1 00:00:00,640 --> 00:00:02,720 Speaker 1: I get a team with Bloody rolling. We started the 2 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:05,000 Speaker 1: good stuff before we press the go button. So fuck it. 3 00:00:05,040 --> 00:00:08,760 Speaker 1: I've just put the pause button on Ben Sury, Tiffany 4 00:00:08,760 --> 00:00:11,319 Speaker 1: and called Craig Ethney half of the You Project. We're 5 00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:16,079 Speaker 1: just talking, Ben Surry, welcome officially to the typ Thanks 6 00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:16,760 Speaker 1: for joining. 7 00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:21,000 Speaker 2: Us, thanks for having me, thanks for being hat champion. 8 00:00:21,160 --> 00:00:25,599 Speaker 1: Now we're just talking about your aversion to dogs, but 9 00:00:25,720 --> 00:00:28,720 Speaker 1: your love of cats and Tiff was a little bit upset. 10 00:00:30,080 --> 00:00:33,680 Speaker 1: Let's unpack that. What's she suggested you might be a sociopath. 11 00:00:35,680 --> 00:00:36,960 Speaker 1: I want to hear your defense. 12 00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:40,280 Speaker 2: I have a very clear defense to go straight to 13 00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:42,760 Speaker 2: my backstory. I grew up on a farm in New 14 00:00:42,840 --> 00:00:46,120 Speaker 2: Zealand and dogs are working animals, so you don't play 15 00:00:46,159 --> 00:00:47,600 Speaker 2: with that. In fact, you're not even allowed to play 16 00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:49,240 Speaker 2: with them, otherwise you might ruin them and they can't 17 00:00:49,320 --> 00:00:53,440 Speaker 2: mustard the sheet properly. So you know, you guys can 18 00:00:53,440 --> 00:00:55,120 Speaker 2: come back at me with something now if you like. 19 00:00:55,240 --> 00:00:56,360 Speaker 2: But what do you go? 20 00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:59,640 Speaker 1: That's Tiff, what do you I can't see your dog 21 00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:02,520 Speaker 1: must doing anything other than the cat, and I feel 22 00:01:02,600 --> 00:01:05,640 Speaker 1: like your cat's more likely to muster your dog. So 23 00:01:05,760 --> 00:01:08,920 Speaker 1: your two animals apart from being cute, are fucking useless. 24 00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:12,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, I was going to I agree with you there, Craig. 25 00:01:12,240 --> 00:01:14,840 Speaker 2: I do look at the domestic dogs in Melbourne. I 26 00:01:14,880 --> 00:01:17,280 Speaker 2: think they are quite useless. They couldn't muster a sheep 27 00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:19,720 Speaker 2: or be of any use on a farm. 28 00:01:19,959 --> 00:01:24,119 Speaker 1: No, they couldn't muster for a fucking butterfly. Anyway, They 29 00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:25,400 Speaker 1: muster my emotions. 30 00:01:25,440 --> 00:01:27,880 Speaker 2: Doesn't that count. That's a bit of a fun that 31 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:28,479 Speaker 2: does count. 32 00:01:28,640 --> 00:01:31,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, that doesn't. They have definitely corralled you into the 33 00:01:31,959 --> 00:01:34,520 Speaker 1: top emotional paddock and they've got you stuck in the 34 00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:39,920 Speaker 1: corner like a fucking in an emotional prison, with the 35 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:42,400 Speaker 1: keys being held by a fucking dog and a cat 36 00:01:43,880 --> 00:01:49,800 Speaker 1: being helped to ransom in your own place. Hey, beneficially, 37 00:01:49,840 --> 00:01:52,600 Speaker 1: thanks for coming on the show. You're a busy man, 38 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:55,920 Speaker 1: and yeah, we appreciate you taking the time. 39 00:01:56,600 --> 00:02:02,520 Speaker 2: That's an absolute pleasure to chat with you. 40 00:02:00,480 --> 00:02:05,080 Speaker 1: Now without me doing some boring monologue about how amazing 41 00:02:05,120 --> 00:02:06,800 Speaker 1: you are and all the shit you've done. Can you 42 00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:10,560 Speaker 1: give to seven people on in my audience who don't 43 00:02:10,560 --> 00:02:14,040 Speaker 1: know you. I'm suggesting the majority do that who don't 44 00:02:14,080 --> 00:02:17,519 Speaker 1: know you. Can you give us the self bio? 45 00:02:18,120 --> 00:02:18,440 Speaker 2: What do you. 46 00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:21,639 Speaker 1: You know, when people don't know you, which I'm sure 47 00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:25,080 Speaker 1: happens periodically, and they go, what do you do? What's 48 00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:25,840 Speaker 1: the answer to that? 49 00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:29,800 Speaker 2: I hate talking about myself in that way, but I 50 00:02:29,840 --> 00:02:32,720 Speaker 2: guess I'm a chef. I own a restaurant called Attica 51 00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:39,079 Speaker 2: in Melbourne. I live a very passionate life and I'm 52 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:41,360 Speaker 2: into people and everything kind of I come from New 53 00:02:41,440 --> 00:02:47,800 Speaker 2: Zealand and I'm a dad friend trying not to fuck 54 00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:53,079 Speaker 2: anything up too much. That's kind of generally my my idea. 55 00:02:53,320 --> 00:02:55,000 Speaker 1: Well, you fucked it up with TIF straight out of 56 00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:57,000 Speaker 1: the gates, so you've got about now to repair that 57 00:02:57,080 --> 00:02:58,560 Speaker 1: damage relationship with B. 58 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:00,359 Speaker 2: I'll try hard. 59 00:03:02,639 --> 00:03:04,800 Speaker 1: I feel like you're an uh. I was going to 60 00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:07,320 Speaker 1: phrase say frustrated, but definitely not frustrated, but I feel 61 00:03:07,360 --> 00:03:10,680 Speaker 1: like you're an artist. Like I knew of you, but 62 00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:12,560 Speaker 1: didn't You and I had a brief chat the other 63 00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:16,560 Speaker 1: day for about thirty nine seconds, and I've got to 64 00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:18,800 Speaker 1: know each other a little bit. I knew about Attica, 65 00:03:18,840 --> 00:03:21,919 Speaker 1: I knew about you, but I didn't know you. But 66 00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:23,760 Speaker 1: the more I've been having to look at your stuff 67 00:03:23,760 --> 00:03:26,720 Speaker 1: and reading about you and listening to a bit recently, 68 00:03:27,440 --> 00:03:30,320 Speaker 1: I feel like you're really just an artist who expresses 69 00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:33,440 Speaker 1: himself in different ways. 70 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:35,360 Speaker 2: That's an interesting take that you get straight to that 71 00:03:35,520 --> 00:03:39,720 Speaker 2: there's a history of shit of sort of ridiculing chefs 72 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:42,760 Speaker 2: that call themselves artists. So there's always that kind of 73 00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:44,640 Speaker 2: history in that part of our culture where I'm kind 74 00:03:44,640 --> 00:03:47,520 Speaker 2: of reluctant to call myself an artist. But certainly the 75 00:03:47,600 --> 00:03:50,840 Speaker 2: project of the restaurant is an art project. You know, 76 00:03:51,040 --> 00:03:54,240 Speaker 2: it's not a it's not really like a business that 77 00:03:54,280 --> 00:03:57,960 Speaker 2: makes a lot of sense. It's fairfully independent. We work 78 00:03:58,040 --> 00:04:01,880 Speaker 2: with people for more many backgrounds, from artists to writers, 79 00:04:01,880 --> 00:04:07,000 Speaker 2: to musicians, to makers to growers, and it's just a 80 00:04:07,040 --> 00:04:11,280 Speaker 2: really fun project that's sort of full passion and where 81 00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:14,960 Speaker 2: we really get to expect express ourselves creatively in any 82 00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:15,840 Speaker 2: way we. 83 00:04:15,720 --> 00:04:19,560 Speaker 1: Want to m when you're growing up on that farm 84 00:04:19,600 --> 00:04:25,159 Speaker 1: with those dogs that you treated like bloody slaves. Sorry, Tiff, 85 00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:27,880 Speaker 1: I don't want to keep opening that wound. What did 86 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:29,400 Speaker 1: you think you were going to do when you were 87 00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:30,640 Speaker 1: in inverted commas? Big? 88 00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:34,359 Speaker 2: When I was big? What do you mean, like like, 89 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:35,000 Speaker 2: you know, when. 90 00:04:34,880 --> 00:04:36,680 Speaker 1: You're an actual when you were grown up? 91 00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:40,640 Speaker 2: What did you what did you what did you want 92 00:04:40,720 --> 00:04:44,000 Speaker 2: to do? Maybe Well, the only thing I ever wanted 93 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:46,720 Speaker 2: to do from day dot, really from as young as 94 00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:49,520 Speaker 2: I can remember, and it even sort of predates my memory, 95 00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:51,680 Speaker 2: was to become a shift So that starts at h 96 00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:56,080 Speaker 2: five for me. And I'm absolutely certain about that. Why 97 00:04:56,120 --> 00:05:00,240 Speaker 2: I was so certain, I'm not entirely sure. I mean, 98 00:05:00,279 --> 00:05:02,599 Speaker 2: it's definitely growing up around the love of cooking and 99 00:05:02,680 --> 00:05:05,960 Speaker 2: being so so close to primary ingredients and my mother 100 00:05:07,279 --> 00:05:11,000 Speaker 2: making food from our farm and from the land. But 101 00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:13,080 Speaker 2: there was no cooks in my family. It wasn't really 102 00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:14,960 Speaker 2: a thing in the early eighties. It's not like it 103 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:18,960 Speaker 2: is now where people become famous and have large followings, 104 00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:22,480 Speaker 2: and it's just a completely different time. So I guess 105 00:05:22,600 --> 00:05:25,400 Speaker 2: my desire to become a shift this came from a 106 00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:26,320 Speaker 2: pure love of cooking. 