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Speaker 1: Peter Beans, Welcome to the podcast.

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Speaker 2: Thanks Paul. Great to be with you, mate.

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Speaker 3: I mean, before we get into your story, which is

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Speaker 3: a freaking amazing story, before we get into the meaty

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Speaker 3: part of it, you spent quite a long time in

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Speaker 3: the police force in Australia.

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Speaker 1: Just just just talk us through.

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Speaker 3: How were you when you joined? Why did you join?

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Speaker 3: How many years did you sir?

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Speaker 4: As well, Yeah, so joined at the age of nineteen,

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Speaker 4: and that was a minimum age. And you know, you

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Speaker 4: might think it was something that I'd always wanted to

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Speaker 4: do given that basis, but that's not the case. I

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Speaker 4: actually went to UNI after school and very quickly dropped

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Speaker 4: out because I went there without purpose or reason, and

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Speaker 4: then join the cops. And the funny thing is like

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Speaker 4: i'd end up reach turning to university to do a

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Speaker 4: science degree and a law degree and graduated from both

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Speaker 4: of those. But joined the cops when I was nineteen

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Speaker 4: and worked in uniform in Western Sydney four for about

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Speaker 4: four years, and then I moved into the forensic area

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Speaker 4: as a crime scene investigator, so I was attending scenes

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Speaker 4: of major crime and homicides and suspicious deaths and things

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Speaker 4: like that, and I did that for you know, I

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Speaker 4: ended up leaving two thousand and nine, and I guess

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Speaker 4: where it got interesting, Paul was after the Bali bombings in.

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Speaker 2: Two thousand and two.

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Speaker 4: I'd work in Bali with the identification of those who died,

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Speaker 4: and then I got called in the aftermath of the

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Speaker 4: tsunami and went to Thailand and that was really defining.

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Speaker 4: Like I'd spend most of two thousand and five leading

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Speaker 4: the Australian team and the international operations to identify the

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Speaker 4: five and a half thousand bodies we recovered. And then

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Speaker 4: at the end of two thousand and five, because I

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Speaker 4: spent most of my time in Thailand, then I was

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Speaker 4: invited to work for Interpol in Lyon in France, and

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Speaker 4: I was working on a highly classified counter terrorism project

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Speaker 4: around what we call CBRN, which is chemical, biological, radiological

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Speaker 4: nuclear threats. So for twelve months I was researching and

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Speaker 4: writing on what were the threats and trends on a

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Speaker 4: global scale around counter terrorism. And then while I was

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Speaker 4: in the UN. While I was in Interopol, I then

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Speaker 4: got invited to work for the UN through Southeast Asia

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Speaker 4: on capacity building and around counter terrorism and leadership. And

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Speaker 4: then at the end of that I was only supposed

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Speaker 4: to be gone because I was still employed by New

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Speaker 4: South Wales Police. I was only supposed to be gone

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Speaker 4: for twelve months, but I ended up being gone for

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Speaker 4: two and a half years. And then they contacted me

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Speaker 4: and said, you know, we've been paying you for two

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Speaker 4: and a half years, we haven't seen you.

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Speaker 2: It's time to come back.

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Speaker 4: And then when I went back, I asked for twelve

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Speaker 4: months leave without pay, and they refused, and so I resigned.

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Speaker 2: And so I left all of that. So I ended up.

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Speaker 4: Doing twenty three years and I left that in two

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Speaker 4: thousand and nine.

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Speaker 3: Right, So the forensic stuff, So look, I'm ex military

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Speaker 3: and I know that. You know there are high pressure

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Speaker 3: environments military, police, force, first responders, all of those things,

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Speaker 3: and particularly then being in forensics, you see a lot

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Speaker 3: of shit.

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Speaker 1: There's obviously a lot.

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Speaker 3: Of burnout in your professions, a lot of burnout in

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Speaker 3: the military and first responders. How did you manage that

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Speaker 3: process of seeing like horrible stuff over and over because

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Speaker 3: the human brilland's not designed for that ship, right.

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Speaker 4: No, Like there's you know, people have said at different times,

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Speaker 4: I can't imagine what you saw, and I say, that's

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Speaker 4: a good thing you don't need to and you know,

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Speaker 4: the changes that bodies go through through decomposition and so forth, it's,

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Speaker 4: you know, it's pretty horrible. And you know, when I

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Speaker 4: arrived into Thailand, like I was, I was flying into

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Speaker 4: the site in a HELLI and as we came into land,

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Speaker 4: the first sense of apart from the visual destruction that

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Speaker 4: I saw flying up the coastline, was as we came

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Speaker 4: into land, I could smell outh.

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Speaker 1: I was going to say, the smell would just be.

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Speaker 4: Like I walked in through the gates of a temple

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Speaker 4: and there was three and a half thousand decomposing bodies

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Speaker 4: on the ground, you know, and those those type of things.

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Speaker 4: They were unprecedented in scale. And you know, the body

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Speaker 4: he goes through decomposition accelerates if it's been in water

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Speaker 4: and if it's in heat. These bodies came from the

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Speaker 4: water and were laying on the ground in the heat

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Speaker 4: of the temple in temperatures that were, you know, pushing

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Speaker 4: forty degrees and so decomposition was quite rapid, and you know,

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Speaker 4: and just how the body breaks down, and then when

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Speaker 4: you have that many it's it's you know, it's something

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Speaker 4: that has to say that people don't need to imagine

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Speaker 4: and the descriptions enough, you know. But I think for me, Paul,

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Speaker 4: to answer the question, how did I get through and

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Speaker 4: how did I work through that career because basically, you know,

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Speaker 4: on a weekly basis, if I wasn't exposed to death

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Speaker 4: in some level, it was an unusual week, you know

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Speaker 4: that be that a suicide, be it a homicide, a

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Speaker 4: fatal car accent or something. That's where my work was,

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Speaker 4: you know, and and work offered you know, support programs,

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Speaker 4: things like that. A lot of it, though I would suggest,

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Speaker 4: was a way to mitigate the exposure for the organization.

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Speaker 4: And you know, and we were in a high risk area,

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Speaker 4: the forensic area. There were four areas within the police

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Speaker 4: that were considered high risk for PTSD and our area

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Speaker 4: is one of them. I think, how did I move

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Speaker 4: through successfully? And you know, I've been asked that question

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Speaker 4: a lot, And if I had the answer, you know,

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Speaker 4: if we could say this is what you need to

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Speaker 4: do to avoid it, you know, you'd solve it. But

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Speaker 4: you know, it's different for everyone, and I think I

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Speaker 4: think the thing for me was that my role continued

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Speaker 4: to change. You know, I spent probably like nineteen years

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Speaker 4: in the forensic area, and I continued to change and

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Speaker 4: that was through through promotion and opportunities that came my way.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 4: When I worked had ten years in Tamworth in regional

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Speaker 4: New South Wales and where you'd respond to make of

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Speaker 4: crime and homicides and you could travel three hundred kilometers

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Speaker 4: one way to get to a job. You could spend

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Speaker 4: several hours at the job, drive three hours home and

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Speaker 4: you sit down and have dinner with the kids and

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Speaker 4: then get called out at night to drive three hundred

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Speaker 4: kilometers in the opposite direction, you know. And we were

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Speaker 4: on call for seven seven days out of ten, and

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Speaker 4: then you'd have four days off and then you come

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Speaker 4: back straight onto call. And you know, I think that

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Speaker 4: that's the thing that really wears people down is that

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Speaker 4: they look forward into their career and say, you know,

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Speaker 4: I might be forty years old and unless I relocate

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Speaker 4: or from where I live, particularly you know country blokes

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Speaker 4: or country staff, unless they decide to relocate to the

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Speaker 4: city or leave their area of specialty and go back

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Speaker 4: to uniform, they're on call for another ten fifteen years,

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Speaker 4: you know.

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Speaker 1: And see them the sea is just the grind, right.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's just going where's the change come from? And

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Speaker 4: I think that was where, you know, for my role,

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Speaker 4: like I worked in Sydney in the Forrensic area, then

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Speaker 4: I went to Tamworth and then I got promoted to

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Speaker 4: the boss of the Tamworth section. Then I came back

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Speaker 4: to Sydney, and then I was these state operations coordinator,

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Speaker 4: and then I had all these international deployments, and so

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Speaker 4: I think it was the continual.

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Speaker 2: Change for me.

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Speaker 4: That's the only thing I can think of, you know.

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Speaker 4: And of course it doesn't happen to everyone, like the PTSD,

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Speaker 4: but for some people, you know, they can be exposed

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Speaker 4: to it for three years and go off. Some can

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Speaker 4: do it for twenty five years and then go off.

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Speaker 4: There's no set ingredient.

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Speaker 2: Yeaheah.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely.

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Speaker 3: And did you have a strategy of compartmentalizing stuff, you know,

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Speaker 3: like like going to a homicide or seeing all this

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Speaker 3: shit and then all of a sudden, I've got to

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Speaker 3: walk into the host, sit down and be your dad

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Speaker 3: to young kids. Did you have any sort of strategy

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Speaker 3: to be able to switch rules or whatever.

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Speaker 4: Not really, mate, I don't think there was a strategy

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Speaker 4: as such. I think it was more just you know,

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Speaker 4: like whether I was returning at two o'clock in the

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Speaker 4: morning after being called out and you come home, have

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Speaker 4: a shower and jump in the bed, or whether it

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Speaker 4: was just returning after a normal day at work, and

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Speaker 4: you know, you walk through the door and like, I

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Speaker 4: didn't necessarily speak to my wife in the detail of

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Speaker 4: what I've done because it's just not for any reason

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Speaker 4: other than that was just my job.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 4: It's like you talk about those type of things when

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Speaker 4: it's new, but for me, it's you know, it was

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Speaker 4: more about where are you going, how does it impact

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Speaker 4: upon the family, And you know, I think it was

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Speaker 4: like arriving at a homicide scene. You were always filled with,

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Speaker 4: you know, a lot of emotions, and it was around

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Speaker 4: that's what you train for. You were there to you know,

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Speaker 4: you turn on as you as you drive to the job,

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Speaker 4: you arrive, you're ready and because you only get one

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Speaker 4: go at entering a crime scene for the first time,

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Speaker 4: you know, and so you were thinking about what you

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Speaker 4: were there to do, as opposed to you know, the

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Speaker 4: loss or the destruction or the death or you know,

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Speaker 4: the cruelty. And you know, I think I talked about it,

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Speaker 4: you know, carrying you know, in Thailand. We had the

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Speaker 4: bodies that were frozen and shipping containers in body bags,

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Speaker 4: and you know, we would walk in and you never

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Speaker 4: knew what was inside the body bag, whether it was

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Speaker 4: an adult or a child, you know, or what nationality.

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Speaker 4: But when we lifted the kids off the shelf, instead

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Speaker 4: of putting them on trolleys, we'd carry them in our

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Speaker 4: arms and you take them up to where you had

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Speaker 4: to do the post mortem and open the bag and

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Speaker 4: look at the innocence in their faces, you know, and

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Speaker 4: you move their hair out of their eyes, and you go,

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Speaker 4: I don't want to do this anymore. And you do

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Speaker 4: that a couple of times a day, and you get

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Speaker 4: me out of here. But of course we had to stay,

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Speaker 4: and you know, we stayed. And the reason was because

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Speaker 4: you knew what you were giving the family who had

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Speaker 4: lost their loved one. You were giving them an answer,

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Speaker 4: you know, you were I talk about the most difficult

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Speaker 4: times I faced in Thailand was dealing with the relatives

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Speaker 4: of those who lost someone. But the most rewarding times

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Speaker 4: in Thailand were dealing with the families of those who

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Speaker 4: lost someone. You know, it was a juxta position where

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Speaker 4: if you didn't see the families. It could be too

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Speaker 4: easy to not recognize that everybody you know that you

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Speaker 4: identifying was someone's loved one.

