WEBVTT - #2139 What Am I Capable Of? - Andrew May 0:00:00.440 --> 0:00:02.640 I get a team. It's HARP. So I hope you're terrific. 0:00:02.720 --> 0:00:06.760 Welcome to another installment of the new project. And by 0:00:06.800 --> 0:00:10.040 that I mean kind of. So I did a chat 0:00:10.039 --> 0:00:11.760 the other day, or I had a chat the other day. 0:00:11.800 --> 0:00:13.160 Do you do a chat? And I think you have 0:00:13.200 --> 0:00:15.080 a chat harps. I had a chat the other day 0:00:15.120 --> 0:00:19.279 with very brilliant Andrew May from the very brilliant Performance 0:00:19.400 --> 0:00:25.560 Intelligence podcast. I really liked it. But I'm only me 0:00:25.840 --> 0:00:29.360 and my experience is subjective. You might hate it, but 0:00:29.440 --> 0:00:31.960 I think it was good. He got really good feedback 0:00:31.960 --> 0:00:34.960 from it. And we're doing what the kids call a 0:00:35.080 --> 0:00:39.800 co share here on typ is sometimes I'm on someone's 0:00:39.800 --> 0:00:41.800 show or they're on my show and we both have 0:00:41.840 --> 0:00:47.599 a podcast, and both both podcasts rate reasonably well, and 0:00:47.640 --> 0:00:49.800 so we decide to do a co share if we 0:00:50.000 --> 0:00:52.800 like the quality of what we put out. This is 0:00:52.880 --> 0:00:56.040 such an occasion. Andrew and I have been friends forever, 0:00:56.440 --> 0:00:59.920 and we kind of cross paths a lot. We're speaking 0:01:00.080 --> 0:01:03.560 and lots of other work. But anyway, so this is 0:01:03.640 --> 0:01:07.399 great chat. I think I hope you enjoy it. I 0:01:07.440 --> 0:01:09.520 love catching up with you, I love your show, I 0:01:09.560 --> 0:01:11.800 love everything about you. So it's good to get together, 0:01:12.360 --> 0:01:14.959 and we should probably get together in three D one 0:01:15.040 --> 0:01:17.400 day and see what that's like. But for now we'll 0:01:17.440 --> 0:01:19.480 deal with the virtual kind of version. 0:01:19.400 --> 0:01:22.320 Mutual admiration society. We were chatting earlier this week about 0:01:22.319 --> 0:01:25.200 this topic and we both lit up. Would be remiss 0:01:25.240 --> 0:01:28.640 of us as middle aged male podcast hosts sitting here 0:01:28.880 --> 0:01:31.160 think we had our shit together all the time. Why 0:01:31.200 --> 0:01:33.479 don't you lead? And I got an example as. 0:01:33.400 --> 0:01:36.679 Well, well, yeah, I wish, I wish I was middle aged, 0:01:36.720 --> 0:01:40.240 by the way, I think if I lived to one 0:01:40.319 --> 0:01:42.880 hundred and ninety four on middle age, run. 0:01:43.200 --> 0:01:45.880 Run with it. Because look I hear' I'll from this. 0:01:45.959 --> 0:01:49.639 I look at you. Your podcast is out of this world. 0:01:49.800 --> 0:01:54.400 You have middians downloads, you run courses and you put 0:01:54.400 --> 0:01:56.800 a notice and it fills up straight away. You've written books, 0:01:57.440 --> 0:02:01.200 You've done TV, You've been strength and conditioning coage for 0:02:01.240 --> 0:02:04.920 some very high profile teams. You train big names, like 0:02:05.040 --> 0:02:07.800 if you look at that extrinsic or that external measure 0:02:07.840 --> 0:02:09.160 of success, you're killing it. 0:02:09.880 --> 0:02:13.320 Yeah, thank you. Do you know what I was really 0:02:13.919 --> 0:02:16.160 fascinated with this sense I was a kid. I didn't know, 0:02:16.600 --> 0:02:19.720 you know, the performance capacity gap. As Andrew said everyone, 0:02:19.720 --> 0:02:23.160 it's really like what you're currently doing, what's your current output? 0:02:23.200 --> 0:02:25.600 What are your outcomes? Like, where are you at with 0:02:25.960 --> 0:02:28.600 pick a variable in your life, whether it not it's 0:02:29.160 --> 0:02:31.720 how fit or strong, or what you're doing with your 0:02:31.720 --> 0:02:34.760 dough or your relationships or how your business is going, 0:02:34.840 --> 0:02:37.920 and it can be any component of the human experience, 0:02:38.080 --> 0:02:40.720 And then what is your potential? I think this is 0:02:41.200 --> 0:02:45.080 one of the few times that I advise people for comparison. 