1
00:00:00,480 --> 00:00:04,800
Speaker 1: Good champs, Welcome to another installment, The Year Project. Craig Anthony, Harper, Bradley,

2
00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:09,800
Speaker 1: I'm going to go, Kevin, Patrick, Bryan mckipna. I've got

3
00:00:09,800 --> 00:00:11,559
Speaker 1: no idea. Do you have a middle name?

4
00:00:12,280 --> 00:00:13,920
Speaker 2: Yes? I do?

5
00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:15,120
Speaker 1: Does it start with a vow?

6
00:00:16,520 --> 00:00:17,880
Speaker 2: No? Oh?

7
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:18,880
Speaker 1: All right, what is it?

8
00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:23,400
Speaker 2: Well, it's not that like. I'm not going to make

9
00:00:23,440 --> 00:00:27,520
Speaker 2: it that easy for you. It starts with well, i'll

10
00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:30,680
Speaker 2: tell you, I'll tell you, I'll tell you the letter.

11
00:00:30,720 --> 00:00:34,680
Speaker 2: It starts with all right, yep, you will get it

12
00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:36,120
Speaker 2: in the first couple of guesses.

13
00:00:36,720 --> 00:00:42,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, starts with ah, Bradley Robert.

14
00:00:42,159 --> 00:00:45,240
Speaker 2: Yep, well done. Yeah.

15
00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:47,280
Speaker 1: You know you know how when you put names together,

16
00:00:47,320 --> 00:00:50,400
Speaker 1: you're like, yep, yeah, it wouldn't have been Bradley Ryan

17
00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:54,200
Speaker 1: or Bradley fucking Richard because that yeah, Bradley, Robert, Bradley

18
00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:58,000
Speaker 1: Robert actually like Craig Anthony. I'm not a fan of Craig,

19
00:00:58,040 --> 00:01:00,680
Speaker 1: but anyway, but Craig Anthony kind of goes together. Bradley

20
00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:05,120
Speaker 1: Roberts goes together. So Ron and Mary my parents. You

21
00:01:05,160 --> 00:01:09,440
Speaker 1: could have done better, but Brad's parents. Well done. Anyway,

22
00:01:09,480 --> 00:01:12,039
Speaker 1: that's it. That's the You project. Everyone will be back tomorrow.

23
00:01:12,040 --> 00:01:12,959
Speaker 1: Thanks Brad, it's.

24
00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:16,560
Speaker 2: Been great, it's been bambulous, great mate.

25
00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:17,200
Speaker 1: How are you?

26
00:01:18,240 --> 00:01:23,280
Speaker 2: Yeah? Really good. I was actually just thinking today before

27
00:01:23,280 --> 00:01:25,640
Speaker 2: we recorded this, the last time I was on the

28
00:01:25,640 --> 00:01:27,479
Speaker 2: You Project.

29
00:01:28,120 --> 00:01:32,360
Speaker 1: Well, my friend, I don't know is the answer to that.

30
00:01:32,440 --> 00:01:34,759
Speaker 1: But I'm going to tell you, which might come as

31
00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:37,520
Speaker 1: something of a surprise. This is terrible to do in

32
00:01:37,560 --> 00:01:40,400
Speaker 1: real time, but fuck it. That's just how we roll

33
00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:43,520
Speaker 1: here at the U Project because it's not radio. So

34
00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:47,080
Speaker 1: today is episode one eight, So today we are up

35
00:01:47,080 --> 00:01:49,800
Speaker 1: to So you and I will be one eight, one four.

36
00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:56,080
Speaker 1: So yeah, eighteen hundred and fourteen episodes in and I

37
00:01:56,080 --> 00:01:59,160
Speaker 1: would say you and I were, I would say lower

38
00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:02,520
Speaker 1: than five. Have you done? How many of you done? One? Two, three?

39
00:02:02,520 --> 00:02:03,440
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's been a while.

40
00:02:03,480 --> 00:02:04,680
Speaker 2: I think about three.

41
00:02:05,360 --> 00:02:08,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I would say it would have been more

42
00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:10,520
Speaker 1: than two years ago, more than two years ago.

43
00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:14,880
Speaker 2: But anyway we are. You're back, and I mean it's.

44
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,320
Speaker 1: Very hard to get to you because you have that

45
00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:19,320
Speaker 1: front line of defense, what with with all your people,

46
00:02:19,520 --> 00:02:23,000
Speaker 1: you know, your agents or the money people, the fucking

47
00:02:23,120 --> 00:02:26,320
Speaker 1: the terms of agreement, there's so many forms. I mean,

48
00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:29,919
Speaker 1: you don't make it easy for us little shitkickers to access.

49
00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:33,480
Speaker 2: You do you know you have my number. You can

50
00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:37,239
Speaker 2: call and I will answer every time. I have my

51
00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:41,040
Speaker 2: partner who I do some work with, and we have

52
00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:47,280
Speaker 2: our cat and our cat. I suppose if Muffin is

53
00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:52,560
Speaker 2: our manager, she does the negotiating. She's gorgeous, she's tough.

54
00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:56,000
Speaker 1: She's tough. She's also she doesn't pick up the phone either,

55
00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:57,919
Speaker 1: so you know, but I'm not offended.

56
00:02:58,440 --> 00:03:00,560
Speaker 2: No, she finds that quite difficult.

57
00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:05,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, even if she does, she generally doesn't say much.

58
00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:08,840
Speaker 1: Everybody's just tuned out and jumped up. No come back.

59
00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:12,480
Speaker 1: How have you really been? Are you well? Are you phisic?

60
00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:15,760
Speaker 1: Let's start with your mind and your heart and your body?

61
00:03:15,800 --> 00:03:16,720
Speaker 1: How are those things?

62
00:03:17,200 --> 00:03:21,920
Speaker 2: Well, mine's really really good. Heart is really good, as in,

63
00:03:24,360 --> 00:03:26,040
Speaker 2: you know, a lot of love for a lot of

64
00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:29,840
Speaker 2: things going on right now. After you know, the great

65
00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:32,400
Speaker 2: shame worn passed away. I probably, like a lot of people,

66
00:03:32,480 --> 00:03:34,800
Speaker 2: I went and did my heart test and jumped on

67
00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:37,360
Speaker 2: the treadmill and there was a little weight to get

68
00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:41,440
Speaker 2: in and cardiologists I think he referred to it as

69
00:03:41,440 --> 00:03:45,520
Speaker 2: the shame worn effect, which you know, so many of

70
00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:50,920
Speaker 2: us around that mid stage of our lives getting checked.

71
00:03:50,960 --> 00:03:53,280
Speaker 2: But no, my heart's all good. My heart's all good

72
00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:57,840
Speaker 2: and physically probly last time we spoke carrying a couple

73
00:03:57,880 --> 00:04:00,200
Speaker 2: extra kilos.

74
00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:03,960
Speaker 1: He's still For those who don't know, Brad and I

75
00:04:04,040 --> 00:04:08,200
Speaker 1: met at Harper's The Wonderful World of I think we

76
00:04:08,240 --> 00:04:10,440
Speaker 1: met there. We didn't meet before that, did we? No,

77
00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:15,200
Speaker 1: we met there, And yeah, Brad used to train up

78
00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:16,920
Speaker 1: at one of my gym's for a very long time.

79
00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:18,400
Speaker 1: Do you still hit the gym?

80
00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:23,520
Speaker 2: No? No, I was trying to sort of just soften

81
00:04:23,600 --> 00:04:24,760
Speaker 2: the block. But no.

82
00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:27,760
Speaker 1: You know, it's like when people haven't been for like

83
00:04:27,839 --> 00:04:30,720
Speaker 1: eight years and they're like, look, you know, not that often,

84
00:04:30,839 --> 00:04:33,520
Speaker 1: not as often as I should. No, not for the

85
00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:37,800
Speaker 1: last eight years. So never, fucking never is the answer.

86
00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:43,839
Speaker 2: Yeah, pretty much. But but but I do. I still

87
00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:47,039
Speaker 2: enjoy swimming. In fact, I think I might go for

88
00:04:47,080 --> 00:04:48,040
Speaker 2: a swim a bit later.

89
00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:51,839
Speaker 1: What's the thing that for you? Because you're quite a

90
00:04:51,839 --> 00:04:58,080
Speaker 1: deep and philosophical chap and what's the thing that for

91
00:04:58,240 --> 00:05:02,160
Speaker 1: you the protocol or the process or the thing that

92
00:05:02,240 --> 00:05:04,719
Speaker 1: grounds you, that calms you, that gets you in a

93
00:05:04,760 --> 00:05:08,479
Speaker 1: really good place mentally and emotionally quicker than anything else.

94
00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:19,320
Speaker 2: That's interesting that's interesting. As simple as it sounds, breathing,

95
00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:24,560
Speaker 2: it's a few breaths every time I do it, like

96
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:28,839
Speaker 2: it goes from being a cloudy world to a sunny

97
00:05:28,880 --> 00:05:39,280
Speaker 2: world in seconds. Yeah, seconds. Music exercise. When I say exercise,

98
00:05:39,680 --> 00:05:42,120
Speaker 2: given that you pointed out that I don't get to

99
00:05:42,160 --> 00:05:47,680
Speaker 2: the gym a lot like never, I just I love

100
00:05:47,760 --> 00:05:51,520
Speaker 2: to walk. I love to walk, and I don't always

101
00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:54,159
Speaker 2: listen to music because I do enjoy listening to the

102
00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:58,400
Speaker 2: sounds around me. I really enjoy that. But when I've

103
00:05:58,400 --> 00:06:01,520
Speaker 2: got an idea, I'm working a project on a project,

104
00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:06,360
Speaker 2: and you know, I'll so on some of my seventies

105
00:06:06,480 --> 00:06:10,880
Speaker 2: eighties sort of hits, and I really enjoy that. And

106
00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:14,440
Speaker 2: the other thing that And I probably spoke about this

107
00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:18,599
Speaker 2: last time and correct me if I did or didn't,

108
00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:22,880
Speaker 2: but you know, I was being able to research into

109
00:06:22,920 --> 00:06:25,479
Speaker 2: this recently. Have I spoken to you before about the

110
00:06:25,560 --> 00:06:26,600
Speaker 2: power of kindness?

111
00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:32,520
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, but I mean definitely worth revisiting.

112
00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:35,839
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, you know, people can, they can look it up.

113
00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:41,640
Speaker 2: But the reality is, you know, being kind to people

114
00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:46,760
Speaker 2: is more powerful than most people realize. And Martin Seligman,

115
00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:49,960
Speaker 2: who's the head of positive Psychology at pen University, in

116
00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:52,920
Speaker 2: the US. Have a look online. There is his quote

117
00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:57,280
Speaker 2: of all the things they've tested, the single most effective

118
00:06:57,320 --> 00:07:02,360
Speaker 2: way to momentarily in somebody's well being lift they're well

119
00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:06,200
Speaker 2: being is an act of kindness. And he's not just

120
00:07:06,279 --> 00:07:09,640
Speaker 2: talking about you know, someone falls over in the supermarket,

121
00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:11,880
Speaker 2: you pick them up, you help them, they feel great,

122
00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:14,400
Speaker 2: You feel great because you've helped it. He's actually talking

123
00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:17,480
Speaker 2: about everyone that he is about it or witnesses it.

