Speaker 1: This is the Chrissy swanshow okay, and welcome to your Monday.
Speaker 2: He could.
Speaker 1: I feel really fresh.
Speaker 3: I had one of those weekends that was really productive
Speaker 3: with my hands.
Speaker 2: Did you end up doing the working beat we spoke about.
Speaker 3: I did, and it was really good because only my
Speaker 3: sister and her husband could give me any time.
Speaker 1: Actually they were the only people I asked.
Speaker 3: Okay, And we spent all afternoon and all evening just
Speaker 3: sort of laughing and ripping out weeds and cutting soil,
Speaker 3: and it was just brilliant.
Speaker 2: I loved it full Don Birck.
Speaker 1: Today is a very special day for people.
Speaker 3: And you may be even in the car on the
Speaker 3: way to collect your little darling from their first day
Speaker 3: of KINDI or prep or whatever you call it, wherever
Speaker 3: you are. And the reason I know that today is
Speaker 3: a big day because my kid's old now was my iPhone.
Speaker 3: You know how it puts together like a little movie
Speaker 3: of this day a few years ago.
Speaker 2: I love those memories.
Speaker 3: I love them too until I don't, and then I
Speaker 3: can't find I can't get to the thing today.
Speaker 1: Anyway, it showed.
Speaker 3: Me exactly where I was this day six years ago,
Speaker 3: twenty nineteen.
Speaker 1: Having an nty b I was weeping.
Speaker 3: I remember as if I had run over my own toe. Inconsolable.
Speaker 3: I've got the photos here. I took screenshots, but you
Speaker 3: think my phone will give them to me? No, I
Speaker 3: wanted to send them to you so you would laugh.
Speaker 4: Damn it.
Speaker 3: Thirteen twenty four to ten? Is it a big day
Speaker 3: for you? How are you going? Do you need a
Speaker 3: pep talk on the way to pick up? Are you okay?
Speaker 5: And for telling us, we'll give you a Baker's Delight
Speaker 5: voucher so you can go and get some afternoon snacks
Speaker 5: for the kids.
Speaker 1: Straight to the finger buns.
Speaker 3: So you know that's a cover of Susie Quatro and Smoky.
Speaker 3: That's someone impersonating their voices or.
Speaker 1: Is that the original track?
Speaker 2: Like?
Speaker 1: Is it a sample?
Speaker 2: I believe jump on the mic.
Speaker 5: I believe they re sung the vocal the original artist
Speaker 5: that but they resung it for Cyril.
Speaker 3: Susi Quatro and Smoky re sang it wrong. From the grave,
Speaker 3: I'd say, you're listening to the Christy.
Speaker 1: Swan show on over. Let's do this, Chrissy say.
Speaker 3: Before you call and say, hey, is it Quadra's not dead?
Speaker 3: I guess some Smoky we are asking you, is today
Speaker 3: a big day for you? Because my iPhone told me,
Speaker 3: reminded me that this day, six years ago, I was
Speaker 3: dropping my daughter to her first day of school and
Speaker 3: I was not.
Speaker 5: Okay, you weren't. And you found the photos in that
Speaker 5: awful new camera roll update.
Speaker 2: We all have to summer through.
Speaker 5: And you are properly breaking down in the car at
Speaker 5: school and at home.
Speaker 3: No, it's not at home. It's in the toilet stall.
Speaker 3: That's in the toilet stall.
Speaker 5: In the toilet stack in the car. Then this is
Speaker 5: at home. You even cried at home that's your kitchen.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, it is too. I was so upset, Vanessa.
Speaker 1: Were you? Was it a big day for you?
Speaker 4: Were you?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 2: Big day?
Speaker 6: But I'm absolutely fine. So four kids dropped off at
Speaker 6: school this morning after seven weeks at home?
Speaker 1: Why were the holidays so long? Vanessa?
Speaker 6: That's I have no idea. Looks they had at the
Speaker 6: time of their life, but I'd had enough buy like today,
Speaker 6: I was very happy.
Speaker 1: What did you do when you were free?
Speaker 6: I actually went to Doncaster and done a bit of shopping.
Speaker 3: Oh, you went to your little like a Westfield, a
Speaker 3: little sushi hand roll and I like it. I love
Speaker 3: a little sit down neck massage from one of those
Speaker 3: places to stop the main drag.
Speaker 1: Yeah, magic mess.
Speaker 5: You're right, those Swani a sushi roll. You can't go
Speaker 5: to a shopping center without having a sushi roll.
Speaker 1: You can't.
Speaker 3: Having said that, you can also have a rice paper
Speaker 3: roll that'll do it as well.
Speaker 7: More.
Speaker 5: If you've got a Baker's Delight, you can have a
Speaker 5: ham and cheese pizza or a Savory Bite.
Speaker 1: The hot Doggy Ones, the Savory Vanessa.
Speaker 5: A Baker's Delight voucher is on its way to you.
Speaker 5: Let's go to George Joel.
Speaker 2: Hi, guys, big day for you, George.
Speaker 7: Yes, the most of the amazing day ever.
Speaker 2: What happened, George?
Speaker 7: Just to see my boy's eyes slide up as their
Speaker 7: first day of school in their fresh new uniforms just
Speaker 7: made my day go so good.
Speaker 1: Did you have a little weep in the in the
Speaker 1: in the Ford forest on the way home?
Speaker 7: Yes, I did a little bit. I was happy they're
Speaker 7: gone by the same time my heart broke that they're gone.
Speaker 1: Do you have younger ones or older ones? Or is
Speaker 1: it is that it I've.
Speaker 7: Got young ones too? Twin boys?
Speaker 2: And what are their names George.
Speaker 7: George, Georgie and Jeffrey.
Speaker 1: Jeffrey. Hello, Jeffrey, No, no, I meant do you have
Speaker 1: any younger than that? Or this is it? This is
Speaker 1: the first day of prep, your last day of prep?
Speaker 1: All of it?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 7: Yeah, first, Yeah, that's it. That's it, that's all we got.
Speaker 5: Oh my god, George, Baker's Delight voucher on its way
Speaker 5: to you.