0:02:45.520 --> 0:02:48.320 It's like, we're not comparing Andrew with Craig or vice versa, 0:02:48.400 --> 0:02:50.880 or you with anyone else. But what we're we're comparing 0:02:51.000 --> 0:02:55.200 is current you with potential you or possible you, Like 0:02:55.280 --> 0:03:00.160 what is possible for me? And I think everyone thinks 0:03:00.240 --> 0:03:03.639 about that at some stage. And so my genesis story 0:03:03.680 --> 0:03:06.079 with this is I won't bang on about it too 0:03:06.120 --> 0:03:08.000 long because I've done it too many times. But when 0:03:08.040 --> 0:03:11.280 I was the fat fourteen year old and I was, 0:03:11.560 --> 0:03:13.600 you know, morbally, I be fat, aest kid in my school, 0:03:13.639 --> 0:03:16.000 and then over a course of not that many months, 0:03:16.000 --> 0:03:21.040 four or five, I totally transformed my body, more motivated 0:03:21.080 --> 0:03:22.960 by what I didn't want to be than what I 0:03:23.040 --> 0:03:24.840 was hoping to be. I just didn't want to be 0:03:24.919 --> 0:03:29.040 pick last anymore. I just didn't want to be socially invisible. 0:03:29.080 --> 0:03:31.040 I didn't want to be made fun of. All those 0:03:31.080 --> 0:03:34.600 things which were a compelling force for me. But when 0:03:34.639 --> 0:03:37.280 I lost weight and I got quite fit and quite 0:03:37.360 --> 0:03:40.600 strong and quite healthy, and you know, with what I 0:03:40.680 --> 0:03:43.560 had to work with my genetics, I would say I 0:03:43.720 --> 0:03:47.200 started to get somewhere in the ballpark of optimizing close 0:03:47.320 --> 0:03:50.400 to what I had. But the biggest thing for me 0:03:50.640 --> 0:03:58.640 was this kind of new awareness or understanding of my capacity, like, oh, 0:03:58.680 --> 0:04:01.160 even though I'm not super small, or I don't have brilliant, 0:04:01.160 --> 0:04:04.800 amazing genetics, or I'm not a great athlete, or I'm whatever, 0:04:04.880 --> 0:04:07.680 I don't have a I'm not a creative genius, or 0:04:07.760 --> 0:04:10.440 all of these things that I can recognize without beating 0:04:10.440 --> 0:04:13.200 myself up. But just go, well, Craig, you don't have 0:04:13.280 --> 0:04:16.120 awesome genetics, But what can you do with those genetics? 0:04:16.360 --> 0:04:18.599 What can you do with that mind that you have? 0:04:19.279 --> 0:04:22.680 Maybe you're clever in a different way. Maybe your brilliance, 0:04:22.760 --> 0:04:25.800 if you have it, doesn't exist in the classroom, you know, 0:04:26.080 --> 0:04:29.440 and all of that stuff about what can I do 0:04:29.600 --> 0:04:33.159 versus what am I doing? And so the biggest light 0:04:33.200 --> 0:04:36.600 bulb or revelation. For me in the changing my body 0:04:37.040 --> 0:04:40.559 process wasn't even about my body. It was about getting 0:04:40.640 --> 0:04:44.400 a glimpse into my own potential and my own possibilities 0:04:44.440 --> 0:04:47.800 and for this conversation, my own capacity. 0:04:48.720 --> 0:04:51.360 That's young to have that awareness, because a lot of 0:04:51.680 --> 0:04:53.800 people that you and I would work with don't have 0:04:53.800 --> 0:04:55.640 that awareness. In the fifty sixties and even. 0:04:55.480 --> 0:04:58.240 Beyond, well, I didn't think of it in the you know, 0:04:58.320 --> 0:05:04.600 I wasn't you were quoting performance, but I mean, if 0:05:04.600 --> 0:05:09.240 I was craigifying, I'd go, fuck, how did I do that? Well? 0:05:09.279 --> 0:05:12.000 If I can do this, then what else can I do? 0:05:12.440 --> 0:05:14.400 And there was no ego in that. There was just 0:05:14.520 --> 0:05:18.160 excitement and awareness and I guess a new level of 0:05:18.279 --> 0:05:23.760 understanding about how I'd thought for fourteen years and how 0:05:23.760 --> 0:05:28.680 I was starting to think about myself and my possibilities now. 0:05:29.640 --> 0:05:32.240 And so I went, well, I can I can't have 0:05:32.360 --> 0:05:36.479 better genetics than Andrew, but I can outtrain Andrew. I 0:05:36.520 --> 0:05:38.919 can eat better than Andrew. I can sleep better, I 0:05:38.960 --> 0:05:41.320 can try harder, I can put up with more pain. 0:05:41.880 --> 0:05:45.000 All of those things I can just choose. I can 0:05:45.080 --> 0:05:48.320 recover better, I can learn more, I can educate myself. 