Speaker 1: The public has had a long held fascination with detectives.
Speaker 1: Detective see a side of life the average persons never
Speaker 1: exposed to. I spent thirty four years as a cop.
Speaker 1: For twenty five of those years, I was catching killers.
Speaker 1: That's what I did for a living. I was a
Speaker 1: homicide detective. I'm no longer just interviewing bad guys. Instead,
Speaker 1: I'm taking the public into the world in which I operated.
Speaker 1: The guests I talk to each week have amazing stories
Speaker 1: from all sides of the law. The interviews are raw
Speaker 1: and honest, just like the people I talk to. Some
Speaker 1: of the content and language might be confronting. That's because
Speaker 1: no one who comes into contact with crime is left unchanged.
Speaker 1: Join me now as I take you into this world.
Speaker 1: Welcome back to part two of my chat with Bill Edgar,
Speaker 1: known as a coffin confessor. He's the person that delivers
Speaker 1: messages at funerals at the requests of the deceased. And
Speaker 1: it's quite an interesting occupation that Bill's found himself in.
Speaker 1: If you listen to part one, you would have heard
Speaker 1: of Bill's life. I'll call it extraordinary. Bill. First of all,
Speaker 1: welcome back Part two.
Speaker 2: Thanks for having me.
Speaker 1: Quite extraordinary, And I say this is all honestly, what
Speaker 1: you went through tugs at the heart strings, and full
Speaker 1: credit to you for making something of your life and
Speaker 1: not letting those setbacks. And we're talking being abused as
Speaker 1: a child, sexually abused as a child, not letting those
Speaker 1: setbacks define you. But it has its impact. We left
Speaker 1: you in Part one as a seventeen year old fighting
Speaker 1: the system in Bogoo jail and doing what you needed
Speaker 1: to do to survive, and that included fighting and standing
Speaker 1: up for yourself and being stood over. How long did
Speaker 1: you do in prison?
Speaker 2: I went in on just after my seventeenth birthday and
Speaker 2: I came out just after my twenty first birthday. I
Speaker 2: sort of I'd do six months and remand for six months,
Speaker 2: and I'd do another six months, and then I'd be
Speaker 2: out for three months and then back in again, all
Speaker 2: on the same charges. Basically, the system was so broken
Speaker 2: back then as it is today. I guess is that
Speaker 2: you know I'd go to court and they'd go, look,
Speaker 2: he's got a six month sentence, but there is this
Speaker 2: outstanding crime that we're still investigating, and Bill Pots will
Speaker 2: go will investigate it, and they're going, oh, we haven't
Speaker 2: got time. Well let him out on bail, and then
Speaker 2: I'd be out on bail and then I'd be walking
Speaker 2: somewhere and the police had just arrested me and they
Speaker 2: thrown me back inside.
Speaker 1: Tough time. So four years were you still and you
Speaker 1: touched on how you met your wife Lara at school
Speaker 1: and even you can't even do that normally because it
Speaker 1: was there a school that you weren't actually meant to
Speaker 1: with tend Then you'd stolen the school uniform to go
Speaker 1: in the classroom and she happened to be sitting behind you.
Speaker 1: You can't make this shit up, Bill.
Speaker 2: And I dragged her in and out of my troubles
Speaker 2: and she stayed with me through all that. She'd come
Speaker 2: and visit me in Bogger Road. Then I got a pregnant.
Speaker 2: People were saying run, and I'm like, I love this girl.
Speaker 2: I'm not running.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: She bring the baby into and it was just a
Speaker 2: fucking what a woman. I mean, Jesus.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I would look at your resume and thinking not
Speaker 1: a lot going on here, But you've proved them all wrong.
Speaker 1: And so's Lara's love for you, and vice versa. So
Speaker 1: forty years it's a long, long time. You get out
Speaker 1: of JAF you're twenty one, what's life prospects for You're
Speaker 1: a father by this stage.
Speaker 2: I take it rick laying ruthing, you know, whatever I
Speaker 2: could do, you know, I worked at and I tried
Speaker 2: to better myself, and each job I had fucking couldn't
Speaker 2: work for anybody. I couldn't be told what to do.
Speaker 2: Is it just I am dyslexic? But I also have this,
Speaker 2: I have a processor. Everybody has a processor in their brain.
Speaker 2: Mind's slow, and I've learned that I can't react straight away.
Speaker 2: I have to think about it first and then react,
Speaker 2: and I've learned that and taught myself that. But when
Speaker 2: I was younger, I just react and then I'd think,
Speaker 2: you know, which was dumb, which is a lot of
Speaker 2: people do. Anyway, I ended up working whatever job I could,
Speaker 2: and the one job I found I was good at,
Speaker 2: which is the dumbest job, is a dorman, you know,
Speaker 2: and it's just a complete fucking nightmare of a job
Speaker 2: because you know, again you've got legalabies. And then I
Speaker 2: was working with people that were like we've touched on before,
Speaker 2: the royd raide should get to their head and I'd
Speaker 2: be like, I don't even like this type of thing.
Speaker 2: But anyway, I fell into nightclubs and I the owner.
Speaker 2: Is really funny because my wife and I we escaped
Speaker 2: to Cans. We said, let's just move, so we escaped
Speaker 2: to Cairns nineteen ninety one. By this time we had
Speaker 2: a little girl, so and she was one year old
Speaker 2: and my son was three or four year old. And
Speaker 2: we escaped to Cairns and I said to my wife,
Speaker 2: I said, I'm I'm going to work at a nightclub
Speaker 2: up here. It's really famous called the Playpen. It's a
Speaker 2: huge nightclub. I'm going to get myself a job there. Anyway,
Speaker 2: I rock up at this nightclub at six o'clock at
Speaker 2: night and there's a ladder that going right up to
Speaker 2: the roof, like OHI as and there's a guy right
Speaker 2: up at the top and he's changing light bulbs. And
Speaker 2: I look at him right up there, and there's a
Speaker 2: security guard, bouncer, story bloke holding the ladder. And I
Speaker 2: said to the security guy, I said, mate, looking for
Speaker 2: a job. He goes, no jobs here, I said, I said,
Speaker 2: who's the manager or the boss? And there he goes.
Speaker 2: That's him up there. I said, that's him up there
Speaker 2: and I look up and I say, are you're the
Speaker 2: manager of the boss. He goes, yeah, mate, I said,
Speaker 2: I need a job. Security dormant nah. I said, okay,
Speaker 2: you got too many. He says yeah. I said, how
Speaker 2: about I not this fucking broke out and then you
Speaker 2: give me a job because you've got nowhere to go.
Speaker 2: I said, oh, that's that's the option. So I said
Speaker 2: I need a job. I said, and I'm desperate. I
Speaker 2: had a wife, a couple of kids. We've just moved here,
Speaker 2: and this guy holding your ladder is your life support
Speaker 2: and I'm about to cut it. And I'd been in
Speaker 2: Ja I'd come out.
Speaker 1: So I was full of He knew how to talk
Speaker 1: the talk.
Speaker 2: And the bouncer looks at me and he goes, mate,
Speaker 2: I'll tear your head off. I said, you let go
Speaker 2: of that ladder. He's dead anyway. The boss up, Tobby, says,
Speaker 2: can you be back here at seven point thirty wear
Speaker 2: a white shirt, black pants, black shirts. I said, no,
Speaker 2: iris pow.
Speaker 1: That's a great job interview.
Speaker 2: I worked there for three and a half years on
Speaker 2: the door, and then the owner of the nightclub came
Speaker 2: in and he says, you're not a dorman. He says,
Speaker 2: you're a manager, coming, I'll train you. So I became
Speaker 2: a manager of the nightclub for a few years too.
