1
00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:03,160
Speaker 1: Him, I boris and this is straight talk. You know

2
00:00:03,680 --> 00:00:04,240
Speaker 1: there's time.

3
00:00:04,680 --> 00:00:06,400
Speaker 2: My god, Mark, you're going to die.

4
00:00:07,120 --> 00:00:09,560
Speaker 1: Julia Morris, welcome to straight Talk.

5
00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:12,200
Speaker 2: Thank you so much, market absolute pleasure to be here.

6
00:00:13,080 --> 00:00:15,600
Speaker 1: Do you have lived a life undiagnosed, but now you

7
00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:18,319
Speaker 1: are diagnosed, You've gone through a divorce, You've done a

8
00:00:18,360 --> 00:00:20,840
Speaker 1: million different things in your life. Do you think yourself, Julia,

9
00:00:20,920 --> 00:00:22,280
Speaker 1: I'm going to give yourself a patter on the back.

10
00:00:22,360 --> 00:00:27,680
Speaker 3: Ah at all times that since getting divorced, the greatest

11
00:00:27,760 --> 00:00:31,200
Speaker 3: lesson I taught myself, I think is instead of trying

12
00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:33,800
Speaker 3: to prove to everyone, I'm decent.

13
00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:36,080
Speaker 2: I'm a friend, I'm loyal, I'm all the good stuff.

14
00:00:36,200 --> 00:00:39,519
Speaker 2: Now I feel like I say, do you behave well

15
00:00:39,640 --> 00:00:42,120
Speaker 2: enough to have access to me? And if you don't,

16
00:00:42,920 --> 00:00:45,839
Speaker 2: fucking beat it, see you later. I'm sorry, computer denied.

17
00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:47,879
Speaker 2: I think the bad stuff so easy to go. All

18
00:00:47,920 --> 00:00:49,800
Speaker 2: the bloody cars on this and now the house and

19
00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:54,000
Speaker 2: that's stupid around, how the roof's rotten and whatever that is.

20
00:00:54,200 --> 00:00:57,720
Speaker 2: But it's remembering to notice the glimmers is what everybody's

21
00:00:57,720 --> 00:00:58,360
Speaker 2: calling them.

22
00:00:58,480 --> 00:01:02,520
Speaker 1: Juliet, I got two words for you. Inspired. You're inspiring.

23
00:01:02,560 --> 00:01:04,520
Speaker 1: You're actually inspiring, ah, thank you.

24
00:01:04,520 --> 00:01:05,919
Speaker 2: I thought you were going to say you're fired.

25
00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:08,360
Speaker 1: Excited.

26
00:01:08,520 --> 00:01:10,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, thrilled to be here.

27
00:01:10,480 --> 00:01:12,920
Speaker 1: Julia Morris, welcome to straight Talk.

28
00:01:13,120 --> 00:01:15,319
Speaker 2: Thank you so much. Market an absolute pleasure to be

29
00:01:15,400 --> 00:01:17,759
Speaker 2: here and a big departure that I'm able to call

30
00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:20,040
Speaker 2: you Mark from each other.

31
00:01:22,160 --> 00:01:25,760
Speaker 1: And you look great, thank you look like you look younger.

32
00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:28,720
Speaker 2: Oh mate, I'm some phoenix out of the flame ship.

33
00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:34,679
Speaker 2: Nick's absolutely right. I feel I literally feel like I've

34
00:01:34,680 --> 00:01:36,600
Speaker 2: pressed the reset button and I'm about to start the

35
00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:38,040
Speaker 2: next big stage of my life.

36
00:01:38,160 --> 00:01:42,279
Speaker 1: So you're just back from Africa. Your show's now airing.

37
00:01:42,640 --> 00:01:45,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, so we go live to air. So we're six

38
00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:48,720
Speaker 2: weeks away from most of January, a bit of February

39
00:01:49,040 --> 00:01:52,160
Speaker 2: in up in the Kruger National Park. So it's all

40
00:01:52,160 --> 00:01:53,560
Speaker 2: done and dusted for the year.

41
00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:56,280
Speaker 1: And how was it like? So, I mean you've got

42
00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:57,360
Speaker 1: a new co host.

43
00:01:57,480 --> 00:02:01,840
Speaker 2: Yes, Robert Irwin. Oh my god, Mark spectacular human?

44
00:02:02,560 --> 00:02:03,520
Speaker 1: How is he?

45
00:02:03,640 --> 00:02:06,040
Speaker 2: I don't understand how he's such an accomplished human? He's

46
00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:07,000
Speaker 2: twin t he one.

47
00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:08,360
Speaker 1: What the hell does that?

48
00:02:08,400 --> 00:02:10,480
Speaker 2: I know that might sound patronizing to younger people, and

49
00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:12,320
Speaker 2: I don't mean it to sound like that, but it's

50
00:02:12,360 --> 00:02:16,520
Speaker 2: not often I will cross paths with somebody who is

51
00:02:16,560 --> 00:02:20,680
Speaker 2: so young, who feels about a lifetime more mature than

52
00:02:20,720 --> 00:02:21,000
Speaker 2: I am.

53
00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:25,040
Speaker 1: Like, how does the dynamic work? Though? Because like, I

54
00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:27,040
Speaker 1: can't imagine me working with a twenty one year old

55
00:02:27,160 --> 00:02:31,040
Speaker 1: girl if it's the opposite sex. I like, I don't know,

56
00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:32,960
Speaker 1: I wand you are much older than you, But like,

57
00:02:33,680 --> 00:02:36,000
Speaker 1: how does that work? Like how do the who works

58
00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:36,960
Speaker 1: out of those dynamics?

59
00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:40,480
Speaker 2: Like the producer or no will I auditioned with a

60
00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:43,760
Speaker 2: number of people to see if they were going to

61
00:02:43,800 --> 00:02:47,960
Speaker 2: be possible for the Jungle, And then when Robert came in, Honestly,

62
00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:51,240
Speaker 2: my one of my early thoughts, apart from him being amazing,

63
00:02:51,440 --> 00:02:53,200
Speaker 2: one of my early thoughts is is this going to

64
00:02:53,240 --> 00:02:54,520
Speaker 2: age me out of the format?

65
00:02:54,680 --> 00:02:55,120
Speaker 1: Yeah?

66
00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:58,240
Speaker 2: I've never seen on this planet a woman in her

67
00:02:58,240 --> 00:03:00,920
Speaker 2: fifty side by side of the twenty one year making

68
00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:06,359
Speaker 2: like television work. So I mean, you know I will

69
00:03:06,360 --> 00:03:09,639
Speaker 2: be able to make television work with this stick. So

70
00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:13,720
Speaker 2: I already know that Robert has this incredible wealth of experience.

71
00:03:14,480 --> 00:03:16,040
Speaker 2: I know he's got a great sense of humor because

72
00:03:16,040 --> 00:03:17,760
Speaker 2: I've met him a couple of times, and he came

73
00:03:17,800 --> 00:03:19,680
Speaker 2: in for the audition and all of a sudden, nobody

74
00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:24,600
Speaker 2: else existed, and the age I don't even think we

75
00:03:24,680 --> 00:03:27,799
Speaker 2: ever speak about age. Age just doesn't come into it.

76
00:03:27,919 --> 00:03:31,400
Speaker 2: I think he's a He's an incredibly savvy, well read

77
00:03:31,639 --> 00:03:34,600
Speaker 2: young man, and he would know I feel like he

78
00:03:34,639 --> 00:03:37,920
Speaker 2: would know how to wrestle a croc. But he would

79
00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:40,240
Speaker 2: also be able to tell you what the michell and

80
00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:43,520
Speaker 2: what each micheline star is for. He's kind of that guy,

81
00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:45,320
Speaker 2: do you know what I mean? Like he's always in

82
00:03:45,400 --> 00:03:48,080
Speaker 2: mud and running around and doing that sort of stuff,

83
00:03:48,120 --> 00:03:51,640
Speaker 2: but he also would understand some of I'm not sure

84
00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:53,240
Speaker 2: the finer things in life is the right way to

85
00:03:53,720 --> 00:03:58,600
Speaker 2: say it, but yeah, he's super fascinating human being.

86
00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:03,559
Speaker 1: I'm actually quite intrigued about how it's going to how

87
00:04:03,640 --> 00:04:07,200
Speaker 1: the interaction is going to work, because I remember when

88
00:04:07,240 --> 00:04:12,680
Speaker 1: you were on The Celebrity Apprentice that when we had

89
00:04:12,760 --> 00:04:15,040
Speaker 1: all you know you guys lined up boys and girls,

90
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:18,080
Speaker 1: and I said to the production people after the first episode,

91
00:04:18,120 --> 00:04:20,920
Speaker 1: she's going to win it. And Nina, Oh, you can't

92
00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:22,480
Speaker 1: say that now, you can't you know how to do that,

93
00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:24,120
Speaker 1: And I said, I'm just telling you, she's going to

94
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:27,440
Speaker 1: win it. That's you. Julie Morris and and you just

95
00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:31,520
Speaker 1: come back off a comedy tour whatever you call it.

96
00:04:32,080 --> 00:04:34,560
Speaker 2: I'm living in Los Angeles for a couple of years.

97
00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:38,520
Speaker 1: And you were a little a little underdone in terms

98
00:04:38,560 --> 00:04:40,960
Speaker 1: of what I mean by those I felt like at

99
00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:43,960
Speaker 1: the beginning you lacked a bit of confidence. But there's

100
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:46,080
Speaker 1: a show. You certainly got your conference.

101
00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:48,280
Speaker 2: Can I know why I came in early as well,

102
00:04:48,279 --> 00:04:51,240
Speaker 2: because I was at that stage traveling back and forth

103
00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:54,400
Speaker 2: to Los Angeles every five weeks, come home, do some gigs,

104
00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:56,960
Speaker 2: go back again. And this was the first wage that

105
00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:59,839
Speaker 2: had floated the surface in a long long time that

106
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:03,880
Speaker 2: that felt like with every week that I last, I'll

107
00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:06,919
Speaker 2: be able to pay another month in La. So my motivation,

108
00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:10,920
Speaker 2: certainly when I arrived was let's get two, three, four

109
00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:11,880
Speaker 2: weeks of wages.

110
00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:16,080
Speaker 1: And that's because we paid you just so.

111
00:05:15,279 --> 00:05:17,400
Speaker 2: Yes, so to stay in the show longer, I was

112
00:05:17,440 --> 00:05:18,440
Speaker 2: the incentive to earn.

113
00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:22,200
Speaker 1: The longer you get paid per day, yeah a day rate, yes.

114
00:05:22,279 --> 00:05:26,000
Speaker 2: So then, and certainly for that first week, I think

115
00:05:26,040 --> 00:05:28,120
Speaker 2: in any reality show there feels like there's a lot

116
00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:30,000
Speaker 2: of roostering that goes on in that first week. I

117
00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:32,920
Speaker 2: don't know if it's meant to show other people you're smart,

118
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:36,000
Speaker 2: or whether it's to you know, make the competition feel

119
00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:38,360
Speaker 2: a bit nervous. So I was like, yeah, I think

120
00:05:38,360 --> 00:05:40,360
Speaker 2: I'll let all the roosters just do their rooster thing.

121
00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:42,800
Speaker 2: And I'd worked out from early in the piece that

122
00:05:42,920 --> 00:05:48,560
Speaker 2: if I was a great second in charge, that whoever

123
00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:52,400
Speaker 2: was leading the charge of each of those tasks would

124
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:54,200
Speaker 2: not blame me for anything that went wrong.

125
00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:58,919
Speaker 1: Support that it's run under the bus. Yes, that's creeping.

126
00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:03,760
Speaker 1: Can I make it a confession to you? I also said,

127
00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:06,240
Speaker 1: And they also said to me too, We've got to

128
00:06:06,279 --> 00:06:09,000
Speaker 1: keep room because when the show gets a bit dead

129
00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:12,440
Speaker 1: like and it does like, she's always good for a gag,

130
00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:16,559
Speaker 1: so they can if they knew that, we can vox

131
00:06:16,640 --> 00:06:18,720
Speaker 1: you and you know, we get a little comment from

132
00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:20,960
Speaker 1: you on something when we have a flat spot. And

133
00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:23,760
Speaker 1: when we come to the edit, if we've got if

134
00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:26,480
Speaker 1: it's editing sort of bit flat for that particular episode,

135
00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:29,600
Speaker 1: we can bring we we've already got some material from Julia.

136
00:06:31,279 --> 00:06:33,400
Speaker 1: We'll just get the old mole and throw throw that.

137
00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:36,560
Speaker 1: Throw that in and it just lifts the it lifts

138
00:06:36,560 --> 00:06:40,240
Speaker 1: the tempo up a bit. And and and what I

139
00:06:40,360 --> 00:06:43,400
Speaker 1: didn't know is where the hell you get your energy

140
00:06:43,400 --> 00:06:46,760
Speaker 1: from to be that way like you were and you

141
00:06:46,839 --> 00:06:49,520
Speaker 1: still are immediately you know, you're fifty seven years of

142
00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:52,760
Speaker 1: age over you still immediately bubbly like it's a bubbly

143
00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:54,000
Speaker 1: Julia all the time.

144
00:06:54,560 --> 00:06:56,440
Speaker 2: Alive, Wake up, alive.

145
00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:59,039
Speaker 1: That's a good stand drives a lit up right now. Well,

146
00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:01,760
Speaker 1: I've had some decksund a means so the Dexies see

147
00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:03,480
Speaker 1: you on the Dexies only recently.

148
00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:05,240
Speaker 2: I'm four weeks in maybe.

149
00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:07,240
Speaker 1: So tell me about that. Okay, we were talking about

150
00:07:07,240 --> 00:07:07,719
Speaker 1: our side.

151
00:07:07,839 --> 00:07:10,000
Speaker 2: Both of my girls. We've been going through our various

152
00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:12,480
Speaker 2: son two daughters. I've got two daughters sixteen and eighteen

153
00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:16,000
Speaker 2: years old, and we've been going through our neurodiverse journey

154
00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:19,640
Speaker 2: over the last I mean three years maybe where we're like,

155
00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:23,400
Speaker 2: things aren't working in our brains like we'd like them to.

156
00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:29,240
Speaker 2: I think at twenty fifty seven, I just thought, this

157
00:07:29,320 --> 00:07:31,320
Speaker 2: is how my brain works, and that's how it is.

158
00:07:31,400 --> 00:07:34,480
Speaker 2: So that's that sometimes I'm not good at stuff, sometimes

159
00:07:34,480 --> 00:07:36,040
Speaker 2: I'm good at stuff, and you learn what works for

160
00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:37,840
Speaker 2: you and you kind of did more of that, I guess.

161
00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:41,840
Speaker 2: So last year with both of my girls diagnosed, I

162
00:07:41,880 --> 00:07:42,520
Speaker 2: was like, did.

163
00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:46,000
Speaker 1: You sorry, did you think there was something not wrong

164
00:07:46,040 --> 00:07:49,680
Speaker 1: with something different? Diverse? Therefore you decided to get your

165
00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:50,920
Speaker 1: daughters diagnosed.

166
00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:53,960
Speaker 2: First, I think the girls wanted answers. Both of them

167
00:07:53,960 --> 00:07:56,640
Speaker 2: had been saying, I reckon since year seven. They're now

168
00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:59,600
Speaker 2: in year big part year eleven and just finished school.

169
00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:01,960
Speaker 2: They've both been saying for a long time, I reckon,

170
00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:04,800
Speaker 2: We've got adhd mum. And I was like, it's a

171
00:08:04,840 --> 00:08:07,040
Speaker 2: few years ago. I'm like, oh, yeah, everyone's gone all right, Yeah,

172
00:08:07,040 --> 00:08:09,680
Speaker 2: I know, we've all got it's very interesting and that

173
00:08:09,760 --> 00:08:13,120
Speaker 2: obviously is not the right attitude. And the more we

174
00:08:13,240 --> 00:08:15,400
Speaker 2: kind of worked on it, then the girls were like,

175
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:18,320
Speaker 2: you know, you have looked at yourself, haven't you. And

176
00:08:18,360 --> 00:08:21,160
Speaker 2: I'll be like, come on, I'm just d yeah, I'm

177
00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:23,160
Speaker 2: a weird anomaly. I'm just like, you know, I'm a

178
00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:27,440
Speaker 2: cookie or whatever. And then I thought, well, maybe I

179
00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:31,400
Speaker 2: think with menopause as well. With menopause, what happens is

180
00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:33,480
Speaker 2: the brain anything that you were able to mask in

181
00:08:33,520 --> 00:08:36,120
Speaker 2: the past and look capable and be together and finish

182
00:08:36,160 --> 00:08:38,440
Speaker 2: the sentence and trial a la, all of a sudden,

183
00:08:38,480 --> 00:08:40,600
Speaker 2: all bets are off and the brain's like I'm going

184
00:08:40,640 --> 00:08:44,880
Speaker 2: to leave you to it. So I was feeling like

185
00:08:44,920 --> 00:08:47,800
Speaker 2: I was spiraling a little bit with like, you know,

186
00:08:47,880 --> 00:08:51,560
Speaker 2: I'm urgent, I'm tired, I'm all of these different emotions

187
00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:54,280
Speaker 2: within one day. And as you say, sparky in the mornings,

188
00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:58,040
Speaker 2: and even though I joke about, oh god, ya get

189
00:08:58,040 --> 00:09:00,599
Speaker 2: a heartbeat, but the decks and it means which is

190
00:09:00,600 --> 00:09:03,720
Speaker 2: a vivance And it's a slow roll out of eight hours.

191
00:09:03,840 --> 00:09:07,480
Speaker 2: What that does is it lets me focus on what

192
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:10,160
Speaker 2: I'm doing instead of what would normally be happening for

193
00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:12,880
Speaker 2: me and my brain. I'd be like, oh, there's a

194
00:09:12,920 --> 00:09:14,520
Speaker 2: silver thing over there that's going to make under my

195
00:09:14,559 --> 00:09:16,120
Speaker 2: chin look better. This light's going to be good. I

196
00:09:16,160 --> 00:09:18,400
Speaker 2: wonder if my glasses are reflecting. I should have probably

197
00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:20,240
Speaker 2: put some more lipstick on. You know, that rain this

198
00:09:20,280 --> 00:09:22,880
Speaker 2: morning ruin my hair. But one of those cameras on,

199
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:25,520
Speaker 2: that's a nice camera. What you thinking about, Cannon at

200
00:09:25,559 --> 00:09:30,160
Speaker 2: all times while talking to you? So now all I'm

201
00:09:30,160 --> 00:09:32,880
Speaker 2: doing is talking to you. So I feel like it's

202
00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:35,880
Speaker 2: cut away fifteen radio stations to one.

203
00:09:36,120 --> 00:09:38,560
Speaker 1: Was it a relief to find it out? Or is it?

204
00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:39,920
Speaker 1: Or is it a do you know?

205
00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:42,240
Speaker 2: Lots of people have been sort of a lot of

206
00:09:42,280 --> 00:09:45,400
Speaker 2: talk about ADHD online, and they were saying I was

207
00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:48,520
Speaker 2: just an excuse. It's an excuse to behave badly or

208
00:09:48,559 --> 00:09:50,640
Speaker 2: not to call back friends or to do whatever. But

209
00:09:50,760 --> 00:09:55,959
Speaker 2: for me, it has been an explanation. I feel like

210
00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:58,920
Speaker 2: it's given me an explanation. Ah, Okay, So I'm not

211
00:09:58,960 --> 00:10:00,960
Speaker 2: a bad person because I couldn't return that call. I'm

212
00:10:00,960 --> 00:10:03,600
Speaker 2: not you know, I'm not a bad person because I

213
00:10:03,640 --> 00:10:06,520
Speaker 2: can't keep up socially when my batteries are out and

214
00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:09,520
Speaker 2: so on, and so yeah, I think it's allowed me

215
00:10:09,559 --> 00:10:12,679
Speaker 2: to kind of slow things down. I don't want to

216
00:10:12,720 --> 00:10:15,720
Speaker 2: be all urgent for this next part of my life.

217
00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:18,280
Speaker 2: I want to feel like I am, you know, a

218
00:10:18,320 --> 00:10:21,320
Speaker 2: bit more chill, to hang around and feeling chill inside.

219
00:10:21,679 --> 00:10:24,560
Speaker 1: It just explained it to me, though, a little bit more,

220
00:10:25,760 --> 00:10:27,880
Speaker 1: because I found something you just said quite interesting. And

221
00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:32,320
Speaker 1: I've often wondered this about people who have ADHD. Do

222
00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:34,960
Speaker 1: you sort of go a million miles now and then

223
00:10:35,559 --> 00:10:37,560
Speaker 1: as you said, the batteries sort of run out and

224
00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:38,080
Speaker 1: you just got.

225
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,000
Speaker 2: Spat out the other end?

226
00:10:40,120 --> 00:10:42,640
Speaker 1: Serious? I think, so, yeah, you're not all that. You're

227
00:10:42,679 --> 00:10:44,360
Speaker 1: not like that to the time you get into bed

228
00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:45,880
Speaker 1: and you're still like that when you're sleeping.

229
00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:50,160
Speaker 2: No, no, so you do sort of run out of yeah,

230
00:10:50,200 --> 00:10:51,920
Speaker 2: and it's all said. I don't make many plans that

231
00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:56,320
Speaker 2: co Grandma. I don't make many plans at night because

232
00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:57,560
Speaker 2: I find by about six.

233
00:10:57,440 --> 00:10:58,720
Speaker 1: O'clock I will be cooked.

234
00:10:58,760 --> 00:11:01,319
Speaker 2: I'd rather start cutting then go out and be social.

235
00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:04,600
Speaker 2: I have no interest that's out with all the drinkers.

236
00:11:04,960 --> 00:11:07,480
Speaker 2: No judge, no judgment, no judgment. But you know, and

237
00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:09,680
Speaker 2: I love a glass of wine, but I can't. I

238
00:11:09,679 --> 00:11:12,319
Speaker 2: can't be out after dark just having people talking.

239
00:11:12,320 --> 00:11:14,080
Speaker 1: Now there has always been the case.

