WEBVTT - Eggs & champagne is all we need

0:00:05.921 --> 0:00:07.281
<v Speaker 1>Apodjeke Production.

0:00:23.241 --> 0:00:26.321
<v Speaker 2>Welcome back to another episode of Am I A Bad Mom?

0:00:26.481 --> 0:00:26.961
<v Speaker 1>Podcast?

0:00:27.001 --> 0:00:29.561
<v Speaker 2>That's the question we constantly ask, am I a bad mum?

0:00:30.121 --> 0:00:31.681
<v Speaker 2>Sometimes we are and sometimes we're not.

0:00:31.841 --> 0:00:34.081
<v Speaker 1>I have great days and I have shitty days. That's okay.

0:00:34.361 --> 0:00:36.800
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, as long as there's some good ones in between,

0:00:37.081 --> 0:00:38.041
<v Speaker 3>that's all that matters.

0:00:38.281 --> 0:00:40.840
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it does baffle me. I know I say this

0:00:40.921 --> 0:00:43.800
<v Speaker 2>all the time, but there's no kind of like training

0:00:43.921 --> 0:00:46.160
<v Speaker 2>course or anything like that you have to go, and

0:00:46.441 --> 0:00:49.921
<v Speaker 2>you don't even have to like do an online read this.

0:00:50.641 --> 0:00:54.161
<v Speaker 2>Think about the amount of fucking up our kids we

0:00:54.241 --> 0:00:57.280
<v Speaker 2>do and have done over the years, like our parents.

0:00:57.321 --> 0:01:00.761
<v Speaker 2>And when you look into trauma and whenever you go

0:01:01.041 --> 0:01:04.280
<v Speaker 2>to see a counselor it's from stuff that your parents

0:01:04.281 --> 0:01:07.201
<v Speaker 2>have passed on. Usually Yeah, and we're still doing that

0:01:07.241 --> 0:01:09.401
<v Speaker 2>to our kids. So at what point are they going

0:01:09.481 --> 0:01:13.000
<v Speaker 2>to go, Okay, let's start trading pairents.

0:01:13.000 --> 0:01:15.920
<v Speaker 1>Well, let's just filter through. You can have one, you can't,

0:01:16.041 --> 0:01:18.441
<v Speaker 1>you can have one, you can't, you can have one.

0:01:18.840 --> 0:01:21.000
<v Speaker 1>It's like a process of elimination.

0:01:21.801 --> 0:01:25.241
<v Speaker 3>I was twenty eight, twenty seven, twenty eight when I

0:01:25.280 --> 0:01:28.720
<v Speaker 3>had our first so that I would have been considered

0:01:28.761 --> 0:01:31.801
<v Speaker 3>like back in the day up late moum oh. Do

0:01:31.840 --> 0:01:34.161
<v Speaker 3>you think back in the day whenever I was having them,

0:01:34.321 --> 0:01:37.041
<v Speaker 3>like suep Like my mom had her first child when

0:01:37.041 --> 0:01:39.121
<v Speaker 3>she was eighteen or nineteen.

0:01:39.321 --> 0:01:42.041
<v Speaker 2>Oh wow, yeah, But then I would say twenty seven,

0:01:42.121 --> 0:01:43.481
<v Speaker 2>twenty eight these days is.

0:01:43.521 --> 0:01:46.440
<v Speaker 1>Young young, yeah, I know. And I was twenty five

0:01:46.961 --> 0:01:48.841
<v Speaker 1>and I feel like that was young. Yeah.

0:01:48.841 --> 0:01:51.921
<v Speaker 2>But then I've got friends these days. I've got a

0:01:51.961 --> 0:01:55.201
<v Speaker 2>friend who is a year older than me, So she's

0:01:55.281 --> 0:02:01.081
<v Speaker 2>forty ish forty ish forty two and has a two

0:02:01.161 --> 0:02:03.481
<v Speaker 2>year old. So she had a baby at forty Yeah.

0:02:03.681 --> 0:02:05.961
<v Speaker 1>Some people choose to do that. Geez, I think that

0:02:05.961 --> 0:02:08.121
<v Speaker 1>would be exhausting. I just think of my body.