Speaker 2: George.
Speaker 3: I feel like Jeffrey would like a finger barn or
Speaker 3: a you know those little custardy scrolls.
Speaker 2: Now I want a finger bon.
Speaker 1: Jake, Jake, what sort of today is to just today?
Speaker 8: Today has been an absolute ship name? Oh hi mate,
Speaker 8: I've been up on this roof since seven in the morning.
Speaker 8: I've only changed two sheets. We're going to do about thirty.
Speaker 8: Have anyone to in about seven hours?
Speaker 1: Now?
Speaker 2: Been here?
Speaker 8: The boss is upset. Oh forgot on my lunch walks
Speaker 8: at home. Oh, I am going.
Speaker 1: I'm going to say to you what I say to
Speaker 1: my kids.
Speaker 3: Do I need to send an email or call someone
Speaker 3: to get you out of this rubbish?
Speaker 8: Any help? Any help? Please?
Speaker 3: Also, if you forgot your lunchbox, your Baker's Delight is open.
Speaker 3: Go there with this voucher at the end.
Speaker 2: It is on its way to you, Jake.
Speaker 5: And speaking of Baker's Delight, We've got a brand new
Speaker 5: competition coming up Chrissy and Jack's Lunch Order and there
Speaker 5: is one thousand dollars.
Speaker 2: Cash to be one.
Speaker 1: Chrissy Swan Show.
Speaker 3: I have uncovered an alarming trend, Jack, what is it?
Speaker 1: Well, it's not what you think.
Speaker 3: I'm about to say that men are flocking to female
Speaker 3: dominated yoga and pilates classes at me, that is not
Speaker 3: the trend that is alarming. The trend that is alarming
Speaker 3: is that they're not welcome. Ladies are complaining about men
Speaker 3: in there, you know, in through the nose, out through
Speaker 3: the mouth kind of classes, and that makes me sad.
Speaker 2: It feels harsh.
Speaker 1: It does feel harsh, you do PILARTI.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm the King of the Reformer or the king
Speaker 2: of the Reformer.
Speaker 1: And how many men are in your like what's the ratio? Meant?
Speaker 5: So like the other day there were three dudes including
Speaker 5: myself and then probably seven chicks, so I think there
Speaker 5: were ten of us.
Speaker 1: And are you made to feel welcome or just like nothing?
Speaker 1: Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 5: Like, well, I'm not Okay, Yeah, I've always felt welcome.
Speaker 5: I'm respectful, and I'm not annoyingly loud, and I don't grunt.
Speaker 5: And I'm also the teacher's pet. The bloody teacher froths me.
Speaker 2: So she just stands here and chats with me the
Speaker 2: whole time. So I think they'd be more annoyed than I.
Speaker 3: Are you getting any work done? Or are you just like,
Speaker 3: oh my god, have you seen the new trailer for
Speaker 3: the Cutter?
Speaker 2: I'm trying to but she does a lot of that chat.
Speaker 3: Well, not the case in America. I have listened to
Speaker 3: this little pieced camera.
Speaker 1: Is lady recorded.
Speaker 9: I'm going to say something about men and group fitness classes.
Speaker 9: It's going to pissed some people off.
Speaker 4: But I don't.
Speaker 9: Just took a hot yoga class and there are many
Speaker 9: guys in the class, particular man push ups before class started,
Speaker 9: heavy breathing, grunting, slurbing is water. It is a quiet,
Speaker 9: sand peaceful yoga class. It is seven in the morning.
Speaker 9: Why must you take up more space than you already
Speaker 9: naturally do? Why can you be seen and not her
Speaker 9: dem here?
Speaker 1: Cutesee?
Speaker 9: You know like you don't we get it. You're a
Speaker 9: man like you don't need to act like it's annoying.
Speaker 3: And she's a bit annoying. My secretly hate her. The
Speaker 3: problem I have with this is she said hot yoga.
Speaker 3: Oh it is peaceful and calm.
Speaker 1: It is not. You get in that room, you are
Speaker 1: fighting for your life.
Speaker 2: It is a straight up hell. That's how I imagine
Speaker 2: hell to be.
Speaker 3: I've done it once, shame, and I felt like my
Speaker 3: head was shrinking, like that scene out of Beetlejuice.
Speaker 2: You know, just all of a sudden. Did you have
Speaker 2: to walk out of the room or did you commit?
Speaker 1: When you say walk out? Does that? Does it count?
Speaker 1: If I crawled?
Speaker 3: I crawled on all fours through the through the door
Speaker 3: into the bathroom, pushed the bottom of the door to
Speaker 3: get into the bathroom, and just lay on the cold floor.
Speaker 2: How long into the class do you think that was?
Speaker 1: I did it. I did it for a while. I
Speaker 1: was quite you know, crave. Yeah, But just say, how
Speaker 1: long is a class ullive? Forty five minutes?
Speaker 3: I reckon I did thirty, but it was uncomfortable and
Speaker 3: I was like short of breath. I'm that guy like
Speaker 3: I would be guzzling my water and going ah ah.
Speaker 2: You feel like you're at death's door.
Speaker 5: I'm impressing recently, swany I did it last week with
Speaker 5: two of my mates and I made it to the
Speaker 5: twenty two minute mark.
Speaker 1: Oh my, that sounds familiar. I think I did the same.
Speaker 5: I looked at my cause I looked at my phone
Speaker 5: and I'm like, I I've got to step outside, and.
Speaker 2: The teacher saw and opened the door for me.
Speaker 5: The exercises themselves weren't what I was struggling with.
Speaker 2: It was the heat. My head was spinning.
Speaker 1: How hot is it?
Speaker 5: It's like it's like one hundred degrees now I feel
Speaker 5: like it's only like thirty eight degrees.
Speaker 3: I think we should talk more about hot yogat tomorrow
Speaker 3: and speak to people that don't want to die.
Speaker 1: At the twenty two minute mark, I know because it
Speaker 1: was the secret crep. Do you prep? Do you like
Speaker 1: super hydrate?