240
00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:17,280
Speaker 2: Now, I think I've always been a bit of a homebody. Actually,

241
00:11:17,600 --> 00:11:19,720
Speaker 2: I would much rather be at home and have a

242
00:11:19,760 --> 00:11:22,800
Speaker 2: couple of pals over than partying anywhere.

243
00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:26,480
Speaker 1: So does that mean you're like it sounds crazy for me,

244
00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:29,840
Speaker 1: asked the question. But a little bit introverted in a social.

245
00:11:29,559 --> 00:11:31,319
Speaker 2: Sense, introverted, extrovert.

246
00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:35,199
Speaker 1: I think it's weird. It's weird, like you, right, that's.

247
00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:37,160
Speaker 2: The ADHD wanting to be out and like even when

248
00:11:37,160 --> 00:11:38,959
Speaker 2: I'm at home, should have made a plan. I've got

249
00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:40,800
Speaker 2: this time. I'd love to catch up with a friend.

250
00:11:41,400 --> 00:11:43,640
Speaker 2: Don't see anybody most of the time, and then when

251
00:11:43,679 --> 00:11:46,280
Speaker 2: it comes to the moment, I.

252
00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:46,920
Speaker 1: Don't want to do it?

253
00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:49,120
Speaker 2: Why do I have to go? Why have I done this?

254
00:11:49,440 --> 00:11:52,199
Speaker 1: Once? You once you're there, you flip, you flip back

255
00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:52,839
Speaker 1: into I.

256
00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:55,160
Speaker 2: Do you enjoy it? But I'm also counting when when

257
00:11:55,240 --> 00:11:58,040
Speaker 2: can I get out of here? That's mad down time

258
00:11:58,120 --> 00:11:58,760
Speaker 2: the whole time.

259
00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:01,040
Speaker 1: Fuck. Maybe maybe I got to do because like.

260
00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:04,719
Speaker 2: Get in the algorithm. It's fascinating, there is one. So

261
00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:08,840
Speaker 2: you know that hyperactivity is not busy, busy drag queen.

262
00:12:09,040 --> 00:12:11,920
Speaker 2: The hyperactivity is all in your mind. And so I

263
00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:14,959
Speaker 2: my mind feels like a bit of a rolodex. Did

264
00:12:14,960 --> 00:12:18,599
Speaker 2: a little, did a little, did a little, a little. Yeah,

265
00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:21,720
Speaker 2: So that's the slowdown I needed. But the other part

266
00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:26,240
Speaker 2: of ADHD is before you realize that. You know, I'm

267
00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:27,880
Speaker 2: not going to describe it very well because I'm still

268
00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:30,800
Speaker 2: taking a little deep dive into it. But what happens

269
00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:33,240
Speaker 2: when you've there's a lot of addiction issues with it

270
00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:37,200
Speaker 2: because you have some self regulating stuff. So you have

271
00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:38,840
Speaker 2: to be careful with booze. You have to be careful

272
00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:41,680
Speaker 2: if you're like a jazz cigarette. Oh might be ab

273
00:12:41,679 --> 00:12:45,199
Speaker 2: addicted to that. But honestly, Mark no judgement or no,

274
00:12:45,240 --> 00:12:47,920
Speaker 2: I think the roots have closed. That's a shame. But like,

275
00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:50,960
Speaker 2: how do you get to the point where you are

276
00:12:51,880 --> 00:12:55,400
Speaker 2: gonna I don't like kiss somebody I don't understand, So

277
00:12:55,559 --> 00:12:57,280
Speaker 2: I just I think that might be over for me

278
00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:57,840
Speaker 2: that section.

279
00:12:58,160 --> 00:12:59,959
Speaker 1: But what about what about addiction to your work?

280
00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:01,559
Speaker 2: Definitely?

281
00:13:02,760 --> 00:13:05,480
Speaker 1: Definitely, So if you look back when you're you know,

282
00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:08,079
Speaker 1: when you were ten fifteen years ago, do you think

283
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:10,720
Speaker 1: you were addicted to your work as well?

284
00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:15,240
Speaker 2: I think that I thought I didn't have Okay, let

285
00:13:15,280 --> 00:13:16,280
Speaker 2: me put it this way, even though I know was

286
00:13:16,320 --> 00:13:18,280
Speaker 2: going to sound wrong. I didn't have much brains, but

287
00:13:18,320 --> 00:13:19,839
Speaker 2: I knew I could hard work hard.

288
00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:22,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, So now I.

289
00:13:22,320 --> 00:13:25,920
Speaker 2: Realized, I think I might have been confused about my

290
00:13:26,040 --> 00:13:29,880
Speaker 2: brain because of the way the adhd rolls. And now

291
00:13:29,920 --> 00:13:32,400
Speaker 2: that I've started the harness a little bit and understand

292
00:13:32,440 --> 00:13:35,480
Speaker 2: it. And also the interesting thing about having the diagnosis is

293
00:13:35,520 --> 00:13:37,400
Speaker 2: I can start to plan a day or a week,

294
00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:40,400
Speaker 2: or a month or a trip knowing that these are

295
00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:44,080
Speaker 2: some of my shortfalls or some of my little idiosyncrasies.

296
00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:46,400
Speaker 2: So now I know to build in the rest time,

297
00:13:47,040 --> 00:13:48,959
Speaker 2: I'm going to need a little processing. So if I'm

298
00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:51,360
Speaker 2: on a big trip, we're heading on to Tokyo with

299
00:13:51,400 --> 00:13:54,440
Speaker 2: my youngest. So I built in like a little half morning,

300
00:13:54,480 --> 00:13:57,040
Speaker 2: half afternoon where we really just stop and scroll or

301
00:13:57,080 --> 00:14:00,239
Speaker 2: do whatever it is to let the brain reset itself.

302
00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:05,160
Speaker 2: So definitely get that diagnosed. My diagnosis has helped, Yeah,

303
00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:08,280
Speaker 2: me run days a little bit better. Otherwise I'm up

304
00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:11,560
Speaker 2: early and I'm going to smash myself until I'm still

305
00:14:11,920 --> 00:14:13,680
Speaker 2: doing chores by the time I get into bed.

306
00:14:14,360 --> 00:14:17,320
Speaker 1: So just given that what you're saying, because I'm sort

307
00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:21,880
Speaker 1: of thinking along with you, does that mean that because

308
00:14:21,880 --> 00:14:27,680
Speaker 1: you're so hyper focused on many, many things, that your

309
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:31,840
Speaker 1: peripheral vision relative to other things going on in your

310
00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:37,120
Speaker 1: life might be to some extent reduced, and as a

311
00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:39,520
Speaker 1: result of that, you might be open to being manipulated.

312
00:14:39,840 --> 00:14:46,480
Speaker 2: Definitely, Oh my god, that fernitely easy to manipulate because

313
00:14:46,520 --> 00:14:49,560
Speaker 2: I see the good in people. Yeah, I think I

314
00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:53,480
Speaker 2: think I'm easy to manipulate. Because, uh, I should put

315
00:14:53,480 --> 00:14:55,200
Speaker 2: this in the past tense. I feel like the last

316
00:14:55,240 --> 00:14:58,440
Speaker 2: three or four years I've been doing some pretty extensive

317
00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:02,120
Speaker 2: work on myself with thinking about trying to recognize if

318
00:15:02,160 --> 00:15:04,840
Speaker 2: someone's being rude to my face. Because sometimes if someone's

319
00:15:04,920 --> 00:15:08,040
Speaker 2: rude to my face, what I will do is think,

320
00:15:08,080 --> 00:15:10,360
Speaker 2: oh no, they're going to be so embarrassed when they

321
00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:13,320
Speaker 2: realize how Maine they've been. They're going to be embarrassed

322
00:15:13,320 --> 00:15:14,640
Speaker 2: about that. So I'm going to let them off the

323
00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:18,480
Speaker 2: hook so they don't feel embarrassed about that later while

324
00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:20,960
Speaker 2: they're being rude to my face instead of being like, hey,

325
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:24,200
Speaker 2: you know what, go get fucked. Yeah, I'm all like,

326
00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:25,440
Speaker 2: oh no, no, it's all good man.

327
00:15:25,520 --> 00:15:25,720
Speaker 3: You know.

328
00:15:26,480 --> 00:15:30,440
Speaker 2: So that people please you before, that's people pleasing all along.

329
00:15:30,880 --> 00:15:32,680
Speaker 2: That's a big part of ADHD as well.

330
00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:33,320
Speaker 1: People please.

331
00:15:33,440 --> 00:15:37,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, the people pleasing and the compliance. I'd much rather

332
00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:38,880
Speaker 2: do that than be in trouble. I don't want to

333
00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:39,720
Speaker 2: be in trouble.

334
00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:43,240
Speaker 1: Because the reason I said that because I remember had

335
00:15:43,240 --> 00:15:46,320
Speaker 1: you said to you, I'm going to apologize in advance

336
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:48,400
Speaker 1: for doing it, but I just said to you. We

337
00:15:48,600 --> 00:15:51,200
Speaker 1: always knew that we could keep Julia in the show,

338
00:15:51,720 --> 00:15:53,280
Speaker 1: even though you were the best in the show. Like

339
00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:55,720
Speaker 1: you in my view, you should have won. You did win,

340
00:15:56,160 --> 00:15:58,800
Speaker 1: but we also kept in it for convenience sake because

341
00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:01,080
Speaker 1: I knew from what because I used to see all

342
00:16:01,120 --> 00:16:04,480
Speaker 1: the the day before, so they showed me the stuff

343
00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:06,480
Speaker 1: in the know before we get in there again the

344
00:16:06,560 --> 00:16:08,480
Speaker 1: early and we look through the previous day and I'd

345
00:16:08,520 --> 00:16:12,840
Speaker 1: see Julia in there, just so good for us, like

346
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:15,800
Speaker 1: giving us, helping us for those blind spots with energy

347
00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:19,240
Speaker 1: because everyone gets pretty stuffed, you know, like and you

348
00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:22,800
Speaker 1: always give us a good you know, thirty seconds. And

349
00:16:22,880 --> 00:16:26,440
Speaker 1: to some extent, I thought, well, let's use her, yeah

350
00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:30,160
Speaker 1: to fill the show gaps up, I was saying that,

351
00:16:30,440 --> 00:16:30,720
Speaker 1: And it.

352
00:16:30,640 --> 00:16:32,760
Speaker 2: Gives it that nice little comedy moment at the end,

353
00:16:32,800 --> 00:16:36,600
Speaker 2: even if it's been something stressful, or because the more

354
00:16:36,640 --> 00:16:38,720
Speaker 2: stressed you get through a shoot like that, the more

355
00:16:38,760 --> 00:16:40,440
Speaker 2: tired you get through a shit like that.

356
00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:42,920
Speaker 1: Which one we want, We want everyone to get tired,

357
00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:44,720
Speaker 1: because we wanted to break down and give us tears

358
00:16:44,760 --> 00:16:45,400
Speaker 1: and all sort of stuff.

359
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:48,920
Speaker 2: And also like oh yeah, we'll.

360
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:52,920
Speaker 1: Make mistakes and yes, And to some extent I was

361
00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:56,680
Speaker 1: a bit guilty of this because I didn't realize the HD,

362
00:16:56,840 --> 00:17:01,600
Speaker 1: but back then I didn't know it was. But I

363
00:17:01,640 --> 00:17:04,040
Speaker 1: just thought, she's going to give us the feelings all

364
00:17:04,080 --> 00:17:05,639
Speaker 1: the time, so let's just keep it on, let's keep

365
00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:08,199
Speaker 1: me wrong. But what I'm probably going to lead to

366
00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:11,840
Speaker 1: then is does that mean that in your life other

367
00:17:11,880 --> 00:17:15,240
Speaker 1: people have manipulated you or taken advantage of I think

368
00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:16,000
Speaker 1: your commission.

369
00:17:16,600 --> 00:17:19,600
Speaker 2: Oh definitely, particularly not knowing you have a condition. So

370
00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:23,960
Speaker 2: I think getting older is also one of those transitional

371
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:26,560
Speaker 2: periods through to like I'm not going to do that anymore.

372
00:17:26,760 --> 00:17:29,080
Speaker 2: I don't need to go out to that tonight. Oh gosh,

373
00:17:29,119 --> 00:17:30,800
Speaker 2: I'm going to hurt their feelings if I don't do

374
00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:32,399
Speaker 2: such and such. Guess what, I'm just not going to

375
00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:33,440
Speaker 2: do it. So I'll be honest with that.

376
00:17:33,560 --> 00:17:36,280
Speaker 1: Okay, that's a good one, because like preservation of yourself

377
00:17:36,320 --> 00:17:41,560
Speaker 1: preservation particularly a time. Do you find if you reflect

378
00:17:41,600 --> 00:17:45,680
Speaker 1: on your life, would you conclude that over your life

379
00:17:45,720 --> 00:17:47,679
Speaker 1: there are so many things that you said yes to

380
00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:50,320
Speaker 1: which you said no, fuck off. I'm just going to

381
00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:51,760
Speaker 1: keep that time of themselves. I don't need to go

382
00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:54,159
Speaker 1: to that. Yeah, so is that a thing? Has that

383
00:17:54,280 --> 00:17:54,800
Speaker 1: been a thing?

384
00:17:54,840 --> 00:17:56,760
Speaker 2: I think? So I'm not a great one for going

385
00:17:56,760 --> 00:17:59,359
Speaker 2: to things anyway. I think I am right.

386
00:17:59,440 --> 00:18:01,399
Speaker 1: Let's say it's because you've got to go. You know,

387
00:18:01,440 --> 00:18:03,320
Speaker 1: it's a red carpet. Whatever got to go.

388
00:18:03,359 --> 00:18:05,480
Speaker 2: And like, even so, if the logis last year, I'd

389
00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:08,399
Speaker 2: not long got my diagnosis for ADHD, but I couldn't

390
00:18:08,440 --> 00:18:10,440
Speaker 2: get in to see a psychiatrist for nearly four and

391
00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:11,480
Speaker 2: a half months.

392
00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:12,480
Speaker 1: So I can't get your medication.

393
00:18:12,640 --> 00:18:14,520
Speaker 2: I knew that I was going to have a medication option.

394
00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:16,119
Speaker 2: I only wanted to check it to see if it

395
00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:18,439
Speaker 2: made me less volatile, to see if it made me

396
00:18:18,560 --> 00:18:20,840
Speaker 2: less reactionary, to see if it just made my life

397
00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:24,080
Speaker 2: feel slightly less like I'm going to chuck at all times.

398
00:18:24,119 --> 00:18:27,800
Speaker 2: You know, that anxiety and that intense and I rang

399
00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:30,359
Speaker 2: the GP and I'm like, I'm going to kill someone

400
00:18:30,359 --> 00:18:32,119
Speaker 2: in that carpet on Sunday. I'm going to lose my

401
00:18:32,160 --> 00:18:34,639
Speaker 2: career on Sunday. Is there anything anything we can do?

402
00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:36,639
Speaker 2: Because I'm going to rip someone's fucking face off, Like

403
00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:38,840
Speaker 2: are they gonna ask me a stupid question or what?

404
00:18:39,040 --> 00:18:43,119
Speaker 2: Like I'm in no mood. And so she started me

405
00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:46,879
Speaker 2: on HRT that afternoon, on the hormone replacement therapy, and

406
00:18:46,920 --> 00:18:50,080
Speaker 2: that definitely gave me a little a little bit more

407
00:18:50,119 --> 00:18:52,920
Speaker 2: of a breathe calm until I could get the medication.

408
00:18:53,160 --> 00:18:56,919
Speaker 2: But there's definitely a big gap in the way we

409
00:18:57,080 --> 00:19:01,880
Speaker 2: roll out our medical system, certainly for medication. And it's correct,

410
00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,240
Speaker 2: I guess, because you don't want everyone just chucking out

411
00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:07,680
Speaker 2: the meds everywhere, but waiting four and a half months

412
00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:09,720
Speaker 2: when I knew that there was something for four months

413
00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:12,399
Speaker 2: to see a psych, to see a psych before they

414
00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:15,000
Speaker 2: then sent me for a series of heart tests before

415
00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:17,159
Speaker 2: I'm then allowed to have the medicacau.

416
00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:18,160
Speaker 1: Don' no one to have a heart attack on the dexies.

417
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:20,200
Speaker 2: I mean, honestly, I wouldn't have minded at that point.

418
00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:25,640
Speaker 2: I needed such relief, but there it goes. So yeah,

419
00:19:26,200 --> 00:19:28,200
Speaker 2: over that time when you're in no mood and you've

420
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,840
Speaker 2: got to go, I don't even know what I did.

421
00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:34,000
Speaker 2: I think I just had to breathe it out and

422
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:38,520
Speaker 2: go old school with how I'd learnt to manage myself

423
00:19:38,560 --> 00:19:39,000
Speaker 2: in the past.

424
00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:42,240
Speaker 1: So just on learning to manage. So like when you

425
00:19:42,320 --> 00:19:44,840
Speaker 1: were growing up, did you have discussed your parents?

426
00:19:45,359 --> 00:19:48,760
Speaker 2: Did I have luck with my parents? No, there wasn't

427
00:19:48,800 --> 00:19:53,600
Speaker 2: that My parents both worked like two jobs. They we didn't.

428
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:56,480
Speaker 2: There was love in our home, but no one talked

429
00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:59,160
Speaker 2: about feelings like they did these days, or the way

430
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:05,280
Speaker 2: they're you know, brains are operating. So yeah, that wasn't

431
00:20:05,280 --> 00:20:07,119
Speaker 2: in our home like that. I don't think that was

432
00:20:07,119 --> 00:20:09,239
Speaker 2: like do your homework, do what you need to do,

433
00:20:09,320 --> 00:20:11,200
Speaker 2: get to bed, start again, work tomorrow.

434
00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:15,960
Speaker 1: Was Julian Morris as a kid? Was she a studious

435
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:17,440
Speaker 1: kid or a compliant kid?

436
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:20,879
Speaker 2: Always compliant, didn't want to get in trouble, So I

437
00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:22,879
Speaker 2: wasn't a sneak out of the house kind of kid.

438
00:20:23,359 --> 00:20:26,480
Speaker 2: I was trying to make my parents laugh, you know,

439
00:20:28,880 --> 00:20:33,560
Speaker 2: loved family life, love being at home again. But I

440
00:20:33,560 --> 00:20:37,280
Speaker 2: think I needed that stillness of home. But as a kid,

441
00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:38,119
Speaker 2: I don't know.

442
00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:40,200
Speaker 1: I mean, were you always funny? Though?

443
00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:44,600
Speaker 2: My parents tell amazing stories of how I was a handful.

444
00:20:44,920 --> 00:20:46,240
Speaker 1: In what regard But.

445
00:20:46,160 --> 00:20:48,800
Speaker 2: Now I look back, market's adhd. So of all of

446
00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:51,680
Speaker 2: those things that I would have beaten myself, I'm full

447
00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:55,119
Speaker 2: on not I'm an acquired taste. All of these expressions

448
00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:57,159
Speaker 2: that have been put on me from other people in

449
00:20:57,240 --> 00:20:59,960
Speaker 2: the past, I'm now like that's not actually the truth.

450
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:03,840
Speaker 2: What they know is the old roller X brain me.

451
00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:08,080
Speaker 2: I feel like knew me, feels a bit more calm

452
00:21:08,160 --> 00:21:11,000
Speaker 2: and yeah and can and can see a thought all

453
00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:12,600
Speaker 2: the way through to the end of the sentence. So

454
00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:16,600
Speaker 2: some of those things of childhood where you bagged like

455
00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:18,439
Speaker 2: you know, you could never clean your room, or you

456
00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:20,000
Speaker 2: could never do this, or you can only.

457
00:21:19,840 --> 00:21:22,040
Speaker 1: Do this you could never finish cleaning your room never.

458
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:25,080
Speaker 2: I know, I'd sit in paralysis for hours and then

459
00:21:25,119 --> 00:21:26,760
Speaker 2: I get them, you know, like why can't you do

460
00:21:26,760 --> 00:21:29,080
Speaker 2: It's gonna take you five minutes to do it or

461
00:21:29,119 --> 00:21:32,440
Speaker 2: two hours to sit here. But I'll be like, I don't.

462
00:21:32,560 --> 00:21:35,879
Speaker 2: I don't know why, but I'm just I can't. I

463
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:38,600
Speaker 2: can't do it clean the bottom of my wardrobe, for example.

464
00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:40,639
Speaker 2: Like it seems so straightforward when I'm saying it in

465
00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:42,320
Speaker 2: the sentence, couldn't do it. I'd be there for like

466
00:21:42,359 --> 00:21:45,040
Speaker 2: eight hours in my bedroom pottering and doing other things

467
00:21:45,119 --> 00:21:48,360
Speaker 2: rather than doing that chore. I mean, adhd in a nutshell.

468
00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:51,119
Speaker 1: So you weren't sort of putting things off, you just

469
00:21:51,160 --> 00:21:52,439
Speaker 1: got distracted.

470
00:21:52,440 --> 00:21:56,120
Speaker 2: Distracted at all times and actually a tremendous procrastinator.

471
00:21:56,359 --> 00:21:59,840
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, so, and well is it procrastin in that

472
00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:01,840
Speaker 1: you you don't you put off because you don't want

473
00:22:01,840 --> 00:22:04,120
Speaker 1: to do it, or you just got distracted And I'll

474
00:22:04,160 --> 00:22:04,679
Speaker 1: come back to it.

475
00:22:04,760 --> 00:22:07,080
Speaker 2: But the brain just can't do it. It just refuses to

476
00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:10,240
Speaker 2: do it. Like even getting ready this morning, I'm like, right,

477
00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:13,160
Speaker 2: it's raining today, I need to blow dry the hair.

478
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:16,760
Speaker 2: Give yourself a good one hour twenty minutes before I

479
00:22:16,880 --> 00:22:21,440
Speaker 2: let me, I'm blow dry and going fuck fuck the

480
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:24,479
Speaker 2: time paralysis is real as well, the time you know

481
00:22:24,600 --> 00:22:27,000
Speaker 2: that all of a sudden you're late, And I don't.

