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Speaker 1: This episode is brought to you by Banister's Hotels. Welcome

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Speaker 1: to the Seize the Yay Podcast. Busy and happy are

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Speaker 1: not the same thing. We too rarely question what makes

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Speaker 1: the heart seeing. We work, then we rest, but rarely

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Speaker 1: we play and often don't realize there's more than one way.

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Speaker 1: So this is a platform to hear and explore the

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Speaker 1: stories of those who found lives they adore, the good,

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Speaker 1: bad and ugly, The best and worst day will bear

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Speaker 1: all the facets of Seizing your Yea. I'm Sarah Davidson

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Speaker 1: or Spoonful of Sarah, a lawyer turned entrepreneur who swapped

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Speaker 1: the suits and heels to co found matcha Maiden and

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Speaker 1: matcha Milk Bar.

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Speaker 2: Sez the Ya is.

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Speaker 1: A series of conversations on finding a life you love

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Speaker 1: and exploring the self doubt, challenge, joy and.

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Speaker 2: Fulfillment along the way.

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Speaker 1: Welcome back, lovely neighborhood and very big hugs to my

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Speaker 1: fellow Victorians as some restrictions finally start to meaningfully lift

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Speaker 1: this week. For the first time in so long, I've

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Speaker 1: completely forgotten how to be a normal human being. But

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Speaker 1: I'm so excited to get back into it. This show

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Speaker 1: has been such a grounding force marking the passing of

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Speaker 1: each week, despite the rollercoaster that's been going on between

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Speaker 1: every episode. So thank you so much again for giving

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Speaker 1: me a reason to do it. I can safely say

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Speaker 1: you've kept me sane this year.

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Speaker 2: As you know.

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Speaker 1: This week we've got another Q and A episode to

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Speaker 1: mark our first anniversary as mister and missus Davidson. I

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Speaker 1: actually just went back and listened to the one we

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Speaker 1: did a few days before the wedding last year, and

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Speaker 1: I'm so glad we did that because it was so

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Speaker 1: nice to have a record of how we felt in

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Speaker 1: the days leading up to it, how excited and nervous

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Speaker 1: we were. But it was, yeah, really nice to have

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Speaker 1: a record to compare to how we felt then to

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Speaker 1: how we felt now.

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Speaker 2: Have a little listen.

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Speaker 1: So we're getting married this Friday, the twenty fifth of October,

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Speaker 1: which is the weekend of our ten year anniversary.

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Speaker 3: Who sleeps out that's it?

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Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, still time for me to pull out.

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Speaker 1: Oh oh, oh my god. He's literally been saying that

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Speaker 1: for like ten years now. As you can imagine, since then,

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Speaker 1: it hasn't quite been the first year of marriage we envisioned,

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Speaker 1: but It's been wonderful for so many other reasons, many

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Speaker 1: of which I hadn't reflected on properly at all until

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Speaker 1: we recorded this. So thank you so much again for

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Speaker 1: being so interested and submitting your questions that were so

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Speaker 1: thought out and really gave us a reason to sit

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Speaker 1: down and say some really nice things about each other.

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Speaker 1: Even though we spend a lot of time bagging each

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Speaker 1: other out, we squeezed in as many of your questions

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Speaker 1: as we could. As open as we are about many things,

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Speaker 1: we're actually quite private about many other things, and I'm

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Speaker 1: surprised Nick opened up as much as he did. Even

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Speaker 1: I heard things I haven't heard before, which was lovely.

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Speaker 1: So thank you guys so much for sparking this conversation.

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Speaker 1: Of course, the pace is a little different to usual

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Speaker 1: without our regular sections, and I think we both forgot

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Speaker 1: we were recording a few times. So when I say

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Speaker 1: sometimes podcasts are just like being a fly on the wall,

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Speaker 1: you'll literally cop a lot of stuff that's totally irrelevant

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Speaker 1: and just a couple having a chat. So sorry about

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Speaker 1: anything irrelevant, and sorry also for anything that is a

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Speaker 1: major overshare. I've noticed I get a little vulnerability hangover

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Speaker 1: after these Q and A episodes without the buffer of

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Speaker 1: a new guest story. So I feel like I want

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Speaker 1: to continually apologize for how much of a goob I am.

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Speaker 1: But I'll stop now before I make it any worse.

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Speaker 1: Hope you guys enjoy and have a little giggle along

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Speaker 1: the way. Mister Davidson, welcome back to the show.

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Speaker 3: Thanks for having me. Longtime listener, third time caller.

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Speaker 1: Oh you're such a dog buckle in guys, you're in

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Speaker 1: for a bumpy ride. Welcome to our anniversary episode, Happy

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Speaker 1: first Anniversary.

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Speaker 3: The anniversary one year of marriage, eleven years of relationship.

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Speaker 1: That nearly was way too long a pause. I was like,

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Speaker 1: oh my god, he's going to do it again. I

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Speaker 1: just went back and listened to the episode we did

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Speaker 1: a couple of days before we got married, which was

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Speaker 1: lovely to hear how nervous and excited we were. But

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Speaker 1: also I realized one of our major love languages is

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Speaker 1: just bagging each other out. So if you didn't know,

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Speaker 1: I feel like you wouldn't know how much we actually

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Speaker 1: love each other. So it's been lovely to have a

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Speaker 1: reason to come back a year later and reflect on

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Speaker 1: our first year of marriage and how wonderful it's been,

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Speaker 1: even though of course it's been nothing like we expected.

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Speaker 2: It to be weird.

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Speaker 1: And thank you guys so much for your questions. We've

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Speaker 1: had so many submitted, and I actually love these Q

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Speaker 1: and A episodes as nervous as they make me sometimes,

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Speaker 1: because I feel like it makes us reflect as well

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Speaker 1: on things that you know, we don't really stop and

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Speaker 1: sort of have conversations about. So thank you guys so

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Speaker 1: much again for giving us the occasion to sit down

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Speaker 1: and reflect on our.

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Speaker 2: First year together.

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Speaker 1: First question from missus Jen Lucas and Natty H seventy

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Speaker 1: seven what was your favorite moment from the wedding day?

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Speaker 1: And I'm sure you guys can all tell from how

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Speaker 1: much we've been spamming you that we had the best

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Speaker 1: day of our whole lives.

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Speaker 3: It's a tough one obviously. Watching you walk down the

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Speaker 3: aisle was pretty amazing. When I first saw your dress

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Speaker 3: and stuff like that.

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Speaker 1: I remember the look on your face. I've never seen

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Speaker 1: you look like that. It was so beautiful. But also

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Speaker 1: my brother was bawling his eyes out all the way

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Speaker 1: down the aisle. He walked me down the aisle, guys,

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Speaker 1: and from the very moment that we stepped into the

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Speaker 1: like the area with the aisle, he started crying his

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Speaker 1: eyes out and he does not cry, but it was

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Speaker 1: so sweet.

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Speaker 3: Seeing Paul come down the aisle was also.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, oh my gosh.

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Speaker 1: I think we mentioned in the episode last year we

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Speaker 1: couldn't get married without involving Paul, so he was our

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Speaker 1: ring bearer and he did not disappoint in his little tuxedo.

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Speaker 3: The ceremony parts kind of blur. I kind of just

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Speaker 3: watched that on the video rather than lived it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, me too, that's so weird.

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Speaker 3: Loved the speeches. It was beautiful and it was very

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Speaker 3: difficult to find one particular moment. It was just a

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Speaker 3: beautiful day.

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Speaker 2: Such a perfect day.

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Speaker 1: We've been reliving it so much, watching the video over

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Speaker 1: and over before anniversary, and I think my favorite memory

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Speaker 1: also so hard to pick, but I think it would

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Speaker 1: be the same as yours. When I first saw you,

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Speaker 1: we stayed separately the night before, so I hadn't seen

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Speaker 1: you in twenty four maybe even forty eight hours because

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Speaker 1: your bridal party, your groomsmen had flown in from everywhere,

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Speaker 1: and so had my bridesmaids. So when I first saw

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Speaker 1: you firstly, you were so nervous. I've never seen you

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Speaker 1: nervous like that, I don't think ever, And it was

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Speaker 1: just so special seeing your face, but also looking around

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Speaker 1: and seeing all our favorite people in one room, all

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Speaker 1: of them pretty much crying. It was just so surreal

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Speaker 1: and I have goosebumps actually just thinking about it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that was awesome. I mean, because we have so

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Speaker 3: many friends from different countries and stuff like that, seeing

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Speaker 3: all of those people in the one place, I don't

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Speaker 3: think we've ever had anything near having them in the

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Speaker 3: same place before.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and it was so lovely when they all knew

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Speaker 1: of each other, but some of them hadn't met before,

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Speaker 1: so seeing everyone mingling and talking, it was just so

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Speaker 1: so beautiful and so filled with love. The other one

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Speaker 1: of my favorite moments was our wedding dance. We've been practicing,

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Speaker 1: gosh for what like six months with our choreographer. We

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Speaker 1: had our dear friend Jared Byrne, who is absolutely incredible

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Speaker 1: one Dancing with the Stars last year. He choreographed this

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Speaker 1: amazing dance and we've been practicing. Yeah, do you think

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Speaker 1: it was six months?

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Speaker 3: Maybe?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, So after practicing for so long, it was just

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Speaker 1: so special to actually do it. And it was to

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Speaker 1: the song I Love You Baby. So it was just

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Speaker 1: so lovely. Everyone was singing and dancing and clapping and

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Speaker 1: it was just so much fun. The photos all we

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Speaker 1: have our mouths wide open. We're just having the best

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Speaker 1: time of our lives. Except when you messed up.

