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Speaker 1: This is the fitz and with Kate Richie podcast.

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Speaker 2: Is your relationship stuck in a rut at the moment?

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Speaker 2: A relationship expert has listed the three red flags that

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Speaker 2: prove that your relationship is doomed. This is Professor Suzanne Degsteggsy.

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Speaker 2: She's a couple's therapist and she's listed the three flags.

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Speaker 1: Can we play a bit of a game? You got

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Speaker 1: some music for me there? Just that we can get into.

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Speaker 1: This is fun.

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Speaker 3: I mean this is assuming that people are into red flags.

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Speaker 3: I mean some people see a red flag can go oh,

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Speaker 3: this is right up by Ali. I feel like a

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Speaker 3: bit of hell this year.

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Speaker 4: What a dozens have to say? Man, oh that's not bad.

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Speaker 1: Here we go, okay.

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Speaker 2: The first one is if you live with your partner

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Speaker 2: but you subconsciously delay going home to them.

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Speaker 4: I thought that was normal.

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Speaker 1: Well tick for on this one. No, I know, I'm not.

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Speaker 4: We're all sat in the car out the.

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Speaker 3: Front, no y where we have I come on, Kate cues,

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Speaker 3: I don't get as far as the car out. I

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Speaker 3: just don't leave the.

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Speaker 1: Offer or that's the big one that they said.

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Speaker 2: If you delay leaving work, Kate and you stick around

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Speaker 2: for a bit longer, or you find excuses with nights

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Speaker 2: out with friends, your relationships termed.

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Speaker 4: Oh god, okay? Is that just the one red flag?

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Speaker 4: Is that it is that like one of them.

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Speaker 1: No second sign is not responding to texts. This is

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Speaker 1: a big one. I'm a big I like to.

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Speaker 2: Get back to text messages pretty quickly, and I've always

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Speaker 2: been really good with my wife. I just I'm not

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Speaker 2: a big fan of people who take ages to respond.

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Speaker 1: I think it's rude.

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Speaker 4: Mate, You couldn't brought up a more important point. I

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Speaker 4: think it's unbelievably rude. And to know that I sit

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Speaker 4: alongside someone who is famous for being a bad communicator,

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Speaker 4: not a message whip.

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Speaker 1: You're not an angel here?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: And also my husband.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but there's a lot of sexual strad.

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Speaker 5: What oh if that's if you think that what is

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Speaker 5: going on here is sexual chemistry, you need to go

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Speaker 5: to a head doctor.

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Speaker 1: And have yourself.

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Speaker 3: But I am pretty bad, FITZI I am, and I

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Speaker 3: and I have been criticized about this. Terrible in relationships

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Speaker 3: as well. Like one of my most common texts that

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Speaker 3: I receive is.

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Speaker 1: Are you alive?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: And you die today?

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Speaker 4: Question mark, question mark, question mark.

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Speaker 2: Do you know the number of a good head doctors. Okay,

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Speaker 2: so that's your second sign. The third red flag is

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Speaker 2: based around the future. Suzanne Eggsy's revealed that feelings of

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Speaker 2: positivity and hopefulness about the future should be high on

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Speaker 2: the relationship agender, rather than regrets about what you could

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Speaker 2: have been one massively, I could have I could have

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Speaker 2: kicked more goals, I could have done this to be

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Speaker 2: stuck here with you?

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Speaker 1: What if I'd married Jenny.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I was gonna be a hero.

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Speaker 3: I was going to be that guy, gonna gonna those

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Speaker 3: people I would have should have gonna gonna.

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Speaker 1: That is a big one. There are moments, don't get

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Speaker 1: me wrong.

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Speaker 2: There are moments where we we you know, we look

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Speaker 2: at each other and smile about the future, like when

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Speaker 2: the kids move out at home.

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Speaker 1: That's a big one.

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Speaker 4: But you don't You don't sit there with your partner

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Speaker 4: and think or even say out aloud. You don't sit

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Speaker 4: there and think, oh, gee, I wish i'd married that person.

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Speaker 3: I think sometimes.

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Speaker 4: I think I would have been far better off. Do

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Speaker 4: you know who? You know who does that? People that's

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Speaker 4: settled in relationships where they went you know what, I

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Speaker 4: may as well end up with them because there's nothing

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Speaker 4: else out there.

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Speaker 3: But I don't think that people justly set They do

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Speaker 3: not all the time.

