1 00:00:00,360 --> 00:00:01,160 Speaker 1: I'm got to agree with this. 2 00:00:01,200 --> 00:00:03,960 Speaker 2: Welcome to another installment of you project. It's Fatty Harps. 3 00:00:04,519 --> 00:00:07,760 Speaker 2: It's Monday morning at seven point thirty seven. I've had 4 00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:10,880 Speaker 2: my caffeine. I'm fucking good to go. I'm fired. Dr 5 00:00:10,960 --> 00:00:14,040 Speaker 2: Cam McDonald from the Shay Group, who is an old 6 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:17,400 Speaker 2: friend of the show and straight up smarty pants, joins me. 7 00:00:17,480 --> 00:00:19,279 Speaker 1: Hi, mate, how are you great? 8 00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:19,720 Speaker 3: Thanks Harp. 9 00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:20,919 Speaker 4: It's great to be back to man, it's been a 10 00:00:20,920 --> 00:00:23,160 Speaker 4: little while. It's lovely to see it. 11 00:00:23,160 --> 00:00:26,280 Speaker 1: It's been what do you do you reckon? It's been 12 00:00:26,320 --> 00:00:28,120 Speaker 1: a year or maybe more. 13 00:00:28,600 --> 00:00:31,440 Speaker 4: It could be it could be eight en months. I 14 00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:35,680 Speaker 4: think we were just starting. I think I just started 15 00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:38,800 Speaker 4: some of the pilot groups in the precision learning stuff 16 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:40,599 Speaker 4: that we were doing when I was talking about some 17 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:43,400 Speaker 4: learning differences between people last time. 18 00:00:43,440 --> 00:00:46,360 Speaker 2: I think now in the last eight ten months, we've 19 00:00:46,400 --> 00:00:50,120 Speaker 2: got a whole lot of new listeners and a more 20 00:00:50,200 --> 00:00:53,000 Speaker 2: expansive audience from all over the world and of course 21 00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:57,920 Speaker 2: primarily Australia. But tell everyone who you are and what 22 00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:00,480 Speaker 2: you do, and for those like some might have forgotten, 23 00:01:00,480 --> 00:01:01,600 Speaker 2: but some have never met you. 24 00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:03,520 Speaker 1: So give us the Cam story. 25 00:01:04,920 --> 00:01:12,160 Speaker 4: Yeah, so it started in Gunder Guy fast forward twelve years, 26 00:01:12,200 --> 00:01:12,959 Speaker 4: actually twenty years. 27 00:01:12,959 --> 00:01:16,440 Speaker 3: I'm in Sydney wanting to do a lot with sports. 28 00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:19,560 Speaker 4: Ended up doing exercise and Sports science because I thought 29 00:01:19,720 --> 00:01:21,440 Speaker 4: exercise and sports science is as close as I can 30 00:01:21,480 --> 00:01:24,160 Speaker 4: get to sports without being an the lead athlete. And 31 00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:28,800 Speaker 4: our third year had an incredible moment where an a 32 00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:32,600 Speaker 4: lecturer started telling me about how you can reverse diabetes 33 00:01:32,640 --> 00:01:35,360 Speaker 4: with exercise, and I just made this decision in my 34 00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:38,600 Speaker 4: mind that we needed to reverse diabetes immediately, and why 35 00:01:38,680 --> 00:01:40,240 Speaker 4: isn't everybody exercising all of the time. 36 00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:41,960 Speaker 3: This seems insane that we're not doing it. 37 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:48,160 Speaker 4: And in my last term of my last semester of 38 00:01:48,520 --> 00:01:53,040 Speaker 4: my four year degree x FIZZ, I found out about nutrients. 39 00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:57,440 Speaker 4: It had been fairly exercise focused, and I said, geez, 40 00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:59,560 Speaker 4: I think I should know a little bit more about nutrients. 41 00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:02,800 Speaker 4: So applied for a dietetics Masters and got in at 42 00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:08,200 Speaker 4: Griffith up at the Goldie that worked in hospital. Realized 43 00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:10,000 Speaker 4: that I don't want to support people who have had 44 00:02:10,040 --> 00:02:10,560 Speaker 4: a heart attack. 45 00:02:10,560 --> 00:02:11,400 Speaker 3: I want to prevent them. 46 00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:14,239 Speaker 4: So I did my PhD in prevention of chronic disease 47 00:02:14,320 --> 00:02:16,440 Speaker 4: in individuals that have been through breast cancer treatment. 48 00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:18,280 Speaker 3: So we're looking at a Mega three and exercise in that. 49 00:02:19,200 --> 00:02:23,080 Speaker 4: And then I was working in private practice realized that 50 00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:24,760 Speaker 4: I was giving. 51 00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:27,559 Speaker 3: People in my research the same. 52 00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:33,440 Speaker 4: Protocols and I was seeing completely different responses, like some 53 00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:38,080 Speaker 4: individuals losing five kilos and they're just loving life, and 54 00:02:38,120 --> 00:02:42,960 Speaker 4: then another person's working much harder than them and gained 55 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:45,480 Speaker 4: a kilo of fat and lost muscle in the same 56 00:02:45,480 --> 00:02:47,440 Speaker 4: period of time on exactly the same protocol. 57 00:02:47,480 --> 00:02:49,440 Speaker 3: And I was seeing that in private practice as well, 58 00:02:49,440 --> 00:02:50,880 Speaker 3: and that started a. 59 00:02:50,919 --> 00:02:55,360 Speaker 4: Journey that sort of took me, took me through my PhD, 60 00:02:55,520 --> 00:02:57,799 Speaker 4: but it was too late to adjust my study. I've 61 00:02:57,840 --> 00:03:00,440 Speaker 4: now been in the space of precision health and medicine 62 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:05,520 Speaker 4: for the last eleven years, ten years, and what I 63 00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:11,440 Speaker 4: do now is I educate health professionals, I educate corporates, schools, gyms, 64 00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:13,919 Speaker 4: pretty much anybody who will listen for at least five 65 00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:17,800 Speaker 4: minutes on how we're different. So how we are genetically different, 66 00:03:18,120 --> 00:03:21,200 Speaker 4: biologically different, finotypically different. That is the expression of our 67 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:24,280 Speaker 4: genes and if we can measure that, And this is 68 00:03:24,280 --> 00:03:25,720 Speaker 4: what we've been doing for the last twenty years as 69 00:03:25,720 --> 00:03:27,040 Speaker 4: an organization at Shay Group. 70 00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:28,920 Speaker 3: Is what makes you different? 71 00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:31,799 Speaker 4: And how can we quantify that so that we can 72 00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:37,240 Speaker 4: provide the best possible thing for you in that moment, 73 00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:39,680 Speaker 4: because your requirements are always changing as well, and so 74 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:42,520 Speaker 4: it's morphed from any journey of oh you got to 75 00:03:42,520 --> 00:03:44,520 Speaker 4: eat more spinach and you've got to lift that weight 76 00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:49,920 Speaker 4: to what is it to be a human on the planet? Like, 77 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:51,920 Speaker 4: what are all of these signals that are coming into 78 00:03:51,920 --> 00:03:53,800 Speaker 4: our body? How do we interpret them with our mind, 79 00:03:53,840 --> 00:03:57,080 Speaker 4: with our body? What makes life incredible? And the answer 80 00:03:57,160 --> 00:04:00,200 Speaker 4: is ultimately getting back to yourself. If you unders down 81 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:03,120 Speaker 4: yourself and if you can then contribute to others, then 82 00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:04,960 Speaker 4: you're under a winner. So all of the work is 83 00:04:04,960 --> 00:04:09,000 Speaker 4: about elevating people's awareness around themselves, how they can contribute, 84 00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:11,760 Speaker 4: how they can be the healthiest self, regressing disease as 85 00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:13,280 Speaker 4: a whole lot of research going on at the same time. 86 00:04:13,360 --> 00:04:14,680 Speaker 3: So that's a brief summary. 87 00:04:16,040 --> 00:04:19,039 Speaker 2: We have a guy another guy on who's almost as brilliant. Know, 88 00:04:19,120 --> 00:04:21,880 Speaker 2: he's just as brilliant as you, I'll say you the same, 89 00:04:21,960 --> 00:04:26,120 Speaker 2: doctor Bill Sullivan from the States, and he's a researcher 90 00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:30,000 Speaker 2: and also brilliant. We were talking the other day about essentially, 91 00:04:31,279 --> 00:04:34,239 Speaker 2: you know, something works for everybody, but not everything works 92 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:36,800 Speaker 2: for everybody, So you've got to find you something, you 93 00:04:36,839 --> 00:04:37,440 Speaker 2: know what I mean. 94 00:04:37,839 --> 00:04:41,000 Speaker 1: And it's like, especially on the fucking interwebs. 95 00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:43,680 Speaker 2: Cam you're probably not familiar with the into webs, but 96 00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:47,000 Speaker 2: there's this thing called social media. And if you pay 97 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:51,080 Speaker 2: attention to social media every second, fucker's got some product 98 00:04:51,080 --> 00:04:55,080 Speaker 2: that's going to fix everyone, some single product that's going 99 00:04:55,160 --> 00:05:01,400 Speaker 2: to universally fix every ailment known to person kind. And 100 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:04,000 Speaker 2: like it's so it's like when even when people say 101 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:07,839 Speaker 2: to me, from an excise physiology point of view, what's 102 00:05:07,880 --> 00:05:10,839 Speaker 2: the best way to you know, fill in the blank, 103 00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:14,680 Speaker 2: and I go, well, for who? Because the best way 104 00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:17,000 Speaker 2: to achieve, you know, to put on muscle for you 105 00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:18,719 Speaker 2: won't be the same as me, won't be the same 106 00:05:18,760 --> 00:05:20,680 Speaker 2: as that lady over there or that guy over there 107 00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 2: or and and you know, and even then you go, well, 108 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:26,880 Speaker 2: even if we get say that the strength training stuff right, 109 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:31,000 Speaker 2: or the muscle building stuff right from a lifting point 110 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:33,560 Speaker 2: of view, then there's all the other variables, the genetics, 111 00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:37,240 Speaker 2: the sleep, the nutrition, the stress, the anxiety, that there's 112 00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:40,880 Speaker 2: all of the other variables which impact recovery and hypertrophy. 113 00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:45,640 Speaker 2: And like people keept like you and I don't want 114 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:50,320 Speaker 2: to overcomplicate it because then we just alienate people. But 115 00:05:50,440 --> 00:05:53,960 Speaker 2: at the same time, this kind of group think that 116 00:05:54,160 --> 00:05:57,960 Speaker 2: happens on the internet, which is or here's here's a 117 00:05:58,200 --> 00:06:02,839 Speaker 2: thing that will create that outcome for you, it just ain't. 118 00:06:02,760 --> 00:06:03,400 Speaker 1: True, is it? 119 00:06:04,760 --> 00:06:08,320 Speaker 4: Well exactly, and I mean to your point, if you 120 00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:10,640 Speaker 4: watch social media very very closely, you end up on 121 00:06:10,680 --> 00:06:14,800 Speaker 4: a high fat, low fat, high protein, high carb low 122 00:06:14,839 --> 00:06:18,880 Speaker 4: carb diet that involves hit training and strength training in 123 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:22,520 Speaker 4: the same session and endless endurance but no endurance. It's 124 00:06:23,320 --> 00:06:27,080 Speaker 4: and then, as you were saying, it's what's been so 125 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:30,160 Speaker 4: fascinating and probably going back to our first ever podcast, 126 00:06:30,160 --> 00:06:32,720 Speaker 4: we're talking about chronobiology. Even the timing of when you 127 00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:34,960 Speaker 4: do these activities can actually be the difference between if 128 00:06:34,960 --> 00:06:37,320 Speaker 4: you get a result and if you don't. And then 129 00:06:37,960 --> 00:06:40,960 Speaker 4: the mental stress that plays down into your body and 130 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:44,000 Speaker 4: influences your results as well. And everybody has a different 131 00:06:44,080 --> 00:06:46,560 Speaker 4: thing that's going to stress the mentally. So just this 132 00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:49,839 Speaker 4: idea that you've got to find exactly your something. It 133 00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:54,039 Speaker 4: is incredibly complex, and there is a really really simple path, 134 00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:57,120 Speaker 4: and that is go and meditate on a mountain for 135 00:06:57,160 --> 00:07:00,920 Speaker 4: three years and you'll find yourself and this is this 136 00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:03,479 Speaker 4: is where we're trying to essentially, is what modern medicine 137 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:05,320 Speaker 4: is trying to do. It's trying to shorten the path 138 00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:08,560 Speaker 4: back to you. But we lost our way with just 139 00:07:08,560 --> 00:07:11,600 Speaker 4: trying to look at one chemical and one product and 140 00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:14,720 Speaker 4: one pathway and one drug. It's you've got to look 141 00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:17,480 Speaker 4: at the whole system and how that's interacting together. 