482
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:28,919
Speaker 2: I feel like I'm a person who's more applied than

483
00:22:28,960 --> 00:22:29,560
Speaker 2: a person who is.

484
00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:32,680
Speaker 1: In being a comedian. Then I don't know how it works.

485
00:22:32,720 --> 00:22:34,159
Speaker 1: But do you do you write your materials?

486
00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:34,280
Speaker 3: Like?

487
00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:36,040
Speaker 1: Did you sit down and say you're going to do

488
00:22:36,080 --> 00:22:39,199
Speaker 1: a show? You know you're great on homework so or

489
00:22:39,240 --> 00:22:41,360
Speaker 1: how would you just freestyle?

490
00:22:41,720 --> 00:22:44,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, we'll say if I'm doing a big tour.

491
00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:45,560
Speaker 1: I'll get a stand up.

492
00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:48,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, we stand up comedy. I would gather stories through

493
00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:52,840
Speaker 2: the year, getting ready for the next tour. And but

494
00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:55,440
Speaker 2: I don't. Yeah, I can't really sit down and write.

495
00:22:55,520 --> 00:22:57,760
Speaker 2: I don't feel like I have that directional brain. But

496
00:22:57,840 --> 00:22:59,600
Speaker 2: I could. I would have no issue with standing on

497
00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:02,160
Speaker 2: the stage if you sent me now, I was going

498
00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:05,240
Speaker 2: to a gig for twenty minutes and stuff will come.

499
00:23:05,320 --> 00:23:07,960
Speaker 1: Mostly would be terrified of that, so no, they would

500
00:23:08,280 --> 00:23:10,160
Speaker 1: like that'd have to sit down for hours and write

501
00:23:10,200 --> 00:23:12,320
Speaker 1: it all out and rehearse or rehearsor.

502
00:23:12,359 --> 00:23:15,040
Speaker 2: Comics do as well, do they? Yeah? You go kind

503
00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:16,359
Speaker 2: of two. I think I feel like you've got the

504
00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:17,880
Speaker 2: people who really work on it and then the people

505
00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:20,560
Speaker 2: who's just inside them, and they don't.

506
00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:23,600
Speaker 1: Because I mean everything, I find everything. I approach it

507
00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:25,080
Speaker 1: to you a bit more seriously, but I find nearly

508
00:23:25,080 --> 00:23:28,120
Speaker 1: everything you say funny. Because you know, after the show

509
00:23:28,119 --> 00:23:30,119
Speaker 1: we did with you, we decided that from now on,

510
00:23:30,160 --> 00:23:31,439
Speaker 1: every show were going to have a comedian in the

511
00:23:31,440 --> 00:23:33,800
Speaker 1: show because they're going to give us those moments. So

512
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:35,320
Speaker 1: we put vincenter in narration.

513
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:38,880
Speaker 2: Narration is a really important part of reality TV, where

514
00:23:38,920 --> 00:23:41,880
Speaker 2: somebody is helping you give the through line of the story. Yeah,

515
00:23:41,920 --> 00:23:45,119
Speaker 2: so comics will often do that, course they're so such high.

516
00:23:45,560 --> 00:23:49,159
Speaker 2: Uh so, Like, for example, my agent has done a

517
00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:51,840
Speaker 2: couple of little classes on how to deal with ADHD

518
00:23:52,040 --> 00:23:55,440
Speaker 2: children because she has found a significant number of people

519
00:23:55,480 --> 00:23:58,600
Speaker 2: in the comedy industry have it, and she's now found

520
00:23:58,800 --> 00:24:00,720
Speaker 2: that there's little tricks that she can do to keep

521
00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:03,479
Speaker 2: some of her artists on track. Then that's what she'll do.

522
00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:07,600
Speaker 2: So something's due tomorrow yesterday, she'll send me a thing saying,

523
00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:10,160
Speaker 2: can you just fill out those answers because you've got

524
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:12,840
Speaker 2: tomorrow and then it's due the next day. So a

525
00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:15,920
Speaker 2: couple of those little signposts when you have ADHD employees

526
00:24:16,640 --> 00:24:21,840
Speaker 2: or you know, clients. But she also said, you know

527
00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:24,480
Speaker 2: you might arrive late, but you're going to work through

528
00:24:24,560 --> 00:24:28,680
Speaker 2: lunch and your work into the night. So an ADHD employee,

529
00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:33,280
Speaker 2: while appearing late to the system, we'll give you so

530
00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:37,879
Speaker 2: much more when they're working and interested. Of course, you

531
00:24:37,920 --> 00:24:42,520
Speaker 2: know the timings are tricky, but once you are focused

532
00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:45,359
Speaker 2: on the work, you're going to get the best there is.

533
00:24:46,800 --> 00:24:48,879
Speaker 1: But not every comedian is likely because I remember when

534
00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:52,120
Speaker 1: year we as, Vince surrended you to be the comedian

535
00:24:52,240 --> 00:24:55,080
Speaker 1: person in the show to give us those fillers, and

536
00:24:56,200 --> 00:25:02,200
Speaker 1: Vince not like that, is not like you. Vince's very conservative,

537
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:07,639
Speaker 1: very fairly quiet. Yeah, spoken that.

538
00:25:07,800 --> 00:25:09,399
Speaker 2: I think it's the two sides of the comic.

539
00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:12,719
Speaker 1: I really do hear some stage he performs. Yeah, but

540
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:17,080
Speaker 1: he's very he's a bit more methodical, mood beautiful.

541
00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:20,520
Speaker 2: I love Vince, Yeah, I love him. But also I

542
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:23,320
Speaker 2: think we see it in the jungle when comedians come

543
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:25,959
Speaker 2: in as well, is that you are through through the experience,

544
00:25:26,600 --> 00:25:28,960
Speaker 2: certainly of the Apprentice, where you are trying to show

545
00:25:29,520 --> 00:25:31,560
Speaker 2: I think I've got intelligence. I'm trying to sell it

546
00:25:31,600 --> 00:25:32,159
Speaker 2: to these other.

547
00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:33,120
Speaker 1: Roots, you can do the task.

548
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:35,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, all I need to do is just show that.

549
00:25:35,440 --> 00:25:39,280
Speaker 2: So apart from that urgency, certainly in a comedian's mind

550
00:25:39,359 --> 00:25:43,400
Speaker 2: is I don't look very funny. I'm going to ruin

551
00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:46,320
Speaker 2: this for later. This won't give me ticket sales. People

552
00:25:46,359 --> 00:25:49,679
Speaker 2: are going to say, I'm a bitch. So yeah, for

553
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:53,720
Speaker 2: comedians in reality programs, if they've dealt with a few

554
00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:57,439
Speaker 2: of their demons, I find then they're spectacular because then

555
00:25:57,480 --> 00:25:59,879
Speaker 2: they can take those observations and you know, as opposed

556
00:25:59,920 --> 00:26:03,680
Speaker 2: to everything, how dare you do that and get good,

557
00:26:04,400 --> 00:26:08,080
Speaker 2: get you know, emotionally invested in every single moment? Is

558
00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:10,600
Speaker 2: if it's possible to be able to be the observer?

559
00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:13,480
Speaker 2: I mean, I think the narrator is the winning role

560
00:26:14,800 --> 00:26:15,920
Speaker 2: through every reality series.

561
00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:19,440
Speaker 1: It is, so the fetterman's going to just maybe you

562
00:26:19,480 --> 00:26:21,960
Speaker 1: could have just explained to audience what it is. It's

563
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:25,000
Speaker 1: a version of what we would call it kind.

564
00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:28,760
Speaker 2: Of speed, right judgment you have the back in the

565
00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:32,640
Speaker 2: day too far. Look, it's so it is a dex amthetamine.

566
00:26:32,760 --> 00:26:35,080
Speaker 2: So me this time last year, I believement I would

567
00:26:35,080 --> 00:26:37,600
Speaker 2: have thought drugs, that those sort of drugs are not

568
00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 2: for me. I've never been into coke. I've never been

569
00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:42,919
Speaker 2: into pump up your volumes. I've just but now I

570
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:45,360
Speaker 2: know it's because I radio AHD. You wouldn't have done

571
00:26:45,359 --> 00:26:47,960
Speaker 2: anything for you would have been like, oh, yeah, that

572
00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:52,800
Speaker 2: sounds good. Does anyone want a biscuit? So when I yeah,

573
00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:55,040
Speaker 2: when I went to do all the research of what

574
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:57,760
Speaker 2: you can do, there's a shorter acting tablet but feels

575
00:26:57,960 --> 00:27:02,879
Speaker 2: much more Yes, whereas the dex am FETA means they

576
00:27:02,960 --> 00:27:05,119
Speaker 2: do roll out over eight hours, so they're not a

577
00:27:05,119 --> 00:27:10,440
Speaker 2: big heartbeat nightmare, but it definitely makes me feel much

578
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:15,880
Speaker 2: more motivated and instead of me battling myself. For example,

579
00:27:16,200 --> 00:27:18,879
Speaker 2: doorbell goes off, I know something's been delivered. I'll go

580
00:27:18,920 --> 00:27:20,520
Speaker 2: down and get that. I must go down and get that.

581
00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:22,080
Speaker 2: Have I've gone down to get that? I don't think

582
00:27:22,080 --> 00:27:24,840
Speaker 2: I get that. With a dex am feta means just

583
00:27:24,840 --> 00:27:29,800
Speaker 2: pop down the stairs and get it. A huge difference,

584
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:31,879
Speaker 2: a difference, Mark is out of this world.

585
00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:33,800
Speaker 1: It sounds simple, but it's a huge difference.

586
00:27:34,920 --> 00:27:39,840
Speaker 2: And I definitely, you know, I felt over the last

587
00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:42,800
Speaker 2: couple of years this is how I am say, I've

588
00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:45,000
Speaker 2: learned a way to deal with it. Yeah, But when

589
00:27:45,040 --> 00:27:47,800
Speaker 2: age comes in and menopause comes in. I think that's

590
00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:50,320
Speaker 2: when all of a sudden you don't have the ability

591
00:27:50,359 --> 00:27:52,800
Speaker 2: to mask it as well, and that's when you need

592
00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:56,240
Speaker 2: some help. But recognizing when you need that help, I'll

593
00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:58,919
Speaker 2: tell you what. Being alone in my house, not my children,

594
00:27:58,960 --> 00:28:02,080
Speaker 2: but being without a partner has really allowed me to

595
00:28:02,119 --> 00:28:05,040
Speaker 2: self regulate. It's really allowed me to just go what

596
00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:07,399
Speaker 2: are my what are my good points? What are my

597
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:12,040
Speaker 2: bad points? How do I just be happier?

598
00:28:12,520 --> 00:28:15,440
Speaker 1: I don't know even temper we were talking about, let's

599
00:28:15,440 --> 00:28:17,840
Speaker 1: just talk about because I think that's I mean, it's

600
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:19,439
Speaker 1: the elephant the room for me anyway. I mean we

601
00:28:19,440 --> 00:28:21,159
Speaker 1: can see to talk about your comedy and stuff like that,

602
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:23,480
Speaker 1: but like I want to talk about some other stuff

603
00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:28,440
Speaker 1: with you. If you don't mind. You're divorced, you're now

604
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:33,159
Speaker 1: you're on your own. Let's call it. I should ask you,

605
00:28:33,200 --> 00:28:34,080
Speaker 1: do you have anybody else?

606
00:28:34,320 --> 00:28:37,960
Speaker 2: No, sir, no, dude, no do or do de No?

607
00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:40,160
Speaker 2: My girls said, Mommy are going to go after girls.

608
00:28:40,280 --> 00:28:43,120
Speaker 2: I said, listen, it's not for me, but I'm sure

609
00:28:43,120 --> 00:28:45,880
Speaker 2: it's lovely. But yeah, I think when you get divorced

610
00:28:45,920 --> 00:28:48,440
Speaker 2: and well, I cut my hair off as well.

611
00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:51,200
Speaker 1: What I cut my hair off.

612
00:28:51,200 --> 00:28:55,760
Speaker 2: You do this groovy short hair. Oh this is hilarious.

613
00:28:55,760 --> 00:28:58,880
Speaker 2: But and then yeah, everyone was like, oh, she's going

614
00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:03,240
Speaker 2: to come out and announce announced that you speak that

615
00:29:03,280 --> 00:29:07,400
Speaker 2: I've decided to yes, be with Lartiest. Yeah it's not

616
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:07,680
Speaker 2: for me.

617
00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:11,320
Speaker 1: No, So you don't have a you don't have a partner.

618
00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:13,880
Speaker 2: I don't see it happening, Mark, I think twenty years

619
00:29:13,920 --> 00:29:19,200
Speaker 2: of being. I mean, you know, I'm scorched into the earth,

620
00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:20,240
Speaker 2: to be honest.

621
00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:23,680
Speaker 1: So is it because you feel as it's not worth

622
00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:25,040
Speaker 1: as bruised? You're bruised.

623
00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:28,200
Speaker 2: I think, yeah, why don't.

624
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:29,840
Speaker 1: I see bruised? Perhaps?

625
00:29:30,640 --> 00:29:33,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm just trying to think of exactly what the

626
00:29:33,560 --> 00:29:36,800
Speaker 2: wording is. I think that I'm having a better life

627
00:29:36,840 --> 00:29:37,640
Speaker 2: by myself.

628
00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:39,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's cool.

629
00:29:39,360 --> 00:29:42,520
Speaker 2: And I think that in terms of love, like I'm

630
00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:44,600
Speaker 2: in terms of rolling around whatever. I think I might

631
00:29:44,640 --> 00:29:47,120
Speaker 2: have had all my roots. So if I have great fact,

632
00:29:47,240 --> 00:29:54,320
Speaker 2: what's done? Then companionship. I I'm kind of I'm kind

633
00:29:54,320 --> 00:29:56,240
Speaker 2: of got companionship in my own head.

634
00:29:57,520 --> 00:29:59,840
Speaker 1: But that's good though, I don't mind. I mean, you're independent.

635
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,240
Speaker 2: It means I'm not at home lonely. Why why don't

636
00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:06,000
Speaker 2: a guy like me. Why, yeah, that's but now I also,

637
00:30:06,560 --> 00:30:10,360
Speaker 2: since getting divorced, the greatest lesson I taught myself, I

638
00:30:10,400 --> 00:30:14,040
Speaker 2: think is now I think in terms of instead of

639
00:30:14,120 --> 00:30:17,680
Speaker 2: trying to prove to everyone, I'm decent, I'm a friend,

640
00:30:17,680 --> 00:30:20,240
Speaker 2: I'm loyal, I'm all the good stuff, and I'm constantly

641
00:30:20,240 --> 00:30:22,640
Speaker 2: on this broadcast when I'm around friends that I like,

642
00:30:22,720 --> 00:30:24,680
Speaker 2: where I'm like, I did this amazing thing, and I'm

643
00:30:24,680 --> 00:30:28,080
Speaker 2: this and I'm that. Now, after the divorce, I feel

644
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:30,840
Speaker 2: like I say, do you behave well enough to have

645
00:30:30,920 --> 00:30:31,600
Speaker 2: access to me?

646
00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:35,120
Speaker 1: And if you don't, fucking beat it, see you later.

647
00:30:36,280 --> 00:30:39,120
Speaker 2: It's as simple as that. So all of those behaviors,

648
00:30:39,720 --> 00:30:42,640
Speaker 2: my children included, are you behaving well enough to have

649
00:30:42,680 --> 00:30:44,840
Speaker 2: access to me? And if you're not behaving well enough,

650
00:30:44,880 --> 00:30:46,640
Speaker 2: then I'm sorry, computer denied.

651
00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:48,960
Speaker 1: So I have do you actually say to them or

652
00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:49,480
Speaker 1: that's just.

653
00:30:49,840 --> 00:30:53,360
Speaker 2: With the children I do. I mean, that's rare my kids.

654
00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:58,080
Speaker 2: We're a pretty good party of three. You think I

655
00:30:58,120 --> 00:31:01,360
Speaker 2: don't have those teenagers. I just have the like I

656
00:31:01,440 --> 00:31:03,600
Speaker 2: just want to do. I just want to do better

657
00:31:03,640 --> 00:31:06,480
Speaker 2: and just get through tomorrow. Mom, I'll got those teenagers.

658
00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:07,440
Speaker 1: You're blessing in that.

659
00:31:07,520 --> 00:31:10,640
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, We've worked hard on it, all three of us.

660
00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:13,680
Speaker 2: That was a weird transition becoming going from a family

661
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 2: of four to a party of three. That was unusual

662
00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:20,080
Speaker 2: in that it was just us girls, and certainly the

663
00:31:20,120 --> 00:31:23,560
Speaker 2: girls when the divorce first went down, I don't think

664
00:31:23,560 --> 00:31:25,440
Speaker 2: they had a lot of trust in me.

665
00:31:26,080 --> 00:31:28,720
Speaker 1: In you? Is it because Dan was sort of running

666
00:31:28,760 --> 00:31:30,160
Speaker 1: the show kind of? Yeah?

667
00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:31,360
Speaker 2: Well Dan was a house.

668
00:31:31,280 --> 00:31:35,360
Speaker 1: Husband, so he was a chef originally? Is that wrong? No?

669
00:31:35,440 --> 00:31:35,640
Speaker 1: He was?

670
00:31:36,320 --> 00:31:39,600
Speaker 2: What was he originally? I'm slapped down, no good joke.

671
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:42,800
Speaker 2: He was in advertising advertising.

672
00:31:42,960 --> 00:31:44,880
Speaker 1: For some reason, I thought he was a chef. I mean,

673
00:31:44,920 --> 00:31:47,440
Speaker 1: I'm going back ten years, twelve years, maybe because you

674
00:31:47,440 --> 00:31:49,600
Speaker 1: probably told me does all the cooking or something, but yeah,

675
00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:51,720
Speaker 1: but you did it. You were out the front making

676
00:31:51,760 --> 00:31:53,040
Speaker 1: the quid, and.

677
00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:56,160
Speaker 2: You know, absolutely like any black lots of homes, Yeah,

678
00:31:56,160 --> 00:31:58,640
Speaker 2: they have a partner at home and a partner that's

679
00:31:58,840 --> 00:32:01,520
Speaker 2: out and about the interesting thing about the partner that's

680
00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:04,160
Speaker 2: flogging it at work, even though the person at home

681
00:32:04,280 --> 00:32:07,880
Speaker 2: is working very hard. When the person comes home from work,

682
00:32:08,680 --> 00:32:11,080
Speaker 2: you kind of walk through the door and you're here

683
00:32:11,080 --> 00:32:14,960
Speaker 2: we go. The next massive job starts, which is being

684
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:18,360
Speaker 2: part of this family so there was I felt like

685
00:32:18,360 --> 00:32:21,080
Speaker 2: there was never any respite in the Certainly towards the

686
00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:23,160
Speaker 2: end of my marriage, I felt like weekend at Bernie's

687
00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:25,520
Speaker 2: where I'll just be wheeled out for another gig, like

688
00:32:25,600 --> 00:32:29,840
Speaker 2: I died, you know, and no one had noticed I died.

689
00:32:30,440 --> 00:32:34,080
Speaker 1: And in terms of management, did Dan manage you or

690
00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:35,200
Speaker 1: manage you?

691
00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:38,800
Speaker 2: I mean on every level, yes, but no, no, no,

692
00:32:38,840 --> 00:32:42,280
Speaker 2: I've got a fantastic, fantastic agent manager I've been with

693
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:42,640
Speaker 2: for years.

694
00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:44,720
Speaker 1: But Dan was happy for you to go, and he

695
00:32:44,760 --> 00:32:47,520
Speaker 1: would certainly after He never said, hey, Julie, can you

696
00:32:47,560 --> 00:32:50,720
Speaker 1: just stop here, let's work on a relationship or hang

697
00:32:50,760 --> 00:32:52,920
Speaker 1: out together? Yes, we are you doing too much?

698
00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:55,000
Speaker 2: I think we did all of that. But I think

699
00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:57,160
Speaker 2: there's a cycle to it. I think there's like a

700
00:32:57,160 --> 00:33:02,640
Speaker 2: happy cycle. Gets a bit tricky now, it's getting tense,

701
00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:06,959
Speaker 2: ends up in an event of argument whatever, and then

702
00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:08,400
Speaker 2: I'd be like, well, if you don't like it, there's

703
00:33:08,440 --> 00:33:12,040
Speaker 2: the door. Apparently not the right thing to say, and

704
00:33:12,080 --> 00:33:14,040
Speaker 2: then we get back to the honeymoon period again, where

705
00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:15,479
Speaker 2: I'd be like, oh my god, thank god I got

706
00:33:15,480 --> 00:33:21,520
Speaker 2: my husband back. So that continuous, but in the end

707
00:33:21,640 --> 00:33:24,200
Speaker 2: I literally just said to him you know, you're not

708
00:33:24,280 --> 00:33:25,920
Speaker 2: enjoying it. I'm not enjoying it. What are we doing?

709
00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:29,160
Speaker 2: This seems like a massive waste of our lives. Yeah.

710
00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:30,840
Speaker 2: I don't think you like me and I'm not particularly

711
00:33:30,840 --> 00:33:31,360
Speaker 2: fond of you.

712
00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:34,080
Speaker 1: It was like like it was that. I think it

713
00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:36,640
Speaker 1: had got to that. But did you have that conversation?

714
00:33:38,400 --> 00:33:41,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, we absolutely had that conversation. Yeah. I remember

715
00:33:41,400 --> 00:33:43,640
Speaker 2: the morning of just going can you can you come

716
00:33:43,680 --> 00:33:46,520
Speaker 2: and have a chat? This is bullshit. I'm not living

717
00:33:46,560 --> 00:33:46,800
Speaker 2: like this.

718
00:33:50,360 --> 00:33:55,200
Speaker 1: That that that sort of come to Jesus moment, Yeah,

719
00:33:55,520 --> 00:33:59,040
Speaker 1: we need to talk. What what what is it? What's

720
00:33:59,080 --> 00:34:03,720
Speaker 1: the last straw? How do you this time? Oh?

721
00:34:04,160 --> 00:34:07,920
Speaker 2: God, Mark, you're going to die? The last straw was

722
00:34:07,960 --> 00:34:08,759
Speaker 2: when I saw you?

