Speaker 1: Welcome to the Chrizzy Cast. I've spun the wheel and
Speaker 1: it's come up the category of pals and it really
Speaker 1: could have spun up any category from radio host, comedian,
Speaker 1: TV presenter, all round overachiever style Maven. You know it's borderline,
Speaker 1: just like on a wheel of fortune. And we welcome
Speaker 1: to the Crizzy Cast. The great Tim Rosso Ross.
Speaker 2: Thank you very much, so good to see you. Looking
Speaker 2: for fabulous am I.
Speaker 1: I've had a year, Rosso.
Speaker 2: Do you want to talk about that now?
Speaker 1: No, we'll talk about that, okay over a coffee.
Speaker 2: Okay. I'm sure everyone would rather hear about your year
Speaker 2: than what I've got to talk about.
Speaker 1: I'm going to spin the wheel again, Rosso.
Speaker 2: Okay, good, I love a wheel.
Speaker 1: And well, look at that, my best year has come up.
Speaker 1: I can't wait. I was hoping it would come up
Speaker 1: for you. What Tim ROSSA Ross? Is your best year yet?
Speaker 2: I've had I've had a few. It's hard to decide.
Speaker 2: Can I do too?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 2: It's such a curious thing, isn't it to think about
Speaker 2: whole years and and how they affect you and what happened.
Speaker 2: But also without sounding like a wanker. Yeah, so oh
Speaker 2: well that was the year that I did this, or
Speaker 2: you know, the years that you have children's really important.
Speaker 2: But that goes without saying, yeah, they don't count. No,
Speaker 2: there was a woman I can't remember her name. She
Speaker 2: was one of those She was on one of those
Speaker 2: shows that were big Wisteria Lane.
Speaker 1: Oh god, I can see them all.
Speaker 2: She had blonde hair and she's married to William H. Macy.
Speaker 2: Everyone's bad.
Speaker 1: Oh god, what's her name?
Speaker 2: Anyway? She once I saw and.
Speaker 1: She got embroiled.
Speaker 2: She's in jail in that. Yeah, she's in jail because she.
Speaker 1: Was paying people off to get her kids into the university. Yeah.
Speaker 1: What's her name? Felicity?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, Felicity who was in Desperate Housewife, Desperate House
Speaker 2: Hands on the butter But I saw this interview with her.
Speaker 1: Pick a famous face.
Speaker 2: I loved the famous face lived.
Speaker 1: Around on Sale of the Century.
Speaker 2: Ill take the home, viewer, please.
Speaker 1: I would never have taken the home.
Speaker 2: Why would you? Why you know there's someone from Charlie's
Speaker 2: Angels or Brett from Craigie Bird exactly. You know, take
Speaker 2: far and face at Majors every time.
Speaker 1: Cheryl Ladd for the Wind, she was on there a bit.
Speaker 2: God, it's just all coming back. I love a pick
Speaker 2: of the board. She once said, not Cheryl Ladd Felicity,
Speaker 2: that she felt like that everyone should when you talk
Speaker 2: about your greatest achievements, she should, you should talk about
Speaker 2: your children. Uh, And she said, well not for me,
Speaker 2: it's my career. I thought that was pretty brave.
Speaker 1: I do too, and I actually and I agree with it.
Speaker 1: I agree with it.
Speaker 2: I think when she said it right, which was maybe
Speaker 2: twelve years ago, maybe fifteen years ago, I think it
Speaker 2: was controversial. I think today everyone would go, yeah, it
Speaker 2: makes sense.
Speaker 1: I've got in trouble for SAE.
Speaker 2: For not loving your children enough.
Speaker 1: Well, this is the thing. I love them so much.
Speaker 2: But it goes without saying, doesn't it.
Speaker 1: Yes, But I also feel like I love them in
Speaker 1: a way that no one else loves their children. But
Speaker 1: I know that everybody feels that way.
Speaker 2: But that's the secret source.
Speaker 1: And I don't talk about them much because every day
Speaker 1: millions of women give birth to a baby. It's like
Speaker 1: the most common thing that happens. So I don't think
Speaker 1: I can add anything to that. And I was in
Speaker 1: I don't like doing you know, like you know, I
Speaker 1: don't even know what you call them. But there's people
Speaker 1: with seance. Yeah, group massacre. No, I you know, you
Speaker 1: sit in front of a group of market researchs other
Speaker 1: women barbecue talk with a microphone. What is that called
Speaker 1: or something? Keynote speaking. I don't do it, but I
Speaker 1: was forced to anyway. I was answering a question about
Speaker 1: that vibe and Buttress was on there, and she waited
Speaker 1: until I finished, and then in front of everybody, she said, well,
Speaker 1: can I just disagree with you? And you know, children
Speaker 1: are I don't know. She made me sound like witch.
Speaker 1: You know, she made me sound all and it's hard,
Speaker 1: like I was keeping them in a cage and putting
Speaker 1: a bone in there, you know what I mean. Yuck.
Speaker 2: Well, that's not what I meant. I don't want to
Speaker 2: say anything about Ida, but everyone has their own journey
Speaker 2: with and she was probably not around for her kids
Speaker 2: as much she would have liked to in a time
Speaker 2: that didn't understand that exactly. My mother was very fond
Speaker 2: of her. She subscribed to her Item magazine. Yes, was
Speaker 2: an event once right and we went out. Can I
Speaker 2: tell you this story? Yes?
Speaker 1: So used to it when you talk about your mom,
Speaker 1: which was awesome.
Speaker 2: Take a mom out of the situation. For two seconds.
Speaker 2: So we go to one of these lunches we used
Speaker 2: to have back in the day, whole bunch of Sydney
Speaker 2: radio people and you know, red meat men, Mad lunch
Speaker 2: we used to call you. And so ben Fordham's there
Speaker 2: and we've had a lot to drink.
Speaker 1: And were you in radio when it was like that?
Speaker 2: What? Not as good as when it was like that?
Speaker 2: Just after? Was good? But it wasn't good.
Speaker 1: But it wasn't. It wasn't Doug mulray level.