124
00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:21,640
Speaker 2: So look, I know, not that I obviously am kind

125
00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:24,920
Speaker 2: to people, or the benefits that I get out of it,

126
00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:27,760
Speaker 2: but I know when just every day and when it

127
00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:30,920
Speaker 2: becomes habit and you just always make a big deal

128
00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:33,280
Speaker 2: to the barrister and you thank them about the great

129
00:07:33,280 --> 00:07:36,480
Speaker 2: coffee they've made, and you let people into traffic and

130
00:07:36,520 --> 00:07:41,560
Speaker 2: you just smile. It a byproduct, is I just feel

131
00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:42,120
Speaker 2: really good?

132
00:07:42,960 --> 00:07:47,680
Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah, oh absolutely, I mean and especially when you know,

133
00:07:48,120 --> 00:07:52,520
Speaker 1: we spoke yesterday on a podcast about when you understand

134
00:07:52,560 --> 00:07:54,760
Speaker 1: what makes people feel loved as well. You know how

135
00:07:54,760 --> 00:07:57,000
Speaker 1: the five love languages you've heard of that book, I

136
00:07:57,000 --> 00:08:01,520
Speaker 1: guess no, yes, yeah, they just under standing. Like Brad's

137
00:08:01,520 --> 00:08:04,800
Speaker 1: love language might be words of affirmation or physical touch,

138
00:08:04,880 --> 00:08:08,120
Speaker 1: a hug or quality time or and then when you

139
00:08:08,200 --> 00:08:11,240
Speaker 1: know somebody and you know, like my dad's the opposite

140
00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:13,840
Speaker 1: of my dad's love language is physical touch, Like if

141
00:08:13,840 --> 00:08:16,320
Speaker 1: you do not give run a hug, he doesn't want.

142
00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:16,600
Speaker 2: It, right.

143
00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:19,560
Speaker 1: But what he does love is what he loves is

144
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:23,800
Speaker 1: when I tell him he's great, he loves that, right.

145
00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:28,080
Speaker 1: And so yeah, I think that being kind and trying

146
00:08:28,080 --> 00:08:32,319
Speaker 1: to have some insight into what makes people feel loved

147
00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:38,120
Speaker 1: and valued and seen, and you know, doing that with

148
00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:42,200
Speaker 1: no agenda. You know, it's like it sounds strategic, but

149
00:08:42,280 --> 00:08:45,679
Speaker 1: it's you know, just realizing that what will make somebody

150
00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:49,440
Speaker 1: feel spectacular might not to the next person, you know.

151
00:08:49,520 --> 00:08:53,440
Speaker 1: But I think kindness in general. You know. I remember

152
00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:58,480
Speaker 1: last year holding the door open for a lady down

153
00:08:58,720 --> 00:09:01,520
Speaker 1: the road at the and she said, I can hold

154
00:09:01,520 --> 00:09:05,120
Speaker 1: it myself, thank you very much. And I went, huh

155
00:09:06,480 --> 00:09:10,640
Speaker 1: noted tail between legs, off I go, and I just

156
00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:14,760
Speaker 1: it was absolutely fine. It didn't. But I'm like, oh wow,

157
00:09:14,840 --> 00:09:18,600
Speaker 1: I wonder because you know, maybe nine out of ten

158
00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:21,400
Speaker 1: times I would do that for a guy or a lady.

159
00:09:21,440 --> 00:09:24,400
Speaker 1: It doesn't matter, just a human, right. I didn't do

160
00:09:24,440 --> 00:09:26,920
Speaker 1: it because she was a female. I did it because

161
00:09:27,120 --> 00:09:29,160
Speaker 1: I got to the door first. We were both going

162
00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:32,040
Speaker 1: in the same joint, so I stood back, held the

163
00:09:32,080 --> 00:09:36,360
Speaker 1: door wide, and it bothered her. I'm like, okay, but

164
00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:42,760
Speaker 1: it is funny that trying to understand someone else's reality

165
00:09:42,800 --> 00:09:44,680
Speaker 1: and what's going to work for them, because it might

166
00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:47,400
Speaker 1: not work what might work for you, or might what

167
00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:51,080
Speaker 1: might for you be an active kindness for them could

168
00:09:51,160 --> 00:09:55,360
Speaker 1: be you know, inappropriate, which is yeah.

169
00:09:56,000 --> 00:10:01,000
Speaker 2: But you know, as you touched on there, everyone's different

170
00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:04,920
Speaker 2: and you don't know what's going on in that person's life.

171
00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:08,720
Speaker 2: You don't know what what happens at home, you don't

172
00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:16,200
Speaker 2: know how her physical and mental health is, and you're

173
00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:18,400
Speaker 2: not always going to get it right for that reason.

174
00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:21,439
Speaker 2: But you can't control all of those things. But what

175
00:10:21,480 --> 00:10:25,920
Speaker 2: you can control is your own behavior. And you know,

176
00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:33,559
Speaker 2: even the fact, yes, you know, the woman felt, you know,

177
00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:36,400
Speaker 2: like it wasn't appropriate for you to do that. She

178
00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:39,960
Speaker 2: doesn't need a hand and okay, I understand that, But

179
00:10:40,520 --> 00:10:45,200
Speaker 2: there's other people that witnessed you know, your active kindness

180
00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:49,120
Speaker 2: and you being courteous, and it will have made them

181
00:10:49,160 --> 00:10:53,920
Speaker 2: feel good. M So I think you've I think you've

182
00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:58,080
Speaker 2: just got to be true to yourself and do what

183
00:10:58,200 --> 00:10:59,920
Speaker 2: feels right underpset.

184
00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:02,439
Speaker 1: I mean, you're going to have the human experiences, You're

185
00:11:02,440 --> 00:11:04,280
Speaker 1: going to get things wrong, even if you're trying to

186
00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:06,920
Speaker 1: get things right. You know, we talk about this. There's

187
00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:11,080
Speaker 1: an idea in psychology Brad called theory of mind, which

188
00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:14,400
Speaker 1: is basically just understanding how others think, you know, their

189
00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:18,840
Speaker 1: version of reality. And yeah, it's a common thing, is

190
00:11:18,840 --> 00:11:23,600
Speaker 1: that my intention might not be their experience. And so again,

191
00:11:23,760 --> 00:11:25,559
Speaker 1: like that didn't bother me at all. I didn't think

192
00:11:25,600 --> 00:11:29,439
Speaker 1: she was rude. I wasn't. I was, like you said before,

193
00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:32,120
Speaker 1: I was. I was just curious. I'm like, oh, okay,

194
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:35,640
Speaker 1: you know, I'm still going to open the door for people.

195
00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:38,640
Speaker 1: I'm not put up by that. And I get it,

196
00:11:38,720 --> 00:11:42,200
Speaker 1: and it's all good. I don't expect her like she

197
00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:46,120
Speaker 1: doesn't need to be how I expect her to be.

198
00:11:46,520 --> 00:11:50,000
Speaker 1: And then no, she does not if I'm expecting something,

199
00:11:50,160 --> 00:11:53,960
Speaker 1: and I get disappointed by her response, that's one hundred

200
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,640
Speaker 1: percent created by me, not her.

201
00:11:56,360 --> 00:12:00,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, absolutely, And you know, one of the one

202
00:12:00,160 --> 00:12:04,640
Speaker 2: of the simplest ways that I have found. And I

203
00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:07,599
Speaker 2: really am amazed that I wasn't aware of this or

204
00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:09,920
Speaker 2: I didn't think about this when I was younger. But

205
00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:14,200
Speaker 2: maybe that's the wisdom that you get with age and

206
00:12:14,679 --> 00:12:19,440
Speaker 2: experience and through making mistakes and having different relationships with people.

207
00:12:19,520 --> 00:12:25,680
Speaker 2: Some continue and some don't continue. But you know, I've

208
00:12:25,679 --> 00:12:28,960
Speaker 2: been doing some do you know what, I've actually been

209
00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:34,199
Speaker 2: doing some earth moving recently the last couple of years.

210
00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:37,479
Speaker 1: Which is speaking literally or metaphorically.

211
00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:42,600
Speaker 2: Well, no, I'm actually it's a bit of both. Funny thing.

212
00:12:42,880 --> 00:12:46,760
Speaker 2: So I'm not sure that we've spoken since my hometown

213
00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:48,080
Speaker 2: of Rochester was flooded.

214
00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:51,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know that we have. Definitely, I don't think

215
00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:52,000
Speaker 1: we have.

216
00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:57,600
Speaker 2: Well, you know, most people are listening, would have seen

217
00:12:57,600 --> 00:13:00,240
Speaker 2: it on the news, read it in the newspaper, and look,

218
00:13:00,240 --> 00:13:04,240
Speaker 2: the reality is two and a half years on, it's

219
00:13:04,280 --> 00:13:07,160
Speaker 2: still a daily battle for a lot of people. I

220
00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:09,640
Speaker 2: think there's a I think they said, you know, most

221
00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:13,559
Speaker 2: of the sort of one thousand properties in in Rochester

222
00:13:13,760 --> 00:13:18,480
Speaker 2: were severely damaged, if not written of, and I think

223
00:13:18,480 --> 00:13:21,280
Speaker 2: there's something like two hundred homes haven't even been touched yet,

224
00:13:22,120 --> 00:13:27,080
Speaker 2: so you know, and that you know, just even when

225
00:13:27,120 --> 00:13:32,360
Speaker 2: I go home, you know, we'll put it this way, and.

226
00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:36,840
Speaker 3: If the people, if I ever come across these people,

227
00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:40,560
Speaker 3: you know, what I No matter how frustrated and angry

228
00:13:40,559 --> 00:13:42,360
Speaker 3: I'll get, the reality is I'm not the kind of

229
00:13:42,480 --> 00:13:43,680
Speaker 3: person to do anything anyway.

230
00:13:43,720 --> 00:13:47,720
Speaker 2: I'm just, I suppose incredibly disappointed. So here's Rochester, you know,

231
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:52,599
Speaker 2: still dealing with the floods and going back there or

232
00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:56,840
Speaker 2: a few months the tobacco shop in town was fire bombed.

233
00:13:58,160 --> 00:14:00,720
Speaker 2: So now you've got but not only the Echo shop,

234
00:14:00,960 --> 00:14:06,120
Speaker 2: but you've got two businesses either side that. Currently there's

235
00:14:06,320 --> 00:14:11,959
Speaker 2: just a big fence around them. And we've had barricades

236
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:15,160
Speaker 2: and fencing up Bond damage buildings for two and a

237
00:14:15,160 --> 00:14:20,800
Speaker 2: half years. And to have that happen on top of

238
00:14:20,800 --> 00:14:25,560
Speaker 2: that to people listening and people not from there, you know,

239
00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:27,760
Speaker 2: Rochester is a town that you drive through on the

240
00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:32,240
Speaker 2: way to a chuca. Yeah but you know what, and

241
00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:36,040
Speaker 2: this is starting the pleading obvious to me, it is

242
00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:39,560
Speaker 2: home and to a whole lot of people it is

243
00:14:39,680 --> 00:14:43,800
Speaker 2: home and it is their oasis and it is their

244
00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:50,080
Speaker 2: place where they feel safe and on top of the floods.