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Speaker 2: But you can't.

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Speaker 4: You can't immerse yourself into the story of everybody that's

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Speaker 4: before you because you know that you can't operate that way.

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Speaker 4: So it's a balance.

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Speaker 3: It's a balance, and it's a very fine balance between

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Speaker 3: you know, doing the job and doing it effectively and

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Speaker 3: thinking about why you're doing it and unbecoming desensitised to

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Speaker 3: what you're seeing, which is what can happen to a

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Speaker 3: lot of people, that desensitization.

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Speaker 4: And I don't know, mate, like that's not my area

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Speaker 4: of expertise by any stretch of the imagination. But I

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Speaker 4: reckon all your all you're doing there is delaying they

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Speaker 4: impact of that because I reckon it comes back at

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Speaker 4: some point. That kind of stuff has to be dealt with.

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Speaker 4: And you know, and I think when we look at

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Speaker 4: generations gone past, they dealt with it by getting on

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Speaker 4: the piss, you know, and just drinking and not talking

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Speaker 4: about it led to problems at home, domestic violence and

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Speaker 4: alcohol abuse and and you know, people never processing it.

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Speaker 4: And again it's the balance of living in it or

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Speaker 4: avoiding it, but it's got to be dealt with at

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Speaker 4: some point.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. No, let's pivot night and talk about your book

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Speaker 3: and the amusing charity arms across the water. Was there

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Speaker 3: a particular moment that inspired you to start that.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I went up to It was on one of

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Speaker 4: my last apployments into Thailand. I went up to a

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Speaker 4: temple where there was a group of kids, Thai kids

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Speaker 4: who were living who had all lost their families, lost

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Speaker 4: their home, and we're living in this big tent. And

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Speaker 4: I realized that I couldn't change what had happened, but

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Speaker 4: it felt within my capacity to do something around what

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Speaker 4: happened next. So I couldn't change the fact they lost

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Speaker 4: their parents, but it felt like I could do something

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Speaker 4: around that how they spent each night. So I set

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Speaker 4: up the charity and with a view of just building

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Speaker 4: a home. And you know, that was the first first

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Speaker 4: I guess exposure and honestly I thought, you know, build

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Speaker 4: the home and the problem solved, and went over for

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Speaker 4: the opening of the home, and twelve months later and

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Speaker 4: realized the journey had just started. You know, it wasn't

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Speaker 4: something that was finished, It was only just beginning.

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Speaker 3: And when did you get the crazy idea to run

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Speaker 3: the equivalent of thirty three marathons in twenty six days.

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Speaker 3: Was there a moment where it kind of came to

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Speaker 3: you and you thought, right, this is what I'm going

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Speaker 3: to do? Or did it just sort of evolve by bit?

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Speaker 4: Yeah? No, It's like since two thousand and nine, I've

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Speaker 4: been leading charity bike rides in Thailand, so probably half

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Speaker 4: a dozen times a year I take people from Australia

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Speaker 4: from groups to size of fifteen up to seventy, and

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Speaker 4: we go and ride somewhere between five hundred and sixteen

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Speaker 4: hundred kilometers over that respective number of days. And so

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Speaker 4: you know, I've done forty three of these charity bike

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Speaker 4: rides in Thailand. In a few weeks, I'll be back

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Speaker 4: with the next one and love them.

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Speaker 2: Right.

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Speaker 4: But as the twenty year anniversary of the tsunami came close, I,

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Speaker 4: you know, I said to my wife I need to

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Speaker 4: do or we need to do something significant to mark

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Speaker 4: the milestone, and riding a bike might have been the

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Speaker 4: obvious thing, but I've done so much of it I went,

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Speaker 4: you know, that's not really hard. You know, I can

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Speaker 4: spend you know, hours on a bike. All I need

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Speaker 4: is time, and I'll cover distance, you know. And I thought,

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Speaker 4: that's not going to really challenge, it's not going to

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Speaker 4: be hugely satisfying and not really going to bring the

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Speaker 4: type of awareness or fundraising. And I thought, you know,

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Speaker 4: and I came up with this idea to run from

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Speaker 4: a home that we support in the northeast of Thailand

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Speaker 4: to the origins of our journey, which is the south

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Speaker 4: where the tsunami project is, you know. And I thought,

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Speaker 4: maybe if I run that distance and I wasn't a runner,

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Speaker 4: so the you know, the chance of success ida, Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 4: I think that's what. You know, the fact that it was,

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Speaker 4: you know, finishing was so uncertain is where part of

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Speaker 4: the joy and part of the challenge and the brilliance

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Speaker 4: in it was. And so it was two years out

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Speaker 4: I made that came up with the idea, but it

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Speaker 4: took me a month before I shared it with my

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Speaker 4: wife because I thought, I don't want to put this

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Speaker 4: out there and then not do it.

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Speaker 1: You know, it's too important social evidence when you put

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Speaker 1: it out there. Yeah, yeah, and then you go to

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Speaker 1: follow through.

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Speaker 4: I thought about it for a month and then I

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Speaker 4: walked out this morning and I said to her, I said, CT.

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Speaker 4: I said, I think I want to do this from

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Speaker 4: home hug in the northeast down to Batham nam Chai,

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Speaker 4: and I'd had a look on Google and you know,

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Speaker 4: if you drive it, it's about thirteen hundred k's And

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Speaker 4: I said, this is what I want to do. And

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Speaker 4: her response, you know, Paul, whatever she said there and

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Speaker 4: then was going to set this up either for success

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Speaker 4: or it was never going to be see the light

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Speaker 4: of day, you know.

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Speaker 2: And basically she said, well, I believe in you, and

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Speaker 2: that's all we need.

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Speaker 4: All we need is someone who says I believe in

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Speaker 4: you to hold you and share the celebration, but to

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Speaker 4: be there when it's really difficult and when success is

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Speaker 4: not assured. And so, you know, for twelve months I

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Speaker 4: started planning and then made it public twelve months out

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Speaker 4: and said this is what I'm going to do, and

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Speaker 4: train for about fifteen months and went over there and

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Speaker 4: did some simulation runs and then hit the ground on

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Speaker 4: the first of December last year.

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Speaker 1: And why in your mind did it have to be

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Speaker 1: something really hard?

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Speaker 5: Was it all about raising awareness or was there was

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Speaker 5: there something else in there about this can't be about

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Speaker 5: grade is going to be something ludicrously hard.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you know, there was three aspects to the run,

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Speaker 4: raise awareness, raise funds, and do the run. And those

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Speaker 4: three elements of the run. I don't know if I

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Speaker 4: said right, but I meant run the three elements of

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Speaker 4: the run, and the most important was the run itself.

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Speaker 4: You know, we attached a million dollar fundraising total. We

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Speaker 4: raised six hundred and seventy thousand. It was as spectacular

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Speaker 4: failure as a mate tells me when it comes to fundraising.

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Speaker 4: I don't lose sleep about not getting there. And the awareness.

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Speaker 4: You know, we wanted to raise the profile of the charity,

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Speaker 4: but you know, it needed to be something for me

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Speaker 4: that was something I'd look back on and think that

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Speaker 4: was worthy of a twenty year commitment. I wanted to

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Speaker 4: demonstrate to the kids in the homes that we support

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Speaker 4: of my commitment. I knew that doing something incredibly hard

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Speaker 4: without certainty of success would be growth for me. And

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Speaker 4: you know, at my age, it can be easy to

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Speaker 4: live an easy life. But growth comes in being uncomfortable,

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Speaker 4: you know.

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Speaker 1: And that's your singing my song.

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Speaker 2: That's where we grow, isn't that, mate? You know, it's

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Speaker 2: doing hard things that's where we build. Resilience.

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Speaker 4: We get stronger physically, mentally, spiritually, and you know, the

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Speaker 4: right the run every day, running sixty kilometers in temperatures

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Speaker 4: of you know that we're hitting forty degrees with the

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Speaker 4: humidity at a level that was just incredible, you know,

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Speaker 4: as an insight, I was drinking between fifteen and twenty.

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Speaker 2: Liters of day.

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Speaker 4: Jesus, fifteen to twenty liters a day, I was drinking,

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Speaker 4: and then I was eating on top of that, but

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Speaker 4: I was losing. I'd weigh myself at four thirty in

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Speaker 4: the morning when I woke up, and then i'd weigh

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Speaker 4: myself when I finished the run each day before I

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Speaker 4: jumped in the ice bath, and I would lose between

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Speaker 4: two and a half and three kilos a day, even

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Speaker 4: though I was taking on that much fluid, like overnight,

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Speaker 4: I'd put back on most of that way, But it

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Speaker 4: was just an example of how much fluid I was

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Speaker 4: leaving on the road, you know. And I came in

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Speaker 4: empty every day, you know, like and that's the best

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Speaker 4: word I can describe it. But it was, you know,

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Speaker 4: the hardest thing I've ever done, you know, waking up

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Speaker 4: the next day and doing it again. For twenty five

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Speaker 4: consecutive days, but the best thing I've ever done in

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Speaker 4: my life.

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Speaker 3: So I interviewed a guy on my podcast called Stan

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Speaker 3: Beacham who's a sports psychologist, and we were talking about.

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Speaker 1: Doing hard stuff right.

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Speaker 3: And he said, now, I apologies my listeners because they've

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Speaker 3: heard this a few times, because it's one of the

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Speaker 3: best things anybody's ever said in my podcast. He said,

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Speaker 3: in order to lead your best life, you need to

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Speaker 3: take on as much challenge and responsibility as you can tolerate.

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Speaker 3: But he said, every nine and then you need to

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Speaker 3: walk right to the edge of yourself and stir into

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Speaker 3: the abyss, and you need to work out what the

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Speaker 3: abyss tells you, and you walk back and you take.

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Speaker 1: It on board.

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Speaker 3: And then every nine and then you walk back to

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Speaker 3: the edge and you find that over time you have

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Speaker 3: to walk further to reach the edge right. And I

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Speaker 3: can just see the smile on you and you like

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Speaker 3: when I and even when I say that, they get goosebumps. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: how many times do you reckon? You stirred into the

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Speaker 3: abyss on that run?

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Speaker 2: Twenty six times every day?

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Speaker 4: You know? The hardest thing we were saying, we were

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Speaker 4: chatting before we hit record that you know, the lead

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Speaker 4: up to the run was, you know, I almost lost

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Speaker 4: my life because of the wrong prescription of medication. And

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Speaker 4: I went to Thailand where I hadn't been able to

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Speaker 4: train for a month. I hadn't been able to run

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Speaker 4: for a month. And you know, my coach had said

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Speaker 4: to me, the highest failure rate in these multi day

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Speaker 4: events is within the first three days.

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Speaker 2: Day two.

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Speaker 4: Day two on the run was the longest and the

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Speaker 4: hardest from just getting it done day Like, I started

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Speaker 4: in the dark and I finished in the dark, and

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Speaker 4: it's only sixty k so that shouldn't be happening, right,

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Speaker 4: And it was just the you know, the injuries or

401
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Speaker 4: the chafing, the blisters then that are carried from the

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Speaker 4: first day into the second day made it so difficult

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Speaker 4: because I'd lost so much condition, you know, and it

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Speaker 4: took me a good week to get it back. But

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Speaker 4: then day fourteen was and this is where one of

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Speaker 4: the things we have to respond to the conditions we

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Speaker 4: find ourselves in, not the ones we've hoped for. Right,

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Speaker 4: So day fourteen I start running.

