Speaker 1: Apogae Production.
Speaker 2: Welcome back to another episode of Amia Mad mum My Podcast.
Speaker 1: We ask you this question, don't we in and out
Speaker 1: every week? We've been asking it for such a long
Speaker 1: time now.
Speaker 2: When we think back to when we started the podcast,
Speaker 2: kind of felt like it would have like a shelf life,
Speaker 2: like it would be, I don't know, for a few
Speaker 2: years while the kids were young and now they're getting older.
Speaker 2: But what we've realized is that it never stops. Like
Speaker 2: there's things that get better with kids and then they
Speaker 2: come hand in hand with something that gets worse.
Speaker 1: Yeah, the stages and ages that you sort of go.
Speaker 1: And I always said it, I was like, I feel like
Speaker 1: you just get a handle on one particular stage and
Speaker 1: age and then all of a sudden it shifts. It's
Speaker 1: just here, bang, Okay, cool, how do I do this again?
Speaker 1: And you just start like, I don't know, learning how
Speaker 1: to juggle eight, you know, balls instead of three kind
Speaker 1: of thing. It's just a circus. Some days it is
Speaker 1: dead set like a circus.
Speaker 2: And this is where and I've said this a few times.
Speaker 2: I know you're probably gonna think, gee, she's really keen
Speaker 2: to get this going, But this is where I go
Speaker 2: then being a grandparent.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you're.
Speaker 2: Going back to those stages that you've went through and
Speaker 2: he found difficult, but I feel like we'll have a
Speaker 2: better understanding of how to handle them.
Speaker 1: I was having this conversation with the lovely gentleman that
Speaker 1: does our pool cleaning at home, and he was like, oh,
Speaker 1: guess what, rage I'm a grandfather, and he was so
Speaker 1: excited and so pumped, and I was like looked at
Speaker 1: him and I was like, oh, young grandfather, you know,
Speaker 1: like we're having a laugh. But then he goes, it's
Speaker 1: so much better. I literally get all of the good
Speaker 1: times with them, and then I hand them back and
Speaker 1: I say see you later, and then they go just
Speaker 1: on that.
Speaker 2: And I've just had this crazy realization. My kids are
Speaker 2: sixteen in November. They're twenty in four years time. Yes,
Speaker 2: I could be a grandparent.
Speaker 1: No you're not. I'm going to encourage them not to
Speaker 1: be letting you become. Yeah, I know.
Speaker 2: So I had them at twenty five, which is young. Yep,
Speaker 2: even that is why can't I do the math on that?
Speaker 1: He's literally looking at and ten years, that's nine years.
Speaker 1: It's like nine ten years.
Speaker 2: You're going to be saying at twenty five. Yes, in
Speaker 2: nine years, I.
Speaker 3: Will be doesn't add thirty five?
Speaker 1: Am I a bad mum for not wanting to create
Speaker 1: a knock on effect? Not it's a bit of a topic.
Speaker 1: We go a little bit personal here, but that's okay.
Speaker 1: That's what we do.
Speaker 2: Because most of the time we forget anyone's listening. We
Speaker 2: feel like it's just a safe space for us to
Speaker 2: talk to each other. I mean, if we really thought
Speaker 2: about it, we probably wouldn't talk about half of the
Speaker 2: shit that we do.
Speaker 1: No, obviously, you've got two girls. I've got two girls.
Speaker 1: We are in the depths of different ages and different stages,
Speaker 1: and right now there's a lot of conversation in our
Speaker 1: particular household. And I'm sure you've already been through this
Speaker 1: around puberty and yeah. Always over dinner, we're eating like
Speaker 1: a mouthful of like what have you just like chicken schnitty,
Speaker 1: and you're like, what where did that question come from?
Speaker 2: And it's like, Bam, here have a question. Yeah you
Speaker 2: haven't prepared for.
Speaker 1: Yes, that's what. I literally scoop some peas in my
Speaker 1: mouth and Elsie said something other and I nearly sput
Speaker 1: them across the table.