142 00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:18,920 Speaker 3: And that's where the complex it is. 143 00:07:18,920 --> 00:07:22,480 Speaker 4: But that's also where you know, we have an inner 144 00:07:22,520 --> 00:07:25,680 Speaker 4: intelligence that allows us to get there too. It just 145 00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:28,520 Speaker 4: it can be assisted by a lot of these new 146 00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:30,840 Speaker 4: things that I'm fortunate to work with these days. 147 00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:34,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's amazing. Before we jumped on the show, 148 00:07:34,640 --> 00:07:37,040 Speaker 2: I said, what have you been up to? And you 149 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:39,800 Speaker 2: told me a few things. I said, let's talk about 150 00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:44,640 Speaker 2: that because I think people will be interested. So just 151 00:07:44,720 --> 00:07:47,040 Speaker 2: repeat for my group what you're telling me that you've 152 00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:49,560 Speaker 2: been kind of opening the door on recently, and let's 153 00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:50,640 Speaker 2: have a chat. Yeah. 154 00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:53,760 Speaker 4: Yeah, going back a bit to the piece around like, 155 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:56,920 Speaker 4: oh no, I was a dietitian. Everything in my focus 156 00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:58,560 Speaker 4: was I've just got to get this person to eat 157 00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:01,080 Speaker 4: the right food, and I would essentially assess them as 158 00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:04,360 Speaker 4: a person and I would get them to assess themselves 159 00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:06,160 Speaker 4: as a person based on am I putting the right 160 00:08:06,240 --> 00:08:07,280 Speaker 4: vegetable into my mouth? 161 00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:08,080 Speaker 1: Yes? 162 00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:12,760 Speaker 4: And what I've what's been so clear and I guess 163 00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:15,400 Speaker 4: in my own personal development, but also just watching how 164 00:08:16,080 --> 00:08:19,280 Speaker 4: people interact with health at a much bigger scale and 165 00:08:19,320 --> 00:08:24,560 Speaker 4: what I always wonder one the I've been so fascinated 166 00:08:24,600 --> 00:08:28,160 Speaker 4: by what truly makes a person happy because it's not 167 00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:31,360 Speaker 4: your weight, it's not your food, it's not your exercise, 168 00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:33,440 Speaker 4: it's not your relationships, it's not the place you live. 169 00:08:33,520 --> 00:08:35,360 Speaker 4: But it's a combination of all of those things, and 170 00:08:35,360 --> 00:08:38,920 Speaker 4: then who you are in it too. And when you 171 00:08:38,920 --> 00:08:41,360 Speaker 4: start looking at some of the research around someone having purpose, 172 00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:45,360 Speaker 4: you know, there's every philosophy from ancient to modern has 173 00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:48,000 Speaker 4: some sort of you've got to have a purpose. Then 174 00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:52,240 Speaker 4: there's also this whole thing around love and relationships and 175 00:08:52,280 --> 00:08:55,360 Speaker 4: the importance of community and connection and how important that 176 00:08:55,440 --> 00:08:57,920 Speaker 4: is for survival. Whether it be in nursing homes or 177 00:08:57,960 --> 00:09:01,560 Speaker 4: blue zones, it's all the same. You need connection to 178 00:09:01,640 --> 00:09:04,120 Speaker 4: be to feel like you're living and to have a 179 00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:08,160 Speaker 4: meaningful life. And then there's also the idea of flow, 180 00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:10,920 Speaker 4: which is this I guess in a way a fancy. 181 00:09:11,320 --> 00:09:14,120 Speaker 4: It's not a buzzword, but it is. It's a real 182 00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:18,400 Speaker 4: physiological state of doing the thing in your strength and 183 00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:21,640 Speaker 4: feeling like the world has just disappeared and the only 184 00:09:21,640 --> 00:09:23,760 Speaker 4: thing that exists is this front thing in front of 185 00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:27,400 Speaker 4: you right now, with a transcendence of time and all 186 00:09:27,520 --> 00:09:31,440 Speaker 4: a euphoric state of productivity and contribution. So what was 187 00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:34,040 Speaker 4: so fascinating about all of those things is in each 188 00:09:34,080 --> 00:09:36,800 Speaker 4: of those things you feel like you are completely alive. 189 00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:39,000 Speaker 4: Like when you love, you feel like you're completely alive. 190 00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:40,720 Speaker 4: When you're living on purpose and you have a really 191 00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:44,000 Speaker 4: clear purpose, you feel like you're alive when you are 192 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:44,600 Speaker 4: in flow. 193 00:09:44,640 --> 00:09:45,720 Speaker 3: It's a holy crap. 194 00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:49,880 Speaker 4: That felt so good, And it's sort of come to 195 00:09:49,920 --> 00:09:53,640 Speaker 4: the point of thinking, why are we not chasing this 196 00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:56,200 Speaker 4: feeling all of the time? You know, and how much 197 00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:59,040 Speaker 4: of our education is actually about purpose, how much of 198 00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:03,480 Speaker 4: it is about connecting with a person incredibly deeply, how 199 00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:06,000 Speaker 4: much of it is about, Hey, what's the what are 200 00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:07,920 Speaker 4: your natural strengths and what's the best way that we 201 00:10:07,960 --> 00:10:09,720 Speaker 4: can bring them to life with what you can do 202 00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:12,840 Speaker 4: and mastery and get you into flow so that you 203 00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:17,559 Speaker 4: are absolutely flowing. We compromise, We as a society, we 204 00:10:17,920 --> 00:10:21,360 Speaker 4: don't focus on the things that truly make us happy. 205 00:10:21,360 --> 00:10:24,240 Speaker 4: And what gets me excited from a physiological standpoint, being 206 00:10:24,280 --> 00:10:28,040 Speaker 4: the slight science nerd that I am, is that the 207 00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:32,280 Speaker 4: physiological signature, so the chemicals that release and the system, 208 00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:34,959 Speaker 4: the blood pressure and all of those blood sugar levels 209 00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:37,719 Speaker 4: and quarterisle levels. Whenever you look at each of those 210 00:10:37,760 --> 00:10:43,840 Speaker 4: states purpose, flow, and love, they have almost identical signatures 211 00:10:44,600 --> 00:10:48,959 Speaker 4: except for the one individual kind of chemical that they 212 00:10:49,040 --> 00:10:51,839 Speaker 4: speak to that represents that thing I want, which we 213 00:10:51,880 --> 00:10:55,880 Speaker 4: can get into, I'm sure, and the I guess it's 214 00:10:56,240 --> 00:11:00,120 Speaker 4: sort of helped me come to a point where I'm thinking, well, 215 00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:03,079 Speaker 4: if we're going to be talking about anything, why wouldn't 216 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:04,960 Speaker 4: we be talking about I'm talking about just in general, 217 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:07,720 Speaker 4: Why wouldn't we be talking about what actually truly brings 218 00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:11,440 Speaker 4: you happiness? Because as a dietician, the best meal plan 219 00:11:11,480 --> 00:11:13,400 Speaker 4: didn't really bring someone happiness. 220 00:11:13,559 --> 00:11:16,520 Speaker 3: It was It's a much greater thing than that. 221 00:11:16,559 --> 00:11:18,920 Speaker 4: But what's so fascinating about it is to get into 222 00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:21,839 Speaker 4: that physiological state is actually different for everybody as well. 223 00:11:21,880 --> 00:11:23,760 Speaker 4: What love is to one person is very different to 224 00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:26,800 Speaker 4: another person, what flow is it, etc. So that was 225 00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:29,440 Speaker 4: the preamble probably longer than what you planned, mate, but 226 00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:32,960 Speaker 4: that's the preamble to my thought process. 227 00:11:33,440 --> 00:11:33,920 Speaker 1: I love it. 228 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:35,840 Speaker 2: I love it well, all of those things I wrote 229 00:11:35,840 --> 00:11:39,319 Speaker 2: them down, happiness, purpose, love, connection, flow. Yeah, they're intertwined 230 00:11:39,360 --> 00:11:43,679 Speaker 2: and like what I find interesting ause you come. I mean, obviously, 231 00:11:43,960 --> 00:11:47,760 Speaker 2: originally I came from an exercise science space, but the 232 00:11:47,840 --> 00:11:50,680 Speaker 2: last while more I think about the head stuff, the 233 00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:54,119 Speaker 2: psychology of it all. When I'm talking to someone about happiness. 234 00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:57,160 Speaker 2: You know, we've got right now, thousands of people will 235 00:11:57,200 --> 00:12:02,120 Speaker 2: listen to this and even the word happiness, Like you 236 00:12:02,160 --> 00:12:06,880 Speaker 2: think about a word, and so what the state that 237 00:12:07,080 --> 00:12:09,800 Speaker 2: I might be in or the feeling that I might 238 00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:13,880 Speaker 2: have Craig Harper and I attach that label. I mean, 239 00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:20,960 Speaker 2: it's just a word that we use to describe a state, psychological, emotional, physiological, 240 00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:23,679 Speaker 2: you know. And for me, I have this feeling or 241 00:12:23,760 --> 00:12:28,040 Speaker 2: this sensation that I'm in and I call that happiness 242 00:12:28,480 --> 00:12:33,240 Speaker 2: or I call that contentment, or I call that joy, 243 00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:37,880 Speaker 2: or I call that calm. Now, you and I unlikely, 244 00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:40,480 Speaker 2: But let's say in some alternate universe we're in the 245 00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:44,240 Speaker 2: exact same state, but we each have a different label 246 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:50,840 Speaker 2: for it. Yeah, because there's that, you know, that cognitive, educational, 247 00:12:51,840 --> 00:12:55,880 Speaker 2: philosophical window through which we analyze and interpret shit and 248 00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:58,600 Speaker 2: I go, oh, I'm happy, and you go, yeah, I'm 249 00:12:58,640 --> 00:13:02,360 Speaker 2: just joyful. Or so there's that there's that other other 250 00:13:02,440 --> 00:13:07,960 Speaker 2: than all the physiological individuality, there's that cognitive, emotional, psychological 251 00:13:08,040 --> 00:13:12,520 Speaker 2: perception stuff. That's that that's interwoven in all. 252 00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:19,040 Speaker 4: Of this, right, absolutely, and it's absolutely and it's and 253 00:13:19,960 --> 00:13:22,320 Speaker 4: as you were saying so many of those things. It's 254 00:13:22,880 --> 00:13:25,800 Speaker 4: what we've found is that there's the like the genetic 255 00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:28,480 Speaker 4: differences that we have, the biological differences that we have, 256 00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:32,760 Speaker 4: can determine you know, someone running up a hill and 257 00:13:32,920 --> 00:13:36,719 Speaker 4: about to vomit is euphoria for one person because their 258 00:13:36,720 --> 00:13:38,880 Speaker 4: brain is so geared towards that pain. And I know 259 00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:40,160 Speaker 4: that's a little bit different to what you're saying, but 260 00:13:40,160 --> 00:13:42,920 Speaker 4: I'll come background on it. Whereas another person it is 261 00:13:43,400 --> 00:13:46,240 Speaker 4: the worst possible experience of their life to be almost vomiting, 262 00:13:46,280 --> 00:13:48,320 Speaker 4: running up a hill, trying to do exercise. It just 263 00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:51,520 Speaker 4: feels like the world is collapsing on them. At the 264 00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:55,280 Speaker 4: same time, you have two people that are you know, 265 00:13:55,360 --> 00:13:59,080 Speaker 4: sitting down on their birthdays, surrounded by their friends, feeling 266 00:13:59,120 --> 00:14:04,160 Speaker 4: lots of love, and in the expression of that as well, 267 00:14:04,320 --> 00:14:07,640 Speaker 4: someone just get One person gets really really excited and 268 00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:10,800 Speaker 4: wants to explode and shout and sing, and another person 269 00:14:10,920 --> 00:14:14,320 Speaker 4: wants to is completely exhausted by all of that attention 270 00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:17,079 Speaker 4: and connection and need to have a two hour break 271 00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:20,200 Speaker 