723
00:34:10,320 --> 00:34:11,960
Speaker 1: Where? Where? Where was it?

724
00:34:12,400 --> 00:34:15,359
Speaker 2: We've done a podcast, We've done a podcast together, and

725
00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:17,239
Speaker 2: that day i'd spoken a lot about you know, if

726
00:34:17,440 --> 00:34:19,560
Speaker 2: my marriage ever breaks up, I reckon it'll be my fault.

727
00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:22,520
Speaker 2: I was still in that weird headspace, right the people

728
00:34:22,520 --> 00:34:26,760
Speaker 2: pleasing and that weekend, so I think we were together

729
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:30,479
Speaker 2: on the Friday. On the Saturday we flew home and

730
00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:33,640
Speaker 2: I don't know, he said something in the car like

731
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:35,800
Speaker 2: the girl said, you were real punish over the weekend

732
00:34:35,920 --> 00:34:40,160
Speaker 2: or something like that, and I was like, I was

733
00:34:40,239 --> 00:34:44,719
Speaker 2: seating by the way, I was not equal at all contributor,

734
00:34:44,760 --> 00:34:49,879
Speaker 2: but I was contributed to the nervous anxiety in our

735
00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:54,080
Speaker 2: house because I would be stressed trying to make everything

736
00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:58,319
Speaker 2: work and make everything you know, and everyone, yeah, absolutely,

737
00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:02,680
Speaker 2: while pleasing no one. And so that as we got home,

738
00:35:03,400 --> 00:35:07,799
Speaker 2: I went to a hotel, I dropped the family off.

739
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:09,800
Speaker 2: I was driving because my car was out at the airport.

740
00:35:09,840 --> 00:35:11,480
Speaker 2: I dropped the family home at the house and I'm

741
00:35:11,520 --> 00:35:14,279
Speaker 2: just like fine. Of course he had said something like

742
00:35:14,320 --> 00:35:16,120
Speaker 2: the girl said you were punished over the weekend or

743
00:35:16,120 --> 00:35:18,040
Speaker 2: something like that, and I was so hurt that the

744
00:35:18,080 --> 00:35:20,920
Speaker 2: girls would speak to him about me. And then I

745
00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:23,320
Speaker 2: kind of like, this is do you know what? You

746
00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:25,880
Speaker 2: can all get fucked And went to a hotel. And

747
00:35:25,920 --> 00:35:28,000
Speaker 2: then when I checked into the hotel, the person that

748
00:35:28,040 --> 00:35:29,959
Speaker 2: the host said to me hotel said to me, lots

749
00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:32,319
Speaker 2: of footballers come here when they leave their wives. While

750
00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:35,680
Speaker 2: I'm at the front desk, I was like, wait, what

751
00:35:35,680 --> 00:35:38,520
Speaker 2: what And then that night I'm like, if I'm staying

752
00:35:38,520 --> 00:35:41,440
Speaker 2: in a hotel in Melbourne away from my private home,

753
00:35:41,520 --> 00:35:44,520
Speaker 2: something is desperately wrong here, and instead of continuing to

754
00:35:44,560 --> 00:35:46,120
Speaker 2: talk about it, I need to go and do something

755
00:35:46,120 --> 00:35:49,120
Speaker 2: about it. And I slept, woke up the next morning,

756
00:35:49,200 --> 00:35:52,600
Speaker 2: went home and was just like, this is it. Let's

757
00:35:52,640 --> 00:35:54,120
Speaker 2: start to untangle the web.

758
00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:57,239
Speaker 1: And can you share with me the process of that lake?

759
00:35:58,320 --> 00:36:00,600
Speaker 1: How does it work untangling the word? Because this is

760
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:02,640
Speaker 1: something you've been working on, this web, you've been moving

761
00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:05,560
Speaker 1: for twenty years living. By the way, it's not just

762
00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:08,000
Speaker 1: the web. It's not just all the finances and the

763
00:36:08,160 --> 00:36:11,160
Speaker 1: structures and who owns the house and blah blah blah,

764
00:36:11,200 --> 00:36:14,320
Speaker 1: but it's the relationships. You know, you're and you're there's

765
00:36:14,440 --> 00:36:18,400
Speaker 1: the person who Julia is relative to her kids, to

766
00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:22,279
Speaker 1: her husband, to a family, to outside of the to

767
00:36:22,320 --> 00:36:24,680
Speaker 1: your fans, to everybody else. Julie Morrow's married to Dan.

768
00:36:25,880 --> 00:36:29,040
Speaker 1: That's it sounds simple, but it's quite complex. Yeah, what's

769
00:36:29,080 --> 00:36:32,320
Speaker 1: the unweaving part? Look like the unweaving part is this

770
00:36:32,560 --> 00:36:34,960
Speaker 1: pre getting dex and feta means too by the way,

771
00:36:35,040 --> 00:36:37,800
Speaker 1: Oh my god, yes, sir, that might have been mental

772
00:36:37,800 --> 00:36:38,319
Speaker 1: for I.

773
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:41,840
Speaker 2: Reckon. I was, you know, we're like Ursula's sea witch

774
00:36:41,880 --> 00:36:45,080
Speaker 2: conscious up the sea is how I felt inside. My

775
00:36:45,440 --> 00:36:49,440
Speaker 2: eye was exploding and we it was actually very very

776
00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:51,799
Speaker 2: amicable those first few months because I was kind of like,

777
00:36:51,840 --> 00:36:56,120
Speaker 2: you know what, he he can't work, and I'll build again.

778
00:36:56,320 --> 00:36:59,560
Speaker 2: And I mean there's nothing like a at the time

779
00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:02,759
Speaker 2: fifty four year old woman in Australian television building. Again,

780
00:37:02,760 --> 00:37:07,200
Speaker 2: it seems like so many opportunities. We did it something

781
00:37:07,239 --> 00:37:11,440
Speaker 2: called collaborative divorce, which is where it's essentially four meetings

782
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:15,439
Speaker 2: and of those meetings the outcome is absolute. And over

783
00:37:15,480 --> 00:37:19,680
Speaker 2: those four meetings you kind of split the assets the

784
00:37:19,760 --> 00:37:21,880
Speaker 2: time with the children that whatever, how are you going

785
00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:25,879
Speaker 2: to roll? And it was thirty grand ahead and thirty

786
00:37:25,880 --> 00:37:27,920
Speaker 2: grudhead he has in he paid thirty grand.

787
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:31,280
Speaker 1: I paid thirty grand to the people doing the mediation,

788
00:37:31,400 --> 00:37:31,600
Speaker 1: to the.

789
00:37:32,440 --> 00:37:37,120
Speaker 2: To the lawyers. So from there, yeah.

790
00:37:37,120 --> 00:37:40,800
Speaker 1: It's a four days and ago I'm sorry, four periods

791
00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:42,000
Speaker 1: of negotiation.

792
00:37:41,800 --> 00:37:43,719
Speaker 2: Kind of yeah, and all a lot of that sort

793
00:37:43,719 --> 00:37:47,239
Speaker 2: of done backstage beforehand, where you'd be like, okay, well

794
00:37:47,280 --> 00:37:48,879
Speaker 2: the children are going to do week on, week off

795
00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:52,439
Speaker 2: or or however. That rolls all that paperwork and once

796
00:37:52,520 --> 00:37:57,160
Speaker 2: it's filed there is no coming back. Because I was

797
00:37:57,200 --> 00:37:59,560
Speaker 2: just thinking if my earnings did all of a sudden

798
00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:04,239
Speaker 2: take us super positive trajectory. I didn't want anybody coming

799
00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:04,680
Speaker 2: back for that.

800
00:38:05,080 --> 00:38:09,200
Speaker 1: So that they're called consent orders. Usually you both consent

801
00:38:09,280 --> 00:38:11,400
Speaker 1: to the order that the court's going to give because

802
00:38:11,400 --> 00:38:13,359
Speaker 1: you've already made the deal as opposed to the court

803
00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:14,080
Speaker 1: making the deal for you.

804
00:38:14,239 --> 00:38:15,240
Speaker 2: Hundred hundred hundred.

805
00:38:15,600 --> 00:38:17,279
Speaker 1: Had you end up you're doing any good out it?

806
00:38:17,360 --> 00:38:18,920
Speaker 1: I mean, did you Was it a fair split?

807
00:38:20,160 --> 00:38:24,200
Speaker 2: Well, interestingly, I mean I wouldn't use the words seventy

808
00:38:24,200 --> 00:38:26,680
Speaker 2: five percent of the assets is what I did not

809
00:38:26,840 --> 00:38:29,400
Speaker 2: end up with. But let's use it like a between

810
00:38:29,440 --> 00:38:31,720
Speaker 2: seventy three percent and seventy five percent of the assets

811
00:38:31,760 --> 00:38:35,080
Speaker 2: I did not end up with. So that was That's

812
00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:38,719
Speaker 2: been quite a thought while, isn't it, Because if you've

813
00:38:38,719 --> 00:38:42,480
Speaker 2: got a partner that doesn't work, they can't rebuild or

814
00:38:42,760 --> 00:38:45,759
Speaker 2: work or I don't know, that's apparently what they can't

815
00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:47,480
Speaker 2: do in the eyes of the loss.

816
00:38:47,520 --> 00:38:49,400
Speaker 1: Well, the current family law, which by the way, was

817
00:38:49,719 --> 00:38:53,439
Speaker 1: a consequence of Lionel Murphy who ex Labor Party guy

818
00:38:53,480 --> 00:38:57,319
Speaker 1: who and a judge who I think in the mid

819
00:38:57,320 --> 00:39:00,800
Speaker 1: seventies to change the Matrimonial Causes Act to the Family

820
00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:04,960
Speaker 1: Law Act, and the result of that was to allow

821
00:39:06,239 --> 00:39:09,719
Speaker 1: the spouse or the non working party to the relationship

822
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:13,080
Speaker 1: to get more than the other party because the other

823
00:39:13,120 --> 00:39:15,200
Speaker 1: party had the ability to make more money or to

824
00:39:15,280 --> 00:39:15,799
Speaker 1: start again.

825
00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:19,719
Speaker 2: It does sound fair, It's sort of sound fair and

826
00:39:20,200 --> 00:39:22,680
Speaker 2: totally if you've put your heart and soul into the

827
00:39:22,760 --> 00:39:25,279
Speaker 2: home and making sure that children are there and that

828
00:39:25,360 --> 00:39:30,839
Speaker 2: the person who's working can work, totally fair. But when

829
00:39:30,920 --> 00:39:34,040
Speaker 2: you're on the twenty five percent after a lifetime.

830
00:39:33,520 --> 00:39:36,520
Speaker 1: Of working and you're just like, it doesn't seem fair.

831
00:39:36,560 --> 00:39:40,400
Speaker 2: He's already working. It didn't work for twenty years, so

832
00:39:40,480 --> 00:39:43,480
Speaker 2: wait what what? Uh? People pleasing?

833
00:39:44,400 --> 00:39:48,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, because I asked you are at the beginning. Do

834
00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:53,319
Speaker 1: you feel as though your personal condition, like ADHD and

835
00:39:53,360 --> 00:39:57,120
Speaker 1: all its things that hang around it, do you feel

836
00:39:57,120 --> 00:40:03,000
Speaker 1: as though that you might have been We're not manipulated taken.

837
00:40:02,760 --> 00:40:06,520
Speaker 2: For a ride? Yes, it was a lot, Yes, I do.

838
00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:09,799
Speaker 2: I think that I'm easy to manipulate in that way,

839
00:40:09,960 --> 00:40:12,560
Speaker 2: for sure. I think maybe that's why I've also turned

840
00:40:12,560 --> 00:40:14,359
Speaker 2: off any sort of possibility of having a partner.

841
00:40:14,400 --> 00:40:14,880
Speaker 1: But there.

842
00:40:16,640 --> 00:40:17,799
Speaker 2: Couldn't be manipulated.

843
00:40:17,840 --> 00:40:20,359
Speaker 1: Well, you mightn't even know you've been manipulated. I mean what,

844
00:40:20,400 --> 00:40:23,880
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, it might not be a positive move to

845
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:26,680
Speaker 1: manipulate you. But it's just an instinct that here's an

846
00:40:26,680 --> 00:40:29,240
Speaker 1: opportunity I can just take advantage of this situation. Yeah,

847
00:40:29,280 --> 00:40:30,799
Speaker 1: it's a bit like the way I was in the printer.

848
00:40:30,920 --> 00:40:32,920
Speaker 1: So I didn't I didn't sort of eat in a

849
00:40:32,960 --> 00:40:35,400
Speaker 1: sinister way try and take advantage of Julia Morris. But

850
00:40:35,440 --> 00:40:38,320
Speaker 1: I knew there was something there, an advantage for the show, absolutely,

851
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:40,919
Speaker 1: so I just said, well, let's just you know, whenever

852
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:43,480
Speaker 1: we're going to dance, go and see Julie Morris get

853
00:40:43,480 --> 00:40:44,880
Speaker 1: a comment from the narrative.

854
00:40:45,080 --> 00:40:49,319
Speaker 2: Also, super busy people are easy to manipulate because they're

855
00:40:49,320 --> 00:40:54,080
Speaker 2: not really noticing any consistency of weirdness. So if you're

856
00:40:54,239 --> 00:40:57,000
Speaker 2: super busy, capable, whatever, you don't actually even need as

857
00:40:57,040 --> 00:40:58,920
Speaker 2: much emotional feeding in a relationship.

858
00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:01,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, totally, You're not reliant.

859
00:41:01,600 --> 00:41:04,480
Speaker 2: No, no, not at all. It's absolutely self sourcing at

860
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:05,520
Speaker 2: all times, all the time.

861
00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:08,440
Speaker 1: Self sourcing actually is a very good word, a very

862
00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:13,960
Speaker 1: good description. Do you your low maintenance, Yeah, totally, low maintenance.

863
00:41:13,560 --> 00:41:17,520
Speaker 2: Totally the heavy maintenance. I take care of myself, so

864
00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:19,480
Speaker 2: you know, Phil in my car petrol, do any of

865
00:41:19,480 --> 00:41:22,239
Speaker 2: the heavy like you know that sort of maintenance, I

866
00:41:22,280 --> 00:41:24,560
Speaker 2: can take care of. What I think I need in

867
00:41:24,560 --> 00:41:27,280
Speaker 2: a partner is to walk side by side in life,

868
00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:30,000
Speaker 2: not to constantly feel like I'm in trouble or haven't

869
00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:32,000
Speaker 2: got enough work. And I just feel like for most

870
00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:34,880
Speaker 2: of my married life, I just kept hearing we're running

871
00:41:34,880 --> 00:41:36,760
Speaker 2: out of money, we don't have any money.

872
00:41:36,840 --> 00:41:38,359
Speaker 1: That's why I ever heard get another gig.

873
00:41:38,520 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 2: Was walking work and work and work and work and working.

874
00:41:41,840 --> 00:41:45,520
Speaker 2: And now that I'm a charged, oh well, I'll take

875
00:41:45,560 --> 00:41:46,920
Speaker 2: what I need you.

876
00:41:46,920 --> 00:41:47,760
Speaker 1: So the rebuild.

877
00:41:48,200 --> 00:41:51,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, now, the rebuild I worked out. I think in

878
00:41:51,920 --> 00:41:56,200
Speaker 2: my own mind that I wanted our house. It was

879
00:41:56,239 --> 00:41:58,040
Speaker 2: not paid off. I think there was like a one

880
00:41:58,120 --> 00:42:00,439
Speaker 2: hundred thousand paid off the house something like that, which

881
00:42:00,520 --> 00:42:03,840
Speaker 2: is no small feet, but because I just thought I

882
00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:05,880
Speaker 2: don't want to move. I like the idea that this

883
00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:08,960
Speaker 2: is the house we've purchased, that my children feel like

884
00:42:09,120 --> 00:42:13,279
Speaker 2: is their home. I don't know at the time, what

885
00:42:13,400 --> 00:42:15,759
Speaker 2: fifty four fifty five if I would get another loan

886
00:42:15,960 --> 00:42:21,040
Speaker 2: as a single woman for a house, like with what's

887
00:42:21,120 --> 00:42:23,920
Speaker 2: my life spent? You know, am I going to make

888
00:42:23,960 --> 00:42:25,040
Speaker 2: the end of the loan.

889
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:30,280
Speaker 1: So we should have just explained, Julie, because that's important.

890
00:42:31,320 --> 00:42:34,600
Speaker 1: You're saying at fifty four, if I've got a thirty

891
00:42:34,640 --> 00:42:36,719
Speaker 1: year loan. For argument, saying, if I've got a new

892
00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:38,480
Speaker 1: loan to be thirty a loon, which means I'll be

893
00:42:38,520 --> 00:42:40,880
Speaker 1: eighty four by the time it's paid off, will I

894
00:42:41,000 --> 00:42:42,200
Speaker 1: be able to pay it off because I might not

895
00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:43,640
Speaker 1: be able to work from seventy.

896
00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:45,560
Speaker 2: Well what about if tomorrow I'll get a punch in

897
00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:47,759
Speaker 2: the throat because I'm such a smart ass and then

898
00:42:47,760 --> 00:42:48,279
Speaker 2: I can't work?

899
00:42:48,360 --> 00:42:52,160
Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah, how all this that's and you know it

900
00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:56,680
Speaker 1: shouldn't exist. But I'm not. Oh you're you know, you're

901
00:42:56,680 --> 00:42:58,799
Speaker 1: a woman seeing a woman like maybe I'm not. I'm

902
00:42:58,800 --> 00:43:00,920
Speaker 1: going to get it discriminated again. So at least it's

903
00:43:00,920 --> 00:43:05,160
Speaker 1: probably not the case. But your age will sort of

904
00:43:05,320 --> 00:43:08,640
Speaker 1: by definition discriminate against you because the lender has to

905
00:43:08,680 --> 00:43:10,759
Speaker 1: make sure you can pay them back totally. That's how

906
00:43:10,800 --> 00:43:14,400
Speaker 1: the lender works. Absolutely, So you know you're thinking to yourself, well,

907
00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:18,279
Speaker 1: and that's that's massively confronting and you probably have to

908
00:43:18,280 --> 00:43:21,480
Speaker 1: borrow more money against the house to pay them out. Yeah,

909
00:43:21,560 --> 00:43:22,520
Speaker 1: so did you?

910
00:43:22,560 --> 00:43:25,960
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, And also the advice was pay it all,

911
00:43:26,719 --> 00:43:31,400
Speaker 2: pay the maintenance, pay the pray the rent, pay the whatever,

912
00:43:31,719 --> 00:43:36,240
Speaker 2: just pay pay a big chunk instead of this weekly

913
00:43:36,840 --> 00:43:40,960
Speaker 2: tearing away at you for however many years, that no way.

914
00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:44,520
Speaker 2: So even though there was lots of big payments up

915
00:43:44,520 --> 00:43:47,400
Speaker 2: front and I was like, oh my god, I've gotten

916
00:43:48,440 --> 00:43:53,080
Speaker 2: very little, but I don't I got me the original earner. Yeah,

917
00:43:53,160 --> 00:43:55,600
Speaker 2: so I'm like, okay, let's turn up the corporates, let's

918
00:43:55,600 --> 00:43:57,239
Speaker 2: turn up to this, let's turn up for that. How

919
00:43:57,280 --> 00:43:59,600
Speaker 2: can I work more efficiently to earn more money with

920
00:43:59,760 --> 00:44:02,000
Speaker 2: less hours being put in Because the other thing is

921
00:44:02,160 --> 00:44:05,319
Speaker 2: I'm a single mum of teenage women. I have to

922
00:44:05,320 --> 00:44:07,279
Speaker 2: be on a hot stand by. I don't have to be,

923
00:44:07,680 --> 00:44:10,080
Speaker 2: but I like being on a hot stand by for

924
00:44:10,120 --> 00:44:12,440
Speaker 2: the children for whatever they need, whenever they need it

925
00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:17,520
Speaker 2: if I can. Unreal, not spoiler spoiling, but here's someone

926
00:44:17,680 --> 00:44:20,560
Speaker 2: you can Here's someone you can trust and rely on

927
00:44:20,600 --> 00:44:22,319
Speaker 2: that will be there for you when you need that.

928
00:44:22,520 --> 00:44:26,879
Speaker 2: So over that three years, that's restricted me a lot more.

929
00:44:26,920 --> 00:44:30,960
Speaker 2: With say, working in Melbourne where we live, I can't

930
00:44:31,000 --> 00:44:32,799
Speaker 2: do as much travel, and I certainly can't go and

931
00:44:32,800 --> 00:44:34,719
Speaker 2: do say I'd love to do another house husbands or

932
00:44:34,760 --> 00:44:37,280
Speaker 2: something like that, but they're months and months of work,

933
00:44:37,719 --> 00:44:41,080
Speaker 2: and unless it's nearby, that's just not possible because I

934
00:44:41,120 --> 00:44:43,800
Speaker 2: need to be I need to be around for my girls.

935
00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:46,680
Speaker 1: What about the simple thing, like you know, I often

936
00:44:46,719 --> 00:44:52,120
Speaker 1: want about this, but where the guy in the relationship

937
00:44:53,120 --> 00:44:57,680
Speaker 1: is chargeable, the bankcounts all the credit cards, maybe paying

938
00:44:57,680 --> 00:45:02,960
Speaker 1: the bills, and your focus is in your case just

939
00:45:03,000 --> 00:45:05,759
Speaker 1: to earn the quid? Oh yeah, so how do you

940
00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:08,239
Speaker 1: rearrange all that shit?

941
00:45:08,400 --> 00:45:10,640
Speaker 2: Well? Also, plus, I thought I was winning, Mark, I

942
00:45:10,680 --> 00:45:12,440
Speaker 2: thought I was winning because I never had to do

943
00:45:12,600 --> 00:45:17,840
Speaker 2: any financial admin to me, and certainly my brain maths,

944
00:45:18,600 --> 00:45:20,120
Speaker 2: and that's the one thing that makes me feel dumb

945
00:45:20,160 --> 00:45:25,239
Speaker 2: as maths. So the thought of then all I really knew,

946
00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:28,240
Speaker 2: and I know this sounds ridiculous, is how to tap.