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Speaker 2: That's a great.

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Speaker 1: Sorry that that is a great preamble for life. Can

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Speaker 1: you just say that again?

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Speaker 4: We have to respond to the conditions that we find

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Speaker 4: ourselves in, not the ones that we hope for. So

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Speaker 4: Day fourteen, Day fourteen, I'm running and it and you

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Speaker 4: know it. I could tell this story for hours, right.

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Speaker 4: But the night before Day thirteen was my birthday, and

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Speaker 4: we're in a town called hua Hin, which is a

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Speaker 4: major resort town on the way down.

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Speaker 2: I was probably well.

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Speaker 4: I was thirteen days into the run, exactly halfway from

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Speaker 4: a calendar day. I was a bit further in kilometers.

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Speaker 4: I went to a fundraising dinner that night that had

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Speaker 4: been held for us at a hotel, and my whole

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Speaker 4: recovery process went out the window. Didn't have my normal recovery,

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Speaker 4: didn't get in the ice BA, didn't have the massage,

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Speaker 4: didn't have the normal tech boots, nothing, because I had

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Speaker 4: to rush off to this dinner, came back quite light

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Speaker 4: late at night, woke up the next day and everything

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Speaker 4: had gone tits up. And then I was running on

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Speaker 4: this morning and I got shin splints in my left leg.

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Speaker 4: Now now you know the pain because you've had them.

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Speaker 4: And I see this when I tell this story at conferences,

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Speaker 4: there's people who sit in the audience and you can

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Speaker 4: see them. You know their face, you know, turns into

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Speaker 4: pain and there's people sitting there going I've got no

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Speaker 4: idea what you're talking about. And I describe it as

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Speaker 4: like having a screwdriver jam into the bone in your leg,

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Speaker 4: and it's not something that builds up. They're not there,

439
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Speaker 4: and then they're there. And I was running and it

440
00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:12,440
Speaker 4: just came to me. It just hit me, and you know,

441
00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:16,080
Speaker 4: I got into this pretty distressed state and the pain

442
00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:19,879
Speaker 4: was just really intense, and I was running and I'm crying,

443
00:25:20,040 --> 00:25:22,840
Speaker 4: I'm starving, I've got snot running out of my nose

444
00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:28,600
Speaker 4: and got myself into this real condition and I ended

445
00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:31,879
Speaker 4: up getting to lunch and it was all up in

446
00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:34,480
Speaker 4: the air. Like even at that point though, mate, I

447
00:25:34,680 --> 00:25:37,840
Speaker 4: never thought that the run was off. I never thought

448
00:25:38,280 --> 00:25:42,280
Speaker 4: I never questioned whether I'd finish. It was just I

449
00:25:42,359 --> 00:25:44,800
Speaker 4: had to deal with something that hadn't been planned for,

450
00:25:45,280 --> 00:25:48,200
Speaker 4: you know. And I got up from lunch and I

451
00:25:48,280 --> 00:25:51,240
Speaker 4: had eighteen kilometers to go to the end of the day.

452
00:25:51,359 --> 00:25:52,960
Speaker 2: And normally the.

453
00:25:53,040 --> 00:25:56,159
Speaker 4: Model I had was I'd run five k's and then

454
00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:58,879
Speaker 4: I'd meet the support vehicle and I could take on

455
00:25:59,119 --> 00:26:03,680
Speaker 4: fluid salt tablets, eat and sun cream and change close

456
00:26:03,760 --> 00:26:06,639
Speaker 4: to every five k's I was taking on fluid by

457
00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:10,720
Speaker 4: meeting the support vehicle. But the pain from this shin

458
00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:14,320
Speaker 4: splint that turned into a stress fracture was so intense

459
00:26:14,800 --> 00:26:18,960
Speaker 4: that I was shit scared that if I stopped start running,

460
00:26:19,320 --> 00:26:23,240
Speaker 4: I wouldn't start. So I left that lunch stop and

461
00:26:23,359 --> 00:26:27,120
Speaker 4: I had a soft flask, a half lead of flask

462
00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:31,080
Speaker 4: in my hand. And there was a Buddhist monk who

463
00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:35,320
Speaker 4: runs the home up in the north where I started.

464
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 4: She rode thirteen hundred and fifty kilometers about seven meters

465
00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:42,800
Speaker 4: behind me. We hardly ever spoke, but she just rode

466
00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:45,679
Speaker 4: behind me. When dogs came out, she would run up

467
00:26:45,680 --> 00:26:48,000
Speaker 4: and get rid of the dogs right. But this day,

468
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:52,040
Speaker 4: as I rode, I just held up the flask and

469
00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:54,480
Speaker 4: it was like Tour de France. She'd ride up next

470
00:26:54,560 --> 00:26:57,600
Speaker 4: to me, take the hand flask and go and get

471
00:26:57,600 --> 00:27:00,959
Speaker 4: it filled up from the support vehicle and bring it back. Now,

472
00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:05,080
Speaker 4: that day, I got through the thirteen k mark and

473
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:08,080
Speaker 4: I didn't stop, and I kept running. My next schedule

474
00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:09,840
Speaker 4: stop would have been at eight k, But as I

475
00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:12,360
Speaker 4: got towards that oent, I'm not stopping, and a ran

476
00:27:12,440 --> 00:27:16,639
Speaker 4: that whole eighteen kilometers and the euphoria that I felt

477
00:27:16,760 --> 00:27:20,359
Speaker 4: running along the beach that day. That day was a

478
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:24,800
Speaker 4: defining moment of the run. And there was two things

479
00:27:24,840 --> 00:27:27,639
Speaker 4: that I learned from that day. One was that the

480
00:27:28,280 --> 00:27:33,040
Speaker 4: reward follows struggle and sacrifice. The greater the struggle, the

481
00:27:33,160 --> 00:27:37,040
Speaker 4: greater the sacrifice, the greater the reward. And the second

482
00:27:37,119 --> 00:27:40,240
Speaker 4: thing I learned was that leaders bring the weather, because

483
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:43,960
Speaker 4: how I finished each day, how I arrived to see

484
00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:47,720
Speaker 4: the team matted. If I turned up and I looked

485
00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:49,880
Speaker 4: like a beaten dog and I have my head down

486
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:53,359
Speaker 4: and was sorry for myself, then that's the team would

487
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:56,200
Speaker 4: respond like that. They didn't know how to respond if

488
00:27:56,280 --> 00:27:59,520
Speaker 4: I turned up in this really shit space, right, But

489
00:27:59,640 --> 00:28:02,959
Speaker 4: if I turned up and felt the same. But if

490
00:28:03,000 --> 00:28:05,840
Speaker 4: I turned up and celebrated and punched my fist and

491
00:28:06,280 --> 00:28:08,040
Speaker 4: you know, called out, yeah we've done it and all this,

492
00:28:08,280 --> 00:28:12,320
Speaker 4: then they celebrated and the message. The real learning was

493
00:28:12,359 --> 00:28:17,040
Speaker 4: that as leaders, how we turn up matters. And you know,

494
00:28:17,680 --> 00:28:21,240
Speaker 4: it's like staring into the abyss that day. My toes

495
00:28:21,320 --> 00:28:22,600
Speaker 4: were over the edge, mate.

496
00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:25,800
Speaker 1: Bet your fuck, I bet you were. It was like

497
00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:29,240
Speaker 1: you were dangled over the abysse, mate, But it was.

498
00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:31,960
Speaker 4: It was you know, it was such a defining moment

499
00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:35,840
Speaker 4: and the high that I had at the end of

500
00:28:35,960 --> 00:28:39,480
Speaker 4: that day, and you know it was captured on video

501
00:28:39,920 --> 00:28:44,280
Speaker 4: with the emotion in the team. Everyone was just sobbing

502
00:28:44,720 --> 00:28:47,400
Speaker 4: because of what they saw me go through that day,

503
00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:51,760
Speaker 4: and it was just, you know, it's just unbelievable.

504
00:28:52,280 --> 00:28:56,280
Speaker 1: That reminds me of gem Stocktial.

505
00:28:56,360 --> 00:28:59,680
Speaker 3: Are you familiar with gem stocktall No, who spent seven

506
00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:02,880
Speaker 3: and a half years in the Hanoi Hilton prison camp

507
00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:06,360
Speaker 3: and he was their leader. So the Vietcom tried very

508
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:09,360
Speaker 3: hard to break him. They tortured him on sixteen separate

509
00:29:09,400 --> 00:29:13,880
Speaker 3: occasions and put him in solitary confinement for four fucking years.

510
00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:14,360
Speaker 4: Right.

511
00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:17,120
Speaker 3: He was asked at the end of it, and he

512
00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:19,360
Speaker 3: inspired his fellow prisoners to survive. But he was asked

513
00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:21,520
Speaker 3: at the end of it if he ever lost faith

514
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:23,600
Speaker 3: for hope. And here's what he said. He said, I

515
00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:28,640
Speaker 3: never I never doubted that I would get out. I

516
00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:32,560
Speaker 3: never lost faith in the end of the story, And

517
00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:38,520
Speaker 3: he said, and I was determined that I would prevail

518
00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:42,000
Speaker 3: in the end and turn the experience into the defining

519
00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:46,680
Speaker 3: moment of my life, which in retrospect, I would not

520
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:52,200
Speaker 3: treat it, which is pretty frigging amazing. But that just

521
00:29:52,880 --> 00:29:56,120
Speaker 3: it connects into what you said something there about the

522
00:29:56,280 --> 00:29:58,640
Speaker 3: reward and the struggle and the suffering.

523
00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:03,400
Speaker 4: What was it that you said that reward struggle and sacrifice.

524
00:30:04,080 --> 00:30:06,440
Speaker 4: You know, I think that the size of the reward

525
00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:11,160
Speaker 4: is commensurate to the struggle and sacrifice. And this is where,

526
00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:14,960
Speaker 4: like I think we, you know, as a community, as parents,

527
00:30:15,040 --> 00:30:19,200
Speaker 4: as corporate leaders, we try to remove hard things from

528
00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:23,000
Speaker 4: people's life, you know, but how do we build resilience?

529
00:30:23,200 --> 00:30:26,120
Speaker 4: Where do we develop the muscle memory to deal with

530
00:30:26,240 --> 00:30:28,840
Speaker 4: hard shit? If we don't face it, you know, we

531
00:30:28,920 --> 00:30:32,800
Speaker 4: don't get the courage. We don't get the courage until

532
00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:33,680
Speaker 4: we've done something.

533
00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:37,000
Speaker 1: There's no courage farrier there. You've got to do it.

534
00:30:37,760 --> 00:30:41,320
Speaker 4: The only time I knew that I'd be able to

535
00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:43,920
Speaker 4: run fourteen hundred kilometers in twenty six days was when

536
00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:44,400
Speaker 4: I finished.

537
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:46,840
Speaker 2: Isn't that true?

538
00:30:48,080 --> 00:30:53,200
Speaker 4: Ye? You know you said something when you were talking about,

539
00:30:53,600 --> 00:30:56,640
Speaker 4: you know, the fella in the prison there, and it

540
00:30:56,760 --> 00:30:59,360
Speaker 4: was a learning for me because my instant response to

541
00:30:59,480 --> 00:31:03,640
Speaker 4: that store he was mine can't compare to that. But

542
00:31:03,840 --> 00:31:07,000
Speaker 4: then I hear that when I tell the story as

543
00:31:07,040 --> 00:31:09,320
Speaker 4: I've done a couple of times this week at conferences

544
00:31:09,360 --> 00:31:12,480
Speaker 4: where people go, my story doesn't compare to yours, and

545
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:17,160
Speaker 4: it's something I learned, and I actually share the story

546
00:31:17,320 --> 00:31:20,160
Speaker 4: during my presentations and I say, comparison is the thief

547
00:31:20,240 --> 00:31:25,960
Speaker 4: of joy. I like that, you know, if I stand

548
00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:29,959
Speaker 4: up and compare myself to the hardship that you've faced

549
00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:34,880
Speaker 4: in the military, you know, I take away and the

550
00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:39,320
Speaker 4: hardest thing we do is the hardest thing we'll do.

