1 00:00:08,234 --> 00:00:10,953 Speaker 1: You're listening to I'm ONMA mea podcast. 2 00:00:14,714 --> 00:00:19,114 Speaker 2: Hello out louders, This is a heavy, sad week in Australia. 3 00:00:19,553 --> 00:00:21,834 Speaker 2: Talking to you all in so many different places all 4 00:00:21,874 --> 00:00:23,794 Speaker 2: over the world. As I know lots about loud as 5 00:00:23,794 --> 00:00:26,794 Speaker 2: are is a real profound privilege for us when things 6 00:00:26,834 --> 00:00:29,434 Speaker 2: are dark, and we actually do a lot of talking 7 00:00:29,514 --> 00:00:34,594 Speaker 2: off mic about how best to honor that. Today, Jesse, 8 00:00:34,793 --> 00:00:36,633 Speaker 2: Amelia and I want to talk a bit about how 9 00:00:36,634 --> 00:00:38,394 Speaker 2: it feels to be so close to the center of 10 00:00:38,434 --> 00:00:42,314 Speaker 2: this tragedy, not because it's about us. The real pain 11 00:00:42,354 --> 00:00:45,993 Speaker 2: here belongs to Australia's Jewish community and to everybody affected 12 00:00:46,034 --> 00:00:49,394 Speaker 2: directly by what happened at Bondai Beach on Sunday. But 13 00:00:49,473 --> 00:00:52,074 Speaker 2: we are here and we're close to many people who 14 00:00:52,074 --> 00:00:54,514 Speaker 2: were affected, and we want to talk about some of 15 00:00:54,514 --> 00:00:56,993 Speaker 2: the names we've learned this week that we will never forget. 16 00:00:58,314 --> 00:01:00,074 Speaker 3: And then we're going to move away from. 17 00:00:59,994 --> 00:01:02,673 Speaker 2: That darkness just for a little window of time and 18 00:01:02,714 --> 00:01:06,234 Speaker 2: bring you some other conversations. Being able to do that 19 00:01:06,394 --> 00:01:08,754 Speaker 2: is not something that I know everyone has the ability 20 00:01:08,794 --> 00:01:11,474 Speaker 2: to do today, but we also know it's what some 21 00:01:11,514 --> 00:01:14,994 Speaker 2: of you need. Jesse, you and I both went down 22 00:01:15,034 --> 00:01:16,953 Speaker 2: to Bondai yesterday separately. 23 00:01:17,354 --> 00:01:18,394 Speaker 3: Tell me about why you went. 24 00:01:19,794 --> 00:01:21,714 Speaker 4: Luca and I both sort of looked at each other 25 00:01:21,754 --> 00:01:25,434 Speaker 4: and went, this is something we feel like we need 26 00:01:26,154 --> 00:01:26,514 Speaker 4: to do. 27 00:01:26,794 --> 00:01:30,354 Speaker 5: Luca is Jewish and born and raised Jewish. 28 00:01:30,154 --> 00:01:32,314 Speaker 3: And unborn and raised in these in the. 29 00:01:32,274 --> 00:01:37,634 Speaker 4: As suburbs, exactly right. And so we went to Bondai 30 00:01:38,114 --> 00:01:44,074 Speaker 4: and the first thing that struck me was the the 31 00:01:44,194 --> 00:01:48,034 Speaker 4: eeriness of the silence. One word I would never use 32 00:01:48,114 --> 00:01:52,794 Speaker 4: to describe Bondai is quiet, like from the traffic. There's 33 00:01:53,074 --> 00:01:57,354 Speaker 4: always music blaring, there's people talking. It was just silence. 34 00:01:57,754 --> 00:02:01,114 Speaker 4: You could also tell that everyone was slightly on edge 35 00:02:01,154 --> 00:02:04,874 Speaker 4: because as we were standing there looking at the memorial 36 00:02:04,994 --> 00:02:10,994 Speaker 4: and there are just so many flowers, a phone would 37 00:02:11,034 --> 00:02:13,154 Speaker 4: go off or someone would speak a little loudly, and 38 00:02:13,194 --> 00:02:17,074 Speaker 4: you could tell that that was making some people uncomfortable, 39 00:02:17,074 --> 00:02:20,314 Speaker 4: and no doubt, because we were surrounded by people who 40 00:02:20,314 --> 00:02:24,834 Speaker 4: were actually in Bondai when that happened, and members of 41 00:02:25,274 --> 00:02:28,674 Speaker 4: the Jewish community who are on hire alert right now, 42 00:02:28,754 --> 00:02:34,633 Speaker 4: and looking at the flowers. There were little teddy bears 43 00:02:34,674 --> 00:02:39,954 Speaker 4: from the hospital that I noticed, and messages and it 44 00:02:40,034 --> 00:02:46,914 Speaker 4: was just an incredibly somber atmosphere. What struck me is 45 00:02:46,954 --> 00:02:49,234 Speaker 4: you're sort of walking down there in silence and just 46 00:02:49,354 --> 00:02:53,634 Speaker 4: it's swarms of people with flowers putting them down, and 47 00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:58,514 Speaker 4: you see someone in a school uniform, and someone you know, 48 00:02:58,834 --> 00:03:04,274 Speaker 4: a member of the Jewish community, a Muslim, a surfar 49 00:03:04,914 --> 00:03:09,914 Speaker 4: just the cosmopolitan of all the different people who were 50 00:03:09,954 --> 00:03:13,754 Speaker 4: meeting there, and it was really. 51 00:03:15,474 --> 00:03:16,074 Speaker 5: Affecting. 52 00:03:16,394 --> 00:03:18,874 Speaker 4: But I think a really important thing to go and 53 00:03:19,594 --> 00:03:22,594 Speaker 4: stand there and process it. I have a lot of 54 00:03:22,594 --> 00:03:24,434 Speaker 4: people who BONDI means a lot to them, and they're 55 00:03:24,434 --> 00:03:27,834 Speaker 4: not close to Bondai right now and they wish they were. 56 00:03:27,954 --> 00:03:31,434 Speaker 4: And so to look over and see there's a black 57 00:03:31,514 --> 00:03:34,594 Speaker 4: tarp set up that sort of covers whether now crime 58 00:03:34,634 --> 00:03:40,234 Speaker 4: scene is and you know, the bridge is only meters away, 59 00:03:40,474 --> 00:03:42,274 Speaker 4: and a lot of people are sitting on the grass 60 00:03:42,314 --> 00:03:50,594 Speaker 4: reflecting and you know, talking or remembering certain things that happened. 61 00:03:50,634 --> 00:03:53,474 Speaker 4: I have friends that were I have a friend who 62 00:03:53,554 --> 00:03:56,194 Speaker 4: was in the bathroom in the pavilion when it happened, 63 00:03:56,234 --> 00:04:01,114 Speaker 4: and she's getting her head around it. And yesterday everyone 64 00:04:01,234 --> 00:04:03,634 Speaker 4: Luca and I spoke to from we met up with 65 00:04:03,674 --> 00:04:06,154 Speaker 4: a friend of his and we're talking to someone else 66 00:04:06,194 --> 00:04:08,114 Speaker 4: on the phone and you go, how are you and 67 00:04:08,154 --> 00:04:12,754 Speaker 4: they say, ah, my friend was shot. My colleague was 68 00:04:12,754 --> 00:04:17,154 Speaker 4: a first responder. I have someone who I went to 69 00:04:17,194 --> 00:04:22,274 Speaker 4: school with who is currently in surgery. Like the closeness 70 00:04:22,313 --> 00:04:27,474 Speaker 4: of this and the victims, but also there are a 71 00:04:27,513 --> 00:04:29,954 Speaker 4: lot of people who are injured in hospital, who are shot, 72 00:04:29,953 --> 00:04:32,193 Speaker 4: who are looking at potential amputation, who will looking at 73 00:04:32,193 --> 00:04:37,393 Speaker 4: like just the horrific ongoing effects and the ripple impact 74 00:04:37,393 --> 00:04:41,394 Speaker 4: on the community is just can't be overstated. 75 00:04:42,073 --> 00:04:42,794 Speaker 3: Absolutely. 76 00:04:43,193 --> 00:04:46,993 Speaker 2: I went down there because I don't live in Sydney anymore, 77 00:04:46,993 --> 00:04:48,873 Speaker 2: as many out loud as well know, but for twenty 78 00:04:48,914 --> 00:04:51,914 Speaker 2: five years I lived in these suburbs. I lived in 79 00:04:51,953 --> 00:04:54,993 Speaker 2: could you, which is a few beaches over. And as 80 00:04:55,034 --> 00:04:58,354 Speaker 2: to your point about a lot of people who that 81 00:04:58,433 --> 00:05:00,274 Speaker 2: place means a lot to them, but they're not around, 82 00:05:01,113 --> 00:05:04,433 Speaker 2: that was very much. I felt very I went and 83 00:05:04,474 --> 00:05:07,913 Speaker 2: I put my flowers down there, and there were people everywhere, 84 00:05:07,914 --> 00:05:09,873 Speaker 2: and there were a lot of members of the Jewish 85 00:05:09,873 --> 00:05:12,234 Speaker 2: community who were over near the memorial who were offering 86 00:05:12,274 --> 00:05:15,833 Speaker 2: to pray, with people who are giving food out, who 87 00:05:15,873 --> 00:05:19,513 Speaker 2: were talking and gathering and being together, which you know, 88 00:05:19,914 --> 00:05:24,433 Speaker 2: it was so important. I went and sat because I 89 00:05:24,433 --> 00:05:27,113 Speaker 2: don't know, I was very profoundly moved, obviously by everything 90 00:05:27,113 --> 00:05:31,313 Speaker 2: that's happening, but this city means an enormous amount to me, 91 00:05:31,914 --> 00:05:35,193 Speaker 2: and you know, it's Australia opened its arms to me. 92 00:05:35,433 --> 00:05:38,113 Speaker 2: I'm an immigrant who's lived here for decades now, but 93 00:05:38,914 --> 00:05:41,993 Speaker 2: it's profoundly a part of me. And it made me 94 00:05:42,034 --> 00:05:44,394 Speaker 2: really think about that yesterday when I was sitting there 95 00:05:44,594 --> 00:05:47,033 Speaker 2: and I know, I've got Australian friends who live in 96 00:05:47,034 --> 00:05:51,753 Speaker 2: London and they're all thinking about Bondai, and I was 97 00:05:51,834 --> 00:05:53,714 Speaker 2: just sort of thinking about. 98 00:05:55,433 --> 00:05:56,473 Speaker 3: Just our beautiful city. 99 00:05:56,633 --> 00:05:58,433 Speaker 2: And you know, we talked about this on Monday, if 100 00:05:58,433 --> 00:06:01,433 Speaker 2: you haven't listened to the episode we made with me 101 00:06:01,513 --> 00:06:04,513 Speaker 2: other three of us and mea Friedman. On Monday, we 102 00:06:04,594 --> 00:06:07,594 Speaker 2: did talk about how it sounds almost try and cliche 103 00:06:07,633 --> 00:06:10,514 Speaker 2: to go this sort of thing doesn't happen here, And 104 00:06:09,753 --> 00:06:12,833 Speaker 2: I don't mean that, but I just think that when 105 00:06:12,953 --> 00:06:16,833 Speaker 2: something so horrific unfolds it somewhere that you know so well, 106 00:06:17,594 --> 00:06:18,633 Speaker 2: whether you're still. 