WEBVTT - 'Can I Just Bitch For A Sec?'

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<v Speaker 1>You're listening to a MoMA mea podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>Mamma Mere acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters

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<v Speaker 2>that this podcast is recorded on. Are we Ready?

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<v Speaker 1>We are?

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<v Speaker 2>Jesse Stevens, Yes, three two one, Hello, and welcome to

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<v Speaker 2>Mom and Me Are out Loud. It's all women are

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<v Speaker 2>actually talking about. On Wednesday, the tenth of July.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm Holly Wayne.

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<v Speaker 4>Right, I'm Me Friedman, and I'm Jesse Stevens and out louders.

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<v Speaker 4>If you're listening to this episode, I poll you're listening

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<v Speaker 4>on Spotify. It has come to our attention that a

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<v Speaker 4>great many of you do not follow us, and that

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<v Speaker 4>means that the episode does not automatically go.

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<v Speaker 1>Into your feature. Who would be one of those people?

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<v Speaker 4>Jesse Stevens, Holly and I are that personality type, so

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<v Speaker 4>probably as Sagittarius.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, this was a very strange conversation for me to

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<v Speaker 1>have because I don't understand how you listen to a

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<v Speaker 1>podcast if you're not following it. I go and search

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<v Speaker 1>it every time you want to listen to a podcast. Look.

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<v Speaker 2>Also, my Spotify has on the front page it'll say

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<v Speaker 2>your show's new episodes. I don't need to do that,

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<v Speaker 2>but however that you do talking gates myself.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, so what you.

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<v Speaker 4>Need to do is you've said and then in the

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<v Speaker 4>top right hand corner on Apple I know it says

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<v Speaker 4>follow and you can click the follow button. And on

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<v Speaker 4>Spotify it's exactly the same. It's the word that says follow.

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<v Speaker 4>It has six letters wow, and it starts with air.

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<v Speaker 1>This is great and then tap it. Where do I

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<v Speaker 1>put my ear buds my air pods? Which holes do

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<v Speaker 1>they go?

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<v Speaker 2>In podcasting? Okay, okay, so we've started with the ear

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<v Speaker 2>buds in the vagina On Wednesday show, I Am going

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<v Speaker 2>to get this train.

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<v Speaker 1>Back on the tracks baby.

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<v Speaker 2>On today's show, why absolutely everybody is talking about a

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<v Speaker 2>major Australian fashion brands body count. Also does an adult

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<v Speaker 2>child get us say? And who their mom dates? Welcome

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<v Speaker 2>to the new age of endless parenting. And people are

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<v Speaker 2>posting strangers gossip sessions on TikTok and someone really needs

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<v Speaker 2>to tell Sarah that her friends hate her. But first

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<v Speaker 2>mea Friedman in.

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<v Speaker 1>Case you missed it, meant are raw dogging on flights?

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<v Speaker 2>That sounds I think it's not.

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<v Speaker 1>What you think.

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<v Speaker 4>Dogging flights. I don't think we're doing on flights is

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<v Speaker 4>quite accurate.

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<v Speaker 1>What do you think real dogging means?

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<v Speaker 4>This is I've heard young people use it, and I've

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<v Speaker 4>wanted to say, I don't think you fully understand what

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<v Speaker 4>does so? Because doesn't it mean having sex without a condo? Yes,

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<v Speaker 4>that's what I'm meaning.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Also bear backing. But this word, this phrase, this term,

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<v Speaker 1>this idea has been co opted for a different and

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<v Speaker 1>yet related meaning. Let me explain, raw dogging flying, raw

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<v Speaker 1>or bearbacking on a flight refers to sitting there through

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<v Speaker 1>the whole flight without any form of entertainment or stimulation

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<v Speaker 1>or distraction to help the time pass. So no podcasts,

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<v Speaker 1>no reading, no watching a movie, no watching a TV show.

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<v Speaker 1>All you're allowed to do is watch the flight path map.

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<v Speaker 1>That's as exciting as it gets.

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<v Speaker 4>It's a sign of psychopath Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>So a twenty six year old guy from London called

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<v Speaker 1>west Re simply went viral for the concept because he

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<v Speaker 1>was showing himself raw dogging on a flight. There was

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<v Speaker 1>a twenty one hour trip just prepared to laden and

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<v Speaker 1>he told GQ magazine, who did a story on it

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<v Speaker 1>that came out this week, he said he likens raw

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<v Speaker 1>dogging to meditation. He said I got sick of watching

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<v Speaker 1>the same movies. Visually, you are kind of impaired. You

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<v Speaker 1>only get to look at the seat in front of you,

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<v Speaker 1>to your right or your left. If you're at the window,

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<v Speaker 1>all you hear is that drumming sound of the engine.

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<v Speaker 1>It's just white noise. And he says, that's lovely. Jesse.

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<v Speaker 1>You recently wrote I'm a Mayor about your experience traveling

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<v Speaker 1>twenty six hours with Todd Luod. Does raw dogging sound

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<v Speaker 1>like it could have made things better?

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<v Speaker 4>This is why this story has pissed me off. I've

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<v Speaker 4>seen the headlines and I'm like, oh, you think you

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<v Speaker 4>werew a dog to fly? You roar dog to flight?

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<v Speaker 1>Did you?

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<v Speaker 4>Was it hard? Like I roar dog to flight against

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<v Speaker 4>my will? I would have loved to sit there and

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<v Speaker 4>watch a movie, or even just sit there quietly. They

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<v Speaker 4>think that they're doing some tough muttershit by not putting

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<v Speaker 4>in any stimulation. Throw in a baby throwing who there's

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<v Speaker 4>your challenge. There's your tough mutter like.

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<v Speaker 1>Not a lot of movies when you're looking after a

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<v Speaker 1>small child exactly.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm like people looking after babies have been raw dogging

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<v Speaker 4>flights forever.

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<v Speaker 1>So you did raw dogging.

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<v Speaker 4>Plus I did not relaxing hard, which sounds even worse.

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<v Speaker 2>I thought this story was nonsense, and then I remembered

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<v Speaker 2>that I actually sat next to a young man who

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<v Speaker 2>did this on my recent flight.

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<v Speaker 4>He told us about it.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, So when I went back to Manchester in April

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<v Speaker 2>for my dad's Adith on the plane back, but sat

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<v Speaker 2>down next to this young man and he was very

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<v Speaker 2>fits this demo right, like a young cool kind of

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<v Speaker 2>jen z Eddy guy. He was coming to Australia for

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<v Speaker 2>the first time ever for a job. He's got a

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<v Speaker 2>tech job and he's doing something techie, techie, he's like

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<v Speaker 2>that tech guy. And he said, I've never done a

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<v Speaker 2>long haul flight before, have you? And I was like,

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<v Speaker 2>I've never done a long half flight. I was like, friends,

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<v Speaker 2>I've been doing this flight for twenty five years now.

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<v Speaker 2>And he says, what are your tips? And I was like,

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<v Speaker 2>have a drink.

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<v Speaker 1>Watch a movie, like just wait till it's over, wait

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<v Speaker 1>till it's ever. It's just a day out of your life.

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<v Speaker 2>That's what we always say is And he said, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>going to use this as a challenge to myself to unplug.

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<v Speaker 2>And I was like, you are an idiot. This is

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<v Speaker 2>not the moment.

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<v Speaker 1>Very slowly, but he did.

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<v Speaker 4>This fits into our idea that men don't understand little

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<v Speaker 4>treat culture. It's true because women will treat it if

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<v Speaker 4>they can, if they don't have their hands full. It's

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<v Speaker 4>just a series of treats.

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<v Speaker 2>It's an amazing a rom com, exactly a bad food in.

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<v Speaker 4>A mush yes, whereas men are like, how can I

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<v Speaker 4>make this more painful?

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<v Speaker 2>It's like just watch a movie.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, come shopping with me at Witchery. I've never shopped

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<v Speaker 1>here before, but I had to check it out because

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<v Speaker 1>they did a whole new rebrand and were dropping some

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<v Speaker 1>amazing new pieces this week.

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<v Speaker 4>For better or for worse, everyone is talking about Australian

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<v Speaker 4>fashion brand Witchery. Witchery has been around since the nineteen seventies,

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<v Speaker 4>but at the end of last month they virtually wiped

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<v Speaker 4>their Instagram account. They deleted it everything, and they then

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<v Speaker 4>posted something that read coming soon a fresh design direction

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<v Speaker 4>and new look for Witchery. On the second of July,

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<v Speaker 4>they launched their brand new collection. It's called Bold Awakening

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<v Speaker 4>and it is led by their new head of design

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<v Speaker 4>named Kirby Hanrahan and the target is women who want

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<v Speaker 4>to feel forever thirty and Hanrahan explained that everything has

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<v Speaker 4>been designed to mix and match together to make a

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<v Speaker 4>capsule wardrobe. This is a direction we've seen a lot

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<v Speaker 4>of fashion brands go down, So Dish is an example

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<v Speaker 4>seed assembly label. We're seeing less patterns and sequins sorry

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<v Speaker 4>maya less sort of leopard print and more classic shapes.

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<v Speaker 4>And the idea behind this is that it's smart merchandising

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<v Speaker 4>because it addresses cost of living. It takes a lot

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<v Speaker 4>more to have a woman spend her hard earned cash

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<v Speaker 4>and she doesn't want something that's going to be out

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<v Speaker 4>of fashion or look dated in two months. But with

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<v Speaker 4>the new range a swift wave of criticism. Some customers

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<v Speaker 4>noticed that sizing went from four to eighteen, meaning that

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<v Speaker 4>Witchery had removed a size twenty and customers commented on

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<v Speaker 4>the new range, saying, it's not a bold awakening. If

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<v Speaker 4>you cannot do the bare minimum for size inclusivity, read

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<v Speaker 4>the room, Witchery. It's twenty twenty four. You should be

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<v Speaker 4>expanding sizing, not reducing it. Witchery swiftly released a statement

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<v Speaker 4>that said if you're a twenty in the previous range,

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<v Speaker 4>we invite you to try a size eighteen because this

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<v Speaker 4>range is a more relaxed fit, and they added the

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<v Speaker 4>size twenty that they previously had accounted for a small

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<v Speaker 4>percentage of our sales, so there was also a business

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<v Speaker 4>reason for it. We asked some women what they thought

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<v Speaker 4>of the Witchery rebrand. Here's what they said.

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<v Speaker 5>Yes, in terms of the rebrand, I think the actual

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<v Speaker 5>PR launch was really cool, but I think a fell flat.

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<v Speaker 5>I actually don't think it's very different than what they've

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<v Speaker 5>done before.

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<v Speaker 1>It still feels like old Witchery.

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<v Speaker 5>I think they've completely alien needed like a big cohort

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<v Speaker 5>of their customers, and also when they're trying to connect

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<v Speaker 5>with the younger generation who cares about inclusivity, I think

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<v Speaker 5>they've polarized a lot of people.

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<v Speaker 3>Through doing that.

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<v Speaker 1>I just think, in this day and age, to be

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<v Speaker 1>cutting out a size twenty and then.

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<v Speaker 6>Expect people to try the eighteen instead, it's pretty wild.

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<v Speaker 7>I don't mind the direction they're going in. I think

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<v Speaker 7>it's quite fresh and new in terms of the different

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<v Speaker 7>sizing and removing the size twenty. I did hear through

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<v Speaker 7>the grapevine that they might actually be bringing it back,

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<v Speaker 7>but the reason that they took it off the market

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<v Speaker 7>was because it wasn't accurate enough. So I think it's

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<v Speaker 7>once they understand a more accurate size twenty, they are

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<v Speaker 7>probably going to bring that back into stores.

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<v Speaker 6>So the Witry rebrand looks exactly the same. I can't

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<v Speaker 6>believe there spend time and energy trying to put out

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<v Speaker 6>a new range or a new style and they made

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<v Speaker 6>it so similar to what they were already doing ofense

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<v Speaker 6>to them. The thing that's upset me the most, though,

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<v Speaker 6>is the fact that they're bragging about using vanity sizing.

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<v Speaker 6>Why is there more value in a smaller number on

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<v Speaker 6>my shirt than a bigger number. My size is my size,

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<v Speaker 6>I'm cool with it. Why are you witchery telling me

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<v Speaker 6>that I should be happier in a smaller size than

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<v Speaker 6>the number I actually am.

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<v Speaker 4>Maya, what is vanity sizing? So?

