WEBVTT - 447 days in hospital! 0:00:05.921 --> 0:00:13.161 Appogiae production. Hi, my name's Beck Woodbine and welcome to 0:00:13.201 --> 0:00:14.441 Tenderness for Nurses. 0:00:15.041 --> 0:00:18.841 I'm grateful for the person that I have the opportunity 0:00:18.881 --> 0:00:22.480 to be, so I hid it and parked it for 0:00:22.561 --> 0:00:25.681 Nellie four years. We always have free will, We always 0:00:25.721 --> 0:00:27.641 get to choose. We are autonomous. 0:00:28.281 --> 0:00:31.361 Hi everyone, thank you for tuning back in to Tenderness 0:00:31.361 --> 0:00:35.321 for Nurses today. I have the amazing Kathy with me, 0:00:35.521 --> 0:00:38.321 who I have met was the end of last year, 0:00:38.961 --> 0:00:42.760 September September last year, as she has moved into the 0:00:42.801 --> 0:00:45.961 same precinct I leave in and we just hit it 0:00:45.961 --> 0:00:49.441 off straight away. Actually, if I'm really honest, I saw 0:00:50.480 --> 0:00:54.161 one of her support people, was it your sister. 0:00:54.081 --> 0:00:56.961 My sister Susie Susie that was. 0:00:56.881 --> 0:00:58.840 Trying to make a walk, and I was like, give 0:00:58.881 --> 0:01:01.161 her a hand, and I raced up being you know, 0:01:01.241 --> 0:01:03.840 nessy Beck. She felt so bad, but I was like, 0:01:03.881 --> 0:01:06.441 do you need a hand? And we've got chatting and 0:01:06.681 --> 0:01:10.201 we chat constantly, yes, ever since. But I'm going to 0:01:10.360 --> 0:01:12.161 read you. I asked Kat to send me through a 0:01:12.161 --> 0:01:16.601 little bio today and honestly, I had a really good 0:01:16.681 --> 0:01:20.520 laugh when I was reading this. Kathy Peel has never 0:01:20.601 --> 0:01:24.360 quite grown up. After a lesson in stellar academic career 0:01:24.481 --> 0:01:27.161 as a border at one of Brisbane's girls' schools, she 0:01:27.241 --> 0:01:30.681 floated around for a few years doing a variety of jobs, badly, 0:01:31.761 --> 0:01:34.481 notably working for her father, who was a dentist. He 0:01:34.521 --> 0:01:37.641 fired her, which was fair because she kept closing her 0:01:37.640 --> 0:01:40.560 eyes and wincing whenever he used a drill, resulting in 0:01:40.640 --> 0:01:44.561 patients having their tongue sucked into the whimsically named saliva rejector. 0:01:45.360 --> 0:01:47.800 Kathy has an arts degree and holds a post grad 0:01:47.881 --> 0:01:52.641 qualification in English literature and public administration, so nothing practical, 0:01:52.801 --> 0:01:56.521 which could be her life subtitle. She has been a 0:01:56.561 --> 0:02:00.521 tafe teacher, worked in QPS Queens and Police Service, disastered 0:02:00.521 --> 0:02:03.201 a response in the Department of Emergency Service as a 0:02:03.241 --> 0:02:07.041 protocol officer for the two thousand e Comgames, and is 0:02:07.121 --> 0:02:11.161 now professionally delightful and very occasionally quite clever as a 0:02:11.241 --> 0:02:14.641 manager in the public service. And this is the bit 0:02:14.680 --> 0:02:19.280 I love before getting asked cancer in twenty twenty. Kathy 0:02:19.441 --> 0:02:23.081 was an active member of the Brisbane cycling community, including 0:02:23.121 --> 0:02:26.361 the women's only Facebook group Brisbane Chicks who Ride Bikes 0:02:26.401 --> 0:02:29.001 with four and a half thousand members. Kathy used to 0:02:29.041 --> 0:02:32.081 take absolute beginners out on rides with some of the 0:02:32.240 --> 0:02:35.201 other more experienced riders to show them safe and flatways 0:02:35.240 --> 0:02:38.680 to get around Brisbane using bike paths and quiet backstreets. 