Speaker 2: It was like, it's like you're in a full sense
Speaker 2: of security, enjoying your chicken and your vegetables. Next minute,
Speaker 2: my girls, have you ever smoked a cigarette ever in
Speaker 2: your life?
Speaker 3: He's the right answer here.
Speaker 1: I love that you're like look around the table for like,
Speaker 1: can I have fifty to fifty on this? Can I
Speaker 1: find a friend?
Speaker 2: Did you know you have a drink alcohol before you're eighteen?
Speaker 3: Tough one?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Did I come back to you on that? Let
Speaker 1: me just make up a story that doesn't Yeah, So,
Speaker 1: going through the whole puberty and questions that are getting
Speaker 1: fired around the table, left, right and center, even this,
Speaker 1: I've got to bridge how I'm bringing it up. Basically,
Speaker 1: what it has been is that when Elsie was about
Speaker 1: three and a half, maybe nearly four, I decided, just
Speaker 1: to give you some context about it, I have ever
Speaker 1: really had large breasts in my whole entire life. I
Speaker 1: was totally okay with it. Proceed further, have two children breastfeed,
Speaker 1: and then once the second child finishes breastfeeding, my boobs
Speaker 1: were like tenfold worse. And now this doesn't make it okay,
Speaker 1: but this is just a personal preference. It's what I decided.
Speaker 1: But basically, it was like whatever I had left of
Speaker 1: boobs literally like went inwood and sunk into my chest
Speaker 1: rather than having sort of anything.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they like disappeared, just just but not even disappeared
Speaker 2: like worse some people like when I look at mine,
Speaker 2: like I breastfeed the girls, I think I did about
Speaker 2: five or six months.
Speaker 1: Yeah that's all I did, too, look.
Speaker 2: Down at mine like a couple of spaniels ears.
Speaker 1: Mine didn't even get to become like puppy ears. It
Speaker 1: was like they almost went back into my chest. It
Speaker 1: was so odd. But what had happened was we were
Speaker 1: on the beach one day and I'm playing with the
Speaker 1: kids because they were only little, and I looked down
Speaker 1: and my swimmer's top you could see straight through it
Speaker 1: top to bottom, like I'm talking gap, and I was
Speaker 1: down playing and digging with the kids, and I was
Speaker 1: like so self conscious. So proceed forward to like Elsie
Speaker 1: being three and a half, and I decided to take
Speaker 1: myself in not telling anyone, tell anyone, told no one,
Speaker 1: no one, not even my husband, And I took myself
Speaker 1: in for an appointment to look at what you could
Speaker 1: do for breast implants, and was just like I think
Speaker 1: I'm going to do it now. I researched for about
Speaker 1: three months before it, found the person that I felt
Speaker 1: comfortable with, then looked into it and I literally just
Speaker 1: wanted the smallest implant that they physically had, just so
Speaker 1: I could feel a little bit feminine. Right, Yeah, that
Speaker 1: was my intent. And in the process you've got to
Speaker 1: try all of the sizes on like it was so funny,
Speaker 1: but at the same time, absolutely still just wanted something
Speaker 1: that just made me feel fair feminine, and that was
Speaker 1: why I got them. Right now, fast forward, as we know,
Speaker 1: as a parent, you always shower with your children because
Speaker 1: they don't let you have any other option. So I've
Speaker 1: managed to and you know, because of the surgeon that
Speaker 1: I had, I have no scars. He did an amazing job,
Speaker 1: like it's a science. It blows my mind how much
Speaker 1: it's a science, but just an amazing job. Feel feminine
Speaker 1: absolutely what I wanted. But the whole thing was I
Speaker 1: didn't have scars, so I didn't have to explain anything.
Speaker 2: Can I just ask a question here, because you didn't
Speaker 2: tell anyone you were going for the initiative? Oh yeah,
Speaker 2: did you tell anyone when you were going actually into surgery?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 3: Because really hard to Yeah.
Speaker 1: I was like, there was no way, what was the Your.
Speaker 3: Husband be like, what's happened to you?