0:02:08.201 --> 0:02:11.361
<v Speaker 3>Actually, I just remember the impact that my body took.

0:02:12.001 --> 0:02:14.201
<v Speaker 3>And I was what twenty eight and thirty when I

0:02:14.240 --> 0:02:18.641
<v Speaker 3>had the girls, My hips everything was just like WHOA wrecked.

0:02:18.921 --> 0:02:21.641
<v Speaker 2>Over the years, I've definitely had my kids go why

0:02:21.721 --> 0:02:22.681
<v Speaker 2>is your tummy like that?

0:02:22.761 --> 0:02:23.161
<v Speaker 1>Why is it?

0:02:23.641 --> 0:02:25.641
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, it's you, It's your fault.

0:02:26.321 --> 0:02:27.321
<v Speaker 1>I get that a lot.

0:02:27.680 --> 0:02:30.761
<v Speaker 3>It's gone from being you know, like fun and cute

0:02:31.081 --> 0:02:33.441
<v Speaker 3>when they're younger and they have a shower with you,

0:02:33.601 --> 0:02:36.120
<v Speaker 3>and it's like fun and cute and they go like, oh, mommy,

0:02:36.161 --> 0:02:37.881
<v Speaker 3>why does your JJ look like that?

0:02:38.321 --> 0:02:38.761
<v Speaker 1>Now?

0:02:38.960 --> 0:02:40.361
<v Speaker 2>What's the string hanging? O?

0:02:40.520 --> 0:02:40.601
<v Speaker 3>What?

0:02:42.561 --> 0:02:44.481
<v Speaker 1>Why are you taking so long in the toilet?

0:02:45.041 --> 0:02:47.881
<v Speaker 3>All of those funny, like little quirky things that they

0:02:47.960 --> 0:02:50.201
<v Speaker 3>used to say when they were little. And then now

0:02:50.401 --> 0:02:53.120
<v Speaker 3>I will be having a shower and they'll come down

0:02:53.161 --> 0:02:55.481
<v Speaker 3>because it's the time that you talk to mum. Right

0:02:55.761 --> 0:02:58.081
<v Speaker 3>for our household is like Mum's in the shower, quick,

0:02:58.121 --> 0:03:01.000
<v Speaker 3>she's locked in a small cube space. I need to

0:03:01.041 --> 0:03:04.961
<v Speaker 3>talk to her now now. With their ages, they sorted

0:03:05.121 --> 0:03:09.001
<v Speaker 3>don't look at you fun and inquisitively. They look at

0:03:09.001 --> 0:03:12.961
<v Speaker 3>you like they're almost like analyzing every inch of your body,

0:03:13.240 --> 0:03:16.121
<v Speaker 3>to the point that I feel like you're like, what

0:03:16.161 --> 0:03:17.160
<v Speaker 3>are you staring at?

0:03:17.201 --> 0:03:17.761
<v Speaker 1>Are you good?

0:03:18.281 --> 0:03:20.401
<v Speaker 3>You sort of start questioning like what's wrong?

0:03:20.520 --> 0:03:22.001
<v Speaker 1>Is my boop hanging lower than the other?

0:03:22.121 --> 0:03:25.361
<v Speaker 3>Like, and I'm standing there just genuinely looking around for

0:03:25.641 --> 0:03:29.240
<v Speaker 3>what's wrong, rather than it being fun and inquisitive anymore.

0:03:29.361 --> 0:03:31.520
<v Speaker 2>Rice, This is what I tell you about teenagers. This

0:03:31.601 --> 0:03:34.721
<v Speaker 2>is the transition period you're going through at the moment

0:03:35.001 --> 0:03:39.641
<v Speaker 2>from kids to teenagers, and your self esteem will slowly

0:03:39.681 --> 0:03:42.241
<v Speaker 2>get lower and lower and less and less, and you'll

0:03:42.241 --> 0:03:45.761
<v Speaker 2>feel more shit about yourself, to the point where they

0:03:45.841 --> 0:03:48.281
<v Speaker 2>will walk out one day and go, what the fuck

0:03:48.281 --> 0:04:00.441
<v Speaker 2>are you wearing? And you'll cry, am I about Mum

0:04:00.681 --> 0:04:02.361
<v Speaker 2>for leaving them to it?

