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Speaker 1: Apoday Production.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to the Sheep Risers podcast. I'm Ashy and I'm Tiana.

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Speaker 3: This podcast is about female empowerment and encouraging you to

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Speaker 3: be your biggest, boldest, and most authentic version of yourself.

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Speaker 2: We help you shed the shame, grow to a new level.

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Speaker 2: We're gonna laugh, cry, and talk about the topics everyone

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Speaker 2: else is too afraid to talk about.

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Speaker 4: Get ready for your next level of self.

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Speaker 2: Hello everybody, Welcome back to a Wednesday episode, but cool

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Speaker 2: episode for you today. It's all about getting attention, no,

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Speaker 2: just taking up space and not feeling shame around, enjoying attention,

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Speaker 2: being big and bold, and showing who you truly are.

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Speaker 2: So we give you five ways that you can do

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Speaker 2: this and feel really confident about it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we want to help you build a relationship with

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Speaker 3: being seen and liking attention in a healthy way. So

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Speaker 3: you don't feel weird or feel arrogant about being a

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Speaker 3: confident version of yourself because there's a lot of negativity

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Speaker 3: around that around or I don't want to become confident

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Speaker 3: because what if it makes me look arrogant? But it's

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Speaker 3: about that, So we want to help you reframe and

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Speaker 3: retrain yourself to see it in a different light.

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Speaker 4: So let's get started.

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Speaker 2: Let's get into it. So the first one is just

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Speaker 2: to be around the right people.

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Speaker 4: Very important.

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Speaker 1: It is the most important.

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Speaker 2: If you have to dim your light to be around

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Speaker 2: certain people, they are not your people. I always say,

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Speaker 2: like the best of friends, of the people you feel

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Speaker 2: most confident with, you'll be like your childlike self. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: you're in a child will come out and he or

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Speaker 2: she will be so playful and so free to just

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Speaker 2: be silly and say whatever. And if you say the

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Speaker 2: wrong thing or you say something like oh fucking mean

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Speaker 2: to say that, it's like cool, yeah.

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Speaker 1: Or good, there's no judgment.

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Speaker 4: That's fine.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, So just really be mindful of who you're being

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Speaker 2: around and how you feel when you do speak and

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Speaker 2: act and be a certain way. Is it coming from

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Speaker 2: a really authentic place or do you feel like you

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Speaker 2: have to put a lid on who you are because

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Speaker 2: it doesn't feel good to do that.

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Speaker 4: That's a big one.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Yeah, pay attention to how people make you feel.

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Speaker 3: If you can just sit with yourself whilst you're around

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Speaker 3: other people and just do a little check in with yourself,

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Speaker 3: like do I feel like I need to be small?

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Speaker 3: Do I have to pretend to be somebody that I'm not.

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Speaker 3: Am I putting on a mask right now? Or am

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Speaker 3: I trying to impress this person? I'm actually not even

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Speaker 3: being myself. Like, those little questions will help you understand

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Speaker 3: who the people are around you and how you behave them,

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Speaker 3: because that's going to tell you whether you feel safe

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Speaker 3: with them, whether I feel comfortable, whether you feel like

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Speaker 3: you can fully let loose and open up and be

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Speaker 3: your true, authentic self, or if you're trying to wear

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Speaker 3: some kind of mask.

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Speaker 2: And I honestly think the right people you are enough

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Speaker 2: to ask those questions. If I'm sitting there asking those questions,

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Speaker 2: I'm already not being myself.

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Speaker 4: If something's off. That's a really good point.

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Speaker 1: Actually, if I'm just with.

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Speaker 2: The people who I can just be myself with, I

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Speaker 2: know that my people because they just love and accept

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Speaker 2: me for exactly who.

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Speaker 3: I am, that's a really good point actually. But if

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Speaker 3: you are asking these questions, it'll be helpful for the

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Speaker 3: people you don't absolutely comfortable around. Yeah, I can understand

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Speaker 3: why you're behaving.

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Speaker 2: Like that, So I think that's yeah, definitely context, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: for sure.

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Speaker 3: So the next one is just being confident enough to

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Speaker 3: back what it is that you're standing for beautiful. So

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Speaker 3: no matter what it is, whether it's your opinion, whether

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Speaker 3: it's your perspective, whether it's the way that you see

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Speaker 3: the world, just be willing to own it. You've got

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Speaker 3: to be willing to back yourself, Like, no one can

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Speaker 3: be confident or wear confidence around the things that you're

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Speaker 3: talking about, Like no one can stand up for those things.

