Speaker 1: Everyone.
Speaker 2: It's Kali here for this week's Mojo Monday. So I'm
Speaker 2: going to talk about that a word today, and I
Speaker 2: think most of you are going to know what the
Speaker 2: A word is. So I'm going to talk about the
Speaker 2: word anxiety, and I think a lot of you will
Speaker 2: agree with me, or maybe you haven't thought about this,
Speaker 2: but it is a word that is overused at the moment.
Speaker 2: I think social media has had a huge impact on that.
Speaker 2: We tend to our young people and I'm not isolated
Speaker 2: to young people that many of us are very aware
Speaker 2: of medical kind of terminology and using it in our
Speaker 2: everyday language just because it's just so accessible.
Speaker 1: At the moment.
Speaker 2: I wanted to talk about this because I know a
Speaker 2: lot of students are heading into exams season right now
Speaker 2: the schools and the universities, and there are a lot
Speaker 2: of kids at school, maybe year eight, year nine. I
Speaker 2: know my son, he's included in this, and they are
Speaker 2: doing exams for the very first time, so of course
Speaker 2: that is going to bring up feelings.
Speaker 1: In the lead up to exams.
Speaker 2: So I just wanted to have a bit of a
Speaker 2: chat about that, but of course not isolated to those situations.
Speaker 1: Now, I know Naming how we feel is helpful.
Speaker 2: Of course, research shows us that labeling an emotion can
Speaker 2: turn down the intensity.
Speaker 1: It's a bit like.
Speaker 2: Turning down the sound of a blaring speaker. But what
Speaker 2: if we get the language wrong. What if the naming
Speaker 2: of the emotion is actually making things worse because we're
Speaker 2: getting the label wrong.
Speaker 1: You know, we feel this.
Speaker 2: Wide range of emotions, and when we say we'll name
Speaker 2: that emotion, we have to kind of go into our
Speaker 2: bank of vocabulary and match the label with the emotion.
Speaker 1: And there is a big chance that we're going to
Speaker 1: get that wrong.
Speaker 2: And what o'ur noticing in our language right now is
Speaker 2: we automatically go to this word anxiety to describe what
Speaker 2: used to be called maybe nervousness or worry or concern.
Speaker 2: There are heaps of other words that we can use
Speaker 2: for how we're feeling in that moment. But what we're
Speaker 2: doing is we're slapping this label of anxiety on every flutter,
Speaker 2: every moment that we feel our nervous system kicking, you know,
Speaker 2: our racing heart, our shaking hands, or even our worried thoughts,
Speaker 2: and every dip in confidence that we have. It's like, oh,
Speaker 2: here's my anxiety or oh, I'm anxious.
Speaker 1: And here's what that can do.
Speaker 2: It can inflate something that is very human, that is
Speaker 2: very natural and manageable, into something clinical.
Speaker 1: And what we're.
Speaker 2: Doing is we're pathologizing natural human responses where it's it's
Speaker 2: like it's permanent. It's something that feels permanent, and it
Speaker 2: feels heavy, and it feels much bigger than us. But
Speaker 2: most of the time it isn't and not all the time.
Speaker 2: I am very aware that everyone listening is in a
Speaker 2: different situation, but I'm also aware that the word anxiety
Speaker 2: is being overused and that can have major ongoing repercussions.
Speaker 2: We're using the word anxiety as this umbrella term, and
Speaker 2: I don't think that's helpful. So being nervous, let's use
Speaker 2: the word nervous, which is temporary, and I'm going to
Speaker 2: talk about.
Speaker 1: What it is.
Speaker 2: But if we keep focusing on these sort of these
Speaker 2: feelings of being nervous, it can lead to anxiety. And
Speaker 2: that can depend on how we approach it, our mindset,
Speaker 2: our attitude towards the nervousness.
Speaker 1: If we automatically call.
Speaker 2: Our state of being nervous anxiety and judge it as
Speaker 2: negative and a threat something to get rid of.
Speaker 1: It can actually.
Speaker 2: Start to exacerbate and then it can get worse. So
Speaker 2: this is where we can control our attitude towards it.
Speaker 2: So if you have been listening to previous episodes, I've
Speaker 2: mentioned this before. When I do presentations, which I love
Speaker 2: to do. I love presenting. It's an opportunity for me
Speaker 2: to make a difference in people's lives. But I can't
Speaker 2: really nervous and I'm talking really nervous in the lead
Speaker 2: up to it. But I don't call it anxiety. I
Speaker 2: don't say I'm anxious about doing the presentation.
Speaker 1: I certainly get hyped up, and I have worried thoughts and.