Speaker 5: I was sucking back on my frank Green the night
Speaker 5: before to ensure that I was hydrated. It didn't help,
Speaker 5: but okay, yeah, tomorrow we need tips because I'd like
Speaker 5: to be good at it.
Speaker 1: I would too because I love the heat.
Speaker 3: I'm fine in Far North Queensland and stuff, but put
Speaker 3: me in a biggram studio in Wherever and I'm Dead.
Speaker 5: Coming up next, we have a brand new game called
Speaker 5: Chrissy and Jack's Lunch Order thanks to our pals at
Speaker 5: Baker's Delight, and there is one thousand dollars cash to
Speaker 5: be one Swani.
Speaker 1: The Chrissy Swan Show, The Chrissy Swan Show.
Speaker 3: We spoke about this every day last week, and the
Speaker 3: moment has.
Speaker 2: A rise whether it's a school lunchbox or your workday lunch.
Speaker 7: The bagas Delight, high fiber lo Gi white Blood loads
Speaker 7: the tastey love with added benefits.
Speaker 1: Chrissy and Jack's Lunch Order.
Speaker 3: Can I tell you it was the joy of my
Speaker 3: life to just come back from shopping at Baker's Delight,
Speaker 3: where I just basically ordered one or two of every you.
Speaker 2: Quite literally went there just before the show and brought
Speaker 2: us lunch.
Speaker 3: And if you think that everything that I bought made
Speaker 3: it back to the studio, you'd be wrong, because there
Speaker 3: are a couple of little scrolls in that tumtime.
Speaker 6: Hello Hannah, Hello, how are you going?
Speaker 1: Hi good? Would you like to win a thousand dollars
Speaker 1: thanks to Baker's Delight?
Speaker 6: I would really love to win a thousand dollars.
Speaker 4: That would be amazing.
Speaker 1: What would you spend it on so much money?
Speaker 8: Well, I've just brought a renovation house and I'm sure
Speaker 8: it would go pretty quick.
Speaker 6: But I'd probably put it into my carpet in my nursery.
Speaker 1: Oh you're a sweetheart. All right, let's get cracking. I
Speaker 1: have got three items here from Baker's Delight. Now I
Speaker 1: am going to put them in order, ranking from high
Speaker 1: which is my favorite mm hmm, to lowest, which it
Speaker 1: sounds terrible to say that that is my least favorite
Speaker 1: because I literally love everything.
Speaker 4: On the menu.
Speaker 1: But you know, you got to put him in.
Speaker 2: Order for the purpose of the game. You can commit
Speaker 2: to one and you can make the tough decision.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 3: In front of me, Hannah, I have, in no particular order,
Speaker 3: cheese and tomato scroll, a finger bun, oh my god,
Speaker 3: and a savory bite and I believe that is barbecue
Speaker 3: flavor because of the brown sauce. Now I'm putting them
Speaker 3: in ranking in order one, two, three.
Speaker 5: Now, Hannah, if you get one correct, you get two
Speaker 5: hundred and fifty dollars cash. If you get the order
Speaker 5: of two of these products correct, you get five hundred
Speaker 5: dollars cash, or if you nail the lineup and you
Speaker 5: get all three correct, that is one thousand dollars cash.
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, finger craft, all right, put them in order.
Speaker 3: I'm trying to show a camera to prove it. All right, Okay, Jackie,
Speaker 3: you put yours in order.
Speaker 2: There.
Speaker 1: I've given you three two which today is my favorite?
Speaker 2: Alrighty, I'll do that now, all.
Speaker 3: Right, I'm going to cover them with a nova frisbee. Hannah,
Speaker 3: what is my favorite? The highest ranking out of savory bite?
Speaker 3: A finger bun and a cheese and tomato scroll?
Speaker 8: Okay, I'm going to put your favorite as so number
Speaker 8: one favorite savory bite with barbe kissaw.
Speaker 5: You are correct, two hundred and fifty dollars cash.
Speaker 2: What is next?
Speaker 1: How good are they? They're the ones with the little
Speaker 1: sausages in him?
Speaker 2: So good?
Speaker 7: Yeah, I am.
Speaker 6: I'm frankly as my favorite. So I'm hoping that it
Speaker 6: pays off. All right.
Speaker 4: I'm going to put number two as the finger bun.
Speaker 1: Hannah, Yes, you are correct, So number three?
Speaker 2: What is number three?
Speaker 4: Hannah?
Speaker 7: The cheese and tomatoes?
Speaker 5: Girl?
Speaker 2: You have got thousands cash?
Speaker 3: That is a thousand you hello, Wall to wall carpet in.
Speaker 1: Your nurse exciting.
Speaker 6: Thank you.
Speaker 5: You are so welcome, Hannah. And if you'd like to
Speaker 5: play Christy and Jackson lunch or.
Speaker 1: Jack did you get it?
Speaker 2: Tomorrow?
Speaker 1: I eat that Chrissy Swan show.
Speaker 3: Remember we had a bet about who was going to
Speaker 3: win the Best Pop Album, and.
Speaker 1: Now we know.
Speaker 2: Chrissy's clique.
Speaker 3: I said it was going to be Sabrina Carpenter and
Speaker 3: you said it was going to be Billie Eilid.
Speaker 1: Yes, who was it?
Speaker 2: Sabrina carp.
Speaker 1: I'm never right. Just let me enjoy it.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna let you gloat, have your moment.
Speaker 3: I tell you what we are going to do a
Speaker 3: little Grammys, you know, full rundown. But I've just noticed,
Speaker 3: out of the corner of my eye on the screen
Speaker 3: in this studio a little bit of married at first sight,
Speaker 3: and we need to discuss that.
Speaker 2: Yes, three, we will be deep you.
Speaker 3: Let's all right, Grammy's a time. Kanye West and his
Speaker 3: wife Bianca. I always want to call her Chen Sorry
Speaker 3: for some reason. No, no, no, it's like it's a real
Speaker 3: wanky Italian thing that I do.
Speaker 2: Like that.
Speaker 1: They were on the red carpet.
Speaker 3: She had no clothes on not a stitch and also
Speaker 3: not one hair.
Speaker 5: She would have happed on her head. I mean, I
Speaker 5: feel like she would have been lazy years ago. But wow,
Speaker 5: I mean, how.