4: away from everybody because it's actually so expensive for their 272 00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:25,120 Speaker 4: energy as well. So it's yeah, these are the It's 273 00:14:25,120 --> 00:14:27,800 Speaker 4: the beautiful thing is that our experience is so different 274 00:14:27,840 --> 00:14:32,760 Speaker 4: and probably talking to many different people, like primarily health professionals, 275 00:14:32,760 --> 00:14:37,800 Speaker 4: corporate schools, there is the first assumption that everybody is 276 00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:40,920 Speaker 4: different to you is something that is so hard to 277 00:14:40,920 --> 00:14:44,800 Speaker 4: get your head around, and it's to truly sit in 278 00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:48,800 Speaker 4: empathy and to really understand what somebody is feeling. It 279 00:14:48,880 --> 00:14:52,280 Speaker 4: takes an incredible amount of self awareness and mindfulness. It's 280 00:14:52,720 --> 00:14:55,120 Speaker 4: the assumption that other people think the way that we do, 281 00:14:56,280 --> 00:14:59,600 Speaker 4: and therefore the disconnection that we have with them as 282 00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:05,520 Speaker 4: a result is it's so big and the it's even 283 00:15:05,560 --> 00:15:08,960 Speaker 4: in this space for so long, understanding what it's like 284 00:15:09,080 --> 00:15:15,080 Speaker 4: to be in somebody else's feeling is it's it's it 285 00:15:15,160 --> 00:15:16,840 Speaker 4: takes a long time, and it's taken me a long 286 00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:18,720 Speaker 4: time to even get a whisper of it in a 287 00:15:18,720 --> 00:15:20,800 Speaker 4: real way that you know. 288 00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:23,640 Speaker 2: Thinking that people think like us. There's a name for that. 289 00:15:23,760 --> 00:15:27,360 Speaker 2: It's called the false consensus effect, you know, where we 290 00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:32,520 Speaker 2: automatically assume that because we speak the same language and 291 00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:34,920 Speaker 2: you and me are both blokes and we're both into that. 292 00:15:35,120 --> 00:15:39,920 Speaker 2: Whatever I might assume like, I wouldn't because I'm this 293 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:43,720 Speaker 2: is my area of research. But I typically typical people, 294 00:15:43,760 --> 00:15:47,040 Speaker 2: which is not bad, of course, It's just the human experience. 295 00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:50,080 Speaker 2: We think that others think like us, and so therefore 296 00:15:50,520 --> 00:15:54,120 Speaker 2: we get surprised when, for example, our intention is not 297 00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:58,440 Speaker 2: their experience. Yes, it's like, oh, I was just giving 298 00:15:58,480 --> 00:15:59,520 Speaker 2: I was just helping Cam. 299 00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:01,160 Speaker 1: That was my intention. 300 00:16:01,400 --> 00:16:04,320 Speaker 2: Cam's experience was why the fuck is this guy always 301 00:16:04,320 --> 00:16:07,440 Speaker 2: give me feedback I haven't asked for? Or why is 302 00:16:07,480 --> 00:16:11,600 Speaker 2: this guy interfering? You know, there's that real disconnect between 303 00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:15,360 Speaker 2: what I think I'm putting out into the world, whether 304 00:16:15,400 --> 00:16:19,960 Speaker 2: that's an individual or a million people on a podcast, 305 00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:23,240 Speaker 2: what I think I'm putting out and what the individuals 306 00:16:23,280 --> 00:16:26,240 Speaker 2: are receiving. And not only just to add another layer 307 00:16:26,280 --> 00:16:30,320 Speaker 2: of complexity and curiosity, is that everyone that's listening is 308 00:16:30,360 --> 00:16:31,480 Speaker 2: getting something different. 309 00:16:31,920 --> 00:16:34,880 Speaker 3: Absolutely that idea as well, is so. 310 00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:39,520 Speaker 4: I have an incredible amount of compassion for it because 311 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:40,960 Speaker 4: I'm still in it in many ways, like. 312 00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:43,480 Speaker 3: I still have the default thought with. 313 00:16:43,360 --> 00:16:46,520 Speaker 4: My ten year old child that they're going to pick 314 00:16:46,600 --> 00:16:48,880 Speaker 4: up what I'm putting down, like I'm saying no because 315 00:16:48,880 --> 00:16:51,480 Speaker 4: I love you, and they are saying I definitely hate 316 00:16:51,520 --> 00:16:57,120 Speaker 4: you right now, and that's not my intention. And I 317 00:16:57,240 --> 00:16:59,000 Speaker 4: used to rest on that a lot, you know, even 318 00:16:59,080 --> 00:17:01,720 Speaker 4: speaking personally, like, well, my intention is good, so everything 319 00:17:01,720 --> 00:17:02,320 Speaker 4: will work out. 320 00:17:02,360 --> 00:17:04,359 Speaker 3: But it's just not the case. 321 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:06,439 Speaker 4: You just don't know what a person's history is and 322 00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:08,880 Speaker 4: what they've experienced and how they've interpreted what you've said. 323 00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:12,159 Speaker 4: And that's probably one of the more fascinating things that 324 00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:16,080 Speaker 4: has really dawned on some of the reading that I've 325 00:17:16,080 --> 00:17:19,560 Speaker 4: been doing in preparation for talks and things like that, 326 00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:22,959 Speaker 4: just around this idea of purpose, and in the Western world, 327 00:17:24,880 --> 00:17:27,439 Speaker 4: it is purpose is what am I going to do? 328 00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:30,359 Speaker 4: What am I here for? What's my goal in life? 329 00:17:30,359 --> 00:17:33,359 Speaker 4: What's going to mean that my life is meaningful? And 330 00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:35,640 Speaker 4: what's so fascinating when you go back through the Eastern 331 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:38,560 Speaker 4: philosophies of purpose, which which speaks to what we're talking 332 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:43,040 Speaker 4: about here, and that is their philosophy on purpose is 333 00:17:43,119 --> 00:17:46,520 Speaker 4: what is my role in the community, What are the 334 00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:49,760 Speaker 4: things that I'm great at? And how can I contribute 335 00:17:49,800 --> 00:17:53,280 Speaker 4: those things to the community. And from that frame it 336 00:17:53,400 --> 00:17:55,720 Speaker 4: is so different. And when you think about your intention, 337 00:17:55,920 --> 00:17:58,280 Speaker 4: it's well, your intention doesn't matter in that context. What 338 00:17:58,359 --> 00:18:01,280 Speaker 4: matters is what am I here in the community for? 339 00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:06,000 Speaker 4: And yes, that has been that. It was a particularly 340 00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:09,000 Speaker 4: powerful moment for me to read that to actually it 341 00:18:09,200 --> 00:18:12,399 Speaker 4: completely changed so much of my thinking about what my 342 00:18:12,560 --> 00:18:14,320 Speaker 4: purpose is and where my focus is. And I was 343 00:18:14,359 --> 00:18:18,040 Speaker 4: wondering why I was feeling so unsatisfied for a couple 344 00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:20,680 Speaker 4: of years focusing on a purpose that was just mine 345 00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:23,399 Speaker 4: rather than thinking about the role that I'm here to 346 00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:25,919 Speaker 4: play in the various people in my life and the 347 00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:29,320 Speaker 4: people that I connect with. And in that way, if 348 00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:34,960 Speaker 4: we're thinking about purpose in that perspective, it starts helping 349 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:37,600 Speaker 4: us navigate this idea of intention and what's received. 350 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:43,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, I love it. So there's a framework that there's 351 00:18:43,840 --> 00:18:46,440 Speaker 2: very similar things around. I kind of expanded on a 352 00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:49,080 Speaker 2: version of it which I'm doing a Monday night mentoring group, 353 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:51,640 Speaker 2: and we went through it not last week, the week 354 00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:53,440 Speaker 2: before shout Out to my mentees. 355 00:18:54,359 --> 00:18:58,760 Speaker 1: And it's kind of this. It's almost. 356 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:04,159 Speaker 2: An exercise in trying to understand yourself, right, And it 357 00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:09,639 Speaker 2: starts with self reflection, no judgment, just fucking. 358 00:19:09,400 --> 00:19:11,639 Speaker 1: Oh why did I do that? What's that about? Or 359 00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:15,000 Speaker 1: why am I? Oh? Right now I'm trying to impress cam. 360 00:19:15,480 --> 00:19:18,159 Speaker 1: Oh what's that about? You know? Just awareness? 361 00:19:18,440 --> 00:19:18,600 Speaker 2: Right? 362 00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:20,679 Speaker 1: But where's that coming from? 363 00:19:21,040 --> 00:19:23,760 Speaker 2: Or just reflection and then the awareness, oh, this is 364 00:19:23,760 --> 00:19:26,440 Speaker 2: what I'm doing this, And then it goes through self 365 00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:29,160 Speaker 2: knowledge and then the last two you'll like. So there's 366 00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:31,639 Speaker 2: eight steps. You don't need me to send it to you, 367 00:19:31,640 --> 00:19:32,960 Speaker 2: but I'm happy to send it to you because it 368 00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:35,520 Speaker 2: fits in with your stuff, right. The second last one 369 00:19:35,560 --> 00:19:39,919 Speaker 2: is self actualization, which is you becoming kind of the 370 00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:42,840 Speaker 2: best version of you and you starting to fulfill your 371 00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:46,560 Speaker 2: potential and tick the boxes and reach goals and all 372 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:50,080 Speaker 2: that kind of stuff. But the last one is self transcendence, yes, 373 00:19:50,119 --> 00:19:52,679 Speaker 2: which is about you having a purpose and an awareness 374 00:19:52,720 --> 00:19:54,400 Speaker 2: and a reason bigger than you. 375 00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:54,920 Speaker 1: Yes. 376 00:19:55,040 --> 00:19:57,960 Speaker 2: And this is where the fucking great stuff happens, you know, 377 00:19:58,480 --> 00:20:01,760 Speaker 2: because we're so much in our culture, very much about 378 00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:04,600 Speaker 2: self actualization. Me me, me me, I want to be 379 00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:06,199 Speaker 2: the best me I want to be this me. 380 00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:07,720 Speaker 1: I want to be that me. I want to reach 381 00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:08,320 Speaker 1: my goals. 382 00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:11,720 Speaker 2: I want to fulfill my potential. That's cool, that's cool. 383 00:20:11,800 --> 00:20:14,359 Speaker 2: But the next one is like, I want to be 384 00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:17,639 Speaker 2: all that. I want to serve and I want to 385 00:20:18,280 --> 00:20:20,439 Speaker 2: you know, I want to have a purpose and an 386 00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:23,119 Speaker 2: awareness and a reason, like I said, bigger than the 387 00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:25,159 Speaker 2: self that sits in the middle of my life. 388 00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:26,280 Speaker 3: Yeah. 389 00:20:26,320 --> 00:20:29,040 Speaker 4: Absolutely, And so just picking up on a few of 390 00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:31,480 Speaker 4: those points the self awareness piece. This is what's so 391 00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:37,440 Speaker 4: fascinating about the personalization thing in that if you compare 392 00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:39,480 Speaker 4: yourself to like, let's say that you're both going through 393 00:20:39,520 --> 00:20:42,359 Speaker 4: the same emotion, like we were talking about before, and 394 00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:45,200 Speaker 4: you compare yourself to, Oh why am I feeling that way? 395 00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:48,160 Speaker 3: The answer is so different for each of us. And 396 00:20:48,840 --> 00:20:50,000 Speaker 3: some individuals are. 397 00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:56,240 Speaker 4: Naturally fiery, they're naturally competitive, they're naturally direct, they're naturally 398 00:20:56,520 --> 00:21:01,760 Speaker 4: just say first and think later. And compared to somebody else, 399 00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:03,520 Speaker 4: like they might be in a partnership with somebody who's 400 00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:08,119 Speaker 4: incredibly calm, considerate, they like to take time on their thoughts. 401 00:21:08,160 --> 00:21:11,600 Speaker 4: They only say what they truly mean. And when you've 402 00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:14,440 Speaker 4: got those two people in a room and they're trying 403 00:21:14,480 --> 00:21:16,960 Speaker 4: to understand each other, and they're coming from both of 404 00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:18,960 Speaker 4: their frames of reference. One person saying, why an't you 405 00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:20,880 Speaker 4: just more energized, Why don't you just to have a go, 406 00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:22,479 Speaker 4: Why don't you just take a chance, And the other 407 00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:26,199 Speaker 4: person's thinking, you waste so much energy, you know, you know, 408 00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:28,280 Speaker 4: doing all of these things and trying lots of new 409 00:21:28,280 --> 00:21:30,399 Speaker 4: things and not sticking to one thing and whatever it 410 00:21:30,480 --> 00:21:34,160 Speaker 4: might be, and just you can end up thinking what's 411 00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:34,800 Speaker 4: wrong with me? 412 00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,879 Speaker 3: And I see this with food as well. You know, 413 00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:39,119 Speaker 3: some individuals are doing. 