1 00:00:05,921 --> 00:00:07,281 Speaker 1: Apoday production. 2 00:00:10,121 --> 00:00:13,521 Speaker 2: We begin today by acknowledging the traditional custodians of the 3 00:00:13,601 --> 00:00:16,401 Speaker 2: land on which we gather today and pay our respects 4 00:00:16,481 --> 00:00:19,641 Speaker 2: to their elders past and present. We extend that respect 5 00:00:19,761 --> 00:00:22,881 Speaker 2: to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people's here today. 6 00:00:25,081 --> 00:00:28,801 Speaker 3: Welcome to the Grow and Glow Podcast. I'm Ashy, I'm Kiara. 7 00:00:28,961 --> 00:00:31,321 Speaker 3: This is a podcast where we learn, laugh, and level 8 00:00:31,401 --> 00:00:31,841 Speaker 3: up together. 9 00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:33,201 Speaker 1: Let's go deep, let. 10 00:00:33,081 --> 00:00:35,241 Speaker 3: The emotions flow, and find the lessons to. 11 00:00:35,281 --> 00:00:37,801 Speaker 1: Grow and Glow. Nothing is off the table with Grow 12 00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:44,001 Speaker 1: and Glow and we're here to be your expander. Welcome 13 00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:46,520 Speaker 1: back to the show, Grow and Glow. Welcome back. 14 00:00:46,641 --> 00:00:51,200 Speaker 3: We've got an exciting guest today, very exciting, a beautiful girlfriend, Tiana. 15 00:00:51,281 --> 00:00:52,281 Speaker 1: Welcome to Grow and Glow. 16 00:00:52,441 --> 00:00:54,361 Speaker 4: Thank you so much for having me. It's a pleasure 17 00:00:54,401 --> 00:00:56,161 Speaker 4: to be here. I'm super excited for this conversation. 18 00:00:56,361 --> 00:00:59,001 Speaker 1: We are so excited to have you. But you want 19 00:00:59,001 --> 00:01:00,801 Speaker 1: to give us littlerundown on who you are and what 20 00:01:00,881 --> 00:01:02,721 Speaker 1: you do for work, because I think it's obviously very 21 00:01:02,801 --> 00:01:03,960 Speaker 1: relevant to our audience. 22 00:01:04,241 --> 00:01:06,761 Speaker 4: Absolutely, yes. So what I do essentially is I help 23 00:01:06,840 --> 00:01:10,721 Speaker 4: women build self worth. So essentially I help women take 24 00:01:10,721 --> 00:01:13,521 Speaker 4: off the cool girl mask and really tap into like 25 00:01:13,560 --> 00:01:16,081 Speaker 4: their most authentic self. And a lot of the times, 26 00:01:16,121 --> 00:01:19,161 Speaker 4: like women struggle with that, with insecurities and things like that, 27 00:01:19,241 --> 00:01:21,681 Speaker 4: and so for me, it's about pulling back those layers 28 00:01:21,721 --> 00:01:25,321 Speaker 4: and like unraveling and revealing who they actually are at 29 00:01:25,321 --> 00:01:27,081 Speaker 4: their core as opposed to the person that they need 30 00:01:27,121 --> 00:01:28,121 Speaker 4: to present themselves as. 31 00:01:28,521 --> 00:01:30,801 Speaker 1: Wow, I love that, like cool girl masks. I feel 32 00:01:30,801 --> 00:01:33,041 Speaker 1: like we all definitely put that on sometimes to be 33 00:01:33,121 --> 00:01:36,001 Speaker 1: accepted and to be loved. Oh, I'm so excited to 34 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:36,880 Speaker 1: get in this conversation. 35 00:01:37,681 --> 00:01:38,601 Speaker 3: But fat. 36 00:01:41,721 --> 00:01:43,401 Speaker 1: Got a share of the week. So every single week 37 00:01:43,441 --> 00:01:45,720 Speaker 1: here and I share something that we're absolutely loving that 38 00:01:45,761 --> 00:01:48,641 Speaker 1: we're obsessed with that we've started doing a product. What's 39 00:01:48,641 --> 00:01:50,081 Speaker 1: something that you were loving right now? 40 00:01:50,641 --> 00:01:52,721 Speaker 4: Oh, this is a good question. Okay, So at the moment, 41 00:01:52,801 --> 00:01:55,361 Speaker 4: I've been really taking the time to rest. So for me, 42 00:01:55,441 --> 00:01:58,201 Speaker 4: it's been really go, go go recently, and it's just 43 00:01:58,241 --> 00:02:00,321 Speaker 4: been so chaotic. But you know, when you get into 44 00:02:00,321 --> 00:02:02,121 Speaker 4: that flow of things where you just don't even realize 45 00:02:02,121 --> 00:02:04,201 Speaker 4: that you're just kind of like working on autopilot. I 46 00:02:04,241 --> 00:02:07,160 Speaker 4: was doing that for so long. Yeah, yeah, and you're 47 00:02:07,201 --> 00:02:08,841 Speaker 4: just doing things for the sake of doing things. So 48 00:02:08,881 --> 00:02:13,081 Speaker 4: for me, it has been slowing down, re implementing my bedtime, 49 00:02:13,201 --> 00:02:15,361 Speaker 4: getting up early in the morning, and just really making 50 00:02:15,401 --> 00:02:19,001 Speaker 4: time to like schedule out like rest time, like actually 51 00:02:19,001 --> 00:02:21,561 Speaker 4: putting it into my calendar and being like, for this 52 00:02:21,680 --> 00:02:25,321 Speaker 4: two hours, I'm doing nothing and it's been so beautiful. Yeah, 53 00:02:25,361 --> 00:02:25,961 Speaker 4: that's awesome. 54 00:02:26,001 --> 00:02:27,761 Speaker 1: I've been trying to practice that more too. Hey, it 55 00:02:27,841 --> 00:02:30,281 Speaker 1: is like resting and giving yourself permission to do it. 56 00:02:30,281 --> 00:02:32,361 Speaker 1: Like I was talking to you about, I don't watch 57 00:02:32,361 --> 00:02:33,721 Speaker 1: a lot of TV with the kids, but I was 58 00:02:33,721 --> 00:02:36,401 Speaker 1: messaging Tianna this morning and I was like, last night, 59 00:02:36,441 --> 00:02:37,681 Speaker 1: Seve was out a dinner. I was like, we're going 60 00:02:37,761 --> 00:02:39,841 Speaker 1: to watch something together because I just had nothing left. 61 00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:42,001 Speaker 1: So I just watched some nice things on YouTube together. 62 00:02:42,041 --> 00:02:44,321 Speaker 1: But I had no energy to play with them. And 63 00:02:44,361 --> 00:02:46,401 Speaker 1: sometimes you do you just need to actually lay your 64 00:02:46,401 --> 00:02:47,401 Speaker 1: body down and do nothing. 65 00:02:47,481 --> 00:02:48,801 Speaker 4: You just need to veg out sometimes. 66 00:02:49,240 --> 00:02:51,441 Speaker 3: And now the fact that you actually schedule it in, 67 00:02:51,601 --> 00:02:53,240 Speaker 3: if it's not on the calendar, you fill it in 68 00:02:53,520 --> 00:02:55,641 Speaker 3: exactly by putting it on the calendar, It's like, Ooh, 69 00:02:55,721 --> 00:02:57,841 Speaker 3: I actually have to hold myself accountable and I need 70 00:02:57,881 --> 00:02:58,401 Speaker 3: to create the. 71 00:02:58,401 --> 00:02:59,001 Speaker 1: Space for this. 72 00:02:59,121 --> 00:03:01,441 Speaker 4: It's even like friend time, Like if you don't schedule 73 00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:03,041 Speaker 4: into the calendar, you're not going to make time for it, 74 00:03:03,161 --> 00:03:04,921 Speaker 4: and then you know you'll see somebody in three months 75 00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:07,240 Speaker 4: and go, well, we didn't make time to see each other. 76 00:03:07,361 --> 00:03:08,921 Speaker 4: So it's like when you can schedule things in and 77 00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:11,081 Speaker 4: make it as important as like a work task or 78 00:03:11,121 --> 00:03:14,881 Speaker 4: training or like sleeping or eating, then it's like you 79 00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:16,561 Speaker 4: just get to implement it so much more beautifully. 80 00:03:16,721 --> 00:03:19,801 Speaker 1: So true. Now, when we were discussing what topics we 81 00:03:19,881 --> 00:03:21,921 Speaker 1: wanted to talk to you about, there was just so 82 00:03:22,121 --> 00:03:24,441 Speaker 1: many and we're lucky we've got you for two episodes, 83 00:03:24,481 --> 00:03:26,761 Speaker 1: so stay tuned for today's. We've also got you for Wednesday. 84 00:03:27,161 --> 00:03:30,641 Speaker 1: But today we wanted to talk all things in securities. Yeah, 85 00:03:30,680 --> 00:03:33,240 Speaker 1: because we are women and we all have insecurities. I 86 00:03:33,281 --> 00:03:35,641 Speaker 1: think everyone has insecurities and it's something so many of 87 00:03:35,721 --> 00:03:38,161 Speaker 1: us struggle with day to day, and some more than others, 88 00:03:38,201 --> 00:03:41,041 Speaker 1: but they still do just arise. So this is something 89 00:03:41,081 --> 00:03:43,201 Speaker 1: I'm assuming a lot of your clients come to you 90 00:03:43,241 --> 00:03:46,880 Speaker 1: with insecurities within their bodies, within their relationships, their friendships, 91 00:03:46,961 --> 00:03:48,801 Speaker 1: their work, Like is it a bit. 92 00:03:48,641 --> 00:03:51,121 Speaker 4: Of everything, yes, So insecurities. I think this is a 93 00:03:51,201 --> 00:03:53,881 Speaker 4: huge topic, especially for women, like where do we ever 94 00:03:53,921 --> 00:03:56,081 Speaker 4: really have a space where we can talk about insecurities 95 00:03:56,081 --> 00:03:58,441 Speaker 4: without feeling shame about it? And so I think this 96 00:03:58,481 --> 00:04:00,921 Speaker 4: is going to be really powerful, And I can't promise 97 00:04:00,961 --> 00:04:02,841 Speaker 4: that after having this conversation, you're not going to be 98 00:04:03,161 --> 00:04:06,081 Speaker 4: like obsessed with this work and actually seeing insecurities in 99 00:04:06,121 --> 00:04:08,121 Speaker 4: a really positive light. So I'm really excited for that. 100 00:04:08,521 --> 00:04:09,481 Speaker 4: Oh so cool. 101 00:04:09,521 --> 00:04:12,561 Speaker 1: And the women that come to you, are they normally 102 00:04:12,561 --> 00:04:16,241 Speaker 1: fixated on like one particular insecurity, like I'm insecure about 103 00:04:16,281 --> 00:04:18,721 Speaker 1: my salu light, or I'm insecure in my relationship, like 104 00:04:18,761 --> 00:04:20,601 Speaker 1: I can't, you know, let my partner go out and 105 00:04:20,641 --> 00:04:22,281 Speaker 1: do things that normally one thing or do you find 106 00:04:22,281 --> 00:04:24,721 Speaker 1: that insecure people have like multiple that you're working on. 107 00:04:25,001 --> 00:04:27,561 Speaker 4: I would say it's more of like a core consensus. 108 00:04:27,561 --> 00:04:29,841 Speaker 4: It's like a core energy. It's like either I'm not 109 00:04:29,880 --> 00:04:32,601 Speaker 4: smart enough, I'm not capable enough, or I'm not beautiful enough. 110 00:04:32,641 --> 00:04:35,321 Speaker 4: Those are like the three main ones. And so I 111 00:04:35,481 --> 00:04:37,440 Speaker 4: usually see within my clients, and you know, every single 112 00:04:37,481 --> 00:04:40,641 Speaker 4: woman that walks through the door has some aspect of 113 00:04:40,681 --> 00:04:42,760 Speaker 4: this where it's like, Okay, I don't feel capable enough. 114 00:04:42,761 --> 00:04:45,281 Speaker 4: That then shows up in their business in their careers, 115 00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:48,121 Speaker 4: in the opportunities that they allow themselves to go after, 116 00:04:48,561 --> 00:04:51,601 Speaker 4: and then I'm not beautiful enough shows up in comparison. 117 00:04:51,601 --> 00:04:54,921 Speaker 4: They're comparing themselves to their friends people on social media, 118 00:04:55,121 --> 00:04:58,121 Speaker 4: like it just every single one. It kind of stems down, 119 00:04:58,121 --> 00:05:00,721 Speaker 4: but it has like this overall arch of like impacting 120 00:05:00,841 --> 00:05:03,001 Speaker 4: every single thing that they do in their life because 121 00:05:03,401 --> 00:05:06,801 Speaker 4: the insecurity is like con uming them and kind of 122 00:05:06,921 --> 00:05:10,561 Speaker 4: putting like this like rose colored glasses on themselves so 123 00:05:10,601 --> 00:05:13,641 Speaker 4: that they're not seeing themselves clearly, and so it impacts 124 00:05:13,681 --> 00:05:16,840 Speaker 4: their ability to show up their self esteem, their self image. 