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Speaker 3: So if you do it with confidence and somebody still

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Speaker 3: pushes back, that's totally fine. People are allowed to have

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Speaker 3: their opinion. So you have to be willing to stand

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Speaker 3: on your own and be okay being quote unquote like

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Speaker 3: a black sheep having a different voice, having a different opinion.

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Speaker 4: And yes, there are going.

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Speaker 3: To be people who push back, and that may feel

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Speaker 3: scary at times, and it may feel challenging to do

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Speaker 3: that at first, but when you start to implement that

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Speaker 3: and you get a little bit more comfortable using your

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Speaker 3: voice and realizing that you have one, that you can

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Speaker 3: have opinions. You're allowed to speak up, you're allowed to

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Speaker 3: push back, you're allowed to have conflicting beliefs or opinions

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Speaker 3: with other people. And just know that yes, again, like

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Speaker 3: what I said, they will come with people disagreeing with you.

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Speaker 3: It's going to be come with people having different opinion

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Speaker 3: or wanting to go against what it is you're saying.

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Speaker 3: But that's not your responsibility. No, your responsibility is to

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Speaker 3: completely own who you are as a person. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 3: your responsibility to own that every part of who you are.

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Speaker 3: And so if you can just honor yourself in that way,

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Speaker 3: you'll find it's a lot more easier to take up

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Speaker 3: space because you're not trying to pretend to be someone

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Speaker 3: that you're not. You know, it's a lot harder to

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Speaker 3: try to people please, and it's a lot harder to

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Speaker 3: try to wear a mask and pretend to be someone

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Speaker 3: that you're not because you can only keep up a

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Speaker 3: facade for so long. So true, and when you don't

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Speaker 3: have the same amount of energy, you're.

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Speaker 4: Not going to be able to do that as well.

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Speaker 4: Can be tired, you're gonna be exhausted.

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Speaker 3: What about when you don't get enough sleep, You're not

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Speaker 3: going to uphold that facade for as long.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you know.

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Speaker 3: So it's so much easier on you and your energy

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Speaker 3: levels if you can just be all of who you are,

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Speaker 3: Because when you do that, what are you doing like

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Speaker 3: you're teaching yourself how to take up space. You're teaching

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Speaker 3: yourself that it's safe to take up space and that

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Speaker 3: you are allowed to have an opinion.

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Speaker 4: And I can only say this from experience.

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Speaker 3: Like I used to be so terrified to take up

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Speaker 3: space because I didn't think I was worthy of doing.

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Speaker 4: So, you know. And then I was like, why am

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Speaker 4: I so scared of this? Why am I so scared

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Speaker 4: of being seen?

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Speaker 3: And only when I started to interject and insert my

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Speaker 3: opinions on my thoughts into conversations with friends.

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Speaker 4: I was like, Oh, it's actually not as scary as

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Speaker 4: I think.

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Speaker 1: It's valued.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's valued, and people actually want to hear my opinions.

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Speaker 1: Goosha.

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Speaker 4: So that was really powerful for me.

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Speaker 2: I used to struggle when people pushed back and suppose

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Speaker 2: this moments where I might still but it's actually okay

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Speaker 2: for people to push back, Yes, you've got your opinion.

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Speaker 2: I feel like COVID was a really interesting time for

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Speaker 2: opposing opinions.

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Speaker 4: We've had a good conversation about this morning, actually, Yeah.

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Speaker 2: And it's like all people were vaccinations and they weren't

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Speaker 2: for it. And I heard about so many friendships ending

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Speaker 2: and relationships ending because of the conflict with it. Whereas

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Speaker 2: I had friends that were choosing to vaccinate and I

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Speaker 2: had friends who were choosing not to vaccinate, but there

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Speaker 2: was never any conflict around.

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Speaker 1: It's like, you're doing what feels good for you. Good

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Speaker 1: on you. Who am I to tell you what to

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Speaker 1: do with your body? And vice versa.

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Speaker 2: It's okay for people to push back and get more

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Speaker 2: comfortable with that was I think. I used to just

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Speaker 2: what everyone else would say, yes, because I wanted to

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Speaker 2: fit in. And if they think them on their team

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Speaker 2: and I agree with them, we're the same person. We're like,

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Speaker 2: you know, think the same way. They'll love and accept

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Speaker 2: me more and want me around more. Which is if

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Speaker 2: I push back and have an opinion, they're going to leave.

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Speaker 2: That's coming from my own wounds. So just yeah, checking

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Speaker 2: where that's coming from. But confidence is so important.

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Speaker 3: And it makes sense why we do that, why we

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Speaker 3: people please and why we want to keep the peace

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Speaker 3: is because anybody who does for argument's sake, like push back,

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Speaker 3: they get labeled arrogance or they get labeled opinionated or

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Speaker 3: how rude, like yeah, simply having a different opinion. But

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Speaker 3: I think that's why The way that you approach it

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Speaker 3: is really important because if you can insert your opinions

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Speaker 3: and your perspectives without being rude about it or without

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Speaker 3: going into that confrontation energy, you're going to be able

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Speaker 3: to hold just like a normal conversation.