Speaker 1: Do we why do we know that about her?
Speaker 2: The risk she took.
Speaker 3: Like if you're listening to us going, oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: they've pulled another stunt. No, this woman was naked apart from.
Speaker 1: She's done a sort of body stocking before.
Speaker 3: It wasn't that she's wearing something, but it's utterly see through.
Speaker 2: It is not covering anything.
Speaker 1: I can see her busies everything.
Speaker 5: Do you think she would have she was comfortable in this?
Speaker 5: She look Do you think she liked it?
Speaker 1: She looks very comfortable.
Speaker 2: Is it weird that I think she looks like it
Speaker 2: suits her. I know that's a bizarre thing to say,
Speaker 2: but I'm like far out. If anyone can kind of
Speaker 2: rock it, it's earth.
Speaker 1: I agree. She's got a magnificent set of busy, doesn't she?
Speaker 1: What just like pendulous? You know?
Speaker 5: It was reported that they were kicked out because after
Speaker 5: the red carpet they didn't go into the ceremony.
Speaker 3: He saw them in the ceremony, but they didn't. They
Speaker 3: just went home, got a couple of dimmies.
Speaker 1: And sat on the catch pretty much. What I do
Speaker 1: with the logis do the red carpet and then Taylor.
Speaker 3: Taylor is in a little saucy red outfit, feeling sexy,
Speaker 3: very short, a little too short. I think what you
Speaker 3: were very complimentary of Taylor Swift's outfit until.
Speaker 5: I really loved this red Vivin West With dress. But
Speaker 5: then Swanny I saw there was a tea hanging from
Speaker 5: her thigh. We don't need Travis's name or initial on
Speaker 5: your leg.
Speaker 2: We get it you're dating him.
Speaker 1: It's weird. She does love that sort of stuff.
Speaker 3: I'm trying to think of the song where she goes,
Speaker 3: I wonder wear it like a chain with his initial
Speaker 3: around my neck.
Speaker 1: Not because he he really knows kena screaming us.
Speaker 4: I want to Slana Jean Jean, not.
Speaker 1: Because it owns me. It's a great song.
Speaker 2: Actually, it's probably my second favorite reputation.
Speaker 1: So she's got a letter around her thigh.
Speaker 5: Yes, I think the best dress goes to Billie Eilish
Speaker 5: and Prata a black suit.
Speaker 1: I think the best dress goes to Charlie xc X
Speaker 1: and Jean Paul.
Speaker 3: She did look amazing, incredible and Chapel ran unbelievable performance
Speaker 3: of this track.
Speaker 2: Oh we Love Pink Pony Club.
Speaker 4: You're a pink Pony girl.
Speaker 1: Mama, Tom's screwing his face up at me.
Speaker 3: And yet every time I hear that song sung by
Speaker 3: that woman, I imagine it's Tom singing it.
Speaker 2: That is very Tom. Gasamando coda you boring, No.
Speaker 1: Just mouth the words and her voice suits you. Her
Speaker 1: voice suits you a lot.
Speaker 5: Chapel also did win Best New Artist Swanye that exciting
Speaker 5: Grammys for her.
Speaker 1: Yes, she's got nothing to Chapel moan about there.
Speaker 2: And also we got to talk about this gals.
Speaker 3: She was absolutely speechless when she won Country Music Artist
Speaker 3: of the Year.
Speaker 5: How do you think Casey Musgraves and Chris Stapleton feel
Speaker 5: about that?
Speaker 3: I mean, not great. I feel like Chris Stapleton's won before.
Speaker 3: He's an old man. I'm sure he's won it. But
Speaker 3: Casey Musgraves album Deeper Well is glorious.
Speaker 5: And you did notice when she was applauding Beyonce she
Speaker 5: had a little bit of a stink case because.
Speaker 3: You because there's this girl who looks like she's got
Speaker 3: a face like a slap bomb, and she go absolute
Speaker 3: dead pan and you wouldn't have even recognized who she was.
Speaker 3: I'm like, that's Casey Musgraves.
Speaker 1: Shit. Every time I hear you Hi cracking up in
Speaker 1: it sets me up. Hello, how are you are you doing? Okay?
Speaker 3: Just after three o'clock you're either waiting in the car
Speaker 3: park picking someone up or going get depending on how
Speaker 3: many times you've had to drop them to school and
Speaker 3: pick them up afterwards. Now, Jack, yes, you know I
Speaker 3: know about you know I'm cooking all the time.
Speaker 1: But I know that you have a favorite. I know
Speaker 1: everyone's favorite thing that.
Speaker 3: I make, and I know that yours is a pulled pork,
Speaker 3: and I made one, and I put aside.
Speaker 1: A pulled pork for you the best.
Speaker 2: This is the best thing to happen to me this week.
Speaker 1: To tell you just this is what a good bitch
Speaker 1: I am. As you say, what a good besh?
Speaker 2: What good's a good bishus? A good run me on
Speaker 2: the double?
Speaker 3: Anyway, just before the show, I ducked down to Baker's delight.
Speaker 3: This is going to sound like I'm making it up,
Speaker 3: but I'm not.
Speaker 1: And I got you. I got you some baps. That's
Speaker 1: my role of preference. Same for a pulled pork because
Speaker 1: they're soft and flowery.
Speaker 2: Or even I just love a bat with like ham
Speaker 2: and let us on the boat over summer.
Speaker 3: Did you did you know that bap is a nickname
Speaker 3: for bosoms?
Speaker 2: No? I didn't.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah bat? Did you know that?
Speaker 2: Top?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 3: So every time someone, every time I order a bap,
Speaker 3: like just then when I was in front of that
Speaker 3: lovely lady it because and I said, could I have
Speaker 3: six baps?
Speaker 2: You think of your busies?
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think, wow, six is a lot to handle. Ah. Okay,
Speaker 1: So here is the there's the pork in this one.
Speaker 5: Okay, thank you, And there is the You've even done
Speaker 5: the salad for me and everything.
Speaker 3: And I kept the dressing for the coals separate because
Speaker 3: otherwise it would have.