245
00:14:50,320 --> 00:14:56,640
Speaker 2: So then have a business in town by bond, you know,

246
00:14:56,840 --> 00:15:00,480
Speaker 2: I just for example, the kids back home, you know,

247
00:15:00,520 --> 00:15:05,360
Speaker 2: we had COVID and then and then those in year twelve,

248
00:15:05,440 --> 00:15:08,440
Speaker 2: the sort of the last few months of the year

249
00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:11,640
Speaker 2: twelve was hijacked because they're bustingto Bendigo every day because

250
00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:14,680
Speaker 2: the school's closed now the hospital's only just open. But

251
00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:19,440
Speaker 2: getting back to the earth moving, No, I'm not in

252
00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:23,640
Speaker 2: an excavator and no I'm not lasering paddocks, although wouldn't

253
00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:26,760
Speaker 2: mind having to go to be honest, but no, after

254
00:15:26,840 --> 00:15:30,160
Speaker 2: the floods, good friends, a couple of brothers and their

255
00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:35,280
Speaker 2: wives have got a business wards earth moving and it

256
00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:37,320
Speaker 2: happened in the twenty eleven floods, it happened in the

257
00:15:37,360 --> 00:15:40,480
Speaker 2: twenty twenty two floods. They've probably got fifty odd fellas

258
00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:43,640
Speaker 2: that work and they got big jobs, big contracts, Murraygold

259
00:15:43,680 --> 00:15:48,400
Speaker 2: and Water. They're putting in optic fiber from say albrit

260
00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:51,480
Speaker 2: of Bendigo. A lot, a lot, a lot of big

261
00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:54,280
Speaker 2: projects they've got on. But whenever the floods come, they

262
00:15:54,360 --> 00:15:57,680
Speaker 2: just stop what they're doing and they go from house

263
00:15:57,680 --> 00:16:01,520
Speaker 2: to house in Rochester and they they take out all

264
00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:04,520
Speaker 2: the sudden underlay and the carpet and the furniture and

265
00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:06,080
Speaker 2: then they put it out the front and then they

266
00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:09,840
Speaker 2: go around they pick up all of the furniture and

267
00:16:09,920 --> 00:16:14,080
Speaker 2: everything that's been ruined, which is pretty much everything, and

268
00:16:14,120 --> 00:16:16,200
Speaker 2: they just and then all the plaster comes out, and

269
00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,040
Speaker 2: then they go and pick all that up. And they

270
00:16:18,040 --> 00:16:21,080
Speaker 2: do it because they care and it's their home and

271
00:16:21,120 --> 00:16:25,800
Speaker 2: it's their community. But you know, one of the fellas

272
00:16:25,960 --> 00:16:29,000
Speaker 2: in management they're called me or coming up two years

273
00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:31,480
Speaker 2: ago and he just said, look, Brad, you know in

274
00:16:31,520 --> 00:16:34,560
Speaker 2: your role as a Beyond Blue ambassador and a mental

275
00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:39,600
Speaker 2: health advocate, and you know your experience and lived experience

276
00:16:39,640 --> 00:16:45,000
Speaker 2: which many people know that you know, my family has

277
00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:51,240
Speaker 2: been severely impacted by mental health over the years. So

278
00:16:51,480 --> 00:16:54,640
Speaker 2: they said, look, if you're up for it, would you

279
00:16:54,920 --> 00:16:57,200
Speaker 2: be giving us a hand? So you know what I do.

280
00:16:57,800 --> 00:17:00,440
Speaker 2: I drive home. It was sort of every fourt we've

281
00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:02,600
Speaker 2: managed to but now we're sort of looking at every

282
00:17:02,800 --> 00:17:06,480
Speaker 2: once a month. My mate calls me the smoke o

283
00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:11,720
Speaker 2: delivery guy. I drive. I just I'll find out where

284
00:17:11,720 --> 00:17:15,320
Speaker 2: everyone's working. There might be ten guys at Caiabram. There

285
00:17:15,400 --> 00:17:18,119
Speaker 2: might be five guys over at Cobram. There might be

286
00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:22,080
Speaker 2: three guys at Leechville. There might be half a dozen

287
00:17:22,240 --> 00:17:26,280
Speaker 2: guys over your Bendigo at Raywood. And I just go

288
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,720
Speaker 2: and see them all and you know what I do.

289
00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:33,080
Speaker 2: I just talk, I just listen. I just ask how

290
00:17:33,080 --> 00:17:37,960
Speaker 2: they're going. And I don't have to I don't have.

291
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:44,159
Speaker 4: To say anything because the fact that I'm there in

292
00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:47,760
Speaker 4: a heartbeat, it says to the people that are working there,

293
00:17:48,119 --> 00:17:49,719
Speaker 4: and a lot of them are my friends, and if

294
00:17:49,760 --> 00:17:53,359
Speaker 4: they weren't, they are now is I care about you?

295
00:17:54,560 --> 00:17:58,199
Speaker 4: And by extension, it says that the organization you know,

296
00:17:58,320 --> 00:18:00,959
Speaker 4: Mark and Peter and.

297
00:18:00,040 --> 00:18:02,040
Speaker 2: And Kate and Helen Day care about you, and their

298
00:18:02,119 --> 00:18:05,400
Speaker 2: families care about you, and that is fact. That is fact.

299
00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:11,720
Speaker 2: And those organizations that you know still continue to put

300
00:18:11,760 --> 00:18:17,639
Speaker 2: the profits before people. I feel quite sad that they

301
00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:21,439
Speaker 2: don't understand. They don't understand that, you know what, you

302
00:18:21,520 --> 00:18:24,440
Speaker 2: put the people first, the profits will just come. How

303
00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:27,680
Speaker 2: do I know that? There are some things Craigs, as

304
00:18:27,720 --> 00:18:31,000
Speaker 2: you know, there are some things you just you just know,

305
00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:33,880
Speaker 2: you know. I used an example recently. I was doing

306
00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:37,199
Speaker 2: a talk. When I first left media and started, you know,

307
00:18:37,359 --> 00:18:40,199
Speaker 2: doing a bit of what you're doing. I mean, you know,

308
00:18:40,480 --> 00:18:43,200
Speaker 2: just to be one tenth of you would be fantastic.

309
00:18:43,359 --> 00:18:47,960
Speaker 2: But anyway, you know, I'd go out there and I'd

310
00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:51,359
Speaker 2: have my PowerPoint slides and whatever. Now did I like

311
00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:56,080
Speaker 2: having PowerPoint slides? Nah, But they were my safety net,

312
00:18:56,320 --> 00:18:57,960
Speaker 2: you know, in case I felt like I didn't have

313
00:18:58,119 --> 00:19:03,400
Speaker 2: enough content to talk talk about. But now I never

314
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:09,720
Speaker 2: use slides ever because I have so many stories and anecdotes,

315
00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:12,800
Speaker 2: and I use props and humor and this and that

316
00:19:12,840 --> 00:19:15,080
Speaker 2: and all of the you know, the array of little

317
00:19:15,119 --> 00:19:17,719
Speaker 2: goodies that we have in our we have in our

318
00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:19,439
Speaker 2: kit bag. And that's one of the things. You know,

319
00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:21,560
Speaker 2: when I talk to people about mental health, I say,

320
00:19:21,600 --> 00:19:24,800
Speaker 2: you know, the three most important things have got lived

321
00:19:24,840 --> 00:19:29,360
Speaker 2: experience stories because our brains are hardwired to remember stories.

322
00:19:29,400 --> 00:19:33,639
Speaker 2: And the other one is humor. They go, what humor?

323
00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:37,400
Speaker 2: Talking about mental health talking about things like depression, anxiety, suicide,

324
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:40,760
Speaker 2: And I go, yeah, I know, I know how serious

325
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:44,240
Speaker 2: it is. Our family knows how serious it is, lost

326
00:19:44,280 --> 00:19:49,080
Speaker 2: family members, friends. But if it's not at least a

327
00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:52,240
Speaker 2: little bit enjoyable, how are you ever going to connect

328
00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:56,480
Speaker 2: with people? And it's it's about how we connect, and

329
00:19:56,560 --> 00:20:00,560
Speaker 2: so many of us connect through humor. I was doing

330
00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:03,760
Speaker 2: a talk at wood End there last year, and I

331
00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:06,240
Speaker 2: had a bit of a bit of a croaky throat.

332
00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:08,560
Speaker 2: You know, I wasn't feeling the best, but managed to

333
00:20:08,600 --> 00:20:10,479
Speaker 2: get up off the bed and I went along and

334
00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:14,919
Speaker 2: sold it on. Yeah, And I was talking to the

335
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:21,439
Speaker 2: It was rural financial support group that go around and

336
00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:23,480
Speaker 2: help out people on a lot of them on the

337
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:26,160
Speaker 2: land who are doing a taf YadA yahya with droughts

338
00:20:26,160 --> 00:20:29,959
Speaker 2: and you know, prices of wool and sheep and crops

339
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:35,359
Speaker 2: and everything else. And I didn't have any slides or anything,

340
00:20:35,440 --> 00:20:39,600
Speaker 2: and I just thought, Baggert, I actually feel now ready

341
00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:42,399
Speaker 2: to be one hundred percent me. So I started to

342
00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:44,720
Speaker 2: tell everyone. I said, do you want to hear about

343
00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:49,160
Speaker 2: my water pistol theory? And everyone's looking at me, thinking, oh,

344
00:20:49,359 --> 00:20:52,320
Speaker 2: this guy is a bit of a weirdo. But I

345
00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:55,159
Speaker 2: went and I proceeded to tell them this is what

346
00:20:55,240 --> 00:20:57,680
Speaker 2: I would do if I was running a big organization.

347
00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:03,560
Speaker 2: I would sit down with everyone and I would say, right,

348
00:21:03,920 --> 00:21:07,760
Speaker 2: starting this week, once a month, we are going to

349
00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:13,399
Speaker 2: have an initiation ceremony. Maybe those of you with kids

350
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:17,840
Speaker 2: in primary school, they can do up some little contracts

351
00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:21,360
Speaker 2: for us, and they can also draw some little badgers.

