Speaker 1: We'd like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land
Speaker 1: on which this podcast was produced, the Galligle people of
Speaker 1: the Urination. We pay our respects to elders past and present.
Speaker 2: It's March twenty twenty two and we're on top of
Speaker 2: a cliff on the south coast of New South Wales.
Speaker 2: I'm there along with the other members of the DS
Speaker 2: to announce the fate of the final three says recruits.
Speaker 2: For the last fourteen days, they've been pushed to their physical,
Speaker 2: psychological and emotional limits. Number seven, Rhanna Korean, is anxiously
Speaker 2: waiting shoulder to shoulder with Darius Boyd and Millie Boil.
Speaker 2: We started with fourteen hopeful recruits and now just three remain.
Speaker 2: It's time to break the news. You have all passed selection.
Speaker 2: With five cracked ribs and a broken finger, Rhianna smiles
Speaker 2: from ear to ear despite the pain. But this isn't
Speaker 2: Rihanna's first time smiling through the pain. I'm Att Middleton
Speaker 2: and this is head Game today. Rhianna Krean on the
Speaker 2: hardest year of her life. My next guess on the
Speaker 2: head Game is none other than number seven. No, it's
Speaker 2: not number seven. The SAS days are coming back and
Speaker 2: she's sweating in front of me right now. So we
Speaker 2: will dive into that, but we have Rihanna Crean super
Speaker 2: honored to have you here and on my podcast.
Speaker 3: Rhanna.
Speaker 2: Now we go back quite some especially with me screaming
Speaker 2: and shouting at you on SAS Australia and you obviously
Speaker 2: making it to the end and passing the selection process.
Speaker 2: How are you have you recovered? Oh?
Speaker 4: Look, and I'm good to say.
Speaker 3: I'm not sure anyone will ever recover from SAS Australia,
Speaker 3: but there is probably the number one question I get
Speaker 3: asked when you know, people see me, particularly at work
Speaker 3: at supercar events, is what was says like?
Speaker 4: Was it really real? Is he mean that? They're like
Speaker 4: the three consistent questions?
Speaker 2: So is he really the a hole that he comes
Speaker 2: to thought?
Speaker 4: He's like a gentle giant, absolutely not mean at all.
Speaker 3: But look, very fond memories I think aunt from our
Speaker 3: time there and an experience that I'm incredibly grateful to
Speaker 3: have had because just yeah, there's no other way that
Speaker 3: you'd actually get to experience what we experience. And it's
Speaker 3: hard to actually explain to people what it was like
Speaker 3: because unless you were there and in amongst it and
Speaker 3: sharing those same memories.
Speaker 4: It's very hard to put into words, but yeah, fond.
Speaker 3: Memories in inverted commas, and it's a great honor to
Speaker 3: be on.
Speaker 4: Your pod aunt.
Speaker 2: You've had a few difficult years leading up to SAS,
Speaker 2: which we'd talk about briefly, but talk to me about
Speaker 2: your childhood and where it sort of all started. Where
Speaker 2: you were a fun loving sort of speed demon, because yeah,
Speaker 2: because of the cars at a young age, or we
Speaker 2: just have a normal childhood.
Speaker 3: Oh, look, I would say it was a pretty normal childhood.
Speaker 3: I grew up in a really loving family. I've got
Speaker 3: an older sister and a younger brother, and my mum
Speaker 3: and dad were childhood sweethearts and were together I think
Speaker 3: when they were like fifteen and sixteen years old. And
Speaker 3: we grew up, you know, not wealthy, but us kids
Speaker 3: certainly never went without. My parents worked really really hard
Speaker 3: to ensure that we were given the best opportunities we
Speaker 3: could to succeed in life, and just had a really
Speaker 3: really loving family and loving childhood. I grew up on
Speaker 3: a farm, so I was outdoors all the time, dirty
Speaker 3: all the time, and I loved it. I'm very lucky
Speaker 3: that that was the childhood that I had. I did
Speaker 3: dancing as a young kid, and I think that those
Speaker 3: early days in dancing really in still a lot of
Speaker 3: the traits that I carry now with discipline and working
Speaker 3: hard and you know, competition and wanting to be to
Speaker 3: be the best in everything that I do. And I
Speaker 3: was dancing from a really young age, like I was.
Speaker 3: I think I was like eighteen months two years old
Speaker 3: and then you know right up through to I was
Speaker 3: sort of eighteen nineteen years old, and that was a
Speaker 3: really high level. So I think that that in my
Speaker 3: childhood really you know, put me in good shape to
Speaker 3: work hard and to strive for success. And seeing both
Speaker 3: of my parents just work really really hard in order
Speaker 3: to give us the best opportunities we could, you know,
Speaker 3: it's definitely shaped too. I am seeing my dad, you know,
Speaker 3: work on a farm, you know, three hundred and sixty
Speaker 3: five days a year.
Speaker 4: There was no days off for him.
Speaker 2: Ever.
Speaker 3: My mum was a registered nurse and she still is
Speaker 3: a registered nurse now to this day. So you know,
Speaker 3: they both would work very very hard and just made
Speaker 3: sure that us kids had everything we could possibly want.
Speaker 2: So you used to jump in the tractor drive.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, there was plenty of plenty of that. It
Speaker 4: was funny though.
Speaker 3: The motors spot thing came at a at a when
Speaker 3: I was older. I didn't have really any interest in
Speaker 3: motorsport out as a kid up, but I did grow
Speaker 3: up loving sport. I you know, did athletics, that did swimming,
Speaker 3: I did all those things that that kids do and
Speaker 3: I was pretty competitive in it as well. And the
Speaker 3: motorspot things sort of came into my life as a
Speaker 3: as an adult.
Speaker 4: But yeah, definitely on the farm there was you know,
Speaker 4: driving the light right on lawn mower.
Speaker 3: There was out in the dirt that was chasing sheep,
Speaker 3: you know, all that sort of stuff and just.
Speaker 4: A really very traditional Australian childhood.
Speaker 2: Do you know what. I love that because that's what
Speaker 2: all kids want to do al to me, isn't it
Speaker 2: as well? I've all around in the mud. They want
Speaker 2: that jump on the their a's lap and drive the
Speaker 2: tractor we left, you know, to sort of explore their
Speaker 2: small world, you know, without without anyone telling them what
Speaker 2: to do or that freedom. It does open your mind
Speaker 2: up to exploration. It does open your mind up to adventure,
Speaker 2: doesn't it.
Speaker 3: As a yeah, yeah, absolutely, And I think I just
Speaker 3: from I was always you know, from a young kid,
Speaker 3: just wanted to strive for more. Was always just searching
Speaker 3: to do more, and and you know, wanted to be
Speaker 3: the best at whatever I did. And I don't know
Speaker 3: if that was just came from you know, my parents
Speaker 3: or just from what I did when I was you know,
Speaker 3: it was dancing. Was that I didn't want to just
Speaker 3: you know, settle for just mediocre. And I think that
Speaker 3: that's sort of what's carried me throughout, you know, my years.