0:05:48.360 --> 0:05:51.839 I can build a relationship with food that I didn't 0:05:51.880 --> 0:05:56.240 have before, because my relationship with food was horrendous, my 0:05:56.360 --> 0:06:00.160 relationship with my own kind of emotions like that, there 0:06:00.200 --> 0:06:03.600 was no bigger hater of me than me. I'm like, well, 0:06:03.600 --> 0:06:06.240 that actually doesn't work well, Like there was so much 0:06:06.320 --> 0:06:11.039 self loathing and self doubt and self sabotage. I'm like, 0:06:11.240 --> 0:06:13.479 why am I doing that? And then I'm not a 0:06:13.520 --> 0:06:16.960 redundant question, why am I doing that? No? Actually, why 0:06:17.160 --> 0:06:19.880 am I doing that? What is that about? And I think, 0:06:20.480 --> 0:06:25.400 you know, better questions can lead to much greater self 0:06:25.440 --> 0:06:29.839 awareness and better choices and better behaviors and better outcomes. So, 0:06:30.960 --> 0:06:33.040 you know, back in the day, I didn't articulate it 0:06:33.120 --> 0:06:34.680 like this, and I didn't even know there was a 0:06:34.760 --> 0:06:38.039 thing called the performance capacity gap. And I couldn't really 0:06:38.080 --> 0:06:42.280 explain to you what success was or what potential was. 0:06:42.320 --> 0:06:46.960 But I just knew that the biggest variable. I didn't 0:06:47.000 --> 0:06:49.240 know what a variable was, but I knew that the 0:06:49.279 --> 0:06:52.080 biggest thing that was going to make a difference in 0:06:52.120 --> 0:06:56.680 my life was actually me, not any external kind of force. 0:06:56.839 --> 0:06:59.760 You know, do you think it's hard to go back 0:07:00.000 --> 0:07:01.680 when you were fourteen? But if you can try and 0:07:01.720 --> 0:07:06.520 transport back to the feelings you had, the emotions you had, 0:07:06.560 --> 0:07:10.200 the thoughts you had. Do you think because you went 0:07:10.240 --> 0:07:12.320 through that hardship and it would have been tough. And 0:07:12.360 --> 0:07:14.200 I've heard you talk about this a lot on the podcast, 0:07:14.960 --> 0:07:17.160 that you just had pain, you were just sick of 0:07:17.200 --> 0:07:19.800 that and went, fucker, I'm going to tap into something 0:07:20.000 --> 0:07:23.760 to prove everyone wrong. Or was it to prove yourself right? 0:07:24.160 --> 0:07:25.520 Or was there some different motivation. 0:07:26.280 --> 0:07:30.560 I was probably motivated more through insecurity and fear. I 0:07:30.600 --> 0:07:33.720 didn't want to prove anyone wrong. Really, I just once 0:07:33.760 --> 0:07:36.040 I did that, I kind of it was almost like 0:07:36.080 --> 0:07:40.480 this constant question, even probably till now. But like when 0:07:40.480 --> 0:07:44.120 I set up Austray's first personal training center, most and 0:07:44.160 --> 0:07:46.840 this is you know, people go, oh everyone hated on MYA. 0:07:46.840 --> 0:07:49.880 It wasn't that, It was just that nobody really thought 0:07:49.960 --> 0:07:52.720 that was a thing. I mean, we're talking nineteen eighty 0:07:52.800 --> 0:07:55.720 six when I first started thinking of this forty years ago, 0:07:56.280 --> 0:07:58.440 and I didn't open it until nineteen and ninety, so 0:07:58.440 --> 0:08:01.400 it took four years to go from concept to reality. 