551
00:31:40,240 --> 00:31:42,480
Speaker 1: It's just about to say sorry, sorry for butting in.

552
00:31:42,960 --> 00:31:45,680
Speaker 3: I's about to say, the hardest thing we've ever figused

553
00:31:45,920 --> 00:31:47,400
Speaker 3: is the hardest thing we've ever fiarsed.

554
00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:48,720
Speaker 2: It's true, isn't it?

555
00:31:49,120 --> 00:31:52,840
Speaker 1: And that creates the barometer for what is difficult in

556
00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:53,360
Speaker 1: your life.

557
00:31:53,960 --> 00:31:55,800
Speaker 2: Absolutely. And it's the same with loss.

558
00:31:56,120 --> 00:31:59,840
Speaker 4: You know, when people are dealing with loss or hard

559
00:32:00,080 --> 00:32:02,720
Speaker 4: ship or whatever. And you know, I don't think that

560
00:32:02,960 --> 00:32:06,440
Speaker 4: there's value in saying, well, there's someone doing it harder,

561
00:32:06,520 --> 00:32:09,800
Speaker 4: or someone's lost more, or I think we can learn

562
00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:13,960
Speaker 4: from those that have gone before us. But comparison is

563
00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:17,400
Speaker 4: the thief of joy. And you know, and I suffered

564
00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:21,120
Speaker 4: from this. In the lead up to my run, my

565
00:32:21,360 --> 00:32:26,480
Speaker 4: coach Maddy Abel was coaching Ned Brockman as he ran

566
00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:31,480
Speaker 4: around Homebush Stadium in Sydney trying to break the thousand

567
00:32:31,560 --> 00:32:37,000
Speaker 4: mile record. And because of the Ned was running in

568
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:40,000
Speaker 4: September and I was due to run in December. It's

569
00:32:40,040 --> 00:32:42,560
Speaker 4: only a couple of months. And because of the proximity

570
00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:45,920
Speaker 4: that I had to the insights of Ned's run, because

571
00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:49,440
Speaker 4: of our coach, the shared coach, I was watching Ned,

572
00:32:49,720 --> 00:32:53,520
Speaker 4: and I was feeling so insecure, so inferior that mine

573
00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:56,040
Speaker 4: didn't stack up that you know that it was never

574
00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:58,120
Speaker 4: going to be harder as hard. I was never going

575
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:00,760
Speaker 4: to run, you know, as far or fast. I was

576
00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:03,600
Speaker 4: never going to raise the money. And I started to

577
00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:07,480
Speaker 4: really withdraw and then I went, you know, what the

578
00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:11,680
Speaker 4: fuck is that about? And I went, you know, like,

579
00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:14,960
Speaker 4: I'm fifty seven years old, I'm about to run fourteen

580
00:33:15,080 --> 00:33:17,360
Speaker 4: hundred chiometers. Why can't I just be happy with that?

581
00:33:17,960 --> 00:33:18,160
Speaker 1: Yeah?

582
00:33:18,520 --> 00:33:22,360
Speaker 3: And in ridiculous humidity. Now, didn't do that fucking humidity,

583
00:33:22,480 --> 00:33:22,720
Speaker 3: Let me.

584
00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:27,360
Speaker 2: Tell you, as at no point comparing, you know, but.

585
00:33:27,560 --> 00:33:28,560
Speaker 4: I know, I know.

586
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:29,400
Speaker 2: But I tell you what.

587
00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:32,160
Speaker 3: When I go to Brisbane in summer, I walked on

588
00:33:32,320 --> 00:33:34,680
Speaker 3: the street two hundred yards and I think Jesus this

589
00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:36,200
Speaker 3: is for an Irishman.

590
00:33:37,800 --> 00:33:40,320
Speaker 4: True that, yeah, But see, this is the other thing

591
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:43,240
Speaker 4: that I learned was that more in the training, that

592
00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:49,960
Speaker 4: this mindset of whatever the conditions, they're my favorite, you know,

593
00:33:50,160 --> 00:33:52,960
Speaker 4: Because I was training, I was in the I was

594
00:33:53,040 --> 00:33:56,840
Speaker 4: running in the snow in Japan. I was running in

595
00:33:56,960 --> 00:33:59,760
Speaker 4: the dead of night on our farm property in minus

596
00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:00,680
Speaker 4: four degrees.

597
00:34:01,200 --> 00:34:03,560
Speaker 2: And then the very next day I flew to Thailand

598
00:34:03,680 --> 00:34:04,120
Speaker 2: for work.

599
00:34:04,240 --> 00:34:06,200
Speaker 4: I got off the plane on the Sunday, so I

600
00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:09,400
Speaker 4: was running up at our farm at minus four degrees

601
00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:13,280
Speaker 4: at night on the Saturday. On the Sunday, arrived into Thailand,

602
00:34:13,320 --> 00:34:16,280
Speaker 4: I had to do a twenty k run. I'm running

603
00:34:16,280 --> 00:34:18,520
Speaker 4: around the loops of the park and it was forty

604
00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:21,640
Speaker 4: degrees and close to one hundred percent humidity, So I

605
00:34:21,719 --> 00:34:25,960
Speaker 4: had a forty four degree temperature swing within twenty four hours.

606
00:34:26,360 --> 00:34:30,280
Speaker 4: But the thing was my learning in it was whatever

607
00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:34,920
Speaker 4: the conditions, they're my favorite, because if you complain about

608
00:34:35,040 --> 00:34:38,759
Speaker 4: the conditions, you're just taking yourself in a downward spiral,

609
00:34:39,040 --> 00:34:42,520
Speaker 4: you know, in the because you can't change that. All

610
00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:45,680
Speaker 4: you can do is change how you respond. And it

611
00:34:45,840 --> 00:34:48,839
Speaker 4: was really interesting. It was an unspoken thing we didn't

612
00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:52,239
Speaker 4: talk about it. But no one during the month of December,

613
00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:56,520
Speaker 4: from the crew or myself ever complained about the heat.

614
00:34:57,160 --> 00:35:00,719
Speaker 4: We never talked about it, and it wasn't something we said,

615
00:35:00,840 --> 00:35:04,160
Speaker 4: let's not talk about it, but no one talked about it.

616
00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:07,200
Speaker 4: And I think it was just an acceptance that I

617
00:35:07,400 --> 00:35:10,880
Speaker 4: chose to run in Thailand. I've been there a few times.

618
00:35:11,280 --> 00:35:13,279
Speaker 4: I knew it was going to be hot, you know,

619
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:15,840
Speaker 4: and that was just part of it. And you know,

620
00:35:15,880 --> 00:35:17,879
Speaker 4: if I woke up each day or if I came

621
00:35:17,960 --> 00:35:21,480
Speaker 4: in at lunch and complained about the heat, that didn't

622
00:35:21,560 --> 00:35:21,960
Speaker 4: serve me.

623
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:26,239
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, So I love that that you said that

624
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:29,920
Speaker 3: whatever the conditions were, were my favorite condition. And it

625
00:35:30,680 --> 00:35:34,680
Speaker 3: reminds me of the Stoic philosophers, and you're definitely a

626
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:39,080
Speaker 3: modern day Stoic. But but Seneca, you know saying, I

627
00:35:39,160 --> 00:35:42,360
Speaker 3: pity the man who's not fiercet adversity because he's not

628
00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:46,120
Speaker 3: he's not fist a worthy opponent, and nobody, not even him,

629
00:35:46,280 --> 00:35:51,560
Speaker 3: knows what he's capable of. And what really resilient people

630
00:35:51,800 --> 00:35:56,239
Speaker 3: do in challenges is they they view them as a

631
00:35:56,360 --> 00:36:00,520
Speaker 3: worthy opponent. And you will often hear like like the

632
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:04,000
Speaker 3: best of the best, whether it's a boxer or somebody

633
00:36:04,080 --> 00:36:08,000
Speaker 3: going I hope my opponent's in their best ship possible,

634
00:36:08,280 --> 00:36:10,800
Speaker 3: because that's going to bring out the best in me.

635
00:36:11,120 --> 00:36:11,239
Speaker 1: Right.

636
00:36:11,360 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the mindset shift that we need rather than oh,

637
00:36:16,920 --> 00:36:18,960
Speaker 3: this is hard and I don't want to have to

638
00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:21,279
Speaker 3: do this and I want to have a comfortable life.

639
00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:24,480
Speaker 3: Is I think, and I'm sure you're on the same

640
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:28,640
Speaker 3: bus as me, that we need to embrace all of

641
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:33,480
Speaker 3: life with the shit sandwiches as well and actually get

642
00:36:33,600 --> 00:36:35,320
Speaker 3: excited about the contest.

643
00:36:35,520 --> 00:36:38,560
Speaker 1: I think there's I think I don't know what you're thinking, is,

644
00:36:38,600 --> 00:36:40,279
Speaker 1: but I think there's levels to this.

645
00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:45,000
Speaker 3: There's one level where you go you accept that life

646
00:36:45,120 --> 00:36:46,560
Speaker 3: is going to be hard and you're going to have

647
00:36:46,760 --> 00:36:51,040
Speaker 3: to go through challenges. And then for the people who've

648
00:36:51,080 --> 00:36:53,800
Speaker 3: been through though, some of them go to another level

649
00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:58,920
Speaker 3: where they actually get excited about the challenges and they

650
00:36:59,160 --> 00:37:02,200
Speaker 3: view them as a worthy I can see you grinning

651
00:37:02,239 --> 00:37:04,160
Speaker 3: because I know that that's in you.

652
00:37:05,280 --> 00:37:10,480
Speaker 1: Do you know it was there a point in your

653
00:37:10,680 --> 00:37:15,440
Speaker 1: life where you mired that next step because you've obviously

654
00:37:15,560 --> 00:37:16,320
Speaker 1: mireed the step.

655
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:20,800
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't know, mate, certainly not on a conscious

656
00:37:20,920 --> 00:37:23,560
Speaker 4: level that I can say, here's the point that was,

657
00:37:25,480 --> 00:37:27,960
Speaker 4: you know, that brought me to where I am today.

658
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:28,759
Speaker 2: I think it was.

659
00:37:29,640 --> 00:37:32,080
Speaker 4: You know, I'm a pretty simple fellow who you know,

660
00:37:32,239 --> 00:37:35,920
Speaker 4: comes up with an idea or a thought or you know,

661
00:37:36,480 --> 00:37:40,239
Speaker 4: and then next thing, you know, I've I'm often doing

662
00:37:40,320 --> 00:37:43,360
Speaker 4: it and we're without worrying around the you know, the

663
00:37:43,600 --> 00:37:47,080
Speaker 4: focus on the results and not the excuses. And you know,

664
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:50,120
Speaker 4: if I if I thought about what we've achieved in

665
00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:54,240
Speaker 4: Thailand in twenty years, you know, with the positive impact

666
00:37:54,360 --> 00:37:56,880
Speaker 4: on the lives of the kids and what we've created.

667
00:37:56,960 --> 00:38:00,560
Speaker 4: You know, for many years, we've been the largest contributing

668
00:38:00,600 --> 00:38:04,720
Speaker 4: Australian charity to Thailand. We've raised over forty million dollars.

