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Speaker 1: Hello, t yp family. I hope you're good. I think

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Speaker 1: this might be my first solo for the year. Now

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Speaker 1: that could be good or bad depending on your predilection.

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Speaker 1: Is that the word preference? Anyway? So I want to

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Speaker 1: talk to you about a thing that I call the

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Speaker 1: U gap. And the U gap just means on planet

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Speaker 1: Crag anyway. It means the space between the metaphoric or

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Speaker 1: literal space in some senses, between where you are now

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Speaker 1: listening to this and where you want to be. So,

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Speaker 1: where am I, say, physically or mentally, or financially or professionally,

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Speaker 1: or personally or sociologically, like, where am I in my

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Speaker 1: life in that part of my life? How am I going,

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Speaker 1: what's going great? What's not going great? What are my

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Speaker 1: results telling me? All that? Where am I? And where

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Speaker 1: do I want to be? Let's just round it up

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Speaker 1: or down and let's just go a year. It could

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Speaker 1: be three weeks, it could be three months, six months,

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Speaker 1: could be ten years, right, but just a future version

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Speaker 1: of you, and I think it's good to try to

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Speaker 1: identify what is the gap between where I am and

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Speaker 1: where I want to be, or who I am behaviorally

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Speaker 1: or practically or financially, and who I want to be.

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Speaker 1: We all have a gap so well. I don't think

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Speaker 1: I've met anyone who doesn't. I don't think I've ever

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Speaker 1: met anyone who has zero aspiration or ambition or intention

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Speaker 1: or hope to be a slightly better version of themselves

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Speaker 1: in some way at some point in the future. So

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Speaker 1: I think we all have that gap. But it's trying

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Speaker 1: to identify what that gap is, what that means to us,

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Speaker 1: how important it is to us, and what's at the

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Speaker 1: what's the underlying cause of the gap. What are we

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Speaker 1: doing too much of or not enough of, or what

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Speaker 1: are we not thinking about or not addressing, and what

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Speaker 1: do we need to do? And like the tough thing

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Speaker 1: about one of the many tough things about being a

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Speaker 1: human is that we're emotional, and when it comes to us,

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Speaker 1: we're often very unreasonable. We're often very hard on ourselves,

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Speaker 1: or at other times the other end of the scale.

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Speaker 1: We just want instant gratification and fun and easy and

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Speaker 1: quick and painless, so we just hit up on all

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Speaker 1: the fun stuff, the comfortable stuff. But there's always some

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Speaker 1: kind of underlying reason or cause or mechanism that's keeping

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Speaker 1: us behaviorally or psychologically or physiologically or financially trapped in

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Speaker 1: a spot that we don't want to be, which is

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Speaker 1: not say life is currently shit. It's not say that

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Speaker 1: at all. It's just to say that many of us

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Speaker 1: have wanted to be in inverted commas b in another

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Speaker 1: place for a very long time, but we're not there

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Speaker 1: for whatever reason, you know, Like there was a time

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Speaker 1: when I was working on the gym floor and then

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Speaker 1: I realized I wanted to own a business. I want

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Speaker 1: to work for me. So there's the oh, well, here

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Speaker 1: I am working in this place for this much though,

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Speaker 1: for this bloke, in these circumstances, in this culture, it's okay,

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Speaker 1: but I don't love it. You know, it's a five

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Speaker 1: out of ten. I don't love it. It's not My

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Speaker 1: life is not horrible, but this is not where I

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Speaker 1: want to be. So then I would and I did.

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Speaker 1: In that moment, I'd go, well, this is my current status, situation, income, environment, circumstance,

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Speaker 1: level of responsibility, level of power. I wasn't running the show.

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Speaker 1: I couldn't run the show because it wasn't my business.

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Speaker 1: And this is where I would like to be at

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Speaker 1: some stage in the future. I don't necessarily think I

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Speaker 1: timelined it to win it within a day or a

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Speaker 1: month even, but just to recognize that this ain't it

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Speaker 1: for me. This is okay, but this ain't it in

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Speaker 1: inverted commas for me. And then what does it look like?

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Speaker 1: You know? And you're always redefining and kind of realigning

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Speaker 1: and thinking about what that means over time, and that

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Speaker 1: you know that what it will look like, what will

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Speaker 1: be the ideal situation, circumstance, scenario, income, culture, environment, task, role,

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Speaker 1: job that will be different for you at different times,

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Speaker 1: just as it has been for me. But right now

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Speaker 1: I'm listening to this. You know, where are you at

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Speaker 1: and where would you like to be? And what is

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Speaker 1: that gap? And let's see if we can talk about

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Speaker 1: bridging it. So what I've done, Groovers, is I have

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Speaker 1: broken it down into kind of like the macro and

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Speaker 1: the micro. There's the big rocks and the pebbles, and

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Speaker 1: the big rocks of which I speak grasshoppers are ah

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Speaker 1: for today anyway. They are these physical health, mental health,

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Speaker 1: lifestyle habits, career financial stuff, relationships stuff, brain function and

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Speaker 1: mental health stuff. And putting our current operating system under

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Speaker 1: the spotlight as well, so we can take a look

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Speaker 1: at all of these kind of individual kind of components

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Speaker 1: of the US experience, and then maybe the the micro

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Speaker 1: that sits underneath the macro of each of those headings.

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Speaker 1: So I'm not going to make this too long. It's

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Speaker 1: just kind of, I guess, an introduction to this concept

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Speaker 1: between bridging the gap, and obviously there are a lot

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Speaker 1: of gaps for many of us. Some of them are

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Speaker 1: really important. Some of them are like, yeah, I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: like I wouldn't mind being a bit better at that,

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Speaker 1: that would be nice. But if I don't get any

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Speaker 1: better at playing my guitar, that's okay. Or if I

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Speaker 1: don't lose three more kilos, that's okay. Or if my

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Speaker 1: income stays at you know, whatever it is or whatever

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Speaker 1: it is plus ten percent, I'm probably going to be okay.

