1 00:00:01,960 --> 00:00:04,960 Speaker 1: The public has had a long held fascination with detectives. 2 00:00:05,440 --> 00:00:07,840 Speaker 1: Detective see a side of life the average person is 3 00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:11,160 Speaker 1: never exposed to. I spent thirty four years as a cop. 4 00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:14,080 Speaker 1: For twenty five of those years, I was catching killers. 5 00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:16,280 Speaker 1: That's what I did for a living. I was a 6 00:00:16,280 --> 00:00:20,600 Speaker 1: homicide detective. I'm no longer just interviewing bad guys. Instead, 7 00:00:20,640 --> 00:00:23,200 Speaker 1: I'm taking the public into the world in which I operated. 8 00:00:23,880 --> 00:00:26,480 Speaker 1: The guests I talk to each week have amazing stories 9 00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:28,840 Speaker 1: from all sides of the law. The interviews are raw 10 00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:31,520 Speaker 1: and honest, just like the people I talk to. Some 11 00:00:31,640 --> 00:00:34,680 Speaker 1: of the content and language might be confronting. That's because 12 00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:37,720 Speaker 1: no one who comes into contact with crime is left unchanged. 13 00:00:38,200 --> 00:00:40,440 Speaker 1: Join me now as I take you into this world. 14 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:49,080 Speaker 1: Welcome to another episode of I Catch Killers. Today there's 15 00:00:49,080 --> 00:00:51,440 Speaker 1: a listener warning out. The subject matter is going to 16 00:00:51,440 --> 00:00:54,320 Speaker 1: be fairly distressing. We're going to be talking about domestic 17 00:00:54,360 --> 00:00:57,040 Speaker 1: and family violence, which has been very prominent in the 18 00:00:57,080 --> 00:01:00,000 Speaker 1: media of recent times. There's hardly a week that goes 19 00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:03,560 Speaker 1: by when someone hasn't been killed as a result of 20 00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:07,400 Speaker 1: domestic and family violence. As time things are stopped. Today, 21 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:10,759 Speaker 1: we're speaking to Lloyd and Sue Clark. They're the parents 22 00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:13,240 Speaker 1: of Hannah Clarke, who was murdered along with her three 23 00:01:13,319 --> 00:01:16,880 Speaker 1: children are Leah who is six years old, Leana four 24 00:01:16,959 --> 00:01:19,480 Speaker 1: years old, and Tray three years old when they were 25 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:22,000 Speaker 1: dousing petrol and set alight on the nine eighth of 26 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:26,760 Speaker 1: February twenty twenty. The perpetrator of this horrendous crime was 27 00:01:26,840 --> 00:01:30,680 Speaker 1: Raum Baxter, Hannah's husband and the father of the three children. 28 00:01:31,319 --> 00:01:33,560 Speaker 1: It was a crime that shook the nation and sparked 29 00:01:33,560 --> 00:01:37,880 Speaker 1: a national debate about domestic violence. Well, today we've got 30 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:40,640 Speaker 1: Lloyd and Sue Clark in the studio with us, and 31 00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:42,440 Speaker 1: we're going to sit down and talk about the lead 32 00:01:42,520 --> 00:01:45,520 Speaker 1: up to what occurred to their family and how they're 33 00:01:45,560 --> 00:01:49,520 Speaker 1: trying to make things different, bringing in new legislation, changing 34 00:01:49,600 --> 00:01:51,920 Speaker 1: things so this type of thing doesn't happen. We need 35 00:01:51,960 --> 00:01:55,040 Speaker 1: to talk about domestic and family violence, and Lloyd and 36 00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:57,960 Speaker 1: Sue Clark are people that have been touched on it 37 00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:01,880 Speaker 1: in the most awful of ways. Sue and Lloyd Clark, 38 00:02:02,480 --> 00:02:03,600 Speaker 1: welcome to the podcast. 39 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:05,000 Speaker 2: Thank you for having us. 40 00:02:05,880 --> 00:02:08,720 Speaker 1: Yeah, no, it's a pleasure, guys. And I think the 41 00:02:08,720 --> 00:02:11,640 Speaker 1: first time we met was at that charity function Small 42 00:02:11,680 --> 00:02:14,760 Speaker 1: Steps for Hannah. I've got to say it was an 43 00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:17,320 Speaker 1: impressive turnout, a lot of people there supporting what you 44 00:02:17,360 --> 00:02:20,720 Speaker 1: were doing for the small steps for Hannah. I sat 45 00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:25,280 Speaker 1: beside you guys during the event at the table, and 46 00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:28,840 Speaker 1: I got to say when I came away from that event, 47 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:32,000 Speaker 1: I was full of mixed emotions. I just had a 48 00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:36,000 Speaker 1: overwhelming sense of sadness of what you guys had gone through, 49 00:02:36,639 --> 00:02:39,799 Speaker 1: talking to you and just understanding the impact that's had 50 00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:42,919 Speaker 1: on you. But I was also inspired. I was inspired 51 00:02:42,960 --> 00:02:46,919 Speaker 1: by the courageous way that you guys have moved forward 52 00:02:47,080 --> 00:02:49,960 Speaker 1: from what happened, never forgetting, but moving forward and trying 53 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:55,080 Speaker 1: to make a difference. Where do you get the strength 54 00:02:55,120 --> 00:02:58,320 Speaker 1: because you're better people than I am. I don't know 55 00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:02,080 Speaker 1: how I would tape after going through what you guys 56 00:03:02,080 --> 00:03:02,680 Speaker 1: have gone through. 57 00:03:03,639 --> 00:03:07,280 Speaker 3: Family, I think Lloyd and Night. I think Lloyd gives 58 00:03:07,280 --> 00:03:10,000 Speaker 3: me strength. I give him strength. And we still have 59 00:03:10,120 --> 00:03:14,440 Speaker 3: our son and four beautiful grandsons, so you've got to 60 00:03:14,440 --> 00:03:17,400 Speaker 3: be there for them. We felt our world collapsed, and 61 00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:19,040 Speaker 3: then you think about it, well. 62 00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:19,840 Speaker 2: It's not just us. 63 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:23,080 Speaker 3: Our son's world collapsed too, and we all need to 64 00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:25,360 Speaker 3: be there for each other. And I think and I 65 00:03:25,400 --> 00:03:28,799 Speaker 3: think Hannah's still with us, pushing. She always was a 66 00:03:28,840 --> 00:03:31,120 Speaker 3: bit of a puppeteer, and I think she's up there 67 00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:32,200 Speaker 3: directing things. 68 00:03:32,400 --> 00:03:34,239 Speaker 1: She's still controlling that, I think. 69 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:38,400 Speaker 4: So yeah, definitely, yeah, But I mean we're just everyday Australians, 70 00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:42,600 Speaker 4: LU call Australians who unfortunately we're given a platform you 71 00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:45,640 Speaker 4: know that no one would want. We never wanted it. 72 00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:50,440 Speaker 4: But I just saw something there that well held the 73 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:53,320 Speaker 4: whole world scene this, This is absolutely shocking. Who does this? 74 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:55,880 Speaker 4: Who who is a sort of person does that to 75 00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:59,320 Speaker 4: their own children? You know. So we thought we need 76 00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:01,920 Speaker 4: to do something. And all these professionals were coming out 77 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:06,480 Speaker 4: and saying, oh, it's a typical coercive control, and I said, 78 00:04:06,720 --> 00:04:09,240 Speaker 4: what's coers of control? What the hell are they talking about? 79 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:11,680 Speaker 4: We didn't know anything about it. And then you know, 80 00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:13,440 Speaker 4: it was going, oh, well we need to change a 81 00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:17,120 Speaker 4: coercive control. Oh it's like a handbook, they're saying. So 82 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:19,560 Speaker 4: that's when well, we really need to start a conversation. 83 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:22,080 Speaker 4: Let's start talking, let's get people moving, let's try and 84 00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:25,280 Speaker 4: get a move and do something. And yeah, we thought, 85 00:04:25,279 --> 00:04:28,440 Speaker 4: well we'll do let's make a foundation and we'll start 86 00:04:28,680 --> 00:04:32,240 Speaker 4: raising money and we'll maybe do some education, but that 87 00:04:32,320 --> 00:04:33,760 Speaker 4: took a while to get come around. 88 00:04:33,800 --> 00:04:36,280 Speaker 1: And that's and we're going to talk about that in detail, 89 00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:39,320 Speaker 1: what you're doing, because it's impressive and such a testament 90 00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:42,040 Speaker 1: to the hammer and the children that they're never going 91 00:04:42,080 --> 00:04:44,279 Speaker 1: to be forgotten because of what you guys are doing. 92 00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:47,360 Speaker 1: But you made the point your average sort of knock 93 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:52,200 Speaker 1: about Australians. I'm looking at that function and I think 94 00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:54,240 Speaker 1: you actually said that to me. You said, look, we 95 00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:56,760 Speaker 1: don't know why we're thrust into this. You're the center 96 00:04:56,800 --> 00:04:59,960 Speaker 1: of attention of the huge function. There was politicians coming up. 97 00:05:00,080 --> 00:05:03,640 Speaker 4: I think the general attention seekers. 98 00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:06,719 Speaker 1: Well that's a sense I got, Like you're sitting there 99 00:05:06,720 --> 00:05:09,200 Speaker 1: and I'm thinking you two would just prefer to be 100 00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:12,320 Speaker 1: at the local pub, just having a quiet meal on 101 00:05:12,360 --> 00:05:14,720 Speaker 1: your own, rather than being the center of attention. But 102 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:18,040 Speaker 1: you put yourself out there, and look, I've got to 103 00:05:18,080 --> 00:05:21,600 Speaker 1: say it's remarkable and I never cease to be amazed 104 00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:23,720 Speaker 1: with people that I came across during my career as 105 00:05:23,720 --> 00:05:26,440 Speaker 1: a homicide detective. But people I sit down in the 106 00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:31,359 Speaker 1: podcast because I think, you how do you get yourself 107 00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:33,760 Speaker 1: out of bed the next day after something like this? Happens. 108 00:05:33,760 --> 00:05:36,880 Speaker 1: But so you said family, and I suppose that brings 109 00:05:36,880 --> 00:05:39,839 Speaker 1: it on. You can't just forget the rest of the people. 110 00:05:39,920 --> 00:05:42,040 Speaker 2: That's right to me, that's selfish. 111 00:05:42,279 --> 00:05:46,520 Speaker 3: I know I'm I cry every day, but I think 112 00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:48,600 Speaker 3: you need to be there for the rest of the family. 113 00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:50,640 Speaker 2: Everyone. We all need each other's support. 114 00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:56,440 Speaker 1: Really, I see with you two still being together because 115 00:05:56,600 --> 00:06:01,479 Speaker 1: I've seen trauma and things in family before, and you 116 00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:04,880 Speaker 1: made the point so that I'm there there for Lloyd. 117 00:06:04,960 --> 00:06:08,080 Speaker 1: Lloyd's there for me. Sometimes I would imagine you're in 118 00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:10,520 Speaker 1: the dark place and Lloyd's got to be the strength, 119 00:06:10,560 --> 00:06:13,560 Speaker 1: and then vice versas. Is that how it plays out? 120 00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:16,960 Speaker 3: It does, and we both understand. You know, I'll say loud, 121 00:06:17,320 --> 00:06:20,080 Speaker 3: yeah it's not a good day to day, and he 122 00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:23,279 Speaker 3: gets it, and he just lets me be, talks to 123 00:06:23,279 --> 00:06:26,239 Speaker 3: me if I want to talk, or and he doesn't 124 00:06:26,240 --> 00:06:29,200 Speaker 3: look at me weird when I just cry for random reason. 125 00:06:30,880 --> 00:06:34,000 Speaker 1: I think that's understandable. I'll say, and I don't use 126 00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:36,680 Speaker 1: the word beautiful very often on I catch killers podcast, 127 00:06:36,680 --> 00:06:39,640 Speaker 1: but I think your relationship is beautiful. And I'm not 128 00:06:39,680 --> 00:06:40,800 Speaker 1: saying you're beautiful, Lloyd. 129 00:06:41,640 --> 00:06:44,120 Speaker 2: We can only take it take it so far. 130 00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:46,800 Speaker 1: But what I saw that day, that you were there 131 00:06:46,839 --> 00:06:49,480 Speaker 1: supporting each other and that it's you know, it was 132 00:06:49,520 --> 00:06:52,279 Speaker 1: an inspiration. And I've seen some ship in my life, 133 00:06:52,320 --> 00:06:55,640 Speaker 1: but that, to me, I thought, Wow, impressive people. 134 00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:57,880 Speaker 4: So I think the other thing too, Gary. It was 135 00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:00,360 Speaker 4: just before COVID too. 136 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:01,719 Speaker 1: Yes, that's right. 137 00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:05,159 Speaker 4: So a couple of weeks out, all of a sudden, 138 00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:07,400 Speaker 4: the whole world is just shut down. We couldn't go 139 00:07:07,440 --> 00:07:10,040 Speaker 4: anywhere where. Everyone had to be locked indoors. So in 140 00:07:10,080 --> 00:07:13,640 Speaker 4: a way, that gave us time to grieve. We could 141 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:16,360 Speaker 4: do what we wanted to do. What we did every 142 00:07:16,440 --> 00:07:18,960 Speaker 4: day would get up of a morning, we had a 143 00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:21,760 Speaker 4: couple of dogs and get the dogs and go walk. 144 00:07:21,960 --> 00:07:23,880 Speaker 4: We do a couple of k's and we just went 145 00:07:23,920 --> 00:07:27,320 Speaker 4: further and further and that's all. And we would walk, talk, 146 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:31,640 Speaker 4: cry why is this happening? What are we going to do? 147 00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:35,080 Speaker 4: All those questions? We just sorted it out in the bush, 148 00:07:35,280 --> 00:07:38,239 Speaker 4: spotting Koala's wallaby here and there and having the dogs 149 00:07:38,280 --> 00:07:40,120 Speaker 4: with us. You know, so that gave us a bit 150 00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:42,320 Speaker 4: of solid I had no pressure. People couldn't come around 151 00:07:42,360 --> 00:07:43,720 Speaker 4: because everyone was locked down. 152 00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:47,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, that makes sense, because I did get the 153 00:07:47,320 --> 00:07:50,520 Speaker 1: sense that you'd been thrusty put on this platform, and 154 00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:52,880 Speaker 1: then that would have been the recheck that you could 155 00:07:52,920 --> 00:07:57,240 Speaker 1: just step away and he heal yourself. And it's interesting 156 00:07:57,320 --> 00:08:00,640 Speaker 1: that you say just doing the little thing getting up 157 00:08:00,720 --> 00:08:03,640 Speaker 1: each day, because I speak to people that suffer post 158 00:08:03,720 --> 00:08:07,520 Speaker 1: aumatic stress, whether it be military or police, and the 159 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:10,880 Speaker 1: narrative seems to be, you've got to just keep doing something. 