125 00:05:16,841 --> 00:05:19,441 Speaker 4: They're not seeing themselves for all of who they are. 126 00:05:19,481 --> 00:05:23,801 Speaker 4: They're only seeing themselves for the insecurity that they're consumed by. 127 00:05:24,281 --> 00:05:26,481 Speaker 1: Right, And I love that you're a self worth coach. 128 00:05:26,561 --> 00:05:28,801 Speaker 1: I'm assuming like we all have insecurities, but women that 129 00:05:28,841 --> 00:05:31,640 Speaker 1: have a strong sense of self worth, the insecurities wouldn't 130 00:05:31,681 --> 00:05:33,441 Speaker 1: take over to a lot of impact all those things 131 00:05:33,481 --> 00:05:35,281 Speaker 1: in their life. But if you don't have much self worth, 132 00:05:35,601 --> 00:05:37,840 Speaker 1: I'm guessing it would really take over and impact it. 133 00:05:37,841 --> 00:05:40,720 Speaker 4: It does, it really does, especially with women. Like women 134 00:05:40,801 --> 00:05:43,121 Speaker 4: aren't prone to be like go and be your most 135 00:05:43,201 --> 00:05:45,241 Speaker 4: confident self. You know what I mean, like go and 136 00:05:45,281 --> 00:05:48,041 Speaker 4: be bold about it, be loud, be self expressed, Like 137 00:05:48,161 --> 00:05:50,921 Speaker 4: women aren't taught to like go and own that about themselves. 138 00:05:50,921 --> 00:05:56,400 Speaker 4: And so women are very like composed the nice girl, soft, gentle, 139 00:05:56,681 --> 00:06:01,080 Speaker 4: quiet reserved into this little like perfectly packaged box you 140 00:06:01,121 --> 00:06:04,241 Speaker 4: know that is leasd with insecurity. Yeah, you know, And 141 00:06:04,281 --> 00:06:08,401 Speaker 4: where does it all stem from? Insecurity? So it's a 142 00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:10,521 Speaker 4: really interesting thing. So I believe that there are different 143 00:06:10,561 --> 00:06:13,880 Speaker 4: facets of insecurity. So like essentially it's a manifestation of 144 00:06:13,961 --> 00:06:18,640 Speaker 4: like insecurity is a wound, and it manifests into like shame, 145 00:06:18,841 --> 00:06:23,121 Speaker 4: self doubt, negative image in a critic negative internal dialogue, 146 00:06:23,361 --> 00:06:26,521 Speaker 4: and it stems from I believe three places, so one 147 00:06:26,641 --> 00:06:32,241 Speaker 4: being past experiences, one being generational and societal pressures yeah yeah, 148 00:06:32,281 --> 00:06:35,880 Speaker 4: so social conditioning yeah, and like expectations and standards. So 149 00:06:36,401 --> 00:06:39,481 Speaker 4: I believe that like our most core wounds, because insecurity 150 00:06:39,481 --> 00:06:42,161 Speaker 4: is a wound. Right, So like every time you're experiencing something, 151 00:06:42,201 --> 00:06:44,441 Speaker 4: you know, say you're with your girlfriends, you're getting ready 152 00:06:44,440 --> 00:06:46,961 Speaker 4: for dinner and you go to take a photo, and 153 00:06:47,201 --> 00:06:48,960 Speaker 4: all of a sudden you're looking at the photo and 154 00:06:48,961 --> 00:06:52,041 Speaker 4: you're picking yourself apart, right, that wound is then being 155 00:06:52,081 --> 00:06:55,041 Speaker 4: activated in that moment from you know, a past experience 156 00:06:55,081 --> 00:06:57,601 Speaker 4: that you've had where someone maybe made fun of you 157 00:06:57,641 --> 00:07:00,121 Speaker 4: in primary school for the way that you look or 158 00:07:00,161 --> 00:07:02,001 Speaker 4: the way that your hair sits, or the way that 159 00:07:02,041 --> 00:07:04,961 Speaker 4: you speak. And so it can be a manifestation of 160 00:07:05,320 --> 00:07:07,640 Speaker 4: that of like a past experience with like what I 161 00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:10,481 Speaker 4: just explained, or it can even be generational. So like, 162 00:07:10,601 --> 00:07:13,121 Speaker 4: let's say, for an example, you have like a parent 163 00:07:13,241 --> 00:07:17,161 Speaker 4: or a guardian who is really anxious, and they're very 164 00:07:17,201 --> 00:07:20,841 Speaker 4: anxious in social settings. You might then witness that behavior 165 00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:24,081 Speaker 4: and then mimic that behavior and adopt that right, just 166 00:07:24,161 --> 00:07:26,721 Speaker 4: like what they did, right, because we are such sponges, 167 00:07:26,801 --> 00:07:29,601 Speaker 4: especially at such a young age, that we then adopt 168 00:07:29,641 --> 00:07:33,241 Speaker 4: those behaviors. And then in terms of like societal pressures, 169 00:07:33,241 --> 00:07:34,521 Speaker 4: it's like all you have to do is look at 170 00:07:34,561 --> 00:07:38,641 Speaker 4: the beauty standards, look at Instagram, social media, what people 171 00:07:38,721 --> 00:07:42,321 Speaker 4: in groups are like clinging to in terms of what's accepted, 172 00:07:42,441 --> 00:07:45,321 Speaker 4: what's trending, Yeah, what's accepted, what everyone's doing. You know, 173 00:07:45,561 --> 00:07:47,361 Speaker 4: even like I don't know if you guys have seen this, 174 00:07:47,401 --> 00:07:50,041 Speaker 4: but you know, like the Angelina Jolie kind of trend 175 00:07:50,201 --> 00:07:52,761 Speaker 4: where it was like she was like the pinnacle of 176 00:07:52,841 --> 00:07:54,961 Speaker 4: like that look, and now I feel like everyone has 177 00:07:55,481 --> 00:07:57,481 Speaker 4: kind of gone down that beauty route of like this 178 00:07:57,601 --> 00:07:59,721 Speaker 4: is what's accepted. Yeah, I don't know if you guys 179 00:07:59,721 --> 00:08:00,121 Speaker 4: have seen that. 180 00:08:00,201 --> 00:08:01,801 Speaker 1: No, I'm not you mean yeah, yeah. 181 00:08:01,841 --> 00:08:04,481 Speaker 4: So it's like, you know, following what everybody else is 182 00:08:04,521 --> 00:08:06,561 Speaker 4: doing and then going Okay, if I'm not doing that, 183 00:08:06,601 --> 00:08:08,321 Speaker 4: then I'm not going to be accepted or I'm not 184 00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:11,241 Speaker 4: going to be loved or valued as much as the 185 00:08:11,241 --> 00:08:12,561 Speaker 4: people who are doing those things. 186 00:08:13,081 --> 00:08:15,121 Speaker 1: So if the client comes to you and says that, like, oh, 187 00:08:15,201 --> 00:08:17,281 Speaker 1: I just can't get any photos, like I pick myself 188 00:08:17,321 --> 00:08:18,521 Speaker 1: a part of the time. I hate what to see 189 00:08:18,561 --> 00:08:21,041 Speaker 1: in the mirror. What kind of process, Like obviously you 190 00:08:21,081 --> 00:08:23,001 Speaker 1: do life coaching, what kind of process do you take 191 00:08:23,001 --> 00:08:24,041 Speaker 1: them through in a session? 192 00:08:24,361 --> 00:08:26,761 Speaker 4: They never love this, They hate me when I do this. 193 00:08:27,641 --> 00:08:29,161 Speaker 4: But the first thing that I ask them is are 194 00:08:29,201 --> 00:08:30,001 Speaker 4: you using filters? 195 00:08:30,441 --> 00:08:31,041 Speaker 1: Oh? Wow? 196 00:08:31,161 --> 00:08:34,241 Speaker 4: Are you using filters? Are you editing your photos? And 197 00:08:34,841 --> 00:08:37,521 Speaker 4: where are you like face tuning? So, like this is 198 00:08:37,561 --> 00:08:41,161 Speaker 4: a huge thing because especially like in our generation as well, 199 00:08:41,601 --> 00:08:45,041 Speaker 4: they are so conditioned to comparing themselves to those filters. 200 00:08:45,161 --> 00:08:47,361 Speaker 4: And what it does is it immediately triggers the insecurity 201 00:08:47,401 --> 00:08:49,641 Speaker 4: in that moment, right, And so the first thing that 202 00:08:49,721 --> 00:08:51,241 Speaker 4: I get them to look at is, Okay, where are 203 00:08:51,281 --> 00:08:53,961 Speaker 4: you doing these things? Because it's perpetuating how you're feeling 204 00:08:53,961 --> 00:08:56,681 Speaker 4: about yourself and it's only going to increase the level 205 00:08:56,721 --> 00:08:59,761 Speaker 4: of like negative internal dialogue that you have about yourself. 206 00:09:00,161 --> 00:09:02,361 Speaker 4: And so the first step of that is go, Okay, 207 00:09:02,441 --> 00:09:04,641 Speaker 4: are you doing this? Yes or no? Then they let 208 00:09:04,641 --> 00:09:06,201 Speaker 4: me know and then they're like, oh, I know where 209 00:09:06,201 --> 00:09:08,241 Speaker 4: this is going. And I make them go cold turkey 210 00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:12,641 Speaker 4: on those things. And so it's about removing the editing apps, 211 00:09:12,881 --> 00:09:16,921 Speaker 4: not using any filters, only taking photos with the normal 212 00:09:16,961 --> 00:09:19,841 Speaker 4: facing camera because what it does is it allows their 213 00:09:19,881 --> 00:09:23,041 Speaker 4: perspective of themselves to readjust to the way that they 214 00:09:23,121 --> 00:09:24,481 Speaker 4: actually look in real life. 215 00:09:24,601 --> 00:09:26,201 Speaker 1: And what if they're not using them, What. 216 00:09:26,161 --> 00:09:29,041 Speaker 4: If they're not using them and they are faced with 217 00:09:29,081 --> 00:09:30,961 Speaker 4: insecurity about the way that they look. Yes, the first 218 00:09:30,961 --> 00:09:32,401 Speaker 4: thing that I get them to do is actually just 219 00:09:32,441 --> 00:09:33,681 Speaker 4: stare at themselves in the mirror. 220 00:09:33,721 --> 00:09:34,281 Speaker 3: Mirror work. 221 00:09:34,401 --> 00:09:37,801 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, mirror work. So just looking at themselves, not 222 00:09:37,881 --> 00:09:42,001 Speaker 4: needing to do anything necessarily, but just recognize themselves in 223 00:09:42,041 --> 00:09:44,521 Speaker 4: the mirror and then allow the judgments to come up right, 224 00:09:44,601 --> 00:09:47,761 Speaker 4: because it's like what happens is people Let's say, for example, 225 00:09:47,761 --> 00:09:49,161 Speaker 4: you know you put a little bit of weight on, 226 00:09:49,241 --> 00:09:50,521 Speaker 4: you're not happy with the way that you look, or 227 00:09:50,561 --> 00:09:52,601 Speaker 4: like you don't like your facial features. You look at 228 00:09:52,641 --> 00:09:54,001 Speaker 4: yourself in the mirror, and the first thing you want 229 00:09:54,041 --> 00:09:55,881 Speaker 4: to do is you want to run away from it. Yeah, 230 00:09:55,921 --> 00:09:57,281 Speaker 4: And you want to go, oh, nope, I don't want 231 00:09:57,281 --> 00:09:59,921 Speaker 4: to look here. This doesn't run away put your makeup 232 00:09:59,961 --> 00:10:03,001 Speaker 4: on or adjusting something. Yeah, And it's like I don't 233 00:10:03,041 --> 00:10:06,441 Speaker 4: want to face this discomfort. So it becomes about facing 234 00:10:06,441 --> 00:10:09,601 Speaker 4: the discomfort and going I can sit with this and 235 00:10:09,721 --> 00:10:11,761 Speaker 4: letting all of the judgments come up, because it's almost 236 00:10:11,761 --> 00:10:13,721 Speaker 4: like a brain dump brea. It's like, you know when 237 00:10:13,721 --> 00:10:15,441 Speaker 4: you write out things on paper, it's like you need 238 00:10:15,481 --> 00:10:17,401 Speaker 4: to get all of the self judgments out so that 239 00:10:17,441 --> 00:10:19,081 Speaker 4: you can brain dump it out, get it out of 240 00:10:19,121 --> 00:10:21,761 Speaker 4: your head, and then go, Okay, how can I now 241 00:10:21,841 --> 00:10:25,961 Speaker 4: cultivate a relationship with myself, which essentially looks like bringing 242 00:10:26,001 --> 00:10:28,961 Speaker 4: forward all of those judgments, facing the discomfort of that, 243 00:10:29,081 --> 00:10:31,321 Speaker 4: and then going okay, how can I walk past this 244 00:10:31,361 --> 00:10:33,801 Speaker 4: mirror every single day and pick something about myself that 245 00:10:33,841 --> 00:10:37,121 Speaker 4: I actually like, that's beautiful something about myself that I 246 00:10:37,161 --> 00:10:40,121 Speaker 4: actually appreciate. You don't need to immediately go straight to 247 00:10:40,161 --> 00:10:43,401 Speaker 4: self love, like that's an unrealistic expectation for somebody who's 248 00:10:43,441 --> 00:10:46,321 Speaker 4: struggled with self love for so long. All you need 249 00:10:46,361 --> 00:10:49,881 Speaker 4: to do is have compassion, Yes, Like start with compassion 250 00:10:50,321 --> 00:10:52,841 Speaker 4: and just go Okay, maybe wow, I like the way 251 00:10:52,841 --> 00:10:55,481 Speaker 4: that my hair's sitting today, or wow, that top is 252 00:10:55,561 --> 00:10:56,681 Speaker 4: really cute today. 