Speaker 1: So it was great and that kept your way from
Speaker 1: falling back into old habits or getting yourself into trouble
Speaker 1: your manage.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know nightclubs. I could see all the trouble
Speaker 2: around me.
Speaker 1: Oh like that's tiptoeing through a minefield.
Speaker 2: Working absolutely. I had Lara, I had the kids, and
Speaker 2: I I was good at what I did. I was good.
Speaker 2: I'm a very good talker in that way. And the
Speaker 2: second weekend I was there, there's a big fight and
Speaker 2: I had no backup. They don't locked me out, they
Speaker 2: lock they locked the fucking door. I'm out the front
Speaker 2: and I'm punching on with this guy. I knew I was.
Speaker 2: I was. I was just hab it. All of a sudden,
Speaker 2: this paddy wagon come flying around the corner and it's
Speaker 2: a dog squad. Dog's going off and all the boy
Speaker 2: they hate dogs, and the copper gets out and he
Speaker 2: lets his dog out, and holy fuck, the dog's name
Speaker 2: is Ghost. I think I think it was a ghost.
Speaker 2: And he come out and everybody just fucking ran for it,
Speaker 2: and I'm standing there and I've got a bit of
Speaker 2: clar it over me, and the copper comes over and
Speaker 2: he goes, you're right man. I said yeah, I said,
Speaker 2: I said, they locked me out, and he says, yeah,
Speaker 2: that's protocol here in kens. You know, we just locked
Speaker 2: the clubs down. And I said, yeah, but they don't leave.
Speaker 2: The fucking bounces outside.
Speaker 1: It's not usually, that's not meant to be how it
Speaker 1: works exactly.
Speaker 2: So he injuries him as doug and him and I
Speaker 2: have become you know, we became close around. I still
Speaker 2: talk to Dougie today and he's been a copper for years.
Speaker 2: And it was just a situation that I ended up. Yeah,
Speaker 2: from from the streets, did yail, doing jobs, and then security,
Speaker 2: and then from then just just life got better.
Speaker 1: You talk about getting getting life's experience, so now you're
Speaker 1: getting You became a private investigator, and you explained that
Speaker 1: partly in Part one about doing a lot of finances
Speaker 1: and that type of stuff. You outlined to us your
Speaker 1: first job as a coffin confessor and what was done there.
Speaker 1: How did that business take off from that point because
Speaker 1: that was the one out thing. Did you was there
Speaker 1: a light bulb moment you think, hold, that's here's something
Speaker 1: that people might be wanting. How was it word of mouth?
Speaker 1: Did you advertise it? How did it grow?
Speaker 2: I when I left that first funeral, Graham's funeral, the
Speaker 2: young girl came up to me and that was his
Speaker 2: daughter and thanked me for it. And there was another
Speaker 2: young lady who came running over and she said, excuse me.
Speaker 2: She says, you need to see my auntie. And I'm
Speaker 2: like why, and she goes, she's impalliative care. This is
Speaker 2: the hospital. She's in northern New South Wales. She needs
Speaker 2: you really bad. I don't do like what will she
Speaker 2: need you know? And she goes, I'm not sure, but
Speaker 2: she needs you someone like you. It was to crash
Speaker 2: her funeral. And I went, you're fucking kidding me?
Speaker 1: What?
Speaker 2: She goes, my niece just told me that you crashed
Speaker 2: Graham's funeral. And she was the funeral on my behalf
Speaker 2: because I knew Graham and his family. I want you
Speaker 2: to do my funeral. Fuck. I left there and I
Speaker 2: went to a cafe and I sat at this cafe
Speaker 2: and I'm scratching my head and I'm looking at my phone,
Speaker 2: and then I thought, this is seriously, could this be
Speaker 2: a business? Maybe it could be. So then I thought,
Speaker 2: what I call myself? Who am I? What am I?
Speaker 2: What do I do? And I'm sitting there and going
Speaker 2: I stand in front of the coffin and I confess
Speaker 2: people's it's as deep as dark as secrets. So I
Speaker 2: guess I'm the coffin confessor. And it hit me and
Speaker 2: I went coffin confessor, Yeah, that's cool. And then I
Speaker 2: trademarked it, and then I painted it.
Speaker 1: What did the Arnie want done? At her funeral?
Speaker 2: She had a best friend for over forty years and
Speaker 2: they were wonderful, wonderful friends together. They both had family,
Speaker 2: so married with kids. But her secret was that she
Speaker 2: was in love with her best friend, passionately in love
Speaker 2: with her, and she could never tell her. After that
Speaker 2: was crashed and that was revealed, her best friend came
Speaker 2: over to me and said, I felt exactly the same way.
Speaker 2: I didn't know she felt like that.
Speaker 1: Oh that's sad, isn't it?
Speaker 2: Like the husband's come over and said, I knew. I
Speaker 2: told her so many times that she should fulfill her
Speaker 2: dreams and gain, but she was too scared about society,
Speaker 2: her family, and that she has to be married to
Speaker 2: a man and that. Yeah, it was very touching.
Speaker 1: Yeah that and I didn't expect that. But they're the
Speaker 1: type of moments, so special moments that you're uncovering. And
Speaker 1: like when you told me that, I'm thinking two people
Speaker 1: that are madly in love with each other, but they
Speaker 1: didn't tell each other until one of them died. It
Speaker 1: does make you think about the way you live your life,
Speaker 1: doesn't it. Where you see things like.
Speaker 2: That, Absolutely, it really does. It's changed my life immensely.
Speaker 1: Well, you know, I'll keep coming back at the weekend. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'll read Bill's book. But you made me think about
Speaker 1: a lot of lot of different things. And I suppose
Speaker 1: it's the very nature of a funeral is it's crunch time.
Speaker 1: You know, if it's not going to be said here,
Speaker 1: it's gone, you just you fade off into the distance.
Speaker 1: So yeah, that's what happens. You've had a and we'll
Speaker 1: talk obviously more on the Coffin Confessor, but you've had
Speaker 1: which is a resounding success, but you've had a couple
Speaker 1: of other business ideas that haven't been as good Coffin camping.
Speaker 1: Let's just talk through the mindset there. I'm on a
Speaker 1: roll here, coffin confessor. Okay, we can go further, we
Speaker 1: can go coffin camping. Okay, give us the insight in
Speaker 1: your thought process there. And what happened.
Speaker 2: I was getting hundreds, if not thousands of emails requests
Speaker 2: for meetings and to talk to the not to crash
Speaker 2: their funerals, just to meet me. I said to my wife,
Speaker 2: I said, look, you know, we've got twelve acres. I'm
Speaker 2: going to use an acre down the back of the
Speaker 2: forest and I'm going to set up a camping situation
Speaker 2: down there. And she goes, oh, yeah, what time, And
Speaker 2: I said, coffin camping. I'm going to have four coffins
Speaker 2: designed beautifully in this nice area, and I'm going to
Speaker 2: do it on a nice and professional and she goes, as
Speaker 2: long as it's nice and not tacking. I said, yeah,
Speaker 2: it'll be nice, it'll be beautiful. And I got my
Speaker 2: heart set on it, and I started doing it and
Speaker 2: I got into it and I had it all set
Speaker 2: up beautifully, and then I contacted he made of mine
Speaker 2: who's in the media, and I said, listen, I said,
Speaker 2: what I want you to do, no media, I just
Speaker 2: want you to come down with your wife and spend
Speaker 2: a night in the coffins at coffin camping and he's like,
Speaker 2: oh fuck yeah, he says, I'm me in. He said.
Speaker 2: The wife won't be, but I've got to mate and
Speaker 2: we'll bring a six pack. I said, no, no alcohols
Speaker 2: and food and our coals included. I said, just down.