Speaker 2: That was It wasn't wasn't Ferrari level. And so ben
Speaker 2: Fordham's sister is an artist and there's and there's an
Speaker 2: exhibition going on and it opens at five o'clock on
Speaker 2: a Friday afternoon, and we are and we all turn
Speaker 2: up like like it's like a hurricane of drunk people,
Speaker 2: you know, classic mid two thousands. I'm wearing thongs, some
Speaker 2: flat jeans, you know, like looking like Bloody from the Goodies.
Speaker 2: And somewhere along the line we pick up our bulldog
Speaker 2: who's not in the show business at all. He comes along.
Speaker 2: What a great nickname, and so we're like Joey John's
Speaker 2: the famous rugby league player well known for like and everything.
Speaker 2: Even he looked at us and went, oh, you guys
Speaker 2: are a bit over.
Speaker 1: The you know, have you read a gallery a gallery opening?
Speaker 2: And just so it is there, I'm having a chat.
Speaker 2: This sounds like I'm having a chat to Ida. And
Speaker 2: I introduced Ida to Bulldog. I sort of know Eida
Speaker 2: because I was at a Foxtale event once and told
Speaker 2: her that my mum really liked her. And she said
Speaker 2: to me, she said, will you tell your mum that
Speaker 2: I said hello, which is like the most beautiful thing
Speaker 2: you could say. And so I introduced I'm introducing Ida
Speaker 2: to Bulldog. They're chatting up a storm. Everything gets a
Speaker 2: little bit hazy there. You know, you meet a whole
Speaker 2: bunch of people in subsequent years, going I met you
Speaker 2: at that gallery thing, I fort him. Fast forward to
Speaker 2: two days later. I actually American, and I ended up
Speaker 2: sending flowers to Ben's sisters apologize for being so drunk
Speaker 2: at her opening. But the one thing that I do
Speaker 2: remember was Michael Bulldog being out the front eider leaving,
Speaker 2: getting into a limousine and her winding down the window
Speaker 2: and waving out see her later. Bulldog. Anyway, what were
Speaker 2: we talking about? He is a cracker, amazing, amazing, amazing.
Speaker 1: We were talking about your best year.
Speaker 2: So yeah. So it's a very roundabout way using the
Speaker 2: weave to say that. It goes without saying that children
Speaker 2: are the most important year and your marriage is fantastic
Speaker 2: and all that sort of stuff. But I like the
Speaker 2: idea of transitional years or years that speak outside of
Speaker 2: your own being. So then there's something happening in the
Speaker 2: zeitgeist that creates opportunities that sometimes we don't look at.
Speaker 2: So would would you like me to go to the
Speaker 2: eighties or the mid two mid to late two thousand
Speaker 2: slas you go.
Speaker 1: To the eighties any day of the week, I choes eighties.
Speaker 2: So nineteen eighty seven, Oh god, I'm seventeen. Yes, and
Speaker 2: this I thought that this was going to be how
Speaker 2: my life was for the rest of it. Have you
Speaker 2: finished school? No, So it was like year eleven going
Speaker 2: into your twelve. This girlfriend, she's got an amazing house
Speaker 2: near the beach. Her parents are at work every day.
Speaker 2: We're just hanging out by the pool, and I've got
Speaker 2: a pair of mambo shorts blue and white.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 2: There's a lot of refoil going around.
Speaker 1: Was there? Oakley T shirt?
Speaker 2: Yeah? All, there's frog skins, there's everything going on. There's
Speaker 2: music playing, there's people around, we're drinking their mum's white wine.
Speaker 2: It's all that stuff going on. And then at night
Speaker 2: I had these pair of black paintent shoes that I
Speaker 2: used to wear with a pair of shorts to like
Speaker 2: the nightclubs. When we get into the nightclubs, we used
Speaker 2: to go to Inflation and Tunnel and all that sort
Speaker 2: of stuff. And Tunnel was this nightclub and we worked
Speaker 2: out how you that you could jump over, like through
Speaker 2: this lane into their car park and going through the
Speaker 2: toilet brilliant, so we could get so we were just
Speaker 2: smuggling everyone into it.
Speaker 1: I would have never been brave enough to do that.
Speaker 1: I was scaredy. Yeah, it's take a lot more risks now.
Speaker 2: I think I didn't look I didn't look eighteen at seventeen,
Speaker 2: I think O my brother's idea or something like that.
Speaker 2: So it was like you could get in for free.
Speaker 2: And also you weren't it wasn't you still.
Speaker 1: Look very young. I was surprised because you know when
Speaker 1: someone drank you about when they're finishing school.
Speaker 2: You thought I was class of ninety nine, well, class
Speaker 2: of eighty eight.
Speaker 1: I thought you were much younger than me, and I
Speaker 1: finished in ninety one.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, I'm the big fifty four. I know. Wow, amazing,
Speaker 2: isn't it.
Speaker 1: It is amazing.
Speaker 2: I was, but Me's is much younger than me. MEM's
Speaker 2: is like fifty maybe it's fifty one this year or something.
Speaker 2: And so yeah, I was like, and I would sit
Speaker 2: at the older end of the comics around at the time, right,
Speaker 2: so I'm older than well, you don't look I'm older
Speaker 2: than hughsy and Rove and Will and all that, because
Speaker 2: then we're all older than Hughesy. I don't know, I
Speaker 2: never maybe I don't know. Oh, I don't know. You'd
Speaker 2: have we'd have to google his things. But anyway, so
Speaker 2: nineteen eighty seven and I just loved it. And a
Speaker 2: friend of mine years later was talking about how we
Speaker 2: were there and it was really our last summer before
Speaker 2: we'd finished school. Andyone thinks about the last summer being
Speaker 2: the year after you finished school. Yeah, but after everyone finishes,
Speaker 2: everyone just saw it really disappeared, and then they're all
Speaker 2: gone and you never see them again. But that year
Speaker 2: of nineteen eighty seven, where you're sort of old enough
Speaker 2: to have all these experiences, but you're about to embark
Speaker 2: on year twelve. Yeah, and then you know, these pretty
Speaker 2: girls around me and my mate and you know, tanning
Speaker 2: it up, hanging around the pool like them and Endias twins,
Speaker 2: you know, like the brothers. You know, it's like it's
Speaker 2: just one of you, Eric, I'm the one with their
Speaker 2: hair for what they are. But there was just I
Speaker 2: felt like this was it. This was like yeah, and
Speaker 2: then I ended up I'm dating one of them, and
Speaker 2: then that doesn't work out, and then I'm dating another
Speaker 2: one of the same girls in the friendship groups and
Speaker 2: there's no animosity going on. Like I was just like
Speaker 2: this is amazing, and you know, parents just you know,
Speaker 2: happy just to leave us at the house, don't care
Speaker 2: that the wolf blast is gone.
