the Sydney Film Festival, so there
Speaker 3: was a lot of people, so a lot of people
Speaker 3: could also buy tickets to watch the film. And as
Speaker 3: we were walking into the cinema, one of my exes
Speaker 3: was walking out of the previous one. Big surprise because
Speaker 3: he the reason we broke up was because he told
Speaker 3: me he was moving to Japan, so obviously no, he
Speaker 3: was very much not in Japan.
Speaker 6: Jo.
Speaker 3: He was at the Sydney Film Festival and we were like, oh,
Speaker 3: I Like what.
Speaker 2: Motherfucker? He said, I in Japan.
Speaker 3: Japan looks great on you.
Speaker 1: He was like no.
Speaker 5: No, I said, I wanted to get Japanese food, and.
Speaker 3: Then you ghosted me.
Speaker 5: No.
Speaker 3: I was with a head of Entertainment Laura Brodney, so
Speaker 3: I hid behind her because she's very tall, so he
Speaker 3: didn't see me. And then we went and found our seats.
Speaker 3: It was assigned seating unfortunately, so we had to sit
Speaker 3: in our seats. And then I was looking over and
Speaker 3: I was like that guy looks really familiar, and he
Speaker 3: was like approaching. I had sex with him, and he
Speaker 3: was another ex boyfriend who I dated in my early twenties.
Speaker 3: He sat directly in front of me director Hello. No,
Speaker 3: we looked at each other. He was meant to be here.
Speaker 3: We broke up and there was a mutual breakup.
Speaker 1: When's the third one?
Speaker 3: Third one was after the event, I went to a
Speaker 3: friend's party and my ex was at that part. I
Speaker 3: was except he was like kind of an expected run
Speaker 3: in because I knew he was invited, But when I
Speaker 3: saw I was like, so ago the Joseph Christmas Path.
Speaker 3: I feel like it couldn't even be a sitcom because
Speaker 3: it's too much.
Speaker 5: Going back to the japan one, Yeah, you clearly haven't
Speaker 5: been following him in social media, Like were you not
Speaker 5: curious to see how it turned out in Tokyo?
Speaker 3: No, because I really really liked him, and it would
Speaker 3: like hurt every time I would look at his social
Speaker 3: So I even told him. I was like, Hey, I'm
Speaker 3: just gonna unfollow you because this is too much for me.
Speaker 3: It's smart, and he was like thank god, because I'm
Speaker 3: not actually.
Speaker 1: Now go through with that elaborate.
Speaker 2: Japan Oh, I'm not so great. What's your best?
Speaker 3: My best was actually the house party I went to
Speaker 3: afterwards because it was his massive house party. I always
Speaker 3: thought I was a bit too old for house parties,
Speaker 3: but I was like one of the other ones there's
Speaker 3: but I had so much fun. It was my best
Speaker 3: because in the whole situation I was in seeing my
Speaker 3: ex'es and the week massive house party I usually get
Speaker 3: quite tipsy at those kind of events because it's like alcohol,
Speaker 3: you're buying your own. Alcohol is pretty cheap. Also, we're
Speaker 3: all having house parties because no one can afford to anymore.
Speaker 2: They're back, so it's back.
Speaker 3: So I haven't been drinking the whole week. And then
Speaker 3: I just kind of like stayed a bit sensible because
Speaker 3: I've since I've gotten older and started to really value
Speaker 3: my Sunday time.
Speaker 2: Yes, and I just want It's one of the first
Speaker 2: signs you're growing up, Like I don't want to ruin
Speaker 2: the whole day.
Speaker 3: And I was like, ah, I have like to do
Speaker 3: my washing at ten because I have them too busy
Speaker 3: during the week in my washing. So I ended up
Speaker 3: not drinking as much and I had a really nice
Speaker 3: Sunday and it was like the first time where I
Speaker 3: feel like I've stepped back from alcohol.
Speaker 2: Good for you. Yeah, Look, she's mid before her time.
Speaker 1: Was there any finance guys there?
Speaker 3: There weren't any finance guys there. If there were, I
Speaker 3: would have been a bit drunk.
Speaker 5: Am I have a question for you before we go.
Speaker 5: Have you had of the term mattress since when you
Speaker 5: think of becoming a mother one day, if indeed you
Speaker 5: would like to or not.
Speaker 1: Do you imagine that.
Speaker 5: It would change you or do you think it freaks
Speaker 5: you out that it would change you?
Speaker 2: Does it change you?
Speaker 3: Surely not?
Speaker 1: Oh my god, doesn't happen?
Speaker 2: And then yesterday's episode Holly changes everything.
Speaker 5: Both with jem of Bath who has been a mother
Speaker 5: for eighteen months, about the concept of mattressence and that
Speaker 5: is like adolescence, but what happens to you and your
Speaker 5: identity after you have kids.
Speaker 2: Here's inside out three yes say, oh my god.
Speaker 5: First it was pubitty and now it should be make
Speaker 5: matt trescence. Riley can skip ahead a little bit.
Speaker 1: Here's a little sneak peak.
Speaker 2: Of the chat. Did having a baby change your lives?
Speaker 1: One hundred percent? Isn't that the point?
Speaker 2: Exactly?
Speaker 6: Going through birth was a real kind of light bulb
Speaker 6: moment for me because I learned so much about my body.
Speaker 6: And then when it comes to relationships, nothing tests more
Speaker 6: than a baby. We know that I see women having
Speaker 6: almost an existential Oh my god, who even am I?
Speaker 6: And men just don't like their lives are very different
Speaker 6: and they really love this baby and they might have
Speaker 6: to make sacrifices and everything but who they are as
Speaker 6: an individual is not something that changes in the same
Speaker 6: way that it does for a mother. We will put
Speaker 6: a link to that episode in the show notes so
Speaker 6: you can listen right now.
Speaker 2: We're done for the week. We are done for the week.
Speaker 2: Thank you em Vernon for being an absolutely excellent standout
Speaker 2: for stand in, not stand out, a standout stand in
Speaker 2: for Jesse Stevens. We have loved having you around. I
Speaker 2: know the outlouders have to thank you to all our
Speaker 2: out louders for lending us sure is. This episode was
Speaker 2: produced by Emmalin Gazillis. The assistant producer was Charlie Blackman,
Speaker 2: and there's been audio production from Leah Porge's. And we
Speaker 2: will see you all next week. By by.
Speaker 5: Shout out to any Muma Mia subscribers listening.
Speaker 1: If you love the show and want to support us
Speaker 1: as well, subscribing to mom and Mia is the very
Speaker 1: best way to do so. There is a link in
Speaker 1: the episode description.