160 00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:13,000 Speaker 1: You've got to start, you've got to get up in 161 00:08:13,040 --> 00:08:15,640 Speaker 1: the morning, you've got to get a routine, You've got 162 00:08:15,640 --> 00:08:18,240 Speaker 1: to just keep stepping forward. Is that the sort of 163 00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:19,040 Speaker 1: thing that you guys have. 164 00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:23,240 Speaker 3: Definitely, Yeah, it does help to keep that that routine. 165 00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:25,920 Speaker 4: Nothing too Bob Atkinson. I got in touch with us, 166 00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:28,680 Speaker 4: but well very early in the piece, and I want 167 00:08:28,680 --> 00:08:29,920 Speaker 4: to know where you could help, and he said, look, 168 00:08:29,920 --> 00:08:32,560 Speaker 4: I've got this book. Can I give you this book 169 00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:35,760 Speaker 4: to read? And it was about trauma and it was 170 00:08:35,840 --> 00:08:37,880 Speaker 4: very good. It's sort of put a few things in 171 00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:42,520 Speaker 4: perspective for me, you know, learning about how people moved 172 00:08:42,559 --> 00:08:45,960 Speaker 4: on from their kids being killed by gang members and 173 00:08:46,080 --> 00:08:49,040 Speaker 4: you know whatever sort So I thought, well, yes, you've 174 00:08:49,040 --> 00:08:51,160 Speaker 4: got to be like John Wayne, You've actually just got 175 00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:54,880 Speaker 4: to get up, pack your bag up, get on that 176 00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:58,120 Speaker 4: horse and start riding and you know, continue on. You 177 00:08:58,120 --> 00:08:59,880 Speaker 4: don't get over it, but you've got to move on. 178 00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:03,400 Speaker 4: You can't just sit there in a hole and just think, well, 179 00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:06,320 Speaker 4: life's doom and gloom. Let's try and make it a 180 00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:09,880 Speaker 4: better world. Our wills collapse, but let's try and make 181 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:13,600 Speaker 4: that it doesn't happen to anyone else. And the sad 182 00:09:13,600 --> 00:09:17,319 Speaker 4: thing was twelve months later Kelly Wilkinson went nearly the 183 00:09:17,360 --> 00:09:18,400 Speaker 4: same way. So we sort of. 184 00:09:18,320 --> 00:09:22,800 Speaker 1: Copycat it it must, and we've just come from one 185 00:09:22,840 --> 00:09:25,440 Speaker 1: that was on the north coast of New South Wales 186 00:09:25,920 --> 00:09:28,679 Speaker 1: recent times with the father's killed a two year old child. 187 00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:32,679 Speaker 1: I would suggest every time you hear that it would 188 00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:34,480 Speaker 1: reopen the pain again. 189 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:38,600 Speaker 2: It doesn't. I cry every time and sadly it just 190 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:39,680 Speaker 2: happens too often. 191 00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:42,320 Speaker 3: Way too often at the moment, but a woman every 192 00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:43,480 Speaker 3: four days I need. 193 00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:44,040 Speaker 4: To talk about it. 194 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:47,160 Speaker 1: Well. I think we now as a society and it 195 00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:50,440 Speaker 1: takes a Politicians react to the voice of the people, 196 00:09:50,559 --> 00:09:53,360 Speaker 1: sometimes a bit slowly, but I think they're understanding now. 197 00:09:53,440 --> 00:09:55,920 Speaker 1: The media have got hold of it. Enough is enough 198 00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:59,079 Speaker 1: with what's going on with domestic and family violence. We've 199 00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:03,480 Speaker 1: got a circumvent. So we'll we'll talk during this podcast 200 00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:05,439 Speaker 1: about your thoughts on the way that can be done, 201 00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:08,800 Speaker 1: and we'll have an interesting discussion there. Let's talk about 202 00:10:08,840 --> 00:10:10,719 Speaker 1: Hannah and the children first of all, because I think 203 00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:14,640 Speaker 1: they haven't been forgotten. They shouldn't be forgotten. Now, I've 204 00:10:14,640 --> 00:10:17,520 Speaker 1: got to say, in preparing for this and knowing everything 205 00:10:17,559 --> 00:10:20,760 Speaker 1: that I do about the matter, that Hannah was an 206 00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:21,600 Speaker 1: impressive person. 207 00:10:22,160 --> 00:10:24,640 Speaker 3: She was she had a smile that lit up a room, 208 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:28,160 Speaker 3: and she would put her troubles behind and put everyone 209 00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:31,079 Speaker 3: else's in front. She was always there to help people 210 00:10:31,120 --> 00:10:34,240 Speaker 3: if she could, and people didn't know what was happening 211 00:10:34,280 --> 00:10:38,360 Speaker 3: with her. I knew a fair amount, and as it 212 00:10:38,400 --> 00:10:41,800 Speaker 3: got worse, I knew more because she would ring me 213 00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:43,719 Speaker 3: up and she'd just had to get it off a 214 00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:46,800 Speaker 3: chest and vent to somebody, and which made it very 215 00:10:46,840 --> 00:10:49,000 Speaker 3: difficult for me to then be civil when I would 216 00:10:49,080 --> 00:10:53,320 Speaker 3: have to face him. But yeah, Hannah. People loved her, 217 00:10:53,400 --> 00:10:56,920 Speaker 3: and we were surprised after she passed how many people 218 00:10:56,960 --> 00:10:59,400 Speaker 3: came up to us and said, oh, Hannah served me, 219 00:10:59,480 --> 00:11:03,400 Speaker 3: and she at athlete's foot. Hannah sold me shoes. I'll 220 00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:07,040 Speaker 3: never forget her. She was so bubbly and she wasn't perfect. 221 00:11:08,120 --> 00:11:10,360 Speaker 1: None of us are, so none of us are. But 222 00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:14,000 Speaker 1: that comes across in the way that she conducted herself. 223 00:11:14,040 --> 00:11:16,400 Speaker 1: So did you see that in her personality when she 224 00:11:16,440 --> 00:11:19,920 Speaker 1: was a younger child like that? Oh? Yes, she always shining. 225 00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:23,679 Speaker 2: Watch me, watch me, yea. 226 00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:27,479 Speaker 4: I loved the stage, any stage were doing a cartwheel 227 00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:28,480 Speaker 4: or a twirl. 228 00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:30,120 Speaker 2: And yeah yeah. 229 00:11:30,480 --> 00:11:34,160 Speaker 4: And the kids, they were just wonderful. They had great futures. 230 00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:37,000 Speaker 1: Break it down with the kids three, four and six, 231 00:11:37,080 --> 00:11:40,200 Speaker 1: they start to show their personalities. Oh yeah, what do 232 00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:41,800 Speaker 1: we got? Break them down? 233 00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:46,600 Speaker 3: Ali was a real She was sassy, very sasy, very sassy, 234 00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:51,000 Speaker 3: like a grandma. Her and I now she would have 235 00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,400 Speaker 3: been eleven now we have been having some good arguments. 236 00:11:53,840 --> 00:11:54,240 Speaker 1: She was. 237 00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:57,160 Speaker 3: One day we were in the park and there was 238 00:11:57,480 --> 00:11:59,320 Speaker 3: it was a stork. It was in the distance, and 239 00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:01,600 Speaker 3: she said to me, there is a plover and I said, 240 00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:03,880 Speaker 3: I don't think it is hun I reckon. 241 00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:06,640 Speaker 1: I'd know, Nannie, she's checking you on. 242 00:12:07,040 --> 00:12:09,440 Speaker 3: And even her father, he'd storm out of the house 243 00:12:09,480 --> 00:12:11,560 Speaker 3: in a mood. She'd slam the door behind him and 244 00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:12,320 Speaker 3: don't come back. 245 00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:14,400 Speaker 4: Really, oh she was. 246 00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:18,320 Speaker 3: And he would FaceTime her after Hannah had left, and 247 00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:20,800 Speaker 3: Alia wouldn't want to speak to him. I would say, 248 00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:22,840 Speaker 3: you don't have to, but Hanrahud say yes she does, 249 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:26,440 Speaker 3: and ali one night's talking to him, she goes, well, anyhow, 250 00:12:26,440 --> 00:12:28,760 Speaker 3: I got to go wash my hair. No one knows 251 00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:29,800 Speaker 3: where that came from. 252 00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:30,960 Speaker 4: She just came out. 253 00:12:31,440 --> 00:12:34,679 Speaker 1: Maybe it came from Grandma. 254 00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:38,640 Speaker 2: She was just a madam. And Leanna was a cheeky monkey. 255 00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:40,640 Speaker 4: She was a little monkey. 256 00:12:40,720 --> 00:12:41,040 Speaker 2: Yeah. 257 00:12:41,120 --> 00:12:43,680 Speaker 3: I carried her everywhere up until the day she died. 258 00:12:44,480 --> 00:12:46,520 Speaker 3: And I used to say to her, how much longer 259 00:12:46,559 --> 00:12:48,079 Speaker 3: do I have to carry you for? And she'd say 260 00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:50,760 Speaker 3: till I'm seven. I have no idea what the significance 261 00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:54,160 Speaker 3: of seven was. Obviously to her that was a good age. 262 00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:56,800 Speaker 1: But she is not stupid. She was going to get 263 00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:59,000 Speaker 1: take the easy path as long as she could. 264 00:12:59,080 --> 00:13:01,560 Speaker 2: Before she had Ah always always conned. 265 00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:05,880 Speaker 4: And Trey, he was just a little ball of energy. Yeah, 266 00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:08,640 Speaker 4: his little legs going up and down and you kick 267 00:13:08,679 --> 00:13:14,640 Speaker 4: a football pass, you know for a three. He had skills. Yeah, 268 00:13:14,720 --> 00:13:18,000 Speaker 4: they all had their own little individual skills. Yeah. I 269 00:13:18,040 --> 00:13:20,600 Speaker 4: said Aliyah was smart. She was going to be a teacher, 270 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:21,520 Speaker 4: and see that. 271 00:13:21,559 --> 00:13:23,560 Speaker 2: She was very, very smart, very She could read better 272 00:13:23,559 --> 00:13:24,319 Speaker 2: than a father. 273 00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:28,480 Speaker 4: That used to be so funny. 274 00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:32,160 Speaker 3: He'd be reading reading to the other two little ones, 275 00:13:32,240 --> 00:13:34,360 Speaker 3: and she'd come along and say, oh, you're not very. 276 00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:34,679 Speaker 2: Good at that. 277 00:13:35,120 --> 00:13:36,000 Speaker 1: I have to correct him. 278 00:13:36,080 --> 00:13:39,720 Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, I mean Leanna was just a fascinator. 279 00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:42,240 Speaker 4: Should change her clothes three or four times a day. 280 00:13:42,520 --> 00:13:45,880 Speaker 2: Fashion stuff, isn't that? 281 00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:48,880 Speaker 1: Isn't it fun at that age, at that such those 282 00:13:48,920 --> 00:13:51,520 Speaker 1: early ages that they're showing their personality and you can 283 00:13:51,559 --> 00:13:53,760 Speaker 1: see you can almost go okay and no where this 284 00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:56,320 Speaker 1: is going to cause grief during the teenage years. This 285 00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:59,440 Speaker 1: is going to be Yeah, but you sound like you're 286 00:13:59,520 --> 00:14:03,040 Speaker 1: very close too, Like what were the dynamics and the family, 287 00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:04,600 Speaker 1: Like how often did you see them? 288 00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:08,280 Speaker 3: And a couple of times a week. Yeah, I had 289 00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:11,920 Speaker 3: them every Friday and Saturdays. 290 00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:13,880 Speaker 2: We often spent with them. 291 00:14:13,679 --> 00:14:17,160 Speaker 4: On Saturday morning gym class. Who we used to do 292 00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:20,560 Speaker 4: body classes with him. Actually he was a very good 293 00:14:20,600 --> 00:14:25,440 Speaker 4: gym coach, but just a total lunatic but knew his stuff. 294 00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:27,720 Speaker 4: Always sort of said, you need to move, you need 295 00:14:27,720 --> 00:14:29,000 Speaker 4: to be flexible, you need to be able to get 296 00:14:29,080 --> 00:14:31,520 Speaker 4: up and down off of the ground, you know, especially 297 00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:33,520 Speaker 4: as you get older. Because he'd get old, people come 298 00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:35,240 Speaker 4: and say, I just want to lift weight. Someone build 299 00:14:35,280 --> 00:14:37,520 Speaker 4: up my biceps. I want to cut down, he said, 300 00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:40,360 Speaker 4: But can you get up and down off the ground 301 00:14:40,640 --> 00:14:42,520 Speaker 4: easy enough? Oh, what do I need to do that? Well, 302 00:14:42,560 --> 00:14:44,520 Speaker 4: you need to do that for your kids, for your grandkids. 303 00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:47,520 Speaker 4: So it was good in that way, and the stuff 304 00:14:47,560 --> 00:14:50,520 Speaker 4: that we did was good. I really enjoyed it. But 305 00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:53,200 Speaker 4: it was just his carry on. He expected everyone to 306 00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:55,360 Speaker 4: be like an a grade football you know, or a 307 00:14:55,480 --> 00:14:58,320 Speaker 4: top athlete. But we just wanted to go there and 308 00:14:58,400 --> 00:15:00,200 Speaker 4: spend a bit of time, do a bit of fun. 309 00:15:00,680 --> 00:15:06,000 Speaker 1: And couldn't didn't have that emotional intelligence to understand what 310 00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:12,240 Speaker 1: people wanted. Just before we moved past Hannah and the children. 311 00:15:12,440 --> 00:15:16,320 Speaker 1: And another thing that came out the generosity of spirit 312 00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:19,240 Speaker 1: of Hannah in that even when things were going bad, 313 00:15:19,720 --> 00:15:21,880 Speaker 1: she still saw the importance of the kids having a 314 00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:25,120 Speaker 1: connection with the father and even had empathy for the 315 00:15:25,160 --> 00:15:29,200 Speaker 1: father that he's missing the kids and all that was 316 00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:31,760 Speaker 1: that her nature, that empathy very much. 317 00:15:31,800 --> 00:15:36,280 Speaker 3: So she really felt for him. She wanted to make 318 00:15:36,320 --> 00:15:40,600 Speaker 3: sure he had fifty to fifty care of the children. 