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Speaker 3: That end bit you weren't in the right position. Sure.

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Speaker 1: Sure, next question, cannot think of a username right now,

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Speaker 1: asked if there's a moment from that night that we

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Speaker 1: would want to relive.

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Speaker 3: That is a great user name.

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Speaker 1: It is a great use name I would want to relive.

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Speaker 1: I think the ceremony, like we said before, because it

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Speaker 1: was such a blur. We were so nervous and excited that. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think a lot of the moments that we remember

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Speaker 1: because we watched them in the videos.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, the video was incredible, So lucky there.

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Speaker 2: They were amazing. Moon and back co guys.

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Speaker 1: If anyone is looking for a wedding videographer, I can't

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Speaker 1: recommend them more highly. And another one of my favorite

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Speaker 1: moments that I just remembered was when we got home

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Speaker 1: after the wedding. We stayed at Crown for a couple

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Speaker 1: of nights because we weren't doing a honeymoon. We just

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Speaker 1: had a few nights together in hotel and when we

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Speaker 1: got back, we stayed in our clothes that I was

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Speaker 1: in my dress, Nick was in his tucks, and we

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Speaker 1: just spent two hours staying up and watching everyone's video.

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Speaker 1: And there was so many moments that we weren't there

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Speaker 1: for and we didn't see because you know, you go

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Speaker 1: off and you take photos and you don't get to

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Speaker 1: see what everyone was doing and who's talking to who,

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Speaker 1: and who's making friends, and you know, it was just

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Speaker 1: it was so lovely to go through and watch what

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Speaker 1: everyone else experienced from the wedding. It was the culinary cupcakes.

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Speaker 1: Asked who made my dress, it was the incredible Palace

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Speaker 1: Couture who made it from scratch over the six to

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Speaker 1: eight months beforehand. There's actually a video on Instagram that

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Speaker 1: shows the whole process from like bear fabric to choosing

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Speaker 1: the lace and then yeah, getting it already. It's so

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Speaker 1: cool watching it come to life. I've never had anything

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Speaker 1: made custom, As you guys know, I'm not really a

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Speaker 1: fashion hister, but I felt like our wedding was the

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Speaker 1: right occasion and I felt like an absolute princess. What

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Speaker 1: did you think of it. Nick, I don't think I've

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Speaker 1: actually asked you that I'm Jack.

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Speaker 3: You looked fucking incredible. Yeah, it was amazing.

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Speaker 2: You were those pauses.

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Speaker 3: I was hoping for a pink too too, but.

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Speaker 2: I mean that was my first choice, but I just thought,

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Speaker 2: you want.

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Speaker 3: To clash with my pink too. It was lucky because

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Speaker 3: I was going to wear the same thing. I was

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Speaker 3: going to wear a white corset two and I'm just

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Speaker 3: so lucky I didn't. It was disclosed.

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Speaker 1: The raf god a just one song that you would

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Speaker 1: have added to the wedding dance list and why I

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Speaker 1: think our playlist was pretty good.

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Speaker 3: No, we had a belter of a playlist. I think

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Speaker 3: you should share it in the wed end of the

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Speaker 3: episode notes.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's a good idea. I don't think they were guys.

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Speaker 2: You see what I put up with, Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, I don't think there were any songs that

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Speaker 1: we didn't include.

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Speaker 3: We also had some pretty awesome DJs and people around

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Speaker 3: that do know how to play decent music.

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Speaker 2: We did.

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Speaker 1: Indeed, we had Duchess Kay as our DJ. She was

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Speaker 1: absolutely amazing and that was so too. Of our dear

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Speaker 1: friends who were also DJs. Andy Murphy and caran Ong

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Speaker 1: didn't have to work on the night, but they could

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Speaker 1: if they wanted, and then they ended up getting on

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Speaker 1: the decks anyway.

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Speaker 2: Surprise, surprise.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Can't and Andy are amazing. They're two very very

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Speaker 3: close friends, and we just didn't want them to have

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Speaker 3: to feel like they had to play on the wedding day.

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Speaker 3: They wanted to jump up and play they could, but

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Speaker 3: the moment they got a chance, they are up there.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, always the life of the party. The raf God

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Speaker 1: also asked asked, how would you describe your married life

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Speaker 1: so far?

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Speaker 3: Easy? I think so too, Bike, It's just easy. It's

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Speaker 3: just natural. I think everything changed but nothing changed, you

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Speaker 3: know what I mean.

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Speaker 2: I totally agree.

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Speaker 1: Everyone's like it's exactly the same, nothing changes, which it

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Speaker 1: is day to day. It is the same, but something

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Speaker 1: overall changes, Like it's also not the same at all.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, it's like you don't think there's another

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Speaker 1: level after you know, ten years.

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Speaker 3: It's a lot more calm. I think there's like a

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Speaker 3: calmness and like not that anything I've ever done is

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Speaker 3: being calm, But.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, it's just like I definitely don't think

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Speaker 1: anyone would describe either of us as a couple as calm,

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Speaker 1: and I worry about our poor kids. But yeah, I

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Speaker 1: mean it's definitely been unexpected. It's not the first twelve

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Speaker 1: months that we thought would happen.

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Speaker 2: That's obviously not what ended.

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Speaker 1: Up happening because of COVID, But it's involved more domestic

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Speaker 1: time than we usually would have had, which I actually

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Speaker 1: think has been really nice.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, way more. Our first year of marriage actually wouldn't

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Speaker 3: have been that ideal. I mean, I would have been

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Speaker 3: in Europe for six weeks without you for work and

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Speaker 3: back and forth with the States and stuff, and I

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Speaker 3: think you're wrong that we would have and we would

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Speaker 3: have spent a lot of time Europe together for work

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Speaker 3: and all that other and weddings and stuff, and that

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Speaker 3: would have been lovely. But I think I would definitely

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Speaker 3: have chosen been lockdown with you for the first twelve

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Speaker 3: months of marriage has been lovely.

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Speaker 2: It has been really nice.

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Speaker 1: I don't think we've had this much time just pottering

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Speaker 1: at home together in years. I mean we've been spending

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Speaker 1: weekends just doing crosswords and kind of starting to paint

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Speaker 1: the house ourselves and gardening and building stuff like that's

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Speaker 1: actually been a really, really nice change to the pace

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Speaker 1: of our lives for the past couple of years that

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Speaker 1: I know we definitely wouldn't have made time for otherwise,

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Speaker 1: which has been Yeah, I think it's been lovely. Next

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Speaker 1: question vvn Huinn. Do you guys plan on doing any

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Speaker 1: sort of annual traditions to celebrate your wedding anniversary?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? I mean, I plan to be awake from you

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Speaker 3: every time.

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Speaker 2: See Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: I feel like if people don't understand that this is

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Speaker 1: our sense of humor, they'll just be like, what is

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Speaker 1: wrong with his marriage?

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Speaker 3: We're very interesting. I mean, Sarah is not someone that

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Speaker 3: needs like fancy things and stuff like that, and even

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Speaker 3: like fancy restaurants, we tend to go to the same

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Speaker 3: ones and enjoy the same thing. So I'd assume that

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Speaker 3: we would probably just go on a little trip every time,

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Speaker 3: I think, because that's kind of what we enjoy doing,

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Speaker 3: and that sounds quite indulgent. But it doesn't need to

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Speaker 3: be the mul Dives. It could be Country Victoria or

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Speaker 3: Staycay or a crappy motel in Ocean Grove with something

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Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't know what.

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Speaker 2: I feel like he lost interest halfway through the answer.

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Speaker 3: But more sides a case of I think we're more

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Speaker 3: I don't know, like experience based something just getting away

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Speaker 3: and spending some time together.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's so true.

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Speaker 1: Our main way of celebrating anything until this year really

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Speaker 1: has been travel and adventure, and you know, you're right,

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Speaker 1: just even a road trip some way local. It doesn't

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Speaker 1: have to be a big overseas trip, but it's just

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Speaker 1: because we work and live at home together in the

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Speaker 1: same place, our main way to sort of acknowledge a

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Speaker 1: difference in our mindset is to physically change where we are.

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Speaker 1: And I found that really hard this year because it's

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Speaker 1: such a port like, it's such an important part of

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Speaker 1: how we make boundaries, and we've just spent years trying

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Speaker 1: to build those boundaries. And that's actually a question we've

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Speaker 1: had that has come up lots of times, which will

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Speaker 1: come to heaps of people, asked how we separate that

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Speaker 1: working relationship from our personal life, and the main way

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Speaker 1: is to physically remove ourselves. So it's been hard this

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Speaker 1: year to not be able to do that, and because

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Speaker 1: we haven't really had anything else to do other than

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Speaker 1: be at home where we work, we've just kept working.

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Speaker 1: And I think, yeah, our boundaries have really been blurred

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Speaker 1: this year, and we've worked a little bit too much,

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Speaker 1: but you know, we've been privileged to have work at

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Speaker 1: all this year. Next question, which also comes up all

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Speaker 1: the time. Grc EPC asked, is pregnancy on the cards? Nick?

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Speaker 2: Are you planning to get pregnant anytime?