Speaker 1: The agent see it at all.
Speaker 2: If you go and going to the beach, staying in
Speaker 2: the city. And then when you're at a nightclub when
Speaker 2: you're seventeen, you find you always find out because you're
Speaker 2: with adults, so you always find other seventeen eighteen year
Speaker 2: olds there. And then there's another girlfriend that you meet
Speaker 2: from somewhere weird and yeah, just these random and then
Speaker 2: this idea, which I think is more important. Is this
Speaker 2: idea that you could meet people in those days and
Speaker 2: then you'd leave it up to chance to see whether
Speaker 2: you'd ever see them again. Yes, And that we had
Speaker 2: no without social media, You've got no no, there's no vehicle,
Speaker 2: there's nothing, there's no where to hold those friendships.
Speaker 1: There was not even any mobile phone, so you wouldn't.
Speaker 2: You would very rarely bother to get anyone's phone number
Speaker 2: unless you really wanted to date them or something like it.
Speaker 2: That even then you'd just go, there's a good chance
Speaker 2: I will see them again at one of these venues. Yeah,
Speaker 2: And like you weren't fussed about it and you just
Speaker 2: trusted in that.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: And then so you'd go a year later. You might
Speaker 2: be we'd go to Lawn or something for New Year's Eve,
Speaker 2: and then the next year we'd go to Byron Bay
Speaker 2: and the same people would always be at these places.
Speaker 2: You go, that's you from a year ago. Then you
Speaker 2: drink for a week with them, and then they were
Speaker 2: just gone forever.
Speaker 1: I've forgotten.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Interesting, So there that I think, and then I
Speaker 2: just you know, you get into year twelve and then
Speaker 2: it all sort of changed, and then you've got to
Speaker 2: you've got to be a bit more adult. Where you're
Speaker 2: on the casp, you're seventeen. You sort of you're sort
Speaker 2: of getting everything done for you, boozy, You're going to
Speaker 2: have some of the good times. Yeah, you said that
Speaker 2: at that time, you thought that this was it, this
Speaker 2: was your life. Now you've achieved seventeen years and there,
Speaker 2: and that I was going to spend my whole life
Speaker 2: around in people's pools, and that was pretty girls.
Speaker 1: Clean living on the set of Puberty.
Speaker 2: Blue Blues with you know, a lot of a lot
Speaker 2: of refoil being if put on people's bodies.
Speaker 1: I love refoil. Still. You can get a black market
Speaker 1: in Bali. If you could go back and whisper something
Speaker 1: in young Tim's ear, what would it be? It doesn't last.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't. I wouldn't give myself any hits on anything.
Speaker 2: I mean, I think it's I only have one regret
Speaker 2: in life, and it's the weirdest regret of all the time.
Speaker 2: I regret that when I was in a band, and
Speaker 2: I was much younger, when we used to hire pas
Speaker 2: in terms of you know, public address systems, you don't
Speaker 2: have the bands to play out of that. We didn't
Speaker 2: buy one because I rented so many over the years.
Speaker 2: I should have bought a PA years and years ago.
Speaker 2: I bought one when I was I don't know, thirty
Speaker 2: nine or forty or something. It's like, why why have
Speaker 2: I been hiring these for years? Having one of them?
Speaker 2: So easy?
Speaker 1: Kids party and they're not that expensive.
Speaker 2: No, not now, they were expensive then, but even then,
Speaker 2: we should have invested in one.
Speaker 1: What did you pay for your PA? Because I've got
Speaker 1: one too, because I like to sing as a.
Speaker 2: Real The one that I've had for ten years was
Speaker 2: eight hundred dollars.
Speaker 1: Mine was two eighty nine.
Speaker 2: I'll send you a link mine professional professional one. Mine isn't.
Speaker 1: I've got one in the kitchen and then one in
Speaker 1: my bedroom so that I can if I want to
Speaker 1: sing upstairs, I can do it because if I have
Speaker 1: to walk all the way downstairs and.
Speaker 2: Finds you do play a long music a lot to it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like just in the background and then you
Speaker 1: if I'm listening, like at the moment, do you hyper
Speaker 1: fixate on songs or things?
Speaker 2: Know? Any crazy people do that?
Speaker 1: Of course you definitely do. I'm hyper fixated at the
Speaker 1: moment for some reason. On the Doobie Brothers, what a
Speaker 1: full belief.
Speaker 2: Great song it.
Speaker 1: I think it is the perfect song. And obviously I've
Speaker 1: known it for years decades, but just recently it's like
Speaker 1: it fits my vibes, it fits my She.
Speaker 2: Came from soup where about you? Long ago? It's center
Speaker 2: man of food.
Speaker 1: And then sometimes what you do re create yet to
Speaker 1: be created.
Speaker 2: You know it? Yeah?
Speaker 1: And no, no, I just have to get the microphone.
Speaker 1: She musts are smart. Why here's nostalgic tale. It's it's magical.
Speaker 1: Listen to it within the next twenty four hours, you know.
Speaker 2: Strangely enough, tonight I'll be doing a show and we
Speaker 2: do this yacht rock medley and there's a little bit
Speaker 2: of that you're joking. Yeah, And my favorite bit is
Speaker 2: that we do a bit of Christopher Cross ride like
Speaker 2: the wind Break song Tell you what?
Speaker 1: That is not my favorite Christopher Cross though.
Speaker 2: Theme from Arthur. Yeah, yeah, it's much better.
Speaker 1: So do you know who wrote that?
Speaker 2: Dudley Moore?
Speaker 1: Peter Allen? Oh?
Speaker 2: Did he good songwriter?
Speaker 1: And when you hear it again, you're like, oh, obviously
Speaker 1: it's Peter Allen. You can hear it. You can hear
Speaker 1: his DNA in it. I want to talk about cars,
Speaker 1: rosso hang on. Let me sorry, Christopher cross Story, Oh yeah, yes,
Speaker 1: just right like the wind.