253 00:10:56,521 --> 00:10:58,241 Speaker 1: I've got interesting like cool color eyes. 254 00:10:58,441 --> 00:11:00,921 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, things about yourself. You're like, oh wow, that's 255 00:11:00,921 --> 00:11:04,241 Speaker 4: really quirky. And you know, maybe I would have previously 256 00:11:04,281 --> 00:11:06,441 Speaker 4: thought that people to judge me for that, but I 257 00:11:06,441 --> 00:11:09,281 Speaker 4: actually find it really interesting about myself. You know those 258 00:11:09,321 --> 00:11:11,441 Speaker 4: things where you're like, oh, will people judge me for this? 259 00:11:11,561 --> 00:11:13,921 Speaker 4: But it's like, no, that's actually what makes me unique. 260 00:11:14,001 --> 00:11:15,961 Speaker 1: This is what I love about life. Coaches too, is 261 00:11:16,001 --> 00:11:19,161 Speaker 1: it's like a lot of the time when we feel discomfort, 262 00:11:19,521 --> 00:11:21,801 Speaker 1: we do run because there's no one holding us accountable. 263 00:11:21,841 --> 00:11:23,361 Speaker 1: No one else knows what you're going through. You can 264 00:11:23,361 --> 00:11:24,601 Speaker 1: park it to the side and no one else is 265 00:11:24,601 --> 00:11:26,161 Speaker 1: going to know anything. You can put on your mask, 266 00:11:26,361 --> 00:11:28,641 Speaker 1: pretend you're cool and everything's all good, but then you 267 00:11:28,681 --> 00:11:30,441 Speaker 1: have to be faced with that again. Whereas when you've 268 00:11:30,441 --> 00:11:33,201 Speaker 1: got someone like yourself taking you through that work, holding 269 00:11:33,201 --> 00:11:36,321 Speaker 1: your accountable and helping you move through it. Yeah, you're 270 00:11:36,361 --> 00:11:40,161 Speaker 1: taking a step to a new better you. It's really cool, 271 00:11:40,241 --> 00:11:40,681 Speaker 1: so true. 272 00:11:40,721 --> 00:11:44,241 Speaker 4: Yeah, and it's so interesting. You mentioned something before about makeup. Yeah, 273 00:11:44,281 --> 00:11:45,761 Speaker 4: and there are so many ways that we can like 274 00:11:45,841 --> 00:11:48,361 Speaker 4: hide our insecurities. Yeah, and it works the way that 275 00:11:48,361 --> 00:11:51,481 Speaker 4: I would imagine like addiction works, Like when you continue 276 00:11:51,521 --> 00:11:53,521 Speaker 4: to have the addiction of whatever it is, you need 277 00:11:53,561 --> 00:11:56,721 Speaker 4: more of that thing to get that need met right, 278 00:11:57,081 --> 00:12:00,001 Speaker 4: And so with insecurities. And for me in my personal experience, 279 00:12:00,401 --> 00:12:02,521 Speaker 4: I used to have this like deep core wound of 280 00:12:02,561 --> 00:12:05,281 Speaker 4: like unworthiness, which is originally why I started doing love 281 00:12:05,361 --> 00:12:07,641 Speaker 4: coaching in the first place, because that was my wound 282 00:12:07,641 --> 00:12:09,361 Speaker 4: to work on, which is why I'm able to help 283 00:12:09,361 --> 00:12:11,561 Speaker 4: women now, which is so good. And I used to 284 00:12:11,601 --> 00:12:14,001 Speaker 4: have this yet core wound of unworthiness. And what I 285 00:12:14,041 --> 00:12:17,361 Speaker 4: would do is whenever I was feeling like bad about myself, 286 00:12:17,361 --> 00:12:20,201 Speaker 4: where I noticed something get triggered within me, the first 287 00:12:20,201 --> 00:12:21,841 Speaker 4: thing that I would do would go put on a 288 00:12:21,841 --> 00:12:24,401 Speaker 4: cute outfit, get ready, put makeup on, and I would 289 00:12:24,401 --> 00:12:27,401 Speaker 4: go somewhere that was really busy, somewhere that was really busy, 290 00:12:27,441 --> 00:12:29,161 Speaker 4: where I would get validation for the way that I 291 00:12:29,201 --> 00:12:33,041 Speaker 4: look because I would notice people looking at me, or 292 00:12:33,081 --> 00:12:34,961 Speaker 4: I'd be like, you know, I can see that person 293 00:12:34,961 --> 00:12:36,481 Speaker 4: in the corner of their eyes staring at me. And 294 00:12:36,481 --> 00:12:38,761 Speaker 4: because I lacked that within myself and I didn't know 295 00:12:38,801 --> 00:12:41,241 Speaker 4: how to be that source of validation for myself, I 296 00:12:41,321 --> 00:12:44,161 Speaker 4: had to seek it in the external world. And that's 297 00:12:44,161 --> 00:12:46,921 Speaker 4: how it manifested for me. And I didn't realize until 298 00:12:46,921 --> 00:12:49,281 Speaker 4: I had to consciously bring that into my awareness of like, 299 00:12:49,761 --> 00:12:52,801 Speaker 4: this is like one of those moments for me, And 300 00:12:52,841 --> 00:12:56,441 Speaker 4: so I was constantly seeking validation in the external It's 301 00:12:56,481 --> 00:12:58,921 Speaker 4: so interesting to understand how it kind of manifests in 302 00:12:58,961 --> 00:13:02,241 Speaker 4: real life. You have to then do more of it 303 00:13:02,561 --> 00:13:06,961 Speaker 4: to continue to suppress the wound, right because like with insecurities, 304 00:13:07,521 --> 00:13:09,921 Speaker 4: every single time that you lean towards something, let's say 305 00:13:10,001 --> 00:13:14,361 Speaker 4: like filler, botox, makeup, getting ready, whatever it is, and 306 00:13:14,401 --> 00:13:18,201 Speaker 4: you're not addressing the core insecurity, you then create that 307 00:13:18,241 --> 00:13:20,841 Speaker 4: wound bigger. What was once the size of a golf 308 00:13:20,841 --> 00:13:24,801 Speaker 4: ball becomes like a crater like wound, and insecurity within 309 00:13:24,841 --> 00:13:28,161 Speaker 4: you that continues to grow because you're looking for the 310 00:13:28,161 --> 00:13:31,121 Speaker 4: band aid solution. That's like putting a band aid on 311 00:13:31,201 --> 00:13:35,001 Speaker 4: a gushing wound, right, it doesn't actually do anything. It 312 00:13:35,001 --> 00:13:39,081 Speaker 4: does temporarily because it provides like temporary relief, but it 313 00:13:39,081 --> 00:13:41,561 Speaker 4: doesn't do anything for the long time. And this is 314 00:13:41,561 --> 00:13:44,521 Speaker 4: the misconception about self worth. Everyone's always like, you know, 315 00:13:44,721 --> 00:13:46,561 Speaker 4: looking for the quick fix and things like that, but 316 00:13:46,641 --> 00:13:49,281 Speaker 4: nothing that's going to sustain for the long term. Like 317 00:13:49,441 --> 00:13:52,281 Speaker 4: we want like the slow burn, right, but we're so 318 00:13:52,321 --> 00:13:57,801 Speaker 4: addicted to like instant gratification and exactly, and like you know, 319 00:13:57,841 --> 00:14:00,161 Speaker 4: having those things accessible to you immediately, and you know, 320 00:14:00,601 --> 00:14:02,081 Speaker 4: naturally we're going to go, oh, yes, I want the 321 00:14:02,081 --> 00:14:03,961 Speaker 4: relief right now. I don't want to feel insecure. I 322 00:14:04,001 --> 00:14:05,641 Speaker 4: don't want to feel like I feel worthy. I don't 323 00:14:05,641 --> 00:14:07,281 Speaker 4: want to look at the fact that I'm comparing myself 324 00:14:07,281 --> 00:14:09,361 Speaker 4: to her, Like all of these things come up and 325 00:14:09,401 --> 00:14:12,801 Speaker 4: it's challenging to look at, but it's so freeing as well, 326 00:14:12,841 --> 00:14:15,401 Speaker 4: because on the contrary to what I just said, every 327 00:14:15,441 --> 00:14:17,481 Speaker 4: time that you look at an insecurity and choose to 328 00:14:17,521 --> 00:14:21,001 Speaker 4: face it, you then shrink that wound. That's beautiful. 329 00:14:21,081 --> 00:14:23,281 Speaker 1: I love that you shaid that story too, of getting 330 00:14:23,321 --> 00:14:26,241 Speaker 1: dressed up and going outside validation. I was saying wow, wow, wow, 331 00:14:26,281 --> 00:14:28,321 Speaker 1: because I think so many women will be going wow. 332 00:14:28,361 --> 00:14:29,961 Speaker 1: That was me and it just reminded me when I 333 00:14:30,001 --> 00:14:31,801 Speaker 1: was younger and as soon as I can get my 334 00:14:31,801 --> 00:14:34,001 Speaker 1: boobs done, I wanted to have done because I felt 335 00:14:34,001 --> 00:14:35,841 Speaker 1: like I was just always the ugliest out of my friends. 336 00:14:35,841 --> 00:14:37,681 Speaker 1: So I got the biggest breast and plants that they 337 00:14:37,721 --> 00:14:40,121 Speaker 1: would possibly put in there, and all of a sudden 338 00:14:40,121 --> 00:14:42,401 Speaker 1: I started getting attention from men. Yeah, So I was like, 339 00:14:42,521 --> 00:14:44,641 Speaker 1: I am hot, I am fitting in. I am now 340 00:14:44,641 --> 00:14:46,761 Speaker 1: winning bikini competitions like I used to enter it. There's 341 00:14:46,761 --> 00:14:48,721 Speaker 1: more than competitions. And I used to wear like big 342 00:14:48,761 --> 00:14:53,001 Speaker 1: black smoky eyes, like you remember those Napoleon foundation sticks. Yeah, 343 00:14:53,121 --> 00:14:56,281 Speaker 1: sick found. Yes, It's like the more makeup I wear, 344 00:14:56,361 --> 00:14:58,881 Speaker 1: the more exhair extensions I have. Like everything was just 345 00:14:59,001 --> 00:15:02,321 Speaker 1: laid upon layer because I thought the more I have on, 346 00:15:02,641 --> 00:15:04,481 Speaker 1: the more done up I look, the more love I 347 00:15:04,521 --> 00:15:06,681 Speaker 1: will get. Yeah, And it's so cool now to be 348 00:15:06,721 --> 00:15:09,081 Speaker 1: at a stage rum even like considering removing my implants, 349 00:15:09,081 --> 00:15:11,001 Speaker 1: like I just don't need that to feel love. But 350 00:15:11,521 --> 00:15:13,241 Speaker 1: you can have compassion from where you're at and I 351 00:15:13,241 --> 00:15:14,961 Speaker 1: just think so many women will relate to that. 352 00:15:15,121 --> 00:15:17,161 Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah. We we even talking about this the other day 353 00:15:17,161 --> 00:15:21,841 Speaker 4: about how like who you are internally doesn't match the 354 00:15:21,881 --> 00:15:24,201 Speaker 4: external anymore. Yeah. So it's like at one point that 355 00:15:24,361 --> 00:15:26,201 Speaker 4: was what you wanted because you're like, oh, it's feeling 356 00:15:26,241 --> 00:15:29,721 Speaker 4: a void almost of like I'm hot, like all these things, 357 00:15:29,961 --> 00:15:31,801 Speaker 4: you get that validation mat and then when you grow 358 00:15:31,841 --> 00:15:35,321 Speaker 4: and evolve and you do this work, you then shift 359 00:15:35,361 --> 00:15:37,761 Speaker 4: and change the way that you feel inside, so you 360 00:15:37,841 --> 00:15:40,401 Speaker 4: no longer want the same level of attention that you 361 00:15:40,401 --> 00:15:42,921 Speaker 4: were getting coming from a place of I need validation 362 00:15:42,961 --> 00:15:43,721 Speaker 4: from its past. 363 00:15:43,641 --> 00:15:45,441 Speaker 1: So different and just on the topic of I don't 364 00:15:45,481 --> 00:15:47,441 Speaker 1: know why breast implants comes to me, but it does 365 00:15:47,481 --> 00:15:49,521 Speaker 1: because now I'm nearly up to my ten years of 366 00:15:49,561 --> 00:15:51,441 Speaker 1: needing to get them done anyway, and I would probably 367 00:15:51,481 --> 00:15:53,721 Speaker 1: get them like maybe smaller. But it's not from a 368 00:15:53,761 --> 00:15:56,161 Speaker 1: place of like I hate myself or I need validation. 