Speaker 2: So he rocks downright. Unbeknownst to me, he brings a
Speaker 2: fucking film crew. Right. It comes down and the four
Speaker 2: of them end up staying the night in this coffin,
Speaker 2: and the coffins are really nice. I'm talking like, it's
Speaker 2: really well set up. I'm there having a fire and
Speaker 2: a beer and talking with them and having a good time.
Speaker 2: Then all of a sudden, I go and I leave
Speaker 2: them to it. In the morning, I go see them
Speaker 2: and I said, I'll say Darryl's his name. It's not
Speaker 2: I said, Darryl. You know, Like, what'd you think? He said,
Speaker 2: I'll be all. He said, that was the most cathartic
Speaker 2: experience I've ever had in my life. That was fucking unbelievable.
Speaker 2: I said, yeah, did you have the lid open or closed?
Speaker 2: He says, I closed it. He said, Terry over there
Speaker 2: wouldn't fucking close his I said, and cathartic. He says, oh, mate,
Speaker 2: it really made me think about you know, death, life
Speaker 2: and everything in between. And I said, oh, that's cool.
Speaker 2: That's good to know. He says, And so we shot
Speaker 2: a movie this morning about it. I said, what. He says, Yeah,
Speaker 2: we shot a little movie and we sent it through
Speaker 2: to Sunrise David Kosh.
Speaker 1: He said, yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he says, they're going to be here tomorrow. I'm like,
Speaker 2: fuck off. So anyway, Yeah, they arrive and they do
Speaker 2: the story. That was it, That was the beginning. In
Speaker 2: the end of coffin Camp. Everybody that come past my
Speaker 2: property will yelling out coffin confessor, Hey god, yeah. They
Speaker 2: were taking photos videos that were fucking laying in the
Speaker 2: coffins that ah fuck, I did it at the wrong place.
Speaker 1: My place, just not in your own own home. I
Speaker 1: just as you're describing that, I'm thinking, and I hadn't
Speaker 1: even thought, Okay, sleep in the coffin you put the
Speaker 1: lid down, saying it's cathartic. I would imagine it would
Speaker 1: be because if you're laying in there, you're thinking, is
Speaker 1: this how it all ends? And then you would reflect
Speaker 1: on your life.
Speaker 2: And I had each one had an iPad so they
Speaker 2: could talk to each other.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, they'd be handy, make going a little bit
Speaker 1: nicer if you could see die sleeping, stay in contact.
Speaker 1: You put yourself through that once yourself did, and you
Speaker 1: spend a night in a coffin just to get feel
Speaker 1: for it.
Speaker 2: I did, and it is a cathartic experience. It's yeah, well,
Speaker 2: I tell you what. It's not for everyone, but for
Speaker 2: those that you've got to experience it because it is.
Speaker 2: It's something different. And I don't mean like it's just
Speaker 2: you know, like I had a group of ladies come out.
Speaker 2: Four ladies, bring out their bottles of wine and their champagne,
Speaker 2: and they're all sitting around the campfire, and then all
Speaker 2: of a sudden, they're all sitting in their individual coffins,
Speaker 2: and the coffins are in individual rooms, and so they'd
Speaker 2: be sitting up in the coffin having wine and they're
Speaker 2: all talking to each other, chatting and carrying on, having
Speaker 2: a great time, and then you know, you hear their
Speaker 2: stories in the morning. One lady says, I just cried
Speaker 2: myself to sleep, you know, because I was thinking of
Speaker 2: my mum and dad and they were in a coffin
Speaker 2: and then I was. Another lady says, that's it. It's
Speaker 2: made my mind up, and being cremated. It had all
Speaker 2: different effects on different people, so it was pretty cool
Speaker 2: in that respect.
Speaker 1: It's bizarre, isn't it. And I wonder why, And yeah,
Speaker 1: I was a homicide detechnic for so long, so I'm
Speaker 1: thinking about about death. But reading your book just sort
Speaker 1: of it really brings it home because the funeral is
Speaker 1: a funeral, and normally you go to a funeral, you
Speaker 1: prepare yourself for the funeral, depending on who it is.
Speaker 1: You go there, you feel the emotions, you walk away
Speaker 1: and try and move on with life. But what you
Speaker 1: talk about here sort of it dangles it in front
Speaker 1: of people and you've got to look at it, process it.
Speaker 2: Well, that's it. I mean, I'm responsible and I love it,
Speaker 2: and I do I get off on it a little
Speaker 2: bit that I'm responsible for having the whole world talk
Speaker 2: about death in a different light. Now.
Speaker 1: You also another interesting story, and it leads into one
Speaker 1: of the jobs you get as a coffin confessor. The
Speaker 1: bloat that he was worried how his family were going
Speaker 1: to react after he passed away, and they're a bit greedy,
Speaker 1: and he decided to ask a favor of the coffin confessor,
Speaker 1: not for the eulogy, but to bury some stuff under
Speaker 1: his coffin. Do you want to talk us through that story,
Speaker 1: because you also just and I don't want to paint
Speaker 1: you as a weirdo, but you also laid in the
Speaker 1: bottom of a dugout gravesite looking up and just looking
Speaker 1: at the sky to get a sense of what it
Speaker 1: felt like. Talk us through that one. Well, I like
Speaker 1: your sense of adventure.
Speaker 2: Look, this gentleman who had engaged me vultures in the
Speaker 2: family mate. He had them in spades, and they say,
Speaker 2: you can't take it with you when you go, you
Speaker 2: just go. Well, this bloke took it with you, you know,
Speaker 2: his possessions, his money and everything else. He wanted to
Speaker 2: take it with him, or he wanted it buried where
Speaker 2: no one would ever find it. And I said, okay,
Speaker 2: I'll try and find a place. And he said, well,
Speaker 2: burn all the cash. And I'm like, I could do
Speaker 2: that turn until I realized that it's illegal. But you
Speaker 2: can wrap it up tight and keep it concealed and
Speaker 2: bury it somewhere. That's not a problem. So to the
Speaker 2: life of me. I had no idea where I was
Speaker 2: going to plant this thing, and I thought I'd put
Speaker 2: it in my own garden and put a tree on
Speaker 2: top of it and just plant it there. And that
Speaker 2: was it until I was at another funeral and I
Speaker 2: went ding, I'm going to jump in his grave. I
Speaker 2: going to dig a hole put it there. I'll wait
Speaker 2: for the funeral, and when the coffin goes on top,
Speaker 2: my job's done. So I ended up going to the
Speaker 2: cemetery and I saw the guy in the backo that
Speaker 2: was digs the graves and I asked him to lower
Speaker 2: me down, and he's like, and I told him the story,
Speaker 2: told him what I do. I didn't tell him what
Speaker 2: I was going to do down there. I'm an investigator.
Speaker 2: I wanted to look at graves. That was basically my
Speaker 2: story for him, and he says, ah, he says, he said,
Speaker 2: what's in it for me? Like everybody, I got a
Speaker 2: couple hundred bucks and he goes, yeah, sure, not a problem.
Speaker 2: I said, okay, So I gave him a couple hundred bucks.
Speaker 2: He lowers me down. I'm six foot one. There's no
Speaker 2: fucking way that was six foot under. I'm telling you
Speaker 2: it was like eight ten feet.
Speaker 1: So we got that wrong. It's send foot one.
Speaker 2: Anyway, he lows me down and I'm standing at the
Speaker 2: bottom and he's put the bucket back up. He yells
Speaker 2: out and he says, I'll be back in a minute,
Speaker 2: and I said, yeah, no, worries great, because I'm going
Speaker 2: to dig a hole. The little little bag I had,
Speaker 2: I had like this. It wasn't a screwdriver. It's a chisel.