0:08:01.520 --> 0:08:04.320 But you know all of that where I thought, oh, well, 0:08:04.400 --> 0:08:06.760 I actually think I could do this. I think and 0:08:06.800 --> 0:08:08.600 of course someone would have done it if I didn't 0:08:08.640 --> 0:08:11.320 do it, So there's there's no kind of boasting in this, 0:08:11.480 --> 0:08:16.400 but trying to understand, well, what can I do if 0:08:16.440 --> 0:08:18.440 I can get out of my own way, and even 0:08:18.480 --> 0:08:20.520 if it doesn't work, that's okay. I'm going to learn, 0:08:20.560 --> 0:08:22.800 I'm going to grow, I'm going to evolve. I put 0:08:22.880 --> 0:08:26.120 up a post the other day about my first corporate 0:08:26.200 --> 0:08:29.440 speaking gig in Inverted Commas. I also happened to be 0:08:29.480 --> 0:08:32.000 twenty six, which was when I opened my first center, 0:08:32.640 --> 0:08:37.120 and I was fucking terrible. I spoke to twenty guys 0:08:37.160 --> 0:08:40.280 at a timber yard. I spoke in the lunch room. 0:08:41.040 --> 0:08:43.760 I spoke for half an hour. I got paid fifty dollars. 0:08:44.120 --> 0:08:48.040 I prepared for three weeks, and I crashed and burned horribly. 0:08:48.240 --> 0:08:50.559 I was so bad, and they couldn't get out of 0:08:50.600 --> 0:08:53.120 there quick enough. They only stayed there because the boss 0:08:53.200 --> 0:08:54.679 was there and they felt compelled. 0:08:54.760 --> 0:08:56.960 Right, But can I say, as a fellow speaker, for 0:08:57.080 --> 0:08:59.120 your first gig, to be in a timberyard with a 0:08:59.120 --> 0:09:02.959 bunch of blokes name Louis Moose, Kanker, Bifo and Smash, 0:09:03.120 --> 0:09:06.840 They'll think, and who's this young punk buff idiot. That's 0:09:06.880 --> 0:09:10.040 a tough introduction. Good introduction, but a tough one. 0:09:10.440 --> 0:09:13.520 But here's the thing, Like, and I know this sounds cliche, 0:09:13.559 --> 0:09:15.960 but when we get past the cheese and the self 0:09:16.000 --> 0:09:18.920 help and the fluff and the motivation, and of course 0:09:18.960 --> 0:09:20.880 there's good and bad pain. But like for me, that 0:09:21.000 --> 0:09:24.160 was a good pain. That was that was good discomfort, 0:09:24.240 --> 0:09:27.440 that was good. I learned a bunch even in that 0:09:27.559 --> 0:09:29.480 about what to do, what not to do. You know, 0:09:29.840 --> 0:09:32.760 how much stories do I share? And how much information? 0:09:32.920 --> 0:09:35.800 And how do I build rapport and connection? And what 0:09:35.880 --> 0:09:37.920 language should have I used? And what did you know? 0:09:38.160 --> 0:09:40.320 Like that gives you a chance to figure out what 0:09:40.440 --> 0:09:43.480 went okay, what went terrible, and what I would never 0:09:43.559 --> 0:09:46.520 do again. But you can't get good at what you're 0:09:46.559 --> 0:09:50.400 not doing. But the problem is that people want to 0:09:50.400 --> 0:09:53.240 be excellent without the pain. People want to be at 0:09:53.280 --> 0:09:57.120 the top of the mountain without fucking climbing the mountain. Right, 0:09:57.600 --> 0:10:00.680 So dude, of course you'll get the i'ming the mountain 0:10:00.840 --> 0:10:04.920 sucks literally and metaphorically. But how do you build exit, Like, 0:10:05.000 --> 0:10:08.200 if you're not super talented like me, how do you 0:10:08.280 --> 0:10:11.640 get good? How do you become exceptional and not just 0:10:11.679 --> 0:10:14.200 for the sake of being that will. But how you 0:10:14.200 --> 0:10:17.560 become exceptional is by doing what most people won't do. 0:10:17.840 --> 0:10:21.600 So your behavior is exceptional. Like what will most people do? 0:10:22.080 --> 0:10:23.960 I tell you what. They will not work as hard 0:10:24.000 --> 0:10:25.920 as I worked, or for as long as I work. 0:10:26.000 --> 0:10:28.640 They will not deal with They will not deal with 0:10:28.679 --> 0:10:31.320 the discomfort that I dealed with. Some will, and some 0:10:31.400 --> 0:10:34.880 will do it better, but the majority won't. And I 0:10:34.920 --> 0:10:36.800 hate to say this, but I'm seeing this more and 0:10:36.840 --> 0:10:40.000 more in twenty twenty six, where if I said to 0:10:40.040 --> 0:10:42.080 an audience of two hundred people, put up your hand 0:10:42.120 --> 0:10:44.200 if you want to be more resilient, everyone puts up 0:10:44.240 --> 0:10:46.360 their hand, and then you go, who's going to do 0:10:46.400 --> 0:10:50.000 the work to create that? Fucking nobody? Everyone dives under 0:10:50.040 --> 0:10:52.200 their seat, And that's because. 