319 00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:43,840 Speaker 3: She really pushed for that. But he played games, he 320 00:15:43,840 --> 00:15:47,080 Speaker 3: wouldn't return them on time when always half an hour 321 00:15:47,160 --> 00:15:49,320 Speaker 3: late because no one could tell him what to do 322 00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:53,400 Speaker 3: with his children, and then he started to misbehave like 323 00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:57,040 Speaker 3: that and she couldn't trust him. He would go off 324 00:15:57,040 --> 00:16:02,760 Speaker 3: with the children, not answer his Phonechristmas Day. He'd kept 325 00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:05,680 Speaker 3: the kids ransom for a couple of hours prior to Christmas, 326 00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:10,360 Speaker 3: and I forbid him to come Christmas Day, but Lloyd 327 00:16:10,360 --> 00:16:13,000 Speaker 3: and Hannah talked me down and said, he's the father, 328 00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:16,440 Speaker 3: he's entitled to be there. He should be there. I 329 00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:19,840 Speaker 3: thought he'd lost his chance. In my books, you get 330 00:16:19,840 --> 00:16:22,600 Speaker 3: one chance. But yeah, they took me around and he 331 00:16:22,760 --> 00:16:25,440 Speaker 3: was very good on the Christmas Day, I must say. 332 00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:31,600 Speaker 1: And it's interesting that you say that in the Lloyd 333 00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:35,200 Speaker 1: and Hannah saying, well, wish you would you say there's 334 00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:37,440 Speaker 1: no clear path, is there? No, it's a judgment. 335 00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:40,240 Speaker 4: I was about myself. If I was in his shoes, 336 00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:42,160 Speaker 4: I'd want to see my kids on Christmas Day. And 337 00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:43,640 Speaker 4: I thought, well, okay, he can come for a couple 338 00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:45,960 Speaker 4: of hours, I said. When I went around there to 339 00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:47,640 Speaker 4: see him, he said, well, come on in, and I said, no, 340 00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:49,240 Speaker 4: I don wan't come in. I said, I'm just telling 341 00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:52,240 Speaker 4: you now, you're welcome to come over for Christmas morning. 342 00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:54,880 Speaker 4: So the kid's going over in their presence, you be 343 00:16:54,960 --> 00:16:57,280 Speaker 4: there at six o'clock and or whatever it was, And 344 00:16:57,320 --> 00:17:00,920 Speaker 4: I said, you know, have a couple of hours, and yeah, 345 00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:03,920 Speaker 4: we couldn't get rid of him. He was there at eleven. 346 00:17:03,640 --> 00:17:07,640 Speaker 1: Hours doing the right thing. I think a warning sign, 347 00:17:07,720 --> 00:17:11,359 Speaker 1: and we talk about this domestic and family violence, is 348 00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:14,560 Speaker 1: when any partner, whether it's a female or the male, 349 00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:18,320 Speaker 1: starts using kids as manipulation in the relationship, that pawns 350 00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:21,960 Speaker 1: to him, and that to me, speaks so much about 351 00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:25,000 Speaker 1: the quality of the person, no matter what's happened in 352 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,320 Speaker 1: the relationship. The kids shouldn't be used as the pawns 353 00:17:27,320 --> 00:17:31,520 Speaker 1: in the relationship. And it's a warning sign, and it's 354 00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:35,119 Speaker 1: something that says something about the character of the person 355 00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:38,080 Speaker 1: that they're prepared to use the children as a bargainship. 356 00:17:38,160 --> 00:17:40,720 Speaker 4: Well, then the very next day, Boxing day, that's when 357 00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:44,320 Speaker 4: he kidnapped Layana. So he was very good one day, 358 00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:46,080 Speaker 4: but in the back of his mind, obviously he was 359 00:17:46,080 --> 00:17:47,720 Speaker 4: thinking what he was going to do the next day. 360 00:17:47,760 --> 00:17:49,600 Speaker 4: And I said, I'll take the kids down they got 361 00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:52,399 Speaker 4: skateboards and scooters for Christmas, take them down along the 362 00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:54,159 Speaker 4: river and they can ride him down there. We said, oh, 363 00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:56,440 Speaker 4: we'll come too. Then he said can I come along? 364 00:17:56,440 --> 00:17:58,840 Speaker 4: Wouldn't mind coming? So we said yeah, and we said 365 00:17:58,880 --> 00:18:00,680 Speaker 4: to hand and said we'll come. She said no, no, 366 00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:03,400 Speaker 4: it's fine. And of course, what as you do? He 367 00:18:03,480 --> 00:18:06,040 Speaker 4: just grabs Leana, shucks her in the car and takes off, 368 00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:08,680 Speaker 4: screaming out the window, saying, so you've done this, Hannah, 369 00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:11,800 Speaker 4: it's all your fault. 370 00:18:13,240 --> 00:18:16,800 Speaker 1: Okay. What when did he first become? When did they 371 00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:19,600 Speaker 1: first get together? And when did he start? When did 372 00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:21,840 Speaker 1: you first meet him? What were your impressions first? Up 373 00:18:22,440 --> 00:18:25,159 Speaker 1: Rowan Baxa would say his name? What were the impressions 374 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:26,480 Speaker 1: when they got together? 375 00:18:26,640 --> 00:18:29,600 Speaker 3: I didn't like him at first because he was eleven 376 00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:30,200 Speaker 3: years older. 377 00:18:30,840 --> 00:18:32,520 Speaker 1: How old was he and how old. 378 00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:34,240 Speaker 3: Was Hannah was twenty he was thirty one. 379 00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:38,160 Speaker 1: That's a big life game, Yeah, I thought, so, life 380 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:38,880 Speaker 1: stage difference. 381 00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:41,720 Speaker 3: And he was still living with his partner and child. 382 00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:46,119 Speaker 3: But I don't know whether Hannah said it to pacify 383 00:18:46,240 --> 00:18:49,639 Speaker 3: me or it's what she believed from him. It was 384 00:18:49,680 --> 00:18:50,840 Speaker 3: purely just for the child. 385 00:18:51,359 --> 00:18:51,560 Speaker 2: You know. 386 00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:55,080 Speaker 3: The relationship was long over, which we found out later 387 00:18:55,280 --> 00:18:59,920 Speaker 3: wasn't so. Yeah, and then he did he won us over, right, 388 00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:02,160 Speaker 3: He loved Bob. 389 00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:06,600 Speaker 1: Does yeah, Like now you look back at it and 390 00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:09,560 Speaker 1: it was manipulative or was that? Do you think it 391 00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:12,399 Speaker 1: was genuine when he said love Bob new he was 392 00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:13,400 Speaker 1: a perfect person for. 393 00:19:14,359 --> 00:19:16,720 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I think he well, he was out to 394 00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:21,080 Speaker 3: win us over. But he would invite us to dinners 395 00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,800 Speaker 3: and places, and Hanna would even say to me, I 396 00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:26,680 Speaker 3: didn't want you to come. I also don't ask him like, 397 00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:31,320 Speaker 3: but he would, so he eventually won us over. I 398 00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:34,040 Speaker 3: must say we thought he was lovely and we thought 399 00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:35,080 Speaker 3: he generally loved her. 400 00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:38,400 Speaker 1: What about Hannah's brother Nathan? How was Nathan at the time? 401 00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:39,199 Speaker 1: What was his sense of. 402 00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:40,320 Speaker 2: He would have been eighteen. 403 00:19:40,520 --> 00:19:45,000 Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, he didn't particularly like him, and they clashed 404 00:19:45,040 --> 00:19:49,639 Speaker 3: a bit, quite a bit. Because that's very good physically, 405 00:19:49,960 --> 00:19:54,240 Speaker 3: like in gymnastics and trampolining, and that was one thing 406 00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:58,080 Speaker 3: that Rowan always wanted to be like that. He was 407 00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:00,800 Speaker 3: very good at lifting weights and things, but not flexible, 408 00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:03,240 Speaker 3: couldn't do somersaults and flips and things. 409 00:20:03,359 --> 00:20:05,199 Speaker 1: And so he would a pride of himself on these 410 00:20:05,280 --> 00:20:09,320 Speaker 1: physicality and then young Nate it didn't appreciate it and 411 00:20:09,400 --> 00:20:10,800 Speaker 1: can do this and do that, and. 412 00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:14,400 Speaker 4: Nearly the same way. Can it nearly run the speed 413 00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:18,000 Speaker 4: and it could do flips, yeah, handing basults and stuff 414 00:20:18,040 --> 00:20:20,400 Speaker 4: like that. So that's what he wanted to do. So 415 00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:23,639 Speaker 4: he used them to help coach him and. 416 00:20:23,160 --> 00:20:24,960 Speaker 1: So he could get it right okay, And. 417 00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:27,359 Speaker 2: He was quite a show pony rant. 418 00:20:27,680 --> 00:20:30,040 Speaker 3: He'd be on the beach and once Hannah actually taught 419 00:20:30,080 --> 00:20:32,440 Speaker 3: him how to do a back flip and he would 420 00:20:32,480 --> 00:20:34,280 Speaker 3: do him on the beach and think he was hot, 421 00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:37,600 Speaker 3: hot stuff, and it'd be funny, and he'd say to 422 00:20:37,680 --> 00:20:40,840 Speaker 3: that you should do it, and now I'd be don't 423 00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:42,840 Speaker 3: need to And then in the end that would do 424 00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:44,400 Speaker 3: it and it would be better, and you could see 425 00:20:44,440 --> 00:20:46,200 Speaker 3: he really regretted he'd pushed. 426 00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:52,080 Speaker 1: To do it. Interesting, interesting dynamics. Very So how long 427 00:20:52,160 --> 00:20:55,439 Speaker 1: were they together before they got married and what was 428 00:20:55,640 --> 00:20:57,160 Speaker 1: the progression of the relationship. 429 00:20:57,880 --> 00:21:04,520 Speaker 3: They were together Probably four years before they married, and 430 00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:09,320 Speaker 3: that was he was prepared to propose to He actually 431 00:21:09,359 --> 00:21:13,680 Speaker 3: had a ring hidden in my cupboarde probably twelve months 432 00:21:13,680 --> 00:21:18,280 Speaker 3: prior to that. Didn't it before he actually proposed because 433 00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:22,600 Speaker 3: Nad ended up getting engaged and he didn't want to 434 00:21:22,640 --> 00:21:24,920 Speaker 3: follow on NAT's foots. It was all the thing. So 435 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:25,640 Speaker 3: he held off. 436 00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:30,120 Speaker 1: Did you, like, you have a relationship, You've got your daughter, 437 00:21:30,200 --> 00:21:34,119 Speaker 1: she's twenty. You're thinking, okay, well, maybe it'll just peter out. 438 00:21:34,320 --> 00:21:36,000 Speaker 1: You can't tell them what to do, so you've got 439 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:39,600 Speaker 1: to let it run its natural course. When it got 440 00:21:39,640 --> 00:21:41,879 Speaker 1: to the fact, okay, well they're making a commitment to 441 00:21:41,920 --> 00:21:45,320 Speaker 1: be together now in a marriage. Did that cause you 442 00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:47,880 Speaker 1: concern or did you think, okay, well maybe it will work. 443 00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:49,560 Speaker 1: What was going through your mind? 444 00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:51,520 Speaker 2: I thought it would work at that stage. I think 445 00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:53,840 Speaker 2: he wasn't showing his true colors. 446 00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:56,199 Speaker 4: Yeah, we didn't see any of those warnings side red flags. 447 00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:59,600 Speaker 4: I think you know, occasionally he had a road rage 448 00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:02,639 Speaker 4: fit while we're with him, and I thought, geez, got 449 00:22:02,640 --> 00:22:05,560 Speaker 4: a sharp temper. I didn't even need to crack off 450 00:22:05,600 --> 00:22:07,080 Speaker 4: at those people for that. You know, we'll get out 451 00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:09,320 Speaker 4: of the car and kick the door, you know, just 452 00:22:09,359 --> 00:22:10,840 Speaker 4: get in the car, mate, let it go. 453 00:22:11,480 --> 00:22:14,040 Speaker 1: Well again, the little little warning. 454 00:22:13,680 --> 00:22:16,160 Speaker 4: Side they were the things. Then further down the track, 455 00:22:16,240 --> 00:22:17,840 Speaker 4: three or four years down the track, I look back 456 00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:20,600 Speaker 4: and go, well, ship, I should have seen that. Yeah, 457 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:23,760 Speaker 4: there was little signs there. You know, there's rage that 458 00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:26,280 Speaker 4: just came out. And if he got beaten at the 459 00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:29,960 Speaker 4: gym doing awad, he'd find some excuse why he got beaten. 460 00:22:29,960 --> 00:22:32,600 Speaker 4: All the other one didn't count properly, didn't do their numbers, 461 00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:35,040 Speaker 4: so he was always he had to win. One of 462 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:37,320 Speaker 4: those people had to win at everything, and even playing 463 00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:39,800 Speaker 4: with the kids to be down the beach, came to 464 00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:41,760 Speaker 4: race and you'd have to trip them over and push 465 00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:42,920 Speaker 4: them over and beat them. 466 00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:43,919 Speaker 1: That's a shallow victory. 467 00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:46,960 Speaker 4: Come on, let him win once in a while. 468 00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:50,720 Speaker 1: Well maybe, and you know what we're what we're talking through, 469 00:22:50,760 --> 00:22:54,080 Speaker 1: and I you know, I think maybe people take these 470 00:22:54,080 --> 00:22:57,440 Speaker 1: things away. We talk red flags. We see them now hindsight, 471 00:22:57,440 --> 00:23:00,359 Speaker 1: it's a wonderful thing. But we talked and this is 472 00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:04,280 Speaker 1: later on where they manipulate the used children as a pawn. 473 00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:07,000 Speaker 1: But if you've got someone that's road rage, I've never 474 00:23:07,080 --> 00:23:10,000 Speaker 1: understood road rage. And people think I'm a cranky person, 475 00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:11,879 Speaker 1: but I haven't got time to get caught up in 476 00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:14,760 Speaker 1: road rage. And I'm always astounded why some people just 477 00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:18,440 Speaker 1: lose their shit because someone's made a mistake driving the car. 478 00:23:18,520 --> 00:23:19,119 Speaker 4: That's right. 