Speaker 2: And I took that purposely because I knew the ground
Speaker 2: might be hot. It turns out I didn't need a
Speaker 2: big hole. And I thought, how I'm digging away, digging
Speaker 2: away anyway. I bury this thing, get it all in,
Speaker 2: and I'm standing there. This guy in the back is
Speaker 2: the only fucking person in the world that knows where
Speaker 2: I am. And I'm standing there and I'm looking around,
Speaker 2: and I just noticed the colors of the dirt change,
Speaker 2: you know, as you dig deeper and deeper. And I
Speaker 2: look up and the clouds are gone by, and I'm thinking, fuck,
Speaker 2: he's taking a while. And then I just sat down
Speaker 2: and then I lay down and it was you know,
Speaker 2: it wasn't wet, but it was damp. It felt that
Speaker 2: way and I just lay there and I'm I'm looking
Speaker 2: up and I'm watching all the clouds go past, and
Speaker 2: I'm thinking, fuck if I'm going to be bury and
Speaker 2: these neighbors dudes creepy. And then yeah, he comes back
Speaker 2: and he as a bucket and I get out and
Speaker 2: I went, job done, you know, But I had to
Speaker 2: wait until a few hours for the funeral. And then
Speaker 2: the funeral was done, and then they lowered the casket
Speaker 2: and then and then I started filling it in. The
Speaker 2: bacco driver says, oh, do you want to help fill
Speaker 2: it in? Is you made of yours and all this?
Speaker 2: And I said no, but I'll just if you don't mind,
Speaker 2: I'll just watch it till the end.
Speaker 1: Okay, So that was that was his way of dealing
Speaker 1: with the greedy, greedy family.
Speaker 2: Yeah, big time. So I've probably got families out there going. Okay.
Speaker 2: My grandfather was in his eighties. He was buried around
Speaker 2: this area. We might have to the grave and find
Speaker 2: out where all his shit is.
Speaker 1: Looking at what motivates people to engage you? And I'm
Speaker 1: just pulling out a couple of observations or quotes from
Speaker 1: the book. That rare that you meet someone who's entirely
Speaker 1: motivated by revenge. So I think you make the point
Speaker 1: revenge offers no solace at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: but burdening does. So that's not so much about revenge,
Speaker 1: it's about unburdening. And there's another quote we've got here
Speaker 1: from your book. We've all met people you'd fucking never
Speaker 1: want to talk to again and maybe who you'll hate forever.
Speaker 1: Does that mean you should take revenge on them. No,
Speaker 1: it just means you should let it go and move
Speaker 1: on again. This type of words of wisdom from the
Speaker 1: book I didn't expect, but yeah, it's fairly poignant what
Speaker 1: you're saying there, Like, if you hang on to the
Speaker 1: desire for revenge and anger, it's going to destroy you
Speaker 1: and you're better off to let it go. You've seen
Speaker 1: more people than most people would get to see coming
Speaker 1: to the end of their lives. It's got a story
Speaker 1: to tell you. What's your observation of the best way
Speaker 1: to deal with the shit that you carry in your
Speaker 1: life coming close to the end?
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, and you don't even have to be
Speaker 2: close to the end. I think I think I put
Speaker 2: it down to a cleansing, And this is what happened
Speaker 2: to me after doing the job for so long now,
Speaker 2: and I know more people dead than a life. So
Speaker 2: I got rid of all the shit in my life,
Speaker 2: the baggage to this day when I said, I still
Speaker 2: speak to my police mate Douggie in that, but I
Speaker 2: do not have a friend in the world that I
Speaker 2: can find today and just go for a coffee or
Speaker 2: a beer with because I don't carry other people's baggage.
Speaker 2: I've got enough baggage in my own and I don't
Speaker 2: carry people's baggage. But I think it's a cleansing. I
Speaker 2: think I downsized everything. I became more permanent to the
Speaker 2: life that I want to live, as in we all
Speaker 2: live dying, but very few of us die living, and
Speaker 2: I'm going to die living. Revenge anger, all those type
Speaker 2: of things that you hold on to against somebody that
Speaker 2: isn't holding onto anything towards you is a fucking total
Speaker 2: waste of time. Because I am a great believer in karma,
Speaker 2: they're going to fuck up themselves or at the end
Speaker 2: of the day, as I've always said, everyone dies everyone.
Speaker 1: I look at such simple, simple things and I'm laughing
Speaker 1: there because yeah, I'm going to get revenge on this person,
Speaker 1: And we've all been there in that position where the
Speaker 1: person hasn't even given you a second thought, and you've
Speaker 1: become obsessed with that person that I'm going to do this,
Speaker 1: I'm going to do that, and that person for them,
Speaker 1: they're too dumb to realize how much have upset you.
Speaker 1: Why waste your time on that. I was listening at
Speaker 1: a university graduation and they had a person delivering a keynote,
Speaker 1: a doctor that worked in palliative care. Most of his career,
Speaker 1: spent decades in palliative care, so I saw a lot
Speaker 1: of people pass and because of the nature of his work,
Speaker 1: people had often come up to him and say, this
Speaker 1: is what he was delivering the speech, what's the best
Speaker 1: way to die? And he stood there and he answered
Speaker 1: answered the question. He said, what I tell people is
Speaker 1: to have a good death, have a good life. That's
Speaker 1: the best advice I could give to you. I took
Speaker 1: something away from that that I didn't expect. What's your
Speaker 1: thoughts on that? Is that a good philosophy in life
Speaker 1: for a good death, have a good life.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean that's a saying and that's something that
Speaker 2: can resonate with people. My thought is is you know,
Speaker 2: people will ask me what the meaning of life is,
Speaker 2: and I truly believe the meaning of life is to
Speaker 2: avoid death. It's the meaning of life is you've got
Speaker 2: to avoid death. My personal thoughts is after doing what
Speaker 2: I do is to prepare for death. And I don't
Speaker 2: mean funeral plan or any of that shit. I mean
Speaker 2: to prepare for your own death or the death of
Speaker 2: a loved one close to you. That doesn't mean you're
Speaker 2: not going to mourn and grief. It just means be
Speaker 2: prepared because it can happen at any fucking time, right,
Speaker 2: and time will just come and take you. Death has
Speaker 2: no care or consequence, you know, it's just there. So
Speaker 2: I have this thing where I just say to people,
Speaker 2: you know, prepare just and once you prepare and you
Speaker 2: accept it, because we're all going there, it's going to
Speaker 2: fucking happen. Every person on the planet's got a skeleton
Speaker 2: in the closet. So if you're prepare for it, all
Speaker 2: of a sudden, you're become enlightened and you don't give
Speaker 2: a fuck about it because you know it's going to happen,
Speaker 2: like it's part of life. So yeah, that's what I think.
Speaker 2: I think. Prepare there for it.
Speaker 1: Okay, nursing homes and the pain you've seen there. You've
Speaker 1: seen a lot of people that have been there in
Speaker 1: nursing homes. And I know in your book, and I'm
Speaker 1: not the saying things out of school, you say, I'm
Speaker 1: not going to go down that path. I don't want
Speaker 1: to live in that where the care is not the
Speaker 1: stand that should be. That type of thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And it's sad because some of the cares are
Speaker 2: so beautiful, beautiful people, but they're being driven out because
Speaker 2: of the workload. I couldn't do what they do because
Speaker 2: I don't think I've got a heart big enough. But
Speaker 2: their heart gets ripped apart because they're told constantly to
Speaker 2: look after these two people. Then no, there's another two
Speaker 2: over there on the dementia unit needs another help. And
Speaker 2: they're just being overrun and driven out of the system,
Speaker 2: leaving the poor people that are in there to fend
Speaker 2: for themselves. Basically, it's a horrid system, absolutely horrid. And
Speaker 2: I met a couple in their eighties that engaged me
Speaker 2: and they will be taking their own lives because of
Speaker 2: that reason.