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Speaker 4: And go, this is what I believe, Like I'm not

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Speaker 4: here to start a fight with you.

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Speaker 3: But I'm just sharing my opinion and contributing to this conversation.

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Speaker 3: The way that you do it, I think is very important.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and getting curious, like, oh my gosh, I'm so

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Speaker 2: curious to hear more of that because I've always believed

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Speaker 2: X Y Z. Yes, I loved hear more review and

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Speaker 2: then they feel heard and you're interested in their opinion.

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Speaker 3: Yes, like you're not just trying to stuff your opinion

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Speaker 3: or like your perspective. You're curious about what their side

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Speaker 3: is and you want to understood them too.

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Speaker 2: I love that, Like, Wow, I haven't heard it like

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Speaker 2: that before, because most of the time it is I'm like, whoa,

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Speaker 2: I haven't heard that perspective.

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Speaker 1: That's cool.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm curious also like where did get the information from?

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Speaker 2: Or like where did you hear that? Or you know,

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Speaker 2: just get curious more. Yeah, Yeah, for sure. A game

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Speaker 2: changer for us has been admitting that we love attention.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, such a game change. I definitely grew

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Speaker 2: up with people saying I was an attention seeker, but

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Speaker 2: it's said in a negative way. Such an attention seeker,

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Speaker 2: like she just wants all the attention.

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Speaker 1: And yeah I do.

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Speaker 2: In dance class, if I was not the point of

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Speaker 2: that triangle at the front, I didn't like it. I

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Speaker 2: wanted to be the best dancer and I've got a

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Speaker 2: competitive nature like I do. I love being on stage.

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Speaker 2: I love performing. I love making impact. I love knowing

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Speaker 2: that they're making a different someone's life. When someone says

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Speaker 2: you've changed my life, I'm like, wow, that's cool, you know.

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Speaker 2: And even day to day, my part it from Steve

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Speaker 2: and always like I love attention. When he says, fuck

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Speaker 2: you look good, I'm like, more, tell me what else

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Speaker 2: you like. It's not bad to like attention. You think

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Speaker 2: about your partner, or your friends, or your kids or

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Speaker 2: someone that you love and they give you attention and

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Speaker 2: make you feel special. You're lying to me if you

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Speaker 2: tell me you don't like that.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you like that.

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Speaker 3: And we've been super intentional around this because the more

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Speaker 3: that you do things like shadow work, the more that

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Speaker 3: you realize that we will suppress certain parts of ourselves.

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Speaker 3: And for both of us, over the years, we've had

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Speaker 3: this attention seeker, you know, shadow or archetype and part

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Speaker 3: of ourselves that we have rejected in the years. So

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Speaker 3: now in our dynamic, it's so free to just be

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Speaker 3: who we are. They were like, well, we don't see

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Speaker 3: it in a negative light. It's not a negative thing.

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Speaker 3: We see it with neutral eyes. Yes, And we can

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Speaker 3: bring up part of us forward without any judgment, which

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Speaker 3: has totally released any shame that we may have held

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Speaker 3: around actually liking attention. Sit here and tell me that

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Speaker 3: you don't know like everyone does to some degree. And

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Speaker 3: whether you are getting it consciously or you're getting it unconsciously,

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Speaker 3: you're still getting it for sure. And at least way

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Speaker 3: us doing this has been about bringing this part of

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Speaker 3: us forward in a really productive and constructive way, so

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Speaker 3: that we're doing it in a way that we're in

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Speaker 3: control of and it's going out in unconscious ways where

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Speaker 3: we're got to be careful with what I say here.

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Speaker 3: But like posting naked photos on social media, you know, needing.

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Speaker 4: To get it from or men. You know things like that.

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Speaker 4: You know in ways that.

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Speaker 3: Strangers on the internet and in ways that I wouldn't

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Speaker 3: be proud of getting it.

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Speaker 4: We nip that in the bud.

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Speaker 2: We do. I think for the most part, with us

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Speaker 2: enjoying attention to a lot of the time, there's good

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Speaker 2: intentions behind it too. Like I love the attention that

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Speaker 2: I get when I make impact. Like I said before Eve,

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Speaker 2: when I posted my dance video, I loved the attention

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Speaker 2: of people saying, oh my gosh, I want to do this,

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Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, even inspired media book of dance.

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Speaker 4: Class I'm powering.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. I want my relationship to have that spark.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. I want my husband to look at

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Speaker 1: me like that.