0:10:52.000 --> 0:10:54.280 Give me an app Isn't there something you can download? 0:10:54.720 --> 0:10:57.160 Their appeal is they're a powder? Is there? You know? 0:10:57.400 --> 0:11:00.680 And that's not everyone, of course, But I think it's 0:11:00.760 --> 0:11:05.520 so important that we are prepared to and it doesn't 0:11:05.559 --> 0:11:08.240 need to be an hourly practice, but go you know what. 0:11:09.559 --> 0:11:11.680 And the metaphor, of course, or the analogy is in 0:11:11.720 --> 0:11:14.280 the gym, how do you get strong? You work against resistance, 0:11:14.320 --> 0:11:16.600 and we've spoken about this. You do hardship, and the 0:11:16.600 --> 0:11:19.440 byproduct is you get strong. Literally, how do you build 0:11:19.520 --> 0:11:22.520 muscular endurance and aerobic durance? You do hardshit. How do 0:11:22.559 --> 0:11:26.040 you build capacity do hardshit? How do you build resilience? 0:11:26.080 --> 0:11:29.160 You do hardshit? You know, And so it's not like 0:11:29.400 --> 0:11:33.080 this is a no cost situation. So that whole thing 0:11:33.160 --> 0:11:35.120 is spilled over into the rest of my life, mate, 0:11:35.200 --> 0:11:38.679 and I get more excited about other people's potential than 0:11:38.679 --> 0:11:39.880 mine these days. 0:11:40.240 --> 0:11:42.960 But you're living it yourself through helping others. That's called 0:11:43.000 --> 0:11:46.160 being on purpose. You find purpose, you find something bigger 0:11:46.160 --> 0:11:47.880 than you were excites to living daylights out of here, 0:11:48.679 --> 0:11:51.240 and it's future focused. So I can totally see you're 0:11:51.240 --> 0:11:53.720 on purpose. And you explain that story. It helps me 0:11:53.800 --> 0:11:55.880 understand a bit more because I've listened to your podcast 0:11:56.080 --> 0:11:58.120 a bunch of times, lots and lots of times. And 0:11:58.120 --> 0:12:00.199 when I hear you say I was a fact kid 0:12:00.200 --> 0:12:02.400 from Mawha, I'm not really great. I used to sometimes 0:12:02.440 --> 0:12:04.720 think I was Harps just downloading that because he's always 0:12:04.720 --> 0:12:07.520 been this naturally gifted dude. You know what I'm saying. 0:12:07.520 --> 0:12:10.000 You probably had some other people say this as well, 0:12:10.120 --> 0:12:14.640 but that hardship in you forged a hardiness to quote 0:12:14.640 --> 0:12:16.800 out mate Paul Taylor, and then you had the physical 0:12:16.800 --> 0:12:19.760 and psychological resources to tap into it. This is hard 0:12:19.800 --> 0:12:22.760 as a parent, and any parent or people who are 0:12:22.800 --> 0:12:26.240 involved with kids and extended capacity will know this. What 0:12:26.280 --> 0:12:27.960 do you want your kids? You want them to be 0:12:28.160 --> 0:12:30.920 loved and to be in a good environment and to 0:12:30.960 --> 0:12:33.160 feel good. What's the worst thing you can do for 0:12:33.160 --> 0:12:36.559 your kids? Everything? Because they become precocious of lass holes, 0:12:36.920 --> 0:12:38.760 And it's hard as a parent, mate, because you want 0:12:38.760 --> 0:12:40.560 to give the kids everything, but we know when you do, 0:12:41.120 --> 0:12:44.120 you're actually doing them a disservice. So I think a 0:12:44.200 --> 0:12:48.640 big thing about this performance and capacity gap is just 0:12:48.679 --> 0:12:50.840 having a bit of drive and like you had it 0:12:50.880 --> 0:12:53.200 as a young kid. So for me, my story as 0:12:53.240 --> 0:12:56.400 a middle distance run I was good, not great, So 0:12:56.559 --> 0:13:00.040 a bit of a shift on your story, but a 0:13:00.080 --> 0:13:04.079 similar theme meaning I won multiple state championships, I went 0:13:04.080 --> 0:13:07.040 down to Tasmania the Institute of Sport, I did my 0:13:07.320 --> 0:13:10.840 best races in low keymates, So if I'm looking out 0:13:10.880 --> 0:13:13.320 of one hundred, do you give a mark on this? 0:13:13.400 --> 0:13:15.560 Do you give when you're talking to people? I give 0:13:15.600 --> 0:13:17.679 him a mark out of one hundred or ten as 0:13:17.679 --> 0:13:19.079 an example. Have you ever worked on that? 0:13:19.640 --> 0:13:22.040 It depends what we're doing, but I do have ways 0:13:22.080 --> 0:13:25.240 of quantifying things with people around different processes. 