Speaker 1: Sam? No? No, So once I decided, and then I
Speaker 1: was happy with the size, and then I finally committed
Speaker 1: to the date. It kind of happened really quickly because
Speaker 1: I don't know how to cancelation. But Sam literally dropped
Speaker 1: me off for surgery on the way to a game
Speaker 1: so that he had a home game. They were playing
Speaker 1: football and it was in Brisbane, and he dropped me
Speaker 1: off on the way. Yeah, oh yeah, enjoy surgery.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So there I am getting out of the car, going
Speaker 1: good luck O the game. I hope you win. But
Speaker 1: at the same time I'm going in. And long story
Speaker 1: short is I didn't have to explain myself to the
Speaker 1: kids because they were not of age to understand, and
Speaker 1: Mum was just not well and you know whatever, So
Speaker 1: we just left it at that. And then as the
Speaker 1: progression went, I never explained myself because I didn't have
Speaker 1: to because I'd never asked it. They'd never seen the scars,
Speaker 1: they never were even like, they just thought they were
Speaker 1: my boobs. Now, fast forward and then Nanadee comes into
Speaker 1: the plans for some reason, something's come up and my
Speaker 1: mum has thrown me under. Look, there's no hard feelings, nanady,
Speaker 1: but she's thrown me under the bus and says something
Speaker 1: about will your mum's had her boobs done? And that's
Speaker 1: how my kids found out.
Speaker 3: Did she tell you she was gonna say that.
Speaker 1: No, she's had a brain explosion. And so then I
Speaker 1: have two children coming up me going you've had your boobster?
Speaker 1: What does that mean? Where? Show me? And I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: this is not how I ever saw it happening.
Speaker 2: It's really interesting that you bring this up, because it's
Speaker 2: hard with girls. I feel like, because we're all about
Speaker 2: love your body, you know this is the only one
Speaker 2: you've got given blah blah blah. I've had an issue
Speaker 2: with my nose forever. Actually, when I say forever, it
Speaker 2: was someone that brought it to my attention, which I
Speaker 2: feel like all our insecurities come from someone at some
Speaker 2: point saying that's not right or this could be better. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and then you feel shit about yourself for the rest
Speaker 2: of your life. She just remember what they said. And
Speaker 2: so I've had that for like a long time. But
Speaker 2: I got to the stage where I was like, I
Speaker 2: can't do anything about it because my kids have got
Speaker 2: this same knows and if I'm showing them that I
Speaker 2: have to fix mine, am I saying to them they
Speaker 2: have to fix theirs.
Speaker 3: I've spoken to people who have had completely.
Speaker 2: Different views on that, the view of, yeah, you're showing
Speaker 2: them that there's something wrong. You should be happy with
Speaker 2: your body and you know this is what you've been
Speaker 2: given and be confident and all the.
Speaker 3: Rest of it and love yourself.
Speaker 2: And then there's the other side where I've definitely had
Speaker 2: people go, you're showing that you can do something about it,
Speaker 2: and you know, you're brave and all that kind.
Speaker 3: Of stuff as well. So it's really interesting.
Speaker 1: I think we're interesting. Yeah, and we're in a society
Speaker 1: now that with girls especially and young boys, but young girls,
Speaker 1: you know, with social media and the online presence of
Speaker 1: so many like influencers and all the rest, that it's
Speaker 1: not reality, but they have that influence there constantly in
Speaker 1: front of them, this like body disillusion of like what
Speaker 1: the perfect body would be. Now, no body is perfect,
Speaker 1: as in physically bodies.
Speaker 2: Nobody is perfect, but what you're seeing on social media,
Speaker 2: you are seeing the people that are perfect, and so
Speaker 2: in terms of like getting a nose shob for example.
Speaker 2: And don't get me wrong, I don't have enough money
Speaker 2: for a nose job. And I'm also shit scared of
Speaker 2: being put to sleep and I had a Colonoscopy're not
Speaker 2: going down that. I had my wisdom tooth take it
Speaker 2: out whilst I was awake, because that's so scared I am.
Speaker 3: Because of that.