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Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. I want to work hard on my

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Speaker 2: body and feel confident like you do. Like, thank you

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Speaker 2: for posting this. That's good attention, had a positive impact.

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Speaker 2: It's a good attentive impact.

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Speaker 4: Positive impact.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, whereas I'm trying to think of a negative way

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Speaker 2: I've got attention before. I'm sure there'll be plenty, but

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Speaker 2: I do it in a productive way and a lot

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Speaker 2: of time there's really good intentions behind what I'm getting

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Speaker 2: attention for. Yeah, it's like one of the human needs significance.

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Speaker 1: I used to really resist that that was.

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Speaker 2: A human need of mine, and I used to push

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Speaker 2: back on Steve when you used to say that I

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Speaker 2: valued significance. I was like, no, I don't. I value loving,

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Speaker 2: connection and contribution. And I'm like, actually, I love it all.

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Speaker 2: And he's like, so you're telling me when you walk

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Speaker 2: down that aisle where three thousand women are chanting ashy

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Speaker 2: ashy ashy and the whole room has revolved around you,

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Speaker 2: you don't think that's significant.

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Speaker 1: You don't think you're enjoying the significance of everyone screaming

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Speaker 1: your name. I was like, yep, I love it. I

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Speaker 1: was like, wow, it's like it's not.

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Speaker 2: A negative thing. Though I always thought it was like

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Speaker 2: attention seeking, ego driven. Yes, I thought it was in

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Speaker 2: a cocky, arrogant way, and I wanted to be humble

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Speaker 2: and be the good girl and be the nice girl.

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Speaker 1: And then he pointed out like that.

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Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, I love it, And now it's like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I get to love that and enjoy that and also

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Speaker 2: make beautiful act on women's lives.

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Speaker 4: How cool.

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Speaker 3: I know, it's so beautiful being on social media or

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Speaker 3: just in general having a business or online periness or

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Speaker 3: whatever you're getting attention. Everyone online is fighting for attention.

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Speaker 3: I want to fight for attention so that you buy

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Speaker 3: my product. I want to fight for attention so that

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Speaker 3: you listen to my education.

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Speaker 4: Do you know what I mean? Like everything that your.

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Speaker 2: Attention so I can get a date from you, that's right,

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Speaker 2: dates from men or messages from men.

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Speaker 4: Exactly.

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Speaker 3: Everyone is doing it in some way, shape or form.

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Speaker 3: But the more that you resist it, the more that

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Speaker 3: it will come out in unhealthy ways. And trust me,

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Speaker 3: I'm going to like the way that it comes out.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: So it's a really powerful thing to be okay, to

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Speaker 3: just admit it. And you know, any conversation we've had

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Speaker 3: with other girlfriends around this where we have brought in

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Speaker 3: Stephanie and Tatiana, which is like another aspect of this

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Speaker 3: is owning exactly how we feel, they've been like, oh

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Speaker 3: my god, I feel so free.

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Speaker 4: Why have I not done this? My Yeah? What do

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Speaker 4: you mean? Oh my god, I can do this? You can?

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Speaker 3: You know. It just removes the shame. And I think

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Speaker 3: that's something we all could use a lot more of.

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Speaker 3: And I know, speaking as somebody who has held so

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Speaker 3: much shame in the past. The moment you let that go,

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Speaker 3: it's like that invisible box that you're sitting in. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: of feeling like you're in a cage, but the door

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Speaker 3: is open.

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Speaker 4: Yes you can walk out. Yeah, you can walk out

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Speaker 4: of that cage and own it.

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Speaker 3: And then all of the things that you think people

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Speaker 3: are going to judge you for evaporate because you stop

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Speaker 3: judging yourself for them and spreeing thing ever it is.

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Speaker 2: And we're not saying that everyone wants to be on

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Speaker 2: stage and have her own change their name, like say

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Speaker 2: for Steve for example, and my mom. They don't love

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Speaker 2: attention like I love attention, but Steve loves attention from me. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: he's like a labrador. You can it can never give

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Speaker 2: enough attention to him. It's in a different facet, it's

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Speaker 2: different facets. Yeah, And even mum, she would love more

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Speaker 2: attention from her children, loving on her, visiting her, like

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Speaker 2: calling her, chicking how she's going, you know, connecting with her.

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Speaker 2: We all love it to a certain degree. So we're

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Speaker 2: not saying you have to be like us, no, but

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Speaker 2: just stop squishing the desire to enjoy attention because it

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Speaker 2: is parts of your life where you absolutely love it.

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Speaker 1: And you can enjoy and own it.