0:13:25.280 --> 0:13:27.439 But yes, so let's see if we look at your 0:13:27.480 --> 0:13:31.079 performance potential, if it was one hundred. As a runner, 0:13:31.120 --> 0:13:35.120 I probably hit sixty five or seventy. So I didn't 0:13:35.360 --> 0:13:38.600 close that delta. Got to a good level, not great, 0:13:38.640 --> 0:13:42.160 But when I was honest with myself, I liked running, 0:13:42.200 --> 0:13:44.120 but I love fitness and I love making a difference 0:13:44.120 --> 0:13:46.360 in other people's lives. And at twenty seven, I just went, look, 0:13:46.400 --> 0:13:47.719 I'm not going to do this for another couple of 0:13:47.800 --> 0:13:50.079 years and try and get to that next level because 0:13:50.120 --> 0:13:52.480 I was just I just wasn't really passionate about it. 0:13:52.679 --> 0:13:54.959 But what I was passionate about. I'd seen you speak 0:13:55.000 --> 0:13:57.720 at Farlax, I'd seen Matt Church, I'd seen the great 0:13:57.760 --> 0:14:00.280 man Doug Maloof and a bunch of other speed Because 0:14:00.360 --> 0:14:03.800 I went, I want to do that. So I shifted 0:14:03.920 --> 0:14:06.040 and went right, let's say if there's a score out 0:14:06.040 --> 0:14:08.720 of one hundred. As a speaker, you mentioned that presentation 0:14:08.800 --> 0:14:12.120 of the Timberyard, my first big presentation at FILEX was 0:14:12.200 --> 0:14:17.080 fucking woeful. It was ego driven, which was masking insecurity. 0:14:17.600 --> 0:14:19.120 I reckon. I had three hundred and fifty to four 0:14:19.200 --> 0:14:21.760 hundred people in the room and I was speaking about periodization. 0:14:21.880 --> 0:14:24.360 I made it really detailed, lots of slides, tried to 0:14:24.400 --> 0:14:27.480 show how much I knew, and literally half the audience 0:14:27.560 --> 0:14:29.440 left in the first fifteen minutes. I reckon. By the 0:14:29.480 --> 0:14:31.560 end of the hour, I had twenty percent of the audience. 0:14:31.920 --> 0:14:35.200 I was mortified. But the gap that I had mate 0:14:35.240 --> 0:14:39.040 between that performance and also that capacity was I'd seen you, 0:14:39.280 --> 0:14:43.000 Matt Dargan, others, and I did that presentation and I sucked. 0:14:43.640 --> 0:14:45.600 And there were one of two things I could have done, 0:14:45.760 --> 0:14:47.520 stick my head in the sand and go fuck it, 0:14:47.560 --> 0:14:50.560 I'm never presenting on the public platform again. Or the 0:14:50.600 --> 0:14:52.760 other one was I'm going to drill down and get 0:14:52.760 --> 0:14:54.480 good at this, and I chose the latter. And it's 0:14:54.520 --> 0:14:58.880 an evolution still to this day. I'm always learning. You 0:14:58.920 --> 0:15:01.600 don't arrive around the formans. I think, if you do, 0:15:01.800 --> 0:15:03.000 you stop. Yeah. 0:15:03.040 --> 0:15:05.080 I love that story. It's so true, And it's like 0:15:05.800 --> 0:15:09.240 all of this is just anecdotal. Everyone. These are my experiences, right, 0:15:09.680 --> 0:15:11.600 I don't have data on this, But I would think 0:15:11.640 --> 0:15:16.280 that seventy or eighty percent of the population really underestimate 0:15:16.320 --> 0:15:19.920 their capacity, their potential, their possibilities. They don't understand what 0:15:20.040 --> 0:15:23.280 they can do. I think so many people are limited 0:15:23.360 --> 0:15:27.880 by fear of a myriad of things. You know. It's like, oh, 0:15:28.000 --> 0:15:33.200 embrace failure, Well, do embrace failure? Because what's failure? Well, 0:15:33.240 --> 