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Speaker 1: A team. Welcome to another installment of the Youth Project.

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Speaker 1: Craig Anthony, Harper, Peter, what would it be, Peter, Michael Sage,

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Speaker 1: Peter Anthony. I wonder if it's a vow. What's your

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Speaker 1: middle name? Bro?

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Speaker 2: You'd have been guessing for a while. I don't have one.

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Speaker 1: Oh, well, there you go, Peter Sage. Now Peter Sage

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Speaker 1: and I connected through Tony Man's. Tony jack Mans, who's

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Speaker 1: a friend of mine who's been on the show a

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Speaker 1: little bit talking about his journey, said you've got to

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Speaker 1: get this bloke on. He changed my life. And so

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Speaker 1: if you change someone's life, and somebody's pumping up your tires,

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Speaker 1: that's an Australian expression, mate, pumping up your tires. So

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Speaker 1: he speaks highly of you. So I'm excited to chat

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Speaker 1: with you. Welcome to the You Project, Craig.

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Speaker 2: Real pleasure to be here. And again, any recommendation from

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Speaker 2: Tony is something I'm happy to contribute to.

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Speaker 1: Well, we appreciate you. Now without me reading out some

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Speaker 1: I was going to say some boring bio. It's definitely

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Speaker 1: not a boring buyer. But rather than me read something

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Speaker 1: off a computer screen, tell my audience a little bit

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Speaker 1: about you. Some will know you, but a lot won't

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Speaker 1: tell my group a little bit about who you are

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Speaker 1: and what you do. If you don't mind, please certainly.

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Speaker 2: And there's two sides of this. One is I'll give

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Speaker 2: you a brief overview. The other is to remind you

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Speaker 2: I'm just a guy.

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Speaker 1: It's a blind Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I dropped out of school of sixteen. I've got no

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Speaker 2: formal education. I went I got a PhD in results.

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Speaker 2: I started my first company at seventeen. Since then probably

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Speaker 2: had twenty seven to twenty eight companies, many internationals. Some

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Speaker 2: have been multimillion dollar success stories, some have been absolute failures,

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Speaker 2: some have wiped me out at the knees, some should

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Speaker 2: have stayed ideas when I was drunk, and pretty much

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Speaker 2: everything in between. But through that journey as a born

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Speaker 2: and bred entrepreneur, the parallel journey that I had starting

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Speaker 2: at seventeen was personal growth, human behavior, trying to understand

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Speaker 2: why we do what we do. We'll guess this up

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Speaker 2: in the morning, excited or not. And so that's really

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Speaker 2: what my journey is, A sort of come full circle

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Speaker 2: to teaching that now my main business now for the

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Speaker 2: last two to three years, has really been focusing on

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Speaker 2: how to help other people learn from most of my mistakes.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, just a guy. I've seen a lot, done,

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Speaker 2: a lot, made, a lot, lost a lot, had a

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Speaker 2: lot of fun. Here to help if I can.

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Speaker 1: The world is your classroom and every day is a lesson. Dude,

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Speaker 1: Same with me, Same with me. What did you you

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Speaker 1: said you some things work, some things didn't work, and

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Speaker 1: you know, failure, lesson growth, whatever we want to call it,

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Speaker 1: but let's let's go with failure for the moment. What

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Speaker 1: did the failures teach you? And I'm sure there was

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Speaker 1: a range of lessons, but what did you learn through

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Speaker 1: fucking up? What did you learn through not getting the

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Speaker 1: outcome that you wanted?

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Speaker 2: I often telp, but failure is my biggest capital per

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Speaker 2: Most people link the word failure because they've had an

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Speaker 2: indoctrination through the school system of thinking if you fail something,

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Speaker 2: then your life is over, You're not good enough. It

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Speaker 2: triggers the fear that we are and all of that

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Speaker 2: deeply shame. And that's not if you know, there is

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Speaker 2: no real failure in business. There's only a different outcome

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Speaker 2: to what you want it. And so it was important

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Speaker 2: to understand that failure In that regard that the biggest

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Speaker 2: lesson you want to learn is to how to reframe

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Speaker 2: failure because there is no failure, it's just different outcomes.

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Speaker 2: And business is dynamic, it's always moving, things are always changing.

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Speaker 2: There's a thousand things that they outside of your control

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Speaker 2: that you never can control. So learning how to roll

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Speaker 2: and flow with the bends of the river of life

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Speaker 2: rather than fight the current and swim upstream is probably

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Speaker 2: one of your biggest assets or skills as an entrepreneur. So, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I learned a lot. I also learned that business is

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Speaker 2: about adding value. It's not about trying to get something.

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Speaker 2: You don't get sales. You serve clients. And from that perspective,

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Speaker 2: it shifted a lot in my early days.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I love it. Did you ever get to

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Speaker 1: you know, what's that saying? It's something like, you know,

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Speaker 1: make sure you're climbing the right mountain? Right, did you

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Speaker 1: ever get to the top of the mountain? And did

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Speaker 1: you ever get to the top of the mountain?

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Speaker 2: Go?

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Speaker 1: Oh fucking hell, this is not the one. This is

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Speaker 1: like the view is good, but this isn't what I thought,

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Speaker 1: and this isn't where I need to be.

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Speaker 2: It took me, thankfully early in my career mid twenties,

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Speaker 2: until I finally realized there was a massive difference between

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Speaker 2: a life chasing success and a life chasing fulfillment. And

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Speaker 2: so many people, as you say, get to the top

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Speaker 2: of success mount and they want to jump off right

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Speaker 2: because they were sold even the entrepreneurial lie. And this

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Speaker 2: is so if it wasn't as tragic, it would be comedic.

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Speaker 2: And that is that I've seen so many people that

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Speaker 2: slave away, sacrificing everything to try to elbow their way

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Speaker 2: up that mountain. And even if they get their number,

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Speaker 2: and everyone's got a number, but even if they get it,

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Speaker 2: which is the one percent of the one percent that

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Speaker 2: finally cash out, right, They've sacrificed their relationship, They've missed

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Speaker 2: their kids growing up, They've put everything in blood, sweat

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Speaker 2: and tears. They get the top of success mountain, they

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Speaker 2: cash in. What do they actually do with their money?

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Speaker 2: When I've coached enough of them, I'll tell you The

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Speaker 2: first thing is they do is they pay for their divorce.

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Speaker 2: The second thing is they try to hire a personal

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Speaker 2: trainer at best or a surgeon at worst to try

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Speaker 2: to get their health back. And then they buy their

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Speaker 2: kids loads of crap so they hopefully love them again.

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Speaker 2: It's the entrepreneurial joke. So understanding how to navigate what

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Speaker 2: you would cause success mountain and turn that into fulfillment

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Speaker 2: mountain is a big psychological shift for a lot of people,

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Speaker 2: and part of it was driven by you say, what

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Speaker 2: I learned from failure? One of the things I learned

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Speaker 2: is that trying to prove to the world that you're

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Speaker 2: good enough in order to avoid the insecurities that you're not,

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Speaker 2: which I had many of, is a fool's gain. Why

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Speaker 2: because eighty percent of people don't care about your problems

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Speaker 2: and the other twenty percent they're glad you have them.

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Speaker 1: So fucking true. Why do you say, why do you

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Speaker 1: think that is great? That's great. It's kind of brute,

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Speaker 1: but kind of true. Why do you think that we

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Speaker 1: are and I'm talking about the collective we so maybe

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Speaker 1: not every person listening, but definitely me for a lot

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Speaker 1: of my life. Why are we so desperate to get

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Speaker 1: approval from people who don't love us or you know,

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Speaker 1: oftentimes even care about us. What is that?

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Speaker 2: It's a rotualization, but it's accurate. And primary reason for

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Speaker 2: that is because as human beings. We have two natural fears.

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Speaker 2: We're born with two fears, the fear of loud noises

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Speaker 2: and the fear of falling. Everything else is learned and

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Speaker 2: just through the psychological journey of how we take on

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Speaker 2: the role as parenting as human beings. I'm not saying

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Speaker 2: it's right along and I don't have any other answers

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Speaker 2: because A, I'm not a parent. You know, I have

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Speaker 2: two Jack Russell Terriers, right, they're my kids. But when

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Speaker 2: it comes to understanding that the journey, it's worth looking

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Speaker 2: at it from this angle, and that is that when

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Speaker 2: a baby's born, it has what we call unconditional love.

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Speaker 2: Why because if it wakes you up at two in

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Speaker 2: the morning, it's in con venient as a parent, but

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Speaker 2: you don't blame the baby because it's what babies do.

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Speaker 2: And without that level of attention, A, you're a bad

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Speaker 2: parent and be it'll probably die. We call it failure

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Speaker 2: to thrive centrome if it doesn't have the physical touch

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Speaker 2: of nature, because babies are one hundred percent useless when

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Speaker 2: it comes to self sufficiency. It's just part of the game.

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Speaker 2: And the reason for that is they have mirror neurons

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Speaker 2: because they're there to learn from their environment. We don't

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Speaker 2: have that many in built instincts, like things that hatch

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Speaker 2: out of an egg and never see their parents. So

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Speaker 2: at around eighteen months to two years old, right, babies

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Speaker 2: go through a transition, which we collectively call the Terrible twos. Right, well,

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Speaker 2: all of a sudden, now they go from this cute

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Speaker 2: little baby to this foot stomping terror. Right now, Why

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Speaker 2: is that? Parents don't know? Well, it's understanding the psychology.

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Speaker 2: You've just had your entire life of two years being

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Speaker 2: the center of attention. Now you're no longer the center

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Speaker 2: of attention, but you still want to be. There's a

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Speaker 2: kick back to that, So it's understanding context. But at

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Speaker 2: some point during that journey of two to three to

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Speaker 2: four years old, the parents understand that there is now

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Speaker 2: a feedback mechanism. The baby is now starting to understand

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Speaker 2: levels of communication. Which is why the first word most

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Speaker 2: people learn humans is no, right, because it's what they

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Speaker 2: hear the most, because parents are always saying don't do that,

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Speaker 2: don't do that out of fear and security for the kid. However,

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Speaker 2: if we take out earliest memory four five six years old,

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Speaker 2: the reason that most people have such a fear of

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Speaker 2: failure or are desperately trying to prove to the world

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Speaker 2: that good enough, regardless of whether the world validates it

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Speaker 2: or not. Is because when that the model of parenting

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Speaker 2: that is then overlaid, when there is two way communication

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Speaker 2: is that if you do something I approve of or

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Speaker 2: I think is in your best interest, I reward you

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Speaker 2: with validation, approval, yeah, love, et cetera. When you do

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Speaker 2: something outside of what I deem to be the correct behavior,

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Speaker 2: the perception of the child not the reality, because the

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Speaker 2: parent still loves the kid, but the perception of the

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Speaker 2: child is that love, approval, validation is withdrawn, so that

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Speaker 2: by the time we get to our earliest memory, we've

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Speaker 2: already got several years of being conditioned that love is

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Speaker 2: earned through correct behavior, and we then spend the rest

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Speaker 2: of our lives validating that in our own relationships. But

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Speaker 2: more importantly, it instills the primary human fear that every

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Speaker 2: single person has to some degree, and that is the

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Speaker 2: fear we're not enough yeah wow, which, ultimately, if you

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Speaker 2: peel back the onion, one more layer is the fear

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Speaker 2: we won't be loved. So we spend most of our

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Speaker 2: life adapting our behavior consciously or unconsciously forming a personality

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Speaker 2: consciously or unconsciously around trying to get the approval of validation.