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Speaker 3: Another powerful way that will teach you how to take

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Speaker 3: up space is connection with others. So when you are

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Speaker 3: in conversation with others, especially when it comes to really

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Speaker 3: vulnerable topics, what I find has been really helpful for

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Speaker 3: me over the years is learning how to be vulnerable

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Speaker 3: about the things that I actually feel when it comes

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Speaker 3: to that specific dynamic. Say I had insecurity come up,

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Speaker 3: or I had jealousy come up, or just something triggered

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Speaker 3: me for whatever reason and I felt scared to bring

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Speaker 3: it to that person. Learning how to bring that in

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Speaker 3: and actually take up space in the moment of being like,

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Speaker 3: I'm allowed to vent to this person. I'm allowed what

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Speaker 3: I feel is valid, it's real for me. I get

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Speaker 3: to feel this and not squashing it and dismissing your

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Speaker 3: feelings and emotions because you think that all.

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Speaker 4: I don't want to take up space.

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Speaker 3: I don't want to be a burden, you know. I

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Speaker 3: don't want to talk about myself what I want to

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Speaker 3: be selfish.

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Speaker 1: Like, I don't want to see me in a different life.

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Speaker 3: Yes, I don't want to impact the way that they

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Speaker 3: see me. So learning how to take up. Space can

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Speaker 3: feel a lot like a vulnerability hangover. Sometimes were like,

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Speaker 3: but I don't want to talk about me, I want

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Speaker 3: to talk about you. Yeah, And you might even be

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Speaker 3: the person because I was like this, the person who

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Speaker 3: would always hold space everybody else, but then didn't know

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Speaker 3: how to have the spotlight on me, you know, until

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Speaker 3: I had to practice sitting in the discomfort of somebody

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Speaker 3: actually listening to me and holding space for me and

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Speaker 3: being like, hey, it's your turn.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 3: I think as women, we can naturally be a little

362
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Speaker 3: bit more self abandoning, and so we are used to that,

363
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Speaker 3: Like how many women are moms who are self neglecting?

364
00:14:27,001 --> 00:14:29,721
Speaker 3: And you know is the person who goes last and

365
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Speaker 3: eats last and washes herself last and all of those things,

366
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Speaker 3: you know, same thing goes for conversation. So practice if

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Speaker 3: you can, and if you feel comfortable being vulnerable with

368
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Speaker 3: what's actually coming up for you, whether it's in your

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Speaker 3: relationship with your husband or your partner, or your best

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Speaker 3: friend or your.

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Speaker 4: Sibling or your sister or whoever.

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Speaker 3: Something is coming up for you, be like, hey, like

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Speaker 3: this is going on for me right now and I

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Speaker 3: could really use, you know, some space to hold it

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Speaker 3: for me.

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Speaker 1: It's beautiful. I love that.

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00:14:57,161 --> 00:14:59,721
Speaker 2: And then last one would be just to unpack where

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00:14:59,721 --> 00:15:02,121
Speaker 2: along the line someone said something to you that's impacted you.

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Speaker 2: So for me, I push it down because it's like, oh,

380
00:15:04,121 --> 00:15:07,681
Speaker 2: you're such an attention see so, oh shit, that's bad. Normally,

381
00:15:07,721 --> 00:15:09,921
Speaker 2: when we suppress something, it's because someone says something along

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00:15:09,961 --> 00:15:12,801
Speaker 2: the ways and it's been quote unquote bad and looked

383
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Speaker 2: down upon, or you've been pushed out of the tribe

384
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Speaker 2: because it's not accepted to be like that. So with

385
00:15:17,801 --> 00:15:19,681
Speaker 2: anything like that, I think it's really important to try

386
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Speaker 2: and wind it back to where you might have heard that.

387
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Speaker 1: It mightn't be your parents the same you're.

388
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Speaker 2: Too loud, like everyone's looking at us, you're embarrassing me,

389
00:15:26,241 --> 00:15:29,601
Speaker 2: like so crying so loudly, keep it down in a

390
00:15:29,681 --> 00:15:32,841
Speaker 2: room full of important people, you know, just moments like that.

391
00:15:32,881 --> 00:15:34,921
Speaker 2: There can be little micro moments with children that really

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Speaker 2: impact you growing up.

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Speaker 1: And I don't think it's parents don't realize how often

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Speaker 1: we do it.

