1 00:00:05,921 --> 00:00:13,681 Speaker 1: Apogee Production, Life stuff, life, parenting. 2 00:00:14,281 --> 00:00:16,441 Speaker 2: We're doing life together and we're just going to tell 3 00:00:16,481 --> 00:00:17,161 Speaker 2: you all about it. 4 00:00:17,601 --> 00:00:21,881 Speaker 1: I hate the word perimenopause. I can't We're not in menopause. 5 00:00:21,961 --> 00:00:23,041 Speaker 1: Like it's making me angry. 6 00:00:23,761 --> 00:00:28,321 Speaker 2: What Welcome to. 7 00:00:28,361 --> 00:00:30,521 Speaker 1: Our very first episode of Who. 8 00:00:30,641 --> 00:00:34,441 Speaker 2: Even Are We? I would say that most of our 9 00:00:34,521 --> 00:00:36,840 Speaker 2: listeners have been with us since the start of Am 10 00:00:36,841 --> 00:00:39,481 Speaker 2: I A Bad Mum? And now we've had a glow 11 00:00:39,601 --> 00:00:43,760 Speaker 2: up for twenty twenty six and we are here still 12 00:00:43,961 --> 00:00:46,881 Speaker 2: questioning now ourselves rather than our kids. 13 00:00:48,081 --> 00:00:50,760 Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, we've done a lot of content over the years, 14 00:00:50,801 --> 00:00:52,560 Speaker 1: and we've talked about a lot of things, and I 15 00:00:52,601 --> 00:00:55,401 Speaker 1: know some of the really hard hitting topics in AMI 16 00:00:55,521 --> 00:00:58,361 Speaker 1: Bad Mum. We've talked about post natal depression. We've talked 17 00:00:58,401 --> 00:01:00,920 Speaker 1: about some of the serious things. Then there are a 18 00:01:00,961 --> 00:01:04,441 Speaker 1: lot of lighthearted, you know mess ups. You served your 19 00:01:04,521 --> 00:01:09,401 Speaker 1: kids smoothie. One time we forgot to pack our kids lunch. 20 00:01:09,521 --> 00:01:11,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, I forgot tuck shop. I don't know how many 21 00:01:11,521 --> 00:01:11,961 Speaker 2: times I. 22 00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:13,880 Speaker 1: Left them at the school gate at like five pm 23 00:01:13,920 --> 00:01:17,560 Speaker 1: as it started to get dark. Like we've talked about 24 00:01:17,601 --> 00:01:21,041 Speaker 1: all the things now in this episode, this is something 25 00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:24,721 Speaker 1: that I realized that I am really interested in finding 26 00:01:24,801 --> 00:01:28,601 Speaker 1: out and we've been friends for a number of years. Yes, 27 00:01:28,640 --> 00:01:31,080 Speaker 1: but I've never really asked you about and I don't 28 00:01:31,121 --> 00:01:33,200 Speaker 1: think you've ever really spoken about and you certainly haven't 29 00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:38,961 Speaker 1: spoken about it in public, and that is being missus Thyday. Now, 30 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:42,961 Speaker 1: as we know, you are married to Sam Thyday, who 31 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:48,081 Speaker 1: was a rugby league player, played for Queensland, played for Australia, 32 00:01:48,281 --> 00:01:50,281 Speaker 1: played for the Brisbane Broncos. 33 00:01:49,841 --> 00:01:52,761 Speaker 2: For how many years, like sixteen I think, yeah, okay, 34 00:01:52,801 --> 00:01:56,441 Speaker 2: sixteen years at Bronx. Something like thirty games for Queensland 35 00:01:56,441 --> 00:01:59,201 Speaker 2: in the state of origin and then Australia is about 36 00:01:59,201 --> 00:02:01,801 Speaker 2: the same. I think it was between thirty twenty thirty 37 00:02:01,841 --> 00:02:04,881 Speaker 2: somewhere around that as well when he was representing Australia. Yeah, 38 00:02:05,121 --> 00:02:07,361 Speaker 2: so up there with a stellar career within the rugby 39 00:02:07,441 --> 00:02:08,761 Speaker 2: league community. Yeah. 40 00:02:09,481 --> 00:02:12,561 Speaker 1: Now you first met at high school. You both went 41 00:02:12,601 --> 00:02:16,081 Speaker 1: to school in Townsville. You were friends back then, you 42 00:02:16,161 --> 00:02:17,960 Speaker 1: went to the form all together. 43 00:02:18,081 --> 00:02:20,441 Speaker 2: Yeah, we went to school for Maul together. We met 44 00:02:20,441 --> 00:02:22,921 Speaker 2: in grade eight. I think we dated for a week 45 00:02:22,960 --> 00:02:25,240 Speaker 2: in grade eight. And like when you're dating in grade eight, 46 00:02:25,721 --> 00:02:28,120 Speaker 2: first year in high school, like what does that even mean? 47 00:02:28,520 --> 00:02:31,321 Speaker 2: Like it really wasn't interested. I don't think he was interested. 48 00:02:31,361 --> 00:02:33,841 Speaker 2: He was like it was like dating a mute, Like 49 00:02:33,921 --> 00:02:36,041 Speaker 2: he didn't talk, like he wanted to go out with me, 50 00:02:36,201 --> 00:02:39,321 Speaker 2: but then he just didn't talk. So that lasted a 51 00:02:39,361 --> 00:02:41,761 Speaker 2: whole week, and then I was like, sorry, you're dumped. 52 00:02:42,001 --> 00:02:47,000 Speaker 1: When you did finally get together, like as in girlfriend boyfriend. 53 00:02:46,761 --> 00:02:52,201 Speaker 2: Fast forward, yep, how old were you twenty six? Yeah? 54 00:02:52,201 --> 00:02:55,561 Speaker 1: Okay, so you stayed in contact, you were friends, You 55 00:02:55,601 --> 00:02:59,881 Speaker 1: had your own career. You were a air host hostess yea, 56 00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:03,801 Speaker 1: and you were jetting around the world, and you and 57 00:03:03,841 --> 00:03:07,281 Speaker 1: Sam kept in contact. Now, in the meantime, he was 58 00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:11,960 Speaker 1: doing very well with football and had gone down to Brisbane. 59 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:14,001 Speaker 1: Was it like an under eighteens? 60 00:03:14,321 --> 00:03:17,601 Speaker 2: Yeah? I think we finished high school. I moved to Brisbane. 61 00:03:17,721 --> 00:03:21,001 Speaker 2: I was playing at the top level of netball in Townsville, 62 00:03:21,121 --> 00:03:22,960 Speaker 2: and then I wanted to go a little bit further 63 00:03:23,001 --> 00:03:24,561 Speaker 2: with it, and the only way to do that was 64 00:03:24,601 --> 00:03:26,641 Speaker 2: to move to the Big Smoke. So my sites were 65 00:03:26,641 --> 00:03:29,520 Speaker 2: set on Brisbane as soon as I finished high school, 66 00:03:29,561 --> 00:03:32,240 Speaker 2: like I'd had enough of Townsville and I was ready 67 00:03:32,281 --> 00:03:34,761 Speaker 2: to fly the coop. Sam at the same time, he 68 00:03:34,801 --> 00:03:37,401 Speaker 2: was still up there. He got picked up. A couple 69 00:03:37,401 --> 00:03:39,881 Speaker 2: of the scouts from the Broncos were up there and 70 00:03:40,481 --> 00:03:43,641 Speaker 2: had offered him a position in the younger grades of 71 00:03:43,721 --> 00:03:47,321 Speaker 2: the Broncos, a long term agenda of the Broncos basically, 72 00:03:47,401 --> 00:03:50,361 Speaker 2: so they start off in what they were calling out 73 00:03:50,361 --> 00:03:53,841 Speaker 2: the time, Queensland Cup, which is basically the feeder teams 74 00:03:53,921 --> 00:03:57,841 Speaker 2: to the NRL. I think he moved down eighteen. He 75 00:03:57,921 --> 00:04:01,121 Speaker 2: might have been just shy of eighteen. No license, not 76 00:04:01,201 --> 00:04:03,521 Speaker 2: really use public transport, so it was a wild ride 77 00:04:03,561 --> 00:04:07,041 Speaker 2: for him and then he his way into obviously the 78 00:04:07,121 --> 00:04:08,321 Speaker 