Speaker 2: Motorsport. How how did you get into motorsport? Because it's
Speaker 2: I suppose when you look at motorsport, it's such a
Speaker 2: segue from from you know, the country life and from
Speaker 2: being a down yeah, from being a dart all of
Speaker 2: a sudden, I suppose you know, the fast and furious
Speaker 2: pace of motorsport. How did you get into it?
Speaker 4: It was a situation that I kind of fell into.
Speaker 3: So at the time, I think I was eighteen or nineteen,
Speaker 3: I was still living in Perth with my family, and
Speaker 3: I finished school and I.
Speaker 4: Was going to go to UNI.
Speaker 3: But I went to UNI for a few months and
Speaker 3: then decided, no, I'm going to I'm going to take
Speaker 3: a step back. I'm going to do a few other
Speaker 3: things before I actually commit to go into university.
Speaker 4: And so I was doing just I was.
Speaker 3: Doing professional dancing work, I was doing modeling work, I
Speaker 3: was you know, working here and there, and then this
Speaker 3: opportunity came up and I used to have a competition
Speaker 3: called Miss V eight Supercar back in the day.
Speaker 4: Don't they don't have it.
Speaker 3: Anymore, sadly, the grid girls are starting to fade away,
Speaker 3: but back in that day, it was what two thousand
Speaker 3: and five, two thousand and six, and I.
Speaker 4: Entered the competition.
Speaker 3: Mum actually saw the ad and she's like, I think
Speaker 3: you should do this, So off I went and turns
Speaker 3: out I won the competition. So part of that was
Speaker 3: for the following twelve months, I would travel with the supercars,
Speaker 3: the Vight Supercars, go to all the events, work as
Speaker 3: an ambassador, so to speak. And I, you know, that
Speaker 3: was really my first ever sort of deep dive into
Speaker 3: what car racing was and learned very quickly that that
Speaker 3: I really loved it. And towards the end of the year,
Speaker 3: when you know that year was coming to an end,
Speaker 3: I sort of said to the people within the industry
Speaker 3: that I was interested in working in television.
Speaker 4: I'd done a lot of drama and.
Speaker 3: Musical theater when I was at school, and that was
Speaker 3: kind of a pathway that I wanted to head down.
Speaker 4: And I said, look, i'd like to work in TV.
Speaker 3: Do you think there's an opportunity for me to do
Speaker 3: some work experience somewhere? And they essentially said yes, and
Speaker 3: they said, if you can get yourself to the events,
Speaker 3: and you know, you've got to sort of find your way,
Speaker 3: and then we'll give you an opportunity. And the next
Speaker 3: year that's what I did. I you know, flew myself
Speaker 3: to the events. I'm not sure that it would be
Speaker 3: okay to do that now, like in terms of you're
Speaker 3: doing work experience, but you're covering all your expenses. But
Speaker 3: I got myself there. I created an opportunity for myself.
Speaker 3: I started, you know, working within the team, and then
Speaker 3: it's kind of just you know, snowballed after that, and
Speaker 3: I worked hard.
Speaker 4: I sort of decided that this is what I wanted
Speaker 4: to do and I.
Speaker 3: Created a job for myself essentially, But how was it
Speaker 3: going into an industry?
Speaker 2: You know, your blonde hair, blue eyes, and this is
Speaker 2: sort of a male dominant industry. How hard was it
Speaker 2: to break through into that industry.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was really hard, particularly you know, back then,
Speaker 3: which is you know, sort of mid two thousands. I
Speaker 3: suppose there wasn't necessarily as many women that you would
Speaker 3: see nowadays on TV, particularly working you know, in a
Speaker 3: sporting industry, particularly working in motorsport, which was predominantly male orientated,
Speaker 3: you know, industry, and very strong men who you know,
Speaker 3: like their cars, like their beer, that sort of thing.
Speaker 3: So for a you know, what was I at the time,
Speaker 3: I think I was nineteen years old. I'd come from
Speaker 3: this pageant background, you know, dancing, modeling, musical theater, long
Speaker 3: blonde hair.
Speaker 2: And just them to the slaughter.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and basically it was a lamb to the slaughter.
Speaker 3: So it was tough. Those first years were brutal. People
Speaker 3: are very unkind, very very unkind. And look, I certainly
Speaker 3: I was very green in my career as well, Like
Speaker 3: I wasn't I wasn't good. I was okay, I hadn't
Speaker 3: had a lot of experience. I hadn't gone to journalism
Speaker 3: at university and studied, and so you know, I was
Speaker 3: very very green in that industry, and I you know,
Speaker 3: I did I get got eaten alive? And there were
Speaker 3: times in those early days and they thought, is this
Speaker 3: all worth it? You know, other comments on Facebook worth it?
Speaker 3: Other comments that you hear behind your back worth it?
Speaker 3: And I suppose, luckily, I'm pretty thick skinned. I mean,
Speaker 3: there were certainly times where I, you know, would be
Speaker 3: crying in the bathroom, going why am I doing this
Speaker 3: to myself? But again it was like, this is what
Speaker 3: I want to do. I'm going to make sure that,
Speaker 3: you know, I do what I need to do to
Speaker 3: be successful. And it meant that I worked harder than
Speaker 3: other people. It meant that I knew that I had
Speaker 3: no leeway. I couldn't make a mistake because if I
Speaker 3: made a mistake that was.
Speaker 4: Yet I'd be gone.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 3: I wasn't given the same sort of leeway as some
Speaker 3: of the other people I was working.
Speaker 4: And that was fine. I understood that that was the case.
Speaker 3: But it just meant that I had to work harder
Speaker 3: and I had to make sure that I was, you know,
Speaker 3: on my A game all the time, and any anytime
Speaker 3: I did make a mistake, it was it was coming
Speaker 3: for me, that's for sure.
Speaker 2: Perseverance what made you continue to persevere and what was
Speaker 2: the turning point where you were I don't want to
Speaker 2: say finally accepted, but where you felt like actually, you know,
Speaker 2: you felt part of the crew, you felt part of
Speaker 2: the team, and through your perseverance, when was that to
Speaker 2: an end point?
Speaker 4: Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 3: I mean I think it would have been easier for
Speaker 3: me to quit, particularly in those early days, Like I
Speaker 3: had certainly bosses that were working the back in the
Speaker 3: day that said to me, you know, look, I think
Speaker 3: you've done a really you've done a solid job, but
Speaker 3: this is probably the end of the road for you.
Speaker 4: Like, I just can't see you go any any further.
Speaker 3: I can't see a woman ever being in pit lane
Speaker 3: for us, I can't see a female ever like fronting
Speaker 3: our coverage. And so in the easier thing would be
Speaker 3: to just shake his hand and say thanks very much
Speaker 3: for the opportunity and go and do something else, but
Speaker 3: I didn't. I sort of turned that into I'll shure
Speaker 3: you mate.