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Speaker 2: If your parents were angry and you had to toe

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Speaker 2: the line, you became a people. Please.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: If you parents were chaotic, you had to try to

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Speaker 2: form some level of control. If your parents were distant,

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Speaker 2: you'd create more imagination in your head, and now you're

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Speaker 2: a dreamer. That there's many patterns that are fixed that

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Speaker 2: then project throughout our lives, but ultimately their adaptation mechanisms

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Speaker 2: to avoid the primary fear that were not enough.

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Speaker 1: One of my favorite quotes from Oscar Wilde is be yourself.

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Speaker 1: Everyone else has already taken just taken right, and that.

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Speaker 1: I love that. That's kind of cute, but it at

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Speaker 1: the same time, like a lot of the messaging, especially

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Speaker 1: for young people, is no, you need to look like this,

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Speaker 1: you need to be drinking this, you need to be

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Speaker 1: driving that, you need to be wearing that. And not

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Speaker 1: just young people, I guess, especially being reinforced, I had

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Speaker 1: to sound like the old guy. But you know, social

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Speaker 1: media serves. Social media is just a tool. I'm not

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Speaker 1: against social media at all. I use it, You use it,

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Speaker 1: you know, and it can do some really good things,

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Speaker 1: But there's this kind of there's this dichotomy of messages.

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Speaker 1: On the one hand, we're being told you're enough, you're

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Speaker 1: all you need, you know, be you be authentic, but

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Speaker 1: we're also being told, no, you need to have more

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Speaker 1: of this lesson, that you need to be bigger and

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Speaker 1: leaner and prettier and handsomer and all of these things,

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Speaker 1: you know, and that on a level, I feel like

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Speaker 1: we're trying to resolve internal issues with external solutions Peter.

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Speaker 2: Correct, and it's never going to happen. Why Because the

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Speaker 2: number one rule of relationships, for example, is nobody can

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Speaker 2: ever love you more than you love yourself. And if

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Speaker 2: you're constantly seeking external validation to cover up internal securities,

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Speaker 2: you're you're running east looking for a sunset. And while

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Speaker 2: you're running east looking for that sunset, then you're being

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Speaker 2: sold at the problem. The reason you haven't seen the

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Speaker 2: sunset yet is you haven't got the right sneakers, you

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Speaker 2: haven't got the right diet, you haven't hired the right

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Speaker 2: person trainer. You're just not hustling hard enough, and so

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Speaker 2: you buy into all the external solutions hoping that one day,

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Speaker 2: if you just crack the code, that sunset will appear.

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Speaker 2: And it's a fundamental paradigm shift that most people need

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Speaker 2: a break out of, which is why I said, most

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Speaker 2: people don't care about your problem. The other twenty percent

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Speaker 2: they're glad you have them. Yeah, stop trying to validate

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Speaker 2: yourself through the eyes of others. It's never gonna work.

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Speaker 2: So if you want to resolve some of that, let's

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Speaker 2: get practical. Right, if we create a model of understanding

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Speaker 2: ourselves in the mirror, which most people have no clue

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Speaker 2: how to interpret apart from through the lens of insecurity.

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Speaker 2: Not good enough. Oh yeah, I noticed what's wrong before

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Speaker 2: I notice what's right. I can't even receive compliments that

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Speaker 2: kind of stuff. Poor self image. You want to see

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Speaker 2: an area people destroy themselves, it's self image. And so

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Speaker 2: let's create a model. Einstein said something powerful. He said,

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Speaker 2: you can't solve a problem at the same level of

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Speaker 2: consciousness that created the problem. Sounds pretty smart. He was

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Speaker 2: a smart guy. What the hell does it mean? Well,

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Speaker 2: if you take the word consciousness, you've kind of got

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Speaker 2: two camps. You've got the left brainers that are still

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Speaker 2: trying to prove the thesis that the brain creates consciousness

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Speaker 2: and They've never been able to prove that, nor will

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Speaker 2: they because the brain doesn't create consciousness any more than

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Speaker 2: the television creates producers and writes programs. Right, it's you know,

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Speaker 2: it doesn't work that way. On the other side, the

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Speaker 2: right brainers at the extreme other end, are all about,

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Speaker 2: you know, connect to the divine. Let's hold hands sincome

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Speaker 2: by our and some magical formula will present itself and

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Speaker 2: we all love each other. Doesn't pay the mortgage on Friday.

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Speaker 2: So let's try to look at how we can get

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Speaker 2: value from what Einstein was trying to teach us. So

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Speaker 2: if we take conscious and if you struggle with the

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Speaker 2: word yet, just call it awareness, right, because that's ultimately

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Speaker 2: what you are. You are an awareness.

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Speaker 3: Right.

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Speaker 2: So there are four levels, and this is a model.

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Speaker 2: It's only a model, and we use models just to

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Speaker 2: try to get some advantage as to how we can

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Speaker 2: be better. Right, it's not the truth, because you know,

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Speaker 2: I actually do know the truth with the capital T, right,

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Speaker 2: And anyone else tells you a different truth is because

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Speaker 2: they're trying to sell you some other crap. So I'll

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Speaker 2: give it you for free. Here's the truth with the

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Speaker 2: capital T. We don't know the damn truth. Right, So

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Speaker 2: let's just own that. So this is just a model, right,

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Speaker 2: four levels, four levels of consciousness. The first level at

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Speaker 2: the bottom of the tree is what I call the

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Speaker 2: level of to me, also known as victimhood. Why because

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Speaker 2: the mantra of to me goes something like this, Well,

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Speaker 2: I would have the house, the car, the body, of

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Speaker 2: the relationship, the life I want, but everything happens to me. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: now that sucks. And nowhere in the universe does life

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Speaker 2: reward that level of consciousness other than to give you

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Speaker 2: more crap to complain about. And some people then validate

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Speaker 2: themselves by that story, which is why you try to

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Speaker 2: solve their problem, they'll hang onto it like a trophy.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 2: Or you manage to solve their problem, they'll go find

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Speaker 2: and another one.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, right.

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Speaker 2: If their enemy dies, they'll find somebody else to blame

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Speaker 2: and complain about. Right, it's the level of victimhood. And

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Speaker 2: unfortunately there's a lot of people that get stuck there

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Speaker 2: for one reason or another. But ultimately, if you're maturing emotionally,

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Speaker 2: you know which is a choice. You know, we don't

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Speaker 2: get to choose whether we're mature physically. You and I

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Speaker 2: certainly aware of that, but biologically it's part of the

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Speaker 2: rule set. Emotionally, spiritually, energetically, it's a choice. So if

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Speaker 2: you choose to want to grow out of victimhood, you

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Speaker 2: move to the second level of consciousness, and that level

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Speaker 2: is what I call buy me. Why because you're sick

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Speaker 2: and tired of being a victim. You know you want

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Speaker 2: the life you want and if it's going to happen,

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Speaker 2: it's going to happen by me. Yeah, I'm not waiting

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Speaker 2: for the life to come save me. No one's coming

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Speaker 2: to do that. People in victim mode secretly hope someone's

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Speaker 2: coming to save it. Ever, never gonna happen. Right, So

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Speaker 2: the problem in buy me is this, you are now

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Speaker 2: fighting reality. You're swimming upstream against the current and you

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Speaker 2: are you're kind of bending the branch back on the

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Speaker 2: tree of life, and every time you let go, it

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Speaker 2: slaps you in the face. It's exhausting. You can hustle

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Speaker 2: and get stuff done, but that's running up success mountain,

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Speaker 2: getting to the top and saying I don't like the view,

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Speaker 2: or dying of a heart attack halfway. That's the game.

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Speaker 2: Most most of personal growth. Most people listening to podcasts

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Speaker 2: like this are in one of two camps. Either they're

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Speaker 2: in to me, trying to get to buy me and

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Speaker 2: just need that motivation, that kick up the backside, that

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Speaker 2: reminder that it's not who they are, or they're in

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Speaker 2: low by me, trying to get to a higher level

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Speaker 2: of buy me. Yeah, I earn fifty grand a year,

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Speaker 2: I want one hundred and fifty. I earn a million,

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Speaker 2: I want ten million. I want to ten next this

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Speaker 2: I want to It's the hustle mentality. It's the how

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Speaker 2: do I get more? How do I achieve more? Do more? Right?

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Speaker 2: Because victimhood looking over my shoulder ain't where I want

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Speaker 2: to go. So I want to move forward, thinking the

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Speaker 2: further I get from that, the better my life will be.

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Speaker 2: Not realizing that you're now getting exhausted, You're burnt out,

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Speaker 2: stressed out, you don't have energy to sleep with your

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Speaker 2: partner at night. You've forgotten what your kid's birthday because

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Speaker 2: you're too busy trying to keep your eyes away with caffeine.

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Speaker 2: You get the idea. So by me is a necessary

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Speaker 2: stage of development, but it is not where all the

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Speaker 2: fulfillment lies. That comes in step three, third level of consciousness,

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Speaker 2: which is what I call Through me and through me

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Speaker 2: is where you stop fighting the river of life and

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Speaker 2: you start learning how to sail with the bends. You're

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Speaker 2: no longer trying to resist. You're practicing a level of

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Speaker 2: non resistance. You're not passive. It's not from an apathetic

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Speaker 2: level of victimhood into me, but it's not the go

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Speaker 2: go go achiever level in by me. You're now in

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Speaker 2: a flow state. You're in a creative state, and that

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Speaker 2: has where synchronicity shows up. It's where things just to

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Speaker 2: unfold far more effortlessly. You meet the right people, the

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Speaker 2: right things tend to fall into place. Now, the fourth

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Speaker 2: level at the top of the tree is not something

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Speaker 2: I'm qualified to talk about. We call that asthmi. That's

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Speaker 2: essentially non duality, oneness, where you recognize yourself in everybody else.

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Speaker 2: It's where the spiritual masters talk from. But again out

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Speaker 2: of my pay grade speciality. My market I've devoted my

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Speaker 2: life to is getting people from buy me to through me.

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Speaker 2: Why Because I know what it's like to work one

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Speaker 2: hundred and thirty three hours a week, drive home from

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Speaker 2: the office at two in the morning every night, and

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Speaker 2: one night fall asleep and hit an intersection at sixty

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Speaker 2: miles an hour. I know that game and wondering what

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Speaker 2: the hell am I doing? Luckily I was twenty five

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Speaker 2: when that happened, and it woke me up literally physically

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Speaker 2: and emotional, and I started to ask what is this about?

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Speaker 2: But if you want a path again, make it practical.

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Speaker 3: I don't.

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Speaker 2: There's too much philosophy around. We need stuff. As Jodaspen says,

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Speaker 2: it's not enough to know these days now, you need

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Speaker 2: to know how.

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Speaker 1: Yes, right?

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Speaker 2: So from my side, how do you get from victimhood

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Speaker 2: to achiever? How do you go from to me to

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Speaker 2: buy me? What do you got to give up? What

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Speaker 2: do you got to replace it with? Pretty simple? First

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Speaker 2: thing you have to give up is blame. Blame doesn't

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Speaker 2: work in any theater of life. What do you got

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Speaker 2: to replace it with? Personal responsibility? If you give up

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Speaker 2: blame and replace it with personal responsibility, you can quickly

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Speaker 2: move out of victim into the achiever world and it's

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Speaker 2: a far better place to be.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but I'm like in a workshop. I'm I'm in

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Speaker 1: a workshop. I'm taking notes like a fucking like a

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Speaker 1: UNI student over here. I forgot, I'm in a podcast.

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Speaker 1: I'm just taking notes.

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Speaker 2: Every day in school day you said that great.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this is great, dude, this is great, bro, keep going.

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Speaker 1: I'm fucking I'm drinking coffee, I'm taking notes. I feel

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Speaker 1: like I'm in a tutorial. I forgot I'm hosting a podcast.

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Speaker 1: I just want to add value.