Speaker 2: Just been soggy city yucky.
Speaker 3: So and then last night when I was making it
Speaker 3: for the kids and me, I videoed me reheating it.
Speaker 2: Okay, great, so I can watch it titorial.
Speaker 3: There is a method to it to get it. Just
Speaker 3: there's your dinner for your beautiful housemate, Chris.
Speaker 2: And you you are the best swany.
Speaker 1: Thank you, my love.
Speaker 5: Hey, it's been a big day over in La. The
Speaker 5: Grammys are on we're going to talk about it again
Speaker 5: a little bit later. You and I need to fight
Speaker 5: about Lolla Young's song Messy Swany.
Speaker 1: Yes, because we really put a cat among these pigeons.
Speaker 3: I was sure was about an ex boyfriend and you said, no,
Speaker 3: it's her parents.
Speaker 1: And I got a lot of DM supporting you and sure.
Speaker 2: It's about her family. We'll deep dive on that.
Speaker 5: But breaking new Swaney, Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars just
Speaker 5: won Best Pop Duo Group Performance for Die with a Smile.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 5: And in even bigger news, Lady Gaga has just dropped
Speaker 5: a brand new single.
Speaker 1: I'm excited. This is the second one off that new album.
Speaker 5: Mayhem that's coming in March. This is called Abracadabra.
Speaker 1: We saw that on the track listing. Do you remember
Speaker 1: not with this magic themed music that's been going on
Speaker 1: over the last twelve months to the Chrissy Swan Show,
Speaker 1: The Chrissy Swan Show. So excited about these new bum bags,
Speaker 1: Chrissies Quizzy, Hello, Jessica, Hello, do you have a good weekend?
Speaker 1: It was right, Actually it was the best thing that happened.
Speaker 6: Ah kids birthday party.
Speaker 7: We went to a water park.
Speaker 5: How fun like that's one theme park.
Speaker 2: I can get around the water ones.
Speaker 1: I don't know, Jess.
Speaker 3: I've just got like PTSD from being a parent of
Speaker 3: young children, like the whole idea of a children's party. Now,
Speaker 3: I've done so many. How many kids have you got
Speaker 3: and how old are they?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 1: How many times have you hosted a party?
Speaker 6: I have two kids from just ten six the other.
Speaker 1: I love birthday parties.
Speaker 6: Unpopular opinion?
Speaker 3: Right, well, no, I did too, and I would go
Speaker 3: all out and then something happens when they get older.
Speaker 1: And I've got an extra one. I reckon, I've done
Speaker 1: like so good. Next I've got an extra one locked
Speaker 1: under the stairs. We just feed him Cheetos.
Speaker 3: No, because I've got three, And I reckon, I've done
Speaker 3: thirty parties and I am done.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's hot, man, and Jess, like, it's forty degrees
Speaker 5: you're in Adelaide. It's forty degrees in Adelaide today. It
Speaker 5: was hot over the weekend too, it is, but.
Speaker 6: It feels like seventy eight today.
Speaker 1: Can I ask you a very stupid question.
Speaker 3: Do the silver balls in roundel Mall get hot in
Speaker 3: the heat or are they made of a material that
Speaker 3: is heat resistant?
Speaker 6: I haven't touched the balls recently or seen them.
Speaker 1: That's what your husband said. If they feel like they're
Speaker 1: going to get very hot, we'll find out.
Speaker 5: Let's say hello to Leanne, who celebrated a birthday over
Speaker 5: the weekend.
Speaker 2: She's in Perth. Happy birthday, Leanne.
Speaker 6: Oh, thank you.
Speaker 1: What did you do for your birthday? Anything fun?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 6: We're into the fringe festival in Perth. That's not at
Speaker 6: the moment.
Speaker 1: What's going on in the fringe festival in Perth.
Speaker 8: Ah, So there's a.
Speaker 6: Kathin Kim drag show which is really.
Speaker 2: Good, amazing, Leanne.
Speaker 3: Can I tell you that Kath and Kim, it just
Speaker 3: transcends generations and sexuality. My daughter was falling asleep last
Speaker 3: night and I go in and check on them because
Speaker 3: I'm a sucker and I like to watch some sleep.
Speaker 1: They're so peaceful. Anyway, Look, I went in and I thought,
Speaker 1: what does that sound?
Speaker 3: She had her phone propped up and Kath and Kim
Speaker 3: on YouTube to as her lullabye iconic.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 6: I actually took my third and you'd sun to see it.
Speaker 6: And he got up on stage and everything. So it
Speaker 6: was really good.
Speaker 1: Oh good on him. I love a bit of confidence.
Speaker 1: All right, girls, that's what you're gonna need.
Speaker 3: Confidence, because only one of you can take home this bumbag.
Speaker 3: Your name's your buzzes. It's the best of five, meaning
Speaker 3: the first person to get three ounces quick. When's the
Speaker 3: game gets to the bum bag? Question number one, what
Speaker 3: do bees.
Speaker 1: Collect to make honey? Yes, and.
Speaker 2: Jess Colin.
Speaker 1: I thought it was polland too, but it says Nick
Speaker 1: to here. Tom, Well, he's just given the thumbs up.
Speaker 1: You can easily change his mind.
Speaker 2: You've got it on.
Speaker 3: Sale of the Century. Tony Barba would call Fran. Glen
Speaker 3: Rooge would call Fran. Question number two, what is the
Speaker 3: name of the toy cowboy in the movie Toy Story?
Speaker 1: Leanne? Yes, yes, yep, two.
Speaker 2: Points to Jess. Question number three is for the win Jess.
Speaker 3: Who took home the Granny for her album Short and
Speaker 3: Sweet in Today's Ceremony?
Speaker 1: Yes, Leanne Sabrina Carpentie.
Speaker 2: Yes, she's on the scoreboard. One point to Leanne. Question
Speaker 2: number four, what.
Speaker 1: Gas do humans exhale?
Speaker 6: Yes?
Speaker 1: Yes, Jess for the wind.
Speaker 6: Carmon Diacbot correct, BB.