107 00:06:18,393 --> 00:06:18,954 Speaker 3: There or not. 108 00:06:19,313 --> 00:06:23,794 Speaker 2: It made me feel very protective of this special place. 109 00:06:25,034 --> 00:06:27,914 Speaker 1: Anyway, what you said about the beach being quiet was 110 00:06:27,953 --> 00:06:31,914 Speaker 1: so interesting because it made me realize I live on 111 00:06:31,953 --> 00:06:34,193 Speaker 1: a beach far from One day on the other side 112 00:06:34,234 --> 00:06:36,633 Speaker 1: of the city, and I have never seen the beach 113 00:06:36,674 --> 00:06:39,394 Speaker 1: so quiet as in the last couple of days. I 114 00:06:39,433 --> 00:06:45,153 Speaker 1: think people are feeling that they don't even want to 115 00:06:45,193 --> 00:06:48,394 Speaker 1: go to the beach right now, because. 116 00:06:48,914 --> 00:06:52,794 Speaker 4: It's almost what happened is the antithesis of the beach, 117 00:06:52,834 --> 00:06:55,474 Speaker 4: which is that you go there too because you feel 118 00:06:56,073 --> 00:06:58,553 Speaker 4: care free and relaxed. And it's almost like the weather 119 00:06:58,714 --> 00:07:01,474 Speaker 4: over the last few days have reflected back a city 120 00:07:01,513 --> 00:07:05,433 Speaker 4: that is melancholy and dark and windy and stormy. 121 00:07:05,193 --> 00:07:12,594 Speaker 5: Like to go in and there there is nothing that says. 122 00:07:13,714 --> 00:07:16,794 Speaker 4: There is nothing festive about this time of year, and 123 00:07:18,434 --> 00:07:23,674 Speaker 4: that gathering of people and to hear a lot of 124 00:07:23,714 --> 00:07:28,994 Speaker 4: the Jewish community are saying prayers and singing songs and 125 00:07:29,034 --> 00:07:31,153 Speaker 4: there was something so a motive about that that it's like, 126 00:07:31,194 --> 00:07:33,874 Speaker 4: these are prayers that have you know, I've sat in 127 00:07:33,914 --> 00:07:36,914 Speaker 4: my in law's house and said it over Shabbat dinner, 128 00:07:37,034 --> 00:07:41,153 Speaker 4: or at my wedding. We had a blessing in the 129 00:07:41,234 --> 00:07:47,194 Speaker 4: days before with a rabbi, and you know, people from 130 00:07:47,234 --> 00:07:50,554 Speaker 4: the synagogue and to hear like these moments of my 131 00:07:50,594 --> 00:07:53,954 Speaker 4: life that have been so critical and I've felt I've 132 00:07:53,994 --> 00:07:57,273 Speaker 4: felt so welcomed to then hear that in a totally 133 00:07:57,274 --> 00:08:02,393 Speaker 4: different tone, and to also go, there's bravery and showing 134 00:08:02,474 --> 00:08:09,634 Speaker 4: up to Bondi and displaying and expressing your judaism today. 135 00:08:09,714 --> 00:08:11,593 Speaker 5: And I just had so much respect for. 136 00:08:13,074 --> 00:08:16,194 Speaker 2: The people around me so much, And you know, there 137 00:08:16,234 --> 00:08:18,554 Speaker 2: were signs of there were people in the bars, there 138 00:08:18,554 --> 00:08:21,234 Speaker 2: were people, and I kind of I also thought that 139 00:08:21,354 --> 00:08:25,434 Speaker 2: was really good, Like it's, yeah, I mean, everybody's so 140 00:08:25,594 --> 00:08:29,234 Speaker 2: lost if you're not directly affected and so but everybody's 141 00:08:29,274 --> 00:08:32,754 Speaker 2: so lost of how best to express their shock. But 142 00:08:33,034 --> 00:08:36,834 Speaker 2: also people are resilient and that it is. It's this 143 00:08:36,953 --> 00:08:40,794 Speaker 2: strange mix. But one of the things that I felt 144 00:08:40,834 --> 00:08:42,314 Speaker 2: very much there is I walked across the bridge that 145 00:08:42,354 --> 00:08:44,914 Speaker 2: I've walked across a thousand times but now is so 146 00:08:45,314 --> 00:08:49,314 Speaker 2: iconic from all the footage right and I've seen from 147 00:08:49,354 --> 00:08:52,554 Speaker 2: the videos that we've been consuming over the past few days, 148 00:08:53,474 --> 00:08:55,634 Speaker 2: I've seen some of the most awful and some of 149 00:08:55,634 --> 00:08:58,914 Speaker 2: the bravest, bravest things I've ever seen unfold so close 150 00:08:58,994 --> 00:09:03,194 Speaker 2: to that bridge. And I was thinking about that when 151 00:09:03,194 --> 00:09:07,594 Speaker 2: I was there, because on Monday's show, we obviously talked 152 00:09:07,714 --> 00:09:11,514 Speaker 2: about Ahmed El Ahmed, who is the hero who has 153 00:09:11,554 --> 00:09:14,554 Speaker 2: gone around the world. He is still in hospital recovering 154 00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:17,514 Speaker 2: from another surgery on his shoulder after being shot. But 155 00:09:17,634 --> 00:09:19,714 Speaker 2: also what we've found out in the past couple of 156 00:09:19,794 --> 00:09:22,474 Speaker 2: days is that there were many other heroes. I mean, 157 00:09:22,514 --> 00:09:25,034 Speaker 2: we talked about this on Monday, that the fact that 158 00:09:25,114 --> 00:09:29,554 Speaker 2: really Ahmed's bravery shone a light on how many people 159 00:09:29,594 --> 00:09:32,754 Speaker 2: did incredible things on that day, but not all of 160 00:09:32,794 --> 00:09:38,194 Speaker 2: them tragically made it. The couple yesterday that film of 161 00:09:38,274 --> 00:09:44,314 Speaker 2: them was widely circulating are called Boris and Sophia German, 162 00:09:44,394 --> 00:09:46,554 Speaker 2: and they're a couple in their sixties and they were 163 00:09:46,594 --> 00:09:50,034 Speaker 2: literally just walking down the street and they saw the gunman, 164 00:09:50,154 --> 00:09:53,674 Speaker 2: the older gunman get out of the car with the rifle, 165 00:09:54,354 --> 00:09:58,994 Speaker 2: and Boris tackled him, just straight out tackled him and 166 00:09:59,114 --> 00:10:00,874 Speaker 2: managed to get the gun from him. Was not to 167 00:10:00,914 --> 00:10:04,714 Speaker 2: the ground. Sophia ran to him. They're a couple who've 168 00:10:04,754 --> 00:10:10,034 Speaker 2: been married for thirty four years. He's a retired mechanic, 169 00:10:10,114 --> 00:10:14,474 Speaker 2: she works at Australia Post. Unfortunately, the gunman, as we 170 00:10:14,834 --> 00:10:18,794 Speaker 2: have learned, had many more than one firearm and he 171 00:10:19,154 --> 00:10:20,394 Speaker 2: reached for another gun and they. 172 00:10:20,314 --> 00:10:22,794 Speaker 3: Were both shot and died. 173 00:10:23,394 --> 00:10:27,794 Speaker 2: It's unthinkable, but their family overlease statements said that they 174 00:10:28,754 --> 00:10:30,794 Speaker 2: got some piece from knowing that they died in each 175 00:10:30,834 --> 00:10:35,114 Speaker 2: other's arms and also while committing such an extraordinary bravery. 176 00:10:35,794 --> 00:10:40,034 Speaker 2: Also Reuven Morrison, who's sixty one years old and he's 177 00:10:40,074 --> 00:10:42,874 Speaker 2: identified as the other man in that now very famous 178 00:10:42,914 --> 00:10:47,754 Speaker 2: video where Ahmed is wrestling the gun from the gunman 179 00:10:48,114 --> 00:10:50,154 Speaker 2: and he comes up behind him and he throws a brick, 180 00:10:51,034 --> 00:10:54,314 Speaker 2: and he again is a person who's running towards danger 181 00:10:54,354 --> 00:10:57,514 Speaker 2: and he was shot and tragically is one of the lost. Also, 182 00:10:57,674 --> 00:11:02,674 Speaker 2: I think that these stories of bravery are so important 183 00:11:03,954 --> 00:11:06,994 Speaker 2: because I think that as we're talking about this con 184 00:11:07,234 --> 00:11:13,234 Speaker 2: using time, the worst and the best are all there 185 00:11:13,234 --> 00:11:13,714 Speaker 2: for us. 186 00:11:13,594 --> 00:11:17,114 Speaker 4: And there wasn't There wasn't one here, there were countless. 187 00:11:17,634 --> 00:11:21,674 Speaker 1: I heard a story that so deeply moved me. I'm 188 00:11:21,674 --> 00:11:25,154 Speaker 1: going to try and get through this without crying. Her 189 00:11:25,234 --> 00:11:28,594 Speaker 1: name is Jessica Rosen, and we need to know her name. 190 00:11:28,914 --> 00:11:33,114 Speaker 1: Jessica Rosen went with her family to Hannaka by the 191 00:11:33,154 --> 00:11:37,594 Speaker 1: Sea and when gunshots rang out, her husband was running 192 00:11:37,634 --> 00:11:39,514 Speaker 1: away with their toddler, who was one and a half, 193 00:11:40,314 --> 00:11:43,394 Speaker 1: and she was searching for her three year old son. 194 00:11:43,634 --> 00:11:47,834 Speaker 1: Can you imagine in that moment you hear gunshots. You 195 00:11:47,954 --> 00:11:50,194 Speaker 1: know where your toddler is, but you don't know where 196 00:11:50,194 --> 00:11:52,274 Speaker 1: your three year old is. And she's looking for a 197 00:11:52,354 --> 00:11:56,674 Speaker 1: three year old and she notices a little girl screaming 198 00:11:57,234 --> 00:12:01,234 Speaker 1: who happens to be three. Her name is Gigi, And 199 00:12:01,674 --> 00:12:04,794 Speaker 1: in that moment, she decided to lay on top of 200 00:12:04,834 --> 00:12:08,274 Speaker 1: this little girl for the entire time until the shooting 201 00:12:08,314 --> 00:12:11,954 Speaker 1: stopped and the girl's dad came to pick up Chigi. 202 00:12:13,194 --> 00:12:15,314 Speaker 1: Keep in mind that she still doesn't know where her 203 00:12:15,314 --> 00:12:17,394 Speaker 1: own three year old is when she is doing this, 204 00:12:17,674 --> 00:12:22,714 Speaker 1: And there is a video of her lying on top 205 00:12:22,754 --> 00:12:26,074 Speaker 1: of this girl. The gunman is in the background, and 206 00:12:26,354 --> 00:12:30,953 Speaker 1: there is audio. The audio in this video is her 207 00:12:31,034 --> 00:12:34,834 Speaker 1: repeating I got you, I got you while she's lying 208 00:12:34,834 --> 00:12:35,794 Speaker 1: on top of this girl. 209 00:12:38,514 --> 00:12:39,154 Speaker 3: I just think. 