352
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:26,000
Speaker 2: So let's say half a dozen people for the next

353
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:31,080
Speaker 2: week they are going to be our designated water pistol

354
00:21:31,119 --> 00:21:40,520
Speaker 2: police and people listing that weren't thinking I'm you know, weird,

355
00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:44,160
Speaker 2: and now thinking oh no, it's quite weird. But bear

356
00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:47,720
Speaker 2: with me. So what happens is these people have license,

357
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:52,560
Speaker 2: let's say nine o'clock at night, they get to roam

358
00:21:52,600 --> 00:21:55,720
Speaker 2: around the building with the water pistol. Just make sure

359
00:21:55,760 --> 00:21:58,080
Speaker 2: you fill it up at the tap keeck. It's working,

360
00:21:59,320 --> 00:22:02,280
Speaker 2: and they get to walk around. Now, if somebody is

361
00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:06,240
Speaker 2: at their laptop or at their computer and they're still working,

362
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:10,280
Speaker 2: you get to say to them, okay, water person, pull

363
00:22:10,320 --> 00:22:15,080
Speaker 2: these hands off the keyboard, and they go, hang on,

364
00:22:15,240 --> 00:22:17,359
Speaker 2: hang on, I've just got to finish this. I've just

365
00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:20,840
Speaker 2: got to finish this. No, you know the rules. I'll

366
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:23,600
Speaker 2: give you three seconds three two one boom, And if

367
00:22:23,640 --> 00:22:30,600
Speaker 2: they continue to work, you're getting with the water pistol. Now,

368
00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:35,880
Speaker 2: people say, oh, that's not going to happen, and I say, well,

369
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:39,639
Speaker 2: number one, why not? And you don't physically have to

370
00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:43,919
Speaker 2: go to that length go to those lengths, but in

371
00:22:43,960 --> 00:22:47,280
Speaker 2: an instant, right, that's the culture of a place. And

372
00:22:47,359 --> 00:22:51,240
Speaker 2: you know exactly what I'm saying, Craig. That person turns

373
00:22:51,240 --> 00:22:54,760
Speaker 2: off the computer. He walks out of the building with

374
00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:58,800
Speaker 2: a smile on his face, and this beautiful feeling in

375
00:22:58,840 --> 00:23:04,240
Speaker 2: his heart because he thinks to himself, this place cares

376
00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:08,959
Speaker 2: about me and the person. The water pistol officer says, hey,

377
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:12,240
Speaker 2: we figure the most important. You are the most important

378
00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:15,359
Speaker 2: person to us, and we figure the most important people

379
00:23:15,359 --> 00:23:18,440
Speaker 2: to you or your family. Go home. Now. There will

380
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:23,440
Speaker 2: always be exceptions where people there are deadlines and people

381
00:23:23,480 --> 00:23:26,359
Speaker 2: are going to be working extra hours and whatever. But

382
00:23:26,440 --> 00:23:30,280
Speaker 2: you know what happens. You leave an organization that has

383
00:23:30,359 --> 00:23:33,199
Speaker 2: that culture and that attitude. You wake up in the

384
00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:36,719
Speaker 2: morning and this is not why you initiate the culture, clearly,

385
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:40,280
Speaker 2: but you wake up the next morning and you drive

386
00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:43,159
Speaker 2: to work and you walk in with a smile on

387
00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:47,000
Speaker 2: your face. Because, as I say to anyone, how do

388
00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:52,800
Speaker 2: you miss something? How do you miss someone? If you

389
00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:58,320
Speaker 2: never leave it, you never leave them, It's impossible to

390
00:23:58,440 --> 00:24:02,679
Speaker 2: miss it. I am people first every time.

391
00:24:03,160 --> 00:24:05,800
Speaker 1: I love it. I one of the things I mean,

392
00:24:06,080 --> 00:24:08,760
Speaker 1: like you, I do a lot of corporate and I

393
00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:13,920
Speaker 1: ask the bosses he or she manages leaders. I say,

394
00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:18,119
Speaker 1: do your staff like coming to work? And they're like what,

395
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:19,800
Speaker 1: I go, do they like coming?

396
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:20,080
Speaker 2: Like?

397
00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:24,600
Speaker 1: Do they want to be here? And another question that

398
00:24:24,720 --> 00:24:28,160
Speaker 1: I ask is what do you think it's like being

399
00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:32,159
Speaker 1: around you, like what do you think you which is

400
00:24:32,359 --> 00:24:34,720
Speaker 1: in a relevant to my research and my study, right,

401
00:24:34,800 --> 00:24:39,800
Speaker 1: but trying to like I do about one hundred talks

402
00:24:39,800 --> 00:24:43,960
Speaker 1: a year in corporate, about one hundred presentations, everything from

403
00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:47,760
Speaker 1: generally forty five minute keynotes through to full days, right,

404
00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:52,600
Speaker 1: And a lot of it is really around you know,

405
00:24:52,680 --> 00:24:56,479
Speaker 1: culture and communication, connection, problem solving, leadership, team work, all

406
00:24:56,560 --> 00:24:59,600
Speaker 1: that stuff, right. But I never really talk about business.

407
00:24:59,640 --> 00:25:03,919
Speaker 1: I just about people. And I was on a call

408
00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:07,800
Speaker 1: this week. I obviously can't say with whom or but

409
00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:11,879
Speaker 1: the person I was talking to said, look, we really

410
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:15,560
Speaker 1: need to be seen. We need to be seen to care.

411
00:25:15,880 --> 00:25:21,159
Speaker 1: I said, no, you need to actually care. Not It

412
00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:24,200
Speaker 1: was almost like and I and they went, oh yeah, yeah,

413
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:26,960
Speaker 1: of course. It was like almost like we need to

414
00:25:27,080 --> 00:25:29,919
Speaker 1: pretend like we care so that they feel valued. I know,

415
00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:33,919
Speaker 1: don't fucking pretend actually care. And it's that It is

416
00:25:33,960 --> 00:25:38,000
Speaker 1: really interesting because sometimes I get on a call and

417
00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:41,760
Speaker 1: they think I'm I'm going to come in and kind

418
00:25:41,800 --> 00:25:44,040
Speaker 1: of reset the business somehow, and I go, I'm not

419
00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:45,800
Speaker 1: actually going to talk about the business. I'm going to

420
00:25:45,800 --> 00:25:48,479
Speaker 1: talk about all the people who drive the business, you know,

421
00:25:48,960 --> 00:25:51,439
Speaker 1: and even if it's a tech business, it's still driven

422
00:25:51,520 --> 00:25:54,560
Speaker 1: by humans. And every human's got a personality and an

423
00:25:54,600 --> 00:25:57,879
Speaker 1: ego and emotions and mind and conditioning and programming and

424
00:25:57,920 --> 00:26:03,959
Speaker 1: fears and expectations and emotions, and just trying to understand,

425
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:08,680
Speaker 1: like we can build a thriving organization that's commercially successful,

426
00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:13,639
Speaker 1: perhaps wildly so, while also genuinely caring about the people

427
00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:17,000
Speaker 1: in the middle of it, not pretending to care. Let's

428
00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:21,520
Speaker 1: create a culture that people want to be in. Let's

429
00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:25,399
Speaker 1: create an experience that people love to be in the

430
00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:29,040
Speaker 1: middle of. I interviewed, do you remember Sally O'Connell who

431
00:26:29,119 --> 00:26:29,840
Speaker 1: used to work for me?

432
00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:32,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember sales.

433
00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:34,720
Speaker 1: She loved it, so sells a big deal. Now sells

434
00:26:34,720 --> 00:26:36,200
Speaker 1: a big deal. She's the.

435
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:38,760
Speaker 2: Real estate or something.

436
00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:40,200
Speaker 1: She's in real estates.

437
00:26:40,560 --> 00:26:41,280
Speaker 2: Yep, yep.

438
00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:43,720
Speaker 1: She's got a fancy job. She's going great. And the

439
00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:46,119
Speaker 1: nicest thing that anyone said to me in a while

440
00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:49,720
Speaker 1: is she said when I loved loved working at Harper's

441
00:26:49,720 --> 00:26:51,200
Speaker 1: because she was a trainer back in the day, and

442
00:26:51,240 --> 00:26:55,320
Speaker 1: she said it was just an amazing environment. Every day

443
00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:58,840
Speaker 1: was fun. I loved going to work. I just loved

444
00:26:58,920 --> 00:27:02,399
Speaker 1: being part of all of that, and for me, that

445
00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:05,840
Speaker 1: makes me way happier than how much dough we made

446
00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:08,560
Speaker 1: or how many bodies we changed, or all of those

447
00:27:08,600 --> 00:27:11,919
Speaker 1: things are kind of KPIs. But when someone who worked

448
00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:15,320
Speaker 1: in your business says that was the best work culture

449
00:27:15,359 --> 00:27:18,159
Speaker 1: I've ever been in me, I'm like, yeah, I did.

450
00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:22,919
Speaker 1: I did at least one good thing one percent.

451
00:27:22,960 --> 00:27:25,600
Speaker 2: And it's just so lovely to have a yeah, that

452
00:27:25,720 --> 00:27:30,119
Speaker 2: sense of belonging, that sense of connection. You're part of

453
00:27:30,119 --> 00:27:33,320
Speaker 2: a club, You're part of a group, and you know,

454
00:27:33,359 --> 00:27:36,800
Speaker 2: that's one thing I'll openly say I missed when I

455
00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:42,320
Speaker 2: left mainstream media. You know, I had them talking of

456
00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:46,040
Speaker 2: mental health and all things associated. I had a really,

457
00:27:47,280 --> 00:27:51,600
Speaker 2: a really delightful experience the other night. A friend asked

458
00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:54,960
Speaker 2: if I wanted to go and see a play or

459
00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:59,120
Speaker 2: a production at Maltause. Theer it was called Flicker, and

460
00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:01,960
Speaker 2: it was written a woman and it was it was

461
00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:05,560
Speaker 2: a dark comedy and it was written by a woman

462
00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:09,360
Speaker 2: in the UK and it just it was hugely popular

463
00:28:09,400 --> 00:28:13,040
Speaker 2: at the Edinburgh Festival, and it was about her ongoing

464
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:18,640
Speaker 2: struggle with obsessive compulsive disorder, which you and I have discussed,

465
00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:22,600
Speaker 2: and you're offside of Melissa, we've we've discussed, and it

466
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:25,240
Speaker 2: was what was really interesting were a lot of the

467
00:28:25,240 --> 00:28:30,520
Speaker 2: people involved that were either performing or in the crowd.

468
00:28:32,280 --> 00:28:35,800
Speaker 2: We all went to support them. My friend that invited me,

469
00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:40,680
Speaker 2: he has OCD, I have OCD. And what it really

470
00:28:40,800 --> 00:28:48,960
Speaker 2: touched on was the obsessive, random, often really disturbing thoughts

471
00:28:49,360 --> 00:28:51,760
Speaker 2: that a lot of us with O c D have.