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Speaker 3: Floated? I'm just floated. Look, yes, but I mean it's

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Speaker 3: it's got to be the right timing. And I don't

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Speaker 3: think as much as some of our amazing friends have

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Speaker 3: COVID babies or having COVID babies, it's not what I

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Speaker 3: wanted to do.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think because we had otherwise planned to start

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Speaker 1: trying this year, but before we'd actually started COVID happened,

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Speaker 1: we had a little bit more control over than sort

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Speaker 1: of our planning, like our time frame. I mean, you obviously,

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Speaker 1: you know, choose the time and lots of other factors

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Speaker 1: are involved. But a lot of our friends who have

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Speaker 1: had COVID babies started trying before the pandemic, so they

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Speaker 1: have had less control over that. But I think, yeah,

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Speaker 1: for us.

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Speaker 3: What interesting is we were planning on having a few

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Speaker 3: things ticked off prior to prior to it, and I

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Speaker 3: think COVID or kind of made the things that we

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Speaker 3: were wanting to kick off a little bit redundant, Like

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Speaker 3: I don't necessarily need the things that we wanted initially.

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Speaker 1: Like our big thing was our honeymoon, right, Yeah, we

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Speaker 1: had a big trip planned that was sort of not

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Speaker 1: very newborn friendly and quite adventurous, and I think that

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Speaker 1: was one thing we wanted to tick off. But obviously

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Speaker 1: now that's been pushed out a little bit. But we

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Speaker 1: definitely want to have kids at some point, and I

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Speaker 1: think we've both we had that conversation really early. We're

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Speaker 1: also quite open to sort of lots of different ways

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Speaker 1: of building a family. As you all know, I'm adopted

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Speaker 1: and Nick's mum is also adopted. She was the first

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Speaker 1: Asian adopted into Australia, which is such an interesting coincidence.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, I think we're very keen to start a

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Speaker 1: family in whatever form that takes.

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Speaker 2: We'll see what happens.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: MV Media Lab, one of our dear friends and regular

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Speaker 1: followers and cannot think of a username right now, asked

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Speaker 1: what is the best piece of it for your marriage

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Speaker 1: that you got, the worst piece of advice and the

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Speaker 1: best advice on marriage that you would now give to

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Speaker 1: someone else.

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Speaker 2: They are great questions. I reckon the.

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Speaker 1: Best piece of advice I got for the wedding, maybe

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Speaker 1: not for marriage overall, but for the wedding that I

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Speaker 1: have also passed on to every single bride and groom

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Speaker 1: since then, is to take a moment, at least once,

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Speaker 1: but every time you remember on the day to go

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Speaker 1: and find your partner and just step back from the

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Speaker 1: crowd and soak it all up.

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Speaker 2: Because it goes so quick.

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Speaker 1: You're actually apart from each other for a lot of

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Speaker 1: it because you're saying hello to all the guests, and

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Speaker 1: you know, for a good part of the night, I

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Speaker 1: had no idea what it was because we were with

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Speaker 1: family or with friends who had traveled from overseas. So

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Speaker 1: those few times that I remembered to go and grab you,

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Speaker 1: you know, just for us to look at the room

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Speaker 1: and watch everyone. I really appreciated being told to do

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Speaker 1: that because that's how I remember what happened and how

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Speaker 1: special it was.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that was a good point. My best bit of

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Speaker 3: advice on the wedding part. Both of these handss aren't

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Speaker 3: the question, but was from a friend of mine who

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Speaker 3: had just got married, and they said, don't plan your

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Speaker 3: own wedding, as in, don't be the wedding planner on

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Speaker 3: the day or anything like that, so you can just

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Speaker 3: just turn up and enjoy it and whatever happens happens.

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Speaker 3: And that was the best because I was just like, yeah, whatever,

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Speaker 3: Like all these little things that you think about prior

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Speaker 3: to it mean nothing on the day. It's about having

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Speaker 3: all of all of your people in the one spot

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Speaker 3: and marrying the person that you love and want to

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Speaker 3: be there. It's not about the color of your napkin.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: That's another amazing piece of advice I would say, is

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Speaker 1: you're not going to remember all the things that you

403
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Speaker 1: often agonize over for months and months. And obviously it's

404
00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:42,919
Speaker 1: important and exciting to care about the small details, but

405
00:18:42,960 --> 00:18:46,399
Speaker 1: if it crosses over into really causing you anxiety and

406
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Speaker 1: taking the joy out of it, no one's going to

407
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Speaker 1: remember the cutlery or the exact chairs, or you know

408
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Speaker 1: which way the cucumber was folded on top of your ord'rvs.

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Speaker 2: Like all those small details can take away so much joy.

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Speaker 1: So don't let it sort of you know, go too

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Speaker 1: far into into anxiety. Just make sure you're really really

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Speaker 1: enjoying it. I don't think I got any bad advice.

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Speaker 1: I think for marriage generally, the biggest thing would be

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Speaker 1: everyone's marriage is different. What it takes to make two

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Speaker 1: people happy and to live a beautiful and fulfilling life.

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Speaker 1: Everyone's going to strike a different balance. Like the whole

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Speaker 1: point of CZZA is that you're you know your pathway

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Speaker 1: and your joy is meant to look different from other people's.

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Speaker 1: So same as career paths and life paths, the right

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Speaker 1: balance of home and work, or spending time together as

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Speaker 1: as spending time apart or whatever it is. Every couple

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Speaker 1: is going to have different priorities. And also you never

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Speaker 1: know what is going on behind closed doors to know

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Speaker 1: what led them to the decisions they make. So I think,

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Speaker 1: just yeah, like anything else, just put your blinkers on,

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Speaker 1: Like we all have different you know, what makes one

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Speaker 1: marriage work might not work for another.

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Speaker 3: I mean, you just got to learn the other person

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Speaker 3: not be an O think it all sorts of case

430
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Speaker 3: of you just can't be selfish, and I mean you've

431
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Speaker 3: got to remember that you're a team. And once you're

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Speaker 3: a team, treated as a team, and it's all well

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Speaker 3: and good than you find.

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Speaker 1: And I think the best thing that we've ever done

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Speaker 1: as a couple in marriage and also generally is to

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Speaker 1: work on our communication. And I actually I think I

437
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Speaker 1: said this in the first episode last year about how

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Speaker 1: the top three things for a successful long term relationship.

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Speaker 1: One of them was communication. You can combat anything if

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Speaker 1: you can talk about it. And for ages, we had

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Speaker 1: very different love languages and ways of expressing ourselves. And

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Speaker 1: you know, if you don't communicate how you're feeling, it

443
00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:41,320
Speaker 1: just leads to clashes and misunderstandings. But as soon as

444
00:20:41,359 --> 00:20:44,560
Speaker 1: we learn how to interpret each other's different languages. Everyone

445
00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:47,360
Speaker 1: read the Five Love Languages book. It is absolutely amazing.

446
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:52,200
Speaker 1: Nick hasn't read, but I have passed on the main messages.

447
00:20:52,800 --> 00:20:55,040
Speaker 1: But yeah, working on your communication just gives you the

448
00:20:55,119 --> 00:20:58,960
Speaker 1: tools and strategies to be able at work through through

449
00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:02,800
Speaker 1: anything else that might come your way. Another one from

450
00:21:03,160 --> 00:21:06,080
Speaker 1: I cannot think of a year name right now, And Melsie,

451
00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:08,639
Speaker 1: is there anything about the first year of marriage that

452
00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:11,600
Speaker 1: took you by surprise, good or bad? Melsie is getting

453
00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:15,040
Speaker 1: married in eighteen months. Congratulations. I'm so excited for you.

454
00:21:15,119 --> 00:21:17,480
Speaker 1: I'm so excited for all the couples who can finally

455
00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:21,320
Speaker 1: press on with their wedding planning. It's such an exciting time.

456
00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:22,960
Speaker 3: I think what.

457
00:21:22,920 --> 00:21:26,000
Speaker 1: Took me by surprise is that it does feel different.

458
00:21:26,440 --> 00:21:28,679
Speaker 1: I mean, we've been together for ten years. By the

459
00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:31,119
Speaker 1: time we got married, we'd live together for eight of

460
00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:33,320
Speaker 1: those years. You know, I didn't know there was a

461
00:21:33,359 --> 00:21:35,919
Speaker 1: new level. I thought the next level would be children.

462
00:21:36,160 --> 00:21:39,200
Speaker 1: But even though nothing day to day changes, there's something

463
00:21:39,240 --> 00:21:42,120
Speaker 1: really special, Like it's it's sort of lovely to say

464
00:21:42,480 --> 00:21:46,160
Speaker 1: husband or wife, and it's like a security that even

465
00:21:46,160 --> 00:21:48,720
Speaker 1: though you knew before, it's just a new level of

466
00:21:49,280 --> 00:21:51,600
Speaker 1: I don't know, comment commitment to each other.

467
00:21:51,840 --> 00:21:53,800
Speaker 3: The thing that took me by surprise in the first

468
00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:57,160
Speaker 3: year of marriage was a global pandemic to completely change

469
00:21:57,200 --> 00:21:58,040
Speaker 3: everything we planned.

470
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:03,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, also, but it also took me by surprise that

471
00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:05,879
Speaker 1: we didn't suffer at all from being twenty four to

472
00:22:05,920 --> 00:22:09,159
Speaker 1: seven together. You know, we went from one of us

473
00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:11,960
Speaker 1: traveling once a week every week last year pretty much

474
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:16,360
Speaker 1: to being together every second and we didn't really have

475
00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:17,000
Speaker 1: a blow up.

476
00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:21,119
Speaker 3: No. I think that comes down to friendships as well.