0:15:35.400 it's an outcome? Okay? Is it the outcome? You want 0:15:35.440 --> 0:15:38.480 to know? It's not? Did you learn anything? Like if 0:15:38.520 --> 0:15:41.240 you turn down the emotion and get a bit of 0:15:41.240 --> 0:15:43.880 a break between the failure in inverted commas and then 0:15:43.920 --> 0:15:47.360 the processing, It's like, I actually learned quite a few things, 0:15:47.400 --> 0:15:50.360 and you know, to go from where I was to 0:15:50.400 --> 0:15:52.920 where I am now working with you know, bigger teams 0:15:52.920 --> 0:15:55.480 and companies, and I've spoken all over the world. I've 0:15:55.480 --> 0:15:58.440 probably spoken in twenty countries and all of that. That's great. 0:15:58.520 --> 0:16:01.280 But to be able to stand on a stage and 0:16:01.320 --> 0:16:05.360 be competent, and to be doing a really good job 0:16:05.400 --> 0:16:07.840 and building rapport and connection and trust in the moment 0:16:07.880 --> 0:16:10.000 and know how to engage, and know how to tell 0:16:10.080 --> 0:16:12.600 stories and know how to read the room. And of 0:16:12.640 --> 0:16:15.720 course I don't always create outcomes, but that's been a 0:16:15.760 --> 0:16:19.440 forty year process or a thirty five year process. It's like, 0:16:19.720 --> 0:16:21.560 how do you become a black belt? Well, you get 0:16:21.640 --> 0:16:24.120 kicked in the dick a thousand times over ten years, 0:16:24.680 --> 0:16:28.120 right metaphorically, and you put up with the pain, and 0:16:28.120 --> 0:16:32.320 you be consistent, and you persevere, and you choose, you 0:16:32.480 --> 0:16:35.600 choose the hard thing, and you keep going back. And 0:16:35.680 --> 0:16:38.160 in the middle of all of that discomfort and joy 0:16:38.280 --> 0:16:42.640 and fun and evolution, you become a different version of you. 0:16:42.640 --> 0:16:44.640 You can't at twenty five go oh fuck, I'm going 0:16:44.680 --> 0:16:46.600 to be different by next Wednesday. No, you're not. You 0:16:46.640 --> 0:16:48.640 might be doing different things, but you're not going to 0:16:48.640 --> 0:16:50.040 be different by next Wednesday. 0:16:50.080 --> 0:16:53.080 Instagram tells me you can. You're on Instagram, and that 0:16:53.280 --> 0:16:55.440 sets up a lot of people. I'm sounding like I'm 0:16:55.480 --> 0:16:59.160 old with that younger generation, so that borderline gen why 0:16:59.720 --> 0:17:03.920 the millennials. It's really dangerous. I see some of the 0:17:04.000 --> 0:17:08.200 posts what people do around getting success, and I don't 0:17:08.200 --> 0:17:11.360 comment because you just leave it. But it's erroneous. It's 0:17:11.400 --> 0:17:13.720 total bullshit. Like you just mentioned forty years, and I 0:17:13.760 --> 0:17:16.000 think that's one of the things we've lost. Mate, that 0:17:17.000 --> 0:17:22.520 hard work takes time, decades and helps to choose something 0:17:22.560 --> 0:17:25.720 you like. If you look at that grit with Angela Duckworth, 0:17:26.240 --> 0:17:30.359 it's passion plus perseverance. So you love helping people the 0:17:30.440 --> 0:17:33.359 you project this is your third or fourth iteration. You've 0:17:33.400 --> 0:17:37.600 got to be bloody persistent and persevere after a few knockbacks. 0:17:38.400 --> 0:17:40.440 And I think that's I think that's one of the 0:17:40.480 --> 0:17:43.320 reasons why people get nowhere near that potential capacity, because 0:17:43.320 --> 0:17:45.960 they get one or two knocks. I'll stop. I'm just 0:17:46.000 --> 0:17:47.919 going to coast it thirty percent. 