947
00:45:28,520 --> 00:45:30,640
Speaker 2: I knew a little bit more a card. You tap

948
00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:32,879
Speaker 2: the card pay for things. If it didn't, you know,

949
00:45:33,080 --> 00:45:35,240
Speaker 2: if there was anything that was a big ticket item

950
00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:38,200
Speaker 2: over one hundred bucks whatever, I would ask for permission,

951
00:45:38,239 --> 00:45:40,880
Speaker 2: which is very funny looking back. I would never not

952
00:45:40,920 --> 00:45:41,960
Speaker 2: get permission.

953
00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:43,479
Speaker 1: Permission to spend your money. Yeah, that you earn.

954
00:45:43,480 --> 00:45:46,400
Speaker 2: Amazing, No, I can hear it outout. I like, what

955
00:45:46,440 --> 00:45:49,719
Speaker 2: do you do? But I also think you you make

956
00:45:49,840 --> 00:45:52,640
Speaker 2: a match over many years, don't you where You're like, Okay,

957
00:45:52,640 --> 00:45:55,240
Speaker 2: well I don't want to be the one to spend

958
00:45:55,280 --> 00:45:57,600
Speaker 2: the month's money, so I'll ask if we got that

959
00:45:57,600 --> 00:45:59,160
Speaker 2: money in the account this week, can I do that

960
00:45:59,200 --> 00:46:01,759
Speaker 2: this week? So that's the sort of permission that I sought.

961
00:46:01,840 --> 00:46:06,320
Speaker 2: It's not like I wouldn't use the words like financial

962
00:46:06,360 --> 00:46:10,640
Speaker 2: coercive control. I don't think that was necessary.

963
00:46:10,760 --> 00:46:13,640
Speaker 1: Part of it was your own willingness to go down that.

964
00:46:13,680 --> 00:46:17,680
Speaker 2: Resonantly, and so therefore was I manipulated not to listen

965
00:46:17,719 --> 00:46:19,399
Speaker 2: to it, like I don't I'll trying to still work

966
00:46:19,440 --> 00:46:21,799
Speaker 2: all of that out in my mind. But to then

967
00:46:21,840 --> 00:46:25,760
Speaker 2: have to take over the whole thing, which seemed so impossible, daunting,

968
00:46:26,120 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 2: but so I had. Luckily, I did have a fantastic

969
00:46:29,239 --> 00:46:31,239
Speaker 2: divorce lawyer who then put me in touch. I was

970
00:46:31,280 --> 00:46:33,680
Speaker 2: with the Commonwealth Bank at the time and still am,

971
00:46:34,320 --> 00:46:39,200
Speaker 2: and combank put somebody with me who then said, listen

972
00:46:39,239 --> 00:46:41,200
Speaker 2: to this. They said, how good is this?

973
00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:41,600
Speaker 1: They?

974
00:46:41,719 --> 00:46:44,320
Speaker 2: I mean, I think this might have been one person's initiative.

975
00:46:44,360 --> 00:46:45,680
Speaker 2: I don't know if this is what the bank do,

976
00:46:45,840 --> 00:46:46,279
Speaker 2: but this.

977
00:46:46,239 --> 00:46:48,000
Speaker 1: Is what this comb is pretty good with this stuff.

978
00:46:48,040 --> 00:46:49,320
Speaker 2: So this woman came.

979
00:46:49,719 --> 00:46:51,680
Speaker 1: To the lawyer's office, the banker.

980
00:46:51,800 --> 00:46:54,400
Speaker 2: The banker, Yeah, the bank woman. She put all of

981
00:46:54,400 --> 00:46:56,320
Speaker 2: the apps, which I know to a lot of people

982
00:46:56,360 --> 00:46:58,000
Speaker 2: sound like I'm a moron and I can put it.

983
00:46:58,000 --> 00:46:59,560
Speaker 2: I can put an app on my phone, but it's

984
00:46:59,680 --> 00:47:02,239
Speaker 2: like that, you know, and the number doesn't work, and

985
00:47:02,239 --> 00:47:05,400
Speaker 2: then the number doesn't. So she just came quietly and

986
00:47:05,440 --> 00:47:07,960
Speaker 2: put all of my banking on all of my devices,

987
00:47:08,160 --> 00:47:11,040
Speaker 2: showed me how it looks, showed me how to use it,

988
00:47:11,080 --> 00:47:14,920
Speaker 2: showed me all of that, and then they were they

989
00:47:14,960 --> 00:47:17,839
Speaker 2: looked into maybe changing my mortgage at the time, which

990
00:47:17,880 --> 00:47:22,200
Speaker 2: they then helped me with. So they definitely took a

991
00:47:22,280 --> 00:47:26,600
Speaker 2: woman who didn't know I'm trying to drag out like

992
00:47:27,320 --> 00:47:31,120
Speaker 2: year twelve maths or you know, maths in society for me.

993
00:47:32,080 --> 00:47:36,120
Speaker 2: So yeah, having to learn from the beginning, everything felt urgent.

994
00:47:36,200 --> 00:47:38,279
Speaker 2: For the last first twelve months, everything I was like,

995
00:47:38,280 --> 00:47:39,800
Speaker 2: oh my god, my god, the money's going to go.

996
00:47:39,680 --> 00:47:42,160
Speaker 2: That's going to go. Don't let that bank account. I

997
00:47:42,200 --> 00:47:44,200
Speaker 2: need half of that. That's a bank account we had,

998
00:47:44,280 --> 00:47:46,239
Speaker 2: and that signs off. I won't get that money, and

999
00:47:46,239 --> 00:47:50,400
Speaker 2: that money will go. And all of this overegged stress

1000
00:47:51,239 --> 00:47:55,080
Speaker 2: to try and work out how do you pay the mortgage? Like,

1001
00:47:55,160 --> 00:47:58,560
Speaker 2: how do you do a budget? I kind of remember,

1002
00:47:58,560 --> 00:48:00,440
Speaker 2: but I haven't had to do that in a long time,

1003
00:48:01,160 --> 00:48:04,200
Speaker 2: So to start again, Oh my god, I took a

1004
00:48:04,200 --> 00:48:06,359
Speaker 2: few tears, took a bit of application, and it took

1005
00:48:06,400 --> 00:48:09,560
Speaker 2: a lot of help from a pretty strong team of

1006
00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:11,560
Speaker 2: women around me who were like, that's all right, let's

1007
00:48:11,560 --> 00:48:13,239
Speaker 2: help you with this. Let's get you across this.

1008
00:48:13,360 --> 00:48:13,640
Speaker 3: Now.

1009
00:48:14,160 --> 00:48:16,640
Speaker 2: It seemed like I had to go and get a car,

1010
00:48:17,360 --> 00:48:20,120
Speaker 2: so the lawyer sent her dad with me. Oh my god.

1011
00:48:20,160 --> 00:48:21,960
Speaker 2: It was the best because my dad had not long

1012
00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:24,640
Speaker 2: gone to use God. So there's a You know, it's

1013
00:48:24,680 --> 00:48:28,120
Speaker 2: funny when you ask for help from the people that

1014
00:48:28,200 --> 00:48:32,239
Speaker 2: you trust. There's certainly a lot of help around. If

1015
00:48:32,280 --> 00:48:35,160
Speaker 2: you can wrap your brain around not feeling embarrassed about

1016
00:48:35,200 --> 00:48:36,839
Speaker 2: not knowing about that stuff. I think that's a big

1017
00:48:36,920 --> 00:48:39,640
Speaker 2: hurdle as wells Like, I'm so, what sort of a

1018
00:48:39,680 --> 00:48:44,280
Speaker 2: stupid person doesn't know about their banking. But I also

1019
00:48:44,360 --> 00:48:47,279
Speaker 2: speak to loads and loads of people about the dual

1020
00:48:47,320 --> 00:48:50,840
Speaker 2: bank accounts and how difficult they are then to separate.

1021
00:48:52,239 --> 00:48:54,720
Speaker 2: You know, you definitely need your own little bank account

1022
00:48:55,640 --> 00:48:57,520
Speaker 2: just to have some things where you don't have to

1023
00:48:58,360 --> 00:49:00,200
Speaker 2: doesn't have to be shown what you've got. You want

1024
00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:01,360
Speaker 2: a little pair of shoes that you didn't want to

1025
00:49:01,400 --> 00:49:03,600
Speaker 2: have to say anything. I don't even know what I'm

1026
00:49:03,640 --> 00:49:06,439
Speaker 2: talking about, but I think, yeah, I think dual bank

1027
00:49:06,480 --> 00:49:08,239
Speaker 2: accounts are, but.

1028
00:49:08,160 --> 00:49:09,360
Speaker 1: I don't think this should be set up in the

1029
00:49:09,400 --> 00:49:09,880
Speaker 1: first place.

1030
00:49:10,040 --> 00:49:13,200
Speaker 2: No, I agree that like the one you both pay

1031
00:49:13,320 --> 00:49:16,200
Speaker 2: into maybe to go here's our rent, here's the electrics.

1032
00:49:16,320 --> 00:49:17,240
Speaker 2: Is that Dad?

1033
00:49:17,719 --> 00:49:18,080
Speaker 1: Just for that?

1034
00:49:18,080 --> 00:49:21,200
Speaker 2: That's certainly not all wages going into I mean, what

1035
00:49:21,360 --> 00:49:25,240
Speaker 2: my wages going into a dual account that I actually

1036
00:49:25,360 --> 00:49:28,239
Speaker 2: when the world turned and we separated, I did not

1037
00:49:28,280 --> 00:49:30,880
Speaker 2: have access to Not only was I not number one

1038
00:49:30,960 --> 00:49:34,680
Speaker 2: on the thing on the chit list, I couldn't get

1039
00:49:34,719 --> 00:49:36,359
Speaker 2: into it. I'm having to ring the bank just going

1040
00:49:36,800 --> 00:49:39,480
Speaker 2: like are we even joking here? Like I'm earning the money.

1041
00:49:39,840 --> 00:49:42,000
Speaker 2: I know I'm not the number one bank holder, but

1042
00:49:42,040 --> 00:49:43,040
Speaker 2: why can I get it?

1043
00:49:43,120 --> 00:49:45,040
Speaker 1: Well, what happened? They did? They say, well, you better

1044
00:49:45,080 --> 00:49:48,120
Speaker 1: come in and get become a signatory or sort of.

1045
00:49:48,200 --> 00:49:52,640
Speaker 2: I'm still number two, still number two. I think it

1046
00:49:52,719 --> 00:49:56,759
Speaker 2: might have been Westpac actually anyway, So yeah, I had

1047
00:49:56,800 --> 00:49:59,520
Speaker 2: to just I had to accept some things that I

1048
00:49:59,560 --> 00:50:01,160
Speaker 2: wasn't going to be able to get back, and I

1049
00:50:01,200 --> 00:50:04,279
Speaker 2: had to just put some new financial things in place

1050
00:50:04,320 --> 00:50:06,440
Speaker 2: and learn it from the ground up. So I'm like,

1051
00:50:06,480 --> 00:50:11,279
Speaker 2: whatever has whatever has transpired before this moment has done

1052
00:50:11,320 --> 00:50:12,719
Speaker 2: whatever it's going to do. Do you know what I mean?

1053
00:50:12,960 --> 00:50:17,120
Speaker 2: Whatever is we spent or wasted or whatever. Great? Now

1054
00:50:17,200 --> 00:50:19,400
Speaker 2: moving forward, what do I do? Because all of a

1055
00:50:19,480 --> 00:50:21,879
Speaker 2: sudden I had this, you know, I took a loan

1056
00:50:21,920 --> 00:50:25,560
Speaker 2: out for the house, and I've been you know, all

1057
00:50:25,600 --> 00:50:29,360
Speaker 2: those interest rates. Oh my god, it was like it

1058
00:50:29,440 --> 00:50:32,360
Speaker 2: doubled it double what I was paying. It was everything

1059
00:50:32,360 --> 00:50:35,960
Speaker 2: at once. So talk about a baptism by financial fire.

1060
00:50:36,280 --> 00:50:41,560
Speaker 2: But now I'm definitely I'm at a place where I

1061
00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:44,960
Speaker 2: am definitely starting to rebuild my retirement future, which is

1062
00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:46,920
Speaker 2: something that you had said to all of us in

1063
00:50:47,000 --> 00:50:48,960
Speaker 2: series one of the Apprentices, where You're like, the storm

1064
00:50:49,000 --> 00:50:52,560
Speaker 2: is coming, you need to work out how on earth

1065
00:50:52,600 --> 00:50:53,560
Speaker 2: you're going to feed yourself.

1066
00:50:53,600 --> 00:50:55,799
Speaker 1: I remember saying to all of you that you need

1067
00:50:55,840 --> 00:50:58,240
Speaker 1: a million dollars on the day you retire.

1068
00:50:58,480 --> 00:51:00,239
Speaker 2: I know it's been in my mind. A Lily actually

1069
00:51:00,280 --> 00:51:03,560
Speaker 2: had a discussion about again outside the house totally, and

1070
00:51:03,600 --> 00:51:06,280
Speaker 2: then that million will give you the wage.

1071
00:51:05,880 --> 00:51:10,520
Speaker 1: To live based on what igistrates were, or or based

1072
00:51:10,520 --> 00:51:12,880
Speaker 1: on what returns you get from million dollars invested. If

1073
00:51:12,880 --> 00:51:16,040
Speaker 1: you buy shares and CBA, that's the amount of money

1074
00:51:16,040 --> 00:51:18,200
Speaker 1: that you're going to have to live off. But that

1075
00:51:18,320 --> 00:51:20,200
Speaker 1: was a minimum million dollars, So how do you do?

1076
00:51:20,280 --> 00:51:21,440
Speaker 1: How do you manage that stuff? Now?

1077
00:51:21,480 --> 00:51:23,640
Speaker 2: So now I've been like I've been like a mate.

1078
00:51:24,280 --> 00:51:26,319
Speaker 2: I sort of got myself in a position where I

1079
00:51:26,400 --> 00:51:29,839
Speaker 2: do like the when the tax returns come in, I've

1080
00:51:29,840 --> 00:51:32,959
Speaker 2: had to do a tax slow roll out to pay

1081
00:51:32,960 --> 00:51:35,719
Speaker 2: that because at the same time, there was another year

1082
00:51:35,719 --> 00:51:37,440
Speaker 2: that I couldn't get all the access to some of

1083
00:51:37,480 --> 00:51:40,600
Speaker 2: the files good times, so that went in late and

1084
00:51:40,680 --> 00:51:45,400
Speaker 2: that needed its own payout then everything, you know, the

1085
00:51:45,400 --> 00:51:48,560
Speaker 2: big payout of the divorce. So I kind of had

1086
00:51:48,600 --> 00:51:52,840
Speaker 2: to start myself on a pay it out gentle track.

1087
00:51:52,960 --> 00:51:54,799
Speaker 1: And I've like installments.

1088
00:51:54,880 --> 00:51:56,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I had I had a meeting yesterday with

1089
00:51:56,800 --> 00:52:01,719
Speaker 2: the accountant who who I'm in. I'm in, Okay, I

1090
00:52:01,840 --> 00:52:04,200
Speaker 2: may retire with a biscuit or two biscuits. So this

1091
00:52:04,320 --> 00:52:07,640
Speaker 2: is exciting. But I've also think the house from when

1092
00:52:07,680 --> 00:52:10,359
Speaker 2: I bought the house to now, the house has more

1093
00:52:10,360 --> 00:52:14,360
Speaker 2: than doubled in value, but the mortgage is still the

1094
00:52:14,400 --> 00:52:16,840
Speaker 2: original mortgage, so it'll all be paid off in the

1095
00:52:16,920 --> 00:52:18,640
Speaker 2: universe whenever that moment happens.

1096
00:52:18,640 --> 00:52:19,359
Speaker 1: So that's good.

1097
00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:22,840
Speaker 2: I know, like my house will be covered when that

1098
00:52:22,920 --> 00:52:27,200
Speaker 2: time comes, if that's to retirement and downsize or whatever

1099
00:52:27,239 --> 00:52:29,280
Speaker 2: that is. So I feel like that little nest egg's

1100
00:52:29,320 --> 00:52:35,480
Speaker 2: doing its thing. But I mean, no nest egg, just

1101
00:52:35,520 --> 00:52:40,400
Speaker 2: trying to save and yeah, trying to invest in our future.

1102
00:52:40,440 --> 00:52:41,640
Speaker 2: So we have one.

1103
00:52:41,719 --> 00:52:45,239
Speaker 1: So when you wake up in the morning and you say,

1104
00:52:45,560 --> 00:52:48,040
Speaker 1: and I've got all the structures are all set up. Now,

1105
00:52:48,040 --> 00:52:50,760
Speaker 1: I've got access CBAS looked after me. I can access

1106
00:52:50,800 --> 00:52:52,400
Speaker 1: the apps. I can see how much is in the account.

1107
00:52:52,600 --> 00:52:54,319
Speaker 1: I can see what I spent the money on. I've

1108
00:52:54,320 --> 00:52:55,880
Speaker 1: got a good account and the accounts making sure I

1109
00:52:55,880 --> 00:52:57,720
Speaker 1: get up to date with my TEX returns. I'm slowly

1110
00:52:57,760 --> 00:53:00,160
Speaker 1: but surely doing all my installments with the ATL make

1111
00:53:00,200 --> 00:53:02,919
Speaker 1: sure I'm in good shape. I've got a better sense

1112
00:53:02,960 --> 00:53:06,000
Speaker 1: of what I'm doing in my financial life, and I

1113
00:53:06,120 --> 00:53:09,520
Speaker 1: understand it much better than now. But it all a

1114
00:53:09,520 --> 00:53:13,520
Speaker 1: lot of it's dependent upon Julia being able to continue

1115
00:53:13,560 --> 00:53:18,920
Speaker 1: to work consistency. What what I mean, You've nailed the show.

1116
00:53:19,880 --> 00:53:24,000
Speaker 1: But do you ever sort of think yourself ship, like

1117
00:53:25,120 --> 00:53:27,640
Speaker 1: what about if they say, you know, Julie, you're too

1118
00:53:27,680 --> 00:53:30,000
Speaker 1: old or what is over you?

1119
00:53:30,239 --> 00:53:33,080
Speaker 2: Every year? Every year I think we're going to get

1120
00:53:33,080 --> 00:53:36,600
Speaker 2: another jungle because the jungle essentially looks after my ear

1121
00:53:37,040 --> 00:53:39,160
Speaker 2: and then everything else I do then helps all again

1122
00:53:39,200 --> 00:53:40,080
Speaker 2: the other stuff in place.

1123
00:53:40,760 --> 00:53:44,239
Speaker 1: So the jungle is you're, you know, you're let's call

1124
00:53:44,239 --> 00:53:47,319
Speaker 1: it your cash flow, your mortgage payments and kids school

1125
00:53:47,360 --> 00:53:48,200
Speaker 1: fees and.

1126
00:53:48,000 --> 00:53:50,640
Speaker 2: That's my month food table absolutely.

1127
00:53:50,120 --> 00:53:53,520
Speaker 1: So that that's covered. But and the other stuff's extras,

1128
00:53:53,760 --> 00:53:54,840
Speaker 1: and you know, you might be able to put a

1129
00:53:54,880 --> 00:53:57,320
Speaker 1: bit of money to do super towards supers, your retirement

1130
00:53:57,760 --> 00:54:00,840
Speaker 1: holiday and that sort of stuff, but it all is

1131
00:54:00,920 --> 00:54:04,080
Speaker 1: underpinned by the jungle. So do you I mean, because

1132
00:54:04,080 --> 00:54:05,520
Speaker 1: I used to do this when we're on the show,

1133
00:54:05,560 --> 00:54:06,880
Speaker 1: and I didn't need to, but I used to. I

1134
00:54:07,000 --> 00:54:09,480
Speaker 1: used to obsess over the ratings. I used to say shit,

1135
00:54:09,600 --> 00:54:12,880
Speaker 1: and I always look at how many people watched you know,

1136
00:54:12,960 --> 00:54:15,160
Speaker 1: I'd be you know, the show me on tonight, and

1137
00:54:15,160 --> 00:54:17,080
Speaker 1: I'd be looking at two nights down the track, I'll

1138
00:54:17,120 --> 00:54:19,000
Speaker 1: be saying, well, how many people watched it? How is

1139
00:54:19,000 --> 00:54:20,719
Speaker 1: that relative to other shows that were on the same

1140
00:54:20,760 --> 00:54:23,880
Speaker 1: time slot as me, which what did that episode episode

1141
00:54:23,920 --> 00:54:26,359
Speaker 1: do well? Why did that episode do well? I mean

1142
00:54:26,360 --> 00:54:27,480
Speaker 1: in the end, it's just stopped doing it.

1143
00:54:27,480 --> 00:54:29,360
Speaker 2: But we can go to the minute by minutes practically

1144
00:54:29,800 --> 00:54:32,040
Speaker 2: at every single minute of the show. I have no

1145
00:54:32,160 --> 00:54:35,160
Speaker 2: business with the ratings because I do find and like

1146
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:37,880
Speaker 2: with comments on socials and all of that sort of stuff,

1147
00:54:37,960 --> 00:54:39,880
Speaker 2: I put myself in my own bubble when I'm in

1148
00:54:39,920 --> 00:54:42,480
Speaker 2: the jungle, and I don't because if someone's like this

1149
00:54:42,600 --> 00:54:45,759
Speaker 2: chick's this chick's an idiot and like not funny and

1150
00:54:45,880 --> 00:54:49,200
Speaker 2: fucked and old and whatever, then by the time I

1151
00:54:49,239 --> 00:54:51,120
Speaker 2: get onto camera tomorrow, I'm kind of like, oh, yeah,

1152
00:54:51,239 --> 00:54:53,600
Speaker 2: the fucking chicks. I'll watch me roll over the desk like,

1153
00:54:53,800 --> 00:54:56,279
Speaker 2: you know whatever. I don't want to I don't want

1154
00:54:56,320 --> 00:54:59,439
Speaker 2: to be is it the tail wag in the dog?