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Speaker 2: So hopefully this will be that inspire or give some

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Speaker 2: framework the people to be able to be useful for them.

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Speaker 2: That's that's my intent.

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Speaker 1: I'm loving it.

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Speaker 2: Yep, buy me to throw me that's the key area.

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Speaker 2: So what do you got to let go of? And

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Speaker 2: some people aren't going to like hearing this. The first

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Speaker 2: thing you let go of and buy me if you

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Speaker 2: want to progress is the need for control. Some people

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Speaker 2: don't like that. Now bear in mind, I didn't say control.

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Speaker 2: I said the need for control. Most people are so

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Speaker 2: fearful behind the veil. They're so desperate to prove to

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Speaker 2: the world they're good enough to get their goals to finally,

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Speaker 2: you know, whatever it is, stop paying rent and buy

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Speaker 2: their home or you know, pay for their kids, ed you,

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Speaker 2: whatever it may be. They're so desperate for that. They

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Speaker 2: are trying to control things they can't control. Yeah, now

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Speaker 2: they're trying to change reality by wrestling with it, and

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Speaker 2: I've got news for you. I give that up a

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Speaker 2: long time ago because the reality is reality. It keeps winning.

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Speaker 2: So giving up the need for control, what do you

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Speaker 2: replaced that with? Trust, faith, a sense of knowing, knowing what.

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Speaker 2: Let's come back to Einstein. He said, the most powerful

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Speaker 2: question you could ask a answer in your lifetime is this,

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Speaker 2: Do I live in a friendly or a hostile universe?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Now, if I say I live in a hostile universe,

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Speaker 2: whereas that everything happens to me, or I'm in buy me,

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Speaker 2: I'm in survival. I'm trying to carve my way out

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Speaker 2: and everybody else is. I'm in competition, right, I'm trying

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Speaker 2: to fight everything else. Yeah, that's living in a hostile universe,

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Speaker 2: and it's bloody exhausting. If you choose to live in

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Speaker 2: a friendly universe, where life happens for you, not to you,

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Speaker 2: where things happen for three is that if this happened,

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Speaker 2: it'll be this or something better. I'm not attached to

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Speaker 2: the outcome. I'm just putting one foot in front of

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Speaker 2: the other with a smile, doing the best I can,

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Speaker 2: leading with my heart, knowing that I'll always be okay

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Speaker 2: at some level, now if you can do that, because

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Speaker 2: what Einstein was actually saying was there is no friendly universe.

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Speaker 2: There is no hostile universe. What he was alluding to

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Speaker 2: was something more powerful, and that is it is a

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Speaker 2: self reflective universe. See, universe doesn't care what you want,

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Speaker 2: doesn't care what you pray for, doesn't care what's on

430
00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:57,400
Speaker 2: your vision board. It cares about who are you showing

431
00:21:57,480 --> 00:22:01,919
Speaker 2: up as? Yeah, and if you can show up in

432
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:06,080
Speaker 2: partnership with a friendly universe, the external world is a mirror.

433
00:22:06,240 --> 00:22:10,520
Speaker 2: It's going to reflect back evidence of your general attitude,

434
00:22:10,840 --> 00:22:12,760
Speaker 2: not your wishes hoax his eyes that your mind's trying

435
00:22:12,760 --> 00:22:15,040
Speaker 2: to cover up your insecurities with. But what are your

436
00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:17,760
Speaker 2: heart and mind actually aligned with that shows up as

437
00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:20,879
Speaker 2: you authentically. So that's really one of the secrets to

438
00:22:20,920 --> 00:22:22,840
Speaker 2: getting into through me is to start learning to trust.

439
00:22:22,840 --> 00:22:25,439
Speaker 2: And one of the best ways to do that stop

440
00:22:25,480 --> 00:22:29,800
Speaker 2: focusing so much on your damn self. Start looking about

441
00:22:29,840 --> 00:22:32,800
Speaker 2: what can I contribute Because the two biggest laws of

442
00:22:32,880 --> 00:22:35,160
Speaker 2: nature and I didn't make these up. Just look out

443
00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:41,880
Speaker 2: of your window, growth and contribution. If we need certainty, security,

444
00:22:42,280 --> 00:22:49,040
Speaker 2: focused on survival, significance, ego, distraction, pleasure, all of that

445
00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:52,920
Speaker 2: are needs of the personality, but growth and contribution and

446
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,560
Speaker 2: needs of the soul. Why do we need to grow

447
00:22:55,640 --> 00:22:58,080
Speaker 2: so that we can contribute? Why do you get into

448
00:22:58,119 --> 00:22:59,960
Speaker 2: personal growth if it's so you can get more stuff,

449
00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:02,399
Speaker 2: don't expect a lot of help from the universe. If

450
00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:04,280
Speaker 2: you're getting into personal worth, so you can become more

451
00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:05,840
Speaker 2: of who you are, so you can find your gifts,

452
00:23:05,880 --> 00:23:08,720
Speaker 2: so you can give it away, expect things to line up.

453
00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:11,959
Speaker 2: So why do so many people, in answer to your

454
00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:15,879
Speaker 2: original question ten minutes ago, why do so many people

455
00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:21,880
Speaker 2: struggle to be externally validated Because they're trying to get

456
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:23,439
Speaker 2: out of it to me, or they're trying to validate

457
00:23:23,480 --> 00:23:26,920
Speaker 2: themselves in buy me, and they've not managed to tune

458
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:28,840
Speaker 2: into a higher part of who they really are that

459
00:23:28,880 --> 00:23:32,320
Speaker 2: doesn't need validation. Oh so you're not six foot three

460
00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:35,600
Speaker 2: in buff Who gives a crap. Whatever hand you got

461
00:23:35,640 --> 00:23:40,800
Speaker 2: dealt with is a hand of unique personal spiritual magnificence.

462
00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:44,680
Speaker 2: When you can look in the mirror and love your uniqueness,

463
00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:46,920
Speaker 2: accept what you perceive to be flaws, what the media

464
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:49,160
Speaker 2: is going to tell you is a flaw. In case

465
00:23:49,200 --> 00:23:53,040
Speaker 2: you buy their shit, then you can start letting go

466
00:23:53,520 --> 00:23:56,639
Speaker 2: of being an unpaid filmmxs during some big budget, commercial

467
00:23:56,840 --> 00:24:00,760
Speaker 2: driven disaster movie and start starring as your own self.

468
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:03,199
Speaker 2: And I'll tell you this right off the front. I've

469
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:06,920
Speaker 2: seen it too many times, Craig, that the people who

470
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:09,960
Speaker 2: love who they are in the mirror, that are sure

471
00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:13,399
Speaker 2: that have been given a body structure that wouldn't appear

472
00:24:13,440 --> 00:24:16,760
Speaker 2: on the front cover of a magazine, but have that spark,

473
00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:20,840
Speaker 2: that inner ever vescence. They are more attractive to more

474
00:24:20,880 --> 00:24:24,400
Speaker 2: people than somebody that's just saved up for their cosmetic surgeries,

475
00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:29,720
Speaker 2: starve themselves to wafness all right, walking around with fake hair,

476
00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:33,239
Speaker 2: fake nails, fake lashes, fake tan. Right, So, and then

477
00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:36,560
Speaker 2: wonder why they can't get an authentic partner. Yeah right,

478
00:24:36,880 --> 00:24:39,439
Speaker 2: Not because they're bad people, because they were sold a

479
00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:41,320
Speaker 2: lie that you're not good enough the way you are,

480
00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:44,359
Speaker 2: And I'm here to tell you are. When you believe

481
00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:46,399
Speaker 2: that as much as you and I believe in them,

482
00:24:46,800 --> 00:24:49,159
Speaker 2: they will make that first step out of that I

483
00:24:49,240 --> 00:24:52,560
Speaker 2: need to buy this, get that own this. Right, They're

484
00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:54,040
Speaker 2: not going to give a crap about how many likes

485
00:24:54,040 --> 00:24:56,200
Speaker 2: they get on anti social media, which is pretty much

486
00:24:56,240 --> 00:24:58,280
Speaker 2: what it's become. They're going to start living for who

487
00:24:58,320 --> 00:25:00,399
Speaker 2: they are and asking better questions.

488
00:25:00,800 --> 00:25:06,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I love it all right. So I don't

489
00:25:06,359 --> 00:25:09,719
Speaker 1: want to open my door on my shit because everyone

490
00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:12,840
Speaker 1: knows all my stuff. But I've probably in my life

491
00:25:12,920 --> 00:25:16,600
Speaker 1: had what I would call but one of a better term,

492
00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:20,879
Speaker 1: three or four or five epiphanies where it's like fucking

493
00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:24,600
Speaker 1: a light went on, like it's like a curtain pulled back,

494
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:28,280
Speaker 1: and I went, ah, like I'm the problem, or ah,

495
00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:31,440
Speaker 1: that's how that works, and I could. I won't bore

496
00:25:31,480 --> 00:25:34,480
Speaker 1: you because it ain't about me. But have you did

497
00:25:34,520 --> 00:25:39,000
Speaker 1: you as a young person, did you have an epiphany?

498
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:41,200
Speaker 1: Have you had an art I'm sure you've had a bunch,

499
00:25:41,280 --> 00:25:44,320
Speaker 1: but tell us about one or two where it's like,

500
00:25:44,440 --> 00:25:46,760
Speaker 1: all of a sudden a light came on and you

501
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:52,400
Speaker 1: recognized or realized something that was life changing.

502
00:25:55,119 --> 00:25:57,080
Speaker 2: Many moments, but I'll share one.

503
00:25:57,359 --> 00:25:58,760
Speaker 1: Yeah.

504
00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:01,439
Speaker 2: I was at an avent for fifteen years. I was

505
00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:04,240
Speaker 2: an experienced trainer with Tony Robbins. So I travel around

506
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:07,879
Speaker 2: the world with Tony doing events and helping people and

507
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:10,720
Speaker 2: interventions and that kind of stuff. But at one time,

508
00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:13,560
Speaker 2: I was always trying to make trainer. Before you become

509
00:26:13,560 --> 00:26:15,760
Speaker 2: a trainer, you're kind of on the leadership team kind

510
00:26:15,800 --> 00:26:18,359
Speaker 2: of an apprentice. My goal was to try to be

511
00:26:18,400 --> 00:26:20,560
Speaker 2: a trainer, which by definition means you never will be

512
00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:23,280
Speaker 2: because you haven't already owned the identity of a trainer.

513
00:26:23,400 --> 00:26:23,560
Speaker 3: Right.

514
00:26:24,280 --> 00:26:26,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, So I want to be an entrepreneur. It means

515
00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:28,560
Speaker 2: you never will be right because you're always trying to

516
00:26:28,560 --> 00:26:30,560
Speaker 2: be something, which means you can never step in. I

517
00:26:30,600 --> 00:26:32,360
Speaker 2: am an entrepreneur. It means I'm now going to start

518
00:26:32,400 --> 00:26:35,400
Speaker 2: looking for opportunities. I want to be an entrepreneur means

519
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:38,320
Speaker 2: I need a business to validate myself. Anyway, So it

520
00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:43,920
Speaker 2: was a side but I had this epiphany that absolutely

521
00:26:43,960 --> 00:26:48,879
Speaker 2: shook me to my core because it was when I

522
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:53,000
Speaker 2: realized that every time I thought about something in my past,

523
00:26:53,800 --> 00:27:00,000
Speaker 2: a scenario, a scene, any memory, I always saw myself

524
00:27:01,320 --> 00:27:06,400
Speaker 2: in the scene. Now that clearly isn't a memory because

525
00:27:06,440 --> 00:27:09,240
Speaker 2: I wasn't outside of myself capturing that memory. It was

526
00:27:09,280 --> 00:27:15,720
Speaker 2: a construct. Wow, which meant that even subconsciously, I was

527
00:27:15,880 --> 00:27:21,160
Speaker 2: always looking through the lens of how do people see me? Yeah,

528
00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:23,000
Speaker 2: to the point where I didn't even own my own

529
00:27:23,040 --> 00:27:24,480
Speaker 2: memories anymore. I made them up.