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Speaker 1: So it's not a big thing, but there will be

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Speaker 1: big things like I cannot currently or I can't continue

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Speaker 1: on my current workload, so the hours I work, the

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Speaker 1: stress that it puts me under the level of sleep

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Speaker 1: that I'm getting, like, it's just not working. So that's

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Speaker 1: something that really needs to be addressed and immediately. So

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Speaker 1: top of the list is physical health, and in that

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Speaker 1: like no surprises here, I think When I think about

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Speaker 1: my physical health, I think about the impact of food

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Speaker 1: and everyone's physical health. Is how I frame it food?

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Speaker 1: How much am I eating? Am I overeating? Am I

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Speaker 1: under eating? And am I eating high quality food? Where

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Speaker 1: do I get it from? Do I prepare it? Is

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Speaker 1: it ultra processed? Is it somewhat wholesome and closer towards

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Speaker 1: the organic end of the spectrum? How do I eat

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Speaker 1: in terms of my relationship with food? What about social eating?

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Speaker 1: What about compulsive eating? What about reactive eating? What about

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Speaker 1: numbing out with food? What about all of those things?

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Speaker 1: So I think it's just to be. And as most

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Speaker 1: of you know, my biggest challenge for a lot of

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Speaker 1: my life has been food in terms of me keeping

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Speaker 1: my shit together, managing me, making good choices, and giving

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Speaker 1: myself the best chance to live a long, healthy life.

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Speaker 1: Food has been my number one priority because that was

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Speaker 1: my biggest issue. That was my biggest kind of emotional, psychological,

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Speaker 1: behavioral tipping point. So think about the things. If food

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Speaker 1: is an issue for you, don't beat yourself out, don't

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Speaker 1: jump up and down. As emotional as we all are,

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Speaker 1: recognize the emotion around it, feel it. That's all cool.

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Speaker 1: But then try to turn that volume down a little

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Speaker 1: bit and start to be a bit strategic, just practically,

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Speaker 1: what am I doing that doesn't work? What am I

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Speaker 1: bullshitting myself about? What am I telling people that isn't true?

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Speaker 1: What am I currently doing pretty regularly that is dumb

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Speaker 1: as fuck? You know that this is You don't need

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Speaker 1: to be super educated or highly intelligent. I know most

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Speaker 1: of you are, But you don't need to be a

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Speaker 1: genius to figure this stuff out. You don't need to

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Speaker 1: be a genius to know that you are doing things

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Speaker 1: which don't align with who and how you want to be.

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Speaker 1: So food is a biggie under the banner of physical

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Speaker 1: health exercise, of course, I don't really need to explain

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Speaker 1: it to you. But more than how much do you exercise,

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Speaker 1: or do you have the perfect program, or how hard

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Speaker 1: or how easy, my kind of number one priority for

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Speaker 1: people is that they exercise consistently. Most people that I

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Speaker 1: have met over the years I'm talking about the totality

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Speaker 1: of the people I meet in life are not consistent.

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Speaker 1: And that's very reflective of the stats around exercise consistency

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Speaker 1: generally speaking in the research. So we know that a

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Speaker 1: lot of people start a lot of people stop. A

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Speaker 1: lot of people do a whole thing for a while,

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Speaker 1: they get results, then they stop, then they lose results,

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Speaker 1: and then a whole bunch of stuff happens, and then

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Speaker 1: we're getting to October November, it's getting warm in Australia anyway,

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Speaker 1: and then people go, right, that's it, I'm back baby,

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Speaker 1: And there's another cycle. It's hard to be consistent. And

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Speaker 1: it doesn't mean it's hard for everyone all the time,

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Speaker 1: but it means it's hard for a period of time

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Speaker 1: until that exercise that works for you, until that exercise

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Speaker 1: that produces the outcomes that you want becomes ingrained into

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Speaker 1: who you are, Like, this is part of your operating system. Now,

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Speaker 1: this is part of your hardwiring. This is you on default.

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Speaker 1: This is normal mode you, NM you why sorry, n

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Speaker 1: M why normal mode you? Because then once that exercise

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Speaker 1: gets integrated into our subconscious and our day to day

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Speaker 1: patterns and rules and rituals, and now this is just

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Speaker 1: us doing us. This is not us trying to be

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Speaker 1: spectacular or become an Olympian or being credible. This is

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Speaker 1: us just trying to build an operating system around As

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Speaker 1: I said, initially, food and exercise, which is going to

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Speaker 1: work for us, And by work for us, I don't

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Speaker 1: mean get us in the Olympic team or some kind

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Speaker 1: of physiological specimen that's superhuman, but rather just a version

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Speaker 1: of you that is consistently as healthy as you can be,

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Speaker 1: optimizing your physical potential. Of course, under the banner of

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Speaker 1: physical health is sleep and stress and relationships. Sleep and stress.

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Speaker 1: You kind of get it. If we're under sleep, we're

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Speaker 1: not recharging the batteries. And I actually just read an

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Speaker 1: interesting paper talking about or abstract of a paper, I'll

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Speaker 1: be more accurate about how you know, there's a thing

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Speaker 1: that happens with sleep, and that is that over time.

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Speaker 1: You know, people say I'm really good with five hours.

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Speaker 1: What happens is when you under sleep. Now, virtually nobody,

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Speaker 1: very very few people can be consistently physiologically healthy on

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Speaker 1: five hours sleep. There may be a few unicorns out there.