2: first grade team. 79 00:04:08,601 --> 00:04:11,721 Speaker 1: So when you eventually got together, Yeah, what did that 80 00:04:11,801 --> 00:04:14,841 Speaker 1: look like in terms of his work? What was he 81 00:04:14,881 --> 00:04:16,001 Speaker 1: doing at that time? 82 00:04:16,561 --> 00:04:18,081 Speaker 2: Well, I feel like there was a couple of years 83 00:04:18,081 --> 00:04:20,481 Speaker 2: in the mix. I remember being in Australia two thousand 84 00:04:20,521 --> 00:04:22,600 Speaker 2: and six. We were still best mates at the time. 85 00:04:22,721 --> 00:04:25,161 Speaker 2: I went with his mum and watched them win the 86 00:04:25,201 --> 00:04:27,961 Speaker 2: Grand Final. So he was then at that time playing 87 00:04:27,961 --> 00:04:30,760 Speaker 2: first grade for the Bronx. He was sort of playing 88 00:04:30,801 --> 00:04:33,561 Speaker 2: first grade getting dropped, playing first grade getting dropped, and 89 00:04:33,601 --> 00:04:36,601 Speaker 2: then two thousand and six I remember them going to Sydney, 90 00:04:36,761 --> 00:04:38,721 Speaker 2: sitting on the sideline with his mum cheering him on 91 00:04:38,801 --> 00:04:41,640 Speaker 2: and they won the Grand Final. His career sort of 92 00:04:41,681 --> 00:04:44,241 Speaker 2: like blossomed from there. It was like from there he 93 00:04:44,281 --> 00:04:47,201 Speaker 2: then got picked for Origin for Origin, then the Green 94 00:04:47,241 --> 00:04:49,681 Speaker 2: and Gold Jersey, and it was like that now at 95 00:04:49,721 --> 00:04:51,441 Speaker 2: the same time, we were just mates all the way 96 00:04:51,481 --> 00:04:54,080 Speaker 2: through that. And then I decided that I'm going to 97 00:04:54,081 --> 00:04:56,921 Speaker 2: move to the Middle East for three years and he 98 00:04:56,961 --> 00:04:59,921 Speaker 2: was still here doing his thing. So fast forward to 99 00:05:00,081 --> 00:05:03,760 Speaker 2: then when I moved back from living abroad and flying 100 00:05:03,761 --> 00:05:07,161 Speaker 2: around the world, connected all the way through. I came 101 00:05:07,241 --> 00:05:09,640 Speaker 2: back the same time my brother was moving back to 102 00:05:09,721 --> 00:05:12,961 Speaker 2: Australia as well, and we were both coming back and 103 00:05:13,001 --> 00:05:15,640 Speaker 2: basically looking for a place to live in Brisbane. And 104 00:05:15,721 --> 00:05:17,361 Speaker 2: I remember Sam at the time, I was like, why 105 00:05:17,401 --> 00:05:19,721 Speaker 2: don't you just come and stay at my place and 106 00:05:20,201 --> 00:05:22,121 Speaker 2: stay like a week or two. So Luke and I, 107 00:05:22,201 --> 00:05:23,801 Speaker 2: my brother and I were sharing a room and we 108 00:05:23,921 --> 00:05:26,041 Speaker 2: just literally were camping out there for a week or 109 00:05:26,081 --> 00:05:27,961 Speaker 2: two before we found our own place kind of thing. 110 00:05:28,801 --> 00:05:30,921 Speaker 2: And in that duration it was sort of like, you know, 111 00:05:31,001 --> 00:05:34,161 Speaker 2: Sam was putting the hard word on you know, why 112 00:05:34,440 --> 00:05:38,281 Speaker 2: like why why have we never crossed that path? Yeah, 113 00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:40,601 Speaker 2: it was kind of like, well, we've never been on 114 00:05:40,641 --> 00:05:43,921 Speaker 2: a date, like, our friendship works, but nothing is guaranteed 115 00:05:43,961 --> 00:05:45,921 Speaker 2: after that, you know, and you're sort of like, it's 116 00:05:45,961 --> 00:05:49,440 Speaker 2: a gamble. You roll the dice on it working or 117 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:51,361 Speaker 2: not working, and then at the end of that, if 118 00:05:51,361 --> 00:05:53,881 Speaker 2: it doesn't work, you've got to forfeit the friendship as well, 119 00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:56,961 Speaker 2: because we'd had the friendship since like grade eight as well. 120 00:05:57,281 --> 00:05:59,200 Speaker 2: So then yeah, I was like, you've got to do 121 00:05:59,320 --> 00:06:01,640 Speaker 2: the same thing that you've already been doing with other girls, 122 00:06:01,681 --> 00:06:04,041 Speaker 2: like I want to be whined and dined and go 123 00:06:04,121 --> 00:06:07,320 Speaker 2: on dates and women on a date. It all happened 124 00:06:07,401 --> 00:06:08,241 Speaker 2: very quickly after that. 125 00:06:08,921 --> 00:06:13,401 Speaker 1: So when you were together, what was life like all 126 00:06:13,440 --> 00:06:17,281 Speaker 1: of a sudden being thrust into being the girlfriend of 127 00:06:17,561 --> 00:06:20,201 Speaker 1: a Broncos player. Do you remember what that felt like. 128 00:06:20,721 --> 00:06:24,041 Speaker 2: I'm probably not your best example of a WAG. I 129 00:06:24,081 --> 00:06:25,481 Speaker 2: know that we'll get to that, and I know you're 130 00:06:25,521 --> 00:06:27,840 Speaker 2: dying to ask me that I'm not your best example 131 00:06:27,841 --> 00:06:30,241 Speaker 2: of a wag. I've never really enjoyed it. I've never 132 00:06:30,401 --> 00:06:34,281 Speaker 2: enjoyed the idea that people sort of label you immediately. 133 00:06:34,921 --> 00:06:37,520 Speaker 2: It was immediate. It was like as soon as you 134 00:06:37,561 --> 00:06:40,001 Speaker 2: were a girlfriend and it was vicial and then it 135 00:06:40,081 --> 00:06:43,041 Speaker 2: might see it on social media, it was like, oh, 136 00:06:43,081 --> 00:06:45,721 Speaker 2: you're a wag, Katie. It just didn't sit well. I 137 00:06:45,801 --> 00:06:49,921 Speaker 2: was like, you don't even know what I've Like, I've 138 00:06:49,921 --> 00:06:52,521 Speaker 2: been doing all of this other stuff, the same stuff 139 00:06:52,521 --> 00:06:54,880 Speaker 2: of what a girlfriend should be doing, except for the 140 00:06:55,121 --> 00:06:58,601 Speaker 2: actual girlfriend part of all the physical I've supported him 141 00:06:58,601 --> 00:07:02,801 Speaker 2: emotionally as a friend this entire career, Like, I've been 142 00:07:02,841 --> 00:07:05,721 Speaker 2: doing all the shit that people do in the background 143 00:07:05,721 --> 00:07:08,161 Speaker 2: that you don't see or hear, and so then just 144 00:07:08,201 --> 00:07:10,681 Speaker 2: to get labeled as that I sort of didn't sit 145 00:07:10,721 --> 00:07:11,361 Speaker 2: well with me. 146 00:07:11,841 --> 00:07:15,001 Speaker 1: What was always interesting for me is that even when 147 00:07:15,161 --> 00:07:20,441 Speaker 1: I met you, which was twenty eighteen, Yeah, you didn't 148 00:07:20,481 --> 00:07:24,441 Speaker 1: even have a public Instagram, you had a private Instagram. 149 00:07:24,561 --> 00:07:26,121 Speaker 1: You didn't want to be on show at all. 150 00:07:26,401 --> 00:07:26,481 Speaker 2: No. 151 00:07:26,641 --> 00:07:28,841 Speaker 1: And I remember even having a conversation with Sam and 152 00:07:28,881 --> 00:07:32,281 Speaker 1: he said, oh, I can't tag Rachel and Instagram post 153 00:07:32,281 --> 00:07:34,041 Speaker 1: because and people try and follow her and she gets 154 00:07:34,081 --> 00:07:34,761 Speaker 1: really annoyed. 155 00:07:36,401 --> 00:07:40,841 Speaker 2: I think because with labels come stigma, and I was 156 00:07:40,881 --> 00:07:43,721 Speaker 2: a different age than Katie, like I can say what 157 00:07:43,761 --> 00:07:47,201 Speaker 2: I think now and really don't give a fuck about 158 00:07:47,201 --> 00:07:51,401 Speaker 2: what people think. When I was twenty six, people's perception 159 00:07:51,601 --> 00:07:53,881 Speaker 2: that they knew me straight away that oh, you're just 160 00:07:53,921 --> 00:07:56,801 Speaker 2: a wag, Like just a wag? What the fuck does 161 00:07:56,801 --> 00:07:59,361 Speaker 2: that mean? No, No, hang on a second, I'm Rachel. 