Speaker 2: You know I've seen that side kind of use a.
Speaker 4: Few different words, but we'll keep it up. And it
Speaker 4: was like, you know, o case, I'm going to prove what.
Speaker 3: You guys are trying to doubt me for and and
Speaker 3: keep fighting and keep you know, working my way throughout
Speaker 3: the broadcast, and eventually was given an opportunity by you know,
Speaker 3: another boss, to step up into the main broadcast, so
Speaker 3: to speak. And and that was very scary. It was
Speaker 3: I was very nervous. I still wasn't you know, I
Speaker 3: still wasn't great at what I was doing, but that
Speaker 3: he gave me, he gave me a shot, and I
Speaker 3: really needed to make sure that I made the most
Speaker 3: of that opportunity. And that was probably the point where
Speaker 3: I thought, I didn't think I'd made it, but I
Speaker 3: was like, I think, like, I'm on the right path this,
Speaker 3: I'm doing what I should be doing.
Speaker 2: Throughout your career, you've dealt with a lot. You've certainly
Speaker 2: come through everything that's been put in front of you,
Speaker 2: your one hundred percent survivor. You had the toughest year
Speaker 2: of your life, didn't you in twenty twenty before you
Speaker 2: came on SAS. And you know, I could see it
Speaker 2: in your eyes that you know, there was some pain,
Speaker 2: there was some suffering that you really wanted to sort
Speaker 2: of purge or deal with. Take me back to twenty
Speaker 2: twenty and that year of hell for you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I think so many people can probably relate.
Speaker 3: You know, twenty twenty was such a horrible year for
Speaker 3: so many reasons. Obviously COVID was one of.
Speaker 4: The biggest reasons.
Speaker 3: And you know, the start of the year at my
Speaker 3: industry in terms of in terms of motorsport all started
Speaker 3: to shut down and things were starting to look pretty
Speaker 3: grim in terms of you know, how are we going
Speaker 3: to continue racing, how are going to continue working My
Speaker 3: husband Will, who races in v Itsu, because his team
Speaker 3: actually shut down at the start of the year, so
Speaker 3: he was essentially left unemployed totally out of his control
Speaker 3: at the start of the year, which was a huge
Speaker 3: blow for us as a family. And then I actually
Speaker 3: got parked as well from my work because there just
Speaker 3: wasn't the ability to take everyone traveling throughout the country
Speaker 3: given you know, all of the lockdowns that Australia was
Speaker 3: going through at the time, so it was like a
Speaker 3: double blow in terms of both of us for employment.
Speaker 4: And then I got a horrible phone call, a.
Speaker 3: Phone call I'll never ever forget, from my sister to
Speaker 3: say that my dad had had an event and wasn't
Speaker 3: likely to survive. So we had to get to Perth.
Speaker 3: We live in We live in Queensland, so that was
Speaker 3: you know, up there was one of the worst days
Speaker 3: of my life. And then we had to deal with
Speaker 3: the challenge of the lockdowns in Australia at the time,
Speaker 3: and you know, trying to get into Perth was a
Speaker 3: challenge in itself. There was so few flights at the time,
Speaker 3: and you know, we had to really basically, you know,
Speaker 3: plead with the West Australian government to allow us to
Speaker 3: come in so that I could see my dad.
Speaker 4: And we were lucky, we were very lucky.
Speaker 3: We were somehow got a lady who was just very
Speaker 3: understanding and very empathetic, and you know, she made it work.
Speaker 3: So we were able to fly to Perth a couple
Speaker 3: of days later when there was a flight. But you know,
Speaker 3: I knew that we were flying there to say goodbye.
Speaker 3: It was it wasn't it wasn't going to be a
Speaker 3: flight for anything else. It was just going to be
Speaker 3: a flight that we would have to say goodbye to
Speaker 3: my dad. And so that was you know, that was
Speaker 3: absolutely the hardest, the hardest day of my life.
Speaker 2: What was it like during those two days of knowing
Speaker 2: that that your father was wasn't going to make it.
Speaker 2: But knowing that, you know, those two days of waiting
Speaker 2: and anticipation and obviously thoughts going through your head, you know,
Speaker 2: of maybe not making it. What would those two days.
Speaker 3: Like oh hard to put into words, and like obviously
Speaker 3: just unimaginable grief and sadness, knowing you know what we
Speaker 3: were going to be facing when we got there, but
Speaker 3: just you know, so much anger at the world, so
Speaker 3: much anger at you know, governments in Australia for locking
Speaker 3: people away and closing borders, and you know, such mixed
Speaker 3: feelings because obviously, you know, at the time, you know,
Speaker 3: everybody believed that that was the best thing for the
Speaker 3: country in order to be known, for people not to
Speaker 3: be spreading things around. But you know, when you're on
Speaker 3: the raw end of that, it was just anger, you know,
Speaker 3: I just he just hated everyone. You hated, hated what
Speaker 3: was happening, Hated the world, hated this horrible viruls, hated
Speaker 3: the fact that you know, people were getting locked away
Speaker 3: from their family, and so you know, two days of
Speaker 3: just living in that space was was horrible. It's truly
Speaker 3: why it was. It's I don't have any other words
Speaker 3: to describe, but it was just like watching a clock
Speaker 3: that was ticking so slowly, waiting, waiting for those minutes
Speaker 3: to tick by, waiting for those seconds to tick by,
Speaker 3: knowing that you know, we were hopeful that I would
Speaker 3: get there so that I could say goodbye, but that
Speaker 3: also wasn't a guarantee. So you know, we were sitting
Speaker 3: in this space of you know, am I going to
Speaker 3: actually be allowed to go there? Am I going to
Speaker 3: make it in time to actually say goodbye to him?
Speaker 3: You know, hurry up and just please let us get there. Yeah,
Speaker 3: So it was there was so many emotions at the time.
Speaker 3: And also and I hadn't even at the time, We
Speaker 3: were just living in that, we were living in those minutes.
Speaker 3: We weren't even thinking about what this actually means, you know,
Speaker 3: moving forward, and you know the fact that you know,
Speaker 3: going to lose dad and our family was broken, you know, forever,
Speaker 3: our family would be broken because of this situation. So yeah,
Speaker 3: it was horrible, but you know, at the same time,
Speaker 3: I look back and I'm.
Speaker 4: Forever grateful that I got to say goodbye.
Speaker 3: There were so many people at that time that couldn't
Speaker 3: travel to see family, when able to have that final goodbye,
Speaker 3: when't able to go to funerals. So you know, I
Speaker 3: consider myself incredibly lucky that I had that. I had
Speaker 3: that opportunity to say goodbye to him. I had the time,
Speaker 3: you know, I had the opportunity to go to Dad's funeral.
Speaker 3: We were able to have because we were in Perth.