Speaker 2: I you know, all the stuff that goes on in
Speaker 2: your head and your body and the racing heart and
Speaker 2: all that stuff. But I'm so glad that I that
Speaker 2: actually happened thanks to me, which might sound a bit
Speaker 2: weird to you, but I welcome it. And that's because
Speaker 2: that nervous energy helps me. I'm grateful that it turns up,
Speaker 2: because what it is is it's.
Speaker 1: Telling me you care. You want this to go well.
Speaker 2: You want to give people value, So you need to
Speaker 2: put in the work, you need to show up.
Speaker 1: So think about that. On the other side of.
Speaker 2: That very uncomfortable, very unpleasant state of nervousness, there is
Speaker 2: this desire that I do well, and there's no way
Speaker 2: I would do as well without it. If I didn't care,
Speaker 2: I wouldn't feel nervous, so I wouldn't bother putting in
Speaker 2: the work that I do. So what I do is
Speaker 2: I listen to it. I don't run from it, and
Speaker 2: I use it as fuel. I prep better, focus more,
Speaker 2: and I really stay grounded. And it doesn't mean that
Speaker 2: I'm not super uncomfortable. Well, this is happening, but I'm
Speaker 2: just in embracing the whole thing. But it's not anxiety.
Speaker 2: I'm not anxious. I'm nervous. That's my body gearing up
Speaker 2: for something that really matters to me. And the same
Speaker 2: goes for students heading into exams. And I know some schools,
Speaker 2: as I mentioned, they've got exams in a few weeks
Speaker 2: and there are kids heading into exams for the first time.
Speaker 2: Let's stop casually throwing around the word anxiety. Anxiety is
Speaker 2: it can be a mental health condition because it's excessive
Speaker 2: and it can really stop people functioning in their life.
Speaker 2: It can be so debilitating an anxiety. It often can't
Speaker 2: be pinpointed to a trigger or an event. But what
Speaker 2: most of us are feeling is natural. It's a natural,
Speaker 2: healthy nervousness. Let's not medicalize something that's actually helpful. And
Speaker 2: so kids going into exams are going to feel nervous.
Speaker 2: It's natural, and that's because they care. They care about
Speaker 2: doing well, They want to do well. Okay, So changing
Speaker 2: that attitude towards it can actually mean they can use
Speaker 2: it for fuel and really work out what they need
Speaker 2: to do. You know, maybe we can change our language
Speaker 2: and our attitude. And I guess if you can tell
Speaker 2: me what you're so called anxious about, like an exam
Speaker 2: or a presentation, or maybe it's a social event, then
Speaker 2: that's you being nervous. It's about an upcoming event, and
Speaker 2: chances are it'll all dissipate once you start, and certainly
Speaker 2: once it's done. You know, how could you not feel
Speaker 2: nervous before an exam or how you How could I
Speaker 2: not feel nervous before a presentation or even a social
Speaker 2: event where you hardly know anyone. I know, if I'm
Speaker 2: going to a social event and I'm thinking, oh gosh,
Speaker 2: you know, I only know one or two p people. Yes,
Speaker 2: I'm nervous about that because there's something on the other
Speaker 2: side of that that I care.
Speaker 1: I care about connection. I do care about what other
Speaker 1: people think of me, whether they're going to like me.
Speaker 2: This is all natural. So here's my invitation to you
Speaker 2: for this week. Instead of jumping automatically to a label,
Speaker 2: just feel what you feel. Take some time to connect
Speaker 2: with that feeling. The challenge with this is trying not
Speaker 2: to judge it in any way, allow yourself to just be,
Speaker 2: and then you can ask what is on the other
Speaker 2: side of this feeling?
Speaker 1: What is my desire?
Speaker 2: Is a desire to add value, a desire to do well,
Speaker 2: a desire for connection, And what is this feeling trying
Speaker 2: to tell me?
Speaker 1: You know, in my case, it's telling me prepare practice.
Speaker 2: Maybe it's telling the students to put the work in
Speaker 2: and study.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: It might be telling you to take some time out
Speaker 2: and do something that's enjoyable for you, or maybe it's
Speaker 2: telling you to have an early night. There's just so
Speaker 2: many messages that these feelings can tell us. And then
Speaker 2: it's what do I need to do right now? Because
Speaker 2: the truth is the only reason we get nervous before
Speaker 2: something big is that we care. We give a damn
Speaker 2: and that's not a weakness, that's commitment, that's heart. So
Speaker 2: let's stop using the word anxiety as an umbrella term
Speaker 2: and let's start getting curious. Feel how you feel, stay human,
Speaker 2: and focus on what you care about, and then show.
Speaker 1: Up for that.
Speaker 2: So thank you so much for listening. I'm just so
Speaker 2: full of gratitude for everybody that chunes in every Monday
Speaker 2: or whatever day you choose to tune into the Mojo
Speaker 2: Monday episodes. I just really really appreciate it. Have a
Speaker 2: great week, and I'll catch you next week.
Speaker 1: So yeah,