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Speaker 1: Ization or explanation of why I'm not prepared to move ahead.

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Speaker 1: So the question would be, well, what makes you think

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Speaker 1: that anything I have.

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Speaker 2: To say.

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Speaker 1: Would be more useful than the conclusions you would arrive

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Speaker 1: at on your own, knowing yourself better than anyone else

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Speaker 1: could possibly know you.

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Speaker 3: I think someone would look at you and go, what

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Speaker 3: the fuck are you talking about?

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Speaker 2: I just asked what I should do?

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Speaker 3: You know what I mean? Like to me, just I

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Speaker 3: just asked, mate, Yeah, that seems unnecessarily high level, complicated. Yes,

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Speaker 3: I'm like to me, it does. It's like, bro, I

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Speaker 3: want to know what fuck? Uh? You know, like my

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Speaker 3: shoulder hurts when I do this movement for chest? Have

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Speaker 3: you got any other ideas? You've trained your whole life.

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Speaker 3: You're a qualified trainer, you know, you've worked in gyms.

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Speaker 3: You know, like, surely then you could go, well, what

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Speaker 3: don't you try instead of overhand grip, try a neutral

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Speaker 3: grip with dumbbells instead of a straight bar, or something

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Speaker 3: where it's like, oh, that's a specific answer to a

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Speaker 3: specific question.

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Speaker 2: You're talking about.

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Speaker 1: Say, when I think about advice, I'm thinking about I'm

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Speaker 1: in this situation. What would you do and guide me

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Speaker 1: and I will take action based on what you would

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Speaker 1: do in my situation someone in the gym. That's kind

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Speaker 1: of like technical observation, analysis, application, assessment of how that worked,

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Speaker 1: and modification of what do we do next?

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Speaker 3: No, because I feel like I need some help. Give

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Speaker 3: me some I need help. I got a question. Give

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Speaker 3: me some advice. Try this. That's advice.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so okay, So let's let's break this down. Are

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Speaker 1: you giving technical information and disseminating knowledge or expertise, or

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Speaker 1: you're saying, Okay, here's my life experience.

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Speaker 2: I've been in your situation, with.

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Speaker 1: This relationship, with this life transition, this career progression, here's

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Speaker 1: what I would do. And I've asked that question a

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Speaker 1: few times. Why is my insight greater than the conclusions

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Speaker 1: that you would come to on your own. And it's

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Speaker 1: a big question, but I don't think it's an unnecessary one.

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Speaker 2: I think it's a powerful one.

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Speaker 3: On confident, I reckon it's powerful. But it's perhaps situation dependent,

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Speaker 3: like many many, many things. Do you think that sometimes

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Speaker 3: when people I'm not agreeing or disagreeing, by the way,

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Speaker 3: I'm just fleshing it out, which I think is this

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Speaker 3: is my point. I've been thinking about advice and how

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Speaker 3: and when I know that sometimes no advice is the

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Speaker 3: best advice. And I'll talk about an example in a minute.

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Speaker 3: I feel like sometimes when people say, hey, I want

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Speaker 3: some advice around this, what they actually want is reinforcement,

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Speaker 3: you know, more support for their current idea. They really

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Speaker 3: want you to go, yeah.

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Speaker 2: This is what I'm planning on doing.

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Speaker 1: Tell me why I'm correct in my thinking, and that

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Speaker 1: eyes this advice, and that is not a request for advice.

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Speaker 1: So that's nonetheless my reluctance comes from.

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Speaker 3: But it's framed as a question for advice.

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Speaker 2: Right, so you can answer it.

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Speaker 1: You could give a simple answer like I would do this,

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Speaker 1: so Craig, now that I've told you what to do,

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Speaker 1: what's going to be different about your situation moving forward?

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Speaker 1: What's changed from now versus sixty seconds ago. That's kind

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Speaker 1: of a good question too. None of these questions are easy,

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Speaker 1: and they might be irritating because they are quite confronting.

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Speaker 1: But if you're coming to me for advice or something

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Speaker 1: you're wanting, and I'm not sure that what you're wanting

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Speaker 1: is my opinion, what.

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Speaker 3: About yeah, or it's U Scott right, what about Okay,

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Speaker 3: I'm coming to you for advice, And then can you

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Speaker 3: say to me, perhaps, do you really want my advice

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Speaker 3: or do you want me to endorse or reinforce or

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Speaker 3: support what you already plan to do? Be honest, because

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Speaker 3: what I have to tell you might not be what

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Speaker 3: you want to hear. Like if all you want is

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Speaker 3: a fan club or a support team, that's not me

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Speaker 3: giving you advice, or that's not me giving that's not

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Speaker 3: me coaching you. Well, if I'm just your support crew

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Speaker 3: and cheersquad, and no matter what you're going to do,

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Speaker 3: I just go well done, well, I'm no value to you,

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Speaker 3: you know. And I feel like sometimes when people ask

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Speaker 3: me for advice, I give them advice or I give

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Speaker 3: them information or support or guidance that they actually don't want.

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Speaker 3: And it's I see this fucking look of disappointment. And

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Speaker 3: I've said to audience as many times, I can tell

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Speaker 3: you what you want to hear, or I can tell

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Speaker 3: you what I believe based on lots of encounters and

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Speaker 3: conversations and experiences and research and knowledge, and I can

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Speaker 3: tell you what I believe to be a better path, right,

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Speaker 3: which is not I'm telling you what to do. But

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Speaker 3: then because I think that we think we're really open

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Speaker 3: minded about feedback. It's like we like feedback until we

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Speaker 3: get the feedback or advice that we don't like.

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Speaker 2: Well, I think that's a great question. What are you

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Speaker 2: really wanting in this situation?

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Speaker 1: And if it's like, well, I just truly don't know

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Speaker 1: what to do right, like with the old bad Press,

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Speaker 1: I'm not a biomechanist, right you are, so help me?

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Speaker 2: Great?

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Speaker 1: That is an appropriate situation to put your expert hat

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Speaker 1: on and disseminate insights versus well, I really think this

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Speaker 1: is the right thing to do, and I want to

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Speaker 1: know what you think, meaning I want to know if

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Speaker 1: you think that I'm right in thinking this is the

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Speaker 1: right thing to do. So, I feel like advice can

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Speaker 1: be useful, but you got to be careful because of

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Speaker 1: overstep autonomy. It's you're probably not helping as much as

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Speaker 1: you think you might be. Like that guy in that conversation,

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Speaker 1: if he's giving advice and it's obvious to you that

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Speaker 1: someone that he has a relationship with is completely disinterested.

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Speaker 1: What I wonder is, who's that conversation about? Is it

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Speaker 1: about the advice receiver or the advice giver in that

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Speaker 1: moment and it sounds to me like it's more about

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Speaker 1: the giver of advice rather than the recipient, because otherwise

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Speaker 1: you might want to be more tuned in to how

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Speaker 1: that's landing or not landing.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, that's perfect I think also, like for me,

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Speaker 3: one of my fuck ups around advice has been giving

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Speaker 3: advice to people. My biggest fuck up in this space, honestly,

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Speaker 3: being brutally honest with me self reflecting is with my

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Speaker 3: mom and dad. And I started, I recognized started it

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Speaker 3: twenty giving my mum advice about her smoking habit, right,

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Speaker 3: advice that she didn't fucking want, conversations that she didn't want, right, Mary,

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Speaker 3: the fucking chain smoker, and that didn't work out. Well,

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Speaker 3: she's got one lung now. But anyway, I don't want

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Speaker 3: to say I told you so, Mum, but fuck mum,

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Speaker 3: you know. And then all I did when I would

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Speaker 3: give Mom some I would give her feedback, or I

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Speaker 3: would give her advice, or I would give her whatever

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Speaker 3: that she didn't want. But my excuse was, but I

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Speaker 3: love you, I want you to live a long, healthy life.

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Speaker 3: My reasons are good. Therefore, fucking sit down and listen, right,

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Speaker 3: And all I did was create more of a problem personally, interpersonally, sociologically,

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Speaker 3: you know, communication I created more of a problem than

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Speaker 3: any solution, despite the fact that the knowledge was good,

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Speaker 3: the science was good, the intentions were good. Yeah, So

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Speaker 3: that I see that a lot in families where people

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Speaker 3: are like, I'm just trying to help. That's great, but

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Speaker 3: you're not helping, Like, I know what you're intending to do,

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Speaker 3: well done, that's nice. Guess what, it's not fucking working.

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Speaker 3: It's ineffective. So hit the brakes and just find a

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Speaker 3: bit of space and self awareness and say, is the

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Speaker 3: thing that you're constantly trying to shove down that person's

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Speaker 3: face isn't helping. It might be right, you might be right.

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Speaker 3: You might be this might be your version of love.

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Speaker 3: But guess what it isn't for them.

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Speaker 1: So that's an equally important question, not just with the asker,

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Speaker 1: what are you truly wanting? What's your intention?

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Speaker 2: In the question?

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Speaker 1: To the advice giver, what is your intention in giving advice?

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Speaker 1: You're got to know what your motivation is because sometimes

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Speaker 1: we want change for people more than they want it

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Speaker 1: for themselves, are more than they're ready to face. What

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Speaker 1: the cons difrinstance of change? My or maybe it's okay,

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Speaker 1: Maybe they are in pre contemplation, which means I won't change.

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Speaker 2: I don't think I have a problem.

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Speaker 1: You have a problem, or I believe everything you're saying

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Speaker 1: is true, but for a million reasons connected to my habit,

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Speaker 1: my behavior problem. It's not that I won't change. I

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Speaker 1: believe I cannot. And the more you push, the more

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Speaker 1: you keep them stuck in that phase. You are not helping.