107 00:05:28,200 --> 00:05:30,599 Speaker 1: And what is it like to I mean, it's a 108 00:05:30,680 --> 00:05:35,320 Speaker 1: dumb question, but I'm genuinely curious to have to have 109 00:05:35,360 --> 00:05:37,520 Speaker 1: a business that's been called one of the top Well 110 00:05:37,720 --> 00:05:39,600 Speaker 1: is one you and I chat the other day about 111 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:41,919 Speaker 1: how do you even evaluate that? But it is regarded 112 00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:44,000 Speaker 1: as one of the best restaurants or top fifty in 113 00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:46,840 Speaker 1: the world. I don't know how many fucking restaurants there are, 114 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:51,600 Speaker 1: well but let's just go with a shitload. Does that 115 00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:54,600 Speaker 1: make you feel proud or uneasy or like, I'm sure 116 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:57,279 Speaker 1: that's a great achievement or a great accolade at the 117 00:05:57,360 --> 00:06:00,160 Speaker 1: very least, But how does that sit with you? 118 00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:04,440 Speaker 2: It's a very odd thing for me, because you know 119 00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:07,400 Speaker 2: that there's never been the reason for the work. You know, 120 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:10,120 Speaker 2: like I said, the work is about being with an 121 00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:13,000 Speaker 2: incredible team of people and serving an amazing group of 122 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:18,160 Speaker 2: customers and doing this thing with all of your heart 123 00:06:18,200 --> 00:06:21,320 Speaker 2: and mind really, and there's other stuff that kind of 124 00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:24,360 Speaker 2: comes along, these things that other people bestow upon you, 125 00:06:24,520 --> 00:06:27,040 Speaker 2: but also can kind of remove very easily as well. 126 00:06:27,839 --> 00:06:31,119 Speaker 2: It's a bit odd because I've been very careful, Craig 127 00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:34,040 Speaker 2: to sort of never attach an even my personal work 128 00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:37,760 Speaker 2: to these sorts of awards, and at different times I've 129 00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:41,039 Speaker 2: appreciated them, particularly in my early years. But you know, 130 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:43,920 Speaker 2: you win something, if you let that go to your head, 131 00:06:43,920 --> 00:06:45,919 Speaker 2: it'll also destroy you. You know, if you think the 132 00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:50,040 Speaker 2: work's done and that there's effectively there's an awards ceremony, 133 00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:52,640 Speaker 2: you're anointed whatever you are, and then the next day 134 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:56,320 Speaker 2: the work has to begin again. And so pretty early 135 00:06:56,320 --> 00:06:58,440 Speaker 2: on I learned that that wasn't the reason for it. 136 00:06:58,600 --> 00:07:01,360 Speaker 2: I don't know how. It makes me feel just kind 137 00:07:01,360 --> 00:07:04,440 Speaker 2: of odd, Like like we discussed yesterday, you know, how 138 00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:07,359 Speaker 2: can you really say what the top fifty restaurants in 139 00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:11,560 Speaker 2: the world are, Like, that's not really possible, actually, and 140 00:07:11,600 --> 00:07:13,880 Speaker 2: there's a lot of people that that don't get the 141 00:07:13,920 --> 00:07:16,200 Speaker 2: attention that they should for various reasons. 142 00:07:17,120 --> 00:07:18,800 Speaker 1: I think it's quite I don't know if you did 143 00:07:18,800 --> 00:07:23,240 Speaker 1: that accidentally or intentionally or intuitively, but that that thing 144 00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:27,320 Speaker 1: not to attach your self worth or your identity to 145 00:07:27,400 --> 00:07:29,320 Speaker 1: the thing that you're good at, or like, you know, 146 00:07:29,400 --> 00:07:32,360 Speaker 1: to an award or a brand or a that's quite 147 00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:37,160 Speaker 1: smart because my experience is when people have their identity 148 00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:42,160 Speaker 1: intertwined with their accolades or their you know, the status 149 00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:44,720 Speaker 1: of their business or their career, at that point in time, 150 00:07:45,520 --> 00:07:51,160 Speaker 1: when that goes away, they're fucked because you know that 151 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:55,040 Speaker 1: that thing that made them them that isn't there anymore, 152 00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:57,119 Speaker 1: and then they don't know who the fuck they are. 153 00:07:58,000 --> 00:08:00,720 Speaker 2: No, And I couldn't agree more or and it's something 154 00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:02,760 Speaker 2: to be so cautious of. I wrote a line recently 155 00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:05,960 Speaker 2: which I was proud of, which which which which says 156 00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:11,840 Speaker 2: most climbers are killed on the descent. And by that 157 00:08:12,040 --> 00:08:16,080 Speaker 2: I mean you know, actually physically on Everestore or any 158 00:08:16,080 --> 00:08:20,120 Speaker 2: other huge mountain that's you know, you're tied you on 159 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,360 Speaker 2: the way down, that's when it gets to you run 160 00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:25,760 Speaker 2: out of oxygen or the storm overcomes you. But also 161 00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:29,080 Speaker 2: in that sense of like socially climbing or climbing the 162 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:32,840 Speaker 2: ladder of fame and awards and accolades, nobody can ever 163 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:36,320 Speaker 2: stay on top forever. And so if you don't have 164 00:08:36,800 --> 00:08:39,880 Speaker 2: some sort of central values to latch onto and to 165 00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:42,840 Speaker 2: lock onto that, and you don't if you're doing it 166 00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:45,440 Speaker 2: for the wrong reasons, you know, and they can never 167 00:08:45,520 --> 00:08:49,560 Speaker 2: be for fame actually, because that's that's just just fleeting. 168 00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:52,920 Speaker 2: And and if you're not prepared for that to leave you, 169 00:08:53,040 --> 00:08:55,800 Speaker 2: like if you don't understand it, that's just temporary or 170 00:08:55,800 --> 00:08:58,280 Speaker 2: not even real, and you're going to get really lost 171 00:08:58,440 --> 00:08:59,160 Speaker 2: when that goes. 172 00:09:00,120 --> 00:09:03,800 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so interesting. I wrote a book years ago, 173 00:09:04,960 --> 00:09:06,920 Speaker 1: I don't know, fifteen years ago, one of my books, 174 00:09:06,960 --> 00:09:11,880 Speaker 1: and in this I have this pretend conversation with this dude, 175 00:09:12,160 --> 00:09:16,360 Speaker 1: which was really a reflection of many actual conversations. But 176 00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:20,040 Speaker 1: it goes something like, so I sit down with a client, 177 00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:22,640 Speaker 1: which I used to I used to own gyms and stuff, 178 00:09:22,679 --> 00:09:24,760 Speaker 1: which you know, And I'd sit down with people who'd 179 00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:27,720 Speaker 1: come in because they want to, you know, change their body, 180 00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:31,080 Speaker 1: their mindset, habits, behavior's outcome, health, blah blah blah blah blah. 181 00:09:31,120 --> 00:09:33,960 Speaker 1: And I'd go, so, tell me about you, and then 182 00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:37,640 Speaker 1: they'd tell me about their business, or then that'd tell 183 00:09:37,679 --> 00:09:39,959 Speaker 1: me about their brand, or then they'd tell me about 184 00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:44,000 Speaker 1: their address where they live. Then that tell me about 185 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:47,800 Speaker 1: their kids or that. I go, yeah, cool, that's all good. 186 00:09:47,840 --> 00:09:50,720 Speaker 1: But none of that is you tell me about you. 187 00:09:50,760 --> 00:09:52,840 Speaker 1: Don't tell me about where you live, or what you drive, 188 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:54,440 Speaker 1: or what you own, or what you earn, or what 189 00:09:54,480 --> 00:09:57,760 Speaker 1: your job is or where tell me about you. They 190 00:09:57,760 --> 00:09:59,800 Speaker 1: don't know what the fuck to say because they don't 191 00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:04,440 Speaker 1: know who they are beyond all those identifiers. You know. Yeah, 192 00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:08,040 Speaker 1: it's a philosophical kind of question, isn't it. It is? 193 00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:09,880 Speaker 2: And I imagine for a lot of people it's very 194 00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:13,640 Speaker 2: hard to answer. But for me personally, you know, my wealth, 195 00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:17,480 Speaker 2: you know, my personal wealth is never like as a human, 196 00:10:17,679 --> 00:10:20,640 Speaker 2: is not attached to what I do at the restaurant. 197 00:10:20,679 --> 00:10:23,280 Speaker 2: I think I can apply my creativity to other things 198 00:10:23,920 --> 00:10:26,880 Speaker 2: like renovating a house, for example, which I've done multiple times, 199 00:10:26,920 --> 00:10:30,680 Speaker 2: or skateboarding. And I've often said that this thing that 200 00:10:30,720 --> 00:10:33,280 Speaker 2: I love doing, which is running this restaurant and with 201 00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:37,800 Speaker 2: these amazing people, that I never let that die. You 202 00:10:37,840 --> 00:10:41,320 Speaker 2: know that I work to protect that. But when the feeling, 203 00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:46,120 Speaker 2: the euphoria from creating new things at the restaurant is gone, 204 00:10:46,559 --> 00:10:48,440 Speaker 2: I will stop doing it and I will look to 205 00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:52,480 Speaker 2: do something else. So yeah, I just think that, you know, 206 00:10:53,840 --> 00:10:56,800 Speaker 2: it's just a folly to link yourself to your occupation 207 00:10:57,320 --> 00:10:59,280 Speaker 2: too much. Try to limit yourself even in that way. 208 00:10:59,360 --> 00:11:01,840 Speaker 2: I don't think you can really grow if you're not 209 00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:02,960 Speaker 2: really thinking about who you are. 210 00:11:05,120 --> 00:11:08,320 Speaker 1: Do you run the restaurant yourself? Like, are you the 211 00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:10,559 Speaker 1: are you the day to day boss? 212 00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:16,040 Speaker 2: Yes? One of them? Yep, I'm the director, I guess. 213 00:11:16,160 --> 00:11:18,240 Speaker 2: I run it with my wife Kylie, so we co 214 00:11:18,320 --> 00:11:20,360 Speaker 2: run it. But we also have quite a big team. 215 00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:23,920 Speaker 2: We have forty employees, we have you know, a hitd chef, 216 00:11:23,960 --> 00:11:27,080 Speaker 2: we have a restaurant manager, we have more junior people, 217 00:11:27,480 --> 00:11:30,360 Speaker 2: and so there's a good group of us running it actually, 218 00:11:30,360 --> 00:11:32,600 Speaker 2: But yes, I am their day to day pretty much 219 00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:36,360 Speaker 2: every day. Still, it's down nineteenth year this year. So yeah, 220 00:11:36,400 --> 00:11:37,160 Speaker 2: you've got to love it. 221 00:11:37,200 --> 00:11:43,080 Speaker 1: You know, what's your what's your take on leadership? Because 222 00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:46,880 Speaker 1: I mean you got forty people, there's forty personalities, forty humans, 223 00:11:46,920 --> 00:11:54,200 Speaker 1: forty backstories, forty expectations, you know, psychology, physiology, emotions, sociology. 