210 00:12:39,194 --> 00:12:41,434 Speaker 1: And she says, we're going to be nice and safe 211 00:12:41,474 --> 00:12:44,194 Speaker 1: and nobody is going to hurt us, okay. And she 212 00:12:44,514 --> 00:12:49,714 Speaker 1: sounds as calm as if she's saying can you brush 213 00:12:49,754 --> 00:12:52,354 Speaker 1: your teeth, or as calm as it's time for dinner. 214 00:12:53,234 --> 00:12:57,914 Speaker 1: And I just can't believe what it took for her 215 00:12:57,954 --> 00:13:01,994 Speaker 1: to speak to this girl that she's never met before 216 00:13:02,674 --> 00:13:05,394 Speaker 1: in that tone of voice, while not knowing what her 217 00:13:05,434 --> 00:13:07,514 Speaker 1: own three year old is She wrote about it on 218 00:13:07,594 --> 00:13:13,314 Speaker 1: LinkedIn afterwards, and she is fine. She says she has 219 00:13:13,394 --> 00:13:17,154 Speaker 1: some bruises, but she's otherwise fine. Gigi is fine. Her 220 00:13:17,274 --> 00:13:18,554 Speaker 1: own three year old is fine. 221 00:13:19,034 --> 00:13:21,554 Speaker 2: The bravery of so many adults who are there, who 222 00:13:21,714 --> 00:13:25,474 Speaker 2: literally threw their bodies on top of children was just 223 00:13:25,634 --> 00:13:29,114 Speaker 2: absolutely extraordinary. We do, of course, have to mention one 224 00:13:29,114 --> 00:13:31,754 Speaker 2: more name that I don't think anyone in Australia will forget, 225 00:13:32,034 --> 00:13:34,754 Speaker 2: which is that of Matilda, who is the ten year old. 226 00:13:37,474 --> 00:13:42,154 Speaker 4: I don't think that Australia will ever get Matilda's face 227 00:13:42,354 --> 00:13:44,953 Speaker 4: out of our minds. She is just the most beautiful 228 00:13:44,994 --> 00:13:45,954 Speaker 4: little face. 229 00:13:46,074 --> 00:13:49,874 Speaker 2: Ten years old. And her parents spoke yesterday. They're not 230 00:13:49,914 --> 00:13:54,634 Speaker 2: disclosing their surname, and they said that Matilda was called 231 00:13:54,634 --> 00:13:58,234 Speaker 2: Matilda because the family came from Ukraine and she was 232 00:13:58,274 --> 00:14:00,834 Speaker 2: their first Aussie, their first Australia child. 233 00:14:00,874 --> 00:14:01,594 Speaker 3: She loved bees. 234 00:14:01,874 --> 00:14:04,194 Speaker 2: Bee was her middle name, her nickname, So they want 235 00:14:04,194 --> 00:14:05,994 Speaker 2: people to share bees to remember Matilda. 236 00:14:06,074 --> 00:14:10,354 Speaker 3: I am I just yeah, there are so many of these. 237 00:14:10,394 --> 00:14:12,954 Speaker 2: Of course, the people we've talked about today are not 238 00:14:13,034 --> 00:14:13,634 Speaker 2: the end of it. 239 00:14:13,834 --> 00:14:18,034 Speaker 1: Let me mention one more. There's a photo someone captured 240 00:14:18,154 --> 00:14:23,434 Speaker 1: of Jackson Dolan, who is a lifesaver who was photographed 241 00:14:23,514 --> 00:14:27,594 Speaker 1: running barefoot with a medical bag down Bondei Road from Tamarama, 242 00:14:28,074 --> 00:14:33,834 Speaker 1: running towards danger. That image just captures the bravery of 243 00:14:33,954 --> 00:14:35,394 Speaker 1: so many people. 244 00:14:35,354 --> 00:14:38,434 Speaker 4: And that those lifeguards, many of them were first responders 245 00:14:38,434 --> 00:14:40,834 Speaker 4: on the scene. That is not what they are trained for, 246 00:14:41,194 --> 00:14:43,994 Speaker 4: that is not what they were expecting to see on 247 00:14:44,074 --> 00:14:49,154 Speaker 4: that on that day, there's a man who is not 248 00:14:49,194 --> 00:14:52,274 Speaker 4: sharing his name. He spoke to the I read about 249 00:14:52,274 --> 00:14:57,114 Speaker 4: it in the AFR and he's going by ab because 250 00:14:57,194 --> 00:15:00,434 Speaker 4: he is a refugee who came to Australia and doesn't 251 00:15:00,434 --> 00:15:03,474 Speaker 4: have a permanent visa And in fact, he spent the 252 00:15:03,594 --> 00:15:07,274 Speaker 4: night before in custody. 253 00:15:07,394 --> 00:15:10,314 Speaker 5: He has had criminal charges, he is awaiting a. 254 00:15:10,314 --> 00:15:15,754 Speaker 4: Court date and on Sunday he found himself in Bondaie 255 00:15:15,834 --> 00:15:18,754 Speaker 4: and there he has appeared in footage. And for a 256 00:15:18,754 --> 00:15:20,594 Speaker 4: while people didn't know what he was doing. They were 257 00:15:20,714 --> 00:15:23,994 Speaker 4: very confused by his actions. But what they've now pieced 258 00:15:23,994 --> 00:15:27,234 Speaker 4: together is that he got out of this suber or 259 00:15:27,234 --> 00:15:31,874 Speaker 4: this taxi and walked over and hid and was watching 260 00:15:31,914 --> 00:15:36,634 Speaker 4: what was going on and eventually did spring up onto 261 00:15:36,674 --> 00:15:41,634 Speaker 4: the bridge. And you know, one of the gunmen was 262 00:15:41,714 --> 00:15:43,674 Speaker 4: dead at that point, the other was injured, and he 263 00:15:43,794 --> 00:15:45,914 Speaker 4: just wanted to kick the gun away so that he 264 00:15:45,994 --> 00:15:48,914 Speaker 4: couldn't access it anymore. And then he kind of flings 265 00:15:48,954 --> 00:15:52,994 Speaker 4: his arms up to go, I'm not And he has 266 00:15:53,954 --> 00:15:58,514 Speaker 4: children of his own, he has a family and was. 267 00:15:58,634 --> 00:16:00,834 Speaker 5: Very aware the danger that he was putting himself in. 268 00:16:00,874 --> 00:16:01,274 Speaker 1: And it was. 269 00:16:01,274 --> 00:16:06,234 Speaker 4: Another police officer who was not in uniform who yelled out, 270 00:16:06,514 --> 00:16:08,874 Speaker 4: he's not with them, He's not with them. And the 271 00:16:08,994 --> 00:16:12,954 Speaker 4: fact that you know that man, this flawed hero is 272 00:16:12,994 --> 00:16:17,754 Speaker 4: they're calling him. He's not perfect, but he knew what 273 00:16:18,074 --> 00:16:23,874 Speaker 4: was needed of him in that moment and was so brave. 274 00:16:23,914 --> 00:16:25,914 Speaker 4: In fact, people came up and started kicking him because 275 00:16:25,914 --> 00:16:27,954 Speaker 4: they thought that he was part of it and he 276 00:16:27,994 --> 00:16:30,554 Speaker 4: was just saying no, no, no, I was trying to 277 00:16:30,594 --> 00:16:31,234 Speaker 4: do the right thing. 278 00:16:31,434 --> 00:16:36,514 Speaker 2: So so the whole sort of good is like, I 279 00:16:36,514 --> 00:16:41,954 Speaker 2: don't know, as you say, flawed here, but unlikely elderly gentleman, 280 00:16:43,034 --> 00:16:47,234 Speaker 2: terrified mothers, you know, like bronze lifeguards. 281 00:16:47,274 --> 00:16:50,794 Speaker 1: Like it's just well, it's kind of a microcosm of 282 00:16:50,834 --> 00:16:55,754 Speaker 1: Australia here and it's a migrant country and it's full 283 00:16:55,754 --> 00:17:00,914 Speaker 1: of people from different backgrounds who all had an expectation 284 00:17:01,154 --> 00:17:05,234 Speaker 1: that they could enjoy the evening at the beach. And 285 00:17:05,273 --> 00:17:08,273 Speaker 1: what strikes me about all of this is that video 286 00:17:08,394 --> 00:17:13,994 Speaker 1: means that we have this unprecedented access to the atrocity 287 00:17:14,194 --> 00:17:17,034 Speaker 1: and the horror of what happened on Sunday, but we 288 00:17:17,074 --> 00:17:20,954 Speaker 1: also know so much more about We've also seen so 289 00:17:21,154 --> 00:17:26,874 Speaker 1: much of humanity at its very best alongside humanity at 290 00:17:26,874 --> 00:17:31,074 Speaker 1: its very worst through all this video footage and documentary 291 00:17:31,074 --> 00:17:35,074 Speaker 1: footage of what happened. I feel like it's important to 292 00:17:35,114 --> 00:17:40,394 Speaker 1: say that there are many people today who can't turn 293 00:17:40,434 --> 00:17:43,634 Speaker 1: away from this because they're directly affected by it. But 294 00:17:43,794 --> 00:17:48,714 Speaker 1: for people who were not directly affected, experts do say 295 00:17:48,714 --> 00:17:52,594 Speaker 1: it's important to protect yourself and to not consume too 296 00:17:52,674 --> 00:17:56,434 Speaker 1: much information or footage. Get the facts by all means, 297 00:17:56,594 --> 00:18:00,714 Speaker 1: understand what happened, bear witness to what happened, but at 298 00:18:00,714 --> 00:18:04,394 Speaker 1: some point you need to protect yourself as well and 299 00:18:04,474 --> 00:18:09,154 Speaker 1: your own mental health in this situation. So it's in 300 00:18:09,154 --> 00:18:11,914 Speaker 1: that spirit that we decided that for the show today, 301 00:18:11,914 --> 00:18:14,314 Speaker 1: we did want to talk about some other things too, 302 00:18:15,394 --> 00:18:17,434 Speaker 1: so we'll be back in a moment. 303 00:18:33,394 --> 00:18:36,513 Speaker 4: There are two celebrities that are dominating the news cycle 304 00:18:36,594 --> 00:18:37,034 Speaker 4: this week. 305 00:18:37,954 --> 00:18:39,434 Speaker 5: Taylor Swift has a documentary. 306 00:18:39,474 --> 00:18:42,594 Speaker 4: We are going to get to that, and Timothy Challa 307 00:18:42,674 --> 00:18:47,234 Speaker 4: May is being interviewed and snippets of it are going viral. 308 00:18:47,674 --> 00:18:50,274 Speaker 6: Sometimes you get to call things as it is, as 309 00:18:50,274 --> 00:18:53,674 Speaker 6: they are and not tiptoe, especially as you get older. 