0:02:39.161 --> 0:02:42.801 Kathy also used to provide highly unprofessional social media coverage 0:02:42.841 --> 0:02:45.761 with her good friend Jordana at the Women's tour down 0:02:45.800 --> 0:02:48.800 Under an Adelaide. Juldana and Kathy once got so drunk 0:02:48.921 --> 0:02:52.161 at a cellar door tasting they missed the end of 0:02:52.201 --> 0:02:56.481 the race. After escaping hospital after four hundred and forty 0:02:56.520 --> 0:02:58.881 seven days, Kathy was in the private system for around 0:02:58.921 --> 0:03:01.961 six months and then moved to the public sector to 0:03:02.121 --> 0:03:05.680 under take rehab. She is now struggling to figure out 0:03:05.680 --> 0:03:08.960 her new normal post cancer treatment as immutenist and resentful 0:03:09.001 --> 0:03:12.561 member of the Chair and Wheels Society. Chair with Wheel Society, 0:03:13.121 --> 0:03:16.201 Kathy's written a blog about her experience on the public Facebook, 0:03:16.481 --> 0:03:19.721 an unsatisfactory turn of events. She is also a pet 0:03:19.761 --> 0:03:22.841 guardian for a resentful and ungrateful rescue cat called Bumble, 0:03:22.921 --> 0:03:25.361 who I have to say I love, but her true 0:03:25.401 --> 0:03:29.241 calling is to befriend my glorious dog Lola. 0:03:29.601 --> 0:03:33.000 Yes I far. That is possibly the least successful campaign 0:03:33.041 --> 0:03:36.841 of twenty twenty four, so ask cancer. Ask cancer. That's 0:03:36.841 --> 0:03:39.161 a very technical term. I'm glad you talked about it. 0:03:39.361 --> 0:03:43.841 Okay, So how did you know to go and see someone? 0:03:44.081 --> 0:03:47.201 Well in surprising news because you've got a photo up 0:03:47.201 --> 0:03:49.641 and stuff. People will be astounded to learn that I'm 0:03:49.681 --> 0:03:53.041 over fifty. I look like I'm thirty. So I got 0:03:53.841 --> 0:03:56.841 that postal thing and they said, please do a pool 0:03:56.881 --> 0:03:57.401 and send. 0:03:57.241 --> 0:03:57.921 It off to us. 0:03:58.321 --> 0:04:02.801 So I did all of the stuff, and I got 0:04:02.841 --> 0:04:04.641 all of these phone calls and you must go and 0:04:04.641 --> 0:04:09.161 see a immediately. So I went and had a colonoscope 0:04:09.841 --> 0:04:14.720 on Monday, and I woke up in the afternoon and 0:04:14.761 --> 0:04:17.281 they said, you have cancer. We've got you seeing a 0:04:17.321 --> 0:04:22.241 surgeon on Wednesday, and you'll probably be operated on Friday. 0:04:23.361 --> 0:04:26.440 My dad was a surgeon, my mum. I come from 0:04:26.440 --> 0:04:28.481 a very medical family, so I knew that if I'm 0:04:28.481 --> 0:04:32.561 seeing someone this quickly, something is wrong. So I had 0:04:32.601 --> 0:04:36.880 no symptoms, I had no issues whatsoever. So off I went. 0:04:36.961 --> 0:04:42.041 I met this quite pleasant surgeon on the Wednesday, who said, 0:04:42.041 --> 0:04:44.440 I'm not operating you on the Friday because it's I 0:04:44.481 --> 0:04:46.440 think it's stage four and you're going to die. You 0:04:46.521 --> 0:04:50.241 need to have your affairs in order, and they actually 0:04:50.481 --> 0:04:53.721 say you need to have your affairs in order. And 0:04:53.761 --> 0:04:58.361 I had this incredible hot flush go from the left 0:04:58.361 --> 0:05:00.080 hand side of me to the right hand side of me, 0:05:00.121 --> 0:05:05.601 which was obviously adrenaline or something, and I was yeah, 0:05:05.721 --> 0:05:09.361 and suddenly I had cancer. So then he took it 0:05:09.401 --> 0:05:15.601 to his multidisciplinary team and they did rady. I had 0:05:15.601 --> 0:05:20.241 to do radiography or radiation treatment at the PA. I 0:05:20.320 --> 0:05:23.200 was a private patient in the public system at the PA, 0:05:23.681 --> 0:05:29.841 and I did cancer treatment privately with chemotherapy, and my 0:05:29.921 --> 0:05:33.121 sister and I didn't go to the chemotherapy orientation day, 0:05:33.521 --> 0:05:35.361 so they kept saying this is going to happen and 0:05:35.361 --> 0:05:37.161 you're going to feel this way, and we're thinking, this 0:05:37.320 --> 0:05:42.481 is awful. So I had radiation and chemotherapy and then 0:05:42.481 --> 0:05:49.041 I had an operation done. They put a temporary iliostomy 0:05:49.081 --> 0:05:56.080 in and everything was fine. About twelve months later, I 0:05:56.161 --> 0:05:59.121 got very sick. I had chemotherapy and radiation sickness. I 0:05:59.161 --> 0:06:02.161 was going blind. I was supposed to do twelve rounds 0:06:02.161 --> 0:06:04.561 of chemotherapy. They had to reduce it to six because 0:06:04.601 --> 0:06:07.441 I nearly did, which was a bit dramatic. So then 0:06:07.880 --> 0:06:10.921 I was feeling fine. I went back to. I went 0:06:10.961 --> 0:06:14.001 back in to see my doctor again about ten months 0:06:14.041 --> 0:06:17.840 later after I'd had this operation and the recovery and stuff, 0:06:18.201 --> 0:06:22.561 and I had a recurrence and then things got really serious, 0:06:22.721 --> 0:06:25.801 so I had to have what's called a total pelvic exoneration, 0:06:26.001 --> 0:06:29.601 so basically every organ from my belly button down was removed, 0:06:30.561 --> 0:06:33.601 and they said, best case scenario is you'll have a limp. 0:06:33.681 --> 0:06:37.001 Worst case scenario you'll be in a wheelchair, And sadly, 0:06:37.001 --> 0:06:38.081 I'm worst case scenario. 0:06:38.681 --> 0:06:42.441 So, yeah, so I had cancer spread. When you say 0:06:42.440 --> 0:06:45.961 you had everything removed, we're talking uterus, ovaries, everything. 0:06:46.001 --> 0:06:50.960 Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, labia, everything glitter as everything went bladder. 0:06:52.041 --> 0:06:54.760 So I'm now the proud owner of a double ostome 0:06:55.001 --> 0:06:59.561 bag kit, which is really confronting. They removed part of 0:06:59.601 --> 0:07:03.681 my tailbone as well, cut my satica nerve and stuff 0:07:03.721 --> 0:07:06.161 like that, because the recurrence was right at the back 0:07:06.201 --> 0:07:08.641 of my pelvis, so they went from the front inn 0:07:08.681 --> 0:07:10.681 and just took everything out. By the time they went 0:07:10.721 --> 0:07:14.641 in to take the stuff out, the cancer had moved 0:07:14.681 --> 0:07:17.681 to my ovaries and had gone into different parts of 0:07:17.761 --> 0:07:19.281 my bow as well. 0:07:19.401 --> 0:07:22.401 So you had no signs or symptoms, and if it 0:07:22.481 --> 0:07:24.561 hadn't a been for you doing the Pooh test. 0:07:24.801 --> 0:07:27.521 I'd be dead, is that right? Yeah? Yeah, I was. 0:07:27.681 --> 0:07:31.241 I was totally asymptomatic. And is that common with that 0:07:31.281 --> 0:07:32.521 form of cos I don't believe. 0:07:32.521 --> 0:07:35.641 So I think that the problem was I actually, before 0:07:35.681 --> 0:07:38.121 all of this happened, I was really very fit and 0:07:38.161 --> 0:07:40.121 I was an indurance athlete and stuff like that, so 0:07:40.161 --> 0:07:41.641 I used I was used to having a lot of 0:07:41.681 --> 0:07:44.041 aches and pains in my body. I was used to 0:07:44.081 --> 0:07:47.241 getting dehydrated because I'd be out in mountain bikes all 0:07:47.321 --> 0:07:49.841 day and come home and feel a bit rat. But 0:07:50.281 --> 0:07:53.441 I had no symptoms like I had no Yeah, I 0:07:53.601 --> 0:07:55.641 just I was just living my life. 0:07:55.961 --> 0:08:00.761 Wow did they offer I mean, that's all except for 0:08:00.841 --> 0:08:03.481 confronting and I know you're really close with your friends 0:08:03.521 --> 0:08:07.801 and your family. Yep. Was counseling and that sort of thing. Yeah, 0:08:07.961 --> 0:08:10.201 and they keep offering it to me and you didn't take. 0:08:10.521 --> 0:08:13.641 Absolutely not. I don't want to be part of the 0:08:13.721 --> 0:08:17.720 cancer club. I found that it was very when I 0:08:17.801 --> 0:08:21.401 because I've done radiation twice now and chemotherapy twice, and 0:08:22.041 --> 0:08:24.801 both times were pretty bad. And the more I went 0:08:24.801 --> 