224 00:11:54,840 --> 00:11:57,880 Speaker 1: What's your take on leadership and how do you do it? 225 00:11:59,040 --> 00:12:01,520 Speaker 2: Well? You know, I'll be honest with you. In the 226 00:12:01,559 --> 00:12:03,360 Speaker 2: early days, you know, I started to attic here when 227 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:06,480 Speaker 2: I was twenty seven, and I was a completely useless leader. 228 00:12:06,720 --> 00:12:08,520 Speaker 2: You know, I don't know how to I don't know 229 00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:12,200 Speaker 2: how to support people or prop people up or you know, 230 00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:15,160 Speaker 2: give them any kind of feedback, and so like I 231 00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:18,520 Speaker 2: really failed those early teams, you know. But there's something 232 00:12:18,559 --> 00:12:22,400 Speaker 2: that I absolutely linked becoming a great leader of something 233 00:12:22,440 --> 00:12:25,600 Speaker 2: I linked to I guess, the overall performance of the 234 00:12:25,679 --> 00:12:27,880 Speaker 2: business and not just the performance, but the well being 235 00:12:27,880 --> 00:12:30,720 Speaker 2: of the people there too. So in the last decade 236 00:12:30,840 --> 00:12:33,720 Speaker 2: OR worked really hard and one of the things on leadership, 237 00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:35,920 Speaker 2: but one of the things that I rise over everything 238 00:12:35,960 --> 00:12:41,680 Speaker 2: else is directness, respectful directness. Just tell people what you 239 00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:43,840 Speaker 2: need and what you think, do it in a way 240 00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:46,400 Speaker 2: that doesn't hurt them. Do it in a way that 241 00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:50,800 Speaker 2: they know that you've got their personal growth in mind 242 00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:55,559 Speaker 2: and that what you're saying is more than benefiting the business, 243 00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:59,520 Speaker 2: but benefiting them long term too. So I really acutely 244 00:12:59,559 --> 00:13:03,560 Speaker 2: disliked bullshit. So I will kind of sort of leader 245 00:13:03,559 --> 00:13:06,280 Speaker 2: that will work through the business to kind of eliminate 246 00:13:06,360 --> 00:13:08,800 Speaker 2: any anything that I think is bullshit that we're doing 247 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:12,120 Speaker 2: and not direct because I want to kind of be 248 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:14,760 Speaker 2: as direct as I can with our customers in our 249 00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:19,360 Speaker 2: expression as well creatively. And there's a variety of things 250 00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:22,360 Speaker 2: and unusual kind of ways we go about bringing this 251 00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:26,400 Speaker 2: team together. But I always believe very very strongly that 252 00:13:26,480 --> 00:13:30,680 Speaker 2: empathy is the oldest sibling of performance. So we need 253 00:13:30,720 --> 00:13:35,640 Speaker 2: to have an empathetic workplace. That's not to say that 254 00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:38,360 Speaker 2: that stuff doesn't happen, or things don't go wrong, or 255 00:13:38,480 --> 00:13:41,080 Speaker 2: sometimes people might have an argument or dislike each other. 256 00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:44,040 Speaker 2: That's just human nature. But I guess I'm really talking 257 00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:49,880 Speaker 2: about eliminating toxic negativity, you know, And so I'm pretty 258 00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:53,320 Speaker 2: strict on that. Like, you know, whatever's going on in 259 00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:56,600 Speaker 2: your life, you know, you need to still come to 260 00:13:56,679 --> 00:14:00,000 Speaker 2: work with a super positive attitude. Now, if you can't, 261 00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,520 Speaker 2: of course, we're going to support you and look after 262 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:07,760 Speaker 2: you and try to help you. But really like your 263 00:14:08,360 --> 00:14:12,960 Speaker 2: personal mental health and your well being in an environment, 264 00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:15,880 Speaker 2: in a job where it's fair, that you're properly paid, 265 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:21,040 Speaker 2: that you're not getting bullied or harassed. It's your responsibility 266 00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:23,560 Speaker 2: if those things are straight, you know, And and that 267 00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:25,680 Speaker 2: begins and ends with me as well. Right, So I 268 00:14:25,720 --> 00:14:28,080 Speaker 2: can't come to work in a shitty mood with a 269 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:31,960 Speaker 2: shitty attitude, because I'm asking my team to come to 270 00:14:32,040 --> 00:14:34,440 Speaker 2: work with a great attitude and to bring it every day. 271 00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:38,840 Speaker 2: So no, really, I think the leader has absolutely got 272 00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:40,600 Speaker 2: to live what they're breaching. 273 00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:48,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so interesting. It's I employed con what did 274 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:50,480 Speaker 1: I employ about five hundred people over the years in 275 00:14:50,480 --> 00:14:53,200 Speaker 1: my gyms, and it was a constant juggling act of 276 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:58,720 Speaker 1: psychology and sociology and practicality and trying to create that 277 00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:01,400 Speaker 1: trying to create a place where people want to be 278 00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:04,760 Speaker 1: ben You know, I do lots of corporate speaking now, 279 00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:07,640 Speaker 1: and one of the things I ask bosses, managers' leaders 280 00:15:07,720 --> 00:15:10,600 Speaker 1: is do people want to be in this place? Do 281 00:15:10,840 --> 00:15:13,720 Speaker 1: people like coming here? I know there's a lot of 282 00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:16,440 Speaker 1: other questions after that, but if the answer to that 283 00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:18,560 Speaker 1: question is no, you've fucked. 284 00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:21,040 Speaker 2: So I could not agree more great. 285 00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:24,160 Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. It's like people. It doesn't 286 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:26,200 Speaker 1: mean you've got to be their best friend, but if 287 00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:29,200 Speaker 1: they don't kind of like you or respect you, that's tough. 288 00:15:29,240 --> 00:15:31,840 Speaker 1: And then if you've got a place of culture and 289 00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:35,520 Speaker 1: environment that people don't want to be in, fack, there's 290 00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:38,880 Speaker 1: lots of work to do. So yeah, and it's again 291 00:15:39,280 --> 00:15:43,440 Speaker 1: with different because you can say one thing to Sally 292 00:15:43,480 --> 00:15:46,240 Speaker 1: and she's cool, you say the same thing to Tiffany 293 00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:54,800 Speaker 1: because she's high maintenance and oh sorry, tif oh you 294 00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:58,320 Speaker 1: know it's not gonna it's not going to work. And 295 00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:01,760 Speaker 1: so you've got to navigate this myriad of complex kind 296 00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:07,560 Speaker 1: of social interactions as well as being tough and strong. 297 00:16:07,720 --> 00:16:10,239 Speaker 1: That's a real jug, yeah, actor. 298 00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:13,200 Speaker 2: It really is. And I think, you know, I think 299 00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:15,080 Speaker 2: the main thing that people are listening here and wanting 300 00:16:15,080 --> 00:16:18,000 Speaker 2: to be better leaders and better in business, the main 301 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:21,160 Speaker 2: thing I would say is to is to actually just 302 00:16:21,360 --> 00:16:24,680 Speaker 2: try try to improve yourself, try to improve your leadership 303 00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:27,600 Speaker 2: and do it incrementally. But it's pretty easy to think, 304 00:16:27,640 --> 00:16:29,120 Speaker 2: you know what, I'm a really shitty leader and I've 305 00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:31,640 Speaker 2: got no hope. But I would say, just try to 306 00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:34,440 Speaker 2: change a small thing one percent every day perhaps about 307 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,760 Speaker 2: what you're doing, and over time and pretty quickly you 308 00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:41,560 Speaker 2: will realize that you've kind of revolutionized the culture. To 309 00:16:41,600 --> 00:16:44,840 Speaker 2: your point about the psychology of workplaces, I mean, my wife, Kylie, 310 00:16:44,840 --> 00:16:48,280 Speaker 2: who's really responsible so much for the success of our business. 311 00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:51,800 Speaker 2: She's three quarters of the way through a psychology degree 312 00:16:51,840 --> 00:16:55,600 Speaker 2: in no small part to basically deal with exactly what 313 00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:58,000 Speaker 2: you're saying. You know, humans are complicated in our once 314 00:16:58,040 --> 00:17:00,240 Speaker 2: and our needs and our desires and our emotion and 315 00:17:00,360 --> 00:17:03,480 Speaker 2: ups and downs, you know, and that's never going away, 316 00:17:03,720 --> 00:17:06,160 Speaker 2: no matter how the team you've got, no matter who 317 00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:09,040 Speaker 2: you select, that's always going to kind of be a constant. 318 00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:11,960 Speaker 2: But I would say that there's a rule that I 319 00:17:12,040 --> 00:17:15,159 Speaker 2: kind of apply and I think it's helpful. And I 320 00:17:15,240 --> 00:17:19,000 Speaker 2: learned this through coaching youth basketball through my son's team. 321 00:17:19,359 --> 00:17:22,720 Speaker 2: But I say, the low's never too low and the 322 00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:25,600 Speaker 2: high is never too high. And by that I mean 323 00:17:25,640 --> 00:17:27,720 Speaker 2: if you just kind of come through the middle as 324 00:17:27,720 --> 00:17:31,240 Speaker 2: a leader and you don't overreact when there's a low 325 00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:33,600 Speaker 2: point in the business or something goes wrong, and if 326 00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:36,480 Speaker 2: you don't over celebrate something that you've done really well, 327 00:17:36,480 --> 00:17:39,600 Speaker 2: like just kind of keep it in the middle. I 328 00:17:39,640 --> 00:17:42,080 Speaker 2: think there's sort of a security in people for that, 329 00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:45,639 Speaker 2: you know, like with your team, that the leaders not 330 00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:50,120 Speaker 2: over celebrating the winds and not and not doubling down 331 00:17:50,119 --> 00:17:52,760 Speaker 2: and going super aggressive when things go wrong, because they 332 00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:54,920 Speaker 2: will go wrong, and they go wrong in every business. 