369 00:15:56,241 --> 00:15:58,241 Speaker 1: It's like I do love boobs, but it comes from 370 00:15:58,281 --> 00:16:01,161 Speaker 1: such a different energy. I love the makeup thing too, 371 00:16:01,241 --> 00:16:03,161 Speaker 1: because I found for a while and I had really 372 00:16:03,201 --> 00:16:04,801 Speaker 1: bad skin, I was trying to cover up all the 373 00:16:04,841 --> 00:16:07,641 Speaker 1: time that once my skin cleared up. I challenged myself. 374 00:16:07,721 --> 00:16:09,921 Speaker 1: Obviously having clear skinn it help, but I challenge myself 375 00:16:09,921 --> 00:16:12,441 Speaker 1: to not wear makeup every day and still look in 376 00:16:12,481 --> 00:16:14,681 Speaker 1: the mirror and love who I was. And it was 377 00:16:14,681 --> 00:16:16,641 Speaker 1: a really good exercise to do because I was like, 378 00:16:16,801 --> 00:16:19,401 Speaker 1: I still love myself just as much. And my hair 379 00:16:19,641 --> 00:16:21,921 Speaker 1: went through that last year. I had this thing in 380 00:16:21,921 --> 00:16:24,041 Speaker 1: my head that like, the longer my hair is more beautiful, 381 00:16:24,041 --> 00:16:26,721 Speaker 1: I'll be more feminine. I will be And then when 382 00:16:26,761 --> 00:16:28,921 Speaker 1: I cut it all off, I was like, You're still 383 00:16:28,961 --> 00:16:31,401 Speaker 1: just as cool. You're still just as bad ass, like 384 00:16:31,641 --> 00:16:33,561 Speaker 1: your friends and Steve and everyone else is going to 385 00:16:33,601 --> 00:16:35,641 Speaker 1: love you just as much. Your hair does not mean 386 00:16:35,721 --> 00:16:37,761 Speaker 1: jack shit. And it was so cool to go through 387 00:16:37,761 --> 00:16:40,161 Speaker 1: that process of like this doesn't mean anything. 388 00:16:40,241 --> 00:16:40,481 Speaker 4: You know. 389 00:16:40,721 --> 00:16:43,921 Speaker 3: When I started going through my healing journey, I stripped everything. 390 00:16:44,281 --> 00:16:47,521 Speaker 3: I stopped fake tanning, I stopped getting eyelash extensions. I 391 00:16:47,521 --> 00:16:50,081 Speaker 3: took all my hair extensions out for a solid two years. 392 00:16:50,081 --> 00:16:51,961 Speaker 3: I've just gotten them back now. But I'm getting it 393 00:16:51,961 --> 00:16:55,681 Speaker 3: because I want to. It's not because I was hiding beforehand, 394 00:16:55,761 --> 00:16:57,761 Speaker 3: but I shed all of it for two years. I 395 00:16:57,801 --> 00:17:00,161 Speaker 3: was just like, nah, like I just want to get 396 00:17:00,201 --> 00:17:03,761 Speaker 3: back to Kire, back to Kiara, like who is she? 397 00:17:03,761 --> 00:17:04,161 Speaker 3: She need? 398 00:17:05,161 --> 00:17:06,960 Speaker 4: Like that? Who is she? What does she need? I 399 00:17:07,001 --> 00:17:08,761 Speaker 4: love that? And how did you feel in that moment 400 00:17:08,801 --> 00:17:10,840 Speaker 4: when you naked naked? 401 00:17:10,961 --> 00:17:14,400 Speaker 3: When I first took my hair extensions out, I felt 402 00:17:15,241 --> 00:17:17,521 Speaker 3: I did everything I didn know Tan for ages too, 403 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:21,521 Speaker 3: like I did the whole Yeah, and I felt really exposed, 404 00:17:22,080 --> 00:17:24,200 Speaker 3: but in the best possible way, because I felt like 405 00:17:24,241 --> 00:17:26,801 Speaker 3: I was ready to expose who ready to strip it 406 00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:29,001 Speaker 3: all down? I was ready to rip it all down. 407 00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:31,400 Speaker 1: And now we look back like we were just watching 408 00:17:31,441 --> 00:17:33,521 Speaker 1: videos of Kiara and I are like probaly six years 409 00:17:33,521 --> 00:17:37,521 Speaker 1: ago our eyelashes. How do we even see eyes opened? 410 00:17:37,681 --> 00:17:41,281 Speaker 1: How did they open lash extensions for so long? I'm like, what. 411 00:17:43,400 --> 00:17:45,960 Speaker 4: Are you talking about? Strip on lashes or false lash there? False? 412 00:17:46,001 --> 00:17:48,961 Speaker 3: Like send them? 413 00:17:49,321 --> 00:17:52,441 Speaker 4: Yeah, I have, And I remember having the biggest insecurity 414 00:17:52,640 --> 00:17:54,761 Speaker 4: when I would take them off. I would literally say 415 00:17:54,761 --> 00:17:56,961 Speaker 4: to myself like I look like a boy. I look 416 00:17:57,041 --> 00:17:59,081 Speaker 4: like a boy. And I felt so bare, so naked 417 00:17:59,160 --> 00:18:02,600 Speaker 4: without them because I adjusted my lens of myself had 418 00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:05,321 Speaker 4: adjusted to me having lashes that whenever I didn't of them, 419 00:18:05,360 --> 00:18:08,201 Speaker 4: it was like boom insecurity and it's just same thing, 420 00:18:08,360 --> 00:18:10,801 Speaker 4: nails ten hair, hair color. 421 00:18:10,561 --> 00:18:13,000 Speaker 1: Even like I thought the blonde are the better. I 422 00:18:13,041 --> 00:18:15,641 Speaker 1: just wanted to stand out and be loved. And at 423 00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:17,401 Speaker 1: one point I must have been so praised for being 424 00:18:17,441 --> 00:18:19,600 Speaker 1: the blonde head barbie with big boobs and got attention 425 00:18:19,721 --> 00:18:21,841 Speaker 1: of that that I clung onto that. And now it's 426 00:18:21,880 --> 00:18:25,241 Speaker 1: like done a full one eight. Hey, let's go further 427 00:18:25,281 --> 00:18:31,281 Speaker 1: on the chat around this topic. Talk to me hair color, botox, fillers, surgery, Like, 428 00:18:31,321 --> 00:18:32,960 Speaker 1: I'm not against it. I think everyone does what they 429 00:18:33,001 --> 00:18:35,720 Speaker 1: need to do to feel good, but I'd love for 430 00:18:35,761 --> 00:18:37,360 Speaker 1: you to just unpack it a little bit more of the 431 00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:39,480 Speaker 1: different places that's come from. If it's coming from a 432 00:18:39,481 --> 00:18:42,681 Speaker 1: place of I hate myself compared to like I'm consciously 433 00:18:42,721 --> 00:18:45,481 Speaker 1: deciding to do this because of XYZ. Like, do you 434 00:18:45,481 --> 00:18:47,360 Speaker 1: think there's a difference or you like a hard No, 435 00:18:47,681 --> 00:18:49,120 Speaker 1: you should just feel good within your skin. 436 00:18:49,441 --> 00:18:52,160 Speaker 4: There's definitely a difference. I definitely believe that there's a difference. 437 00:18:52,201 --> 00:18:55,361 Speaker 4: I also believe that everyone deserves to have like autonomy 438 00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:58,240 Speaker 4: and like sovereignty within themselves in their own body, Like 439 00:18:58,281 --> 00:19:00,281 Speaker 4: I would never want anybody to feel like that choice 440 00:19:00,321 --> 00:19:02,801 Speaker 4: is taken away from them. However, I think it's important 441 00:19:02,840 --> 00:19:05,801 Speaker 4: to understand like what place it comes from, because let's say, 442 00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:07,681 Speaker 4: for an example, if it comes from a place of 443 00:19:07,761 --> 00:19:10,960 Speaker 4: like deep insecurity, where it's like I need this in 444 00:19:11,080 --> 00:19:13,641 Speaker 4: order to be good enough, I need this in order 445 00:19:13,681 --> 00:19:17,521 Speaker 4: to feel valuable or to like receive attention or love 446 00:19:17,681 --> 00:19:19,960 Speaker 4: or praise from other people, then it's coming from a 447 00:19:20,001 --> 00:19:22,521 Speaker 4: place of serious lack, you know. And I can only 448 00:19:22,561 --> 00:19:23,920 Speaker 4: say it because I've been there, Like I got my 449 00:19:23,921 --> 00:19:26,120 Speaker 4: boobs done at eighteen, Like it was the first thing 450 00:19:26,120 --> 00:19:27,680 Speaker 4: that I did as soon as I turned eighteen, So 451 00:19:27,761 --> 00:19:30,881 Speaker 4: like I understand where that comes from. But it also 452 00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:33,041 Speaker 4: is like it can be really detrimental as well. It's 453 00:19:33,041 --> 00:19:35,521 Speaker 4: almost like a merryga around that, like you can't get off, 454 00:19:35,961 --> 00:19:37,600 Speaker 4: you know, if you go down there and you fall 455 00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:39,840 Speaker 4: down too deep, you can get stuck there. And you know, 456 00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:42,880 Speaker 4: you see that happen often with women kind of go 457 00:19:42,921 --> 00:19:45,441 Speaker 4: a little bit overboard, and obviously each to their own 458 00:19:45,441 --> 00:19:48,521 Speaker 4: of what that level actually looks like. But to the 459 00:19:48,561 --> 00:19:50,961 Speaker 4: degree that's like constant feel it, constant is constant that, 460 00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:54,080 Speaker 4: and constant upkeep, and then it's like, you know, everything's 461 00:19:54,120 --> 00:19:56,561 Speaker 4: perfectly presented on the outside, but it's like shell of 462 00:19:56,561 --> 00:19:58,961 Speaker 4: a human on the inside. And I can only say 463 00:19:59,001 --> 00:20:01,360 Speaker 4: that because I was that person. I was a shell 464 00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:04,920 Speaker 4: of a human being being that like so perfectly constructed 465 00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:07,321 Speaker 4: the outside, but then's nothing on the inside. It's like 466 00:20:07,360 --> 00:20:10,080 Speaker 4: you feel empty, you feel lonely, you don't feel good enough, 467 00:20:10,120 --> 00:20:12,521 Speaker 4: you feel insecure, you don't feel confident at all. 468 00:20:12,801 --> 00:20:15,641 Speaker 1: If you have to connect properly yourself, you know. 469 00:20:15,721 --> 00:20:18,321 Speaker 4: As well, because you're pretending to be somebody, you have 470 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:21,801 Speaker 4: this like persona on this mask of like who you 471 00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:24,440 Speaker 4: think you should be. That when you speak to people, 472 00:20:24,481 --> 00:20:26,041 Speaker 4: you don't even know what the fuck to say. 473 00:20:26,120 --> 00:20:27,120 Speaker 1: Yes, you know. 474 00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,361 Speaker 3: So there would be some good questions that people could 475 00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:31,281 Speaker 3: ask themselves if they're doing it for the right reasons. 