Speaker 1: Is that the couple that want their ashes spread around
Speaker 1: their lawns. You met on a walk one morning.
Speaker 2: A total walk. I have a car that is quite
Speaker 2: it's a focal point wherever it goes to this car
Speaker 2: and the number plate is Coffin Confessor. We started talking
Speaker 2: and lo and behold they told me their story, and
Speaker 2: then I went back to their place a couple of
Speaker 2: days later and we spoke extensively about what they've got
Speaker 2: planned and how they were going to do it, and
Speaker 2: it's methodical everything. It's amazing how they've planned it. And
Speaker 2: they don't want me to help in any way.
Speaker 1: Okay, so you're not complexit in it. You can't do
Speaker 1: anything about it.
Speaker 2: I'm just delivering a message after they're gone.
Speaker 1: There's another one when we talk about a talk about
Speaker 1: people with a greed of people, and it's more in
Speaker 1: keeping with your work as a private investigator. But there
Speaker 1: was one particular lady that met these or soon to
Speaker 1: be a deceased lady in a store and she befriend
Speaker 1: her and then made a claim on her will for
Speaker 1: six figure summon. You did some inquiries about it, found
Speaker 1: out it was all bullshit. She hardly had anything to
Speaker 1: do with her, but was just trying to steal the
Speaker 1: money from the estate.
Speaker 2: This happens so often. Just bullshit, you know. I got
Speaker 2: a week ago, I met a gentleman that lost his
Speaker 2: wife and he put an ad in the paper for
Speaker 2: someone to rent a room out. The lady that's renting
Speaker 2: the room, oate, is in her fifties and has put
Speaker 2: an engagement ring on her hand and told everybody that
Speaker 2: she's engaged to the bloke. She phoned up the police
Speaker 2: and she said that it was abusive. The police have
Speaker 2: come and removed him from his house and she's now
Speaker 2: ransacked and he's not allowed back at his house for
Speaker 2: six months.
Speaker 1: Just oh, speechless. As ridiculous as it sounds, I can
Speaker 1: see how that's happening. If you've got people and I
Speaker 1: saw this in the Cops when I was in the cops,
Speaker 1: if they got no morals or no principles whatsoever, they're
Speaker 1: very hard to deal with. Like that is just so
Speaker 1: shameful what that person has done. But they don't care.
Speaker 1: They're frauds. Is they haven't got a conscience.
Speaker 2: As a PI and I've worked for many years with
Speaker 2: some some fucking ruthless people. I've got to say those
Speaker 2: type of people, if they tell a lie and they
Speaker 2: believe in the lie. It's not a lie.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you can't shame them, can you. They just I
Speaker 1: locked up all types of people for different different crimes,
Speaker 1: but the frauds has always used to get me. Like
Speaker 1: I still remember early days as a detective going to
Speaker 1: a place and this couple they just moved from state
Speaker 1: to state. They'd rent a place, hire all this furniture,
Speaker 1: get a SPA installed, like whatever they wanted, but not
Speaker 1: pay for a thing, enjoy it for six months before
Speaker 1: it all caught up on them. I remember when we
Speaker 1: locked them up. We had to hire trucks to come
Speaker 1: and take all the stolen gear that they had in
Speaker 1: their place. But no shame whatsoever, Like it wasn't you've
Speaker 1: just done that, We see your next time, shameful. You
Speaker 1: get some other interesting ones that There was the lady
Speaker 1: that found herself in Palliatiff Care. She'd lost her husband
Speaker 1: years before, and she had something at home that she
Speaker 1: didn't want her family finding in the draw so she
Speaker 1: discreetly I think she had a name for it, called
Speaker 1: it call it something. Just wanted someone that could discreetly
Speaker 1: go and pick this item up from the drawer beside
Speaker 1: a bed and dispose of it without her family finding it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, she tested me, that lady. She said to me,
Speaker 2: I was engaged through the palliadiff care nurse and I
Speaker 2: went and saw this lady and she said, look, I've
Speaker 2: got some documents and I got some items. They're hidden
Speaker 2: in the roof cavity going there and if you can
Speaker 2: bring them to me. And I was like, no problem
Speaker 2: at all. And I fulfilled that job. There wasn't an issue,
Speaker 2: you know. And she was very grateful on that. And
Speaker 2: I got to talking and she found out the honesty
Speaker 2: and the trust that we had, and she said, look,
Speaker 2: I have an embarrassing item. She says, you've been married
Speaker 2: for some time. I know who you are, and you know,
Speaker 2: done a little bit of talking in the nurses, you know.
Speaker 2: And she says, and you are a good looker. She says,
Speaker 2: So I want to be able to be a bit
Speaker 2: honest with you. And I'm like, okay, what would you like?
Speaker 2: And she goes, I need you to remove Clive And
Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, I didn't see anybody there or anything there.
Speaker 2: Have you got an animal? I didn't know? Cat dog?
Speaker 2: Who's Clive? You know? And she goes, look, Clive's my
Speaker 2: closest dearest friend since my husband left. And I'm like, okay,
Speaker 2: I said, and where do I find Clive? And she says,
Speaker 2: he'll be in my drawer beside the bed. But he's
Speaker 2: actually got a bit of velcrow to him, so he's
Speaker 2: stuck it up under the drawer. So as well, Clive
Speaker 2: is obviously a sexual toy. Is that right? And she goes,
Speaker 2: I don't like to talk like that, and I'm like okay.
Speaker 2: She goes, but yes, I said, So I'm to get
Speaker 2: Clive and bring him back to go. Oh god, no,
Speaker 2: don't bring him here that. She said, I want him destroyed,
Speaker 2: and I said, not a problem. I said, I'll feel
Speaker 2: myself collecting him, bagging him and then putting him in
Speaker 2: the furnace. And she goes, oh, that'd be perfect a furnace.
Speaker 2: What a way to go. So it was a testing time.
Speaker 2: I go back to the house and yeah, I find
Speaker 2: exactly where Clive is and I'm like, holy fulk. Clive
Speaker 2: ain't no small little man either, you know. I take
Speaker 2: Clive and they do exactly what she wants done, and
Speaker 2: I send her the video and she's elated. Everything's happy,
Speaker 2: you know, And she was very upset and a bit
Speaker 2: of shame that her daughter may have found it. You know.
Speaker 1: That was Yeah, but like that must bring you some
Speaker 1: joy stuff like that, and it's a funny story and
Speaker 1: there's absolutely no judgment there, but you can We've all
Speaker 1: got these little secrets. We go, oh, that might be
Speaker 1: embarrassing all this and something that you could bring that
Speaker 1: and put a smile on the face.
Speaker 2: It's just people, you know, and we have certain things
Speaker 2: that we feel a little bit ashamed of. But it's
Speaker 2: not since it's not dirty, it's not you know, And
Speaker 2: like I always say, you know, if we don't do,
Speaker 2: if we don't sin, Jesus died for nothing.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, you're not religious, but you consider yourself spiritual
Speaker 1: and you talk about karma and all that. So you
Speaker 1: don't believe in one particular religion, but you believe in
Speaker 1: something out there.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I have this thing that religious people are terrified
Speaker 2: of going to hell. Spiritual people have already been there.
Speaker 2: And I look at it in a way that you know,
Speaker 2: I see things differently to a lot of people. I
Speaker 2: said earlier in the podcast that I had a gift
Speaker 2: with sport. Any sport I did I was not good at.