530
00:27:25,400 --> 00:27:26,720
Speaker 1: Wow. Wow.

531
00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:29,440
Speaker 2: I was never fully associated. I never remembered something through

532
00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:31,359
Speaker 2: my own eyes. I always remembered it as a scene

533
00:27:31,359 --> 00:27:35,280
Speaker 2: with me in it, and that was like, what the

534
00:27:35,280 --> 00:27:38,240
Speaker 2: hell has my life become trying to chase what I

535
00:27:38,320 --> 00:27:45,199
Speaker 2: call goop? Goop the good opinion of other people. Wow,

536
00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:50,040
Speaker 2: And if you spend your life swimming in this sticky, nasty, smelly,

537
00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:53,879
Speaker 2: potential sucking substance called goop, you are never going to

538
00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:57,320
Speaker 2: do anything other than play I'm a victim or I've

539
00:27:57,320 --> 00:27:59,080
Speaker 2: got to try harder to try to get more of

540
00:27:59,080 --> 00:27:59,920
Speaker 2: the same fee.

541
00:28:01,040 --> 00:28:01,280
Speaker 3: Yeah.

542
00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:03,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, And that was a big ones like whoa what?

543
00:28:03,960 --> 00:28:07,560
Speaker 2: Why am I so obsessed? Why have I consciously unconsciously

544
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:10,600
Speaker 2: created my entire life through What do I think other

545
00:28:10,640 --> 00:28:14,199
Speaker 2: people think of me? As I said earlier, Yeah, the

546
00:28:14,240 --> 00:28:16,840
Speaker 2: reality is this. In fact, I'm gonna I'm gonna give

547
00:28:16,840 --> 00:28:17,879
Speaker 2: you a metaphor here that I think is going to

548
00:28:17,920 --> 00:28:19,560
Speaker 2: help a lot of people who if they resonate with

549
00:28:19,600 --> 00:28:24,040
Speaker 2: suffering from goop at some degree. Yes, we all star

550
00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:27,000
Speaker 2: in a movie I've alluded to that right, called the

551
00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:30,399
Speaker 2: movie of our Life. Now I know, Craig, that you

552
00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:32,040
Speaker 2: star in the movie of your life. How do I

553
00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:34,400
Speaker 2: know that? Because you're the only one that's in every

554
00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:38,320
Speaker 2: single scene of your movie. Yeah, right, so you're the star.

555
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:42,080
Speaker 2: There's no co stars. There are two other types of

556
00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:45,840
Speaker 2: people in your movie. At best. There may be a

557
00:28:45,920 --> 00:28:52,960
Speaker 2: supporting cast, sibling, spouse, best friend, partner, whatever. Yep, But

558
00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:56,400
Speaker 2: the vast majority, ninety nine percent plus of people in

559
00:28:56,400 --> 00:29:00,239
Speaker 2: your movie are nothing more than film extras in your movie. Now,

560
00:29:00,280 --> 00:29:03,200
Speaker 2: that's not being disparaging. There's a clarification there. What do

561
00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:06,680
Speaker 2: I mean by filmmaker? Pretty easy? People you're no longer

562
00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:09,920
Speaker 2: thinking about, when they're no longer in your current scene.

563
00:29:10,040 --> 00:29:12,280
Speaker 1: You're right with me. Yeah.

564
00:29:12,320 --> 00:29:15,560
Speaker 2: So here's the thing. Because we walk around as the

565
00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:20,640
Speaker 2: star of our movie, we think everybody else sees us

566
00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:24,240
Speaker 2: as the star of our movie. Yeah, but of course

567
00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:26,760
Speaker 2: they don't because they're not starring in our movie. Whose

568
00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:27,680
Speaker 2: movie are they starring in?

569
00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:30,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're right, yea.

570
00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:33,720
Speaker 2: Our own, which means, by definition, we play one of

571
00:29:33,760 --> 00:29:36,600
Speaker 2: two roles in everyone else's movie at best. For a

572
00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:38,840
Speaker 2: handful of people on what you could count on one hand,

573
00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:43,040
Speaker 2: we are a supporting cast. But the vast majority of

574
00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:46,320
Speaker 2: people in our movie, Craig, specifically, the ones that most

575
00:29:46,320 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 2: people invest their energy trying to impress, trying to get

576
00:29:49,120 --> 00:29:51,840
Speaker 2: approval from, trying to be getting a good opinion from

577
00:29:52,200 --> 00:29:55,320
Speaker 2: are nothing more than you know, film mixtures in our movie,

578
00:29:55,360 --> 00:29:57,600
Speaker 2: and we are film extuers in their movie. What does

579
00:29:57,640 --> 00:30:00,400
Speaker 2: that actually mean? You want to tattoo this on inside

580
00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:04,400
Speaker 2: of your eyelids. Most people don't care enough about you

581
00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:07,440
Speaker 2: to bother to give an opinion. Why because they're too

582
00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:11,480
Speaker 2: busy being worried about what they think you're thinking of them.

583
00:30:12,120 --> 00:30:12,360
Speaker 1: Wow.

584
00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:16,560
Speaker 2: Wow, everybody's walking around in their own bubble of self

585
00:30:16,600 --> 00:30:18,840
Speaker 2: importance thinking I wonder what they're thinking of me in

586
00:30:18,880 --> 00:30:21,240
Speaker 2: my bubble of self importance. When they're not because they're thinking,

587
00:30:21,360 --> 00:30:23,120
Speaker 2: I wonder what they're thinking of me in my bubble

588
00:30:23,160 --> 00:30:25,640
Speaker 2: of self importance. And when you burst that bubble, you

589
00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:26,800
Speaker 2: can step into your power.

590
00:30:27,520 --> 00:30:32,760
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, I'm going to tell you something funny. So

591
00:30:33,760 --> 00:30:36,520
Speaker 1: I love this and I don't disagree with anything you're saying.

592
00:30:38,120 --> 00:30:42,600
Speaker 1: So my PhD is in goop, like my literal research.

593
00:30:42,680 --> 00:30:46,440
Speaker 1: My literal research is in a thing called metaperception and

594
00:30:46,480 --> 00:30:50,560
Speaker 1: meta accuracy. But let me draw the draw the line

595
00:30:50,560 --> 00:30:54,080
Speaker 1: in the sand. So what you're speaking about, I think,

596
00:30:55,240 --> 00:30:58,400
Speaker 1: is the not very healthy habit of worrying, worrying about

597
00:30:58,400 --> 00:31:00,520
Speaker 1: what people think of us, whether or not they like

598
00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:03,120
Speaker 1: us all that stuff, right, and then trying to keep

599
00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:07,320
Speaker 1: them happy. And my PhD is in a thing called,

600
00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:11,680
Speaker 1: like I said, metaperception, which is having an awareness of

601
00:31:11,760 --> 00:31:15,520
Speaker 1: how you are perceived and processed and experienced by other people,

602
00:31:16,240 --> 00:31:20,680
Speaker 1: so that like, for example, it's important that I try

603
00:31:20,720 --> 00:31:25,800
Speaker 1: to understand the reality, the personal reality and thinking and

604
00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:28,760
Speaker 1: mindset of Peter Sage, so I can have a good

605
00:31:28,840 --> 00:31:31,440
Speaker 1: chat with you. We call that theory of mind. Is

606
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:34,360
Speaker 1: my ability to understand how you think. You and I

607
00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:36,479
Speaker 1: are in the same conversation right now, but you and

608
00:31:36,520 --> 00:31:39,280
Speaker 1: I are not in the same experience. So it's in

609
00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:42,840
Speaker 1: my interest to try to understand your version of reality

610
00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:46,720
Speaker 1: right now, not agree, not disagree, not fucking value it,

611
00:31:47,240 --> 00:31:51,280
Speaker 1: just go ah. And then, even more importantly me as

612
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:55,160
Speaker 1: a professional presenter, speaker all that bullshit, just like you,

613
00:31:56,080 --> 00:31:59,480
Speaker 1: it's in my interest to know what the Craig experience

614
00:31:59,560 --> 00:32:03,280
Speaker 1: is like my audience. Now, if I think I'm fucking

615
00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:07,640
Speaker 1: riveting and fascinating and engaging and they think I'm fucking

616
00:32:07,760 --> 00:32:11,840
Speaker 1: mindlessly boring, and I don't know, I'm in trouble, right,

617
00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:17,640
Speaker 1: So that's the differentiation. But you are exactly on the

618
00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:22,760
Speaker 1: money like that the whole the goop acronym. I love it.

619
00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:25,280
Speaker 1: But it is so funny. As you're talking about that,

620
00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:29,240
Speaker 1: I could hear some of my listeners going, hey, that's

621
00:32:29,280 --> 00:32:32,720
Speaker 1: not what you say, but it is what I say,

622
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:35,880
Speaker 1: because we're talking about different things. But that is a

623
00:32:36,400 --> 00:32:39,880
Speaker 1: that is a really interesting kind of and it's funny

624
00:32:39,880 --> 00:32:44,960
Speaker 1: that you have just explained in very relatable, easy to

625
00:32:45,120 --> 00:32:51,800
Speaker 1: understand terms, something that a lot of people with respect

626
00:32:51,920 --> 00:32:55,080
Speaker 1: who have spent decades studying the fucking human brain and

627
00:32:55,120 --> 00:33:00,280
Speaker 1: mind and social psychology and behavioral psychology can't really articulate that. Well,

628
00:33:00,440 --> 00:33:03,160
Speaker 1: So well done. I love it.

629
00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:07,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you, No, I appreciate that. And you know,

630
00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:09,200
Speaker 2: people say, well, where do you go from that? Because

631
00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:13,320
Speaker 2: the revelation itself awareness is the first step right to

632
00:33:13,640 --> 00:33:17,280
Speaker 2: break in those changes. But I say to people, so

633
00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:20,600
Speaker 2: many people are running around seeking that validation, that external

634
00:33:21,560 --> 00:33:23,640
Speaker 2: ballet like a begging ball, hoping to get some love

635
00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:26,320
Speaker 2: points dropped in it, some validation points dropped in it,

636
00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:28,800
Speaker 2: some approval points dropped in it. Right, And of course

637
00:33:28,880 --> 00:33:31,960
Speaker 2: it's like food, right, once you have some, you're full

638
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:34,120
Speaker 2: for a while, but soon after you're going to get hungry.

639
00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:37,440
Speaker 2: Because it's never a long term solution. It's like motivation.

640
00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:40,400
Speaker 2: You always need motivation. Inspiration is the nuclear fusion of

641
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:42,760
Speaker 2: the human soul. You don't need motivating if you're inspired.

642
00:33:43,680 --> 00:33:45,920
Speaker 2: It's two different fuel sources. So how do you how

643
00:33:45,960 --> 00:33:49,520
Speaker 2: do you get out of that external requirement for constantly

644
00:33:49,600 --> 00:33:53,280
Speaker 2: needing valet It's because no amount of compliments, no amount

645
00:33:53,320 --> 00:33:55,760
Speaker 2: of tends on a feedback form from the audience, no

646
00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:58,320
Speaker 2: amount of pat on the back is going to last

647
00:33:58,360 --> 00:34:00,960
Speaker 2: long term. If the pattern that you're looking to try

648
00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:09,800
Speaker 2: to complete is based upon internal insecurities, using external validation

649
00:34:09,880 --> 00:34:13,040
Speaker 2: to solve it, it's just never gonna happen. Right again,

650
00:34:13,080 --> 00:34:17,160
Speaker 2: running east looking for a sunset? So yeah, how do

651
00:34:17,200 --> 00:34:19,880
Speaker 2: you look at you recognize most people out there in

652
00:34:19,920 --> 00:34:22,080
Speaker 2: the world are holding that begging ball to some degree.