Speaker 2: So best mate it. When I do the show with
Speaker 2: he's great singer and he's singing, you know, the ride
Speaker 2: like the wind, such a long way to go. And
Speaker 2: while he's singing that.
Speaker 1: Good to the bottom mexicle.
Speaker 2: And Wred, you sing no, So it's the light like
Speaker 2: the wind, and I've got my back. I'm doing this
Speaker 2: like I'm running, like I'm running like the wind. And
Speaker 2: when we first started doing it, I'm ridiculous because I'm
Speaker 2: standing to my back to the microphone to show how
Speaker 2: it works on and I had a frog puppet. What yeah,
Speaker 2: and so it's I got such a long way to go.
Speaker 2: And then with the frog puppet, I would go into
Speaker 2: the micro no where to go with the puppet.
Speaker 1: It was the frog puppet was the echo.
Speaker 2: Yeah it was that was doing the big that Michael
Speaker 2: what's his name's backing vocals. Then I lost the puppet.
Speaker 2: No one really liked it. So now I just just
Speaker 2: turn around and sing it was it worth the payoff?
Speaker 2: Not really?
Speaker 1: Well it is because initially when you mentioned the yacht
Speaker 1: rock medley, I thought it was like, you know, g
Speaker 1: up music that that acts played before.
Speaker 2: They get and we do that.
Speaker 1: I didn't realize that you were performing the rock at Medley.
Speaker 1: What else is in it? Yacht rock is my favorite.
Speaker 2: Starts with Hall and Oates, which one. God, I can't
Speaker 2: it's in my head, but I can't remember.
Speaker 1: It's probably my dreams come true.
Speaker 2: No, anyway, I don't. I but we finish with America
Speaker 2: Magic right, Oh god, great song, great song. So we're
Speaker 2: doing it. I got this friend Jerry Beckley right, who
Speaker 2: messaged me through Instagram.
Speaker 1: Jerry Beckley sounds like, you know, a rock star from the.
Speaker 2: Fifties or sixties, late sixties, seventies and tomorrow.
Speaker 1: He's the guitarist.
Speaker 2: He's the guitarist in the band America.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I've got goosebump.
Speaker 2: So Jerry's married to a woman in Sydney. What yeah,
Speaker 2: that they met in London? All right, Jerry likes architecture.
Speaker 2: I like architecture.
Speaker 1: I've got full goosebub Yeah.
Speaker 2: So I get a direct message from this guy Jerry
Speaker 2: one day. I'm keay Tim, I'm coming to your show
Speaker 2: on Tuesday night. Be great to hang afterwards and meat.
Speaker 2: I'm like, god this, Yeah, it's a bit of a
Speaker 2: random thing, like clearly Instagram dms don't have an American accent,
Speaker 2: ha ha. But but suddenly it's worked out. I googled
Speaker 2: this guy's it's Jerry from America anyway, so it comes along.
Speaker 2: It's the nicest guy, super handsome, loveliest guy. He's got
Speaker 2: all the stories and like he just wants to catch
Speaker 2: up and have coffees and stuff and talk about architecture
Speaker 2: and are you.
Speaker 1: Just looking at his face which is right in front
Speaker 1: of his brain that knows so much about music and
Speaker 1: everyone life, and he has a story about everyone that
Speaker 1: we weren't even we were even alive when he was living.
Speaker 2: Like he was young for that time. He was like
Speaker 2: eighteen or seventeen in the late ninety sixtyes, so he's
Speaker 2: only in his seventies, so he's not like as old
Speaker 2: as the other guys, and he will great for his age.
Speaker 2: So he comes to shows.
Speaker 1: Now, Oh my god, I can't believe this.
Speaker 2: So I invite him to the Motel show and then
Speaker 2: I forget and he sings, magic didn't write it, but sings.
Speaker 2: I forgot. We were doing it.
Speaker 1: Sing a little bit before me can do Madew.
Speaker 2: He didn't do anything the jes magic and you know
Speaker 2: you're the one about the fire magic.
Speaker 1: No, no, you skipped the good bit. You know, don
Speaker 1: where when you guessed your spell.
Speaker 2: That's the magic.
Speaker 1: He's actually magic.
Speaker 2: And then he's in the audience and has to watch
Speaker 2: us do that.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. You know, this is the great thing
Speaker 1: about having a podcast like this is because that is
Speaker 1: deeply interesting to me. And I was offered an interview
Speaker 1: with somebody that literally everyone would reject, and I nearly
Speaker 1: broke my fingers to say yes, please, don't.
Speaker 2: Wanta Steving from the love Boat.
Speaker 1: Meryl Meryl Steving. No, it wasn't. I think he's passed away.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I did him him good? Who was it?
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say, Graham Gould. You wouldn't know him. But
Speaker 1: do you know this like walking in the ring that's
Speaker 1: the snow and there's nowhere to go, and you feel
Speaker 1: like a body of you is dying.
Speaker 2: That's in medly as well.
Speaker 1: CC.
Speaker 2: He wrote that he wrote a lot hit get him in.
Speaker 1: For like a thirty second podcast. It just says fucking
Speaker 1: thank you, and just.
Speaker 2: Ask him, Jerry will do your podcast. I'm going to
Speaker 2: I've written him our introdution to Jerry you'll love him.
Speaker 2: My God, you're for the rest of your life. You'll
Speaker 2: say to me, you know, that was really great. Jerry
Speaker 2: was the nicest guy I've ever met. And guy's handsome
Speaker 2: and dress as well. He's so charmed.
Speaker 1: That's what I say about you. Oh, I can't say
Speaker 1: that about Jerry.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you will. There's plenty of plenty to go around.
Speaker 1: I want to move on to cars. You have a podcast,
Speaker 1: Cars That Made Australia Australia. I just love how you
Speaker 1: know so much about very specific things. That's what I
Speaker 1: love about.
Speaker 2: A little bit about a lot of random stuff.
Speaker 1: Amazing. And you've said that cars can tell you a
Speaker 1: lot about someone's personality and aspirations. And I want you
Speaker 1: to give me a reading psychic style I drive. I
Speaker 1: can't wait for you to find out what I drive.