Speaker 3: You have got yourself a bum bag and it's one
Speaker 3: of the new ones. It's actually a design that you'll like,
Speaker 3: not one that you have to hide.
Speaker 6: I have covered these for so long. I've wanted one,
Speaker 6: and oh my, I'm so excited.
Speaker 1: Oh Jesse, you was so cute. We put something in it.
Speaker 2: For jess a Baker's Delight voucher for you, jes Bang.
Speaker 7: Oh my god, thank you.
Speaker 2: You are so happy. Welcome. Have a great Monday evening, Ladies.
Speaker 1: The Christy Swan Show. Let's talk messy because you told
Speaker 1: me a job. Oh, I love it so much.
Speaker 5: And at this time last week, our first show back
Speaker 5: of the year, we said that this was the official
Speaker 5: song of summer.
Speaker 1: I think it absolutely is. I said that at home
Speaker 1: and my son rolled his eyes on me.
Speaker 2: No, kid's wrong.
Speaker 1: I said, what are you talking about. Don't you like
Speaker 1: that song? And he goes, not really. I said, you're
Speaker 1: only saying that because I like it. Go to your room.
Speaker 2: Correct.
Speaker 1: I didn't say that last bit.
Speaker 2: That's just me showing to get out, get out of
Speaker 2: the house. I just don't see that gutter over there.
Speaker 2: You can sleep there tonight, champion.
Speaker 1: Nothing.
Speaker 2: You know who your mother is.
Speaker 1: I'm glad you're enjoying the house.
Speaker 4: I thought.
Speaker 3: I didn't say any of that. Yes, I did anyway, messy,
Speaker 3: we love it. We don't care if a thirteen year
Speaker 3: old throw shaded us.
Speaker 1: No, And I the minute I heard it and saw her.
Speaker 3: I knew that the lyrics were about The entire song
Speaker 3: was about the disapproval of a romantic partner of a boyfriend.
Speaker 2: You're on, No, I'm not.
Speaker 1: It's just so clear to me.
Speaker 3: And then you said it was about parents, and then
Speaker 3: everybody on my DMS agreed with you when they're idiots.
Speaker 5: Tell me why you think it's about a boyfriend. It's
Speaker 5: so clear to me that it's about her parents, and
Speaker 5: I can actually you do your argument first, you go firstteen.
Speaker 1: Twenty four ten.
Speaker 3: By the way, if you're anything like us and you did,
Speaker 3: you google the lyrics before today.
Speaker 2: I've been singing it and listening to it.
Speaker 1: It's so I'm a lyric googler, as you know.
Speaker 3: If you think it's very clear about a boyfriend, please
Speaker 3: let us know.
Speaker 1: So here's the thing.
Speaker 3: The starters, because I'm too messy, and then I'm too
Speaker 3: effing clean. Since when as a parent ever gonna say
Speaker 3: you're too clean? No, that's the sort of shade of
Speaker 3: shit bloke throws at you.
Speaker 2: No, if you've got like a parent because.
Speaker 1: You can't be good enough for some people.
Speaker 2: I feel like people feel like that about their parents.
Speaker 1: No, yes, what is a parent wrong? What sort of
Speaker 1: parent would ever say.
Speaker 3: You're around the house all the time, Go and get
Speaker 3: a job, and then when you do get a job,
Speaker 3: they say, where have you been?
Speaker 1: That is a boyfriend.
Speaker 5: No, that's a parent with a dropkick kid who hasn't managed,
Speaker 5: who hasn't taken the time to write a resume and
Speaker 5: go and start earning a dollar.
Speaker 1: Well, no, she's got a job. She doesn't then need
Speaker 1: to be asked where she's been.
Speaker 3: That's annoying? And what about this I'm too perfect to
Speaker 3: open my big mouth. No, that is a boyfriend controlling her.
Speaker 5: No, that's a parent like Dassy and their kid up
Speaker 5: being like you're the best, ever, you're the best. And
Speaker 5: then they're at home on a Saturday night and Laura's
Speaker 5: trying to chat and then the parents like, shut up, Lala.
Speaker 3: A thousand people, I could be shut up, Lalla, a
Speaker 3: thousand people. I could be for you, and you hate
Speaker 3: the effing lot.
Speaker 1: That is a boy friend, an idiot, bad, stinky poo
Speaker 1: pooh boy friend.
Speaker 2: Stinky poopoop it is? Well it is?
Speaker 1: And what about this? Since when would a mother or
Speaker 1: a father know what time of the month it is
Speaker 1: for their child.
Speaker 5: Because she's probably because she doesn't have a job and
Speaker 5: she's lazy. She has to go to her mum to
Speaker 5: ask her to buy the sanitary goods for her.
Speaker 3: No, only boys know because it means they can't do
Speaker 3: the business.
Speaker 5: Well swannye Lola appeared on Jimmy Fallon last week and
Speaker 5: said this about the song.
Speaker 10: So it's been speculated that it's a art low my parents,
Speaker 10: and it's must be about some some close family. But
Speaker 10: our culmination is I feel about myself like I am
Speaker 10: too messy. You know, I've never held held a boom
Speaker 10: in my life. Everything in my life is a mass,
Speaker 10: so it's a very fitting tart.
Speaker 3: Okay, no, no, no, no, listen, Please don't pull those
Speaker 3: faces when I've been out working my ass off all day.
Speaker 3: It's just one bottle of wine or two. You smoke
Speaker 3: weed just to help you sleep? What mother is smoking
Speaker 3: weed to help her sleep?
Speaker 2: Old pothead Patricia, No, it's a boyfriend, listen, she says,
Speaker 2: close family.
Speaker 10: So it's been speculated that it's about low my parents,
Speaker 10: and it's mustively about some some close family.
Speaker 1: No, but she's saying that they've got shit boyfriend.
Speaker 5: She didn't confirm or than I because I think what
Speaker 5: since the song's become such a hit, her parents are
Speaker 5: like this, and Lola, stop telling everyone that it's about us.
Speaker 2: That's not fair. We raised you. No, don't get a pothead.
Speaker 3: No, and no child thinks their parents hates them. No,
Speaker 3: they don't, they do, they do not.