472
00:28:52,560 --> 00:28:54,440
Speaker 2: And anyway, they were just at the end they you know,

473
00:28:54,480 --> 00:28:56,800
Speaker 2: you could ask questions or just give a bit of feedback,

474
00:28:56,840 --> 00:28:59,640
Speaker 2: and I made a point of standing up sort of saying, hey,

475
00:28:59,640 --> 00:29:02,320
Speaker 2: look you because you know, I as a young kid

476
00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:08,240
Speaker 2: growing up in rural Victoria and having you know, these

477
00:29:08,280 --> 00:29:11,520
Speaker 2: crazy thoughts or you know, these rituals that would take

478
00:29:11,600 --> 00:29:17,320
Speaker 2: hours and hours and hours and hours to complete just

479
00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:19,800
Speaker 2: because my head told me I had to do them

480
00:29:19,880 --> 00:29:25,160
Speaker 2: or something terrible would happen. I just said thanks to everyone,

481
00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:29,240
Speaker 2: because you know, at fifty three, Craig, that was the

482
00:29:29,280 --> 00:29:35,040
Speaker 2: first time I've ever been in a room with a

483
00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:40,800
Speaker 2: whole lot of people that have a similar obviously different

484
00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:44,640
Speaker 2: in some ways, but a similar story to myself in

485
00:29:44,680 --> 00:29:49,760
Speaker 2: regards to my anxiety. And you know what, it felt

486
00:29:49,800 --> 00:29:56,240
Speaker 2: really nice. It felt really nice too. To know that

487
00:29:56,320 --> 00:30:01,560
Speaker 2: people are looking at you and they get it, you

488
00:30:01,640 --> 00:30:03,320
Speaker 2: get them.

489
00:30:03,560 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 1: Well, it's probably the first time that you've ever been

490
00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:10,040
Speaker 1: in a room with lots of people where you, the

491
00:30:10,120 --> 00:30:15,240
Speaker 1: dude with OCD, is the normal person, Like you're the

492
00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:18,440
Speaker 1: majority in the room, you know, like if I went in,

493
00:30:18,560 --> 00:30:19,960
Speaker 1: I would have been the odd man out.

494
00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:24,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, and clearly not everyone in the room had OCD,

495
00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:27,600
Speaker 2: but those of us in the room. You know, it

496
00:30:27,680 --> 00:30:30,640
Speaker 2: was actually really gorgeous afterwards, and you know, I caught

497
00:30:30,680 --> 00:30:32,920
Speaker 2: up with someone I know not very well, and then

498
00:30:32,960 --> 00:30:35,720
Speaker 2: I caught up with someone else. Actually I caught up

499
00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:39,920
Speaker 2: with I'll tell you how I did. Catch up with

500
00:30:40,640 --> 00:30:44,840
Speaker 2: Penny Moody, who is Hugh Van Kylenberg's wife, and she

501
00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:48,200
Speaker 2: wrote a book that I haven't read, The Joy Thief,

502
00:30:49,360 --> 00:30:54,960
Speaker 2: And you know, just to meet Penny and just like

503
00:30:55,600 --> 00:30:59,240
Speaker 2: you'd introduce yourself, Hi, Hey, going yeah, do you have OCD? Yeah?

504
00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:02,920
Speaker 2: Do you have both? Oh yeah? And we're comparing stories,

505
00:31:03,640 --> 00:31:08,840
Speaker 2: you know, of our adolescents and a lot of stories

506
00:31:08,880 --> 00:31:12,360
Speaker 2: that I'm not going to miss mentioned on your podcast.

507
00:31:12,520 --> 00:31:16,000
Speaker 2: But gee, it was, you know, going back to what

508
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:19,080
Speaker 2: we're talking about about caring. I mean, you just you

509
00:31:19,120 --> 00:31:22,280
Speaker 2: didn't have to meet everyone in the audience or those

510
00:31:22,400 --> 00:31:26,400
Speaker 2: that were performing to know that, you know, there was

511
00:31:26,480 --> 00:31:28,920
Speaker 2: a lot of a whole lot of care, whole lot

512
00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:32,880
Speaker 2: of compassion and empathy and love, yeah, love in the room.

513
00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:38,200
Speaker 1: Can I ask where are you at? With that? Now?

514
00:31:38,440 --> 00:31:40,719
Speaker 1: I don't even really know the right question, but I

515
00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:43,160
Speaker 1: know that when you were a kid, which we spoke

516
00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:46,880
Speaker 1: about quite a bit with Melissa in that episode. I

517
00:31:46,960 --> 00:31:49,040
Speaker 1: might try and find that episode and shout it out

518
00:31:49,080 --> 00:31:54,520
Speaker 1: to you everyone, because it's just that was such a great, insightful, fascinating,

519
00:31:54,840 --> 00:31:59,480
Speaker 1: vulnerable chat that we had around Brad's teenage years and

520
00:31:59,600 --> 00:32:02,760
Speaker 1: other years. But so, if let's say that your OCD

521
00:32:03,040 --> 00:32:06,360
Speaker 1: was at a ten, then where are you at now?

522
00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:09,040
Speaker 1: If that's not a stupid question?

523
00:32:10,240 --> 00:32:15,200
Speaker 2: No, no, it's not a stupid question. To be quite honest,

524
00:32:18,320 --> 00:32:24,280
Speaker 2: it's a ten, but daily it's a three or a

525
00:32:24,320 --> 00:32:29,520
Speaker 2: four because I now take medication right every day and

526
00:32:29,840 --> 00:32:34,720
Speaker 2: just highlighting even to me the power of our minds,

527
00:32:34,760 --> 00:32:39,240
Speaker 2: our brains and the way we think. Until I took medication,

528
00:32:39,480 --> 00:32:48,800
Speaker 2: I was never ever, ever, ever ever able to break

529
00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:54,480
Speaker 2: my rituals or say to myself, no, no, it's just

530
00:32:54,560 --> 00:32:57,720
Speaker 2: in my head. Don't worry about it. I just I couldn't.

531
00:32:57,880 --> 00:33:02,600
Speaker 2: It was just too overwhelming. Whereas now I take medication

532
00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:07,480
Speaker 2: every day, and even when I am being very anxious

533
00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:10,040
Speaker 2: and I can sort of feel some of those rituals

534
00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:16,160
Speaker 2: or thoughts beers coming on, I'm able to go, hey,

535
00:33:18,840 --> 00:33:23,040
Speaker 2: this will pass. This is uncomfortable, but it will pass.

536
00:33:23,520 --> 00:33:26,840
Speaker 2: And you know, for those of those people listening that

537
00:33:26,920 --> 00:33:29,400
Speaker 2: know exactly what I'm talking about, I actually just I

538
00:33:29,440 --> 00:33:34,760
Speaker 2: saw this pop up on Instagram today and I thought, Wow,

539
00:33:35,680 --> 00:33:38,880
Speaker 2: this really does sum it up, and it was where

540
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:43,400
Speaker 2: is it from? It was from navigating OCD. OCD can

541
00:33:43,440 --> 00:33:47,800
Speaker 2: make you doubt number one, your memories, to your morality,

542
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:53,560
Speaker 2: your relationships, your sexuality, your diagnosis, your reality, your mind,

543
00:33:54,200 --> 00:34:02,160
Speaker 2: your identity, your sanity, number ten, absolutely everything, and every

544
00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:12,440
Speaker 2: one of those ten I know I've experienced every one. Wow,

545
00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:16,080
Speaker 2: And you know what the reality is my you know,

546
00:34:16,160 --> 00:34:21,120
Speaker 2: my psychiatrist said I was sort of severe to sort

547
00:34:21,120 --> 00:34:24,960
Speaker 2: of mid range, and you know, I am acutely aware

548
00:34:25,000 --> 00:34:28,360
Speaker 2: that there's a whole lot of people with OCD that

549
00:34:28,480 --> 00:34:33,960
Speaker 2: is so so debilitating that you know, they can't get

550
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:36,440
Speaker 2: out of the house or it's a real struggle go

551
00:34:36,560 --> 00:34:39,960
Speaker 2: I know, back pre medication, just getting out of the

552
00:34:40,040 --> 00:34:42,879
Speaker 2: house and checking everything. You know, the stove. I checked

553
00:34:42,920 --> 00:34:46,360
Speaker 2: the stove, I don't know, fifty times. Then you finally

554
00:34:46,360 --> 00:34:47,960
Speaker 2: get out of the house, you lock the door, check

555
00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:51,560
Speaker 2: the doors locked twelve times. And then I get ten

556
00:34:51,600 --> 00:34:54,400
Speaker 2: meters down the road and I go but what is

557
00:34:54,480 --> 00:34:58,640
Speaker 2: the stove really off? Yeah? And then I go back again.

558
00:34:58,920 --> 00:35:03,640
Speaker 2: And this those people that know exactly what I'm talking about,

559
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:08,680
Speaker 2: this is every day of your life. And I was

560
00:35:10,840 --> 00:35:14,040
Speaker 2: my psychiatrist describe me as like I was a high

561
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:19,319
Speaker 2: functioning someone who suffered from OCD. I managed to hide it.

562
00:35:19,760 --> 00:35:23,120
Speaker 2: But you know, here's something I really only thought about recently.

563
00:35:23,400 --> 00:35:29,080
Speaker 2: And this might sound bonkers, and I don't use that word.

564
00:35:29,520 --> 00:35:31,760
Speaker 2: I use it in an endearing kind of way because

565
00:35:31,760 --> 00:35:33,879
Speaker 2: I've sort of got to laugh sometimes because it helps

566
00:35:33,920 --> 00:35:37,600
Speaker 2: me deal with it. But all those years of sitting

567
00:35:37,600 --> 00:35:41,760
Speaker 2: on a news desk, when I was sitting next to someone,

568
00:35:42,120 --> 00:35:44,560
Speaker 2: you know what, it was good when there was a

569
00:35:44,560 --> 00:35:47,880
Speaker 2: breaking story, and you know, I was very busy and

570
00:35:47,920 --> 00:35:50,360
Speaker 2: I had to rewrite things and so forth, because it

571
00:35:50,400 --> 00:35:56,080
Speaker 2: would take my mind away from my anxiety. But one

572
00:35:56,120 --> 00:36:02,120
Speaker 2: of the thoughts that would consume me often was I'd

573
00:36:02,120 --> 00:36:05,960
Speaker 2: sit up on the desk and I'd have a very random,

574
00:36:06,080 --> 00:36:11,680
Speaker 2: disturbing thought where I'd think, imagine if I just went crazy. Now,

575
00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:17,319
Speaker 2: imagine if I just, you know, attacked someone. Now, I've

576
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:21,239
Speaker 2: never hurt anyone in my life, and I never would physically.

577
00:36:21,280 --> 00:36:25,360
Speaker 2: I'm no way, I just I just will not accept

578
00:36:25,440 --> 00:36:31,600
Speaker 2: violence in any any form. But you know, here I

579
00:36:31,640 --> 00:36:34,239
Speaker 2: am up, the camera's about to go on to me,

580
00:36:34,640 --> 00:36:37,560
Speaker 2: and the news reader says, now with the sports Brad,

581
00:36:37,719 --> 00:36:40,600
Speaker 2: And I've got this going over and over in my head,

582
00:36:41,160 --> 00:36:43,239
Speaker 2: thinking what is wrong with me? What is wrong with me?

583
00:36:43,320 --> 00:36:45,600
Speaker 2: Why am I thinking that? Would I actually do that?

