WEBVTT - Steph Tisdell Has Quit Stand Up Comedy 0:00:00.640 --> 0:00:03.080 Welcome to First things First, I'm Maddie Mills. My pronouns 0:00:03.080 --> 0:00:03.760 are he and him. 0:00:04.000 --> 0:00:06.040 I'm Brook Blurt and my pronouns are she and her. 0:00:06.640 --> 0:00:08.559 And before we get started, we'd like to acknowledge the 0:00:08.600 --> 0:00:10.680 custodians of the land on which we record, and for 0:00:10.720 --> 0:00:13.320 me today that's the gaddigal people of the orination. 0:00:13.280 --> 0:00:15.920 And for me it's a reundery people of the cooler nation. 0:00:16.560 --> 0:00:17.560 Let's get into it. 0:00:17.960 --> 0:00:19.160 Let's get into it. 0:00:20.440 --> 0:00:22.920 Ooh, what an exciting episode we have. 0:00:23.239 --> 0:00:25.919 Oh, super exciting because off the back of hosting the 0:00:26.040 --> 0:00:29.600 National NATOK Awards on Ghana Country in Adelaide, we have 0:00:29.680 --> 0:00:33.479 Steph Tisdell, who is an author, actress and the best 0:00:33.520 --> 0:00:36.360 stand up comedian in this country. I'm saying it, Ah, 0:00:37.640 --> 0:00:42.280 you stop it right now. You know what, I'm not 0:00:42.320 --> 0:00:44.000 the only person who said that. I had lunch with 0:00:44.080 --> 0:00:46.160 the comedian the other day and they said to my face, 0:00:46.240 --> 0:00:48.320 they said, I was so excited about having you on 0:00:48.360 --> 0:00:50.239 the on the podcast Steph, And they said to me, 0:00:50.640 --> 0:00:54.240 I absolutely love her. She is the best stand up 0:00:54.280 --> 0:00:56.920 comedian in this country and she doesn't do stand up anymore. 0:00:57.360 --> 0:00:58.640 You gonna tell me who said that? 0:00:58.960 --> 0:01:00.760 Oh, I will if you got to dollars. 0:01:03.280 --> 0:01:03.800 Bargaining? 0:01:06.120 --> 0:01:06.680 What that? 0:01:09.520 --> 0:01:11.200 So you're not doing a stand up anymore. 0:01:11.959 --> 0:01:15.440 I can't do it. It's too it's too hard, I think 0:01:16.040 --> 0:01:20.679 to be a black woman in comedy, it's brutal. I 0:01:20.680 --> 0:01:23.679 think being a black profile person in general, you followers 0:01:23.760 --> 0:01:28.399 must cop it too. But I think when you're you know, 0:01:28.440 --> 0:01:31.840 when you're trying to find a funny edge for hard stuff, 0:01:32.520 --> 0:01:36.240 then you're not only open to flat from white fellows, 0:01:36.280 --> 0:01:39.319 but mob too, because it's very hard to make sure 0:01:39.400 --> 0:01:43.480 you're getting getting across the important stuff without saying the 0:01:43.520 --> 0:01:47.360 wrong things or accidentally, you know, just it's so easy 0:01:47.400 --> 0:01:50.480 to try and make a point for people to listen 0:01:50.520 --> 0:01:53.240 to it, and then actually just being disrespectful, making it 0:01:53.240 --> 0:01:55.120 seem like you're laughing at things that are really tough 0:01:55.120 --> 0:02:00.120 for our mop And I just couldn't. I couldn't do 0:02:00.160 --> 0:02:02.200 that anymore. So scared, and there are so many reasons 0:02:02.240 --> 0:02:06.200 why I left. But I'm happy without it, if I'm honest. 0:02:06.480 --> 0:02:08.160 Oh well, that's good to know. 0:02:08.240 --> 0:02:10.639 I mean, like, you know, you've obviously gone on to achieve, 0:02:11.080 --> 0:02:13.480 you know, massive things in your career as well. 0:02:13.520 --> 0:02:14.400 After stand up? 0:02:14.760 --> 0:02:17.040 What is the difference between being on a set and 0:02:17.040 --> 0:02:19.600 a controlled environment to being out there and being so 0:02:19.720 --> 0:02:22.120 vulnerable in front of a crowd. Is it the fact 0:02:22.160 --> 0:02:23.720 that you don't know what you're going to get. 0:02:24.639 --> 0:02:28.360 I think it's some the feeling of collaboration and community. 