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Speaker 1: But what's happened with many people who go, oh, I'm

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Speaker 1: great with five or six hours is that their body

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Speaker 1: has adapted so that they feel good, so they have

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Speaker 1: the perception of I'm okay, while below the surface physiologically

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Speaker 1: things are not okay. So we don't even know sometimes

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Speaker 1: because we can't pick up on the data on the

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Speaker 1: biodata that our body is sending us so sleep, even

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Speaker 1: if you think you're going okay sometimes with four or

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Speaker 1: five six hours sleep, the research seems to suggest, and

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Speaker 1: my observation and work with people seems to suggest that

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Speaker 1: there are very few people who can consistently live on

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Speaker 1: somewhere in the five to six hour range and be

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Speaker 1: genuinely healthy optimal immune function, cellular energy, cellular health, cognitive

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Speaker 1: function on very little sleep. And then the last one

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Speaker 1: on the list here on the physical health as relationships

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Speaker 1: and just because you know what's happening in your relationships

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Speaker 1: more specifically you'll or close relationships, it impacts you. And

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Speaker 1: this is an interesting thing because it's not something I

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Speaker 1: used to think about a whole lot. I didn't really

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Speaker 1: think about it, you know what. I didn't actually understand

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Speaker 1: it as being such an important factor in physical health

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Speaker 1: in mental health, because if your mental health is not great,

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Speaker 1: your physical health it's not going to be great, and

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Speaker 1: vice versa, like they're intertwined to think that, as I've

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Speaker 1: said many times, to think that you know, psychological, emotional

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Speaker 1: and physiological kind of states or outcomes are not intertwined

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Speaker 1: with each other. Is ignorant. It's not science, And the

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Speaker 1: only place that those three things exist in isolation. You know,

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Speaker 1: emotional stuff, psychological stuff, cognitive stuff, physiological stuff. More broadly,

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Speaker 1: the only place they operate in isolation is in research,

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Speaker 1: as in science. But as a human being just fucking

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Speaker 1: navigating life on the big spinning rock, navigating the blue. No,

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Speaker 1: all that shit's intertwined. That if something bad happens, I worry,

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Speaker 1: that affects my body, That affects my cognitive function, That

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Speaker 1: affects my nervous system, my emotional state, my ability to

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Speaker 1: think clearly, to communicate rationally. Everything is intertwined with everything

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Speaker 1: with us humans. So having relationship problems and ranging from

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Speaker 1: not great through to horribly horribly destructive and toxic, that

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Speaker 1: has a big physical health, probably bigger than everything else

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Speaker 1: in the short term, in the short term sleep maybe

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Speaker 1: the exception. All right, mental health. So where am I

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Speaker 1: with my mental health? If I could, you know, crag

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Speaker 1: a fight and just go well, ken is I feel

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Speaker 1: fucking great? Most of the time? I don't. I feel

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Speaker 1: very stressed, very anxious. I don't feel saddy, make sad stuff.

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Speaker 1: I don't feel depressed. I kind of process life pretty

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Speaker 1: good and you know, overall, like not perfect, but overall

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Speaker 1: actually genuinely pretty good. Well, that's amazing, and I think

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Speaker 1: that's obviously possible. And I think for me, most of

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Speaker 1: the time, not all the time, but most of the time,

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Speaker 1: I'm near that end of the scale. I think if

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Speaker 1: we averaged it out for me ten being at the

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Speaker 1: end of the scale, I would think most of the

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Speaker 1: time I'm a seven to nine, And there are times

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Speaker 1: when I'm a one like you, or a three like you,

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Speaker 1: or a five like you, and maybe now and then

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Speaker 1: a ten like you for a minute. But just trying

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Speaker 1: to understand, remember I metacognition, thinking about how I think

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Speaker 1: and how I feel and who I am the way

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Speaker 1: I am trying to understand your mental health from an

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Speaker 1: anxiety point of view, from an overthinking point of view,

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Speaker 1: from the decisions that you're making every day, from the

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Speaker 1: reactions that you manifest to certain stimuli, like the way

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Speaker 1: that you respond to stuff good and bad, or people

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Speaker 1: good and bad, or situations and circumstances. Your ability that

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Speaker 1: equanimity thing that we speak about, your ability to be

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Speaker 1: the calm and the chaos. Can I be in the

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Speaker 1: middle of a shit fest and not be in a

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Speaker 1: shit state? How do I do that? And maybe that's

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Speaker 1: something you want to or need to develop over time.

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Speaker 1: How does the firefighter who's in the middle of complete

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Speaker 1: chaos and turmoil and smoke and fire and panic and

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Speaker 1: screaming people and uncertainty and danger, how does he or

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Speaker 1: she run into that environment and be exactly the person

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Speaker 1: that we need in that moment to be our best

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Speaker 1: chance of saving lives. That's fucking amazing. I love that.

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Speaker 1: So how do I become more of that? Do I

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Speaker 1: process experiences? What is do I process things? Something happens.

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Speaker 1: My go to is negative, this is bad, this is

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Speaker 1: going to end badly. There's not good, blah blah blah

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Speaker 1: blah blah, I'm an idiot, I fucked up. Whatever. So

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Speaker 1: there's the thing that happens, and there's our response, and

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Speaker 1: our response is based on our story that we tell

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Speaker 1: ourselves about the thing. An event happens and ten people

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Speaker 1: are there, so it happens to all ten. Nine people

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Speaker 1: respond absolutely fine, no major drama, trauma, stress, anxiety, and

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Speaker 1: one person in the middle of that interprets it differently,

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Speaker 1: has a very negative reaction. This is not weakness or

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Speaker 1: badness or you know, this is a human response. This

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Speaker 1: is that person's response. So thinking about how do I

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Speaker 1: change that? We can't. We can't fix that in this podcast.