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Speaker 1: When you are doing that, people do not change because

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Speaker 1: of your sheer force of will and desire for them

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Speaker 1: to be something or do something different than what they're

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Speaker 1: doing or who they're being in the moment. And that

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Speaker 1: is something that I think really gets in the way

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Speaker 1: of communication dynamics in every facet of our lives and work.

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Speaker 3: There's someone right now listening to there's someone right now

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Speaker 3: listening to this, thinking, yeah, that's great, But my son's

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Speaker 3: an addict, Well, my daughter's an addict, and I'm watching

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Speaker 3: them fucking kill themselves and I'm distraught, They're distraught, the

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Speaker 3: family's broken. What should I do? Just sit back as

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Speaker 3: a passenger?

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Speaker 1: Oh fuck now, no, fucking hold on, we're talking about now,

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Speaker 1: we're crossing into It is.

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Speaker 2: Like imminent danger.

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Speaker 1: It is urgent and emergent is what we're referring to

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Speaker 1: at this moment.

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Speaker 3: I like that urgent and emergent.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, good toddler's If your toddler is crossing a busy street,

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Speaker 1: it's like, wow, I don't want to rob them of

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Speaker 1: their autonomy. Get out of the street or run into

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Speaker 1: the street and grab that fucking kid and pull them

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Speaker 1: onto the pavement. Talk about it, like, talk about it later,

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Speaker 1: but get them out of the street. So, if you're

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Speaker 1: dealing with someone who is doing serious damage to themselves

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Speaker 1: and the consequences are not going to happen ten years

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Speaker 1: down the road as a result of whatever that bad

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Speaker 1: habit is, whether it's cigarettes or alcohol, or whether it's Canoli's.

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Speaker 1: I don't know why I say Canolis. But how good

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Speaker 1: Canoli though?

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Speaker 2: Now? And all these are amazing?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, come on now, I want to fucking Cannoli. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: they should get a Nobel Prize for food.

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Speaker 2: No, it's sinister.

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Speaker 1: It's fuck it's a sinister How do you creat something

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Speaker 1: that's so good but so bad? Anyway, So, if you're

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Speaker 1: dealing with someone and the extreme consequences are imminent, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think now's not the time to respect their autonomy

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Speaker 1: and to reflect.

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Speaker 2: And to go through exploration.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I have a very strong kind of rule about

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Speaker 3: not giving advice to anyone around exercise who hasn't asked

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Speaker 3: me for it. However, there's been a couple of times

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Speaker 3: I've told this a couple of times, maybe so those

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Speaker 3: who've heard it, I apologize. But twenty one hundred episodes,

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Speaker 3: give me a break. I was in a gym in Sydney.

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Speaker 3: I was doing a gig and I went into the

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Speaker 3: or they had a relationship with a chain of gym's feud.

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Speaker 3: Doors up from the hotel, walked up to the gym.

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Speaker 3: I was doing a workout. There was a lady doing

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Speaker 3: something in there that it wasn't whether or not she

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Speaker 3: was going to hurt herself, it was just when, like

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Speaker 3: with the thing that she was doing the way that

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Speaker 3: she was doing it, she was definitely going to hurt herself,

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Speaker 3: like a zero doubt in my mind. And I'm thinking

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Speaker 3: she didn't know me. I don't know her. I could

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Speaker 3: be some fucking widow, which I probably am. But like

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Speaker 3: you can't go, hey, guess what, I'm this and I

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Speaker 3: know that, and you can't do that because you also

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Speaker 3: look like a dickhead. I never would anyway, but anyway,

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Speaker 3: I just went up. I said, I go, this is

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Speaker 3: going to sound weird, but could I just give you

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Speaker 3: a little bit of advice? And she goes no, and

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Speaker 3: I go, Roger that, and I walked away and I

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Speaker 3: just went, yeah, why do I do that? It's like,

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Speaker 3: but you know, when you see someone like she wasn't

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Speaker 3: going to get run over like the kid on the

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Speaker 3: road analogy, but for sure she was going to injure herself.

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Speaker 3: And I knew how she could avoid that. But you know,

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Speaker 3: one stranger come up to another stranger in the gym.

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Speaker 3: She's probably been training for five years, I don't know. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: so it's I find that juxtaposition that fucking oh well,

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Speaker 3: because I don't want to stand by and watch people

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Speaker 3: hurt themselves or let them hurt themselves. But I think sometimes,

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Speaker 3: you know, okay, so she fucks up her shoulder, all right, Well,

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Speaker 3: is it my job to intervene? Probably not. But that's

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Speaker 3: just one of those almost those ethical or moral or

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Speaker 3: fucking empathetic kind of conundrums that I get myself in.

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Speaker 2: And we would teach that in the gym. Chance, so.

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Speaker 1: One of the most widely requested all day trainings that

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Speaker 1: we ever did or I ever did. This has gone

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Speaker 1: back to my ANSM dees was can you come into

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Speaker 1: the gym and teach trainers how to build a business

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Speaker 1: a clientele off the floor and we would teach step

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Speaker 1: by step how to gain trust, build rapport, not violate autonomy,

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Speaker 1: how to ask questions and that question is not necessarily

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Speaker 1: Hey can I give you some advice? Do you might

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Speaker 1: if I make a suggestion or this was a brilliant

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Speaker 1: one that I always got caught up with when I

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Speaker 1: was a trainer.

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Speaker 2: Is there anything I could do to help you?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm kind of could you get me a water

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Speaker 1: at the ft?

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Speaker 2: Oh? Sure, yeah, I'll take care of that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Really what I was getting at off? Yeah or fuck off? Yeah? So,

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Speaker 2: and we structured a layered.

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Speaker 1: Process to get to the point where you draw requests

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Speaker 1: from the person rather than giving them advice in the moment. Yes,

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Speaker 1: so we would do things like that. But when one

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Speaker 1: of the caveats was if you see someone and this

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Speaker 1: goes back to urgent and emergent, who is doing something

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Speaker 1: where you're pretty sure that you have a good idea

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Speaker 1: they're going to dislocate both their shoulders, rip both their

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Speaker 1: arms off, and be spinning around as these two armless

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Speaker 1: stumps are spring blood all over the walls in circular patterns?

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Speaker 3: Could you be less traumatic?

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Speaker 2: Going? Now?

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Speaker 1: That happened to A guy wants now anyway, Well, I

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Speaker 1: did see something. I mean, god, you've seen some horrible

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Speaker 1: shit in the gym.

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Speaker 3: I've seen some horm I've also had my training partner

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Speaker 3: to die in front of me, So it doesn't get

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Speaker 3: much worse than that.

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Speaker 1: That is that that is pretty serious. I've seen double

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Speaker 1: shoulder dislocations and someone screw eaming. If you think that's

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Speaker 1: about to happen, like fuck it, approach that person and

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Speaker 1: be pretty and be pretty assertive about it. But if

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Speaker 1: you don't think it's going to happen, then and it's

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Speaker 1: something that might be a problem a few months down

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Speaker 1: the line. Put a few steps in between, I don't

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Speaker 1: know who you are and I don't care and oh

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Speaker 1: here's my best thinking, because that usually doesn't go over well.

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Speaker 1: So you really have to think, am I being right?

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Speaker 1: Or am I being effective?

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Speaker 3: Is?

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Speaker 1: Like it's kind of like you said, with the gym,

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Speaker 1: It's not like somebody is like John is out of shape,

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Speaker 1: and I don't say something to make John join the

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Speaker 1: gym on Thursday, He's probably going to be dead by Tuesday.

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Speaker 1: And that's on me. That's probably not the situation you're

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Speaker 1: dealing with.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, probably probably what about I think almost in a

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Speaker 3: kind of starting with a bit of a theory of

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Speaker 3: mind kind of vibe of understanding the person. You know,

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Speaker 3: when you have little or no insight into you know,

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Speaker 3: you see you see the tip of the iceberg with

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Speaker 3: the problem, but you don't see the iceberg, right, So

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Speaker 3: you don't have any insight into the totality of their

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Speaker 3: story or issue or background or mindset or physiology or

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Speaker 3: worldview or personality or their own personal reality. So you're

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Speaker 3: seeing point zero one percent of the issue thinking that's

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Speaker 3: all the issue, and then you're launching from there like

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Speaker 3: you're like, hey, I know, wow, this is you know,

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Speaker 3: And then again, as to earlier, it might be perfect

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Speaker 3: for me, it might be catastrophic for them because you

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Speaker 3: actually you don't know the story, you don't know the problem,

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Speaker 3: you don't know the totality of it nearly, but you

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Speaker 3: operate on the assumption that you think you get it,

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Speaker 3: and so you're you're going to be valuable to them.

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Speaker 1: I'm thinking about this comprehensive book right here on my

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Speaker 1: bookshelf that the gargoyle is sitting on.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the orange book. What is that orange book called?

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Speaker 2: It is Behaved by Robert Soopolski.

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Speaker 1: And you might be looking at someone who you care about,

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Speaker 1: and when week, it's hard to disassociate from someone we

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Speaker 1: care about, we want the best for, and we definitely

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Speaker 1: don't want pain and suffering for.

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Speaker 2: So this is a hard situation.

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Speaker 1: And I'm assuming that most people who give unsolicited advice

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Speaker 1: are coming from a caring place. I mean, you know,

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Speaker 1: I used to be in the health and fitness industry.