0:02:28.400 --> 0:02:31.560 I think that's the big I think like support right, 0:02:31.680 --> 0:02:36.200 Like it's it's so weird. I remember I was having 0:02:36.200 --> 0:02:38.160 a chat with somebody about stand up and I tell 0:02:38.200 --> 0:02:39.760 everybody that I ever meet that they should do it 0:02:39.760 --> 0:02:43.200 because I'm a very anxious person, a very soft person, 0:02:43.720 --> 0:02:47.480 and quite insecure, you know, And I kind of always 0:02:47.520 --> 0:02:50.680 just think stand up is the most intimate thing that 0:02:50.720 --> 0:02:54.040 you will ever do. In the least intimate setting, is 0:02:54.120 --> 0:02:55.480 the most vulnerable thing. 0:02:55.680 --> 0:02:58.040 Oh yeah, I can only imagine you're literally like the 0:02:58.080 --> 0:03:00.200 person running into the burning house us. 0:03:02.080 --> 0:03:06.320 But on stage that I won't tell people in your 0:03:06.360 --> 0:03:09.720 daily level, it feels too close. But when you've got 0:03:09.760 --> 0:03:12.880 that sort of that cover of well I'm trying to 0:03:12.919 --> 0:03:16.320 make people laugh, like it feels very outside of yourself. 0:03:17.520 --> 0:03:23.600 But I think it's like it's so lonely because you 0:03:23.800 --> 0:03:27.040 get off stage and you've just put every answer of 0:03:27.160 --> 0:03:30.360 energy that you have in your body into putting an 0:03:30.440 --> 0:03:32.560 energy into the crowd. That's the big thing as well, 0:03:32.600 --> 0:03:34.840 I think is that above anything else, I just want 0:03:34.840 --> 0:03:37.600 to make people feel loved. So you're like burning out 0:03:37.800 --> 0:03:42.200 everything that you got and then afterwards you're really tired 0:03:42.240 --> 0:03:44.560 and people want to yarn to you and they want 0:03:44.600 --> 0:03:46.600 you to be funny, but by then you're not funny, 0:03:46.760 --> 0:03:47.760 Like you've done the funny. 0:03:48.080 --> 0:03:51.400 Yeah, you're gassed out, ye, empty the tank, Like, yeah. 0:03:52.200 --> 0:03:55.400 That's when you're a little nervous self doubt person comes out. 0:03:55.440 --> 0:03:58.520 And then you go to home alone, to little the 0:03:58.600 --> 0:04:02.520 lonely little hotel room and early flights and late nights and. 0:04:02.880 --> 0:04:05.760 It's not as glamorous as you're sort of saying, like, 0:04:05.840 --> 0:04:07.720 it's not anywhere glamorous. 0:04:07.800 --> 0:04:08.480 Yeah, don't you. 0:04:08.440 --> 0:04:11.000 Think that's the Like that's the industry in general, right, 0:04:11.000 --> 0:04:15.480 It's like mirrors sell the dream, Like so much of 0:04:15.680 --> 0:04:20.359 our job is to create, you know, and it's an idea, 0:04:20.600 --> 0:04:22.760 it's a it's a fantasy for people outside of the 0:04:22.760 --> 0:04:23.919 industry to buy into. 0:04:24.000 --> 0:04:25.440 It's like that you've got to get them to drink 0:04:25.480 --> 0:04:26.080 the kool aid. 0:04:26.640 --> 0:04:29.240 Yes, drink the cool But I know that you know, 0:04:29.279 --> 0:04:31.240 you've been on our screens and we've seen you in 0:04:31.560 --> 0:04:33.359 you know a number of different shows, but can you 0:04:33.400 --> 0:04:35.880 give our viewers, our listeners at home a little insight 0:04:35.920 --> 0:04:36.320 to who you are? 0:04:36.320 --> 0:04:37.360 Well, who's your mob? Where you're from? 0:04:38.120 --> 0:04:41.280 Yes, so I'm a very proud you didn't woman. So 0:04:41.640 --> 0:04:44.280 my people are from fine North Queensland on the Athoden Tableland, 0:04:44.760 --> 0:04:48.520 Younger Bar area in particular, Sorr. That's my birds going 0:04:48.520 --> 0:04:52.560 off from the background when I stept to tell and 0:04:52.960 --> 0:04:56.240 I am this year, that's disgusting. 