333 00:17:55,560 --> 00:17:58,439 Speaker 2: And I think the other thing is is from the 334 00:17:58,440 --> 00:18:02,560 Speaker 2: outside people look in it, a successful organization can go well, 335 00:18:02,640 --> 00:18:05,680 Speaker 2: everything must just be perfectly every day, And the reality 336 00:18:05,720 --> 00:18:09,320 Speaker 2: is nothing is further from the truth. And every successful 337 00:18:09,400 --> 00:18:14,359 Speaker 2: organization is really finding the same problems as any as 338 00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:16,960 Speaker 2: any other one. And the reality is it's just sort 339 00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:18,679 Speaker 2: of how you deal with those problems and who you 340 00:18:18,760 --> 00:18:23,159 Speaker 2: deal with them with. And also think just lastly, you know, 341 00:18:23,359 --> 00:18:26,280 Speaker 2: not not repeating those same mistakes as a pretty big 342 00:18:26,280 --> 00:18:29,399 Speaker 2: one on leadership. You know, if something goes wrong, analyze 343 00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:31,200 Speaker 2: it and you go, you know what, I'm not going 344 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:34,119 Speaker 2: to end up back there because that sucked for everybody. 345 00:18:34,920 --> 00:18:39,879 Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, I read a book years ago which you 346 00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:42,560 Speaker 1: you're way younger than me, which is fucking annoying. But anyway, 347 00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:45,359 Speaker 1: so called the myth. Have you ever heard of that book? 348 00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:53,359 Speaker 1: I have not known? Buck Off all right, anyway. Now 349 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:56,840 Speaker 1: it came out the same time as the Bible anyway, 350 00:18:57,600 --> 00:19:01,800 Speaker 1: so wow, the Old Testament New Testament was proceeded the 351 00:19:01,840 --> 00:19:05,160 Speaker 1: New Testament. But anyway, a guy called Gerber wrote that, 352 00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:07,880 Speaker 1: Michael Gerber, I think it was. And the e myth 353 00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:11,199 Speaker 1: is about this idea, Mike Ben that you've got to 354 00:19:11,240 --> 00:19:15,840 Speaker 1: work on the business. Not you've got to work in 355 00:19:15,880 --> 00:19:18,399 Speaker 1: the business, but to be able to build it and 356 00:19:18,440 --> 00:19:21,000 Speaker 1: develop it, you've got to be able to step awongeally. 357 00:19:21,040 --> 00:19:23,080 Speaker 1: It's hard to be objective about the thing that you're 358 00:19:23,119 --> 00:19:26,879 Speaker 1: in the middle of. And you know, I've always immersed 359 00:19:26,920 --> 00:19:31,000 Speaker 1: in my business, which sometimes gives me a really good, visceral, 360 00:19:31,119 --> 00:19:35,200 Speaker 1: subjective experience of what's going on. But it's only when 361 00:19:35,200 --> 00:19:38,080 Speaker 1: I step back into the macro and out of the 362 00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:41,200 Speaker 1: micro that I can kind of have that bigger picture vision. 363 00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:46,800 Speaker 1: My clumsy, long winded, fucking question is, in terms of 364 00:19:46,960 --> 00:19:49,960 Speaker 1: your career and Attica and all the things that you do, 365 00:19:50,840 --> 00:19:53,800 Speaker 1: how much of that is kind of big picture planning, 366 00:19:53,960 --> 00:19:58,720 Speaker 1: macro strategic, long term timeline projection, and how much is 367 00:19:58,760 --> 00:20:01,919 Speaker 1: you just in the middle of it being instinctive and intuitive. 368 00:20:03,160 --> 00:20:07,000 Speaker 2: It's probably ninety nine percent of me just being in 369 00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:09,600 Speaker 2: the middle of it, living in the moment, knowing and 370 00:20:09,680 --> 00:20:13,399 Speaker 2: kind of understanding that the moment, like right now, I'm 371 00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:15,320 Speaker 2: You're the only thing I can focus on right now, 372 00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:19,560 Speaker 2: this conversation, this interview. I'm not worried about what's happening 373 00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:22,520 Speaker 2: after this. That's really kind of how I go. I 374 00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:24,800 Speaker 2: really really want to ring the most out of my 375 00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:28,760 Speaker 2: life that I can, and I've found by absolutely focusing 376 00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:32,480 Speaker 2: on every day and just living it to the fullest 377 00:20:32,520 --> 00:20:33,879 Speaker 2: and trying to get the most out of it that 378 00:20:33,920 --> 00:20:37,359 Speaker 2: I've been a lot happier. I'm not a great forward planner, 379 00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:40,560 Speaker 2: and I'm not really tremendous at reflecting on the past either, 380 00:20:40,720 --> 00:20:43,680 Speaker 2: because I've always kind of wanted to evolve. But I'm 381 00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:46,080 Speaker 2: fortunate in our business that I do have other people 382 00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:49,119 Speaker 2: who are making those longer term plans. But for me, 383 00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:52,040 Speaker 2: a long term plan is a month. You know, I 384 00:20:52,119 --> 00:20:55,120 Speaker 2: kind of don't want to talk about, like, unless it's 385 00:20:55,119 --> 00:20:58,520 Speaker 2: something that's obviously like critical, I don't really want to 386 00:20:58,520 --> 00:20:59,800 Speaker 2: talk about it, you know. I kin't want to talk 387 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:01,960 Speaker 2: about what are we going to do today again kind 388 00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:03,000 Speaker 2: of idea. You know. 389 00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:08,159 Speaker 1: Yeah, So here's a philosophical question to feel free to 390 00:21:08,240 --> 00:21:10,000 Speaker 1: jump in. I feel like you might have a question 391 00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:14,040 Speaker 1: for the great man. My research is around this thing 392 00:21:14,119 --> 00:21:15,480 Speaker 1: I don't know if I mentioned to you when we 393 00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:19,760 Speaker 1: chatted the other day called metapception, which is essentially your 394 00:21:19,840 --> 00:21:24,720 Speaker 1: ability to understand the Ben experience for others. So the 395 00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:26,879 Speaker 1: question at the core of my research is what's it 396 00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:29,399 Speaker 1: like being around me for the rest of the world, 397 00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:34,000 Speaker 1: but my wife, for my kids, for my team, for strangers, 398 00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:37,280 Speaker 1: for my customers. What do you think the Ben experience 399 00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:38,639 Speaker 1: is like for others? 400 00:21:39,240 --> 00:21:41,840 Speaker 2: What a fascinating thing to study. Great I think that's 401 00:21:42,160 --> 00:21:46,680 Speaker 2: amazing that you've done that, because I think so few 402 00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:50,960 Speaker 2: leaders actually think about how they're affecting other people, either 403 00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:53,840 Speaker 2: positively or negatively, and I think we all, to some 404 00:21:53,960 --> 00:22:00,080 Speaker 2: degree affect other people positively negatively. I'm acutely aware of 405 00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:04,040 Speaker 2: of my influence over my team and of others, and 406 00:22:04,359 --> 00:22:07,120 Speaker 2: that's why I do call myself a leader for my industry, 407 00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:11,840 Speaker 2: because I think that especially chef's chefs will do anything 408 00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:15,320 Speaker 2: for each other. We are mad generally, right, like, we 409 00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:18,440 Speaker 2: have a history of working insane hours and being put through, 410 00:22:19,440 --> 00:22:22,399 Speaker 2: you know, various forms of kind of torture by our 411 00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:26,600 Speaker 2: industry and by our employees historically, and so I'm acutely 412 00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:29,000 Speaker 2: aware of that history and also of my own personal 413 00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:33,320 Speaker 2: history about how I've I've gone through that too. At 414 00:22:33,320 --> 00:22:36,200 Speaker 2: the age of forty, I'd already worked the retirement age. 415 00:22:36,720 --> 00:22:39,359 Speaker 2: I'd already worked the amount of hours that are somebody 416 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:42,800 Speaker 2: retiring at sixty five had, you know, And I did 417 00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:45,240 Speaker 2: reflect upon that. You know, I probably didn't think that 418 00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:47,320 Speaker 2: was that well, that's great, you know, certainly it wasn't 419 00:22:47,359 --> 00:22:51,320 Speaker 2: paid for them, and so that obviously makes you think 420 00:22:51,320 --> 00:22:54,919 Speaker 2: about your own, your staff's experience, but also just of 421 00:22:54,960 --> 00:22:57,520 Speaker 2: your influence on them. So what I'm kind of what 422 00:22:57,600 --> 00:22:59,159 Speaker 2: I'm kind of trying to say to you, is that 423 00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:03,280 Speaker 2: I am really mindful of my own ambition with my 424 00:23:03,359 --> 00:23:07,640 Speaker 2: employees because there are times literally if I asked them 425 00:23:07,680 --> 00:23:09,760 Speaker 2: to walk up a cliff with me, they probably would, 426 00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:13,119 Speaker 2: you know. So I need to be self aware in 427 00:23:13,160 --> 00:23:17,760 Speaker 2: that way. There's little things that I do, I suppose 428 00:23:18,160 --> 00:23:21,000 Speaker 2: and little rules that kind of I personally have with 429 00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:23,440 Speaker 2: the staff. And one of them is very simple, and 430 00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:26,680 Speaker 2: I think it's it's not an exceptional rule, but it's 431 00:23:26,840 --> 00:23:30,439 Speaker 2: just say say hello, how are you to every single 432 00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:35,480 Speaker 2: person in the building every single day. Yeah, and so, 433 00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:39,840 Speaker 2: and not in a formulatic way, not going around hi, no, 434 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:43,920 Speaker 2: actually genuinely just take thirty seconds, so just ask hey, 435 00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:46,200 Speaker 2: how are you? And you know, occasionally somebody will say, 436 00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:51,120 Speaker 2: you know what, I'm not great, and I'll say, well, hey, 437 00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:54,480 Speaker 2: you know what's going on? You know, and now they 438 00:23:54,520 --> 00:23:56,320 Speaker 2: may tell me or they may say, no, I'm going 439 00:23:56,400 --> 00:23:57,879 Speaker 2: to be all