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Speaker 1: We know a lot of these people who seemed very

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Speaker 1: intense from the stage I'm thinking about someone right now,

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Speaker 1: But when you talk to them, they feel because they

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Speaker 1: know so much, they're able to see more, They have

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Speaker 1: more distinctions, and it's urgent for them because they see

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Speaker 1: dangers in front of people in ways that that individual

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Speaker 1: and people around them might not even see. So I get,

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Speaker 1: but you see somebody doing something two minutes ago that

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Speaker 1: you don't agree with, or on a Saturday night you

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Speaker 1: don't think they should be doing, or there's something they're

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Speaker 1: not doing that you think they should be doing. But

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Speaker 1: what you don't see is what led up to that.

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Speaker 1: What happened three milliseconds in their brain before they engaged

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Speaker 1: in that. Now, what happened three minutes before in their brain?

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Speaker 1: What happened three weeks, three months, three years, three decades

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Speaker 1: in their brain living every moment, every minute of their

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Speaker 1: life as them with a myriad incalculable influences and reference

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Speaker 1: points shaping that person up to that point when they

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Speaker 1: did that. Bless you, and you understand that's because Craig

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Speaker 1: just Niez.

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Speaker 3: For those of you who are just I turned off

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Speaker 3: my audio, thank you.

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Speaker 1: So, and understand that you have the same dynamic complexity

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Speaker 1: in your brain, but it's led you to very different places.

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Speaker 2: I think that is.

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Speaker 1: A very important thing to understand about how complex human

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Speaker 1: behavior is. And sometimes you can't put in what you

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Speaker 1: think was laughed out, but you could draw out what

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Speaker 1: is inside.

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Speaker 2: And yeah, you know.

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Speaker 3: But I think that whether or not they've asked for it,

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Speaker 3: I'm just writing notes, which is terrible on air, but

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Speaker 3: I just thought of a title for the show. I

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Speaker 3: just think that that is a high risk activity, whether

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Speaker 3: or not you know them or not. You know, even

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Speaker 3: when people have come to you so it is solicited

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Speaker 3: a device, there's that still. I you know, if somebody

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Speaker 3: comes to me just for a chat, you know they

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Speaker 3: want to be coached, and obviously they want some kind

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Speaker 3: of what we might call advice or direction or input

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Speaker 3: or feedback or whatever guidance. I kind of will generally

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Speaker 3: talk at the most maybe twenty percent of the time,

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Speaker 3: because I just I want to understand them. I want

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Speaker 3: to understand, like, what is going on with you physically, emotionally,

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Speaker 3: mentally as best I can in that very limited timeframe,

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Speaker 3: so that I'm speaking from an informed place, informed in

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Speaker 3: regards to who you are, how you are, why you

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Speaker 3: are the way you are, because I don't want to be.

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Speaker 3: You know, that guy that's talking to what he thinks

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Speaker 3: is just another version of him. And I think also

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Speaker 3: what is interesting, I was just thinking a moment as

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Speaker 3: you were talking moment ago, people who have a bit

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Speaker 3: of a personal revelation and kind of catharsis and reinvention,

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Speaker 3: then all of a sudden, they're fucking evangelists that nobody

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Speaker 3: wants to hear. It's like, mate, you know what you

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Speaker 3: need to do?

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Speaker 4: I'm doing this and this has done that and it's

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Speaker 4: changed my life, and so you need to do that

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Speaker 4: because it all.

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Speaker 3: Like, bro settle the fuck down. One of your energy

384
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Speaker 3: is obnoxious. May be good intentions, well done, but read

385
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Speaker 3: the room, Champ like read the room. And in doing

386
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Speaker 3: that sometimes I've got many friends who are zealots about

387
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Speaker 3: our thing, our thing, and I won't mention the things

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Speaker 3: because I'll get someone's nose out of joint. I'm like, cool,

389
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Speaker 3: that may or may not be true. I know it

390
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:15,520
Speaker 3: seems to be very true to you and for you,

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Speaker 3: and you could be right and I could be wrong,

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Speaker 3: but right now, just could you not assault me with

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Speaker 3: all this? Could you just also didn't ask? You know,

394
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Speaker 3: but you need to know though, No, no, you are

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Speaker 3: creating this not connection.

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Speaker 2: Are you talking about when I got a cat?

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Speaker 3: That's fucking hell, you're onto me. That's exactly what I'm talking.

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Speaker 2: About, you know, just that.

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Speaker 3: I mean people understandably, people get excited and you know,

400
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Speaker 3: you know, evangelical, and I will I'm going to really

401
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Speaker 3: throw myself under the bus now when I when I

402
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Speaker 3: got churchy when I was younger, because I grew up

403
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Speaker 3: in church. But it's kind of like being a Catholic

404
00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:01,199
Speaker 3: is just kind of going to a room once a

405
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Speaker 3: week with a bunch of other board people listening to

406
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Speaker 3: you know, well, that was my experience. A bunch of

407
00:23:05,920 --> 00:23:08,359
Speaker 3: board people listening to a boring bike. Right, then, that

408
00:23:08,520 --> 00:23:12,160
Speaker 3: was it, right say stuff that he said essentially last

409
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Speaker 3: week and the week before. But then when I went

410
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Speaker 3: down this other path, I'm like, oh my god, I've

411
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Speaker 3: discovered the thing that everyone needs.

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Speaker 4: Everyone needs to know. Doesn't matter, it doesn't matter what

413
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Speaker 4: they want. They're going to know this thing that I know.

414
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Speaker 4: And I'm like, oh, I look back, and I go

415
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Speaker 4: I was such a dumbass. I was so unaware.

416
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Speaker 3: I was fucking cute and innocent and had great intentions.

417
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Speaker 3: But I must have fucked up. So I fucked up

418
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Speaker 3: way more than I got right, you know. But I

419
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Speaker 3: truly believed that I was doing the right thing. But

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Speaker 3: I totally wasn't.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, like when I was in eighth grade, I was

422
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Speaker 1: fourteen and I got involved with Nietron Daishon and Sokia

423
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Speaker 1: got gay Buddhism in South Brooklyn.

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Speaker 3: Dude, that seems like a weird place to get into

425
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Speaker 3: all of that BuddhismA. I can't remember any of that ship.

426
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Speaker 3: You said, let's just go with Buddhism. Is that a

427
00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:06,040
Speaker 3: different kind of Buddhism too.

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Speaker 1: Well, there's so many sacks of Buddhism. That was the

429
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Speaker 1: Buddhism I was in, and there was a very specific

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Speaker 1: chant and there was there were very specific things that

431
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Speaker 1: I would do, like take a very specific path home

432
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Speaker 1: or else I would get beat up severely because did

433
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Speaker 1: you say class home or we said num numb your

434
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Speaker 1: hold on gay kio?

435
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Speaker 3: Wow?

436
00:24:29,720 --> 00:24:32,439
Speaker 2: Wow? Do you want to know what that whole thing means?

437
00:24:32,640 --> 00:24:35,040
Speaker 3: Like I want to know what that means?

438
00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:39,320
Speaker 1: Okay, Well that was just a joke, but it talked

439
00:24:39,320 --> 00:24:46,760
Speaker 1: about devotion to the mystical manifestation of the universe represented

440
00:24:46,880 --> 00:24:50,239
Speaker 1: in the in the Renge flower. Rene was was the

441
00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:54,280
Speaker 1: Lotus Sutra flower and Kio is the rhythm, the the

442
00:24:54,920 --> 00:25:01,600
Speaker 1: energetic resonance that the universe universe vibrates on, and that

443
00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:05,199
Speaker 1: they used the load of Sutra flower because it is

444
00:25:05,240 --> 00:25:10,119
Speaker 1: this beautiful, flourishing flower that grows in an environment where

445
00:25:10,160 --> 00:25:14,440
Speaker 1: no life should be possible. It's it's the audience possibility

446
00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:15,760
Speaker 1: and miraculous.

447
00:25:15,920 --> 00:25:17,879
Speaker 3: The audience from mimmy not to say I want to

448
00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:23,200
Speaker 3: hear next time frommy.

449
00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:23,080
Speaker 1: So, what I'm trying to say was I got the

450
00:25:23,119 --> 00:25:25,600
Speaker 1: living shit kicked out of me a lot that year.

451
00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:30,040
Speaker 3: Ah, they didn't. They weren't picking up what you were

452
00:25:30,040 --> 00:25:32,439
Speaker 3: putting down. Bro. No.

453
00:25:32,560 --> 00:25:36,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, So talking to a bunch of kids in Brooklyn

454
00:25:36,640 --> 00:25:42,120
Speaker 1: about load of sutra flowers and like, yeah, just I'm

455
00:25:42,160 --> 00:25:44,440
Speaker 1: shocked from your physical wellbeing.

456
00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:47,920
Speaker 3: Wow, maybe you should have just border mate and ice cream.

457
00:25:47,960 --> 00:25:49,600
Speaker 3: They would have loved you and accepted.

458
00:25:49,280 --> 00:25:51,800
Speaker 2: You in hindsight.

459
00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:58,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, what about This is more practical and almost lands

460
00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:05,760
Speaker 3: in the psychology. But what's the term I guess situational awareness,

461
00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:09,080
Speaker 3: like in the moment understanding, you know, being able to

462
00:26:09,520 --> 00:26:12,760
Speaker 3: colloquially read the room or read the person in the

463
00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:20,360
Speaker 3: room and just understand. Because sometimes, like for example, when

464
00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:23,399
Speaker 3: I would have one of my trainers, and you know

465
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:25,320
Speaker 3: I have lots and lots of trainers, and I would

466
00:26:25,320 --> 00:26:29,080
Speaker 3: see them doing something on the gym floor that wasn't okay.