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Speaker 2: So if you've got a story that you're too much,

396
00:15:42,081 --> 00:15:45,121
Speaker 2: you're too loud, you are an attention seeking whore, find

397
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Speaker 2: out where it's come from, and then ask yourself like

398
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Speaker 2: what I can do to unpack that story and dissolve

399
00:15:50,361 --> 00:15:52,361
Speaker 2: it away, because otherwise you let it rule your life,

400
00:15:52,441 --> 00:15:55,721
Speaker 2: then you prevent yourself from actually enjoying it. I think

401
00:15:55,761 --> 00:15:58,121
Speaker 2: that can prevent connection, it can prevent impact, It can

402
00:15:58,161 --> 00:16:01,161
Speaker 2: prevent you just living your best life. That's holding you back,

403
00:16:01,201 --> 00:16:02,961
Speaker 2: and you're hanging on to that story as truth and

404
00:16:03,001 --> 00:16:05,361
Speaker 2: it's not actually truth. In that moment, you might have

405
00:16:05,401 --> 00:16:07,441
Speaker 2: been very loud in I don't know wherever you were

406
00:16:07,481 --> 00:16:09,921
Speaker 2: with your parents, for sure. Doesn't mean you as a

407
00:16:09,921 --> 00:16:12,041
Speaker 2: person is too loud and too much.

408
00:16:12,241 --> 00:16:12,961
Speaker 1: For everyone else.

409
00:16:13,121 --> 00:16:15,801
Speaker 4: What story? What are you making it mean? What are

410
00:16:15,801 --> 00:16:17,161
Speaker 4: you making it mean? For sure?

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Speaker 1: Because it can be really really damaging.

412
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Speaker 4: Definitely can And yeah, I know we said five, but

413
00:16:21,681 --> 00:16:22,241
Speaker 4: I've got a six.

414
00:16:22,321 --> 00:16:23,361
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, go for it.

415
00:16:23,401 --> 00:16:26,361
Speaker 3: So I was just reflecting on my journey and what

416
00:16:26,401 --> 00:16:28,161
Speaker 3: I've kind of done to take up space, and I

417
00:16:28,201 --> 00:16:31,321
Speaker 3: feel things like being bold in what I'm wearing and

418
00:16:31,361 --> 00:16:33,281
Speaker 3: how I choose to express myself has been a way

419
00:16:33,321 --> 00:16:35,321
Speaker 3: that I've learned how to take up space, right Because

420
00:16:35,321 --> 00:16:37,841
Speaker 3: when I think about us all wanting to get along

421
00:16:37,961 --> 00:16:39,641
Speaker 3: and wanting to be a part of the gang and

422
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Speaker 3: the tribe, and connecting with other people.

423
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Speaker 4: It's like we all tend to follow the crowd, you know.

424
00:16:44,521 --> 00:16:46,681
Speaker 3: I mean not everybody obviously, but like in the past,

425
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Speaker 3: I've done that, and what I did was like I

426
00:16:49,401 --> 00:16:52,761
Speaker 3: would follow the way people behave or what they would do,

427
00:16:52,921 --> 00:16:54,561
Speaker 3: how they would dress or act, and then I never

428
00:16:54,601 --> 00:16:57,681
Speaker 3: really allowed myself to explore how I wanted to express myself.

429
00:16:57,881 --> 00:16:59,521
Speaker 3: I feel like I've really come into that a lot

430
00:16:59,561 --> 00:17:02,881
Speaker 3: this last like six months or a year, where I've

431
00:17:02,921 --> 00:17:05,360
Speaker 3: really allowed myself to go, Okay, well, I know this

432
00:17:05,481 --> 00:17:07,281
Speaker 3: is trending, but like, what do I want to wear?

433
00:17:07,721 --> 00:17:10,001
Speaker 4: You know, I know this is normal for what everybody

434
00:17:10,001 --> 00:17:10,640
Speaker 4: else is doing right now.

435
00:17:10,681 --> 00:17:12,321
Speaker 3: Everyone's got like the clean girl aesthetic, and I'm like,

436
00:17:12,321 --> 00:17:14,360
Speaker 3: I want to wear my hair and little clips and boats. Yeah,

437
00:17:14,441 --> 00:17:17,801
Speaker 3: they're real pretty like finding ways to express myself where

438
00:17:18,001 --> 00:17:21,240
Speaker 3: I'm pushing outside of the confines of my story of

439
00:17:21,441 --> 00:17:22,721
Speaker 3: what people will judge me for.

440
00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:24,841
Speaker 4: Yeah, and what I need to do to fit in, you.

441
00:17:24,801 --> 00:17:26,361
Speaker 3: Know, of like you know, the fear of like, oh

442
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,840
Speaker 3: but that will make me different, but it'll make me different.

443
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:29,401
Speaker 4: Be different.

444
00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:32,760
Speaker 3: Give yourself permission to be different if you don't want

445
00:17:32,801 --> 00:17:34,880
Speaker 3: to follow the trends. Don't follow the trends. If you

446
00:17:34,880 --> 00:17:37,080
Speaker 3: want to do something different and nobody else around you

447
00:17:37,201 --> 00:17:40,120
Speaker 3: is doing it, do it because that is you, in

448
00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:43,281
Speaker 3: a way, taking up space without actually having to voice anything.