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<v Speaker 1>Vanity sizing is based on this idea that women put

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<v Speaker 1>a lot of self esteem based on the size on

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<v Speaker 1>their clothes, and that the smaller the size, the better

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<v Speaker 1>a woman feels. So even though some people wonder why

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<v Speaker 1>they might be a size ten in one label and

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<v Speaker 1>a size fourteen in another and a size six in another,

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<v Speaker 1>there's no such thing as standardized sizing. Every label size

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<v Speaker 1>is depending on their customer base. So say you have

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<v Speaker 1>four or five sizes, except for Brandy Melville, which only

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<v Speaker 1>has one five. If your customers tend to be a

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<v Speaker 1>certain age or they like a certain style of clothes,

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<v Speaker 1>they might be a different body shape to the brand

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<v Speaker 1>of another company that might target older women who might

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<v Speaker 1>be larger, or you know, they might have different body shapes.

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<v Speaker 1>So what I think we've got to remember, and I'd

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<v Speaker 1>completely understand why people feel really upset about this. Fashion

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<v Speaker 1>brands are businesses. They're not community services, and so they

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<v Speaker 1>are going to do what's good for business. And I

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<v Speaker 1>agree with that person who said, why did they capitulate

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<v Speaker 1>this idea of vanity sizing and that women will feel

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<v Speaker 1>better and more predisposed to the Witchery brand if they're

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<v Speaker 1>a size eighteen when they used to be a size twenty.

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<v Speaker 1>That's a big problem for Witchery to fix in terms

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<v Speaker 1>of generations of beauty standards and oppression that we've inhaled.

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<v Speaker 4>As that vanity sizing still stands because my experience, and

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<v Speaker 4>I'm not plus sized, but my experience is that I

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<v Speaker 4>will walk into a shop, I will look at the label.

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<v Speaker 4>I hate trying things on, and I think that in

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<v Speaker 4>spects to a lot of women's experience if they don't

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<v Speaker 4>have the number that I see as the one that

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<v Speaker 4>fits me, I'm not trying on a size smaller.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm just And also, if you're buying online, which most

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<v Speaker 2>people are these days, most people, but lots of people are.

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<v Speaker 2>I live regionally, all the shopping is online, right then

0:11:23.967 --> 0:11:26.607
<v Speaker 2>I have to go by sizes. I'm not trying things on,

0:11:26.927 --> 0:11:28.527
<v Speaker 2>So they have to mean something.

0:11:28.687 --> 0:11:30.447
<v Speaker 1>People used to know though they used to be a

0:11:30.487 --> 0:11:33.007
<v Speaker 1>joke about. I'm a country Road size eight, which means

0:11:33.007 --> 0:11:34.767
<v Speaker 1>women who were not a size eight in any other

0:11:34.847 --> 0:11:38.047
<v Speaker 1>label were a country Road size eight who interestingly also

0:11:38.087 --> 0:11:42.607
<v Speaker 1>owned Wittery. Country Road has always had generous sizing, whereas,

0:11:42.687 --> 0:11:46.967
<v Speaker 1>for example, a size eight in Soupre or sports Girl

0:11:47.407 --> 0:11:51.407
<v Speaker 1>might be a lot smaller because their target market is

0:11:51.447 --> 0:11:52.167
<v Speaker 1>a lot smaller.

0:11:52.327 --> 0:11:55.687
<v Speaker 2>Quite literally, that's what they're saying, though, isn't it right?

0:11:56.007 --> 0:11:59.207
<v Speaker 2>How does this not become a self fulfilling prophecy? Do

0:11:59.207 --> 0:11:59.927
<v Speaker 2>you know what I mean?

0:12:00.407 --> 0:12:00.647
<v Speaker 1>You mean?

0:12:00.807 --> 0:12:05.247
<v Speaker 2>So, the average Australian woman is a size fourteen to sixteen,

0:12:06.327 --> 0:12:08.767
<v Speaker 2>and the sizing at Whicher is rebrand goes from a

0:12:08.767 --> 0:12:11.807
<v Speaker 2>size five or to a size eighteen. We understand what

0:12:11.847 --> 0:12:15.247
<v Speaker 2>average means, right, So why are there five sizes under

0:12:15.247 --> 0:12:16.647
<v Speaker 2>the average and only one above it?

0:12:16.847 --> 0:12:18.327
<v Speaker 1>Well that's alarming too, isn't it.

0:12:18.367 --> 0:12:20.967
<v Speaker 2>So that is alarming because the thing is is it's

0:12:20.967 --> 0:12:23.487
<v Speaker 2>a self fulfilling prophecy because you are marketing who I

0:12:23.527 --> 0:12:26.847
<v Speaker 2>want to wear my clothes. It doesn't matter whether the

0:12:26.887 --> 0:12:29.207
<v Speaker 2>eighteen is an eighteen or a twenty or a sixteen

0:12:29.287 --> 0:12:33.127
<v Speaker 2>or whatever. By taking the twenty off the label, you

0:12:33.207 --> 0:12:36.927
<v Speaker 2>are signaling to a portion of the population you're not

0:12:37.007 --> 0:12:39.647
<v Speaker 2>welcome in this shop. We don't make clothes for you.

0:12:40.127 --> 0:12:43.047
<v Speaker 2>It doesn't really matter whether the clothes fit, it's what

0:12:43.087 --> 0:12:46.927
<v Speaker 2>it says. Because they're saying five sizes underneath the average,

0:12:46.967 --> 0:12:49.287
<v Speaker 2>we want you, can you come in? Please? Can you

0:12:49.287 --> 0:12:50.407
<v Speaker 2>come in and wear our clothes?

0:12:50.447 --> 0:12:51.407
<v Speaker 1>And that's the right.

0:12:51.487 --> 0:12:54.127
<v Speaker 2>People are really upset because they feel like a brand

0:12:54.127 --> 0:12:56.367
<v Speaker 2>that they liked and trusted and thought was a mainstream

0:12:56.407 --> 0:13:00.647
<v Speaker 2>brand that made relatively accessible clothes was for them and

0:13:00.687 --> 0:13:03.727
<v Speaker 2>they've just been told that they're not. And that's not great.

0:13:03.807 --> 0:13:05.967
<v Speaker 1>So brands do this in lots of different ways. They

0:13:06.167 --> 0:13:08.727
<v Speaker 1>tell you who their target market is they do it

0:13:08.727 --> 0:13:10.927
<v Speaker 1>with the music they play in stores, they do it

0:13:10.967 --> 0:13:13.367
<v Speaker 1>with the people that they hire to work in their stores,

0:13:13.607 --> 0:13:16.447
<v Speaker 1>they do it with of course they're advertising their social media,

0:13:16.967 --> 0:13:19.847
<v Speaker 1>and they do it with their sizing. So I think

0:13:19.927 --> 0:13:22.727
<v Speaker 1>that what Witcher is clearly from a business point of view,

0:13:22.887 --> 0:13:26.567
<v Speaker 1>taking all emotions out of it. What has been clear

0:13:26.607 --> 0:13:28.887
<v Speaker 1>to them It seems like their audience was aging out

0:13:29.367 --> 0:13:32.407
<v Speaker 1>and perhaps those people who were older were not buying

0:13:32.487 --> 0:13:35.847
<v Speaker 1>enough clothes, and so they need to go for a

0:13:35.887 --> 0:13:39.847
<v Speaker 1>younger demographic, and they are trying to reposition themselves as

0:13:39.927 --> 0:13:44.487
<v Speaker 1>younger and cooler, and by definition that will be exclusionary.

0:13:44.567 --> 0:13:46.927
<v Speaker 2>But younger and cooler people care about inclusivity in a

0:13:46.967 --> 0:13:48.287
<v Speaker 2>way the older clients don't.

0:13:48.527 --> 0:13:51.927
<v Speaker 1>You're right about that, because younger people care about inclusivity,

0:13:51.967 --> 0:13:54.767
<v Speaker 1>even if they themselves will not buy that. So the

0:13:54.847 --> 0:13:56.687
<v Speaker 1>question is from a business point of view, and I

0:13:56.727 --> 0:13:58.767
<v Speaker 1>know a lot of small businesses struggle with this as well,

0:13:58.767 --> 0:14:02.047
<v Speaker 1>this expectation that every business needs to have a really

0:14:02.207 --> 0:14:06.887
<v Speaker 1>wide inclusive size range. That's not always possible to manufacture

0:14:07.327 --> 0:14:11.727
<v Speaker 1>because the more sizes you manufacture, the more expensive it

0:14:11.807 --> 0:14:13.047
<v Speaker 1>is to produce those clothes.

0:14:13.327 --> 0:14:16.007
<v Speaker 4>I understand that, but I also see what Holly's saying

0:14:16.007 --> 0:14:19.247
<v Speaker 4>about self fulfilling. If I know that if I go

0:14:19.287 --> 0:14:21.767
<v Speaker 4>to Westfield, I am not going to find in any

0:14:21.807 --> 0:14:24.047
<v Speaker 4>shop something that fits me, I'm not going to go

0:14:24.047 --> 0:14:26.967
<v Speaker 4>to Westfield, so I'm opting out. So it's this weird

0:14:27.047 --> 0:14:29.487
<v Speaker 4>chicken and egg, right. It's like if everyone were to

0:14:29.687 --> 0:14:33.247
<v Speaker 4>start offering those sizes, and you can't just start offering them,

0:14:33.367 --> 0:14:36.127
<v Speaker 4>You've got to market them. You've got to tell people

0:14:36.167 --> 0:14:38.407
<v Speaker 4>you've got them. So there are some places that do

0:14:38.487 --> 0:14:41.367
<v Speaker 4>have a wide size range, but people have in their heads, oh,

0:14:41.367 --> 0:14:42.887
<v Speaker 4>that would never fit me, that would never fit me.

0:14:42.927 --> 0:14:45.487
<v Speaker 1>And we've all been in that position. If I remember,

0:14:45.527 --> 0:14:48.527
<v Speaker 1>there was a brand called Patinalaliano, which interestingly enough doesn't

0:14:48.567 --> 0:14:51.247
<v Speaker 1>exist anymore, but in the nineties it used to be

0:14:51.327 --> 0:14:53.527
<v Speaker 1>famous that you would go in there and the very

0:14:53.567 --> 0:14:56.287
<v Speaker 1>skinny sales girls would say, if you're a bigger than

0:14:56.287 --> 0:14:58.567
<v Speaker 1>a size ten, oh, we don't have anything for you here.

0:14:59.007 --> 0:15:01.047
<v Speaker 1>And I don't even think they went past a size ten.

0:15:01.247 --> 0:15:04.367
<v Speaker 1>And that was very clearly they were trying to say,

0:15:04.447 --> 0:15:06.887
<v Speaker 1>we only want a certain type of people wearing our clothes.

0:15:06.887 --> 0:15:09.807
<v Speaker 1>And again I'm not defending this, I'm just explaining it

0:15:09.927 --> 0:15:12.527
<v Speaker 1>because Brandy Melville is another example of that. There's only

0:15:12.567 --> 0:15:13.127
<v Speaker 1>one side.

0:15:13.167 --> 0:15:15.567
<v Speaker 2>But here's the thing that I don't understand about if

0:15:15.607 --> 0:15:18.847
<v Speaker 2>this is just smart business, I don't see how it's

0:15:18.887 --> 0:15:21.447
<v Speaker 2>possibly just smart business because they're still making the same

0:15:21.487 --> 0:15:24.087
<v Speaker 2>size clothes if you believe their story, they're eighteen is

0:15:24.087 --> 0:15:25.847
<v Speaker 2>a twenty. They've just changed the numbers, so they're not

0:15:25.887 --> 0:15:28.607
<v Speaker 2>saving any money, they're not making any efficiencies. They're just

0:15:28.687 --> 0:15:31.607
<v Speaker 2>making a very clear marketing call that we don't want

0:15:31.607 --> 0:15:32.887
<v Speaker 2>bigger women in our shops.

0:15:32.967 --> 0:15:35.047
<v Speaker 1>No, but they're not because but the women who are

0:15:35.047 --> 0:15:39.007
<v Speaker 1>size twenty, they're saying, still come, still buy. But guess what,

0:15:39.087 --> 0:15:40.887
<v Speaker 1>you've just gone down to size Ah.

0:15:41.127 --> 0:15:44.447
<v Speaker 2>But going to this idea that they're appealing to a younger,

0:15:44.487 --> 0:15:48.127
<v Speaker 2>cooler demo, the younger, cooler demo is unpicking this idea

0:15:48.167 --> 0:15:51.527
<v Speaker 2>of vanity sizing. I'm talking to my like, my teenager

0:15:51.567 --> 0:15:53.527
<v Speaker 2>is buying clothes and she's buying online as I say,

0:15:53.567 --> 0:15:57.487
<v Speaker 2>we live recently. Also, it's crazy because they're competing these

0:15:57.487 --> 0:16:00.087
<v Speaker 2>brands with Timu and Sheen and all these places where

0:16:00.087 --> 0:16:02.727
<v Speaker 2>the clothes are so much cheaper and come in a

0:16:02.847 --> 0:16:06.007
<v Speaker 2>much wider range of sizing. So it is really silly,

0:16:06.047 --> 0:16:09.927
<v Speaker 2>this elitist approach. But also it's this idea that young people.