653
00:34:23,719 --> 00:34:29,200
Speaker 2: So how do you get out of that trap? Pretty simple?

654
00:34:30,080 --> 00:34:32,800
Speaker 2: You shift the focus one hundred and eighty degrees. Instead

655
00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:36,879
Speaker 2: of saying how can I get significance, You're start saying

656
00:34:36,920 --> 00:34:40,719
Speaker 2: how can I raise the significance of others? Not from

657
00:34:40,719 --> 00:34:43,960
Speaker 2: a horse trade level of transaction, hoping, oh if I

658
00:34:44,040 --> 00:34:46,360
Speaker 2: give you some feedback, and then I'm fishing for compliments

659
00:34:46,400 --> 00:34:48,600
Speaker 2: to get some for myself. That's bullshit. That doesn't work.

660
00:34:48,719 --> 00:34:51,520
Speaker 2: Universe doesn't hear that. But how can I shift my focus?

661
00:34:51,640 --> 00:34:54,080
Speaker 2: You look at people like Gandhi, like Mother Teresa, like

662
00:34:54,200 --> 00:34:56,560
Speaker 2: Nelson Mandela. Yeah, I've got them on the wall behind me.

663
00:34:57,400 --> 00:35:00,480
Speaker 2: What was their energy when they walked into room. They

664
00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:03,319
Speaker 2: didn't say look at me, they didn't say please notice me.

665
00:35:03,840 --> 00:35:06,920
Speaker 2: They looked at people, and they made those other people

666
00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:09,640
Speaker 2: feel like the star of their own movie. And if

667
00:35:09,640 --> 00:35:12,239
Speaker 2: you do that, I got news for you. They're gonna

668
00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:14,560
Speaker 2: light you up like the star of yours. You don't

669
00:35:14,600 --> 00:35:19,080
Speaker 2: need to seek validation, you get it by osmosis. Yeah,

670
00:35:19,120 --> 00:35:21,400
Speaker 2: and I can give you another example. As a speaker

671
00:35:22,200 --> 00:35:24,840
Speaker 2: in my early days, that's what I needed. I needed validation.

672
00:35:25,360 --> 00:35:26,279
Speaker 1: Yeah right.

673
00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:28,839
Speaker 2: I was looking at the feedback forms and thinking, well,

674
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:31,680
Speaker 2: you know, you could get nine tens and then one

675
00:35:31,719 --> 00:35:34,000
Speaker 2: person give you a two with some nasty comments and

676
00:35:34,040 --> 00:35:35,080
Speaker 2: it put you off for the day.

677
00:35:35,200 --> 00:35:35,359
Speaker 1: Right.

678
00:35:36,320 --> 00:35:39,319
Speaker 2: And my intention going on stage was how can I

679
00:35:39,360 --> 00:35:41,799
Speaker 2: get a good score? Because I thought that's how I

680
00:35:41,920 --> 00:35:44,920
Speaker 2: validated myself and so many people out there. How can

681
00:35:44,960 --> 00:35:47,600
Speaker 2: I get a good score? How can I get more friends?

682
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:49,279
Speaker 2: How can I get more likes on my post? When

683
00:35:49,280 --> 00:35:51,920
Speaker 2: I show people my feet or my breakfast or some bullshit? Right,

684
00:35:52,160 --> 00:35:53,200
Speaker 2: how can I you know.

685
00:35:53,600 --> 00:35:56,759
Speaker 1: Please don't showish your fucking fate, please you.

686
00:35:56,719 --> 00:36:00,560
Speaker 2: Know what I mean? Right? Weird? How can I please

687
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:04,160
Speaker 2: mum and dad by getting the right career whatever? You

688
00:36:04,480 --> 00:36:10,800
Speaker 2: pick a fricking man. So instead of doing that, instead

689
00:36:10,840 --> 00:36:15,240
Speaker 2: of playing the game of how can I get validation,

690
00:36:16,320 --> 00:36:20,440
Speaker 2: you turn around say how can I validate others? How

691
00:36:20,480 --> 00:36:22,160
Speaker 2: can I make people? How can I put a smile

692
00:36:22,200 --> 00:36:24,160
Speaker 2: on somebody? So? How can I make people feel more

693
00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:26,279
Speaker 2: than rather than less than? Because they cross my path?

694
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:29,680
Speaker 2: And if you switch your focus there and just play

695
00:36:29,719 --> 00:36:32,920
Speaker 2: the game of raising the significance of others, not to

696
00:36:32,960 --> 00:36:36,400
Speaker 2: score points, but because it feels good, you will start

697
00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:39,320
Speaker 2: letting go of your own insecurities. You won't need validation

698
00:36:39,440 --> 00:36:42,040
Speaker 2: and low and behold. People will actually start treating you

699
00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:47,520
Speaker 2: as some sort of person that validates your own internal

700
00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:50,960
Speaker 2: insecurities as no longer being there. Why because you now

701
00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:54,400
Speaker 2: have something that they want, So rather than going hunting

702
00:36:54,440 --> 00:36:57,560
Speaker 2: for significance, you get it by osmosis. So when I

703
00:36:57,600 --> 00:37:01,160
Speaker 2: made the switch, I got on stage and this was

704
00:37:01,239 --> 00:37:04,520
Speaker 2: like magic. Instead of caring about what was on the

705
00:37:04,560 --> 00:37:07,839
Speaker 2: feedback form, My intention was, I don't care if these

706
00:37:07,840 --> 00:37:10,120
Speaker 2: people know my name. I don't care if they like me.

707
00:37:10,280 --> 00:37:12,520
Speaker 2: I'm here to add value. I'm here to serve. And

708
00:37:12,560 --> 00:37:14,120
Speaker 2: if that means some of them need to hear something

709
00:37:14,120 --> 00:37:16,280
Speaker 2: they don't like because it brushes up against their ego,

710
00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:18,960
Speaker 2: but it's what they need to hear from my perspective

711
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:20,879
Speaker 2: of adding value. And I think it's true in my heart,

712
00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:22,239
Speaker 2: I would fucking say it.

713
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:23,319
Speaker 1: Yeah all right.

714
00:37:23,320 --> 00:37:25,000
Speaker 2: And if that means some people give me a one,

715
00:37:25,680 --> 00:37:26,840
Speaker 2: it's they're on their journey.

716
00:37:27,360 --> 00:37:28,319
Speaker 1: Yeah right.

717
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:31,120
Speaker 2: And I learned a powerful lesson. And there's a speaker

718
00:37:31,160 --> 00:37:33,560
Speaker 2: I'll share this with you, Craig and any other speakers listening.

719
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:36,319
Speaker 2: It's from a guy called Doug Stephenson who I learned

720
00:37:36,320 --> 00:37:38,360
Speaker 2: this from twenty years ago when I lived in Canada,

721
00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:42,080
Speaker 2: in Vancouver, Beautiful Soul. And he told me what I

722
00:37:42,080 --> 00:37:45,360
Speaker 2: call the rule of fifty and he says, people usually

723
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:48,279
Speaker 2: have to hear something at epiphany level that has the

724
00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:53,040
Speaker 2: epiphany potential fifty times before it hits fifty times before

725
00:37:53,080 --> 00:37:55,960
Speaker 2: it's sink, right, he says, So when I go on stage,

726
00:37:57,520 --> 00:38:00,440
Speaker 2: he said, everybody is at a certain number. Some are

727
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:03,479
Speaker 2: at six, some are at thirty, some are at twenty seven,

728
00:38:03,520 --> 00:38:05,920
Speaker 2: some are at forty three. My job is to go

729
00:38:06,040 --> 00:38:11,879
Speaker 2: out and move everybody up one, it says, And some

730
00:38:11,920 --> 00:38:14,719
Speaker 2: are going to say I don't mean anything. Why because

731
00:38:14,719 --> 00:38:17,759
Speaker 2: you move them from six to seven. But some few

732
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:20,480
Speaker 2: people in that audience are at forty nine and you

733
00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:23,000
Speaker 2: get to touch them in that level of epiphany. Not

734
00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:25,120
Speaker 2: because you're smart, because you're great, or it's got anything

735
00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:27,440
Speaker 2: to do with you, but because you were blessed enough

736
00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:30,280
Speaker 2: to ride on the shoulders of the forty nine people

737
00:38:30,280 --> 00:38:34,000
Speaker 2: that went before you. Yeah, and when you hold that

738
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:37,359
Speaker 2: as an intention, you go out, tell me where goop

739
00:38:37,440 --> 00:38:39,920
Speaker 2: exists in that Tell me where I need to validate

740
00:38:39,960 --> 00:38:42,160
Speaker 2: myself off a feedback form for their No, you're doing

741
00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:44,360
Speaker 2: God's work at a level where your job is to

742
00:38:44,440 --> 00:38:47,200
Speaker 2: raise everybody by one, and hopefully so some seeds that

743
00:38:47,760 --> 00:38:51,120
Speaker 2: a generation downstream, somebody else gets to go on stage

744
00:38:51,120 --> 00:38:53,080
Speaker 2: and touch somebody's life because you move them from six

745
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:54,640
Speaker 2: to seven and they're now at forty nine and they

746
00:38:54,680 --> 00:38:55,480
Speaker 2: get to hit the fifty.

747
00:38:56,040 --> 00:38:58,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that. I want to tell you a

748
00:38:58,400 --> 00:39:01,839
Speaker 1: quick story and then if you've had a similar experience,

749
00:39:01,880 --> 00:39:06,719
Speaker 1: So one of my mates probably maybe nearly twenty years ago,

750
00:39:06,840 --> 00:39:11,320
Speaker 1: Peter was raving about we used to train together, and

751
00:39:11,360 --> 00:39:14,040
Speaker 1: he was raving about this book called The Power of

752
00:39:14,080 --> 00:39:16,360
Speaker 1: Now in this bloke called eck Cart totally right, and

753
00:39:16,360 --> 00:39:19,760
Speaker 1: I'm like, fuck, eh Cart, totally fuck the Power Now.

754
00:39:20,160 --> 00:39:22,040
Speaker 1: And he's like, you've got to read Yeah, You've got

755
00:39:22,080 --> 00:39:24,680
Speaker 1: to read this book. I'm like, yeah, I got like

756
00:39:24,960 --> 00:39:27,200
Speaker 1: I had a shit attitude, by the way. By the way,

757
00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:30,360
Speaker 1: I went to see Tony Robbins to shit Attitude and

758
00:39:30,880 --> 00:39:33,840
Speaker 1: I loved him. Right, So I get The Power of

759
00:39:33,960 --> 00:39:37,319
Speaker 1: Now and I read it. I read about but grudgingly

760
00:39:37,520 --> 00:39:41,600
Speaker 1: with the worst attitude in the world. I read twenty

761
00:39:41,680 --> 00:39:45,399
Speaker 1: pages and I'm like, my thoughts are I'm going to say,

762
00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:49,440
Speaker 1: my thoughts are maybe ten right, my thoughts are confirmed.