467
00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:31,480
Speaker 3: If it was diabolical, I would have gone and stopped it.

468
00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:34,720
Speaker 3: But just something that's not what I want to happen

469
00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:37,640
Speaker 3: or not the way I want it to happen exactly,

470
00:26:38,400 --> 00:26:40,200
Speaker 3: So I would never go up to them and say hey,

471
00:26:40,200 --> 00:26:41,800
Speaker 3: what are you doing? But I would never do that.

472
00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:45,399
Speaker 3: I would just say, hey, when you get a moment,

473
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:47,800
Speaker 3: come see me, no dramas, just want to chat to

474
00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:50,240
Speaker 3: you about something, right, And then they would still come

475
00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:53,800
Speaker 3: into my office terrified. But when it's just me and

476
00:26:53,840 --> 00:26:55,520
Speaker 3: them in a room and no one else can hear

477
00:26:56,440 --> 00:26:59,600
Speaker 3: the feedback, we'll call it feedback or the direction or

478
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:02,760
Speaker 3: the coach, remembering they were all junior to me and

479
00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:07,399
Speaker 3: I was their boss, and it would be received somewhere

480
00:27:07,480 --> 00:27:12,360
Speaker 3: between usually okay and really well, not always but mostly.

481
00:27:12,960 --> 00:27:15,760
Speaker 3: But had I done that in a different context, like

482
00:27:15,840 --> 00:27:18,399
Speaker 3: in front of their peers or their clients, which would

483
00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:23,160
Speaker 3: be stupid, the exact same information with the exact intention

484
00:27:23,240 --> 00:27:28,800
Speaker 3: would create a fucking diabolical outcome most times, you know,

485
00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:32,119
Speaker 3: ranging from resentment to wanting to fucking punch me in

486
00:27:32,119 --> 00:27:35,080
Speaker 3: the face in the car park. Right, So, just that

487
00:27:35,359 --> 00:27:37,840
Speaker 3: understanding of the when and the how and the why

488
00:27:37,920 --> 00:27:40,560
Speaker 3: and the context and is this a good place and

489
00:27:40,640 --> 00:27:45,400
Speaker 3: time to share this? I think it's somewhat situation dependent too,

490
00:27:45,880 --> 00:27:46,480
Speaker 3: or it can be.

491
00:27:47,080 --> 00:27:49,800
Speaker 1: Oh god, you have to be emotionally intelligent and if

492
00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:54,360
Speaker 1: you're not, you're not going to be effective. Not just

493
00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:57,119
Speaker 1: in that instance, but in many instances that you're going

494
00:27:57,160 --> 00:27:59,760
Speaker 1: to engage, and you have to understand.

495
00:27:59,440 --> 00:28:02,040
Speaker 2: What that environment is like, and not what it's like

496
00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:02,960
Speaker 2: for you.

497
00:28:02,800 --> 00:28:06,800
Speaker 1: Being the sage giving the advice, but the person receiving it,

498
00:28:06,840 --> 00:28:10,040
Speaker 1: and the environment and the timing and the context in

499
00:28:10,080 --> 00:28:12,520
Speaker 1: which they receive it and the delivery.

500
00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:15,640
Speaker 2: It all mattered. Today I was writing a.

501
00:28:17,119 --> 00:28:20,639
Speaker 1: I was writing an employee review which they requested, and

502
00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:23,320
Speaker 1: it was a good one. I went over it a

503
00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:25,560
Speaker 1: couple of times and I was like, Okay, even when

504
00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:31,560
Speaker 1: I'm making recommendations, which is part of mede, Okay, moving forward,

505
00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:36,280
Speaker 1: Here's what I'd like to see or what might be useful.

506
00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:38,680
Speaker 2: How is this being framed?

507
00:28:38,760 --> 00:28:42,360
Speaker 1: Is this being framed as a critique or something I

508
00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:45,360
Speaker 1: am telling you I think you should do, or something

509
00:28:45,440 --> 00:28:48,600
Speaker 1: that you might want to explore because of the way.

510
00:28:48,400 --> 00:28:51,560
Speaker 2: It will impact you in the near and long term.

511
00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:56,440
Speaker 2: So you and I sorry going back. So that's all

512
00:28:56,480 --> 00:28:57,000
Speaker 2: I want to say.

513
00:28:57,000 --> 00:29:00,760
Speaker 1: There's another valuable human being at the other end of

514
00:29:00,800 --> 00:29:03,360
Speaker 1: what it is that they're reading or what you're saying.

515
00:29:04,360 --> 00:29:06,480
Speaker 3: Is what you and I are doing right now giving

516
00:29:06,520 --> 00:29:09,280
Speaker 3: advice on full paople on how not to give advice.

517
00:29:10,800 --> 00:29:12,120
Speaker 2: I think it's really different, though.

518
00:29:12,400 --> 00:29:17,520
Speaker 1: What we're doing is sharing insights and exploring ideas around

519
00:29:17,560 --> 00:29:22,000
Speaker 1: the value of those insights, and not just the value

520
00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:26,200
Speaker 1: of them, but what's the framework, what are the things

521
00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:29,560
Speaker 1: that you need to consider? And when people listen to this,

522
00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:33,440
Speaker 1: some of what we're saying might resonate and they might say, oh, okay,

523
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:37,920
Speaker 1: I can use this, or I understand more clearly now

524
00:29:38,520 --> 00:29:41,000
Speaker 1: why I asked someone for advice. They gave it to me,

525
00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:43,840
Speaker 1: I got upset and and follow it, or maybe I

526
00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:46,320
Speaker 1: was at the other end of that is the advice giver,

527
00:29:47,040 --> 00:29:49,200
Speaker 1: and I had a couple of assumptions that might have

528
00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:52,160
Speaker 1: gotten the way, But I don't think to go back

529
00:29:52,240 --> 00:29:54,280
Speaker 1: to what we were saying earlier, You and I have

530
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:59,680
Speaker 1: no expectation that anybody listening to this needs to do

531
00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:04,080
Speaker 1: anyth thing or should do anything. People listening to us like, oh,

532
00:30:04,080 --> 00:30:06,840
Speaker 1: well that was kind of insaneful. I get that, and

533
00:30:06,880 --> 00:30:12,840
Speaker 1: they choose to do absolutely nothing, that's totally okay. Or

534
00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:14,760
Speaker 1: if they're like, you know what, I think, I think

535
00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:16,880
Speaker 1: I'm going to ask a couple of questions and next

536
00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:19,280
Speaker 1: time somebody gives me advice to see how that goes

537
00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:26,120
Speaker 1: that's great, they're plugging in. This is very different than

538
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:28,440
Speaker 1: a one on one conversation.

539
00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:30,480
Speaker 3: I used to do, as I think you know and

540
00:30:30,600 --> 00:30:32,040
Speaker 3: some of my listeners now. I used to work on

541
00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:36,040
Speaker 3: a station in Melbourne radio station called SCN and for

542
00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:41,800
Speaker 3: probably twelve years, and in general terms the exercise science,

543
00:30:42,080 --> 00:30:46,400
Speaker 3: health wellness dude. And compared to I guess the other

544
00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:49,920
Speaker 3: people on air in that space, my knowledge was better

545
00:30:49,960 --> 00:30:51,520
Speaker 3: in all of that. But I would often get to

546
00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:55,560
Speaker 3: ask questions by because it's real time. So it's real

547
00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:59,760
Speaker 3: time radio, it's live, it's not a podcast, it's not

548
00:30:59,840 --> 00:31:02,840
Speaker 3: a workshop that's not being recorded. It's like thousands of

549
00:31:02,840 --> 00:31:06,120
Speaker 3: people listening. And I remember one day this guy rang

550
00:31:06,240 --> 00:31:10,320
Speaker 3: up and went harps. So when I do this movement,

551
00:31:10,440 --> 00:31:13,320
Speaker 3: I get clicking in my knee and I'm like, he's like,

552
00:31:13,400 --> 00:31:16,520
Speaker 3: what do you reckon that is? And I go, that's

553
00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:20,440
Speaker 3: definitely clicking in the knee. I go, bro, Not only

554
00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:25,400
Speaker 3: don't I know, I'm not a physiotherapist, I'm not an osteo,

555
00:31:25,440 --> 00:31:30,800
Speaker 3: I'm not a surgeon, I'm not a GP. Do I

556
00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:32,800
Speaker 3: have thoughts in my head right now of what it

557
00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:36,920
Speaker 3: might be? Yes? Could they be all wrong? Yes? I said,

558
00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:41,960
Speaker 3: I would be the most unprofessional fitness professional in Australia

559
00:31:42,040 --> 00:31:45,600
Speaker 3: if I started telling you diagnosing you the guy I've

560
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:48,520
Speaker 3: never met or seen with the knee that I can't

561
00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:51,600
Speaker 3: see even if I could see it right, And I

562
00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:53,320
Speaker 3: said to say, I just said to him, dide, you

563
00:31:53,360 --> 00:31:55,000
Speaker 3: need to go see a physio or an ostio or

564
00:31:55,040 --> 00:32:00,480
Speaker 3: a doctor. And he's like, oh really, but surely I go, no, mate, no, no,

565
00:32:00,840 --> 00:32:03,800
Speaker 3: like sometimes you've just got to go. I've had to

566
00:32:03,840 --> 00:32:07,440
Speaker 3: say many times, Look, I don't that's not my expertise.