0:04:03.081 --> 0:04:04.041
<v Speaker 1>Leaving them to it?

0:04:04.241 --> 0:04:09.801
<v Speaker 2>I mean a real cool today.

0:04:10.681 --> 0:04:13.361
<v Speaker 1>Just really, what you think? I'm in a pickle today

0:04:13.361 --> 0:04:14.961
<v Speaker 1>and I really don't know what to do about it. Well,

0:04:15.001 --> 0:04:15.880
<v Speaker 1>what do you want me to do?

0:04:16.081 --> 0:04:19.241
<v Speaker 2>I don't think I've said I'm in a pickle for years.

0:04:20.241 --> 0:04:22.641
<v Speaker 1>That language come from. I'm in a real pickle.

0:04:22.320 --> 0:04:25.681
<v Speaker 2>Today, Pip, Pip, tell you how if we go.

0:04:29.921 --> 0:04:37.600
<v Speaker 1>I really don't know. I don't know what. I really

0:04:37.761 --> 0:04:40.681
<v Speaker 1>just don't know. I don't know if I'm a pickle

0:04:40.841 --> 0:04:42.001
<v Speaker 1>or in a pickle or.

0:04:43.961 --> 0:04:44.121
<v Speaker 3>So.

0:04:44.481 --> 0:04:46.921
<v Speaker 2>This wasn't going to be the topic of conversation, but

0:04:47.001 --> 0:04:49.481
<v Speaker 2>this is relevant for right now, right because we are

0:04:49.521 --> 0:04:51.121
<v Speaker 2>about to get a cyclone.

0:04:51.440 --> 0:04:53.481
<v Speaker 1>Apparently apparently they reckon.

0:04:53.521 --> 0:04:56.881
<v Speaker 2>It's the first time in fifty years or something cyclone

0:04:56.961 --> 0:05:00.761
<v Speaker 2>has hit the city and it hasn't just been offshore,

0:05:01.401 --> 0:05:04.721
<v Speaker 2>and so there's all this hype around it. This morning,

0:05:05.201 --> 0:05:07.960
<v Speaker 2>Worths had no bottled water or toilet paper left.

0:05:08.041 --> 0:05:11.801
<v Speaker 1>I was like, oh God, it's giving real covies here

0:05:11.880 --> 0:05:12.201
<v Speaker 1>it is.

0:05:12.641 --> 0:05:15.481
<v Speaker 2>But it's the not knowing, right because I remember this

0:05:15.561 --> 0:05:18.841
<v Speaker 2>happened a while ago, a few years ago, and there

0:05:18.841 --> 0:05:20.641
<v Speaker 2>was an email from the school and it said, come

0:05:20.681 --> 0:05:23.881
<v Speaker 2>and get the kids. We're closing the school. Big storm coming.

0:05:24.521 --> 0:05:30.481
<v Speaker 2>You know, everybody stay safe, shut your doors, window And

0:05:31.001 --> 0:05:33.801
<v Speaker 2>I remember picking the kids up from school and we

0:05:33.801 --> 0:05:35.921
<v Speaker 2>were driving home and I looked up and it was

0:05:35.961 --> 0:05:40.801
<v Speaker 2>blue skies, sunshine, not a breeze in the air, and

0:05:40.841 --> 0:05:42.401
<v Speaker 2>I was like, what.

0:05:42.361 --> 0:05:44.520
<v Speaker 1>Are we doing? What is all this hype about?

0:05:44.601 --> 0:05:46.481
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I get it, And it was a nothing event,

0:05:46.561 --> 0:05:47.320
<v Speaker 2>nothing happened.

0:05:47.401 --> 0:05:48.601
<v Speaker 1>However, you just.

0:05:48.561 --> 0:05:51.481
<v Speaker 2>Don't know because everyone's saying we're going to lose power.

0:05:51.561 --> 0:05:53.161
<v Speaker 2>Make sure you've got batteries and.

0:05:53.161 --> 0:05:57.241
<v Speaker 1>Your torches and charged, and.