310 00:18:53,674 --> 00:18:55,634 Speaker 6: I'm glad to be thirty. I want to look back 311 00:18:55,674 --> 00:19:02,394 Speaker 6: on my interviews when I'm fried and mentally anguished in 312 00:19:02,434 --> 00:19:04,474 Speaker 6: my sixties and look back at my interviews and ely 313 00:19:04,514 --> 00:19:06,474 Speaker 6: taking Oh man, I was really speaking the truth and 314 00:19:06,514 --> 00:19:10,273 Speaker 6: not afraid of the team, like this is probably my 315 00:19:10,314 --> 00:19:13,513 Speaker 6: best performance, you know, and that it's been like seven 316 00:19:13,554 --> 00:19:16,354 Speaker 6: eight years that I feel like I've been handing in 317 00:19:16,994 --> 00:19:21,834 Speaker 6: really really committed, top of the line performances. And it's 318 00:19:21,834 --> 00:19:24,434 Speaker 6: important to say it out loud because the discipline and 319 00:19:24,514 --> 00:19:27,874 Speaker 6: the work ethic I'm bringing these things I don't want 320 00:19:27,914 --> 00:19:29,234 Speaker 6: people to take for granted. I don't want to take 321 00:19:29,234 --> 00:19:32,954 Speaker 6: for granted this is really some top level shit. 322 00:19:34,074 --> 00:19:37,194 Speaker 3: Do you think he's taking the piss Okay? 323 00:19:38,194 --> 00:19:38,554 Speaker 1: I do. 324 00:19:38,674 --> 00:19:41,114 Speaker 4: That is part of my theory is that I think, 325 00:19:41,194 --> 00:19:43,754 Speaker 4: like everyone else, want a press tour in twenty twenty five, 326 00:19:43,914 --> 00:19:46,874 Speaker 4: I think that man is in character because Marty Supreme 327 00:19:47,674 --> 00:19:49,874 Speaker 4: and will no more when we see the film. But basically, 328 00:19:49,914 --> 00:19:52,914 Speaker 4: he was this table tennis player who his ego and 329 00:19:52,954 --> 00:19:54,513 Speaker 4: the fact he thought he was the best in the 330 00:19:54,554 --> 00:19:58,273 Speaker 4: world was part was part of his appeal. And so 331 00:19:58,994 --> 00:20:02,754 Speaker 4: there's this theory that is he just playing that. 332 00:20:03,274 --> 00:20:06,034 Speaker 2: He has of course, I mean famously last year when 333 00:20:06,074 --> 00:20:09,834 Speaker 2: he was angling for an oscar for the Dylan movie 334 00:20:09,874 --> 00:20:13,514 Speaker 2: Complete Unknown's Thank You Amelia, I'd forgotten its name. He 335 00:20:13,594 --> 00:20:16,114 Speaker 2: also made it very clear I think we talked about 336 00:20:16,114 --> 00:20:18,434 Speaker 2: it on the show, that he wanted that oscar, that 337 00:20:18,474 --> 00:20:20,194 Speaker 2: he thought he deserved it, that he wanted to be 338 00:20:20,194 --> 00:20:21,874 Speaker 2: one of the greats. So I think he is a 339 00:20:21,874 --> 00:20:25,834 Speaker 2: little bit in character. But I also think the self belief. 340 00:20:25,514 --> 00:20:29,394 Speaker 4: Part is maybe because he said during that because he 341 00:20:29,434 --> 00:20:31,914 Speaker 4: won in February the Best Actor at the Screen Actors 342 00:20:32,154 --> 00:20:34,954 Speaker 4: Guild Awards, and he said, I know, the classiest thing 343 00:20:34,994 --> 00:20:37,314 Speaker 4: would be to downplay the effort that went into this role. 344 00:20:37,354 --> 00:20:39,234 Speaker 4: But the truth is this was five and a half 345 00:20:39,314 --> 00:20:42,154 Speaker 4: years of my life. The truth is I'm really in 346 00:20:42,234 --> 00:20:44,914 Speaker 4: pursuit of greatness. I know that people don't usually talk 347 00:20:44,994 --> 00:20:46,553 Speaker 4: like that, but I want to be one of the greats. 348 00:20:46,594 --> 00:20:49,313 Speaker 4: I'm inspired by the greats. The difference here is that 349 00:20:49,354 --> 00:20:53,034 Speaker 4: it's talking about his ambition, it's not talking about the 350 00:20:53,514 --> 00:20:56,194 Speaker 4: outcome of the performance, whereas now even the way he's 351 00:20:56,274 --> 00:20:57,354 Speaker 4: dressed his demeanor. 352 00:20:57,634 --> 00:21:00,514 Speaker 1: And it's also interesting that when he wanted the Oscar 353 00:21:00,594 --> 00:21:05,513 Speaker 1: for playing Bob Dylan, a famously eccentric, reclusive artiste, he 354 00:21:05,674 --> 00:21:08,793 Speaker 1: was not photographed on the red carpet in Orange Pleasure 355 00:21:08,954 --> 00:21:12,314 Speaker 1: with his godsfriend Kylie Jenner. Exactly when he is trying 356 00:21:12,354 --> 00:21:15,914 Speaker 1: to present himself as a very sort of cocky on 357 00:21:16,034 --> 00:21:20,074 Speaker 1: top of the world table tennis yes player, famously extroverted, 358 00:21:20,914 --> 00:21:21,793 Speaker 1: he does do that. 359 00:21:22,194 --> 00:21:26,434 Speaker 4: And the response to this press tour has been some 360 00:21:26,474 --> 00:21:29,794 Speaker 4: people calling him a try hard There have been those 361 00:21:29,834 --> 00:21:31,194 Speaker 4: who are just paved away. 362 00:21:31,514 --> 00:21:32,954 Speaker 1: He says, I know I tried. 363 00:21:33,034 --> 00:21:34,434 Speaker 5: I know, I tried really really hard. 364 00:21:34,794 --> 00:21:39,754 Speaker 4: Blown away by his confidence, and my first reaction was 365 00:21:40,634 --> 00:21:42,514 Speaker 4: a woman could never sit there. 366 00:21:42,554 --> 00:21:44,793 Speaker 5: And whether in character or not, there's a great. 367 00:21:44,554 --> 00:21:49,074 Speaker 4: Clip going around of Kristen Stewart saying, and a few 368 00:21:49,114 --> 00:21:52,793 Speaker 4: female actors have made this point that when it comes 369 00:21:52,834 --> 00:21:56,714 Speaker 4: to method, when it comes to staying in character or 370 00:21:56,794 --> 00:21:59,834 Speaker 4: like going home and still speaking in the accent, women 371 00:22:00,154 --> 00:22:02,394 Speaker 4: don't have that luxury. You would just look like an 372 00:22:02,434 --> 00:22:06,754 Speaker 4: ut wanker. But Holly, you've been taking one for the 373 00:22:06,794 --> 00:22:08,994 Speaker 4: team and watching the ear Is documentary. 374 00:22:09,394 --> 00:22:10,714 Speaker 3: It wasn't a punishment. 375 00:22:10,874 --> 00:22:13,594 Speaker 4: And what have you noticed about the tone of Taylor 376 00:22:13,634 --> 00:22:15,674 Speaker 4: Swift's behind the scenes project. 377 00:22:15,794 --> 00:22:18,313 Speaker 2: Well, here's the thing, because you know, I would like 378 00:22:18,354 --> 00:22:20,634 Speaker 2: to lean into your theory, you know I would, my 379 00:22:20,674 --> 00:22:22,914 Speaker 2: feminist heart would like to lean into your theory that 380 00:22:22,954 --> 00:22:26,274 Speaker 2: a woman could never But I watched the first two 381 00:22:26,274 --> 00:22:29,273 Speaker 2: episodes of the Era's documentary. I thoroughly enjoyed it, and 382 00:22:29,354 --> 00:22:33,074 Speaker 2: I actually recommend it if everybody needs a feel good distraction. 383 00:22:34,314 --> 00:22:36,634 Speaker 2: There are two episodes that are already dropped. I believe 384 00:22:36,634 --> 00:22:38,634 Speaker 2: there are two more coming, and then another two after that. 385 00:22:38,714 --> 00:22:40,114 Speaker 2: She's strip feeding in Taylor. 386 00:22:40,234 --> 00:22:42,114 Speaker 4: I will absolutely be watching that over the brain. 387 00:22:42,194 --> 00:22:43,714 Speaker 2: It made me wish I'd gone to the tour, No, 388 00:22:43,954 --> 00:22:45,874 Speaker 2: because I didn't, but I don't think any of us did. 389 00:22:45,874 --> 00:22:47,434 Speaker 3: Well, we're all faubo queens here. 390 00:22:47,834 --> 00:22:50,394 Speaker 2: But the thing that's very striking about it is so 391 00:22:50,434 --> 00:22:53,794 Speaker 2: it's very high production values. They followed her for most 392 00:22:53,794 --> 00:22:58,434 Speaker 2: of the second leg of the tour. It is behind 393 00:22:58,434 --> 00:23:00,234 Speaker 2: the scenes, so there's lots of stuff about how it 394 00:23:00,274 --> 00:23:04,234 Speaker 2: all came to be, which is fascinating. It actually opens 395 00:23:04,554 --> 00:23:08,074 Speaker 2: just as her show in Vienna is called off due 396 00:23:08,114 --> 00:23:11,513 Speaker 2: to a terrorist threat, and there's a lot there about 397 00:23:11,554 --> 00:23:13,594 Speaker 2: that and about the fear around that, which is really 398 00:23:13,594 --> 00:23:17,234 Speaker 2: interesting too. But there is no way to watch these 399 00:23:17,274 --> 00:23:23,354 Speaker 2: two episodes without thinking that Taylor Swift is absolutely amazing, 400 00:23:23,594 --> 00:23:27,194 Speaker 2: like next level amazing. She basically runs a small nation. 401 00:23:27,394 --> 00:23:28,874 Speaker 2: That is the impression you get. 402 00:23:29,194 --> 00:23:31,714 Speaker 5: Does she tell you that or does are we shown? 403 00:23:31,754 --> 00:23:31,994 Speaker 1: Now? Well? 404 00:23:32,034 --> 00:23:34,234 Speaker 2: Then this is the thing that I find really interesting 405 00:23:34,434 --> 00:23:37,474 Speaker 2: is so I'm watching it and I'm going, oh my god, 406 00:23:37,554 --> 00:23:38,674 Speaker 2: how amazing is Taylor Swift. 407 00:23:38,714 --> 00:23:40,114 Speaker 3: I mean, I know she's amazing. 408 00:23:39,794 --> 00:23:41,954 Speaker 2: But look at all the people she employs. Look at 409 00:23:41,954 --> 00:23:44,073 Speaker 2: how she treats them, look at all these amazed Look 410 00:23:44,114 --> 00:23:46,194 Speaker 2: at what she's done for the world, bringing together all 411 00:23:46,194 --> 00:23:46,754 Speaker 2: these kids. 412 00:23:46,834 --> 00:23:47,593 Speaker 3: Da da da da da. 413 00:23:47,594 --> 00:23:49,314 Speaker 2: Look at the commitment, look at the hard work, look 414 00:23:49,354 --> 00:23:51,394 Speaker 2: at the training, look at that. And then you're like, wow, 415 00:23:51,954 --> 00:23:54,073 Speaker 2: I didn't know that we were allowed to make a 416 00:23:54,114 --> 00:23:57,154 Speaker 2: six part documentary series about how amazing we are? Like 417 00:23:57,234 --> 00:24:00,194 Speaker 2: that was my uncharitable thought. But I'm calling myself out 418 00:24:00,194 --> 00:24:03,714 Speaker 2: for it. Yeah, I think there's a bit of and 419 00:24:03,754 --> 00:24:06,034 Speaker 2: maybe it's gen x. Your my millennial friends. I would 420 00:24:06,074 --> 00:24:08,033 Speaker 2: like you to tell me maybe it's gen x that 421 00:24:08,394 --> 00:24:12,074 Speaker 2: I find that. I just that that it's like, oh, 422 00:24:12,114 --> 00:24:15,874 Speaker 2: but you're like boasting your big upping yourself, you're something, 423 00:24:16,794 --> 00:24:20,354 Speaker 2: and I think that maybe it is okay, and maybe 424 00:24:20,394 --> 00:24:20,914 Speaker 2: that's great. 