414 00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:41,960 Speaker 4: Their five meals per day paleo diets and getting to 415 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:43,480 Speaker 4: boot camps in the morning, and then they put on 416 00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:46,560 Speaker 4: three kilos and getting the injury, and then all I 417 00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:50,400 Speaker 4: have to do is actually do a completely different protocol 418 00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:52,119 Speaker 4: of food, which is, you know, three meals a day 419 00:21:52,160 --> 00:21:54,600 Speaker 4: and wait training in the afternoon and slow cardio in 420 00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:57,040 Speaker 4: the morning, and all of their dreams come true health wise. 421 00:21:57,600 --> 00:22:00,359 Speaker 4: When it comes to that self awareness piece, we aren't 422 00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:04,879 Speaker 4: educated in truly understanding all of the different factors to 423 00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:07,560 Speaker 4: us because and that's just the biological piece, is that 424 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:13,400 Speaker 4: we are genuinely physically different, and then it infiltrates how 425 00:22:13,480 --> 00:22:16,879 Speaker 4: we then interpret ourselves, whether we judge ourselves, whether we 426 00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:23,240 Speaker 4: accept ourselves. And so when it comes to that concept 427 00:22:23,359 --> 00:22:28,679 Speaker 4: for me of self actualization and self transcendence, it's not 428 00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:34,200 Speaker 4: about being great like your hero or whatever it might be. 429 00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:39,159 Speaker 4: It's actually about really really knowing your strengths, really knowing 430 00:22:39,280 --> 00:22:42,160 Speaker 4: the things that provide you energy, knowing the things that 431 00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:46,240 Speaker 4: make your body feel best. It's doing all of those 432 00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:51,520 Speaker 4: things routinely and then and then understanding how you can 433 00:22:51,560 --> 00:22:55,760 Speaker 4: bring your gifts but also recognizing somebody else's gifts at 434 00:22:55,800 --> 00:22:58,280 Speaker 4: the same time. And this is where you get that 435 00:22:58,320 --> 00:23:02,720 Speaker 4: beautiful combination of purpose and connection all happening at the 436 00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:03,200 Speaker 4: same time. 437 00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:07,680 Speaker 3: Truly, we have the the. 438 00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:13,160 Speaker 4: Mechanics, the intellect, and the knowledge to truly have an 439 00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:16,720 Speaker 4: incredibly blissful existence on this planet, and we create so 440 00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:21,480 Speaker 4: much noise as we are lost in all of a 441 00:23:21,560 --> 00:23:24,160 Speaker 4: lack of self awareness, a lack of self acceptance at 442 00:23:24,200 --> 00:23:24,800 Speaker 4: a core level. 443 00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:28,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, so good, dude, I like it. 444 00:23:29,160 --> 00:23:35,680 Speaker 2: I'm always interested in the conversation around identity in relation 445 00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:39,200 Speaker 2: to what we're talking about, because that who am I? 446 00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:42,240 Speaker 2: That's you know, the self that like, what the fuck 447 00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:42,840 Speaker 2: am I about? 448 00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:44,840 Speaker 1: What's my reason? What's my purpose. Who am I? 449 00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:50,320 Speaker 2: But in our I'm generalizing here, so listener, this might 450 00:23:50,359 --> 00:23:52,080 Speaker 2: not be you. But for a lot of people, their 451 00:23:52,119 --> 00:23:56,400 Speaker 2: identity is about their stuff. It's about their body, it's 452 00:23:56,400 --> 00:23:59,240 Speaker 2: about their brand, it's about their balance, about their job, 453 00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:03,919 Speaker 2: about their reputation, it's about their fucking the number of 454 00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:06,800 Speaker 2: podcast listeners. What are you saying, harps nothing, fuck off? 455 00:24:07,119 --> 00:24:09,960 Speaker 2: You know, it's about all of that stuff that other 456 00:24:10,040 --> 00:24:12,680 Speaker 2: people can see. I get my sense of self, or 457 00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:15,960 Speaker 2: I get my identity from knowing that I'm right by 458 00:24:16,000 --> 00:24:17,680 Speaker 2: the way, I'm in the One True Church. 459 00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:20,720 Speaker 1: We're going to heaven. You're not. You know, I'm in 460 00:24:20,760 --> 00:24:22,160 Speaker 1: the light, you're in the darkness. 461 00:24:22,160 --> 00:24:25,760 Speaker 2: Blah blah, all that kind of all of that external 462 00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:28,760 Speaker 2: stuff of trying to understand the self, and then one 463 00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:32,879 Speaker 2: day you find out that something that you believed is bullshit, 464 00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:37,720 Speaker 2: something that your identity was intertwined with, and then you're 465 00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:40,840 Speaker 2: fucked because you go, well, shit, if that's not true, 466 00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:45,440 Speaker 2: then who am I? Because that's been part of you know, 467 00:24:45,880 --> 00:24:48,760 Speaker 2: my existence and my purpose and myself. 468 00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:55,920 Speaker 4: Yes, absolutely, and yes, and that's a it's a mismatch of. 469 00:24:57,520 --> 00:24:59,919 Speaker 3: What identity is and what my immediate purpose. 470 00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:05,120 Speaker 4: It's describing the identity as a being in it's who 471 00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:08,879 Speaker 4: you are as opposed to what you do. Then the 472 00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:12,120 Speaker 4: purpose it is the personification or that the action related 473 00:25:12,160 --> 00:25:14,359 Speaker 4: to that, and probably the thing that came up for 474 00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:16,880 Speaker 4: me and I guess I'm just turning some things over 475 00:25:16,960 --> 00:25:21,600 Speaker 4: my mind as we talk. Here was the transition from 476 00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:29,280 Speaker 4: working professional partner into mum and the identity crisis that 477 00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:34,159 Speaker 4: happens at that point because we mix up the idea that. 478 00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:40,720 Speaker 3: What we're doing is our identity and at the core 479 00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:41,120 Speaker 3: of things. 480 00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:43,639 Speaker 4: And this is what we see genetically, is that people 481 00:25:43,680 --> 00:25:45,600 Speaker 4: become more like their. 482 00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:48,680 Speaker 3: Genes as they age. So the longer that. 483 00:25:48,640 --> 00:25:51,520 Speaker 4: You're on the planet, the more predictable your personality is 484 00:25:51,520 --> 00:25:54,080 Speaker 4: compared to your genetics. So it's like our whole life, 485 00:25:54,080 --> 00:25:57,639 Speaker 4: we are discovering our genetic makeup. And an example of 486 00:25:57,640 --> 00:26:00,840 Speaker 4: that is, let's say that you've got some testoster and sensitivity. 487 00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:03,520 Speaker 3: You will know that you're more competitive than other people. 488 00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:05,720 Speaker 4: You'll know that you're more aggressive, you'll know that you're 489 00:26:05,720 --> 00:26:10,080 Speaker 4: more direct, and that's a genetic marker that creates a 490 00:26:10,119 --> 00:26:13,920 Speaker 4: receptor that influences the way that your body responds to things. 491 00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:18,240 Speaker 4: And that's there, and you discover that and become more 492 00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:20,399 Speaker 4: comfortable with it over time, and you get criticized for it, 493 00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,960 Speaker 4: and then you question yourself and you get very confused 494 00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:25,520 Speaker 4: about who you are and then you realize. And probably 495 00:26:25,560 --> 00:26:27,160 Speaker 4: one of the other things as well that you see 496 00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:32,000 Speaker 4: is people when they start to interpret and get the 497 00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:35,160 Speaker 4: information on oh, this is my makeup, this is this 498 00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:38,760 Speaker 4: is my natural biological self. The things that they thought 499 00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:41,760 Speaker 4: they were they now know that they are. And there's 500 00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:45,320 Speaker 4: a huge sense of grounded relief that comes along with 501 00:26:45,359 --> 00:26:49,480 Speaker 4: the sense of knowing rather than an inkling and questioning 502 00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:49,960 Speaker 4: as to. 503 00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:52,280 Speaker 3: Oh, should I be like that? Do I like waking 504 00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:53,439 Speaker 3: up later? You know? 505 00:26:54,080 --> 00:26:55,560 Speaker 4: I mean, I guess I get up early, but do 506 00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:58,520 Speaker 4: I really know? Actually, I just love waking up later. 507 00:26:58,600 --> 00:27:02,320 Speaker 4: I love being more relaxed in the morning. Like that's 508 00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:05,880 Speaker 4: who I am. I am a thinker, or I do 509 00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:12,240 Speaker 4: act impulsively, whatever it may be. So I've definitely lost 510 00:27:12,440 --> 00:27:14,760 Speaker 4: the train of thought of well, that's her identity and purpose. 511 00:27:14,840 --> 00:27:19,359 Speaker 4: And so when we're looking at identity, even at children, 512 00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:21,840 Speaker 4: like the level of children, is that this biology and 513 00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:25,720 Speaker 4: these responses e genetic influencers are actually playing out. But 514 00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:29,919 Speaker 4: what we see is that kids represent about their personality 515 00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:33,200 Speaker 4: is fifteen percent genetics when they're younger, and that's because 516 00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:35,960 Speaker 4: they are constantly monitoring the environment to say, how do 517 00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:38,480 Speaker 4: I fit in? How do I survive? And what we're 518 00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:41,879 Speaker 4: doing right now is we're helping children understand, hey, this 519 00:27:42,119 --> 00:27:45,639 Speaker 4: is your makeup right here, and you can do some 520 00:27:45,720 --> 00:27:48,320 Speaker 4: incredible things with that. And that child over there they've 521 00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:50,119 Speaker 4: got a different makeup too, and they're going to do 522 00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:53,119 Speaker 4: some incredible things with that too. The more sure you 523 00:27:53,160 --> 00:27:57,639 Speaker 4: are of yourself earlier on, in an accepting, an encouraged, 524 00:27:57,680 --> 00:28:01,440 Speaker 4: and a celebrated way, stress that you'll be under because 525 00:28:01,840 --> 00:28:05,080 Speaker 4: when you feel like you are yourself when you're and 526 00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:07,439 Speaker 4: this is where you're in your strength, and this is 527 00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:13,080 Speaker 4: essentially flow. You get this incredible release of nora adrenaline 528 00:28:13,080 --> 00:28:15,520 Speaker 4: and don't meant to make you alert. You also get 529 00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:19,160 Speaker 4: more serotone to make you calm. You also get low 530 00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:23,600 Speaker 4: cortisol and a better heart rhythm that indicates lower stress. 