0:05:57.161 --> 0:06:00.921
<v Speaker 2>You've got charge enough food, and they're talking about getting

0:06:01.001 --> 0:06:04.200
<v Speaker 2>sandbags because it's gonna flood and all the rest of it. Anyway,

0:06:04.281 --> 0:06:06.841
<v Speaker 2>that's what's happening right now. Okay, let's go back six

0:06:06.921 --> 0:06:10.161
<v Speaker 2>months when I find out that the girls are doing

0:06:10.161 --> 0:06:14.641
<v Speaker 2>a hospitality course up in NUSA for three nights. They're

0:06:14.641 --> 0:06:16.440
<v Speaker 2>going to be away for three nights. They're not going

0:06:16.521 --> 0:06:18.840
<v Speaker 2>to need us, and so Jay and I got super

0:06:18.880 --> 0:06:20.201
<v Speaker 2>excited and went, oh, my.

0:06:20.081 --> 0:06:22.561
<v Speaker 1>Goodness, what should we do? Let's go to Fiji? Yeah

0:06:22.961 --> 0:06:24.601
<v Speaker 1>for three nights. Perfect.

0:06:25.081 --> 0:06:29.841
<v Speaker 2>We had up until Sunday night at midnight for free cancelation.

0:06:30.521 --> 0:06:34.880
<v Speaker 2>Monday morning, the nooser trip for the girls is canceled.

0:06:35.440 --> 0:06:36.681
<v Speaker 1>So they're not going now.

0:06:37.361 --> 0:06:41.921
<v Speaker 3>No, so are canceled because of the cyclone that's coming.

0:06:41.961 --> 0:06:42.921
<v Speaker 1>It's meant to me this week.

0:06:43.001 --> 0:06:45.521
<v Speaker 3>By next week it's new news, Like what what?

0:06:46.081 --> 0:06:47.400
<v Speaker 1>This is crazy? Yeah?

0:06:47.440 --> 0:06:50.121
<v Speaker 2>Anyway, they're crossing the t's dotting the eyes, making sure

0:06:50.161 --> 0:06:53.401
<v Speaker 2>everybody's safe, and they've canceled the trip. So like, okay,

0:06:53.841 --> 0:06:58.440
<v Speaker 2>well that's okay. My girls are sixteen, they'll figure something out.

0:06:58.481 --> 0:07:00.841
<v Speaker 2>They can be home, they can have a friend over,

0:07:01.281 --> 0:07:05.001
<v Speaker 2>they can they can get to and from. Yeah, look

0:07:05.281 --> 0:07:08.080
<v Speaker 2>like school's probably going to be closed too. And so

0:07:08.281 --> 0:07:11.201
<v Speaker 2>now in my mind, rate is I'm like, first of all,

0:07:11.521 --> 0:07:14.681
<v Speaker 2>do I want to fly to Fiji in a cyclone?

0:07:15.161 --> 0:07:20.201
<v Speaker 2>And secondly do I want to leave my kids? Who, yes,

0:07:20.241 --> 0:07:22.721
<v Speaker 2>they're sixteen and can look after themselves, But still do

0:07:22.761 --> 0:07:24.081
<v Speaker 2>I want to leave them.

0:07:24.321 --> 0:07:27.041
<v Speaker 1>In a cyclone? In a cyclone I think.

0:07:26.841 --> 0:07:30.361
<v Speaker 2>Where they might have no power, there may be some flooding.

0:07:30.681 --> 0:07:33.601
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, like I think that you're putting them up again

0:07:33.761 --> 0:07:35.601
<v Speaker 3>some tough odds by themselves.

0:07:36.241 --> 0:07:36.481
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:07:36.481 --> 0:07:38.681
<v Speaker 3>So I mean, I'm just saying, like if it does

0:07:38.841 --> 0:07:42.801
<v Speaker 3>really come to fruition of what they're saying, like, I'm

0:07:42.841 --> 0:07:44.881
<v Speaker 3>just saying this because we've been through it a few

0:07:44.921 --> 0:07:46.321
<v Speaker 3>times growing up in Townsville.

0:07:46.441 --> 0:07:50.161
<v Speaker 1>Like we've gone through this cycle of go.