425 00:24:20,914 --> 00:24:21,594 Speaker 3: What do you think? 426 00:24:21,674 --> 00:24:23,954 Speaker 1: Well, I want to know about a particular scene in 427 00:24:24,114 --> 00:24:26,834 Speaker 1: that I've heard about, which is so apparently she gave 428 00:24:26,874 --> 00:24:30,634 Speaker 1: her about one hundred and fifty million dollars US dollars 429 00:24:30,674 --> 00:24:34,474 Speaker 1: of bonuses associated with the Ears tour or thereabouts, and 430 00:24:34,474 --> 00:24:37,834 Speaker 1: apparently there's a scene in it where she is handing 431 00:24:37,834 --> 00:24:40,914 Speaker 1: out the money and how does that come off? Because 432 00:24:41,154 --> 00:24:43,194 Speaker 1: I hear that and it sounds a bit cringy. 433 00:24:43,354 --> 00:24:45,754 Speaker 2: That's the thing that's interesting, right, So it's not just 434 00:24:45,794 --> 00:24:49,514 Speaker 2: a scene, it's a whole sequence, because she explains off 435 00:24:49,714 --> 00:24:52,314 Speaker 2: camera that at the end of every leg of the talk, 436 00:24:52,314 --> 00:24:55,754 Speaker 2: because obviously it's chopped up into legs, they everybody gets 437 00:24:55,754 --> 00:24:59,313 Speaker 2: a bonus and she handwrites them a card, and in 438 00:24:59,354 --> 00:25:01,474 Speaker 2: the most Taylor Swift thing of all times, she also 439 00:25:02,154 --> 00:25:05,674 Speaker 2: signs seals the envelope with a hand pressed wax stamp. 440 00:25:06,114 --> 00:25:09,074 Speaker 2: So there's a lot of takes her weeks so she's 441 00:25:09,114 --> 00:25:12,114 Speaker 2: a lot of footage of her sitting down wax stamping 442 00:25:12,154 --> 00:25:14,434 Speaker 2: all these envelopes, stacking up all the envelopes, putting them 443 00:25:14,434 --> 00:25:15,994 Speaker 2: in piles, giving them to her mom, and then her 444 00:25:16,034 --> 00:25:19,634 Speaker 2: mom's like, wow, Taylor, you hand wrote all these cards, Taylor, 445 00:25:19,674 --> 00:25:21,994 Speaker 2: And she's like, I did. So there's a lot of 446 00:25:22,074 --> 00:25:25,194 Speaker 2: exploration of it. And then you see all the dancers 447 00:25:25,234 --> 00:25:27,314 Speaker 2: stand in the circle. Not only the dancer's got this, 448 00:25:27,394 --> 00:25:30,234 Speaker 2: of course, the audio guys, everybody, you understand, a small 449 00:25:31,034 --> 00:25:35,074 Speaker 2: city is moving around with this. And she hands them out, 450 00:25:35,154 --> 00:25:37,434 Speaker 2: she makes a little speech, they bleep out the amount, 451 00:25:37,514 --> 00:25:40,234 Speaker 2: but then they show you all these press cuttings of 452 00:25:40,274 --> 00:25:40,793 Speaker 2: how much. 453 00:25:40,674 --> 00:25:41,313 Speaker 3: Money it was. 454 00:25:42,034 --> 00:25:43,634 Speaker 1: So how much was it for the dancers? 455 00:25:43,714 --> 00:25:47,514 Speaker 2: They don't say that, but it's rumored to be around 456 00:25:47,514 --> 00:25:49,234 Speaker 2: one hundred thousand, but it could be even more, could 457 00:25:49,274 --> 00:25:51,394 Speaker 2: be much more. But also remember this isn't once, this 458 00:25:51,514 --> 00:25:53,994 Speaker 2: is after every tour, so this is life changing money 459 00:25:54,034 --> 00:25:56,994 Speaker 2: is how it's referred to several times. And I am 460 00:25:57,034 --> 00:25:59,314 Speaker 2: in awe of that. I mean, you know, she cops 461 00:25:59,354 --> 00:26:03,194 Speaker 2: a lot of criticism for being so rich, but I 462 00:26:03,194 --> 00:26:03,594 Speaker 2: don't have. 463 00:26:03,594 --> 00:26:03,994 Speaker 1: To do that. 464 00:26:04,274 --> 00:26:05,994 Speaker 2: She shares that there are a lot of people who don't. 465 00:26:06,034 --> 00:26:08,954 Speaker 2: And I've seen some writing about this show that's like 466 00:26:09,034 --> 00:26:12,874 Speaker 2: it's good because it almost shames the people who don't, 467 00:26:13,034 --> 00:26:16,634 Speaker 2: you know, well because the other hand, is it both. 468 00:26:16,674 --> 00:26:19,834 Speaker 1: No, because if it was less than life changing money, 469 00:26:19,954 --> 00:26:22,394 Speaker 1: it would be cringe. But the fact is that this 470 00:26:22,634 --> 00:26:24,874 Speaker 1: is life changing way she is putting her money where 471 00:26:24,914 --> 00:26:25,674 Speaker 1: her mouth is. 472 00:26:25,954 --> 00:26:28,994 Speaker 4: And this isn't the first report of that, right, Like 473 00:26:29,114 --> 00:26:32,033 Speaker 4: we know that part of the Taylor Swift story is 474 00:26:32,114 --> 00:26:34,954 Speaker 4: how she treats people who work for her. And even 475 00:26:35,314 --> 00:26:36,834 Speaker 4: I can't I'm sure I've said this on the show, 476 00:26:36,834 --> 00:26:39,234 Speaker 4: but when I was in Hamilton Island recently, one of 477 00:26:39,234 --> 00:26:41,914 Speaker 4: the tour guiys was saying, Taylor has stayed at Kualia, 478 00:26:42,074 --> 00:26:46,674 Speaker 4: that really fancy hotel, and she she didn't just stay there. 479 00:26:46,754 --> 00:26:48,553 Speaker 4: She took when she was in Australia, I think it 480 00:26:48,594 --> 00:26:50,754 Speaker 4: was a few years ago, she took her entire crew 481 00:26:51,394 --> 00:26:54,114 Speaker 4: and got them to all stay at this six star 482 00:26:54,274 --> 00:26:58,474 Speaker 4: resort for and it cost her millions, like to do 483 00:26:58,514 --> 00:27:01,954 Speaker 4: it right. And I didn't hear that from Taylor, you know, 484 00:27:02,154 --> 00:27:05,394 Speaker 4: Like I heard that from this random guy on Hamilton Island. 485 00:27:05,554 --> 00:27:09,354 Speaker 4: So let's not be under any illusions though that that's amazing. 486 00:27:09,834 --> 00:27:12,714 Speaker 4: But what she expects from them too. 487 00:27:12,714 --> 00:27:16,874 Speaker 2: Like these people are king, you know what, the level 488 00:27:16,914 --> 00:27:19,314 Speaker 2: of excellence that's required. One of the things that really 489 00:27:19,354 --> 00:27:21,834 Speaker 2: comes across in this show is like they break for 490 00:27:21,914 --> 00:27:24,394 Speaker 2: this leg before they come back to do the bit 491 00:27:24,434 --> 00:27:26,874 Speaker 2: that has tortured poets in it, and during their break 492 00:27:26,914 --> 00:27:29,114 Speaker 2: when they're supposed to be relaxing, they actually all have 493 00:27:29,194 --> 00:27:32,834 Speaker 2: to learn an entire new set. And she's demanding, and 494 00:27:32,874 --> 00:27:36,033 Speaker 2: she is expecting excellence, and she's a perfectionist and all 495 00:27:36,074 --> 00:27:38,954 Speaker 2: those things like that that's not shown up but never 496 00:27:39,074 --> 00:27:42,793 Speaker 2: shouty or yeah yeah, But I think that these people 497 00:27:42,794 --> 00:27:44,234 Speaker 2: are earning that money. 498 00:27:44,554 --> 00:27:46,154 Speaker 1: And then on the other hand, you know who else 499 00:27:46,234 --> 00:27:49,354 Speaker 1: is earning money is like Amazon delivery workers or people 500 00:27:49,394 --> 00:27:51,834 Speaker 1: who work in Amazon factories, and Jeff Bezos isn't writing 501 00:27:51,834 --> 00:27:53,273 Speaker 1: them one hundred thousand dollars checks. 502 00:27:54,554 --> 00:27:58,754 Speaker 2: So do you think that we are moving out of 503 00:27:58,794 --> 00:28:02,194 Speaker 2: a cringe era about saying, yeah, you know what, I 504 00:28:02,314 --> 00:28:06,874 Speaker 2: work hard, I'm bloody talented in a chalameat swifty kind 505 00:28:06,914 --> 00:28:10,954 Speaker 2: of way, or do you think that they're still sneer 506 00:28:10,994 --> 00:28:11,554 Speaker 2: about it. 507 00:28:11,794 --> 00:28:16,434 Speaker 4: I wonder if less than this being a generational story, 508 00:28:16,554 --> 00:28:18,914 Speaker 4: I think it's a cultural one. I don't think an 509 00:28:18,914 --> 00:28:22,954 Speaker 4: Australian artist could ever so Hugh Jackman. 510 00:28:23,074 --> 00:28:23,514 Speaker 1: Or like. 511 00:28:25,034 --> 00:28:29,874 Speaker 4: Kylie or even UK. I read some UK commentary and 512 00:28:29,914 --> 00:28:33,914 Speaker 4: the difference between how the UK and Australia even look 513 00:28:33,914 --> 00:28:37,074 Speaker 4: at the Timothy Shallamy things, and I think that there 514 00:28:37,074 --> 00:28:43,074 Speaker 4: are differences there. But we like humility and we like 515 00:28:43,274 --> 00:28:47,474 Speaker 4: to and to our own detriment like tall poppies, syndrome 516 00:28:47,554 --> 00:28:48,674 Speaker 4: and pulling people down. 517 00:28:48,874 --> 00:28:50,674 Speaker 1: Still true, I do. 518 00:28:51,034 --> 00:28:51,994 Speaker 5: I think it's still true. 519 00:28:52,074 --> 00:28:55,354 Speaker 1: But I don't think that Cape Blanchette is sitting around 520 00:28:55,434 --> 00:28:57,794 Speaker 1: being self deprecating about her acting ability. 