531 00:28:23,640 --> 00:28:26,600 Speaker 4: So you're calm and attentive and focused, and that's where 532 00:28:26,640 --> 00:28:29,080 Speaker 4: great stuff happens. That's where flow happens. If you add 533 00:28:29,119 --> 00:28:33,000 Speaker 4: in an andamide, which is the cannabinoid sort of reward hormone, 534 00:28:33,040 --> 00:28:36,320 Speaker 4: then it's flow. If you add in oxytocin and it's 535 00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:41,960 Speaker 4: happening with somebody else, then it's love. And the for 536 00:28:42,040 --> 00:28:44,560 Speaker 4: a person to sit in their strengths and be competitive 537 00:28:44,640 --> 00:28:47,840 Speaker 4: because they're competitive and direct, and then somebody else to say, 538 00:28:47,880 --> 00:28:50,880 Speaker 4: geez I love your competition, geez I love your directness, 539 00:28:51,080 --> 00:28:53,720 Speaker 4: it firms up their identity. And so when they become 540 00:28:53,720 --> 00:28:55,120 Speaker 4: a mum, and this is what we see with this 541 00:28:55,160 --> 00:28:57,959 Speaker 4: type of individual. Normally, this kind of person have a 542 00:28:58,000 --> 00:29:03,040 Speaker 4: really intense, short attention span and they don't want to 543 00:29:03,080 --> 00:29:05,920 Speaker 4: sit with their child all day long. They just want 544 00:29:05,920 --> 00:29:08,880 Speaker 4: to like interact with them and then leave because they're like, Okay, 545 00:29:08,920 --> 00:29:11,280 Speaker 4: I'm a little bit bored now. This child's just lying 546 00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:13,400 Speaker 4: down for six months NonStop and I'm not going to 547 00:29:13,640 --> 00:29:14,520 Speaker 4: survive through that. 548 00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:17,440 Speaker 3: So but them knowing it's. 549 00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:20,760 Speaker 4: Like, oh, I'm competitive and intense and I like high 550 00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:24,400 Speaker 4: intensity action and then I like rest. And they realize 551 00:29:24,400 --> 00:29:28,120 Speaker 4: that their identity still exists. Their purpose has changed and 552 00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:32,440 Speaker 4: now they've got a high intensity interval look after their child. 553 00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:34,760 Speaker 4: And if they do that, if they bring their natural 554 00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:37,800 Speaker 4: sense of self to the activity that they're. 555 00:29:37,560 --> 00:29:40,560 Speaker 3: Doing, it informs them and then allows them to stay 556 00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:40,920 Speaker 3: and flow. 557 00:29:40,960 --> 00:29:44,000 Speaker 4: But normally because we have norms around this new change 558 00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:45,600 Speaker 4: of who you've got to be and what you've got 559 00:29:45,640 --> 00:29:47,479 Speaker 4: to do as a new mother or whatever it might be. 560 00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:50,040 Speaker 4: It's just a really clear identity change that I see 561 00:29:50,040 --> 00:29:50,400 Speaker 4: a lot. 562 00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:52,520 Speaker 3: Then it creates a whole lot. 563 00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:54,760 Speaker 4: Of confusion if I was this person and now I 564 00:29:54,800 --> 00:29:56,840 Speaker 4: can't be that person. But in fact, the essence of 565 00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:58,840 Speaker 4: who you are still there, and it's a matter of 566 00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:00,880 Speaker 4: just knowing that, and then you can apply it to 567 00:30:00,960 --> 00:30:04,880 Speaker 4: your next immediate purpose, which is now looking after a child, 568 00:30:04,880 --> 00:30:06,960 Speaker 4: which wasn't your purpose, you know, two years before. 569 00:30:07,960 --> 00:30:13,160 Speaker 1: That's so interesting. I think that we're always that, you know. 570 00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:16,320 Speaker 1: It's funny this which I. 571 00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:17,640 Speaker 2: Know exactly why you said it, because it gets said 572 00:30:17,680 --> 00:30:19,720 Speaker 2: all the time, whereas people go, I was that person 573 00:30:19,720 --> 00:30:22,800 Speaker 2: now and this person. No, you're the same person. You're 574 00:30:22,840 --> 00:30:27,600 Speaker 2: the same You're still you, You're still one hundred percent you. You're 575 00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:29,280 Speaker 2: just maybe have a different focus, you maybe have a 576 00:30:29,280 --> 00:30:33,640 Speaker 2: different reason you maybe have you know. But like I 577 00:30:33,680 --> 00:30:40,080 Speaker 2: think the idea of purpose is. I think it's important, 578 00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:42,840 Speaker 2: but I also think it's complicated and it's confused. 579 00:30:43,640 --> 00:30:46,160 Speaker 1: This is just a personal opinion. This is not research. 580 00:30:46,480 --> 00:30:50,600 Speaker 2: I think it's misrepresented because the idea of you know, 581 00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:52,200 Speaker 2: find your purpose, find your purpose. 582 00:30:52,560 --> 00:30:54,440 Speaker 1: I can watch your purpose like you're. 583 00:30:54,240 --> 00:30:57,960 Speaker 2: Going to find it under some mystical, magical, ethereal rock. 584 00:30:58,040 --> 00:31:00,480 Speaker 2: You're going to go, fuck hey everyone, And I've been 585 00:31:00,520 --> 00:31:04,640 Speaker 2: looking like a motherfucker. It's over here, behind this cave, 586 00:31:04,960 --> 00:31:10,640 Speaker 2: under this rock. Ye. Firstly, maybe you choose your purpose, right, 587 00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:13,440 Speaker 2: Maybe there's that, maybe you just go. And also maybe 588 00:31:13,480 --> 00:31:17,960 Speaker 2: you don't have a single purpose. Maybe maybe you don't 589 00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:23,000 Speaker 2: have one purpose. Maybe you live a really full, fucking 590 00:31:23,120 --> 00:31:26,240 Speaker 2: rich life with a bunch of different things that stimulate 591 00:31:26,320 --> 00:31:27,200 Speaker 2: you and light you up. 592 00:31:27,240 --> 00:31:30,000 Speaker 1: And also, by the way, Craig Harper. 593 00:31:29,760 --> 00:31:32,360 Speaker 2: Maybe your purpose when you're thirty five or thirty and 594 00:31:32,440 --> 00:31:34,600 Speaker 2: owning gyms and running around the gym floor like a 595 00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:38,840 Speaker 2: fucking idiot. Maybe maybe your purpose then isn't your purpose 596 00:31:38,880 --> 00:31:42,680 Speaker 2: now when you're sixty. Maybe maybe things evolve and changes, 597 00:31:42,760 --> 00:31:45,840 Speaker 2: You evolve and change, and you know, so I think 598 00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:51,400 Speaker 2: I think in our culture there's probably an unintentional but nonetheless. 599 00:31:50,880 --> 00:31:55,680 Speaker 1: A very real pressure on people to fucking discover their purpose. 600 00:31:55,800 --> 00:32:01,920 Speaker 4: By Tuesday Camp, Yeah, totally and completely, and that is 601 00:32:02,560 --> 00:32:06,040 Speaker 4: we have many purposes not only in this moment in 602 00:32:06,120 --> 00:32:09,240 Speaker 4: time right now, but also as things progress. 603 00:32:09,600 --> 00:32:12,920 Speaker 3: What can be helpful is that if you've got essential 604 00:32:13,040 --> 00:32:14,360 Speaker 3: theme that. 605 00:32:14,360 --> 00:32:17,480 Speaker 4: Feels really, really good, and this is where I believe 606 00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:21,440 Speaker 4: that there's a co creation that goes on. There's natural 607 00:32:21,480 --> 00:32:25,280 Speaker 4: gifts that you're imbued with, there's also your conscious choice 608 00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:29,240 Speaker 4: that you have, and generally you'll find yourself doing something. 609 00:32:29,320 --> 00:32:32,240 Speaker 4: If you're feeling very, very purposeful, you will find yourself 610 00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:34,480 Speaker 4: doing something that is aligned with your natural gifts, which 611 00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:39,040 Speaker 4: you had no choice in, but also feels intellectually and 612 00:32:39,080 --> 00:32:42,360 Speaker 4: philosophically right to you. And there's a co creation of 613 00:32:42,400 --> 00:32:45,520 Speaker 4: your nature and your nurture at the same time. And 614 00:32:46,680 --> 00:32:50,880 Speaker 4: to the point of the multiple purposes that you think about, 615 00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:55,840 Speaker 4: if we're trying to find that physiology of attention with 616 00:32:56,040 --> 00:33:01,600 Speaker 4: calm and low stress, if you are at home and 617 00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:05,280 Speaker 4: trying to work and you've got five kids running around 618 00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:08,160 Speaker 4: that desperately want your attention and you also want to 619 00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:11,080 Speaker 4: be a great parent and an attentive parent, working at 620 00:33:11,120 --> 00:33:15,040 Speaker 4: home is incredibly stressful and it's not productive. You're not 621 00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:18,120 Speaker 4: going to be in flow your purpose right then and there, 622 00:33:18,640 --> 00:33:19,960 Speaker 4: you're not fulfilling. 623 00:33:19,560 --> 00:33:20,440 Speaker 3: It by. 624 00:33:22,080 --> 00:33:25,320 Speaker 4: Attending to your children, and that takes that tension away, 625 00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:29,479 Speaker 4: that leans into obviously something that you've co created that 626 00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:32,480 Speaker 4: exists these children, and also your natural want to be 627 00:33:32,520 --> 00:33:33,000 Speaker 4: there and the. 628 00:33:32,920 --> 00:33:34,520 Speaker 3: Hormones that are related to that as well. 629 00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:37,040 Speaker 4: By you attending to your children and you know, lifting 630 00:33:37,040 --> 00:33:39,240 Speaker 4: them up and creating a great foundation for them of love, 631 00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:42,440 Speaker 4: whatever it might be in that moment, that's incredibly purposeful, 632 00:33:42,440 --> 00:33:44,560 Speaker 4: and your body will show that in its physiology. 633 00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:45,760 Speaker 3: I actually feel better. 634 00:33:45,760 --> 00:33:47,960 Speaker 4: Looking after my kids than I do trying to be 635 00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:50,440 Speaker 4: distracted looking after them doing work. Whereas when you go 636 00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:54,520 Speaker 4: to work, you know you're not running around padding people 637 00:33:54,560 --> 00:33:56,239 Speaker 4: on the back, I mean you could or you know, 638 00:33:56,280 --> 00:33:58,320 Speaker 4: giving kisses and telling them much you love. Like you 639 00:33:58,320 --> 00:33:59,880 Speaker 4: want to get into your office or you want to 640 00:33:59,880 --> 00:34:01,560 Speaker 4: get into your space, and you want to be as 641 00:34:01,560 --> 00:34:04,680 Speaker 4: productive and as useful as possible and moving towards the 642 00:34:04,720 --> 00:34:07,600 Speaker 4: outcomes that you're looking for in your job. In that 643 00:34:07,840 --> 00:34:11,520 Speaker 4: your immediate purpose in that moment is not your kids. 644 00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:13,800 Speaker 4: In fact, your kids will be a distraction once again 645 00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:17,200 Speaker 4: and work is now the priority. If you go to 646 00:34:17,239 --> 00:34:20,360 Speaker 4: the beach, you know your purpose shifts once again. 647 00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:23,520 Speaker 3: And I guess there's a the way that I like 648 00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:24,040 Speaker 3: to think of it. 649 00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:26,560 Speaker 4: And again this is in part stuff that I've read 650 00:34:26,560 --> 00:34:28,040 Speaker 4: and in part of the things that I agree with, 651 00:34:28,440 --> 00:34:34,359 Speaker 4: and that is goals in cement plans, in sands's if 652 00:34:34,400 --> 00:34:37,240 Speaker 4: you get a sense, a persistent sense of the type 653 00:34:37,239 --> 00:34:38,839 Speaker 4: of thing that you want to show up for, and 654 00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:41,920 Speaker 4: normally it's quite broad like for me, I want to 655 00:34:42,000 --> 00:34:45,920 Speaker 4: inspire elevation. I want people to know themselves better and 656 00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:46,840 Speaker 4: live their potential. 657 00:34:46,920 --> 00:34:51,720 Speaker 3: And so that is my central theme, which has changed 658 00:34:51,719 --> 00:34:52,280 Speaker 3: a few. 659 00:34:52,080 --> 00:34:54,160 Speaker 4: Times over the years, and as I've grown and as 660 00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:58,319 Speaker 4: I've developed and understood more, and then I'm acting on 661 00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:01,440 Speaker 4: that purpose in a different way with my kids, in 662 00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:03,440 Speaker 4: a different way with my work, and I'm not perfect 663 00:35:03,480 --> 00:35:05,960 Speaker 4: with it, of course, but in a different way with 664 00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:09,160 Speaker 4: my team, in a different way with our clients. It's 665 00:35:09,600 --> 00:35:13,360 Speaker 4: the way that I show up is constantly changing, but 666 00:35:13,440 --> 00:35:15,920 Speaker 4: it has a central theme, a central governing sense that 667 00:35:16,360 --> 00:35:20,280 Speaker 4: allows me to have a north star. And so everybody's 668 00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:22,239 Speaker 4: going to have a different interpretation of that. But even 669 00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:25,799 Speaker 4: just probably a huge thing that I'm a thing that 670 00:35:25,840 --> 00:35:28,440 Speaker 4: I'm finding is so relieving to people is that your 671 00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:31,719 Speaker 4: your purpose is allowed to change, so you might have 672 00:35:31,719 --> 00:35:34,040 Speaker 4: a purpose that's our data, they're not inspiring you anymore, 673 00:35:34,080 --> 00:35:35,520 Speaker 4: and you might just be sticking to it, thinking this 674 00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:38,480 Speaker 4: is what I've got to do, when in fact you 675 00:35:38,520 --> 00:35:41,359 Speaker 4: have aged, you have grown, you have seen different things. 676 00:35:41,360 --> 00:35:43,520 Speaker 4: There are more things that are present in your life now, 677 00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:47,399 Speaker 4: and as a result, your purpose must change in order 678 00:35:47,400 --> 00:35:49,719 Speaker 4: for you to get that same sensation of I'm on 679 00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:52,239 Speaker 4: track and this is where one more thing, mate, I 680 00:35:52,320 --> 00:35:53,279 Speaker 4: know I'm going on. 681 00:35:53,360 --> 00:35:55,279 Speaker 3: But there is. 682 00:35:56,760 --> 00:35:59,359 Speaker 4: This idea that even if you don't like what I 683 00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:01,640 Speaker 4: love is the commonversation for people that don't believe that 684 00:36:01,680 --> 00:36:07,480 Speaker 4: there's a purpose, You don't need a purpose, or it's 685 00:36:07,520 --> 00:36:09,919 Speaker 4: not important, whatever it might be, and it actually doesn't matter. 