476 00:20:31,281 --> 00:20:33,240 Speaker 3: Like I know there's a few things that I do 477 00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:35,960 Speaker 3: for convenience, Like even like my little glue on lashes 478 00:20:35,961 --> 00:20:37,400 Speaker 3: every now and then, if I know I've got things on, 479 00:20:37,481 --> 00:20:37,720 Speaker 3: I'm like. 480 00:20:37,721 --> 00:20:39,321 Speaker 1: Oh, just cclue the mon because they last like a week? 481 00:20:39,521 --> 00:20:39,721 Speaker 4: Yeap. 482 00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:42,561 Speaker 3: Is it because it's convenient or is it because of this? 483 00:20:42,561 --> 00:20:42,680 Speaker 4: This? 484 00:20:42,721 --> 00:20:42,960 Speaker 1: And this? 485 00:20:43,561 --> 00:20:46,161 Speaker 3: So like I ask the questions, what's the questions maybe 486 00:20:46,481 --> 00:20:47,361 Speaker 3: you can ask. 487 00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:49,400 Speaker 4: I think a good question would just be to ask, 488 00:20:49,961 --> 00:20:52,241 Speaker 4: is this coming from lack or is this coming from 489 00:20:52,241 --> 00:20:56,441 Speaker 4: an enhancement. It's just really simple, really basic, but also 490 00:20:56,481 --> 00:20:58,721 Speaker 4: gives you an indication of like, Okay, once I answer 491 00:20:58,801 --> 00:21:01,160 Speaker 4: this question, then I know how to deep dive, right, 492 00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:03,001 Speaker 4: because it's like we need to first identify like where 493 00:21:03,041 --> 00:21:05,041 Speaker 4: it's going to come from first. If it's like, okay, 494 00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:07,200 Speaker 4: am I doing this because I genuinely believed that, like 495 00:21:07,241 --> 00:21:09,521 Speaker 4: I'm not good enough if I don't have this as 496 00:21:09,521 --> 00:21:11,840 Speaker 4: opposed to this is something I actually just want to 497 00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:13,440 Speaker 4: do for myself because it feels good. It makes me 498 00:21:13,481 --> 00:21:15,881 Speaker 4: feel good. It's like two different places. 499 00:21:15,521 --> 00:21:17,241 Speaker 1: I've told this story. I think on the podcast before 500 00:21:17,281 --> 00:21:19,761 Speaker 1: we were talking about Miller getting bullied and it's something 501 00:21:19,801 --> 00:21:22,321 Speaker 1: I didn't share for years, but I've had my nose done, 502 00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:24,121 Speaker 1: and I was saying, like, if my little girl came 503 00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:26,001 Speaker 1: to me and was getting the level of bullying that 504 00:21:26,041 --> 00:21:27,880 Speaker 1: I was getting and she was a shell of a 505 00:21:27,961 --> 00:21:30,961 Speaker 1: human because of how unconfident she felt, like I would 506 00:21:30,961 --> 00:21:33,081 Speaker 1: one hundred percent stand behind her. Wanted to do that, 507 00:21:33,481 --> 00:21:35,440 Speaker 1: and my mom did. As soon as I was of age, 508 00:21:35,441 --> 00:21:37,760 Speaker 1: she took me to a surgeon. Yeah, and I'm still 509 00:21:37,840 --> 00:21:40,680 Speaker 1: so grateful because it was like my whole high school, 510 00:21:40,681 --> 00:21:41,920 Speaker 1: I was just no one wanted to get to know 511 00:21:41,961 --> 00:21:43,720 Speaker 1: who I was because it was just like Ashley with 512 00:21:43,761 --> 00:21:46,201 Speaker 1: the big nose, had rocks thrown at me, tomatoes thrown 513 00:21:46,241 --> 00:21:48,360 Speaker 1: at me, like people just picked me all the time. 514 00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:50,000 Speaker 1: I was called a prawn, ripped the head off, keep 515 00:21:50,041 --> 00:21:52,880 Speaker 1: the body, like at supermarkets, like people talking about how 516 00:21:52,921 --> 00:21:55,200 Speaker 1: by my nose was. It was just constant, and I 517 00:21:55,201 --> 00:21:58,160 Speaker 1: felt like I could not shine. I couldn't be my 518 00:21:58,281 --> 00:22:00,160 Speaker 1: true self. No one wanted to get to know because 519 00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:03,480 Speaker 1: I was so ugly, That's what I thought. And getting 520 00:22:03,481 --> 00:22:06,200 Speaker 1: that surgery, like it really did help me step into 521 00:22:06,441 --> 00:22:08,360 Speaker 1: be who I was and have this confidence so I 522 00:22:08,360 --> 00:22:12,120 Speaker 1: could shine bright. So like that's where I'm not against surgery, 523 00:22:12,201 --> 00:22:14,441 Speaker 1: because it really did change my life for the better. 524 00:22:15,041 --> 00:22:17,640 Speaker 1: It really can be the right decision for each individual, 525 00:22:17,681 --> 00:22:18,881 Speaker 1: depending on where it's coming from. 526 00:22:19,120 --> 00:22:21,680 Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, and even that like such a beautiful story 527 00:22:21,681 --> 00:22:23,680 Speaker 4: as well, and like I'm sorry that happened to you. 528 00:22:23,761 --> 00:22:25,880 Speaker 4: That's fucked up, Like people can be so ruthless. 529 00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:29,080 Speaker 1: So exactly, I think if my younger self, I'm like, fuck, no, 530 00:22:29,120 --> 00:22:30,761 Speaker 1: one don't even want to go to school. I'd sit 531 00:22:30,761 --> 00:22:32,321 Speaker 1: at the front of the class and someoneould call my 532 00:22:32,400 --> 00:22:33,840 Speaker 1: name and I'd turn around and they just like throw 533 00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:35,521 Speaker 1: something at me and call me a big nose. I 534 00:22:35,521 --> 00:22:37,241 Speaker 1: didn't want to go. I would hate for my kids 535 00:22:37,241 --> 00:22:39,561 Speaker 1: to experience that. So like something like that I think 536 00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:41,001 Speaker 1: is really beneficial and cool. 537 00:22:41,400 --> 00:22:44,200 Speaker 4: It is, it is, and it's also from the right place. Hey, 538 00:22:44,201 --> 00:22:46,160 Speaker 4: But even that in this sense coming from a place 539 00:22:46,201 --> 00:22:49,680 Speaker 4: of like my external isn't matching my internal. I feel like, 540 00:22:49,761 --> 00:22:52,321 Speaker 4: I don't know if that feels true for you, where 541 00:22:52,321 --> 00:22:53,960 Speaker 4: it's like who I am on the outside is not 542 00:22:54,001 --> 00:22:57,321 Speaker 4: embodying who I feel on the inside. And I feel like, yes, 543 00:22:57,481 --> 00:22:59,441 Speaker 4: potentially it does come from an insecurity, but then also 544 00:22:59,481 --> 00:23:01,441 Speaker 4: it comes from a beautiful place as well, So there's 545 00:23:01,481 --> 00:23:03,960 Speaker 4: like there's always two sides to everything. So it's like, 546 00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:05,721 Speaker 4: you know, in that moment, like what you said, it 547 00:23:05,840 --> 00:23:08,401 Speaker 4: also benefit you. It helped you come out of your 548 00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:11,440 Speaker 4: shell and overcome what you were feeling when you were 549 00:23:11,441 --> 00:23:13,760 Speaker 4: experiencing those things being bullied, and so it was actually 550 00:23:13,761 --> 00:23:16,600 Speaker 4: more beneficial for you. The decision that you made had 551 00:23:16,681 --> 00:23:18,400 Speaker 4: like a good return on investment for it. 552 00:23:18,521 --> 00:23:20,360 Speaker 1: Yes, And I kind of feel like that too, Like 553 00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:23,721 Speaker 1: it's different, but surgery is not as accepted these days. 554 00:23:23,721 --> 00:23:25,601 Speaker 1: But it's like someone that's really overweight and they don't 555 00:23:25,600 --> 00:23:27,801 Speaker 1: feel confident and comfortable in their own skin, and they 556 00:23:27,880 --> 00:23:29,801 Speaker 1: lose weight and they feel confident to shine and like 557 00:23:29,921 --> 00:23:32,080 Speaker 1: wear the shorts and go to the beach, Like that's 558 00:23:32,120 --> 00:23:34,561 Speaker 1: a nice, healthy decision that comes from a good place 559 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:36,321 Speaker 1: of wanting to be healthy and to be more confident. 560 00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:38,201 Speaker 1: It's the same with some surgeries. 561 00:23:38,241 --> 00:23:40,281 Speaker 3: Do you think if you were never teased about your nose, 562 00:23:40,321 --> 00:23:41,840 Speaker 3: it would be something that you would have wanted to 563 00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:43,360 Speaker 3: get done anyway, or do you think it was because 564 00:23:43,360 --> 00:23:45,400 Speaker 3: of those motherfuckers A mix. 565 00:23:45,561 --> 00:23:47,881 Speaker 1: I don't think I liked it, but they've really made 566 00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:50,521 Speaker 1: it very loud and clear that it was not attractive 567 00:23:51,201 --> 00:23:53,321 Speaker 1: until they pointed it out. I don't remember being like, 568 00:23:53,321 --> 00:23:56,241 Speaker 1: oh I hate my nose, but once everyone started pointing out, 569 00:23:56,281 --> 00:23:57,720 Speaker 1: it was like the thing known at the school. 570 00:23:57,961 --> 00:23:58,521 Speaker 4: Yeah. 571 00:23:58,561 --> 00:24:00,241 Speaker 1: And then when I could see people I used to 572 00:24:00,281 --> 00:24:02,521 Speaker 1: work at a supermarket if I saw people talk about 573 00:24:02,521 --> 00:24:04,400 Speaker 1: it too, which just like constant my face. And my 574 00:24:04,481 --> 00:24:06,761 Speaker 1: mum was the best person because she also had a 575 00:24:06,801 --> 00:24:08,120 Speaker 1: big nose and she was like, I get it. I 576 00:24:08,201 --> 00:24:10,600 Speaker 1: got so teased, Like I wish my parents could have 577 00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:13,240 Speaker 1: helped me get surgery. So I don't know a bit 578 00:24:13,281 --> 00:24:13,680 Speaker 1: of both. 579 00:24:14,441 --> 00:24:17,480 Speaker 4: Yeah, whether you're stuck in comparisonal where everybody else is. 580 00:24:17,840 --> 00:24:20,401 Speaker 4: We feel that social pressure from the external and being 581 00:24:20,441 --> 00:24:22,561 Speaker 4: like okay, well now these people are then saying this 582 00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:27,680 Speaker 4: about me based on them comparing to what is quotations 583 00:24:27,721 --> 00:24:31,281 Speaker 4: acceptable or the expectation or standard you know. So it's 584 00:24:31,321 --> 00:24:33,680 Speaker 4: like then that gets internalized as a wound and then 585 00:24:34,281 --> 00:24:36,480 Speaker 4: the deep rooted insecurity and it stays with you and 586 00:24:36,521 --> 00:24:39,521 Speaker 4: it's so tough, like those moments like never leave you. 587 00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:41,761 Speaker 4: So I can only imagine how it would have felt. 588 00:24:41,801 --> 00:24:43,120 Speaker 1: And as a parent, like I know you do it 589 00:24:43,201 --> 00:24:45,441 Speaker 1: with your girls and Lincoln as well, Like you try 590 00:24:45,441 --> 00:24:47,760 Speaker 1: to build so much confidence within them, but if there 591 00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:49,600 Speaker 1: is something that they ain't, Like if Miller comes to 592 00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:53,321 Speaker 1: you and says like I want to get vinears. Maybe 593 00:24:53,321 --> 00:24:55,721 Speaker 1: you are beautiful the way are you don't need that? Like, no, 594 00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:58,281 Speaker 1: You'll be like cool, let's explore this together. That's going 595 00:24:58,360 --> 00:25:01,521 Speaker 1: to make you feel more confident. You only work with women. 