521 00:28:58,514 --> 00:29:01,914 Speaker 4: No, but Cate Blanchette, and again I've heard this through 522 00:29:01,994 --> 00:29:07,594 Speaker 4: the industry, is incredibly philanthropic with younger actors, right like 523 00:29:07,634 --> 00:29:10,234 Speaker 4: what she has done. I remember during COVID she and 524 00:29:10,314 --> 00:29:12,714 Speaker 4: I know this from a French not from a press release, 525 00:29:12,794 --> 00:29:17,114 Speaker 4: but basically the way that she provided sort of a 526 00:29:17,114 --> 00:29:21,194 Speaker 4: livable wage for actors who were out of work. If 527 00:29:21,314 --> 00:29:27,274 Speaker 4: Kate bland Chet made a documentary by Kate Blanchett broadcasting that, 528 00:29:28,154 --> 00:29:30,034 Speaker 4: I don't know how we'd feel different if it's like 529 00:29:30,154 --> 00:29:33,714 Speaker 4: true Australian story and it is part of it. We 530 00:29:33,754 --> 00:29:39,394 Speaker 4: interview a journalist but there is this humility, and I 531 00:29:39,394 --> 00:29:42,314 Speaker 4: don't think it's necessarily all a bad thing. 532 00:29:42,554 --> 00:29:45,794 Speaker 1: I've got different theory. Okay, timoth Vy Shallon May and 533 00:29:45,834 --> 00:29:49,394 Speaker 1: Taylor Swift are really good, like they're allowed to say 534 00:29:49,674 --> 00:29:53,154 Speaker 1: they're good. If you actually are just kind of universally 535 00:29:53,194 --> 00:29:58,754 Speaker 1: acknowledged to be really good as those two are at 536 00:29:58,834 --> 00:30:02,514 Speaker 1: acting and singing, respectively, I think you're allowed to say it. 537 00:30:02,594 --> 00:30:04,674 Speaker 4: But like Ian Thorpe was really good and he never 538 00:30:04,674 --> 00:30:06,234 Speaker 4: made a fuss, he just won his medals. 539 00:30:07,314 --> 00:30:08,314 Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know. 540 00:30:08,394 --> 00:30:11,834 Speaker 2: I think it's interesting because do you feel like do 541 00:30:11,914 --> 00:30:15,514 Speaker 2: you too feel like you can you could outwardly state 542 00:30:15,594 --> 00:30:17,594 Speaker 2: being proud of your achievements to it. 543 00:30:18,074 --> 00:30:22,594 Speaker 1: I'm American, so yes, so you're you know, I'm Australian 544 00:30:22,634 --> 00:30:25,994 Speaker 1: Americans so, but the American snydemy says. 545 00:30:25,914 --> 00:30:28,634 Speaker 2: Yes, absolutely, absolutely, Jesse, I know the answer to this 546 00:30:28,674 --> 00:30:28,954 Speaker 2: for you. 547 00:30:28,954 --> 00:30:33,554 Speaker 4: Okay, reserve in Australia, we're a reserve that for our 548 00:30:33,594 --> 00:30:36,834 Speaker 4: performance review or our LinkedIn profile, the two places where 549 00:30:36,834 --> 00:30:38,754 Speaker 4: either we're going to get hired or we're asking for 550 00:30:38,834 --> 00:30:42,274 Speaker 4: more money in a private environment, and even that is excruciating. 551 00:30:42,554 --> 00:30:44,394 Speaker 4: But I have friends who have moved to the US 552 00:30:45,434 --> 00:30:48,074 Speaker 4: tried self deprecation. It doesn't want got looked out like 553 00:30:48,114 --> 00:30:51,594 Speaker 4: they were pathetic, and like, if you're such a piece 554 00:30:51,714 --> 00:30:56,314 Speaker 4: of shit, then why are you at this prestigious academy. 555 00:30:56,434 --> 00:30:59,874 Speaker 1: I want you to resolve something for next year. I 556 00:30:59,994 --> 00:31:02,794 Speaker 1: want you to slip into a conversation with someone you've 557 00:31:02,794 --> 00:31:05,194 Speaker 1: never met before, just one conversation that you are a 558 00:31:05,234 --> 00:31:07,714 Speaker 1: best selling author. I just want you to do and 559 00:31:07,794 --> 00:31:11,514 Speaker 1: see how it goes. Look, I have made her so uncomfortable. 560 00:31:11,714 --> 00:31:17,154 Speaker 1: Do we have to end this segment now? After the break? 561 00:31:17,354 --> 00:31:26,234 Speaker 1: Hosting is hard and why we love it anyway? Alison Roman, 562 00:31:26,514 --> 00:31:30,114 Speaker 1: who is, as you know Jesse, the millennial patron saint 563 00:31:30,234 --> 00:31:32,594 Speaker 1: of cooking. Yeah, think of her as kind of like 564 00:31:32,634 --> 00:31:37,714 Speaker 1: the im parmiter of your generation. Nelly's excuse me, wrote. 565 00:31:37,394 --> 00:31:42,794 Speaker 3: A newsletter jmiel my Jella. 566 00:31:42,914 --> 00:31:47,434 Speaker 1: Perhaps she wrote a newsletter that I absolutely love this week. 567 00:31:47,514 --> 00:31:50,754 Speaker 1: It was called hosting is hard and that's okay because 568 00:31:50,794 --> 00:31:53,394 Speaker 1: we like it. And I'm going to read what she 569 00:31:53,434 --> 00:31:55,714 Speaker 1: said because she's such a good writer. She wrote around 570 00:31:55,714 --> 00:31:57,874 Speaker 1: this time of year, there are a lot of things 571 00:31:57,914 --> 00:32:01,954 Speaker 1: to read about hosting, namely, how to do it without stress, 572 00:32:01,994 --> 00:32:05,154 Speaker 1: how to do it without fuss, or inconvenience. Babe, I 573 00:32:05,234 --> 00:32:08,674 Speaker 1: have news. A lot of hosts is stressful. Do I 574 00:32:08,674 --> 00:32:10,434 Speaker 1: need to breathe this in an American accent? I feel 575 00:32:10,434 --> 00:32:14,354 Speaker 1: like I have news. A lot of hosting is stressful. 576 00:32:14,474 --> 00:32:17,354 Speaker 1: It is inconvenient, and that's oh my god, that accents 577 00:32:17,954 --> 00:32:20,874 Speaker 1: and that's okay. My love hosting, my cooking is an 578 00:32:20,874 --> 00:32:22,554 Speaker 1: act of generosity and care. 579 00:32:23,394 --> 00:32:25,994 Speaker 4: Is that like the captain of the Australian cricket team, 580 00:32:26,034 --> 00:32:30,794 Speaker 4: Pat Commons saying backyard cricket is fun because I like him. 581 00:32:30,834 --> 00:32:33,754 Speaker 5: For me, then I'll say that there's a portion that 582 00:32:33,794 --> 00:32:37,154 Speaker 5: will not know that name. But is it fun for 583 00:32:37,234 --> 00:32:39,154 Speaker 5: Allison because. 584 00:32:38,914 --> 00:32:40,354 Speaker 1: Because she's a famous thing good cook? 585 00:32:40,594 --> 00:32:40,794 Speaker 3: Yes? 586 00:32:40,994 --> 00:32:41,914 Speaker 5: Or is it less fun? 587 00:32:42,034 --> 00:32:44,474 Speaker 4: Because if I get invited to Alison Romans for a 588 00:32:44,474 --> 00:32:49,394 Speaker 4: dinner party, my expectations are high, whereas if I get 589 00:32:49,434 --> 00:32:50,674 Speaker 4: invited to Holly's for. 590 00:32:50,634 --> 00:32:55,434 Speaker 1: Dinner, expectations are low. For the vegetables are high. 591 00:32:56,634 --> 00:32:58,554 Speaker 3: I gave you a h of sources. 592 00:32:59,834 --> 00:33:04,594 Speaker 4: She's the hospitality abilities, which so fair. 593 00:33:04,834 --> 00:33:07,394 Speaker 1: Look Alison. She has a lot of good idea in 594 00:33:07,474 --> 00:33:11,554 Speaker 1: this for how to quickly and easily host over the holidays. 595 00:33:11,674 --> 00:33:15,034 Speaker 1: She suggests hosting a ham party where you get supermarket 596 00:33:15,034 --> 00:33:16,954 Speaker 1: bread rolls and you make a pile of them and 597 00:33:16,994 --> 00:33:19,554 Speaker 1: you just say, enjoy the ham and the bread rolls, 598 00:33:19,594 --> 00:33:21,954 Speaker 1: and then you serve some ice creaming little bowls for dessert. 599 00:33:22,514 --> 00:33:23,714 Speaker 1: Just you're looking at me skeptical. 600 00:33:23,834 --> 00:33:26,754 Speaker 4: It's just that in the pictures she'd made a tree 601 00:33:26,794 --> 00:33:31,154 Speaker 4: of rolls, and I wonder how she's stuck. 602 00:33:31,274 --> 00:33:34,114 Speaker 2: Well, what I wondered is that she stuck a load 603 00:33:34,154 --> 00:33:36,794 Speaker 2: of bread rolls to like a styrofoam cone. And they 604 00:33:36,834 --> 00:33:39,274 Speaker 2: look amazing. But you know what won't look amazing the 605 00:33:39,354 --> 00:33:40,514 Speaker 2: minute someone takes one off. 606 00:33:40,714 --> 00:33:42,954 Speaker 3: Yeah, then you've just got loads of styrofim. Anyway, I'm 607 00:33:42,994 --> 00:33:43,594 Speaker 3: not dissing her. 608 00:33:43,634 --> 00:33:43,874 Speaker 1: She is. 609 00:33:44,314 --> 00:33:44,834 Speaker 3: I love her. 610 00:33:45,234 --> 00:33:48,274 Speaker 2: Her esthetic and I always get that word a bit wrong, 611 00:33:48,314 --> 00:33:53,074 Speaker 2: but is very satisfying. It's very like old Instagram. Everything 612 00:33:53,114 --> 00:33:56,514 Speaker 2: looks beautiful that she That's exactly it lighting. 613 00:33:56,674 --> 00:33:58,114 Speaker 1: It's like she's got an inbuilt filter. 614 00:33:58,274 --> 00:34:01,474 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's quite self serious, but in an earned way, 615 00:34:01,594 --> 00:34:02,554 Speaker 2: because it looks great. 616 00:34:02,634 --> 00:34:04,354 Speaker 1: Yeah to the thing. If you're good, you're good. 617 00:34:04,714 --> 00:34:08,554 Speaker 4: So I appreciate her point there, which is just hosting 618 00:34:08,674 --> 00:34:10,194 Speaker 4: is as hard as you want it to be. 619 00:34:10,393 --> 00:34:13,073 Speaker 1: This is her point, And well, actually I think her 620 00:34:13,074 --> 00:34:15,393 Speaker 1: point goes a bit further. Yeah, her basic point is 621 00:34:15,994 --> 00:34:19,754 Speaker 1: hosting is incredibly annoying, but you just got to do 622 00:34:19,874 --> 00:34:23,034 Speaker 1: it anyway. It's important. It makes you feel good and 623 00:34:23,074 --> 00:34:25,114 Speaker 1: it makes other people feel good. And she has this 624 00:34:25,194 --> 00:34:28,154 Speaker 1: good analogy. She says, we don't let the stress of 625 00:34:28,194 --> 00:34:31,954 Speaker 1: an airport a terrorist from going on vacation. That means holiday. 626 00:34:32,474 --> 00:34:35,754 Speaker 1: So like the trash and work and messy kitchen is 627 00:34:35,834 --> 00:34:39,394 Speaker 1: basically just the airport of the vacation, she says, deal 628 00:34:39,434 --> 00:34:41,154 Speaker 1: with it, suck it up. Holy. 629 00:34:41,394 --> 00:34:45,354 Speaker 2: I very much appreciated this sentiment because I hate hosting. 