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Speaker 4: I think all the time.

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Speaker 3: I think people can settle, but I don't think when

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Speaker 3: they're settling that they know it's settling. It just feels someway,

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Speaker 3: it feels safe. But I disagree. I think there are

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Speaker 3: people sitting in their laund rooms or maybe even at

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Speaker 3: the dinner table if they're not eating at the coffee

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Speaker 3: table in front of the TV, and they stare at

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Speaker 3: each other across their curried sausages and they hate.

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Speaker 4: They hate each other.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, courage sausages.

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Speaker 4: That's not the point of the story, the carriage sausages.

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Speaker 3: I mean, look, if you're eating courage sausages with someone

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Speaker 3: you hate, things could.

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Speaker 4: Be worse, really, and your breath's going to smell too,

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Speaker 4: But it's not a threat because you're not going anywhere

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Speaker 4: near them. Imagine getting into bed with someone and they

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Speaker 4: just roll over and don't even give you a kiss

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Speaker 4: good night or say I love your.

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Speaker 3: Oh people, that's happening all over the country.

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Speaker 4: There's a there's a real separation going on at the moment,

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Speaker 4: isn't there truckloads of couples still coming out at the

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Speaker 4: back of COVID. They want more.

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Speaker 2: It's the modern relationship, mate, you can imagine. Marriage counselors

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Speaker 2: are just on fire.

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Speaker 4: I grew up with a girl who I've known for

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Speaker 4: a very long time, and I bumped into her the

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Speaker 4: other day.

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Speaker 2: Well, if you grew up with it, well, if you

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Speaker 2: grew up with it, you obviously have known her for all.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and she is like a very popular divorce lawyer.

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Speaker 4: I don't even know what are they? Family lawyer? Is

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Speaker 4: that what you call a divorce anyway?

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Speaker 1: She does mean popular, you mean busy, busy, flatmacker.

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Speaker 4: And you know what happens. Couples realize that they're going

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Speaker 4: down that path. They both know that she's the best

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Speaker 4: in town as well, and they race to get their

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Speaker 4: first before the other one does so.

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Speaker 1: Then you say, sorry, you can't use her.

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Speaker 4: I've gone with that person. She's representing me.

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Speaker 1: Are you getting it?

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Speaker 2: Are you getting satisfaction when you look at your bank

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Speaker 2: account every day?

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Speaker 4: Though?

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Speaker 2: Are you getting satisfaction when you're representing people who are

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Speaker 2: going through such a Do.

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Speaker 4: You know what she said too? She said, the first

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Speaker 4: thing I tell people if they come to me is

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Speaker 4: to get off the grog, Get off grog, get off

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Speaker 4: any drugs, get off any bad substances that you might take,

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Speaker 4: so you can be clear. So you can be clear,

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Speaker 4: because what happens is if that person wants to say, well,

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Speaker 4: hang on a minute, he's a bad parent, he abuses substances, Well,

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Speaker 4: then they have the right to request a drug test,

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Speaker 4: which can be done via a hair strand. So you

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Speaker 4: send off a strand of your hair, so if you're

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Speaker 4: clear from the moment you go there for that.

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Speaker 1: Divorce, How am I going to send off your strand?

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Speaker 4: A short and curly mate.

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Speaker 3: I'm not going to have to come for you from you?

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Speaker 1: Can I ask? Can they use one of those heirs

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Speaker 1: to test you? Of course, well, I would imagine.

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Speaker 3: So I think it's very sad that she's advising people

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Speaker 3: to stay off alcohol and band substances or legal substances

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Speaker 3: purely so that they don't get in trouble with their partner,

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Speaker 3: rather than that it's probably best for everyone involved, including

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Speaker 3: the chike.

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Speaker 4: Well, I mean a probably well said cod and best

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Speaker 4: thing said all day all year, not that it won't

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Speaker 4: be for the rest of the year. That could be better.

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Speaker 4: We don't know. But that's what she said, and it's

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Speaker 4: like people are racing to her. She's never been busier.

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Speaker 1: What right, what proper races? But there's a start line

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Speaker 1: in that.

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Speaker 4: And they go bank, go get a get.

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Speaker 5: I Got a.

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Speaker 4: Fitzen Whipper with Kate Ritchie is a Nova podcast walk

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Speaker 4: great shows like this. Download the Nova Player by the

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Speaker 4: app Store or Google playing the