0:08:28.241 in for chemotherapy, the more muteness I became. So I 0:08:28.321 --> 0:08:30.561 had like these T shirts it said sorry, I'm late. 0:08:30.641 --> 0:08:33.721 I didn't want to come, and people would laugh thinking 0:08:33.761 --> 0:08:35.641 I was joking, but I meant it with every fiver 0:08:35.801 --> 0:08:39.041 of my being. And I had a big headband that 0:08:39.161 --> 0:08:40.881 was a sleep mask that my nephew brought for me, 0:08:40.881 --> 0:08:44.761 and it said emotionally emotionally exhausted. Because I didn't want 0:08:44.761 --> 0:08:46.801 to talk to anybody. I didn't want to go into 0:08:46.841 --> 0:08:50.801 these radiation and hear from Clive from Gatton about what 0:08:50.881 --> 0:08:55.161 he was doing, and Sarah from Crow's Nest about what 0:08:55.241 --> 0:08:58.361 was happening with her. I didn't want to be part 0:08:58.441 --> 0:09:00.841 of the cancer club. I just want to I just 0:09:00.841 --> 0:09:04.641 want my life back. So but I was also very lucky. 0:09:04.681 --> 0:09:07.721 I've had a very very good mental health professional walking 0:09:07.761 --> 0:09:10.281 with me the whole way, who was already looking, who 0:09:10.321 --> 0:09:13.361 was already part of my medical team before all of 0:09:13.361 --> 0:09:18.281 this happened. So I've leant very heavily on him. I 0:09:18.361 --> 0:09:21.321 was talking to one of the junior consultants and I 0:09:21.361 --> 0:09:23.281 said something like blah blah blah, and I went to 0:09:23.281 --> 0:09:25.641 sleep and I woke up and I was mutilated. He 0:09:25.721 --> 0:09:29.841 was extremely anxious that I was discussing my condition, that 0:09:29.921 --> 0:09:32.121 I was mutilated. But to be honest with you, I was. 0:09:32.641 --> 0:09:34.481 I went to sleep and I was fine. I could walk, 0:09:34.521 --> 0:09:36.201 I could do everything. And I woke up I couldn't 0:09:36.201 --> 0:09:39.881 walk anymore and I had huge, great, big open scars 0:09:39.921 --> 0:09:41.961 all down my front, all down my back. I was 0:09:42.001 --> 0:09:44.881 in a kman for eight weeks after my second big operation. 0:09:45.361 --> 0:09:49.081 So I went to sleep I think in June, and 0:09:49.161 --> 0:09:52.321 I woke up and sort of the Tour de France 0:09:52.401 --> 0:09:54.761 was sort of on. Wow, Yeah it was crazy. 0:09:55.241 --> 0:09:56.241 At least you woke up to that. 0:09:56.481 --> 0:09:58.801 Well it was, it was good, But the problem was 0:09:58.801 --> 0:10:01.601 I actually didn't know where I was, so I had mania. 0:10:01.721 --> 0:10:03.521 When you is that what it is? 0:10:03.601 --> 0:10:04.241 Yeah? 0:10:04.321 --> 0:10:06.081 Yeah, I was in I was in the hospital. I 0:10:06.081 --> 0:10:07.961 was in intensive care for so long and on so 0:10:08.001 --> 0:10:10.721 many world drugs. I wake up and I had mania happening. 0:10:10.801 --> 0:10:13.121 And when I was in the private system, I had 0:10:13.201 --> 0:10:15.401 five consultants. It would come and see me every day, 0:10:15.801 --> 0:10:20.721 and that was really kind, super beautiful dressed wearing suits 0:10:20.761 --> 0:10:24.401 and ties and everything, and they were so kind to me. 0:10:24.681 --> 0:10:28.121 And the guy that looked after that sort of component 0:10:28.281 --> 0:10:31.401 was astounded because I had Usually when people have a mania, 0:10:31.401 --> 0:10:34.761 they'll have like I had hallucinations and stuff, and the 0:10:34.881 --> 0:10:36.961 nurses would say, oh, you know, we're going to give 0:10:37.001 --> 0:10:38.241 you a bed bath now, and I say, do you 0:10:38.281 --> 0:10:41.241 think we should not ask everyone else to leave? And 0:10:41.281 --> 0:10:44.761 it was just the nurses and me. But I had 0:10:44.801 --> 0:10:46.881 on my left hand side, I had a woman dressed 0:10:46.881 --> 0:10:51.321 in regency like sort of pride and preadjuiced sort of clothes, 0:10:51.801 --> 0:10:54.161 sitting there quietly tap a string. And I had this 0:10:54.321 --> 0:10:57.281 cat that would jump out of the TV that would 0:10:57.281 --> 0:10:59.321 sit on my lap. And I had all of these soldiers. 