596 00:25:01,321 --> 00:25:04,360 Speaker 4: Right, not men predominantly. Eh. I market to women because 597 00:25:04,360 --> 00:25:06,441 Speaker 4: I've had the most experience with women. I haven't as 598 00:25:06,481 --> 00:25:08,321 Speaker 4: of yet, like worked with any men, but I wouldn't 599 00:25:08,321 --> 00:25:09,000 Speaker 4: be opposed to it. 600 00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:13,481 Speaker 1: Okay, Yeah, what would you say is the most common insecurity, like, say, 601 00:25:13,481 --> 00:25:15,961 Speaker 1: within the last twelve months that you're dealing with women, 602 00:25:16,120 --> 00:25:17,961 Speaker 1: is it like one that stands out? 603 00:25:18,281 --> 00:25:20,761 Speaker 4: I would say, like not believing in their capabilities? 604 00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:22,561 Speaker 1: Oh, overbody image? 605 00:25:22,961 --> 00:25:26,041 Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, overbody image, so like most of the 606 00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:28,000 Speaker 4: women do. But it's not the first thing that they 607 00:25:28,001 --> 00:25:28,561 Speaker 4: come to me with. 608 00:25:28,801 --> 00:25:30,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, so maybe later on. 609 00:25:30,321 --> 00:25:31,920 Speaker 4: I think it comes up later on where that's like 610 00:25:32,001 --> 00:25:34,761 Speaker 4: sometimes the deeper rooted stuff where it's like, Okay, this 611 00:25:34,921 --> 00:25:37,561 Speaker 4: is so uncomfortable to talk about that I don't want 612 00:25:37,561 --> 00:25:40,041 Speaker 4: to bring it up. So whereas the first few things 613 00:25:40,041 --> 00:25:42,041 Speaker 4: that actually come forward when the women come into me, 614 00:25:42,120 --> 00:25:44,960 Speaker 4: they're like, okay, like I'm struggling with this and I 615 00:25:45,001 --> 00:25:47,241 Speaker 4: want to do this for my career or like I'm 616 00:25:47,281 --> 00:25:50,240 Speaker 4: you know, struggling with relationships or whatever it is, and 617 00:25:50,281 --> 00:25:53,640 Speaker 4: that the core consensus is literally like I don't feel 618 00:25:53,681 --> 00:25:56,881 Speaker 4: capable enough. And it's yeah, it's so interesting. 619 00:25:57,041 --> 00:25:59,241 Speaker 1: I know for myself, it's so relatable, just my stepdad 620 00:25:59,241 --> 00:26:00,841 Speaker 1: telling me how dumb I was. Do you find most 621 00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:03,561 Speaker 1: of it comes from parents or like the younger years, 622 00:26:03,681 --> 00:26:05,041 Speaker 1: or is it more something that happens when they're old. 623 00:26:05,481 --> 00:26:08,761 Speaker 4: Predominantly it's like from childhood, so like predominantly it's from 624 00:26:08,801 --> 00:26:11,961 Speaker 4: like you know, their parent or caregiver being overly critical 625 00:26:12,041 --> 00:26:14,881 Speaker 4: of them, and then you know, like essentially your internal 626 00:26:14,880 --> 00:26:17,041 Speaker 4: dialogue is like your inner critic, which is your inner 627 00:26:17,041 --> 00:26:20,640 Speaker 4: critic is essentially your most critical guardian or caregiver, and 628 00:26:20,681 --> 00:26:23,521 Speaker 4: so you take on that narrative of yourself of the 629 00:26:23,521 --> 00:26:25,840 Speaker 4: way that they would treat you in those moments, you know, 630 00:26:25,921 --> 00:26:28,521 Speaker 4: at a young age. But I've had women, you know, 631 00:26:28,600 --> 00:26:31,321 Speaker 4: anywhere between like sixteen and twenty one come to me 632 00:26:31,441 --> 00:26:33,761 Speaker 4: with experiences from when they were sixteen to twenty one 633 00:26:34,360 --> 00:26:36,360 Speaker 4: in terms of like body image, you know, things that 634 00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:38,600 Speaker 4: they were dealing with at that time, not feeling capable 635 00:26:38,681 --> 00:26:41,200 Speaker 4: enough because something happened in school or high school, or 636 00:26:41,481 --> 00:26:42,880 Speaker 4: you know, a lot of women who come to me 637 00:26:43,001 --> 00:26:46,681 Speaker 4: have been you know, abused, or they've been clinically diagnosed 638 00:26:46,681 --> 00:26:50,921 Speaker 4: with depression anxiety like PTSD, like all of these different elements. 639 00:26:50,961 --> 00:26:53,641 Speaker 4: So everyone has their own unique story. But I find 640 00:26:53,681 --> 00:26:56,801 Speaker 4: it so interesting that the common theme is like women 641 00:26:56,880 --> 00:27:00,760 Speaker 4: aren't taught enough how to truly believe in themselves and 642 00:27:00,880 --> 00:27:04,321 Speaker 4: like be proud and to want to grow their self esteem, 643 00:27:04,721 --> 00:27:06,801 Speaker 4: you know, and to recognize their own value and know 644 00:27:06,880 --> 00:27:09,321 Speaker 4: that like it doesn't make you arrogant, it doesn't make 645 00:27:09,360 --> 00:27:11,160 Speaker 4: you rude, People aren't going to judge you for it, 646 00:27:11,241 --> 00:27:13,721 Speaker 4: and know that like that part of you is actually 647 00:27:13,761 --> 00:27:15,840 Speaker 4: such a beautiful element of who you are. And like 648 00:27:16,600 --> 00:27:20,081 Speaker 4: when you can build that, everything else in life becomes easier. 649 00:27:20,801 --> 00:27:23,880 Speaker 1: Yeah. We always talk about how much like our past 650 00:27:23,961 --> 00:27:26,720 Speaker 1: and our mistakes like shape who we are today. And 651 00:27:26,761 --> 00:27:28,721 Speaker 1: I love that we talk about that because I'm sure 652 00:27:28,721 --> 00:27:30,480 Speaker 1: you have that conversation with your clients too. The things 653 00:27:30,521 --> 00:27:32,041 Speaker 1: they come to you that are shameful around or they 654 00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:34,321 Speaker 1: feel like they've fouled out. It's like, so cool, that's 655 00:27:34,400 --> 00:27:36,080 Speaker 1: led to you to where you are. Now, Now what 656 00:27:36,080 --> 00:27:36,920 Speaker 1: are we going to do with that? 657 00:27:37,201 --> 00:27:39,801 Speaker 4: Yeah, that's so beautiful as well, because like a lot 658 00:27:39,801 --> 00:27:41,281 Speaker 4: of the wounds that do come up, it's say, the 659 00:27:41,321 --> 00:27:43,960 Speaker 4: core wound is like I'm not capable enough. There's layers 660 00:27:43,961 --> 00:27:46,120 Speaker 4: to it, right, It's like, okay, cool, let's go down 661 00:27:46,160 --> 00:27:48,640 Speaker 4: and let's explore this a little bit. Boom rejection wound, 662 00:27:48,761 --> 00:27:52,080 Speaker 4: boom abandonment wound, you know, and like all of these 663 00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:54,801 Speaker 4: deeper aspects, and I would say that that's actually the 664 00:27:54,801 --> 00:27:56,961 Speaker 4: most common thing is the abandonment wound. 665 00:27:58,400 --> 00:28:00,961 Speaker 1: I feel like every girl I speak to has that. Yeah, yeah, 666 00:28:01,441 --> 00:28:03,241 Speaker 1: some degree, definitely. 667 00:28:03,281 --> 00:28:04,840 Speaker 3: And do you find too this day and age with 668 00:28:05,041 --> 00:28:06,880 Speaker 3: social media, it seems to be having like a huge 669 00:28:06,921 --> 00:28:10,080 Speaker 3: impact on women's insecurities as well. 670 00:28:10,441 --> 00:28:14,201 Speaker 4: Yeah, I think it does increase people's insecurities because people 671 00:28:14,281 --> 00:28:18,440 Speaker 4: are comparing their selves to somebody else's highlight reel, you know, true, 672 00:28:18,481 --> 00:28:20,281 Speaker 4: and they only see you know, the winds and the 673 00:28:20,321 --> 00:28:22,880 Speaker 4: success and the cars and their relationships and you know, 674 00:28:22,961 --> 00:28:24,960 Speaker 4: all of their really good days because people want to 675 00:28:24,961 --> 00:28:28,400 Speaker 4: portray those things. That's beautiful, right, But it is an 676 00:28:28,600 --> 00:28:32,321 Speaker 4: unfair comparison when you are comparing yourself let's say, for example, 677 00:28:32,360 --> 00:28:35,360 Speaker 4: your whole pie to somebody else's quarter pie. Exactly. It 678 00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:39,041 Speaker 4: makes no sense because internally people are thinking, Okay, this 679 00:28:39,081 --> 00:28:42,401 Speaker 4: is what's happening for them. But I'm dealing with self judgment, 680 00:28:42,441 --> 00:28:44,761 Speaker 4: I'm dealing with shame. I'm dealing with this experience that 681 00:28:44,801 --> 00:28:48,481 Speaker 4: I had when I was sixteen, anger, frustration, resentment, all 682 00:28:48,521 --> 00:28:50,960 Speaker 4: these things, and like what is wrong with me? Like 683 00:28:51,041 --> 00:28:52,001 Speaker 4: is there something right with me? 684 00:28:52,161 --> 00:28:54,841 Speaker 1: Not have any of this? Yeah, it's not fair I 685 00:28:55,121 --> 00:28:58,561 Speaker 1: turn into a victim. You cannot compare someone's highlight reel 686 00:28:58,641 --> 00:29:01,681 Speaker 1: with your struggles or your chapter one with someone else's 687 00:29:01,721 --> 00:29:02,321 Speaker 1: chapter twenty. 688 00:29:02,441 --> 00:29:05,041 Speaker 4: Yeah, when you do feel insecure, how easy it is 689 00:29:05,081 --> 00:29:08,121 Speaker 4: to pedestal other people, you know, Like when you do that, 690 00:29:08,201 --> 00:29:11,441 Speaker 4: you take away the humanness exactly, and it's like, oh, wow, 691 00:29:11,481 --> 00:29:14,281 Speaker 4: now this person's up here. There's no humanis, there's no 692 00:29:14,321 --> 00:29:17,001 Speaker 4: human experience, there's no bad days and all those things. 693 00:29:17,321 --> 00:29:20,121 Speaker 4: Feeling insecure can make you and put you even further 694 00:29:20,161 --> 00:29:22,361 Speaker 4: into a box because you go, wow, well, the person 695 00:29:22,401 --> 00:29:26,081 Speaker 4: who I'm inspired by doesn't experience what I experience and 696 00:29:26,321 --> 00:29:30,601 Speaker 4: automatically create a gap between where you are as opposed 697 00:29:30,601 --> 00:29:32,960 Speaker 4: to like where everybody else is. And then it's just 698 00:29:33,361 --> 00:29:34,961 Speaker 4: when you do it on your own, when you don't 699 00:29:34,961 --> 00:29:37,801 Speaker 4: have anybody to talk to, it's not safe enough. Insecurity 700 00:29:37,841 --> 00:29:40,321 Speaker 4: is shunned and shamed and everyone needs to be perfect, 701 00:29:40,441 --> 00:29:42,041 Speaker 4: Like you don't have a space to be able to 702 00:29:42,081 --> 00:29:44,801 Speaker 4: talk about those things. When you don't, you internalize it 703 00:29:44,841 --> 00:29:47,601 Speaker 4: and you shame yourself for its toxic, and then it 704 00:29:47,681 --> 00:29:49,641 Speaker 4: just gets ten times heavy then it needs. 705 00:29:49,521 --> 00:29:51,881 Speaker 3: To be, and you know he's feeling bigger and bigger. 