479 00:23:19,280 --> 00:23:21,359 Speaker 1: So if people are listening, if you're looking at someone 480 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:24,880 Speaker 1: and there's road rage, will have a deeper looking what's 481 00:23:24,920 --> 00:23:28,399 Speaker 1: going on. There so they get married. The wedding passed 482 00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:29,080 Speaker 1: without incident. 483 00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:31,919 Speaker 3: He was very involved in the wedding. That shocked me. 484 00:23:33,320 --> 00:23:35,080 Speaker 3: Most men are quite happy to turn up on the day. 485 00:23:35,320 --> 00:23:37,600 Speaker 3: Leave me out of it, don't you know, I'll turn up. 486 00:23:37,680 --> 00:23:39,399 Speaker 1: I put my hand up for that one. 487 00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:40,000 Speaker 2: Oh no. 488 00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:43,480 Speaker 3: He was had to taste all the food, he picked 489 00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:44,520 Speaker 3: the venue. 490 00:23:45,359 --> 00:23:49,600 Speaker 4: All of it, and from ten to go elate because 491 00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:51,600 Speaker 4: it would have been not cheaper for us. Yeah, here's 492 00:23:51,600 --> 00:23:54,480 Speaker 4: ten K. You're going to America, get married over there 493 00:23:55,119 --> 00:23:57,440 Speaker 4: or whatever. No, no, no, we want to have this 494 00:23:57,600 --> 00:23:58,200 Speaker 4: big night. 495 00:23:58,280 --> 00:24:02,000 Speaker 1: And he doesn't. And I don't know him. I'm only 496 00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:04,359 Speaker 1: trying to get a picture of him. But he doesn't 497 00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:06,680 Speaker 1: strike me as a person that it would be for 498 00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:11,119 Speaker 1: his own sense wanting to be concerned about the wedding. 499 00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:12,680 Speaker 1: It's almost like he's putting on a show. 500 00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:13,880 Speaker 2: It was. 501 00:24:13,960 --> 00:24:17,080 Speaker 3: It was, especially in hindsight looking back, it was. It 502 00:24:17,119 --> 00:24:19,280 Speaker 3: was a big production too. 503 00:24:19,119 --> 00:24:22,200 Speaker 1: Look look how much I love. Look what a beautiful 504 00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:24,840 Speaker 1: person I am. I'm a romantic and yeah, the wedding's 505 00:24:24,880 --> 00:24:25,720 Speaker 1: just got to be perfect. 506 00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:30,679 Speaker 3: Until he opened up the wishing well the next day. 507 00:24:31,440 --> 00:24:33,880 Speaker 3: Oh geez, such and such didn't give us much, did 508 00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:36,159 Speaker 3: they oh, do you know how much they're worth? And 509 00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:37,240 Speaker 3: they didn't give us much. 510 00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:39,560 Speaker 1: As Okay explained. 511 00:24:39,640 --> 00:24:41,960 Speaker 4: Is that, Look, you had the wedding down at Kingscliff, 512 00:24:42,040 --> 00:24:45,560 Speaker 4: so people had to travel down spend it. That's against there, 513 00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:48,800 Speaker 4: you know, so you've been graced by their presence, You've 514 00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:50,879 Speaker 4: asked them down. You think you're not going to get 515 00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:53,240 Speaker 4: a whole a lot because you know you've made them travel, spend, 516 00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:55,800 Speaker 4: spend money, and then spend more money on you. 517 00:24:56,840 --> 00:25:00,320 Speaker 1: Well that might that might be another warning sign her 518 00:25:00,359 --> 00:25:03,680 Speaker 1: own rage and not gratitude for gifts given. Like that's 519 00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:09,000 Speaker 1: that's weird, isn't it? It certainly is. Was there concerns 520 00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:12,280 Speaker 1: that his demeanor or did the relationship change when they 521 00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:14,840 Speaker 1: got married in that I've got you now, I don't 522 00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:16,639 Speaker 1: have to impress, not straight away. 523 00:25:18,280 --> 00:25:20,919 Speaker 3: And Hannah was pregnant when they got married, as it 524 00:25:20,960 --> 00:25:28,720 Speaker 3: turned out, by accident. Actually, well she was up for 525 00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:31,200 Speaker 3: a new script of the pill and she said, he's 526 00:25:31,280 --> 00:25:34,520 Speaker 3: really old and I'm young. I'm not going to reknew 527 00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:38,359 Speaker 3: that the pill. She was wanting to have children and 528 00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:40,960 Speaker 3: she has I'm not going to feel pregnant that quick anyway, Well, 529 00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:45,040 Speaker 3: she was fourteen, so she was fourteen weeks. 530 00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:45,960 Speaker 2: Pregnant when they married. 531 00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:51,640 Speaker 3: And yeah, so Aliyah came along and things weren't too bad. 532 00:25:51,680 --> 00:25:55,159 Speaker 3: He was very proud of Aliyah. But again, he was 533 00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:58,160 Speaker 3: one of those fathers that everyone thought was wonderful. He'd 534 00:25:58,200 --> 00:26:01,080 Speaker 3: changed nappies when he was out. People would see him 535 00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:02,280 Speaker 3: do that. Didn't do a thing at home. 536 00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:09,560 Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, a show pony that coming across. The other 537 00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:10,439 Speaker 1: kids came along. 538 00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:14,040 Speaker 3: Hannah was pregnant with the Leah Leana. Sorry when they 539 00:26:14,080 --> 00:26:17,520 Speaker 3: opened the gym, and that's when things really started spirally. 540 00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:20,040 Speaker 1: Now and what I understand, they opened the gym together 541 00:26:20,119 --> 00:26:25,560 Speaker 1: and people gravitated towards Hannah. But rowan that it was 542 00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:28,000 Speaker 1: hard to get clients because of his demeanor or his 543 00:26:29,960 --> 00:26:32,760 Speaker 1: lack of emotional intelligence or understanding of human nature. 544 00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:35,280 Speaker 2: Yeah, he was like a drill sergeant at first. 545 00:26:35,359 --> 00:26:37,879 Speaker 4: Yes, they had a lot of clients. Everyone came. You know, 546 00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:40,119 Speaker 4: we had a big open day and he signed up 547 00:26:40,119 --> 00:26:43,080 Speaker 4: a lot of people. But unfortunately, he said, with that 548 00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:48,439 Speaker 4: drill sergeant attitude and not giving leeway, mate, do the challenges. 549 00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:50,680 Speaker 4: Even you don't get the big, big people in and 550 00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:53,280 Speaker 4: you know, train them down, you know, you know they're 551 00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:55,359 Speaker 4: going to come for twelve or pay for twelve weeks. Hey, 552 00:26:55,359 --> 00:26:57,200 Speaker 4: if they don't come, they don't come. I know you 553 00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:00,200 Speaker 4: didn't like that if you paid your money to have 554 00:27:00,240 --> 00:27:03,639 Speaker 4: an excuse not to be there. Yeah, which was just silly, 555 00:27:03,720 --> 00:27:06,439 Speaker 4: you know, like he still had numbers. You get him 556 00:27:06,440 --> 00:27:09,919 Speaker 4: paid for it. What doesn't matter, you know, Let's just 557 00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:12,199 Speaker 4: move on, you know, let them go and then do 558 00:27:12,320 --> 00:27:15,359 Speaker 4: it again and get more people in. I think we 559 00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:18,080 Speaker 4: worked it out right near the end. He didn't care 560 00:27:18,119 --> 00:27:20,119 Speaker 4: about that. He didn't care if the gym sort of 561 00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:23,400 Speaker 4: failed as much because it was his gym. He could 562 00:27:23,400 --> 00:27:25,640 Speaker 4: train when he wanted to train, and he could train 563 00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:28,679 Speaker 4: however he wanted to train. No one could tell him 564 00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:29,879 Speaker 4: what to do and how to do it. 565 00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:34,600 Speaker 1: So he was king, Yeah, I get a sense, and yeah, 566 00:27:35,040 --> 00:27:38,640 Speaker 1: he wanted to be the man like as in my gym, 567 00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:40,560 Speaker 1: look at me. Everyone that comes in is got to 568 00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:43,200 Speaker 1: look at him. And I've seen them in Jim, those 569 00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:46,200 Speaker 1: type of things, I reckon they're wankers that the struc around. 570 00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:48,440 Speaker 2: No one can be better than him. It was his gym. 571 00:27:48,560 --> 00:27:49,560 Speaker 2: He had to be top dog. 572 00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:52,600 Speaker 4: He had a problem with people who actually had earned 573 00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:54,439 Speaker 4: a lot of money, you know, who had money. Oh, 574 00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:55,600 Speaker 4: how did they get all that money? 575 00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:55,760 Speaker 1: Oh? 576 00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:59,439 Speaker 4: They should, you know. But he would like to, you know, 577 00:28:00,359 --> 00:28:03,320 Speaker 4: crawl up to them and get their money off them 578 00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:05,600 Speaker 4: and get give them vouchers or get to go to 579 00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:09,320 Speaker 4: their restaurants or stuff like that for free. But he 580 00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:12,439 Speaker 4: was always always hated people who had money because he 581 00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:14,760 Speaker 4: never had it. And when he got money, he was 582 00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:17,639 Speaker 4: just instead of paying bills. Oh, I'll shout coffee or 583 00:28:17,840 --> 00:28:21,600 Speaker 4: come on around, and he'd splash it around. And you've 584 00:28:21,600 --> 00:28:23,439 Speaker 4: got bills to pay first. And we'd walk out to 585 00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:26,560 Speaker 4: their house and Chandler and to build these letters hanging 586 00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:28,840 Speaker 4: out a letterbox, and we'd get them out and walk 587 00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:31,480 Speaker 4: in and go, I think you got some bills here. Oh, 588 00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:33,240 Speaker 4: and you can see they've been sitting there for a while. 589 00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:35,000 Speaker 4: I don't worry about that. If you don't look at them, 590 00:28:35,119 --> 00:28:37,040 Speaker 4: you don't need to worry about them. Hey, hang on, 591 00:28:37,400 --> 00:28:38,600 Speaker 4: you need to pay your bills. 592 00:28:38,680 --> 00:28:42,360 Speaker 1: Yeah, it makes sense. Look, we're not psychologists, obviously, but 593 00:28:42,960 --> 00:28:46,000 Speaker 1: it's starting to paint a picture, isn't it. It's this bravado. 594 00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:53,200 Speaker 1: It's very narcissistic in the way everything's about him. And yeah, again, 595 00:28:53,480 --> 00:28:56,280 Speaker 1: warning signs if people are looking at it like someone 596 00:28:56,360 --> 00:28:59,040 Speaker 1: that's It seems to me like he didn't want to 597 00:28:59,040 --> 00:29:01,000 Speaker 1: actually pay his due. Is he just wanted to reap 598 00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:04,040 Speaker 1: the rewards. And I want the people to look up 599 00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:06,760 Speaker 1: to him. And he's the man. He runs a gym, 600 00:29:06,800 --> 00:29:09,480 Speaker 1: he's got money, he's got life, he's got this beautiful wife, 601 00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:13,400 Speaker 1: he's got these kids, perfect relationship. It's a lot of 602 00:29:13,520 --> 00:29:15,600 Speaker 1: just pretense for us. 603 00:29:15,800 --> 00:29:17,960 Speaker 4: And that's what he went very well on social media. 604 00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:23,760 Speaker 4: Oh yeah, photos of having a great time with the family, 605 00:29:23,920 --> 00:29:27,080 Speaker 4: look at us and he had of looking good or whatever. 606 00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:31,000 Speaker 4: But he was very prudish though with her, like you 607 00:29:31,120 --> 00:29:32,960 Speaker 4: wear a bikini down the beach, but wouldn't let her 608 00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:35,720 Speaker 4: walk off the beach up to with the showers that 609 00:29:35,920 --> 00:29:38,880 Speaker 4: have a shower of shed to put something on again. 610 00:29:39,080 --> 00:29:41,320 Speaker 3: But he could photograph her in the bikini and post 611 00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:42,360 Speaker 3: it on social media. 612 00:29:42,840 --> 00:29:47,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, but that that shows and it's interesting. I didn't 613 00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:50,080 Speaker 1: think the conversation gave this way, But I'm fine. That fascinating. 614 00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:53,120 Speaker 1: The sense of the type of person he is, that 615 00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:57,800 Speaker 1: jealousy is just is shown there. Like if you're with someone, 616 00:29:57,840 --> 00:30:00,640 Speaker 1: you love someone, you celebrate their joys and all that. 617 00:30:00,680 --> 00:30:05,120 Speaker 1: But he wanted Hannah's mind. I owner, and I don't 618 00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:08,480 Speaker 1: want anyone looking at her away from me like that. 619 00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:13,680 Speaker 3: That's what she dreaded his birthday every year because he 620 00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:16,400 Speaker 3: would just be unbearable because a lot of the boys 621 00:30:16,440 --> 00:30:18,680 Speaker 3: would have a dig geez, mate, you're punching above your weight? 622 00:30:18,720 --> 00:30:19,680 Speaker 2: What are you doing with her? 623 00:30:19,920 --> 00:30:22,560 Speaker 3: And every year someone would say it, and that would 624 00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:24,000 Speaker 3: be oh, she dreaded it. 625 00:30:24,440 --> 00:30:26,800 Speaker 4: Really, I think that's where it was going because he 626 00:30:26,880 --> 00:30:30,000 Speaker 4: was getting older and slower. He was starting to worry 627 00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:34,160 Speaker 4: that Hannah was a lot younger, and then the things 628 00:30:34,200 --> 00:30:38,040 Speaker 4: started getting more He started more controlling as it went 629 00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:40,560 Speaker 4: from there. If you look, I suppose you sat down 630 00:30:40,600 --> 00:30:43,960 Speaker 4: to the timeline and I reckon, Like su said, every 631 00:30:44,000 --> 00:30:47,240 Speaker 4: birthday he'd get cranky and cranky, he's losing a bit 632 00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:48,080 Speaker 4: more hair, and. 633 00:30:49,680 --> 00:30:52,360 Speaker 3: Which Hannah would point out and he didn't like she 634 00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:53,320 Speaker 3: would find little. 