162 00:07:59,401 --> 00:08:01,881 Speaker 2: How you doing. At the same time came the stigma 163 00:08:01,921 --> 00:08:04,801 Speaker 2: of like, you're just there for one reason, you want 164 00:08:04,801 --> 00:08:06,841 Speaker 2: that from him, you want to be in the star, 165 00:08:07,041 --> 00:08:08,761 Speaker 2: like you want to build a business off the back 166 00:08:08,801 --> 00:08:13,361 Speaker 2: of him. I hated all of it. Don't get me wrong, 167 00:08:13,521 --> 00:08:15,561 Speaker 2: love some niceties that come with it. I've met some 168 00:08:15,641 --> 00:08:20,081 Speaker 2: amazing people, like really amazing people. But from that day 169 00:08:20,481 --> 00:08:22,561 Speaker 2: still to this day, because he's still aligned with the 170 00:08:22,561 --> 00:08:25,761 Speaker 2: Broncos now is that was his workplace. He was lucky 171 00:08:25,841 --> 00:08:27,761 Speaker 2: enough to be doing a job that he loved, and 172 00:08:27,841 --> 00:08:31,321 Speaker 2: I supported him. No different to you supporting your husband 173 00:08:31,401 --> 00:08:34,241 Speaker 2: when he's doing his business running over do it like whatever, 174 00:08:34,401 --> 00:08:37,041 Speaker 2: you know, you're just doing it. I didn't see it 175 00:08:37,041 --> 00:08:39,041 Speaker 2: as anything else. So when people come up to me 176 00:08:39,081 --> 00:08:40,961 Speaker 2: and they're like, oh, I know where you're there and 177 00:08:41,001 --> 00:08:42,961 Speaker 2: you're a gold digger, or you're this, or you're that, 178 00:08:43,081 --> 00:08:45,641 Speaker 2: and they had this instant perception of who you are, 179 00:08:46,481 --> 00:08:49,481 Speaker 2: just like you didn't fly. And there are some people, 180 00:08:50,081 --> 00:08:53,681 Speaker 2: some people, I mean maybe some past relationships that make 181 00:08:53,761 --> 00:08:56,641 Speaker 2: it look that way. And I get it. I get it. 182 00:08:57,041 --> 00:09:00,001 Speaker 2: People want to create that. Some people love the idea. 183 00:09:00,081 --> 00:09:02,321 Speaker 2: Some people I met in the group were like, I 184 00:09:02,441 --> 00:09:08,001 Speaker 2: just dreamt of marrying a footballer. Ah, okay, what's nice 185 00:09:08,041 --> 00:09:10,201 Speaker 2: to meet you. I'm Rachel. You know, like, we all 186 00:09:10,241 --> 00:09:13,161 Speaker 2: have different things that we really want out of life, 187 00:09:13,201 --> 00:09:15,921 Speaker 2: and I guess mine wasn't to be a whack. 188 00:09:16,401 --> 00:09:20,041 Speaker 1: How did you find things like headlines like newspapers, writing 189 00:09:20,081 --> 00:09:22,121 Speaker 1: things and then all of a sudden, like your name 190 00:09:22,241 --> 00:09:24,961 Speaker 1: being put in things like that. Was that a weird feeling? 191 00:09:25,601 --> 00:09:28,521 Speaker 2: Yeah? I feel like the part that comes with it 192 00:09:28,561 --> 00:09:34,161 Speaker 2: is that with his job comes another avenue of people 193 00:09:34,201 --> 00:09:36,361 Speaker 2: wanting to know you, people wanting to be a part 194 00:09:36,401 --> 00:09:38,681 Speaker 2: of your life, and I don't want to making emotional 195 00:09:39,761 --> 00:09:43,881 Speaker 2: people also then that support you, there's others that want 196 00:09:43,921 --> 00:09:47,081 Speaker 2: to tear you down, and that's natural that comes with life. 197 00:09:47,121 --> 00:09:50,721 Speaker 2: But with the option of people, then you know, like 198 00:09:51,401 --> 00:09:54,041 Speaker 2: they think that they know you, or they think that 199 00:09:54,121 --> 00:09:59,201 Speaker 2: they can see that your life is so perfect, like Katie, 200 00:09:59,201 --> 00:10:03,121 Speaker 2: that's tiring. People don't see what goes on in the background. 201 00:10:03,241 --> 00:10:05,681 Speaker 2: And this is like, I'm not emotional because pull me. 202 00:10:05,921 --> 00:10:10,001 Speaker 2: It's not that, it's just that there's a lot of 203 00:10:10,041 --> 00:10:12,561 Speaker 2: work that goes on in the background. No different to 204 00:10:12,681 --> 00:10:16,001 Speaker 2: being the wife to a five FO guy that goes 205 00:10:16,001 --> 00:10:17,841 Speaker 2: to the minds and comes back and goes to the 206 00:10:17,921 --> 00:10:20,241 Speaker 2: lines and comes back, because really, at the end of 207 00:10:20,281 --> 00:10:21,881 Speaker 2: the day, you're doing a lot of it solo. 208 00:10:23,641 --> 00:10:28,721 Speaker 1: Did you lose any friends over becoming I guess more 209 00:10:28,721 --> 00:10:29,761 Speaker 1: in the public eye. 210 00:10:30,041 --> 00:10:31,561 Speaker 2: Yeah, there was a few that dropped off. 211 00:10:31,681 --> 00:10:33,641 Speaker 1: Do you feel like there were people that used to you. 212 00:10:34,401 --> 00:10:38,281 Speaker 2: Absolutely, people love it, and they love it for one 213 00:10:38,321 --> 00:10:42,601 Speaker 2: reason only because you've got a notoriety. But it's not forever. 214 00:10:43,401 --> 00:10:46,521 Speaker 2: It's like short lived. Like Sam was just lucky enough 215 00:10:46,521 --> 00:10:50,521 Speaker 2: that he had a flourishing career in football, doing and 216 00:10:50,601 --> 00:10:52,721 Speaker 2: playing something that he loved for a club that he 217 00:10:52,721 --> 00:10:57,161 Speaker 2: would have died for. Like, honestly, that man's loyalty to 218 00:10:57,281 --> 00:11:01,241 Speaker 2: that club it was fierce. You know it still is now. 219 00:11:01,721 --> 00:11:06,281 Speaker 2: And I admire that in him because I think it 220 00:11:06,321 --> 00:11:08,241 Speaker 2: was me and I was a player I would have moved. 221 00:11:08,681 --> 00:11:11,121 Speaker 2: I think I pushed in that last contract so hard 222 00:11:11,161 --> 00:11:14,361 Speaker 2: to be moving to Melbourne and he was like, nope, nope, 223 00:11:14,481 --> 00:11:16,321 Speaker 2: They've been good to me. I've been good to them, 224 00:11:16,401 --> 00:11:19,401 Speaker 2: and I know that the loyalty also came with the 225 00:11:19,441 --> 00:11:22,761 Speaker 2: community of the Broncos supporters, because they're the people at 226 00:11:22,761 --> 00:11:25,441 Speaker 2: the end of the day that that counts. 