0:10:59.361 --> 0:11:01.561 But he said, the remarkable thing was that the soldiers 0:11:01.601 --> 0:11:04.641 weren't attacking me. They were guarding me. It's very unusual 0:11:04.681 --> 0:11:07.281 for people who have a mania to have people who 0:11:07.281 --> 0:11:10.041 are guarding them. And I said to my sister. 0:11:10.241 --> 0:11:10.961 They were angels. 0:11:11.041 --> 0:11:12.881 Well, I said to my sister later, I said, just 0:11:13.041 --> 0:11:16.001 freak sitting in the chair next to me, And she 0:11:16.081 --> 0:11:18.801 said that's where we used to sit. Because I've an 0:11:18.841 --> 0:11:21.561 English lit degree and Jane Austen is my favorite author. 0:11:22.201 --> 0:11:24.561 When I was in intensive care and was really fretful 0:11:24.601 --> 0:11:28.001 and I couldn't couldn't calm me down, my friends and 0:11:28.081 --> 0:11:31.961 family would read Jane Austen and they all said, on 0:11:31.961 --> 0:11:34.481 my left and I had one particular girlfriend who I'm 0:11:34.521 --> 0:11:36.521 really good friends with, and she flew up from Melbourne 0:11:36.561 --> 0:11:40.121 in the morning, walked straight into intensive care where you know, 0:11:40.401 --> 0:11:42.681 I sat down read Jane Austin to me all day 0:11:42.721 --> 0:11:43.281 and went home. 0:11:43.841 --> 0:11:46.281 See that that speaks volumes to me about the type 0:11:46.321 --> 0:11:49.641 of person you are. I just I'm just so lucky, 0:11:49.921 --> 0:11:52.481 so glad to have the friends and family that I have, 0:11:52.601 --> 0:11:53.681 and they've stuck around. 0:11:53.721 --> 0:11:55.761 I mean, I've been sick for years now. I mean 0:11:55.801 --> 0:11:57.401 I was in hospital for a year and a half 0:11:57.681 --> 0:12:01.041 and they all still like me. Because it's true, you 0:12:01.161 --> 0:12:05.481 get super invested in yourself and kind of you know, 0:12:05.601 --> 0:12:07.721 blah blah, and that was so I had to work 0:12:07.761 --> 0:12:10.641 hard on to not become self absorbed exactly. 0:12:10.841 --> 0:12:14.841 You're insightful of that and you're aware of it. And 0:12:14.921 --> 0:12:19.281 I do think it's easy to become self absorbed when 0:12:19.321 --> 0:12:22.361 you're in pain, when everything is about to you, when 0:12:22.361 --> 0:12:26.041 you're in that hospital bed, and rightly so, you're souper sick. 0:12:26.401 --> 0:12:31.601 But it's quite interesting that you were aware enough to go, Okay, 0:12:32.241 --> 0:12:35.281 I need to not make it all about me, and 0:12:35.321 --> 0:12:37.681 you like that at home, like when we would get 0:12:37.721 --> 0:12:40.881 run into each other. You're quite happy to chat about 0:12:40.921 --> 0:12:43.961 everything else and everyone else, and we turn the subject 0:12:44.041 --> 0:12:45.601 to you and you'll talk a little bit, and then 0:12:45.641 --> 0:12:47.280 you always seguay out. 0:12:47.481 --> 0:12:49.961 Because it's not You've got no good news. That's the 0:12:50.001 --> 0:12:52.081 problem is you don't want to be Nancy no good 0:12:52.121 --> 0:12:54.161 news all the time. I don't know who Nancy is, 0:12:55.841 --> 0:12:57.881 but I think it's and I think a lot of it, too, 0:12:57.961 --> 0:13:00.801 is because I was in a relationship for twenty years 0:13:00.881 --> 0:13:03.521 and at breakdown before I got sick, And to be 0:13:03.561 --> 0:13:05.561 honest with you, I'm kind of glad I was by 0:13:05.601 --> 0:13:08.721 myself and I didn't have a partner when I was 0:13:09.161 --> 0:13:11.681 well since I've been sick, because I've only had to 0:13:11.681 --> 0:13:15.081 look after myself and you can, oh, she's the worst 0:13:15.201 --> 