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Speaker 1: But I've I've thought about these things forever. When someone

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Speaker 1: says something, why do I want to impress them? Or

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Speaker 1: when someone's around me that I think is impressive, Why

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Speaker 1: then do I try to boill? That's ego, that's insecurity,

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Speaker 1: that's self doubt, that's fear, that's all my bullshit. Now,

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Speaker 1: this is not me beating me up. This is me

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Speaker 1: understanding me. This is me recognizing how I am and

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Speaker 1: what I do and trying to park that in the

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Speaker 1: logical space, turned down on the emotion, on all my bullshit,

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Speaker 1: of which there is much, and then try and create

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Speaker 1: some kind of approach to or method or system to

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Speaker 1: do something about that. But to do something about that,

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Speaker 1: I need to understand that. I need to understand me.

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Speaker 1: I need to understand why I make the decisions I do,

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Speaker 1: Why I process things the way I do, Why I

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Speaker 1: react and respond the way I do, Why I over

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Speaker 1: or underreact, Why I blame instead of thinking, well, maybe

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Speaker 1: I'm part of the problem. Why I do that? Why

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Speaker 1: we do that. Next on my list is lifestyle, which

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Speaker 1: is more practical, so it's kind of almost a big

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Speaker 1: picture of how do I manage me in the middle

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Speaker 1: of my life? I reckon one of the most important questions.

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Speaker 1: It's very broad and it covers everything. But you know,

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Speaker 1: often even when I could be talking to one hundred

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Speaker 1: lawyers or one hundred blokes who work on a construction site,

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Speaker 1: or one hundred nurses or a thousand doesn't matter. But

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Speaker 1: even though I work in different professional environments with different

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Speaker 1: kinds of people who do different kinds of jobs and

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Speaker 1: different incomes under different circumstances, really I rarely go in

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Speaker 1: there and talk about their job or work or productivity

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Speaker 1: or you know, outcomes on a business level about how

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Speaker 1: do you manage you? Like how do you manage you

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Speaker 1: at work? And we can extrapolate this to at life.

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Speaker 1: How do you manage you? How do you manage your

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Speaker 1: mind and body and emotions and choices and actions and

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Speaker 1: reactions and energy? How do you manage that stuff? Do

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Speaker 1: you have a plan? Do you have a plan or

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Speaker 1: you just get up today and kind of do what

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Speaker 1: you did yesterday, even though yesterday was shit and the

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Speaker 1: day before was pretty shit in the last hundred days

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Speaker 1: have been somewhere between not awesome and kind of average.

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Speaker 1: Maybe for some people. Again, that's not a criticism, that's

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Speaker 1: just for some people their reality. Now, there's no magic fairy.

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Speaker 1: No one's going to come in and magic up your life.

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Speaker 1: Nobody's going to come and fix it for you. Nobody's

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Speaker 1: going to come and solve it for you. Nobody's going

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Speaker 1: to come and sprinkle happiness dust all over your s Gone.

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Speaker 1: It ain't going to happen. So we acknowledge it, we

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Speaker 1: realize it, we see it for what it is, and

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Speaker 1: we try to practically address it. And I might say, okay,

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Speaker 1: so how often do you drink booze? Someone says every night?

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Speaker 1: I go cool, Well, that's something we can change, perhaps

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Speaker 1: not easily. But do you think drinking alcohol every day

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Speaker 1: is good for your mental and emotional and physical health?

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Speaker 1: And they know the answer is no. Great, Well, now

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Speaker 1: we're starting to understand maybe one part of what the

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Speaker 1: problem might be. If we're talking on this macro level

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Speaker 1: of your life, then we talk about maybe caffeine, and

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Speaker 1: caffeine's fine but not for some people. Coffee or two

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Speaker 1: a day's great, but not seven or eight for most people. Drugs, well,

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Speaker 1: the odd voltaire and for your saren probably okay, the

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Speaker 1: odd aspro or panandole or paracetamol probably fine, depending on

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Speaker 1: the individual, of course, not recommending anything, but consistently using

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Speaker 1: drugs that are mind altering or physiologically altering in not

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Speaker 1: a good way. Well, that's problematic. And what about rest

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Speaker 1: and what about relaxing, and what about recovering? How's what's

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Speaker 1: your plan around that? How do you reset? How do

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Speaker 1: you push the reset button? How do you come back

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Speaker 1: to work all the kids or the whatever it is.

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Speaker 1: What's your little kind of metaphoric retreat from the manic?

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Speaker 1: What's your metaphoric retreat from the chaos and the busyness

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Speaker 1: and the responsibilities and the demands. And I know some

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Speaker 1: of you are going you don't understand my life, blah blah.

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Speaker 1: I get it. I get it. I understand you are

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Speaker 1: very busy. I understand. And it isn't a contest. But

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Speaker 1: for the last six years I've been working a lot.

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Speaker 1: I've been recording mostly seven podcasts a week. I've been

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Speaker 1: doing a PhD. I've been navigating old age with my parents.

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Speaker 1: I've been you know, I get it, it's and we

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Speaker 1: can either say, yeah, I'm fucking busy, Shut up, you

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Speaker 1: don't understand my life. Fuck off. We can go yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm fucking I'm busy. But is there something I can

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Speaker 1: do out of the fourteen hundred and forty minutes a day?

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Speaker 1: Is there ten minutes a day that I could do something?

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Speaker 1: Is there something little? Maybe it's five minutes that might

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Speaker 1: move the needle If I do that five minutes every

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Speaker 1: day and build it in six or seven or eight

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Speaker 1: or ten or who knows, maybe one day thirty minutes.