Speaker 3: Their restrictions weren't so bad, so we were actually able
Speaker 3: to have a funeral for him. So, you know, I,
Speaker 3: as much as it was the worst time of our life,
Speaker 3: I do look back now and think, you know, I
Speaker 3: am lucky I had that, because I don't know how
Speaker 3: it would have been if I was denied that opportunity.
Speaker 3: You know, Will and I we flew from Queensland to Perth,
Speaker 3: which was, you know, probably one of the worst flights
Speaker 3: I've ever been on. You know, I didn't know that,
Speaker 3: you know, all of a sudden, You've got no wife, I,
Speaker 3: you've got no connection and it's a you know, five
Speaker 3: and ars six hour flight to Perth. So for that
Speaker 3: period of time, again, it was just like a horrible
Speaker 3: waiting game, looking up the seconds of the clock, looking
Speaker 3: at the minutes of the clock and knowing that, you
Speaker 3: know what if when we land, I get the phone
Speaker 3: call to say you know, we haven't made it on time,
Speaker 3: so so that in and.
Speaker 4: Itself was awful.
Speaker 3: And then yeah, you know, arriving to the hospital, we
Speaker 3: were able to see him in the ICU.
Speaker 4: He was, you know, he was he was.
Speaker 3: Not conscious, he was I like to think he knew
Speaker 3: that we were there, but you know, obviously we'll never know.
Speaker 4: And maybe he did know because he hung.
Speaker 3: On you know, we got there and I had a
Speaker 3: few moments with him before we lost him, so maybe
Speaker 3: he did know.
Speaker 4: That we were coming and we were on that plane.
Speaker 3: So but yeah, you know, we had to say goodbye,
Speaker 3: and then I suppose after that it was dealing with
Speaker 3: what lost, but also then having to quarantine for two
Speaker 3: weeks because they're stupid, stupid rules at the time, So
Speaker 3: you know, I spent two weeks then quarantined after saying
Speaker 3: goodbye to Dad, which was in itself pretty rubbish situation
Speaker 3: to be in.
Speaker 2: But they know you by yourself.
Speaker 3: I was with Will, so you know, we I wasn't
Speaker 3: totally by myself, but yeah, it was.
Speaker 4: It was pretty rough.
Speaker 3: You know, sometimes you just want to go for a
Speaker 3: drive to the beach or like just go for a
Speaker 3: walk and get out of the fresh air.
Speaker 4: And we weren't able to do that, so that made
Speaker 4: that pretty tricky.
Speaker 3: But look, I'm I'm I'm very lucky and I've got
Speaker 3: the most I hit the jackpot with my family, you know,
Speaker 3: like my mom, my brother, my sister, you.
Speaker 4: Know, my dad.
Speaker 3: We were all in We all are incredibly the host.
Speaker 3: We speak to each other every single day. We are
Speaker 3: absolutely each other's biggest supporter. And and I know how
Speaker 3: like I am that I have that, and so you
Speaker 3: know that time was the worst time for us. But
Speaker 3: but at the same time, you know, we we have
Speaker 3: each other and we always have been like that. So
Speaker 3: you know, you've, as you said, you know, you've got
Speaker 3: to you've got to be able to pull positives out
Speaker 3: of pretty shitty situations because otherwise you will spiral. And
Speaker 3: I suppose I am I'm grateful that I have that
Speaker 3: in me. I'm able to to see that, you know,
Speaker 3: when when the days are dark, that there's always still hope,
Speaker 3: because if you haven't, if you don't have hope, you know,
Speaker 3: it's it's pretty grim.
Speaker 4: So you know, we've just always looked at what we have,
Speaker 4: and we have.
Speaker 3: Each other, and you know, we had amazing times with Dad.
Speaker 3: We had an amazing childhood and and you know, I'm lucky.
Speaker 4: That I had that.
Speaker 2: So you and your husband both lost your jobs, your
Speaker 2: your father passes away, you're lockdown, and you still manage
Speaker 2: to come through a positive mindset all the way to
Speaker 2: twenty twenty one, where you decided to do an Iron
Speaker 2: Man out of everything that could have possibly have gone wrong.
Speaker 2: You what, when did that decision, you know, come into fruition?
Speaker 2: When did you think, right, listen, enough's enough, We've got
Speaker 2: to get back in the game. Yeah, I'm gonna do it,
Speaker 2: and I am. I can understand a half marathon, maybe
Speaker 2: a maraffon or maybe a little fun run or something,
Speaker 2: but yeah, an iron that's hardcore. I owe you a
Speaker 2: hardcore anyway, because I've seen it firsthand. But you know,
Speaker 2: someone that's looking from the outside in your situation of
Speaker 2: of of trauma, of dread, of you know, of looking
Speaker 2: into this dark cloud, and all of a sudden you
Speaker 2: pop out of it and you go, right, this is
Speaker 2: what I'm gonna do? What? What? What the hell made
Speaker 2: you you decide to do that?
Speaker 3: Well, to be honest with you, you know, there there
Speaker 3: was dark days. There was really dark days, and there
Speaker 3: was weeks where I didn't you know, feel like I
Speaker 3: had not that I didn't have anything to live, but
Speaker 3: you know, I didn't have some purpose so to speak.
Speaker 4: You know, I'd lost my job.
Speaker 3: I had this horrible you know, trauma with my dad,
Speaker 3: and it was kind of like, well what now, Like
Speaker 3: I don't even have a job to do, Like what
Speaker 3: am I going to do? And you know, I'd always
Speaker 3: like to keep fit, and i'd done if you know,
Speaker 3: I've done some trifleons and things.
Speaker 4: Like that in the past.
Speaker 3: And and there was a good couple of weeks where
Speaker 3: I literally just didn't get out of bed because facing
Speaker 3: the world was too hard at the time. You know,
Speaker 3: it just I didn't have the energy to be sad.
Speaker 3: I didn't have the energy to be happy. I just
Speaker 3: wanted to just sit in, you know, in that space
Speaker 3: I needed and I needed to I really did need
Speaker 3: to do that. But you know, then it came a
Speaker 3: point where I'm like, I need to I can't do this.
Speaker 3: You know, my dad wouldn't want any.
Speaker 4: Of us to be just sitting here and not living.
Speaker 3: You know. He was all about living and doing you know,
Speaker 3: crazy things, and always you know, was you know, the
Speaker 3: life of the party and was always the person that
Speaker 3: was helping other people.
Speaker 4: And and I.
Speaker 3: Just I just entered a nine man and I'm right,
Speaker 3: this is this is going to be my purpose for
Speaker 3: the next you know.
Speaker 4: However, many months I was going.
Speaker 2: To get into or do you just go, I'm just
Speaker 2: going to into an eye am out it's high school.