Speaker 1: You're going to be crepulsed.
Speaker 2: I'm not judging, far from the time some judging.
Speaker 1: You're going to be judging. Okay, A Rabo Toyota rav
Speaker 1: four hybrid, good car, white, hard to get, hard to
Speaker 1: get exactly, okay, hard to get. The only show I
Speaker 1: have what is white? Makes it like a higher car?
Speaker 2: Agreed, They're really hard to get it was all I
Speaker 2: could get though, And well you're lucky you go one.
Speaker 2: I bet you had to pull one of those shop
Speaker 2: is strings to get Like there are people who are
Speaker 2: on the waiting list for a RAB four for a
Speaker 2: model that hasn't even been undesigned, and great car.
Speaker 1: So I love it. Really, there's no judgment there, only
Speaker 1: than the color.
Speaker 2: It's like an ambulance.
Speaker 1: Do you know if I had, if I had a choice,
Speaker 1: what color, well I would have got there's a funny
Speaker 1: sort of putty gray green color.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I would get that. Yeah, we still
Speaker 2: could just have a bang, get it resprayed, but yeah,
Speaker 2: no judgment. What was your first car?
Speaker 1: My very first car was a Dahatsu Charade great basically
Speaker 1: a lawn mower. Yeah yeah, yeah, and I loved it.
Speaker 1: Me and my friends would pack into that two door.
Speaker 1: It was magic.
Speaker 2: They had all those things that those cars around the
Speaker 2: time when they would and they'd do the marketing decals
Speaker 2: and they had like a sports girl Barna.
Speaker 1: Yes, the sports girl. I wanted that, and they just laser. No,
Speaker 1: there was a laser to a sports girl.
Speaker 2: Laser. There was a god there's a Paddy to lend
Speaker 2: his colors and Patty Laser.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, is so glassy.
Speaker 2: And then we know what happened. They just said that
Speaker 2: have all these leftover cars and they go, God, we've
Speaker 2: got all these buriners lying around. What are we going
Speaker 2: to deal with them? He drives brainers. Oh girls, Well
Speaker 2: we've got a young girls. They like sports girls. They
Speaker 2: got you know, those bags, they sports girl bags. Let's
Speaker 2: make a sports girl bag that people can drive around. You.
Speaker 1: God, I love marketing and I ate all yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I remember there was a girl at school. She was
Speaker 1: the year above me, and you know, and it's what
Speaker 1: was that Amanda stool st yu Eli And she was
Speaker 1: a year above me, but she was old so that yeah,
Speaker 1: she turned eighteen in maybe February or my yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: She would drive to school every single day and I
Speaker 1: would just.
Speaker 2: Watch well and in the sports Girl Barina.
Speaker 1: In a black sports girl Barna yeah, yeah, yeah, brand new.
Speaker 2: She's she's she's one gear shift away from dating the
Speaker 2: PA teacher.
Speaker 1: I think it was a science teacher. I want to
Speaker 1: talk about your childhood, and I want to know how
Speaker 1: your birth order affected.
Speaker 2: Tim Simon, you are Yeah, that's a really very good
Speaker 2: and interesting question because something I think about quite a lot,
Speaker 2: so do I. So I'm the youngest, so am I.
Speaker 1: But by a lot. There's a there's a gap between
Speaker 1: me and my sisters. How ten eight.
Speaker 2: That's my dad was like, No, so not so much.
Speaker 2: I'm like a oldest brother four years. The other one's
Speaker 2: really eighteen months, but it's really two years in school year,
Speaker 2: So not huge, no, But you know, I still have
Speaker 2: to sort of yell a bit to be heard, which
Speaker 2: is really interesting. So when you're having discussions about stuff,
Speaker 2: you got to like, actually, you know, I'm here, I'm
Speaker 2: going to have a view on this. And I do
Speaker 2: not blame them at all because they brothered me my
Speaker 2: whole life. And I was little and they looked after
Speaker 2: me and that's what they did. And I were the
Speaker 2: most beautiful big brothers. And they're much taller than me
Speaker 2: as well, like you know, proper men.
Speaker 1: Do they look like you?
Speaker 2: Uh not really? Oh, Campbell the middle brother looks more
Speaker 2: like me now than probably ever before, as our faces
Speaker 2: have changed over time. But they you know, my Campbell
Speaker 2: the middle brother, he saved me when I almost drowned
Speaker 2: when we were canoeing when I would have been thirteen
Speaker 2: or fourteen or something just held the canoe and held
Speaker 2: me like a big man, giant. My brother, oldest brother, Steve.
Speaker 2: When I watched the family dog get run over, I
Speaker 2: was with my mates and sh and I watched it
Speaker 2: go underneath the car and I went back to the house,
Speaker 2: and you know, he held me when I just sobbed
Speaker 2: into his arms. And then I sobbed into his arms.
Speaker 2: After my grandmother died as well, and it was I
Speaker 2: was an adult then, but it was a beautiful bookends
Speaker 2: of you. I like it the to have a bigit
Speaker 2: that was established to have a big brother, but to
Speaker 2: have a physically big brother I just love because I'm
Speaker 2: a little man. But they but more generally, which has
Speaker 2: nothing to do with them, is because the best way
Speaker 2: of putting it is right, there are three people in
Speaker 2: a boys in a family, and there's a totem tennis set.
Speaker 2: There's only two rackets. I guess who doesn't get to play.
Speaker 1: You absolutely do not get a go, and did I.
Speaker 2: And they give you a go, But you never get
Speaker 2: to the point that you can be competitive because it's
Speaker 2: too busy, so you sort of you get pushed to
Speaker 2: the side. So that's what's made me quite a strange person,
Speaker 2: to be honest. So my interests were weird. While my
Speaker 2: brothers were having to do things like that we're playing
Speaker 2: to playing totem tennis, I would be inside with my
Speaker 2: little playmer biles and all this stuff and making dioramas
Speaker 2: of Cold Creek.
Speaker 1: And stuff like.
Speaker 2: I was obsessed with the oldie colonial times and all
Speaker 2: sorts of things and yeah, god, yeah.
Speaker 1: So I was telling a friend yesterday.
Speaker 2: Take me to Sovereign Hill when I'm ten. I'm the
Speaker 2: happiest person in the wood.