right. I'm just I'm just having a 440 00:23:57,880 --> 00:23:59,800 Speaker 2: bit of a day. But I've got my you know, 441 00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:03,040 Speaker 2: I focus on the job and other times, you know, 442 00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:06,439 Speaker 2: we'll have a coffee and we'll chat about it, you know, 443 00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:09,440 Speaker 2: because I guess I'm one of the older members of 444 00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:12,800 Speaker 2: the team, you know, I've been through most of the 445 00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:16,920 Speaker 2: struggles that that people go through. Yeah, so i'd really 446 00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:18,360 Speaker 2: try to be aware. I don't think you can ever 447 00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:21,640 Speaker 2: be fully completely aware of how you are. But one 448 00:24:21,640 --> 00:24:25,680 Speaker 2: thing I strive not to be is ever harsh, because 449 00:24:25,720 --> 00:24:28,080 Speaker 2: I think you can really crush somebody, particularly somebody that 450 00:24:28,119 --> 00:24:30,560 Speaker 2: looks up to you, just by talking to them the 451 00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:33,760 Speaker 2: wrong way. And so if I ever do that, which 452 00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:36,400 Speaker 2: is very rare, and I can think of an example 453 00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:39,760 Speaker 2: in the last three years where I was actually doing 454 00:24:39,800 --> 00:24:41,520 Speaker 2: an interview, but like this in the office, and a 455 00:24:41,600 --> 00:24:44,040 Speaker 2: young chef is a really lovely person, came into the office, 456 00:24:44,080 --> 00:24:46,479 Speaker 2: came in behind me, and he sort of just started 457 00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:50,920 Speaker 2: talking to me over my shoulder and ask me questions, 458 00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:54,399 Speaker 2: and I said, can you just just give me a second, 459 00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:56,919 Speaker 2: you know, And I was just kind of like frustrated 460 00:24:56,960 --> 00:25:01,080 Speaker 2: and a bit annoyed, but he's he's such a genuinely 461 00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:05,359 Speaker 2: beautiful person, and so I huffed at him a little 462 00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:08,240 Speaker 2: bit and I said, oh god, you know, that would 463 00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:10,639 Speaker 2: have bloody crushed him a bit, you know. So a 464 00:25:10,680 --> 00:25:12,560 Speaker 2: couple of hours later, or an hour later, after I 465 00:25:12,560 --> 00:25:14,439 Speaker 2: finished that call, I went in and I said, hey, listen, 466 00:25:15,040 --> 00:25:18,200 Speaker 2: I'm really sorry about that. And he said, oh, no, no, 467 00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:20,159 Speaker 2: there was nothing to be sorry about. I shouldn't approach it. 468 00:25:20,160 --> 00:25:22,760 Speaker 2: And I said, no, no, I didn't live up to 469 00:25:22,800 --> 00:25:25,400 Speaker 2: my own expectations. You're a really great person. I'm really 470 00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:29,119 Speaker 2: sorry about that. And he sort of beamed, you know, 471 00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:31,159 Speaker 2: and we both knew that was the truth. 472 00:25:31,600 --> 00:25:35,359 Speaker 1: You know, that's amazing, well one mate, and I'm not 473 00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:39,359 Speaker 1: pissing in your pocket. That's amazing awareness, situational self awareness 474 00:25:39,920 --> 00:25:45,560 Speaker 1: and also social intelligence to know that that's the right 475 00:25:45,600 --> 00:25:49,800 Speaker 1: thing to do, and humility to be able to go no, mate, 476 00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:53,239 Speaker 1: I'm the problem. Like that's so. I listened to this 477 00:25:53,320 --> 00:25:55,920 Speaker 1: podcast the other day and there were these two two 478 00:25:55,960 --> 00:26:00,480 Speaker 1: people talking and they said this. One of them said 479 00:26:00,480 --> 00:26:03,239 Speaker 1: this interesting thing. This so I forget this psychologist. And 480 00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:07,280 Speaker 1: she said something like, for all of the problems that 481 00:26:07,320 --> 00:26:09,520 Speaker 1: you have in your life, you're there for a one 482 00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:16,080 Speaker 1: hundred percent of them. That's incredible, right, And also for 483 00:26:16,200 --> 00:26:20,879 Speaker 1: all the dysfunctional relationships and problems in relationships you've had, 484 00:26:21,119 --> 00:26:23,120 Speaker 1: you're the only common denominator. 485 00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:25,000 Speaker 2: Right, Oh my goodness. 486 00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:28,680 Speaker 1: Now that's not to say, that's not to say that 487 00:26:28,680 --> 00:26:32,439 Speaker 1: that person's always the problem, but it's like, it's funny 488 00:26:32,480 --> 00:26:34,840 Speaker 1: how when people talk about shit, they really go, ah, 489 00:26:34,920 --> 00:26:37,640 Speaker 1: this is going on in my life with this bloody Ben. 490 00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:40,840 Speaker 1: Me and Ben. And by the way, I'm the problem. 491 00:26:41,040 --> 00:26:43,600 Speaker 2: Nobody says that no. No. 492 00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:47,679 Speaker 1: So that awareness, that awareness that you had to go no, 493 00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:52,320 Speaker 1: made one hundred percent me And that's great and rare. 494 00:26:53,560 --> 00:26:55,600 Speaker 2: Thank you. Well, you know, I think the bucks has 495 00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:58,720 Speaker 2: stop with me ultimately, you know, if we succeed or fail, 496 00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:00,679 Speaker 2: it's come and going to be on me. You know. 497 00:27:01,359 --> 00:27:05,280 Speaker 2: I've had some really great teachers in that way though, too, 498 00:27:05,320 --> 00:27:09,119 Speaker 2: and I'll give you this example of this friend, Miriam, 499 00:27:09,640 --> 00:27:12,800 Speaker 2: who we were having this conversation. She's from South Sudan 500 00:27:13,040 --> 00:27:15,520 Speaker 2: and we're having this conversation at her place once about 501 00:27:15,560 --> 00:27:18,600 Speaker 2: this guy that had kind of come in to her 502 00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:21,679 Speaker 2: garden and just sort of started ranting about how terrible 503 00:27:21,720 --> 00:27:23,760 Speaker 2: the garden was, and we were having a bit of 504 00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:26,000 Speaker 2: a laugh about it, and she was saying that being 505 00:27:26,040 --> 00:27:28,520 Speaker 2: negative is a full time job, and she was joking 506 00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:30,680 Speaker 2: about how his realist person was really putting it back 507 00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:32,879 Speaker 2: into it. You know, I really committed to it, like 508 00:27:35,640 --> 00:27:39,959 Speaker 2: and I like to have kind of examples of people, 509 00:27:40,280 --> 00:27:44,520 Speaker 2: you know, who find kind of culpability their own culpability 510 00:27:44,560 --> 00:27:49,359 Speaker 2: and kind of almost any situation. And for Miriam, you know, 511 00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:56,000 Speaker 2: had been this experience of racism that was so pervasive 512 00:27:56,040 --> 00:27:59,399 Speaker 2: when when there was this rhetoric in the media about 513 00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:05,040 Speaker 2: African games, and she is a migrant, and she said, well, 514 00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:09,159 Speaker 2: what could I do about this, you know? And she 515 00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:12,840 Speaker 2: decided that she could educate people, that she could bring 516 00:28:12,880 --> 00:28:15,920 Speaker 2: people into a home and teach her about her culture. 517 00:28:15,960 --> 00:28:19,119 Speaker 2: And I said, oh my god, you're being subjected to 518 00:28:19,119 --> 00:28:26,440 Speaker 2: this horrible, horrible racist trope, and yet you are going 519 00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:29,600 Speaker 2: I'm going to try to find some small solution about it. 520 00:28:29,640 --> 00:28:33,879 Speaker 2: I'm like, well, what example, what could I possibly have 521 00:28:34,119 --> 00:28:38,280 Speaker 2: to stop me from not finding some culpability in any 522 00:28:38,360 --> 00:28:40,400 Speaker 2: kind of aspect of my life. I think, you know, 523 00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:43,560 Speaker 2: we're seldom ever completely innocent. I would say that she 524 00:28:43,840 --> 00:28:46,600 Speaker 2: was completely innocent, but yeah, she is like, well I 525 00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:48,000 Speaker 2: need to do something about it, you know. 526 00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:51,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's amazing. It is amazing, and it is it's 527 00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:55,040 Speaker 1: so easy to be all about problems, and it's so 528 00:28:55,080 --> 00:28:58,600 Speaker 1: easy to be all about blame and transference and avoidance. 529 00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:02,080 Speaker 1: But to be able to go you know, it's like 530 00:29:02,280 --> 00:29:05,600 Speaker 1: when I talk about which people get uncomfortable with. But 531 00:29:05,640 --> 00:29:08,880 Speaker 1: I was a morbidly obese kid, right I was. I 532 00:29:08,920 --> 00:29:11,160 Speaker 1: was over I was like ninety five kilos when I 533 00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:13,600 Speaker 1: was fourteen. I'm eighty five kilos now, and I was 534 00:29:13,640 --> 00:29:16,040 Speaker 1: six inches shorter and my name at school was Jumbo 535 00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:19,320 Speaker 1: and all this stuff. Right, But yeah, but I talk 536 00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:22,840 Speaker 1: about like I created that. You know. It's like and yeah, 537 00:29:22,880 --> 00:29:25,200 Speaker 1: I was a kid, but I ate my way into that, 538 00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:31,960 Speaker 1: and at some stage I needed to take responsibility and go, well, look, 539 00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:35,600 Speaker 1: nobody's making me sit on the couch, nobody's making me 540 00:29:35,680 --> 00:29:38,080 Speaker 1: eat all the fucking cake that I love nobody's you know, 541 00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:42,239 Speaker 1: and that being being able to be self aware and 542 00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:46,320 Speaker 1: responsible without the self loathing bend. You know, I think 543 00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:49,920 Speaker 1: where you're you're just taking ownership without beating yourself up. 544 00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:53,720 Speaker 1: There's a big there's a big space between I could 545 00:29:53,760 --> 00:29:56,920 Speaker 1: do better and I'm a fucking idiot. I always get 546 00:29:56,920 --> 00:29:58,560 Speaker 1: this wrong, you know, there's. 547 00:29:58,400 --> 00:30:02,480 Speaker 2: A big space. Old line thinking is hard. Blaming as easy, 548 00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:05,400 Speaker 2: isn't it, you know, And I mean that's a you know, 549 00:30:05,480 --> 00:30:08,400 Speaker 2: that's a profound personal experience that you've had as well, Craig. 