584
00:36:45,880 --> 00:36:49,120
Speaker 2: Surely I'd never do that. Now, after talking to mental

585
00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:53,720
Speaker 2: health professionals for a number of years, almost every time

586
00:36:54,280 --> 00:36:59,799
Speaker 2: the thought never actually happens. Yes, and most of us,

587
00:36:59,800 --> 00:37:02,400
Speaker 2: I think, have these very random thoughts. But when you

588
00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:09,040
Speaker 2: have OCD, it you can't stop thinking about it, and

589
00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:14,040
Speaker 2: it really disturbs you because you start thinking like that

590
00:37:14,160 --> 00:37:17,560
Speaker 2: list I said, who am I? What am I do

591
00:37:17,680 --> 00:37:21,480
Speaker 2: I want to hurt? No? I don't. But the random

592
00:37:21,560 --> 00:37:25,120
Speaker 2: thoughts that so many people on the planet can dismiss,

593
00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:30,120
Speaker 2: those of us with OCD, we can't. We find it

594
00:37:30,160 --> 00:37:34,720
Speaker 2: really really really hard. So you know what I tell anyone,

595
00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 2: I take medication every day. And you know, I have

596
00:37:37,719 --> 00:37:41,200
Speaker 2: had a couple of experiences where older people say look

597
00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:44,680
Speaker 2: at me and go, well you tell people that, and

598
00:37:44,760 --> 00:37:47,040
Speaker 2: I'm like, well, yeah, it's not my fault. That's the

599
00:37:47,040 --> 00:37:49,479
Speaker 2: way I was born, like just like I was born

600
00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:52,880
Speaker 2: with red air and lots. Actually I wasn't born with

601
00:37:52,920 --> 00:37:55,439
Speaker 2: the freckles. They came once I popped out into the sun.

602
00:37:56,040 --> 00:37:58,799
Speaker 2: But it is who I am. And you know what

603
00:37:58,920 --> 00:38:03,520
Speaker 2: we talk about being just by the fact that I

604
00:38:03,800 --> 00:38:07,400
Speaker 2: talk about my anxiety and my mental health and taking

605
00:38:07,480 --> 00:38:12,000
Speaker 2: medication daily, I don't need people driving around or listening

606
00:38:12,040 --> 00:38:15,720
Speaker 2: to this podcast at home or while they're walking whatever.

607
00:38:16,360 --> 00:38:19,120
Speaker 2: I don't need them to say, hey, thank you. You

608
00:38:19,200 --> 00:38:21,680
Speaker 2: have just put a smile on my face. You've made

609
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:24,520
Speaker 2: me feel better. I feel like you and I have

610
00:38:24,600 --> 00:38:27,480
Speaker 2: a connection. I know that that's how a lot of

611
00:38:27,520 --> 00:38:30,280
Speaker 2: people are going to feel because that's how I feel.

612
00:38:31,440 --> 00:38:36,680
Speaker 1: Wow, can I ask with so? Firstly, when I think

613
00:38:36,680 --> 00:38:39,480
Speaker 1: about by the way, if you if you don't know

614
00:38:40,800 --> 00:38:44,000
Speaker 1: who Brad is, some of you won't. So Brad work

615
00:38:44,040 --> 00:38:49,120
Speaker 1: for a long time on Channel ten. It was doing

616
00:38:49,160 --> 00:38:51,840
Speaker 1: the sport and was it national or just Victoria.

617
00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:56,120
Speaker 2: Well it was Victoria. But then I hosted Sports Tonight

618
00:38:56,200 --> 00:39:01,520
Speaker 2: out of Sydney for seven years with my dear buddy

619
00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:05,359
Speaker 2: Sandra Sully, who I caught up with last Friday. We

620
00:39:05,440 --> 00:39:10,320
Speaker 2: co hosted the Chamberlain Foundation Ray Chamberlain and his brothers

621
00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:12,680
Speaker 2: Brian and Peter. They do a lot of great work

622
00:39:13,200 --> 00:39:18,280
Speaker 2: raising money and awareness around mental health. And Ray said, oh, gee,

623
00:39:18,440 --> 00:39:20,400
Speaker 2: ten years when Norly have a lunch, you know, the

624
00:39:20,440 --> 00:39:22,680
Speaker 2: dream would be, let's have a black tied dinner. And

625
00:39:22,719 --> 00:39:24,600
Speaker 2: I wonder if we could get you and Sandra back

626
00:39:24,640 --> 00:39:28,520
Speaker 2: together and just highlighting what a beautiful person Sandra is.

627
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:33,440
Speaker 2: I said, Hey, what do you think of this? Sandra goes, yeah, cool, great.

628
00:39:33,960 --> 00:39:36,920
Speaker 2: So she flew down here. No, it wasn't paid or anything.

629
00:39:37,160 --> 00:39:40,560
Speaker 2: Flew down Friday night. We were at the Ritz Carlton

630
00:39:41,239 --> 00:39:44,080
Speaker 2: and we had a fantastic night. We raised a whole

631
00:39:44,160 --> 00:39:49,600
Speaker 2: lot of money. But you know, Sandra and I have

632
00:39:49,680 --> 00:39:53,480
Speaker 2: these conversations. You know, it's just really really.

633
00:39:53,920 --> 00:39:56,680
Speaker 1: I love it. I love it. I love Ray. By

634
00:39:56,760 --> 00:39:58,279
Speaker 1: the way, He's been on the show a couple of

635
00:39:58,320 --> 00:40:00,359
Speaker 1: times and we've caught up for a coffee or two

636
00:40:00,400 --> 00:40:04,279
Speaker 1: he's a good human. I wanted to ask. Yeah, like,

637
00:40:04,440 --> 00:40:07,040
Speaker 1: it amazes me that you had that. You know, the

638
00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:09,080
Speaker 1: story about that some people would have just heard for

639
00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:11,200
Speaker 1: the first time with the stove on and off fifty

640
00:40:11,239 --> 00:40:13,640
Speaker 1: times and the door twelve times, driving down the road

641
00:40:13,640 --> 00:40:16,120
Speaker 1: and not fucking l was the actual And then back

642
00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:19,520
Speaker 1: then the guy who's well for at least seven years,

643
00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:22,600
Speaker 1: but twenty or twenty five years on TV all up

644
00:40:22,680 --> 00:40:25,600
Speaker 1: or whatever it was, but in front of a national audience,

645
00:40:26,239 --> 00:40:30,040
Speaker 1: like for the average punter who doesn't have anxiety, who

646
00:40:30,120 --> 00:40:34,480
Speaker 1: doesn't have OCD, For the average punter, that would be

647
00:40:34,600 --> 00:40:40,560
Speaker 1: fucking paralyzingly terrifying. But the guy with OCD and anxiety

648
00:40:41,160 --> 00:40:44,480
Speaker 1: does that seemingly effortlessly.

649
00:40:47,239 --> 00:40:49,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a bit like a duck though on the water,

650
00:40:49,760 --> 00:40:52,680
Speaker 2: isn't it underneath? You know, there's a fair bit going on.

651
00:40:52,840 --> 00:40:56,959
Speaker 2: But you know, you touched on me. People might see

652
00:40:57,000 --> 00:41:00,560
Speaker 2: what I did from their living rooms and and I'm

653
00:41:00,600 --> 00:41:05,360
Speaker 2: on the TV. But anxiety is what I was battling.

654
00:41:06,120 --> 00:41:13,200
Speaker 2: There are people listening they too, probably everyone, in fact,

655
00:41:13,719 --> 00:41:20,480
Speaker 2: everyone at some point in their lives is also battling stumpthing. Yes,

656
00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:26,880
Speaker 2: it might be a number of different things. And you

657
00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:31,080
Speaker 2: know that quote about everyone is battling something that we

658
00:41:31,200 --> 00:41:34,280
Speaker 2: can't see, we don't know about, Well, that was mine.

659
00:41:34,440 --> 00:41:38,239
Speaker 2: And you know, I paint the picture of the difficult days.

660
00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:42,560
Speaker 2: You know, there were far more great days, and the

661
00:41:42,960 --> 00:41:48,000
Speaker 2: glorious days far out white weighed the really difficult days.

662
00:41:48,040 --> 00:41:50,920
Speaker 2: And I remember sitting with my psychiatrist one day and

663
00:41:50,960 --> 00:41:52,960
Speaker 2: she looked at me, and it was quite funny, actually,

664
00:41:53,320 --> 00:41:55,160
Speaker 2: because I always try and to have a good laugh

665
00:41:55,200 --> 00:41:58,640
Speaker 2: when we're in there. She said, Brad, why have you

666
00:41:58,800 --> 00:42:01,960
Speaker 2: done anything about this till now? And I said, you

667
00:42:02,000 --> 00:42:05,719
Speaker 2: know why? Because it was my normal. I didn't know

668
00:42:07,120 --> 00:42:11,080
Speaker 2: anything else. It's like if somebody had told me since

669
00:42:11,160 --> 00:42:14,120
Speaker 2: I was a kid and forever in a day, this

670
00:42:14,239 --> 00:42:18,160
Speaker 2: guy's actually green, and I'd say yeah, but and they

671
00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:20,640
Speaker 2: go no, no, no, no, I know you think that color is blue,

672
00:42:20,640 --> 00:42:24,080
Speaker 2: but it's actually really green. Who am I to question that?

673
00:42:25,080 --> 00:42:28,200
Speaker 1: Yes? Yeah, yeah, you know that's that's your normal, that's

674
00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:29,440
Speaker 1: your that's my normal.

675
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:34,319
Speaker 2: You know in high school, you know, I have this

676
00:42:34,400 --> 00:42:37,560
Speaker 2: thing where and I sort of still do. Actually, I

677
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:43,359
Speaker 2: mean most of my my rituals they're still there, but

678
00:42:43,480 --> 00:42:48,800
Speaker 2: they they are softened considerably through the through the medication.

679
00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:50,960
Speaker 2: I remember getting up a couple of years ago for

680
00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:54,000
Speaker 2: a walk. Maybe I was walking to the gym so there,

681
00:42:54,200 --> 00:42:58,160
Speaker 2: that would have been a while ago. And it was

682
00:42:58,200 --> 00:43:00,239
Speaker 2: like it was five thirty in the morning and for

683
00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:05,239
Speaker 2: a walk, and I got home it was about an

684
00:43:05,280 --> 00:43:08,640
Speaker 2: hour and twenty walk. And I thought, this particular morning,

685
00:43:08,640 --> 00:43:10,279
Speaker 2: I thought, you know what, from the time I get

686
00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:12,640
Speaker 2: up to the time I get back from the walk,

687
00:43:13,000 --> 00:43:16,240
Speaker 2: checking things. If I walked to the left of the post,

688
00:43:16,360 --> 00:43:19,000
Speaker 2: something will happen to Maum. If I walk to the

689
00:43:19,080 --> 00:43:22,680
Speaker 2: right of the post, something will happen to my sister. Therefore,

690
00:43:23,600 --> 00:43:26,640
Speaker 2: I can't win. And these things are going on while

691
00:43:26,640 --> 00:43:28,920
Speaker 2: I'm out walking. I think I got home and I

692
00:43:28,920 --> 00:43:34,759
Speaker 2: think there was something like seventy odd instances or moments

693
00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:38,680
Speaker 2: that morning, And that was before seven o'clock where I

694
00:43:38,800 --> 00:43:45,000
Speaker 2: actually was in my own little world orchard thinking I

695
00:43:45,160 --> 00:43:48,000
Speaker 2: have to make a choice here. And the reality is

696
00:43:48,360 --> 00:43:52,480
Speaker 2: none of it was real, but in my head it

697
00:43:52,680 --> 00:43:58,000
Speaker 2: was real. And then, you know, prior to leaving media,

698
00:43:58,040 --> 00:43:59,800
Speaker 2: and then I go into work and talk about the

699
00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:02,040
Speaker 2: your story of the day or the cricket story of

700
00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:04,839
Speaker 2: the day, and and you know, one thing I want

701
00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:07,439
Speaker 2: to emphasize, Craig, this is not well with me, far

702
00:44:07,600 --> 00:44:11,719
Speaker 2: from it. But my whole point about talking about my

703
00:44:11,880 --> 00:44:14,920
Speaker 2: lift experience is I know how it much it helps

704
00:44:15,360 --> 00:44:19,040
Speaker 2: other people. And for those people out there that have OCD,

705
00:44:19,480 --> 00:44:22,759
Speaker 2: or have a family member or a friend someone that

706
00:44:24,480 --> 00:44:28,920
Speaker 2: really struggles with OCD, you know, I'm sending you big hugs.