635 00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:56,480 Speaker 1: So he had this like, to me, sounds like a 636 00:30:56,560 --> 00:30:59,920 Speaker 1: very insecure, fragile ego. But it was all Bravardo. But 637 00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:04,360 Speaker 1: there wasn't much substance under scratch scratch the surface, and 638 00:31:04,680 --> 00:31:08,280 Speaker 1: so everything was sort of attacking his sense. He's deluded 639 00:31:08,360 --> 00:31:12,600 Speaker 1: sense of self worth. Yes, yeah, well again, if people 640 00:31:12,640 --> 00:31:16,040 Speaker 1: are listening. We know people of this type, and you know, 641 00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:19,800 Speaker 1: if the relationships not right, don't don't go down that path. 642 00:31:19,960 --> 00:31:22,560 Speaker 4: Just like to say, people do know someone like that 643 00:31:22,640 --> 00:31:26,120 Speaker 4: who's working away, don't be a bystander. You stand up 644 00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:28,880 Speaker 4: and say, hey, let's go and have a conversation, let's 645 00:31:28,880 --> 00:31:30,480 Speaker 4: have a cup of coffee, let's sit down and have 646 00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:34,160 Speaker 4: a beer, whatever, But talk to them about it. It's 647 00:31:34,200 --> 00:31:37,360 Speaker 4: not cool. You know. We don't want society going down 648 00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:40,720 Speaker 4: the path that we're heading now where there's not a 649 00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:43,560 Speaker 4: really fair relationship anymore. People are just having to go 650 00:31:43,680 --> 00:31:45,160 Speaker 4: they going to be king or they want to do this. 651 00:31:45,840 --> 00:31:46,880 Speaker 4: What's happened to respect? 652 00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:50,120 Speaker 1: That? That respect is something? And I think and with 653 00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:52,760 Speaker 1: the conversation we had the other other day, Lord, we're 654 00:31:52,760 --> 00:31:55,160 Speaker 1: talking about you men have got to sit down with 655 00:31:55,440 --> 00:31:58,400 Speaker 1: other men and mate the way you're treating your wife 656 00:31:58,520 --> 00:32:02,520 Speaker 1: or that. It's not because invariably we stand back and go, oh, 657 00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:05,000 Speaker 1: it's sad business. This is the male way of dealing 658 00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:07,080 Speaker 1: with things. Like women get into the nitty gritty of 659 00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:11,120 Speaker 1: it in the conversations, but whereas men just go, it's 660 00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:13,320 Speaker 1: not real good unless we're confronted with it. Where we 661 00:32:13,400 --> 00:32:16,800 Speaker 1: have to step in. We tend to avoid those those conversations, 662 00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:20,000 Speaker 1: and I think, you know, sometimes things can be circumvented 663 00:32:20,080 --> 00:32:23,520 Speaker 1: if people get in there and call someone out for it. 664 00:32:23,640 --> 00:32:25,720 Speaker 4: He did have He did have a dig at me 665 00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:28,800 Speaker 4: when Hannah left. He said, mate, what didn't you come 666 00:32:28,800 --> 00:32:31,640 Speaker 4: to me and say something? I said, I couldn't. I said, 667 00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:33,520 Speaker 4: I tried, We tried it. I said, every time we 668 00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:35,160 Speaker 4: try and talk to you, I said, you just go 669 00:32:35,280 --> 00:32:37,440 Speaker 4: off the handle. So I think if you've got someone 670 00:32:37,520 --> 00:32:39,760 Speaker 4: like that, that's when you've got a red flag and 671 00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:42,280 Speaker 4: they really need to get help. So you've got to 672 00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:45,120 Speaker 4: get them to a professional person to try and help. 673 00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:47,120 Speaker 1: To get help. When did it get to the point 674 00:32:47,160 --> 00:32:50,320 Speaker 1: when and soe you said, Hannah started confiding in you. 675 00:32:51,320 --> 00:32:54,280 Speaker 1: When did it get to the point where you guys thought, Okay, 676 00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:56,640 Speaker 1: this is we've got problems here. This is getting out 677 00:32:56,680 --> 00:32:57,160 Speaker 1: of control. 678 00:32:57,520 --> 00:33:00,880 Speaker 3: After Leana was born, it was starting to about and 679 00:33:00,920 --> 00:33:03,360 Speaker 3: Hannah was getting ready to leave, and then she felt 680 00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:05,880 Speaker 3: pregnant with Trey, which I think she was in denial 681 00:33:05,960 --> 00:33:09,360 Speaker 3: because no one found out she was pregnant till after 682 00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:12,239 Speaker 3: four months, and I think she was not wanting to 683 00:33:12,280 --> 00:33:16,080 Speaker 3: be And it was and that trapter again, especially when 684 00:33:16,080 --> 00:33:17,360 Speaker 3: he found out he was having a son. 685 00:33:18,120 --> 00:33:21,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, I could imagine the ego would have gone in 686 00:33:21,200 --> 00:33:24,240 Speaker 1: the wayver drive. Yeah, my son's going to be everything 687 00:33:24,240 --> 00:33:24,800 Speaker 1: I couldn't be. 688 00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:28,400 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, Yeah. He was hard on Trey. Trey couldn't 689 00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:31,080 Speaker 3: be a silk couldn't. Yeah, and Trey was a mummy's boy. 690 00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:32,360 Speaker 3: You know, he's only little. 691 00:33:32,520 --> 00:33:35,560 Speaker 1: But again, that's a personality. I can see the mile away. 692 00:33:35,840 --> 00:33:39,600 Speaker 1: You're going to be bigger, stronger, Yeah. Yeah, Okay, So 693 00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:44,120 Speaker 1: stuck in that situation. Then again, this is just the life, 694 00:33:44,160 --> 00:33:46,520 Speaker 1: isn't it. This is the way things roll. And you 695 00:33:46,560 --> 00:33:49,560 Speaker 1: can understand Hannah would be trying to hang on to 696 00:33:49,680 --> 00:33:52,600 Speaker 1: some degree of hope that we can turn things around. 697 00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:56,440 Speaker 1: You've got three kids now. People are vulnerable in the 698 00:33:56,480 --> 00:33:59,320 Speaker 1: relationship like that, especially women, to walk away break up 699 00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:02,600 Speaker 1: with the husband. And you've got three kids to look at. 700 00:34:02,520 --> 00:34:05,479 Speaker 3: And you told your a bad mother, and you're going 701 00:34:05,560 --> 00:34:08,960 Speaker 3: to damage those children. You have no idea what damage 702 00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:11,360 Speaker 3: you'll do to those children to take them away from me? 703 00:34:12,080 --> 00:34:14,840 Speaker 1: Is that the that's the narrative that he was feeding 704 00:34:14,880 --> 00:34:19,280 Speaker 1: there and into a good person that can be soul destroying. 705 00:34:20,360 --> 00:34:23,120 Speaker 4: She was a broken, broken person. When she came to us, 706 00:34:23,480 --> 00:34:27,480 Speaker 4: she'd lost her strength, Like you know, she she made 707 00:34:27,520 --> 00:34:30,400 Speaker 4: that comment before she got killed. You know, I am 708 00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:34,279 Speaker 4: a strong woman. I'm better for being a strong woman 709 00:34:34,320 --> 00:34:37,359 Speaker 4: now and I'll get over this. But when she first 710 00:34:37,400 --> 00:34:39,120 Speaker 4: came down our house, I could see she wasn't the 711 00:34:39,160 --> 00:34:41,880 Speaker 4: strong Hannah that we used to know. He had beaten 712 00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:44,120 Speaker 4: her down over a couple of years, and you know, 713 00:34:44,280 --> 00:34:47,919 Speaker 4: just that constant barrage of look, move your fat ass, 714 00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:50,439 Speaker 4: or you know, you need to lose a bit more weight, 715 00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:52,080 Speaker 4: you know, and come home and say, oh, this place 716 00:34:52,200 --> 00:34:52,440 Speaker 4: is a. 717 00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:57,520 Speaker 1: Mess, attacking her self, estume every chance, and that that's 718 00:34:57,560 --> 00:35:00,359 Speaker 1: where and when we talk coercive control, that that's very 719 00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:03,480 Speaker 1: thing that we talk about. Yeah, beating it down doesn't 720 00:35:03,480 --> 00:35:06,960 Speaker 1: necessarily have to be physical violence because it's but that 721 00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:11,520 Speaker 1: emotional that control. So you saw her change from that. 722 00:35:11,960 --> 00:35:13,239 Speaker 1: What age are we talking now? 723 00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:17,799 Speaker 3: What's she was thirty one when he killed her, so 724 00:35:17,920 --> 00:35:24,359 Speaker 3: probably twenty seven twenty eight things were progressively and its 725 00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:25,040 Speaker 3: getting worse. 726 00:35:25,120 --> 00:35:27,319 Speaker 1: It should be such a great time in life, you know, 727 00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:30,320 Speaker 1: that should be Yeah, at that time, she's got the 728 00:35:30,320 --> 00:35:34,040 Speaker 1: beautiful kids and everything. When did she decide that she 729 00:35:34,200 --> 00:35:36,320 Speaker 1: had to take a step step away. 730 00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:38,959 Speaker 2: She was well before Trey was born. 731 00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:41,359 Speaker 3: She was kind of she'd made up in her mind 732 00:35:41,400 --> 00:35:45,800 Speaker 3: she was going, but it took another three years before 733 00:35:45,840 --> 00:35:49,399 Speaker 3: she actually had the guts. I suppose, and she knew. 734 00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:52,759 Speaker 3: I kept saying to it, you can come home anytime. 735 00:35:53,560 --> 00:35:56,279 Speaker 3: Oh mom, there's no room, And I made my bed, 736 00:35:56,320 --> 00:35:58,360 Speaker 3: I'm gonna lie in it, and I'm like, you don't, 737 00:35:58,719 --> 00:36:00,640 Speaker 3: you don't, And it was hard. 738 00:36:01,360 --> 00:36:04,040 Speaker 1: It saddens me because she just comes across as such 739 00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:06,000 Speaker 1: a beautiful human being and I can see all those 740 00:36:06,080 --> 00:36:10,720 Speaker 1: emotions from a decent, kind, nice human being, and yeah, 741 00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:14,360 Speaker 1: she's stuck in that situation. So how did she actually 742 00:36:14,719 --> 00:36:16,919 Speaker 1: muster up the courage to say this is it? 743 00:36:17,080 --> 00:36:18,000 Speaker 2: It took quite a while. 744 00:36:18,320 --> 00:36:22,040 Speaker 3: We prepared for a bit over six months we were preparing, 745 00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:26,360 Speaker 3: Wing got bunk beds in and Hannah actually started buying 746 00:36:26,400 --> 00:36:28,720 Speaker 3: some clothes she was never allowed to wear and screwing 747 00:36:28,760 --> 00:36:31,600 Speaker 3: them at our house. And she got her passport and 748 00:36:31,600 --> 00:36:34,680 Speaker 3: the kid's birth certificates and things which she was slowly 749 00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:35,680 Speaker 3: leaving at our house. 750 00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:37,280 Speaker 2: So she had us safe. 751 00:36:37,760 --> 00:36:40,200 Speaker 3: And there would be quite a few times she said 752 00:36:40,239 --> 00:36:45,319 Speaker 3: to us, Okay, this weekend, I'm leaving, and at the time, 753 00:36:45,600 --> 00:36:48,520 Speaker 3: she was starting to suspect he had listening devices in 754 00:36:48,600 --> 00:36:52,320 Speaker 3: the house because he took her away one weekend. 755 00:36:52,880 --> 00:36:54,239 Speaker 2: Had it, oh this romantic. 756 00:36:55,000 --> 00:36:56,920 Speaker 1: I don't know if there's any evidence of it, but 757 00:36:56,960 --> 00:36:58,920 Speaker 1: I wouldn't put it past someone like that with that 758 00:36:58,960 --> 00:37:03,000 Speaker 1: sort of obsession, that would have monitored her in some way. 759 00:37:03,120 --> 00:37:07,319 Speaker 3: They found eight iPhones in the house after Hannah left, 760 00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:09,160 Speaker 3: strategically put. 761 00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:11,720 Speaker 1: Around Yeah, that's scary, isn't. 762 00:37:11,520 --> 00:37:11,920 Speaker 2: It is? 763 00:37:12,320 --> 00:37:16,560 Speaker 3: And well she knew this one time before she left. 764 00:37:17,800 --> 00:37:21,239 Speaker 3: It was Torrian bro which is actually coming up. She'd 765 00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:25,839 Speaker 3: qualified to compete, which is quite a I think, and 766 00:37:25,920 --> 00:37:28,640 Speaker 3: he hadn't. He wanted to go individually, he hadn't qualified, 767 00:37:28,960 --> 00:37:30,759 Speaker 3: and she had for a team. So this was for 768 00:37:31,280 --> 00:37:36,480 Speaker 3: Torrium Pro Big CrossFit Games, and he hadn't qualified individually, 769 00:37:36,960 --> 00:37:39,520 Speaker 3: so he decided he'd be in her team, and she 770 00:37:39,520 --> 00:37:43,400 Speaker 3: didn't want him, And she was apologizing to one of 771 00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:46,960 Speaker 3: the team members while driving her home, saying, I'm sorry, 772 00:37:46,960 --> 00:37:48,040 Speaker 3: he's such an asshole. 773 00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:49,120 Speaker 2: Yeah blah blah. 774 00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:51,800 Speaker 3: Blah, And she got home and he had a go 775 00:37:52,000 --> 00:37:57,279 Speaker 3: d He knew what she said, and the excuse was 776 00:37:57,360 --> 00:38:00,680 Speaker 3: that Aliah must have been playing with Hannah's phone and 777 00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:04,279 Speaker 3: somehow sent it to him, and Hannah knew that was 778 00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:07,719 Speaker 3: so he dropped out of the team, thinking that would 779 00:38:07,719 --> 00:38:10,280 Speaker 3: mess it up for everybody. Hannah was at the gym 780 00:38:10,520 --> 00:38:13,479 Speaker 3: taking the five o'clock class in the morning. Hannah got home, 781 00:38:14,960 --> 00:38:18,200 Speaker 3: him and the children had disappeared and wouldn't answer his phone, 782 00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:22,840 Speaker 3: so she was hysterical. Rang me I came over and 783 00:38:23,680 --> 00:38:25,520 Speaker 3: she thought he may take the kids to the coast. 784 00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:30,000 Speaker 3: That was their happy place and our son and daughter 785 00:38:30,000 --> 00:38:32,760 Speaker 3: in law live at the coast. So Hannah rang Stacy, 786 00:38:32,800 --> 00:38:35,040 Speaker 3: our daughter in law, to say, could you keep an 787 00:38:35,080 --> 00:38:38,680 Speaker 3: eye out see if you see him? But none of 788 00:38:38,719 --> 00:38:41,440 Speaker 3: us realized Nat was back from the mines. He'd gotten 789 00:38:41,480 --> 00:38:45,080 Speaker 3: back a day early. Nat had answered the phone and anyway, 790 00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:47,960 Speaker 3: when Rowan finally came home, he said to Hannah, I 791 00:38:47,960 --> 00:38:50,960 Speaker 3: can't believe you called your mother and your brother. So 792 00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:53,960 Speaker 3: if he'd checked her phone, she died Stacy's number, but 793 00:38:54,040 --> 00:38:55,680 Speaker 3: he knew Hannah had been speaking to her brother. 794 00:38:55,760 --> 00:38:59,440 Speaker 1: Okay, so he was doing cover like trying to. 795 00:38:59,640 --> 00:39:03,480 Speaker 3: Listen and turning up at places where he shouldn't know, 796 00:39:03,560 --> 00:39:04,319 Speaker 3: and she was and. 797 00:39:04,800 --> 00:39:07,960 Speaker 1: Was there any suggestions so of getting police involvement in 798 00:39:08,040 --> 00:39:10,640 Speaker 1: this point in time, or did she was a plan 799 00:39:10,880 --> 00:39:15,400 Speaker 1: just to Okay, I'm out of here and I'm living 800 00:39:15,400 --> 00:39:17,920 Speaker 1: with my parents, or I'm going here, but our relationship 801 00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:20,920 Speaker 1: is finished. There was no involvement from police at that 802 00:39:20,960 --> 00:39:21,279 Speaker 1: point in. 803 00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:23,080 Speaker 2: I didn't want to. She would scare. 