0:04:59.240 --> 0:05:03.080 I'm Nellie, I'm Nellie. There be there. 0:05:05.120 --> 0:05:09.480 I know. I'm happy to get old like wrinkles. That's 0:05:09.520 --> 0:05:12.080 why I'm going to get botox, but I'm happy to get. 0:05:13.279 --> 0:05:13.599 Black. 0:05:13.640 --> 0:05:16.680 Don't crack but he's like, yeah, literally, the boatos will 0:05:16.720 --> 0:05:17.600 fill the cracks. 0:05:19.400 --> 0:05:20.520 You're so fun. 0:05:22.000 --> 0:05:25.559 Someone said on RuPaul's Drag Race. They reckon black, don't crack, 0:05:25.600 --> 0:05:26.400 but do droop. 0:05:28.640 --> 0:05:34.000 That is I mostly grew up in Brisbane, but yeah, 0:05:34.160 --> 0:05:38.840 I was born in man Eiser on like Calcadoon country. 0:05:39.080 --> 0:05:41.640 Now I just kick around in Brisbane. That's me. 0:05:42.040 --> 0:05:45.080 Man Eiser is Calcadoon country, is it. 0:05:45.200 --> 0:05:47.120 Yeah? Yeah, I've been out to man Eyes. I went, 0:05:47.200 --> 0:05:51.200 oh god, I went to a muster that was interesting. 0:05:51.960 --> 0:05:53.960 Really, Yeah, living out on the farm. 0:05:54.120 --> 0:05:58.880 I was like, yeah, okay, I'm going to my yeah, by. 0:05:58.839 --> 0:06:00.960 The master cattle. 0:06:02.680 --> 0:06:06.480 Yeah, yeah, yeah, cattle cows. 0:06:06.560 --> 0:06:12.080 That's what I'm thinking of, cows, my family, Steph. 0:06:12.120 --> 0:06:14.400 One thing that I found really interesting when doing a 0:06:14.440 --> 0:06:16.240 bit of research is the fact that you wanted to 0:06:16.240 --> 0:06:18.599 be a lawyer, which seems so far from where you 0:06:18.640 --> 0:06:21.960 are right now in terms of you know that being 0:06:22.000 --> 0:06:24.039 a lawyer isn't you know, that creative. 0:06:24.080 --> 0:06:25.640 It's more, you know, strategical. 0:06:25.720 --> 0:06:30.320 I suppose what policy and reading, what inspired. 0:06:29.839 --> 0:06:32.880 The change and actually what inspired you to want to 0:06:32.920 --> 0:06:33.440 be a lawyer? 0:06:34.080 --> 0:06:36.880 Do you know what? I think it's it's that age 0:06:36.920 --> 0:06:39.200 old thing. Everything's gonna say is going to make me 0:06:39.240 --> 0:06:40.279 sound like wanka Now. 0:06:41.000 --> 0:06:43.400 No, it's a safe place. This is a safe place. 0:06:43.720 --> 0:06:45.640 We you sound like wankas every day. 0:06:48.200 --> 0:06:50.839 I was a bit of an overachiever, you know, like 0:06:51.320 --> 0:06:55.640 I found school really easy, Like I just liked sort 0:06:55.640 --> 0:06:57.680 of academia, I guess, and I think it's one of 0:06:57.760 --> 0:07:00.000 those things when people tell you that you're clever or whatever, 0:07:00.120 --> 0:07:04.279 you go better do something clever. Then you know, oh yeah, 0:07:04.440 --> 0:07:07.120 I knew. I knew that I was just a little weirder, 0:07:07.240 --> 0:07:10.000 a little creative, weirder, but you kind of go, oh, well, 0:07:10.000 --> 0:07:13.200 I could do whatever. And I was so passionate, like 0:07:13.560 --> 0:07:16.080 I grew up. I grew up with so much privilege 0:07:16.160 --> 0:07:19.600 in Brisbane, and I just always thought, man, I've been 0:07:19.640 --> 0:07:21.920 given this privilege. I better do so much for mob 0:07:22.480 --> 0:07:26.320 And I thought, you know, I've had so many opportunities 0:07:26.360 --> 0:07:29.800 that so many of our people don't get. And so 0:07:29.960 --> 0:07:32.480 if I don't, you know, use it to get a 0:07:32.480 --> 0:07:34.680 degree where people will listen to me and I can 0:07:34.680 --> 0:07:38.040 write policy and even enter politics. I was like, I 0:07:38.080 --> 0:07:40.920 want to do stuff because you know, when you grow 0:07:41.000 --> 0:07:44.239 up in a really whiteweb