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Speaker 1: So we're doing this thing for thirty minutes a day,

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Speaker 1: that's so fucking great for us. But we're not doing

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Speaker 1: it for fourteen one hundred and ten minutes. That's great,

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Speaker 1: that's not a massive request. When we'd be brutally honest

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Speaker 1: and we go, well, like if I said, even though

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Speaker 1: I just told you how busy I am, do I

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Speaker 1: waste time on the phone? Fucking yes? Is it good

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Speaker 1: for me? No? Am I a dumbass? Yes? Will I

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Speaker 1: do it today later? Yes? Right? But do I do

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Speaker 1: it less than I used to? Yes? Am I working

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Speaker 1: on it? Yes? Can I find thirty minutes? Twenty minutes,

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Speaker 1: ten minutes a day if I had to, well, if

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Speaker 1: I had to, I could, well, let's just pretend that

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Speaker 1: you have to. So lifestyle is a big one. Now

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Speaker 1: these ones are a little well, the next one's a

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Speaker 1: little closer to the macro, but it's still massively important

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Speaker 1: in terms of the quality of the results that we're

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Speaker 1: producing now and will in the future, and in terms

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Speaker 1: of bridging the gap, the U gap of which we

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Speaker 1: speak grasshoppers. And that's just your current habits. Like you've

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Speaker 1: got lots of habits around the way you communicate, the

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Speaker 1: way you do your job, the way you drive to work,

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Speaker 1: the way your little rules and rituals that you do

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Speaker 1: every morning. You get up, you do this, then you

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Speaker 1: do that, then you do that, then you check that,

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Speaker 1: then you check that, then you do this, and then

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Speaker 1: eventually you walk out the door and jump in the car,

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Speaker 1: or you go to the office upstairs at home, or

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Speaker 1: you whatever it is that you do. You have rules

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Speaker 1: and rituals and habits and behaviors that are programmed into

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Speaker 1: your hard drive. And that's not good or bad, that's

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Speaker 1: just thing. So what is great for us to do

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Speaker 1: is to put our habits, good and bad, under the

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Speaker 1: spotlight what am I doing all the time that's for

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Speaker 1: the most part good for me. I can recognize that

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Speaker 1: I can go well. I walk ten thousand steps plus

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Speaker 1: a day. I lift some weights every day. I try

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Speaker 1: to be kind every day, and if I have the opportunity,

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Speaker 1: I'm kind every day. I try to eat good food.

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Speaker 1: I try to be productive, I try to be creative.

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Speaker 1: I do all of these things, which are pretty hard

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Speaker 1: whirled into who I am and how I am. I

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Speaker 1: don't always produce good results, but I try very hard

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Speaker 1: to do all of that, and truthfully, it's mostly just autopilots.

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Speaker 1: So that's a habit. There's some shit that I do

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Speaker 1: that's good. There's some shit that I do that's not good.

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Speaker 1: So have a look at the way that you do

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Speaker 1: things typically typically, and then think to yourself about whether

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Speaker 1: or not the way that you do that typically or

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Speaker 1: daily or routinely or habitually, whether or not that is

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Speaker 1: working for you, whether or not that is working for you,

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00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:06,720
Speaker 1: whether or not that's a good thing. And we don't

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Speaker 1: need to turn our life upside down in terms of

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Speaker 1: habits and behaviors by the end of the week. But

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Speaker 1: what we can do is recognize things and work on

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Speaker 1: things one at a time. I think you'll know the

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Speaker 1: story of a year and a half ago or so.

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Speaker 1: I kind of realized how few steps I was taking

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Speaker 1: because I do so much work where I am right now,

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Speaker 1: which is in my office, which is in my studio,

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Speaker 1: and I'd like, I live in this fucking chair. And

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Speaker 1: sure I would pride myself that I would go to

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Speaker 1: the gym and list shit every day, and that's good.

427
00:26:36,640 --> 00:26:39,080
Speaker 1: But there was one thing that I wasn't doing enough,

428
00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:45,320
Speaker 1: and that was just general movement. That was just incidental activity,

429
00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:49,359
Speaker 1: occupation activity. Some jobs require you to move a lot,

430
00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:52,800
Speaker 1: like I've got friends who are trades, lots of friends

431
00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:55,080
Speaker 1: who are tradees, and they would probably do ten to

432
00:26:55,119 --> 00:26:59,760
Speaker 1: twenty thousand steps a day without actually in inverted commas

433
00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:05,080
Speaker 1: going for a walk, so to speak, whereas my occupational

434
00:27:05,119 --> 00:27:10,480
Speaker 1: and incidental kind of step count is somewhere in there

435
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:14,080
Speaker 1: three to four. It's like very low. I actually have

436
00:27:14,160 --> 00:27:17,600
Speaker 1: to consciously go for walk to get so I recognize

437
00:27:17,640 --> 00:27:20,920
Speaker 1: that one little thing, Hey, Craig, walk more. I didn't

438
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:24,000
Speaker 1: change anything else. I I didn't change my food, didn't

439
00:27:24,080 --> 00:27:27,560
Speaker 1: change my last oh my kind of my operating system.

440
00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:30,920
Speaker 1: Other than that didn't change food. Everything stayed the same

441
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:36,080
Speaker 1: except that one thing, and that made a massive impact.

442
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:41,199
Speaker 1: We can move the needle. If you are currently you know,

443
00:27:41,240 --> 00:27:44,239
Speaker 1: doing three thousand steps a day, just go all right, well,

444
00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:47,280
Speaker 1: I'm going to do one thousand more. I'm going to

445
00:27:47,280 --> 00:27:49,960
Speaker 1: do four thousand, and then we'll see how long that takes.

446
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:52,560
Speaker 1: And I'm guessing that's going to take I don't know,

447
00:27:52,640 --> 00:27:56,920
Speaker 1: somewhere in the ballpark of ten minutes, ten minutes, give

448
00:27:57,040 --> 00:27:59,760
Speaker 1: or take. And then next week you might go, you

449
00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:01,840
Speaker 1: know what, I'm going to go from three to three

450
00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:03,800
Speaker 1: to four to five. I'm going to do five great

451
00:28:04,720 --> 00:28:06,880
Speaker 1: And these are just little things that are not hard,

452
00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:10,280
Speaker 1: do not require money, do not require skills, do not

453
00:28:10,400 --> 00:28:16,439
Speaker 1: require a PhD. Are they sexy? No? Is it quick? Well?