567
00:32:08,280 --> 00:32:11,480
Speaker 3: If I have any expertise, I don't even know enough

568
00:32:11,520 --> 00:32:15,600
Speaker 3: about that to even pretend to give you what I

569
00:32:15,640 --> 00:32:20,520
Speaker 3: think is something in the vicinity of some insight, you know,

570
00:32:20,560 --> 00:32:22,960
Speaker 3: And I think that's when you are a coach, or

571
00:32:23,000 --> 00:32:26,680
Speaker 3: when you are an educator of some sort, or when

572
00:32:26,720 --> 00:32:29,280
Speaker 3: you and I think this is one of the dangers

573
00:32:29,280 --> 00:32:33,560
Speaker 3: of you know, some I say, some social media influencers

574
00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:36,280
Speaker 3: who are telling people to take all sorts of shit

575
00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:39,920
Speaker 3: that's never been tested really or you know this herbal,

576
00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:44,040
Speaker 3: that herbal, this peptide or that thing and this ll

577
00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:46,240
Speaker 3: like nobody wants you to know about this because of

578
00:32:46,280 --> 00:32:49,040
Speaker 3: Big Farmer. It's like that's the thing right now, Big farmer,

579
00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:51,240
Speaker 3: Big farmer, and I get it. I'm not a big

580
00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:54,880
Speaker 3: fan of Big Farmer, but you know, like swings and roundabouts,

581
00:32:54,880 --> 00:32:56,640
Speaker 3: there are some pretty good drugs that have helped people

582
00:32:56,680 --> 00:32:59,880
Speaker 3: a fucking lot. Let's be honest, and you know, this

583
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:04,440
Speaker 3: whole kind of it's everything's a fucking conspiracy and they

584
00:33:04,480 --> 00:33:07,280
Speaker 3: don't want you to know about why you should take

585
00:33:07,360 --> 00:33:10,120
Speaker 3: two cloves of garlic and some ginger every day because

586
00:33:10,560 --> 00:33:14,120
Speaker 3: that would send the pharmaceutical companies broke. I'm like, yeah,

587
00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:18,720
Speaker 3: probably not. Probably not Kevin, who's got his YouTube show

588
00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:22,200
Speaker 3: with seven followers. I don't know, keV. Maybe food for thought,

589
00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:24,240
Speaker 3: but not It.

590
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:28,120
Speaker 1: Might create distance between you and your family members. But

591
00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:31,120
Speaker 1: you know, you know what the worst part about that

592
00:33:31,160 --> 00:33:35,360
Speaker 1: whole thing is, I've got this clicking my shoulder.

593
00:33:35,400 --> 00:33:36,920
Speaker 2: I really wanted to ask you about.

594
00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:40,400
Speaker 3: That's funny. I was having a sip of coffee. You

595
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:46,040
Speaker 3: almost made me spid. Yeah, okay, So internal rotation, external rotation, abduction, sorry,

596
00:33:46,080 --> 00:33:48,840
Speaker 3: abduction of the humorous. What where do you feel it, Bobby?

597
00:33:49,480 --> 00:33:52,200
Speaker 3: What position? You know, on a ball, on a bench,

598
00:33:52,880 --> 00:33:56,640
Speaker 3: you know, cleaning your teeth, putting on a seat belt,

599
00:33:56,680 --> 00:34:01,320
Speaker 3: like everything, like, all, yeah, right, What you should probably do,

600
00:34:01,480 --> 00:34:06,440
Speaker 3: in my advice is, yeah, just start cooling your testicles,

601
00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:11,640
Speaker 3: because apparently cooler testicles greater testosterone production, your shoulder or

602
00:34:11,680 --> 00:34:14,239
Speaker 3: heal quicker. So put your balls in some ice and

603
00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:15,759
Speaker 3: call me in a week and let me know how

604
00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:16,240
Speaker 3: you've gone.

605
00:34:17,440 --> 00:34:18,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, got it.

606
00:34:20,560 --> 00:34:24,080
Speaker 3: When have you given advice that you Is there any

607
00:34:24,160 --> 00:34:27,759
Speaker 3: moment that you reflect on a specific one? Not like

608
00:34:27,920 --> 00:34:30,600
Speaker 3: I've done a hundred, but is there something I can

609
00:34:30,640 --> 00:34:34,640
Speaker 3: think of at least ten hundreds, but ten specific things

610
00:34:34,960 --> 00:34:37,240
Speaker 3: where I've gone, oh my god, why did I tell

611
00:34:37,280 --> 00:34:39,239
Speaker 3: them to do that? Or why did I suggest that?

612
00:34:39,440 --> 00:34:44,080
Speaker 3: Or is there one thing that you regret or look

613
00:34:44,160 --> 00:34:48,880
Speaker 3: back on with embarrassment that you a piece of advice

614
00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:50,640
Speaker 3: for one of a better term that you gave.

615
00:34:52,040 --> 00:34:55,040
Speaker 1: Oh well, I'm sure there's a lot of instances that

616
00:34:55,120 --> 00:34:58,440
Speaker 1: pops into my head right now. Is when I had

617
00:34:58,520 --> 00:35:01,239
Speaker 1: gotten back from remember where I moved to Australia.

618
00:35:01,280 --> 00:35:02,560
Speaker 2: I remember how fun that was?

619
00:35:03,520 --> 00:35:05,359
Speaker 3: That was a bull, wasn't it? And and for all

620
00:35:05,400 --> 00:35:08,319
Speaker 3: twelve minutes that you were here, we loved it. Now

621
00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:10,200
Speaker 3: you hear from a month, you hear from.

622
00:35:10,200 --> 00:35:14,560
Speaker 1: Us, Yeah, yeah, And then you know like everything fell apart.

623
00:35:14,600 --> 00:35:17,879
Speaker 1: And then I came home and like, my wife had

624
00:35:17,920 --> 00:35:21,040
Speaker 1: gone through a lot of stuff in her business, and

625
00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:27,120
Speaker 1: she was asking me for my advice about which film

626
00:35:27,200 --> 00:35:31,400
Speaker 1: festivals to go to, like invest In be part of.

627
00:35:31,520 --> 00:35:32,799
Speaker 2: She had a few invitations.

628
00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:36,479
Speaker 1: Of course, me, never being a filmmaker whatsoever, had lots

629
00:35:36,520 --> 00:35:40,600
Speaker 1: of opinions completely contradicting everything.

630
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:41,400
Speaker 2: I've said on this show.

631
00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:44,520
Speaker 1: It's like, wow, you know, and she's like everything I

632
00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:47,040
Speaker 1: told her to do was the exact opposite of what

633
00:35:47,160 --> 00:35:50,040
Speaker 1: she should have done. And I made a bad situation

634
00:35:50,480 --> 00:35:57,160
Speaker 1: even worse. So yeah, that was That was great. But

635
00:35:57,400 --> 00:36:00,319
Speaker 1: right around that time in my life, I was saying

636
00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:03,960
Speaker 1: all the wrong things, doing all the wrong things at

637
00:36:04,000 --> 00:36:07,120
Speaker 1: the worst possible time with the worst possible people.

638
00:36:08,160 --> 00:36:13,120
Speaker 3: So do you ever recognize yourself? Okay, I am not

639
00:36:13,200 --> 00:36:17,360
Speaker 3: a great I'm not in a great space today me personally,

640
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:22,000
Speaker 3: like emotionally or mentally or even physically. You don't want

641
00:36:22,040 --> 00:36:26,320
Speaker 3: to ask me anything today like I'm not like today.

642
00:36:26,360 --> 00:36:28,480
Speaker 3: For example, people know I've been dealing with a few

643
00:36:28,520 --> 00:36:31,120
Speaker 3: things just with my health. I'm fine, but today I

644
00:36:31,120 --> 00:36:34,160
Speaker 3: feel really fucking good. But one day this week I

645
00:36:34,280 --> 00:36:38,480
Speaker 3: was so smashed. I felt like I had chronic fatigue

646
00:36:38,520 --> 00:36:42,720
Speaker 3: time six for one day, and I just I felt sad,

647
00:36:42,920 --> 00:36:47,080
Speaker 3: I felt shit, and a bunch of people rang me

648
00:36:47,120 --> 00:36:50,000
Speaker 3: and I didn't answer any calls because I thought, I'm

649
00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:52,279
Speaker 3: not going to be good on this call. I don't

650
00:36:52,280 --> 00:36:55,880
Speaker 3: want to answer their questions. I don't want to whatever it.

651
00:36:56,080 --> 00:36:58,480
Speaker 3: Even if they're just ringing up to chat, it will

652
00:36:58,520 --> 00:37:00,759
Speaker 3: not be a good chat for them. And I wasn't

653
00:37:00,800 --> 00:37:05,160
Speaker 3: grumpy or angry, but I just recognize I try to

654
00:37:05,239 --> 00:37:09,600
Speaker 3: recognize my own bullshit or when I am mentally, emotionally

655
00:37:09,719 --> 00:37:12,880
Speaker 3: or physically in a place where whatever I'm going to do,

656
00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:16,760
Speaker 3: unless it's a pre arranged thing that I cannot avoid,

657
00:37:17,760 --> 00:37:20,200
Speaker 3: there are times when I just cancel stuff because I

658
00:37:20,280 --> 00:37:23,440
Speaker 3: know today I'm not going to be good and just

659
00:37:24,239 --> 00:37:28,080
Speaker 3: recognize the limitation that is me in the situation.

660
00:37:29,719 --> 00:37:34,120
Speaker 1: I think that's self awareness and emotional maturity. Absolutely. I

661
00:37:34,120 --> 00:37:37,359
Speaker 1: think that is a very positive thing to do. It's

662
00:37:37,400 --> 00:37:40,160
Speaker 1: like I am in this state right now and I'm not.