around white follows you speak, 0:07:44.600 --> 0:07:47.600 you grow up you know, knowing how to work walk 0:07:47.640 --> 0:07:50.360 in that world. Yeah, and I thought, well, that's going 0:07:50.400 --> 0:07:54.600 to be my secret superpower, you know, And so I 0:07:54.640 --> 0:07:56.800 wanted to That's why I did what, you know, So 0:07:56.960 --> 0:07:59.800 I studied a jewel of law of journalism and then 0:07:59.840 --> 0:08:03.160 I dropped out two and a half years in to 0:08:03.240 --> 0:08:05.280 a five year degree. Like the idiot that I am. 0:08:05.160 --> 0:08:09.000 Ah, could you ever go back? Would you ever consider 0:08:09.040 --> 0:08:11.600 going back or finishing I can. 0:08:11.480 --> 0:08:13.400 Get every degree that's ever been done in. 0:08:13.360 --> 0:08:14.040 The entire. 0:08:16.080 --> 0:08:18.040 I know, it's so fun. I think. 0:08:18.080 --> 0:08:20.080 I think I already got a degree in so many 0:08:20.120 --> 0:08:22.800 things already in my mind, I'm. 0:08:22.680 --> 0:08:24.000 Like, I can do that. 0:08:28.160 --> 0:08:29.680 TikTok's diagnosing everyone. 0:08:30.560 --> 0:08:34.240 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 0:08:34.960 --> 0:08:37.600 I just I just I realized it wasn't for me, 0:08:37.720 --> 0:08:39.920 or it wasn't you know, like I was always really 0:08:39.920 --> 0:08:44.160 sort of led by justice and wanting to do good things, 0:08:44.160 --> 0:08:47.079 and I was like, oh, that's right. Law isn't about justice. 0:08:47.160 --> 0:08:50.240 Law is about precedent and law and money and ownership, 0:08:50.320 --> 0:08:54.600 and it just really kind of and I wasn't. I 0:08:54.600 --> 0:08:56.679 didn't do very well at it because you actually had 0:08:56.679 --> 0:08:59.520 to try, because it was all self led learning and yeah, 0:09:00.320 --> 0:09:02.320 be like whatever, I'll just do some work in class, 0:09:02.360 --> 0:09:04.720 and you know, could get by. And all of a sudden, 0:09:04.720 --> 0:09:08.320 it was like, I don't fit here. I went to 0:09:08.480 --> 0:09:12.319 UQ and it's a bit pretentious in a lot of ways, 0:09:12.400 --> 0:09:14.720 you know, and I just went to a public school, 0:09:14.760 --> 0:09:17.040 and I was just like, I don't fit here. I 0:09:17.080 --> 0:09:20.840 honestly had a big breakdown and then went traveling and 0:09:21.000 --> 0:09:24.760 got dared to do stand up as a joke, and 0:09:25.000 --> 0:09:26.760 I just stood up on a chair and a random 0:09:26.800 --> 0:09:28.880 room did some stand up and it went well. And 0:09:28.920 --> 0:09:32.160 that was literally how everything happened. And then it's just 0:09:32.200 --> 0:09:34.720 been one of those things where everything is aligned after 0:09:34.760 --> 0:09:38.040 that moment and it's like, yeah, that wasn't my path. 0:09:38.240 --> 0:09:41.160 That like ripple effect of like that one moment and 0:09:41.200 --> 0:09:44.760 then yeah, taking an opportunity and then keep there's that 0:09:44.800 --> 0:09:46.800 sort of like yeah, the role on a factor from 0:09:46.880 --> 0:09:48.160 that experience. 0:09:48.240 --> 0:09:53.600 Yeah, it was just that thing of like I was 0:09:53.640 --> 0:09:56.720 sort of confronted with I guess all of the ways 0:09:56.720 --> 0:09:58.920 that I needed to decolonize myself because I was in 0:09:58.920 --> 0:10:01.520 this space. Gone, Man, I've been drinking their kool aid 0:10:01.559 --> 0:10:04.480 for a while. Why is nobody Why is nobody up 0:10:04.480 --> 0:10:07.439 in arms about the stuff that we're learning, Like, you know, 0:10:07.520 --> 0:10:11.000 like why is everyone okay with this course that we're 0:10:11.040 --> 0:10:14.240 doing where we're learning how to find loopholes in legal writing? 