763
00:39:49,440 --> 00:39:55,120
Speaker 1: This is shit. This is shit. Anyway about oh, probably

764
00:39:55,160 --> 00:40:00,319
Speaker 1: a decade later, so maybe ten years ago, I just

765
00:40:00,840 --> 00:40:02,400
Speaker 1: I don't know, I was cleaning up some shit or

766
00:40:02,400 --> 00:40:04,080
Speaker 1: something and I went, oh, this is that book that

767
00:40:04,280 --> 00:40:07,720
Speaker 1: Matt gave me that. I'm like, maybe it was fifteen

768
00:40:07,719 --> 00:40:10,279
Speaker 1: maybe it was five years later, So fifteen years ago,

769
00:40:10,360 --> 00:40:12,240
Speaker 1: because I feel like I've been a bit more enlightened

770
00:40:12,280 --> 00:40:15,319
Speaker 1: for longer. But anyway, I read it, and obviously I'm like, oh,

771
00:40:15,360 --> 00:40:17,759
Speaker 1: this is fucking this is genius. How long has this

772
00:40:17,840 --> 00:40:20,000
Speaker 1: been going on? Houses? What do you mean I'm the

773
00:40:20,040 --> 00:40:22,440
Speaker 1: observer of my thoughts? What do you mean I'm the

774
00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:24,560
Speaker 1: you know, the conduit to that that is, you know,

775
00:40:24,600 --> 00:40:27,880
Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh my god. But it's so funny that,

776
00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:30,680
Speaker 1: you know, when the student's already kind of vibe and

777
00:40:31,239 --> 00:40:34,480
Speaker 1: I read the exact same thing, and it was like

778
00:40:34,680 --> 00:40:38,040
Speaker 1: I'd never seen it before. It was like somebody pulled

779
00:40:38,080 --> 00:40:43,960
Speaker 1: back a curtain on this fucking magical gift. But I'd

780
00:40:44,000 --> 00:40:46,280
Speaker 1: seen the same thing, and I thought, oh, it's funny

781
00:40:46,320 --> 00:40:49,880
Speaker 1: how much that's changed over the years, you know. And

782
00:40:49,960 --> 00:40:53,520
Speaker 1: obviously nothing had changed except me. But have you ever

783
00:40:53,560 --> 00:40:57,400
Speaker 1: had an experience like that where where all of a sudden,

784
00:40:57,520 --> 00:41:00,400
Speaker 1: something that you didn't get you is prof found.

785
00:41:01,680 --> 00:41:04,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, one specific book, but I'll give you a metaphor

786
00:41:04,760 --> 00:41:08,760
Speaker 2: to try to encapsulate it with as well. Yeah. See,

787
00:41:08,960 --> 00:41:11,839
Speaker 2: I mentioned earlier that biological maturity isn't the choice, it's

788
00:41:11,880 --> 00:41:14,759
Speaker 2: part of the rule set, but emotional maturity is. And

789
00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:18,640
Speaker 2: we're all progressing at different levels of emotional maturity. There's

790
00:41:18,680 --> 00:41:21,799
Speaker 2: a lot of pretty old I can I say, oh,

791
00:41:22,040 --> 00:41:25,239
Speaker 2: let's say old bodies running around as emotional teenagers. I

792
00:41:25,239 --> 00:41:27,200
Speaker 2: think we've met some of those and been them at

793
00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:31,960
Speaker 2: some point. But imagine that the levels of consciousness are

794
00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:34,960
Speaker 2: kind of like a mountain. The top of the mountain,

795
00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:37,319
Speaker 2: you've got your enlightenment. Yah, bottom of the mound, you've

796
00:41:37,320 --> 00:41:41,760
Speaker 2: got your victimhood. And if you're halfway up the mountain

797
00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:44,919
Speaker 2: and you turn around to somebody and say, wow, look

798
00:41:44,960 --> 00:41:47,759
Speaker 2: at the sunset and they're at the bottom of that,

799
00:41:47,920 --> 00:41:49,279
Speaker 2: or they're in a valley and all they can see

800
00:41:49,320 --> 00:41:52,560
Speaker 2: is trees, they're going to think you're follow shit. There

801
00:41:52,600 --> 00:41:55,600
Speaker 2: is no sunset, you idiot. I can't see it because

802
00:41:55,640 --> 00:41:57,680
Speaker 2: therefore it doesn't exist in my world. You say no,

803
00:41:57,719 --> 00:41:59,719
Speaker 2: but you don't get it. There's the sun. Come have

804
00:41:59,760 --> 00:42:02,319
Speaker 2: a lot. Now, I don't get it. What is this

805
00:42:02,440 --> 00:42:05,279
Speaker 2: pain body thing? Right? What is this like? You know,

806
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:07,640
Speaker 2: being this? What is this sense of rigging? Observe? I

807
00:42:07,640 --> 00:42:10,080
Speaker 2: am the witness to my own Yeah whatever, I'm busy

808
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:16,680
Speaker 2: being busy, right, And only when somebody is at the

809
00:42:16,760 --> 00:42:20,360
Speaker 2: level of the mountain that they are open enough to

810
00:42:20,480 --> 00:42:23,000
Speaker 2: receive the view from where they're at. There's nothing wrong

811
00:42:23,040 --> 00:42:26,160
Speaker 2: with people in the valley struggling, say, what's all this

812
00:42:26,200 --> 00:42:30,080
Speaker 2: personal growth bullshit? It's you can only be open to

813
00:42:30,320 --> 00:42:32,640
Speaker 2: receive the information based upon the level of the mountain

814
00:42:32,640 --> 00:42:35,920
Speaker 2: you're at. It's it's it's it's obvious. Yeah, and when

815
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:40,080
Speaker 2: if you go back to the biblical teachings, if Jesus

816
00:42:40,320 --> 00:42:43,440
Speaker 2: is teaching something from his level of consciousness, it can

817
00:42:43,480 --> 00:42:47,279
Speaker 2: only be interpreted from lower levels of consciousness. If he

818
00:42:47,320 --> 00:42:50,399
Speaker 2: says turn the other cheek. If you're in victim, you're

819
00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:53,360
Speaker 2: going to see that as being able to be dominated.

820
00:42:54,719 --> 00:42:58,400
Speaker 2: If you're in warrior mode or achiever mode, you're going

821
00:42:58,440 --> 00:43:00,520
Speaker 2: to see that as acquiescing to the enemy and you're

822
00:43:00,520 --> 00:43:04,200
Speaker 2: going to resist. If you're enlightened, you're going to see

823
00:43:04,200 --> 00:43:06,040
Speaker 2: that as a strength beyond a strength because you can't

824
00:43:06,080 --> 00:43:10,239
Speaker 2: be pushed, pauled, controlled, cajoled by external forces. It doesn't

825
00:43:10,239 --> 00:43:12,120
Speaker 2: affect you. Turn the other cheek. Is that all you got?

826
00:43:12,120 --> 00:43:16,280
Speaker 2: It's like, I'm not playing the game, I'm not engaging

827
00:43:16,280 --> 00:43:18,880
Speaker 2: in the battle with you, right, So yeah, there is that.

828
00:43:18,920 --> 00:43:20,680
Speaker 2: And it happened to me with one book which has

829
00:43:21,000 --> 00:43:24,680
Speaker 2: probably been more responsible for changing my life, similar to

830
00:43:24,760 --> 00:43:28,319
Speaker 2: Power of you know now, impact your Jaws and that

831
00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:32,319
Speaker 2: is Power Versus Forced by David Hawkins. And I had

832
00:43:32,880 --> 00:43:36,960
Speaker 2: an amazing friend gentleman called David Becker, not David Beckham,

833
00:43:37,160 --> 00:43:37,960
Speaker 2: but David Becker.

834
00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:41,439
Speaker 1: And who's just who's the author again? Mite?

835
00:43:41,480 --> 00:43:46,319
Speaker 2: Sorry, David Hawkins, the late greats Okay, Power Versus Force.

836
00:43:46,760 --> 00:43:49,680
Speaker 2: I read that book because David gave it to me.

837
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:52,719
Speaker 2: David is an amazing, beautiful, enlightened soul. He inspired me

838
00:43:52,800 --> 00:43:55,480
Speaker 2: to run the marathon they sab twenty years ago. It's

839
00:43:55,560 --> 00:44:00,120
Speaker 2: just a one of these enlightened and beautiful men. And

840
00:44:00,480 --> 00:44:02,160
Speaker 2: he said that this book had helped change his life.

841
00:44:02,200 --> 00:44:04,040
Speaker 2: So I wanted to read it. But twenty odd years

842
00:44:04,040 --> 00:44:08,480
Speaker 2: ago I was still pretty much buy me mode, and

843
00:44:09,640 --> 00:44:12,040
Speaker 2: I read it. The first third of the book is

844
00:44:12,080 --> 00:44:16,319
Speaker 2: a little heavy. It's kind of chaos theory, quantum mechanics,

845
00:44:16,360 --> 00:44:21,640
Speaker 2: nonlinear dynamics, kinesilgi bit right. It was like you with pain,

846
00:44:21,719 --> 00:44:27,640
Speaker 2: body being this of witness consciousness whatever. Right, couldn't get

847
00:44:27,640 --> 00:44:31,760
Speaker 2: through it too tough. Ten years later, it's actually probably

848
00:44:31,760 --> 00:44:35,279
Speaker 2: twenty five years ago. So fifteen years ago I picked

849
00:44:35,280 --> 00:44:38,359
Speaker 2: it up and read it changed my life, made all

850
00:44:38,440 --> 00:44:43,040
Speaker 2: of the pieces fit into place of understanding other people

851
00:44:43,680 --> 00:44:47,640
Speaker 2: understanding why the World's where it's at. It absolutely blew

852
00:44:47,680 --> 00:44:54,000
Speaker 2: me away of how genius and poetic the model was

853
00:44:54,840 --> 00:44:57,279
Speaker 2: and how much it closed the loop on so many

854
00:44:57,320 --> 00:45:00,920
Speaker 2: questions I had. So yeah, power Versus Force and it

855
00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:02,759
Speaker 2: was part of a trilogy. There was two others, which

856
00:45:02,760 --> 00:45:05,120
Speaker 2: are if you're not at certain levels of the mountain,

857
00:45:05,160 --> 00:45:06,279
Speaker 2: you're just going to want to color it in.

858
00:45:07,480 --> 00:45:13,520
Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, a little heavy, but but yeah, Power versus

859
00:45:13,560 --> 00:45:18,360
Speaker 3: Force is definitely my power of now in your story.

860
00:45:18,880 --> 00:45:20,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm loving it. I'm looking at it right now.

861
00:45:20,760 --> 00:45:27,319
Speaker 1: So power versus Force. Everyone the hidden determinants of human behavior, David.

862
00:45:27,280 --> 00:45:29,880
Speaker 2: Game change are great questions.

863
00:45:29,920 --> 00:45:30,440
Speaker 3: Just order it.

864
00:45:31,080 --> 00:45:32,360
Speaker 1: I'm going to Yeah, no, I'm going to get it.

865
00:45:32,440 --> 00:45:33,880
Speaker 1: I'm going to buy it when we get off this

866
00:45:35,120 --> 00:45:38,239
Speaker 1: when we get off this call. All right, So a

867
00:45:38,280 --> 00:45:41,320
Speaker 1: couple of things. What do we got We've got maybe

868
00:45:41,400 --> 00:45:43,640
Speaker 1: ten minutes if that's you still got ten minutes.

869
00:45:43,400 --> 00:45:44,879
Speaker 2: Mate, I'm with you.

870
00:45:45,360 --> 00:45:47,400
Speaker 1: When you're a kid, what did you think you were

871
00:45:47,440 --> 00:45:50,840
Speaker 1: going to be when you were ten, twelve, fourteen?

872
00:45:51,560 --> 00:45:52,720
Speaker 2: What did you think you were.