550 00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:11,000 Speaker 2: You know, that's that I can I can relate to 551 00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:13,320 Speaker 2: that on some levels. You know. It was also an 552 00:30:13,360 --> 00:30:16,280 Speaker 2: overweight teenager. You know, it was at one hundred and 553 00:30:16,320 --> 00:30:19,200 Speaker 2: three kilos at one point, and you know, I went 554 00:30:19,240 --> 00:30:21,760 Speaker 2: down into the late seventies and now I'm at about 555 00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:25,040 Speaker 2: age six, and you know, I think also, like for men, 556 00:30:25,120 --> 00:30:28,160 Speaker 2: it's not like something that it's easy to talk about 557 00:30:28,200 --> 00:30:30,560 Speaker 2: our weight or our body image, e the you know, 558 00:30:30,800 --> 00:30:32,360 Speaker 2: something that I've kind of had to come to terms 559 00:30:32,360 --> 00:30:34,480 Speaker 2: with in the last couple of years. I've always struggled 560 00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:34,760 Speaker 2: with it. 561 00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:35,440 Speaker 1: So I really. 562 00:30:35,280 --> 00:30:38,480 Speaker 2: Sympathized with you, you know, and understand where you're coming from. 563 00:30:39,080 --> 00:30:41,600 Speaker 1: Well, I grew up very much with digressing, but fuck it, 564 00:30:41,680 --> 00:30:44,120 Speaker 1: this is where we're going. Like, I grew up very 565 00:30:44,240 --> 00:30:48,360 Speaker 1: much identifying with my body, you know, and I thought 566 00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:50,760 Speaker 1: because I was, you know, that was my name. My 567 00:30:50,840 --> 00:30:55,040 Speaker 1: name was my jumbo and you know all that stuff 568 00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:58,120 Speaker 1: which my listeners have heard too many times. But you know, 569 00:30:58,240 --> 00:31:00,640 Speaker 1: being picked last for sporting teams and all those things 570 00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:03,320 Speaker 1: that come with being unathletic and unfit and fat, and 571 00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:06,200 Speaker 1: you know, and the social stuff and the emotional stuff 572 00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:10,080 Speaker 1: and the physiological stuff and the practical stuff, and then 573 00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:12,560 Speaker 1: it's hard when you Then I got in shape, like you, 574 00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:17,040 Speaker 1: very fit, very strong, very lean, started to become, probably 575 00:31:17,080 --> 00:31:20,280 Speaker 1: in an unhealthy way, obsessive and all that shit. But 576 00:31:20,440 --> 00:31:26,560 Speaker 1: then then I really started to identify myself capital s 577 00:31:26,560 --> 00:31:30,440 Speaker 1: self with my body, and they became indistinguishable. Where I 578 00:31:30,480 --> 00:31:34,080 Speaker 1: went well and if I looked good, I felt better, 579 00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:37,080 Speaker 1: and if I look put on two kilos, I felt shit. 580 00:31:37,720 --> 00:31:41,280 Speaker 1: And if someone complimented my appearance, I felt good. And 581 00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:44,160 Speaker 1: so I was always seeking approval and love and connection 582 00:31:44,280 --> 00:31:48,040 Speaker 1: and validation through this thing that I lived in. Right, 583 00:31:49,920 --> 00:31:52,000 Speaker 1: That's that's a journey, and that's a journey like a 584 00:31:52,040 --> 00:31:52,840 Speaker 1: lot of people are on. 585 00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:55,960 Speaker 2: I think, oh, one hundred percent, such a tough one. 586 00:31:56,280 --> 00:31:57,680 Speaker 2: You know, it's so difficult. 587 00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:01,680 Speaker 1: Yeah, well you and I got through it. I'm still 588 00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:03,480 Speaker 1: a work in progress though, I'm still a fuck with 589 00:32:03,600 --> 00:32:08,320 Speaker 1: around food. Hey, I wanted to ask you a little 590 00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:11,160 Speaker 1: bit about dealing with pressure, like you were talking about 591 00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:15,600 Speaker 1: the the craziness that goes on in kitchens. When I 592 00:32:15,640 --> 00:32:17,640 Speaker 1: was a kid, my parents owned a restaurant and sell 593 00:32:17,680 --> 00:32:22,800 Speaker 1: in a restaurant, and I remember the the interesting chefs, 594 00:32:23,760 --> 00:32:29,600 Speaker 1: you know if they were interesting and talented, artistic, creative, 595 00:32:29,720 --> 00:32:35,160 Speaker 1: high maintenance some of them. But tell me about your 596 00:32:36,680 --> 00:32:41,320 Speaker 1: the way that you deal with pressure and expectations and 597 00:32:41,400 --> 00:32:44,400 Speaker 1: all the you know, the behind the scenes drama that 598 00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:48,920 Speaker 1: can be in a very high profile, very successful because 599 00:32:48,960 --> 00:32:52,560 Speaker 1: when people are coming to Attaka, they expect awesome, and 600 00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:55,360 Speaker 1: so you've got to do Yeah. 601 00:32:55,480 --> 00:32:57,960 Speaker 2: No, there's a great question. There is a lot of 602 00:32:57,960 --> 00:33:03,560 Speaker 2: pressure and the way that I've dealt with that pressure myself, 603 00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:06,040 Speaker 2: this is probably not quite the same as the way 604 00:33:06,080 --> 00:33:08,360 Speaker 2: that the staff have to deal with it. The way 605 00:33:08,360 --> 00:33:11,440 Speaker 2: that I've dealt with it is to and without wanting 606 00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:15,000 Speaker 2: to say on egotist school, or arrogant is to sort 607 00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:21,200 Speaker 2: of understand that I'm the expert in this and that 608 00:33:21,400 --> 00:33:25,200 Speaker 2: I've dedicated my life to this craft completely since the 609 00:33:25,280 --> 00:33:27,960 Speaker 2: time that I was a small child, that I've worked 610 00:33:28,120 --> 00:33:31,440 Speaker 2: the seventy five eighty l weeks, that I've struggled and 611 00:33:31,480 --> 00:33:36,000 Speaker 2: built this thing through determination and through my hands and 612 00:33:36,040 --> 00:33:41,440 Speaker 2: through my mind. Therefore, I set higher standard for myself 613 00:33:41,480 --> 00:33:44,000 Speaker 2: than anybody else could for me. Does that make. 614 00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:44,440 Speaker 1: Sense to you. 615 00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:46,800 Speaker 2: Yes, So that's sort of just like that's not something 616 00:33:46,840 --> 00:33:49,640 Speaker 2: I've really shared with anybody before, but that's kind of 617 00:33:49,680 --> 00:33:52,600 Speaker 2: my mentality. And that's not to say that I always 618 00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:56,800 Speaker 2: get it right or that I'm always perfect, but genuinely 619 00:33:57,280 --> 00:34:03,040 Speaker 2: I said my standard for the team. You're completely correct 620 00:34:03,040 --> 00:34:07,600 Speaker 2: how our customers come with really really high expectations. You know, 621 00:34:07,840 --> 00:34:13,080 Speaker 2: some people come expecting, you know, a near religious experience, 622 00:34:13,120 --> 00:34:15,239 Speaker 2: and that's actually not something to believe it or not 623 00:34:15,280 --> 00:34:19,359 Speaker 2: that we can offer. But but it doesn't mean that 624 00:34:19,440 --> 00:34:24,160 Speaker 2: we that we won't die trying. You know, we are 625 00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:30,040 Speaker 2: completely committed to two excellence for our guests, but for 626 00:34:30,160 --> 00:34:34,040 Speaker 2: our staff, we want that that excellence to be manageable 627 00:34:34,280 --> 00:34:38,760 Speaker 2: and traditionally, as I mentioned, kitchens are ruled through fear, 628 00:34:39,560 --> 00:34:42,400 Speaker 2: you know, and and sort of they've been very misogynistic, 629 00:34:42,480 --> 00:34:45,319 Speaker 2: male dominated places. You know, that's a fact. And they 630 00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:48,600 Speaker 2: still are largely the you know, women still don't have 631 00:34:48,680 --> 00:34:51,840 Speaker 2: the same opportunities as men in hospitality in regards to 632 00:34:52,040 --> 00:34:55,920 Speaker 2: running kitchens. So that I think we just have to 633 00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:59,040 Speaker 2: say that and and understand it. But they've been ruled 634 00:34:59,080 --> 00:35:01,760 Speaker 2: with an iron First, there is a system of hierarchy 635 00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:05,279 Speaker 2: that comes out of France and kitchens, and and you 636 00:35:05,400 --> 00:35:08,839 Speaker 2: dare not make a mistakeless or put a foot wrong, 637 00:35:09,320 --> 00:35:13,320 Speaker 2: or the fist will come down upon you, sometimes actually physically, 638 00:35:14,280 --> 00:35:20,080 Speaker 2: but often mentally. So there've been places of abuse and fear. 639 00:35:20,640 --> 00:35:27,000 Speaker 2: And to me, you know, the idea that a kitchen 640 00:35:27,680 --> 00:35:31,760 Speaker 2: can't be kind and high performance is kind of counterintuitive 641 00:35:32,560 --> 00:35:35,040 Speaker 2: to performance. To me, I just I could that never 642 00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:36,680 Speaker 2: sat with me. I came from the back country in 643 00:35:36,680 --> 00:35:41,240 Speaker 2: New Zealand. I did endure and experience kitchens of this kind. 644 00:35:42,600 --> 00:35:45,239 Speaker 2: But to me, they were never great, they were never 645 00:35:45,320 --> 00:35:49,920 Speaker 2: doing meaningful work. And and so for me, how we 646 00:35:49,960 --> 00:35:53,600 Speaker 2: deal with that that pressure and is that we try 647 00:35:53,600 --> 00:35:56,919 Speaker 2: to eliminate that kind of fear, you know, that that's 648 00:35:57,239 --> 00:35:59,880 Speaker 2: we don't have people running the kitchen who are ranting, 649 00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:03,680 Speaker 2: yelling or abusing our teams. They are calm during service, 650 00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:10,439 Speaker 2: and there's always catastrophes in kitchens. A chef's life is 651 00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:14,440 Speaker 2: in a state of fluid failure. You know, it's not 652 00:36:14,760 --> 00:36:18,240 Speaker 2: if things will go wrong, it's when and how often 653 00:36:18,320 --> 00:36:21,680 Speaker 2: and will anybody fucking notice? That's literally how it is, right, 654 00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:24,960 Speaker 2: And so we're trying to fix everything as we fuck 655 00:36:25,000 --> 00:36:28,480 Speaker 2: everything up, and we're trying to hide it. Right, I've 656 00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:33,280 Speaker 2: been truthful here, you know. You know, it's percentages. Maybe 657 00:36:33,440 --> 00:36:35,239 Speaker 2: our idea of a fuck up is not the same 658 00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:38,799 Speaker 2: as the normal person's, but yet there it is. And 659 00:36:38,840 --> 00:36:41,640 Speaker 2: I think if you don't count those little percentages, then 660 00:36:41,960 --> 00:36:44,799 Speaker 2: then there is a tangible effects. You've got to be 661 00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:49,200 Speaker 2: really disciplined. But so we're hustling and trying to just 662 00:36:49,239 --> 00:36:51,799 Speaker 2: working so hard to just hold it all together kind 663 00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:56,360 Speaker 2: of every night. But if we if and this is 664 00:36:56,520 --> 00:36:59,000 Speaker 2: the same in any kind of high performing kitchen in 665 00:36:59,040 --> 00:37:05,080 Speaker 2: the world, now, if that same kitchen is run by fear, 666 00:37:06,200 --> 00:37:09,320 Speaker 2: then what those cooks will do is they will hide 667 00:37:09,320 --> 00:37:13,400 Speaker 2: those mistakes. And we implore our people to bring the 668 00:37:13,440 --> 00:37:18,120 Speaker 2: mistakes to us immediately, and then calmly. As a team, 669 00:37:18,200 --> 00:37:21,600 Speaker 2: we can figure out how to fix that quickly, because 670 00:37:22,560 --> 00:37:28,319 Speaker 2: whatever catastrophe there is in life, it requires calm and 671 00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:33,759 Speaker 2: persistent attention to fix. If you're losing your shit, if 672 00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:37,880 Speaker 2: you're losing control of yourself, you're just making things worse. 