0:16:09.927 --> 0:16:11.527
<v Speaker 1>I just hang on a second, Hey, let's unpack that

0:16:11.567 --> 0:16:14.727
<v Speaker 1>for a second, because what are we asking here. If

0:16:14.767 --> 0:16:18.327
<v Speaker 1>you want to mass produce, yes, you can afford, because

0:16:18.327 --> 0:16:20.567
<v Speaker 1>you're going to reach millions and millions of people. It's

0:16:20.567 --> 0:16:24.407
<v Speaker 1>going to be incredibly cheap. What things are happening in

0:16:24.447 --> 0:16:28.087
<v Speaker 1>that production line to create that jacket that costs eight

0:16:28.087 --> 0:16:31.847
<v Speaker 1>dollars from Timu. They might have all sorts of sizes,

0:16:32.007 --> 0:16:34.527
<v Speaker 1>but we know that so these are business decisions.

0:16:34.687 --> 0:16:37.247
<v Speaker 2>As I've just said, they haven't changed their business model.

0:16:37.287 --> 0:16:39.807
<v Speaker 2>They say they're eighteen is a twenty. It's a marketing decision,

0:16:39.807 --> 0:16:42.087
<v Speaker 2>and I get that that's a business decision. But my

0:16:42.207 --> 0:16:45.367
<v Speaker 2>question is if we're working hard to unpick. As one

0:16:45.407 --> 0:16:48.247
<v Speaker 2>of our Voxpop people said there, that a smaller number

0:16:48.287 --> 0:16:50.287
<v Speaker 2>is a better number always, and I think that we

0:16:50.407 --> 0:16:53.887
<v Speaker 2>really have been making headway there, particularly with younger people.

0:16:54.167 --> 0:16:56.327
<v Speaker 2>So when I talk to my daughter and I'm like, well,

0:16:56.367 --> 0:16:58.647
<v Speaker 2>you might buy this size, you might buy this size,

0:16:58.767 --> 0:17:00.927
<v Speaker 2>It's got nothing to do with your body. It's to

0:17:00.927 --> 0:17:03.527
<v Speaker 2>do with the way the clothes are made. I'm trying

0:17:03.607 --> 0:17:05.887
<v Speaker 2>really hard not to give her a message that a

0:17:05.967 --> 0:17:07.967
<v Speaker 2>ten is better than a twelve is better than a fourteen,

0:17:08.287 --> 0:17:10.127
<v Speaker 2>and so it just seems regressive.

0:17:10.527 --> 0:17:12.967
<v Speaker 1>Clothing labels have to have sizes, right. And it's interesting

0:17:13.007 --> 0:17:14.727
<v Speaker 1>what you say, Jesse about if you go in and

0:17:14.767 --> 0:17:16.967
<v Speaker 1>you don't see anything in your size, the number you've

0:17:16.967 --> 0:17:19.047
<v Speaker 1>got in my head. I don't have a number in

0:17:19.047 --> 0:17:21.687
<v Speaker 1>my head because in my wardrobe I've got everything from

0:17:21.687 --> 0:17:24.527
<v Speaker 1>a size six to a size fourteen, depending on how

0:17:24.567 --> 0:17:27.647
<v Speaker 1>I like it to fit, depending on what label it is,

0:17:27.927 --> 0:17:28.767
<v Speaker 1>depending on when I go.

0:17:28.887 --> 0:17:31.127
<v Speaker 4>I think there are different types of consumers, right. And

0:17:31.167 --> 0:17:34.567
<v Speaker 4>the other thing that's happening here is I wonder, in

0:17:34.647 --> 0:17:37.887
<v Speaker 4>terms of the economics of the whole thing, people who

0:17:37.927 --> 0:17:41.047
<v Speaker 4>are straight sized probably buy more clothes. Why do they

0:17:41.087 --> 0:17:43.367
<v Speaker 4>buy more clothes because there are more clothes available?

0:17:43.407 --> 0:17:43.727
<v Speaker 1>Correct?

0:17:43.927 --> 0:17:47.807
<v Speaker 4>Yes, So it's like it's self fulfilling because if I'm

0:17:47.847 --> 0:17:50.367
<v Speaker 4>a size twenty, then it's like I don't feel like

0:17:50.367 --> 0:17:52.727
<v Speaker 4>I have lots of options. The world has told me

0:17:52.887 --> 0:17:55.447
<v Speaker 4>that there are only certain styles that suit me.

0:17:55.647 --> 0:17:57.047
<v Speaker 1>I'm going to push back on that. I think there

0:17:57.047 --> 0:17:59.967
<v Speaker 1>are more options now than there ever have been before,

0:18:00.527 --> 0:18:02.407
<v Speaker 1>with just a diversity of sizes.

0:18:02.447 --> 0:18:05.607
<v Speaker 2>But we've just established that the average Australian woman is

0:18:05.607 --> 0:18:09.607
<v Speaker 2>a fourteen to sixty, So that means that the average

0:18:09.647 --> 0:18:11.327
<v Speaker 2>is the middle. Think of the amount of people who

0:18:11.407 --> 0:18:13.007
<v Speaker 2>are above that not being so.

0:18:13.127 --> 0:18:15.527
<v Speaker 1>I think what's interesting here, as you said, Wholly and

0:18:15.567 --> 0:18:17.807
<v Speaker 1>again I'm not divining Witchery, is the fact that it

0:18:17.967 --> 0:18:20.047
<v Speaker 1>used to be the smaller size, the fact that we

0:18:20.127 --> 0:18:21.567
<v Speaker 1>are now going down to a four.

0:18:22.447 --> 0:18:26.287
<v Speaker 4>What is that saying, Well, it's probably saying something about

0:18:26.487 --> 0:18:29.287
<v Speaker 4>the teen segment or kind of the you know, fifteen,

0:18:29.327 --> 0:18:31.967
<v Speaker 4>sixteen seventeen. You used to go and almost shop as

0:18:32.007 --> 0:18:34.167
<v Speaker 4>a child, or we had I remember I did soup

0:18:34.167 --> 0:18:36.207
<v Speaker 4>pre right. It was like I never shopped in the

0:18:36.207 --> 0:18:39.847
<v Speaker 4>same shop as my mother. But now we kind of are.

0:18:40.367 --> 0:18:42.087
<v Speaker 4>But on the size fourteen to sixteen.

0:18:42.167 --> 0:18:42.727
<v Speaker 2>I looked it up.

0:18:42.767 --> 0:18:45.727
<v Speaker 4>I looked at Witchery's competitors. I couldn't find one of

0:18:45.767 --> 0:18:50.167
<v Speaker 4>Witchery's competitors that went above a sixteen. So Witchery is

0:18:50.207 --> 0:18:54.167
<v Speaker 4>already doing like one more, which isn't you know, to

0:18:54.167 --> 0:18:57.287
<v Speaker 4>give them too much credit. But if the average is

0:18:57.287 --> 0:19:01.527
<v Speaker 4>fourteen to sixteen, and that is an extra on, some extra, extra,

0:19:01.607 --> 0:19:04.287
<v Speaker 4>extra large, well that is why.

0:19:04.087 --> 0:19:06.167
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's why this has become such in a motive

0:19:06.287 --> 0:19:09.047
<v Speaker 2>conversation this week, right, because a lot of people are

0:19:09.047 --> 0:19:11.447
<v Speaker 2>really mad about it. A lot of people are very upset.

0:19:11.567 --> 0:19:13.927
<v Speaker 2>And that's the reason why, because as you just said,

0:19:14.407 --> 0:19:16.447
<v Speaker 2>there are enormous amount of Australian women who are just

0:19:16.527 --> 0:19:19.527
<v Speaker 2>cut out of being able to enjoy fashion and able

0:19:19.567 --> 0:19:22.087
<v Speaker 2>to enjoy clothes. I have one more question on this though,

0:19:22.127 --> 0:19:25.087
<v Speaker 2>from my business expert friend, Meir Friedman. There's a little

0:19:25.127 --> 0:19:28.047
<v Speaker 2>cynical bit of me that thinks this was a deliberate

0:19:28.207 --> 0:19:32.607
<v Speaker 2>fuss because, as you said, Jesse, they wiped their instir.

0:19:32.727 --> 0:19:35.287
<v Speaker 2>They've come back all big. They needed a big splash.

0:19:35.447 --> 0:19:38.127
<v Speaker 2>They apparently haven't changed anything except the numbers.

0:19:39.167 --> 0:19:41.247
<v Speaker 1>No, that's not true. They've really changed the range.

0:19:41.287 --> 0:19:43.487
<v Speaker 2>No no, no, sorry, I mean in terms of the sizing,

0:19:43.567 --> 0:19:45.807
<v Speaker 2>and they haven't changed anything except the numbers. No, no, I

0:19:45.847 --> 0:19:47.327
<v Speaker 2>know the clothes are different, But what I mean is

0:19:48.007 --> 0:19:50.967
<v Speaker 2>they haven't actually cut size twenty. They've just rebranded it.

0:19:51.007 --> 0:19:53.807
<v Speaker 2>That's what they're telling us. So the decision to do

0:19:53.887 --> 0:19:58.727
<v Speaker 2>it was it just a publicity play because everybody's been

0:19:58.727 --> 0:20:02.527
<v Speaker 2>talking about Witchery for five days now, negatively positively. Oh

0:20:02.727 --> 0:20:05.007
<v Speaker 2>maybe I'll go and have a look. I went online

0:20:05.167 --> 0:20:08.087
<v Speaker 2>looked at this new range. Was very representative of the

0:20:08.087 --> 0:20:11.127
<v Speaker 2>clothes I see the young people around the office. It

0:20:11.207 --> 0:20:14.327
<v Speaker 2>was very expensive. There was a really beautiful blue shirt

0:20:14.327 --> 0:20:16.287
<v Speaker 2>and I'm like, oh, I might buy that, and then

0:20:16.287 --> 0:20:17.527
<v Speaker 2>I was like, oh, I don't know if I should

0:20:18.687 --> 0:20:21.847
<v Speaker 2>because maybe it's bad. But so was this just smart

0:20:21.887 --> 0:20:24.567
<v Speaker 2>marketing to cause a storm for Witchery.

0:20:24.327 --> 0:20:25.607
<v Speaker 4>And did it work well?

0:20:25.647 --> 0:20:27.727
<v Speaker 1>It has worked, because sales are up forty one percent,

0:20:27.767 --> 0:20:30.447
<v Speaker 1>But I don't think anyone would say that you would

0:20:30.487 --> 0:20:34.207
<v Speaker 1>deliberately try to have a backlash against and criticism of

0:20:34.487 --> 0:20:38.207
<v Speaker 1>a new launch. I really feel for the young designer Kirby,

0:20:38.247 --> 0:20:41.367
<v Speaker 1>who's been brought in clearly with an objective, here's what

0:20:41.407 --> 0:20:44.567
<v Speaker 1>we want you to do for the business. She's done

0:20:44.647 --> 0:20:47.767
<v Speaker 1>that clearly, and she's personally copped a lot of backlash

0:20:47.767 --> 0:20:50.047
<v Speaker 1>because we've sort of lays it in on the size thing.

0:20:50.087 --> 0:20:53.287
<v Speaker 1>But there's also a bubbleskirt that people were really angry

0:20:53.287 --> 0:20:56.247
<v Speaker 1>about because it's like, oh, I always depended on Witchery

0:20:56.327 --> 0:21:00.207
<v Speaker 1>for corporate wear and sort of grown up clothes, and

0:21:00.247 --> 0:21:03.087
<v Speaker 1>Witchery models were a little bit older, and now it

0:21:03.127 --> 0:21:05.447
<v Speaker 1>does look cooler in their marketing, in the clothes that

0:21:05.487 --> 0:21:07.887
<v Speaker 1>they've done. It's also more expensive, as you say. And

0:21:07.927 --> 0:21:10.447
<v Speaker 1>I think what's been interesting to me is to see

0:21:10.967 --> 0:21:12.887
<v Speaker 1>it's been a good thing for Witchery in some ways,

0:21:12.927 --> 0:21:15.807
<v Speaker 1>because you've got a whole cohort of women who've said,

0:21:15.807 --> 0:21:19.047
<v Speaker 1>I feel really betrayed. This is not what I thought

0:21:19.087 --> 0:21:22.487
<v Speaker 1>Witchery was, and I feel that Witchery doesn't want me anymore,

0:21:22.527 --> 0:21:24.847
<v Speaker 1>and I feel betrayed, and I feel rejected because what

0:21:24.887 --> 0:21:27.367
<v Speaker 1>I thought Witchery was, Witchery is telling me it no

0:21:27.447 --> 0:21:30.967
<v Speaker 1>longer wants to be. And so that speaks a lot

0:21:31.007 --> 0:21:34.727
<v Speaker 1>to Witchery's position in the psyche for Australian women. But also,

0:21:35.007 --> 0:21:38.047
<v Speaker 1>you don't do a refresh like that unless you have

0:21:38.087 --> 0:21:40.847
<v Speaker 1>a problem, unless you are losing audience share, unless sales

0:21:40.847 --> 0:21:44.287
<v Speaker 1>are down, unless you need to change and get a

0:21:44.327 --> 0:21:48.247
<v Speaker 1>different and a bigger and a higher spending customer base.