630 00:34:45,474 --> 00:34:48,714 Speaker 2: That's why I loved the sentiment, because the thing is 631 00:34:48,714 --> 00:34:51,434 Speaker 2: is I'm not I think some people are like natural hosts. 632 00:34:51,514 --> 00:34:54,954 Speaker 2: I have friends who love to host, They love to 633 00:34:54,994 --> 00:34:57,634 Speaker 2: feed people, they love to make people happy, they love 634 00:34:57,714 --> 00:35:01,634 Speaker 2: to open their homes. It's part of their personality. And 635 00:35:01,674 --> 00:35:05,834 Speaker 2: then there are people like Jesse and herself who get 636 00:35:05,954 --> 00:35:09,074 Speaker 2: very anxious about it. But the thing is, what Alison 637 00:35:09,194 --> 00:35:11,754 Speaker 2: Roman is one hundred percent right about is even though 638 00:35:11,754 --> 00:35:14,794 Speaker 2: I get very anxious about it, afterwards, I am so 639 00:35:15,114 --> 00:35:18,114 Speaker 2: glad it happened last Christmas. I'm sure I bought the 640 00:35:18,114 --> 00:35:21,034 Speaker 2: outlouders with it. At the time I did. I hosted Christmas, 641 00:35:21,354 --> 00:35:22,594 Speaker 2: was the first time I've done that in a very 642 00:35:22,594 --> 00:35:25,154 Speaker 2: long time. I had lots of friends and their children 643 00:35:25,234 --> 00:35:27,674 Speaker 2: and their dogs come to our house which is down 644 00:35:27,714 --> 00:35:31,274 Speaker 2: the coast and stay. I was sticking pineapple chunks into 645 00:35:31,314 --> 00:35:35,393 Speaker 2: oranges wrapped in silver foil, which is a very English thing. 646 00:35:35,714 --> 00:35:36,634 Speaker 1: Can you repeat that? 647 00:35:36,754 --> 00:35:39,834 Speaker 3: You get cheese and pineapple tinned pine. 648 00:35:39,834 --> 00:35:40,794 Speaker 1: What sort of cheese? 649 00:35:41,074 --> 00:35:43,754 Speaker 3: Cheddar cheese on a cocktail stick? 650 00:35:44,674 --> 00:35:46,714 Speaker 1: And then otherwise. 651 00:35:48,914 --> 00:35:51,154 Speaker 2: The receptacle to hold it all up is an orange 652 00:35:51,194 --> 00:35:52,354 Speaker 2: wrapped in silver foil. 653 00:35:52,914 --> 00:35:57,594 Speaker 3: The TACKI nineteenth. I don't think ala eat the orange. No, 654 00:35:57,714 --> 00:36:00,913 Speaker 3: the orange is just there to holds up. You eat 655 00:36:00,994 --> 00:36:01,434 Speaker 3: the stick. 656 00:36:01,754 --> 00:36:04,114 Speaker 2: I noticed that Alison Roman's version of this was to 657 00:36:04,114 --> 00:36:06,234 Speaker 2: put lots of olives on a stick. That's the same 658 00:36:06,274 --> 00:36:09,634 Speaker 2: thing anyway. But my point is I am not natural 659 00:36:09,634 --> 00:36:11,434 Speaker 2: at this, but and I got stressed doing that. 660 00:36:11,474 --> 00:36:11,994 Speaker 3: I was worried. 661 00:36:11,994 --> 00:36:14,393 Speaker 2: And it is expensive to anyone listening to this is like, 662 00:36:14,434 --> 00:36:17,033 Speaker 2: I hate hosting. It is expensive even if people bring things. 663 00:36:17,874 --> 00:36:19,634 Speaker 2: But I was so glad I did it because the 664 00:36:19,754 --> 00:36:21,994 Speaker 2: joy of having everybody together. And I don't not going 665 00:36:22,034 --> 00:36:24,794 Speaker 2: to labor this point, but perhaps particularly this year, perhaps 666 00:36:24,794 --> 00:36:28,994 Speaker 2: particularly when things are difficult, being able to be together 667 00:36:29,114 --> 00:36:31,754 Speaker 2: is the point. And if everyone was like, hosting's too 668 00:36:31,834 --> 00:36:33,714 Speaker 2: hard but precious too much. I don't want to do 669 00:36:33,794 --> 00:36:36,994 Speaker 2: it all those things. If everybody did that, where are 670 00:36:36,994 --> 00:36:40,794 Speaker 2: people gathering? Not everybody can do it at a restaurant 671 00:36:40,874 --> 00:36:43,834 Speaker 2: or an app. So I appreciate Ellison's point about that, 672 00:36:43,994 --> 00:36:47,314 Speaker 2: And I also think that for those of us who 673 00:36:47,554 --> 00:36:50,393 Speaker 2: are not good at hosting and like going to other 674 00:36:50,394 --> 00:36:53,114 Speaker 2: people's houses, we could make it much easier for that 675 00:36:53,394 --> 00:36:55,634 Speaker 2: person if we knew how to be better guests. 676 00:36:55,834 --> 00:36:56,473 Speaker 3: Do you know what I mean? 677 00:36:56,714 --> 00:37:00,354 Speaker 1: Are you a good guest? Jesse? I like, because I 678 00:37:00,394 --> 00:37:01,354 Speaker 1: know you're not a good host. 679 00:37:01,474 --> 00:37:04,154 Speaker 4: No, I really like being given a job. But I 680 00:37:04,154 --> 00:37:06,114 Speaker 4: think that statement makes me a bad guess. 681 00:37:06,194 --> 00:37:07,994 Speaker 1: Do you come in and say what can I do? 682 00:37:08,114 --> 00:37:08,834 Speaker 1: And walk into the. 683 00:37:08,834 --> 00:37:12,634 Speaker 4: Kitchen because I have a thing where I also don't 684 00:37:12,714 --> 00:37:16,393 Speaker 4: want to. What I like is when the host isn't 685 00:37:16,434 --> 00:37:20,354 Speaker 4: in the kitchen and I can go all right, clear plates, 686 00:37:21,274 --> 00:37:23,394 Speaker 4: But I don't want to give the person more jobs 687 00:37:23,394 --> 00:37:25,993 Speaker 4: by unpacking the dishwasher and going where do I put 688 00:37:26,034 --> 00:37:28,393 Speaker 4: this pan? Where do I put this cup? Like I 689 00:37:28,434 --> 00:37:31,594 Speaker 4: don't want to be that annoying person. But what I 690 00:37:31,634 --> 00:37:36,234 Speaker 4: appreciated about this article was actually that she sort of 691 00:37:36,274 --> 00:37:39,754 Speaker 4: acknowledged that we're not just two types of people. Some 692 00:37:39,794 --> 00:37:43,954 Speaker 4: people like it, some people don't. Everyone finds stress and 693 00:37:43,994 --> 00:37:45,794 Speaker 4: stressful is kind of part of the point. 694 00:37:45,914 --> 00:37:48,393 Speaker 1: That is so true because you love it, right, so 695 00:37:48,514 --> 00:37:51,594 Speaker 1: I love it, but it's also wildly stressful. I used 696 00:37:51,594 --> 00:37:55,794 Speaker 1: to host a Christmas party when I lived in a tiny, 697 00:37:56,394 --> 00:37:59,674 Speaker 1: one bedroom apartment in New York. Every single year I 698 00:37:59,714 --> 00:38:03,913 Speaker 1: invited everyone. The floor was always so sticky afterwards. I 699 00:38:03,954 --> 00:38:07,594 Speaker 1: don't know why, and it was a huge pain, like 700 00:38:07,674 --> 00:38:10,473 Speaker 1: to slap all this stuff up the stairs and like 701 00:38:10,554 --> 00:38:13,034 Speaker 1: get all the food and get all the drink. Very expensive, 702 00:38:13,074 --> 00:38:15,513 Speaker 1: as you mentioned, Holly, and I look back on those 703 00:38:15,594 --> 00:38:19,354 Speaker 1: Christmas parties. I probably hosted eight or nine of them, 704 00:38:19,474 --> 00:38:22,114 Speaker 1: and I just think that was my youth. I'm so 705 00:38:22,274 --> 00:38:23,354 Speaker 1: glad that I did that. 706 00:38:23,434 --> 00:38:26,874 Speaker 5: And part of that is that some people are annoying. 707 00:38:27,474 --> 00:38:30,914 Speaker 4: Some people will bring something really useful and another person 708 00:38:31,314 --> 00:38:35,194 Speaker 4: will bring barely anything, and that's going to probably piss 709 00:38:35,234 --> 00:38:35,593 Speaker 4: you off. 710 00:38:35,874 --> 00:38:37,794 Speaker 5: Some people aren't going to leave to realize. 711 00:38:38,154 --> 00:38:42,474 Speaker 4: It's like, but all of the social dynamics and irritation 712 00:38:42,834 --> 00:38:45,314 Speaker 4: of just simply being around other people. 713 00:38:45,594 --> 00:38:46,314 Speaker 5: It's the point. 714 00:38:46,834 --> 00:38:51,674 Speaker 1: And also speaking on behalf of people who do ultimately 715 00:38:51,794 --> 00:38:55,514 Speaker 1: enjoy hosting. You just want to see people having a 716 00:38:55,514 --> 00:38:59,674 Speaker 1: good time. Like, honestly, I don't want people to help out. 717 00:38:59,794 --> 00:39:01,994 Speaker 1: I just want to look out at a room of 718 00:39:02,034 --> 00:39:05,154 Speaker 1: people and see them having a good time. That's it. 719 00:39:05,874 --> 00:39:09,314 Speaker 3: That's because you're a wonderful person. It is spread the joy. 720 00:39:09,394 --> 00:39:11,913 Speaker 2: But also, can I offer some advice to those of 721 00:39:11,994 --> 00:39:14,194 Speaker 2: us who want to be helpful to the amailiates of 722 00:39:14,234 --> 00:39:17,034 Speaker 2: the world, not necessarily directly, because to your point about 723 00:39:17,234 --> 00:39:19,354 Speaker 2: you want to have people having a good time, tips 724 00:39:19,354 --> 00:39:24,194 Speaker 2: for good guests, show your appreciation, so always the next day, 725 00:39:24,274 --> 00:39:27,634 Speaker 2: send a text. I mean, I guess in the olden 726 00:39:27,714 --> 00:39:29,473 Speaker 2: days we used to send thank you cards. I think 727 00:39:29,474 --> 00:39:31,913 Speaker 2: we can leave that, but send a text being like. 728 00:39:32,394 --> 00:39:34,433 Speaker 1: I don't think we can leave that. I think if 729 00:39:34,434 --> 00:39:36,194 Speaker 1: you're invited to a small dinner party, you need to 730 00:39:36,194 --> 00:39:40,354 Speaker 1: send a handwritten note in the mail yep in with 731 00:39:40,474 --> 00:39:45,354 Speaker 1: a stamp. Yes, yes, a dinner party, not a party party. 732 00:39:45,474 --> 00:39:48,473 Speaker 1: A dinner party, you need to send a note. Yes. 733 00:39:49,674 --> 00:39:52,553 Speaker 1: I'm basically Taylor Swift without the one hundred thousand dollars 734 00:39:52,634 --> 00:39:53,354 Speaker 1: check you're right. 