449
00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:45,761
Speaker 4: It's you being bold in the choices that you make.

450
00:17:45,801 --> 00:17:47,721
Speaker 4: It's you being bold in the things that.

451
00:17:47,721 --> 00:17:49,281
Speaker 3: You wear and the way that you want to express

452
00:17:49,281 --> 00:17:52,200
Speaker 3: yourself and how you want to speak, or how you communicate,

453
00:17:52,281 --> 00:17:54,360
Speaker 3: or how you want to love boldly like all of

454
00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:58,641
Speaker 3: those things, are you choosing to take up space in

455
00:17:58,681 --> 00:18:02,401
Speaker 3: your own life and not willing to squish yourself into

456
00:18:02,441 --> 00:18:05,120
Speaker 3: this box that we keep talking about around who you

457
00:18:05,160 --> 00:18:06,961
Speaker 3: think you need to be in order to get acceptance

458
00:18:06,961 --> 00:18:09,160
Speaker 3: from others. It's so cool because taking up space is

459
00:18:09,201 --> 00:18:11,161
Speaker 3: not just about taking up space with others. It's about

460
00:18:11,201 --> 00:18:14,600
Speaker 3: taking up space within yourself, who you are as a woman.

461
00:18:15,041 --> 00:18:17,960
Speaker 3: Be louder, be bolder, allow yourself to push beyond the

462
00:18:18,001 --> 00:18:21,080
Speaker 3: confines of that limitation you have of I can't speak

463
00:18:21,160 --> 00:18:23,321
Speaker 3: up here, I can't say this, I can't wear this,

464
00:18:23,481 --> 00:18:24,801
Speaker 3: I can't do this, I can't.

465
00:18:24,561 --> 00:18:25,241
Speaker 4: Behave like that.

466
00:18:25,360 --> 00:18:27,640
Speaker 3: Push beyond the comfort zone of what that looks like,

467
00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:29,801
Speaker 3: and that's how you'll learn how to take up space.

468
00:18:29,880 --> 00:18:34,360
Speaker 4: That's really cool, Mike drop what she said so cool.

469
00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,361
Speaker 2: So we hope you can just reflect on this episode

470
00:18:36,441 --> 00:18:39,281
Speaker 2: and checking with yourself where you're holding yourself back or

471
00:18:39,321 --> 00:18:41,121
Speaker 2: you have a story that you're too much or too

472
00:18:41,160 --> 00:18:44,881
Speaker 2: loud and depriving yourself of enjoying attention and being big

473
00:18:44,921 --> 00:18:47,281
Speaker 2: and bold. If that's within you, that it's shine that

474
00:18:47,321 --> 00:18:49,361
Speaker 2: it comes through. And also the more you do that,

475
00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:50,881
Speaker 2: And that's why we want to talk about it because

476
00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:52,681
Speaker 2: we want other women. We want to have this ripple

477
00:18:52,721 --> 00:18:54,761
Speaker 2: effect of other women be like I actually like attention too.

478
00:18:55,080 --> 00:18:56,281
Speaker 2: I'm going to show up on social media.

479
00:18:56,281 --> 00:18:56,880
Speaker 1: I'm going to do this.

480
00:18:56,961 --> 00:18:59,281
Speaker 2: I'm going to speak up and share my opinion next

481
00:18:59,281 --> 00:19:01,600
Speaker 2: time instead of just sitting back thinking that no one

482
00:19:01,681 --> 00:19:03,241
Speaker 2: wants to hear it, or that I'll be pushed out

483
00:19:03,521 --> 00:19:05,401
Speaker 2: if so. And if people push you out that you're

484
00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:07,241
Speaker 2: having an opinion, they're not your people. You don't be

485
00:19:07,241 --> 00:19:08,761
Speaker 2: around those people. We're going to be around people that

486
00:19:08,801 --> 00:19:11,760
Speaker 2: will help you expand and fte more conversation and have

487
00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:15,521
Speaker 2: that not conflict, but back and forth of sharing opinions

488
00:19:15,521 --> 00:19:17,121
Speaker 2: to learn and be more open minded to what else

489
00:19:17,201 --> 00:19:17,840
Speaker 2: other people think.

490
00:19:17,961 --> 00:19:20,961
Speaker 3: Absolutely, and this is a huge conversation around just being

491
00:19:21,080 --> 00:19:23,640
Speaker 3: willing to be a bigger version of yourself. Yeah, Because

492
00:19:23,640 --> 00:19:25,801
Speaker 3: if you're willing to admit that you enjoy attention, that

493
00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:28,440
Speaker 3: you actually want more of it, will you're willing to

494
00:19:28,481 --> 00:19:31,080
Speaker 3: be seen for not the watered down version of you.