0:21:48.327 --> 0:21:49.927
<v Speaker 1>Because a lot of the people that are saying I'm

0:21:49.927 --> 0:21:52.447
<v Speaker 1>really angry at Witchery, I'd be interested to know how

0:21:52.487 --> 0:21:54.927
<v Speaker 1>long since they've shot there, because I went through a

0:21:54.927 --> 0:21:57.527
<v Speaker 1>phase where I bought so much Witchery. I loved it.

0:21:57.927 --> 0:22:00.327
<v Speaker 1>But I've found myself really going off it over the

0:22:00.407 --> 0:22:02.287
<v Speaker 1>last few years because I kind of haven't known what

0:22:02.407 --> 0:22:05.727
<v Speaker 1>it is, Like it isn't country Road, but it isn't

0:22:06.047 --> 0:22:08.447
<v Speaker 1>Q but it isn't. Yeah, it's like I know what

0:22:08.487 --> 0:22:11.887
<v Speaker 1>cotton On is, I know what Zara is, I know

0:22:11.927 --> 0:22:14.687
<v Speaker 1>what country Road is, but I don't really know what

0:22:14.687 --> 0:22:17.047
<v Speaker 1>Witchery is anymore. And I used to. I even know

0:22:17.087 --> 0:22:18.887
<v Speaker 1>what Seed is, but I would argue that Seed is

0:22:18.927 --> 0:22:21.167
<v Speaker 1>another brand that's gone a little bit that way. So

0:22:21.207 --> 0:22:23.447
<v Speaker 1>they're sort of in that middle that's a bit of

0:22:23.447 --> 0:22:26.087
<v Speaker 1>a no man's land where they're not particularly cheap, they're

0:22:26.127 --> 0:22:28.807
<v Speaker 1>not particularly cool, they're not particularly fancy. Are they for

0:22:28.887 --> 0:22:30.687
<v Speaker 1>old people? They're not for young people, but they're not

0:22:30.687 --> 0:22:32.567
<v Speaker 1>really for old people. They're just a bit nothing. They

0:22:32.607 --> 0:22:36.207
<v Speaker 1>didn't they lost their brand personality, so they have followed

0:22:36.367 --> 0:22:38.767
<v Speaker 1>the path of dish. Dish has been around for decades,

0:22:38.807 --> 0:22:40.327
<v Speaker 1>but people have only started talking about it in the

0:22:40.367 --> 0:22:40.727
<v Speaker 1>last year.

0:22:40.727 --> 0:22:43.007
<v Speaker 4>I wrought it about twenty twenty when they launched the

0:22:43.007 --> 0:22:43.807
<v Speaker 4>Capsual wardrobe.

0:22:43.967 --> 0:22:46.167
<v Speaker 2>So you don't think they deliberately provoked to.

0:22:46.207 --> 0:22:51.247
<v Speaker 1>Find No, no, no, no, no no. It's never the conspiracy,

0:22:51.287 --> 0:22:53.487
<v Speaker 1>it's always the fuck up. So I think they were

0:22:53.607 --> 0:22:57.447
<v Speaker 1>naive in not perhaps seeing this coming. The other mistake

0:22:57.487 --> 0:23:01.367
<v Speaker 1>they made is in that first tranch of social media

0:23:01.407 --> 0:23:04.847
<v Speaker 1>content that they created, there were only straight sized, very

0:23:04.847 --> 0:23:07.727
<v Speaker 1>young women. And I think that's interesting what you found out, Jesse,

0:23:07.807 --> 0:23:10.487
<v Speaker 1>about the objective of the new range and the new

0:23:10.567 --> 0:23:13.527
<v Speaker 1>look for Witchery is forever thirty. So that was just

0:23:13.607 --> 0:23:16.767
<v Speaker 1>to me. But with my fashion, do I want to

0:23:16.767 --> 0:23:18.847
<v Speaker 1>look around thirty? I don't work with my face, but

0:23:18.927 --> 0:23:21.847
<v Speaker 1>with my fashion, yeah, maybe I don't want to look

0:23:21.847 --> 0:23:23.367
<v Speaker 1>fifty because the idea to.

0:23:23.247 --> 0:23:25.207
<v Speaker 2>Me, if don't I want to look twenty, well no,

0:23:25.247 --> 0:23:27.087
<v Speaker 2>I definitely don't want to look I don't know. I

0:23:27.127 --> 0:23:28.967
<v Speaker 2>don't want to look twenty. But if I'm twenty four,

0:23:29.007 --> 0:23:30.767
<v Speaker 2>don't I want to look twenty or thirty?

0:23:30.807 --> 0:23:33.647
<v Speaker 1>So that's what's interesting. So people always want to age

0:23:33.687 --> 0:23:36.687
<v Speaker 1>down or up. So for example, when I used to

0:23:36.687 --> 0:23:38.967
<v Speaker 1>do Cosmo, we used to pitch even though our average

0:23:39.007 --> 0:23:41.567
<v Speaker 1>reader was eighteen to twenty four. That was our sweet spot,

0:23:41.727 --> 0:23:44.327
<v Speaker 1>but we pitched at a twenty seven year old. And

0:23:44.407 --> 0:23:47.727
<v Speaker 1>so with fashion, you pitched down to attract an older.

0:23:47.807 --> 0:23:49.567
<v Speaker 1>So if they're pitching at thirty, I would say that

0:23:49.607 --> 0:23:51.927
<v Speaker 1>means their demographic is twenty five to forty five.

0:23:52.207 --> 0:23:54.967
<v Speaker 4>And look, I don't know much about fashion, but I

0:23:55.007 --> 0:23:57.967
<v Speaker 4>would think if the average woman is a size fourteen

0:23:58.007 --> 0:24:00.487
<v Speaker 4>to sixteen and she's looking at clothes, she wants to

0:24:00.527 --> 0:24:01.647
<v Speaker 4>know what they're gonna look like on her.

0:24:01.767 --> 0:24:02.407
<v Speaker 1>Absolutely.

0:24:02.447 --> 0:24:04.647
<v Speaker 4>And we had an article on Mama Maya buy a

0:24:04.647 --> 0:24:07.047
<v Speaker 4>Millia Morris. She is exactly that size and she went

0:24:07.047 --> 0:24:09.967
<v Speaker 4>into Witchery and tried it on and she went it

0:24:10.047 --> 0:24:11.887
<v Speaker 4>looked amazing, so good.

0:24:11.927 --> 0:24:14.247
<v Speaker 1>And she's a stylist. So I really love that story.

0:24:14.287 --> 0:24:16.207
<v Speaker 1>Instead of reading all the reaction.

0:24:15.967 --> 0:24:17.767
<v Speaker 4>To it, it's just like, he's what it actually looks

0:24:17.927 --> 0:24:18.207
<v Speaker 4>that we.

0:24:18.167 --> 0:24:19.127
<v Speaker 1>Sound like an ad for witchery.

0:24:19.127 --> 0:24:19.767
<v Speaker 3>We forget that.

0:24:19.807 --> 0:24:22.407
<v Speaker 1>But I know here to defend witchery or spook witchery.

0:24:22.767 --> 0:24:26.167
<v Speaker 2>As we've discussed today, there is an enormous section of

0:24:26.247 --> 0:24:28.807
<v Speaker 2>the female community in Australia who cannot walk into a

0:24:28.847 --> 0:24:30.327
<v Speaker 2>shop and find things that fit them.

0:24:30.567 --> 0:25:00.167
<v Speaker 3>And it hurts.

0:24:47.287 --> 0:24:48.247
<v Speaker 4>We're putting the house.

0:24:48.087 --> 0:24:52.047
<v Speaker 1>On the market. What about us. You're adults. It's time

0:24:52.087 --> 0:24:56.207
<v Speaker 1>you started acting like adults. Mom. It's taking children longer

0:24:56.247 --> 0:24:58.727
<v Speaker 1>to grow up and become adults. You may have noticed,

0:24:58.887 --> 0:25:01.327
<v Speaker 1>because most people think of parenting being something that you

0:25:01.407 --> 0:25:03.687
<v Speaker 1>do for little kids. But a piece in the Atlantic

0:25:03.727 --> 0:25:05.927
<v Speaker 1>this week has flagged that we are living in an

0:25:05.967 --> 0:25:11.127
<v Speaker 1>age of endless parenting. This hu to be called failure

0:25:11.207 --> 0:25:13.167
<v Speaker 1>to launch. There was even a movie by that name

0:25:13.207 --> 0:25:15.207
<v Speaker 1>about it, like a thirty year old who never moved

0:25:15.207 --> 0:25:18.327
<v Speaker 1>out of home, and it referred to this idea of

0:25:18.687 --> 0:25:21.007
<v Speaker 1>someone who didn't leave the nest and transition into that

0:25:21.087 --> 0:25:24.927
<v Speaker 1>next life phase where you are meant to separate from

0:25:24.927 --> 0:25:27.287
<v Speaker 1>your family of origin and perhaps go and start a

0:25:27.327 --> 0:25:30.567
<v Speaker 1>family of your own and certainly become more independent. But

0:25:30.647 --> 0:25:33.687
<v Speaker 1>it's no longer failure to launch now, it's just normal.

0:25:34.087 --> 0:25:35.007
<v Speaker 2>So forty five.

0:25:34.847 --> 0:25:38.127
<v Speaker 1>Percent of young adults aged eighteen to twenty nine reported

0:25:38.207 --> 0:25:41.007
<v Speaker 1>living with their parents in a new Pew survey, making

0:25:41.047 --> 0:25:43.407
<v Speaker 1>it the most common living arrangement for that age group

0:25:43.647 --> 0:25:46.687
<v Speaker 1>for the first time since just after the Great Depression.

0:25:47.767 --> 0:25:51.847
<v Speaker 1>Some people are freaked out by that number. I imagine Holly

0:25:51.847 --> 0:25:54.127
<v Speaker 1>would be one of them, and they say that it

0:25:54.287 --> 0:25:58.807
<v Speaker 1>is evidence of a mushrooming over dependence among a generation

0:25:58.967 --> 0:26:04.607
<v Speaker 1>of hapless grown babies and of caregivers parents who can't,

0:26:04.647 --> 0:26:09.127
<v Speaker 1>for God's sake stop giving care. Well, the helicopter generation, right, Yeah, but.

0:26:09.327 --> 0:26:11.327
<v Speaker 2>It's also impossible to look at that stat and I

0:26:11.367 --> 0:26:13.967
<v Speaker 2>also consider how expensive it is to move out of home. Right,

0:26:14.047 --> 0:26:18.207
<v Speaker 2>So that's true. There are a number of factors coinciding

0:26:18.607 --> 0:26:19.807
<v Speaker 2>to make that the reality.

0:26:19.887 --> 0:26:21.927
<v Speaker 1>Yes, But in terms of whether we should have an

0:26:21.927 --> 0:26:25.167
<v Speaker 1>existential panic about the fact that more people are in

0:26:25.527 --> 0:26:29.967
<v Speaker 1>more regular contact with their grown children than used to

0:26:29.967 --> 0:26:33.447
<v Speaker 1>be the case, there's another angle in this story in

0:26:33.447 --> 0:26:35.887
<v Speaker 1>The Atlantic that was written by Faith Hill, not the singer.

0:26:36.367 --> 0:26:39.887
<v Speaker 1>She said, today's average parent child bond does seem to

0:26:39.927 --> 0:26:43.607
<v Speaker 1>involve near constant communication. Yet it also comes with an

0:26:43.607 --> 0:26:48.087
<v Speaker 1>intensified emotional closeness of the kind once reserved for friends

0:26:48.087 --> 0:26:50.887
<v Speaker 1>and romantic partners. So it's almost like the takeaway of

0:26:50.927 --> 0:26:54.007
<v Speaker 1>this are our parents the new friends.