Speaker 1: Literally twenty four hours ago, I sit, I'm having some
Speaker 1: friends over for lunch on Saturday, and I've been very
Speaker 1: isolated for you, I haven't seen anybody. And last night
Speaker 1: I was setting the table two days ahead, just to
Speaker 1: see if I could do it, if I could remember
Speaker 1: how to set a table, how to have people. Yeah. Yeah, Anyway,
Speaker 1: I took a photo of it and I sent it
Speaker 1: to a friend and he was like, yeah, you just
Speaker 1: set the table. I said, no, I'm really proud of
Speaker 1: myself because it looks like, you know, I had I'd
Speaker 1: made little flower posies and beautiful little crystal cups, and
Speaker 1: it's just it looked so beautiful. I was so proud
Speaker 1: of myself, And I said, IM proud of myself because
Speaker 1: it looks like it did in my mind. And I said,
Speaker 1: and I'm used to. You know, in grade six, they
Speaker 1: give you an assignment and I literally said the words
Speaker 1: build a diorama of old colonial times, and then I
Speaker 1: would get on fire with it. I'm like, yes, I'm
Speaker 1: going to make little wagon wheels and cobblestone streets and
Speaker 1: there's going to be someone in mid mid throw of
Speaker 1: the of the toilet bowl out there, and then I
Speaker 1: would make it and it would look so shit.
Speaker 2: Yeah mine was shit. Yeah shit. And there's a deep
Speaker 2: disappointment as a child because you can't make things as
Speaker 2: much as good as you'd like them to be. Yes,
Speaker 2: And that crushes us a little bit.
Speaker 1: And that ruined me my whole life, that colonial thing.
Speaker 1: And that's why I'm always surprised when I can do
Speaker 1: something literally from that assignment.
Speaker 2: Let's just point out here that colonialism had it a
Speaker 2: much more significant effect on a lot more other people
Speaker 2: than you.
Speaker 1: Yes, but did Sovereign Hill. Sovereign Hill is my favorite
Speaker 1: place I haven't.
Speaker 2: Been for years. We went, we did that thing at school.
Speaker 2: So for those of we should say for those of
Speaker 2: you who can't be googling, it's it's an old time,
Speaker 2: you know, theme park where you go along and you
Speaker 2: can they pan for gold, and it looks like it's
Speaker 2: an eight and fifties mining.
Speaker 1: Village, but it is a whole village with streets and
Speaker 1: areas and precincts. There's now a little Chinese area for
Speaker 1: when the Chinese settlers came to. Honestly, it is my favorite.
Speaker 1: We went a favorite thing.
Speaker 2: We went out for the school camp where you went
Speaker 2: to school there where you dress up and so the
Speaker 2: tourists come along. Never did that and then they see
Speaker 2: you dressed up with the little cap like you're in Oliver.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, Yeah, that was quite. That was quite
Speaker 2: the thing I've do. You know, can I ruin some magic?
Speaker 2: Kind of ruined some magic?
Speaker 1: A careful, it's my favorite place.
Speaker 2: So they panned for gold. So they go down there
Speaker 2: and show you how to pan for gold and so
Speaker 2: then you can be higher the panning pan. And the
Speaker 2: guy goes, this is how you do it, but he
Speaker 2: brings a pan that's already got dirt with gold in it,
Speaker 2: and he goes that this is how you do it,
Speaker 2: and he pans it, and then he goes, oh, look
Speaker 2: there's a speck of gold, and there must be gold
Speaker 2: in here, but it was he came preloaded with gold.
Speaker 1: What's crueler that lie or Santa. I felt very uncomfortable
Speaker 1: lying about Santa to my kids. I couldn't wait for
Speaker 1: them to work it out. I never ever lie to
Speaker 1: them about anything, and I couldn't even look them in
Speaker 1: the eye.
Speaker 2: I didn't. I found it all a bit weird because
Speaker 2: we grew up without Santa. How why I think it's
Speaker 2: just a Christian thing.
Speaker 1: I don't.
Speaker 2: I really don't know. I just so I never win,
Speaker 2: always got presents, but we never got presents from Santa.
Speaker 1: So I've never heard that before. Very unusual.
Speaker 2: My sister in law has never been to Bunnings. What, Yeah,
Speaker 2: you could go to the phones on this one, wouldn't you.
Speaker 2: In normal she's meant to office work, though she's been
Speaker 2: a office week's beever, she's not interested. Lives in an apartment,
Speaker 2: but no, I don't. I don't.
Speaker 1: It's plenty of stuff at Bunnings for an apartment.
Speaker 2: But I know she's just not interested. But I I
Speaker 2: remember vividly being a young kid trying to work out it,
Speaker 2: saying mum, or how would if he did come, how
Speaker 2: would he get through that? And how could he?
Speaker 1: Was she quite pragmatic. She's like, yeah, no he doesn't
Speaker 1: because he doesn't exist, or she question.
Speaker 2: I don't think they tried to say that he didn't exist.
Speaker 2: It just wasn't part of our lot.
Speaker 1: I've never heard that ever. Rosso everybody has Santa unless
Speaker 1: you're you know, a different relig Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know I'm having a record. I think about
Speaker 2: that now, but I know it's quite well.
Speaker 1: Were you any religion like Protestant, toil Methodists.
Speaker 2: Uniting Church? But I just don't. I don't. I never
Speaker 2: really asked, wow, because I mean it's just you know,
Speaker 2: like those things that it didn't worry me because I
Speaker 2: don't feel like.
Speaker 1: Santa is omnipresent from descend from late mid November, like
Speaker 1: didn't you want didn't you go? Who's that guy? And
Speaker 1: then you're too busy making a coloning.
Speaker 2: I just didn't. I just didn't even think about it.
Speaker 2: I was we love putting up the tree. I loved
Speaker 2: getting presents and then all that, all those things. I
Speaker 2: loved pulling out the tree and that one year and
Speaker 2: the little things that went around and those things have
Speaker 2: been handed down. There was, of course that was and
Speaker 2: then Maumauld pull out some you know, give us all
Speaker 2: the toilet bag. That's great. That's what every eight year
Speaker 2: old wants, very practical.
Speaker 1: It's just for your overnight business days. Let's talk about
Speaker 1: your book please. I did have a copy in I
Speaker 1: habage you did. I love receiving stuff from you, pleasure.