663
00:37:40,360 --> 00:37:43,520
Speaker 1: I mean sometimes, obviously, as you said, you can't do that.

664
00:37:43,640 --> 00:37:48,239
Speaker 1: You have albums that exceed what mental state you're in

665
00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:51,359
Speaker 1: at the moment. But if you can do that, and

666
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:55,200
Speaker 1: there is a need. I think having that conversation is

667
00:37:55,320 --> 00:37:59,719
Speaker 1: very important to people. And it's not like, no, I'm

668
00:37:59,760 --> 00:38:01,759
Speaker 1: just not in the mental space say hey, you know

669
00:38:02,160 --> 00:38:05,440
Speaker 1: you're asking me for A and B and hey, that's

670
00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:07,600
Speaker 1: kind of a rough day for me. What about I

671
00:38:07,719 --> 00:38:11,880
Speaker 1: propose C like can we reconvene on Thursday? Maybe like

672
00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:15,960
Speaker 1: proposing a solution rather than I'm just I was on

673
00:38:16,080 --> 00:38:18,920
Speaker 1: the phone with somebody it was very important in my

674
00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:21,799
Speaker 1: personal life, and they were just like, I just don't

675
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:25,480
Speaker 1: have the bandwidth for this conversation. And I was like,

676
00:38:26,120 --> 00:38:28,160
Speaker 1: is that because they're having a bad day or is

677
00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:33,040
Speaker 1: that just because like the conversations with me? And it's

678
00:38:33,120 --> 00:38:37,200
Speaker 1: like I'm just frustrating them with what we're talking about.

679
00:38:37,520 --> 00:38:39,480
Speaker 1: And I was just I left that I was scratching

680
00:38:39,520 --> 00:38:42,120
Speaker 1: my head. There was no further explanation given.

681
00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:45,040
Speaker 3: It's like, Okay, I remember you telling this story a

682
00:38:45,040 --> 00:38:47,040
Speaker 3: weak or two ago about the lady that I think

683
00:38:47,040 --> 00:38:48,920
Speaker 3: he had a zoom call with something to do with

684
00:38:49,040 --> 00:38:52,480
Speaker 3: coaching or she was in part of the coaching course

685
00:38:52,560 --> 00:38:55,560
Speaker 3: that you were doing, and you looked at her and

686
00:38:55,600 --> 00:38:58,920
Speaker 3: you saw straight up that she wasn't great. She looked

687
00:38:58,960 --> 00:39:00,200
Speaker 3: like she'd been crying.

688
00:39:00,800 --> 00:39:01,359
Speaker 2: Oh, my god.

689
00:39:01,520 --> 00:39:05,879
Speaker 1: No, okay, yeah, I cushioned that actually because I felt

690
00:39:06,000 --> 00:39:10,200
Speaker 1: really weird telling that story. She was hysterically crying right

691
00:39:10,440 --> 00:39:13,040
Speaker 1: like like I can't, Oh my god, my marriage just

692
00:39:13,040 --> 00:39:16,840
Speaker 1: fell apart everything. But it was it was so extreme

693
00:39:16,880 --> 00:39:18,920
Speaker 1: that at first I was like, oh my god, is.

694
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:22,440
Speaker 2: This is this the practical test? This is intense. I

695
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:25,000
Speaker 2: don't think I've prepared for this. I would have failed

696
00:39:25,000 --> 00:39:26,239
Speaker 2: this thing. What do I do?

697
00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:29,279
Speaker 1: And it turned out that it was legit that that

698
00:39:29,400 --> 00:39:31,719
Speaker 1: literally her whole life blew up that day.

699
00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:33,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was just.

700
00:39:33,760 --> 00:39:35,480
Speaker 3: Well, that's a good that's a good day not to

701
00:39:35,560 --> 00:39:39,279
Speaker 3: do work. That's a good day not to try to

702
00:39:39,280 --> 00:39:42,719
Speaker 3: give other people advice when when you're just clinging onto

703
00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:47,320
Speaker 3: your sanity and your emotional stability by a thread.

704
00:39:48,200 --> 00:39:51,680
Speaker 1: I felt horrible for her because like we've had that,

705
00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:54,880
Speaker 1: like where someone we love something's gone very wrong in

706
00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:57,480
Speaker 1: a very maybe the most important relationship in our lives.

707
00:39:57,760 --> 00:39:59,800
Speaker 1: So I could relate to how that feels.

708
00:40:00,160 --> 00:40:00,480
Speaker 2: I was.

709
00:40:00,600 --> 00:40:05,759
Speaker 1: I also remember being so grateful for her having the

710
00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:11,200
Speaker 1: self awareness, maility and the courage to not just try

711
00:40:11,239 --> 00:40:15,279
Speaker 1: to pull herself together and just like go through it

712
00:40:15,480 --> 00:40:18,880
Speaker 1: with me on my practical exam so I felt so

713
00:40:19,280 --> 00:40:20,160
Speaker 1: grateful for her.

714
00:40:20,920 --> 00:40:23,160
Speaker 3: Okay, So I don't know if we've figured out if

715
00:40:23,200 --> 00:40:25,200
Speaker 3: giving advice is a good thing or a bad thing.

716
00:40:25,239 --> 00:40:29,720
Speaker 3: I think it some depends on the situation, context, person issue,

717
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:34,400
Speaker 3: all of that. But so let's wind up, and I

718
00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:40,919
Speaker 3: want you obviously everyone, this is all unprompted, so as

719
00:40:40,960 --> 00:40:44,640
Speaker 3: in unprepared. So is there any advice that you have,

720
00:40:45,160 --> 00:40:48,200
Speaker 3: ironically or are there any things that you think people

721
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:53,239
Speaker 3: should be mindful of in the context of navigating the

722
00:40:53,360 --> 00:40:55,480
Speaker 3: should I shouldn't I advice space?

723
00:40:56,880 --> 00:41:00,319
Speaker 1: Yeah, but before you know one, check in with your self.

724
00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:05,160
Speaker 1: Are you emotionally attached to giving advice? And I don't

725
00:41:05,200 --> 00:41:08,480
Speaker 1: mean like it's all about you, but with the example

726
00:41:08,560 --> 00:41:12,799
Speaker 1: with your mom and smoking, that's a very difficult situation.

727
00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:15,720
Speaker 1: When you see someone that you're you love very much

728
00:41:16,120 --> 00:41:21,640
Speaker 1: and they're doing something that is potentially damaging and especially

729
00:41:21,719 --> 00:41:26,240
Speaker 1: if negative consequence has come to fruition, that's a lot.

730
00:41:26,640 --> 00:41:28,839
Speaker 1: But check in with yourself this is there something you're

731
00:41:29,000 --> 00:41:32,839
Speaker 1: needing personally in that advice? Is there something that you

732
00:41:32,880 --> 00:41:37,080
Speaker 1: are attached to in the moment, like on a personal

733
00:41:37,120 --> 00:41:43,120
Speaker 1: importance level? Ten I absolutely need to say this one. Well,

734
00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:47,040
Speaker 1: I'm here, but you know it's not something that I

735
00:41:47,120 --> 00:41:49,279
Speaker 1: personally need. If you're at a level nine or ten,

736
00:41:49,440 --> 00:41:53,120
Speaker 1: if it can wait, don't say anything that day. If

737
00:41:53,160 --> 00:41:57,359
Speaker 1: it is urgent and emergent, yeah, like go for it,

738
00:41:57,719 --> 00:42:02,240
Speaker 1: because the damage of inaction is probably the exceeding the

739
00:42:02,280 --> 00:42:06,680
Speaker 1: consequences of somebody not taking your advice. So that's first

740
00:42:06,719 --> 00:42:09,080
Speaker 1: of well, check in with yourself and then check in

741
00:42:09,120 --> 00:42:12,920
Speaker 1: with the other person, like are they in a place

742
00:42:13,120 --> 00:42:16,440
Speaker 1: of high emotional arousal, because sometimes I might just be

743
00:42:16,480 --> 00:42:21,480
Speaker 1: asking for advice because I'm very attached and desperate around

744
00:42:21,520 --> 00:42:23,839
Speaker 1: something that may not be an issue two weeks from now.

745
00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:27,640
Speaker 1: So check in with yourself, check in with them, and

746
00:42:28,000 --> 00:42:34,319
Speaker 1: if possible, ask more questions before delivering insights to kind

747
00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:37,799
Speaker 1: of identify what is the context around this and what

748
00:42:37,880 --> 00:42:39,799
Speaker 1: are they really looking for?

749
00:42:39,960 --> 00:42:43,960
Speaker 2: What are their intentions? Again? Is it just the sounding board.

750
00:42:44,040 --> 00:42:47,359
Speaker 1: Are they looking for someone to affirm a decision that

751
00:42:47,360 --> 00:42:50,839
Speaker 1: they're about to make, or are they really have they

752
00:42:50,880 --> 00:42:53,359
Speaker 1: come to the end of their own area of expertise

753
00:42:54,320 --> 00:42:56,480
Speaker 1: and they really want to know, Hey, what would you do?

754
00:42:57,520 --> 00:43:00,920
Speaker 1: And then make your decision empathetically based on what is

755
00:43:00,960 --> 00:43:04,400
Speaker 1: in the best interest of the individual in that moment

756
00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:08,040
Speaker 1: and just understand you're never going to have the exact

757
00:43:08,120 --> 00:43:10,799
Speaker 1: rate response or the right feedback or the right thing

758
00:43:10,880 --> 00:43:14,000
Speaker 1: to say. But you can't say the wrong thing to

759
00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:18,960
Speaker 1: the right person if there's trust in the relationship. Conversely,

760
00:43:19,520 --> 00:43:21,680
Speaker 1: you can't you know, you can't say the right thing

761
00:43:21,719 --> 00:43:25,600
Speaker 1: to the wrong person if someone's completely not prepared to hear.