0:26:55.007 --> 0:26:58.567
<v Speaker 4>So this was very evident in a film that you

0:26:58.727 --> 0:27:02.367
<v Speaker 4>both made me watch last night, which I'm really pissed

0:27:02.367 --> 0:27:02.727
<v Speaker 4>off about.

0:27:02.807 --> 0:27:04.327
<v Speaker 2>We're going to make you talk about it too in

0:27:04.327 --> 0:27:05.527
<v Speaker 2>a minute tomorrow.

0:27:05.567 --> 0:27:07.847
<v Speaker 4>We're doing a subscriber episode on it, A Family Affair

0:27:08.047 --> 0:27:10.927
<v Speaker 4>for any out louder who watched it. I know lots

0:27:10.927 --> 0:27:12.927
<v Speaker 4>of people have been posting in the Facebook grip about it.

0:27:13.567 --> 0:27:15.447
<v Speaker 4>You don't need to have watched it to kind of

0:27:15.527 --> 0:27:18.127
<v Speaker 4>understand the dynamic, which is that you've got Nicole Kidman,

0:27:18.207 --> 0:27:19.927
<v Speaker 4>who's a woman. What do you think she's meant to

0:27:19.927 --> 0:27:22.967
<v Speaker 4>be fifty early early fifties. She has a daughter who's

0:27:23.007 --> 0:27:27.167
<v Speaker 4>twenty four, and she is sort of pursuing this romantic

0:27:27.207 --> 0:27:31.967
<v Speaker 4>interest and her daughter is horrified and disgusted and angry.

0:27:32.327 --> 0:27:35.087
<v Speaker 4>And it's this tension between being a good mother and

0:27:35.487 --> 0:27:37.887
<v Speaker 4>dating someone that you like. Right, what was he like

0:27:37.927 --> 0:27:39.287
<v Speaker 4>twenty years longer than you?

0:27:39.407 --> 0:27:40.447
<v Speaker 1>Sixteen? Oh?

0:27:41.127 --> 0:27:43.727
<v Speaker 6>Pardon me, I thought you're wor smarter than this mom?

0:27:44.007 --> 0:27:46.287
<v Speaker 4>To fuck with this love bombing bullshit.

0:27:46.327 --> 0:27:48.087
<v Speaker 1>I mean, you don't care how I feel about this.

0:27:48.487 --> 0:27:50.367
<v Speaker 4>And I was watching it. I know there's a lot

0:27:50.367 --> 0:27:53.447
<v Speaker 4>of angles out of that movie, but thinking, maye, you're

0:27:53.447 --> 0:27:57.487
<v Speaker 4>twenty four, like get out of your parents' house. The

0:27:57.567 --> 0:28:00.087
<v Speaker 4>idea was always have heard women say I'll wait till

0:28:00.087 --> 0:28:02.087
<v Speaker 4>my kids leave school and then I'll think about dating.

0:28:02.407 --> 0:28:05.207
<v Speaker 4>But now because their kids never move out, it's like

0:28:05.447 --> 0:28:06.167
<v Speaker 4>you've got.

0:28:06.167 --> 0:28:07.927
<v Speaker 1>Or getting a divorce. That used to be the thing,

0:28:07.967 --> 0:28:09.967
<v Speaker 1>like we just stay together until the kids have finished

0:28:09.967 --> 0:28:10.767
<v Speaker 1>school and left home.

0:28:10.887 --> 0:28:12.807
<v Speaker 4>So you just put it off and off and off

0:28:13.487 --> 0:28:15.647
<v Speaker 4>until it's like you've got a twenty four year old

0:28:15.727 --> 0:28:18.607
<v Speaker 4>daughter who still has emotional needs and you can't have

0:28:18.647 --> 0:28:19.407
<v Speaker 4>a relationship.

0:28:19.647 --> 0:28:22.127
<v Speaker 2>This is what it made me wonder, right because basically

0:28:22.127 --> 0:28:23.407
<v Speaker 2>there's a bit in this and I wrote it down

0:28:23.407 --> 0:28:24.767
<v Speaker 2>because I wanted to ask me how what she thought.

0:28:25.487 --> 0:28:28.527
<v Speaker 2>Basically in the movie, the daughter is asking her mum

0:28:28.647 --> 0:28:30.967
<v Speaker 2>or telling her mom that please do not date this

0:28:31.047 --> 0:28:32.767
<v Speaker 2>man for a lot of reasons that you don't need

0:28:32.807 --> 0:28:35.367
<v Speaker 2>to worry about here, but do not date this man.

0:28:35.567 --> 0:28:38.447
<v Speaker 2>And the conundrum that is posed here is, as a

0:28:38.447 --> 0:28:40.967
<v Speaker 2>good mother, do you date this man even though your

0:28:41.007 --> 0:28:43.367
<v Speaker 2>adult daughter really doesn't want you to. And what it

0:28:43.407 --> 0:28:47.327
<v Speaker 2>made me think is does the endless parenting which we've

0:28:47.367 --> 0:28:50.087
<v Speaker 2>just said caused by all these things mean that once

0:28:50.127 --> 0:28:53.087
<v Speaker 2>you become a parent, once you have a child, every

0:28:53.167 --> 0:28:56.687
<v Speaker 2>single choice you make from now on, not for five years,

0:28:56.687 --> 0:29:00.367
<v Speaker 2>not for ten, not for twenty, but forever, have to

0:29:00.527 --> 0:29:05.327
<v Speaker 2>center that person as the number one decision making factor

0:29:05.687 --> 0:29:09.447
<v Speaker 2>forevermore so, whether that's who you date, what job you take,

0:29:09.767 --> 0:29:11.807
<v Speaker 2>where you choose to live, maybe you choose to move

0:29:11.847 --> 0:29:13.527
<v Speaker 2>away from them even though they'd like you to be

0:29:13.527 --> 0:29:16.047
<v Speaker 2>the nanny for their kid all the time, whether that's

0:29:16.567 --> 0:29:18.847
<v Speaker 2>spending your money rather than saving it, or giving it

0:29:18.887 --> 0:29:20.487
<v Speaker 2>to them to buy a house, Like any of the

0:29:20.527 --> 0:29:23.847
<v Speaker 2>decisions you make about your life, they should be the

0:29:23.967 --> 0:29:27.127
<v Speaker 2>number one factor what I think. Do you think that's true?

0:29:27.207 --> 0:29:31.207
<v Speaker 1>That's not how I read this, and that's being resected. No,

0:29:31.367 --> 0:29:34.447
<v Speaker 1>that was not my takeaway from this idea that parents

0:29:34.487 --> 0:29:37.407
<v Speaker 1>are the new friends, because in a friendship, it's not

0:29:37.447 --> 0:29:41.007
<v Speaker 1>a parent child relationship, right, you become kind of equals.

0:29:41.327 --> 0:29:44.567
<v Speaker 1>So Jesse and I are really good examples of, you know,

0:29:44.647 --> 0:29:48.247
<v Speaker 1>both even before our families became connected. The kinds of

0:29:48.287 --> 0:29:52.287
<v Speaker 1>relationships we have with our parents, and for me with

0:29:52.407 --> 0:29:55.607
<v Speaker 1>my growing up and grown up children is much more

0:29:55.607 --> 0:29:59.847
<v Speaker 1>ameshed than perhaps of different generations and in your experience,

0:29:59.887 --> 0:30:02.807
<v Speaker 1>and not everyone is like that now. But it's not

0:30:03.047 --> 0:30:07.127
<v Speaker 1>about you always stay in that parent child dynamic, which

0:30:07.167 --> 0:30:09.767
<v Speaker 1>is what that movie was, a real parent child dynamic

0:30:09.767 --> 0:30:12.127
<v Speaker 1>where the child was just not she was being a dick.

0:30:12.487 --> 0:30:14.727
<v Speaker 2>But we all know people right who their kids have said,

0:30:14.767 --> 0:30:17.407
<v Speaker 2>don't do that thing. Yeah, why you're making well call.

0:30:17.447 --> 0:30:19.407
<v Speaker 1>As faith Hill wrote, she said, this doesn't mean that

0:30:19.447 --> 0:30:21.847
<v Speaker 1>adult kids are failing to launch or that their parents

0:30:21.887 --> 0:30:25.967
<v Speaker 1>are suffering. Rather, the way our society understands child rearing

0:30:26.087 --> 0:30:29.047
<v Speaker 1>is evolving. The assignment, which was once to raise an

0:30:29.087 --> 0:30:31.927
<v Speaker 1>independent child and set them off into the world, is

0:30:32.007 --> 0:30:36.207
<v Speaker 1>now to foster a deep, lasting relationship with them as friends.

0:30:36.727 --> 0:30:38.967
<v Speaker 1>So it's not like, right, it's a fixed period of time.

0:30:39.167 --> 0:30:41.887
<v Speaker 1>Then you go off into the world and we not

0:30:41.927 --> 0:30:44.567
<v Speaker 1>go our separate ways, but we have a different relationship. Now.

0:30:44.567 --> 0:30:47.527
<v Speaker 1>It's like, well, once you grow up, we will transition

0:30:48.127 --> 0:30:51.447
<v Speaker 1>into being friends and we will stay close and talk

0:30:51.527 --> 0:30:53.487
<v Speaker 1>all the time in the same way that romantic partners

0:30:53.767 --> 0:30:54.487
<v Speaker 1>or friends would.

0:30:54.567 --> 0:30:57.927
<v Speaker 4>I reckon that's Pollyanna, though, because a family affair as

0:30:57.967 --> 0:31:01.247
<v Speaker 4>well as what zi Anne Hathaway the Idler review I

0:31:01.247 --> 0:31:03.847
<v Speaker 4>dea review. Right, So there's two films very similar in

0:31:03.887 --> 0:31:05.607
<v Speaker 4>a very short period of time. So they're trying to

0:31:05.607 --> 0:31:09.527
<v Speaker 4>tell us something. Both women in this similar ages had

0:31:09.607 --> 0:31:12.367
<v Speaker 4>adult daughters living at home, and the dynamic at the

0:31:12.407 --> 0:31:14.567
<v Speaker 4>beginning of the films was that they were just make

0:31:14.887 --> 0:31:17.287
<v Speaker 4>they were friends, and they were talking about work and

0:31:17.487 --> 0:31:20.647
<v Speaker 4>life and quite equal equal partnership.

0:31:20.767 --> 0:31:22.767
<v Speaker 1>Well, in the idea of you, even though she looked

0:31:22.807 --> 0:31:24.847
<v Speaker 1>like she was about twenty five, she was meant to

0:31:24.847 --> 0:31:26.967
<v Speaker 1>be a teenager because remember she went to summer camp,

0:31:27.127 --> 0:31:28.567
<v Speaker 1>so she was still in high school.

0:31:28.607 --> 0:31:30.367
<v Speaker 4>She went to college at the end, so there was

0:31:30.367 --> 0:31:33.767
<v Speaker 4>something she was kind of getting into adulthood. But then

0:31:34.127 --> 0:31:38.327
<v Speaker 4>there was a cornerstone moment in both films where the

0:31:38.487 --> 0:31:42.687
<v Speaker 4>parent relationship was kind of takes takes priority.

0:31:43.407 --> 0:31:46.007
<v Speaker 1>The children demanded that of their mother. Well the girls did.

0:31:46.127 --> 0:31:48.047
<v Speaker 4>Yes, And so I think that what they were also

0:31:48.127 --> 0:31:51.047
<v Speaker 4>trying to say, or what these films are trying to

0:31:51.127 --> 0:31:57.487
<v Speaker 4>interrogate or look at culturally, is whether desire can coexist

0:31:57.567 --> 0:32:00.967
<v Speaker 4>with motherhood and the idea that it can is revolutionary,

0:32:01.767 --> 0:32:06.127
<v Speaker 4>but it can only coexist if you are given permission

0:32:06.687 --> 0:32:12.087
<v Speaker 4>from the child, which is this really kind of sick codependency.

0:32:12.367 --> 0:32:15.487
<v Speaker 2>And also I find it really interesting that idea that

0:32:15.927 --> 0:32:20.487
<v Speaker 2>even once they're adults, you have to prioritize their needs, Like,

0:32:20.527 --> 0:32:21.687
<v Speaker 2>I find that really interesting.