Speaker 1: I've got something else to talk about in terms of
Speaker 1: receiving stuff. But tell us about your book. It's called
Speaker 1: Beauty and it's a book of short stories. And I've
Speaker 1: got this mailing list and I write stories to it,
Speaker 1: and then I put some of them in a book
Speaker 1: and then wrote some new ones. You are one of
Speaker 1: the most. Like I'm a reader. Your work is so
Speaker 1: sublime to me.
Speaker 2: Thank you.
Speaker 1: I just feel like it's such because I'm on the
Speaker 1: mailing list and I'm going through shit feels no spam,
Speaker 1: and then I get this glittering email from Tim Ross
Speaker 1: and it's just a beautiful, tender, nostalgic, sentimental thing. It's
Speaker 1: just beautiful. You're such a good writer.
Speaker 2: Thank you. I like it. I like how it connects
Speaker 2: with people. I was doing an event last night and
Speaker 2: with my dear friend Bob Murphy. And Bob is very
Speaker 2: kind about my writing, and I think Bob writes beautifully
Speaker 2: as well. And yeah, he was great. He was a
Speaker 2: great football player, and there's a true gentleman. But I
Speaker 2: always joke that, you know, I'm probably his only friend
Speaker 2: who doesn't talk to him about footy. But we bonded
Speaker 2: a lot about writing because he wrote a really beautiful book.
Speaker 2: And I don't talk to many people about writing for
Speaker 2: whatever reason. I just, you know, occasionally I do, but
Speaker 2: some friends whatever. But it's so Bob, that was a
Speaker 2: really nice thing to talk about and crafting stories in
Speaker 2: a similar way and how you do it. But what
Speaker 2: I like is that how the experience connects us. This
Speaker 2: to write stories about when you're growing up at whether
Speaker 2: it's going to school or whatever, and they go, that
Speaker 2: could be my life. That was sort of like that,
Speaker 2: even though I lived a weird life without Santa haha.
Speaker 2: So no matter where you are in the country, these
Speaker 2: things connect us in different ways.
Speaker 1: The reason I love your writing is because I thought
Speaker 1: I was the only person that could recall in perfect
Speaker 1: detail the smell of my grand's carpet or the feel
Speaker 1: of the handle on her sugar bowl. And you you
Speaker 1: are also that person you right in terms of smells
Speaker 1: and feelings and colors, and I just identify so much
Speaker 1: with it. I understand everything you write.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's interesting. Maybe that is that when if you
Speaker 2: are going back to that idea of when you are
Speaker 2: the youngest, you're more observant because you left to your
Speaker 2: own devices a little bit more, so you have to
Speaker 2: I just scan everything. I still do, so do I
Speaker 2: I'm just like I don't, and I'm not sure everyone does.
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure they don't. I just remember it all, Yeah,
Speaker 2: remember all I remember. I just remember the most vivid things,
Speaker 2: like I met these people came to one of my
Speaker 2: shows recently and the daughters went. I went to school
Speaker 2: with them, and I remember the color of their cars,
Speaker 2: remember a haircut, everything, like remember the going to their house,
Speaker 2: how beautiful it was.
Speaker 1: And do people when you say, yeah, I remember you,
Speaker 1: I caught the tram with you in nineteen eighty one
Speaker 1: or something like that, they like, no. And you know,
Speaker 1: I can see that girl at you know, we're run
Speaker 1: into each other at minimax now as fifty year old,
Speaker 1: I can see her at six. I know that that's her.
Speaker 1: She looks exactly the same to me. And I can
Speaker 1: say where you lived, you had a quarry tall balcony. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you had a fern and a chandelier in your in
Speaker 1: your front yard and I thought it was amazing. You
Speaker 1: had a raw tron owl in them.
Speaker 2: And she's just like, did we Yeah? Some people weren't
Speaker 2: aware of That's like, but you lived there. Yeah, they
Speaker 2: wouldn't say it. Yeah, I've got a I know this
Speaker 2: woman and they've got this huge house and they've got
Speaker 2: a room that's the Christmas Room.
Speaker 1: What so what permanently.
Speaker 2: Full time dining table, lounge room, Christmas tree and they
Speaker 2: only use it on Christmas Day.
Speaker 1: And they never take the Christmas tree down.
Speaker 2: It's the Christmas Room. Isn't that amazing? I want to
Speaker 2: see it.
Speaker 1: I want to see it too.
Speaker 2: How many rooms does That's a huge house and like
Speaker 2: in the outer suburbs of Sydney, the Christmas Room, Christmas Room,
Speaker 2: It's like an amazing idea.
Speaker 1: Okay, if you had a house like that with just
Speaker 1: rooms willing Milly with nothing in them, what would your
Speaker 1: version of the Christmas Room be?
Speaker 2: The only room I would create and I wouldn't do
Speaker 2: it because I'd probably have some sort of museum, yes,
Speaker 2: like I'd have a museum of the things with things
Speaker 2: that I love displayed in a way that you could
Speaker 2: walk in and go. Actually, that would make me feel crazy. No,
Speaker 2: I don't. I don't. I don't need that space. I
Speaker 2: don't know. I like the idea of it makes me uncomfortable,
Speaker 2: Like I'd much rather have smaller spaces and less and yeah,
Speaker 2: I love the idea of someone else doing that. I
Speaker 2: love the magic of that. If you're a kid, that
Speaker 2: the only only time you would go into that room,
Speaker 2: you wouldn't even open the door.
Speaker 1: Imagine a playdate.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I like what's in that?
Speaker 1: Yeah, come in here.
Speaker 2: I don't have a look at the Christmas room. And
Speaker 2: the fact that you would just think that everyone when
Speaker 2: you're little, you don't have a Christmas room because everything
Speaker 2: in the center of your world is seems normal. Yeah,
Speaker 2: which is why we were all crazy, Because if you
Speaker 2: can't separate the fact that you don't people have se
Speaker 2: don't have a Christmas room. Because if you just think
Speaker 2: everyone should have a Christmas room because you have a
Speaker 2: Christmas room, that's what we're all man.
Speaker 1: I want to thank you for.
Speaker 2: Being my friend being thank you.