762
00:43:25,520 --> 00:43:28,360
Speaker 2: What you have to say. It might be about to

763
00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:28,759
Speaker 2: say it.

764
00:43:29,239 --> 00:43:31,800
Speaker 3: Well, my mum didn't talk to me for three months

765
00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:35,840
Speaker 3: when I started banging on like almost my last stand

766
00:43:36,440 --> 00:43:39,040
Speaker 3: where it was probably a bit melodramatic about the smoking.

767
00:43:39,600 --> 00:43:41,239
Speaker 2: Well that's that's clear feedback.

768
00:43:41,680 --> 00:43:44,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's feedback. And Mary talks to me all the time.

769
00:43:44,560 --> 00:43:47,360
Speaker 3: She was so fucked off at me, a little angry

770
00:43:47,520 --> 00:43:50,560
Speaker 3: five foot weapon that she is, fucking Yoda of the family.

771
00:43:50,680 --> 00:43:51,040
Speaker 2: She was.

772
00:43:51,320 --> 00:43:55,080
Speaker 3: She shut me down like a fucking cheap stallsale. You know,

773
00:43:55,160 --> 00:44:00,440
Speaker 3: it's like, ah, what one of the things, like, I know,

774
00:44:00,480 --> 00:44:04,279
Speaker 3: we're winding up. But one of the very unusual for

775
00:44:04,360 --> 00:44:09,160
Speaker 3: most people would be this kind of scenario where I reckon.

776
00:44:09,280 --> 00:44:13,719
Speaker 3: In the last forty years I have had at least

777
00:44:14,719 --> 00:44:17,359
Speaker 3: which doesn't sound a lot over forty years, but it

778
00:44:17,480 --> 00:44:21,200
Speaker 3: is one hundred conversations with a person or persons, often

779
00:44:21,239 --> 00:44:24,480
Speaker 3: business partners or husbands and wives who want to set

780
00:44:24,560 --> 00:44:27,719
Speaker 3: up a PT studio. So let's go see the guy

781
00:44:27,719 --> 00:44:29,719
Speaker 3: who set up the first one. Let's see the guy

782
00:44:29,719 --> 00:44:31,759
Speaker 3: who set up the biggest one. Let's talk to that guy.

783
00:44:32,600 --> 00:44:40,600
Speaker 3: And that is a tricky conversation to navigate because firstly,

784
00:44:40,760 --> 00:44:44,440
Speaker 3: most personal training centers don't work over the if you

785
00:44:44,520 --> 00:44:47,520
Speaker 3: call it, you know, surviving for a few years they work,

786
00:44:47,800 --> 00:44:50,680
Speaker 3: But if you're talking about flourishing over ten twenty thirty years,

787
00:44:50,719 --> 00:44:54,880
Speaker 3: they don't. And then then trying to figure out all

788
00:44:54,920 --> 00:44:58,000
Speaker 3: of the variables around the commercial stuff, the financial stuff,

789
00:44:58,000 --> 00:45:01,440
Speaker 3: the personality stuff that works stuff, the effort, the energy,

790
00:45:01,480 --> 00:45:05,080
Speaker 3: the sacrifice, the risk, that all the stuff you know.

791
00:45:05,920 --> 00:45:09,160
Speaker 3: And I would say to people regularly, I cannot tell

792
00:45:09,200 --> 00:45:11,640
Speaker 3: you what to do, but I would tell you these

793
00:45:11,680 --> 00:45:14,360
Speaker 3: are the things that I would consider, and this is

794
00:45:14,440 --> 00:45:16,759
Speaker 3: how I did it, and this is what worked for

795
00:45:16,800 --> 00:45:20,080
Speaker 3: me and what didn't work for me. But let's remember

796
00:45:20,160 --> 00:45:23,919
Speaker 3: you are not me. It's like the way that I live.

797
00:45:24,120 --> 00:45:27,720
Speaker 3: I would not recommend to anyone. I would never advise

798
00:45:27,800 --> 00:45:32,160
Speaker 3: anyone take my path because I think it was a

799
00:45:32,200 --> 00:45:35,280
Speaker 3: good path. Good path for me, but not for most people.

800
00:45:35,640 --> 00:45:38,879
Speaker 3: So just coming from that, yeah, I can't tell you.

801
00:45:38,920 --> 00:45:41,640
Speaker 3: And I know I've had people fly from many people

802
00:45:41,680 --> 00:45:44,840
Speaker 3: fly from into state to spend a half dayish or

803
00:45:44,840 --> 00:45:48,120
Speaker 3: whatever just going through this, and would usually do it

804
00:45:48,160 --> 00:45:51,480
Speaker 3: on a whiteboard, drinking coffee in a room in my house.

805
00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:57,480
Speaker 3: And you know, it's like, yeah, I know what you're

806
00:45:57,520 --> 00:46:00,560
Speaker 3: wanting to hear. You kind of almost want to formula.

807
00:46:00,719 --> 00:46:03,440
Speaker 3: I can't give you one because my formula would be

808
00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:07,759
Speaker 3: a fucking catastrophe for you. But just leaning into the

809
00:46:08,360 --> 00:46:09,920
Speaker 3: why why do you want to do this? What do

810
00:46:09,960 --> 00:46:14,040
Speaker 3: you think? What do you think? Eighteen months into working

811
00:46:14,160 --> 00:46:16,440
Speaker 3: night and day, maybe seven days a week on this

812
00:46:16,560 --> 00:46:20,640
Speaker 3: business where it's precarious because in the street that you're

813
00:46:20,680 --> 00:46:24,040
Speaker 3: setting up there are five other pt studios, not to

814
00:46:24,080 --> 00:46:26,799
Speaker 3: mention pilarates, not to mention twenty four hour gyms, not

815
00:46:26,880 --> 00:46:29,960
Speaker 3: to mention spin studios, not to mention a range of

816
00:46:29,960 --> 00:46:33,439
Speaker 3: different martial arts, not to mention a fucking rock climbing gym, And.

817
00:46:33,840 --> 00:46:35,640
Speaker 2: So you're not just people on that street.

818
00:46:36,120 --> 00:46:39,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, well this is Hampton Street, dude, Apart from the

819
00:46:39,160 --> 00:46:42,600
Speaker 3: rock climbing, that is Hampton Street. And so not only

820
00:46:42,640 --> 00:46:45,600
Speaker 3: you're cutting the personal training pie, you're cutting the fitness

821
00:46:45,640 --> 00:46:48,080
Speaker 3: pie because people can go you don't need.

822
00:46:48,000 --> 00:46:48,480
Speaker 2: To train it.

823
00:46:48,560 --> 00:46:51,239
Speaker 3: Come rock climbing, or come do forty five, or come

824
00:46:51,280 --> 00:46:54,839
Speaker 3: do CrossFit, or come do that high drox or come

825
00:46:54,880 --> 00:46:57,600
Speaker 3: do like there's so many options for people who want

826
00:46:57,600 --> 00:47:01,560
Speaker 3: to change their body in some way that Yeah, it's like, oh,

827
00:47:01,600 --> 00:47:05,120
Speaker 3: it's and also since I started, Like when I started,

828
00:47:05,160 --> 00:47:09,239
Speaker 3: I had no competitors, Like how lucky was I. It's like,

829
00:47:09,960 --> 00:47:12,600
Speaker 3: let me think about what all the other PT studios

830
00:47:12,680 --> 00:47:15,080
Speaker 3: that don't exist are doing. It's like, no, well, just

831
00:47:16,200 --> 00:47:18,200
Speaker 3: if I fucked up, it would have been totally me

832
00:47:18,320 --> 00:47:22,120
Speaker 3: because I, essentially, in that space had no competition. So yeah,

833
00:47:22,160 --> 00:47:29,279
Speaker 3: it's it's a it's an interesting territory to navigate when

834
00:47:29,360 --> 00:47:33,080
Speaker 3: you're talking in things like that where there is no

835
00:47:33,239 --> 00:47:35,360
Speaker 3: real right or wrong specifically.

836
00:47:38,560 --> 00:47:41,799
Speaker 1: Yep, there's there's a lot of variables. What I love

837
00:47:41,840 --> 00:47:45,600
Speaker 1: about that is this is what has worked for me. Yes,

838
00:47:45,680 --> 00:47:49,080
Speaker 1: that's really mean, it's going to be what works for you.

839
00:47:50,440 --> 00:47:53,719
Speaker 3: Last question before we go, what is one thing for

840
00:47:53,760 --> 00:47:57,640
Speaker 3: you that you thought would work for you, not for

841
00:47:57,680 --> 00:47:59,640
Speaker 3: anyone else, but what you thought was going to be

842
00:47:59,680 --> 00:48:01,640
Speaker 3: the next big thing. Or light you on fire, and

843
00:48:01,680 --> 00:48:03,759
Speaker 3: that was going to be your destiny or journey or

844
00:48:03,800 --> 00:48:10,400
Speaker 3: path which you realized or had an epiphany or just

845
00:48:10,480 --> 00:48:15,360
Speaker 3: discovered as a byproduct of results that turned out to

846
00:48:15,400 --> 00:48:16,520
Speaker 3: be not the case.