0:32:22.007 --> 0:32:25.167
<v Speaker 4>And in fact, because I was thinking with a family affair, right,

0:32:25.807 --> 0:32:28.087
<v Speaker 4>I was thinking about the child parent relationship and then

0:32:28.087 --> 0:32:32.487
<v Speaker 4>I went there were moments in that where in fact

0:32:32.527 --> 0:32:34.847
<v Speaker 4>the child was parenting the mother. A lot of her

0:32:34.887 --> 0:32:36.687
<v Speaker 4>concerns were like, oh, but you're going to get hurt,

0:32:36.727 --> 0:32:39.007
<v Speaker 4>You're going to get and I keep coming across this

0:32:39.047 --> 0:32:42.007
<v Speaker 4>word it's sort of therapy speak, but it's parentification. You

0:32:42.127 --> 0:32:44.927
<v Speaker 4>had a miss and it occurs when parents look to

0:32:44.967 --> 0:32:49.047
<v Speaker 4>their children for emotional or practical support rather than providing it.

0:32:49.727 --> 0:32:52.327
<v Speaker 4>And I think there are a lot of people who

0:32:52.407 --> 0:32:56.007
<v Speaker 4>with their enmeshment with their parents, often experience this either

0:32:56.047 --> 0:32:58.767
<v Speaker 4>with one or with both, where they're living together and

0:32:58.807 --> 0:33:01.647
<v Speaker 4>they feel like the roles have been reversed, where suddenly

0:33:02.367 --> 0:33:07.287
<v Speaker 4>the parent child dynamic exists. But it can invert, but

0:33:07.327 --> 0:33:08.287
<v Speaker 4>it should.

0:33:08.047 --> 0:33:10.007
<v Speaker 1>Invert if you look, but it follow it to its

0:33:10.087 --> 0:33:13.447
<v Speaker 1>natural conclusion. We will be looking after our aging parents

0:33:13.487 --> 0:33:16.807
<v Speaker 1>if they're thankfully lived to a ripe old age. It

0:33:16.887 --> 0:33:20.647
<v Speaker 1>does invert, and in its extreme forms people talk about

0:33:20.727 --> 0:33:23.727
<v Speaker 1>changing their parents' nappies at the end of life. That's

0:33:23.767 --> 0:33:25.527
<v Speaker 1>in its extreme form. The way I see this is

0:33:25.567 --> 0:33:27.327
<v Speaker 1>the onness isn't just on the parent to parent forever,

0:33:27.367 --> 0:33:28.847
<v Speaker 1>because I agree with you that sounds like a very

0:33:28.847 --> 0:33:32.207
<v Speaker 1>bad deal, and be selfless and not be an actualized person.

0:33:32.287 --> 0:33:35.927
<v Speaker 1>The onus is also on the young adult to stop

0:33:35.967 --> 0:33:40.087
<v Speaker 1>seeing their parent as mummy and daddy and start seeing

0:33:40.087 --> 0:33:42.207
<v Speaker 1>them as a woman or a man who has their

0:33:42.247 --> 0:33:45.287
<v Speaker 1>own wants, needs, flaws, flaws.

0:33:45.527 --> 0:33:48.287
<v Speaker 2>I think that's trickier than it's ever been right because

0:33:48.447 --> 0:33:50.847
<v Speaker 2>of what we've done to parenting over the past couple

0:33:50.887 --> 0:33:53.727
<v Speaker 2>of generations, which is the model for motherhood. Even as

0:33:53.767 --> 0:33:56.207
<v Speaker 2>women's lives have become more crowded and more demanding with

0:33:56.327 --> 0:34:00.567
<v Speaker 2>outside the house work and all those responsibilities, a model

0:34:00.567 --> 0:34:05.567
<v Speaker 2>of motherhood is still this all consuming, self sacrificing thing.

0:34:05.727 --> 0:34:09.487
<v Speaker 2>The kind of ideal mummy on the Instagram is she's

0:34:09.487 --> 0:34:11.567
<v Speaker 2>only ever thinking of her baby, and she's only ever

0:34:11.847 --> 0:34:15.447
<v Speaker 2>making amazing food for them from the you know, virgin

0:34:15.567 --> 0:34:19.047
<v Speaker 2>organic pumpkins from wherever, you know, Like it's that model,

0:34:19.807 --> 0:34:23.567
<v Speaker 2>and so we've made that the model of parenting that

0:34:23.607 --> 0:34:26.247
<v Speaker 2>we like, and then we also seem to be extending

0:34:26.287 --> 0:34:28.287
<v Speaker 2>the amount of time you're supposed to do it for

0:34:28.887 --> 0:34:31.247
<v Speaker 2>I remember very clearly when I was young that the

0:34:31.327 --> 0:34:34.007
<v Speaker 2>sort of typical gen X parenting that I got well

0:34:34.047 --> 0:34:36.487
<v Speaker 2>as in from the boomers, but I'm gen X, was

0:34:36.527 --> 0:34:39.647
<v Speaker 2>that sort of they call it benign neglect, which I'm

0:34:39.687 --> 0:34:42.407
<v Speaker 2>fine with, Like that was fine for me. But I

0:34:42.607 --> 0:34:45.287
<v Speaker 2>was very aware alway is that my parents were people.

0:34:45.487 --> 0:34:48.767
<v Speaker 2>They had interests outside the home. They had jobs and

0:34:48.887 --> 0:34:52.527
<v Speaker 2>friends and lives and interests and things they wanted to

0:34:52.527 --> 0:34:56.407
<v Speaker 2>do that weren't really about me and my brother and personally,

0:34:56.807 --> 0:34:59.767
<v Speaker 2>and I know you can't generalize, but that's okay. And

0:34:59.887 --> 0:35:02.927
<v Speaker 2>I try and model that to my kids. Right It's like,

0:35:02.967 --> 0:35:04.967
<v Speaker 2>I love you to bits the center of my world,

0:35:05.007 --> 0:35:08.767
<v Speaker 2>blah blah. But I'm a human and Dad is a human,

0:35:09.047 --> 0:35:11.327
<v Speaker 2>and we also have needs too, and we also have

0:35:11.647 --> 0:35:13.727
<v Speaker 2>things we want to achieve and all those things. So

0:35:13.807 --> 0:35:17.447
<v Speaker 2>I think it's become harder than ever for kids who

0:35:17.487 --> 0:35:20.527
<v Speaker 2>were moving into that early adult phase to start seeing

0:35:20.567 --> 0:35:23.447
<v Speaker 2>their parents are separate from themselves, because we've pushed that

0:35:23.527 --> 0:35:26.807
<v Speaker 2>and meshment, and we've also pushed the job of parenting

0:35:26.927 --> 0:35:29.007
<v Speaker 2>into this all encompassing existence.

0:35:29.287 --> 0:35:31.807
<v Speaker 1>I think also what I've always noticed as my children

0:35:31.847 --> 0:35:35.247
<v Speaker 1>have grown up is that helicopter parenting, of which I

0:35:35.287 --> 0:35:38.007
<v Speaker 1>am very much a helicopter parent because Gen X's are

0:35:38.007 --> 0:35:41.567
<v Speaker 1>the first generation to have got that memo in the hospital,

0:35:41.607 --> 0:35:43.887
<v Speaker 1>Hey make sure nothing bad ever happens to this child.

0:35:43.887 --> 0:35:46.727
<v Speaker 1>Their self esteem and their lack of having a negative

0:35:46.767 --> 0:35:51.527
<v Speaker 1>emotion is your performance review. Helicopter parents make helicopter children.

0:35:52.047 --> 0:35:55.087
<v Speaker 1>So when you sort of go, right, okay, off you go,

0:35:55.247 --> 0:35:58.127
<v Speaker 1>and when you throw COVID into that as well, when

0:35:58.127 --> 0:36:00.767
<v Speaker 1>they couldn't leave the house, then suddenly the cage doors

0:36:00.767 --> 0:36:03.207
<v Speaker 1>were thrown open, and the kids didn't want to go

0:36:03.287 --> 0:36:07.887
<v Speaker 1>outside because they'd been inside for so long and they'd

0:36:07.927 --> 0:36:09.967
<v Speaker 1>almost depending on what age they are, they sort of

0:36:09.967 --> 0:36:12.287
<v Speaker 1>missed that stage of their development. So it's hard to

0:36:12.287 --> 0:36:15.887
<v Speaker 1>sort of helicopter, helicopter, helicopter and then just go right, well,

0:36:15.927 --> 0:36:18.567
<v Speaker 1>you're eighteen, I'm landing the helicopter. You're on your own bye,

0:36:19.047 --> 0:36:21.127
<v Speaker 1>because they're like, wait what. I don't know.

0:36:21.447 --> 0:36:23.127
<v Speaker 2>When I was growing up, I had a friend whose

0:36:23.127 --> 0:36:25.207
<v Speaker 2>family you had to move our eighteen the on your

0:36:25.207 --> 0:36:27.487
<v Speaker 2>eighteenth birthday, you had to move out that with that,

0:36:28.007 --> 0:36:30.807
<v Speaker 2>we all used to be kind of incredulous at that,

0:36:30.887 --> 0:36:33.127
<v Speaker 2>but also there was a lot of grudging respect for it.

0:36:33.207 --> 0:36:34.607
<v Speaker 2>And I was sent to bread the other day.

0:36:34.607 --> 0:36:35.447
<v Speaker 3>Can we implement that?

0:36:35.847 --> 0:36:38.167
<v Speaker 2>I don't know that we can because times have changed,

0:36:38.207 --> 0:36:40.887
<v Speaker 2>things are expensive, But twenty one, surely, come on out

0:36:40.887 --> 0:36:41.607
<v Speaker 2>of the fucking house.

0:36:41.687 --> 0:36:43.927
<v Speaker 1>Colie. You'll just move to a different state. I know you.

0:36:44.007 --> 0:36:46.487
<v Speaker 2>I definitely will, and I won't tell them where.

0:36:47.247 --> 0:36:49.767
<v Speaker 1>No forwarding address. I love you, but it's time for

0:36:49.807 --> 0:36:52.087
<v Speaker 1>you to go, and if you don't, I will.

0:36:55.047 --> 0:36:58.327
<v Speaker 4>Every Tuesday and Thursday we drop new segments of Mummy

0:36:58.287 --> 0:37:01.647
<v Speaker 4>are out Loud just for Mummy A subscribers follow the

0:37:01.687 --> 0:37:03.727
<v Speaker 4>link in the show notes to get your daily dose

0:37:03.767 --> 0:37:06.047
<v Speaker 4>of out Loud and a big thank you to all

0:37:06.167 --> 0:37:07.727
<v Speaker 4>our current subscribers.

0:37:14.647 --> 0:37:17.647
<v Speaker 2>Can someone please tell Sarah that all her friends hate her?

0:37:18.167 --> 0:37:21.647
<v Speaker 2>People are posting strangers bitch sessions on TikTok, and Sarah

0:37:21.807 --> 0:37:25.127
<v Speaker 2>is a good example. Stranger gossip is a thing. So

0:37:25.247 --> 0:37:27.567
<v Speaker 2>let's say that a woman films a group of women

0:37:27.647 --> 0:37:29.247
<v Speaker 2>she doesn't know bitching about Sarah.

0:37:29.247 --> 0:37:29.847
<v Speaker 3>Maybe you're in.

0:37:29.767 --> 0:37:32.247
<v Speaker 2>A queue at the coffee shop, or you're in the

0:37:32.367 --> 0:37:34.687
<v Speaker 2>park eating your sandwich or whatever. There's a group of

0:37:34.687 --> 0:37:40.247
<v Speaker 2>women nearby and they're bitching about Sarah. You surreptitiously film them.

0:37:40.567 --> 0:37:44.127
<v Speaker 2>You post that video, and you say, look at these

0:37:44.127 --> 0:37:47.087
<v Speaker 2>bitches bitching about Sarah. If anyone knows Sarah, they should

0:37:47.087 --> 0:37:52.007
<v Speaker 2>tell her. Right. The arching assumption about this trend is

0:37:52.047 --> 0:37:53.807
<v Speaker 2>a stop the Internet. I want to get off because

0:37:53.927 --> 0:37:58.367
<v Speaker 2>fu and b all gossiping is a bad thing, right,

0:37:58.527 --> 0:38:01.167
<v Speaker 2>Having a little vent about someone in your life is

0:38:01.407 --> 0:38:05.367
<v Speaker 2>bad and dirty and it needs to be exposed immediately,

0:38:05.407 --> 0:38:07.927
<v Speaker 2>and you need to be called out. Jesse, you love

0:38:07.967 --> 0:38:12.247
<v Speaker 2>a gossip? I do, please defend the women coming for Sarah.

0:38:12.327 --> 0:38:17.167
<v Speaker 4>I'm going to defend gossiping and defend the people bitching

0:38:17.167 --> 0:38:21.527
<v Speaker 4>about Sarah. Firstly, Sarah might in fact probably deserves it.

0:38:22.367 --> 0:38:24.127
<v Speaker 1>I don't know, objectively annoying.