669
00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:08,640
Speaker 4: We've put Wow, we've put fifty six kids through university.

670
00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:11,719
Speaker 4: You know, one of them has just completed his PhD.

671
00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:14,680
Speaker 4: And and you know, we built properties all over We

672
00:38:14,760 --> 00:38:17,960
Speaker 4: stopped kids dying from HIV because of a lack of

673
00:38:18,440 --> 00:38:21,720
Speaker 4: access to medicine. And you know, if I thought about

674
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:24,520
Speaker 4: all of that is the where I had to get to.

675
00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:27,480
Speaker 4: I never would have started because I came from a

676
00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:31,720
Speaker 4: place of I had no experience, no knowledge, no foundations

677
00:38:31,760 --> 00:38:34,640
Speaker 4: in this area. But I just started and I think,

678
00:38:35,280 --> 00:38:38,720
Speaker 4: you know, the more action we take, the clearer will become.

679
00:38:39,520 --> 00:38:42,879
Speaker 4: Because clarity doesn't bring action. Action brings clarity. Oh God,

680
00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:47,440
Speaker 4: love it love, and you know, and it's and you know,

681
00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:50,960
Speaker 4: for me, the run it was I guess it was

682
00:38:51,120 --> 00:38:54,880
Speaker 4: unusual in the amount of planning that I had and

683
00:38:55,040 --> 00:38:58,320
Speaker 4: that that had to be for obviously for you know,

684
00:38:58,960 --> 00:39:02,480
Speaker 4: a good reason like a made of mine doctor Shawan Richardson,

685
00:39:02,800 --> 00:39:07,600
Speaker 4: whose works with high performance athletes and known him for

686
00:39:07,640 --> 00:39:09,920
Speaker 4: a long time and he was an Olympian himself, And

687
00:39:10,440 --> 00:39:12,560
Speaker 4: when I put this to him, he said, why do

688
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:15,480
Speaker 4: you need to follow this model of twenty six days?

689
00:39:15,640 --> 00:39:18,320
Speaker 4: You know, in fourteen hundred, Why can't you do just

690
00:39:18,440 --> 00:39:21,200
Speaker 4: a marathon a day, or why can't you extend the time?

691
00:39:21,440 --> 00:39:26,520
Speaker 4: And you know, it was it was intimidating as all

692
00:39:26,680 --> 00:39:30,759
Speaker 4: hell what I took on. But we were having lunch

693
00:39:30,840 --> 00:39:34,279
Speaker 4: on Christmas Day, which was the penultimate day of the

694
00:39:34,360 --> 00:39:38,040
Speaker 4: second last day before we finished the run, and my

695
00:39:38,160 --> 00:39:41,400
Speaker 4: father in law was there and we were enjoying the

696
00:39:41,960 --> 00:39:44,800
Speaker 4: lunch like we'd done the run in the morning. We

697
00:39:44,920 --> 00:39:47,920
Speaker 4: were down to twenty five k's because I'd front loaded

698
00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:50,600
Speaker 4: and having lunch, and he said, Pete, can I ask

699
00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:52,800
Speaker 4: you a question. He said, when did you think that

700
00:39:52,920 --> 00:39:56,759
Speaker 4: you'd get this done? And I said to him, never,

701
00:39:57,440 --> 00:40:00,680
Speaker 4: over the last twenty five days, I ever think I

702
00:40:00,840 --> 00:40:04,520
Speaker 4: wasn't going to finish, which is really really unusual for me,

703
00:40:04,719 --> 00:40:07,919
Speaker 4: because I've stood at the start line of a number

704
00:40:07,960 --> 00:40:10,840
Speaker 4: of ultra marathons and thought, you know, will I finish,

705
00:40:10,960 --> 00:40:14,240
Speaker 4: will I achieve? Will this be the DNF. I don't

706
00:40:14,360 --> 00:40:19,960
Speaker 4: have that personal confidence, but for some reason, embarking on

707
00:40:20,480 --> 00:40:23,279
Speaker 4: running sixty kilometers a day for twenty six days, I

708
00:40:23,440 --> 00:40:27,200
Speaker 4: never doubted the ability to finish. There was never a

709
00:40:27,400 --> 00:40:30,719
Speaker 4: moment during those twenty six days where I went I

710
00:40:30,880 --> 00:40:33,239
Speaker 4: want this to finish, or I want to stop. There

711
00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:35,000
Speaker 4: were times where I want I want to get to

712
00:40:35,080 --> 00:40:36,640
Speaker 4: the end of the day, or I want to get

713
00:40:36,680 --> 00:40:38,839
Speaker 4: to the vehicle, I want to get to the next

714
00:40:38,920 --> 00:40:42,160
Speaker 4: water stop. But there was never not one moment in

715
00:40:42,280 --> 00:40:45,200
Speaker 4: those twenty six days where I went, I want to

716
00:40:45,239 --> 00:40:47,960
Speaker 4: pull out. Never did I have that moment of thinking.

717
00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:49,640
Speaker 4: And I think a big part of it, Pau was

718
00:40:50,320 --> 00:40:56,319
Speaker 4: for me, I was so scared of failure, you quitting.

719
00:40:56,160 --> 00:40:58,520
Speaker 1: Because because of what was on the lane, because of

720
00:40:58,600 --> 00:40:59,080
Speaker 1: the purpose.

721
00:41:00,480 --> 00:41:02,440
Speaker 2: This was a one off event, you know, this was

722
00:41:02,640 --> 00:41:06,160
Speaker 2: I had to arrive on Boxing day, the mark twenty.

723
00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:09,040
Speaker 1: Years because yeah, gotcha, Yeah, so I couldn't.

724
00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:09,239
Speaker 2: I couldn't go.

725
00:41:09,960 --> 00:41:12,239
Speaker 4: I've had this medical episode in the lead up. We'll

726
00:41:12,280 --> 00:41:16,160
Speaker 4: just put it off to next year. I'd already raised

727
00:41:16,400 --> 00:41:21,560
Speaker 4: three hundred thousand through donors and supporters before even took

728
00:41:21,640 --> 00:41:25,239
Speaker 4: one step in Thailand. And I was just driven by

729
00:41:26,120 --> 00:41:31,000
Speaker 4: this personal fear of failure and knowing that if I quit,

730
00:41:31,120 --> 00:41:33,840
Speaker 4: it would guarantee failure that would live with me forever.

731
00:41:34,320 --> 00:41:38,439
Speaker 4: Like I went into this really dark, depressed state within

732
00:41:38,760 --> 00:41:41,759
Speaker 4: forty hours of finishing the run, and I sat there

733
00:41:41,840 --> 00:41:47,480
Speaker 4: for weeks in this dark state, and I'd succeeded, and

734
00:41:47,600 --> 00:41:50,440
Speaker 4: I went, what place would I have been in if

735
00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:53,719
Speaker 4: I had had quit, if I'd failed the run? You know,

736
00:41:54,000 --> 00:41:57,399
Speaker 4: it actually scared me to think how dark and deep

737
00:41:57,440 --> 00:41:59,200
Speaker 4: I would have gone if I wouldn't have finished.

738
00:41:59,800 --> 00:42:00,920
Speaker 2: So, you know, this.

739
00:42:02,400 --> 00:42:06,120
Speaker 4: This concept was just you know, I'm dealing with pain.

740
00:42:06,200 --> 00:42:10,040
Speaker 4: I'm running through pain. It'll stop when you know, an

741
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:12,640
Speaker 4: hour after I stopped running, the blisters won't hurt, the

742
00:42:12,719 --> 00:42:16,040
Speaker 4: chafing won't hurt, you know, my it b the stress,

743
00:42:16,320 --> 00:42:19,880
Speaker 4: the stress structure, that'll all stop hurting. Once I stop running,

744
00:42:20,440 --> 00:42:23,239
Speaker 4: and all I got to do is just manage the

745
00:42:23,280 --> 00:42:24,120
Speaker 4: pain while I run.

746
00:42:24,920 --> 00:42:27,440
Speaker 1: All I got to do. It's the all epictetius, This

747
00:42:27,680 --> 00:42:28,720
Speaker 1: too shall pass.

748
00:42:29,320 --> 00:42:30,239
Speaker 2: That's exactly right.

749
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:34,520
Speaker 4: You know the good times, they too shall pass. Ye times,

750
00:42:34,960 --> 00:42:36,040
Speaker 4: they too shall pass.

751
00:42:36,160 --> 00:42:39,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, absolutely, It's interesting that you went into it

752
00:42:39,520 --> 00:42:43,359
Speaker 3: pretty direct place. Afterwards, I've spoken to several people who

753
00:42:44,280 --> 00:42:48,960
Speaker 3: achieved like ridiculous things like you have, and then afterwards

754
00:42:49,080 --> 00:42:50,960
Speaker 3: there's that, there's that crash.

755
00:42:53,120 --> 00:42:55,680
Speaker 1: Did you do you any exploring? Did you talk to

756
00:42:55,719 --> 00:43:01,000
Speaker 1: a psychologist about that? About what causes that? From doing

757
00:43:01,160 --> 00:43:05,280
Speaker 1: something so amasing that when it finishes you just crush

758
00:43:05,840 --> 00:43:07,560
Speaker 1: any insights at all. Yeah.

759
00:43:08,760 --> 00:43:11,759
Speaker 4: I hooked up with a great sports site from the

760
00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:16,040
Speaker 4: Sunny Coast in the lead up to the run, and

761
00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:19,640
Speaker 4: the thing was, I'd been through this, and you would

762
00:43:19,719 --> 00:43:23,040
Speaker 4: know this from having done deployments. You come home and

763
00:43:24,080 --> 00:43:27,560
Speaker 4: you go, well, how is everyone just functioning as per normal?

764
00:43:28,040 --> 00:43:31,120
Speaker 4: You know, when I came home from carrying the bodies

765
00:43:31,160 --> 00:43:35,080
Speaker 4: of dead children around, you know, walking around thousands of bodies,

766
00:43:35,120 --> 00:43:37,680
Speaker 4: and then you know, you fly home the next day,

767
00:43:37,719 --> 00:43:40,840
Speaker 4: you're down at the supermarket and everyone's just living normal life,

768
00:43:40,920 --> 00:43:42,479
Speaker 4: and you know, how does this occur?

769
00:43:42,680 --> 00:43:45,040
Speaker 1: Right? Complaining about Mundie and shit?

770
00:43:45,320 --> 00:43:45,440
Speaker 5: Right?

771
00:43:45,560 --> 00:43:49,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah right. So I'd gone through that when

772
00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:52,600
Speaker 4: I'd been on deployment, so I kind of knew that

773
00:43:52,800 --> 00:43:56,720
Speaker 4: would come and it would pass. And we'd talked about

774
00:43:57,120 --> 00:44:01,400
Speaker 4: what might happen after the run, and because she deals

775
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:05,400
Speaker 4: with high performance athletes, many of whom that was their career,

776
00:44:05,880 --> 00:44:08,960
Speaker 4: where to me, this was a really small window. We

777
00:44:09,080 --> 00:44:12,320
Speaker 4: thought that, you know, I'd be I'd be okay. But

778
00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:17,120
Speaker 4: within two days of finishing the run, I had breakfast

779
00:44:17,200 --> 00:44:19,400
Speaker 4: at the hotel. I walked back to my room and

780
00:44:19,480 --> 00:44:21,960
Speaker 4: I sat on the bed and I said to myself,

781
00:44:22,000 --> 00:44:25,560
Speaker 4: I went, what the fuck was that about? And from

782
00:44:25,640 --> 00:44:29,080
Speaker 4: that moment on, I just went down and down and down.