477
00:22:21,560 --> 00:22:24,560
Speaker 3: I mess mates, so it's fine. And also I think

478
00:22:24,600 --> 00:22:28,160
Speaker 3: having a business together, and we ran a business together

479
00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:31,439
Speaker 3: for five years, it's business partners. We learned to communicate

480
00:22:31,560 --> 00:22:32,480
Speaker 3: that way as well.

481
00:22:32,560 --> 00:22:38,359
Speaker 1: So Jennifer Abadu asked, what's something new you've discovered about

482
00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:45,240
Speaker 1: each other. I think my biggest lesson about you is

483
00:22:45,359 --> 00:22:50,440
Speaker 1: that we have such different thresholds for work life balance.

484
00:22:51,119 --> 00:22:54,239
Speaker 1: Like I have had chronic fatigue, as everyone knows, and

485
00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:58,000
Speaker 1: I just need more sleep than the average person because

486
00:22:58,040 --> 00:22:58,720
Speaker 1: of anxiety.

487
00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:01,679
Speaker 2: I need a lot of down time. I needs lost sundays.

488
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:04,680
Speaker 1: And I think I knew this already, but particularly now

489
00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:08,920
Speaker 1: spending so much time together, I've just noticed you can

490
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:11,040
Speaker 1: just go and go and go and go and go,

491
00:23:11,560 --> 00:23:13,639
Speaker 1: and I'm sort of waiting for you to have a

492
00:23:13,640 --> 00:23:16,119
Speaker 1: breakdown and be like, you know, if I did that,

493
00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:19,800
Speaker 1: I would totally be incoherent. But you do need your

494
00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:22,840
Speaker 1: daily coffee run and your drive sort of outside out

495
00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:24,760
Speaker 1: of the house to do your calls. But otherwise your

496
00:23:24,800 --> 00:23:26,520
Speaker 1: threshold is yeah, it's pretty.

497
00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:29,120
Speaker 3: Hard, and there's only so many times you can hear

498
00:23:29,600 --> 00:23:31,919
Speaker 3: you in another room going hey, beautiful people.

499
00:23:34,359 --> 00:23:37,640
Speaker 1: I have turned our bedroom into a recording studio. I

500
00:23:37,680 --> 00:23:40,080
Speaker 1: love those quotes of the day. What have you learned

501
00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:41,440
Speaker 1: about me? Anything new?

502
00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:46,040
Speaker 3: I probably saw, Not that I've never doubted your work ethic,

503
00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:49,240
Speaker 3: but because I've seen more of how much goes into

504
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:52,359
Speaker 3: like every of what you do. I mean, we've always

505
00:23:52,400 --> 00:23:55,199
Speaker 3: worked together and I've always respected what you did, but

506
00:23:55,359 --> 00:23:57,320
Speaker 3: seeing how much work goes into a lot of the

507
00:23:57,359 --> 00:24:00,560
Speaker 3: stuff you do, because I'm seeing you working more during

508
00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:02,280
Speaker 3: the day, it's been good to see.

509
00:24:02,600 --> 00:24:08,440
Speaker 1: Oh that's nice. Next question, Amber A. Fick asked any

510
00:24:08,520 --> 00:24:10,880
Speaker 1: new pet peeves since marriage.

511
00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:12,359
Speaker 3: I don't know.

512
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:17,960
Speaker 1: I reckon yours about me is that when you're the

513
00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:21,400
Speaker 1: most tired and you've finished a really long day. Nick

514
00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:23,639
Speaker 1: has this call every Monday night at ten pm because

515
00:24:23,640 --> 00:24:26,240
Speaker 1: of the time zones of everyone on the team, and

516
00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:28,160
Speaker 1: I am supposed to go to sleep before the call,

517
00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:30,760
Speaker 1: but every night, when he finishes and he gets back

518
00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:34,360
Speaker 1: into the room, I'm like, Hi, let's chat, Let's.

519
00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:34,760
Speaker 2: Have a D and M.

520
00:24:35,080 --> 00:24:38,040
Speaker 3: So it's midnight, I've worked since six am, and I've

521
00:24:38,080 --> 00:24:41,560
Speaker 3: just I mean, anyone that does a conference call ties

522
00:24:41,640 --> 00:24:45,320
Speaker 3: you out, and especially this one. Everyone's on different energy

523
00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:47,560
Speaker 3: levels and stuff like that. And it start getting to

524
00:24:47,600 --> 00:24:49,840
Speaker 3: bed and I'm oh, I'll turn around and I'm like,

525
00:24:50,200 --> 00:24:53,000
Speaker 3: I see what are you doing. I'm like, oh my god.

526
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:56,919
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I think your biggest pet peeve of

527
00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:59,159
Speaker 1: me would be how especially when we're in lockdown and

528
00:24:59,200 --> 00:25:00,840
Speaker 1: I'm not out doing so during the day, I have

529
00:25:00,960 --> 00:25:01,639
Speaker 1: all this energy.

530
00:25:01,640 --> 00:25:02,840
Speaker 2: In the middle of the night, no.

531
00:25:02,880 --> 00:25:06,320
Speaker 3: You need the opposite you need You've got no energy

532
00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:08,359
Speaker 3: because you're exhausted because you're working so hard, but you

533
00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:12,760
Speaker 3: just refuse to go to sleep. It's like a toddler.

534
00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:18,320
Speaker 1: Toddler in so many different ways. Oh my god, my

535
00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:20,760
Speaker 1: biggest pet peeve since marriage?

536
00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:21,879
Speaker 2: I don't know.

537
00:25:23,119 --> 00:25:25,200
Speaker 1: I think my pet peeve would only be that you

538
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:28,080
Speaker 1: have pet peeves about me and want me to stop

539
00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:28,680
Speaker 1: being annoying.

540
00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:33,639
Speaker 3: It's very difficult to find a thing about you, and

541
00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:35,040
Speaker 3: that's probably my pet peeves.

542
00:25:35,240 --> 00:25:38,000
Speaker 1: Oh that's really nice. I was about to say that,

543
00:25:38,240 --> 00:25:40,880
Speaker 1: actually mine is probably that you leave your clothes everywhere,

544
00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:42,560
Speaker 1: but I'll take that back.

545
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:45,840
Speaker 3: Pot kettle, champ pot kettle.

546
00:25:47,280 --> 00:25:49,840
Speaker 1: So before we go any further today, one of my

547
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:53,280
Speaker 1: own favorite ways to playta is to travel, and I've

548
00:25:53,320 --> 00:25:57,040
Speaker 1: been missing it so dearly this year, well overseas travel

549
00:25:57,119 --> 00:25:59,320
Speaker 1: might be a while away for us all. I can't

550
00:25:59,440 --> 00:26:03,800
Speaker 1: wait until we can explore domestically. And Banister's Hotel's boutique

551
00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:07,119
Speaker 1: coastal escapes are right up top of my must visit

552
00:26:07,240 --> 00:26:10,359
Speaker 1: list for my new South Wales listeners. You can even

553
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:13,959
Speaker 1: drive yourself to these three stunning locations with white, sandy

554
00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:17,919
Speaker 1: beaches and lush nature surroundings for some coastal r and R,

555
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:20,800
Speaker 1: or make your visit part of a bigger adventure along

556
00:26:20,880 --> 00:26:24,200
Speaker 1: the South Coast or the Hunter Valley. There's Port Stephens,

557
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:27,560
Speaker 1: surrounded by native Kohala habitat by the sea, boasting a

558
00:26:27,680 --> 00:26:31,920
Speaker 1: cliff top day spar and pavilion nestled in the heart

559
00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:36,720
Speaker 1: of coastal Mollymook for the perfect weekend or mid week getaway.

560
00:26:37,520 --> 00:26:40,399
Speaker 1: We have such a beautiful backyard to explore, and this

561
00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:44,240
Speaker 1: area is full of wine tastings, award winning restaurants, shopping

562
00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:49,879
Speaker 1: and breathtaking beaches. Two locations even have dog friendly rooms,

563
00:26:49,920 --> 00:26:53,240
Speaker 1: which Paul was pretty excited to hear. This year has

564
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:56,160
Speaker 1: been full on for him too. Not like you need

565
00:26:56,240 --> 00:26:59,240
Speaker 1: any extra excuses to book in a Banister's Escape. They're

566
00:26:59,280 --> 00:27:03,080
Speaker 1: giving the aber a SPA gift whenever you book using

567
00:27:03,119 --> 00:27:06,520
Speaker 1: the code sees the A book your escape in Now,

568
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:14,240
Speaker 1: I'll pop the link in the episode notes. Next question,

569
00:27:14,840 --> 00:27:19,399
Speaker 1: Sally Graham asked what's the most rewarding part of being married?

570
00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:23,680
Speaker 3: So it's just nice. It's just been able to There's

571
00:27:23,800 --> 00:27:26,600
Speaker 3: something so different saying wife than girlfriend.

572
00:27:27,960 --> 00:27:33,040
Speaker 1: For me, it's that even though everything legally is for

573
00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:36,320
Speaker 1: like the unit or the partnership from I think from

574
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:38,560
Speaker 1: year two or something, in a de facto relationship, you

575
00:27:38,600 --> 00:27:40,879
Speaker 1: can you're considered as if you're married. But it's just

576
00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:45,560
Speaker 1: so lovely that you're officially considered a partnership, like technically

577
00:27:45,800 --> 00:27:49,479
Speaker 1: everything you're building is something you're doing together for your

578
00:27:49,520 --> 00:27:50,240
Speaker 1: life as a couple.

579
00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:52,439
Speaker 2: I just think that's that's really lovely.

580
00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:55,400
Speaker 3: It's something really solid about yeah.