Speaker 2: I was great and I mean really good. And it
Speaker 2: wasn't until I turned thirty that I learned to read, write,
Speaker 2: and spell. Was thirty three that I found that I
Speaker 2: had a gift with numbers. I had no idea that
Speaker 2: it was even a thing, but I had a gift
Speaker 2: with numbers, could say things differently, and that's why I
Speaker 2: became a private investigator in the finance world. So you know,
Speaker 2: those type of things. And it's a gift that I
Speaker 2: say that I have, but I don't say it's from
Speaker 2: God or something like that. I say that I'm Yeah,
Speaker 2: I definitely have a belief in something. I mean, we
Speaker 2: can't just live then die and then nothing. I mean,
Speaker 2: obviously we live and what we leave behind being our children, grandchildren,
Speaker 2: whatever it is, is a legacy, which is great. You know,
Speaker 2: if death ends life, what the fuck end's death?
Speaker 1: Yeah? How does that go? It's interesting that you talk
Speaker 1: about it. Then again, because of the work that you
Speaker 1: do when you've seen so much death and so many funerals,
Speaker 1: but also not just seeing death, but getting the opportunity
Speaker 1: to speak to people prior to death and they're revealing
Speaker 1: their most intimate thoughts and secrets secrets to you. So
Speaker 1: you do definitely have an insight that other people wouldn't.
Speaker 1: You've been challenged a few times with jobs, and one
Speaker 1: in particular, one where the blokes us to see you
Speaker 1: had stuff that he wanted passed on. His death was imminent,
Speaker 1: and it turned out he'd sexually assaulted his nieces and
Speaker 1: wanted you to deliver a message to them. Given what
Speaker 1: happened to you as a child, that must have been
Speaker 1: a difficult situation to find yourself in and full of
Speaker 1: mixed emotions sitting down talking to a bloke like that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was sitting face to face with a pedophile,
Speaker 2: and I didn't know that until I'd arrived and sat
Speaker 2: with him and started talking. Nor did I know that
Speaker 2: he was actually a student at the Southport School and
Speaker 2: he knew all about me. It was a moment that
Speaker 2: ty started to you know, all your senses go off,
Speaker 2: and then all of a sudden he confesses that he
Speaker 2: was at TSS, he knows the lost boy of TSS,
Speaker 2: he knows who I am. And then all of a sudden,
Speaker 2: I'm like, I had so much rage as well, But
Speaker 2: at the same time, I'm being very, very professional, and
Speaker 2: I want to grab this guy's throat and have his
Speaker 2: eyes pop out, and he gives me these letter letters
Speaker 2: to give to his nieces, and I'm like, they're just
Speaker 2: going to fucking tear them up or burnham. They don't
Speaker 2: give a fuck mut you know. But I wouldn't say
Speaker 2: that to him. But you know, I'm there in the
Speaker 2: capacity of a coughing so I've got to put all
Speaker 2: my shit aside, and i got to do a job,
Speaker 2: you know, as confronting as it was the beautiful part
Speaker 2: for me. And i know it sounds morbid or whatever else,
Speaker 2: but he's dying. He's going to go meet his maker,
Speaker 2: whoever it is, you know. And I've always said that,
Speaker 2: you know, when people die, my focus, my point of view, sorry,
Speaker 2: is that there is no heaven, no Hell. We all
Speaker 2: go to the same place. And it used to ship
Speaker 2: me when I'd hear somebody like, come, you hear somebody
Speaker 2: get raped and murdered and that person then gets shot
Speaker 2: and killed, and they go, oh, he's going to hell,
Speaker 2: and that poor girl's gone to heaven. And I'm sitting
Speaker 2: there going, no, They're all going to the same fucking place.
Speaker 2: But anyway, I like that.
Speaker 1: It also touched on the fact of how disrespectful it
Speaker 1: is where you see a religious funeral that means nothing
Speaker 1: to the deceased. And we've all been to those funerals,
Speaker 1: and I think you reference in the book one where
Speaker 1: the person delivering the service couldn't even remember the deceased name.
Speaker 1: I've sat in many a funeral where it's all about
Speaker 1: the religion and someone's on their soapbox, but nothing about
Speaker 1: the person that's been buried than the person that's been buried,
Speaker 1: as far as I knew, had nothing to do with
Speaker 1: religion anyway. I think what you deliver is something more
Speaker 1: personal at the funeral, as confronting as it might be
Speaker 1: to some people in the congregation. What's your thoughts on that?
Speaker 1: Do you think it is a more personal way that
Speaker 1: someone from the actual decease is leaving a message. Oh?
Speaker 2: Absolutely. And look at the end of the day, when
Speaker 2: I walk into a church and I have to disrupt
Speaker 2: a church service because my client was an atheist and
Speaker 2: did not ruin religious funeral, and most of the people
Speaker 2: there knew he didn't want a religious funeral, is beyond belief,
Speaker 2: and out of respect for the mom and dad, I've
Speaker 2: had to say, Look, if you respect your son, you
Speaker 2: wouldn't go ahead with this, but you are going ahead
Speaker 2: with it, so I'm here to stop it on behalf
Speaker 2: of your son, and the minister of the church will
Speaker 2: go to interrupt, and I'll say to him straight up,
Speaker 2: to repent is to repeat. And that's all this institution
Speaker 2: fucking is is people come and they repent what they
Speaker 2: did last week, only to repeat it again next week.
Speaker 2: Now fuck off, sit down, shut up, I'm taking the
Speaker 2: coffin or I'm going to do this service his way,
Speaker 2: not your way.
Speaker 1: How do you protect yourself with You get it in writing,
Speaker 1: You record the request from the deceased, so you've got
Speaker 1: documentation there supporting, supporting the fact. Have you ever just
Speaker 1: walk into the wrong funeral stand up and you just
Speaker 1: get carried out or have you ever had those.
Speaker 2: I've had a nightmare of attending the wrong funeral. Most
Speaker 2: of the crowd want to hear what they love one
Speaker 2: have to say, so they'll shout the other ones down.
Speaker 2: So that's not not an issue at all. I Mean,
Speaker 2: everybody's there for one reason, and it's supposed to be
Speaker 2: to mourn the deceased and hear what their life story.
Speaker 2: So what's better than hearing it actually from them?
Speaker 1: Fascinating Obviously the business can continues on, but do you
Speaker 1: get foodback from people? If you had people reach out
Speaker 1: to you and thank you for what you did at
Speaker 1: the service, I think it reflects the passing of Harry
Speaker 1: or whoever it was very well.
Speaker 2: I don't, I don't. I refuse to open those emails
Speaker 2: or read them or talk to anybody. It's not about them.
Speaker 2: It was all about my client. I don't keep in
Speaker 2: touch with anybody. I've had people feelm me and then
Speaker 2: try and sell the film. You know, I'm like, you know,
Speaker 2: but again I'm very quick. I go in, do what
Speaker 2: they do, and I leave and by time they get
Speaker 2: their phones out, they're like, it's over. The fuck was
Speaker 2: that guy?