673 00:37:38,440 --> 00:37:40,920 Speaker 2: And you just got to think straight and think about 674 00:37:41,080 --> 00:37:44,040 Speaker 2: this problem about how you're going to overcome it now. 675 00:37:44,080 --> 00:37:46,400 Speaker 2: If it's a really big one and it requires some 676 00:37:46,480 --> 00:37:48,319 Speaker 2: level of this this one, then that can be done 677 00:37:48,840 --> 00:37:51,760 Speaker 2: post the mistake in a calm manner, not in the moment, 678 00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:56,080 Speaker 2: but typically in kitchens it's been you've bucked up. Now 679 00:37:56,080 --> 00:38:00,239 Speaker 2: I'm screaming and spinning in your face, and you feel 680 00:38:00,360 --> 00:38:04,239 Speaker 2: terrified and ashamed, and you've lost your dignity. So I 681 00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:06,239 Speaker 2: think it's really important for our people not to lose 682 00:38:06,280 --> 00:38:09,600 Speaker 2: their dignity within the mistakes that they will absolutely make 683 00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:11,000 Speaker 2: as I make them. 684 00:38:11,520 --> 00:38:15,719 Speaker 1: That's such a such a high level understanding from a 685 00:38:15,760 --> 00:38:21,680 Speaker 1: sociological I don't mean sound like a bloody scientist, but psychological, 686 00:38:21,680 --> 00:38:24,759 Speaker 1: emotional cultural like that awareness of it, apart from all 687 00:38:24,760 --> 00:38:27,080 Speaker 1: the food stuff and the cooking and the business stuff 688 00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:30,799 Speaker 1: and the keeping the you know, the customers or your 689 00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:36,319 Speaker 1: guests satisfied. On top of that understanding how to optimize 690 00:38:36,400 --> 00:38:40,000 Speaker 1: or try to optimize the dynamics and the energy in 691 00:38:40,040 --> 00:38:44,719 Speaker 1: that cauldron. That's some high level shit that you just articulated. 692 00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:46,640 Speaker 1: Most people don't even think like that. 693 00:38:47,960 --> 00:38:51,400 Speaker 2: Well, thank you. That means a lot. I would just 694 00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:54,120 Speaker 2: say as simply as this, though, it comes from an 695 00:38:54,200 --> 00:38:58,960 Speaker 2: understanding that humans don't want to do a bad job. 696 00:39:00,719 --> 00:39:03,240 Speaker 2: You have to have that kind of understanding as the leader. 697 00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:06,879 Speaker 2: Nobody's coming to the kitchen today to fuck up? No, 698 00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:08,960 Speaker 2: why would they do that? Like, I really don't think 699 00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:12,040 Speaker 2: I've ever met somebody even like the employees that haven't 700 00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:14,880 Speaker 2: worked out that truly in their heart came to do 701 00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:15,880 Speaker 2: a bad job today. 702 00:39:16,560 --> 00:39:23,920 Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yeah, So outside of outside of business for 703 00:39:23,960 --> 00:39:27,560 Speaker 1: a minute, how do you manage you? How do you 704 00:39:27,640 --> 00:39:33,960 Speaker 1: stay focused mentally, emotionally healthy, excited, curious? Like what it 705 00:39:34,080 --> 00:39:36,319 Speaker 1: tell us a little bit about you? How you kind 706 00:39:36,360 --> 00:39:41,719 Speaker 1: of optimize yourself or you don't think of it like that? 707 00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:47,279 Speaker 2: No, I do think of it. I sort of have 708 00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:51,799 Speaker 2: a philosophy that and this is just you know, some 709 00:39:51,800 --> 00:39:54,719 Speaker 2: people will walk at this and go that's ridiculous, But 710 00:39:54,760 --> 00:39:57,279 Speaker 2: this is just for me, you know, And I'm not 711 00:39:57,440 --> 00:40:00,319 Speaker 2: saying as I detail this, that this, this is what 712 00:40:00,360 --> 00:40:02,320 Speaker 2: I think other people should do, But this just works 713 00:40:02,360 --> 00:40:05,879 Speaker 2: for me. I just I just try to apply one 714 00:40:06,000 --> 00:40:09,759 Speaker 2: really high standard to everything that I do. And I 715 00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:14,960 Speaker 2: don't differ that standard whether I'm working or whether I'm 716 00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:17,799 Speaker 2: at home. So if I'm parenting, I'm sort of trying 717 00:40:17,840 --> 00:40:19,439 Speaker 2: to do it at the same level that I would 718 00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:23,160 Speaker 2: run Attica. If I'm skateboarding, you know, I'm not a 719 00:40:23,239 --> 00:40:25,880 Speaker 2: very good skateboarder, but like, I'm trying to do it 720 00:40:25,920 --> 00:40:28,720 Speaker 2: to the best of my ability, you know, if I'm 721 00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:32,600 Speaker 2: I love, you know, making things, I'm making stuff up, 722 00:40:32,640 --> 00:40:35,480 Speaker 2: you know, crafting stuff for I just try to do 723 00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:37,520 Speaker 2: it at a high level. I just find it easier 724 00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:40,200 Speaker 2: to do it this way. Then I don't have to 725 00:40:40,239 --> 00:40:43,440 Speaker 2: sort of lower or raise my standard for things. Am 726 00:40:43,480 --> 00:40:46,480 Speaker 2: I always meeting it? Of course? Not like am I 727 00:40:46,520 --> 00:40:49,560 Speaker 2: beating myself up when I don't like no, no, I'm not, no, 728 00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:55,319 Speaker 2: But but I'm trying. And you know, I'm not a 729 00:40:55,360 --> 00:40:58,200 Speaker 2: good example of somebody that kind of makes time for themselves. 730 00:40:58,400 --> 00:41:01,720 Speaker 2: I will pack everything and that I can, and sometimes 731 00:41:01,719 --> 00:41:04,720 Speaker 2: too much, and then, you know, like anybody'll occasionally complain 732 00:41:04,760 --> 00:41:08,040 Speaker 2: to myself about it, but but realistically, like it's on me, 733 00:41:10,040 --> 00:41:12,920 Speaker 2: you know, I have wonderful friends. I think that that's 734 00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:17,400 Speaker 2: so crucial to surround yourself with with people who really 735 00:41:17,480 --> 00:41:20,640 Speaker 2: genuinely care about you for you, and like back to 736 00:41:20,840 --> 00:41:24,400 Speaker 2: this earlier conversation around not for what you do or 737 00:41:25,080 --> 00:41:28,600 Speaker 2: or how famous you are, but for you and people 738 00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:30,600 Speaker 2: that see that see that value in you. I think 739 00:41:30,640 --> 00:41:33,600 Speaker 2: it's so crucial. And those friends you know, have helped 740 00:41:33,600 --> 00:41:36,040 Speaker 2: me through the best at times and the worst times. 741 00:41:36,120 --> 00:41:40,160 Speaker 1: You know, Yeah, yeah, you need that. You need that 742 00:41:40,280 --> 00:41:44,600 Speaker 1: sounding board sometimes, and I call it, I use this 743 00:41:44,760 --> 00:41:48,360 Speaker 1: term called an unreasonable friend, and it's someone that loves you, 744 00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:51,680 Speaker 1: cares about you, but will tell you sometimes what you 745 00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:53,640 Speaker 1: need to here, not necessarily what you want to hear. 746 00:41:54,239 --> 00:41:57,480 Speaker 1: Best guy a friend, right, you know where it's likely 747 00:41:58,160 --> 00:42:00,200 Speaker 1: I'd sell people. I don't need a fan club. I 748 00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:02,120 Speaker 1: don't need you to tell me I'm amazing when I'm 749 00:42:02,120 --> 00:42:05,160 Speaker 1: being a dickhead. It doesn't help you, it doesn't help me, 750 00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:09,799 Speaker 1: and it's not true, you know. And I think that 751 00:42:10,000 --> 00:42:14,359 Speaker 1: ability to be able to be okay with getting things 752 00:42:14,480 --> 00:42:18,799 Speaker 1: right and not right and not beating yourself up. And 753 00:42:18,880 --> 00:42:22,080 Speaker 1: I think also because thinking when you're talking about how 754 00:42:22,160 --> 00:42:24,920 Speaker 1: much you work, like I work a lot, TIF works 755 00:42:24,920 --> 00:42:29,280 Speaker 1: a lot. You know, I'm full time work, full time study, 756 00:42:29,400 --> 00:42:32,320 Speaker 1: seven podcasts a week, one hundred and twenty speaking gigs 757 00:42:32,320 --> 00:42:36,480 Speaker 1: a year, consulting, lots of shit, right, But all the 758 00:42:36,520 --> 00:42:43,160 Speaker 1: stuff that I do is somewhere between I enjoy it 759 00:42:43,320 --> 00:42:46,240 Speaker 1: and I fucking love it, Like I don't do anything 760 00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:47,160 Speaker 1: I hate. 761 00:42:47,520 --> 00:42:47,719 Speaker 2: Right. 762 00:42:48,160 --> 00:42:55,759 Speaker 1: So, in the corporate speaking, coaching, mentoring workshop space, you know, 763 00:42:55,840 --> 00:42:58,480 Speaker 1: they're for one hundred years, not really, probably fifty years, 764 00:42:58,480 --> 00:43:02,120 Speaker 1: they've been talking about work life balance, And for me, 765 00:43:02,160 --> 00:43:06,040 Speaker 1: it's a redundant concept because it kind of suggests that 766 00:43:06,120 --> 00:43:10,359 Speaker 1: there's a like almost a number, like a balance that 767 00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:14,200 Speaker 1: we get this much work, Ben and this much not work, 768 00:43:14,560 --> 00:43:16,919 Speaker 1: and then when we get the scales right, and it's 769 00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:21,480 Speaker 1: like it's a numerical thing, and I'm like no, because 770 00:43:21,520 --> 00:43:23,480 Speaker 1: you might do twenty hours a week, which is not 771 00:43:23,560 --> 00:43:26,600 Speaker 1: many hours, but you fucking hate every hour and that 772 00:43:26,800 --> 00:43:30,880 Speaker 1: is really bad for you mentally, emotionally, physically, versus you 773 00:43:30,960 --> 00:43:34,279 Speaker 1: do eighty hours, which again I'm not suggesting neither's Ben, 774 00:43:35,080 --> 00:43:38,399 Speaker 1: but you might do eighty hours a week periodically of shit. 775 00:43:38,480 --> 00:43:43,200 Speaker 1: That just fucking excites you, stimulates you, grows you, gives 776 00:43:43,239 --> 00:43:48,160 Speaker 1: you joy, pleasure, Like right now, I'm you're I'm not 777 00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:51,040 Speaker 1: pissing in your pocket. I love you, You're awesome. I 778 00:43:51,120 --> 00:43:55,160 Speaker 1: could hang out with you. This is my job, Like 779 00:43:55,280 --> 00:43:58,840 Speaker 1: I'm talking to you. This is ridiculous, this is fun 780 00:43:58,880 --> 00:44:02,080 Speaker 1: for me. This is for me. But this is one 781 00:44:02,120 --> 00:44:05,520 Speaker 1: of the components of my work. And you know, when 782 00:44:05,560 --> 00:44:07,920 Speaker 1: you do shit that I know, people go when you 783 00:44:07,960 --> 00:44:09,680 Speaker 1: do what you love, you never work a day in 784 00:44:09,680 --> 00:44:11,920 Speaker 1: your life, and that's kind of cliche and not always 785 00:44:11,920 --> 00:44:15,600 Speaker 1: possible all the time. But yeah, like for me, the 786 00:44:15,680 --> 00:44:17,960 Speaker 1: stuff that I do, and I think probably the stuff 787 00:44:17,960 --> 00:44:22,520 Speaker 1: that you do, despite the periodic stress and anxiety, for 788 00:44:22,560 --> 00:44:26,279 Speaker 1: the most part, it's a positive like it's it's a 789 00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:27,960 Speaker 1: net result, you know. 790 00:44:28,800 --> 00:44:31,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, And sometimes even when it's negative, it's kind of positive, 791 00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:34,400 Speaker 2: you know, Like, and I couldn't agree more with what 792 00:44:34,440 --> 00:44:37,400 Speaker 2: you're saying. And I'm not a matter I hope nobody 793 00:44:37,760 --> 00:44:41,319 Speaker 2: listening thinks for him, he has to work so much. No, 794 00:44:41,760 --> 00:44:45,480 Speaker 2: I'm choosing that, you know, just like you know, I 795 00:44:46,120 --> 00:44:48,440 Speaker 2: chose to turn up for this interview on time, you know, 796 00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:54,840 Speaker 2: But but I really think, like you know, for me, 797 00:44:54,920 --> 00:44:58,400 Speaker 2: it's kind of trying to I don't differentiate really between 798 00:44:59,200 --> 00:45:01,120 Speaker 2: I don't really do work and I don't really do home. 799 00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:03,560 Speaker 2: I just kind of do life. And maybe that sounds 800 00:45:03,719 --> 00:45:07,640 Speaker 2: a little cliche, but I really don't like the strong 801 00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:13,160 Speaker 2: demarcation between work and the rest of life. Certainly don't 802 00:45:13,280 --> 00:45:16,160 Speaker 2: like the idea of having to work for the rest 803 00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:20,080 Speaker 2: of life. Like I just think that the work part 804 00:45:20,320 --> 00:45:22,920 Speaker 2: is just too big a part of life for it 805 00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:26,840 Speaker 2: not to be enjoyable, at least on some level. You know, 806 00:45:27,000 --> 00:45:30,000 Speaker 2: maybe it's not possible for every person in the world 807 00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:33,239 Speaker 2: to find as much joy in their work as you 808 00:45:33,360 --> 00:45:35,719 Speaker 2: clearly do, and I clearly do it, even though I 809 00:45:35,719 --> 00:45:39,320 Speaker 2: would really hope that for people, you know, But I 810 00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:43,440 Speaker 2: would say that trying to find fun and stuff and 811 00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:45,920 Speaker 2: joy in it is just central to happiness. And I'll 812 00:45:45,960 --> 00:45:51,279 Speaker 2: give you a Philly example from yesterday. We found this 813 00:45:51,960 --> 00:45:55,680 Speaker 2: enormous cactus on Facebook marketplace. It's like three point eight 814 00:45:55,719 --> 00:46:01,440 Speaker 2: meters tall, it's got multiple heads, it's hundred kilos. I 815 00:46:01,600 --> 00:46:05,160 Speaker 2: spent six hours dragging it from this guy's backyard to 816 00:46:05,160 --> 00:46:08,360 Speaker 2: get it on as Bunning's higher. You right, it's absolutely insane. 817 00:46:08,480 --> 00:46:10,880 Speaker 2: Like I am prepared to do things that are ridiculous. 818 00:46:11,440 --> 00:46:12,920 Speaker 2: If that's not clear yet. 819 00:46:13,160 --> 00:46:15,200 Speaker 1: You know, you know there's people who can do shit 820 00:46:15,400 --> 00:46:18,040 Speaker 1: like that, right, you know you don't want to personally 821 00:46:18,080 --> 00:46:19,360 Speaker 1: do that yourself, you dickhead. 822 00:46:19,880 --> 00:46:21,680 Speaker 2: I'm actually going to say, I don't know if there 823 00:46:21,760 --> 00:46:25,040 Speaker 2: is in this case, because nobody would be stupid enough 824 00:46:25,080 --> 00:46:27,879 Speaker 2: to move this flip and plant, and they couldn't sell it. 825 00:46:27,880 --> 00:46:30,600 Speaker 2: It was quite cheap. It's beautiful cactus. Anyway. The story 826 00:46:30,680 --> 00:46:32,960 Speaker 2: is a battle in a battle, in a battle to 827 00:46:33,000 --> 00:46:34,719 Speaker 2: get it to our house. I get it off the 828 00:46:34,719 --> 00:46:39,040 Speaker 2: you our fantastic chefs, and they have to you know, 829 00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:41,360 Speaker 2: they come up to help me, which thank god, we 830 00:46:41,480 --> 00:46:43,560 Speaker 2: thought we were going to die as we stood it up. 831 00:46:43,960 --> 00:46:46,799 Speaker 2: I get it in the ground, I stake it. It 832 00:46:46,840 --> 00:46:50,680 Speaker 2: looks amazing. All the neighbors are very happy. And then 833 00:46:50,719 --> 00:46:55,279 Speaker 2: the wind come on Monday, and I didn't know how 834 00:46:55,320 --> 00:46:57,080 Speaker 2: long it would take the route, and I had a state 835 00:46:57,200 --> 00:46:59,359 Speaker 2: for a month old that's probably going to be okay. 836 00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:02,120 Speaker 2: I removed the state. The wind blows the thing over. Now, 837 00:47:02,239 --> 00:47:05,520 Speaker 2: that same day, i'd been to the doctor who told 838 00:47:05,560 --> 00:47:09,040 Speaker 2: me that I tore a tendon in my knee moving 839 00:47:09,080 --> 00:47:12,000 Speaker 2: that fucking cactus. So you can imagine how that made 840 00:47:12,080 --> 00:47:15,520 Speaker 2: me feel, right like, kind of very depressed. And I've 841 00:47:15,560 --> 00:47:18,319 Speaker 2: been told I can't bend over and lift stuff at 842 00:47:18,360 --> 00:47:19,640 Speaker 2: the moment for a bit. The knee's going to be 843 00:47:19,640 --> 00:47:23,080 Speaker 2: fine anyway. In a fantastic name this long story, but 844 00:47:23,120 --> 00:47:25,799 Speaker 2: I'm going to quickly wind it up. Fantastic neighbor rang 845 00:47:25,840 --> 00:47:28,800 Speaker 2: me and said, I've got six builders renovating in the 846 00:47:28,800 --> 00:47:31,399 Speaker 2: front of our house. I'd like to send them over 847 00:47:31,440 --> 00:47:33,680 Speaker 2: to help you pick up your cactus. And so the 848 00:47:33,680 --> 00:47:36,480 Speaker 2: builders came over. And I've been around. I grew up 849 00:47:36,480 --> 00:47:39,800 Speaker 2: on building sites. My father and my uncle builders, and 850 00:47:39,800 --> 00:47:41,880 Speaker 2: there were such nice people, and we had such a 851 00:47:41,880 --> 00:47:44,360 Speaker 2: good time, and we were just making jokes about eating cactus, 852 00:47:44,920 --> 00:47:47,200 Speaker 2: and it was such a joyful thing. The six of 853 00:47:47,280 --> 00:47:49,600 Speaker 2: us working out how to pick up flip and cactus 854 00:47:49,600 --> 00:47:51,520 Speaker 2: and put it back in the ground. Took us about 855 00:47:51,560 --> 00:47:54,359 Speaker 2: thirty minutes. We all shook hands, they all joked about 856 00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:56,440 Speaker 2: how now I owed them a meal at Attica, And 857 00:47:56,520 --> 00:47:58,400 Speaker 2: it was the highlight of my day picking up a 858 00:47:58,440 --> 00:48:01,480 Speaker 2: silly cactus, you know, joyful, trying to find that. I 859 00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:03,200 Speaker 2: just try to find the joy and everything, you know, 860 00:48:04,160 --> 00:48:04,920 Speaker 2: one hundred percent. 861 00:48:05,440 --> 00:48:07,360 Speaker 1: Hey, mate, I could talk to you. For a long time. 862 00:48:07,640 --> 00:48:11,040 Speaker 1: I haven't even spoke to you about art or bikes 863 00:48:11,120 --> 00:48:13,520 Speaker 1: or music or all the other things that you're good 864 00:48:13,560 --> 00:48:18,200 Speaker 1: at and into. But maybe we can, Maybe we can 865 00:48:18,280 --> 00:48:22,880 Speaker 1: reconvene it a later date. Do you want to point 866 00:48:23,239 --> 00:48:25,280 Speaker 1: do you want to point anyone towards anything? 867 00:48:25,840 --> 00:48:26,480 Speaker 2: Oh? 868 00:48:26,880 --> 00:48:29,080 Speaker 1: Did I forget that you're writing a book? Have you 869 00:48:29,160 --> 00:48:29,960 Speaker 1: just written a book? 870 00:48:30,640 --> 00:48:33,640 Speaker 2: I have written a book. Yes, tell me about the book. 871 00:48:34,120 --> 00:48:34,600 Speaker 1: Tells about. 872 00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:39,279 Speaker 2: The book's called Uses for Obsession, And it's out on 873 00:48:39,320 --> 00:48:43,760 Speaker 2: the first of October in Australia and the UK. It's 874 00:48:44,920 --> 00:48:47,240 Speaker 2: a book about the search for the meaning and everything. 875 00:48:47,600 --> 00:48:52,240 Speaker 2: It's kind of a memoir meets manifesto. It's searing, hopefully, 876 00:48:52,280 --> 00:48:56,799 Speaker 2: it's hilarious. It tells a bunch of brutally honest stories. 877 00:48:58,719 --> 00:49:00,960 Speaker 2: And you know, I'm really excit about it. I've spent 878 00:49:01,000 --> 00:49:02,960 Speaker 2: the last two years writing it. Writing is one of 879 00:49:03,040 --> 00:49:07,640 Speaker 2: my greatest pleasures. Yeah, it's it's out soon. It's got 880 00:49:07,640 --> 00:49:10,640 Speaker 2: three recipes for bolonnes in it, and I invite the 881 00:49:10,680 --> 00:49:14,680 Speaker 2: reader to join my bolonnaise cult and to progress through 882 00:49:14,680 --> 00:49:17,240 Speaker 2: the cult. They've got to make these three recipes, starting 883 00:49:17,280 --> 00:49:20,440 Speaker 2: with really basic kind of beginner bolonnaise, then kind of 884 00:49:20,440 --> 00:49:24,520 Speaker 2: a mid range one, then like expert level. So that's 885 00:49:24,560 --> 00:49:26,200 Speaker 2: my sales. That's my sales, pitch. 886 00:49:26,920 --> 00:49:28,680 Speaker 1: I love a good cult. Just tell me the name 887 00:49:28,719 --> 00:49:34,359 Speaker 1: of the book again, uses for obsession. I love it. 888 00:49:34,440 --> 00:49:37,960 Speaker 1: Such a clever name and two uses for obsession? Is it? 889 00:49:38,840 --> 00:49:41,040 Speaker 1: So it's out on October one in all good and 890 00:49:41,080 --> 00:49:43,879 Speaker 1: shit bookstores? Is it going to be on audio as well? 891 00:49:44,600 --> 00:49:48,040 Speaker 2: Yeah? And I rated the audiobook myself about six weeks ago. 892 00:49:48,440 --> 00:49:49,560 Speaker 2: Was a hell of an experience. 893 00:49:50,280 --> 00:49:51,600 Speaker 1: How many days did that take you? 894 00:49:52,719 --> 00:49:56,920 Speaker 2: Six six hour days and about six hours of prep 895 00:49:56,960 --> 00:49:58,680 Speaker 2: on either side? 896 00:49:58,960 --> 00:50:01,840 Speaker 1: And so what is the end product? How many hours 897 00:50:01,920 --> 00:50:03,080 Speaker 1: is the audio book? 898 00:50:03,320 --> 00:50:05,040 Speaker 2: I think it's about eight and a half. I haven't 899 00:50:05,040 --> 00:50:07,880 Speaker 2: actually heard the whole thing yet. It is a fascinating, 900 00:50:08,040 --> 00:50:11,879 Speaker 2: fascinating experience. Yeah, I don't believe how many how many? 901 00:50:11,960 --> 00:50:16,400 Speaker 2: How I mispronounced so many words you would never imagine, 902 00:50:16,480 --> 00:50:20,040 Speaker 2: like you've been called out by the producer every thirty seconds. 903 00:50:20,320 --> 00:50:25,520 Speaker 1: Say that again, that's hilarious. The book's called uses for obsession. Mate. 904 00:50:25,520 --> 00:50:27,279 Speaker 1: It's been really nice to chat to you and get 905 00:50:27,280 --> 00:50:28,759 Speaker 1: to know you a little bit, and I would love 906 00:50:28,760 --> 00:50:31,239 Speaker 1: it if you would come back we'll say goodbye Fair 907 00:50:31,280 --> 00:50:34,120 Speaker 1: but for the moment, Ben, thanks for being on the show. 908 00:50:34,160 --> 00:50:35,160 Speaker 1: I really appreciate you. 909 00:50:35,960 --> 00:50:39,040 Speaker 2: Thanks so much, Greg, and to really appreciate you guys.