Speaker 1: Thank you for being friends.
Speaker 2: So can I ask you a question? Sure? So, over
Speaker 2: the years, I have noticed that you do enjoy singing,
Speaker 2: and you've got a reasonable voice.
Speaker 1: I enjoy singing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you sing more like I sing at home? Yeah,
Speaker 2: by one sing like karaoke.
Speaker 1: I don't drink anymore. Yeah, And I think that that
Speaker 1: I'm sort of four years into it now. Everybody, when
Speaker 1: I first gave up, they were like, oh, how do
Speaker 1: you you know? Have you noticed any difference? I'm like, no,
Speaker 1: not really, But now four years in, I have noticed
Speaker 1: that my ability to have fun has been affected.
Speaker 2: Yeah. You just don't feel like you need to do
Speaker 2: those things you use.
Speaker 1: My fun is. My fun is different, and it's you know,
Speaker 1: very insular and quiet.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And I don't know whether that's age or booze. I
Speaker 1: don't know.
Speaker 2: Well, the only what I would say is because I
Speaker 2: probably draw as parallels that you probably I wasn't as
Speaker 2: aware of as much of how much of an introvert
Speaker 2: I really was until I stop drinking. Yeah, me too,
Speaker 2: so and then which is hard. And someone said to
Speaker 2: me the other day, he goes, oh, I could have
Speaker 2: told you that twenty years ago. I said, I wasn't
Speaker 2: aware of that because I was drug all the time. No,
Speaker 2: because the question asked, let's go full circle. Would you
Speaker 2: come along one day when we do the motel immediately
Speaker 2: at the start and punch out the song with us as.
Speaker 1: A special guest. Yes, I would.
Speaker 2: That's a good answer, Yeah, I would.
Speaker 1: I feel very safe with you, even though I stumbled above,
Speaker 1: But I was worried because I'm very safe with you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because if you're like the idea of that makes me
Speaker 1: really nervous. Didn't want to do it, like you could
Speaker 1: do it now anytime now in the next fifteen years.
Speaker 1: But I think you'd really enjoy it. I think i too.
Speaker 1: You know that I've had a conversation with your best
Speaker 1: friend Kit whereabouts. I called him up because Kit is
Speaker 1: my ah yes, favorite name of all time, and I
Speaker 1: didn't have the guts to do it with my first
Speaker 1: child for some reason. I don't know you just and
Speaker 1: then after I had him, I was like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I am fiers. I will do whatever I fucking like.
Speaker 1: So when I was pregnant again with a boy, I
Speaker 1: was like, right here he is, this is Kit. But
Speaker 1: I just wanted to talk to a Kit that had
Speaker 1: been in the world, and just see if he liked
Speaker 1: his name, you know, if it had been a good
Speaker 1: name for him. So I called him and he said,
Speaker 1: I've loved it. I've loved it right from the get go.
Speaker 2: But kids turn into the names that they are. But yeah,
Speaker 2: and I think it's done him.
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, you're a very stylish man. I don't know
Speaker 1: where it comes from. You are impeccably groomed. You have
Speaker 1: extraordinary manners. It's like you're from another time, but very
Speaker 1: much today. I don't know how you do it. I've
Speaker 1: never met anybody like you. Every time you send me something,
Speaker 1: it's got a handwritten note, and every time I get it,
Speaker 1: I go, I've got to do that.
Speaker 2: That is that.
Speaker 1: I am so impressed by that, and I need to
Speaker 1: do that. And I've gone on to Vista Print. Oh
Speaker 1: and I have created a card with a sworn on
Speaker 1: one side and my name on the other. Oh and
Speaker 1: in a little envelope. It's not as stylish as yours,
Speaker 1: but the stylish ones cost a lot of money.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 1: And then at the checkout they said, would you like
Speaker 1: a sticker for the back of it, and I said yes,
Speaker 1: for free. So what I'm going to do. I won't
Speaker 1: take it off now, but I'm going to write you
Speaker 1: a note and I'm going to put it in the
Speaker 1: first one, and I want to thank you for encouraging
Speaker 1: me to do that, to be classy.
Speaker 2: Oh, people just like and it stays with you forever
Speaker 2: because you know, like we all get an email that
Speaker 2: says thank you very much for that. But I don't know.
Speaker 2: I think it's nice. I think, and sometimes I think
Speaker 2: you don't always say goodbye or thank you in the
Speaker 2: way you'd like to be case somemon drags you somewhere
Speaker 2: or you don't.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you've got to plane.
Speaker 2: There's a little bit of time to think about. Oh,
Speaker 2: that was really nice. And I do it sometimes when
Speaker 2: I write read a book that I really like from someone,
Speaker 2: I write them a letter and so I really like that,
Speaker 2: or Telly Show or something like that.
Speaker 1: Because it's a wonderful thing to do, and we just
Speaker 1: don't we just don't think of it anymore because we're
Speaker 1: all tap tap tapping.
Speaker 2: The problem with it is the older you get, when
Speaker 2: you do it, you do appear to be a little
Speaker 2: bit crazy. No, that's that weird guys writing things. No,
Speaker 2: not crazy.
Speaker 1: I can't believe it's a dollar fifty to send a
Speaker 1: standard of Like, that's what I can't believe. And also
Speaker 1: you look like Eddie Bedder. When did that happen? Do
Speaker 1: yep yep, Tim Ross, you thank you so much. Grab
Speaker 1: a copy of Rosso's magnificent book can Beauty Man, you
Speaker 1: can get do do?
Speaker 2: You can do anything?
Speaker 1: You magic?
Speaker 2: Thank you have the best no joke.
Speaker 1: And that was the magnificent and surprising Renaissance Man Rosso.
Speaker 1: Please try and get your hands on his new collection
Speaker 1: of short stories. It's titled Beauty b E W d Y.
Speaker 1: You can find it online at Modernist Books dot com.
Speaker 1: It's been a total pleasure and this episode is going
Speaker 1: straight to the poor room Beauty. Speaking of the poor room,
Speaker 1: you got to check out the batshit crazy bargains you
Speaker 1: can get your hands on at the quzzycas dot com. Garrisel,
Speaker 1: I'm adding new stuff all the time, like I can't
Speaker 1: stop now. So does the fresh stuff there get it