0:10:14.240 --> 0:10:18.240 Why is everyone okay with policies that only serve to help, 0:10:18.679 --> 0:10:23.480 you know, defend or get big corporations off. Why are 0:10:23.520 --> 0:10:26.200 we learning about this? Why is this course that we 0:10:26.240 --> 0:10:30.000 did about the Constitution? Why are we learning about terrnalius 0:10:30.640 --> 0:10:36.520 in such a fucking lacking in empathy or emotionality, Like 0:10:36.520 --> 0:10:39.280 like it's just a legal term and it was awful. 0:10:39.320 --> 0:10:43.160 I was just like, why is nobody else upset and 0:10:43.360 --> 0:10:46.360 enraged by this? And it just kind of hit everything, 0:10:46.400 --> 0:10:50.280 and I thought, oh, that's right, because you know, growing up, 0:10:50.360 --> 0:10:54.480 you just go, well, I'm I'm just going to make 0:10:54.520 --> 0:10:58.240 sure that I float will survive, or you know, swim here, 0:10:59.600 --> 0:11:02.000 and then you go, oh, I've been swimming like these 0:11:02.040 --> 0:11:03.400 white follows this whole time. 0:11:03.559 --> 0:11:05.440 Well, that's what I wanted to ask. 0:11:05.520 --> 0:11:08.199 You spoke about privilege, you know, and I think that 0:11:08.200 --> 0:11:10.840 that's something that will be, you know, shocking to hear 0:11:10.920 --> 0:11:12.840 for some of our listeners that a black fellow is 0:11:12.840 --> 0:11:14.880 talking about the privilege they had, because a lot of 0:11:14.960 --> 0:11:18.280 the time we get painted with this disadvantage brush, or 0:11:18.679 --> 0:11:21.720 you know, we're talking about the challenges. You so openly 0:11:21.720 --> 0:11:24.120 speak about this privilege that you grew up with. 0:11:24.480 --> 0:11:25.800 What did that look like for you? 0:11:25.840 --> 0:11:28.600 And how have you used it to combat those our 0:11:28.679 --> 0:11:29.800 challenges as a community. 0:11:30.559 --> 0:11:32.760 Well, I think it's one of these things where there's 0:11:32.800 --> 0:11:36.000 it's always a double sided coin, right, because I recognize 0:11:36.240 --> 0:11:40.240 just by one, I'm light skin, Two I grew up 0:11:40.400 --> 0:11:43.959 in a white suburb, so I spoke like white follows. 0:11:44.240 --> 0:11:48.280 And three my parents had a successful business, right, and 0:11:48.360 --> 0:11:53.520 so I could operate in that world without people questioning 0:11:53.559 --> 0:11:55.880 me too much, or at least I didn't question them 0:11:55.960 --> 0:12:00.040 questioning it because you just want to fit right. But 0:12:00.080 --> 0:12:02.520 the other side of that is that it came with 0:12:02.600 --> 0:12:08.840 a lot of negative or the disadvantages. Like I grew 0:12:08.880 --> 0:12:12.240 up in Brisbane, away from country. The suburb that we 0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:14.360 were in didn't have a lot of black ballers in it. 0:12:14.640 --> 0:12:16.440 Me and my brothers were the only black kids at 0:12:16.480 --> 0:12:22.720 the school. It was so whitewashed. If I ever questioned things, 0:12:23.040 --> 0:12:26.000 I was really the odd one out. It required me 0:12:26.040 --> 0:12:27.560 to have a lot of bravery that I didn't know 0:12:27.600 --> 0:12:31.920 how to inhibit at a young age. And it also 0:12:32.000 --> 0:12:36.760 meant that, yeah that I think I had to do 0:12:36.800 --> 0:12:41.880 a lot of the sort of cultural journey exploration. 0:12:42.559 --> 0:12:44.000 Yeah yeah, and it's. 0:12:43.840 --> 0:12:46.680 After you've kind of tried to carve out your identity 0:12:46.679 --> 0:12:50.920 as a person and so then it's kind of tainted 0:12:50.920 --> 0:12:52.760 with this, Oh my god, am I doing this correctly? 0:12:53.320 --> 0:12:56.440 And that's kind of been what's plagued me through my career. 