804 00:39:23,400 --> 00:39:26,880 Speaker 3: She was so scared any involvement would antagonize him and 805 00:39:26,920 --> 00:39:30,520 Speaker 3: make things worse. So and even when she had said 806 00:39:31,080 --> 00:39:34,600 Speaker 3: she was thinking of leaving to him it was for 807 00:39:34,680 --> 00:39:39,200 Speaker 3: a break, she would never say it was forever, okay. 808 00:39:39,719 --> 00:39:42,680 Speaker 1: And I understand that because I don't think she would 809 00:39:42,680 --> 00:39:44,160 Speaker 1: have been able to walk out the door if she 810 00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:45,439 Speaker 1: said I've never seen you again. 811 00:39:45,480 --> 00:39:47,120 Speaker 3: Oh no, because he said there was no way she 812 00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:50,400 Speaker 3: was to take his children, and that wasn't happening. But eventually, 813 00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:53,919 Speaker 3: after a lot of mistries, she was at the gym 814 00:39:53,920 --> 00:39:57,680 Speaker 3: early one morning and she was talking to Nicki and 815 00:39:57,719 --> 00:40:01,520 Speaker 3: lou two of her close friends, and she was talking 816 00:40:01,800 --> 00:40:03,680 Speaker 3: about she's got to go, how bad it was, and 817 00:40:03,719 --> 00:40:06,680 Speaker 3: then Nicki just said, well, is he at work this morning? 818 00:40:06,680 --> 00:40:09,120 Speaker 3: Because he was not going to work either so that 819 00:40:09,160 --> 00:40:11,279 Speaker 3: he could keep an eye on her, And Hannah said, 820 00:40:11,320 --> 00:40:14,880 Speaker 3: he's actually gone today, and that Nicki said right, Okay, 821 00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:17,200 Speaker 3: we don't need to do our gym class. Let's go, 822 00:40:17,920 --> 00:40:21,800 Speaker 3: and Nicki kind of took control. Hannah went into the house. 823 00:40:23,200 --> 00:40:24,919 Speaker 3: The kids were allowed she went and got a lear 824 00:40:24,960 --> 00:40:26,959 Speaker 3: out of school, and the kids were allowed to pick 825 00:40:27,080 --> 00:40:30,920 Speaker 3: two toys each and she left the house with three 826 00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:35,280 Speaker 3: garbage bags for the lot of them. And they left 827 00:40:35,280 --> 00:40:39,799 Speaker 3: Hannah's car at the local McDonald's down in Nicki's house 828 00:40:39,800 --> 00:40:42,279 Speaker 3: because he didn't know where Nicki left lived, and spent 829 00:40:42,320 --> 00:40:43,719 Speaker 3: the night at Nicki's house. 830 00:40:43,800 --> 00:40:46,160 Speaker 4: Okay, just in case if he had a tracker or something. 831 00:40:45,960 --> 00:40:46,440 Speaker 2: On the car. 832 00:40:47,360 --> 00:40:50,719 Speaker 1: Knowing the way that you guys have described him and 833 00:40:51,880 --> 00:40:54,920 Speaker 1: what we understand, he would have been in a fit 834 00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:57,880 Speaker 1: of rage at this. It was just he would have 835 00:40:58,160 --> 00:40:59,200 Speaker 1: just lost his shit. 836 00:40:59,200 --> 00:41:01,120 Speaker 3: Over the He was in a rage, and then it 837 00:41:01,160 --> 00:41:04,640 Speaker 3: resulted into sobbing uncontrollably. 838 00:41:05,080 --> 00:41:07,560 Speaker 2: He was ringing me all day. Do you know where 839 00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:07,960 Speaker 2: she is? 840 00:41:08,000 --> 00:41:10,239 Speaker 3: He was angry at first, and I was saying I 841 00:41:10,239 --> 00:41:14,520 Speaker 3: have no idea, and that he would ring me crying, Oh. 842 00:41:14,280 --> 00:41:16,680 Speaker 2: This is killing me. I need my children. 843 00:41:17,520 --> 00:41:20,680 Speaker 1: I mean. One of the many forums that have covered 844 00:41:21,160 --> 00:41:23,880 Speaker 1: Hannah's story, there was talk with how many people he 845 00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:26,200 Speaker 1: would phone and just cry and I think it might 846 00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:28,560 Speaker 1: have been said it on one of the shows that 847 00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:31,279 Speaker 1: he did. He found out that he'd phone people just 848 00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:34,440 Speaker 1: on the periphle and just tell them, making himself out 849 00:41:34,480 --> 00:41:36,320 Speaker 1: to be the good guy, the victim. 850 00:41:36,600 --> 00:41:39,279 Speaker 4: That's right. He played the victim very well, but he 851 00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:40,200 Speaker 4: was the victim. 852 00:41:41,280 --> 00:41:45,120 Speaker 3: People he disliked and hadn't spoken to for ages. He 853 00:41:45,320 --> 00:41:48,240 Speaker 3: ran to tell them his side of the story. 854 00:41:49,200 --> 00:41:52,960 Speaker 1: There's that. There's that clip that has been publicly shown 855 00:41:53,000 --> 00:41:55,879 Speaker 1: where he and Hannah are pulled over in the car 856 00:41:55,920 --> 00:42:00,319 Speaker 1: and the cars Reggie, which put my hand up, since 857 00:42:00,320 --> 00:42:04,239 Speaker 1: they've taken those stickers off those windows. Yes, bring back 858 00:42:04,280 --> 00:42:07,280 Speaker 1: the stickers. It'll save us all a lot of money. 859 00:42:07,520 --> 00:42:10,120 Speaker 4: But they were just not good at that. That would 860 00:42:10,120 --> 00:42:14,279 Speaker 4: have been probably the second or third time that time, right, Okay, Yeah, 861 00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:15,960 Speaker 4: he just let it go. And it was always her 862 00:42:15,960 --> 00:42:18,160 Speaker 4: car too, so they had two cars. And then of 863 00:42:18,160 --> 00:42:20,920 Speaker 4: course you would have seen that in the footage if 864 00:42:20,920 --> 00:42:23,000 Speaker 4: you picked it up. He goes, but it's her car. 865 00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:26,360 Speaker 1: Yeah. I just the way he reacted was just it 866 00:42:26,880 --> 00:42:29,640 Speaker 1: made me cringe watching it. And that's seeing him sort 867 00:42:29,640 --> 00:42:32,319 Speaker 1: of unfiltered. This is not the pretense he's put in 868 00:42:32,360 --> 00:42:34,960 Speaker 1: on and just yeah, not we're in it together where 869 00:42:36,120 --> 00:42:37,879 Speaker 1: it was your fault you did this. 870 00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:41,239 Speaker 4: And just he's your problem. Yeah, but what he didn't 871 00:42:41,239 --> 00:42:44,239 Speaker 4: realize he's the driver. Yeah, he's got to check that. 872 00:42:44,400 --> 00:42:47,920 Speaker 4: So he got fined, not her, And of course we 873 00:42:48,000 --> 00:42:49,839 Speaker 4: got called and said, oh, can you come and pay 874 00:42:49,880 --> 00:42:50,680 Speaker 4: you pay the rent. 875 00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:55,319 Speaker 1: Was there any concern of physical violence? Did she ever 876 00:42:55,360 --> 00:42:57,399 Speaker 1: say that he physically assaulted her? 877 00:42:58,920 --> 00:43:02,440 Speaker 3: Well, in my point of view was that I didn't 878 00:43:02,480 --> 00:43:05,680 Speaker 3: think it was physical violence. But he did break her 879 00:43:05,719 --> 00:43:08,719 Speaker 3: watch and he did throw her phone across the room 880 00:43:08,760 --> 00:43:11,440 Speaker 3: and things like that, which I have since been informed 881 00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:14,640 Speaker 3: that that is a form of physical violence. But he 882 00:43:14,880 --> 00:43:18,520 Speaker 3: never really hit her. He slammed a gate into her 883 00:43:18,640 --> 00:43:21,480 Speaker 3: leg when she was heavily pregnant with Leana because she 884 00:43:21,640 --> 00:43:26,359 Speaker 3: disrespected him. But he hadn't actually physically and that's what 885 00:43:26,400 --> 00:43:29,520 Speaker 3: she kept saying to me. But he's never hit me. 886 00:43:29,719 --> 00:43:33,600 Speaker 1: And therein lies the misconception that with all these domestic 887 00:43:33,800 --> 00:43:37,880 Speaker 1: violence situations and that yeah, it's got to be physical, 888 00:43:37,920 --> 00:43:39,680 Speaker 1: that we've got to see the woman with a black 889 00:43:39,719 --> 00:43:42,960 Speaker 1: eye too. What happened, she walked into a door. That 890 00:43:43,080 --> 00:43:44,520 Speaker 1: type of narraty. 891 00:43:44,280 --> 00:43:47,960 Speaker 4: That's what hit us so hard. Was why didn't we 892 00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:50,520 Speaker 4: know about this? Why do we know this? Coercive control 893 00:43:51,280 --> 00:43:52,200 Speaker 4: is so dangerous? 894 00:43:52,560 --> 00:43:57,040 Speaker 1: That coercive control and speculation here we're just sort of brainstorming. 895 00:43:57,040 --> 00:44:00,760 Speaker 1: But he seems like such a manipulation that he knows 896 00:44:00,800 --> 00:44:03,320 Speaker 1: that if he slapped her all there was a bloody 897 00:44:03,360 --> 00:44:06,040 Speaker 1: nose or a black eye, police are going to be involved. 898 00:44:06,080 --> 00:44:07,840 Speaker 1: He's going to be charged, he's going to be shamed, 899 00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:09,040 Speaker 1: he's going to be the wife beater. 900 00:44:09,280 --> 00:44:11,399 Speaker 2: All that he knew I would come after him. 901 00:44:11,719 --> 00:44:15,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, well I'd say there'll be a lot of fit 902 00:44:15,719 --> 00:44:17,000 Speaker 1: mates it might come after. 903 00:44:18,440 --> 00:44:22,640 Speaker 2: Right, Ok, yeah, so we're scared in kindsight. 904 00:44:23,280 --> 00:44:24,960 Speaker 3: I look back now, I actually said to him on 905 00:44:25,000 --> 00:44:28,160 Speaker 3: their wedding day, if you hurt my daughter, I will 906 00:44:28,200 --> 00:44:30,759 Speaker 3: hunt you down. There's no way you can hide. And 907 00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:32,839 Speaker 3: I don't even know why I said that. 908 00:44:33,440 --> 00:44:38,000 Speaker 1: But yeah, therein lies and the coersive is so manipulative, 909 00:44:38,120 --> 00:44:40,840 Speaker 1: Like it's not the dumb bloke that's lost his temper 910 00:44:40,880 --> 00:44:46,440 Speaker 1: and slaps someone and then gets charged, And it's control control. 911 00:44:46,800 --> 00:44:50,600 Speaker 1: It's about your image, the perceptions, everyone's perception. 912 00:44:50,560 --> 00:44:53,480 Speaker 4: And when you look at it, at his personality and 913 00:44:53,520 --> 00:44:57,640 Speaker 4: his demeanor. We've alsot of discussed about him. Yes, he 914 00:44:57,760 --> 00:45:02,040 Speaker 4: lost his shit, So he wasn't an irrational thinker. If 915 00:45:02,080 --> 00:45:02,640 Speaker 4: the kid one of the. 916 00:45:02,680 --> 00:45:03,880 Speaker 2: Kids, no lateral thinking? 917 00:45:04,040 --> 00:45:06,640 Speaker 4: Was that no lateral thinking, or that if one of 918 00:45:06,680 --> 00:45:09,360 Speaker 4: the kids hurt themselves he couldn't handle it. If Hannah 919 00:45:09,440 --> 00:45:11,279 Speaker 4: wasn't there, and if he was involved in playing a 920 00:45:11,320 --> 00:45:13,719 Speaker 4: game they hurt himselves, well he just lost it and 921 00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:17,200 Speaker 4: he would ring Sue. I think you know Aliah needs stitches. 922 00:45:17,239 --> 00:45:19,640 Speaker 4: You know, I threw a cushion at her and she's 923 00:45:19,719 --> 00:45:21,839 Speaker 4: running down the hall and she it hit her and 924 00:45:21,920 --> 00:45:24,279 Speaker 4: she hit her head in the door jam. You know, 925 00:45:24,719 --> 00:45:27,000 Speaker 4: he just oh, I got blood everywhere. What can I do? 926 00:45:27,520 --> 00:45:29,840 Speaker 3: I got I arrived over there, he rang me, I 927 00:45:30,040 --> 00:45:35,160 Speaker 3: left work, got over there. He's sitting on the floor rocking, 928 00:45:35,239 --> 00:45:39,040 Speaker 3: crying while the pool kids just holding something on her head. 929 00:45:39,120 --> 00:45:41,200 Speaker 3: So yeah, I had to take control of the pool 930 00:45:41,239 --> 00:45:42,600 Speaker 3: kid because he said to me, can you come? 931 00:45:42,680 --> 00:45:43,160 Speaker 2: Can you come? 932 00:45:43,280 --> 00:45:44,840 Speaker 3: Because Hannah was at the gym, and he said, she 933 00:45:44,880 --> 00:45:48,319 Speaker 3: only wants you because she wanted mum. But Hannah wasn't there, 934 00:45:48,360 --> 00:45:49,239 Speaker 3: so then she wanted me. 935 00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:54,239 Speaker 1: Okay, So Hannah's moved out with the kids, stayed at 936 00:45:54,280 --> 00:45:56,840 Speaker 1: the friend's place. When did make an official. Was she 937 00:45:56,960 --> 00:45:58,480 Speaker 1: staying with you guys or what? 938 00:45:58,480 --> 00:45:59,080 Speaker 4: What was it? 939 00:45:59,320 --> 00:46:02,239 Speaker 3: She the next next day moved into our place. That 940 00:46:02,400 --> 00:46:05,600 Speaker 3: was a Saturday. 941 00:46:03,640 --> 00:46:05,759 Speaker 1: Signing the sulky phone calls from him. 942 00:46:05,840 --> 00:46:06,840 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yep. 943 00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:09,759 Speaker 3: So she moved in on the Saturday with us. And 944 00:46:09,800 --> 00:46:14,120 Speaker 3: then this Sunday she was talking to him on the 945 00:46:14,160 --> 00:46:16,960 Speaker 3: phone and she said to me, I'm going to go 946 00:46:17,000 --> 00:46:18,960 Speaker 3: and have a coffee with him, And I'm like, are 947 00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:21,880 Speaker 3: you sure? Yeah, yeah, it'll be all right. So anyway, 948 00:46:22,239 --> 00:46:24,880 Speaker 3: they went and had a coffee. Next thing, she comes 949 00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:28,279 Speaker 3: back with him and it's like, oh, let's all have 950 00:46:28,360 --> 00:46:30,359 Speaker 3: tie for dinner, and Lord and I are looking at 951 00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:34,719 Speaker 3: each other, and anyway, Lloyd and him went out and 952 00:46:34,760 --> 00:46:37,120 Speaker 3: bought the tie. And I said to Hena, are you okacious? No, 953 00:46:37,160 --> 00:46:39,879 Speaker 3: I'm not, she said, but I'll go home with him 954 00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:44,400 Speaker 3: tonight and then in the morning when he's at the gym, 955 00:46:44,440 --> 00:46:47,680 Speaker 3: I'm going for good. So I don't know why she 956 00:46:47,840 --> 00:46:51,160 Speaker 3: felt she had to go back that night and she 957 00:46:51,200 --> 00:46:53,120 Speaker 3: was begging me to go to the gym so that 958 00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:54,080 Speaker 3: things look normal. 959 00:46:55,000 --> 00:46:56,080 Speaker 2: And yeah, she. 960 00:46:56,040 --> 00:46:59,760 Speaker 3: Went home that night with the kids, and the next morning, 961 00:47:00,320 --> 00:47:01,960 Speaker 3: as soon as he left at five in the morning, 962 00:47:02,040 --> 00:47:04,160 Speaker 3: she was up and drove down to her brother's house 963 00:47:04,320 --> 00:47:06,680 Speaker 3: and stayed there for about three days. 964 00:47:06,960 --> 00:47:10,600 Speaker 1: That's again it goes in and you talked about the 965 00:47:10,640 --> 00:47:13,400 Speaker 1: self esteem being chipped away with all the negative comments, 966 00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:16,120 Speaker 1: that he'd throw it there and he still had control 967 00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:18,560 Speaker 1: that just come back for one night, we can talk 968 00:47:18,600 --> 00:47:20,880 Speaker 1: about it, and you can see how people weaken to that. 969 00:47:21,360 --> 00:47:24,520 Speaker 3: Well, while she was out of brother's, she just put 970 00:47:24,520 --> 00:47:27,120 Speaker 3: the kids down to have a sleep and he rang 971 00:47:27,160 --> 00:47:30,080 Speaker 3: her and Nat turned around and she's picking all this 972 00:47:30,200 --> 00:47:32,480 Speaker 3: stuff up frantically, and he said, what are you doing. 973 00:47:33,160 --> 00:47:34,640 Speaker 3: She said, I've got to go home. He said, I 974 00:47:34,719 --> 00:47:37,000 Speaker 3: have to go home. I've got to bring the kids hi, 975 00:47:37,440 --> 00:47:39,520 Speaker 3: And I said, no, you don't have to go anywhere, 976 00:47:40,000 --> 00:47:43,319 Speaker 3: and he kept her there. But I liken it to 977 00:47:43,400 --> 00:47:47,720 Speaker 3: almost like an alcoholic the victims. I could hear Hannah 978 00:47:47,760 --> 00:47:51,000 Speaker 3: on the phone to him, and I could hear her weakening, 979 00:47:51,760 --> 00:47:53,440 Speaker 3: almost like you have to have that drink. 