Speaker 2: Nurse that time that was explaining the drugs I used
Speaker 2: for a colonoscopy, and she went, let me write them
Speaker 2: down for you and you can do your own research.
Speaker 3: And she went, what's it called? What's it called? What's
Speaker 3: it called? The one that Michael Jackson died of? And
Speaker 3: I was like, I don't want it. I don't want
Speaker 3: you don't want to stay awake.
Speaker 1: I think that was the worst thing that she could
Speaker 1: have ever said to you, because, oh my gosh, you're
Speaker 1: the funniest when it comes to going under anesthetic. Because
Speaker 1: I was like, there's no way I want to be
Speaker 1: awake for a Colonoscoby, hook me up, let's go.
Speaker 2: But then I'm like, when you're asleep, you're out of control.
Speaker 2: Like that's the thing for me. When you're put to sleep,
Speaker 2: you're completely out of control.
Speaker 1: I know what happens once you go under. I always
Speaker 1: have that question, always have that question of that.
Speaker 3: Did you ever see that?
Speaker 2: There was a sixty minutes episode that followed this doctor
Speaker 2: he's a cosmetic said yes, and he was like filming
Speaker 2: TikTok videos while his were asleep, and some of the
Speaker 2: stuff he was doing to.
Speaker 1: The horrible horrible. I would hope that my judgment, like
Speaker 1: of character, would be that I picked the one, hopefully,
Speaker 1: But going back to what we were doing about, which
Speaker 1: is they already have this influence and I don't want
Speaker 1: to create the knock on effect. I had to very
Speaker 1: much explain myself over a good old nightly dinner about
Speaker 1: why I chose to get my boobs and what it
Speaker 1: meant to me and like that whole like, but you
Speaker 1: don't have to do it, Not everyone has to do it.
Speaker 1: But this is why I chose to form my body.
Speaker 1: You're not got my body. You've got a different body
Speaker 1: to me, You've got a different makeup. Elsie looks at
Speaker 1: me and goes, maum, I think I'm going to be
Speaker 1: like you. I was like, what do you mean? And
Speaker 1: she was like, well, I think I just will have
Speaker 1: no boobs pretty much for my whole entire life until
Speaker 1: I go and get mine done. I was like, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1: I was like, your boobs might just grow later mine
Speaker 1: because she's really grow, but yours may you grow and
Speaker 1: then you've got Gracie on the other hand, where I
Speaker 1: look and go, I swear to God, the genetics have
Speaker 1: like skipped me. So my mom it skipped me and
Speaker 1: went to Gracie because like, I think, poor Gracie is
Speaker 1: going to have Nanade's problem. I'm telling you. I took
Speaker 1: my mom with me to that sizing appointment because that's
Speaker 1: how I broke the news to her that I was
Speaker 1: going to get my booms out. I was like, come
Speaker 1: to an appointment with me. The surgeon sat there and
Speaker 1: looked at my mom and goes, oh, wow, must have
Speaker 1: skipped a generation. What you're sitting here judging me? Well,
Speaker 1: you look at my mom and he was like, it's impressive,
Speaker 1: Like stop talking.
Speaker 2: How about we forget about the implants and we just
Speaker 2: share out some of yours.
Speaker 1: That was one of the most awkward appointments ever been.
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm sitting here with like no top on.
Speaker 1: My Mom's sitting there like we're all in a room together,
Speaker 1: and you're saying, oh, well, to shame, you know, you
Speaker 1: just missed out on what your mum's got what.
Speaker 2: I had a friend back in the day, I remember,
Speaker 2: and she was calling up about a boob job, and
Speaker 2: I remember she didn't quite have enough money for it,
Speaker 2: and she asked the question, could I come in and
Speaker 2: get one done.
Speaker 3: Save up for a while, and.
Speaker 1: Then do the other.
Speaker 3: I remember thinking, are you crazy?
Speaker 1: Could you imagine walking around a whole lotside?
Speaker 3: Why do you find a bra for that situation?
Speaker 2: Think yourself, lucky you've had to explain your situation to
Speaker 2: your kids. Imagine having to explain hers.