Speaker 1: I excuse me.
Speaker 3: This time last night I was rubbing magnesium onto the
Speaker 3: souls of the feet of my teenager.
Speaker 2: Yeah that's you, though, Swanny. We're talking about Lola's parents.
Speaker 1: Who could hate that magical unicorn lady.
Speaker 5: I don't know when she produces such an incredible song
Speaker 5: like this, turn it up for your Monday afternoon.
Speaker 1: On christ Definitely a relationship. Definitely parents the Christy Swan Show.
Speaker 3: I've got to check in on how I'm going with
Speaker 3: the intentions and the ins and outs that you've set
Speaker 3: for me on Friday. Yes, a big list of global
Speaker 3: ins and outs. They're boring emojis and you know what
Speaker 3: Irl experiences jam and I.
Speaker 5: Said that I think an out should be ins and outs,
Speaker 5: Like I hate seeing them, they annoying me.
Speaker 1: I agree, So instead I thought, you know, we all
Speaker 1: sort of.
Speaker 3: Around this time of the year, we try and set
Speaker 3: goals for the year, and I often just do very
Speaker 3: simple ones like no rushing. I've rolled that over a
Speaker 3: whole lot, and I've failed every day of my life
Speaker 3: about it. And I thought, I'm doing this wrong. I
Speaker 3: can't achieve anything I want to achieve. I'm gonna hand
Speaker 3: it over to Jack.
Speaker 1: What would you intend for me?
Speaker 3: What would you what can you see from your perspective
Speaker 3: from the outside in which I think is genius if
Speaker 3: I don't say myself. And you gave me three tips.
Speaker 3: You said, Swanny, you've got to eat out. You've written
Speaker 3: once a week. You've crossed that out because you're a
Speaker 3: realistic eat out fortnightly.
Speaker 5: And you ask me if that can be so well,
Speaker 5: and I said, sometimes it can, but also sometimes I'd
Speaker 5: like you to do it with friends or me, so
Speaker 5: you can sort of get a circuit breaker from eating
Speaker 5: at the compound.
Speaker 1: I agree, and I'm really going to try that.
Speaker 3: The second one was post on Instagram at least three
Speaker 3: times a week. I've posted on the weekend I'm doing well,
Speaker 3: and that.
Speaker 5: Can also include a work post like if we do
Speaker 5: something funny, I do a work post, and too personal posts.
Speaker 1: And my magic I've kicked that, yes, and this one.
Speaker 1: It's the hardest.
Speaker 3: Civil This is because you know I'm a s lovely woman. Yes,
Speaker 3: serve a look once a week, yep, And that means
Speaker 3: what do you see that as?
Speaker 1: Meaning?
Speaker 5: For me, it means no athletesure where or active were
Speaker 5: I don't want to see a howker, I don't want
Speaker 5: to see leggings, and I don't want to see like
Speaker 5: a tight compression yes, jim top.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So to me it means dress for your destination. My
Speaker 3: destination is work, Yes, don't dress as if work is
Speaker 3: on the way to somewhere else.
Speaker 2: Correct greater.
Speaker 1: Now that's how I see it. Good and that's worked
Speaker 1: for me.
Speaker 3: This is the second look that I have served since
Speaker 3: we've been back.
Speaker 1: We've only been back a week. Not even I would.
Speaker 2: Argue you served more than one look last week. But okay, can.
Speaker 3: I bank them up later on? No, No, it's still
Speaker 3: got to be one a week, one a week. Can
Speaker 3: I tell you so?
Speaker 1: Today I'm wearing it's all new.
Speaker 2: By the way, it's very chic.
Speaker 1: It's an Elk shirt. Yes that I had to cut
Speaker 1: the tag off brand new.
Speaker 2: It's fantastic.
Speaker 4: I love it.
Speaker 2: Black button on it, I.
Speaker 1: Love it too.
Speaker 3: It's a longer sleeve so it hides my flubbita arms.
Speaker 3: And then I've got sentences unusual to say, the Gucci
Speaker 3: belt that Melbe from the Spice Girls gave.
Speaker 2: Me, which we love and we're here for Thank you, mel.
Speaker 1: I've got my magical Henny pants that looks like they
Speaker 1: were tailored for them.
Speaker 5: They literally look like they were made for you. Shout
Speaker 5: out to our pal Nadia Bartel.
Speaker 3: I've got my favorite style of Frankie four shoes. I've
Speaker 3: got these in five different styles, and I tried on
Speaker 3: three wow with this outfit and went with the black plaid.
Speaker 2: Well, you've nailed that because it matches your belt and
Speaker 2: your shirt.
Speaker 1: And I matched my jewelry to the belt and my earrings.
Speaker 3: I really did a lot of efforts. So I chose
Speaker 3: that outfit and I hung it up on my wardrobe.
Speaker 3: Then I looked at my hair and there was some
Speaker 3: gray coming through, and I thought, absolutely not, so I
Speaker 3: had to dye my hair at home. I did it
Speaker 3: at home, yes, and then in the gardening working bee,
Speaker 3: I cracked two nails and I thought.
Speaker 2: No, you know, I'm a nails guy.
Speaker 1: Thought I can't see Jack with these. So I had
Speaker 1: to find an appointment on a Sunday, Wow Sunday at
Speaker 1: four point thirty to fix them. The pressure has nearly
Speaker 1: killed you.
Speaker 2: Well.
Speaker 5: I did receive a text message from you quite late
Speaker 5: last night. It was at eight thirty pm, and you
Speaker 5: said I cannot believe the pressure of serving a look.
Speaker 5: And I replied to you and said I can assist
Speaker 5: if needed. You've got this shop, your wardrobe, etc.
Speaker 1: Normally I just go to my active wear draw. That's it.
Speaker 1: I've got one draw, It's all in there. I pull
Speaker 1: it out and put it on. Can I tell you
Speaker 1: I'm enjoying this?
Speaker 2: See it's fun.
Speaker 3: I'm enjoying it. I feel like a different person. And
Speaker 3: every time I walk through the doors at work, people go,
Speaker 3: do you look good today?