686 00:36:10,840 --> 00:36:12,920 Speaker 4: It doesn't matter what your beliefs are. If you have 687 00:36:13,000 --> 00:36:20,040 Speaker 4: the physiology of focus, calm, focus, with motivation, drive and 688 00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:25,040 Speaker 4: low stress levels, then you're on purpose and you'll also 689 00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:27,960 Speaker 4: it will also mean that you recover better overnight. And 690 00:36:28,239 --> 00:36:30,120 Speaker 4: I mean to make it simple, you'll live a longer 691 00:36:30,120 --> 00:36:31,879 Speaker 4: and happier life because your sleep will be better, your 692 00:36:31,880 --> 00:36:34,560 Speaker 4: digestion will be better, your recovery will be better because 693 00:36:34,600 --> 00:36:37,040 Speaker 4: you've got the physiology that's not as stressed. Whereas if 694 00:36:37,040 --> 00:36:40,200 Speaker 4: you're not on purpose and you only need to be 695 00:36:40,360 --> 00:36:43,840 Speaker 4: in a relationship that's a little bit misaligned to experience. 696 00:36:43,400 --> 00:36:43,920 Speaker 3: What this is. 697 00:36:44,360 --> 00:36:46,680 Speaker 4: If you're not on purpose, you don't sleep as well, 698 00:36:46,719 --> 00:36:48,719 Speaker 4: you don't eat as well, you don't move as well, 699 00:36:48,760 --> 00:36:51,520 Speaker 4: you don't recover as well. Things don't feel as easy, 700 00:36:51,560 --> 00:36:55,680 Speaker 4: things feel more tiring. And that is a way crap 701 00:36:55,719 --> 00:36:59,760 Speaker 4: a version of life. So whatever gets you into that space, 702 00:37:00,840 --> 00:37:04,440 Speaker 4: I feel like I was built for this moment that 703 00:37:04,760 --> 00:37:07,120 Speaker 4: if you can strive for that in whatever that looks like, 704 00:37:07,480 --> 00:37:08,600 Speaker 4: and it's different for everybody. 705 00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:08,879 Speaker 3: Something. 706 00:37:09,120 --> 00:37:11,960 Speaker 4: And I was sitting with some school teachers the other 707 00:37:12,040 --> 00:37:15,120 Speaker 4: day and we've done their biological assessment. One of them 708 00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:19,160 Speaker 4: hyper oxytocin sensitive, so everything is about socializing. 709 00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:22,920 Speaker 3: And another individual she was virtually the opposite to that, 710 00:37:24,239 --> 00:37:27,400 Speaker 3: very introverted, and we were talking about when of you 711 00:37:27,480 --> 00:37:32,759 Speaker 3: felt purposeful in the last little while, and the introverted. 712 00:37:32,239 --> 00:37:35,080 Speaker 4: Person says, I was reading my book and then I 713 00:37:35,120 --> 00:37:37,640 Speaker 4: did some coding by myself in a dark room by 714 00:37:37,640 --> 00:37:40,120 Speaker 4: about seven hours or for about seven hours, just really 715 00:37:40,239 --> 00:37:43,000 Speaker 4: enjoying my and just that intellectual stimulation of doing. 716 00:37:42,800 --> 00:37:43,400 Speaker 3: My own work. 717 00:37:43,800 --> 00:37:46,200 Speaker 4: And I was like, that's amazing, Like what an incredible flow. 718 00:37:46,239 --> 00:37:49,200 Speaker 4: She was describing the calm, focused, low strands. And then 719 00:37:49,800 --> 00:37:52,719 Speaker 4: the very super social person with the oxytocin variat got 720 00:37:52,719 --> 00:37:57,920 Speaker 4: in and she said, oh yeah, we were like playing games. 721 00:37:57,560 --> 00:37:58,040 Speaker 3: With the kids. 722 00:37:58,040 --> 00:38:00,360 Speaker 4: We were doing like a new game every five minutes, 723 00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:03,360 Speaker 4: Like all of the kids were going absolutely nuts making 724 00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:05,200 Speaker 4: all of this noise, and we were just in there 725 00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:08,560 Speaker 4: having a great time with them. I felt completely inflow. 726 00:38:09,040 --> 00:38:11,920 Speaker 4: I felt completely purposeful, like I was built for this moment. 727 00:38:12,320 --> 00:38:15,719 Speaker 4: And so just whatever that is to you. And this 728 00:38:15,760 --> 00:38:18,080 Speaker 4: is where you know, we now have a lot more 729 00:38:18,120 --> 00:38:20,160 Speaker 4: science that helps us understand this so that you can 730 00:38:20,480 --> 00:38:22,719 Speaker 4: navigate to the biology of this a lot faster. But 731 00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:26,279 Speaker 4: think about those times in your life where you have 732 00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:29,279 Speaker 4: been like I was made for this moment right here, 733 00:38:29,960 --> 00:38:32,800 Speaker 4: and they're a nice thing to reflect on, the stepping 734 00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:36,000 Speaker 4: stones to get to, well, what could be creating that 735 00:38:36,120 --> 00:38:38,360 Speaker 4: sensation for me right now? Because that right there is 736 00:38:38,640 --> 00:38:40,520 Speaker 4: that's life like, that is what we are here for. 737 00:38:40,600 --> 00:38:42,799 Speaker 4: That's what our capacity, our potential is here for. 738 00:38:43,239 --> 00:38:44,239 Speaker 3: To just feel. 739 00:38:44,040 --> 00:38:47,560 Speaker 4: Incredibly rewarded living the moment that we're in. 740 00:38:47,920 --> 00:38:49,040 Speaker 3: That's what it's all about. 741 00:38:49,800 --> 00:38:52,040 Speaker 1: You don't get excited about this stuff enough, you need 742 00:38:52,040 --> 00:38:52,680 Speaker 1: to put it up. 743 00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:55,719 Speaker 4: I'm just dragging myself outside. 744 00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:59,520 Speaker 2: You need hard you know, I was thinking about as 745 00:38:59,560 --> 00:39:03,319 Speaker 2: you were talking about, you know, how different we all 746 00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:05,759 Speaker 2: are and how we need different things and respond to 747 00:39:05,880 --> 00:39:08,879 Speaker 2: different or the same thing in different. 748 00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:09,560 Speaker 1: Ways, and blah blah blah. 749 00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:13,920 Speaker 2: Like a really good example of this, which I'm sure 750 00:39:14,600 --> 00:39:19,520 Speaker 2: you've experienced, this is as a speaker. Most people who 751 00:39:19,600 --> 00:39:23,960 Speaker 2: aren't speakers, which is most people you don't, you wouldn't 752 00:39:23,960 --> 00:39:26,960 Speaker 2: think much that you can be up saying something to 753 00:39:27,040 --> 00:39:30,920 Speaker 2: a group. And because I've done it so much and 754 00:39:30,960 --> 00:39:33,000 Speaker 2: I'm in front of so many groups, I've done it 755 00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:35,960 Speaker 2: for forty years and I've read rooms pretty I still 756 00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:37,680 Speaker 2: fuck up. I still have good and bad days, but 757 00:39:37,719 --> 00:39:40,400 Speaker 2: for the most part, it's somewhere between not bad and 758 00:39:40,440 --> 00:39:43,239 Speaker 2: pretty good most of the time. Right So, and I'm 759 00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:47,719 Speaker 2: very interactive and I'm way more fucking organic and freestyle 760 00:39:47,760 --> 00:39:50,400 Speaker 2: than most presenters. I don't have slides, I don't have graphs, 761 00:39:50,600 --> 00:39:53,560 Speaker 2: not that there's anything wrong with that. But what's interesting 762 00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:56,400 Speaker 2: is sometimes I look out and I could tell I 763 00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:59,959 Speaker 2: can go that dude fucking loves me, and that laid 764 00:40:00,040 --> 00:40:03,919 Speaker 2: your next team fucking hates me, and that one next 765 00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:09,000 Speaker 2: day she thinks I'm hilarious. The next one's confused, you know, 766 00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:12,120 Speaker 2: And you can just tell that on the same day, 767 00:40:12,160 --> 00:40:14,440 Speaker 2: in the same room, shit, the same guy with the 768 00:40:14,480 --> 00:40:18,640 Speaker 2: same intention, the same energy, sharing the same message. So 769 00:40:18,719 --> 00:40:24,920 Speaker 2: everyone's got the same inbound stimulus, right kind of. But 770 00:40:25,160 --> 00:40:29,399 Speaker 2: there are so many different experiences being had and you're like, yeah, 771 00:40:29,440 --> 00:40:32,640 Speaker 2: this is how it works, and I can almost I 772 00:40:32,680 --> 00:40:35,439 Speaker 2: can you know sometimes ago that lady up the back 773 00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:37,920 Speaker 2: of that dude, they're gonna they have a problem with me. 774 00:40:38,040 --> 00:40:40,319 Speaker 2: And then sometimes you'll just see him walking up to 775 00:40:40,360 --> 00:40:42,319 Speaker 2: you at the end and you're like, here we go, 776 00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:42,920 Speaker 2: here we go. 777 00:40:43,440 --> 00:40:44,600 Speaker 1: You know, it's okay. 778 00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:49,759 Speaker 2: It's like that's literally that's the reality, you know, that 779 00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:52,320 Speaker 2: is you are. It's like you you've got a team, 780 00:40:52,360 --> 00:40:56,120 Speaker 2: You've got staff. Like I don't know about you, but 781 00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:59,880 Speaker 2: for me, I employed hundreds and hundreds of people, and 782 00:41:00,719 --> 00:41:04,439 Speaker 2: there would be certain staff members God bless them. There 783 00:41:04,600 --> 00:41:07,319 Speaker 2: might be in a like a gym where I've got 784 00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:11,319 Speaker 2: forty staff, there might be three staff members that take 785 00:41:11,480 --> 00:41:14,360 Speaker 2: ninety percent of my energy and the other thirty seven 786 00:41:14,840 --> 00:41:19,319 Speaker 2: take ten. Yeah, and it's like that consistently, you know, 787 00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:23,680 Speaker 2: So that like when you were saying purpose changes and 788 00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:25,840 Speaker 2: I was thinking of a couple of other things. 789 00:41:26,960 --> 00:41:27,520 Speaker 1: Is that one. 790 00:41:29,320 --> 00:41:34,560 Speaker 2: It's okay, Like uncertainty is okay, Like we are so 791 00:41:34,719 --> 00:41:36,879 Speaker 2: addicted to We've got to know, we've got to be right, 792 00:41:36,920 --> 00:41:38,680 Speaker 2: We've got to be certain. Things have got to be 793 00:41:38,760 --> 00:41:41,759 Speaker 2: familiar things. I've got to be. No, it doesn't have 794 00:41:41,840 --> 00:41:44,719 Speaker 2: to be. Here's an idea, just try this. I don't know, 795 00:41:45,440 --> 00:41:49,359 Speaker 2: Like I don't know, and it's okay, what do you think? 796 00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:52,319 Speaker 2: I don't know because we feel so compelled to look 797 00:41:52,360 --> 00:41:56,080 Speaker 2: fucking smart. I've so many times going, look, I could 798 00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:58,000 Speaker 2: make something up, but I actually don't know. 799 00:41:58,080 --> 00:41:59,880 Speaker 1: So I'm just going to go with I don't know. 800 00:42:00,520 --> 00:42:03,080 Speaker 1: And also, here's another one. Here's a good et. I 801 00:42:03,280 --> 00:42:06,879 Speaker 1: was wrong, just fucked it up. 802 00:42:07,160 --> 00:42:11,680 Speaker 3: I was wrong. There was some strange combination of words. 803 00:42:11,680 --> 00:42:13,120 Speaker 3: You just mentioned what there was the three of them. 804 00:42:13,800 --> 00:42:16,560 Speaker 3: Iand I know, I know. 805 00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:19,400 Speaker 2: It's I know it's fucking weird, but you know, And 806 00:42:19,440 --> 00:42:21,880 Speaker 2: the thing is that I would be a moron, and 807 00:42:21,920 --> 00:42:24,080 Speaker 2: I would be the most arrogant man on earth to 808 00:42:24,800 --> 00:42:28,799 Speaker 2: think that I'm not currently getting things wrong, because I've 809 00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:32,799 Speaker 2: always got something wrong. Not all the things all the time, right, 810 00:42:33,200 --> 00:42:35,719 Speaker 2: but I have Yes, I've had some wins and I've 811 00:42:35,719 --> 00:42:38,480 Speaker 2: got some things right. But if I speak to the 812 00:42:38,520 --> 00:42:41,440 Speaker 2: guys doing a PhD and self awareness, if I'm not 813 00:42:41,560 --> 00:42:45,760 Speaker 2: saying right now, more than likely I'm getting several things 814 00:42:45,800 --> 00:42:49,160 Speaker 2: wrong in some way, and moving forward, I will continue 815 00:42:49,200 --> 00:42:51,319 Speaker 2: to fuck up. I'll also try to grow and learn 816 00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:54,520 Speaker 2: and evolve and serve people. But will I get things wrong? 817 00:42:54,560 --> 00:42:56,719 Speaker 2: Will I operate an ego? Will I fuck up? 818 00:42:56,840 --> 00:43:00,520 Speaker 1: Yes? I will like that. Just to me, that just 819 00:43:00,600 --> 00:43:02,120 Speaker 1: takes a bit of pressure. 820 00:43:01,760 --> 00:43:06,000 Speaker 4: Off totally and probably one of the best lessons that 821 00:43:06,080 --> 00:43:09,719 Speaker 4: a really powerful mentor gave to me. He's still my 822 00:43:10,440 --> 00:43:13,480 Speaker 4: chief mentor is. I don't know if I'll ever outgrown him. Actually, 823 00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:19,719 Speaker 4: he is an incredible man. He it's that when you 824 00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:24,759 Speaker 4: don't know, you will still feel something and you'll still 825 00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:27,440 Speaker 4: have thoughts on it, and you'll still have a belief 826 00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:31,880 Speaker 4: about something. And what's really helped is because we don't 827 00:43:31,920 --> 00:43:34,319 Speaker 4: truly know, Like even if you think you know, you 828 00:43:34,400 --> 00:43:36,480 Speaker 4: don't know, because anything could happen. 829 00:43:38,480 --> 00:43:41,479 Speaker 3: There can be a sense of knowing in your body 830 00:43:41,520 --> 00:43:42,000 Speaker 3: if you allow. 