706 00:29:52,601 --> 00:29:56,681 Speaker 4: Yeah, gets bigger and bigger, and then you just carrying 707 00:29:56,721 --> 00:29:59,241 Speaker 4: a backpack full of bricks, like, oh day every day, 708 00:29:59,321 --> 00:30:00,801 Speaker 4: you know, and it's just not a good time. 709 00:30:01,121 --> 00:30:03,681 Speaker 1: Do you give your clients advice to take some time 710 00:30:03,681 --> 00:30:05,841 Speaker 1: off social media if you feel like it impacting them? 711 00:30:06,001 --> 00:30:08,921 Speaker 4: That's a great question. I actually encourage every single time 712 00:30:08,921 --> 00:30:10,801 Speaker 4: I have a client on board with me, I get 713 00:30:10,801 --> 00:30:12,761 Speaker 4: them to do a consumption fast. Have you had of 714 00:30:12,761 --> 00:30:17,441 Speaker 4: that much similar? Yeah, yeah, it would be the same thing. 715 00:30:17,601 --> 00:30:20,321 Speaker 4: So it's six weeks basically, and you're not allowed to 716 00:30:20,361 --> 00:30:25,841 Speaker 4: consume anyone anything. No podcasts, no books, no TV, no Netflix. 717 00:30:26,361 --> 00:30:29,321 Speaker 4: You have to actually do this, Yeah, I make that. 718 00:30:29,961 --> 00:30:33,201 Speaker 4: You have to mute everyone on social media, mute their stories, 719 00:30:33,281 --> 00:30:35,841 Speaker 4: mute their posts. But you're still allowed to post, so 720 00:30:35,881 --> 00:30:39,121 Speaker 4: you can still you can still actively post whatever it 721 00:30:39,161 --> 00:30:40,881 Speaker 4: is that you feel you want to post on social media, 722 00:30:41,041 --> 00:30:44,281 Speaker 4: but you're not allowed to consume anybody. And the purpose 723 00:30:44,321 --> 00:30:47,041 Speaker 4: of this exactly what you just said. Yeah, you block 724 00:30:47,081 --> 00:30:49,121 Speaker 4: out the outside noise and a lot of the times 725 00:30:49,121 --> 00:30:52,440 Speaker 4: with like low self esteem, right, it's women struggle with 726 00:30:52,521 --> 00:30:55,041 Speaker 4: having a strong sense of self, right, and they have 727 00:30:55,241 --> 00:30:58,841 Speaker 4: struggle with that because they're consuming everyone all the time, 728 00:30:59,521 --> 00:31:02,361 Speaker 4: and so drowning out that noise allows them to sit 729 00:31:02,401 --> 00:31:05,081 Speaker 4: with themselves for long enough that their own opinion and 730 00:31:05,121 --> 00:31:07,921 Speaker 4: start coming back up. They get to stop being triggered 731 00:31:08,001 --> 00:31:10,881 Speaker 4: twenty four seven with the exact people who are triggering 732 00:31:10,881 --> 00:31:12,841 Speaker 4: their insecurities. They get to sit with themselves for a 733 00:31:12,841 --> 00:31:15,641 Speaker 4: little bit and rebuild the foundation of like I'm building 734 00:31:15,641 --> 00:31:18,681 Speaker 4: my strong sense of self. Their opinions come back, their 735 00:31:18,721 --> 00:31:22,321 Speaker 4: perspectives come back. They can explore their own knowledge, their 736 00:31:22,361 --> 00:31:26,121 Speaker 4: own wisdom, enjoy life like, experience what life is like 737 00:31:26,161 --> 00:31:28,761 Speaker 4: without constantly being reminded of how they aren't good enough. 738 00:31:29,161 --> 00:31:31,641 Speaker 4: And once they build a foundation of that, they can 739 00:31:31,641 --> 00:31:34,281 Speaker 4: then introduce themselves back into social media and go, oh wow, 740 00:31:34,321 --> 00:31:38,200 Speaker 4: this isn't as triggering anymore because they with process and 741 00:31:38,361 --> 00:31:41,601 Speaker 4: things like that. Yeah, you build like a stronger relationship. 742 00:31:41,121 --> 00:31:43,281 Speaker 3: With yourself with reading as well. How you mentioned that 743 00:31:43,321 --> 00:31:45,841 Speaker 3: as one thing, Yeah, because I feel like even sometimes 744 00:31:45,921 --> 00:31:47,720 Speaker 3: I can go deep down the rabbit hole of like 745 00:31:47,841 --> 00:31:49,601 Speaker 3: just trying to get better, trying to get better, yeah, 746 00:31:49,601 --> 00:31:52,161 Speaker 3: really to the detriment of me, And I'm like, Kiara, 747 00:31:52,201 --> 00:31:53,881 Speaker 3: it's all good, Like you will get there in your 748 00:31:53,881 --> 00:31:56,161 Speaker 3: own time, but it's like you're trying to fast track it, 749 00:31:56,201 --> 00:31:57,601 Speaker 3: so you're trying to read all the books, do all 750 00:31:57,601 --> 00:31:59,721 Speaker 3: the things. Yeah, that's really interesting that you said as well, 751 00:31:59,761 --> 00:32:00,520 Speaker 3: like pauls on them. 752 00:32:01,121 --> 00:32:04,521 Speaker 4: Yeah, because personal development can be unproductive sometimes, right, Yeah. 753 00:32:05,161 --> 00:32:07,121 Speaker 4: I feel like that too sometimes where I'm like sometimes 754 00:32:07,161 --> 00:32:09,041 Speaker 4: I'm just doing it to tick the box and I'm like, 755 00:32:09,521 --> 00:32:10,801 Speaker 4: I'm not even having a good time. 756 00:32:11,081 --> 00:32:12,761 Speaker 1: I felt like that would try to read a physical 757 00:32:12,801 --> 00:32:14,681 Speaker 1: self development book. It felt like I needed to do it. 758 00:32:14,801 --> 00:32:16,161 Speaker 1: But now I'm like, I like to listen to it. 759 00:32:16,201 --> 00:32:18,281 Speaker 1: But I felt like I needed to like get through these. 760 00:32:18,161 --> 00:32:20,081 Speaker 4: Books because it's like, oh, well, if it's physical, then 761 00:32:20,081 --> 00:32:23,361 Speaker 4: I'm yeah, yeah. 762 00:32:23,521 --> 00:32:28,321 Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm plucking from everything. Yeah, like there's no podcasts, 763 00:32:28,361 --> 00:32:30,241 Speaker 3: no nothing for connected with ourselves. 764 00:32:30,801 --> 00:32:32,801 Speaker 1: Yeah, and with nature, it's just so much more ground 765 00:32:32,841 --> 00:32:34,161 Speaker 1: than and calm, and like I didn't know what was 766 00:32:34,161 --> 00:32:36,601 Speaker 1: going on anyone's world, and I actually didn't care, isn't it. 767 00:32:37,121 --> 00:32:38,881 Speaker 1: I want to know what's going on and everyone's. 768 00:32:39,001 --> 00:32:40,801 Speaker 4: And you know what I find is really interesting when 769 00:32:40,801 --> 00:32:43,521 Speaker 4: I did so. I first did this consumption fast and 770 00:32:43,521 --> 00:32:45,321 Speaker 4: then I did it for another six weeks and then 771 00:32:45,401 --> 00:32:48,161 Speaker 4: I just basically have like everyone muted other than like 772 00:32:48,441 --> 00:32:54,161 Speaker 4: you guys, because like I know the impact and like 773 00:32:54,201 --> 00:32:56,121 Speaker 4: the positive impact that it has. And when I first 774 00:32:56,201 --> 00:32:59,881 Speaker 4: did it, I realized how much I was creating false 775 00:32:59,961 --> 00:33:01,001 Speaker 4: connections with people. 776 00:33:01,001 --> 00:33:01,881 Speaker 1: Oh interesting. 777 00:33:02,161 --> 00:33:04,401 Speaker 4: I was watching people's lives and going, oh, I'm up 778 00:33:04,401 --> 00:33:06,720 Speaker 4: to date with what you doing, but I'm actually not 779 00:33:06,721 --> 00:33:07,881 Speaker 4: connecting with you in any way. 780 00:33:08,001 --> 00:33:09,961 Speaker 1: I actually noticed you have a really small following list 781 00:33:09,961 --> 00:33:12,121 Speaker 1: because I try and keep mine under five hundred. Then 782 00:33:12,121 --> 00:33:14,441 Speaker 1: I saw you had two hundreds, Like, oh shit, yeah, 783 00:33:14,721 --> 00:33:17,161 Speaker 1: they go through another because it's cool, Like if you're 784 00:33:17,201 --> 00:33:18,641 Speaker 1: not following them, you're not consuming it. 785 00:33:18,721 --> 00:33:21,720 Speaker 4: Yeah. Self development can be like unproductive. So it's like, 786 00:33:21,761 --> 00:33:23,960 Speaker 4: you know, the person who constantly buys and needs to 787 00:33:24,041 --> 00:33:25,881 Speaker 4: like do more and more and more is like, is 788 00:33:25,881 --> 00:33:28,081 Speaker 4: that also coming from an insecurity of like not doing enough? 789 00:33:28,081 --> 00:33:30,121 Speaker 1: It's coming from a place of lack lack. Yeah, to 790 00:33:30,201 --> 00:33:32,401 Speaker 1: be smarter, to be accepted and we make more successful 791 00:33:32,401 --> 00:33:35,201 Speaker 1: than I'll be more loved or have the money, more significance. 792 00:33:34,961 --> 00:33:35,841 Speaker 4: Or be more valuable. 793 00:33:36,161 --> 00:33:38,440 Speaker 1: It's in a more like more and more like instead 794 00:33:38,481 --> 00:33:40,601 Speaker 1: of just being present and content with who you are 795 00:33:40,641 --> 00:33:44,921 Speaker 1: where you're at, Yeah, giving yourself that space so cool 796 00:33:45,441 --> 00:33:47,601 Speaker 1: with your work do people have like a one off 797 00:33:47,641 --> 00:33:49,641 Speaker 1: session with you or is it like a three month 798 00:33:49,761 --> 00:33:51,480 Speaker 1: blocking We're going to go hard and by the end 799 00:33:51,521 --> 00:33:53,641 Speaker 1: of it you're going to feel X y Z. How 800 00:33:53,681 --> 00:33:55,361 Speaker 1: does it work with people wanting to work with you? 801 00:33:55,561 --> 00:33:58,201 Speaker 4: Yes, sir, I predominantly just do like one on one 802 00:33:58,201 --> 00:34:00,281 Speaker 4: coaching at the moment, So like I'm doing twelve weeks, 803 00:34:00,281 --> 00:34:02,521 Speaker 4: you can like lock in twelve weeks. I have like 804 00:34:02,521 --> 00:34:04,401 Speaker 4: I've just introduced like a new option at the moment, 805 00:34:04,441 --> 00:34:06,361 Speaker 4: So it's like twelve weeks of one coaching, which is 806 00:34:06,801 --> 00:34:09,040 Speaker 4: one on one calls. And then also Boxer supports. You've 807 00:34:09,041 --> 00:34:11,201 Speaker 4: also got me like every day of the week, like 808 00:34:11,281 --> 00:34:13,521 Speaker 4: in your back pocket to help with everything. 809 00:34:13,041 --> 00:34:15,961 Speaker 1: That group really so for people who don't have support 810 00:34:16,001 --> 00:34:18,041 Speaker 1: at home with the friendship group, like they've just got 811 00:34:18,321 --> 00:34:18,881 Speaker 1: like a sister. 812 00:34:19,281 --> 00:34:21,801 Speaker 4: Honestly, Foxer is my favorite thing because it's just like 813 00:34:21,841 --> 00:34:22,801 Speaker 4: conversations like this. 814 00:34:23,001 --> 00:34:24,681 Speaker 1: I remember we first met and I was like going 815 00:34:24,681 --> 00:34:26,361 Speaker 1: through something like they've done like Boxer. 816 00:34:26,801 --> 00:34:31,321 Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's in real time, so it's when they 817 00:34:31,401 --> 00:34:34,641 Speaker 3: actually need you, Yeah, having the meltdown, having the moment, 818 00:34:34,961 --> 00:34:35,721 Speaker 3: it's like they've got you. 819 00:34:35,801 --> 00:34:37,441 Speaker 4: It's so good and it's almost like like this like 820 00:34:37,481 --> 00:34:40,081 Speaker 4: having a live conversation, and I think there's something so 821 00:34:40,161 --> 00:34:41,921 Speaker 4: beautiful about knowing that the person is there when we 822 00:34:41,961 --> 00:34:44,681 Speaker 4: need them is like a game changer as opposed to 823 00:34:44,721 --> 00:34:47,121 Speaker 4: like I went through this thing and now two weeks later, 824 00:34:47,121 --> 00:34:48,601 Speaker 4: I'm jumping in a one on one call with you. 825 00:34:48,881 --> 00:34:50,601 Speaker 4: Let me just like catch up and remember all the 826 00:34:50,601 --> 00:34:52,281 Speaker 4: things that I was feeling in that moment. You know. 827 00:34:52,481 --> 00:34:56,121 Speaker 4: So I think it's so much more transformative having Boxer 828 00:34:56,281 --> 00:34:58,881 Speaker 4: end calls. You can just like collapse time in what 829 00:34:58,961 --> 00:35:01,361 Speaker 4: you can heal through. And then I'm also offering as well, 830 00:35:01,441 --> 00:35:05,561 Speaker 4: just Boxer only for twelve weeks. I was just introducing this. Yeah, yeah, 831 00:35:05,641 --> 00:35:07,241 Speaker 4: so that'll be something that I offer as well. 832 00:35:07,321 --> 00:35:10,961 Speaker 1: I love that I've noticed a shift in your content 833 00:35:11,201 --> 00:35:14,041 Speaker 1: on your tiktoks and your Instagram. Really yeah. It used 834 00:35:14,041 --> 00:35:16,081 Speaker 1: to be just like a couple of nice quotes or 835 00:35:16,081 --> 00:35:17,481 Speaker 1: like you're steering out the window and you have some 836 00:35:17,561 --> 00:35:19,521 Speaker 1: words on there, but now it's like the things you 837 00:35:19,561 --> 00:35:22,561 Speaker 1: say is so I'm like, she took it to me. 838 00:35:23,241 --> 00:35:23,961 Speaker 1: I need to hear that. 839 00:35:24,001 --> 00:35:24,521 Speaker 4: Excellent. 