0:12:56.480 --> 0:13:00.400 I think it's just that identity struggle of I'm who 0:13:00.440 --> 0:13:02.319 I am, and I know that I don't need to 0:13:02.360 --> 0:13:06.960 earn my blackness, but I don't like that it failure 0:13:07.040 --> 0:13:12.920 thinks that my blackness is somehow undermined by what I've 0:13:13.000 --> 0:13:15.640 what I've been through, because actually, my mum was so 0:13:15.679 --> 0:13:18.440 passionate about making sure that we had access to everything 0:13:19.240 --> 0:13:23.280 because of all of the access that that my ancestors 0:13:23.280 --> 0:13:23.679 didn't have. 0:13:24.800 --> 0:13:29.600 You know, yeah, I wonder if you use that insight 0:13:29.679 --> 0:13:31.560 that you had all that privilege that you talk about, 0:13:31.679 --> 0:13:35.240 as you know, weapons within your comedy to make fun 0:13:35.360 --> 0:13:36.760 of white fellas. 0:13:36.800 --> 0:13:44.120 And here's the whole thing, right, It's like, I think 0:13:44.200 --> 0:13:46.520 the what made comedy really hard as well is that 0:13:46.600 --> 0:13:50.439 I remember kind of having this conversation with myself about 0:13:51.000 --> 0:13:56.880 like who's my audience, and going, you know what black 0:13:56.880 --> 0:13:59.360 Father's going to put me? Always I'm black, I know 0:13:59.480 --> 0:14:02.160 what it's like to be black. And then I thought 0:14:03.280 --> 0:14:04.960 the people who I really want to hit between the 0:14:05.000 --> 0:14:08.240 eyes or white follows, but to hid them between the eyes, 0:14:08.280 --> 0:14:10.160 you got to get them to watch. And so it 0:14:10.320 --> 0:14:13.120 was like it was a really hard line to walk of, 0:14:13.200 --> 0:14:15.360 like I don't want to whitewash myself, but at the 0:14:15.360 --> 0:14:18.320 same time, I'm not preaching to the converted, because I 0:14:18.360 --> 0:14:20.680 know that I can go out into the community and 0:14:21.240 --> 0:14:23.280 do whatever I want to do, like because I can, 0:14:23.840 --> 0:14:26.360 I know how to talk with black fallows. But as 0:14:26.400 --> 0:14:29.160 soon as you kind of make a decision almost in 0:14:29.200 --> 0:14:32.560 your head to try and attack the mainstream, it does 0:14:32.600 --> 0:14:37.120 feel like you've lost part of your strength as a 0:14:37.120 --> 0:14:38.680 black woman. But I don't know, it was all of 0:14:38.680 --> 0:14:41.200 that stuff, and it just you know, when it's acting 0:14:41.200 --> 0:14:44.120 and stuff like that, you can put your little sank 0:14:44.160 --> 0:14:47.480 on it, but when it's stand up, every word is 0:14:47.520 --> 0:14:48.000 part of it. 0:14:48.480 --> 0:14:49.120 Yeah. 0:14:49.160 --> 0:14:50.920 I feel like Maddie and I feel the same way 0:14:50.920 --> 0:14:58.120 in that sense, like we know, like we know whoere audience, 0:14:58.240 --> 0:15:02.120 our audience is. We're trying to like get you know, 0:15:03.120 --> 0:15:08.520 the white people to white the white people gathers the 0:15:08.720 --> 0:15:12.760 watchers to listen to the same like our podcast per 0:15:12.760 --> 0:15:15.920 se because as an example, it's like how do we 0:15:16.600 --> 0:15:20.560 not cater ourselves to that? But because like innately we're 0:15:20.840 --> 0:15:23.360 black and we're really proud and we're like, you know, 0:15:23.720 --> 0:15:25.040 we know who we are. 0:15:25.320 --> 0:15:26.920 But it's like, how do we get other people to 0:15:27.000 --> 0:15:31.000 listen like we get really yeah, right. 