227 00:11:27,241 --> 00:11:29,081 Speaker 1: I think one of the reasons why I wanted to 228 00:11:29,121 --> 00:11:31,601 Speaker 1: chat to you about this was because there is an 229 00:11:31,641 --> 00:11:37,841 Speaker 1: assumption that you are married to a footballer, so therefore 230 00:11:37,881 --> 00:11:40,961 Speaker 1: your life is amazing, You've got lots of money, You're 231 00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:45,761 Speaker 1: being invited to everything. I feel like everyone only sees 232 00:11:45,841 --> 00:11:50,001 Speaker 1: that rosy side of it, whereas in actual fact, I 233 00:11:50,041 --> 00:11:54,441 Speaker 1: think it would be very hard being the person. So 234 00:11:54,681 --> 00:11:58,641 Speaker 1: Sam's in the spotlight, he's doing that job, He's getting 235 00:11:58,681 --> 00:12:01,561 Speaker 1: the attention because that comes with the job. It's not 236 00:12:01,641 --> 00:12:06,441 Speaker 1: your job, and so how is that always being Sam's 237 00:12:06,521 --> 00:12:07,081 Speaker 1: plus one? 238 00:12:07,721 --> 00:12:10,921 Speaker 2: Yeah, I think you know. Like again, I think it's 239 00:12:11,121 --> 00:12:13,241 Speaker 2: the whole age, the timing and the age. Like I 240 00:12:13,241 --> 00:12:15,561 Speaker 2: think that as women, we sort of like go through 241 00:12:15,601 --> 00:12:19,241 Speaker 2: such big changes through ages, and maybe like at that 242 00:12:19,401 --> 00:12:22,161 Speaker 2: time of my life, I sort of felt like I 243 00:12:22,241 --> 00:12:24,921 Speaker 2: almost had a role to play, and so I just 244 00:12:25,001 --> 00:12:27,441 Speaker 2: played the role. I can tell you that now because 245 00:12:27,481 --> 00:12:29,961 Speaker 2: I'm forty and I sort of look and go what 246 00:12:30,161 --> 00:12:33,481 Speaker 2: I've done things differently, you know, And I think there's 247 00:12:33,521 --> 00:12:35,321 Speaker 2: this thing that goes with it it's almost like a 248 00:12:35,601 --> 00:12:38,561 Speaker 2: king maker, right like behind every king as a queen. 249 00:12:39,441 --> 00:12:40,841 Speaker 2: You know, at the end of the day, the queen's 250 00:12:40,881 --> 00:12:43,281 Speaker 2: the one that's making all the shifts, all the moves, 251 00:12:43,321 --> 00:12:46,521 Speaker 2: all the directives, all the changes, all the like. Really, 252 00:12:46,561 --> 00:12:48,481 Speaker 2: at the end of the day, the queen builds and 253 00:12:48,521 --> 00:12:51,641 Speaker 2: makes the king. The king sits there as the sparkly ornament. 254 00:12:52,041 --> 00:12:54,441 Speaker 2: But behind every king is the queen that's doing it 255 00:12:54,521 --> 00:12:57,121 Speaker 2: all and making it all and changing it all and 256 00:12:57,881 --> 00:13:00,561 Speaker 2: having kids and raising kids. And it's almost like the 257 00:13:00,641 --> 00:13:03,001 Speaker 2: king maker. I sort of have, you know, I read 258 00:13:03,001 --> 00:13:04,441 Speaker 2: about it and then I sort of went, oh, I 259 00:13:04,481 --> 00:13:07,201 Speaker 2: feel like maybe that's how I can sort of see 260 00:13:07,241 --> 00:13:10,641 Speaker 2: it as because you don't see what happens behind you. 261 00:13:10,601 --> 00:13:14,241 Speaker 1: Know, is there moments where that's annoying? So you know 262 00:13:14,601 --> 00:13:16,561 Speaker 1: how much you put into it and you're playing that 263 00:13:16,681 --> 00:13:18,281 Speaker 1: role and all the rest of it, and you've both 264 00:13:18,281 --> 00:13:20,281 Speaker 1: got your own roles, but yet he's the one that's 265 00:13:20,281 --> 00:13:24,321 Speaker 1: getting all the attention and the praise and the lovable sam. 266 00:13:24,401 --> 00:13:26,241 Speaker 2: I don't think it mattered at the start because I 267 00:13:26,361 --> 00:13:27,881 Speaker 2: wasn't really concerned about it. 268 00:13:28,001 --> 00:13:30,761 Speaker 1: Because I imagine there would be a part I definitely 269 00:13:30,801 --> 00:13:34,041 Speaker 1: would feel this way that's like, well, he's the legend, 270 00:13:34,401 --> 00:13:36,921 Speaker 1: but what about me, Like, look at what I'm doing, 271 00:13:36,961 --> 00:13:38,601 Speaker 1: and just because he's the face of. 272 00:13:38,521 --> 00:13:42,121 Speaker 2: It, Yeah, I think mine didn't come through until after 273 00:13:42,361 --> 00:13:45,721 Speaker 2: our second baby, and people didn't like that. I didn't 274 00:13:45,761 --> 00:13:47,921 Speaker 2: show like and I know that deep down, like Sam 275 00:13:47,961 --> 00:13:50,521 Speaker 2: would never say it, but I know that there was 276 00:13:50,601 --> 00:13:54,081 Speaker 2: like a shift because when you have children, when you 277 00:13:54,081 --> 00:13:59,241 Speaker 2: have babies, your priority shift naturally, and that's what happened, 278 00:13:59,361 --> 00:14:04,160 Speaker 2: Like naturally, I just shifted. The kids were my priority. 279 00:14:04,601 --> 00:14:06,841 Speaker 2: I didn't need to be at every Friday game. I 280 00:14:06,881 --> 00:14:09,601 Speaker 2: didn't need to be in the spotlight. I didn't need 281 00:14:09,641 --> 00:14:12,601 Speaker 2: to be taking them, and I didn't like that people 282 00:14:12,681 --> 00:14:15,641 Speaker 2: wanted to touch them. I you know, like there's so 283 00:14:15,761 --> 00:14:17,921 Speaker 2: many little things that now I think about it, But 284 00:14:17,961 --> 00:14:20,201 Speaker 2: mind you, I also like I look back now and 285 00:14:20,241 --> 00:14:22,881 Speaker 2: I go, I suffered pretty badly with postnator, with both 286 00:14:22,921 --> 00:14:24,521 Speaker 2: of them. Did I know that at the time. I 287 00:14:24,561 --> 00:14:27,361 Speaker 2: didn't know that with our firstborn, but now I understand why, 288 00:14:27,441 --> 00:14:31,001 Speaker 2: and I understand that I was and then our second born, well, 289 00:14:31,041 --> 00:14:33,481 Speaker 2: it was that evident that my life couldn't function for 290 00:14:33,521 --> 00:14:37,481 Speaker 2: nearly twelve months, and yeah, I took a step back 291 00:14:37,561 --> 00:14:39,601 Speaker 2: and with the step back then, you know, I would 292 00:14:39,641 --> 00:14:41,481 Speaker 2: say to Sam all the time, like we support you 293 00:14:41,561 --> 00:14:43,401 Speaker 2: and we love you. We're just doing it from the couch. 294 00:14:44,401 --> 00:14:47,561 Speaker 2: But then with that came like this almost like stigma 295 00:14:47,601 --> 00:14:50,121 Speaker 2: around like, oh, why is Rach and the girls not here? 296 00:14:50,401 --> 00:14:52,281 Speaker 2: Like why is Rach and the girls? And you're sort 297 00:14:52,281 --> 00:14:55,761 Speaker 2: of like, man, do you show up to Jay's workplace 298 00:14:55,841 --> 00:14:59,401 Speaker 2: every single week just to be seen? You don't know? 299 00:15:00,121 --> 00:15:02,361 Speaker 1: And was there ever like a I'm sure you got 300 00:15:02,401 --> 00:15:04,161 Speaker 1: to a point where it wasn't, But was there ever 301 00:15:04,281 --> 00:15:08,201 Speaker 1: like a foamer of him being at something and getting 302 00:15:08,201 --> 00:15:10,361 Speaker 1: all this attention and you know what it's like, well 303 00:15:10,361 --> 00:15:11,761 Speaker 1: with people going can I have a photo? 304 00:15:11,961 --> 00:15:13,641 Speaker 2: It got to the point where I understood that it 305 00:15:13,641 --> 00:15:16,641 Speaker 2: was his job. I absolutely respect the fact that people 306 00:15:16,641 --> 00:15:19,521 Speaker 2: should be polite about what they want from him, like 307 00:15:19,681 --> 00:15:22,481 Speaker 2: any other human being asking something of another human being. 