Speaker 1: And when you know what comes across, you've got to
Speaker 1: working as a bounce of being a kid in an
Speaker 1: adult prison. You've got the street smarts. You can read
Speaker 1: the crowd, you can read a look. You get a
Speaker 1: sense of where you can push. But yeah, I can
Speaker 1: just imagine how you're feeling before you walk in. You're
Speaker 1: probably becoming more and more accustomed to it. But you
Speaker 1: raise the word ethics a lot during the talk and
Speaker 1: a lot in the book, and it comes out there
Speaker 1: was an approach by a daughter that wanted you to
Speaker 1: get up at her father's funeral and say that he
Speaker 1: abused her, and you brought your private investigator skills to
Speaker 1: the table and you needed something more than just one
Speaker 1: person's word. Do you want to talk us through that
Speaker 1: or a similar type of situation.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so I can't, and I won't be engaged by
Speaker 2: a third party. I can only be engaged by the
Speaker 2: person you know, whose story it is and who's going
Speaker 2: to die or not even close to death. But it's
Speaker 2: about them. I can't. You know. I've had a lady say, look,
Speaker 2: you know I want you to crash my husband's funeral. Well, no,
Speaker 2: I need your husband to engage me. So I won't
Speaker 2: do it on behalf of anybody except for those you
Speaker 2: know that need my services directly. And I do that
Speaker 2: purely because the investigation is to look into their claims.
Speaker 2: When the person I'm supposed to crash for is laying
Speaker 2: on his deathbed and I can't get two words out
Speaker 2: of him, I mean I can't do it. So as
Speaker 2: an investigator, I do like to look at the claims
Speaker 2: this particular lady you're talking about, I believe, you know,
Speaker 2: like most of the world today. We all have mental
Speaker 2: health issues, you know, and it's a sad thing. But
Speaker 2: this lady had them in spades where she and I
Speaker 2: got to say she was abuse, she was attacked, but
Speaker 2: it was her husband. And it finally came out that
Speaker 2: she hated her father for not stopping her husband from
Speaker 2: attacking her. She blamed her her father again. Her father
Speaker 2: didn't engage me, so it wasn't going to happen anyway,
Speaker 2: but she was a bit upset about that. And I mean,
Speaker 2: I've had a multitude of people that call me names
Speaker 2: and are offensive and abusive because I won't crash their
Speaker 2: relatives sooner, and I said, oh, if their relative can
Speaker 2: engage me, then I'll do it.
Speaker 1: It makes a lot of sense. I could see it
Speaker 1: all crashing and burning and ending in tears if you
Speaker 1: didn't have that moral compass that you hold tight to.
Speaker 1: How you go there? What about the way it's taken off?
Speaker 1: You've gone from okay, Bill Edgar, and then all of
Speaker 1: a sudden, you're doing interviews around the world and everyone's
Speaker 1: fascinated by what you're doing. Talk us through that, because
Speaker 1: that's life changing in itself.
Speaker 2: Oh, it's incredible. I mean I get a call at
Speaker 2: two o'clock in the morning from a guy in America,
Speaker 2: you know, who's an agent for a lawyer for Oprah
Speaker 2: and all these people you know. And he's dropping names
Speaker 2: and he's talking and he's real America and I'm going
Speaker 2: to be your agent. I hung up on him, thanks
Speaker 2: me back, and he goes, no one ever thinks I
Speaker 2: hung up again. Third time he calls back and he goes, okay, okay, okay,
Speaker 2: I get it. I get it. I know I know
Speaker 2: about you. I know you. I just listen to me
Speaker 2: for a couple of minutes. So I listened to him,
Speaker 2: and he says, just do some research on who I
Speaker 2: am and what I'm capable of, and we can we
Speaker 2: can become good friends. Look, I really assure you that this,
Speaker 2: and I know you're investigator, so please just look at that.
Speaker 2: And so I looked into him, and I purposely waited
Speaker 2: three days, and I've got a couple of emails that
Speaker 2: i'd never opened. Sometimes you can open an email and
Speaker 2: they can see that you've opened it. I didn't take
Speaker 2: any text or calls or anything. And I really looked
Speaker 2: into this guy, and he was Chicago based and he's
Speaker 2: a real Chicago boy, you know, and his family, you know,
Speaker 2: the mobster elite. And he's a lawyer, very well known,
Speaker 2: I very well respected lawyer as well, you know. So
Speaker 2: I phone him up two o'clock his morning, Steve, and
Speaker 2: he goes, yeah, yeah Bill. Bill. I said, yeah, good mate.
Speaker 2: I said, look, as my agent, this is what you
Speaker 2: can look after me for, you know. And he's like, oh,
Speaker 2: that's so terrific. I'll send you a contract and I said,
Speaker 2: no worry. So he sends over this contract and I
Speaker 2: phone him up and I say, are you you're right
Speaker 2: with this contract? Ah, I said, I've just shown up
Speaker 2: my lawyers and they're saying that, are you comfortable. Oh, Bill,
Speaker 2: I'm a multi million I'm very comfortable. I'm really comfortable
Speaker 2: with it. It's not about the money, he says. I
Speaker 2: just lost my mama and I've got family that are
Speaker 2: on their death and I've been watching you and I've
Speaker 2: seen some videos. Man, you're it. You're one of a coin.
Speaker 2: There's no one like you in the world and your
Speaker 2: mine and I'm like, okay, cool. So yeah, he's been
Speaker 2: my agent for the last couple of years and he's
Speaker 2: been going around and he doesn't have to do much.
Speaker 2: People google it and go, holy fun.
Speaker 1: Well it is amazing because I remember when I first
Speaker 1: heard about you, it was exactly the same thing. He
Speaker 1: what he did this? Or yeah, just amazing. Is there
Speaker 1: a tell me if you can't? But is there talk
Speaker 1: of any film rights or anything about the story.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So I signed with Paramount to start with. Now
Speaker 2: I working with Hollywood is not fun as much as
Speaker 2: people might think it is. It's not what I do
Speaker 2: in life is. I'd like to keep what I own.
Speaker 2: I don't sell anything. It's my integrity, it's my story
Speaker 2: in my life. Once you sign, you lose everything. They
Speaker 2: own everything, and sure they pay you for it, but
Speaker 2: the money's not not your story anymore, and it's not me.
Speaker 2: It wasn't for sale. So Paramount sort of came back
Speaker 2: and forth and I said, look, no, it's not for sale.
Speaker 2: Then all of a sudden, another company come forward from
Speaker 2: Canada and England. They said, look, we want to do it.
Speaker 2: A television series, a documentary, a reality show. We want
Speaker 2: to do all these things over the next couple of years.
Speaker 2: What do you think? First up, I said I want
Speaker 2: to own it, and they said, yeah, it's yours. We
Speaker 2: want to license it from you. I went beautiful and
Speaker 2: to this day we have an Australian producer. There's people
Speaker 2: all over the world that are working collaboratory on all
Speaker 2: this and it's been Yeah, it's really exciting to watch
Speaker 2: what they're doing.
Speaker 1: Full credit to you, and it is exciting. I'm genuinely
Speaker 1: happy for you. It's amazing what's gone on your life
Speaker 1: these days. Describe your life, your personal life. Still madly
Speaker 1: in love with that woman that you annoyed it as
Speaker 1: a teenager.
Speaker 2: I look io my life, so yeah, yeah, I'm madly
Speaker 2: in love with her. She had a very bad accident
Speaker 2: a couple of years ago on the horse. We have horses,
Speaker 2: and the horse crushed her from the waist down and
Speaker 2: she's she learnt to walk again, which is absolutely Great's
Speaker 2: she has dropped foot and issues with hips and stuff,
Speaker 2: and she's she's disabled in that capacity. But you know what,
Speaker 2: You've got to be proud of her. She got back
Speaker 2: on the fucking horse and she's riding around now and
Speaker 2: she does everything that I think I rubbed off on her.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, two spirited people, and maybe it was meant
Speaker 1: to be. When she told you to stop leaning back
Speaker 1: on your chair and a bit a ticker on a
Speaker 1: bit of front. That's a bloke I'm going to marry,
Speaker 1: as seeing at school first time she's seen you. It
Speaker 1: must have been a good style of a bloke back then.