454
00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:21,280
Speaker 1: Kind of, but in the context sometimes people would go no, right,

455
00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:23,679
Speaker 1: And so much of the things that we need to

456
00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:27,320
Speaker 1: do to bridge the U gap are that, you know,

457
00:28:27,359 --> 00:28:29,280
Speaker 1: they're kind of Oh, you just got to batten down

458
00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:32,280
Speaker 1: the hatches and do the thing when no one's looking,

459
00:28:32,320 --> 00:28:36,720
Speaker 1: when it's not fun, quick, easy or painless. Got a

460
00:28:36,720 --> 00:28:40,200
Speaker 1: few to go. I'm dragging my feet our career. What

461
00:28:40,320 --> 00:28:43,000
Speaker 1: is my relationship with work? This is something I think

462
00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:48,640
Speaker 1: about a lot. I think about like me. Right now,

463
00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:50,479
Speaker 1: I'm going to give you a little bit of an

464
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:53,280
Speaker 1: insight into the Craig experience right now, so you all

465
00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:55,080
Speaker 1: know that you don't all know. Some of you have

466
00:28:56,280 --> 00:28:59,680
Speaker 1: been informed that I have this thing called U station

467
00:28:59,760 --> 00:29:03,040
Speaker 1: shoe dysfunction, and I often have blocked the ears. So

468
00:29:03,160 --> 00:29:07,959
Speaker 1: right now my right ear is really blocked. And I

469
00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:11,640
Speaker 1: started and stopped this little extravaganza about three times before

470
00:29:11,960 --> 00:29:13,880
Speaker 1: I just went fuck it. I'm just going to record,

471
00:29:13,920 --> 00:29:18,440
Speaker 1: and if my ear blocks, it blocks, and so I

472
00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:21,840
Speaker 1: don't need any sympathy. But it's actually hard for me

473
00:29:21,920 --> 00:29:24,920
Speaker 1: to do this right now because my voices echoing in

474
00:29:24,960 --> 00:29:32,400
Speaker 1: my head, which makes focus and concentration hard. But anyway,

475
00:29:32,960 --> 00:29:35,320
Speaker 1: that's just what's going on for me right now. Let's

476
00:29:35,360 --> 00:29:40,680
Speaker 1: go back to career and the consequences of staying in

477
00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:44,960
Speaker 1: a career. Perhaps that doesn't rock our boat or work

478
00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 1: for us emotionally or mentally or I'm not even talking

479
00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:51,640
Speaker 1: about practically or financially, that's a big part of it.

480
00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:56,160
Speaker 1: But here I'm talking about more what are the health

481
00:29:56,200 --> 00:30:02,080
Speaker 1: consequences of my work. I talk to people very often

482
00:30:02,360 --> 00:30:10,160
Speaker 1: whose biggest issue is not money. It is not the

483
00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:16,080
Speaker 1: job itself. It's not the work itself. It's that their

484
00:30:16,160 --> 00:30:22,960
Speaker 1: situation or environments or relationships or culture or experience at

485
00:30:23,080 --> 00:30:29,360
Speaker 1: work is shit, or their experience personally of it. Not

486
00:30:29,480 --> 00:30:33,120
Speaker 1: say everyone in the same place is feeling or experiencing

487
00:30:33,120 --> 00:30:37,320
Speaker 1: the same thing, but these people, which is very normal,

488
00:30:37,320 --> 00:30:39,800
Speaker 1: and you probably are that person at some stage. Like

489
00:30:39,840 --> 00:30:41,760
Speaker 1: going to work is not a great thing, Like you

490
00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:43,800
Speaker 1: don't get excited, you don't look forward to it, you

491
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:46,320
Speaker 1: don't love it. It's a thing you do because you

492
00:30:46,360 --> 00:30:47,880
Speaker 1: feel you have to do it. And the truth is,

493
00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:49,680
Speaker 1: for some of you, you do have to do it

494
00:30:49,720 --> 00:30:54,120
Speaker 1: because you're financially have your hands tied, so you need

495
00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:57,640
Speaker 1: to do it. And I totally understand that. So I'm

496
00:30:57,680 --> 00:31:01,800
Speaker 1: always thinking about for myself and the people like coach,

497
00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:05,080
Speaker 1: what are the health consequences of what you do of

498
00:31:05,160 --> 00:31:08,720
Speaker 1: your job and how can I change that? And even

499
00:31:08,720 --> 00:31:11,360
Speaker 1: though some people might be in a high paying, high flying,

500
00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:16,440
Speaker 1: high respect, high social status job, fuck, how important is

501
00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:22,960
Speaker 1: that social status job anyway? All that, all those boxes

502
00:31:23,000 --> 00:31:26,800
Speaker 1: are ticked from the outside looking in, tickety boo, fucking

503
00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:34,680
Speaker 1: well done, But from the inside out the experience is terrible. Emotionally, psychologically, physiologically,

504
00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:41,040
Speaker 1: experientially it's shit. So yeah, I think career and financial

505
00:31:41,080 --> 00:31:46,200
Speaker 1: staff in general. You know, financial security, your relationship with money,

506
00:31:46,360 --> 00:31:53,760
Speaker 1: stress about money. All of these things can have absolute consequences,

507
00:31:53,760 --> 00:31:55,920
Speaker 1: good or bad depending on your situation and what's going

508
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:59,480
Speaker 1: on right now for you. And then let's quickly go

509
00:31:59,600 --> 00:32:03,480
Speaker 1: through the three in the bridging the gap saga, it's

510
00:32:03,480 --> 00:32:09,920
Speaker 1: become a saga. Relationships are so our life is built

511
00:32:10,000 --> 00:32:18,840
Speaker 1: largely around relationships, friendships, work people, family people, friends, peers,

512
00:32:20,440 --> 00:32:24,719
Speaker 1: incidental people that we kind of nudge up alongside somewhat