1155
00:54:59,600 --> 00:55:00,319
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1156
00:55:00,360 --> 00:55:05,040
Speaker 2: So ratings, everyone's like our first opening night, everyone was

1157
00:55:05,080 --> 00:55:07,960
Speaker 2: super excited about the ratings. I'm like, I don't want

1158
00:55:07,960 --> 00:55:10,400
Speaker 2: to know. I can't know because I don't want to

1159
00:55:10,440 --> 00:55:13,960
Speaker 2: be confident that it's gone. Let's just see where we

1160
00:55:14,000 --> 00:55:17,439
Speaker 2: are by the end of the show before I show

1161
00:55:17,480 --> 00:55:20,880
Speaker 2: by super excitement about ratings because I think there's enough

1162
00:55:20,960 --> 00:55:22,960
Speaker 2: to stay in a comedy head space. It's quite a

1163
00:55:23,000 --> 00:55:26,080
Speaker 2: difficult space to maintain from arriving at work at four

1164
00:55:26,120 --> 00:55:29,160
Speaker 2: thirty in the morning until the show is spat out

1165
00:55:29,400 --> 00:55:31,400
Speaker 2: by four thirty in the afternoon. That's having done a

1166
00:55:31,400 --> 00:55:31,839
Speaker 2: live show.

1167
00:55:31,920 --> 00:55:34,799
Speaker 1: How many how many shows? How many episodes do you

1168
00:55:34,800 --> 00:55:35,200
Speaker 1: guys do?

1169
00:55:37,000 --> 00:55:38,680
Speaker 2: Some years? Twenty five some years? Third?

1170
00:55:38,960 --> 00:55:39,240
Speaker 1: Really?

1171
00:55:39,560 --> 00:55:40,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, short nights a.

1172
00:55:40,719 --> 00:55:44,120
Speaker 1: Week, so you so you'll be recording while sure whilst's

1173
00:55:44,160 --> 00:55:46,879
Speaker 1: on TV. Yes, you get DoD because what we see

1174
00:55:46,960 --> 00:55:49,239
Speaker 1: is we'd ever get everything dunes in the can. That's it.

1175
00:55:49,480 --> 00:55:51,600
Speaker 2: So you get what the celebrities are doing within the

1176
00:55:51,680 --> 00:55:53,440
Speaker 2: jungle that's in the can because you had to sort

1177
00:55:53,440 --> 00:55:56,000
Speaker 2: of pull together a story of whatever they've been talking about.

1178
00:55:56,080 --> 00:55:58,400
Speaker 2: But when you see Robert and I, we are live,

1179
00:55:58,520 --> 00:56:00,480
Speaker 2: so it's ten thirty in the morning in South Africa,

1180
00:56:01,280 --> 00:56:03,400
Speaker 2: and that's when you really have to be on your game. Hello,

1181
00:56:03,440 --> 00:56:05,840
Speaker 2: Happy Christmas via avance because you do not want to swear.

1182
00:56:06,560 --> 00:56:09,520
Speaker 2: You don't want to be like an accidental whatever I like,

1183
00:56:09,680 --> 00:56:13,440
Speaker 2: but you know, using the wrong word or using the urger.

1184
00:56:13,640 --> 00:56:18,160
Speaker 2: Plus the forever changing landscape of you know, jokes that

1185
00:56:18,280 --> 00:56:20,040
Speaker 2: might have felt like a joke, aren't very funny to

1186
00:56:20,040 --> 00:56:23,200
Speaker 2: someone else anymore, you know, keeping all of that in

1187
00:56:23,239 --> 00:56:27,560
Speaker 2: your mind. Yeah, so the life to air is very intense,

1188
00:56:27,600 --> 00:56:30,760
Speaker 2: but certainly having that job done and dusted is amazing.

1189
00:56:30,840 --> 00:56:34,839
Speaker 2: But income streams are the only secret to television. There's

1190
00:56:34,920 --> 00:56:37,160
Speaker 2: not one. Even though we talk about the jungle being

1191
00:56:37,160 --> 00:56:42,120
Speaker 2: that thing, that one wage that helps. I'm literally in

1192
00:56:42,120 --> 00:56:44,040
Speaker 2: the middle. I was starting to rebuild other parts of

1193
00:56:44,040 --> 00:56:46,759
Speaker 2: the business because I think if the television falls over

1194
00:56:46,840 --> 00:56:50,560
Speaker 2: for me, then what the fuck do we do now?

1195
00:56:50,840 --> 00:56:52,880
Speaker 2: So I want to have more corporates up and running

1196
00:56:52,920 --> 00:56:55,000
Speaker 2: by then. I want to be able to duck in

1197
00:56:55,080 --> 00:56:57,719
Speaker 2: as a guest to different things. And yeah, just.

1198
00:56:58,000 --> 00:57:00,960
Speaker 1: Telling me about the corporate things. So for example, let's

1199
00:57:01,000 --> 00:57:05,400
Speaker 1: say it's CBAT C CBO has got its annual awards

1200
00:57:05,480 --> 00:57:07,799
Speaker 1: night whatever, which I guess they do have this. I'm

1201
00:57:07,840 --> 00:57:10,279
Speaker 1: a guy, Yeah, so what you do? Will you do

1202
00:57:10,320 --> 00:57:13,279
Speaker 1: it a bit? Are you doing a comedy actor? What

1203
00:57:13,280 --> 00:57:14,439
Speaker 1: are you talking about?

1204
00:57:14,880 --> 00:57:16,520
Speaker 2: Do I like stand up at corporate events because I

1205
00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:18,600
Speaker 2: figure you've got so many different tastes in the room

1206
00:57:18,640 --> 00:57:21,640
Speaker 2: you are going to offend someone for sure. So it's

1207
00:57:22,160 --> 00:57:24,480
Speaker 2: a corporate comedy, is not my favorite at all, but

1208
00:57:24,600 --> 00:57:28,320
Speaker 2: I a of hosting those award nights.

1209
00:57:28,440 --> 00:57:29,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you're you're the host.

1210
00:57:30,480 --> 00:57:31,640
Speaker 2: It's so easy for me.

1211
00:57:31,840 --> 00:57:32,560
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1212
00:57:32,560 --> 00:57:39,440
Speaker 2: Plus with the base of formality, it's crazy. So I

1213
00:57:39,600 --> 00:57:42,200
Speaker 2: like that that. I definitely am quite a sensible woman,

1214
00:57:42,280 --> 00:57:46,320
Speaker 2: probably deep down, but I'm you know, get down on

1215
00:57:46,400 --> 00:57:48,560
Speaker 2: it and giggling with the CEO and mucking around so

1216
00:57:48,600 --> 00:57:51,520
Speaker 2: that people have this lovely fun. I didn't think they

1217
00:57:51,520 --> 00:57:54,760
Speaker 2: were going to be like that tonight night, and so yeah, corporates,

1218
00:57:54,760 --> 00:57:55,720
Speaker 2: I really enjoyed.

1219
00:57:55,520 --> 00:57:57,720
Speaker 1: It, just sort of moderating the evening forum but with

1220
00:57:57,800 --> 00:57:58,200
Speaker 1: some fun.

1221
00:57:58,400 --> 00:58:01,360
Speaker 2: Literally just MC mucking around who doesn't have the same

1222
00:58:01,400 --> 00:58:04,720
Speaker 2: gravitas as their business but is happy to you know,

1223
00:58:04,800 --> 00:58:07,400
Speaker 2: as soon as they mentioned, you know, sort of packaging

1224
00:58:07,440 --> 00:58:08,360
Speaker 2: sizes or whatever.

1225
00:58:08,400 --> 00:58:10,480
Speaker 1: I'm you know, but is that a new thing because

1226
00:58:10,520 --> 00:58:13,360
Speaker 1: they you know, ordinarily I would have expected someone be

1227
00:58:13,400 --> 00:58:15,480
Speaker 1: hiring you as the main event. You're going to get

1228
00:58:15,560 --> 00:58:18,200
Speaker 1: up there, and which, by the way of those corporate vices,

1229
00:58:18,240 --> 00:58:18,800
Speaker 1: really hard to do.

1230
00:58:20,240 --> 00:58:23,480
Speaker 2: I mean, I love watching Tom Gleason's amazing at it.

1231
00:58:24,080 --> 00:58:25,440
Speaker 1: Those corporates, not many.

1232
00:58:25,400 --> 00:58:29,959
Speaker 2: Not many love because you know, it's very to lose

1233
00:58:29,960 --> 00:58:32,919
Speaker 2: the line exactly in a corporate room where you're like, hey,

1234
00:58:33,480 --> 00:58:38,880
Speaker 2: do what I love teds. Yeah, well, it's very difficult

1235
00:58:39,160 --> 00:58:41,120
Speaker 2: to step in the wrong place. At least if I'm

1236
00:58:41,160 --> 00:58:43,360
Speaker 2: doing a stand up tour or doing one of the

1237
00:58:43,400 --> 00:58:44,760
Speaker 2: comedy venues people are coming.

1238
00:58:44,800 --> 00:58:45,200
Speaker 1: That's different.

1239
00:58:45,200 --> 00:58:46,960
Speaker 2: They're going to choose to come and see me, and

1240
00:58:47,000 --> 00:58:48,479
Speaker 2: that's great.

1241
00:58:47,680 --> 00:58:49,360
Speaker 1: Want they know you deal.

1242
00:58:49,360 --> 00:58:52,439
Speaker 2: Totally, They're already in it. But yeah, so I would

1243
00:58:52,520 --> 00:58:55,720
Speaker 2: much rather host the night and be there all night.

1244
00:58:55,720 --> 00:58:56,520
Speaker 1: And do you have an agent?

1245
00:58:56,840 --> 00:58:57,040
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1246
00:58:58,080 --> 00:59:00,960
Speaker 2: Who just tell us my agent some Gibilee Street. It's

1247
00:59:01,000 --> 00:59:02,520
Speaker 2: a fantastic woman named.

1248
00:59:02,320 --> 00:59:07,840
Speaker 1: Beck Gubilee Street. Yeah, my dad's father's and his brother's

1249
00:59:08,000 --> 00:59:10,400
Speaker 1: very first cafelo cafe in Australia when they first come through.

1250
00:59:10,400 --> 00:59:13,960
Speaker 1: It's called the Jubilee Cafe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was

1251
00:59:14,000 --> 00:59:17,280
Speaker 1: across the road from all the movie theaters and George Street,

1252
00:59:17,280 --> 00:59:20,040
Speaker 1: and my grandfather used to at eleven o'clock in those

1253
00:59:20,080 --> 00:59:21,400
Speaker 1: days when he used to come out in a suit.

1254
00:59:21,960 --> 00:59:23,360
Speaker 1: But what do you do? He used to turn a

1255
00:59:23,400 --> 00:59:25,680
Speaker 1: fan on and get the coffee brewing underneath the fan

1256
00:59:25,760 --> 00:59:27,800
Speaker 1: and the fan was sucking coffee and send out to

1257
00:59:27,880 --> 00:59:30,280
Speaker 1: the street. But the Jubilee is like the Metro. Where

1258
00:59:30,320 --> 00:59:33,440
Speaker 1: was that, Well, he was on the other side of

1259
00:59:33,440 --> 00:59:35,080
Speaker 1: the road to where all the movie theaters are, So

1260
00:59:35,440 --> 00:59:36,720
Speaker 1: in George Street where all.

1261
00:59:36,680 --> 00:59:40,240
Speaker 2: The pictures Metro theaters on the corner there opposite the.

1262
00:59:41,040 --> 00:59:44,560
Speaker 1: Down towards Chinatown. Yeah right, yeah, and uh and it

1263
00:59:44,600 --> 00:59:47,000
Speaker 1: was called Jubilee Cafe. So that's interesting you should say that,

1264
00:59:47,200 --> 00:59:50,440
Speaker 1: so that your your agent is called Jubilee Management. Jubilee

1265
00:59:50,440 --> 00:59:51,760
Speaker 1: what Gibilee Street.

1266
00:59:52,120 --> 00:59:54,280
Speaker 2: I've known that. She and I lived together in London

1267
00:59:54,920 --> 00:59:58,360
Speaker 2: many years ago in the early two thousands vibes and

1268
00:59:58,560 --> 01:00:01,600
Speaker 2: she used would tour. She's been my touring agent for

1269
01:00:01,680 --> 01:00:04,600
Speaker 2: many many years. Then she sold her agency to Live

1270
01:00:04,720 --> 01:00:07,520
Speaker 2: Nation and became a part of the Australian Live Nation

1271
01:00:08,280 --> 01:00:10,919
Speaker 2: and was there for many many years. And then now

1272
01:00:10,960 --> 01:00:15,280
Speaker 2: she's sort of gone to just streamlining into management. So

1273
01:00:15,440 --> 01:00:19,440
Speaker 2: she looks after Ursula Carlson the fantastic and Nazim Hussein

1274
01:00:20,760 --> 01:00:23,800
Speaker 2: the wonderful, great people on the books.

1275
01:00:23,800 --> 01:00:24,480
Speaker 1: She had great books.

1276
01:00:24,520 --> 01:00:31,240
Speaker 2: She's got an NCP A no policy because she just

1277
01:00:31,280 --> 01:00:33,600
Speaker 2: now one's got the time, who's got the time? No

1278
01:00:33,640 --> 01:00:36,080
Speaker 2: one's got the time to deal with knuckles anymore.

1279
01:00:36,160 --> 01:00:38,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, totally. I like that word too. Bit I mean,

1280
01:00:38,280 --> 01:00:40,840
Speaker 1: you know, I had to use it, but like in broadcast.

1281
01:00:40,880 --> 01:00:42,840
Speaker 1: But I mean I actually used it a little while

1282
01:00:42,880 --> 01:00:44,440
Speaker 1: ago recently, and I've got in trouble from it for

1283
01:00:44,520 --> 01:00:44,840
Speaker 1: my game.

1284
01:00:44,880 --> 01:00:48,240
Speaker 2: But I'm never I'm double negative. I'm never not using it.

1285
01:00:48,320 --> 01:00:49,720
Speaker 2: I use it all the time. I'm mad for it.

1286
01:00:49,840 --> 01:00:53,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, or use it but on air, like I

1287
01:00:53,440 --> 01:00:55,479
Speaker 1: got to sponsors, not sort stuff. You know, it works.

1288
01:00:55,760 --> 01:00:59,280
Speaker 1: So you're getting many gigs only there's hosting gigs. Yeah,

1289
01:00:59,320 --> 01:01:01,000
Speaker 1: so you build, I'll.

1290
01:01:00,840 --> 01:01:04,680
Speaker 2: Turn up and down the volume of like within a

1291
01:01:04,720 --> 01:01:07,960
Speaker 2: small price range. If I need more of them, I'll

1292
01:01:08,000 --> 01:01:08,760
Speaker 2: just turn down the field.

1293
01:01:08,920 --> 01:01:09,320
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1294
01:01:09,440 --> 01:01:13,120
Speaker 2: If I'm like, ahh his surge price, perhaps I'm surging

1295
01:01:13,200 --> 01:01:13,800
Speaker 2: right now, You're like.

1296
01:01:13,760 --> 01:01:16,240
Speaker 1: You're like uber, I'm fully uber. Yeah you're surging and

1297
01:01:16,480 --> 01:01:18,480
Speaker 1: I've been there in four minutes. Yeah yeah yeah h

1298
01:01:18,520 --> 01:01:22,240
Speaker 1: surge pricing at all times? Yeah yeah, but is that

1299
01:01:22,320 --> 01:01:27,439
Speaker 1: important me? Yeah, You're you're a responsible your mother who

1300
01:01:27,440 --> 01:01:30,840
Speaker 1: has responsibilities to her kids. You have, probably importantly, but

1301
01:01:30,880 --> 01:01:33,320
Speaker 1: they're going to be okay. You have responsibilities more importantly

1302
01:01:33,320 --> 01:01:36,520
Speaker 1: to yourself. Now just to yourself. Oh yeah, you're going

1303
01:01:36,560 --> 01:01:38,200
Speaker 1: to sort yourself after the rest of your life.

1304
01:01:38,280 --> 01:01:40,240
Speaker 2: Let me tell you. I've just so. My dad spent

1305
01:01:40,320 --> 01:01:42,960
Speaker 2: a year and a half after a fall on his

1306
01:01:43,120 --> 01:01:48,240
Speaker 2: downward essentially dementia trajectory until he went to his God.

1307
01:01:48,600 --> 01:01:51,400
Speaker 2: And let me tell you, it is the most shit

1308
01:01:51,480 --> 01:01:56,640
Speaker 2: punchline to work in this hard through life, Like that's

1309
01:01:56,760 --> 01:01:58,640
Speaker 2: what we end up in like that in a bed.

1310
01:02:00,440 --> 01:02:02,680
Speaker 2: So that was a bit of a when that sounds

1311
01:02:02,720 --> 01:02:06,560
Speaker 2: ridiculous saying that was a wake up call, but I'm like,

1312
01:02:07,000 --> 01:02:10,320
Speaker 2: if dementia's ahead, I'm sure it may be, but if

1313
01:02:10,360 --> 01:02:12,760
Speaker 2: it is, fucking now, I need to get a lot

1314
01:02:12,800 --> 01:02:14,880
Speaker 2: more than just my flight answers in place right now.

1315
01:02:14,920 --> 01:02:19,000
Speaker 2: I need to get some consistency of behaviors some you know,

1316
01:02:19,080 --> 01:02:21,000
Speaker 2: like trying to train the brain a little bit more,

1317
01:02:21,080 --> 01:02:24,680
Speaker 2: keeping it holding on and as strong as possible until

1318
01:02:24,680 --> 01:02:26,800
Speaker 2: it finally lets go. I don't know what's it just

1319
01:02:26,840 --> 01:02:29,160
Speaker 2: feels like everyone I speak to they're like, yeah, my actually,

1320
01:02:29,160 --> 01:02:31,960
Speaker 2: my parent died in a very similar way. It was dementia.

1321
01:02:32,120 --> 01:02:33,120
Speaker 2: They went downhill.

1322
01:02:34,400 --> 01:02:37,560
Speaker 1: Are you funny to hear about dementia much more as

1323
01:02:37,560 --> 01:02:39,240
Speaker 1: we get older or something? I don't know what it is, weird,

1324
01:02:39,400 --> 01:02:41,360
Speaker 1: but I feel like I'm hearing about dementia more and

1325
01:02:41,360 --> 01:02:43,280
Speaker 1: more often, more often. Do you know it's one of

1326
01:02:43,360 --> 01:02:48,800
Speaker 1: those highly searched words for people over sixty, Yeah, right

1327
01:02:49,040 --> 01:02:49,720
Speaker 1: on Google.

1328
01:02:49,760 --> 01:02:52,240
Speaker 2: I wonder if we hear about it more now because elderly,

1329
01:02:52,320 --> 01:02:55,240
Speaker 2: but being elderly is pretty associated with being a bit

1330
01:02:55,280 --> 01:02:57,760
Speaker 2: forgetful and a bit dotter in a bit whatever, right

1331
01:02:57,840 --> 01:03:01,720
Speaker 2: as we sort of age and dementia pulls that up

1332
01:03:01,720 --> 01:03:06,400
Speaker 2: earlier in the piece. But I felt like Dad's dissension

1333
01:03:06,480 --> 01:03:10,040
Speaker 2: into it was like nothing I was. I was. I

1334
01:03:10,080 --> 01:03:14,320
Speaker 2: was in high volume shock sadness for the year and

1335
01:03:14,360 --> 01:03:15,920
Speaker 2: a half because it felt like this is.

1336
01:03:15,880 --> 01:03:18,560
Speaker 1: It's Morris your surname or is it your married name.

1337
01:03:18,600 --> 01:03:20,520
Speaker 2: That's my surname, that's my born name.

1338
01:03:20,600 --> 01:03:26,080
Speaker 1: There because Morris is Irish, Yes, Irish, because my mother

1339
01:03:26,160 --> 01:03:30,080
Speaker 1: has Morris on her side. And do you know that

1340
01:03:33,360 --> 01:03:41,560
Speaker 1: Irish descent people have genetic mutations that sit around things

1341
01:03:41,560 --> 01:03:46,640
Speaker 1: like modern neurone disease and brain disease including dementia. Yeah,

1342
01:03:46,680 --> 01:03:50,280
Speaker 1: and my mother died for neurosease at but at eighty six.

1343
01:03:50,360 --> 01:03:54,440
Speaker 1: But nonetheless I only found this out through another project

1344
01:03:54,480 --> 01:03:58,760
Speaker 1: I'm doing at the moment, and it is a bit

1345
01:03:58,800 --> 01:04:00,920
Speaker 1: of a drama, like you've got to you know, you've

1346
01:04:00,920 --> 01:04:03,480
Speaker 1: got to be really aware of these things. And as

1347
01:04:03,520 --> 01:04:05,720
Speaker 1: much there's no point saying, oh, I'm just going to

1348
01:04:05,720 --> 01:04:07,000
Speaker 1: forget about it. It's not going to happen to me.

1349
01:04:07,320 --> 01:04:08,960
Speaker 1: You've got to be aware of these things, make sure

1350
01:04:08,960 --> 01:04:10,680
Speaker 1: you get the best out of between here and that

1351
01:04:10,760 --> 01:04:12,720
Speaker 1: day if it ever happens. God forivid it doesn't happen

1352
01:04:12,720 --> 01:04:15,920
Speaker 1: to you. But also you've got to say, what are

1353
01:04:15,960 --> 01:04:19,080
Speaker 1: those things I need to be doing to delay anything

1354
01:04:19,120 --> 01:04:20,840
Speaker 1: like that happening to me? And if it does happen

1355
01:04:20,920 --> 01:04:23,640
Speaker 1: to me, how can I make it absolutely?

1356
01:04:23,680 --> 01:04:26,160
Speaker 2: I mean, for me, I think, I think I'm going

1357
01:04:26,160 --> 01:04:28,520
Speaker 2: to go to Switzerland and try and buy the tablet

1358
01:04:29,400 --> 01:04:31,160
Speaker 2: and then I'll come home and if my arms can

1359
01:04:31,160 --> 01:04:34,080
Speaker 2: still lift it to my face, he'll take it. I mean,

1360
01:04:34,760 --> 01:04:39,240
Speaker 2: I feel like my dad knew before that fall because

1361
01:04:39,280 --> 01:04:42,640
Speaker 2: he was he was so Catholic, but I think he

1362
01:04:42,760 --> 01:04:45,280
Speaker 2: wanted it. I think he knew that it was coming.