0:17:48.760 --> 0:17:51.160 It's very you know, when we're talking about ourselves, it's 0:17:51.240 --> 0:17:54.120 very hard to be objective because you're analyzing yourself, which 0:17:54.160 --> 0:17:58.400 is subjective analysis, right, So I can't be totally objective 0:17:58.400 --> 0:18:01.720 about me because I'm me. So you start with that knowledge, 0:18:02.080 --> 0:18:04.639 you know, it's like the beginning of awareness. Self awareness 0:18:04.680 --> 0:18:08.240 is to recognize your own lack of self awareness. It's 0:18:08.440 --> 0:18:11.359 like this mind fuck, right, but you go, oh, it's 0:18:11.400 --> 0:18:14.439 like when somebody hears their voice on audio for the 0:18:14.480 --> 0:18:17.840 first time, or sees themselves on TV or video camera, 0:18:18.000 --> 0:18:20.520 or you know. I worked on Channel ten for three 0:18:20.600 --> 0:18:22.800 years once a week in the morning's quarter of a 0:18:22.880 --> 0:18:26.600 million people around Australia every week. Well, Craig Harper is 0:18:26.600 --> 0:18:28.600 with us this morning to get us off the weight loss. 0:18:28.640 --> 0:18:30.879 Mary go around once and for all. Good morning, Crazy, 0:18:31.160 --> 0:18:34.320 Good morning Craik All. Well, hopefully, because a lot of 0:18:34.400 --> 0:18:36.680 us spend our life getting on and off that weight loss. 0:18:36.680 --> 0:18:38.720 Mary go round, So perhaps this will be the end 0:18:38.800 --> 0:18:41.000 of the road for a few people, of which you are. 0:18:41.040 --> 0:18:43.199 I don't think that you're really in die need of 0:18:43.840 --> 0:18:46.480 a body renovation, but maybe a little little weeny bit 0:18:46.520 --> 0:18:50.120 of toning up. When I got back to my office 0:18:50.160 --> 0:18:56.000 after day one, I watched myself. I'm like, oh my god, 0:18:56.600 --> 0:19:00.959 I'm a fucking idiot, Like I hate did what I saw. 0:19:01.400 --> 0:19:03.240 But they loved it. They're like, no, that was good. 0:19:03.280 --> 0:19:04.920 You were good. And I'm like, wow, if they think 0:19:04.960 --> 0:19:08.560 that's good, giddy up, because I know that that's not 0:19:08.720 --> 0:19:10.840 me at ten, that's me at three or four. And 0:19:10.840 --> 0:19:12.879 there was an ego in that. There was just I 0:19:12.960 --> 0:19:16.080 knew what I could do and over time, and I 0:19:16.119 --> 0:19:18.720 was never a megastar or anything, but I ended up 0:19:18.760 --> 0:19:22.840 doing a pretty good job. But being committed to being 0:19:22.880 --> 0:19:27.840 okay with not being the best and not necessarily being 0:19:27.840 --> 0:19:31.680 the best anyway, and being okay with embarrassment or failure 0:19:31.880 --> 0:19:36.320 while genuinely striving to do the absolute best that I could, 0:19:36.760 --> 0:19:40.840 knowing that sometimes I will fuck it up and that's okay. 0:19:40.880 --> 0:19:46.119 And it's that willingness I think to be okay with 0:19:46.280 --> 0:19:49.879 fucking up as long as you're trying, because fucking up 0:19:49.960 --> 0:19:53.000 is learning, fucking up his self awareness, it's understanding, it's 0:19:53.040 --> 0:19:57.240 in sight, but also being able to which is rare 0:19:57.280 --> 0:20:03.000 in twenty twenty six, be okay with wrong, just wrong right. 0:20:03.040 --> 0:20:07.240 And it's like, oh, I thought this, I even argued this, 0:20:08.040 --> 0:20:10.840 I even got all emotional. I even pointed things. I 0:20:10.880 --> 0:20:14.600 even guess what I was one hundred percent wrong. Now 0:20:15.600 --> 0:20:17.720 you know that that's one of the other things, too, 0:20:17.840 --> 0:20:21.879 is our need to be right is a is part 0:20:21.920 --> 0:20:24.359 of that gap. You know, when you have to be 0:20:24.440 --> 0:20:27.280 right all the time, that's an inhibitor on your potential 0:20:27.600 --> 0:20:31.160 because if people aren't echoing your thoughts and your ideas. 0:20:31.680 --> 0:20:34.560 I mentioned this actually on a podcast this morning, but 0:20:35.320 --> 0:20:37.840 new audience, I'll say it again. But I thought so 0:20:38.040 --> 0:20:40.600 two things over the last two days. It was essentially 0:20:40.640 --> 0:20:43.560 the same comment. Somebody got on their high horse on 0:20:43.760 --> 0:20:47.600 Facebook and they gave this rant about whoever it is 0:20:47.680 --> 0:20:51.320 or whatever it was. But this isn't this person. And 0:20:51.400 --> 0:20:54.240 at the end they said, if you disagree with me, 0:20:54.720 --> 0:20:58.040