0:13:18.961 bumbles devil, But it's that whole thing about if you've 0:13:18.961 --> 0:13:20.961 got a partner, you also have to see how they're 0:13:21.001 --> 0:13:23.801 going and how are they coping, and are they feeling 0:13:23.841 --> 0:13:25.801 resentful and all of that sort of stuff. Where Also, 0:13:25.761 --> 0:13:28.561 I had my sister who in the blog I called 0:13:28.601 --> 0:13:31.761 the Goat. She was originally the MVP for the Most 0:13:31.801 --> 0:13:34.521 Vasual Player, but she's been promoted to the Goat and 0:13:34.641 --> 0:13:39.001 Marvelous Paul, her husband and Arnie Margaret, who's ninety three now. 0:13:39.001 --> 0:13:41.601 She's my consult physiotherapist. She was my dad and sister 0:13:42.041 --> 0:13:44.481 and mother Meg and the fire and I had all 0:13:44.481 --> 0:13:47.201 these people that loved me and were around me all 0:13:47.201 --> 0:13:50.441 the time, but they also had, like Susie had her 0:13:50.481 --> 0:13:53.481 own family outside of that, you know, so I wasn't 0:13:53.521 --> 0:13:58.241 the primary focus focus. And it also lets Susie and 0:13:58.321 --> 0:14:00.441 Mum and everyone go home and say, God, I'm sick 0:14:00.441 --> 0:14:02.321 of cancer. I'm sick of too. Can we not talk 0:14:02.361 --> 0:14:04.921 about my child or my sister because I'm sick of her? 0:14:05.161 --> 0:14:05.761 She sucks. 0:14:06.121 --> 0:14:07.321 You probably get sick of yourself. 0:14:07.521 --> 0:14:10.241 I totally do. Absolutely not that interesting. 0:14:11.001 --> 0:14:13.841 After all your surgeries, yes, did they have to build 0:14:13.881 --> 0:14:16.161 up your muscle strength and then after all those long 0:14:16.201 --> 0:14:17.881 stints in I see you and that sort of thing. 0:14:17.921 --> 0:14:20.641 Initially, Yeah, So when I was I was in the 0:14:20.681 --> 0:14:24.041 private sector and I had my own room and my 0:14:24.081 --> 0:14:27.201 own nurses and everything, and the physios would come to 0:14:27.241 --> 0:14:29.441 me for an hour a day into my room and 0:14:29.481 --> 0:14:31.801 they brought this like it was kind of like some 0:14:31.841 --> 0:14:35.201 sort of torture device called a tilt table, and I 0:14:35.241 --> 0:14:36.801 had to be I think it was like a ho 0:14:36.921 --> 0:14:38.761 a mat. It was a hover mat that hovermaped me 0:14:38.801 --> 0:14:40.601 onto the thing, and then that put me onto this 0:14:40.641 --> 0:14:43.281 tilt table and they'd sort of wench me up to 0:14:43.441 --> 0:14:46.041 ninety degrees and I would get to thirty degrees and 0:14:46.081 --> 0:14:49.241 start vomiting, which was really attractive because I hadn't had 0:14:49.281 --> 0:14:53.521 my hair washed it about three weeks. Actually, pro tip, 0:14:53.601 --> 0:14:55.681 if you've got anyone who's going into hospital for a 0:14:55.681 --> 0:14:57.841 long time, you need to actually learn how to French braid, 0:14:58.001 --> 0:15:01.721 and you can just French brade blade their plats. Yeah, 0:15:01.801 --> 0:15:03.681 and if you haven't got a sister who can do that, 0:15:03.721 --> 0:15:05.721 Susie learned how to do that when was in detention 0:15:05.801 --> 0:15:08.841 at high school. But if you haven't got a sister 0:15:08.881 --> 0:15:10.401 that can do it, you need to make friends with 0:15:10.441 --> 0:15:12.481 girls who are harsy people because they can do the 0:15:12.481 --> 0:15:15.121 same braids that they did on their horses, because it 0:15:15.201 --> 0:15:17.881 just keeps it off your face and it doesn't matter 0:15:17.881 --> 0:15:19.801 how greasy it gets. But so i'd gone too the 0:15:19.841 --> 0:15:23.801 tilt table, so I and I used to have to 0:15:24.161 --> 0:15:27.081 after a few weeks because nobody knew what was happening. 