1363
01:04:45,440 --> 01:04:48,320
Speaker 2: I feel like we had some of those discussions. We

1364
01:04:48,480 --> 01:04:50,520
Speaker 2: definitely had a discussion in hospital where he said, I

1365
01:04:50,520 --> 01:04:53,120
Speaker 2: want to apologize because I feel like moving forward, I'm

1366
01:04:53,120 --> 01:04:55,120
Speaker 2: not going to have control of my thoughts and I

1367
01:04:55,160 --> 01:04:57,720
Speaker 2: don't know what I'm going to be saying to you,

1368
01:04:57,760 --> 01:05:00,320
Speaker 2: but you know, he gave we did our love your

1369
01:05:00,400 --> 01:05:02,240
Speaker 2: chat and you've been an amazing dad and all that.

1370
01:05:02,280 --> 01:05:04,480
Speaker 2: So we had that moment. But he didn't die for

1371
01:05:04,480 --> 01:05:06,920
Speaker 2: another year after that. But my god, it's like the

1372
01:05:06,960 --> 01:05:08,880
Speaker 2: television's watching me. You need to get out of here.

1373
01:05:08,880 --> 01:05:10,120
Speaker 2: They're going to make you stay.

1374
01:05:09,880 --> 01:05:10,439
Speaker 1: In here too.

1375
01:05:10,640 --> 01:05:15,760
Speaker 2: I mean it was, Oh my fg was the most

1376
01:05:15,760 --> 01:05:18,560
Speaker 2: extraordinary thing I've witnessed in my life. I thought the

1377
01:05:18,640 --> 01:05:23,040
Speaker 2: divorce was hardcore a divorce fucking enough to watch you

1378
01:05:23,040 --> 01:05:25,439
Speaker 2: by dad descend into this and like all that work

1379
01:05:25,480 --> 01:05:30,720
Speaker 2: all those years. But I also, inside my own brain

1380
01:05:30,960 --> 01:05:33,080
Speaker 2: wonder if he was undiagnosed.

1381
01:05:33,120 --> 01:05:35,479
Speaker 1: Ay, ahd, it's going to ask you that you yeah,

1382
01:05:35,560 --> 01:05:38,560
Speaker 1: I mean, did he have similar sort of personality?

1383
01:05:39,760 --> 01:05:42,320
Speaker 2: I think in my dad was super complicated, as we

1384
01:05:42,400 --> 01:05:46,720
Speaker 2: all are, but he lacked confidence in the workplace. He'd

1385
01:05:46,720 --> 01:05:51,200
Speaker 2: missed out on he missed out on doing UNI and

1386
01:05:51,240 --> 01:05:56,000
Speaker 2: all that sort of stuff. And highly read man, like

1387
01:05:56,400 --> 01:05:58,960
Speaker 2: very very well read. We went to become a Christian

1388
01:05:58,960 --> 01:06:05,320
Speaker 2: brother and then that didn't really work out in only

1389
01:06:05,360 --> 01:06:08,760
Speaker 2: the way I'm sure you can imagine. And then he

1390
01:06:09,480 --> 01:06:14,360
Speaker 2: met my mum about nine months after leaving yeah, the order,

1391
01:06:14,480 --> 01:06:18,680
Speaker 2: and then they were kind of married in babies within

1392
01:06:18,720 --> 01:06:22,640
Speaker 2: a year. So I don't think he ever, I don't

1393
01:06:22,640 --> 01:06:24,200
Speaker 2: think he ever had a chance to catch up with

1394
01:06:24,240 --> 01:06:26,560
Speaker 2: his own brain. I think that there. I think their

1395
01:06:26,800 --> 01:06:30,040
Speaker 2: age group was definitely like putting on appearances and everything

1396
01:06:30,120 --> 01:06:34,200
Speaker 2: must appear fine, you know, like we wore English handmade

1397
01:06:34,880 --> 01:06:37,840
Speaker 2: school shoes, but both my parents worked like two and

1398
01:06:37,880 --> 01:06:41,040
Speaker 2: three jobs. Why am I in start write school shoes

1399
01:06:41,080 --> 01:06:44,240
Speaker 2: in Gosford? Like, we didn't have the best of everything,

1400
01:06:44,280 --> 01:06:45,680
Speaker 2: but we have the best that we could afford of

1401
01:06:45,760 --> 01:06:48,720
Speaker 2: absolutely everything, and that keeping up appearances must have been

1402
01:06:48,760 --> 01:06:50,880
Speaker 2: a drainer. But I think my dad would have gone

1403
01:06:50,880 --> 01:06:53,600
Speaker 2: through bouts of depression and all sorts of stuff because

1404
01:06:53,800 --> 01:06:56,040
Speaker 2: I think he had ADHD brain. I think his brain

1405
01:06:56,040 --> 01:06:58,880
Speaker 2: would have been like did a littler Yeah.

1406
01:06:58,960 --> 01:07:02,280
Speaker 1: I think my mother was similar. We used to wear

1407
01:07:02,880 --> 01:07:06,960
Speaker 1: velvet nothing, but my mother would spend everything she had

1408
01:07:07,000 --> 01:07:09,560
Speaker 1: on putting us to the best clothes because you've got

1409
01:07:09,600 --> 01:07:13,360
Speaker 1: to look good at Mass. Yeah, especially on Sunday Mass,

1410
01:07:13,760 --> 01:07:15,920
Speaker 1: they have to wear little velt pants and I remember,

1411
01:07:16,000 --> 01:07:18,040
Speaker 1: you know, I used to hate it, but I remember

1412
01:07:18,160 --> 01:07:21,560
Speaker 1: brother sister used to but they were significantly younger than me,

1413
01:07:21,800 --> 01:07:23,680
Speaker 1: and I remember my mum dressing them up exactly the

1414
01:07:23,720 --> 01:07:25,240
Speaker 1: same sort of stuff. And I used to think. I

1415
01:07:25,280 --> 01:07:27,760
Speaker 1: used to think myself at the time, why, I don't know,

1416
01:07:27,760 --> 01:07:29,400
Speaker 1: I just want to go upair of shorts and longs.

1417
01:07:29,600 --> 01:07:31,840
Speaker 1: I would have been happy with that. But and a

1418
01:07:31,840 --> 01:07:33,480
Speaker 1: lot of the other kids did do that. Actually, whether

1419
01:07:33,520 --> 01:07:36,880
Speaker 1: you always wore shoes to church, but mum was obsessed

1420
01:07:36,880 --> 01:07:39,800
Speaker 1: with this sort of stuff, and you know that has

1421
01:07:39,840 --> 01:07:42,960
Speaker 1: a relationship to this Catholic guilt thing. Definitely, you went

1422
01:07:43,000 --> 01:07:46,200
Speaker 1: to CAFA school. I mean, that's a big deal. Yeah,

1423
01:07:46,400 --> 01:07:48,360
Speaker 1: I mean, and that actually probably didn't feed too well

1424
01:07:48,360 --> 01:07:52,200
Speaker 1: into your DHD, your ADHD particularly wanting to please everybody.

1425
01:07:52,240 --> 01:07:55,320
Speaker 2: The nuns were very kind with me, but they also

1426
01:07:55,480 --> 01:07:57,360
Speaker 2: told my parents when I was in year twelve that

1427
01:07:57,400 --> 01:08:00,840
Speaker 2: I had slipped through the system with my person and

1428
01:08:00,960 --> 01:08:02,880
Speaker 2: I got one hundred and ninety eight out of five

1429
01:08:02,960 --> 01:08:07,280
Speaker 2: hundred in the HSC. That certificate is hanging up in

1430
01:08:07,320 --> 01:08:11,360
Speaker 2: my office as I'm as proud as punch of my

1431
01:08:11,520 --> 01:08:14,360
Speaker 2: hundred because I wouldn't have been able to function in

1432
01:08:14,440 --> 01:08:18,320
Speaker 2: the test setup. You I didn't have the brain to take.

1433
01:08:18,360 --> 01:08:21,880
Speaker 1: You probably need to complete the exam. You probably ran

1434
01:08:21,920 --> 01:08:22,240
Speaker 1: out of time.

1435
01:08:22,280 --> 01:08:24,439
Speaker 2: I would have been doing drawings to make the examiners laugh,

1436
01:08:24,439 --> 01:08:26,040
Speaker 2: to think they would give me one or two extra

1437
01:08:26,080 --> 01:08:29,200
Speaker 2: points because I'd done such a nice drawing. Shit like that.

1438
01:08:29,439 --> 01:08:29,839
Speaker 1: Wow.

1439
01:08:30,080 --> 01:08:33,519
Speaker 2: Yeah, so coming out of school, no UNI. That for

1440
01:08:33,800 --> 01:08:36,240
Speaker 2: me back in those days, for everybody, if you didn't

1441
01:08:36,240 --> 01:08:36,479
Speaker 2: go to.

1442
01:08:36,600 --> 01:08:38,040
Speaker 1: UNI, what were you going to do here?

1443
01:08:38,479 --> 01:08:40,479
Speaker 2: What we're we going to do? I went for the

1444
01:08:40,479 --> 01:08:43,000
Speaker 2: police department for a little bit of a while, processing

1445
01:08:43,040 --> 01:08:47,920
Speaker 2: p fours, which are accident reports through a microfilm microfish.

1446
01:08:47,960 --> 01:08:50,760
Speaker 2: I did every Yeah, exactly, I did every job I

1447
01:08:50,760 --> 01:08:53,640
Speaker 2: could moving forward. And I've only just said to my

1448
01:08:53,680 --> 01:08:57,080
Speaker 2: girls recently because they're both kind of around that age

1449
01:08:57,120 --> 01:08:58,800
Speaker 2: where they're trying to work out what it is they'll

1450
01:08:58,840 --> 01:09:01,680
Speaker 2: do in their lives, and I said, look, earn your

1451
01:09:01,680 --> 01:09:05,479
Speaker 2: rent till you're twenty five, do any job, do a job,

1452
01:09:05,720 --> 01:09:08,160
Speaker 2: do a job twenty five. All of a sudden you

1453
01:09:08,200 --> 01:09:10,080
Speaker 2: have a little bit of awakening or around about that

1454
01:09:10,120 --> 01:09:12,040
Speaker 2: time where you're like, actually, I think I would be

1455
01:09:12,080 --> 01:09:14,040
Speaker 2: better suited to their You can go to UNI and

1456
01:09:14,160 --> 01:09:16,479
Speaker 2: do this, do that, or do whatever. You don't rush

1457
01:09:16,800 --> 01:09:20,000
Speaker 2: earn your rent, live your life, be a part of things.

1458
01:09:20,000 --> 01:09:23,040
Speaker 2: So you understand. So then when you make that turn

1459
01:09:24,240 --> 01:09:27,759
Speaker 2: directly into the thing that becomes your passion or your

1460
01:09:27,880 --> 01:09:31,080
Speaker 2: job or you know, then you're ready for it because

1461
01:09:31,120 --> 01:09:33,479
Speaker 2: you've given it. You've had a bit of you've had

1462
01:09:33,520 --> 01:09:35,240
Speaker 2: a bit of get out time, you've had a bit

1463
01:09:35,280 --> 01:09:36,960
Speaker 2: of you know, a couple of trips, a couple of this,

1464
01:09:37,040 --> 01:09:39,080
Speaker 2: and you've you know, learned a little bit about your life.

1465
01:09:39,280 --> 01:09:42,200
Speaker 1: Do sit down and think to yourself, here's the girl

1466
01:09:42,200 --> 01:09:45,000
Speaker 1: looking at microfilm microfishon those days, you know, which is

1467
01:09:45,520 --> 01:09:49,200
Speaker 1: actually a bit of actual black film put through a

1468
01:09:49,200 --> 01:09:52,160
Speaker 1: little machine, used to turn a dial and used to

1469
01:09:52,240 --> 01:09:54,160
Speaker 1: have the information written on the thing and to come

1470
01:09:54,240 --> 01:09:55,559
Speaker 1: up on a screen for it. But do you ever

1471
01:09:55,600 --> 01:09:59,080
Speaker 1: think yourself then and now, especially now, given that you've

1472
01:09:59,280 --> 01:10:03,960
Speaker 1: lived a life undiagnosed, but now you are diagnosed and unmedicated,

1473
01:10:03,960 --> 01:10:07,599
Speaker 1: but now you have access to medication. You've gone through

1474
01:10:07,600 --> 01:10:10,080
Speaker 1: a divorce, you've been on you've done a million different

1475
01:10:10,080 --> 01:10:12,960
Speaker 1: things in your life. You're now completely independent, You're now

1476
01:10:13,200 --> 01:10:16,519
Speaker 1: taken control of all your situation. Do you think yourself, Julia,

1477
01:10:16,640 --> 01:10:19,760
Speaker 1: I'm going to give yourself a patter on the back. Ah.

1478
01:10:19,880 --> 01:10:24,479
Speaker 2: At all times I feel like that, I know, literally

1479
01:10:25,840 --> 01:10:28,080
Speaker 2: I could not be more pleased with myself at the moment.

1480
01:10:28,120 --> 01:10:30,479
Speaker 2: In particular, I've been just sort of thinking exactly about that.

1481
01:10:30,640 --> 01:10:32,519
Speaker 2: Just like you know, I talk about many rivers across.

1482
01:10:32,600 --> 01:10:36,599
Speaker 2: Every single person has got, I think, an extraordinary story,

1483
01:10:37,479 --> 01:10:40,000
Speaker 2: whether there needs have been met emotionally or physically, or

1484
01:10:40,040 --> 01:10:41,440
Speaker 2: financially or whatever.

1485
01:10:41,120 --> 01:10:42,240
Speaker 1: That is, or all of them.

1486
01:10:42,439 --> 01:10:48,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, so my story is no more intense than anybody else's.

1487
01:10:48,240 --> 01:10:51,120
Speaker 2: It's just that I lived my life a lot in

1488
01:10:51,120 --> 01:10:53,599
Speaker 2: front of the general public. They can, you know, they cause.

1489
01:10:53,400 --> 01:10:55,519
Speaker 1: They think they can see everything. Yeah, I mean, but

1490
01:10:55,880 --> 01:10:59,080
Speaker 1: but I think one of the great things about you

1491
01:10:59,240 --> 01:11:06,600
Speaker 1: is you're honest. You know your your propensity to actually

1492
01:11:06,720 --> 01:11:10,080
Speaker 1: maybe even overstate the honesty, I overstate the proposition because

1493
01:11:10,160 --> 01:11:15,320
Speaker 1: a lot of people don't have your forthrowners and with themselves,

1494
01:11:15,360 --> 01:11:17,160
Speaker 1: and they sit there and they just hide all this shit,

1495
01:11:17,600 --> 01:11:20,080
Speaker 1: and then they have to do that nothing to hide.

1496
01:11:20,280 --> 01:11:22,400
Speaker 1: I think that's what it is, nothing to hide. And

1497
01:11:22,439 --> 01:11:23,920
Speaker 1: that's why I was so happy to get you on

1498
01:11:23,920 --> 01:11:25,720
Speaker 1: the show. I mean, I'm not here to everybody. I'm

1499
01:11:25,720 --> 01:11:27,960
Speaker 1: not trying to talk it down subject, but this is

1500
01:11:28,000 --> 01:11:32,000
Speaker 1: actually for me anyway, helplifting that someone like Julia is

1501
01:11:32,200 --> 01:11:35,080
Speaker 1: prepared to sort of say how it is and still

1502
01:11:35,080 --> 01:11:36,040
Speaker 1: happy with her life.

1503
01:11:36,439 --> 01:11:39,160
Speaker 2: I think we do keep up appearances so much or

1504
01:11:39,240 --> 01:11:42,160
Speaker 2: trying to look like everything's fine, we're all fine, everyone's fine,

1505
01:11:42,760 --> 01:11:47,679
Speaker 2: that when you do say, actually, everything's not necessarily fine

1506
01:11:47,680 --> 01:11:51,000
Speaker 2: and this has been difficult. Everybody I know is going

1507
01:11:51,040 --> 01:11:56,200
Speaker 2: through trials and tribulations. Everyone you speak to so kind

1508
01:11:56,200 --> 01:12:00,080
Speaker 2: of I don't know what I'm trying to say, but

1509
01:12:00,200 --> 01:12:01,840
Speaker 2: most of the people that I speak to are all

1510
01:12:01,960 --> 01:12:04,920
Speaker 2: chatting about mental health at the moment. Yeah, good bad,

1511
01:12:05,400 --> 01:12:07,519
Speaker 2: you know, silly, I was going to say, silly Trump,

1512
01:12:07,560 --> 01:12:09,840
Speaker 2: I'll say that. But you know, like there's a lot

1513
01:12:09,880 --> 01:12:12,519
Speaker 2: going on in our world. Do you how do you

1514
01:12:12,600 --> 01:12:16,679
Speaker 2: stay still feeling vaguely okay without it all all feel

1515
01:12:16,720 --> 01:12:19,040
Speaker 2: like it's coming in on you? And I think I

1516
01:12:19,040 --> 01:12:22,640
Speaker 2: think for me that's taking some time at home in

1517
01:12:22,680 --> 01:12:24,040
Speaker 2: the stillness with my family.

1518
01:12:25,320 --> 01:12:28,599
Speaker 1: I think that's been resolved. Yeah, doesn't mean no more

1519
01:12:28,600 --> 01:12:30,800
Speaker 1: shit's going to happen, No, stand by for the next

1520
01:12:30,800 --> 01:12:33,479
Speaker 1: bit right now. Resolve though that's a relative to whatever

1521
01:12:33,520 --> 01:12:33,880
Speaker 1: has happened.

1522
01:12:33,880 --> 01:12:36,800
Speaker 2: Plus, remember to notice when the good stuff happens. I

1523
01:12:36,800 --> 01:12:38,479
Speaker 2: think the bad stuff's so easy to go all the

1524
01:12:38,560 --> 01:12:41,320
Speaker 2: bloody car's done this, and now the house and that's stupid.

1525
01:12:41,320 --> 01:12:46,439
Speaker 2: How the roofs rotten and whatever that is. But such

1526
01:12:46,479 --> 01:12:48,080
Speaker 2: and such arrived today and I didn't have to go

1527
01:12:48,120 --> 01:12:50,559
Speaker 2: and do that or you know, it's remembering to notice

1528
01:12:50,600 --> 01:12:53,040
Speaker 2: the glimmers is what everybody's calling them, not just the

1529
01:12:53,040 --> 01:12:55,960
Speaker 2: downside of this happened, and that happened, and oh my god,

1530
01:12:56,280 --> 01:12:57,960
Speaker 2: the victim game. Where's the good stuff?

1531
01:12:58,240 --> 01:12:58,639
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1532
01:12:58,760 --> 01:13:00,719
Speaker 2: Do you know what alarm? When I off this morning

1533
01:13:01,000 --> 01:13:03,720
Speaker 2: and I'd forgotten to plug the charger in still went

1534
01:13:03,760 --> 01:13:04,120
Speaker 2: off though.

1535
01:13:04,160 --> 01:13:04,439
Speaker 1: Great.

1536
01:13:04,600 --> 01:13:07,000
Speaker 2: So there's you know, trying to notice those little good

1537
01:13:07,040 --> 01:13:10,559
Speaker 2: things in your day. Keep me afloat a little bit

1538
01:13:10,560 --> 01:13:10,840
Speaker 2: more too.

1539
01:13:10,920 --> 01:13:13,439
Speaker 1: It's funnys she was there because you know, from me

1540
01:13:13,439 --> 01:13:16,599
Speaker 1: it is really simple. I often get out of bed

1541
01:13:16,680 --> 01:13:18,240
Speaker 1: in the morning, like you know, get it out pretty early.

1542
01:13:18,520 --> 01:13:21,040
Speaker 1: And but I actually and if I had to shit sleep,

1543
01:13:22,080 --> 01:13:25,080
Speaker 1: I actually say to myself, you got out of bed, Yeah,

1544
01:13:25,160 --> 01:13:27,160
Speaker 1: you're all right, I got made to dead. I've got

1545
01:13:27,160 --> 01:13:29,360
Speaker 1: a lot of friends who or can't get out of

1546
01:13:29,360 --> 01:13:33,760
Speaker 1: bed there they're stuffed. And you know, like I'm sort

1547
01:13:33,760 --> 01:13:36,880
Speaker 1: of coming up to that that that the next cliff,

1548
01:13:37,360 --> 01:13:40,599
Speaker 1: and and I think I actually think how lucky I am.

1549
01:13:40,720 --> 01:13:42,880
Speaker 1: I mean, and so gratefulness is a big deal. I mean,

1550
01:13:42,920 --> 01:13:46,040
Speaker 1: by the way, very Catholic. Yeah, of course it would

1551
01:13:46,040 --> 01:13:49,480
Speaker 1: be grateful, but it doesn't matter. It works, It works absolutely.

1552
01:13:49,040 --> 01:13:51,040
Speaker 2: And there is it like there is. Somebody said to

1553
01:13:51,040 --> 01:13:54,799
Speaker 2: me not long ago, I've definitely started to not argue

1554
01:13:54,920 --> 01:13:57,559
Speaker 2: but stand my ground back. I never used to do that.

1555
01:13:57,600 --> 01:13:59,439
Speaker 2: I just think I'll let this whatever, stupid people of

1556
01:13:59,439 --> 01:14:00,960
Speaker 2: person say this stupid thing, and then they can just

1557
01:14:01,040 --> 01:14:02,920
Speaker 2: roll on and I'm not going to have my correspondence.