873
00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:55,120
Speaker 1: Going to be or did you just did you did

874
00:45:55,320 --> 00:46:02,279
Speaker 1: not think like that? I don't know what career did

875
00:46:02,320 --> 00:46:05,400
Speaker 1: you think you were going to have profound experience.

876
00:46:05,440 --> 00:46:08,759
Speaker 2: At ten years old, I was in the playground and

877
00:46:08,800 --> 00:46:13,520
Speaker 2: there was a series on television called The Paras by

878
00:46:13,719 --> 00:46:17,240
Speaker 2: Frank Hilton that followed for a Oplatoon on their journey

879
00:46:17,239 --> 00:46:22,160
Speaker 2: from recruits to the Falklands. And I was in the

880
00:46:22,160 --> 00:46:24,160
Speaker 2: playground and we're talking. We'd watch it, our parents had

881
00:46:24,200 --> 00:46:25,560
Speaker 2: it on that night whatever, and a couple of us

882
00:46:25,560 --> 00:46:28,279
Speaker 2: are talking about it. And there's a guy never seen

883
00:46:28,320 --> 00:46:30,480
Speaker 2: him since I was ten, probably doesn't even know what

884
00:46:30,520 --> 00:46:34,480
Speaker 2: impact he had, but he mentioned something that changed my life.

885
00:46:34,680 --> 00:46:38,640
Speaker 2: He said, yeah, he said, my life ambition is to

886
00:46:38,680 --> 00:46:40,000
Speaker 2: wear the red beret.

887
00:46:41,400 --> 00:46:41,760
Speaker 3: Wow.

888
00:46:41,960 --> 00:46:44,239
Speaker 2: Now what blew me away out of that statement was

889
00:46:44,920 --> 00:46:51,120
Speaker 2: I'd never heard the term life ambition. That sounded hot.

890
00:46:51,719 --> 00:46:53,360
Speaker 2: I was too young to use the word sexy, but

891
00:46:53,880 --> 00:46:57,239
Speaker 2: that sounded like captivating a life ambition. Something spoke to me,

892
00:46:57,680 --> 00:46:59,440
Speaker 2: and by the way I talk the same one. At

893
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:01,759
Speaker 2: ten years old, I wanted to be a para. I

894
00:47:01,760 --> 00:47:04,440
Speaker 2: want to be a part of the parachute regiment. So

895
00:47:04,520 --> 00:47:06,360
Speaker 2: at twelve years old, I lied about my age and

896
00:47:06,400 --> 00:47:09,960
Speaker 2: joined the Army Cadets. Should have been thirteen. I progressed

897
00:47:10,320 --> 00:47:13,239
Speaker 2: rapidly through there to a seventeen years old, being the

898
00:47:13,280 --> 00:47:15,480
Speaker 2: company sant major for the battalion, number one cadet in

899
00:47:15,480 --> 00:47:19,399
Speaker 2: the UK, attached to a lord of tenants cadets the Queen,

900
00:47:19,920 --> 00:47:23,960
Speaker 2: like number one marksmen in the county, blah blah blah,

901
00:47:24,000 --> 00:47:26,719
Speaker 2: seven national awards. I was a soldier. It was absolutely

902
00:47:26,719 --> 00:47:30,640
Speaker 2: crystal clear. My destiny was going to be Parachute Regiment

903
00:47:30,640 --> 00:47:33,200
Speaker 2: and then Essays Special Forces. That was all I cared about.

904
00:47:33,440 --> 00:47:35,480
Speaker 2: I got home from school, I didn't do homework. I

905
00:47:35,520 --> 00:47:37,080
Speaker 2: put a rucksack on my back full of bricks and

906
00:47:37,080 --> 00:47:39,600
Speaker 2: I went running. I saw fitness being one of the

907
00:47:39,600 --> 00:47:44,080
Speaker 2: big problems. Life had other areas. My father was an entrepreneur,

908
00:47:44,120 --> 00:47:46,040
Speaker 2: He owned his own job, kind of owned business. My

909
00:47:46,080 --> 00:47:48,400
Speaker 2: mom was always entrepreneurial. I always wanted to be a

910
00:47:48,440 --> 00:47:53,480
Speaker 2: businessman as well, but soldiering took over. I became the

911
00:47:53,520 --> 00:47:55,600
Speaker 2: youngest instructor in the history of the British Army Cadet

912
00:47:55,600 --> 00:47:59,520
Speaker 2: Force at fourteen. All that stuff. Seventeen years old, I

913
00:47:59,560 --> 00:48:02,560
Speaker 2: applied join the Army. They offer me any job in

914
00:48:02,560 --> 00:48:04,160
Speaker 2: the Army I want. I passed the exam. I said,

915
00:48:04,160 --> 00:48:05,759
Speaker 2: I want to be a parrot. They're like, nah, get

916
00:48:05,760 --> 00:48:07,719
Speaker 2: a trade. It's better for you the business side of

917
00:48:07,760 --> 00:48:10,640
Speaker 2: me kicked in, says okay, I went parrot engineer. I

918
00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:15,319
Speaker 2: thought it's highest paid job. So two days before I'm

919
00:48:15,360 --> 00:48:18,120
Speaker 2: due to go in the army, I'm out on with

920
00:48:18,200 --> 00:48:21,040
Speaker 2: the lads. My last night in SIV Street, I was

921
00:48:21,040 --> 00:48:24,000
Speaker 2: also a parrotechnics expert. I took a homemade little pyrotechnic

922
00:48:24,040 --> 00:48:25,920
Speaker 2: device to lead off in a parking lot at midnight,

923
00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:27,720
Speaker 2: just to see myself off, go bye with the lads.

924
00:48:28,920 --> 00:48:31,680
Speaker 2: Combustion fusee reacts with the oxygen, burst into flames. That

925
00:48:31,760 --> 00:48:35,680
Speaker 2: kind of thing I'm wearing, ironically, a bomber jacket. The

926
00:48:35,719 --> 00:48:39,400
Speaker 2: fuse goes off in my pocket in the bar eleven

927
00:48:39,440 --> 00:48:43,160
Speaker 2: o'clock at night. Smoke's pouring out of my jacket. Next minute, boom,

928
00:48:43,239 --> 00:48:45,600
Speaker 2: this thing goes off, sets fire, and my jacket blows

929
00:48:45,600 --> 00:48:47,560
Speaker 2: two glasses off the bar, flash burned down my face.

930
00:48:48,120 --> 00:48:50,239
Speaker 2: Bounce has thrown me out. Call the cops, Call the

931
00:48:50,239 --> 00:48:53,400
Speaker 2: bomb squad. Anyway, let's just say my military career didn't

932
00:48:53,400 --> 00:48:57,680
Speaker 2: get off to a any kind of start. Told me

933
00:48:57,719 --> 00:48:59,920
Speaker 2: to keep my nose clean for twelve months and reapply.

934
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:03,200
Speaker 2: By that time, I wanted to be a businessman. I

935
00:49:03,200 --> 00:49:05,879
Speaker 2: started my first business at seventeen, became an entrepreneur, never

936
00:49:05,920 --> 00:49:12,439
Speaker 2: looked back. Wow. Yeah, because here's what I will say.

937
00:49:13,080 --> 00:49:16,240
Speaker 2: Great one thing that that track gave me at twelve

938
00:49:16,320 --> 00:49:19,640
Speaker 2: years old to seventeen, what did it teach me? Discipline,

939
00:49:20,080 --> 00:49:22,120
Speaker 2: how to get up in the morning, how to value

940
00:49:22,120 --> 00:49:25,160
Speaker 2: health and fitness, how to be self motivated, all of

941
00:49:25,200 --> 00:49:28,000
Speaker 2: the qualities that were lining up to become an entrepreneur

942
00:49:28,080 --> 00:49:30,320
Speaker 2: for life, as well as how to teach, which is

943
00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:32,719
Speaker 2: kind of what I'm doing now. So yeah, I see

944
00:49:32,719 --> 00:49:34,920
Speaker 2: it as a divine intervention from the universe there to

945
00:49:34,920 --> 00:49:37,280
Speaker 2: stop me running off killing people for being a political

946
00:49:37,320 --> 00:49:38,879
Speaker 2: porn on a chess game I don't want to play,

947
00:49:39,280 --> 00:49:41,239
Speaker 2: to actually trying to add value and serve the world

948
00:49:41,320 --> 00:49:43,879
Speaker 2: with insights from the path that I've bought.

949
00:49:45,080 --> 00:49:47,319
Speaker 1: All Right, my last question is really I love that

950
00:49:47,880 --> 00:49:50,440
Speaker 1: there's so much stuff. We could do a three hour podcast.

951
00:49:50,480 --> 00:49:52,839
Speaker 1: Obviously we can't, but we're going to get you back

952
00:49:52,840 --> 00:49:55,399
Speaker 1: because I have a name in spoken. I don't want

953
00:49:55,400 --> 00:49:57,080
Speaker 1: to I don't even want to say the things I

954
00:49:57,120 --> 00:49:59,000
Speaker 1: haven't spoken about because I don't want to bring them

955
00:49:59,040 --> 00:50:02,240
Speaker 1: up yet. But maybe an other time. But let's finish

956
00:50:02,320 --> 00:50:04,680
Speaker 1: with you talking to us for a minute or three

957
00:50:04,760 --> 00:50:09,839
Speaker 1: about happiness. I don't care where you go with this,

958
00:50:09,920 --> 00:50:13,080
Speaker 1: but I'm just interested in your take on it. Obviously

959
00:50:13,120 --> 00:50:16,360
Speaker 1: everybody nobody wants to be less happy. Nobody wants to

960
00:50:16,440 --> 00:50:20,680
Speaker 1: be sad, miserable, depressed, or anxious. It's pretty much the

961
00:50:20,800 --> 00:50:24,320
Speaker 1: universal goal, or one of them. Talk to us about

962
00:50:24,360 --> 00:50:26,520
Speaker 1: that human condition, if you would.

963
00:50:27,480 --> 00:50:30,360
Speaker 2: Happy to I just got back from three days with

964
00:50:30,520 --> 00:50:33,959
Speaker 2: Dr Jo Despenser and Barcelona, and he actually shared something

965
00:50:33,960 --> 00:50:36,680
Speaker 2: from stage when he was being interviewed. That's the same question.

966
00:50:37,000 --> 00:50:39,600
Speaker 2: So he says, what's the secret to being happy? And

967
00:50:39,640 --> 00:50:41,760
Speaker 2: he looked in the interviewer's eyes and he said, stop

968
00:50:41,760 --> 00:50:44,960
Speaker 2: being unhappy. Now that sounds a little simplistic, but I

969
00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:46,920
Speaker 2: have a slightly different take on that I've been teaching

970
00:50:46,960 --> 00:50:49,120
Speaker 2: for a long time, and that is, if you really

971
00:50:49,120 --> 00:50:52,239
Speaker 2: want to be happy, you've got to understand what happiness is.

972
00:50:52,320 --> 00:50:56,240
Speaker 2: Happiness is a short term emotion, and as human beings

973
00:50:56,440 --> 00:50:59,439
Speaker 2: were designed to feel a range of emotions. I don't

974
00:50:59,440 --> 00:51:02,319
Speaker 2: want to be happy at my mother's funeral, right, but

975
00:51:02,440 --> 00:51:06,440
Speaker 2: I was complete. There's no unfinished conversation. She was out

976
00:51:06,480 --> 00:51:08,200
Speaker 2: of pain. It was like there was a there was

977
00:51:08,200 --> 00:51:12,879
Speaker 2: a different sense. There wasn't unhappy, yes, but it wasn't

978
00:51:12,920 --> 00:51:16,800
Speaker 2: like you know, tragic, wasn't like victimhood. So there's a

979
00:51:16,800 --> 00:51:20,920
Speaker 2: difference between understanding happiness. As I said, unfulfillment or joy.