707
00:44:28,920 --> 00:44:33,480
Speaker 2: And if you ever see me, just dick, just maybe

708
00:44:33,520 --> 00:44:36,200
Speaker 2: let me know first, and then just hey, I'm a hugger.

709
00:44:36,480 --> 00:44:39,480
Speaker 2: I'm a hugger, and you know, if I can ever

710
00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:43,040
Speaker 2: help with anything, I'll always help, always help.

711
00:44:43,760 --> 00:44:46,239
Speaker 1: And if you can, everyone come up from behind and

712
00:44:46,320 --> 00:44:49,920
Speaker 1: just spoon it in a big spoon, little spoon. So

713
00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:52,239
Speaker 1: when you're going to do something like this, which is

714
00:44:53,719 --> 00:44:57,319
Speaker 1: very very underwhelming compared to television, and you're talking to

715
00:44:58,120 --> 00:45:01,480
Speaker 1: an old friend and it's the you know, next to

716
00:45:01,560 --> 00:45:05,400
Speaker 1: no pressure. But when you're doing something like this and

717
00:45:05,960 --> 00:45:08,719
Speaker 1: we're jumping on the call at three point thirty and

718
00:45:08,760 --> 00:45:14,399
Speaker 1: it's three twenty five, is there any apprehension, any anxiety,

719
00:45:14,640 --> 00:45:17,120
Speaker 1: any rumination or zero?

720
00:45:19,120 --> 00:45:27,200
Speaker 2: Zero? Yeah, great, zero, Because this is I'm talking to

721
00:45:27,280 --> 00:45:32,759
Speaker 2: someone I've known for coming up twenty coming up three decades.

722
00:45:33,520 --> 00:45:38,279
Speaker 2: We're talking about something I'm passionate about I don't I'm

723
00:45:38,280 --> 00:45:42,800
Speaker 2: not frantically running around the newsroom getting a story prepared

724
00:45:43,000 --> 00:45:45,080
Speaker 2: for the news. And don't get me wrong, I really

725
00:45:45,120 --> 00:45:50,560
Speaker 2: really enjoyed that for the vast majority of my time

726
00:45:50,640 --> 00:45:54,399
Speaker 2: in in media, and I'm helping people as well. So

727
00:45:54,880 --> 00:45:57,239
Speaker 2: and the sun shining through the window. I just had

728
00:45:57,239 --> 00:46:00,200
Speaker 2: a really lovely coffee. I think I'll go for a

729
00:46:00,239 --> 00:46:02,680
Speaker 2: swim later. I won't begun to the gym, but I

730
00:46:02,719 --> 00:46:06,480
Speaker 2: think I'll go for a swim. And that's one thing

731
00:46:06,520 --> 00:46:08,320
Speaker 2: I find as I get older. You know, I spoke

732
00:46:08,360 --> 00:46:11,600
Speaker 2: at the start, you asked me what grounds me? You know,

733
00:46:12,239 --> 00:46:18,479
Speaker 2: I'll I'll walk home from the pool. And it's weird,

734
00:46:18,560 --> 00:46:20,880
Speaker 2: isn't to think that I haven't been in the pool

735
00:46:20,920 --> 00:46:24,719
Speaker 2: as much or hardly ever, to be honest, But I

736
00:46:24,760 --> 00:46:27,719
Speaker 2: would say, let's throw out a number. If I've had

737
00:46:27,719 --> 00:46:33,000
Speaker 2: a swim three hundred thousand, seven hundred and sixty four

738
00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:37,440
Speaker 2: times in my life, I have got out of the

739
00:46:37,480 --> 00:46:43,719
Speaker 2: pool and felt better physically and significantly mentally. I have

740
00:46:43,840 --> 00:46:50,840
Speaker 2: felt better on every occasion. Wow, and big problems beforehand

741
00:46:52,400 --> 00:46:57,600
Speaker 2: were now little problems. And the bird song was just

742
00:46:57,680 --> 00:47:02,280
Speaker 2: that bit louder and I was noticing just the wind

743
00:47:02,719 --> 00:47:07,120
Speaker 2: just sort of passing around me and through the trees,

744
00:47:08,040 --> 00:47:13,799
Speaker 2: and I would notice people smiling. Yeah, and you can

745
00:47:13,840 --> 00:47:16,560
Speaker 2: never underestimate just to smile what it does, you know.

746
00:47:16,600 --> 00:47:23,040
Speaker 2: I was at a Beyond Blue event last year and

747
00:47:23,080 --> 00:47:28,360
Speaker 2: a woman was talking about, you know, she had struggled

748
00:47:28,360 --> 00:47:32,799
Speaker 2: with severe depression since before she was a teenager, and

749
00:47:32,880 --> 00:47:36,320
Speaker 2: she said, you know, on the days and weeks where

750
00:47:37,400 --> 00:47:43,120
Speaker 2: she's at her worst, it's the people around her, usually

751
00:47:43,160 --> 00:47:48,000
Speaker 2: complete strangers, that give her the confidence and the trust

752
00:47:48,120 --> 00:47:50,640
Speaker 2: that things will be good again. The people that wave

753
00:47:50,840 --> 00:47:55,319
Speaker 2: good morning, hello, how are you going have a great day.

754
00:47:55,840 --> 00:48:03,080
Speaker 2: It's those little morsels of of kindness that get her

755
00:48:03,880 --> 00:48:06,160
Speaker 2: through the darkest periods.

756
00:48:06,600 --> 00:48:10,759
Speaker 1: Hmmm, yeah, I love that. We've got to start to

757
00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:12,920
Speaker 1: wind up, But you better tell us what you're doing now,

758
00:48:13,040 --> 00:48:16,280
Speaker 1: because I mean, we've had a we've had a good update.

759
00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:19,360
Speaker 1: But what's got your attention and what's got your energy

760
00:48:19,400 --> 00:48:20,040
Speaker 1: these days?

761
00:48:20,600 --> 00:48:23,799
Speaker 2: Well? Isn't it funny how the way life works and

762
00:48:25,600 --> 00:48:27,960
Speaker 2: people listening know that, you know, sometimes you do things

763
00:48:28,040 --> 00:48:30,680
Speaker 2: and it just doesn't sort of jel it doesn't quite

764
00:48:30,680 --> 00:48:33,919
Speaker 2: feel right. And you know what I'm doing now? And

765
00:48:34,200 --> 00:48:38,680
Speaker 2: I would say, this is by far the most rewarding

766
00:48:38,760 --> 00:48:44,319
Speaker 2: and enjoyable activity I've ever done in my life. I'm

767
00:48:44,400 --> 00:48:53,480
Speaker 2: essentially doing I'm creating TV shows. Well I wouldn't TV shows.

768
00:48:54,000 --> 00:48:58,719
Speaker 2: Elements of TV shows just about people. So and what

769
00:48:58,760 --> 00:49:03,040
Speaker 2: it came about. It's called UNI And in this instance

770
00:49:03,520 --> 00:49:08,560
Speaker 2: the subheading is stories, so it's universal stories. So why

771
00:49:08,840 --> 00:49:13,840
Speaker 2: owe you like that you project? This is universal stories?

772
00:49:14,160 --> 00:49:18,280
Speaker 2: So it's meeting people and finding it about their stories.

773
00:49:18,560 --> 00:49:22,720
Speaker 2: You know a lot of the topics are universal love,

774
00:49:23,440 --> 00:49:30,040
Speaker 2: you know, family, food, this, travel, work. But what I

775
00:49:30,080 --> 00:49:34,279
Speaker 2: love is everyone has a unique story. And what I'm

776
00:49:34,320 --> 00:49:37,640
Speaker 2: focused on when I'm interviewing someone, I am purely focused

777
00:49:37,680 --> 00:49:41,360
Speaker 2: on them. So if I'm talking to you, I'm focused

778
00:49:41,400 --> 00:49:46,759
Speaker 2: on you, hence the name universal. So what I do

779
00:49:47,120 --> 00:49:50,360
Speaker 2: is I go out and you know, it's normally parents

780
00:49:50,480 --> 00:49:54,279
Speaker 2: or grandparents who you know, I suppose you know in

781
00:49:54,320 --> 00:49:57,399
Speaker 2: their latter years, and it came about. I'd love to say,

782
00:49:57,400 --> 00:50:01,920
Speaker 2: Craig that it was my idea, but a friend back

783
00:50:01,960 --> 00:50:03,960
Speaker 2: home wrang me out of the blue a couple of

784
00:50:04,000 --> 00:50:05,840
Speaker 2: years ago and said, would you be interested in interviewing

785
00:50:05,920 --> 00:50:10,399
Speaker 2: mum and dad? Now we did, and his father has

786
00:50:10,440 --> 00:50:15,919
Speaker 2: since passed and then his cousin contacted me a couple

787
00:50:16,000 --> 00:50:17,879
Speaker 2: of months later and I'm like, oh, you were talking

788
00:50:17,880 --> 00:50:20,960
Speaker 2: to Stuart he won the same thing. And he goes, no,

789
00:50:21,080 --> 00:50:23,640
Speaker 2: what and I said no, no, no, no, hang on, hang on,

790
00:50:24,520 --> 00:50:26,799
Speaker 2: you're telling me you've just thought of this as well.

791
00:50:26,880 --> 00:50:29,920
Speaker 2: He goes yeah, and then he couldn't believe it that

792
00:50:29,960 --> 00:50:32,440
Speaker 2: when his cousin had asked me to do the same thing,

793
00:50:32,880 --> 00:50:35,160
Speaker 2: and then another mate asked me to do it, and

794
00:50:35,160 --> 00:50:37,440
Speaker 2: it was that mate that said, hey, look, I think

795
00:50:38,440 --> 00:50:40,640
Speaker 2: I think if this is something that you really wanted

796
00:50:40,640 --> 00:50:45,000
Speaker 2: to sink your teeth in, people are going to love it.