1558
01:14:03,680 --> 01:14:06,519
Speaker 2: But these days I will have a word back or

1559
01:14:06,520 --> 01:14:08,960
Speaker 2: I'm like that's not actually correct. So there was something

1560
01:14:09,000 --> 01:14:10,519
Speaker 2: that happened I can't remember a few weeks ago when

1561
01:14:10,560 --> 01:14:12,600
Speaker 2: I was working and whatever. It was the sort of

1562
01:14:12,600 --> 01:14:15,200
Speaker 2: a gas lighting moment where they were like, oh, you

1563
01:14:15,280 --> 01:14:17,840
Speaker 2: better not turn when such and such happens, and I

1564
01:14:17,880 --> 01:14:20,599
Speaker 2: was like, yeah, I'm not going to do that because

1565
01:14:20,720 --> 01:14:24,760
Speaker 2: I am a professional, and b you're actually gas lighting

1566
01:14:24,800 --> 01:14:27,439
Speaker 2: everybody that I am a risk that I might turn

1567
01:14:27,479 --> 01:14:29,160
Speaker 2: at any moment, and I've never done it. There's no

1568
01:14:29,200 --> 01:14:33,519
Speaker 2: evidence show you that I've done it. So I noticed

1569
01:14:33,520 --> 01:14:36,599
Speaker 2: a lot more things that I can call out now

1570
01:14:36,720 --> 01:14:39,800
Speaker 2: rather than just go, oh, yeah, maybe I should have

1571
01:14:39,880 --> 01:14:42,720
Speaker 2: done that. Now I'm like, actually, that's incorrect. What you

1572
01:14:42,800 --> 01:14:45,040
Speaker 2: might find is this and this and this, and being

1573
01:14:45,040 --> 01:14:50,880
Speaker 2: a little bit more informed, you know, helps me because

1574
01:14:50,960 --> 01:14:53,120
Speaker 2: before I would just be like, well maybe I don't know,

1575
01:14:53,400 --> 01:14:56,360
Speaker 2: maybe they're right and I'm wrong would be my headspace.

1576
01:14:56,400 --> 01:14:59,519
Speaker 2: As I get older, I'm definitely getting more confidence in

1577
01:14:59,560 --> 01:15:01,360
Speaker 2: the No, I actually know what I'm talking about.

1578
01:15:02,400 --> 01:15:05,000
Speaker 1: Do you think you? Do you ever think yourself off

1579
01:15:05,000 --> 01:15:08,200
Speaker 1: of things about myself? But do you ever think yourself? Fuck?

1580
01:15:08,320 --> 01:15:11,760
Speaker 1: I was actually a very slow maturer. It's taking me

1581
01:15:11,800 --> 01:15:16,680
Speaker 1: to be fifty odd years of age, but I'm in it. No, totally.

1582
01:15:17,920 --> 01:15:20,360
Speaker 2: Just turned up to my intelligence in the last five months.

1583
01:15:20,479 --> 01:15:20,719
Speaker 1: Yep.

1584
01:15:21,160 --> 01:15:22,840
Speaker 2: I don't know whether I was sleep walking. I don't

1585
01:15:22,840 --> 01:15:24,559
Speaker 2: know what I was doing. When I look back at

1586
01:15:24,640 --> 01:15:26,840
Speaker 2: various parts of my life, I was just like what

1587
01:15:26,960 --> 01:15:32,439
Speaker 2: the notice that? Or thinking, yeah, how did I How

1588
01:15:32,439 --> 01:15:36,479
Speaker 2: did I tolerate that? How did I tolerate myself treating

1589
01:15:36,520 --> 01:15:40,439
Speaker 2: myself like that? So I don't know what it is,

1590
01:15:40,479 --> 01:15:42,280
Speaker 2: but I just think it's in the past now, So

1591
01:15:42,320 --> 01:15:44,680
Speaker 2: I better just turn up now and do whatever I

1592
01:15:44,720 --> 01:15:48,759
Speaker 2: can between now and my working years to put things

1593
01:15:48,760 --> 01:15:52,160
Speaker 2: in place. I guess the financials is the only thing

1594
01:15:52,160 --> 01:15:54,479
Speaker 2: I don't kind of feel like I have necessarily locked

1595
01:15:54,520 --> 01:15:56,679
Speaker 2: in place. So that's the thing I'm like, Oh god,

1596
01:15:56,680 --> 01:15:57,920
Speaker 2: this is what I've got to make up for. This

1597
01:15:58,000 --> 01:16:01,480
Speaker 2: is what I've got to work towards over like realistically,

1598
01:16:01,520 --> 01:16:04,400
Speaker 2: one five years, I don't know. I want to Betty

1599
01:16:04,400 --> 01:16:06,439
Speaker 2: White that shit. I want to be working till the grave,

1600
01:16:07,320 --> 01:16:11,280
Speaker 2: but certainly in a slightly higher income section. I don't

1601
01:16:11,320 --> 01:16:13,120
Speaker 2: know that i'd go to last there. So that's why

1602
01:16:13,120 --> 01:16:13,759
Speaker 2: I'm trying.

1603
01:16:13,520 --> 01:16:16,320
Speaker 1: To quickly manage things.

1604
01:16:16,439 --> 01:16:19,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, because I thought it already had Yeah, but then

1605
01:16:19,960 --> 01:16:21,679
Speaker 2: seventy five er is now when I went away.

1606
01:16:21,920 --> 01:16:25,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, but it's stronger you though, to be able to

1607
01:16:25,880 --> 01:16:28,720
Speaker 1: actually accept that position. And the fact is that you've

1608
01:16:28,720 --> 01:16:31,400
Speaker 1: accepted that proposition, and that you've accepted the fact that

1609
01:16:31,439 --> 01:16:32,679
Speaker 1: you have to do what you have to do.

1610
01:16:32,640 --> 01:16:33,320
Speaker 2: And get on with it.

1611
01:16:33,320 --> 01:16:35,479
Speaker 1: It's fucking unbelievable. You've got to get on with It's

1612
01:16:35,640 --> 01:16:37,160
Speaker 1: but that's actually the best part of it.

1613
01:16:37,439 --> 01:16:38,080
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1614
01:16:38,120 --> 01:16:40,400
Speaker 1: And by the way, imagine if it went to it

1615
01:16:40,400 --> 01:16:42,040
Speaker 1: didn't happen until you was sixty.

1616
01:16:41,720 --> 01:16:44,360
Speaker 2: Five, oh mate, very common.

1617
01:16:44,840 --> 01:16:45,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, No, No, it's.

1618
01:16:45,800 --> 01:16:48,200
Speaker 2: Also like some women will have saved, for example, their

1619
01:16:48,400 --> 01:16:52,760
Speaker 2: husband's dropped dead lucky ducks. No judgment anyway, no, but

1620
01:16:53,320 --> 01:16:56,040
Speaker 2: so then they have to find their window in. When

1621
01:16:56,080 --> 01:16:57,840
Speaker 2: I got divorced, I was determined not to ask a

1622
01:16:57,880 --> 01:17:00,960
Speaker 2: single question because I was like that, I will not

1623
01:17:01,080 --> 01:17:05,080
Speaker 2: ask a single question about anything, because I just well,

1624
01:17:05,200 --> 01:17:07,080
Speaker 2: I like the idea of no, I'm being able to

1625
01:17:07,080 --> 01:17:09,040
Speaker 2: work out how I was able to do it. So

1626
01:17:09,160 --> 01:17:12,040
Speaker 2: I just slowed down. There's stuff when I'm like joining

1627
01:17:12,040 --> 01:17:17,040
Speaker 2: websites and slow it downstart again. Now I've got to

1628
01:17:17,120 --> 01:17:21,479
Speaker 2: like program televisions and plug them into my house. Just

1629
01:17:21,600 --> 01:17:27,080
Speaker 2: slow down and do it. So I've upskilled tremendously in

1630
01:17:27,160 --> 01:17:30,400
Speaker 2: that time. But I feel like that might have just

1631
01:17:30,479 --> 01:17:33,320
Speaker 2: reignited my brain to give me a whisper more time

1632
01:17:33,400 --> 01:17:36,959
Speaker 2: that if dementia. I want to be super realistic about dementia,

1633
01:17:37,840 --> 01:17:40,439
Speaker 2: and if it's coming, then I want to have some

1634
01:17:40,479 --> 01:17:42,800
Speaker 2: sort of preparation. I read an amazing article that said

1635
01:17:42,800 --> 01:17:46,200
Speaker 2: that earlier you can recognize it and be honest with yourself,

1636
01:17:46,760 --> 01:17:49,040
Speaker 2: then you can start to put some repeated behaviors in

1637
01:17:49,080 --> 01:17:52,120
Speaker 2: place that will give you what feels like a much

1638
01:17:52,600 --> 01:17:55,679
Speaker 2: better quality of life. Because you'll be able to hopefully,

1639
01:17:55,840 --> 01:17:58,200
Speaker 2: you know, stay in your home a bit longer, you know,

1640
01:17:59,479 --> 01:18:02,320
Speaker 2: and get get a better quality of life happening, if

1641
01:18:02,360 --> 01:18:04,880
Speaker 2: that's what's coming. Because it looks like a shit show.

1642
01:18:05,960 --> 01:18:08,760
Speaker 2: Dementia that's a nightmare.

1643
01:18:09,439 --> 01:18:12,200
Speaker 1: But I mean, I'm getting wound up, We're getting und

1644
01:18:12,240 --> 01:18:14,720
Speaker 1: But I have to say this my gut feeling. I mean,

1645
01:18:14,720 --> 01:18:17,559
Speaker 1: I have seen plenty of people with dementia, mates, family,

1646
01:18:17,560 --> 01:18:20,679
Speaker 1: et cetera. My gut feeling is, Julie, I don't see

1647
01:18:20,720 --> 01:18:23,479
Speaker 1: it of happening to you. I mean, you're only fifty seven,

1648
01:18:23,520 --> 01:18:28,800
Speaker 1: but normally the signs would start to become some of

1649
01:18:28,840 --> 01:18:31,439
Speaker 1: the whispers. I think you're sharper now. I think so too.

1650
01:18:31,520 --> 01:18:33,360
Speaker 1: Then I knew you ten or eleven years ago when

1651
01:18:33,360 --> 01:18:35,240
Speaker 1: I first met you, when you first came to the.

1652
01:18:35,160 --> 01:18:37,679
Speaker 2: Show, could not harness the thoughts properly.

1653
01:18:37,800 --> 01:18:39,760
Speaker 1: You're sharper now, and I don't think it's just because

1654
01:18:39,760 --> 01:18:42,000
Speaker 1: the dexit. But I think you are just sharper. I

1655
01:18:42,080 --> 01:18:46,320
Speaker 1: think you have a bigger grasp on what's going on. Yeah,

1656
01:18:46,439 --> 01:18:48,679
Speaker 1: you're more aware of everything.

1657
01:18:48,439 --> 01:18:51,560
Speaker 2: Totally, just like I have turned up all my volumes

1658
01:18:51,960 --> 01:18:54,719
Speaker 2: of the best parts of myself and all the bad

1659
01:18:54,760 --> 01:18:58,519
Speaker 2: parts of myself. I feel like no longer count because

1660
01:18:58,880 --> 01:18:59,759
Speaker 2: of course I'm.

1661
01:18:59,640 --> 01:19:02,880
Speaker 1: Not well you both. I think it also made has

1662
01:19:02,920 --> 01:19:06,080
Speaker 1: turned on your survivor, Jean, and.

1663
01:19:05,520 --> 01:19:06,960
Speaker 2: Then yeah, and reignited the brain.

1664
01:19:08,160 --> 01:19:11,639
Speaker 1: Get that, Jeanes clicked in and you're in and you're

1665
01:19:11,680 --> 01:19:14,439
Speaker 1: on and then but I actually feel you're gone from

1666
01:19:14,479 --> 01:19:17,719
Speaker 1: survivor or surviving into thriving. I just get that feeling.

1667
01:19:18,120 --> 01:19:20,160
Speaker 1: I'm getting that energy from me, always got energy from you,

1668
01:19:20,240 --> 01:19:23,679
Speaker 1: but you're I mean, I'm getting a real strong positive

1669
01:19:23,720 --> 01:19:25,920
Speaker 1: feeling from you. So you're killing You're killing it, mate.

1670
01:19:25,920 --> 01:19:28,559
Speaker 2: I've never been happier. Yeah, I honestly don't think I've

1671
01:19:28,560 --> 01:19:29,280
Speaker 2: ever been happier.

1672
01:19:29,320 --> 01:19:31,240
Speaker 1: And you definitely don't play the victim. You're you know,

1673
01:19:31,280 --> 01:19:32,960
Speaker 1: you're not carrying that sort of process.

1674
01:19:33,360 --> 01:19:35,360
Speaker 2: We'll bits give you the ships like you know, like

1675
01:19:35,400 --> 01:19:38,559
Speaker 2: I love like swinging maths around my friends, going then

1676
01:19:38,560 --> 01:19:43,720
Speaker 2: this happened, and that happened. But also I feel a

1677
01:19:43,720 --> 01:19:46,240
Speaker 2: little bit like it was starting to be a few

1678
01:19:46,320 --> 01:19:47,280
Speaker 2: years ago now.

1679
01:19:47,400 --> 01:19:49,200
Speaker 1: And knowing this shit anyway, that's in the dust.

1680
01:19:49,200 --> 01:19:50,800
Speaker 2: And also yeah, exactly.

1681
01:19:51,120 --> 01:19:53,800
Speaker 1: Get all mon drama, so like you know that's what

1682
01:19:53,840 --> 01:19:59,360
Speaker 1: they think. Absolutely was saying, no, one. Really. My mother

1683
01:19:59,479 --> 01:20:02,320
Speaker 1: used to say to me all the time, but she's

1684
01:20:03,120 --> 01:20:06,640
Speaker 1: your enemies, enemies don't care, and your friends won't believe you,

1685
01:20:06,760 --> 01:20:09,400
Speaker 1: so she said, So don't waste your.

1686
01:20:09,280 --> 01:20:12,160
Speaker 2: Time trying to convince people. Just get on with it.

1687
01:20:12,160 --> 01:20:13,479
Speaker 1: Don't be the victim. Just get on with it.

1688
01:20:13,520 --> 01:20:15,639
Speaker 2: Do you know what I did when the divorce went down.

1689
01:20:15,960 --> 01:20:17,479
Speaker 2: I was sort of left with a house that wasn't

1690
01:20:17,479 --> 01:20:20,080
Speaker 2: a code because we bought this house in twenty twenty

1691
01:20:20,080 --> 01:20:24,200
Speaker 2: that was like a nineteen seventy six building code beast

1692
01:20:24,600 --> 01:20:27,439
Speaker 2: other thing, and nothing was to building code. Things were

1693
01:20:27,439 --> 01:20:29,920
Speaker 2: too low, they were too high whatever. I had to

1694
01:20:30,360 --> 01:20:34,559
Speaker 2: completely restore this entire house while going through the divorce

1695
01:20:34,600 --> 01:20:36,679
Speaker 2: because I sort of had no choice all of a sudden,

1696
01:20:37,080 --> 01:20:39,320
Speaker 2: all of a sudden, stuff needed to be done. So

1697
01:20:39,400 --> 01:20:42,519
Speaker 2: I also did such a probably a manic two years

1698
01:20:42,560 --> 01:20:46,479
Speaker 2: of getting everything in order that now I walk around

1699
01:20:46,479 --> 01:20:51,679
Speaker 2: my home, it's done. I feel like my finances will

1700
01:20:51,720 --> 01:20:54,320
Speaker 2: start to build now that I've got some things in place,

1701
01:20:54,360 --> 01:20:56,960
Speaker 2: and I'm noticing a plan, and I've got a plan.

1702
01:20:57,280 --> 01:21:01,040
Speaker 2: You've got to make a plan. It is the absolute basics,

1703
01:21:01,080 --> 01:21:03,160
Speaker 2: isn't it. And I think it's never too late to start.

1704
01:21:03,000 --> 01:21:04,960
Speaker 1: One hundred percent. And I think that's one of the

1705
01:21:05,240 --> 01:21:06,840
Speaker 1: I hate the word empowering, but one of the things

1706
01:21:06,920 --> 01:21:09,439
Speaker 1: of getting you on some was you know, you've got

1707
01:21:09,439 --> 01:21:12,719
Speaker 1: to look cut through to actually say that, have a plan.

1708
01:21:12,800 --> 01:21:14,760
Speaker 1: And by the way, you've got to be prepared executed.

1709
01:21:14,360 --> 01:21:17,840
Speaker 2: Though, oh absolutely got execute every day. What about when

1710
01:21:17,960 --> 01:21:18,880
Speaker 2: of them got to do it?

1711
01:21:19,400 --> 01:21:20,400
Speaker 1: But you've got to do it.

1712
01:21:20,840 --> 01:21:21,559
Speaker 2: He's got to do it.

1713
01:21:21,640 --> 01:21:23,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely.

1714
01:21:23,160 --> 01:21:25,400
Speaker 2: And anyone that you can put in place around you

1715
01:21:25,439 --> 01:21:28,000
Speaker 2: that will help you maintain that regularity I think is

1716
01:21:28,040 --> 01:21:29,000
Speaker 2: fantastic as well.

1717
01:21:29,160 --> 01:21:32,200
Speaker 1: Mate. I used to have a mate who unfortunately he

1718
01:21:32,960 --> 01:21:35,439
Speaker 1: had a stroke and pretty young, is about sixty eight

1719
01:21:35,479 --> 01:21:38,759
Speaker 1: six momen. It happened to him and I was winged

1720
01:21:38,840 --> 01:21:40,479
Speaker 1: do him about something that I was going through and

1721
01:21:40,520 --> 01:21:41,880
Speaker 1: he was ten years old. I mean, I was telling

1722
01:21:41,960 --> 01:21:44,200
Speaker 1: Hi about the story about it and I remember saying

1723
01:21:44,200 --> 01:21:47,760
Speaker 1: to me basically sort of he didn't say in such words,

1724
01:21:47,800 --> 01:21:51,400
Speaker 1: but he basically said, listen, Mark, I'm incapacitated here. I'd

1725
01:21:51,439 --> 01:21:54,840
Speaker 1: love to have your problem. And it's a blessing that

1726
01:21:55,160 --> 01:21:57,559
Speaker 1: you can actually do gigs. It's a blessing that you

1727
01:21:57,640 --> 01:22:00,280
Speaker 1: are doing the show for ten it's you know, you

1728
01:22:00,360 --> 01:22:02,960
Speaker 1: have the capacity. That's a blessing. So if you look

1729
01:22:02,960 --> 01:22:05,040
Speaker 1: at it like that, you're killing.

1730
01:22:04,840 --> 01:22:10,040
Speaker 2: It, oh, trailblazer, because certainly in the entertainment sector, or

1731
01:22:10,479 --> 01:22:14,400
Speaker 2: comedy sector or the tough sector beyond, I mean it

1732
01:22:14,560 --> 01:22:17,439
Speaker 2: used to be beyond. You know, you were lucky if

1733
01:22:17,439 --> 01:22:21,000
Speaker 2: you last un till fifty. So there are a series

1734
01:22:21,040 --> 01:22:24,559
Speaker 2: of women and men who are you know, letting that

1735
01:22:24,640 --> 01:22:26,519
Speaker 2: live on a little bit longer in television, and I

1736
01:22:26,600 --> 01:22:29,559
Speaker 2: guess television is an aging audience as well, certainly for

1737
01:22:29,600 --> 01:22:33,640
Speaker 2: free to air television, so you know, because everybody else

1738
01:22:33,720 --> 01:22:36,559
Speaker 2: is kind of streaming. But I think also trying to

1739
01:22:36,560 --> 01:22:39,920
Speaker 2: make the plan of what's coming next. I already know

1740
01:22:40,640 --> 01:22:43,040
Speaker 2: I don't know anywhere near enough about AI, Like I

1741
01:22:43,120 --> 01:22:45,120
Speaker 2: find that all like what if I put in the

1742
01:22:45,120 --> 01:22:46,080
Speaker 2: wrong thing into the search?

1743
01:22:46,120 --> 01:22:48,000
Speaker 1: But is not going to replace the comedian though.

1744
01:22:48,000 --> 01:22:51,080
Speaker 2: No, definitely not your host, but certainly trying to keep

1745
01:22:51,200 --> 01:22:54,400
Speaker 2: up to date with things. I don't want one of

1746
01:22:54,400 --> 01:22:57,160
Speaker 2: these big systems within the next ten years to pass

1747
01:22:57,200 --> 01:23:00,599
Speaker 2: me by, Like I can't get on Instagram because it's

1748
01:23:00,640 --> 01:23:03,080
Speaker 2: just it's just another thing. I don't want to be

1749
01:23:03,120 --> 01:23:05,280
Speaker 2: like that about a AI, and I don't want to

1750
01:23:05,960 --> 01:23:08,200
Speaker 2: be like that about any developments, because I want to

1751
01:23:08,240 --> 01:23:10,840
Speaker 2: still be a part of the conversation as I now move,

1752
01:23:11,240 --> 01:23:13,920
Speaker 2: you know, to get older and older. I don't want

1753
01:23:13,920 --> 01:23:17,360
Speaker 2: to be oh I didn't. I didn't know. That's what

1754
01:23:17,400 --> 01:23:19,320
Speaker 2: Instagram does. I want to be on top of that

1755
01:23:20,120 --> 01:23:22,040
Speaker 2: so that can still feel like I'm a part of,

1756
01:23:22,320 --> 01:23:24,560
Speaker 2: you know, the epicenter of society.

1757
01:23:25,479 --> 01:23:29,200
Speaker 1: Well, Julia one, I want to say thanks very much

1758
01:23:29,240 --> 01:23:31,519
Speaker 1: for coming up to do the podcast. But I got

1759
01:23:31,520 --> 01:23:36,960
Speaker 1: two words for you, and you never stop doing this inspired.

1760
01:23:37,400 --> 01:23:39,200
Speaker 1: You're inspiring, You're actually inspiring.

1761
01:23:39,439 --> 01:23:41,120
Speaker 2: Ah, thank you. I thought you were going to say

1762
01:23:41,120 --> 01:23:41,639
Speaker 2: you're fired.

1763
01:23:41,840 --> 01:23:47,880
Speaker 1: And the second word is full respect man, thank you respect.

1764
01:23:48,680 --> 01:23:51,000
Speaker 1: Good one yea, Julian Morris, thanks very much