581
00:27:55,640 --> 00:27:59,440
Speaker 1: And also that I finally finally have the same surname

582
00:27:59,520 --> 00:28:02,040
Speaker 1: as my dog at the VET. That's really rewarding for me.

583
00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:08,600
Speaker 1: Charlene McEwan asked what is the hardest thing about being married?

584
00:28:08,720 --> 00:28:12,680
Speaker 1: And Austin Collins, another dear friend and loyal follower, asked

585
00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:15,200
Speaker 1: what the biggest challenge has been in our first year

586
00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:18,479
Speaker 1: and also Celia Mackenzie and married by Nikki. A lot

587
00:28:18,480 --> 00:28:21,080
Speaker 1: of people ask that question. I actually haven't really found

588
00:28:21,080 --> 00:28:21,360
Speaker 1: it that.

589
00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:24,679
Speaker 3: Hard, and I think feel like anything I have to

590
00:28:24,760 --> 00:28:27,360
Speaker 3: that I've answered already. But it's pretty crazy, I think

591
00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:31,400
Speaker 3: been to. I mean, we've we've been together for eleven years.

592
00:28:31,560 --> 00:28:35,680
Speaker 3: It's being married is a title and it's made all

593
00:28:35,680 --> 00:28:38,240
Speaker 3: the positives came from it. It's no real It's not

594
00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:41,480
Speaker 3: like we just started living together or we Yeah. I

595
00:28:41,520 --> 00:28:44,200
Speaker 3: think the biggest changes over this has just been lockdown.

596
00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:45,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree it has.

597
00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:48,160
Speaker 3: The challenges haven't been due to being married, They've been

598
00:28:48,280 --> 00:28:49,640
Speaker 3: due to de pandemic.

599
00:28:49,920 --> 00:28:50,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally.

600
00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:54,600
Speaker 1: I also think if you have become business partners, if

601
00:28:54,600 --> 00:28:57,400
Speaker 1: any long term couples or married couples have already become

602
00:28:57,440 --> 00:29:01,720
Speaker 1: business partners, that process helps you iron out so many

603
00:29:01,800 --> 00:29:04,320
Speaker 1: more things than other couples have ever had to. So

604
00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:11,320
Speaker 1: your threshold tolerance for disagreement or exhaustion or just you know,

605
00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:14,640
Speaker 1: having a brain somewhere else. You've kind of faced every

606
00:29:14,680 --> 00:29:18,080
Speaker 1: major barrier that you know often married couples would otherwise

607
00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:20,520
Speaker 1: have to face in their first year. So we did

608
00:29:20,560 --> 00:29:25,760
Speaker 1: that like five years ago. Now, this is an interesting question.

609
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:29,040
Speaker 1: I don't think we've ever been asked this, but Kamori

610
00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:32,760
Speaker 1: Cloudbear asked, is it true that sex life dies down

611
00:29:32,920 --> 00:29:34,000
Speaker 1: after marriage?

612
00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:37,200
Speaker 3: Again? I take it back to the eleven years thing.

613
00:29:37,520 --> 00:29:40,200
Speaker 3: I mean, marriage didn't change anything like to do with that.

614
00:29:40,280 --> 00:29:42,280
Speaker 3: I don't think I think it's just to do with

615
00:29:43,040 --> 00:29:45,480
Speaker 3: external factors and all that type of stuff. I don't

616
00:29:45,480 --> 00:29:48,240
Speaker 3: think putting a ring on a finger change has anything

617
00:29:48,280 --> 00:29:49,640
Speaker 3: to do with sex life.

618
00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:53,320
Speaker 1: I think, yeah, yeah, I think in any relationship, you know,

619
00:29:53,480 --> 00:29:56,880
Speaker 1: really long term or like marriage, you know, any long

620
00:29:56,960 --> 00:30:00,520
Speaker 1: term relationship, of course, your sex life changes because initial

621
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:03,520
Speaker 1: novelty of being together, and any relationship is going to

622
00:30:03,600 --> 00:30:06,520
Speaker 1: change as you get more comfortable with each other. But

623
00:30:06,560 --> 00:30:09,400
Speaker 1: I also think it gets better because you know each

624
00:30:09,440 --> 00:30:11,600
Speaker 1: other better, you know what each other likes and what

625
00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:14,560
Speaker 1: each other doesn't like, and so I think it's kind

626
00:30:14,600 --> 00:30:16,880
Speaker 1: of yeah, I mean, there are definitely times. I think

627
00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:19,400
Speaker 1: most couples have been through a phase where you start

628
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:21,280
Speaker 1: to get a bit more familiar with each other, and

629
00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:24,280
Speaker 1: it might take a little dip because you take liberties

630
00:30:24,280 --> 00:30:26,640
Speaker 1: you wouldn't take at the start. When you're exhausted or

631
00:30:26,680 --> 00:30:29,280
Speaker 1: burnt out, you might make a little less effort than

632
00:30:29,320 --> 00:30:30,280
Speaker 1: you would at the beginning.

633
00:30:30,360 --> 00:30:33,080
Speaker 3: But again, I completely agree, but I think it's not

634
00:30:33,120 --> 00:30:36,320
Speaker 3: necessarily related to getting married. I think it's just to

635
00:30:36,360 --> 00:30:38,080
Speaker 3: do with like her relationship.

636
00:30:38,240 --> 00:30:40,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it's like anything, you just need to

637
00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:42,120
Speaker 1: need to make an effort, need to make time for

638
00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:44,280
Speaker 1: it and prioritize it if it's important to you, and

639
00:30:45,320 --> 00:30:47,240
Speaker 1: you know, get your gone retriever out of your bedroom

640
00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:52,880
Speaker 1: is really a big factor for me. So heaps of

641
00:30:52,880 --> 00:30:55,120
Speaker 1: people have asked this is the question I mentioned before,

642
00:30:55,520 --> 00:30:57,400
Speaker 1: How do you make time for each other with all

643
00:30:57,520 --> 00:31:03,160
Speaker 1: your projects? De Nino Avary Moon, Rachel Devani, what steps

644
00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:05,680
Speaker 1: do you take to ensure you separate your work life,

645
00:31:05,760 --> 00:31:09,280
Speaker 1: your social life, and your married life. That has only

646
00:31:09,360 --> 00:31:13,440
Speaker 1: happened by setting boundaries, particularly in lockdown, because we don't

647
00:31:13,440 --> 00:31:14,800
Speaker 1: have many spaces to go.

648
00:31:15,560 --> 00:31:15,800
Speaker 2: You know.

649
00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:18,560
Speaker 1: Before our way of doing that was literally going away

650
00:31:18,600 --> 00:31:21,280
Speaker 1: as we mentioned and having holiday time versus at home

651
00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:23,920
Speaker 1: working time, or going out to dinner or leaving the

652
00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:26,160
Speaker 1: house to go to a movie. So that was like

653
00:31:26,320 --> 00:31:29,480
Speaker 1: rest time versus just sitting at home. But yeah, it's

654
00:31:29,480 --> 00:31:30,200
Speaker 1: definitely hard.

655
00:31:30,760 --> 00:31:34,000
Speaker 3: The other hard thing for Sarah and I is I've

656
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:36,840
Speaker 3: got businesses on different time zone, so I've got a

657
00:31:36,880 --> 00:31:39,520
Speaker 3: lot of very early starts and very late finishes and

658
00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:42,240
Speaker 3: stuff like that that kind of cut into personal time.

659
00:31:42,600 --> 00:31:44,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, we just I think the week for us is

660
00:31:44,960 --> 00:31:47,560
Speaker 1: so hard to predict. So it's more like the weekend

661
00:31:47,720 --> 00:31:49,840
Speaker 1: is our time where we try and really commit to

662
00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:52,120
Speaker 1: walking the dog without our phones.

663
00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:54,000
Speaker 2: We do the crosswd puzzle.

664
00:31:54,280 --> 00:31:57,040
Speaker 1: Like we have little traditions of things that we do

665
00:31:57,120 --> 00:31:58,040
Speaker 1: when we're not in lockdown.

666
00:31:58,160 --> 00:32:01,000
Speaker 2: We go out for breakfast. We to do the crossword

667
00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:02,320
Speaker 2: puzzle for a couple of hours.

668
00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:05,320
Speaker 3: We just changed to doing in the backyard. So he

669
00:32:05,360 --> 00:32:06,760
Speaker 3: didn't change anything, but you.

670
00:32:06,720 --> 00:32:08,480
Speaker 1: Know, we know that those are the days that we

671
00:32:08,520 --> 00:32:12,280
Speaker 1: set aside for reading or doing house rehnos or you know,

672
00:32:12,320 --> 00:32:13,120
Speaker 1: pottering around.

673
00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:16,560
Speaker 2: MV Media Lab has another question.

674
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:21,960
Speaker 1: Do you help it out each other with housework like cooking, shopping, cleaning, laundry,

675
00:32:21,960 --> 00:32:24,960
Speaker 1: And if yes, how do you organize who enjoys doing what?

676
00:32:25,480 --> 00:32:28,280
Speaker 1: That's such an interesting one. I always find it fascinating

677
00:32:28,320 --> 00:32:30,720
Speaker 1: who ends up doing what in a couple. And I

678
00:32:30,760 --> 00:32:34,600
Speaker 1: think it comes back again to every couple having different

679
00:32:34,640 --> 00:32:38,480
Speaker 1: divisions depending on what suits each person. And it's just,

680
00:32:38,600 --> 00:32:40,720
Speaker 1: you know, over the years, I think we've fallen into

681
00:32:40,720 --> 00:32:44,760
Speaker 1: different roles, not because of anything other than who's in

682
00:32:44,800 --> 00:32:47,760
Speaker 1: the right position, or who likes doing things more, who's

683
00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:48,280
Speaker 1: better at it?