Speaker 3: I had a little bit of a and I actually no,
Speaker 3: I did have an idea, but yeah, once I started
Speaker 3: the training, like oh wow, this is like this is
Speaker 3: this is a lot lot of training. But it was
Speaker 3: my reason. You know, it was my thing that every
Speaker 3: day I didn't have an excuse. I couldn't lay in
Speaker 3: bed all day. I needed to get up and do
Speaker 3: the training. I had to get up and ride my
Speaker 3: bike or go for a run. And I mean, you
Speaker 3: know what it's like, and you know, just the endorphins
Speaker 3: and feeling physically good makes you feel mentally good and
Speaker 3: and just spark something within you when you when you
Speaker 3: get moving and when you start to accomplish things like okay,
Speaker 3: I've just done a ten k run, or now I've
Speaker 3: done a fourteen k run, or now I've done this,
Speaker 3: and you know that all of a sudden, you've got
Speaker 3: that you know.
Speaker 4: That that feel good energy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and that purpose and and that's really what got
Speaker 3: me through those next few months was the fact that
Speaker 3: you know, after so much sad and bad news and darkness,
Speaker 3: that you know, I had some something to work towards.
Speaker 3: And the Trithon community is such a beautiful community. You know,
Speaker 3: people from all walks of life are doing trifle, you know,
Speaker 3: and I've just found it. It's such a beautiful bunch
Speaker 3: of people that are so supportive. And I really got
Speaker 3: into the spirit of it. I was, you know, training
Speaker 3: every single day. I had a coach who set me
Speaker 3: out my program and told me what I needed to do,
Speaker 3: and yeah, just got stuck in.
Speaker 2: You know what. I love that And I love what
Speaker 2: you mentioned there about just getting up and moving. And
Speaker 2: that's why you hear me shout on essays, because just
Speaker 2: that action, you know, no matter how down you feel.
Speaker 2: And I always say this to people who ask for
Speaker 2: a bit of advice when they say to me, and
Speaker 2: you know, I can't get off the couch, I can't
Speaker 2: get out of bed, and I say, just move. It's
Speaker 2: so important that when you're feeling like this, when you
Speaker 2: feel like you know you can't go on, and that
Speaker 2: life is too much, and so all I say to
Speaker 2: people is move. And like you said as well, when
Speaker 2: you move, it stimulates the mind because guess what, when
Speaker 2: you actually move, you are problem solving, you know, a
Speaker 2: hundred things at once. You know, just we're subconsciously, where
Speaker 2: am I going to put my foot? How am I
Speaker 2: going to balance myself? How am I going to stand up?
Speaker 2: You know, you subconsciously your mind kicks in and it
Speaker 2: triggers stuff. And obviously you moved in quite a drastic
Speaker 2: and challenging way.
Speaker 3: You don't necessarily need do an I am but exactly,
Speaker 3: but yeah, it is. It's just that it's feeling of
Speaker 3: accomplishment as well. And you know, even now I've had
Speaker 3: some we've had a pretty rough start to the year.
Speaker 3: My mum's been unwell, and and you know, I would
Speaker 3: run every day even though we you know, we're visiting
Speaker 3: her in the hospital, and people would say, you know,
Speaker 3: why are you bother running? And I'm like, because that's
Speaker 3: what that's what I need. I need to do that,
Speaker 3: you know, I need. You know, some people listen to
Speaker 3: loud music, some people will meditate, something more might do yoga,
Speaker 3: you know, some people whatever. But like, yeah, for me
Speaker 3: movement and it doesn't have to be in that I'm
Speaker 3: smashing myself and doing a marathon. It's just I just
Speaker 3: need to get out and just be you know, be
Speaker 3: outside and just moving, and that's what gets me through,
Speaker 3: you know, the tough times.
Speaker 2: So moving on to the Iron Man, how did you do? Look?
Speaker 3: I did okay. I had no I had no goal,
Speaker 3: not even have a goal. I wanted to finish.
Speaker 2: That was my goal.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I wanted to complete it.
Speaker 3: I didn't have any you know, time in my head
Speaker 3: that I needed to be done by, and to be honest,
Speaker 3: I just wanted to get to the start line. Because
Speaker 3: if anyone's ever you know, done an iron Man, they
Speaker 3: understand that. You know, the training in itself is probably
Speaker 3: the most difficult part. You know, you're training for a
Speaker 3: three point eight k swim, one hundred and eighty k
Speaker 3: bike ride, and then a marathon to finish forty two ks.
Speaker 3: So to train for that event, you know, you need
Speaker 3: to be doing two three four hours a day of
Speaker 3: training to be able just to get through. So I
Speaker 3: wanted to get to the start line without being injured
Speaker 3: and without you know, burning myself out. And I knew
Speaker 3: that once I got to the star art line that
Speaker 3: I would get to the finish line. I knew that
Speaker 3: I would finish it regardless of how long it would
Speaker 3: take me.
Speaker 4: And I did.
Speaker 3: I finished it okay. I had a pretty good swim.
Speaker 3: My ride was okay. It was a pretty windy day,
Speaker 3: so that was that. There was times during that ride
Speaker 3: where I wanted to throw my bike off.
Speaker 4: The off the bridge and never ever see it again.
Speaker 3: And then the run for me, I always that's probably
Speaker 3: my weakest leg. So I knew that, you know, it
Speaker 3: was just going to be a bit of a shuffle,
Speaker 3: like a walk jog type thing. And and once I
Speaker 3: got onto the run leg, you know you're essentially at
Speaker 3: the end, even though you've got you know, a marathon
Speaker 3: to go. But I knew that if I got to
Speaker 3: that point, I would a one hundred percent get to
Speaker 3: the end and got to the end and cross the
Speaker 3: finish line. And I actually I sculled a VB beer
Speaker 3: For Australians, I'll understand a VB isn't usually the first
Speaker 3: choice of beer, but that was my dad's favorite beer.
Speaker 4: And on my hand throughout the.
Speaker 3: Day, i'd written I'd written a little message in Penn
Speaker 3: so I knew that there was you know, there was
Speaker 3: going to be moments during the day that we're going
Speaker 3: to be tough, and I needed to hang on because
Speaker 3: Dad hung on for me. So that was kind of
Speaker 3: what got me through throughout the day and across the
Speaker 3: finish lane and skull the beer and yeah, that one
Speaker 3: was for Dad.
Speaker 2: What I love about an iron Man is that you
Speaker 2: know what you're doing. You just said about the swim,
Speaker 2: the cycle, the run. However, Sas Australia you are chucked
Speaker 2: into the fold their fear of the unknown, the fear
Speaker 2: of not being good enough, fear you know, you don't
Speaker 2: know what's happening, you don't know what's around the corner,
Speaker 2: you don't know how to prepare, you can't prepare. Did
Speaker 2: you think that the Iron Man prepared you for Sas.
Speaker 4: No, look yes and no.
Speaker 3: Like in some ways it kind of like obviously cardio
Speaker 3: fitness it prepared.
Speaker 4: It is fair. I hear that the emotional side, look
Speaker 4: not not completely.
Speaker 3: I think it put me in good shape to be
Speaker 3: on the show. I think, you know, an iron Man's
Speaker 3: not easy. It's it's a hard it's a hard thing
Speaker 3: to do, and and it's you're on your own, you know,
Speaker 3: particularly when you're on the bike.