0:07:50.161 --> 0:07:54.241
<v Speaker 3>The shops by everything, come home, no cyclone or you know,

0:07:54.361 --> 0:07:57.241
<v Speaker 3>go the shops, don't have anything, come home, just go

0:07:57.361 --> 0:08:00.121
<v Speaker 3>through the cyclone and then everything's back to normal the

0:08:00.161 --> 0:08:03.041
<v Speaker 3>next day. Obviously a few more trees down, a few

0:08:03.041 --> 0:08:04.681
<v Speaker 3>things you have to clean up, and all the rest.

0:08:04.721 --> 0:08:06.481
<v Speaker 1>But it was like we.

0:08:06.481 --> 0:08:08.401
<v Speaker 3>Went through I think it was a Cat three and

0:08:08.441 --> 0:08:09.081
<v Speaker 3>a Cat four.

0:08:09.521 --> 0:08:10.961
<v Speaker 1>One of them was super spicy.

0:08:11.481 --> 0:08:13.841
<v Speaker 3>It was just like felt like when it had finished,

0:08:14.041 --> 0:08:16.041
<v Speaker 3>like everything sort of went back to normal, Which is

0:08:16.081 --> 0:08:19.561
<v Speaker 3>why I'm saying like this is very relevant definitely, But

0:08:19.641 --> 0:08:21.121
<v Speaker 3>why are we canceling next week?

0:08:21.161 --> 0:08:23.481
<v Speaker 1>I thought it was just this week, like I thought

0:08:23.521 --> 0:08:23.921
<v Speaker 1>it was well.

0:08:24.001 --> 0:08:25.921
<v Speaker 2>And I also feel like they don't know very much,

0:08:25.961 --> 0:08:31.161
<v Speaker 2>so they're going, Okay, so by Thursday afternoon, it's going

0:08:31.241 --> 0:08:31.720
<v Speaker 2>to turn.

0:08:31.801 --> 0:08:33.961
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, how do you know what's going to turn? Hey,

0:08:34.201 --> 0:08:36.761
<v Speaker 1>Afrid's going to turn? What if he changes his mind.

0:08:36.841 --> 0:08:37.801
<v Speaker 1>What if he goes the other way.

0:08:38.081 --> 0:08:40.521
<v Speaker 3>I had another friend saying the same thing, Oh my gosh,

0:08:40.601 --> 0:08:41.401
<v Speaker 3>I'm booked to go to.

0:08:41.361 --> 0:08:43.641
<v Speaker 1>Melbourne and booked to go to Melbourne on the day

0:08:43.681 --> 0:08:44.081
<v Speaker 1>that the.

0:08:44.041 --> 0:08:45.681
<v Speaker 3>Cyclone's meant to hear it. And I was like, well,

0:08:45.721 --> 0:08:48.361
<v Speaker 3>just change it and go the night before. You have

0:08:48.481 --> 0:08:50.521
<v Speaker 3>like twenty minutes of bumps going out, but you'll be

0:08:50.601 --> 0:08:51.561
<v Speaker 3>fine after that.

0:08:51.721 --> 0:08:53.921
<v Speaker 1>Same with you, kd just get on a plane.

0:08:54.041 --> 0:08:55.841
<v Speaker 3>I think by the time you're getting on a plane,

0:08:55.961 --> 0:08:57.961
<v Speaker 3>I think we're going to be through quite the thick

0:08:58.001 --> 0:09:00.521
<v Speaker 3>of it. And I think, if I'm really gauging right,

0:09:00.641 --> 0:09:03.361
<v Speaker 3>and I'm hoping, I am gunning towards it, next week

0:09:03.441 --> 0:09:04.321
<v Speaker 3>school will be back.

0:09:04.521 --> 0:09:07.641
<v Speaker 2>This was going to be a topic for the podcast anyway,

0:09:07.801 --> 0:09:09.321
<v Speaker 2>before I knew about the cyclone.

0:09:09.361 --> 0:09:10.641
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, this is just an ad blone.