308 00:15:23,401 --> 00:15:25,561 Speaker 2: There were so many cases of that. When we first 309 00:15:25,561 --> 00:15:28,721 Speaker 2: got together, Katie, I remember we were in a nightclub 310 00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:30,641 Speaker 2: and we were walking out and we were all tough 311 00:15:30,641 --> 00:15:33,081 Speaker 2: because we were in that love bubble, just got together 312 00:15:33,161 --> 00:15:35,441 Speaker 2: all the rest and these girls came up and they 313 00:15:35,561 --> 00:15:38,681 Speaker 2: just basically bombarded us and like slid like we were 314 00:15:38,721 --> 00:15:41,361 Speaker 2: holding hands and they sort of like went between us, 315 00:15:41,681 --> 00:15:43,121 Speaker 2: slid me out of the way, and then just like 316 00:15:43,161 --> 00:15:49,201 Speaker 2: we're like mauling him. And I remember going, what what 317 00:15:49,201 --> 00:15:49,721 Speaker 2: what is this? 318 00:15:49,921 --> 00:15:52,201 Speaker 1: I have some self respect, you know, And at the 319 00:15:52,321 --> 00:15:54,721 Speaker 1: end of the day, day, how did that make you feel? 320 00:15:54,721 --> 00:16:00,041 Speaker 2: Though you're constantly on guard. But it's kind of like 321 00:16:00,081 --> 00:16:03,361 Speaker 2: people coming up at dinner. You should sign my paper, 322 00:16:03,481 --> 00:16:05,721 Speaker 2: doesn't matter if I've slammed the paper down on the 323 00:16:05,761 --> 00:16:08,361 Speaker 2: dinner table. In between your meals, in between the moment 324 00:16:08,401 --> 00:16:10,801 Speaker 2: that you're putting food in your mouth, you should get 325 00:16:10,801 --> 00:16:13,921 Speaker 2: a photo with me. You should sign my paper, and 326 00:16:13,961 --> 00:16:16,921 Speaker 2: you look and go hang on. I remember saying that 327 00:16:16,961 --> 00:16:19,041 Speaker 2: to her. It was a father and son and we 328 00:16:19,441 --> 00:16:23,281 Speaker 2: Sam was literally bringing the steak to his mouth. And 329 00:16:23,361 --> 00:16:26,361 Speaker 2: naturally you end up becoming creatures of habit. You go 330 00:16:26,441 --> 00:16:29,561 Speaker 2: to the places you feel safe in, and you go 331 00:16:29,641 --> 00:16:33,161 Speaker 2: to the same restaurants and do the same thing. And obviously, 332 00:16:33,441 --> 00:16:35,881 Speaker 2: you know, as football is, they're a bit creatures of habits. 333 00:16:35,921 --> 00:16:38,961 Speaker 2: So then they sort of fixate on routine and habit 334 00:16:39,041 --> 00:16:42,321 Speaker 2: and you know, but that was the moment that I 335 00:16:42,361 --> 00:16:45,721 Speaker 2: sort of looked and excuse me, you're not displaying kind 336 00:16:46,161 --> 00:16:49,041 Speaker 2: human like behavior to your son. Just use your manners. 337 00:16:49,561 --> 00:16:53,121 Speaker 2: He was literally had his mouth full. Just be kind, 338 00:16:53,521 --> 00:16:56,641 Speaker 2: teach your son to manners. Why can't I say that 339 00:16:57,761 --> 00:16:59,601 Speaker 2: because I don't come to your dinner table and when 340 00:16:59,641 --> 00:17:02,041 Speaker 2: you're like halfway through and saying putting something in your face, 341 00:17:02,081 --> 00:17:06,681 Speaker 2: saying you've got to sign this. Yeah, that's just disrespect. Yeah, 342 00:17:06,721 --> 00:17:10,041 Speaker 2: and they're not David Beckham, not that I would even 343 00:17:10,241 --> 00:17:12,840 Speaker 2: condone someone doing that, David Beckham. But you know what 344 00:17:12,880 --> 00:17:16,441 Speaker 2: I mean, your famous in Brisbane, but it's not stretched everywhere. 345 00:17:16,801 --> 00:17:18,640 Speaker 1: Is there like a sense of relief when you go 346 00:17:18,761 --> 00:17:20,721 Speaker 1: like overseas where he's not known as much. 347 00:17:21,160 --> 00:17:24,001 Speaker 2: Yeah, we tended to go to like holidays where I 348 00:17:24,041 --> 00:17:26,761 Speaker 2: think we went to Tazzi a few times with the girls, 349 00:17:26,801 --> 00:17:28,561 Speaker 2: and then we went back to the Middle East. We 350 00:17:28,561 --> 00:17:30,640 Speaker 2: went to Abu Dabby. We would tend to go to 351 00:17:30,681 --> 00:17:33,720 Speaker 2: Melbourne a lot. At that stage, Melbourne wasn't as huge, like, 352 00:17:33,761 --> 00:17:35,960 Speaker 2: so he wasn't noticed all the time, so it was 353 00:17:36,001 --> 00:17:37,921 Speaker 2: a little bit more like you could go out and 354 00:17:38,041 --> 00:17:40,241 Speaker 2: you might have like three quarters of the night where 355 00:17:40,281 --> 00:17:42,281 Speaker 2: you'd be cool and one person would you know, be 356 00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:44,880 Speaker 2: Queenslander and all the rest. I remember being like on 357 00:17:44,921 --> 00:17:48,361 Speaker 2: our first holiday together over in the States, we were 358 00:17:48,360 --> 00:17:52,921 Speaker 2: walking down what's called Boulevard, the Boulevard in La and 359 00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:55,640 Speaker 2: I remember thinking, Wow, this has been really nice, like 360 00:17:55,721 --> 00:17:58,521 Speaker 2: it's crazy, but you don't realize it until you don't 361 00:17:59,481 --> 00:18:03,280 Speaker 2: have it happening. And then this voice was screaming at 362 00:18:03,360 --> 00:18:07,200 Speaker 2: us down Hollywood Boulevard and was like, oh, I need Alfy, 363 00:18:07,441 --> 00:18:10,720 Speaker 2: like so excited. But at the same time, you're like, we're. 364 00:18:10,561 --> 00:18:13,401 Speaker 1: In America, man, is there a part of that that's 365 00:18:13,521 --> 00:18:17,360 Speaker 1: nice or for Sam? Yeah of course, yeah, okay, yeah, 366 00:18:17,521 --> 00:18:20,840 Speaker 1: I imagine that would be nice, Like, oh, he loves 367 00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:23,521 Speaker 1: it valid and you loved Yeah, of course. 368 00:18:23,600 --> 00:18:25,600 Speaker 2: I think he actually looks for it more these days 369 00:18:25,681 --> 00:18:27,761 Speaker 2: than he probably did when he was playing. 370 00:18:27,961 --> 00:18:31,240 Speaker 1: And how do you feel the minute you hear or 371 00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:34,720 Speaker 1: see someone about to come over for a photo or like, 372 00:18:34,761 --> 00:18:35,481 Speaker 1: I just walk away. 373 00:18:35,640 --> 00:18:38,721 Speaker 2: I don't look like that extra Harry, hang on, that's 374 00:18:38,761 --> 00:18:40,440 Speaker 2: like in the photo, Like I don't want to be 375 00:18:40,481 --> 00:18:40,920 Speaker 2: that person. 376 00:18:41,441 --> 00:18:46,001 Speaker 1: Yeah. More recently, you were working at a place called Rumble, 377 00:18:46,041 --> 00:18:50,321 Speaker 1: which is like boxing fitness yea, like a gym group fitness. 378 00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:52,840 Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah yeah, And I came to a class 379 00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:55,921 Speaker 1: of yours and I was blown away, like you were 380 00:18:55,921 --> 00:18:59,120 Speaker 1: in your element, you were amazing at it. And I 381 00:18:59,120 --> 00:19:01,840 Speaker 1: remember thinking, wow, like this is her thing, Like she's 382 00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:03,801 Speaker 1: so good at that. It was fitness, which you love, 383 00:19:03,840 --> 00:19:06,001 Speaker 1: but it was also there was an element of performance, 384 00:19:06,080 --> 00:19:10,000 Speaker 1: and it's just I was really impressed. And then that 385 00:19:10,201 --> 00:19:12,761 Speaker 1: came to an end. You lost your job there because 386 00:19:12,761 --> 00:19:15,640 Speaker 1: they went out of business, and I remember you telling me, 387 00:19:16,080 --> 00:19:18,641 Speaker 1: and my initial I was like, Oh, that's really sad. 388 00:19:18,681 --> 00:19:20,720 Speaker 1: I'm so sorry to hear that. But there was a 389 00:19:20,761 --> 00:19:22,960 Speaker 1: part of me that was like, oh, but she's all 390 00:19:23,001 --> 00:19:25,001 Speaker 1: right because Sam's got lots of work at the moment. 