684
00:32:48,360 --> 00:32:50,760
Speaker 3: You know, I just think it gets done. It just

685
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:52,160
Speaker 3: gets done what magically?

686
00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:55,880
Speaker 2: No, I mean like like by me.

687
00:32:57,640 --> 00:32:58,480
Speaker 3: And all that type of stuff.

688
00:32:58,560 --> 00:33:00,240
Speaker 2: No, I know we're really good, but.

689
00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:03,640
Speaker 3: It's also like there's no resentment in doing anything because

690
00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:05,880
Speaker 3: I mean, you know what I mean, like, yeah.

691
00:33:05,640 --> 00:33:07,920
Speaker 1: There's not really a clear delineation. We just kind of

692
00:33:07,960 --> 00:33:10,960
Speaker 1: both step in. Yeah whenever I think it's a really good,

693
00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:17,240
Speaker 1: nice division. So hij Underscore asked how has lockdown been.

694
00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:21,320
Speaker 1: Leisure Chick asked whether it changed the dynamic of our marriage,

695
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:25,560
Speaker 1: and Ashpholek asked if it revealed anything about the other.

696
00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:28,160
Speaker 1: I feel like we've kind of covered some of this,

697
00:33:28,480 --> 00:33:32,480
Speaker 1: but we've generally been very, very lucky to have kept

698
00:33:32,520 --> 00:33:34,240
Speaker 1: a lot of our work, which has given us a

699
00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:36,640
Speaker 1: lot of sense of purpose and structure to the day,

700
00:33:36,680 --> 00:33:39,040
Speaker 1: which has made it a lot easier to stay focused

701
00:33:39,800 --> 00:33:43,040
Speaker 1: and were used to spending twenty four seven together.

702
00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:46,000
Speaker 2: So yeah, that's not really been a trouble.

703
00:33:46,280 --> 00:33:48,880
Speaker 3: The biggest struggle with lockdown for us has more been

704
00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:52,960
Speaker 3: there so as we probably notice, we both worked very

705
00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:55,640
Speaker 3: very hard and work crazy hours, and we do that

706
00:33:56,200 --> 00:34:00,280
Speaker 3: and not the nine to five because we enjoy the

707
00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:03,600
Speaker 3: other things, like the flexibility to travel and work from anywhere,

708
00:34:03,680 --> 00:34:07,280
Speaker 3: to just go and chuck it in the fucking bucket

709
00:34:07,320 --> 00:34:10,359
Speaker 3: and go and for me, go and play golf or

710
00:34:10,400 --> 00:34:13,560
Speaker 3: go for a surf or just go down the coast

711
00:34:13,760 --> 00:34:17,880
Speaker 3: or like they sound super super extravagant, but they're not

712
00:34:18,040 --> 00:34:20,960
Speaker 3: because I work so hard and I don't have a

713
00:34:21,080 --> 00:34:24,160
Speaker 3: fixed salary like in the nine to five or holiday

714
00:34:24,160 --> 00:34:26,200
Speaker 3: pay all this type of stuff, and I work the

715
00:34:26,239 --> 00:34:29,360
Speaker 3: way I work so I can have that as my

716
00:34:29,520 --> 00:34:32,719
Speaker 3: rewards and right now I don't have any of that.

717
00:34:32,920 --> 00:34:36,480
Speaker 3: And that's super super first war problem. But that's been

718
00:34:36,600 --> 00:34:39,200
Speaker 3: something that's been actually hard in Lockdown. Not a case

719
00:34:39,239 --> 00:34:41,440
Speaker 3: of if just say Lockdown wasn't here, I probably wouldn't

720
00:34:41,440 --> 00:34:44,760
Speaker 3: do anything, yea, but knowing you can't is really difficult.

721
00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:47,360
Speaker 3: And also, I mean, I feel really bad for a

722
00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:50,200
Speaker 3: lot of my clients and customers that are hurting, so

723
00:34:50,280 --> 00:34:55,160
Speaker 3: I've been helping them out a lot, and our workloads

724
00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:58,680
Speaker 3: are probably four times what it normally is because of that.

725
00:34:59,680 --> 00:35:02,799
Speaker 3: Then a number of clients have gone under and well,

726
00:35:02,840 --> 00:35:05,320
Speaker 3: owing a significant number of amount of money. And it's

727
00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:07,560
Speaker 3: it's not their fault. I mean, no one could have

728
00:35:07,719 --> 00:35:10,440
Speaker 3: predicted this, but it's got to run on effect. I've

729
00:35:10,440 --> 00:35:13,960
Speaker 3: still going to pay my guys, so that has an

730
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:16,520
Speaker 3: effect on your relationship and stuff like that as well.

731
00:35:16,560 --> 00:35:19,800
Speaker 3: But the advantage is we've seen each other over eleven

732
00:35:19,880 --> 00:35:22,040
Speaker 3: years go through ups and downs and stuff like that.

733
00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:26,799
Speaker 3: So everything and also I've been through this before, Like

734
00:35:26,920 --> 00:35:30,760
Speaker 3: I mean, it's not will not this obviously, but everything

735
00:35:30,760 --> 00:35:32,759
Speaker 3: comes in around about sort of bounce back. You've just

736
00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:35,719
Speaker 3: got to try and avoid this negativity that's in the air.

737
00:35:36,400 --> 00:35:39,560
Speaker 3: There's so much negativity, so much fear. We've just got

738
00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:41,480
Speaker 3: to kind of put blinkers on and just try and

739
00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:44,840
Speaker 3: get through it. And we've been together for eleven years,

740
00:35:44,960 --> 00:35:47,279
Speaker 3: so we know how to read each other, we know

741
00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:49,720
Speaker 3: how to deal with that type of stuff.

742
00:35:49,760 --> 00:35:52,680
Speaker 1: And yeah, I think one of our biggest things has

743
00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:58,399
Speaker 1: been the whole idea that the trade off of not

744
00:35:58,440 --> 00:36:01,640
Speaker 1: having the security and stability is the benefit of flexibility.

745
00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:05,440
Speaker 1: And so without being able to use that flexibility to

746
00:36:05,440 --> 00:36:07,719
Speaker 1: blow up steam, it's been really hard to have an

747
00:36:07,719 --> 00:36:10,040
Speaker 1: incentive to stop working. And I feel like we just

748
00:36:10,080 --> 00:36:13,080
Speaker 1: spent so much of the past few years learning to

749
00:36:13,120 --> 00:36:17,439
Speaker 1: really identify the activities that we can do to playta

750
00:36:17,560 --> 00:36:20,200
Speaker 1: in Cza language. You know, I've spent so much time

751
00:36:20,239 --> 00:36:23,919
Speaker 1: figuring out how to unwind and what those activities are,

752
00:36:23,960 --> 00:36:25,839
Speaker 1: and then suddenly we couldn't do any of them.

753
00:36:25,920 --> 00:36:27,000
Speaker 2: So it's been a.

754
00:36:26,960 --> 00:36:30,000
Speaker 1: Really big learning curve to figure out how we find

755
00:36:30,120 --> 00:36:33,200
Speaker 1: joy again, and not just joy, but how we disconnect

756
00:36:33,239 --> 00:36:36,440
Speaker 1: from work when we're living in our office. Yeah, I

757
00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:40,120
Speaker 1: think that's been hard for both of us. And like

758
00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:42,000
Speaker 1: Nick said, you know, not being able to travel is

759
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:45,279
Speaker 1: such a first world problem, but it's also we're not

760
00:36:45,280 --> 00:36:47,880
Speaker 1: necessarily talking and going overseas. I mean, it's just anything

761
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:50,640
Speaker 1: more than twenty five k's away just going to the

762
00:36:50,680 --> 00:36:54,160
Speaker 1: country and getting some nature, and we just love adventure

763
00:36:54,200 --> 00:36:57,440
Speaker 1: and it's such a shared common love of something we

764
00:36:57,480 --> 00:36:59,800
Speaker 1: love to do together and a way we express ourselves

765
00:36:59,800 --> 00:37:02,320
Speaker 1: as a couple. So yeah, it's it's been.

766
00:37:02,120 --> 00:37:06,400
Speaker 3: Interesting, and that my answers sounded a very very personal

767
00:37:06,480 --> 00:37:08,920
Speaker 3: problem and very much personal, but it was more a

768
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:10,719
Speaker 3: personal response to it. I mean, if you look at

769
00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:14,359
Speaker 3: businesses and me, our business in America got just hurt

770
00:37:14,480 --> 00:37:18,040
Speaker 3: so hard by department stores closing. We've got a cafe that.

771
00:37:18,560 --> 00:37:20,920
Speaker 3: I mean, anyone has seen anything to do with the

772
00:37:20,920 --> 00:37:24,040
Speaker 3: hospitality industry knows what that situation's like. And a lot

773
00:37:24,080 --> 00:37:27,839
Speaker 3: of our clients have fitness and that again, so we've

774
00:37:27,840 --> 00:37:30,360
Speaker 3: been hit hard by it, but it's more a case

775
00:37:30,400 --> 00:37:34,600
Speaker 3: of what the personal deprivation of the reason I work

776
00:37:34,680 --> 00:37:37,839
Speaker 3: the way I do has been the hardest part, in

777
00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:40,960
Speaker 3: my opinion, way harder than any financial loss.