980
00:51:21,200 --> 00:51:24,239
Speaker 2: Joy is a different state. But if you want to

981
00:51:24,440 --> 00:51:28,720
Speaker 2: understand happiness, then understand what it is what causes happiness.

982
00:51:28,719 --> 00:51:32,960
Speaker 2: It's pretty damn simple. Happiness is a byproduct or a

983
00:51:33,040 --> 00:51:39,880
Speaker 2: consequence of thinking happy thoughts. Case closed. Anger is a

984
00:51:39,880 --> 00:51:44,399
Speaker 2: byproduct or consequence of thinking angry thoughts. Case closed. Every

985
00:51:44,440 --> 00:51:49,480
Speaker 2: thought produces a chemical neuropeptide hormone that impacts the biochemistry

986
00:51:49,480 --> 00:51:51,360
Speaker 2: and the bloodstream that then is felt as what we

987
00:51:51,440 --> 00:51:55,480
Speaker 2: call an emotion. But the starting point, the trigger point,

988
00:51:55,600 --> 00:51:59,680
Speaker 2: is the thought. So, okay, if you don't want to

989
00:51:59,680 --> 00:52:02,480
Speaker 2: be you know, miserable, you want to be unhappy, Stop

990
00:52:02,640 --> 00:52:05,480
Speaker 2: thinking miserable thoughts. You want to be depressed, Stop think

991
00:52:05,480 --> 00:52:07,320
Speaker 2: depressing thought sounds too simple. You want to be happy,

992
00:52:07,360 --> 00:52:12,480
Speaker 2: Start thinking happier thoughts. Now that's the surface answer. How

993
00:52:12,480 --> 00:52:15,279
Speaker 2: do you make it real? You start understanding what your

994
00:52:15,440 --> 00:52:18,319
Speaker 2: rules for happiness are. And now we get into some

995
00:52:18,360 --> 00:52:21,720
Speaker 2: meat and potatoes, because so many people are walking around

996
00:52:22,200 --> 00:52:24,920
Speaker 2: with rules around what has to happen in order to

997
00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:27,480
Speaker 2: make them happy that they can't control. And that is

998
00:52:27,480 --> 00:52:31,239
Speaker 2: almost like a combination to an uncrackable safe. If everybody

999
00:52:31,360 --> 00:52:33,920
Speaker 2: likes me, if the weather's breaking great, if my boss

1000
00:52:33,920 --> 00:52:36,960
Speaker 2: doesn't do this, if this, this, this, this, and this happened,

1001
00:52:36,960 --> 00:52:38,920
Speaker 2: and the moon's in frecking Pluto and mercury is not

1002
00:52:38,960 --> 00:52:42,560
Speaker 2: in retrograde, then I'll be happy, right, and you walking

1003
00:52:42,560 --> 00:52:47,560
Speaker 2: around miserable wondering why life sucks. No. Right, I'll give

1004
00:52:47,600 --> 00:52:51,239
Speaker 2: you an analogy for health because something you'd relate to now.

1005
00:52:51,480 --> 00:52:53,000
Speaker 2: I used to want to hold chain of health clubs.

1006
00:52:53,000 --> 00:52:55,640
Speaker 2: You've owned health clubs, et cetera. Right, So what are

1007
00:52:55,680 --> 00:52:58,799
Speaker 2: people's rules for health? Somebody can have a rule that

1008
00:52:58,800 --> 00:53:01,680
Speaker 2: says in order to feel healthy and they value health.

1009
00:53:02,000 --> 00:53:03,640
Speaker 2: I'm not saying you don't value happiness. I'm am saying

1010
00:53:03,680 --> 00:53:05,800
Speaker 2: you don't value health. Health is one of your top values.

1011
00:53:05,840 --> 00:53:08,040
Speaker 2: So you want to be healthy, But your rules for

1012
00:53:08,120 --> 00:53:11,160
Speaker 2: health say that in order for me to give myself

1013
00:53:11,280 --> 00:53:16,480
Speaker 2: permission to feel healthy, notice the subconscious language frame, then

1014
00:53:16,560 --> 00:53:19,040
Speaker 2: I have to have ten percent or less body fat.

1015
00:53:19,080 --> 00:53:21,080
Speaker 2: I have to eat organic food, I have to train

1016
00:53:21,120 --> 00:53:23,920
Speaker 2: four times a week. So what does that mean the

1017
00:53:23,960 --> 00:53:26,279
Speaker 2: gym closes for a refit or a bank holiday, you

1018
00:53:26,280 --> 00:53:29,160
Speaker 2: can only train three times and now you don't feel healthy. Bullshit,

1019
00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:32,040
Speaker 2: You just set yourself up to fail. You have somebody

1020
00:53:32,080 --> 00:53:36,280
Speaker 2: else who values health, But their rules are I feel

1021
00:53:36,280 --> 00:53:38,000
Speaker 2: healthy when I get out of bed in the morning,

1022
00:53:38,040 --> 00:53:40,560
Speaker 2: put two feet on the ground, stretch, drink a glass

1023
00:53:40,560 --> 00:53:44,120
Speaker 2: of filded water, and smile and be grateful. Now is

1024
00:53:44,160 --> 00:53:47,080
Speaker 2: it all of that inside their control? A bank holiday

1025
00:53:47,080 --> 00:53:51,000
Speaker 2: ain't going to change that, right? A measurement on a

1026
00:53:51,040 --> 00:53:54,520
Speaker 2: fat caliber caliber ain't going to change that. So what

1027
00:53:54,560 --> 00:53:57,360
Speaker 2: are your rules for health determine how you feel healthy?

1028
00:53:57,920 --> 00:53:58,240
Speaker 1: Yes?

1029
00:53:58,560 --> 00:54:02,239
Speaker 2: What your rules for happiness determine how you feel happiness?

1030
00:54:02,440 --> 00:54:04,279
Speaker 2: I feel happy because I get to be alive at

1031
00:54:04,280 --> 00:54:06,840
Speaker 2: a time in human history my ancestors have dreamed about.

1032
00:54:07,760 --> 00:54:09,640
Speaker 2: If you can't think of twenty things to be grateful

1033
00:54:09,680 --> 00:54:11,640
Speaker 2: for right now, you ain't looking hard enough.

1034
00:54:12,320 --> 00:54:12,680
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1035
00:54:13,080 --> 00:54:14,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, two games in life you want to play or

1036
00:54:14,880 --> 00:54:18,239
Speaker 2: finish with us. If I said to your audience, Craig,

1037
00:54:18,920 --> 00:54:21,840
Speaker 2: I've got a check for one hundred thousand dollars, and

1038
00:54:21,920 --> 00:54:23,719
Speaker 2: I will give that to anyone who can make a

1039
00:54:23,719 --> 00:54:27,600
Speaker 2: list of ten things that suck about their life. I've

1040
00:54:27,600 --> 00:54:31,160
Speaker 2: got a lot of people winning that game. But if

1041
00:54:31,200 --> 00:54:34,160
Speaker 2: I say change your rules, I've got one hundred thousand dollars.

1042
00:54:34,560 --> 00:54:36,799
Speaker 2: And in order for you to get that check, you've

1043
00:54:36,800 --> 00:54:38,920
Speaker 2: got to write a list of ten things you are

1044
00:54:38,960 --> 00:54:42,080
Speaker 2: sincerely or can be grateful for in your life. I've

1045
00:54:42,080 --> 00:54:44,160
Speaker 2: got news for you. Everybody's going to win that game. Why,

1046
00:54:44,200 --> 00:54:45,479
Speaker 2: because they're going to look hard enough.

1047
00:54:46,080 --> 00:54:47,560
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, right.

1048
00:54:47,920 --> 00:54:50,200
Speaker 2: The question isn't can I be happy? I'm not happy?

1049
00:54:50,239 --> 00:54:51,640
Speaker 2: Do you want to be happy? The question is what

1050
00:54:51,719 --> 00:54:52,680
Speaker 2: game do you want to play?

1051
00:54:53,560 --> 00:54:53,920
Speaker 3: Yes?

1052
00:54:54,200 --> 00:54:57,760
Speaker 2: Because what's wrong is always available. Unhappiness is always available.

1053
00:54:57,800 --> 00:55:00,839
Speaker 2: Turn on the news. We'll give you all the reasons. Right,

1054
00:55:00,960 --> 00:55:03,040
Speaker 2: It's all the same news, just keeps happening to different people.

1055
00:55:03,040 --> 00:55:05,520
Speaker 2: Have they figured that out yet? Turn off the damn

1056
00:55:05,560 --> 00:55:07,839
Speaker 2: news and start starring in your own movie rather than

1057
00:55:07,880 --> 00:55:10,279
Speaker 2: being recruited as an unpaid film exture in some big

1058
00:55:10,280 --> 00:55:13,360
Speaker 2: budget disaster bullshit. That's making you feel unhappy. You start

1059
00:55:13,400 --> 00:55:15,240
Speaker 2: with that, and it's going to get easier.

1060
00:55:17,239 --> 00:55:19,839
Speaker 1: Mate, you killed that. I had to say that, I

1061
00:55:19,880 --> 00:55:22,319
Speaker 1: had to critique you, but fuck you killed that. I

1062
00:55:22,400 --> 00:55:26,040
Speaker 1: loved that. That is so good, so true, so inspiring,

1063
00:55:26,840 --> 00:55:31,120
Speaker 1: so understandable. How do people connect with you, find you,

1064
00:55:31,160 --> 00:55:35,200
Speaker 1: follow you, and get a little bit of Paya Sage

1065
00:55:35,200 --> 00:55:35,960
Speaker 1: in their life?

1066
00:55:36,640 --> 00:55:39,440
Speaker 2: Sure, Instagram is always a good way. I put a

1067
00:55:39,440 --> 00:55:41,040
Speaker 2: lot of stuff out there to try to help people,

1068
00:55:41,719 --> 00:55:46,280
Speaker 2: the real peters Age. You'll see me on there obviously,

1069
00:55:46,320 --> 00:55:49,439
Speaker 2: my website Petersage dot Com, a YouTube channel. I'm putting

1070
00:55:49,480 --> 00:55:50,920
Speaker 2: a lot of stuff out of So I'm on social

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00:55:51,160 --> 00:55:52,759
Speaker 2: come and follow me. I'm spending a lot of my

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Speaker 2: time right now helping coaches, trainers, healers and therapists get

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Speaker 2: more financially profitable because it's such a shame my background's business.

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Speaker 2: I've made tens of millions of dollars, lost millions of dollars.

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Speaker 2: I know the game in businesses, it's all I am.

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Speaker 2: But when you see coaches, trained therapists that have the

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Speaker 2: skill set to want to serve and heal or contribute,

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Speaker 2: but they haven't got a clue how to turn that

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Speaker 2: into a six figure lifestyle, it saddens my heart. So

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00:56:19,480 --> 00:56:21,000
Speaker 2: let me fix the business side for you so you

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00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:22,839
Speaker 2: can go out and help humanity. That's where I'm at

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Speaker 2: right now. So if that resonates, come follow my work.

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Speaker 1: Awesome, mate, We'll say goodbye off here in a moment,

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Speaker 1: but officially for the moment. Thanks for being on the

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Speaker 1: You project. I really appreciate your time.

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Speaker 2: Craig, a real pleasure. What you're doing is amazing work

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Speaker 2: in the world. My friend. I'm so glad you picked

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00:56:39,480 --> 00:56:42,239
Speaker 2: that book back up all those years ago and just

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Speaker 2: ignited that spark as to who you really are. You're

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Speaker 2: a gift to the WORLDFARE appreciate you.