Speaker 4: You're on the bike.
Speaker 3: I was on the bike for six and a half hours.
Speaker 3: So you're on the bike for six and a half hours,
Speaker 3: not talking to anyone. You don't have the ability to
Speaker 3: listen to music or listen to a podcast. It's you,
Speaker 3: your bike and your thoughts.
Speaker 2: The opportunity to listen to head game, you know, what
Speaker 2: do you think come first?
Speaker 3: And but it's you know, that's a long time where
Speaker 3: you're in the hurt lock are you Your legs are
Speaker 3: screaming at you. You know, your back's locked up, everything's hurting,
Speaker 3: and and you've got your thoughts. And so in a
Speaker 3: way I suppose I had, you know, a taste of
Speaker 3: of that kind of mentality and the taste of being
Speaker 3: in that space where it's like you've just got to
Speaker 3: lock in and you've just got to keep going.
Speaker 4: But yeah, nothing nothing in.
Speaker 3: The world we can prepare me for Australia, like literally nothing,
Speaker 3: no podcast.
Speaker 4: We'll get you through that show.
Speaker 2: I love it. So when did the call come up?
Speaker 2: Let's get straight into it. When did that caol come up?
Speaker 3: So?
Speaker 2: Did you feel fit? Did you feel excited? No? I'm
Speaker 2: an idiot.
Speaker 3: My manager called me, and it was at the time
Speaker 3: where my work was still sort of I was in
Speaker 3: a bit of a weird spot because of COVID and
Speaker 3: we still hadn't like gone back to regular you know,
Speaker 3: regular travel for what I was doing.
Speaker 4: And my manager called me is like, look, there's a
Speaker 4: show Essays Australia. You've seen it. I'm like, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 4: what shirit? Do you want to do it? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Sure?
Speaker 4: Why not? I was like, okay, okay.
Speaker 3: He's like, I'll call you in ten minutes and he
Speaker 3: literally called me back and he's like, you're in. So
Speaker 3: I didn't think about it at all. And then when
Speaker 3: I told Will my husband, he's like, are you joking?
Speaker 2: Why would you say yes?
Speaker 4: And so that was it.
Speaker 3: I think I think we had six weeks maybe before
Speaker 3: the show started. I think there was a like, I
Speaker 3: think that was the lead up time, six weeks, eight
Speaker 3: weeks maybe at most. So I knew that I was
Speaker 3: going to be okay in terms of cardio fitness, Like
Speaker 3: I knew that I could swim, I could run all that.
Speaker 4: Sort of stuff.
Speaker 3: As you can see, these these guns aren't really really
Speaker 3: built for lifting. So I got myself into the gym
Speaker 3: and just picked up heavy shit basically by exactly and
Speaker 3: knew that that was going to be my weakness, so
Speaker 3: just lifted sandbags and weights as much as my body
Speaker 3: would allow me to without getting injured.
Speaker 4: And then that was it. That was that was the show.
Speaker 2: And take me back to day one. How did that feel?
Speaker 3: It was terrifying, and you know, you didn't know how
Speaker 3: the show was going to work, so to speak. I mean,
Speaker 3: I'd come from a television background, so I had an
Speaker 3: idea of how they make TV.
Speaker 2: You mean, the course. You didn't know how that.
Speaker 4: We didn't know how the course was going to play out.
Speaker 3: And and you know, as you hear about how shows
Speaker 3: are filmed, you know other reality TV shows are filmed
Speaker 3: and it's like okay, you know that they'll do a
Speaker 3: scene and then it's like the producible interrupt and then
Speaker 3: you know a director will say on and we've got
Speaker 3: to do that again. Or but yeah, obviously that wasn't
Speaker 3: That wasn't how sas Australia worked. It was once once
Speaker 3: you told us to get off that boat, you know,
Speaker 3: we were in your world and.
Speaker 4: And it was terrifying. It was truly terrifying.
Speaker 3: It was very intimidating, obviously, not just from yourself and
Speaker 3: from the other directing staff, but from the people that
Speaker 3: I was on the course with. You know, I was
Speaker 3: you know, I'm not a known person in the media.
Speaker 4: I'm not an athlete. I'm not an Olympian.
Speaker 3: And you know, you're standing there and you're looking around
Speaker 3: and you've got Jeff Hugel there. You know, You've got
Speaker 3: Melissa Wu there, We've got Wayne Kerr. We had Barry Hall,
Speaker 3: you know, we had Marcu Zarafa, like, we had so
Speaker 3: many people that were these incredible athletes who had had
Speaker 3: enormous success in their life, and I'm sort of standing
Speaker 3: there looking at them, like, how on earth am I
Speaker 3: supposed to even remotely be, you know, considered on the
Speaker 3: same playing field as these people around me and big
Speaker 3: personalities who you know, we're quite overwhelming when you first
Speaker 3: get in because everyone you know is wanting to, you know,
Speaker 3: have their voice heard.
Speaker 4: And I'm I'm quite a quite shy person in real life,
Speaker 4: even though I work in TV.
Speaker 3: In my you know, in my personal life, I'm not
Speaker 3: the loudest person in the room, and if anything, I
Speaker 3: like to be the quietest person in the room, particularly
Speaker 3: when I don't know.
Speaker 4: People, so I think I that's what I did.
Speaker 3: I was pretty quiet, didn't you know, didn't want to
Speaker 3: make too much noise and just sort of go under
Speaker 3: the radar and try not to get your attention, because
Speaker 3: if you've got your attention, usually it's because you've done
Speaker 3: something wrong.
Speaker 2: Correct very wise, I would say, what's it like amongst
Speaker 2: the you know, from the very first day, what's it
Speaker 2: like amongst the recruits.
Speaker 3: I mean, it was pretty obvious from the art set,
Speaker 3: you know who was going to be the not ourphas,
Speaker 3: but like the louder people, the people that sort of
Speaker 3: speak the most and put themselves forward the most. It
Speaker 3: was quite obvious you know who those people were going
Speaker 3: to be. But to be peavitly honest, I felt like
Speaker 3: our group was a really supportive group for the most part.
Speaker 4: Everyone was a big supporter of each other.
Speaker 3: There wasn't necessarily anyone who was trying to be the
Speaker 3: best or always you know, wanting to you know, out
Speaker 3: race or outdo anyone else, like I felt like, particularly
Speaker 3: particularly the guys like Barry Hall and Darius Boyd and
Speaker 3: Wayne Carey, Jeff Yugel, like, they were all very good supporters,
Speaker 3: particularly of us girls, even though they might be stronger
Speaker 3: than us and be able to carry heavier things than us,
Speaker 3: like they were always our biggest champions, you know, throughout
Speaker 3: the tasks and always wanting to make sure that we
Speaker 3: didn't ever feel that we were lesser than those guys.
Speaker 4: And I think it showed at the end of the
Speaker 4: show when there was.