783
00:44:29,480 --> 00:44:31,080
Speaker 4: And then my wife was the same.

784
00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:31,640
Speaker 2: Like she was up.

785
00:44:32,120 --> 00:44:35,520
Speaker 4: She was you know, you read the book and listened

786
00:44:35,520 --> 00:44:37,719
Speaker 4: to her contribution. I couldn't have done it without her

787
00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:41,080
Speaker 4: or the team, right, And she was instrumental. She ran

788
00:44:41,160 --> 00:44:45,040
Speaker 4: with me every day and we got off the plane

789
00:44:45,160 --> 00:44:47,800
Speaker 4: and I drove straight to the farm to leave the

790
00:44:47,880 --> 00:44:50,239
Speaker 4: people looking after our dogs. And she joined me a

791
00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:52,480
Speaker 4: couple of days later at the farm and we just

792
00:44:52,560 --> 00:44:56,399
Speaker 4: wandered around like zombies. You know, and I just went

793
00:44:56,440 --> 00:45:00,719
Speaker 4: into this really really dark place. I said, like I'd

794
00:45:01,600 --> 00:45:04,400
Speaker 4: achieved everything I'd set out for. Like the fact I

795
00:45:04,480 --> 00:45:07,320
Speaker 4: didn't raise a million dollars didn't bother me. You know

796
00:45:07,480 --> 00:45:10,440
Speaker 4: that the run was it couldn't have gone better. And

797
00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:12,560
Speaker 4: yet and I think, and.

798
00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:17,160
Speaker 2: To some degree, I still grieve the loss of what

799
00:45:17,320 --> 00:45:17,960
Speaker 2: we had there.

800
00:45:18,719 --> 00:45:22,680
Speaker 4: And it was just you know, something that something that

801
00:45:23,800 --> 00:45:26,399
Speaker 4: it was the best thing either us I've ever done

802
00:45:26,440 --> 00:45:30,040
Speaker 4: in our lives, you know, and we both talk about it.

803
00:45:30,239 --> 00:45:32,560
Speaker 4: Hands down, you know, it was the best thing I've

804
00:45:32,600 --> 00:45:35,560
Speaker 4: ever done in my life. And to achieve it, to

805
00:45:35,719 --> 00:45:38,279
Speaker 4: work so hard to get there, to achieve it, and

806
00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:42,520
Speaker 4: you know, you know, taking that on at my age

807
00:45:42,600 --> 00:45:46,040
Speaker 4: and and you know, and I think to come home,

808
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:49,799
Speaker 4: there was just just this emptiness of what we had

809
00:45:50,000 --> 00:45:52,960
Speaker 4: and what we shared every day. Like you know, if

810
00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:55,160
Speaker 4: you go to the finish line of an iron Man

811
00:45:55,400 --> 00:45:58,600
Speaker 4: or a marathon, you know, you see people just break

812
00:45:58,680 --> 00:46:01,520
Speaker 4: down with emotion. Why had that for twenty six days

813
00:46:01,560 --> 00:46:01,920
Speaker 4: in a row?

814
00:46:02,200 --> 00:46:05,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, Yeah, there's there's going to be something in this

815
00:46:06,320 --> 00:46:13,280
Speaker 3: post extraordinary achievement malaise. And you know there's probably something

816
00:46:13,360 --> 00:46:17,880
Speaker 3: that the malays afterwards is directly proportional to the size

817
00:46:17,880 --> 00:46:18,719
Speaker 3: of the achievement.

818
00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:21,120
Speaker 2: I reckon, I think that's your next master's program.

819
00:46:21,520 --> 00:46:24,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think, Jesus there's something in that.

820
00:46:24,239 --> 00:46:26,120
Speaker 2: I think there's absolutely there's got to.

821
00:46:26,160 --> 00:46:26,880
Speaker 1: Be something in that.

822
00:46:29,320 --> 00:46:32,920
Speaker 3: Look, we talked about purpose and how important purpose is

823
00:46:33,239 --> 00:46:37,799
Speaker 3: to particularly to get through really difficult things. I mean,

824
00:46:37,920 --> 00:46:43,080
Speaker 3: Victor Frankel talked about that, ascribing ascribing purpose to hardship,

825
00:46:43,160 --> 00:46:47,719
Speaker 3: meaning and purpose And in terms of then lessons, because

826
00:46:47,719 --> 00:46:51,080
Speaker 3: you've been a leader in the police force, and what

827
00:46:51,280 --> 00:46:55,359
Speaker 3: are some of the lessons that you have gleaned out

828
00:46:55,440 --> 00:47:03,120
Speaker 3: of this whole experience, your your entire career for leadership, Well.

829
00:47:03,040 --> 00:47:05,160
Speaker 2: That's a big question. I think there's a couple of things.

830
00:47:05,280 --> 00:47:10,960
Speaker 4: And you talk about purpose and and for leaders I

831
00:47:11,040 --> 00:47:14,360
Speaker 4: think you know, the teams that we're leading, people follow

832
00:47:15,200 --> 00:47:18,120
Speaker 4: your purpose, not your plan, and so it doesn't matter

833
00:47:18,200 --> 00:47:21,200
Speaker 4: how good your plans, people get behind you when you

834
00:47:21,360 --> 00:47:25,960
Speaker 4: have purpose. And I think you know, one of the

835
00:47:26,040 --> 00:47:30,880
Speaker 4: things that I talk about the reasons why the Australians

836
00:47:30,960 --> 00:47:34,600
Speaker 4: were so successful in the work that we did in Thailand,

837
00:47:34,719 --> 00:47:37,560
Speaker 4: like there were thirty six countries that were represented, four

838
00:47:37,680 --> 00:47:41,680
Speaker 4: hundred and fifty forensic staff yet the leaders, the Australians

839
00:47:41,719 --> 00:47:46,000
Speaker 4: held so many of the leadership positions for a significant

840
00:47:46,080 --> 00:47:50,440
Speaker 4: period of time, and you go, why was that we

841
00:47:50,520 --> 00:47:54,279
Speaker 4: didn't arrive first? We didn't have greater skill, experience or expertise,

842
00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:56,920
Speaker 4: We didn't lose more bodies to give us this right.

843
00:47:57,600 --> 00:47:59,600
Speaker 4: It was a number of things that we did. It

844
00:47:59,719 --> 00:48:04,080
Speaker 4: was with speed, sensitivity, structure, and simplicity. But if there's

845
00:48:04,160 --> 00:48:07,760
Speaker 4: one thing, and I saw it reproduced when I worked

846
00:48:07,800 --> 00:48:11,360
Speaker 4: in the Awachi Prefecture of Japan after the tsunami of

847
00:48:11,440 --> 00:48:16,160
Speaker 4: twenty eleven there, it's this concept of presence. And I think,

848
00:48:17,000 --> 00:48:21,200
Speaker 4: you know, leaders underestimate the significance of their presence when

849
00:48:21,239 --> 00:48:24,799
Speaker 4: they're leading teams because when you turn up, it says

850
00:48:24,880 --> 00:48:29,320
Speaker 4: two things. One you care and one you understand. As leaders,

851
00:48:29,440 --> 00:48:31,879
Speaker 4: we don't have to have all the answers. We don't

852
00:48:32,000 --> 00:48:35,560
Speaker 4: have to bring about change, but we need to be present.

853
00:48:35,840 --> 00:48:39,960
Speaker 4: And I think, you know, we over complicate, you know,

854
00:48:40,120 --> 00:48:43,359
Speaker 4: leadership a lot of the time. I think it's having

855
00:48:43,440 --> 00:48:47,560
Speaker 4: the courage to make difficult decisions because the wrong decision

856
00:48:47,600 --> 00:48:51,359
Speaker 4: is better than no decision. And I think being being

857
00:48:51,480 --> 00:48:55,200
Speaker 4: present and having that real clarity and you know, we've

858
00:48:55,239 --> 00:48:57,960
Speaker 4: already talked about many of the learnings that I took

859
00:48:58,080 --> 00:49:02,000
Speaker 4: from the run and you know, reinforce those to me,

860
00:49:02,160 --> 00:49:04,799
Speaker 4: and you know, equally the learning so I took from

861
00:49:05,239 --> 00:49:08,280
Speaker 4: you know, taking teams into crisis and disasters owns.

862
00:49:09,400 --> 00:49:13,600
Speaker 3: And if you were so given that all of the

863
00:49:13,680 --> 00:49:16,120
Speaker 3: stuff that you've done in your life and all the

864
00:49:16,239 --> 00:49:21,839
Speaker 3: stuff that you have achieved, what advice would you give

865
00:49:22,160 --> 00:49:25,520
Speaker 3: to your eighteen year old self or a bunch of

866
00:49:25,640 --> 00:49:28,919
Speaker 3: eighteen year olds that you were mentoring? And I see

867
00:49:28,960 --> 00:49:31,480
Speaker 3: answer both of those questions because the advice that you

868
00:49:31,600 --> 00:49:34,759
Speaker 3: give to yourself, I find when I reflect on that,

869
00:49:34,920 --> 00:49:37,320
Speaker 3: I would be harder on myself than I would be

870
00:49:37,440 --> 00:49:40,440
Speaker 3: on other people. So what advice would you give your

871
00:49:40,480 --> 00:49:42,960
Speaker 3: eighteen year old self? And what advice would you give

872
00:49:43,080 --> 00:49:48,560
Speaker 3: to eighteen year olds right now? Around just some life lessons?

873
00:49:49,640 --> 00:49:52,719
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think like the first part of the question

874
00:49:52,960 --> 00:49:56,880
Speaker 4: would be to celebrate the moment and celebrate the success

875
00:49:58,320 --> 00:50:01,360
Speaker 4: more than I ever have, you know. And it's like

876
00:50:01,440 --> 00:50:06,040
Speaker 4: I've done a number of things in my life, you know,

877
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:10,120
Speaker 4: through what we've spoken about, professional achievements and you know,

878
00:50:10,280 --> 00:50:13,680
Speaker 4: studying law part time where we had you know, three kids,

879
00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:17,880
Speaker 4: and graduating from that, getting a helicopter pilot's license because

880
00:50:17,920 --> 00:50:20,960
Speaker 4: I liked, you know, the idea of it, and you know,

881
00:50:21,160 --> 00:50:25,080
Speaker 4: running and building the biggest charity and all these things.

882
00:50:25,400 --> 00:50:29,080
Speaker 4: But you know, I never celebrate the success of any

883
00:50:29,120 --> 00:50:32,759
Speaker 4: of it. And and I think that you know that

884
00:50:34,680 --> 00:50:39,080
Speaker 4: part of that is keeps us humble. But I guess

885
00:50:39,120 --> 00:50:40,359
Speaker 4: if you describe yourself as.

886
00:50:40,400 --> 00:50:41,480
Speaker 2: Humble when you're not humble.

887
00:50:41,560 --> 00:50:46,440
Speaker 4: But you know, I think part of it keeps us grounded.

888
00:50:46,600 --> 00:50:49,400
Speaker 4: But I also think that there's a need. And this

889
00:50:49,600 --> 00:50:51,959
Speaker 4: was something that we did, and it was a last

890
00:50:52,080 --> 00:50:55,080
Speaker 4: minute inclusion for the run, and what I had made

891
00:50:55,160 --> 00:50:57,880
Speaker 4: up was this board. It was about a meter and

892
00:50:57,920 --> 00:51:00,680
Speaker 4: a half by a meter and it was a hard

893
00:51:00,760 --> 00:51:04,279
Speaker 4: plastic board, and we had the twenty six days of

894
00:51:04,400 --> 00:51:09,000
Speaker 4: the run printed like a calendar on that board, and

895
00:51:09,800 --> 00:51:13,279
Speaker 4: every day, one of the eleven of the team that

896
00:51:13,400 --> 00:51:17,400
Speaker 4: were there crossed off one of the days and we celebrated.