Speaker 1: I got I must have looked like absolute crap.
Speaker 2: Maybe she hasn't lost the will to wive.
Speaker 1: The Chrissy Swan show. Let's do this.
Speaker 11: Chrissy has Cliffaite, then Yo Blay has cash prizes just
Speaker 11: Yo play.
Speaker 2: But you're a chance to win promo wins Much five
Speaker 2: Seas and season Fly to Win dot Com to.
Speaker 1: Chrissy's click bait, Yeah you and I.
Speaker 3: As soon as the gnoms were announced for the Grammys,
Speaker 3: we picked our favorites. Mine was Espressover by Sabrina Carpenter.
Speaker 3: I saidn't that can't be beaten?
Speaker 2: No, because that kind of was the record of last year.
Speaker 1: Absolutely.
Speaker 5: I wanted Billie Eilish Birds of a Feather to win, though,
Speaker 5: because I'm a billy stand and I love that woman.
Speaker 3: And the category Record of the Year is sort of like,
Speaker 3: you know, best Picture of the Oscars. It always comes
Speaker 3: last in the ceremony. It's the big one, like.
Speaker 2: The Gold Logie.
Speaker 3: It's just been announced that it is neither Birds of
Speaker 3: a Feather by Billie Eilish or Espresso by Sabrina Carpenter.
Speaker 3: It is not Like Us by Kendrick Lamar, the only.
Speaker 1: One that again it's pai a ready.
Speaker 5: Song, no doubt us, also beating Good Luck Babe by
Speaker 5: Chapel Roan and Fortnite by Your Queen Taite.
Speaker 3: And Texas Hold Them by Beyond Save, which caused its
Speaker 3: own sensation.
Speaker 1: Very surprised. I think it's a conspiracy and it's all
Speaker 1: because you know, the Record of the Year artist has
Speaker 1: got a win. If he's going to be the halftime
Speaker 1: entertainment of the super Bowl, it wouldn't be a good look.
Speaker 2: If he wasn't but a super Bowl pr I've.
Speaker 1: Got another theory coming at her about married at first Sight.
Speaker 3: Juggernaut continues. More people every year watch it. I am
Speaker 3: not watching it, and I'm here to tell you don't
Speaker 3: need to. You can just hook into the news websites
Speaker 3: and play along with the romance.
Speaker 1: And intrigue in the storyline. Last night we met Ryan
Speaker 1: and Jackie O. Ryan is a self confessed warrior, whatever
Speaker 1: that means.
Speaker 4: In terms of my identity as a warrior. Instinctively, I'm
Speaker 4: very protective.
Speaker 11: It's more I'm more concerned about the whole how it's
Speaker 11: going to present for her and.
Speaker 3: If you're wondering what he's talking about. He dropped her
Speaker 3: when I first heard about this, because, as I said,
Speaker 3: I'm not watching it.
Speaker 1: Get all my information the secondhand the way I like it.
Speaker 3: Ah, he dropped her, didn't dump her from the relationship.
Speaker 3: They were dancing and he dipped her and went too
Speaker 3: far and she hit the floor properly.
Speaker 2: Pumped.
Speaker 4: You're going to have to catch me though, bang.
Speaker 2: Solid thud right there.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, she really hit it like a sack
Speaker 3: of potatoes. He was apparently, you know, he looked as
Speaker 3: if he was very upset by it, and then.
Speaker 1: He tried to be chivalrous or did he have.
Speaker 11: A listen discussion with production preserving that dignity because that
Speaker 11: was not right. That was a miscalculation. And I don't
Speaker 11: feel that she needs to be ridiculed like that.
Speaker 4: It's more about her than anything. Jackie's perfectly fine. I'm
Speaker 4: not thinking myself. I'm thinking of hurt. Everyone was horrified.
Speaker 11: I don't want those reactions to be a subject of
Speaker 11: national ridicule.
Speaker 4: People will laugh and what alot with a bestick hand
Speaker 4: put even keep her up? Blaha blah. All I can
Speaker 4: do is a question about not make it to national broadcast.
Speaker 1: He showed his petticoat there.
Speaker 2: Why what's your theory?
Speaker 1: Nothing to do with Jackie.
Speaker 2: It's about him, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1: Because he's a warrior and who's a strong room.
Speaker 2: He's a gym broke.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and he panicked.
Speaker 2: He was like, oh my god, how embarrassing.
Speaker 1: Someone might say those things about me. I might be ridiculed.
Speaker 3: He said a couple of things in there that had
Speaker 3: nothing to do with Jackie had to do with him.
Speaker 3: So what he's done is he's twisted it and gone, oh,
Speaker 3: I don't want Jackie.
Speaker 1: To be ridiculed. I don't want that woman to be upset.
Speaker 1: It's not about that.
Speaker 3: It's about he should have been strong enough in his
Speaker 3: mind physically to keep this woman up right, and it's
Speaker 3: all about him. And also, there is no way if
Speaker 3: a woman hits the deck a dad for being dipped,
Speaker 3: that's going to make the TV show come on.
Speaker 2: That's all production one.
Speaker 5: And also good job to mass this year for breaking
Speaker 5: the fourth wall and showing us these conversations.
Speaker 2: It makes it far juicy.
Speaker 1: And also it.
Speaker 3: Minimizes the crying foul of the edit at the end
Speaker 3: of the show, which I think is a good self protective.
Speaker 3: There's no doubt in my mind that sometimes there is
Speaker 3: a bad edit, but sometimes there's not.
Speaker 5: Regularly, Tim and Joel are up next. They'll be delivering
Speaker 5: more Grammy goss and news. I'm sure have a beautiful evening. Swanni,
Speaker 5: thank you for.
Speaker 3: Making Yes, I'm in bed early tonight because I'm filling
Speaker 3: in again on fits in whipp with Kate Richie tomorrow morning.
Speaker 1: If you're in Sydney, have.
Speaker 2: A listen, have a great show.
Speaker 1: The Chrissy Swan Show is a Nova podcast.
Speaker 3: For more great comedy shows like this, head to novapodcast
Speaker 3: dot com.
Speaker 5: Do you