831 00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:44,120 Speaker 4: And the way that he explained it was like if 832 00:43:44,120 --> 00:43:46,840 Speaker 4: you've got traffic lights that are saying go and stop 833 00:43:47,840 --> 00:43:50,840 Speaker 4: on some decisions, you'll have a couple of amber lights, 834 00:43:50,840 --> 00:43:53,400 Speaker 4: a green light and a hard red light, you know, 835 00:43:53,719 --> 00:43:55,680 Speaker 4: and then on other decisions you'll go, you know what, 836 00:43:56,040 --> 00:43:58,839 Speaker 4: everything's green on that I'm going to do it. And 837 00:43:58,840 --> 00:44:02,160 Speaker 4: that's been a really really powerful exercise for me to say, well, 838 00:44:02,200 --> 00:44:04,560 Speaker 4: I don't know what's ultimately going to happen, but if 839 00:44:04,600 --> 00:44:08,520 Speaker 4: I was, And it encourages you to actually tap into 840 00:44:08,640 --> 00:44:12,399 Speaker 4: an intuition, tap into your deeper feelings, tap into what 841 00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:14,799 Speaker 4: you might what might be best for you to say, 842 00:44:14,840 --> 00:44:17,400 Speaker 4: if I was to do this, do I feel aligned 843 00:44:17,400 --> 00:44:19,560 Speaker 4: with you know? Does it it doesn't make sense? 844 00:44:19,840 --> 00:44:21,319 Speaker 3: Yes? Does it feel good? 845 00:44:21,480 --> 00:44:21,680 Speaker 4: Yes? 846 00:44:22,000 --> 00:44:22,279 Speaker 3: Is it? 847 00:44:22,640 --> 00:44:24,719 Speaker 4: Do I think it's it's right for the people around me? 848 00:44:24,880 --> 00:44:26,799 Speaker 4: It's like green light, green light, green light. 849 00:44:26,840 --> 00:44:29,280 Speaker 3: Well, that that's good. That's as good as it gets, 850 00:44:29,320 --> 00:44:33,360 Speaker 3: like as far as knowing and confidence becomes. That is it? 851 00:44:33,440 --> 00:44:35,880 Speaker 3: But then what's so fascinating about that self awareness? 852 00:44:35,880 --> 00:44:39,359 Speaker 4: And we haven't touched on it just because it's pend 853 00:44:39,880 --> 00:44:42,920 Speaker 4: I mean, not for any particular reason. But you might 854 00:44:42,960 --> 00:44:46,400 Speaker 4: have a fear from your childhood or the last relationship 855 00:44:46,400 --> 00:44:51,600 Speaker 4: that you had that creates an amber or a red and. 856 00:44:50,640 --> 00:44:54,440 Speaker 3: This is where it's only in that quieter space. 857 00:44:55,120 --> 00:44:58,800 Speaker 4: It's only in that state of where where you feel connected, 858 00:44:58,840 --> 00:45:02,240 Speaker 4: where you feel loved, where you feel purposeful, that often 859 00:45:02,280 --> 00:45:04,879 Speaker 4: you can start to separate out what is fear from 860 00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:08,160 Speaker 4: before and what is actually real and you know it's 861 00:45:08,640 --> 00:45:13,279 Speaker 4: it's it's you can't undo trauma with additional stress. You've 862 00:45:13,320 --> 00:45:14,959 Speaker 4: actually you've got to be in a space of love. 863 00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:16,399 Speaker 4: You've got to be in a space of calm. You've 864 00:45:16,400 --> 00:45:17,600 Speaker 4: got to be a space of connection. 865 00:45:17,719 --> 00:45:18,000 Speaker 3: And so. 866 00:45:19,480 --> 00:45:21,400 Speaker 4: I didn't expect to say this by the end of 867 00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:26,680 Speaker 4: this little paragraph, but this is the importance of having 868 00:45:26,880 --> 00:45:31,319 Speaker 4: a routine of where you're connecting with yourself, not to 869 00:45:31,360 --> 00:45:35,080 Speaker 4: fix a problem, not to necessarily be focused on your purpose, 870 00:45:35,120 --> 00:45:38,680 Speaker 4: but the ten minutes of deep breathing to understand your 871 00:45:38,719 --> 00:45:42,640 Speaker 4: internal world, to navigate what those those feelings are, so 872 00:45:42,719 --> 00:45:44,600 Speaker 4: that when you actually do need to call upon them, 873 00:45:44,800 --> 00:45:47,880 Speaker 4: you've got a familiarity. It's just mindfulness is just a muscle, 874 00:45:48,239 --> 00:45:50,960 Speaker 4: and that when it comes to purpose, it's this is 875 00:45:51,239 --> 00:45:52,880 Speaker 4: a feeling that is unique to you. 876 00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:54,400 Speaker 1: That is. 877 00:45:56,680 --> 00:46:00,759 Speaker 4: That that someone else can't instruct you to. It's got 878 00:46:00,800 --> 00:46:02,560 Speaker 4: to be something that you feel out for yourself. And 879 00:46:02,600 --> 00:46:04,600 Speaker 4: the pathway to that is actually connecting. This is what 880 00:46:04,680 --> 00:46:08,680 Speaker 4: I'm because there is a vast lack of this education 881 00:46:08,880 --> 00:46:12,680 Speaker 4: in schools right now, and it's this this term I'm 882 00:46:12,719 --> 00:46:15,280 Speaker 4: actually really really We're going to be building in mindful 883 00:46:15,360 --> 00:46:18,520 Speaker 4: routines into part of the research progra that we're doing, 884 00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:21,239 Speaker 4: so five year old kids will have their personalized mindfulness 885 00:46:21,320 --> 00:46:23,800 Speaker 4: routine before they start school. But that this is the 886 00:46:24,640 --> 00:46:26,279 Speaker 4: this is where it needs to be because it's that 887 00:46:26,440 --> 00:46:29,880 Speaker 4: internal sense of knowing that you can have confidence and 888 00:46:29,920 --> 00:46:33,040 Speaker 4: you say, you know what, I don't know, but it 889 00:46:33,120 --> 00:46:36,880 Speaker 4: feels and thinks and looks like green lights, so let's see. 890 00:46:37,040 --> 00:46:39,759 Speaker 4: And then it's you know, it's the moving forward without 891 00:46:39,800 --> 00:46:42,319 Speaker 4: expectation of result, but just giving it your best and 892 00:46:42,320 --> 00:46:43,480 Speaker 4: seeing what happens. 893 00:46:43,760 --> 00:46:45,400 Speaker 1: Yeah. 894 00:46:45,480 --> 00:46:49,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think I think for some people that 895 00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:56,000 Speaker 2: that vulnerability, that vulnerability of being okay with being wrong, 896 00:46:56,640 --> 00:46:59,960 Speaker 2: and especially when as we were talking about before with Ida, 897 00:47:00,400 --> 00:47:03,960 Speaker 2: especially when your identity is tied in with some a 898 00:47:04,000 --> 00:47:07,480 Speaker 2: certain thing being a certain way, then you find, you know, 899 00:47:07,640 --> 00:47:11,960 Speaker 2: like religious stuff is an easy example, just because you know, 900 00:47:12,160 --> 00:47:15,279 Speaker 2: I grew up or whatever, we grew up in this 901 00:47:15,360 --> 00:47:18,960 Speaker 2: theology or this doctrine or this philosophy, and we know 902 00:47:19,040 --> 00:47:21,040 Speaker 2: we are this or that you know, we are the 903 00:47:21,040 --> 00:47:24,560 Speaker 2: one true hotline to God or whatever the you know. 904 00:47:24,640 --> 00:47:27,000 Speaker 2: And when you take out the religion and the theology 905 00:47:27,040 --> 00:47:29,680 Speaker 2: and you just think about it from a cognitive point 906 00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:33,680 Speaker 2: of view or a metacognitive point of view, Oh, we 907 00:47:33,920 --> 00:47:37,440 Speaker 2: think this way. I think this way because Mum and 908 00:47:37,520 --> 00:47:40,520 Speaker 2: Dad think this way, and Uncle John and Arnie Marge 909 00:47:40,560 --> 00:47:43,880 Speaker 2: think this way, and the pastor thinks this and all 910 00:47:43,960 --> 00:47:47,080 Speaker 2: the people in my world think this way. So I 911 00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:50,640 Speaker 2: haven't actually been taught how to think. I've been told 912 00:47:50,800 --> 00:47:54,279 Speaker 2: what to think, and now I think that. And so 913 00:47:54,840 --> 00:47:58,360 Speaker 2: this when I get to the end of my programming, 914 00:47:59,400 --> 00:48:03,880 Speaker 2: and then I open a door into self awareness and consciousness, 915 00:48:03,960 --> 00:48:08,160 Speaker 2: Like this is the interesting Like where does my programming finish? 916 00:48:08,200 --> 00:48:12,440 Speaker 2: And where does my ability to think for purely for myself, 917 00:48:12,480 --> 00:48:15,359 Speaker 2: to think critically and whether or not what I think 918 00:48:15,480 --> 00:48:17,560 Speaker 2: aligns with those around me or not? 919 00:48:17,840 --> 00:48:19,000 Speaker 1: What do I think? 920 00:48:19,640 --> 00:48:23,360 Speaker 2: And it's very fucking difficult to overcome your programming for 921 00:48:23,440 --> 00:48:26,279 Speaker 2: all of us, me included. Right, I haven't been to 922 00:48:26,360 --> 00:48:28,640 Speaker 2: church essentially for forty years, but I grew up in 923 00:48:28,680 --> 00:48:34,400 Speaker 2: a very very churchy life, and so there's still psychologe 924 00:48:34,440 --> 00:48:36,120 Speaker 2: and I'm not saying it was bad. It wasn't all 925 00:48:36,239 --> 00:48:38,719 Speaker 2: fucking terrible or anything, but there's this still there's this 926 00:48:38,840 --> 00:48:42,880 Speaker 2: residual where there are certain things that if I'm talking 927 00:48:42,880 --> 00:48:46,000 Speaker 2: about certain things a certain way, I feel this discomfort 928 00:48:46,120 --> 00:48:48,560 Speaker 2: or this guilt, and I'm like, oh, wow, that's interesting. 929 00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:52,520 Speaker 2: Forty years later, there's still shit I'm uncomfortable to say. 930 00:48:52,640 --> 00:48:55,600 Speaker 2: But just in case God smites me from the face 931 00:48:55,640 --> 00:48:59,160 Speaker 2: of the earth or something, you know, it's so interesting 932 00:48:59,320 --> 00:49:04,880 Speaker 2: to realize how much of that stuff lives on. Probably 933 00:49:04,960 --> 00:49:07,560 Speaker 2: you're going to tell me in ourselves, but it's fucking 934 00:49:08,239 --> 00:49:13,560 Speaker 2: and trying to trying to be I don't know if 935 00:49:13,560 --> 00:49:17,080 Speaker 2: the word is aware enough or courageous enough or curious 936 00:49:17,200 --> 00:49:21,919 Speaker 2: enough to go, look, maybe a lot of what I think, 937 00:49:22,000 --> 00:49:24,600 Speaker 2: or some of what I think is flawed or. 938 00:49:26,080 --> 00:49:27,760 Speaker 1: You know, somewhat flawed. 939 00:49:28,360 --> 00:49:32,279 Speaker 2: It's an interesting door to open because it opens It's 940 00:49:32,440 --> 00:49:36,239 Speaker 2: very hard to be objective when you believe that, or 941 00:49:36,280 --> 00:49:39,319 Speaker 2: open minded when you believe that you are already right. 942 00:49:39,560 --> 00:49:42,319 Speaker 2: So therefore anyone who doesn't agree or align with my 943 00:49:42,520 --> 00:49:46,920 Speaker 2: version of right is wrong. So now I've made myself unteachable. 944 00:49:47,600 --> 00:49:51,600 Speaker 2: Now I'm living in confirmation bias. The echo chamber of Craig. 945 00:49:52,320 --> 00:49:58,480 Speaker 4: Yeah, as you were. As you were talking there, I 946 00:49:58,520 --> 00:50:00,799 Speaker 4: was thinking about that. 947 00:50:01,800 --> 00:50:02,560 Speaker 3: Like to think of it. 948 00:50:03,280 --> 00:50:05,560 Speaker 4: The way that I've kind of or thought about this 949 00:50:05,840 --> 00:50:08,000 Speaker 4: and been supportive to think about this as well, is 950 00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:11,360 Speaker 4: the past experience that we have personally. I'll give an 951 00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:15,239 Speaker 4: example one person that's come through one of our health 952 00:50:15,280 --> 00:50:21,640 Speaker 4: professional courses, very fiery, direct type of individual, with very subdued, grounded, 953 00:50:21,760 --> 00:50:28,839 Speaker 4: steady parents and didn't realize that they'd been suppressing him 954 00:50:30,000 --> 00:50:32,719 Speaker 4: his whole life out of care and love, that we 955 00:50:32,840 --> 00:50:37,560 Speaker 4: need a grounded, quiet, calm, considered child because that's who 956 00:50:37,600 --> 00:50:37,960 Speaker 4: we are. 957 00:50:38,560 --> 00:50:43,080 Speaker 3: And then he has this complete realization moment, you. 958 00:50:43,080 --> 00:50:46,680 Speaker 4: Know, really only two years ago, by understanding his makeup 959 00:50:46,920 --> 00:50:52,200 Speaker 4: is actually fiery and freedom and taking chances and being impulsive, 960 00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:55,239 Speaker 4: and he's been living in this conflict and it's just 961 00:50:55,280 --> 00:50:58,120 Speaker 4: been building up and creating an incredible amount of stress 962 00:50:58,160 --> 00:51:03,200 Speaker 4: in his system. And the release of that was absolutely 963 00:51:03,280 --> 00:51:07,440 Speaker 4: crazy like, and the mid life crisis almost that followed 964 00:51:07,719 --> 00:51:09,520 Speaker 4: because it's like, well, I don't have the things that 965 00:51:09,560 --> 00:51:12,520 Speaker 4: I felt safe with anymore. Now I've actually I understand 966 00:51:12,520 --> 00:51:14,480 Speaker 4: myself and with that freedom comes a whole lot of 967 00:51:14,520 --> 00:51:18,200 Speaker 4: unknown and I'm not used to this new muscle that 968 00:51:18,239 --> 00:51:22,319 Speaker 4: I have, so that first the first thing is just 969 00:51:23,120 --> 00:51:27,520 Speaker 4: the most loving, well intended people. If they don't understand 970 00:51:27,560 --> 00:51:29,640 Speaker 4: your differences, they can be completely different to you, and 971 00:51:29,680 --> 00:51:30,640 Speaker 4: they projected onto you. 972 00:51:30,640 --> 00:51:31,920 Speaker 3: And this is what happens with kids. 973 00:51:32,960 --> 00:51:38,320 Speaker 4: And this is what's so exciting about working with schools, 974 00:51:38,600 --> 00:51:43,240 Speaker 4: and that is we are telling them to like, this 975 00:51:43,320 --> 00:51:47,840 Speaker 4: is this child, and when they explode, it needs to 976 00:51:48,040 --> 00:51:53,319 Speaker 4: in an indirect way, needs to be validated and celebrated 977 00:51:53,360 --> 00:51:55,840 Speaker 4: as to why they did that, rather than just you 978 00:51:55,920 --> 00:51:58,560 Speaker 4: are the wrong child and you've done the wrong thing 979 00:51:58,600 --> 00:52:01,560 Speaker 4: whatever it might be, which then creates this conflict in 980 00:52:01,560 --> 00:52:04,200 Speaker 4: them of like, oh, I did this thing that felt 981 00:52:04,280 --> 00:52:04,759 Speaker 4: natural to me. 982 00:52:04,800 --> 00:52:07,040 Speaker 3: I've been told that that's wrong. She's what's wrong with me? 983 00:52:07,160 --> 00:52:11,000 Speaker 4: Like this is the story that gets created rather being 984 00:52:11,000 --> 00:52:16,840 Speaker 4: around people that allow you to just that proactively encourage 985 00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:20,239 Speaker 4: you to be yourself. So I know that you are 986 00:52:20,320 --> 00:52:21,480 Speaker 4: a really quiet person. 