Speaker 2: Life today though, I mean, we have a hobby farm,
Speaker 2: We've got twelve acres. It's just a nice lifestyle. Works
Speaker 2: comes and goes. I still I'm true to myself. I don't.
Speaker 2: I always say, and even Lara says the same thing.
Speaker 2: If I was in my twenties thirties and this happened,
Speaker 2: I'd probably go nuts and bizarre, you know, and just
Speaker 2: but because and I am. I'm in my fifties and
Speaker 2: I enjoy it.
Speaker 1: I love it. You're quite right, like if this came
Speaker 1: to you too early, you would have blown it. You
Speaker 1: would have got caught up in your own heuber and
Speaker 1: just importance.
Speaker 2: And yeah, yeah, And that's what I keep telling myself.
Speaker 2: It's not about me, it's about them. If I keep
Speaker 2: the integrity and I keep doing what I do in
Speaker 2: the professional factor of being all for the client, nothing
Speaker 2: should go wrong. And if I protect myself well with
Speaker 2: the contracts of videos and everything else. I mean, I
Speaker 2: felt to certain people that you know, the media overseas
Speaker 2: in America have said, oh, we want to talk to
Speaker 2: a couple of the clients' families, give us their details.
Speaker 2: And at first I did that once they hounded her,
Speaker 2: you know, so I don't do that anymore. I don't know.
Speaker 1: You learn, you learn learn with those type of things,
Speaker 1: and you've got to protect those people who have put
Speaker 1: their trust in you and different things. Now there's we're
Speaker 1: starting to run out of time. But there's one thing
Speaker 1: I'm going to ask you about because you freak me
Speaker 1: out in your book a lot I was enjoying. You
Speaker 1: feel needed to feel pain, so you went to the dentist.
Speaker 1: Just let me describe what I remember from this part.
Speaker 1: You went to the dentist. You had seven feelings that
Speaker 1: had the old ol minim feelings and you wanted them
Speaker 1: replaced with porcelain. I get that, but you want it
Speaker 1: all done at the same time and without any anesthetic.
Speaker 1: What motivated that is that? Well, talk us through it.
Speaker 2: I have this thing. I have a very high pain tolerance,
Speaker 2: and to feel pain is to feel alive for me.
Speaker 2: I believe that comes from the trauma and everything I experienced,
Speaker 2: because I find it hard to feel pain I have
Speaker 2: the feelings of empathy and sympathy and you know, and
Speaker 2: love and all that, and it's not very often. It
Speaker 2: used to be often, because I'd go out and just
Speaker 2: get bashed up and I'd stand there and laugh because
Speaker 2: I'd enjoy it, because I'd go like, I'm alive, you know.
Speaker 2: And just recently it was not long ago that it
Speaker 2: came to me, and it came to me in a wave,
Speaker 2: and I had to feel pain, but I didn't want
Speaker 2: to hurt anybody, and I just I went to the
Speaker 2: dentist and I convinced her that, you know, this is
Speaker 2: what I needed to do. If anything goes wrong, it's
Speaker 2: not on you. I signed it disclosure and everything. And
Speaker 2: she's she started and I tell you, tooth by tooth,
Speaker 2: She's like she was crying in pain, and she's like,
Speaker 2: are you okay, And I'm like, I'm fine, just keep going,
Speaker 2: don't stop. And it was I tell you, there's no
Speaker 2: more pain than getting your teeth file drilled dug out
Speaker 2: without an aesthetic.
Speaker 1: I'm sitting here cringing, cringing. Now I'm not going to
Speaker 1: say I understand you with the teeth. You're going to
Speaker 1: drag me into the dances, but I understand it, and
Speaker 1: you do boxing. Sometimes I say to people, if I'm
Speaker 1: in mental state or whatever, it just feels good to
Speaker 1: be hit because it makes you feel alive. I would
Speaker 1: have just done four teeth. I wouldn't have done seven.
Speaker 2: You know what, when she was halfway through, I just
Speaker 2: couldn't stop just doing more, you know.
Speaker 1: And yeah, I look and pain. It was told to
Speaker 1: me like pain. It comes up like a triangle and
Speaker 1: it gets to the point where that's the extreme part.
Speaker 1: It can't get any worse. Sit there and take it.
Speaker 1: So there is ways of ways of dealing with the pain.
Speaker 1: Look wrapping up, I just want to say a couple things.
Speaker 1: I don't think we lose the importance of the messaging
Speaker 1: that you put out with survivors of child's sexual abuse
Speaker 1: and the impact it has and hearing your story. People
Speaker 1: should listen to it and what we talk about. Anyone
Speaker 1: that knows about these type of crimes going on and
Speaker 1: doesn't do anything, they should be as complicit as a
Speaker 1: person inflicting the crimes. The fact that you got through
Speaker 1: your life. And when I say, because I'm choosing my
Speaker 1: words not to say you turned it round because you
Speaker 1: didn't have a choice which direction it was going in.
Speaker 1: It was just pointed you in the direction said good luck.
Speaker 1: But you're doing some positive stuff and your spirit and
Speaker 1: your tenacity comes through. But also you delved into an
Speaker 1: area that I didn't think you could touch on so
Speaker 1: many people's lives. But I read this book hard Ass
Speaker 1: Homicide Detective, and it made me start thinking about death
Speaker 1: and life. So you're here onto something and yeah, I
Speaker 1: just like to congratulate you on the way that you've
Speaker 1: lived your life and the things that you're achieving.
Speaker 2: Oh thanks, make it means a lot, really does. I mean,
Speaker 2: you know, touching people the way I do is just yeah,
Speaker 2: it's an amazing feeling. And you know at the start
Speaker 2: of the book when I say, you know I was
Speaker 2: looking for the man that I really was. You know,
Speaker 2: I saw him in my reflection, was standing right in
Speaker 2: front of me. I just couldn't see him until I
Speaker 2: became a grandparent. Look out for all the success and
Speaker 2: you've got. So this is this is your second book,
Speaker 2: The Afterlife Confessional. You've got a third book coming out. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm planning on the third book. I don't think I'm
Speaker 2: ever going to run out of stories because everyone's going
Speaker 2: to die.
Speaker 1: What's your funeral going to be like? Just finishing off?
Speaker 2: Yeah, look, I'm not having a funeral. I've my whole
Speaker 2: family knows that I'm to be cremated, thrown in the ocean,
Speaker 2: followed by a bottle of port, have a nice dinner
Speaker 2: and a chat and a thought about me, and that's it.
Speaker 2: That's it for me, beautiful. But there'll be a secret
Speaker 2: that'll come out in hologram.
Speaker 1: Now now you're talking that's exciting. Well, I won't say
Speaker 1: I look for it. Hopefully it's a long time down
Speaker 1: the track. But look, thanks very much, Bill, thanks for
Speaker 1: taking the time. I know you're busy, and I've really
Speaker 1: enjoyed the chat.
Speaker 2: Gary has been wonderful. Thanks so much, mate.
Speaker 1: Cheers. Well, that was a two hour chat I had
Speaker 1: with Bill Edgar, and I've got to say it felt
Speaker 1: like ten minutes. He's got such an interesting life story
Speaker 1: and what happened to him as a child that shouldn't
Speaker 1: happen to anyone, and the stories of going into a
Speaker 1: male adult prison as a seventeen year old, it's just
Speaker 1: quite chilling. And then you've got the aspect of what
Speaker 1: he does as a coffin confessor, and i've got to
Speaker 1: say it's given me a different perspective on life and death.
Speaker 1: And that's saying something coming from a homicide detective. But
Speaker 1: I found him really interesting to chat with and quite frankly,
Speaker 1: quite inspiration