735 00:39:53,434 --> 00:39:55,314 Speaker 2: Taylor Swift would do that, and she would have the 736 00:39:55,354 --> 00:39:57,073 Speaker 2: wax about you have the wax. 737 00:39:58,194 --> 00:40:00,754 Speaker 3: Anyway, show your appreciation. 738 00:40:00,434 --> 00:40:03,354 Speaker 5: Right, show we need to pretend that I do. 739 00:40:03,554 --> 00:40:05,754 Speaker 1: Like that you mentioned one thing here you said send 740 00:40:05,794 --> 00:40:08,234 Speaker 1: it the next day. That's important. Yes, when people send 741 00:40:08,274 --> 00:40:11,074 Speaker 1: at night off, they're often drunk and it doesn't mean 742 00:40:11,074 --> 00:40:13,714 Speaker 1: as much like if you send it the next day means. 743 00:40:13,834 --> 00:40:16,274 Speaker 2: Send them send a message the next day. Also, when 744 00:40:16,314 --> 00:40:19,234 Speaker 2: you're there, express what a good time you're having, you know, 745 00:40:19,314 --> 00:40:21,274 Speaker 2: like Amelia wants to look out and see you having 746 00:40:21,314 --> 00:40:21,594 Speaker 2: good time. 747 00:40:21,674 --> 00:40:22,674 Speaker 3: So if you're not fake. 748 00:40:22,794 --> 00:40:25,714 Speaker 1: Oh and you know what, talk to some people so 749 00:40:25,834 --> 00:40:28,754 Speaker 1: I don't have to worry like in this like anxious way. 750 00:40:28,834 --> 00:40:30,434 Speaker 1: Introduce you with some now portraits. 751 00:40:30,594 --> 00:40:32,594 Speaker 2: Yeah, a few of the tips that I got from 752 00:40:32,674 --> 00:40:34,074 Speaker 2: the internet to tell me how to be a better 753 00:40:34,114 --> 00:40:36,754 Speaker 2: guess because most of them might have broken at various points. 754 00:40:37,674 --> 00:40:39,913 Speaker 3: Rs VP and don't be late very often at. 755 00:40:39,914 --> 00:40:41,154 Speaker 1: Least, but don't be early. 756 00:40:41,674 --> 00:40:44,194 Speaker 3: You can't be early ten minutes late. 757 00:40:44,234 --> 00:40:44,714 Speaker 5: That's a rule. 758 00:40:44,914 --> 00:40:47,513 Speaker 1: I think the big of the party, the slightly lady 759 00:40:47,554 --> 00:40:48,034 Speaker 1: you want to be. 760 00:40:48,754 --> 00:40:51,554 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, if you are asked to bring something into 761 00:40:51,594 --> 00:40:54,394 Speaker 2: Amelia's point, not everybody wants to you to bring something. 762 00:40:54,674 --> 00:40:56,393 Speaker 3: Bring what you're asked to bring. 763 00:40:56,754 --> 00:40:58,873 Speaker 5: Exactly what you are asked. 764 00:40:58,914 --> 00:41:00,473 Speaker 3: Don't be like, oh, you know what would be good 765 00:41:00,994 --> 00:41:01,834 Speaker 3: this thing like no. 766 00:41:02,914 --> 00:41:05,714 Speaker 1: Day, I keep modifying these rules. I think you should 767 00:41:05,754 --> 00:41:08,874 Speaker 1: propose to bring something and say does that work? Because 768 00:41:08,914 --> 00:41:11,594 Speaker 1: it's annoying to say what can I bring? Be like, 769 00:41:11,714 --> 00:41:14,274 Speaker 1: I'm going to bring a plate, a bowl of strawberries 770 00:41:14,314 --> 00:41:15,194 Speaker 1: and some whipped cream. 771 00:41:15,954 --> 00:41:18,873 Speaker 4: That's and I think classy, that's amazing, and I think 772 00:41:18,914 --> 00:41:21,794 Speaker 4: be really specific. So don't say I'm going to bring 773 00:41:21,874 --> 00:41:25,754 Speaker 4: a fruit platter. Say exactly, and like even get a 774 00:41:25,794 --> 00:41:28,553 Speaker 4: sense of like how how many bread rolls like that? 775 00:41:28,554 --> 00:41:28,634 Speaker 2: That? 776 00:41:28,794 --> 00:41:31,154 Speaker 1: Just don't ask me how many like rock melons in 777 00:41:31,194 --> 00:41:31,594 Speaker 1: your fruit. 778 00:41:32,674 --> 00:41:37,033 Speaker 2: If you know your host, well help out as much 779 00:41:37,034 --> 00:41:39,034 Speaker 2: as you know they would want you to. Some women, 780 00:41:39,274 --> 00:41:42,074 Speaker 2: in particular, don't want a gender stereotap, want you out 781 00:41:42,074 --> 00:41:44,194 Speaker 2: of the kitchen. They don't want you around their kitchen. 782 00:41:44,554 --> 00:41:47,234 Speaker 2: Other people are like, please, I don't want to wash 783 00:41:47,234 --> 00:41:49,194 Speaker 2: a dish. I've just done all this for you guys, 784 00:41:49,314 --> 00:41:51,873 Speaker 2: you tidy up. But I think that's an individual thing and. 785 00:41:51,834 --> 00:41:53,754 Speaker 1: You can't need to know. And it also depends on 786 00:41:53,754 --> 00:41:56,194 Speaker 1: your space. When I hosted my Christmas parties in New York, 787 00:41:56,314 --> 00:41:59,993 Speaker 1: my kitchen was my living room, was my sitting room, 788 00:42:00,274 --> 00:42:02,594 Speaker 1: was my entrance for so that sort of helps. 789 00:42:02,754 --> 00:42:04,114 Speaker 3: Know when to leave. 790 00:42:04,674 --> 00:42:07,794 Speaker 1: To Jesse's earlier, I never leave. I never want people 791 00:42:07,794 --> 00:42:08,034 Speaker 1: to eave. 792 00:42:08,154 --> 00:42:09,834 Speaker 3: Oh no, I definitely want people to leave. 793 00:42:09,914 --> 00:42:11,433 Speaker 2: You've got to be like, I love that you're here, 794 00:42:11,474 --> 00:42:13,033 Speaker 2: but it's time for you to go now I'm tired. 795 00:42:13,474 --> 00:42:16,513 Speaker 4: I think that's when someone either stops speaking because they've 796 00:42:16,554 --> 00:42:19,154 Speaker 4: drunk too much, or is speaking too much because they've 797 00:42:19,194 --> 00:42:19,754 Speaker 4: drunk too much. 798 00:42:19,754 --> 00:42:22,354 Speaker 2: I think that's your hands and be like, we're ordering Uber. Well, 799 00:42:22,354 --> 00:42:24,234 Speaker 2: not where I live, you can't, but we're in the city. 800 00:42:24,554 --> 00:42:25,154 Speaker 3: Clap your hands. 801 00:42:25,194 --> 00:42:26,314 Speaker 1: We're ordering Ubers now. 802 00:42:26,394 --> 00:42:29,634 Speaker 4: If a very bright light has just turned on, leave 803 00:42:29,754 --> 00:42:30,674 Speaker 4: pick up the cues. 804 00:42:30,994 --> 00:42:32,074 Speaker 3: Yes, that's the thing. 805 00:42:32,154 --> 00:42:33,953 Speaker 2: A good guest can pick up the cues. If your 806 00:42:33,994 --> 00:42:36,994 Speaker 2: host is standing up and going, well, hasn't this been lovely? 807 00:42:39,234 --> 00:42:41,074 Speaker 5: Can shave they're in their pajamas. 808 00:42:41,634 --> 00:42:45,034 Speaker 1: One related tip for hosts here is I think everyone 809 00:42:45,074 --> 00:42:48,154 Speaker 1: should order Domino's pizza for a party at ten pm. 810 00:42:48,754 --> 00:42:52,433 Speaker 4: Oh okay, So on that I was on Reddit and 811 00:42:52,594 --> 00:42:55,513 Speaker 4: I saw this person there was a whole thread about 812 00:42:55,514 --> 00:42:56,834 Speaker 4: I want to be a better host. I don't know 813 00:42:56,834 --> 00:42:58,274 Speaker 4: how to be a good host. And there was a 814 00:42:58,314 --> 00:43:01,913 Speaker 4: comment that said host like a man, and by that 815 00:43:02,034 --> 00:43:05,434 Speaker 4: they said drinks just say drinks in the fridge, snacks 816 00:43:05,434 --> 00:43:07,034 Speaker 4: on the counter, we're ordering pizza. 817 00:43:08,314 --> 00:43:10,194 Speaker 1: It hosts like a man. I loved that. 818 00:43:10,274 --> 00:43:12,954 Speaker 4: If you're feeling the pressure and you're feeling overwhelmed, go 819 00:43:13,874 --> 00:43:17,433 Speaker 4: when Luca has friends over, why isn't he stressed? And 820 00:43:17,474 --> 00:43:21,234 Speaker 4: it's like because he he doesn't even put the chips 821 00:43:21,234 --> 00:43:21,674 Speaker 4: in a bowl. 822 00:43:22,194 --> 00:43:22,993 Speaker 3: That's always why. 823 00:43:24,874 --> 00:43:28,194 Speaker 2: That's why, because Brent's exactly the same, held his friends 824 00:43:28,234 --> 00:43:30,314 Speaker 2: around and it's just like ten bags of doritos. 825 00:43:31,714 --> 00:43:36,074 Speaker 1: Also, there are different types. 826 00:43:36,234 --> 00:43:37,473 Speaker 3: Everyone has a good time. 827 00:43:37,794 --> 00:43:40,194 Speaker 2: But that's also why when he says, shall we have 828 00:43:40,314 --> 00:43:41,033 Speaker 2: people over? 829 00:43:41,154 --> 00:43:42,393 Speaker 3: And I go oh, and. 830 00:43:42,354 --> 00:43:43,794 Speaker 1: He goes, what are you worry about? 831 00:43:44,954 --> 00:43:48,554 Speaker 2: But anyway, out Louders, whether you are hosting this holiday season, 832 00:43:48,554 --> 00:43:50,634 Speaker 2: whether you are going to be a guest, look, it 833 00:43:50,714 --> 00:43:53,354 Speaker 2: is good to be together. Her point about you don't 834 00:43:53,354 --> 00:43:55,154 Speaker 2: remember the airport after the holiday is. 835 00:43:55,154 --> 00:43:58,114 Speaker 1: So throw out, throw out a gurrito buffet of some 836 00:43:58,194 --> 00:43:58,794 Speaker 1: people over. 837 00:44:00,434 --> 00:44:02,754 Speaker 2: That is all we've got time for. Out Louders on 838 00:44:02,794 --> 00:44:06,234 Speaker 2: this Wednesday. We appreciate you as always for being here 839 00:44:06,274 --> 00:44:09,514 Speaker 2: with us, and to our amazing team for helping us 840 00:44:09,514 --> 00:44:10,794 Speaker 2: put the show together today. 841 00:44:11,074 --> 00:44:12,074 Speaker 3: We're going to be back in. 842 00:44:12,034 --> 00:44:15,994 Speaker 2: Your ears tomorrow with an episode for our subscribers about 843 00:44:15,994 --> 00:44:17,314 Speaker 2: the year's glimmers. 844 00:44:18,114 --> 00:44:22,674 Speaker 3: Bye Bye, Mamma. 845 00:44:22,714 --> 00:44:25,794 Speaker 2: Mia acknowledges the traditional owners of the land on which 846 00:44:25,834 --> 00:44:27,434 Speaker 2: we have recorded this podcast.