Speaker 3: More women than men towards the end, I think it
Speaker 3: really did show that we were we were successful because
Speaker 3: we had people, you know, supporting us so much, you know,
Speaker 3: right from the outset.
Speaker 2: That's why everything is put on a base level. That's
Speaker 2: why there's no heavier weight in the women's burg or
Speaker 2: heavier weight in the men's burg, and in the women's burg,
Speaker 2: because we're testing you physically, psychologically, and emotionally. Yes, the
Speaker 2: men might be physically stronger and maybe I wouldn't say fitter,
Speaker 2: but physically stronger, but when it comes to the psychological
Speaker 2: side and the emotional side, it would be unfair to
Speaker 2: make it easier for women on the physical side because
Speaker 2: actually psychologically and emotionally one, you don't know what's going
Speaker 2: on up there or what people are been through, so
Speaker 2: you know, that's that's a level playing field, and that
Speaker 2: the emotional side, from what I've seen is that women
Speaker 2: actually deal with their emotions a little bit better than mey.
Speaker 2: So you know, it's important that people realize that. That's
Speaker 2: why we keep the course the way it is and
Speaker 2: there's everyone's on the same playing field, because when we
Speaker 2: test you physically, psychologically and emotionally, if you've if there's
Speaker 2: a disconnect between the trilogy and you, you can't hack
Speaker 2: it psychologically, then you're gone. Emotionally, if you can't do
Speaker 2: some of the fear defying tests and heights, water phobias,
Speaker 2: you're gone. Physically, if you're not up to scratch, you're gone.
Speaker 2: So did you when did you start to sort of
Speaker 2: because you sort of came into your flow after the
Speaker 2: first four or five days. You see people you know
Speaker 2: who are who you thought, wow, are going to be
Speaker 2: here at the end start leaving, yeah, and you start
Speaker 2: to get into your flow, don't you start to realize,
Speaker 2: do you know what, I've just got to let go.
Speaker 2: I've just got to embrace the embrace the course and
Speaker 2: let myself let myself go.
Speaker 3: And I think that's the key, to be honest, is
Speaker 3: that just knowing that you've got to you know, just
Speaker 3: let let the show take care of itself, like you've
Speaker 3: lost all control, Like you can't you don't choose when
Speaker 3: you eat, you don't get to choose when you're sleep,
Speaker 3: you don't get to choose what you're doing. You don't
Speaker 3: know what's happening, you don't have any sort of idea
Speaker 3: of how the day is going to roll out. And
Speaker 3: the minute that I was able to in my head
Speaker 3: go relinquish control and just deal with the situations as
Speaker 3: they come, I think that's when you really start to
Speaker 3: be able to just process things, you know, in time.
Speaker 3: So it's like, Okay, this is the task we're doing now, Yeah,
Speaker 3: be present and this is the task we're doing. Now.
Speaker 3: Deal with this task and everything else that comes after
Speaker 3: it will deal with that after, Like this is we're
Speaker 3: eating now, Like eat your food now, and then think
Speaker 3: about what's happening after that. And and I think that
Speaker 3: you know, that definitely took a couple of days just
Speaker 3: to get used to that and get used to the
Speaker 3: fact that you have no idea and you have no
Speaker 3: control over anything whatsoever.
Speaker 4: And you know, once you you do see some of
Speaker 4: the people like.
Speaker 3: Start to not struggle, but you know, there's areas in
Speaker 3: their life that you know they're you know, they might
Speaker 3: be really yeah, they might be really physically strong, but
Speaker 3: then they were able to do this particular tasking like Okay,
Speaker 3: well I'm I'm not the strongest, but I was able
Speaker 3: to do this, or you know, I'm able to you know,
Speaker 3: problem solve this, or I've been able to do yeah, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3: And that's when you know, after the first few days,
Speaker 3: I was like, Okay, I think I think I can
Speaker 3: get through this. And I knew in my head that
Speaker 3: I wasn't going to quit, Like there was no part
Speaker 3: of me that was going to give you my number.
Speaker 4: You would have had to take my number.
Speaker 3: And I didn't think that I would get to the end,
Speaker 3: but I didn't think that I would give up.
Speaker 4: I knew that you would have to get rid of me.
Speaker 2: Was there any stage that you thought that your number
Speaker 2: was close to coming off?
Speaker 3: I think at the end, I think it was the
Speaker 3: second last day or third last day, and we were
Speaker 3: down to four. We were down to four, and we
Speaker 3: were we were all tethered on the rope, and we
Speaker 3: went You took us to some like mud manslows, mangras,
Speaker 3: and it had been raining and it was freezing cold,
Speaker 3: and we were all tethered and we basically had to
Speaker 3: you know, run from one end to the other to
Speaker 3: retrieve the package or whatever it was.
Speaker 4: And if you submission times it was time sensitive.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you know, if you the whole idea of
Speaker 2: this was to I have a sacrifice yourself if yeah,
Speaker 2: you're holding the team back or the team had had
Speaker 2: to yeah.
Speaker 4: Say sort of times done.
Speaker 3: And we were carrying we also were carrying I think
Speaker 3: twenty kilos or something, and so you know, I felt
Speaker 3: like I was I could have done the task, but
Speaker 3: carrying the package as well as running through the swamp,
Speaker 3: I was starting to struggle physically, and we were with
Speaker 3: locky locks. So we had Lockey Gilbert, Darius Boy and
Speaker 3: Millie Boy or myself and Melissa were and Melissa was
Speaker 3: also starting to struggle and I think she got d
Speaker 3: like she got dropped. So then we were down to
Speaker 3: just the four of us, and it was it meant
Speaker 3: that Locke and Darius had to do a lot of
Speaker 3: the heavy lifting because I just wasn't able to physically
Speaker 3: hold the package as long as what they were able to.
Speaker 3: And you know, this is what like day twelve or
Speaker 3: something like.
Speaker 2: It was pretty quiet.
Speaker 3: It was quite Yeah, So there was a point there
Speaker 3: where I thought, is it better for me to not
Speaker 3: give up?
Speaker 4: But is it better?
Speaker 3: Is it better for the team that I that I, um,
Speaker 3: you know, unhook myself because I think I'm now starting
Speaker 3: to bring them down. And then I just this recurring
Speaker 3: thought in my head always throughout the whole entire time,
Speaker 3: was like this, this will end, Like this task is
Speaker 3: really hard now, but it will end and then you'll
Speaker 3: be done with it and you'll never have to do
Speaker 3: it again until the next time we do a task.
Speaker 3: But everything ends, you know, every beasting ended, and every
Speaker 3: task would end, and every you know, whatever it was.
Speaker 3: And in my head I'm like, no, don't quit now,
Speaker 3: Like what we might have another ten minutes, you might
Speaker 3: have another hour, but it's not forever, Like you can
Speaker 3: hang on.
Speaker 2: I figure, I smashed you for the good five k
Speaker 2: through their angos and then.
Speaker 3: You made us run back to the vehicles as well afterwards.