0:15:27.321 --> 0:15:31.201 They couldn't understand why I wasn't recovering very well. And 0:15:31.281 --> 0:15:33.081 after a few weeks I studied using this thing called 0:15:33.121 --> 0:15:36.921 the Sarah steady, which is a torture device where you 0:15:36.961 --> 0:15:39.241 sort of have to sort of bend ford and stand 0:15:39.321 --> 0:15:41.441 up by yourself and push yourself up and then you'd 0:15:41.481 --> 0:15:44.161 sit down like you're on a chariot and they move 0:15:44.201 --> 0:15:45.921 you to the bathroom while they move you to the 0:15:45.961 --> 0:15:47.641 shower and stuff like that. So it took me, I 0:15:47.681 --> 0:15:50.761 think about six weeks to learn how to use a 0:15:50.841 --> 0:15:53.521 Sarah steady, and that was a too assist. So by 0:15:53.561 --> 0:15:55.921 the time I went, I could not go to rehab 0:15:55.921 --> 0:15:57.961 while I still had a pump dressing or what are 0:15:57.961 --> 0:16:01.321 the vacuum dressings, and they have the they've got the 0:16:01.481 --> 0:16:04.201 huge dressings, and they have that machine that sucks all 0:16:04.201 --> 0:16:05.561 your bits and pieces together. 0:16:06.081 --> 0:16:08.841 I don't know anymore because it's been it was. 0:16:09.281 --> 0:16:11.081 Kind of it was something, and I had one on 0:16:11.121 --> 0:16:12.641 the front and one on the back, and so they 0:16:12.681 --> 0:16:16.881 sort of were using such to suck skin together. So 0:16:16.921 --> 0:16:19.601 I couldn't have any of those. And I need to 0:16:19.681 --> 0:16:22.321 be on a Sarah study before I could go into rehab, 0:16:22.841 --> 0:16:25.681 so I need to rehab. So I got there and 0:16:26.441 --> 0:16:30.121 very unwill. When I was first emitted into the public system, 0:16:30.121 --> 0:16:33.081 I got sepsis and died a couple of times, which 0:16:33.121 --> 0:16:37.601 made everyone very nervous. So yeah, I had to learn. 0:16:37.721 --> 0:16:40.001 So I lost I think something about thirty eight plos 0:16:40.041 --> 0:16:41.761 and most of it was muscle mass. And because I 0:16:41.841 --> 0:16:45.001 was a cyclist and super super fit, I used to 0:16:45.001 --> 0:16:50.401 have these massive quads and massive, massive glutes and these 0:16:50.601 --> 0:16:52.921 huge carves. I used to have to wear special boots 0:16:53.721 --> 0:16:57.121 because my cars were so big. So yeah, I lost 0:16:57.161 --> 0:16:58.001 a lot of weight. 0:16:58.401 --> 0:17:02.361 Did they think you being so fit helped your recr. 0:17:03.761 --> 0:17:07.080 One of the actually it it was actually an impediment. 0:17:07.161 --> 0:17:10.921 At one point, as an endurance athlete who pushed herself, 0:17:11.201 --> 0:17:13.801 I would get to the redline and continue. So with 0:17:13.880 --> 0:17:17.721 the physios, I'd say do it again. And I wasn't 0:17:17.761 --> 0:17:20.041 listening to my body because it was saying it was tired, 0:17:20.441 --> 0:17:25.281 because I was used to disregarding those messages. So and 0:17:25.521 --> 0:17:29.161 I'm my own worst enemy. I'm highly competitive with myself. 0:17:29.600 --> 0:17:32.761 So if I would do two physio sessions a day 0:17:32.921 --> 0:17:37.321 and completely wreck myself, so I didn't, and. 0:17:37.281 --> 0:17:40.281 That can actually make your recovery longer. Yeah, I sucked 0:17:40.321 --> 0:17:41.080 at recovery. 0:17:41.120 --> 0:17:42.840 I just was not cool. And then I had a 0:17:43.640 --> 0:17:46.441 pressure saw, so I had to lie on my side 0:17:46.481 --> 0:17:48.600 in bed for a week, and I cried the whole 0:17:48.600 --> 0:17:51.401 week because I wanted to be up doing physio. 