778
00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:42,200
Speaker 2: Yeah.

779
00:37:42,440 --> 00:37:45,560
Speaker 1: Sarmac o one and Alisha Renee asked when did you

780
00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:49,760
Speaker 1: know they were the one? And mcgavey Emily asked, first

781
00:37:49,800 --> 00:37:50,960
Speaker 1: impression of each other?

782
00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:54,560
Speaker 3: Well, I thought you were the one very early, just

783
00:37:54,600 --> 00:37:56,680
Speaker 3: because of how well we got along. I could quite

784
00:37:56,760 --> 00:38:01,719
Speaker 3: easily see myself spending my life with you because we

785
00:38:01,719 --> 00:38:03,960
Speaker 3: were friends straight away. I mean, obviously it was very

786
00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:06,120
Speaker 3: attracted to you, but I mean it's more a case of, like,

787
00:38:06,480 --> 00:38:09,640
Speaker 3: it's how we were best friends from like day one.

788
00:38:09,960 --> 00:38:12,879
Speaker 1: The fact that I went away for six weeks after

789
00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:16,760
Speaker 1: we've been together for half that time, and we spoke

790
00:38:16,960 --> 00:38:19,560
Speaker 1: every day, And that was when there was no roaming

791
00:38:19,640 --> 00:38:21,560
Speaker 1: or anything on your phone. I had to actually call

792
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:24,520
Speaker 1: you from a payphone with those international calling cards that

793
00:38:24,560 --> 00:38:28,319
Speaker 1: had credit on them. Do you remember those? I spent

794
00:38:28,480 --> 00:38:31,799
Speaker 1: so much money calling you. But I think you know,

795
00:38:32,080 --> 00:38:34,640
Speaker 1: when I wanted to call you every single day, I

796
00:38:34,680 --> 00:38:36,160
Speaker 1: was like, oh, that's weird.

797
00:38:36,440 --> 00:38:37,440
Speaker 2: It was kind of good.

798
00:38:39,000 --> 00:38:43,879
Speaker 3: Good decisions. Yeah, I look really like I didn't think

799
00:38:43,920 --> 00:38:46,839
Speaker 3: that it was going to be a thing after China, Like,

800
00:38:47,280 --> 00:38:49,080
Speaker 3: but then every day I wanted to call you or

801
00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:51,279
Speaker 3: talk to and how it is what it is.

802
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:56,960
Speaker 1: Jessica Baby asked another interesting question, which we've also never

803
00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:59,520
Speaker 1: been asked before. I don't think have you ever come

804
00:38:59,640 --> 00:39:01,040
Speaker 1: close to breaking up?

805
00:39:01,400 --> 00:39:03,600
Speaker 3: We were going to break up before we went to Paris.

806
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:07,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, So I had two exchanges when I was at

807
00:39:07,520 --> 00:39:10,360
Speaker 1: Uni and when we first met. It was the worst

808
00:39:10,440 --> 00:39:14,120
Speaker 1: timing for a relationship. I had studied languages in my

809
00:39:14,320 --> 00:39:16,840
Speaker 1: arts degree, in the art side of my arts law degree,

810
00:39:16,920 --> 00:39:19,920
Speaker 1: and I had an exchange in China, the first one

811
00:39:19,920 --> 00:39:22,279
Speaker 1: that we talked about. So six weeks after we met

812
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:23,560
Speaker 1: together for three weeks.

813
00:39:23,719 --> 00:39:24,600
Speaker 2: Then I came home.

814
00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:28,240
Speaker 1: We had like five months together, but then we already

815
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:31,160
Speaker 1: knew I was going away to study in Paris for

816
00:39:31,239 --> 00:39:34,239
Speaker 1: six or seven months. So it was a recipe for

817
00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:36,680
Speaker 1: disaster in terms of a long term relationship.

818
00:39:36,760 --> 00:39:39,440
Speaker 3: And I was and we've both gotten out of a

819
00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:41,319
Speaker 3: long term relationship and.

820
00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:43,000
Speaker 1: I was going to Europe. I was like, I'm going

821
00:39:43,000 --> 00:39:47,040
Speaker 1: on exchange in Europe. I want to be single. And

822
00:39:47,080 --> 00:39:50,319
Speaker 1: then you turned up at the airport and I was like, oh,

823
00:39:50,360 --> 00:39:52,919
Speaker 1: I think that was actually probably the moment where I thought, oh,

824
00:39:53,320 --> 00:39:55,399
Speaker 1: we're going to make it through this. He's come all

825
00:39:55,400 --> 00:39:58,680
Speaker 1: the way here. Yeah, so we came close to breaking

826
00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:01,160
Speaker 1: up then. I don't even know if we were kind

827
00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:03,400
Speaker 1: of Facebook official before I left, so maybe we couldn't

828
00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:06,759
Speaker 1: even have broken up, But yeah, I was so hesitant.

829
00:40:07,680 --> 00:40:10,759
Speaker 1: And I think over eleven years, if you haven't come

830
00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:12,839
Speaker 1: close to breaking up at some point.

831
00:40:12,760 --> 00:40:14,080
Speaker 3: You haven't pushed the boundaries, 't it.

832
00:40:14,800 --> 00:40:15,160
Speaker 2: Yeah?

833
00:40:15,280 --> 00:40:17,960
Speaker 1: Or if you haven't, I mean, it's probably something that

834
00:40:18,040 --> 00:40:21,200
Speaker 1: you might encounter and that's what makes you stronger though.

835
00:40:21,440 --> 00:40:25,080
Speaker 1: It's going through those phases where all the toughest times

836
00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:27,120
Speaker 1: of our relationship has made us who we are. It's

837
00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:29,720
Speaker 1: not when it was cruisy, it's when it was harder,

838
00:40:29,840 --> 00:40:32,400
Speaker 1: and it made us not just not just being a

839
00:40:32,440 --> 00:40:35,160
Speaker 1: relationship because we've wanted the comfort or the familiarity or

840
00:40:35,160 --> 00:40:38,480
Speaker 1: the habit. It gives you a chance to choose to

841
00:40:38,520 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 1: be where you are and choose.

842
00:40:39,920 --> 00:40:40,680
Speaker 2: To work on it.

843
00:40:40,760 --> 00:40:43,399
Speaker 1: And of course, over eleven years has been really hard

844
00:40:43,400 --> 00:40:46,360
Speaker 1: stuff to work through. We've been through so many different chapters.

845
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:48,799
Speaker 1: I mean, I was a UNI student when we first met.

846
00:40:48,840 --> 00:40:51,040
Speaker 1: I've been through so many careers since. And of course

847
00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:53,160
Speaker 1: we've changed as people in that time.

848
00:40:53,080 --> 00:40:57,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, for sure. I mean I mean you were twenty nineteen.

849
00:40:57,520 --> 00:40:59,839
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like, it's so natural for you to change who

850
00:40:59,840 --> 00:41:01,960
Speaker 1: you are and kind of veer away from each other

851
00:41:01,960 --> 00:41:05,399
Speaker 1: and back together, and then you either choose to come

852
00:41:05,440 --> 00:41:08,560
Speaker 1: back together or you don't. And we've just consistently evolved

853
00:41:08,680 --> 00:41:12,640
Speaker 1: in compatible ways in ways that then we've chosen to

854
00:41:12,719 --> 00:41:13,439
Speaker 1: kind of make it.

855
00:41:13,360 --> 00:41:16,439
Speaker 3: Work, and we've done the work as well.

856
00:41:16,600 --> 00:41:18,120
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, we love therapy.

857
00:41:19,400 --> 00:41:19,920
Speaker 3: I love it.

858
00:41:21,040 --> 00:41:24,160
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, Laura j eight nine to eight. How

859
00:41:24,200 --> 00:41:28,640
Speaker 1: to work as a team and compromise I think sometimes,

860
00:41:29,000 --> 00:41:32,360
Speaker 1: I mean, even as a staunch feminist in some areas,

861
00:41:32,440 --> 00:41:36,200
Speaker 1: I think that doesn't preclude acknowledging that you're in a partnership.

862
00:41:36,320 --> 00:41:39,799
Speaker 1: And it's important that if you're going to live as

863
00:41:39,840 --> 00:41:42,080
Speaker 1: a team, you live your life as a team, and

864
00:41:42,160 --> 00:41:45,719
Speaker 1: you have to compromise to make sure that both of

865
00:41:45,760 --> 00:41:47,759
Speaker 1: your needs are getting met. You know, you can be

866
00:41:47,800 --> 00:41:50,080
Speaker 1: an independent woman and have your own career and your

867
00:41:50,120 --> 00:41:54,439
Speaker 1: independent identity, but you also have an identity within your relationship,

868
00:41:55,040 --> 00:41:58,600
Speaker 1: and that does involve making compromises. I mean not anti

869
00:41:58,600 --> 00:42:03,560
Speaker 1: feminist compromises, but I mean, like in any relationship, including friendships.

870
00:42:03,800 --> 00:42:07,160
Speaker 1: There's give and take and just having so much empathy

871
00:42:07,400 --> 00:42:10,120
Speaker 1: and patience for each other and being able to compromise

872
00:42:10,160 --> 00:42:12,319
Speaker 1: on what you want most or needs sometimes so that

873
00:42:12,360 --> 00:42:13,960
Speaker 1: you can both get a little bit of what you

874
00:42:14,000 --> 00:42:14,640
Speaker 1: want or need.

875
00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:16,359
Speaker 3: Or I'd agree with that.