Speaker 3: But that was probably the only time throughout it, all
Speaker 3: of it where I was very close to going. I
Speaker 3: think that I need to sacrifice myself because the team
Speaker 3: is now starting to you know, it becomes slower because
Speaker 3: of me.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was it like standing there at the end,
Speaker 2: so they you stood there, did you care if your
Speaker 2: past or failed at this stage?
Speaker 3: I did, Yeah, I think because you got so far
Speaker 3: and I would have hated to get that far. And
Speaker 3: then you you know, you just say, oh, you haven't passed.
Speaker 3: So it was a surreal moment. It was hard to
Speaker 3: actually comprehend that, you know, you'd said we'd all passed,
Speaker 3: and to be alongside Million and Darius was just amazing
Speaker 3: a moment. And I think because it was a TV
Speaker 3: show like it's but it was more than that.
Speaker 4: It was more than a TV show.
Speaker 3: It was an experience of my life that showed how
Speaker 3: strong I was, and it was a bit of a
Speaker 3: I don't know, it was like a relief after all
Speaker 3: the horrible things that had happened in the year prior,
Speaker 3: and the horrible times that my family had had and
Speaker 3: the hard days, and it was like I did it,
Speaker 3: like I Actually it was kind of like the It
Speaker 3: was like the moment I felt like I got through.
Speaker 4: I got through more than what the TV show was.
Speaker 3: I got through twelve months of hell and I did it,
Speaker 3: and you know, I survived and yeah, it was. It
Speaker 3: was more than what just passing a TV show? What's
Speaker 3: it been meant? More?
Speaker 2: You feel like you can tackle anything after, don't you?
Speaker 2: You know, your self belief, your self confidence? How well
Speaker 2: has that served you? Because when I look at most
Speaker 2: of my recruits that succeed and I look at their careers,
Speaker 2: I do follow you very closely, whether you like it
Speaker 2: or not, I've always got an eye you seem to
Speaker 2: just put you know, just go. And I'm not saying
Speaker 2: that you'll succeed at everything that you do, but you
Speaker 2: don't seem unphased with life. You feel like yet you
Speaker 2: can tackle anything. How important was that course for your
Speaker 2: self confidence and self belief?
Speaker 4: It was huge?
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 3: I think you know when I walked into that room
Speaker 3: the fourteen days beforehand and you know, being really intimidated
Speaker 3: and quite you know, that real imposter syndrome, like I
Speaker 3: absolutely you know, I shouldn't be here. I don't deserve
Speaker 3: to be here. I'm not a famous person, I'm not
Speaker 3: an athlete all that sort of stuff. I'm not the
Speaker 3: strongest person here. And then to be there standing at
Speaker 3: the end, and it does huge things for you know,
Speaker 3: self confidence and just not having belief in yourself and
Speaker 3: having the confidence to go, you know, even though this
Speaker 3: is this is scary or this is a huge fear
Speaker 3: for me, it's like you've just got a charge forward
Speaker 3: and you work out, you work out the rest, you know,
Speaker 3: and it's it was massive and I think for me
Speaker 3: because I've had because of what had happened in the
Speaker 3: year before, it was it was a real like this
Speaker 3: is the start of the next chapter for me, Like
Speaker 3: it'd been a really hot, hard year, I'd lost my job,
Speaker 3: there was lots of uncertainty with what was happening with myself,
Speaker 3: and it was almost like, yeah, this is the turning
Speaker 3: point for me for my career, for what I do
Speaker 3: with my life, for how I see things, you know,
Speaker 3: making sure that I make the most of every opportunity
Speaker 3: that comes before me, whether that be just in my
Speaker 3: personal life, saying yes, doing things that I want to
Speaker 3: do for myself. And it was a huge shift in
Speaker 3: my mindset into like, right, you know, we only have
Speaker 3: this one very short life that is so precious, and
Speaker 3: I've been given this opportunit unity to listen to yourself,
Speaker 3: to listen to all of the other directing staff. For
Speaker 3: the last couple of weeks, and you guys were so
Speaker 3: gracious in sharing some of the stories that you guys
Speaker 3: have had in the things that you've done in your
Speaker 3: lives and what you've experienced, and how lucky I was
Speaker 3: to be part of that and have that very unique
Speaker 3: experience that not many people in this world will get.
Speaker 3: And I need to now use this and do the
Speaker 3: things I want to do in my life.
Speaker 2: Arianna, if you're the it pits me off Seese every opportunity,
Speaker 2: then you know you've certainly shared that message. There final
Speaker 2: question for you since then, you know, since your fractured
Speaker 2: ribs and your broken finger, and now that you've fully recovered,
Speaker 2: you've since had a beautiful baby boy. Now easier future
Speaker 2: sas recruit.
Speaker 3: Oh look, he has unbelievable upper body strength.
Speaker 4: He can hang off a bar better than I can.
Speaker 4: So you just never never know. But maybe they can do.
Speaker 3: There's been a few babies since our seasons, so maybe
Speaker 3: they can be an sas kids and all the babies
Speaker 3: and all the kids can come together. But yeah, life
Speaker 3: has changed a lot. I've had a baby. He's nineteen
Speaker 3: months old. Now, he's just the best thing ever. You know,
Speaker 3: He's changed my life for so many different reasons, and
Speaker 3: he's just brought so much love and joy to me
Speaker 3: and my family and my mum in particular. So he
Speaker 3: has been the absolute you know, just shining light for
Speaker 3: our family. And yeah, lots lots of different things have happened,
Speaker 3: but I feel like now, yeah, we're just in a
Speaker 3: good spot. You know, life is challenging. Life is never
Speaker 3: never easy. It's never still even this year, I've learned that,
Speaker 3: you know, things.
Speaker 4: Can very easily turn around.
Speaker 3: But it's just a case of you know, making the most,
Speaker 3: as you said, of those opportunities and living, you know,
Speaker 3: living living life, like not just not just cruising and
Speaker 3: coasting through, like actually get out there and live and
Speaker 3: love hard. And you know, because as I've experienced, you
Speaker 3: just absolutely never know what's going to happen.
Speaker 2: I love that if you're being challenged, then guess what
Speaker 2: you're living because thinking you're growing and you're becoming a
Speaker 2: better version of who you are. Rihanna, I've loved having
Speaker 2: you on, I love seeing you, and I'm gonna nab
Speaker 2: that little one up of yours and he's gonna be
Speaker 2: a future sas Australia recruits. But I wish you all
Speaker 2: the best for the future. I'll been seeing you real soon.
Speaker 2: Thank you ever so much for coming on Headgame. Thank
Speaker 2: you to find out more about Rihanna head to ranacorean
Speaker 2: dot com. Thanks for joining me on this episode of Headgame.
Speaker 2: If you love listening to this podcast, please share it
Speaker 2: with a friend or you can leave me a review
Speaker 2: on your favorite listening platform. I'm Att Middleton. See you
Speaker 2: in the next episode.