495
00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:32,840
Speaker 3: You're willing to be seen for the big version of you,

496
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:34,441
Speaker 3: for the bold version of you, for the one who

497
00:19:34,441 --> 00:19:37,201
Speaker 3: has opinions, speaks up, who wants all of those things,

498
00:19:37,201 --> 00:19:38,801
Speaker 3: who is free.

499
00:19:38,561 --> 00:19:39,721
Speaker 4: In who you actually are?

500
00:19:40,241 --> 00:19:42,440
Speaker 3: You know, so you're allowing to be like, hey, like

501
00:19:42,481 --> 00:19:44,401
Speaker 3: I want to be seen for who I truly am.

502
00:19:44,721 --> 00:19:46,481
Speaker 3: You have to be willing to be yourself first before

503
00:19:46,521 --> 00:19:49,001
Speaker 3: you'll allow that to happen. You will feel resistance when

504
00:19:49,001 --> 00:19:50,761
Speaker 3: you first do it. It's gonna feel little bit scary,

505
00:19:50,761 --> 00:19:52,481
Speaker 3: it's gonna feel unnatural, it's going to feel a little

506
00:19:52,481 --> 00:19:53,201
Speaker 3: bit ah.

507
00:19:53,281 --> 00:19:54,840
Speaker 4: But you'll also be excited by it too.

508
00:19:55,080 --> 00:19:57,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, you be like, Wow, I'm finally breaking free of

509
00:19:57,281 --> 00:19:59,241
Speaker 3: this mold that I keep trying to stuff myself into.

510
00:19:59,360 --> 00:20:02,121
Speaker 2: Yeah, and think about anyone that you're really inspired by,

511
00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:05,600
Speaker 2: whether it's a super successful business woman or a actor,

512
00:20:05,801 --> 00:20:08,801
Speaker 2: or just someone that you're in admiration of. They're taking

513
00:20:08,880 --> 00:20:11,521
Speaker 2: up space and they don't give two shits what Sally

514
00:20:11,681 --> 00:20:14,400
Speaker 2: Underscore eighty eight on Instagram thinks of them. They are

515
00:20:14,441 --> 00:20:18,240
Speaker 2: taking up space big bold then you could ever dream of.

516
00:20:18,281 --> 00:20:20,400
Speaker 2: The sky's are limits, and they're going at it hard,

517
00:20:20,721 --> 00:20:22,281
Speaker 2: and you're so inspired by them because look at the

518
00:20:22,281 --> 00:20:24,481
Speaker 2: big bold moves that they do and the life they've

519
00:20:24,481 --> 00:20:26,921
Speaker 2: created for themselves. It's from taking up space, not from

520
00:20:27,201 --> 00:20:29,200
Speaker 2: sitting back and being the quiet, little good girl in

521
00:20:29,241 --> 00:20:31,080
Speaker 2: the corner just agreeing and saying yes to everything to

522
00:20:31,120 --> 00:20:32,080
Speaker 2: make everyone else happy.

523
00:20:32,600 --> 00:20:36,920
Speaker 4: No rising, Yeah, big gacious.

524
00:20:36,360 --> 00:20:38,840
Speaker 2: They're okay to harbord posing opinions on them. They're still

525
00:20:38,840 --> 00:20:41,561
Speaker 2: going to stand their ground and share their opinion set.

526
00:20:41,441 --> 00:20:43,520
Speaker 1: Up for what they believe in. Yeah, well in who

527
00:20:43,561 --> 00:20:46,360
Speaker 1: they are, that's exactly right. We hope this helps you

528
00:20:46,721 --> 00:20:47,480
Speaker 1: enjoy that attention.

529
00:20:48,640 --> 00:20:50,721
Speaker 2: Do you have any situations like this or any other

530
00:20:50,761 --> 00:20:51,241
Speaker 2: topics to.

531
00:20:51,201 --> 00:20:52,721
Speaker 1: Expand on this? We'd love to know. You can always

532
00:20:52,761 --> 00:20:53,401
Speaker 1: jump into as She.

533
00:20:53,441 --> 00:20:56,321
Speaker 2: Rises for them, just on Facebook search She Rises and

534
00:20:56,360 --> 00:20:57,361
Speaker 2: you can add yourself in there.

535
00:20:57,561 --> 00:20:59,561
Speaker 4: Absolutely, have a good date and we'll see you on

536
00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:08,160
Speaker 4: the next one. Good Bye, bye,