0:09:10.681 --> 0:09:13.361
<v Speaker 2>And before I got into a pickle, because it wasn't

0:09:13.401 --> 0:09:16.961
<v Speaker 2>a pickle beforehand. The only pickle was my kids going,

0:09:17.281 --> 0:09:19.961
<v Speaker 2>why you have to go away somewhere. Every time we're

0:09:20.001 --> 0:09:23.881
<v Speaker 2>going to be away, all our friends are like, your

0:09:23.921 --> 0:09:26.681
<v Speaker 2>parents are going to Fiji. I'm like, your friends don't

0:09:26.761 --> 0:09:30.561
<v Speaker 2>understand how it was having kids for sixteen years with

0:09:30.641 --> 0:09:33.281
<v Speaker 2>no family around and no one to have you. Guys,

0:09:33.441 --> 0:09:36.841
<v Speaker 2>we took you on our freaking honeymoon and now you're

0:09:36.881 --> 0:09:38.361
<v Speaker 2>having a gun and shaving me.

0:09:38.921 --> 0:09:42.721
<v Speaker 3>Just don't judge me. Judgment judgment free zone, bro. Just

0:09:42.841 --> 0:09:45.401
<v Speaker 3>go off to your thing, be quiet, and go back

0:09:45.441 --> 0:09:45.961
<v Speaker 3>to school.

0:09:46.001 --> 0:09:46.881
<v Speaker 1>And especially if.

0:09:46.761 --> 0:09:49.601
<v Speaker 2>I get on the plane and there's like the cyclone's

0:09:49.641 --> 0:09:52.241
<v Speaker 2>hit there's a blackout, it's.

0:09:52.081 --> 0:09:52.841
<v Speaker 1>Going to be done.

0:09:53.321 --> 0:09:56.441
<v Speaker 3>All I'm saying is by the time I think the

0:09:56.481 --> 0:10:00.321
<v Speaker 3>anticipation obviously, yes, I absolutely am not taking away from

0:10:00.361 --> 0:10:02.921
<v Speaker 3>everything that you're feeling right now about the possibility of

0:10:03.001 --> 0:10:05.961
<v Speaker 3>leaving a kids home in a cyclone all the rest,

0:10:06.481 --> 0:10:07.241
<v Speaker 3>I get it.

0:10:07.561 --> 0:10:08.721
<v Speaker 1>I'm not taking away from that.

0:10:08.841 --> 0:10:11.321
<v Speaker 3>But I'm saying that I think that the heat of

0:10:11.361 --> 0:10:14.081
<v Speaker 3>it is going to be here and Fiji's over here, okay.

0:10:14.281 --> 0:10:18.361
<v Speaker 1>And it's resilience. Yeah, it's resilience. I mean, what is resilient.

0:10:18.441 --> 0:10:20.841
<v Speaker 2>Mum left us at home on our own cyclone we

0:10:20.881 --> 0:10:22.281
<v Speaker 2>had no power and it flooded.

0:10:22.961 --> 0:10:25.041
<v Speaker 3>It'll definitely show up things that you might need to

0:10:25.041 --> 0:10:27.961
<v Speaker 3>work on later on in life about resilience building.

0:10:28.121 --> 0:10:29.521
<v Speaker 2>And then off we go to Fiji.

0:10:29.801 --> 0:10:31.561
<v Speaker 1>Might, yeah, I might come to Fiji.

0:10:31.681 --> 0:10:34.121
<v Speaker 3>I mean I'd rather have people waiting on me and

0:10:34.161 --> 0:10:37.361
<v Speaker 3>for three days than being here in this cyclonic bullshit.

0:10:38.401 --> 0:10:41.561
<v Speaker 3>Just wrapping up with this though, like, let's do a pole.

0:10:41.721 --> 0:10:46.321
<v Speaker 3>Do you think I've got enough life saving storage of food,

0:10:46.481 --> 0:10:49.641
<v Speaker 3>toilet paper, and water and milk in my house still?

0:10:49.681 --> 0:10:52.321
<v Speaker 1>Are you asking? You're answering my pole?

0:10:52.441 --> 0:10:56.001
<v Speaker 3>Yes? No, none, No, I'll get a few bottles of champagne.

0:10:56.001 --> 0:10:59.401
<v Speaker 1>Put them in that they can eat eggs.

0:10:59.561 --> 0:11:02.561
<v Speaker 2>I got eggs, eggs, and champagne.

0:11:02.881 --> 0:11:05.441
<v Speaker 1>We're gonna have a party, girls, Zo