0:15:31.000 --> 0:15:34.640 Because you've got a normal Like I was laughing when 0:15:34.640 --> 0:15:36.800 I did the broadcast Bernado. I had to laugh because 0:15:36.800 --> 0:15:40.440 I was like, you know, it's real friendly to be 0:15:40.520 --> 0:15:43.720 black right now, like man no galic creative got their 0:15:43.720 --> 0:15:46.960 reusable bags and coals like which is deadly. I love 0:15:47.320 --> 0:15:50.040 from Nongala. But I had to laugh because I was like, 0:15:50.640 --> 0:15:53.640 but still, it's like people don't really know us or 0:15:53.680 --> 0:15:56.520 really listen, right, And so I said, look, you want 0:15:56.520 --> 0:15:58.200 to know how much they don't listen. He's a live 0:15:58.240 --> 0:16:00.560 broadcast on ABC, and I'm going to say and they 0:16:00.640 --> 0:16:05.480 got no rules and the crowd loved it. But people 0:16:05.520 --> 0:16:10.400 at home going swear, yeah, yeah, was. 0:16:10.320 --> 0:16:18.320 It Nookie that said boodoo on? Yes, Yes, that's so funny. 0:16:17.880 --> 0:16:21.720 Quoting and speaks. I'm like, oh gosh, that is amazing. 0:16:21.880 --> 0:16:24.720 That was that was life changing. 0:16:26.560 --> 0:16:28.360 Actually, the funny thing is, you know, I have a 0:16:28.440 --> 0:16:30.920 saying stuff and maybe this is also playing. 0:16:31.560 --> 0:16:32.720 I guess what you're talking is. 0:16:32.720 --> 0:16:37.480 Like I think if you don't laugh, you'll cry, and exactly, 0:16:37.480 --> 0:16:39.200 and I think, like, you know what, just laugh it 0:16:39.200 --> 0:16:41.640 off because you laugh, you won't cry. 0:16:41.960 --> 0:16:44.480 My over here is the full spectrum of emotion. She 0:16:44.560 --> 0:16:47.200 loves to laugh and cry the same time. 0:16:47.520 --> 0:16:50.600 Yes, but I think my dad's y at. 0:16:50.480 --> 0:16:55.600 The moment, and we we I think we quote Uncle 0:16:56.160 --> 0:17:00.360 Ernie didn't go he says something about like when you 0:17:00.400 --> 0:17:04.520 start laughing at yourself, that's when the healing can start. 0:17:06.240 --> 0:17:09.840 Yeah, but it's so true. And like my family, Like 0:17:09.920 --> 0:17:13.720 my family, they're all weirdos. We always laugh at difficult 0:17:13.760 --> 0:17:14.840 but like the harder. 0:17:14.640 --> 0:17:20.000 Ay, even normal normal does not exist. I hate this 0:17:20.040 --> 0:17:20.800 thing of like. 0:17:21.080 --> 0:17:24.920 Being normal, Like I'm it's better. 0:17:24.800 --> 0:17:26.159 Than a normal person. 0:17:26.800 --> 0:17:32.120 Who who Yeah, yeah, I mean, I just love when 0:17:32.160 --> 0:17:35.080 black follows are together. Like I had an experience where, 0:17:35.320 --> 0:17:37.560 you know, I was at an award show and I 0:17:37.560 --> 0:17:39.600 was feeling quite uncomfortable. I was feeling like a bit 0:17:39.640 --> 0:17:41.119 out of place. This was not long ago, this a 0:17:41.160 --> 0:17:42.920 couple of weeks ago, and I was feeling like, oh, 0:17:42.960 --> 0:17:44.440 I really didn't want to be there. But as soon 0:17:44.480 --> 0:17:47.520 as I found my crew, I laughed. It was you know, 0:17:47.680 --> 0:17:51.800 the poorer. It was Barker and Barker's Barker's mob who 0:17:51.800 --> 0:17:54.399 were there. We laughed for a good hour straight. I 0:17:54.560 --> 0:17:58.200 left there just on a high, like I had taken 0:17:58.280 --> 0:18:03.240 drugs and black Joy for me, like filled my cup 0:18:03.280 --> 0:18:05.680 immediately and I could, like I swear, I could live 0:18:05.720 --> 0:18:07.600 off that feeling for the rest of my life. 0:18:07.640 --> 0:18:13.320 Like you mentioned their uncle Ernie Dingo, funniest moment I 0:18:13.359 --> 0:18:15.600 went to the Logis a couple of years ago, that 0:18:15.840 --> 0:18:19.560 infamous annoying interview that we had was up with You, Maddie, 0:18:20.000 --> 0:18:22.359 where I was like I found I didn't know I 0:18:22.440 --> 0:18:24.560 was being recorded. I was like, I just suck this 0:18:24.720 --> 0:18:25.640 dress it just a bit. 0:18:26.240 --> 0:18:28.800 Yes, Yes, that was me. 0:18:30.880 --> 0:18:33.040 When I was feeling really like out of place. 