840 00:35:24,801 --> 00:35:26,480 Speaker 1: Even if people don't work with you, like I really 841 00:35:26,481 --> 00:35:28,761 Speaker 1: advise you go follow you because like you post every 842 00:35:28,801 --> 00:35:32,161 Speaker 1: single day. You're so consistent the information. It's like just 843 00:35:32,201 --> 00:35:34,321 Speaker 1: the way you explain things everybody in the car the 844 00:35:34,361 --> 00:35:37,641 Speaker 1: other day, it's like you just know so much. I 845 00:35:37,721 --> 00:35:39,641 Speaker 1: just love it. I talk to you all the time, 846 00:35:39,681 --> 00:35:42,480 Speaker 1: and every video you post, I'm like, wow, bam, that's true, 847 00:35:42,601 --> 00:35:44,081 Speaker 1: Like oh my gosh, and think about it like that. 848 00:35:44,441 --> 00:35:46,321 Speaker 1: So thank you, even for that free advice that you 849 00:35:46,321 --> 00:35:46,641 Speaker 1: give out. 850 00:35:46,681 --> 00:35:47,161 Speaker 4: You've got your. 851 00:35:47,041 --> 00:35:48,440 Speaker 1: Broadcast channel, it's so cool. 852 00:35:48,641 --> 00:35:49,041 Speaker 4: Thank you. 853 00:35:49,121 --> 00:35:51,081 Speaker 1: So many ways that people can connect with you and 854 00:35:51,161 --> 00:35:53,281 Speaker 1: learn from you. And this has come from you know, 855 00:35:53,481 --> 00:35:55,721 Speaker 1: like the last six years. If you deep diving in 856 00:35:55,761 --> 00:35:59,681 Speaker 1: your self development, work through pain, through different experiences, it's 857 00:35:59,721 --> 00:36:01,761 Speaker 1: just so beautiful you can share all that with everyone now. 858 00:36:01,881 --> 00:36:04,121 Speaker 4: Thank you. I appreciate that. Honestly, I just want to 859 00:36:04,121 --> 00:36:07,121 Speaker 4: have like a space where like personal development is so accessible, 860 00:36:07,281 --> 00:36:09,201 Speaker 4: like I feel like for the longest time and fun. 861 00:36:09,281 --> 00:36:10,161 Speaker 1: Yeah, you're cheeky. 862 00:36:10,201 --> 00:36:13,521 Speaker 4: Sometimes I am very cheeky, And that's the whole point 863 00:36:13,521 --> 00:36:15,681 Speaker 4: of like a part of my message is like being 864 00:36:15,721 --> 00:36:18,041 Speaker 4: able to look at these insecurities and treat your life 865 00:36:18,081 --> 00:36:21,161 Speaker 4: like a game. Treat finding insecurities like a game, as 866 00:36:21,161 --> 00:36:22,761 Speaker 4: if like okay, the next time that I see in 867 00:36:22,761 --> 00:36:24,841 Speaker 4: insecurity of mine, I'm going to have a confidence of 868 00:36:24,961 --> 00:36:27,161 Speaker 4: lovel on the other side. Okay, let's go seek that, yeah, 869 00:36:27,401 --> 00:36:29,001 Speaker 4: as opposed to like, oh, let me hide this in 870 00:36:29,041 --> 00:36:30,841 Speaker 4: a hider way and like never let anybody see this 871 00:36:30,881 --> 00:36:33,321 Speaker 4: because I'm so shameful of it. So it's like I 872 00:36:33,361 --> 00:36:35,681 Speaker 4: know what it feels like from experiences that I've had 873 00:36:35,921 --> 00:36:38,121 Speaker 4: to be so consumed by shame, and I just want 874 00:36:38,161 --> 00:36:40,401 Speaker 4: to be able to release that for everyone and like 875 00:36:40,481 --> 00:36:42,081 Speaker 4: actually make personal development fun again. 876 00:36:42,321 --> 00:36:44,881 Speaker 1: Yeah, and it can be fun. It does make it fun. 877 00:36:45,001 --> 00:36:46,761 Speaker 4: So we make it fun. 878 00:36:48,481 --> 00:36:50,601 Speaker 1: That's what we try to do as well with our podcasts, 879 00:36:50,601 --> 00:36:54,641 Speaker 1: and like we jump on the I can see that, yeah, deep, 880 00:36:54,641 --> 00:36:56,761 Speaker 1: but like we can have fun whilst we go through 881 00:36:56,801 --> 00:37:00,161 Speaker 1: the ship while we in it. Surrounding yourself with sisterhood 882 00:37:00,161 --> 00:37:01,801 Speaker 1: as well, that makes it fun alone. 883 00:37:01,881 --> 00:37:04,121 Speaker 4: Yeah, I think even just being on this podcast as 884 00:37:04,121 --> 00:37:05,881 Speaker 4: well with you guys. You guys have such a playful, 885 00:37:05,921 --> 00:37:08,001 Speaker 4: beautiful energy about you both, and you bounce off each 886 00:37:08,001 --> 00:37:10,561 Speaker 4: other and the flow of the conversation can go like 887 00:37:10,641 --> 00:37:12,881 Speaker 4: quite deep. But then it's also like, oh now we're laughing. 888 00:37:12,881 --> 00:37:19,161 Speaker 4: Now we're talking about boobs. Now we're talking about that's like, 889 00:37:19,281 --> 00:37:21,761 Speaker 4: that's vulnerability, that's just being a self. 890 00:37:22,201 --> 00:37:24,081 Speaker 1: That's why I think we're leaders too, because the more 891 00:37:24,081 --> 00:37:26,281 Speaker 1: that we are ourselves, more we can lead and show 892 00:37:26,321 --> 00:37:28,081 Speaker 1: other women that they too can be themselves and be 893 00:37:28,121 --> 00:37:30,921 Speaker 1: fully loved and fully accepted and fully worthy of all 894 00:37:30,921 --> 00:37:33,321 Speaker 1: the things that they desire, regardless of what you look 895 00:37:33,401 --> 00:37:35,081 Speaker 1: like or where you've come from, or the shit you've 896 00:37:35,121 --> 00:37:37,321 Speaker 1: done or the things that have happened to you. And 897 00:37:37,361 --> 00:37:39,601 Speaker 1: we're walking examples of that, and that's why we're here today. 898 00:37:39,601 --> 00:37:41,921 Speaker 1: I suppose thank you so much for being here. It's 899 00:37:41,921 --> 00:37:44,281 Speaker 1: not the end, because you're coming back on Wednesday. What 900 00:37:44,321 --> 00:37:45,761 Speaker 1: are we talking about on Wednesday? Just to give them 901 00:37:45,801 --> 00:37:46,521 Speaker 1: a little heads. 902 00:37:46,401 --> 00:37:48,440 Speaker 4: Up, thank you for having me. Both of you. We're 903 00:37:48,441 --> 00:37:50,480 Speaker 4: going to be talking and deep diving into ego, which 904 00:37:50,521 --> 00:37:52,361 Speaker 4: is going to be I'm excited. It's just going to 905 00:37:52,361 --> 00:37:54,041 Speaker 4: be such a beautiful deep dive of like everything I 906 00:37:54,081 --> 00:37:56,001 Speaker 4: was talking about in terms of like wearing the cool 907 00:37:56,001 --> 00:37:58,241 Speaker 4: gold masks. So we're going to dive into that. 908 00:37:58,321 --> 00:37:59,961 Speaker 1: I know a little bit about ego, but it's not 909 00:38:00,041 --> 00:38:02,641 Speaker 1: something i've ever dived deep into with a coach or 910 00:38:02,721 --> 00:38:04,000 Speaker 1: like really learned about. 911 00:38:04,321 --> 00:38:04,801 Speaker 4: I'm excited. 912 00:38:04,801 --> 00:38:06,801 Speaker 1: I just kind of know that it feels yucky when 913 00:38:06,801 --> 00:38:08,681 Speaker 1: someone's in their ego or I can feel when I'm 914 00:38:08,721 --> 00:38:11,321 Speaker 1: in my ego. I understand it, but not to the 915 00:38:11,361 --> 00:38:12,881 Speaker 1: level that I think you'll be able to teach us. 916 00:38:14,081 --> 00:38:16,761 Speaker 4: Get ready, get your popcorn and bring your friends. 917 00:38:16,881 --> 00:38:18,401 Speaker 3: Where can everyone find you as well? 918 00:38:18,441 --> 00:38:18,801 Speaker 1: Tiana? 919 00:38:19,281 --> 00:38:22,641 Speaker 4: Just on Instagram. I'm on Instagram and TikTok just Tiana Bundalo. 920 00:38:23,001 --> 00:38:25,801 Speaker 1: Say how you spell your name because I spell it right. 921 00:38:27,001 --> 00:38:30,081 Speaker 4: Yeah, So it's t I j A n A b 922 00:38:30,201 --> 00:38:32,440 Speaker 4: U n d A l O. So you can find 923 00:38:32,481 --> 00:38:34,601 Speaker 4: me on Instagram. You can find me on TikTok, and 924 00:38:34,721 --> 00:38:36,361 Speaker 4: if you are open to it, send me a message. 925 00:38:36,361 --> 00:38:37,081 Speaker 4: I'm open for a chat. 926 00:38:37,121 --> 00:38:38,960 Speaker 1: And you do those what are those free audit things 927 00:38:38,961 --> 00:38:41,281 Speaker 1: you do? Because I love that I do free self 928 00:38:41,321 --> 00:38:42,281 Speaker 1: worth audits. Yeah. 929 00:38:42,321 --> 00:38:44,241 Speaker 4: So basically what I do is like, if you're feeling 930 00:38:44,281 --> 00:38:46,361 Speaker 4: like you're not really sure what you're struggling with within 931 00:38:46,401 --> 00:38:48,241 Speaker 4: your self worth, and you're just like, I know that 932 00:38:48,361 --> 00:38:51,081 Speaker 4: something is not right, but I don't know what, and 933 00:38:51,121 --> 00:38:53,321 Speaker 4: you want to discover what that is. With the free 934 00:38:53,321 --> 00:38:55,481 Speaker 4: self worth audit, I get you to feel out like 935 00:38:55,481 --> 00:38:57,881 Speaker 4: a form basically, and I take you through like a 936 00:38:57,881 --> 00:39:00,681 Speaker 4: thirty minute call, give you three pain points that you're 937 00:39:00,681 --> 00:39:03,121 Speaker 4: currently dealing with based on what you fell out that 938 00:39:03,161 --> 00:39:05,841 Speaker 4: you can then go and work on to start increasing 939 00:39:05,841 --> 00:39:08,521 Speaker 4: your level of like self esteem and self works amazing. 940 00:39:08,641 --> 00:39:11,081 Speaker 4: It's honestly been such a game change. Of the feedback 941 00:39:11,121 --> 00:39:12,641 Speaker 4: that I've had from it has been phenomenal. I've had 942 00:39:12,641 --> 00:39:14,681 Speaker 4: literally one of one clients come in from that being like, 943 00:39:14,761 --> 00:39:16,801 Speaker 4: oh my god, like this is a whole other world. 944 00:39:17,041 --> 00:39:19,001 Speaker 1: So it's just a cool intro. If you're listening and 945 00:39:19,041 --> 00:39:20,601 Speaker 1: like you're scared to get help with you you're not 946 00:39:20,641 --> 00:39:23,121 Speaker 1: ready to quite commit to a twelve week flock, come 947 00:39:23,121 --> 00:39:25,041 Speaker 1: and do this for free. So I consume new content 948 00:39:25,121 --> 00:39:27,121 Speaker 1: and just like let that be your first step that 949 00:39:27,161 --> 00:39:27,881 Speaker 1: you're taking action. 950 00:39:28,041 --> 00:39:29,881 Speaker 4: And it's free as well, and you can take away 951 00:39:29,881 --> 00:39:32,161 Speaker 4: from that as well. You can go implement those things 952 00:39:32,161 --> 00:39:35,081 Speaker 4: for the next twelve weeks and you'd see such phenomenal change. 953 00:39:35,161 --> 00:39:36,521 Speaker 4: So I encourage you to come to it. 954 00:39:36,601 --> 00:39:40,281 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's awesome. Thank you, thanks for being here your Wednesday. 955 00:39:40,281 --> 00:39:43,121 Speaker 1: It sounds good. Thanks for having me. Love things. Bye.