513
00:32:24,760 --> 00:32:29,120
Speaker 1: regularly that are just in our life, perhaps circumstantially that

514
00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:34,720
Speaker 1: we didn't choose all okay, but we know that the

515
00:32:34,800 --> 00:32:37,840
Speaker 1: quality of our relationships, as I think I mentioned before,

516
00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:40,440
Speaker 1: like especially on a personal level, has a real impact

517
00:32:41,400 --> 00:32:45,000
Speaker 1: and what's going on in those relationships, and especially that

518
00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:51,480
Speaker 1: when there is emotional and psychological turmoil, even if everything

519
00:32:51,480 --> 00:32:54,240
Speaker 1: else is going great in our life, if we're in

520
00:32:54,280 --> 00:32:57,360
Speaker 1: the middle of psychological and emotional turmoil with someone that

521
00:32:57,400 --> 00:33:01,120
Speaker 1: we love or care about very much, be that intimate relationship,

522
00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:06,160
Speaker 1: a best friend or a family member, it's going to

523
00:33:06,160 --> 00:33:08,360
Speaker 1: fuck you up, and it's going to fuck you up

524
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:12,680
Speaker 1: for a while, and so trying to for me, trying

525
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:18,480
Speaker 1: to build relationships as much as I can control, not

526
00:33:18,600 --> 00:33:21,760
Speaker 1: the person, but control as much as I can or

527
00:33:21,800 --> 00:33:24,440
Speaker 1: as much as I can contribute, is better way to

528
00:33:24,440 --> 00:33:28,880
Speaker 1: say it. To a healthy relationship, Then that's what I'm

529
00:33:28,920 --> 00:33:34,600
Speaker 1: going to do. Understanding that what I think often doesn't matter,

530
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:41,400
Speaker 1: Understanding how they think is extremely important. Understanding that their

531
00:33:41,480 --> 00:33:45,800
Speaker 1: reality is not my reality. Understanding that the window through

532
00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:51,360
Speaker 1: which they view, experience, digest, and understand the world is

533
00:33:51,440 --> 00:33:54,960
Speaker 1: not the same as mine. So of course there'll be differences,

534
00:33:55,040 --> 00:33:57,520
Speaker 1: and of course I need to navigate and negotiate those,

535
00:33:58,240 --> 00:34:00,800
Speaker 1: and of course I need to I don't always do,

536
00:34:00,880 --> 00:34:03,600
Speaker 1: but I try very much to operate primarily through love,

537
00:34:04,320 --> 00:34:15,400
Speaker 1: through kindness, through compassion, through empathy, empathy, through awareness. Yeah, relationships, big, big,

538
00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:19,360
Speaker 1: think about one relationship that you have that matters to you,

539
00:34:21,080 --> 00:34:24,080
Speaker 1: that you would like to do better at. Doesn't mean

540
00:34:24,560 --> 00:34:27,240
Speaker 1: you're all the problem, doesn't mean that at all, doesn't

541
00:34:27,239 --> 00:34:30,960
Speaker 1: mean they're none of the problem, doesn't mean that at all.

542
00:34:31,000 --> 00:34:34,160
Speaker 1: My experience is that most of the time, not all.

543
00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:37,000
Speaker 1: Most of the time it's a bit of a combination

544
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:41,720
Speaker 1: of both. People Sometimes it's one hundred zero, but not often.

545
00:34:43,840 --> 00:34:49,640
Speaker 1: All right, let's do one more. So I've got to

546
00:34:49,640 --> 00:34:53,920
Speaker 1: here brain function and brain health. And I probably wouldn't

547
00:34:53,920 --> 00:34:55,719
Speaker 1: have put this in twenty or thirty years ago because

548
00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:59,440
Speaker 1: I didn't really get it. I got it theoretically, but

549
00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:03,840
Speaker 1: I didn't get at it experientially, like I get it

550
00:35:03,920 --> 00:35:07,880
Speaker 1: experientially even right now as I'm talking, because I have

551
00:35:08,000 --> 00:35:11,480
Speaker 1: low level frustration right now. That's not me being weakal terrible,

552
00:35:11,880 --> 00:35:14,040
Speaker 1: but I just like telling you. So you go, oh,

553
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:16,719
Speaker 1: he gets frustrated. Oh he has bad days. Oh he

554
00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:19,560
Speaker 1: can't fucking hear out of his right ear. Oh that

555
00:35:19,640 --> 00:35:24,080
Speaker 1: must be so imagine just put imagine cover your covering

556
00:35:24,120 --> 00:35:28,000
Speaker 1: your ear with soundproof headphones and then taping it up

557
00:35:28,040 --> 00:35:32,040
Speaker 1: with two feet of tape, and you can't hear anything. Well,

558
00:35:32,040 --> 00:35:36,399
Speaker 1: that's my experience and some right now, and sometimes that's both.

559
00:35:37,760 --> 00:35:40,200
Speaker 1: So my voice is an eleven out of ten in

560
00:35:40,239 --> 00:35:43,000
Speaker 1: my head, and your voice talking to me is a

561
00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:46,640
Speaker 1: one out of ten standing two feet from me. And

562
00:35:46,719 --> 00:35:50,000
Speaker 1: so you know in the middle of that, that affects

563
00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:55,080
Speaker 1: my brain function, affects cognition, affects my emotions, it affects

564
00:35:55,200 --> 00:36:00,279
Speaker 1: mental acuity in my ability to execute things to do

565
00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:05,360
Speaker 1: my job. So brain function, how well your brain works,

566
00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:10,440
Speaker 1: Like I said, memory, creativity, focus, mental acuity, your ability

567
00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:15,920
Speaker 1: to problem solve and talk to people and overcome conflict

568
00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:22,800
Speaker 1: and problems and navigate life on an interpersonal level, linguistically, sociologically,

569
00:36:23,480 --> 00:36:28,880
Speaker 1: practically with other humans. It's so important that your brain

570
00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:32,200
Speaker 1: works well. If you're a leader, it's important that your

571
00:36:32,239 --> 00:36:35,799
Speaker 1: brain works well, if you're a mom or a dad. Obviously,

572
00:36:35,880 --> 00:36:39,440
Speaker 1: if you're in anyone right, there's no one for whom

573
00:36:39,480 --> 00:36:43,640
Speaker 1: this is not important. And just think about those things

574
00:36:43,640 --> 00:36:48,600
Speaker 1: which might impact your brain function or your brain health.