391 00:19:25,321 --> 00:19:28,961 Speaker 1: And it wasn't until that evening that I thought to myself, Wow, 392 00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:32,640 Speaker 1: why did I think that? Knowing everything that I know, 393 00:19:33,681 --> 00:19:39,881 Speaker 1: it gave you a sense of identity, a community, there's purpose, 394 00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:43,360 Speaker 1: there's an element of this is what I'm really good 395 00:19:43,360 --> 00:19:45,920 Speaker 1: at you And I sent you a message out evening 396 00:19:45,921 --> 00:19:48,481 Speaker 1: and I was like, ohe you're okay, and blah blah blah. 397 00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:51,001 Speaker 1: But that was a really big thing because I imagine lots 398 00:19:51,001 --> 00:19:53,561 Speaker 1: of people would think that, oh, she's fine, Sam's got 399 00:19:53,561 --> 00:19:56,041 Speaker 1: work on, he's on the TV whatever they're doing. 400 00:19:56,120 --> 00:19:56,400 Speaker 2: Fine. 401 00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:59,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, tell me about how that feels when you're a 402 00:19:59,681 --> 00:20:01,961 Speaker 1: human being wanting to do what you're good at and 403 00:20:02,041 --> 00:20:03,561 Speaker 1: doing stuff for yourself too. 404 00:20:04,160 --> 00:20:07,120 Speaker 2: I think there's still a portion of people that have 405 00:20:07,281 --> 00:20:10,360 Speaker 2: that perception that I actually don't even work, like even now, 406 00:20:10,681 --> 00:20:12,681 Speaker 2: you know, like my brother even made a comment once 407 00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:15,920 Speaker 2: was like, oh, rumble, you can't even call that work, 408 00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:20,120 Speaker 2: And you're like, what, You get up and take five 409 00:20:20,201 --> 00:20:23,561 Speaker 2: classes in a row, like five hour long performances from 410 00:20:23,561 --> 00:20:26,161 Speaker 2: four am to like ten am, and like you said, 411 00:20:26,160 --> 00:20:28,521 Speaker 2: like there was an element of performance in there. Absolutely. 412 00:20:28,721 --> 00:20:31,001 Speaker 2: I was not only running two sides of a class 413 00:20:31,041 --> 00:20:34,561 Speaker 2: for fifty minutes with up to forty people in a class, 414 00:20:34,801 --> 00:20:37,920 Speaker 2: but I was also djaying the amount of energy that 415 00:20:38,001 --> 00:20:41,080 Speaker 2: you would exert doing that. But then I have like 416 00:20:41,080 --> 00:20:42,961 Speaker 2: this large portion of people that go, you don't work, 417 00:20:43,041 --> 00:20:45,481 Speaker 2: You just look after the kids, and you're like, man, 418 00:20:45,880 --> 00:20:49,120 Speaker 2: at the end of the day, Sam wouldn't be doing 419 00:20:49,201 --> 00:20:54,880 Speaker 2: half the shit that he's doing without me doing everything else. 420 00:20:55,801 --> 00:21:00,041 Speaker 2: You know, shit doesn't get done without someone being the workhorse. 421 00:21:01,441 --> 00:21:04,881 Speaker 2: So yeah, it's moments in Sam's career that I look 422 00:21:04,880 --> 00:21:08,561 Speaker 2: at and go, fuck, I would love that you're ticking 423 00:21:08,640 --> 00:21:12,080 Speaker 2: every box that makes me happy, Like, look at this year. 424 00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:15,561 Speaker 2: This year's been stellar for him, Like he got to 425 00:21:15,640 --> 00:21:18,960 Speaker 2: go into the jungle for like what seven weeks, and 426 00:21:19,001 --> 00:21:20,561 Speaker 2: it would have been tough, don't get me wrong, Like 427 00:21:20,600 --> 00:21:23,240 Speaker 2: I think you lost twelve kilos, which was wonderful, and 428 00:21:23,281 --> 00:21:25,840 Speaker 2: then he won it. He's in a new country, he's 429 00:21:25,880 --> 00:21:28,921 Speaker 2: doing new things. The dopamine hits are coming in every day, 430 00:21:29,041 --> 00:21:32,880 Speaker 2: like you know. But in the background, he tells me 431 00:21:33,001 --> 00:21:35,161 Speaker 2: like two weeks out that he's going and he could 432 00:21:35,201 --> 00:21:38,080 Speaker 2: be gone for eight weeks. Then you've got the two kids, 433 00:21:38,441 --> 00:21:42,280 Speaker 2: then you've got house and mortgage and business, and like, 434 00:21:42,360 --> 00:21:47,321 Speaker 2: shit just doesn't stop when you go away. That doesn't 435 00:21:47,360 --> 00:21:49,480 Speaker 2: happen by itself, Katie, you know what it's like, Like 436 00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:53,880 Speaker 2: you're juggling, even juggling one child or more. It's tough. 437 00:21:54,801 --> 00:21:58,360 Speaker 1: Has there ever been a moment that you felt like 438 00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:00,121 Speaker 1: you're living your life for him? 439 00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:00,720 Speaker 2: Yeah? 440 00:22:00,801 --> 00:22:03,241 Speaker 1: And when I say that, I'm not saying that's Sam's 441 00:22:03,241 --> 00:22:04,001 Speaker 1: fault in any way. 442 00:22:04,041 --> 00:22:04,561 Speaker 2: No, it's not. 443 00:22:04,681 --> 00:22:08,400 Speaker 1: But the nature of it is, you're the product, you're 444 00:22:08,441 --> 00:22:11,001 Speaker 1: the king, and I'm living my life for you. 445 00:22:11,160 --> 00:22:14,321 Speaker 2: It's been that way since we got together. This is 446 00:22:14,360 --> 00:22:17,640 Speaker 2: a choice. Now, not every relationship works like this not 447 00:22:17,761 --> 00:22:20,801 Speaker 2: every footballer and footballer's wife. This is just Sam and 448 00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:24,240 Speaker 2: I and our journey right from grade eight through to 449 00:22:24,281 --> 00:22:28,041 Speaker 2: grade twelve. He was always the shiny, sparkly one, but 450 00:22:28,201 --> 00:22:30,321 Speaker 2: the shiny sparkly one would stand next to me. I 451 00:22:30,321 --> 00:22:33,081 Speaker 2: would write all of the speeches, I would deliver all 452 00:22:33,241 --> 00:22:36,120 Speaker 2: of the speeches, and then he would be the accolade. 453 00:22:36,761 --> 00:22:39,720 Speaker 2: And that's just been our dynamic. I chose to be 454 00:22:39,761 --> 00:22:42,400 Speaker 2: a part of that. And yeah, it's got me some 455 00:22:42,481 --> 00:22:45,640 Speaker 2: amazing things. I've got a few hairbags along the way. 456 00:22:46,120 --> 00:22:50,921 Speaker 2: I've got two beautiful kids that they're my everything, and yeah, 457 00:22:50,961 --> 00:22:53,721 Speaker 2: I have to thank him for that. You know, there's 458 00:22:53,761 --> 00:22:55,361 Speaker 2: a part of you when you start to go into 459 00:22:55,400 --> 00:22:58,761 Speaker 2: this identity crisis where you go like, ah, fuck, I've 460 00:22:58,801 --> 00:23:01,561 Speaker 2: given you everything, and what have I got now? Family, 461 00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:06,521 Speaker 2: a beautiful house. You know, the opportunities like as opportunities 462 00:23:06,561 --> 00:23:09,241 Speaker 2: that come with different things like meeting you and creating 463 00:23:09,241 --> 00:23:13,001 Speaker 2: a podcast, and that doesn't just happen. That comes from 464 00:23:13,041 --> 00:23:16,640 Speaker 2: opportunities of meeting people and you know, creating friendships and 465 00:23:16,681 --> 00:23:19,201 Speaker 2: doing all of that stuff comes off that and saying 466 00:23:19,241 --> 00:23:22,001 Speaker 2: that we took some really really shitty turns along the way, 467 00:23:22,041 --> 00:23:24,561 Speaker 2: which we lost a lot of money on because people 468 00:23:24,721 --> 00:23:27,761 Speaker 2: again are waiting there just like leeches, wanting to come 469 00:23:27,801 --> 00:23:29,761 Speaker 2: into business with me. Oh, this is a great idea 470 00:23:29,761 --> 00:23:31,681 Speaker 2: for you. You should do this and put money here. 471 00:23:31,721 --> 00:23:33,721 Speaker 2: And then they're just like raking it in because you've 472 00:23:33,761 --> 00:23:37,321 Speaker 2: got no idea what you're doing and you're entrusting in others. 