797
00:50:45,440 --> 00:50:48,279
Speaker 2: And it all came about because that initial friend, Cray,

798
00:50:48,360 --> 00:50:50,960
Speaker 2: your friend of his, said that, you know, he doesn't

799
00:50:51,000 --> 00:50:53,680
Speaker 2: have regrets in life except for one, and that was

800
00:50:53,719 --> 00:50:56,400
Speaker 2: that he didn't he didn't capture his mum and dad

801
00:50:56,719 --> 00:51:02,800
Speaker 2: on camera. Their personality is then does the stories while

802
00:51:02,800 --> 00:51:06,600
Speaker 2: they were here and they have since passed away. So now,

803
00:51:07,320 --> 00:51:10,319
Speaker 2: to be quite frank, what do I do I have

804
00:51:10,719 --> 00:51:15,120
Speaker 2: afternoon tea or morning tea with people? Now there's a

805
00:51:15,160 --> 00:51:17,879
Speaker 2: food element here because I do love my food. We

806
00:51:17,880 --> 00:51:20,600
Speaker 2: were thinking of calling it a Slice of Life, but

807
00:51:20,600 --> 00:51:25,040
Speaker 2: it's universal stories, but we always start with a slice

808
00:51:25,080 --> 00:51:29,319
Speaker 2: of life because it's a slice of their life, and

809
00:51:29,920 --> 00:51:32,560
Speaker 2: so I get to try lots of different food, I

810
00:51:32,640 --> 00:51:35,960
Speaker 2: meet people. If anyone is interested, you can just jump

811
00:51:36,000 --> 00:51:42,839
Speaker 2: on the website Universal dot com dot au Yo Universal.

812
00:51:44,360 --> 00:51:46,880
Speaker 2: You can contact me that way and go to the bottom.

813
00:51:46,960 --> 00:51:51,200
Speaker 2: You'll see an interview that it's just a snippet of

814
00:51:51,280 --> 00:51:53,560
Speaker 2: a lovely couple. I met Colin and Peter. I only

815
00:51:53,560 --> 00:51:57,560
Speaker 2: met him probably between half an hour and an hour beforehand,

816
00:51:58,560 --> 00:52:01,960
Speaker 2: and we spoke for over an hour. And then what

817
00:52:02,000 --> 00:52:04,080
Speaker 2: we do We package it up. We have an intro,

818
00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:08,960
Speaker 2: we have animation, we use music, and it's I'm lucky

819
00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:11,680
Speaker 2: to have those contacts from a time in media. So

820
00:52:12,600 --> 00:52:17,919
Speaker 2: Mel the guru editor, we work together Channel ten her

821
00:52:18,080 --> 00:52:22,320
Speaker 2: life partner Craig Day production company. He's a done Cameron

822
00:52:22,480 --> 00:52:26,840
Speaker 2: works on shows like The Block and Master Chef Berg

823
00:52:27,040 --> 00:52:30,440
Speaker 2: is the gun animator. My partner Cassie is a graphic designer.

824
00:52:30,760 --> 00:52:36,000
Speaker 2: So we're all working together. Two well, we say that

825
00:52:36,120 --> 00:52:39,600
Speaker 2: anyone make the day of it, like, invite other family

826
00:52:39,640 --> 00:52:42,880
Speaker 2: members and that along. Because so therefore we can document

827
00:52:43,320 --> 00:52:48,440
Speaker 2: old memories and at the same time create new ones.

828
00:52:49,440 --> 00:52:52,719
Speaker 2: And the best bit of all I find, and I'm

829
00:52:52,719 --> 00:52:55,800
Speaker 2: really looking forward to be chatting to more and more friends,

830
00:52:55,840 --> 00:53:02,040
Speaker 2: particularly hearts in rural Victoria. Rural Australia always will be

831
00:53:02,440 --> 00:53:05,279
Speaker 2: is when I catch up with mates at home who

832
00:53:05,360 --> 00:53:08,600
Speaker 2: are off the good Irish Catholic stock, you know, the Ryan's,

833
00:53:08,640 --> 00:53:13,239
Speaker 2: the TUIs O'Brien's, and if it's not their immediate siblings,

834
00:53:13,280 --> 00:53:15,440
Speaker 2: it might be their parents' siblings and they could be

835
00:53:15,520 --> 00:53:21,400
Speaker 2: one of eight, ten, twelve, fourteen, you know with what

836
00:53:21,520 --> 00:53:26,600
Speaker 2: we're doing. The reality is these stories they're not four

837
00:53:26,680 --> 00:53:30,160
Speaker 2: really the parents or the grandparents. They're for the children,

838
00:53:30,600 --> 00:53:36,680
Speaker 2: the grandchildren, the great grandchildren going forward, and therefore it's

839
00:53:36,719 --> 00:53:39,440
Speaker 2: the entire family that invests in it.

840
00:53:40,640 --> 00:53:43,160
Speaker 1: Mate, just tell everyone that website again so they can

841
00:53:43,200 --> 00:53:43,680
Speaker 1: go and have a.

842
00:53:43,680 --> 00:53:51,240
Speaker 2: Squizz Universal dot com dot Au. You'll see the logo.

843
00:53:51,920 --> 00:53:53,480
Speaker 2: Why don't you look it up, Craig, then you can

844
00:53:53,520 --> 00:53:54,880
Speaker 2: see exactly what I'm talking about.

845
00:53:55,360 --> 00:53:57,719
Speaker 1: All right, well you just entertime the masses. I'm going

846
00:53:57,760 --> 00:54:00,960
Speaker 1: to jump on right now because I've have three screens

847
00:54:01,000 --> 00:54:04,480
Speaker 1: on my one screen, well, Brad, so it looks very good,

848
00:54:04,600 --> 00:54:08,480
Speaker 1: so everyone Www. Yet very functional, very clean. I like

849
00:54:08,520 --> 00:54:14,360
Speaker 1: a good clean website www y o Universal after that,

850
00:54:14,520 --> 00:54:19,279
Speaker 1: So it's you Universal dot com dot au stories about

851
00:54:19,320 --> 00:54:22,200
Speaker 1: capturing your loved ones on camera forever. We come to

852
00:54:22,239 --> 00:54:25,520
Speaker 1: you here and record priceless tales, anecdotes, life lessons and

853
00:54:25,560 --> 00:54:28,920
Speaker 1: package it up for future generation. Good idea, mate, good idea,

854
00:54:29,000 --> 00:54:31,880
Speaker 1: good service. Oh there's a little video at the bottom.

855
00:54:32,080 --> 00:54:36,000
Speaker 1: Nice scrolling. It's still I'm going to say, I'm going

856
00:54:36,000 --> 00:54:38,000
Speaker 1: to say it's a work in progress. But what's there

857
00:54:38,080 --> 00:54:39,080
Speaker 1: looks good and.

858
00:54:39,040 --> 00:54:42,520
Speaker 2: All the stuff thanks to you, brutal honesty.

859
00:54:42,840 --> 00:54:46,440
Speaker 1: Well, the feed it literally says, it literally says at

860
00:54:46,480 --> 00:54:48,960
Speaker 1: the bottom comes soon.

861
00:54:49,640 --> 00:54:51,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, it actually says that at the top two if

862
00:54:51,760 --> 00:54:56,480
Speaker 2: you were But you know, it's one of those ones

863
00:54:56,520 --> 00:54:58,560
Speaker 2: where you know, when people talk about you sort of

864
00:54:58,760 --> 00:55:02,680
Speaker 2: just get into it. You feel like, maybe are you

865
00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:06,040
Speaker 2: ready now? The website's not finished, but the feedback has

866
00:55:06,120 --> 00:55:11,120
Speaker 2: just been so overwhelming and people saying, oh, fantastic, fantastic,

867
00:55:11,160 --> 00:55:15,160
Speaker 2: And the reality is, you know what, our parents and

868
00:55:16,120 --> 00:55:18,239
Speaker 2: for those that are lucky enough to have grandparents or

869
00:55:18,320 --> 00:55:20,680
Speaker 2: older relatives, and you know what, it might be some

870
00:55:20,840 --> 00:55:23,960
Speaker 2: It might be a cousin that is going you know,

871
00:55:24,280 --> 00:55:27,200
Speaker 2: has a battle. It could be a friend, it could

872
00:55:27,239 --> 00:55:30,520
Speaker 2: be a volunteer at your sporting club. They deserve to

873
00:55:30,560 --> 00:55:31,920
Speaker 2: have their story told.

874
00:55:32,840 --> 00:55:36,560
Speaker 1: Make a good idea. All up here for thinking. My

875
00:55:36,680 --> 00:55:40,680
Speaker 1: mum says, well, good luck with all of that, and

876
00:55:41,960 --> 00:55:43,600
Speaker 1: thanks for coming to have a chat again. We need

877
00:55:43,640 --> 00:55:46,520
Speaker 1: to make it like a little bit shorter time frame

878
00:55:46,560 --> 00:55:50,440
Speaker 1: next time, as in not five years or three years apart.

879
00:55:51,640 --> 00:55:55,560
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, if I was just waiting for the invitation.

880
00:55:56,520 --> 00:55:58,880
Speaker 1: It's just been sitting by the phone.

881
00:56:00,680 --> 00:56:01,239
Speaker 2: All right, mate.

882
00:56:01,280 --> 00:56:03,319
Speaker 1: We appreciate you. Thank you so much for coming to

883
00:56:03,360 --> 00:56:07,000
Speaker 1: play on the You project again. I'll talk to you soon.

884
00:56:07,080 --> 00:56:10,000
Speaker 1: We need to have a coffee and we'll get together

885
00:56:10,080 --> 00:56:10,800
Speaker 1: again on the show.

886
00:56:11,040 --> 00:56:13,640
Speaker 2: Thanks mate. Yeah, and you know I'm going to finish

887
00:56:13,719 --> 00:56:16,680
Speaker 2: with what I call the power of the compliment. Well done, Craig.

888
00:56:16,719 --> 00:56:18,840
Speaker 2: You know the amount of people that you are helping

889
00:56:18,960 --> 00:56:23,600
Speaker 2: just by just chatting and putting yourself out there, So

890
00:56:23,719 --> 00:56:27,240
Speaker 2: to you and Melissa, and you know, I get feedback

891
00:56:27,280 --> 00:56:30,440
Speaker 2: from other people just saying that, you know, like the

892
00:56:30,560 --> 00:56:37,040
Speaker 2: medication helps me and friends and family help me. You

893
00:56:37,080 --> 00:56:39,640
Speaker 2: are helping a whole lot of people through this medium.

894
00:56:39,760 --> 00:56:43,040
Speaker 2: So well done, mate, It's great work.

895
00:56:43,560 --> 00:56:46,440
Speaker 1: Thank you mate. I genuinely appreciate that I have a

896
00:56:46,480 --> 00:56:49,080
Speaker 1: go all right, buddy, I'll talk to you soon, right,

897
00:56:49,320 --> 00:56:49,880
Speaker 1: Thanks Craig,