575
00:36:48,640 --> 00:36:51,520
Speaker 1: You know what you put in your body, sleep boost,

576
00:36:51,640 --> 00:36:54,799
Speaker 1: all the things we've spoken about, and how you might

577
00:36:57,200 --> 00:37:02,520
Speaker 1: how you might improve your cognitive function or performance. So

578
00:37:04,280 --> 00:37:06,719
Speaker 1: for me, choosing to do a PhD at fifty six,

579
00:37:07,080 --> 00:37:11,160
Speaker 1: very atypical. I would say, I don't know how many

580
00:37:11,760 --> 00:37:19,000
Speaker 1: first year PhDs in psychology start at fifty six, but

581
00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:22,280
Speaker 1: I would think less than point one of one percent,

582
00:37:22,320 --> 00:37:24,520
Speaker 1: which doesn't make me good or bad. It just makes

583
00:37:24,560 --> 00:37:28,080
Speaker 1: me very atypical. And that makes me a little bit

584
00:37:28,120 --> 00:37:32,200
Speaker 1: sad because I wish people would intentionally learn as they

585
00:37:32,239 --> 00:37:35,880
Speaker 1: get older. I wish they would consciously study. If not,

586
00:37:35,960 --> 00:37:39,160
Speaker 1: I don't necessarily mean in an academic environment, but do

587
00:37:39,280 --> 00:37:43,200
Speaker 1: a project, write a book, do your own research, take

588
00:37:43,320 --> 00:37:47,800
Speaker 1: up a language. Write with your opposite hand for a week,

589
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:52,440
Speaker 1: Like I know that sounds random, but I did it

590
00:37:52,520 --> 00:37:56,160
Speaker 1: a few weeks ago, and I still do it periodically now.

591
00:37:57,040 --> 00:37:59,560
Speaker 1: Because I have two whiteboards in my office, I will

592
00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:01,840
Speaker 1: often get up. I'm left handed, I'll get up and

593
00:38:01,840 --> 00:38:04,799
Speaker 1: I'll write the alphabet in my right hand. And the

594
00:38:04,840 --> 00:38:06,439
Speaker 1: way that I could do it a month ago, which

595
00:38:06,440 --> 00:38:09,359
Speaker 1: looked like dogshit, now it almost looks like, oh, that's

596
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:13,399
Speaker 1: just my writing my good hand and my bad hand.

597
00:38:13,440 --> 00:38:16,560
Speaker 1: For one of better terms, the gap is, you know,

598
00:38:16,600 --> 00:38:19,320
Speaker 1: speaking of the U gap, the gap has drastically reduced.

599
00:38:19,920 --> 00:38:22,399
Speaker 1: Like if one of my goals, for example, was how

600
00:38:22,400 --> 00:38:24,600
Speaker 1: do I write with my left hand? And also what

601
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:27,080
Speaker 1: are the benefits? But how do I write with my

602
00:38:27,239 --> 00:38:29,560
Speaker 1: right hand? We'll crag. You just write with your right hand.

603
00:38:29,560 --> 00:38:31,880
Speaker 1: It would look fucking terrible, And then you do it

604
00:38:31,920 --> 00:38:34,640
Speaker 1: again and again and the next day then it will look

605
00:38:34,719 --> 00:38:37,600
Speaker 1: less terrible. Instead of being ten out of ten fucking horrible,

606
00:38:37,640 --> 00:38:40,960
Speaker 1: it'll be a seven. Then eventually it'd be like neat

607
00:38:41,000 --> 00:38:45,120
Speaker 1: writing so people won't people won't know. People wouldn't know

608
00:38:45,239 --> 00:38:50,920
Speaker 1: because I've done the work to create the neurological gains

609
00:38:51,120 --> 00:38:53,440
Speaker 1: between what I want to do and then what my

610
00:38:53,600 --> 00:38:56,880
Speaker 1: body is capable of doing, down to the fine motor

611
00:38:56,920 --> 00:38:59,600
Speaker 1: skills of holding the pen between my thumb and index

612
00:38:59,640 --> 00:39:04,360
Speaker 1: finger and then producing that completely different look of writing

613
00:39:05,280 --> 00:39:10,960
Speaker 1: the same guy at sixty two practicing something and literally

614
00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:15,120
Speaker 1: creating new and different neural pathways in my brain to

615
00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:18,279
Speaker 1: be able to operationalize this thing of writing with my

616
00:39:18,440 --> 00:39:23,000
Speaker 1: wrong hand. Well, there are so many fucking things that

617
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:25,680
Speaker 1: you and I can do that are going to upgrade

618
00:39:25,680 --> 00:39:30,680
Speaker 1: your brain, things that people do not think about. I

619
00:39:30,760 --> 00:39:33,600
Speaker 1: might do a whole episode on that right team. I

620
00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:38,400
Speaker 1: may abhored you, I apologize for my stumbles mumbles here

621
00:39:38,400 --> 00:39:42,120
Speaker 1: and there, but I want you to listen to the

622
00:39:42,160 --> 00:39:45,800
Speaker 1: whole podcast with your index finger shoved in your idea

623
00:39:46,440 --> 00:39:49,200
Speaker 1: and you can empathize with me. See Team