980 00:47:53,600 --> 00:47:55,520 Speaker 2: It was. And I would say to. 981 00:47:55,480 --> 00:47:58,799 Speaker 3: Her, if he rings you and you feel you've got 982 00:47:58,800 --> 00:48:01,799 Speaker 3: to go back to him, wring me or Nikki and 983 00:48:01,840 --> 00:48:03,479 Speaker 3: we will almost talk you down. 984 00:48:03,800 --> 00:48:06,640 Speaker 1: But I think that's that's a valid point. So I 985 00:48:06,680 --> 00:48:09,799 Speaker 1: think they are broken down they're almost addicted to that 986 00:48:10,160 --> 00:48:13,840 Speaker 1: toxic drama that has been their life. 987 00:48:13,960 --> 00:48:14,960 Speaker 2: That's right control. 988 00:48:15,360 --> 00:48:18,960 Speaker 4: What they say is gospel, what they think, but they 989 00:48:18,960 --> 00:48:21,040 Speaker 4: don't realize because they've been beaten down and it's been 990 00:48:21,200 --> 00:48:23,920 Speaker 4: drummed into them. You're no good. You can't live without me. 991 00:48:24,040 --> 00:48:26,080 Speaker 4: The kids can't live without me. They need their father. 992 00:48:26,520 --> 00:48:29,120 Speaker 4: You know, I am the best you know and where you. 993 00:48:29,120 --> 00:48:32,680 Speaker 1: Go and everything that I understand about Hannah tells me 994 00:48:32,920 --> 00:48:38,319 Speaker 1: she's not that person. But that's how destructive that type 995 00:48:38,360 --> 00:48:39,799 Speaker 1: of manipulation can be. 996 00:48:40,400 --> 00:48:42,680 Speaker 4: What happened was at the end is she finally put 997 00:48:42,680 --> 00:48:44,560 Speaker 4: that wall up. She learned to put that wall up 998 00:48:44,760 --> 00:48:46,960 Speaker 4: and say, no, I'm a strong woman. I'm not going 999 00:48:47,040 --> 00:48:49,319 Speaker 4: back to you. You're never going to have me. And 1000 00:48:49,360 --> 00:48:51,239 Speaker 4: I don't ever think she ever said that to him, 1001 00:48:51,400 --> 00:48:53,719 Speaker 4: because there's always we'll just let it, give it six 1002 00:48:53,800 --> 00:48:56,680 Speaker 4: months and by then we're hoping you'd meet someone else 1003 00:48:56,719 --> 00:49:01,320 Speaker 4: and move on. But she got to that point and 1004 00:49:01,520 --> 00:49:05,160 Speaker 4: I think he just started spiraling. Then he realized he 1005 00:49:05,320 --> 00:49:08,360 Speaker 4: wasn't going to get it back. Yeah, all the kids. 1006 00:49:09,080 --> 00:49:11,520 Speaker 4: So then that's when he formulated his plan. It was 1007 00:49:11,560 --> 00:49:13,840 Speaker 4: all pre meditated. It wasn't a spur of the moment 1008 00:49:14,560 --> 00:49:16,680 Speaker 4: sort of thing. It was pre meditated what he did. 1009 00:49:18,080 --> 00:49:20,760 Speaker 1: Hey, guys, have you ever wondered what goes on behind 1010 00:49:20,760 --> 00:49:23,160 Speaker 1: the headlines of a gang more or shooting, Then you 1011 00:49:23,239 --> 00:49:26,399 Speaker 1: need to listen to crim City. Join crime reporters Mark 1012 00:49:26,520 --> 00:49:29,520 Speaker 1: Murray and Josh Hamrahan as they uncover the details of 1013 00:49:29,560 --> 00:49:32,719 Speaker 1: crimes unfolding on Sydney streets and share the stories that 1014 00:49:32,760 --> 00:49:35,600 Speaker 1: don't make the papers. The latest season of crim City 1015 00:49:35,719 --> 00:49:38,520 Speaker 1: is out now. Listen early and ad free on Crime 1016 00:49:38,719 --> 00:49:43,480 Speaker 1: x plus on Apple Podcasts Today Police Involvement. Then, I 1017 00:49:43,680 --> 00:49:45,959 Speaker 1: was heartened by the fact that there was some good 1018 00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:49,040 Speaker 1: commentary about when Hannah went to the police, that someone 1019 00:49:49,160 --> 00:49:52,680 Speaker 1: fully understood what was going on, because I cringe, and 1020 00:49:52,719 --> 00:49:55,120 Speaker 1: I think we're at the point where we've improved with 1021 00:49:55,239 --> 00:49:58,640 Speaker 1: policing a talk across the country where someone walks in, well, 1022 00:49:58,640 --> 00:50:01,120 Speaker 1: there's nothing we can really do. People are starting to 1023 00:50:01,200 --> 00:50:04,600 Speaker 1: understand the dramatic effect that domestic and family violence. But 1024 00:50:04,920 --> 00:50:07,120 Speaker 1: do you want to tell us about the when she 1025 00:50:07,160 --> 00:50:10,000 Speaker 1: went to the police, and she was very buoyed by 1026 00:50:10,000 --> 00:50:12,399 Speaker 1: the fact that the police officer seemed to understand and care. 1027 00:50:12,600 --> 00:50:13,480 Speaker 2: She certainly was. 1028 00:50:13,640 --> 00:50:17,160 Speaker 3: I wanted her to go and get a DVO as 1029 00:50:17,160 --> 00:50:20,640 Speaker 3: we call them in Queensland out on him the day 1030 00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:24,080 Speaker 3: she came back and moved into our place, and she 1031 00:50:24,120 --> 00:50:26,600 Speaker 3: was so scared that would antagonize him, but I managed 1032 00:50:26,640 --> 00:50:28,480 Speaker 3: to talk her into at least as at least go 1033 00:50:28,680 --> 00:50:31,200 Speaker 3: up to the police station, talk to the police, see 1034 00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:34,160 Speaker 3: what you can do when you know, and if you 1035 00:50:34,200 --> 00:50:37,200 Speaker 3: have a case. And he got a lovely young policewoman 1036 00:50:37,239 --> 00:50:40,359 Speaker 3: at the front desk who I suspect may have been 1037 00:50:40,400 --> 00:50:42,759 Speaker 3: a victim at one stage in her life herself, so 1038 00:50:42,800 --> 00:50:47,560 Speaker 3: she really understood what was going on. And Anna was 1039 00:50:47,600 --> 00:50:50,200 Speaker 3: telling her about being forced to have sex every night 1040 00:50:50,360 --> 00:50:53,440 Speaker 3: and she was like, oh honey, that's rape. You know, 1041 00:50:53,480 --> 00:50:56,480 Speaker 3: you could have him for rape, and she was writing 1042 00:50:56,520 --> 00:51:01,040 Speaker 3: it all down and she was so wonderful. She agreed 1043 00:51:01,120 --> 00:51:03,680 Speaker 3: not to do a DVO, though she did tell Hannah 1044 00:51:03,719 --> 00:51:07,120 Speaker 3: she had plenty of grounds to take one out. And 1045 00:51:07,960 --> 00:51:10,880 Speaker 3: this police woman also worked at police beat at the 1046 00:51:10,880 --> 00:51:14,080 Speaker 3: local shopping center and she would pop in and check 1047 00:51:14,120 --> 00:51:17,480 Speaker 3: it on Hannah at work regularly to see how she was. 1048 00:51:18,320 --> 00:51:20,680 Speaker 3: And Hannah came home after that first visit and said 1049 00:51:20,680 --> 00:51:23,560 Speaker 3: to me, she believed everything I said, Mum, and I'm 1050 00:51:23,600 --> 00:51:26,680 Speaker 3: not going crazy, and you know I have I can 1051 00:51:26,800 --> 00:51:28,399 Speaker 3: charge him with rape, and she was just. 1052 00:51:29,480 --> 00:51:32,400 Speaker 1: It's interesting that that was Hannah's thought process. And I 1053 00:51:32,400 --> 00:51:35,120 Speaker 1: can understand someone if they'd been beaten down like Hannah 1054 00:51:35,120 --> 00:51:38,080 Speaker 1: had been and just manipulated, you start thinking, am I 1055 00:51:38,200 --> 00:51:40,439 Speaker 1: just making this up? Am I just? Am I looking 1056 00:51:40,480 --> 00:51:43,160 Speaker 1: for something more in the relationship. That's just not normal. 1057 00:51:43,640 --> 00:51:46,719 Speaker 3: But you've been told that too. Yeah, yeah, perpetrators And 1058 00:51:46,760 --> 00:51:49,439 Speaker 3: he was good at it. He would do something, and 1059 00:51:49,480 --> 00:51:52,560 Speaker 3: if Hannah then bought it up, it was, oh, that's 1060 00:51:52,640 --> 00:51:54,799 Speaker 3: not what happened. No, I didn't do that. 1061 00:51:55,920 --> 00:52:00,239 Speaker 1: So then you start a second guest. Yeah, okay, So 1062 00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:04,960 Speaker 1: the situation where it got to the point where Hannah 1063 00:52:05,040 --> 00:52:09,160 Speaker 1: was killed and three children were killed, was there something 1064 00:52:09,239 --> 00:52:11,440 Speaker 1: that was a catalyst for that that you think looking 1065 00:52:11,480 --> 00:52:13,279 Speaker 1: at what happened, what stirred that on? 1066 00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:18,080 Speaker 3: All I can think of is we'd had a great 1067 00:52:18,400 --> 00:52:21,520 Speaker 3: on the Saturday. We'd had a great family day down 1068 00:52:21,520 --> 00:52:24,920 Speaker 3: at SeaWorld, the whole family, and Hannah had posted it 1069 00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:28,640 Speaker 3: and how wonderful things were. And I don't know, he 1070 00:52:28,719 --> 00:52:30,480 Speaker 3: seemed quite upset after that. 1071 00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:37,480 Speaker 4: Well, after when the inquest was on, some facts came 1072 00:52:37,480 --> 00:52:40,040 Speaker 4: out there that we didn't know about. And one was 1073 00:52:40,120 --> 00:52:43,919 Speaker 4: they found this message on his in his notes. Yes, 1074 00:52:44,280 --> 00:52:45,279 Speaker 4: that was dated back and. 1075 00:52:45,239 --> 00:52:47,440 Speaker 2: It was like Australia date Australia. 1076 00:52:47,520 --> 00:52:49,560 Speaker 4: But it was like, oh well you call it a 1077 00:52:49,920 --> 00:52:50,200 Speaker 4: not a. 1078 00:52:50,160 --> 00:52:55,080 Speaker 3: Confession, no more of it was almost a suicide note from. 1079 00:52:55,480 --> 00:52:59,399 Speaker 1: Dying declaration or from Hannah. Yeah, okay, well I'll put 1080 00:52:59,440 --> 00:53:02,040 Speaker 1: my homicide had on there that then he's thinking of 1081 00:53:02,080 --> 00:53:03,359 Speaker 1: it at that time. 1082 00:53:03,520 --> 00:53:09,000 Speaker 3: It was written all about I'm sorry, you'll be I'm sorry, 1083 00:53:09,000 --> 00:53:12,040 Speaker 3: the children still love you, Hannah, but you've bought this 1084 00:53:12,200 --> 00:53:16,399 Speaker 3: on yourself, something like this, and so we weren't sure 1085 00:53:16,719 --> 00:53:20,719 Speaker 3: it was nobody was going to leave because he killed 1086 00:53:20,719 --> 00:53:23,840 Speaker 3: the kids or killed her, but it seemed like it 1087 00:53:23,880 --> 00:53:24,560 Speaker 3: was going to kill her. 1088 00:53:24,560 --> 00:53:28,480 Speaker 1: And that was because the day that he killed Hannah 1089 00:53:28,520 --> 00:53:31,560 Speaker 1: and the children was nineenth of February. Yeah, and so 1090 00:53:31,680 --> 00:53:35,000 Speaker 1: we're talking Australia day twenty sixth of January, and he's 1091 00:53:35,040 --> 00:53:36,919 Speaker 1: got these thoughts in his head at that. 1092 00:53:37,400 --> 00:53:38,560 Speaker 2: Which none of us were aware. 1093 00:53:38,560 --> 00:53:42,520 Speaker 1: The police found that, and we can only speculate what's 1094 00:53:42,560 --> 00:53:44,839 Speaker 1: going through his mind, but there was certainly something going 1095 00:53:44,840 --> 00:53:46,680 Speaker 1: through his mind at that point in time. 1096 00:53:46,920 --> 00:53:48,959 Speaker 4: So that's what I think he realized that he wasn't 1097 00:53:48,960 --> 00:53:52,000 Speaker 4: going to get Hannah back. She was She's had this wall. 1098 00:53:52,080 --> 00:53:56,319 Speaker 4: Now she's strong, she's got the kids. And the thing 1099 00:53:56,440 --> 00:53:59,040 Speaker 4: is that he was never ever not going to be 1100 00:53:59,080 --> 00:54:02,160 Speaker 4: able to see the kids. He just why could he 1101 00:54:02,239 --> 00:54:04,440 Speaker 4: not just let them live their own life and he 1102 00:54:04,600 --> 00:54:06,680 Speaker 4: have his life and still see the kids and be 1103 00:54:06,800 --> 00:54:10,239 Speaker 4: part of their lives. But he had to have this 1104 00:54:10,280 --> 00:54:13,160 Speaker 4: one hundred percent, Like he said, I want the kids 1105 00:54:13,200 --> 00:54:15,360 Speaker 4: one hundred percent. How are you going to survive? How 1106 00:54:15,400 --> 00:54:16,279 Speaker 4: are you going to do that? 1107 00:54:16,360 --> 00:54:18,920 Speaker 3: And I was I'd actually said to him when he 1108 00:54:18,960 --> 00:54:21,120 Speaker 3: had the children, I would be more than happy to 1109 00:54:21,120 --> 00:54:23,399 Speaker 3: be there to support him if he needed anything done 1110 00:54:23,480 --> 00:54:23,920 Speaker 3: to help. 1111 00:54:24,480 --> 00:54:28,799 Speaker 4: He wasn't seeing things, you know laterally, so that's I mean, 1112 00:54:28,840 --> 00:54:31,480 Speaker 4: he couldn't get just get it through his head. All 1113 00:54:31,520 --> 00:54:33,799 Speaker 4: he had was that one vision, that one thing. That's 1114 00:54:33,840 --> 00:54:36,440 Speaker 4: all he wanted to do and know his way or. 1115 00:54:36,440 --> 00:54:39,680 Speaker 1: The high ways and look a couple of a couple 1116 00:54:39,719 --> 00:54:42,959 Speaker 1: of things. And this is what makes me very sad 1117 00:54:42,960 --> 00:54:46,080 Speaker 1: about what happened, because you guys, and obviously that played 1118 00:54:46,080 --> 00:54:50,440 Speaker 1: off with Hannah and everything you were so giving of 1119 00:54:51,200 --> 00:54:54,040 Speaker 1: that's the right thing, like, yeah, we're not trying to 1120 00:54:54,080 --> 00:54:56,200 Speaker 1: take it like you would be well within your right 1121 00:54:56,280 --> 00:54:58,000 Speaker 1: say stuff that we're going to get a called order 1122 00:54:58,040 --> 00:55:00,040 Speaker 1: that you never see your kids. But you were in 1123 00:55:00,520 --> 00:55:04,719 Speaker 1: spirit and you understood the importance of to him, you're 1124 00:55:04,800 --> 00:55:05,759 Speaker 1: being kind to him. 1125 00:55:05,800 --> 00:55:08,800 Speaker 4: We wanted to do the right find the right steps. Yeah, 1126 00:55:08,920 --> 00:55:10,640 Speaker 4: like we wanted to be all legal and just do it, 1127 00:55:10,760 --> 00:55:12,960 Speaker 4: do it proper, you know, and just move on. 1128 00:55:13,400 --> 00:55:16,440 Speaker 3: But by the time he killed them, we were starting 1129 00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:19,439 Speaker 3: to get well, maybe he should never have the children. Yeah, 1130 00:55:19,480 --> 00:55:21,719 Speaker 3: you know, we were starting to get he. 1131 00:55:21,760 --> 00:55:24,360 Speaker 1: Had those times where he took one of the kids 1132 00:55:24,400 --> 00:55:27,080 Speaker 1: away and different things, and that that caused a lot 1133 00:55:27,120 --> 00:55:29,920 Speaker 1: of stress to Hannah. So it would have to and 1134 00:55:30,080 --> 00:55:33,560 Speaker 1: I've never been in the situation. If you've had someone 1135 00:55:33,600 --> 00:55:36,480 Speaker 1: looking after my kids at that age that you didn't trust, 1136 00:55:36,560 --> 00:55:37,880 Speaker 1: it must be a living nightmare. 1137 00:55:38,000 --> 00:55:38,320 Speaker 2: Yeah. 1138 00:55:38,360 --> 00:55:41,320 Speaker 4: Well, the first time he had had the kids, remember 1139 00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:44,480 Speaker 4: that was around Australia, because it was it was just 1140 00:55:44,520 --> 00:55:47,920 Speaker 4: before Australia. So he had them for the Friday night. 1141 00:55:48,000 --> 00:55:49,480 Speaker 4: He's gonna have him Friday, So I don't think it 1142 00:55:49,520 --> 00:55:52,160 Speaker 4: was a couple of nights. So we said to Hannah, Okay, 1143 00:55:52,280 --> 00:55:54,239 Speaker 4: let's get an uber. We'll go down to the club 1144 00:55:54,320 --> 00:55:56,400 Speaker 4: down winter Man, we'll have a have a meal and 1145 00:55:56,440 --> 00:56:00,000 Speaker 4: have a few drefts. Let's just unwined ring Nikkis and Nikki. 1146 00:56:00,040 --> 00:56:02,040 Speaker 4: We're going down. How about you come down. So we 1147 00:56:02,080 --> 00:56:05,800 Speaker 4: went down and we're having a few drinks, and of course, 1148 00:56:05,840 --> 00:56:08,720 Speaker 4: next thing, she gets a phone call on his phone 1149 00:56:08,920 --> 00:56:13,560 Speaker 4: and it's Aliah. Yeah, what's going on? Oh Dad's got 1150 00:56:13,640 --> 00:56:14,960 Speaker 4: us in the car and he's taken us somewhere. 1151 00:56:15,040 --> 00:56:17,759 Speaker 2: Ye I don't know where he's driving and it's dark. 1152 00:56:17,560 --> 00:56:19,839 Speaker 4: And it's a thirty at night, and thinking well, why 1153 00:56:19,880 --> 00:56:22,000 Speaker 4: isn't he got the kids in the carner? Hang on? 1154 00:56:22,160 --> 00:56:23,960 Speaker 4: What's he doing? Is he taking them somewhere? Is he 1155 00:56:24,040 --> 00:56:26,799 Speaker 4: cutting for it? So he was starting to play those 1156 00:56:26,840 --> 00:56:29,920 Speaker 4: games right and next thing and Hannah, luckily she probably 1157 00:56:29,960 --> 00:56:32,279 Speaker 4: had a few drinks. She was quite calm about it. 1158 00:56:32,400 --> 00:56:35,480 Speaker 4: That's okay, you know, he's probably taking you to a 1159 00:56:35,480 --> 00:56:39,000 Speaker 4: fun thing, fun you know, And she didn't put any 1160 00:56:39,480 --> 00:56:43,279 Speaker 4: excitement in her voice or threatening that it's okay. And 1161 00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:46,319 Speaker 4: then before she could say the house, Aliah. This is 1162 00:56:46,320 --> 00:56:48,520 Speaker 4: how smart she was, she goes, hang on, we're just 1163 00:56:48,560 --> 00:56:51,000 Speaker 4: going past Bunnings. Oh you know, he's taking this back 1164 00:56:51,000 --> 00:56:51,480 Speaker 4: home you. 1165 00:56:51,480 --> 00:56:53,080 Speaker 2: Can see the exit on the freeway. 