0:17:51.360 --> 0:17:54.521 And where was the where was where was that pressure? Weed? 0:17:55.120 --> 0:17:57.241 It was sort of you know when you've got undies 0:17:57.281 --> 0:18:01.281 on and where the elastic goes on between your bum 0:18:01.080 --> 0:18:04.801 and the top of your thigh. Because I had, I 0:18:04.840 --> 0:18:07.841 have no feeling there anymore. So somebody I could go 0:18:07.880 --> 0:18:10.041 to if I could still walk, I could walk to 0:18:10.160 --> 0:18:11.960 Italy and people could pinch my bum and I wouldn't 0:18:11.961 --> 0:18:18.681 even notice. So having the pressure there because I sat 0:18:18.761 --> 0:18:21.481 so still, I ended up with a pressure, so it 0:18:21.481 --> 0:18:24.121 would have been on your sacred It was not cool. Yeah, 0:18:24.360 --> 0:18:27.921 everybody was mad, and yeah I felt like they were 0:18:27.961 --> 0:18:30.881 mad with me, but I think the nursing stuff women 0:18:31.241 --> 0:18:32.241 more mad with themselves. 0:18:32.321 --> 0:18:37.920 Yeah. Yeah, they're very They're very hard to heal once 0:18:38.080 --> 0:18:41.161 you developed one, and then they go through the stages 0:18:41.160 --> 0:18:41.761 pretty quickly. 0:18:42.041 --> 0:18:43.801 Yeah, So that was that was That was a low. 0:18:43.880 --> 0:18:46.080 There was Look, to be honest with you, there's been 0:18:46.360 --> 0:18:48.961 four years of low points, and just when you think 0:18:48.961 --> 0:18:52.120 it can get no lower it, somehow something happens just 0:18:52.160 --> 0:18:53.880 to happen, which sucks. 0:18:54.281 --> 0:18:56.440 So what are the high. What do you think you've 0:18:56.961 --> 0:18:58.361 got out of the last few year. 0:18:58.360 --> 0:19:00.681 You know, the funny thing is I was saying to Look, 0:19:00.721 --> 0:19:02.801 I think it was the long suffering Suzanne who I 0:19:02.840 --> 0:19:05.360 work with, or people who talk to me all the time. 0:19:05.840 --> 0:19:08.481 I kept waiting for this bolt of wisdom. 0:19:08.840 --> 0:19:09.041 You know. 0:19:09.120 --> 0:19:11.041 People say I got really sick and I realized the 0:19:11.080 --> 0:19:13.760 importance of family, or I realized that, you know, I 0:19:13.761 --> 0:19:16.920 needed to throw in my corporate job and go and 0:19:17.241 --> 0:19:21.480 you know, grow apples or something. Yeah. Look, I was 0:19:21.561 --> 0:19:24.920 either not listening when my bolt of lightning came, or 0:19:25.001 --> 0:19:28.840 I already had life pretty much figured out before I 0:19:28.880 --> 0:19:33.321 got sick. Like I've always appreciated my friends and family. 0:19:33.481 --> 0:19:36.640 I've always worked really hard at having a work life balance. 0:19:36.840 --> 0:19:39.241 So one of the things that I'm really pleased about 0:19:39.400 --> 0:19:42.281 is that I was Look, I did the right thing. 0:19:42.321 --> 0:19:44.600 I'll put extra money into my superannuation stuff. But I 0:19:44.681 --> 0:19:48.440 traveled significantly before I got sick, so none of that 0:19:48.481 --> 0:19:51.360 whole I'll wait until I retire and I'll take myself 0:19:51.400 --> 0:19:53.400 off to England, or I'll wait till I retire and 0:19:53.441 --> 0:19:57.001 I'll go to Italy and stuff like that. So when 0:19:57.041 --> 0:19:59.441 I was lying in my hospital where The only real 0:19:59.481 --> 0:20:01.440 regret how I had was that I never got to Japan. 0:20:01.921 --> 0:20:04.360 But like I went to Sri Lanka. I've been to 0:20:04.561 --> 0:20:08.441 England in America, and I don't know Thailand and Vietnam 0:20:08.481 --> 0:20:11.681 and all sorts of places and the Pilbra region and everything. 0:20:11.801 --> 0:20:15.120 So you've lived life. Well, yeah, I had to. You 0:20:15.160 --> 0:20:17.881 only get one shot at it, and you've done great well, 0:20:17.921 --> 0:20:20.881 I think so like, but I think the main if 0:20:20.921 --> 0:20:23.401 I had to be less learn the lesson was it's 0:20:23.521 --> 0:20:27.520 to not focus on yourself all the time because you're 0:20:27.561 --> 0:20:31.161 not that interesting, but also to give people. People would 0:20:31.160 --> 0:20:33.120 come in there say, oh this is happening. My husband's 0:20:33.160 --> 0:20:35.640 drive me nuts, or you know why wife's an idiot 0:20:35.761 --> 0:20:39.001