0:38:24.327 --> 0:38:28.007
<v Speaker 4>I think's bitch, And in fact I would like to

0:38:28.127 --> 0:38:30.527
<v Speaker 4>know why Sarah's a bitch, and I could probably get involved.

0:38:30.567 --> 0:38:32.687
<v Speaker 4>I don't know her, but like I have an opinion.

0:38:32.567 --> 0:38:35.127
<v Speaker 2>Sarah tries too hard. Yes, Sarah follows your x on

0:38:35.167 --> 0:38:38.167
<v Speaker 2>Instagram exactly, Sarah got that job you wanted. Sarah's got

0:38:38.207 --> 0:38:39.167
<v Speaker 2>terrible tasting shoes.

0:38:39.327 --> 0:38:41.207
<v Speaker 1>To me, this is like wiki leaks. There are some

0:38:41.287 --> 0:38:44.047
<v Speaker 1>things that need to be secret, and you don't need

0:38:44.087 --> 0:38:47.407
<v Speaker 1>them spread all over the Internet for the society to

0:38:47.447 --> 0:38:50.247
<v Speaker 1>function and then not to be anarchy in the streets

0:38:50.287 --> 0:38:53.407
<v Speaker 1>and in our group chats, we need some privacy to

0:38:53.527 --> 0:38:54.807
<v Speaker 1>talk about people.

0:38:55.007 --> 0:38:59.127
<v Speaker 4>And talking about people is so important to social cohesion, Yes,

0:38:59.207 --> 0:39:03.887
<v Speaker 4>and a thriving democracy. For the person spoken about Holly,

0:39:04.127 --> 0:39:07.447
<v Speaker 4>and they won't know if this bitch isn't recording it.

0:39:07.447 --> 0:39:10.407
<v Speaker 1>It's called TikTok tattle tale. I don't like it, and

0:39:10.447 --> 0:39:12.887
<v Speaker 1>the Internet's full of it. It's very upsetting. I don't

0:39:12.967 --> 0:39:15.687
<v Speaker 1>like it because I also am like there's a real person.

0:39:15.887 --> 0:39:18.487
<v Speaker 1>The people who are doing this and exposing these conversations

0:39:18.487 --> 0:39:21.687
<v Speaker 1>and sharing them act as though they're these vigilantes that

0:39:21.727 --> 0:39:23.207
<v Speaker 1>are helping Sarah.

0:39:23.407 --> 0:39:25.007
<v Speaker 2>How Sarah gon to feel.

0:39:24.727 --> 0:39:27.447
<v Speaker 4>They're ruining Sarah's day. That doesn't make you know.

0:39:27.447 --> 0:39:30.047
<v Speaker 1>That my friendship, You're only going to upset Sarah.

0:39:30.287 --> 0:39:33.687
<v Speaker 4>And the thing about gossiping is that when you are

0:39:33.767 --> 0:39:36.967
<v Speaker 4>talking to your friends about something that's occurred, or you're

0:39:37.007 --> 0:39:41.727
<v Speaker 4>prosecuting a dilemma you've had, what you're really doing is

0:39:41.767 --> 0:39:45.247
<v Speaker 4>you're talking about morals and ethics and trying to understand

0:39:45.247 --> 0:39:48.247
<v Speaker 4>the world around you. It's also a bid for connection.

0:39:48.367 --> 0:39:50.007
<v Speaker 4>We've talked about bids off.

0:39:50.047 --> 0:39:50.647
<v Speaker 2>It's a pebble.

0:39:50.847 --> 0:39:54.087
<v Speaker 1>It's a pebble exactly as a bid for connection where we're.

0:39:53.927 --> 0:39:56.967
<v Speaker 2>Trying to go Sarah, I hate Sarah, let's connect.

0:39:57.047 --> 0:40:00.567
<v Speaker 4>Yes, you're also going I trust you enough to tell

0:40:00.607 --> 0:40:03.807
<v Speaker 4>you I hate Sarah. So this is about trust, it's

0:40:03.847 --> 0:40:08.047
<v Speaker 4>about venting, it's about taking off a certain amount of baggage. Look,

0:40:08.087 --> 0:40:10.807
<v Speaker 4>it's not always is good, but it's how a lot

0:40:10.847 --> 0:40:12.167
<v Speaker 4>of connections.

0:40:12.447 --> 0:40:16.007
<v Speaker 2>Question can I ask a question right? And I know

0:40:16.087 --> 0:40:18.967
<v Speaker 2>I'm playing Pollyanna in this situation, when you have sat

0:40:19.047 --> 0:40:22.247
<v Speaker 2>down with your friend's sister, workmates, whatever, and had a

0:40:22.287 --> 0:40:26.247
<v Speaker 2>really good bitch about somebody, like, you've just sledged them. Me,

0:40:26.967 --> 0:40:28.607
<v Speaker 2>you've just sledged them for twenty minutes.

0:40:28.687 --> 0:40:28.847
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

0:40:29.127 --> 0:40:30.967
<v Speaker 2>Do you walk out of that room feeling good? Or

0:40:30.967 --> 0:40:32.207
<v Speaker 2>do you walk out of that room feeling like you

0:40:32.247 --> 0:40:32.807
<v Speaker 2>need a shower?

0:40:33.127 --> 0:40:36.127
<v Speaker 1>Yes, that's how I feel. I need, whether it's in

0:40:36.127 --> 0:40:40.567
<v Speaker 1>the room, or it's in a group, or in a shower. Shower, shower, absolutely, shower.

0:40:40.727 --> 0:40:42.607
<v Speaker 4>So I was reading this article on The Guardian recently

0:40:42.607 --> 0:40:45.287
<v Speaker 4>about different types of friendships. Right, You've got the common

0:40:45.407 --> 0:40:47.927
<v Speaker 4>enemy friend, which means that you bonded over a shared

0:40:47.927 --> 0:40:49.087
<v Speaker 4>hatred of someone.

0:40:48.887 --> 0:40:50.567
<v Speaker 2>Or something that's very often at work.

0:40:50.767 --> 0:40:50.967
<v Speaker 3>Yep.

0:40:51.247 --> 0:40:53.767
<v Speaker 4>Now, whenever that person annoys you, you go, I'm going

0:40:53.847 --> 0:40:55.607
<v Speaker 4>to go to them because that's our connection. Right. And

0:40:55.647 --> 0:40:58.287
<v Speaker 4>there's also another type of friend called the resting bitch friend,

0:40:58.607 --> 0:41:00.687
<v Speaker 4>and they're harsher than you. I have a friend like this,

0:41:00.967 --> 0:41:03.127
<v Speaker 4>She's harsher than me. So when you need to get

0:41:03.167 --> 0:41:05.167
<v Speaker 4>something out that's mean spirited and bitchy, you go to

0:41:05.247 --> 0:41:08.007
<v Speaker 4>them and they take it one step further and you're like, yeah, yeah, yeah,

0:41:08.087 --> 0:41:11.047
<v Speaker 4>Now the common enemy friend in defense. I have a

0:41:11.047 --> 0:41:12.847
<v Speaker 4>friend at the moment that's not very well. She's going

0:41:12.847 --> 0:41:15.007
<v Speaker 4>through a very very hard time. We have a common enemy,

0:41:15.687 --> 0:41:17.887
<v Speaker 4>and when she's having a bad day, you chair her

0:41:18.007 --> 0:41:21.047
<v Speaker 4>up with I'm chair her up with a little.

0:41:20.847 --> 0:41:25.167
<v Speaker 1>Bit of a chat about that common enemy. Yes, yeah, distraction.

0:41:25.487 --> 0:41:27.287
<v Speaker 4>It's just a bit of distraction. It's a bit of

0:41:27.327 --> 0:41:31.047
<v Speaker 4>a connection, it is. And again it's going I'm just

0:41:31.087 --> 0:41:33.407
<v Speaker 4>going to test my reality here, because what this person

0:41:33.407 --> 0:41:37.367
<v Speaker 4>we're talking about is doing seems bizarre, seems unethical, seems mean,

0:41:37.447 --> 0:41:40.567
<v Speaker 4>seems whatever. And you and I connecting over that is

0:41:40.647 --> 0:41:45.407
<v Speaker 4>just giving you a second to not think about existential shit.

0:41:45.767 --> 0:41:49.167
<v Speaker 4>It seems like I am going to I'm.

0:41:49.007 --> 0:41:51.807
<v Speaker 1>Going to say two things about this quickly. Firstly, I

0:41:51.887 --> 0:41:54.327
<v Speaker 1>do that too, but for a different reason. You know

0:41:54.367 --> 0:41:57.887
<v Speaker 1>that Reddit thread am I the Asshole? I'll often do

0:41:57.967 --> 0:42:00.567
<v Speaker 1>it as a reality check where I will go and

0:42:00.647 --> 0:42:03.247
<v Speaker 1>I will need to see how I feel about something

0:42:03.287 --> 0:42:06.767
<v Speaker 1>mirrored back by someone else who will meet my intensity

0:42:07.007 --> 0:42:09.807
<v Speaker 1>of irritation, frustration, loathing.

0:42:10.607 --> 0:42:12.567
<v Speaker 4>But am I the asshole? Is always really funny, right,

0:42:12.607 --> 0:42:14.407
<v Speaker 4>because you would only have asked that question if you

0:42:14.407 --> 0:42:16.687
<v Speaker 4>don't think you're being the asshole, If you come to me,

0:42:16.727 --> 0:42:19.247
<v Speaker 4>and God, am I being the asshole? This person is

0:42:19.247 --> 0:42:20.007
<v Speaker 4>a total.

0:42:19.727 --> 0:42:23.207
<v Speaker 1>Bitch and put so you're looking for people to go

0:42:23.927 --> 0:42:26.487
<v Speaker 1>no validation, So I'm looking for validation. The second thing

0:42:26.527 --> 0:42:28.327
<v Speaker 1>I'm going to say about this is that I have

0:42:28.887 --> 0:42:32.367
<v Speaker 1>had a very clarifying experience many years ago where I

0:42:32.527 --> 0:42:35.567
<v Speaker 1>was having a bitch with a mutual friend about someone

0:42:35.567 --> 0:42:40.607
<v Speaker 1>else and my phone accidentally rang them.

0:42:39.167 --> 0:42:45.047
<v Speaker 4>And they heard it, and that's actually my worst night.

0:42:45.447 --> 0:42:48.487
<v Speaker 1>And it also sounded worse than it actually was, Like

0:42:48.527 --> 0:42:51.647
<v Speaker 1>I am the part of the conversation, well it did.

0:42:51.927 --> 0:42:55.327
<v Speaker 1>The part of the conversation they heard sounded worse than

0:42:55.367 --> 0:42:59.887
<v Speaker 1>the whole context of the conversation. Anyway, our friendship managed

0:42:59.927 --> 0:43:02.487
<v Speaker 1>to survive, and it was touch and go. And what

0:43:02.607 --> 0:43:06.767
<v Speaker 1>it's done is that it's always been every time I'm

0:43:06.767 --> 0:43:09.727
<v Speaker 1>bitching about someone I love, because sometimes, I mean, everyone

0:43:09.807 --> 0:43:12.967
<v Speaker 1>fucks you off, right, I'm always thinking about that.

0:43:13.407 --> 0:43:15.687
<v Speaker 4>You're thinking about a check, but I've seen you actually

0:43:15.807 --> 0:43:19.047
<v Speaker 4>check your phone, and when you realize that, then.

0:43:18.967 --> 0:43:21.687
<v Speaker 1>I'll just turn my face silent. Here's my thak the battery.

0:43:21.847 --> 0:43:24.527
<v Speaker 2>If we are operating from a position where we're going

0:43:24.727 --> 0:43:27.887
<v Speaker 2>bitching about people is fine, then we have to be

0:43:27.927 --> 0:43:29.847
<v Speaker 2>fine with being bitched about I am.

0:43:30.047 --> 0:43:34.887
<v Speaker 1>That has to be fine. People don't do it behind

0:43:34.927 --> 0:43:37.607
<v Speaker 1>you back. They do it literally on your own Instagram page.

0:43:37.927 --> 0:43:40.767
<v Speaker 2>But I don't know if that's true, Jesse Stevens, because,

0:43:40.807 --> 0:43:42.847
<v Speaker 2>as discussed on this podcast more than once, you know

0:43:42.887 --> 0:43:46.127
<v Speaker 2>how to hold a grudge. And I'm not convinced that

0:43:46.167 --> 0:43:48.607
<v Speaker 2>if you overheard a couple of people bitching about you

0:43:48.687 --> 0:43:51.127
<v Speaker 2>in the kitchen, they wouldn't go straight on your.