847
00:48:18,400 --> 00:48:24,440
Speaker 1: Maybe going into one of my businesses, I had thought

848
00:48:24,600 --> 00:48:27,640
Speaker 1: at one point, not that the business would endure forever,

849
00:48:28,400 --> 00:48:30,920
Speaker 1: but that the path I was on and the people

850
00:48:31,000 --> 00:48:34,440
Speaker 1: I was on that path with or where I was

851
00:48:34,520 --> 00:48:35,120
Speaker 1: going to spend the.

852
00:48:35,120 --> 00:48:35,839
Speaker 2: Rest of my life.

853
00:48:36,640 --> 00:48:39,880
Speaker 1: Right, I got into my head, this is this is

854
00:48:40,040 --> 00:48:44,040
Speaker 1: this is my people, this is this is my geographical

855
00:48:44,800 --> 00:48:48,520
Speaker 1: kind of destiny, this is this is my career path.

856
00:48:49,280 --> 00:48:52,640
Speaker 1: And no, it did not work out like that at all.

857
00:48:53,239 --> 00:48:55,320
Speaker 3: I think I know what you're talking about. Heim I

858
00:48:56,000 --> 00:49:00,000
Speaker 3: love you. Always good to talk to you. The self

859
00:49:00,120 --> 00:49:04,920
Speaker 3: help antidote is Bobby's show is his podcast. Robert Capuccio

860
00:49:05,239 --> 00:49:09,800
Speaker 3: dot Com is his websites. You can find him on LinkedIn.

861
00:49:10,400 --> 00:49:11,640
Speaker 3: Better than Instagram for.

862
00:49:11,640 --> 00:49:14,520
Speaker 2: You, Yeah, definitely better than an Instagram.

863
00:49:14,600 --> 00:49:17,640
Speaker 3: Yeh. He's still coaching people, by the by the way,

864
00:49:17,800 --> 00:49:20,640
Speaker 3: like he's still available. Can people online coach with you?

865
00:49:22,000 --> 00:49:26,279
Speaker 1: It's a case bake case basis, Like my job is

866
00:49:26,360 --> 00:49:29,640
Speaker 1: coaching a lot of it. So I don't really take

867
00:49:29,680 --> 00:49:32,960
Speaker 1: on private clients, not saying I wouldn't.

868
00:49:32,640 --> 00:49:33,480
Speaker 3: It just it would.

869
00:49:33,600 --> 00:49:35,640
Speaker 2: It would just be a case bake case basis would

870
00:49:35,680 --> 00:49:38,480
Speaker 2: depend on on why and why.

871
00:49:38,719 --> 00:49:42,520
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, I took on a client recently and I

872
00:49:42,560 --> 00:49:46,080
Speaker 3: don't I'm like you, And we did one session. I

873
00:49:46,120 --> 00:49:47,840
Speaker 3: love this dude. I can't say who he is, but

874
00:49:47,960 --> 00:49:51,640
Speaker 3: he's got a very high level job, really good guy.

875
00:49:51,920 --> 00:49:55,680
Speaker 3: And we spoke the first week on Zoom like this,

876
00:49:56,920 --> 00:49:59,440
Speaker 3: and the next week he sent me a message. No,

877
00:49:59,600 --> 00:50:01,759
Speaker 3: I said him a message because half the time, like

878
00:50:01,800 --> 00:50:05,400
Speaker 3: we're talking about work related stuff and him and performance

879
00:50:05,440 --> 00:50:07,880
Speaker 3: and other people and dynamics and just all the normal

880
00:50:07,880 --> 00:50:11,160
Speaker 3: shit you talk about with kind of corporate coaching. And

881
00:50:11,200 --> 00:50:13,560
Speaker 3: I discovered he's like he's a meathead, Like he's a

882
00:50:13,719 --> 00:50:16,920
Speaker 3: very educated meathead. He loves the gym and so and

883
00:50:17,000 --> 00:50:21,440
Speaker 3: this is weird, Like this is how flexible for me

884
00:50:21,719 --> 00:50:24,880
Speaker 3: this stuff can be? And how buy the books? I

885
00:50:24,920 --> 00:50:27,200
Speaker 3: am not? I said, hey, mate, do you want to

886
00:50:27,200 --> 00:50:30,000
Speaker 3: do the next session at the gym so we can

887
00:50:30,040 --> 00:50:32,280
Speaker 3: lift shit and talk about shit and then have a coffee.

888
00:50:32,320 --> 00:50:35,239
Speaker 3: He's like, fuck, is that possible? I'm like, yeah, dude,

889
00:50:35,239 --> 00:50:38,000
Speaker 3: would you like that? I go much better than talking

890
00:50:38,040 --> 00:50:40,719
Speaker 3: on a fucking computer for an hour. And so now

891
00:50:40,719 --> 00:50:43,680
Speaker 3: we do that. It's the best. Like it's the first

892
00:50:43,719 --> 00:50:46,759
Speaker 3: time I've trained anyone in inverted commas, like in any

893
00:50:46,840 --> 00:50:51,080
Speaker 3: kind of professional context. I'm talking about training, I'm talking

894
00:50:51,080 --> 00:50:53,560
Speaker 3: about conditioning and stuff.

895
00:50:53,719 --> 00:50:56,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, for ten years, And it's such ability to build

896
00:50:57,000 --> 00:51:00,439
Speaker 1: community at the gem, Like I'm like one of those

897
00:51:00,440 --> 00:51:02,200
Speaker 1: people that when I go to the gym, I don't

898
00:51:02,280 --> 00:51:04,800
Speaker 1: talk to anyone.

899
00:51:04,600 --> 00:51:08,680
Speaker 2: Right, no, I don't even make eye contact. But like

900
00:51:09,080 --> 00:51:12,360
Speaker 2: the community at the gym down by Hampton that you've built,

901
00:51:12,520 --> 00:51:14,879
Speaker 2: I love that, do you know what I love?

902
00:51:15,120 --> 00:51:17,719
Speaker 3: I love that though, Like just before we got on air,

903
00:51:18,040 --> 00:51:21,279
Speaker 3: you saw me drinking coffee through the show. Right, I

904
00:51:21,360 --> 00:51:23,399
Speaker 3: live across the road from a cafe that I don't

905
00:51:23,480 --> 00:51:25,919
Speaker 3: go to very often, but the last time I was there, well,

906
00:51:26,000 --> 00:51:28,719
Speaker 3: i'd probably go once a week. But the last time

907
00:51:28,760 --> 00:51:33,520
Speaker 3: I was there, this same young lady, I guess twenty,

908
00:51:33,680 --> 00:51:37,040
Speaker 3: I don't know, two three four. While she was making

909
00:51:37,040 --> 00:51:40,279
Speaker 3: my coffee, she was singing. I'm like, I so loved it,

910
00:51:40,360 --> 00:51:45,600
Speaker 3: and she can sing. She can sing right, great coffee,

911
00:51:45,719 --> 00:51:47,719
Speaker 3: great voice. I'm like, this is the best coffee ever.

912
00:51:47,760 --> 00:51:49,839
Speaker 3: And then I went back in just before the show

913
00:51:49,880 --> 00:51:52,400
Speaker 3: to get another coffee and she was there. I'm like,

914
00:51:52,600 --> 00:51:55,960
Speaker 3: it's the singer and she laughed. I go, do you

915
00:51:56,040 --> 00:51:58,400
Speaker 3: sing sing? Or did you just sing when you make coffee?

916
00:51:58,520 --> 00:52:01,440
Speaker 3: She goes, no, I'm sing in a bunch of bands

917
00:52:01,440 --> 00:52:05,160
Speaker 3: and this and that, and she was so happy that

918
00:52:05,239 --> 00:52:08,600
Speaker 3: I recognized her. I hope she doesn't listen to this,

919
00:52:08,640 --> 00:52:11,040
Speaker 3: because she asked me what the show is called. But anyway,

920
00:52:11,080 --> 00:52:14,480
Speaker 3: if you're listening, I think your ace. And then we

921
00:52:14,560 --> 00:52:16,880
Speaker 3: had this beautiful chat for three or four minutes. She's like,

922
00:52:16,920 --> 00:52:19,680
Speaker 3: what do you do. I go like, ah, I don't

923
00:52:19,719 --> 00:52:21,879
Speaker 3: really know. Like I gave her an insight and it's

924
00:52:21,960 --> 00:52:23,799
Speaker 3: like a bit of this and a bit of that,

925
00:52:23,880 --> 00:52:26,680
Speaker 3: you know, and but it's just to have an encounter

926
00:52:26,719 --> 00:52:30,880
Speaker 3: with somebody. Three minutes. It was fun. And then I

927
00:52:30,920 --> 00:52:32,640
Speaker 3: walk out the door. I turn around, I go, see

928
00:52:32,640 --> 00:52:35,200
Speaker 3: you sing? I keep singing and she laughed. All good.

929
00:52:35,680 --> 00:52:40,080
Speaker 3: It's like just those moments, like to have an encounter

930
00:52:40,120 --> 00:52:43,840
Speaker 3: with someone where it's like win win. It's like just

931
00:52:44,080 --> 00:52:45,959
Speaker 3: energy energy, and.

932
00:52:45,880 --> 00:52:48,640
Speaker 1: I'm totally a sucker for talent. And on that note,

933
00:52:48,719 --> 00:52:50,560
Speaker 1: I've got to get to an improv show.

934
00:52:51,000 --> 00:52:53,759
Speaker 3: All right, dude, it's been great. Love your guts. I'll

935
00:52:54,320 --> 00:52:55,919
Speaker 3: everyone talk to you soon.

936
00:52:56,680 --> 00:52:57,000
Speaker 2: Bye bye