473 00:23:38,120 --> 00:23:40,440 Speaker 2: But all they're saying is, oh, yeah, that's a Wrongcoast player, 474 00:23:40,721 --> 00:23:43,160 Speaker 2: Like we've fucked up so many times. Don't get me wrong. 475 00:23:44,041 --> 00:23:49,561 Speaker 1: I think there's an unfair assumption that for you it's 476 00:23:49,681 --> 00:23:53,640 Speaker 1: just all lovely and rosy and you know, got nice house, 477 00:23:53,721 --> 00:23:56,280 Speaker 1: got nice handbags, and you should just be happy with that. 478 00:23:56,721 --> 00:23:59,801 Speaker 1: How do you combat that stuff? So when you have 479 00:23:59,921 --> 00:24:02,921 Speaker 1: had those moments of feeling like you're the star, I'm 480 00:24:03,001 --> 00:24:04,881 Speaker 1: doing all of this and you're the one that gets 481 00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:08,960 Speaker 1: all the recognition and validation, I guess what do you 482 00:24:09,120 --> 00:24:12,601 Speaker 1: do to keep going and fill your bucket? 483 00:24:12,840 --> 00:24:15,600 Speaker 2: Well? I think after I got my postonator would just 484 00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:18,120 Speaker 2: say under control. Probably not. You know, I learned a 485 00:24:18,160 --> 00:24:21,121 Speaker 2: lot about myself in that year, and that was after Elsie. 486 00:24:22,120 --> 00:24:24,160 Speaker 2: I think I took a left turn to make sure 487 00:24:24,721 --> 00:24:27,521 Speaker 2: that I was doing something that brought me joy and 488 00:24:27,561 --> 00:24:30,680 Speaker 2: that filled my bucket, and that was movement. It's always 489 00:24:30,721 --> 00:24:33,360 Speaker 2: been a player throughout my whole life. I think it 490 00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:36,281 Speaker 2: would be that I would ensure that I was continually 491 00:24:36,360 --> 00:24:39,561 Speaker 2: learning something new about movement, what I could share with people, 492 00:24:39,761 --> 00:24:42,360 Speaker 2: and how I could help others be of service to 493 00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:45,241 Speaker 2: other people. And yes, that's the role that I play 494 00:24:45,241 --> 00:24:47,681 Speaker 2: at my household. I am a service to my children, 495 00:24:47,681 --> 00:24:51,441 Speaker 2: I'm a service to Sam. I play that role and 496 00:24:51,521 --> 00:24:54,081 Speaker 2: so then you know there's that next level of going, well, 497 00:24:54,201 --> 00:24:56,521 Speaker 2: I have to find some form of contentment and happiness 498 00:24:56,561 --> 00:25:00,041 Speaker 2: within that because I've chosen that. But that only happens 499 00:25:00,041 --> 00:25:02,400 Speaker 2: within myself. So you know, I had to do a 500 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:05,080 Speaker 2: lot of inner work like everybody in this today's So 501 00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:08,400 Speaker 2: I've got a really good therapist. I've got amazing friends 502 00:25:08,400 --> 00:25:10,680 Speaker 2: around me as support network that I can lean on 503 00:25:10,761 --> 00:25:14,561 Speaker 2: when I need to. Getting the ball rolling happens inside 504 00:25:14,561 --> 00:25:17,080 Speaker 2: of me. No one else can do it. That moment 505 00:25:17,120 --> 00:25:20,840 Speaker 2: of going it starts with me. I had to go 506 00:25:20,961 --> 00:25:23,240 Speaker 2: deep into that in order to find who I was, 507 00:25:23,321 --> 00:25:25,400 Speaker 2: and movement was a big part of that, which is 508 00:25:25,441 --> 00:25:29,041 Speaker 2: when I went back as a mature age student and 509 00:25:29,281 --> 00:25:31,920 Speaker 2: got my set three in sert four in fitness and 510 00:25:31,961 --> 00:25:34,840 Speaker 2: then became a PT and then there's been doubts all 511 00:25:34,880 --> 00:25:37,880 Speaker 2: the way along, like you doubt yourself continuously, like not 512 00:25:37,961 --> 00:25:40,400 Speaker 2: good enough. You know, I've got two kids, and what 513 00:25:40,481 --> 00:25:44,041 Speaker 2: have I got to offer people? I literally reinstalled what 514 00:25:44,120 --> 00:25:47,201 Speaker 2: I needed, which was movement. A movement makes my brain 515 00:25:47,281 --> 00:25:51,801 Speaker 2: work properly when I feel good about myself in that sense, 516 00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:54,400 Speaker 2: I think, you know, it makes you quite powerful and 517 00:25:54,441 --> 00:25:56,001 Speaker 2: you can do anything you want. But there was a 518 00:25:56,001 --> 00:25:58,600 Speaker 2: lot of soul searching in there. There still is because 519 00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:01,361 Speaker 2: after life of football is it's not what they make 520 00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:02,441 Speaker 2: it out to be. No. 521 00:26:02,961 --> 00:26:05,240 Speaker 1: I think also like what I see with you as 522 00:26:05,281 --> 00:26:10,400 Speaker 1: you surround yourself with very close, very normal friends that 523 00:26:10,521 --> 00:26:13,961 Speaker 1: you can trust, Like you go to the occasional ritzy thing, 524 00:26:14,041 --> 00:26:16,241 Speaker 1: but you're not doing recarpets every week. 525 00:26:16,321 --> 00:26:18,321 Speaker 2: But it's not my thing. Yeah, And I think it's 526 00:26:18,321 --> 00:26:21,440 Speaker 2: like really really like you've got to be true to 527 00:26:21,561 --> 00:26:25,240 Speaker 2: who you are and this ingenuine part of people like 528 00:26:25,481 --> 00:26:28,801 Speaker 2: I love this. Do you really what happens when you're 529 00:26:28,801 --> 00:26:30,840 Speaker 2: sitting in silence in your house? Can you do that? 530 00:26:31,880 --> 00:26:34,201 Speaker 2: Are you content with who you are within that silence? 531 00:26:35,241 --> 00:26:37,241 Speaker 2: Because it's all good to put like a big show 532 00:26:37,241 --> 00:26:40,400 Speaker 2: and dance on, but really in the background noise, like 533 00:26:40,441 --> 00:26:43,080 Speaker 2: when you uncover everything and you're sitting at home in 534 00:26:43,120 --> 00:26:45,761 Speaker 2: that silence of like one on one, are you still 535 00:26:45,801 --> 00:26:48,321 Speaker 2: a team? You know, that's that part all of us 536 00:26:48,360 --> 00:26:50,200 Speaker 2: can ask. But at the same time, yeah, I'd be 537 00:26:50,321 --> 00:26:53,281 Speaker 2: very ingenuine of me if I said I was doing 538 00:26:53,321 --> 00:26:56,120 Speaker 2: Red Carpets and I loved it every week. I don't. Yes, 539 00:26:56,201 --> 00:26:58,440 Speaker 2: I have a very big personality. You've seen it on 540 00:26:58,521 --> 00:27:00,760 Speaker 2: stage at Rumble, Like I can deliver when I have 541 00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:04,241 Speaker 2: to deliver, but really, deep down, like there's that little 542 00:27:04,281 --> 00:27:07,521 Speaker 2: introverted part of me that's just so happy to watch 543 00:27:07,561 --> 00:27:08,761 Speaker 2: other people do well. 544 00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:14,321 Speaker 1: Has there ever been a time And this is not 545 00:27:14,441 --> 00:27:17,561 Speaker 1: to do with yours and Sam's relationship, but I guess 546 00:27:17,640 --> 00:27:23,681 Speaker 1: the outside noise, fame, not having your identity where you've 547 00:27:23,681 --> 00:27:24,120 Speaker 1: gone this. 548 00:27:24,080 --> 00:27:27,121 Speaker 2: Is too much. There was a few through there, and 549 00:27:27,281 --> 00:27:30,520 Speaker 2: like it was probably during that whole like idea of 550 00:27:30,561 --> 00:27:32,840 Speaker 2: like chat about Postnator or chat about personnatal and you 551 00:27:32,840 --> 00:27:34,400 Speaker 2: tell your story and you tell your story and then 552 00:27:34,441 --> 00:27:36,240 Speaker 2: you're like, fuck, my kids are nearly big enough now 553 00:27:36,241 --> 00:27:40,121 Speaker 2: where they read the story. And then now we're at 554 00:27:40,120 --> 00:27:42,160 Speaker 2: that stage where I have to like recap on what 555 00:27:42,201 --> 00:27:45,001 Speaker 2: the story meant, and like there's some big things in 556 00:27:45,041 --> 00:27:47,200 Speaker 2: that story, like you're saying that you couldn't love your 557 00:27:47,281 --> 00:27:49,441 Speaker 2: child and you didn't know how to feel, and there's 558 00:27:49,561 --> 00:27:51,680 Speaker 2: those sorts of things that come with it. There's also 559 00:27:52,321 --> 00:27:56,281 Speaker 2: that inner workings of like everyone expects all the wives 560 00:27:56,321 --> 00:28:00,080 Speaker 2: to get along. I think I came in at a 561 00:28:00,120 --> 00:28:02,441 Speaker 2: really good time. They call them old boys and old girls, 562 00:28:02,481 --> 00:28:05,041 Speaker 2: but they're not really old. But I had a really 563 00:28:05,321 --> 00:28:08,441 Speaker 2: an older group of women when I first came into 564 00:28:08,441 --> 00:28:11,321 Speaker 2: the Bronx, and that was like players wives, but also 565 00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:15,521 Speaker 2: staff members wives, and then they had this Thoroughbreds group. 566 00:28:15,761 --> 00:28:18,761 Speaker 2: I met some really amazing wives. Then the playing roster 567 00:28:18,921 --> 00:28:22,801 Speaker 2: changes and incomes new, and incomes new and younger and 568 00:28:22,880 --> 00:28:26,680 Speaker 2: younger and younger, and then different dynamics folt right, and 569 00:28:26,721 --> 00:28:29,360 Speaker 2: I just sort of went, oh, yeah, and it's probably 570 00:28:29,360 --> 00:28:32,561 Speaker 2: not for me, Like I just didn't have to be 571 00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:35,360 Speaker 2: a part of a clique to feel that I was 572 00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:37,840 Speaker 2: a part of anything. Like I was there just watching 573 00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:40,121 Speaker 2: my husband do his job. That's as simple as it was, 574 00:28:40,161 --> 00:28:41,561 Speaker 2: and that's as much as it was to me. 575 00:28:43,041 --> 00:28:46,561 Speaker 1: It feels like you have never needed the attention. 576 00:28:46,921 --> 00:28:49,241 Speaker 2: No, I don't need that to make up who I am, 577 00:28:49,241 --> 00:28:50,960 Speaker 2: and the people that actually want to get to know 578 00:28:51,041 --> 00:28:51,681 Speaker 2: you will know you. 579 00:28:52,201 --> 00:28:57,961 Speaker 1: Yeah, what would you want people to know that have 580 00:28:58,481 --> 00:29:02,121 Speaker 1: this assumption that you've got this rosy perfect life and 581 00:29:02,241 --> 00:29:04,161 Speaker 1: you don't need to work because you're married to a 582 00:29:04,201 --> 00:29:08,521 Speaker 1: footballer haha, Or do not even care what they think. 583 00:29:08,561 --> 00:29:10,441 Speaker 2: There's a part of me that goes, I don't really 584 00:29:10,441 --> 00:29:13,361 Speaker 2: care what people think now, you know, deep down I 585 00:29:13,361 --> 00:29:16,401 Speaker 2: put on a big front, like I'm a big strong woman, 586 00:29:16,521 --> 00:29:18,881 Speaker 2: but sometimes I have like moments of like where I 587 00:29:18,961 --> 00:29:21,440 Speaker 2: drop my cape, but it's at the same time, like 588 00:29:21,481 --> 00:29:24,041 Speaker 2: I sort of look and go, you know, like anyone 589 00:29:24,081 --> 00:29:27,241 Speaker 2: it could be walking past and not knowing somebody's story. 590 00:29:27,521 --> 00:29:31,881 Speaker 2: Don't assume. Don't assume that you know someone's story. Ask them, 591 00:29:32,121 --> 00:29:34,480 Speaker 2: because every one of us on this earth has a 592 00:29:34,561 --> 00:29:37,601 Speaker 2: story and it's not defined by the person that they 593 00:29:37,641 --> 00:29:40,921 Speaker 2: choose to be married to or be in love with. 594 00:29:41,361 --> 00:29:43,681 Speaker 2: And yeah, we all make choices, we all fuck up, 595 00:29:44,361 --> 00:29:47,041 Speaker 2: we all have skeletons in the closet. We're human being 596 00:29:47,081 --> 00:29:48,801 Speaker 2: at the end of the day. It's part of the 597 00:29:49,121 --> 00:29:52,200 Speaker 2: roll call of being here on this earth. Maybe stop 598 00:29:52,201 --> 00:29:54,960 Speaker 2: assuming and just ask for the story. 599 00:29:56,041 --> 00:30:00,321 Speaker 1: In three words, what's it like being missus? 600 00:30:00,361 --> 00:30:08,481 Speaker 2: Thy day, busy, loved, very loved? And I would say 601 00:30:08,521 --> 00:30:13,601 Speaker 2: there's an element of lonely. Okay, there you go. 602 00:30:14,041 --> 00:30:15,881 Speaker 1: Do you ever wish you'd kept the name Evans? 603 00:30:15,961 --> 00:30:18,481 Speaker 2: Yeah? I did. We argued about it on and on 604 00:30:18,561 --> 00:30:22,001 Speaker 2: and on, and he was so entire. I just want 605 00:30:22,001 --> 00:30:24,601 Speaker 2: to stay Evans. I just want to be Joe Low 606 00:30:24,961 --> 00:30:27,201 Speaker 2: And it does. It comes with stigma, babe. It doesn't 607 00:30:27,201 --> 00:30:30,200 Speaker 2: come always with a positive stigma either. Yeah, oh you're 608 00:30:30,201 --> 00:30:35,361 Speaker 2: saying Friday's cousin, yeah, or that Oh you just think 609 00:30:35,401 --> 00:30:38,441 Speaker 2: that you deserve this school interview because your last name's Thirday. 610 00:30:40,321 --> 00:30:43,321 Speaker 2: What No, I just told you my name because you 611 00:30:43,321 --> 00:30:45,480 Speaker 2: asked me my name. Now you've created an assumption that 612 00:30:45,521 --> 00:30:50,601 Speaker 2: I deserve this. What the fuck is going on? Yeah? Yeah, 613 00:30:50,601 --> 00:30:52,521 Speaker 2: I wish I did. You just want to be you? Yeah, 614 00:30:52,561 --> 00:30:54,641 Speaker 2: I just want to be me. Thank you. 615 00:30:55,081 --> 00:30:59,001 Speaker 1: Thank you spoke so beautifully and I'm so glad, like 616 00:30:59,001 --> 00:31:01,841 Speaker 1: I've been waiting for that, and I know that I 617 00:31:01,921 --> 00:31:03,760 Speaker 1: didn't even give you a heads up of what we 618 00:31:03,761 --> 00:31:06,801 Speaker 1: were going to talk about today, let alone any questions 619 00:31:06,841 --> 00:31:08,601 Speaker 1: I was going to ask. So thank you for always 620 00:31:08,681 --> 00:31:09,521 Speaker 1: being so open and. 621 00:31:09,521 --> 00:31:13,361 Speaker 2: Honest pleasure, Absolute pleasure. Thanks for asking the right questions.