0:43:51.007 --> 0:43:54.047
<v Speaker 4>Ship list the issue that they bitched badly. But I'm

0:43:54.047 --> 0:43:54.807
<v Speaker 4>also because.

0:43:55.247 --> 0:43:57.567
<v Speaker 1>You too must. I just know when you two are like, oh,

0:43:57.607 --> 0:44:00.327
<v Speaker 1>that fucking she is such like I just know.

0:44:00.527 --> 0:44:01.647
<v Speaker 4>Have you ever tried to pitch with Holli?

0:44:02.407 --> 0:44:05.127
<v Speaker 1>She's difficult to beat? And you know what, I really

0:44:05.247 --> 0:44:06.967
<v Speaker 1>value the people in my life have got quite a

0:44:06.967 --> 0:44:09.647
<v Speaker 1>few of them who just dead bat you when you

0:44:09.727 --> 0:44:13.247
<v Speaker 1>do it. And it's also quite frustrating in the moment,

0:44:13.367 --> 0:44:15.767
<v Speaker 1>but ultimately it makes me a better person. I will

0:44:15.807 --> 0:44:18.807
<v Speaker 1>be drawn then I feel ashamed of myself. It's very

0:44:18.847 --> 0:44:21.287
<v Speaker 1>hard to draw you in every holiday, it is, Jesse's

0:44:21.367 --> 0:44:21.847
<v Speaker 1>much Alia.

0:44:23.807 --> 0:44:26.687
<v Speaker 4>I was listening to a podcasts recently which elucidated to

0:44:26.687 --> 0:44:28.767
<v Speaker 4>me why why I need a good gossip every now

0:44:28.807 --> 0:44:31.807
<v Speaker 4>and then. It was with a psychologist called Dr Emily Musgrove,

0:44:32.287 --> 0:44:35.447
<v Speaker 4>and she was saying that the people who gospel a lot,

0:44:35.567 --> 0:44:37.527
<v Speaker 4>who bitch a lot, who complain a lot, are the

0:44:37.607 --> 0:44:40.927
<v Speaker 4>people who don't know how to set boundaries. So your

0:44:41.007 --> 0:44:44.167
<v Speaker 4>way of asserting your boundaries, so, for example, MEA, because

0:44:44.167 --> 0:44:46.367
<v Speaker 4>I can't do it to your face. What I'll do

0:44:46.847 --> 0:44:48.367
<v Speaker 4>is I'll go and just bitch to Holly about the

0:44:48.407 --> 0:44:50.287
<v Speaker 4>ways in which you overstacked.

0:44:49.847 --> 0:44:52.967
<v Speaker 1>My boundary instead of going MEA, you're always late, can you? Yeah? Yeah,

0:44:53.087 --> 0:44:55.447
<v Speaker 1>and you always interrupt instead of being able to say

0:44:55.487 --> 0:44:57.247
<v Speaker 1>that to me, that's hard to say.

0:44:57.647 --> 0:44:58.047
<v Speaker 4>That's hard.

0:44:58.167 --> 0:44:58.367
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:44:58.487 --> 0:45:01.007
<v Speaker 1>I was going to say, have you noticed how cranky

0:45:01.007 --> 0:45:03.207
<v Speaker 1>Holly's been lately? And then I thought, I'll just say

0:45:03.207 --> 0:45:03.767
<v Speaker 1>it to Holly.

0:45:04.367 --> 0:45:06.927
<v Speaker 2>This is the thing, though, is that our relationship is

0:45:06.967 --> 0:45:10.007
<v Speaker 2>different to lots of relationships, right, because actually, don't bitch

0:45:10.007 --> 0:45:13.087
<v Speaker 2>about you very much, because it's like we can usually

0:45:13.127 --> 0:45:15.407
<v Speaker 2>address things like if we're attatchy with each other and

0:45:15.407 --> 0:45:17.967
<v Speaker 2>we feel the tension, we also know how to like, yeah,

0:45:18.207 --> 0:45:21.927
<v Speaker 2>that's much harder with some other friendships and some other relationships,

0:45:21.967 --> 0:45:25.887
<v Speaker 2>you're like, oh, there's something wrong here, either we have to,

0:45:25.967 --> 0:45:28.527
<v Speaker 2>you know, so I think it's a bit dependent.

0:45:28.847 --> 0:45:31.287
<v Speaker 1>Like I'm also very aware of how corrosive it is.

0:45:31.687 --> 0:45:34.127
<v Speaker 4>Oh, It's incredibly corrosive. And that's why I believe in

0:45:34.327 --> 0:45:40.287
<v Speaker 4>what I'll call cross circle bitching. So what I'll do, He's.

0:45:40.167 --> 0:45:42.287
<v Speaker 2>Going to vend rab bitching in order.

0:45:42.127 --> 0:45:43.047
<v Speaker 1>To so you can bitch.

0:45:43.807 --> 0:45:46.407
<v Speaker 4>You don't bitch with family to family. You don't bitch

0:45:46.447 --> 0:45:50.127
<v Speaker 4>with work to work. That's why I particularly like gossip

0:45:50.127 --> 0:45:50.887
<v Speaker 4>and bitching about people.

0:45:50.927 --> 0:45:53.607
<v Speaker 1>I don't know what's the difference between venting and bitching.

0:45:54.047 --> 0:45:56.487
<v Speaker 4>To me, I'm thinking it's the same. I mean, I'm

0:45:56.487 --> 0:45:58.567
<v Speaker 4>never gonna sit down and be like, have you seen

0:45:58.607 --> 0:45:59.207
<v Speaker 4>her eyebrows?

0:45:59.207 --> 0:45:59.847
<v Speaker 2>That's not my thing.

0:46:00.087 --> 0:46:03.567
<v Speaker 4>What I'm going to do is interrogate someone's behavior and

0:46:04.487 --> 0:46:06.567
<v Speaker 4>talk about how that made me feel. And it's probably

0:46:06.567 --> 0:46:09.167
<v Speaker 4>because in that moment I should have said or done

0:46:09.327 --> 0:46:10.847
<v Speaker 4>something that I didn't do.

0:46:10.847 --> 0:46:12.447
<v Speaker 1>Do you know what I'm going to advocate for is

0:46:12.527 --> 0:46:15.807
<v Speaker 1>more bitching in private and less fucking leaving horrible comments

0:46:15.967 --> 0:46:19.647
<v Speaker 1>and yeah, because remember when what social media has done

0:46:19.887 --> 0:46:24.607
<v Speaker 1>is that it's introduced performativeness into bitching. Yea, So it's

0:46:24.647 --> 0:46:26.767
<v Speaker 1>like I'm going to bitch about this person so that

0:46:26.887 --> 0:46:30.127
<v Speaker 1>I can get social status with all the people watching me, bitch.

0:46:30.287 --> 0:46:31.607
<v Speaker 1>And I think that is fun.

0:46:31.807 --> 0:46:34.487
<v Speaker 4>It's quite addictive to watch, and it's also rewarded, and

0:46:34.527 --> 0:46:36.727
<v Speaker 4>I've seen people do it. Like let's say there, you

0:46:36.767 --> 0:46:39.087
<v Speaker 4>know a brand or a something even you know we're

0:46:39.087 --> 0:46:41.207
<v Speaker 4>talking about witchery, not quite that, but let's say something

0:46:41.247 --> 0:46:43.287
<v Speaker 4>happened on an airline that you didn't like, and they'll get

0:46:43.327 --> 0:46:45.367
<v Speaker 4>their phone up and go blah blah blah. It's like,

0:46:45.407 --> 0:46:48.127
<v Speaker 4>you probably should have just told the airline because not

0:46:48.127 --> 0:46:51.287
<v Speaker 4>particularly interesting to us. I agree, don't put it on Instagram,

0:46:51.447 --> 0:46:54.047
<v Speaker 4>have a private chat, make sure the phone's off, make

0:46:54.087 --> 0:46:58.207
<v Speaker 4>sure you're not recording it, and then leave it. Speaking

0:46:58.247 --> 0:46:59.327
<v Speaker 4>of a gossip.

0:46:59.087 --> 0:47:02.127
<v Speaker 2>Oh this was a good one.

0:47:02.607 --> 0:47:04.967
<v Speaker 1>What we wait seguay. We didn't even deliberately plan.

0:47:04.967 --> 0:47:07.887
<v Speaker 4>This, but we were too ashamed to have this conversation

0:47:07.967 --> 0:47:09.767
<v Speaker 4>on the podcast, so we went to do it as

0:47:09.767 --> 0:47:14.287
<v Speaker 4>a subscribers. Our subscribers will understand. And there is a

0:47:14.287 --> 0:47:17.367
<v Speaker 4>blind item circulating at the moment about an incident that

0:47:17.407 --> 0:47:21.327
<v Speaker 4>occurred in Gwyneth Paltrow's house and someone apparently had a

0:47:21.367 --> 0:47:23.607
<v Speaker 4>bowel movement in one of her guest beds.

0:47:24.247 --> 0:47:28.207
<v Speaker 2>Actually we would guess cottages. We're not even certain about

0:47:28.527 --> 0:47:29.567
<v Speaker 2>the locations.

0:47:29.607 --> 0:47:31.847
<v Speaker 4>Well, what we had to do was talk about all

0:47:31.887 --> 0:47:34.207
<v Speaker 4>the details and then decide. And this is gossip at

0:47:34.247 --> 0:47:37.727
<v Speaker 4>its best. What would we have done? Right? What do

0:47:37.767 --> 0:47:39.727
<v Speaker 4>you do? Do you tell Gwyneth? Do you not?

0:47:40.007 --> 0:47:40.967
<v Speaker 1>What do we think happened?

0:47:41.047 --> 0:47:43.487
<v Speaker 4>What do ea thing happened? We talked about it for

0:47:43.487 --> 0:47:46.647
<v Speaker 4>too long. We did feel a bit dirty afterwards, but

0:47:46.767 --> 0:47:49.287
<v Speaker 4>it was fun while it lasted. So if you need

0:47:49.327 --> 0:47:53.487
<v Speaker 4>a gossip, go and listen to yesterday's Subs episode. Here's

0:47:53.527 --> 0:47:55.327
<v Speaker 4>a sneak peek me ya.

0:47:55.527 --> 0:47:58.407
<v Speaker 2>You are our expert spin doctor here. Yeah, our friend

0:47:58.407 --> 0:48:00.447
<v Speaker 2>who were not naming, who is paying all the money

0:48:00.487 --> 0:48:02.607
<v Speaker 2>to the spin doctors because the people keep leaving the

0:48:02.607 --> 0:48:05.607
<v Speaker 2>fuo emojis on his Instagram account? What is he being

0:48:05.647 --> 0:48:06.327
<v Speaker 2>advised to do?

0:48:06.487 --> 0:48:09.087
<v Speaker 1>Right now? I've read that he'd fled and left that she.

0:48:09.567 --> 0:48:12.007
<v Speaker 1>I can't believe that anyone would do that, because obviously

0:48:12.287 --> 0:48:13.887
<v Speaker 1>Gwyneth knew who was sleeping in that bed.

0:48:14.247 --> 0:48:17.927
<v Speaker 2>I can oh, you left also, I would imagine that

0:48:18.047 --> 0:48:20.607
<v Speaker 2>he was probably also thinking, like in that state, in

0:48:20.647 --> 0:48:24.127
<v Speaker 2>that freaked out state, Gwyneth herself is not stripping the bed,

0:48:24.487 --> 0:48:27.527
<v Speaker 2>so he's probably thinking the staff are going to have

0:48:27.607 --> 0:48:30.007
<v Speaker 2>to deal with it. They're probably not going to tell her,

0:48:30.407 --> 0:48:32.767
<v Speaker 2>or maybe he's not thinking straight. He's just in the pattern.

0:48:33.487 --> 0:48:35.767
<v Speaker 2>Thank you, thank you out louders for listening to us

0:48:35.767 --> 0:48:38.687
<v Speaker 2>on this Wednesday episode, and a big thanks to our team.

0:48:38.727 --> 0:48:40.567
<v Speaker 2>Of course, we're putting the show together. We are going

0:48:40.607 --> 0:48:42.487
<v Speaker 2>to be back in your ears tomorrow.

0:48:42.847 --> 0:48:47.447
<v Speaker 1>Bye by shout out to any Muma mia subscribers listening.

0:48:47.607 --> 0:48:49.887
<v Speaker 1>If you love the show and want to support us

0:48:49.927 --> 0:48:52.767
<v Speaker 1>as well, subscribing to MoMA mia is the very best

0:48:52.807 --> 0:48:54.567
<v Speaker 1>way to do so. There is a link in the

0:48:54.607 --> 0:48:55.567
<v Speaker 1>episode description.