897
00:51:18,000 --> 00:51:20,680
Speaker 4: We celebrated, and we wrote on the the in the

898
00:51:20,800 --> 00:51:24,800
Speaker 4: box the distance would run and the cumulative distance, and

899
00:51:26,040 --> 00:51:31,399
Speaker 4: it just became such a monumental point of every day

900
00:51:32,040 --> 00:51:34,560
Speaker 4: that I would thank the team, I'd talk about what

901
00:51:34,680 --> 00:51:37,560
Speaker 4: we'd done and talked about how much I appreciated their efforts,

902
00:51:37,600 --> 00:51:40,040
Speaker 4: and they'd say, Paul, come on up and cross off

903
00:51:40,080 --> 00:51:42,879
Speaker 4: a day. Then the whole team would start this year,

904
00:51:42,960 --> 00:51:44,920
Speaker 4: and it got louder and louder and louder until they

905
00:51:44,960 --> 00:51:48,719
Speaker 4: crossed off the day. And celebrating each day was so important.

906
00:51:49,200 --> 00:51:51,960
Speaker 4: So for my eighteen month, I would so adaen year,

907
00:51:52,000 --> 00:51:55,640
Speaker 4: I'd say my self, I'd say, continue the path you're on.

908
00:51:55,800 --> 00:51:58,440
Speaker 4: You made some mistakes, but that's who you are. But

909
00:51:59,080 --> 00:52:04,320
Speaker 4: you know, find find time to celebrate, not just for

910
00:52:04,400 --> 00:52:07,960
Speaker 4: yourself but also for your team, because I know, I

911
00:52:08,080 --> 00:52:12,160
Speaker 4: have really high expectations of myself, and then that translates

912
00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:16,200
Speaker 4: or transfers across to those I work with. And sometimes

913
00:52:16,280 --> 00:52:21,040
Speaker 4: because I don't celebrate, then I don't celebrate and acknowledge

914
00:52:21,120 --> 00:52:25,920
Speaker 4: the others. And yeah, it's a portant you know that

915
00:52:26,160 --> 00:52:30,120
Speaker 4: that work ethic is both probably the good and the

916
00:52:30,239 --> 00:52:34,840
Speaker 4: negative because I expect others just to do and operate

917
00:52:35,120 --> 00:52:37,360
Speaker 4: as I do, and that's not the case, you know.

918
00:52:38,320 --> 00:52:41,759
Speaker 4: So you know, then to eighteen year olds, if I

919
00:52:41,840 --> 00:52:44,439
Speaker 4: was talking to a group of them, I just say

920
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:46,759
Speaker 4: to them to you know, to get amongst it, to

921
00:52:47,440 --> 00:52:50,120
Speaker 4: you know, to take on scary shit, to you know,

922
00:52:50,280 --> 00:52:53,879
Speaker 4: do things where there's uncertainty to you know, don't wait

923
00:52:54,040 --> 00:52:57,880
Speaker 4: for permission, and don't wait until you've got the answers.

924
00:52:58,000 --> 00:53:01,560
Speaker 4: Don't look for certainty, don't look for safe options. And

925
00:53:02,239 --> 00:53:05,560
Speaker 4: you know, and and and you know, we're if we

926
00:53:05,640 --> 00:53:10,600
Speaker 4: put our dreams out there, we're judged, and people judges

927
00:53:10,680 --> 00:53:13,960
Speaker 4: and say, you know, we're too big, we're too small,

928
00:53:14,040 --> 00:53:17,080
Speaker 4: we're too we're not fit enough, we're too big, you know,

929
00:53:17,400 --> 00:53:21,200
Speaker 4: all these judgments. But and then they define, they seek

930
00:53:21,239 --> 00:53:23,800
Speaker 4: to define what we should do. But truly we're the

931
00:53:23,920 --> 00:53:28,040
Speaker 4: ones who should find out what we're capable of. And

932
00:53:28,080 --> 00:53:31,200
Speaker 4: the only way we can do that is by trying it,

933
00:53:31,480 --> 00:53:34,320
Speaker 4: getting to the edge, as you've spoken about getting to

934
00:53:34,440 --> 00:53:38,239
Speaker 4: the abyss, looking over the edge, you know, and and

935
00:53:38,600 --> 00:53:41,160
Speaker 4: you know, as you and I both recognize that's where

936
00:53:41,239 --> 00:53:44,720
Speaker 4: growth comes from. And you know, it's such an exciting place,

937
00:53:45,960 --> 00:53:49,320
Speaker 4: you know, to think that you can't go further, and

938
00:53:49,440 --> 00:53:50,320
Speaker 4: then to go further.

939
00:53:50,880 --> 00:53:53,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, there was a meal of mine actually that I

940
00:53:53,480 --> 00:53:56,359
Speaker 3: joined the Enforces with is done. And he's as mad

941
00:53:56,440 --> 00:53:59,279
Speaker 3: as a cut snack smator, boats and all sorts of

942
00:53:59,360 --> 00:54:02,800
Speaker 3: crazy stuff. I remember said to me one dext I

943
00:54:02,880 --> 00:54:04,680
Speaker 3: think we both got in a bit of ship in

944
00:54:04,800 --> 00:54:08,000
Speaker 3: the in the navy together and he just turned and

945
00:54:08,080 --> 00:54:10,239
Speaker 3: he looked at me and he said, if you're not

946
00:54:10,480 --> 00:54:13,360
Speaker 3: right on the edge, you're taking up too much space.

947
00:54:15,719 --> 00:54:17,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, which is a cracker.

948
00:54:17,960 --> 00:54:23,160
Speaker 3: So what's for somebody who's achieved something so amazing, right

949
00:54:23,320 --> 00:54:25,839
Speaker 3: in terms of building that whole charity, all the ship

950
00:54:25,920 --> 00:54:30,919
Speaker 3: you've done in your life? What does the future look

951
00:54:31,120 --> 00:54:34,560
Speaker 3: like like? Do you sit and wonder about the future

952
00:54:34,600 --> 00:54:37,240
Speaker 3: and is there a little part of your brain that goes,

953
00:54:37,840 --> 00:54:41,440
Speaker 3: how you going to top that? Are you have you

954
00:54:41,600 --> 00:54:45,000
Speaker 3: reached the point of contentment of the path that you're on?

955
00:54:45,760 --> 00:54:46,440
Speaker 2: What do you reckon?

956
00:54:47,640 --> 00:54:48,800
Speaker 1: I reckon? I reckon.

957
00:54:48,920 --> 00:54:52,160
Speaker 3: There's there's that little voice that just pops up every

958
00:54:52,320 --> 00:54:54,960
Speaker 3: now and then it goes, come on, motherfucker, what's next? Yeah?

959
00:54:55,400 --> 00:54:56,120
Speaker 2: Well, here's the thing.

960
00:54:56,239 --> 00:55:00,480
Speaker 4: Right when I when I write the book, uh, I

961
00:55:00,560 --> 00:55:03,760
Speaker 4: can finishing the run, Lots of people say, so, what's next?

962
00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:07,279
Speaker 4: And it's a really interesting question, isn't it? Because no

963
00:55:07,360 --> 00:55:09,880
Speaker 4: one asked me that before I'd done the run, and

964
00:55:10,719 --> 00:55:12,919
Speaker 4: you know, and it's like, well, I don't know whether

965
00:55:13,000 --> 00:55:16,040
Speaker 4: it's their assessment that, Well, you can't be happy with that.

966
00:55:16,160 --> 00:55:17,080
Speaker 2: You've got to do more.

967
00:55:17,160 --> 00:55:20,200
Speaker 4: But you know, I've never been asked the question before

968
00:55:20,280 --> 00:55:22,680
Speaker 4: I did the run, as so what's next? And you

969
00:55:22,840 --> 00:55:26,000
Speaker 4: do the run and then people go, that's fantastic. So Peter,

970
00:55:26,120 --> 00:55:28,319
Speaker 4: what what's next for you? And you go, well, holy funk,

971
00:55:28,360 --> 00:55:30,120
Speaker 4: I've just done this run. Perhaps I might sit in

972
00:55:30,200 --> 00:55:32,279
Speaker 4: the glow of that for a while, but you.

973
00:55:32,360 --> 00:55:32,960
Speaker 2: Go and run it.

974
00:55:33,080 --> 00:55:34,879
Speaker 1: Now ask yourself what's next.

975
00:55:35,320 --> 00:55:39,000
Speaker 2: So I wrote the book, and I and that was

976
00:55:39,080 --> 00:55:40,000
Speaker 2: where big achievement.

977
00:55:40,360 --> 00:55:41,720
Speaker 1: Writing a book is a big achievement.

978
00:55:41,800 --> 00:55:44,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've written. This was my fourth and I really enjoyed,

979
00:55:44,960 --> 00:55:48,680
Speaker 4: really enjoyed writing it. But but you know, your question

980
00:55:48,960 --> 00:55:51,960
Speaker 4: is to is there something else? And you know, I've

981
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:54,960
Speaker 4: spoken about the importance of sharing this journey with my

982
00:55:55,040 --> 00:55:58,279
Speaker 4: wife and and we're in New Zealand only a few

983
00:55:58,320 --> 00:56:03,040
Speaker 4: weeks ago, and for my son's wedding, and we're laying

984
00:56:03,080 --> 00:56:05,879
Speaker 4: in bed at night and she was finishing the book

985
00:56:06,280 --> 00:56:08,719
Speaker 4: and she was getting towards the end of it, and

986
00:56:10,400 --> 00:56:13,600
Speaker 4: we're just about to go to sleep, and she said,

987
00:56:13,880 --> 00:56:17,320
Speaker 4: you know, I'm really sad that this is coming to

988
00:56:17,440 --> 00:56:20,400
Speaker 4: the end. She said, you know, is that the biggest

989
00:56:20,400 --> 00:56:22,680
Speaker 4: thing you think we'll ever do? And it's a bit

990
00:56:22,800 --> 00:56:25,040
Speaker 4: sad that we might not do anything as big as that,

991
00:56:25,320 --> 00:56:28,080
Speaker 4: and you know, and she said, I'm getting to the

992
00:56:28,160 --> 00:56:29,399
Speaker 4: end of the book and it feels like the whole

993
00:56:29,480 --> 00:56:30,160
Speaker 4: journey's over.

994
00:56:31,160 --> 00:56:31,799
Speaker 1: And she.

995
00:56:33,280 --> 00:56:35,520
Speaker 4: Closed her eyes, turned the light off and went to sleep.

996
00:56:35,560 --> 00:56:38,360
Speaker 4: And I'm laying there with my eyes staring at the ceiling.

997
00:56:38,440 --> 00:56:40,120
Speaker 4: Are you fuck her? I'm not going to be able

998
00:56:40,120 --> 00:56:43,239
Speaker 4: to sleep now. So I spent hours awake staring at

999
00:56:43,280 --> 00:56:45,440
Speaker 4: the ceiling, going, what does that mean? We've got to

1000
00:56:45,520 --> 00:56:46,279
Speaker 4: do something more?

1001
00:56:46,600 --> 00:56:49,880
Speaker 2: But you know, I hadn't.