987 00:52:21,600 --> 00:52:22,200 Speaker 3: Like my mum. 988 00:52:22,360 --> 00:52:25,759 Speaker 4: She's the introvert of introverts, and it's like, hey mum, 989 00:52:25,880 --> 00:52:27,600 Speaker 4: go take some time by yourself. 990 00:52:27,840 --> 00:52:29,600 Speaker 3: Hey mom, Like, go and have a lie theut. 991 00:52:29,600 --> 00:52:31,799 Speaker 4: Hey mom, go and get into a dark room where 992 00:52:31,800 --> 00:52:33,400 Speaker 4: you can just dull your senses down. 993 00:52:33,320 --> 00:52:36,680 Speaker 3: Like being encouraged to be yourself. There's another my niece 994 00:52:36,760 --> 00:52:38,720 Speaker 3: actually over over the weekend. 995 00:52:39,680 --> 00:52:43,120 Speaker 4: She just talks so much and so fast, and her 996 00:52:43,160 --> 00:52:46,840 Speaker 4: thinking is brilliant. She's really really sharp. She thinks about 997 00:52:46,840 --> 00:52:49,080 Speaker 4: things in the right way, but the way that she 998 00:52:49,200 --> 00:52:53,200 Speaker 4: says it really grinds on a number of family members 999 00:52:53,760 --> 00:52:56,759 Speaker 4: and just to tell her, Hey, what you're thinking is 1000 00:52:56,800 --> 00:52:59,600 Speaker 4: exactly right, and it's actually amazing what comes out of 1001 00:52:59,640 --> 00:53:02,319 Speaker 4: your mouth, because most of the time at school she's 1002 00:53:02,320 --> 00:53:04,160 Speaker 4: been told her you got to be quiet, like no 1003 00:53:04,200 --> 00:53:07,280 Speaker 4: one wants to hear right now, and so old. It's eleven, 1004 00:53:07,360 --> 00:53:11,840 Speaker 4: she's eleven, and so she's building this story of geez, 1005 00:53:11,960 --> 00:53:14,680 Speaker 4: I'm rambling, Like if someone lets her actually talk, she'll say, oh, 1006 00:53:14,960 --> 00:53:17,080 Speaker 4: I'm rambling now. I said no, no, no, this is good. 1007 00:53:17,200 --> 00:53:20,520 Speaker 4: But she's so used to being stifled. And so it's 1008 00:53:21,080 --> 00:53:24,440 Speaker 4: what would it be like? And it might seem even 1009 00:53:24,920 --> 00:53:29,200 Speaker 4: unrealistic for you to celebrate and support children that are 1010 00:53:29,239 --> 00:53:34,400 Speaker 4: acting poorly, for example, it might feel like unrealistic to 1011 00:53:34,480 --> 00:53:36,840 Speaker 4: do that. But what I would like everybody to reflect 1012 00:53:36,880 --> 00:53:39,640 Speaker 4: on is what would it feel like if or who 1013 00:53:39,719 --> 00:53:42,360 Speaker 4: is that person who just loves me? No matter what, 1014 00:53:43,200 --> 00:53:45,920 Speaker 4: I can just be the whatever kind of person that 1015 00:53:45,960 --> 00:53:47,440 Speaker 4: I want to be, and no matter what, they go, Oh, 1016 00:53:47,560 --> 00:53:50,000 Speaker 4: you're such a legend. Let's go get another champagne. Let's 1017 00:53:50,040 --> 00:53:52,640 Speaker 4: just this is just the best. I love when you 1018 00:53:52,640 --> 00:53:53,480 Speaker 4: get all fired up. 1019 00:53:53,520 --> 00:53:54,200 Speaker 3: This is the best. 1020 00:53:54,200 --> 00:53:54,400 Speaker 1: You know. 1021 00:53:54,520 --> 00:53:57,120 Speaker 3: Yeah, no, they are assholes. I totally agree with you. 1022 00:53:57,160 --> 00:53:58,359 Speaker 3: Give me a gimme a five. 1023 00:53:58,400 --> 00:54:02,360 Speaker 4: Whatever it might be, What is it like to be 1024 00:54:02,480 --> 00:54:06,319 Speaker 4: around that person, to have that level of support in 1025 00:54:06,360 --> 00:54:09,640 Speaker 4: who you are? And that's essentially everything that we're trying 1026 00:54:09,680 --> 00:54:15,919 Speaker 4: to do is help people be more informed about who 1027 00:54:15,960 --> 00:54:17,880 Speaker 4: you are, why you do the things that you might be, 1028 00:54:17,960 --> 00:54:20,120 Speaker 4: and how can I provide you the most amount of 1029 00:54:20,160 --> 00:54:23,480 Speaker 4: celebration just for being you. I don't know where I 1030 00:54:23,520 --> 00:54:26,640 Speaker 4: started all of this or where this began, but it's 1031 00:54:26,680 --> 00:54:30,960 Speaker 4: definitely like a really key message that we're driving into 1032 00:54:31,000 --> 00:54:32,680 Speaker 4: the world at the moment, and that is who you 1033 00:54:32,719 --> 00:54:35,840 Speaker 4: are is exactly right. And if you've got people around 1034 00:54:35,840 --> 00:54:39,239 Speaker 4: you that allow you to be you, it's amazing how 1035 00:54:39,320 --> 00:54:42,759 Speaker 4: you course correct naturally just because you're calmer and you 1036 00:54:43,000 --> 00:54:46,480 Speaker 4: coming out of stress and you're resolving things that may 1037 00:54:46,520 --> 00:54:48,680 Speaker 4: have happened in the past by being surrounded by that 1038 00:54:48,760 --> 00:54:54,440 Speaker 4: love as well. So this whole idea about identity and 1039 00:54:54,480 --> 00:54:57,680 Speaker 4: supporting people to be themselves, giving them the space to 1040 00:54:57,719 --> 00:54:59,799 Speaker 4: then find their purpose and use their natural strength. 1041 00:55:00,000 --> 00:55:01,280 Speaker 3: That's what it's all about. 1042 00:55:02,280 --> 00:55:04,880 Speaker 1: But we've come full circle. I love it. I love it. 1043 00:55:04,960 --> 00:55:07,239 Speaker 1: I don't know if you've heard of a book called 1044 00:55:08,120 --> 00:55:09,200 Speaker 1: called Bad Therapy. 1045 00:55:09,880 --> 00:55:14,359 Speaker 2: No. So, there's a lady called Abigail Shreier, I think 1046 00:55:14,360 --> 00:55:16,440 Speaker 2: that's her name. She wrote a book called Bad Therapy. 1047 00:55:16,920 --> 00:55:20,799 Speaker 2: Lots and lots of research, interviewed hundreds and hundreds of 1048 00:55:21,160 --> 00:55:22,760 Speaker 2: therapists and psychs. 1049 00:55:22,400 --> 00:55:24,080 Speaker 1: And blah blah blah blah blah. 1050 00:55:24,080 --> 00:55:28,000 Speaker 2: Anyway, that the takeaway from the book, the key takeaway 1051 00:55:28,080 --> 00:55:30,520 Speaker 2: is that for some people, talk therapy is brilliant, and 1052 00:55:30,560 --> 00:55:34,759 Speaker 2: for some people it's catastrophic. It's like everyone thinks that 1053 00:55:34,800 --> 00:55:37,319 Speaker 2: I am going to a psychologist or a therapist and 1054 00:55:37,440 --> 00:55:40,160 Speaker 2: talking about your shit. At the very least it will 1055 00:55:40,200 --> 00:55:43,479 Speaker 2: help a bit. And one of the outcomes of the book, 1056 00:55:43,640 --> 00:55:46,320 Speaker 2: or one of the revelations the book, is that no, actually, 1057 00:55:46,360 --> 00:55:49,799 Speaker 2: for some people rocking up every Tuesday a bough at 1058 00:55:49,840 --> 00:55:52,399 Speaker 2: three o'clock and talking about that thing that happened five 1059 00:55:52,480 --> 00:55:56,640 Speaker 2: years ago, it actually makes you worse because you just 1060 00:55:56,719 --> 00:56:00,160 Speaker 2: open the door on that trauma and you just get 1061 00:56:00,280 --> 00:56:03,000 Speaker 2: back into that and it takes them three four days 1062 00:56:03,040 --> 00:56:06,560 Speaker 2: to recover from a session, and they're not actually overall 1063 00:56:06,600 --> 00:56:09,279 Speaker 2: going forwards, they're going backwards. Which is not to say, 1064 00:56:09,360 --> 00:56:13,080 Speaker 2: don't misinterpret me, folks that talk therapy is bad, but 1065 00:56:13,160 --> 00:56:16,640 Speaker 2: for some people it ain't the answer. And I think 1066 00:56:16,680 --> 00:56:20,080 Speaker 2: this is back to our original thing is like something 1067 00:56:20,120 --> 00:56:23,880 Speaker 2: works for everyone, but not everything works for everyone. You know, 1068 00:56:24,040 --> 00:56:25,600 Speaker 2: find you something you know. 1069 00:56:26,960 --> 00:56:30,480 Speaker 4: One hundred percent. And some of the work that a 1070 00:56:30,520 --> 00:56:33,839 Speaker 4: couple of our psychics are doing in the moment is 1071 00:56:34,640 --> 00:56:38,280 Speaker 4: what kind of talk therapy is going to be best, 1072 00:56:38,360 --> 00:56:43,160 Speaker 4: because some individuals, even if they've gone really bad, need 1073 00:56:43,200 --> 00:56:46,680 Speaker 4: to be complimented, even if there've been an absolute asshole. 1074 00:56:47,080 --> 00:56:49,080 Speaker 4: They need to be told how great they are, and 1075 00:56:49,120 --> 00:56:53,640 Speaker 4: then that makes them come back into balance, whereas sitting 1076 00:56:53,640 --> 00:56:57,880 Speaker 4: in the criticism and getting their ego bashed makes them worse, 1077 00:56:58,120 --> 00:57:00,480 Speaker 4: makes them angry, makes them more frustrated, make some more 1078 00:57:00,520 --> 00:57:01,080 Speaker 4: shut down. 1079 00:57:01,160 --> 00:57:05,200 Speaker 3: But actually the therapy for them is just being told 1080 00:57:05,239 --> 00:57:05,799 Speaker 3: how great they are. 1081 00:57:05,880 --> 00:57:09,239 Speaker 4: Jeez, I love how you've thought about that. And let's 1082 00:57:09,360 --> 00:57:11,880 Speaker 4: let's think to the future. What are the things that 1083 00:57:11,920 --> 00:57:14,000 Speaker 4: we're going to approach in the future that we're going. 1084 00:57:13,920 --> 00:57:16,120 Speaker 3: To really make great. Let's not worry about the past 1085 00:57:16,160 --> 00:57:18,120 Speaker 3: at all. Let's actually just focus on the future. 1086 00:57:18,280 --> 00:57:21,160 Speaker 4: As other people really learn so much from going back 1087 00:57:21,160 --> 00:57:23,520 Speaker 4: into their past and they can process it and digest it. 1088 00:57:23,600 --> 00:57:25,439 Speaker 1: So I hear you. 1089 00:57:25,360 --> 00:57:30,600 Speaker 4: Completely and even you know, some more enlightened sychs actually 1090 00:57:30,600 --> 00:57:33,480 Speaker 4: go out and they do walking talkies where they know 1091 00:57:33,520 --> 00:57:36,960 Speaker 4: they've got somebody who's more mindful or more more mobile, 1092 00:57:37,560 --> 00:57:40,760 Speaker 4: and they love the idea of moving, and so they 1093 00:57:40,800 --> 00:57:44,800 Speaker 4: get them to move their body while they're talking. And 1094 00:57:44,840 --> 00:57:48,120 Speaker 4: it's interesting. My son is exactly that. He's a talker 1095 00:57:48,200 --> 00:57:50,200 Speaker 4: and a walker. And if we're sitting in a car, 1096 00:57:50,360 --> 00:57:52,400 Speaker 4: I'll say, hey, mate, let's talk about that, because I 1097 00:57:52,440 --> 00:57:55,120 Speaker 4: know that it's important for him to talk about stuff. 1098 00:57:54,880 --> 00:57:55,560 Speaker 3: To get off his chest. 1099 00:57:55,600 --> 00:57:57,560 Speaker 4: Otherwise he broods on it and he does feel better. 1100 00:57:58,400 --> 00:58:01,960 Speaker 4: If we're going for a walk, he'll start naturally talking wow. 1101 00:58:02,040 --> 00:58:04,880 Speaker 4: But it's sitting still, it doesn't do it. And there's 1102 00:58:04,960 --> 00:58:09,360 Speaker 4: some individuals with their brain are more geared to they 1103 00:58:09,440 --> 00:58:14,560 Speaker 4: process all information through their movement center and so they 1104 00:58:14,640 --> 00:58:17,720 Speaker 4: take in information and then they want to move and 1105 00:58:17,760 --> 00:58:19,880 Speaker 4: if they're having to then sit still. It's just like 1106 00:58:20,040 --> 00:58:23,880 Speaker 4: stifling their response to things, whereas other individuals to move 1107 00:58:23,920 --> 00:58:25,800 Speaker 4: and walk at the to move and talk at the 1108 00:58:25,840 --> 00:58:28,160 Speaker 4: same time as a complete distraction. So I hear you 1109 00:58:28,200 --> 00:58:31,840 Speaker 4: completely and the depths of that are absolutely fascinating. 1110 00:58:31,880 --> 00:58:35,320 Speaker 3: So anyway, it's it's been a wonderful talk with you. 1111 00:58:36,200 --> 00:58:38,520 Speaker 1: I mate, I think you're getting better. I think you're 1112 00:58:38,520 --> 00:58:40,240 Speaker 1: fucking getting better as you get older. 1113 00:58:42,000 --> 00:58:44,680 Speaker 4: You've got to give you enough time. It's eighteen months 1114 00:58:44,720 --> 00:58:46,160 Speaker 4: to get some new material, that's all. 1115 00:58:46,240 --> 00:58:46,560 Speaker 1: Oh, I know. 1116 00:58:46,680 --> 00:58:48,600 Speaker 2: We've definitely got to get you back quicker than that. 1117 00:58:48,680 --> 00:58:53,880 Speaker 2: Or if you're available, tel point our listeners to your 1118 00:58:53,920 --> 00:58:57,520 Speaker 2: resources and yeah, let them know how they can connect 1119 00:58:57,520 --> 00:58:59,240 Speaker 2: with you and get involved. 1120 00:58:59,680 --> 00:59:00,400 Speaker 3: Yeah, thank you. 1121 00:59:01,320 --> 00:59:04,200 Speaker 4: So a part of the Shay Group and the Shay 1122 00:59:04,240 --> 00:59:07,560 Speaker 4: Group we're an organization. They're looking to eliminate chronic disease 1123 00:59:07,560 --> 00:59:12,200 Speaker 4: and pain by twenty fifty and support everybody to live 1124 00:59:12,280 --> 00:59:15,480 Speaker 4: in their best be recognized as that and contribute to 1125 00:59:15,520 --> 00:59:16,240 Speaker 4: the collective good. 1126 00:59:16,280 --> 00:59:17,800 Speaker 3: That's our vision and our mission. 1127 00:59:18,440 --> 00:59:21,840 Speaker 4: We've got training for health professionals in the most advanced 1128 00:59:21,880 --> 00:59:25,000 Speaker 4: precision health and medicine that's available, using the most advanced 1129 00:59:25,040 --> 00:59:29,439 Speaker 4: technologies in that space. This is obviously the more psychological 1130 00:59:29,480 --> 00:59:33,320 Speaker 4: conscious component of that for more psychologically driven individuals, but 1131 00:59:33,320 --> 00:59:36,240 Speaker 4: it all happens in the health professional space. We have 1132 00:59:36,560 --> 00:59:39,240 Speaker 4: corporate well being where we can talk about these principles 1133 00:59:39,240 --> 00:59:40,560 Speaker 4: and health and well being at work. 1134 00:59:41,320 --> 00:59:44,040 Speaker 3: We are obviously working with schools to support. 1135 00:59:43,720 --> 00:59:47,320 Speaker 4: Them with their learning, and we're doing a whole lot 1136 00:59:47,360 --> 00:59:50,560 Speaker 4: of research in this space of precision and personalized health 1137 00:59:50,560 --> 00:59:54,360 Speaker 4: as well. If you're interested in doing your own biological assessment, 1138 00:59:55,080 --> 00:59:58,920 Speaker 4: the app's called Shay and essentially the link is Shay 1139 00:59:59,160 --> 01:00:04,520 Speaker 4: dot group, sa A dot group, forward slash, dr doctor Dash, 1140 01:00:04,960 --> 01:00:08,040 Speaker 4: cam dash McDonald like the Hamburger mc d O n 1141 01:00:08,040 --> 01:00:10,320 Speaker 4: A l D, and you'll get all the links that 1142 01:00:10,360 --> 01:00:11,960 Speaker 4: you need on that website right there. 1143 01:00:12,760 --> 01:00:13,880 Speaker 1: Mate. You're so good at this. 1144 01:00:14,080 --> 01:00:16,960 Speaker 2: Genuinely, I really appreciate you. I don't know why it's 1145 01:00:16,960 --> 01:00:19,800 Speaker 2: been so long, but thanks for coming to play on 1146 01:00:19,840 --> 01:00:23,640 Speaker 2: the You project. Good luck with everything you're doing, and 1147 01:00:23,680 --> 01:00:25,760 Speaker 2: thanks for all the good stuff you put into the world. 1148 01:00:26,400 --> 01:00:28,080 Speaker 3: The nonor to be here harps, thanks for having me