0:18:33.119 --> 0:18:34.800 And it was on the Gold Coast, wasn't it. 0:18:35.000 --> 0:18:35.960 Yeah? Yeah, Gold Coast. 0:18:36.040 --> 0:18:36.840 Yeah. 0:18:36.880 --> 0:18:40.280 And then we're in the we're in the hotel like 0:18:40.520 --> 0:18:42.840 waiting to they got the limos to pick us up 0:18:42.840 --> 0:18:44.760 and that, and we're in the hotel and I'm kind 0:18:44.760 --> 0:18:49.120 of standing there alone and Uncle Ernie walks downstairs. Hey, 0:18:49.600 --> 0:18:58.200 my face into one corner and we were all just laughing. 0:18:58.440 --> 0:19:01.240 And then when we rock up there it was me, 0:19:02.640 --> 0:19:06.760 Tony Armstrong, Dead Maulman, and I think it was just 0:19:06.880 --> 0:19:09.520 us through somebody else anyway. And they had these little 0:19:09.560 --> 0:19:12.720 golden golf carts with people all dressed up in golf 0:19:13.000 --> 0:19:14.479 and we were like, we're getting in one of them, 0:19:14.520 --> 0:19:16.240 and everybody else was ignoring them, and I was like, 0:19:16.400 --> 0:19:18.119 we're getting in one of them. So we jump in 0:19:18.160 --> 0:19:21.240 and we're waving up the window going goodbybe plans and 0:19:21.240 --> 0:19:24.040 then we realised the golf cart drove us for forty 0:19:24.080 --> 0:19:26.080 meters and it was the most embarrassed. It was like 0:19:26.160 --> 0:19:27.679 as slow as everybody walking. 0:19:31.680 --> 0:19:34.359 That is myiconic. 0:19:35.480 --> 0:19:37.119 You know when you do see a black collow in 0:19:37.160 --> 0:19:39.560 that space or in the in this industry, there is 0:19:39.560 --> 0:19:42.439 that safe element of all look, let's band together. You know, 0:19:42.520 --> 0:19:45.320 we can protect each other in this vibe, in this moment. 0:19:45.359 --> 0:19:47.639 But for you in comedy, it must be even worse. 0:19:47.680 --> 0:19:49.879 I mean, as a First Nations woman in comedy, does it, 0:19:50.280 --> 0:19:53.120 you know, get any more isolating than that? Well? 0:19:53.160 --> 0:19:54.760 I mean like I did a lot of touring with 0:19:54.840 --> 0:19:57.479 the Aboriginal comedy All Stars, which was my favorite thing 0:19:57.520 --> 0:20:00.800 in the whole world. Like there's a comedian and Crepinery 0:20:01.800 --> 0:20:05.000 and Andy Saunders as well, and their real mentors to 0:20:05.040 --> 0:20:10.000 me just uncles who who just you know. I always 0:20:10.000 --> 0:20:14.239 had this fear that I wasn't I'd left it too 0:20:14.359 --> 0:20:18.400 late to fit or something because of how I grew 0:20:18.480 --> 0:20:20.680 up or something. And they were like, no, you don't know. 0:20:20.720 --> 0:20:24.160 And your blackness is like that's in your blood, that's 0:20:24.200 --> 0:20:26.640 in your skin, your bones, your spirit, like your old 0:20:26.640 --> 0:20:30.240 people give you that and so they kind of, you know, 0:20:30.359 --> 0:20:33.200 really celebrated the diversity that we had within the group, 0:20:33.760 --> 0:20:36.120 and that was something I was really passionate about as well. 0:20:36.119 --> 0:20:38.280 It's like, we have a lot of MOB who do 0:20:38.359 --> 0:20:43.320 grow up in metropolitan areas feeling disconnected and it doesn't 0:20:43.440 --> 0:20:47.000 undermine our blackness and who we are and the ways 0:20:47.000 --> 0:20:51.439 we represent MOB because it's not our fault that policies. 0:20:52.000 --> 0:20:54.520 You know that there was choices that had to be 0:20:54.840 --> 0:20:57.320 you know, I mean, you guys get it. But I 0:20:57.400 --> 0:20:59.639 got to deal with the All Stars a lot, and 0:20:59.680 --> 0:21:02.720