1002
00:56:50,440 --> 00:56:52,520
Speaker 4: It wasn't something that I lined up and went, well,

1003
00:56:52,560 --> 00:56:54,680
Speaker 4: this is what we'll do. I have to run further

1004
00:56:54,880 --> 00:56:57,640
Speaker 4: or I've got to now do some swim or something

1005
00:56:57,840 --> 00:57:01,440
Speaker 4: like that, like I did the run becaurse of the

1006
00:57:01,520 --> 00:57:05,879
Speaker 4: twenty year anniversary, you know. And there's never through this year,

1007
00:57:05,960 --> 00:57:09,520
Speaker 4: there hasn't been a time where I've gone, I need

1008
00:57:09,600 --> 00:57:12,800
Speaker 4: to do something. But I share a bit of a

1009
00:57:12,880 --> 00:57:17,320
Speaker 4: secret just between you and me, that there's something brewing and.

1010
00:57:21,160 --> 00:57:25,240
Speaker 2: It's actually it's bigger, and.

1011
00:57:26,960 --> 00:57:30,320
Speaker 4: It's taken It's taken me twelve months. But again there's

1012
00:57:30,440 --> 00:57:31,040
Speaker 4: reason for it.

1013
00:57:31,280 --> 00:57:31,440
Speaker 1: You know.

1014
00:57:31,560 --> 00:57:35,480
Speaker 4: When I look at it, it's not bigger in days

1015
00:57:35,600 --> 00:57:39,600
Speaker 4: or kilometers or kind of giving it away, but just

1016
00:57:39,760 --> 00:57:43,720
Speaker 4: to make it bigger. It's just you know, what I'm planning,

1017
00:57:44,960 --> 00:57:48,400
Speaker 4: and I feel excited for that again. And and I think,

1018
00:57:48,560 --> 00:57:53,120
Speaker 4: you know, at my age, you can't let the old

1019
00:57:53,160 --> 00:57:57,480
Speaker 4: man in, you know, like that as soon as you stop,

1020
00:57:58,600 --> 00:58:00,480
Speaker 4: you know, as soon as I stop. And I know

1021
00:58:00,920 --> 00:58:05,240
Speaker 4: that when I started, like I was running like not

1022
00:58:05,400 --> 00:58:09,360
Speaker 4: big distances, but I was training through twenty eighteen and

1023
00:58:09,600 --> 00:58:14,720
Speaker 4: was running like four thirty kilometers four minute thirty kilometers.

1024
00:58:14,800 --> 00:58:19,400
Speaker 4: And then you know, for whatever reason, you know, I

1025
00:58:19,560 --> 00:58:21,919
Speaker 4: wasn't running much and went for a number of years

1026
00:58:21,960 --> 00:58:25,120
Speaker 4: where there was no real regular running. And then when

1027
00:58:25,440 --> 00:58:30,640
Speaker 4: I started training for the Thailand Run, I couldn't get

1028
00:58:30,720 --> 00:58:33,840
Speaker 4: back to those the speeds that I was running. And

1029
00:58:34,200 --> 00:58:37,520
Speaker 4: admittedly I was training for something different, but and it

1030
00:58:37,640 --> 00:58:41,600
Speaker 4: took me so much longer to regain the fitness. And

1031
00:58:41,720 --> 00:58:43,440
Speaker 4: that's one of the things I know that if I

1032
00:58:43,560 --> 00:58:46,320
Speaker 4: stop now and then think I'll pick it up in

1033
00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:48,640
Speaker 4: a couple of years again, it's not going to happen,

1034
00:58:48,920 --> 00:58:51,320
Speaker 4: you know. And I think, you know, to keep yourself,

1035
00:58:52,480 --> 00:58:56,080
Speaker 4: you know, healthy and happy and mentally strong and all

1036
00:58:56,200 --> 00:58:58,880
Speaker 4: those different reasons, you've got to keep moving. You've got

1037
00:58:58,920 --> 00:59:01,120
Speaker 4: to keep using that shit, you know, And you talked about,

1038
00:59:02,160 --> 00:59:05,240
Speaker 4: you know, a little while ago, going through the work

1039
00:59:05,320 --> 00:59:10,560
Speaker 4: I did without PTSD. And I know that I'm the

1040
00:59:10,680 --> 00:59:13,880
Speaker 4: best version of myself when I've got a good base

1041
00:59:14,240 --> 00:59:17,760
Speaker 4: of fitness and I'm doing something, whether it's running or writing,

1042
00:59:18,200 --> 00:59:22,040
Speaker 4: whatever it is, that's the best version of me. So

1043
00:59:23,760 --> 00:59:26,560
Speaker 4: and I think I also need something to work towards,

1044
00:59:26,720 --> 00:59:29,920
Speaker 4: like you know, like I was running training load got

1045
00:59:29,960 --> 00:59:31,840
Speaker 4: me up to a couple of hundred kilometers a week,

1046
00:59:32,280 --> 00:59:35,479
Speaker 4: and I won't get back to that, you know, unless

1047
00:59:35,640 --> 00:59:36,600
Speaker 4: something else happens.

1048
00:59:36,680 --> 00:59:39,240
Speaker 2: But just to continue moving.

1049
00:59:39,880 --> 00:59:42,320
Speaker 4: And you know, with the travel that we do through

1050
00:59:42,880 --> 00:59:45,840
Speaker 4: different time zones and airports and all the rest, it's

1051
00:59:46,000 --> 00:59:49,720
Speaker 4: it's easy to eat ship food to to you know,

1052
00:59:49,920 --> 00:59:53,600
Speaker 4: forgo on good sleep and your health hygiene goes down

1053
00:59:53,720 --> 00:59:57,240
Speaker 4: and exercise falls out, and that just becomes a choice.

1054
00:59:57,640 --> 01:00:00,880
Speaker 4: And so for as long as I can make, I choose,

1055
01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:03,240
Speaker 4: I choose to keep doing something.

1056
01:00:04,120 --> 01:00:06,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that You've got to keep the old man.

1057
01:00:07,200 --> 01:00:09,680
Speaker 3: I've written on my bathroom or I'm a big fan

1058
01:00:09,720 --> 01:00:11,760
Speaker 3: of writing on my bathroom mirror, and something that's been

1059
01:00:11,800 --> 01:00:12,200
Speaker 3: on there for.

1060
01:00:12,240 --> 01:00:16,120
Speaker 1: A while is getting old is a privilege denied to many.

1061
01:00:16,800 --> 01:00:17,200
Speaker 2: Mm hmm.

1062
01:00:18,400 --> 01:00:20,560
Speaker 1: You know, we've just got to remember that.

1063
01:00:23,160 --> 01:00:27,400
Speaker 3: This has been freaking awesome and inspirational in equal measure.

1064
01:00:28,280 --> 01:00:28,920
Speaker 1: You actually have.

1065
01:00:29,040 --> 01:00:32,680
Speaker 3: Reminded me of a of a quote from Seneca, and

1066
01:00:32,800 --> 01:00:35,760
Speaker 3: it's a paraphras quote because his language is a bit different,

1067
01:00:35,840 --> 01:00:40,040
Speaker 3: but it's around these lines. It's like every individual burst

1068
01:00:40,080 --> 01:00:44,600
Speaker 3: of responsibility to be of value to humanity. I possible

1069
01:00:44,720 --> 01:00:48,040
Speaker 3: to benefit a large number, if not to benefit a

1070
01:00:48,120 --> 01:00:52,200
Speaker 3: smaller group, If that too seems unattainable, then to benefit

1071
01:00:52,320 --> 01:00:56,680
Speaker 3: their immediate community. But above all else they must prioritize

1072
01:00:56,800 --> 01:01:01,560
Speaker 3: self growth and personal well being. Could have been writing

1073
01:01:01,640 --> 01:01:05,200
Speaker 3: about you and right the forward of your book and

1074
01:01:05,360 --> 01:01:08,600
Speaker 3: and me it you have been of value to humanity

1075
01:01:08,640 --> 01:01:12,200
Speaker 3: and you're fucking carrying half of Australia on your shoulders,

1076
01:01:12,280 --> 01:01:15,960
Speaker 3: so that the outside benefit that you have been So

1077
01:01:17,160 --> 01:01:22,800
Speaker 3: I just salute you and then and I wish you

1078
01:01:22,920 --> 01:01:26,040
Speaker 3: all the best in your future endeavors and and just

1079
01:01:26,160 --> 01:01:30,000
Speaker 3: hope that that those challenges are are matched in your

1080
01:01:30,080 --> 01:01:32,800
Speaker 3: later years with a deep sense of contentment.

1081
01:01:33,520 --> 01:01:35,520
Speaker 2: No good on your paul, Thank you mate, that's very

1082
01:01:35,640 --> 01:01:36,080
Speaker 2: kind of you.

1083
01:01:37,680 --> 01:01:40,920
Speaker 3: So wor can people go to buy the book to

1084
01:01:41,040 --> 01:01:43,600
Speaker 3: find out more about you can we still donate to

1085
01:01:43,720 --> 01:01:46,640
Speaker 3: the charity and and you know, nudge that up a

1086
01:01:46,680 --> 01:01:48,720
Speaker 3: little bit more towards that million years.

1087
01:01:48,880 --> 01:01:49,640
Speaker 2: Sure mate. Yeah.

1088
01:01:49,760 --> 01:01:53,640
Speaker 4: So firstly, the book available everywhere, you know, through your

1089
01:01:54,120 --> 01:01:59,120
Speaker 4: ratails or book type here or or through l Hands

1090
01:01:59,120 --> 01:02:01,680
Speaker 4: across the Water. So I've done an audiobook as well

1091
01:02:01,880 --> 01:02:06,400
Speaker 4: and writing this book, I gave all the profits for

1092
01:02:06,520 --> 01:02:08,480
Speaker 4: the life of the book up to the charity, and

1093
01:02:09,920 --> 01:02:13,000
Speaker 4: if you buy it through our website at Hands across

1094
01:02:13,080 --> 01:02:16,000
Speaker 4: the Water dott org dot au, all the profits come

1095
01:02:16,080 --> 01:02:19,080
Speaker 4: back in to support the kids. Or if your audiobooks

1096
01:02:19,160 --> 01:02:21,520
Speaker 4: you go, you can get that one through there as well.

1097
01:02:22,440 --> 01:02:26,320
Speaker 4: My personal staff is either through people can follow along

1098
01:02:26,400 --> 01:02:28,840
Speaker 4: on what we're doing through Instagram or it's just through

1099
01:02:29,000 --> 01:02:33,240
Speaker 4: my website, which is Peter Bains dot com dot au. Yeah,

1100
01:02:33,560 --> 01:02:36,760
Speaker 4: like there's always we're always raising money, you know, like

1101
01:02:36,920 --> 01:02:40,200
Speaker 4: there's we sent six kids off to UNI this year,

1102
01:02:41,240 --> 01:02:43,240
Speaker 4: you know, one of them studying one of the young

1103
01:02:43,320 --> 01:02:45,920
Speaker 4: girls is studying engineering, which I just love, you know,

1104
01:02:46,160 --> 01:02:48,840
Speaker 4: because you know that type of you know thing for

1105
01:02:49,000 --> 01:02:51,960
Speaker 4: the girls in Thailand. I love it that they're doing that.

1106
01:02:52,200 --> 01:02:56,600
Speaker 4: One studying marine biology and other studying law, so we're

1107
01:02:56,600 --> 01:03:00,280
Speaker 4: always you know, looking to support there so anyway wants

1108
01:03:00,320 --> 01:03:03,200
Speaker 4: to learn more about the charity or potentially join us

1109
01:03:03,240 --> 01:03:06,080
Speaker 4: on a bike ride hands across the water as a

1110
01:03:06,160 --> 01:03:06,760
Speaker 4: placed ahead.

1111
01:03:07,600 --> 01:03:11,480
Speaker 1: Awesome, good stuff, excellent, Thank you buddy. Cheers