1166 00:56:53,320 --> 00:56:53,879 Speaker 1: Smart kid. 1167 00:56:54,480 --> 00:56:57,880 Speaker 2: Yes, he's the phone off the child. 1168 00:56:58,000 --> 00:56:59,960 Speaker 4: It just foiled the whole thing. So he was doing 1169 00:57:00,200 --> 00:57:02,759 Speaker 4: to try and upset Hannah. He obviously knew that she 1170 00:57:02,840 --> 00:57:04,360 Speaker 4: might have been out. I don't know whether he knews 1171 00:57:04,400 --> 00:57:06,719 Speaker 4: she was going out or whatever, but he just thought, 1172 00:57:06,760 --> 00:57:08,960 Speaker 4: I'll just put some fear into her that I've got 1173 00:57:08,960 --> 00:57:15,520 Speaker 4: the kids on taking off. So there's that Bravo Marsho 1174 00:57:15,640 --> 00:57:18,800 Speaker 4: man trying to be the tough guy again and beat 1175 00:57:18,840 --> 00:57:19,240 Speaker 4: her down. 1176 00:57:19,480 --> 00:57:22,680 Speaker 1: And this is where and we'll talk about this in 1177 00:57:22,720 --> 00:57:25,640 Speaker 1: part two, that you know these so called tough guys 1178 00:57:25,680 --> 00:57:28,680 Speaker 1: that think they're tough, real tough guys need to talk 1179 00:57:28,760 --> 00:57:31,680 Speaker 1: these guys down, like call them for what they are. Like, 1180 00:57:31,720 --> 00:57:34,600 Speaker 1: it's all bravarde, you are just a weak human being 1181 00:57:35,040 --> 00:57:36,680 Speaker 1: and we need to get there. 1182 00:57:39,360 --> 00:57:44,120 Speaker 3: Just the day, the day, the night before if I can, 1183 00:57:44,520 --> 00:57:47,960 Speaker 3: he FaceTime the children and he couldn't speak to them 1184 00:57:48,000 --> 00:57:52,440 Speaker 3: because he was crying so hard and like, Elia's just 1185 00:57:53,040 --> 00:57:56,080 Speaker 3: he's crying and the kids. In the end, Hannah said 1186 00:57:56,120 --> 00:57:58,920 Speaker 3: to him, I'm going to hang up unless you talk 1187 00:57:58,960 --> 00:58:00,960 Speaker 3: to the children. This is no good. They don't need 1188 00:58:01,000 --> 00:58:04,320 Speaker 3: to see you crying and then she had trouble sleeping 1189 00:58:04,360 --> 00:58:06,400 Speaker 3: that night because she thought he was going to kill himself, 1190 00:58:06,560 --> 00:58:08,880 Speaker 3: and she was really really concerned about that. 1191 00:58:10,080 --> 00:58:14,080 Speaker 1: Her empathy comes across even in that stage. But again, 1192 00:58:14,160 --> 00:58:16,640 Speaker 1: that's a manipulation, isn't. 1193 00:58:15,960 --> 00:58:17,960 Speaker 2: I'm going to go oh, he often threatened. 1194 00:58:18,520 --> 00:58:21,720 Speaker 1: I would imagine that would be part if you don't 1195 00:58:21,760 --> 00:58:23,240 Speaker 1: come back, I'm going to kill myself. That would have 1196 00:58:23,240 --> 00:58:26,200 Speaker 1: been rolled out to the point of ad nauseum. Okay, 1197 00:58:26,600 --> 00:58:30,600 Speaker 1: on the day people know about it. You've spoken about it, 1198 00:58:30,720 --> 00:58:34,480 Speaker 1: and I feel uncomfortable sitting here bringing it up. But 1199 00:58:34,840 --> 00:58:38,520 Speaker 1: I want people to understand what we're talking about here, 1200 00:58:38,560 --> 00:58:42,160 Speaker 1: and I'll say it that in a car, he doused 1201 00:58:42,160 --> 00:58:45,400 Speaker 1: Hannah and the three children with petrol, didn't douse himself 1202 00:58:45,440 --> 00:58:51,680 Speaker 1: with petrol, driving driving around, driving past someone that Hannah 1203 00:58:51,680 --> 00:58:54,360 Speaker 1: thought might be able to help and call out, and 1204 00:58:54,400 --> 00:58:58,080 Speaker 1: not on that basis that it escalated from there and 1205 00:58:58,120 --> 00:59:01,560 Speaker 1: he set the car alight. 1206 00:59:03,240 --> 00:59:05,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, she didn't know he was hiding the side of 1207 00:59:05,720 --> 00:59:08,800 Speaker 3: the house, ran out with the knife as she just 1208 00:59:08,800 --> 00:59:12,120 Speaker 3: finished putting the last one in the car seat, jumped in, 1209 00:59:12,240 --> 00:59:14,480 Speaker 3: held the knife on her and told her to drive through, 1210 00:59:14,520 --> 00:59:17,360 Speaker 3: petrol over them all and the idiot didn't realize that 1211 00:59:17,480 --> 00:59:19,840 Speaker 3: you get a bit of splashback from petrol, so he 1212 00:59:19,880 --> 00:59:22,760 Speaker 3: got petrol on himself and she just got down around 1213 00:59:22,840 --> 00:59:26,520 Speaker 3: the corner and she saw Michael, a neighbor, actually washing 1214 00:59:26,560 --> 00:59:29,480 Speaker 3: the car and he had a hose, so she screamed 1215 00:59:29,480 --> 00:59:29,880 Speaker 3: out to. 1216 00:59:29,920 --> 00:59:34,160 Speaker 4: Him, and she only had her window down. Car windows 1217 00:59:34,160 --> 00:59:37,280 Speaker 4: were tinted as well, so no one knew there were 1218 00:59:37,360 --> 00:59:41,120 Speaker 4: kids in the black One of the guys who was 1219 00:59:41,160 --> 00:59:44,640 Speaker 4: putting a sign up, he saw the cover on the 1220 00:59:44,680 --> 00:59:47,840 Speaker 4: window and it clicked to him that there's children there, 1221 00:59:47,880 --> 00:59:50,480 Speaker 4: so he raced over and sort of of course, they 1222 00:59:50,520 --> 00:59:54,160 Speaker 4: had the door locks too on it, so he only 1223 00:59:54,200 --> 00:59:57,480 Speaker 4: saw Hannah. Yeah, but Michael sort of got to the 1224 00:59:57,520 --> 01:00:01,720 Speaker 4: door and thought, what's going on in he I don't 1225 01:00:01,760 --> 01:00:04,120 Speaker 4: like to say his name, but she had had Hannah 1226 01:00:04,280 --> 01:00:06,439 Speaker 4: an a bear hug and she's trying to get out. 1227 01:00:07,360 --> 01:00:09,400 Speaker 4: Michael sort of got hose in his hand, looked and 1228 01:00:09,440 --> 01:00:12,360 Speaker 4: saw what's going on in the process, and next thing, 1229 01:00:12,480 --> 01:00:16,680 Speaker 4: all of a sudden, Hannah broke free, and he said, 1230 01:00:16,720 --> 01:00:17,960 Speaker 4: I think I got my hand to the door. I 1231 01:00:17,960 --> 01:00:19,280 Speaker 4: didn't even get over next to him. It was his 1232 01:00:19,360 --> 01:00:22,600 Speaker 4: almighty flash and that was enough. YEA he went back, 1233 01:00:22,680 --> 01:00:26,480 Speaker 4: his face got burnt. Hannah came out burnt on fire 1234 01:00:27,200 --> 01:00:30,880 Speaker 4: hose on her straight away hit get on the ground, dowst. 1235 01:00:30,920 --> 01:00:33,320 Speaker 4: Hannah kept the water on her, then looked around, saw 1236 01:00:33,400 --> 01:00:36,120 Speaker 4: him get out. He's covered in fire too, so he 1237 01:00:36,160 --> 01:00:39,880 Speaker 4: went around put him out. Then the car actually must 1238 01:00:39,880 --> 01:00:44,240 Speaker 4: have got out of gear started rolling back. Yeah, it 1239 01:00:44,240 --> 01:00:50,240 Speaker 4: had just gone up in flames. Talking to Dr Rashford 1240 01:00:51,160 --> 01:00:55,040 Speaker 4: and a few others, they reckon the velocity of the 1241 01:00:55,080 --> 01:00:57,280 Speaker 4: fire was so strong and that the kids didn't have 1242 01:00:57,280 --> 01:01:00,480 Speaker 4: a chance. They just went straight away, so there was 1243 01:01:00,560 --> 01:01:04,240 Speaker 4: no That was always my biggest thing was I hope 1244 01:01:04,240 --> 01:01:07,880 Speaker 4: the kids didn't suffer. They would have been so terrified 1245 01:01:07,920 --> 01:01:15,040 Speaker 4: because especially going on. So eight o'clock I actually got 1246 01:01:14,400 --> 01:01:19,000 Speaker 4: a phone call from Hannah. I'm on a job site, 1247 01:01:19,760 --> 01:01:21,560 Speaker 4: trying to look at a job and a lot of 1248 01:01:21,600 --> 01:01:26,040 Speaker 4: noise going around, and I'm saying, yeah, hello, how are 1249 01:01:26,040 --> 01:01:28,880 Speaker 4: you there? What's going on? Hello? And I can hear 1250 01:01:28,920 --> 01:01:31,880 Speaker 4: the kids, but it wasn't screaming, it wasn't. They just 1251 01:01:31,920 --> 01:01:34,520 Speaker 4: did me talking. So I thought, Okay, it's just a 1252 01:01:34,600 --> 01:01:37,800 Speaker 4: bum dye the kids working around. So I hung out 1253 01:01:38,720 --> 01:01:42,080 Speaker 4: and then you know, an hour later, I get a 1254 01:01:42,120 --> 01:01:45,400 Speaker 4: phone call from the neighbor saying, a detective, Sergeant Scott 1255 01:01:45,400 --> 01:01:47,200 Speaker 4: Thompson has been around here looking for you. What are 1256 01:01:47,200 --> 01:01:49,640 Speaker 4: you done? Jesus might have a speeding ticket, but I 1257 01:01:49,680 --> 01:01:50,720 Speaker 4: don't know why. Detectives. 1258 01:01:51,040 --> 01:01:54,080 Speaker 1: You don't have to confess now, Yeah. 1259 01:01:53,480 --> 01:01:56,480 Speaker 4: And holy crap, And anyway, we're trying to piece it together, 1260 01:01:56,520 --> 01:01:58,919 Speaker 4: and then he wrings him back and goes, oh, there's 1261 01:01:58,960 --> 01:02:02,360 Speaker 4: a card downs gone on fire, caught on fire, and 1262 01:02:02,360 --> 01:02:05,120 Speaker 4: you had some kids are going up in it, and 1263 01:02:05,480 --> 01:02:07,280 Speaker 4: oh wow. I still didn't put turn two together. I 1264 01:02:07,320 --> 01:02:09,360 Speaker 4: suppose I didn't want to. And he said it was 1265 01:02:09,360 --> 01:02:12,439 Speaker 4: a white car that he'd hurt. So yeah, I didn't 1266 01:02:12,440 --> 01:02:13,680 Speaker 4: think it was Hannah. I thought I she would have 1267 01:02:13,720 --> 01:02:16,479 Speaker 4: been long gone. But anyway, so I'm trying to call 1268 01:02:16,680 --> 01:02:20,760 Speaker 4: Sue Hannah at that stage, and you're going to say 1269 01:02:20,800 --> 01:02:22,640 Speaker 4: what happened to you? Years? So they came in to. 1270 01:02:22,600 --> 01:02:26,360 Speaker 3: Get you, and well, I was went for morning tea 1271 01:02:26,400 --> 01:02:29,560 Speaker 3: and I worked for dentists and one of the young 1272 01:02:29,600 --> 01:02:34,560 Speaker 3: dentists was flicking through Facebook and she stopped. She went, oh, Sue, 1273 01:02:34,960 --> 01:02:36,720 Speaker 3: three kids have been burnt to death in a car 1274 01:02:36,720 --> 01:02:39,760 Speaker 3: and camp Hill and I just knew. And then she 1275 01:02:40,000 --> 01:02:44,080 Speaker 3: read on a bit more and she went in Raven 1276 01:02:44,160 --> 01:02:46,800 Speaker 3: Street and then I just knew. And with that I 1277 01:02:46,840 --> 01:02:51,880 Speaker 3: looked up and two detectives walked in, so I knew 1278 01:02:51,880 --> 01:02:55,560 Speaker 3: straight away, and I tried as soon as she said it, 1279 01:02:55,600 --> 01:02:57,400 Speaker 3: I tried ringing and I was like, oh, no, I 1280 01:02:57,400 --> 01:02:59,040 Speaker 3: should be at the gym, the kids are at school, 1281 01:02:59,040 --> 01:03:03,400 Speaker 3: and didn't. Yeah, but it was pretty quick. And I'd 1282 01:03:03,440 --> 01:03:06,800 Speaker 3: heard the sirens all morning because I don't work far 1283 01:03:06,840 --> 01:03:09,720 Speaker 3: from where it happened. And actually I looked at the 1284 01:03:09,720 --> 01:03:12,600 Speaker 3: boss and went, Wow, something's happening today. It's all we 1285 01:03:12,600 --> 01:03:14,240 Speaker 3: could hear was sirens and sirens. 1286 01:03:15,560 --> 01:03:20,240 Speaker 1: I can't I'm sure anyone listening just can't imagine what 1287 01:03:20,840 --> 01:03:22,080 Speaker 1: goes through your mind there. 1288 01:03:22,280 --> 01:03:22,800 Speaker 4: I think. 1289 01:03:24,320 --> 01:03:28,920 Speaker 1: One thing and gained testament to Hannah my understanding of 1290 01:03:29,200 --> 01:03:32,360 Speaker 1: even though the horrific injuries that she suffered, the burns, 1291 01:03:32,680 --> 01:03:37,600 Speaker 1: and she still managed to worry about her kids that 1292 01:03:37,760 --> 01:03:42,360 Speaker 1: was her primary concern and also speak to the police. 1293 01:03:42,680 --> 01:03:43,880 Speaker 2: Yeah, she gave a statement. 1294 01:03:44,360 --> 01:03:46,160 Speaker 3: Well, in her head, she would have wanted him to pay, 1295 01:03:46,640 --> 01:03:50,160 Speaker 3: and that was her last final act to make him pay. 1296 01:03:51,600 --> 01:03:55,720 Speaker 4: People have said that witnesses who were there on the day, 1297 01:03:56,000 --> 01:03:59,320 Speaker 4: some couple of young tradees came racing up as a 1298 01:03:59,360 --> 01:04:01,840 Speaker 4: car was rolling. They went out to try and stop 1299 01:04:01,880 --> 01:04:04,000 Speaker 4: it or try and get in there. And apparently at 1300 01:04:04,000 --> 01:04:07,960 Speaker 4: that stage he was still he was I wasn't on fire, 1301 01:04:08,000 --> 01:04:10,560 Speaker 4: but he had that. He went back to the burning cart, 1302 01:04:10,760 --> 01:04:14,480 Speaker 4: pulled the knife out and looked at these people and 1303 01:04:14,520 --> 01:04:17,280 Speaker 4: threatened them with the knife, and they reckoned. His eyes 1304 01:04:17,320 --> 01:04:19,800 Speaker 4: were just black. It was something evil there. It was 1305 01:04:19,880 --> 01:04:23,400 Speaker 4: just it wasn't right. Yeah, so yeah, they sort of 1306 01:04:23,400 --> 01:04:26,200 Speaker 4: pulled back and then he stabbed himself in the in 1307 01:04:26,240 --> 01:04:30,160 Speaker 4: the chest, not once, but twice. They missed the first. 1308 01:04:30,000 --> 01:04:32,320 Speaker 2: Time and lucky it was a blunt knife too. Took 1309 01:04:32,360 --> 01:04:32,680 Speaker 2: a while. 1310 01:04:32,920 --> 01:04:39,280 Speaker 1: Yeah. No, look, you hear it. We've heard that these 1311 01:04:39,360 --> 01:04:42,320 Speaker 1: murder suicides and all that white tape, the children white 1312 01:04:42,320 --> 01:04:44,440 Speaker 1: take your partner. Yeah, if you're going to do it, do. 1313 01:04:44,440 --> 01:04:45,560 Speaker 4: It yourself exactly. 1314 01:04:45,800 --> 01:04:50,920 Speaker 1: But they're cowards. That's uh, there's no other way. 1315 01:04:50,960 --> 01:04:54,160 Speaker 3: That's why he stabbed himself. He realized then there was 1316 01:04:54,240 --> 01:04:54,760 Speaker 3: no way out. 1317 01:04:54,840 --> 01:04:58,800 Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, for being the control for it. I'd 1318 01:04:58,840 --> 01:05:01,480 Speaker 1: love love to see him put the prison situation with that, 1319 01:05:01,520 --> 01:05:03,400 Speaker 1: with what he's done and see what the tough guy 1320 01:05:03,520 --> 01:05:03,760 Speaker 1: is there. 1321 01:05:05,280 --> 01:05:10,120 Speaker 4: I think where the whole system fell apart, the QPS 1322 01:05:10,120 --> 01:05:12,439 Speaker 4: and they know it, and it was the only problem 1323 01:05:12,480 --> 01:05:15,320 Speaker 4: we've got with him is that when he did get 1324 01:05:15,800 --> 01:05:19,480 Speaker 4: when he breached the DVA and then he got caught 1325 01:05:19,520 --> 01:05:22,920 Speaker 4: at down local shopping center, they saw him, got him, 1326 01:05:23,160 --> 01:05:25,640 Speaker 4: took him to the police beat. He should have went 1327 01:05:25,760 --> 01:05:29,400 Speaker 4: to the watchhouse because he had breached his DVO and 1328 01:05:29,440 --> 01:05:31,640 Speaker 4: he had never gone back in to give his side 1329 01:05:31,680 --> 01:05:35,400 Speaker 4: of the story, give his evidence. So they let him go. 1330 01:05:35,640 --> 01:05:38,600 Speaker 4: And if he would have spent a night in jail 1331 01:05:39,080 --> 01:05:41,880 Speaker 4: bailable offense, maybe that could have been enough just to 1332 01:05:41,880 --> 01:05:44,800 Speaker 4: sort of stop it, a bit of a wake up call, 1333 01:05:44,880 --> 01:05:47,280 Speaker 4: put him in the pan for a while, cool him down, 1334 01:05:47,840 --> 01:05:50,520 Speaker 4: you know. But no, he got let off. So again, 1335 01:05:50,600 --> 01:05:54,160 Speaker 4: you know, he missed getting a smack on the wrist 1336 01:05:54,600 --> 01:05:57,760 Speaker 4: which might have set him straight. But we will never know. 1337 01:05:58,160 --> 01:06:01,720 Speaker 1: Well, when we might take a break now and when 1338 01:06:01,720 --> 01:06:05,400 Speaker 1: we get back, we're going to talk about the aftermath 1339 01:06:05,680 --> 01:06:08,840 Speaker 1: of what happened with the and it's a tragedy that 1340 01:06:08,920 --> 01:06:11,680 Speaker 1: touched everyone in the country. I don't think they're and 1341 01:06:12,000 --> 01:06:13,560 Speaker 1: I said it to you guys the other day when 1342 01:06:13,600 --> 01:06:15,160 Speaker 1: I said I was coming up here to do a 1343 01:06:15,160 --> 01:06:18,760 Speaker 1: podcast with you I've done podcasts with a lot of people, 1344 01:06:18,760 --> 01:06:21,400 Speaker 1: but the amount of comments I got with people going, oh, 1345 01:06:21,480 --> 01:06:25,040 Speaker 1: I remember that, so it's in the country, Psyche, what 1346 01:06:25,040 --> 01:06:29,720 Speaker 1: what happened? But we'll talk about, yeah, if any good 1347 01:06:29,800 --> 01:06:32,720 Speaker 1: can come from this, making sure that this type of 1348 01:06:32,760 --> 01:06:36,280 Speaker 1: thing is harder for it to happen again, and different 1349 01:06:36,280 --> 01:06:38,200 Speaker 1: things on the back of the work that you guys 1350 01:06:38,240 --> 01:06:41,680 Speaker 1: are tirelessly doing. So let's have a break and when 1351 01:06:41,720 --> 01:06:43,040 Speaker 1: we'll get back, we'll talk about that. 1352 01:06:43,880 --> 01:06:45,080 Speaker 4: Okay, sound good, Good