876
00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:20,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, Married by Niki. Three tips for maintaining a healthy

877
00:42:20,719 --> 00:42:24,040
Speaker 1: and happy relationship. Get a golden retriever and call him Paul.

878
00:42:24,280 --> 00:42:31,879
Speaker 1: Number one just always open communication. Yeah, I think open

879
00:42:31,920 --> 00:42:35,400
Speaker 1: communication is really hard. It's hard to say stuff that

880
00:42:35,520 --> 00:42:37,480
Speaker 1: might hurt the other one or that you think is

881
00:42:37,520 --> 00:42:41,360
Speaker 1: inconvenient or that will cause change and sort of chaos.

882
00:42:41,440 --> 00:42:44,880
Speaker 1: And I mean, I'm a self sacrificer in all my

883
00:42:45,000 --> 00:42:47,640
Speaker 1: relationships and it isn't always good for me. So I've

884
00:42:47,640 --> 00:42:50,120
Speaker 1: had to learn to say things I don't want to

885
00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:52,919
Speaker 1: say sometimes. But I think the more open we've been

886
00:42:53,000 --> 00:42:55,879
Speaker 1: with communication, the better we've been.

887
00:42:56,160 --> 00:43:01,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, And also remember that everyone's different. The way everyone's

888
00:43:01,719 --> 00:43:05,600
Speaker 3: personality is different, everyone's triggers different, everyone's way we're dealing

889
00:43:05,640 --> 00:43:10,880
Speaker 3: with an argument, and like everyone's way of dealing with

890
00:43:11,360 --> 00:43:15,200
Speaker 3: sorrow or happiness or all this type of stuff is different,

891
00:43:15,239 --> 00:43:17,920
Speaker 3: and you've got to learn what the other person's is

892
00:43:18,000 --> 00:43:20,839
Speaker 3: I mean, Sarah and are very very different, like very

893
00:43:20,920 --> 00:43:25,000
Speaker 3: very different. So the way that we if we have

894
00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:28,520
Speaker 3: an argument, the way I react half an hour later

895
00:43:28,719 --> 00:43:31,800
Speaker 3: after it's sorted versus the way Sarah does is different.

896
00:43:32,080 --> 00:43:34,319
Speaker 3: I can be like hey, in all bubbly half an

897
00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:37,400
Speaker 3: hour later. It takes Sarah at least three to six weeks.

898
00:43:37,920 --> 00:43:43,799
Speaker 3: And so you've just got to deal with it. I mean,

899
00:43:43,840 --> 00:43:48,680
Speaker 3: it's just got to understand everyone's different and not necessarily change,

900
00:43:48,920 --> 00:43:53,360
Speaker 3: but work out it's compromised. Everything's got to be compromised. Yeah,

901
00:43:53,600 --> 00:43:55,000
Speaker 3: otherwise it will just fall upon.

902
00:43:55,200 --> 00:43:58,040
Speaker 1: And I think the third thing that's helped us enormously

903
00:43:58,480 --> 00:44:01,440
Speaker 1: is that we're friends. Well, like a lot of couples

904
00:44:01,440 --> 00:44:04,160
Speaker 1: aren't friends. They don't put time into being friends. And

905
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:06,680
Speaker 1: if you have a friendship, I mean other things like

906
00:44:06,760 --> 00:44:11,680
Speaker 1: passion and lust and all those things, they're more fleeting. Yeah,

907
00:44:11,719 --> 00:44:14,839
Speaker 1: so true friendship and love and respect for each other.

908
00:44:15,200 --> 00:44:17,400
Speaker 1: You know, our friendship is first, Like most of the

909
00:44:17,400 --> 00:44:21,120
Speaker 1: time we're just cackling hysterically like best mates. And that's

910
00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:24,640
Speaker 1: how we started, just like laughing and being stupid. And

911
00:44:25,440 --> 00:44:27,879
Speaker 1: I think we've both allowed each other to shed all

912
00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:29,759
Speaker 1: the layers of people we were trying to be when

913
00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:32,040
Speaker 1: we first met each other, which is part of being

914
00:44:32,200 --> 00:44:34,960
Speaker 1: you know, in your twenties, and like you, spend a

915
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:36,960
Speaker 1: lot of your time and your life being someone else.

916
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:39,440
Speaker 1: But we both allowed each other and given each other

917
00:44:39,480 --> 00:44:43,200
Speaker 1: permission to be our true weird selves. I put of

918
00:44:43,200 --> 00:44:45,520
Speaker 1: a quote a doctors who's quote on Instagram the other

919
00:44:45,600 --> 00:44:47,320
Speaker 1: day about falling in mutual weirdness.

920
00:44:47,960 --> 00:44:49,320
Speaker 2: It's yeah, it's amazing.

921
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:51,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly agree.

922
00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:54,960
Speaker 1: And one of the last questions, what do you love

923
00:44:55,040 --> 00:44:58,000
Speaker 1: most about each other? I love your sense of humor.

924
00:44:58,840 --> 00:45:02,240
Speaker 1: I love that you have single handedly opened my eyes

925
00:45:02,320 --> 00:45:05,480
Speaker 1: to spontaneity and adventure when I used to be a

926
00:45:05,600 --> 00:45:11,839
Speaker 1: very very rigid, certainty loving, legal brained person. And I

927
00:45:11,880 --> 00:45:14,440
Speaker 1: love the way that your friends speak about you, that

928
00:45:14,480 --> 00:45:18,120
Speaker 1: you're such a giving and generous friend. Hearing your speeches

929
00:45:18,160 --> 00:45:20,480
Speaker 1: about you at our wedding just it just made me

930
00:45:20,600 --> 00:45:21,359
Speaker 1: so proud of you.

931
00:45:21,840 --> 00:45:27,480
Speaker 3: It's very nice. I love your brain and is very

932
00:45:27,600 --> 00:45:31,279
Speaker 3: very incredible. I mean, people that don't know that well

933
00:45:31,280 --> 00:45:33,640
Speaker 3: don't realize just how intelligent you are because of your

934
00:45:33,680 --> 00:45:37,600
Speaker 3: so bubbly and like play up to the silly things

935
00:45:37,600 --> 00:45:42,640
Speaker 3: you do rather than understanding just how incredibly intelligent you are.

936
00:45:44,320 --> 00:45:48,439
Speaker 3: Your empathy is incredible to a fault, which I love

937
00:45:48,560 --> 00:45:51,440
Speaker 3: about you and also want to strangle you because of it.

938
00:45:51,520 --> 00:45:55,040
Speaker 3: Sometimes pit through someone you're so like you can't deal

939
00:45:55,080 --> 00:45:58,320
Speaker 3: with someone. Any of our friends that are either upset

940
00:45:58,360 --> 00:46:02,279
Speaker 3: about something, they know that Sarah's there for them and

941
00:46:02,640 --> 00:46:06,200
Speaker 3: me obviously, but like it's the case of my empathy goes.

942
00:46:06,239 --> 00:46:08,279
Speaker 3: I want to try and help them and help them

943
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:10,560
Speaker 3: fix something or do it. Whereas you take it on

944
00:46:10,760 --> 00:46:13,040
Speaker 3: as such like a you take it on as like

945
00:46:13,239 --> 00:46:16,399
Speaker 3: your pain sometimes as well like and it's it's quite

946
00:46:16,440 --> 00:46:19,719
Speaker 3: a beautiful thing. And the last thing which I love

947
00:46:19,719 --> 00:46:22,920
Speaker 3: and hate about you is your silly self and your

948
00:46:22,920 --> 00:46:27,120
Speaker 3: weirdness and your out witness and your energy because I

949
00:46:27,160 --> 00:46:29,799
Speaker 3: love it because it is just amazing, But I hate

950
00:46:29,800 --> 00:46:33,200
Speaker 3: it because your energy one days like right, and then

951
00:46:33,320 --> 00:46:35,600
Speaker 3: next day like I'm going to sleep, and it's always

952
00:46:35,640 --> 00:46:37,120
Speaker 3: going to sleep when I need you to help do

953
00:46:37,320 --> 00:46:41,000
Speaker 3: something in the yard. No, but yeah, I love it

954
00:46:41,040 --> 00:46:43,560
Speaker 3: about it. You've got the yeah. And I think that's

955
00:46:43,600 --> 00:46:44,960
Speaker 3: why we're so beautifully matched.

956
00:46:45,239 --> 00:46:48,320
Speaker 1: Well, that's a beautiful way to end our anniversary episode.

957
00:46:48,560 --> 00:46:51,400
Speaker 1: Among all the bagging each other out, we clearly have

958
00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:53,359
Speaker 1: some lovely things to say as well.

959
00:46:53,400 --> 00:46:54,480
Speaker 2: That was so nice.

960
00:46:54,760 --> 00:46:57,120
Speaker 1: Thank you guys so much again for giving us a

961
00:46:57,160 --> 00:47:00,480
Speaker 1: reason to do it, for submitting your questions joining, and

962
00:47:00,520 --> 00:47:04,120
Speaker 1: for always just being such a wonderful part of the neighborhood.

963
00:47:04,520 --> 00:47:07,440
Speaker 1: I'm so excited for the next couple of weeks, what

964
00:47:07,480 --> 00:47:10,200
Speaker 1: we have coming out for the festive season, the next

965
00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:12,560
Speaker 1: couple of episodes that we've got lined up, so stay

966
00:47:12,600 --> 00:47:15,719
Speaker 1: tuned as always. Hope you guys are having a wonderful

967
00:47:15,800 --> 00:47:25,200
Speaker 1: day and seizing your yay