Speaker 1: I get a you bloody Champions, Welcome another installment The
Speaker 1: Year Project. Tiffany and Cook, Peter Brian, Kevin, Mannix Shepherd.
Speaker 1: I'm not sure why Mannix man. We'll start with Cook,
Speaker 1: who's in the top left square.
Speaker 2: Hi, Cook, I don't know where you find all the
Speaker 2: random names that just fall out of your mouth when
Speaker 2: you do it.
Speaker 1: You know, can I tell you the etymology, No, not
Speaker 1: the etymology, the origin story of all of those names
Speaker 1: that I tend to spout. So when I was growing
Speaker 1: up way back, you know, just after Jesus passed away,
Speaker 1: so my dad, my dad, he used to tell me
Speaker 1: real deal. His name was Ronald Edward Patrick Nan Patrick Personval,
Speaker 1: Clarence Terrence James Ambrose Alowish's Harper. And I thought till
Speaker 1: I was about sixteen, that was his real name, Ronald
Speaker 1: Edward Personal, Clarence Terrence, James Ambrose Alowish's Harper. And I
Speaker 1: never even asked, but he would say that on repeat,
Speaker 1: and so that's what I thought he real name was.
Speaker 1: That's the best story ever. So I grew up, yeah,
Speaker 1: with that kind of bullshit. And you explain, basically, well,
Speaker 1: you become your parents fuck, which that is not a
Speaker 1: good thing. But anyway, God bless him. What is your
Speaker 1: actual middle name? Jonathan?
Speaker 3: But I just have to say, it's no wonder where
Speaker 3: you get your piss taking from, given that was what
Speaker 3: your old man used to do to you.
Speaker 1: Ah. My man used to constantly bullshit me about things,
Speaker 1: and I didn't know he was bullshitting me, so I
Speaker 1: would just be like, no, that's really my dad's name,
Speaker 1: and everyone's like, I don't think it is. I'm like, no,
Speaker 1: it really is, and they're like, you're thirty. Stop. Ah,
Speaker 1: we'll start with We'll start with the lady because we've
Speaker 1: got to be respectful from the school I haven't seen yet.
Speaker 1: Do you like that that I called you a lady? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Well we What have you been up to today, lady?
Speaker 2: I've been I went Do you know what I went for?
Speaker 2: I went for a walk with one of your mates.
Speaker 1: I don't have any mates, but go.
Speaker 2: On Nicole Ladell. She's in town. I met her for
Speaker 2: a walk and some brecky. Then I come home, did
Speaker 2: a party. I've been head down, tail up since then.
Speaker 1: What is she doing in Melps?
Speaker 2: She was coming to do some rail crossing analysis.
Speaker 1: Oh that's right, she's she's part of a PhD. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's wow. Can I just ask here? You rubbing moisturizer
Speaker 1: onto your hands?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 1: So I was do you reckon you could do that
Speaker 1: before we start? I mean, you know, I don't want
Speaker 1: you to be totally present, but could you leave your
Speaker 1: fucking beauty regime? I don't know before or after the show.
Speaker 1: I don't ask too much as an employer, but I mean,
Speaker 1: I feel like if you're rubbing shit in your hands,
Speaker 1: you're not at optimal kind of operating system. You don't
Speaker 1: see Pete rubbing anything into himself. No, I'm trying to
Speaker 1: find some moisturizer. I might join it. I feel like
Speaker 1: my hands are feeling a bit drying. Ow tif Maybe
Speaker 1: we should bring you into the show, seeing as you
Speaker 1: are the focal point, but allegedly not yet yet. Hi Pete,
Speaker 1: how are you? I'm great? How are you?
Speaker 3: Craig Anthony? I've forgotten all those middle lams already. I
Speaker 3: was going to try and repeat him back to you,
Speaker 3: but I've forgotten very good.
Speaker 1: Craig Anthony. Is that that's more than enough? How's you?
Speaker 1: And I have not spoken for a long time. I
Speaker 1: do not think we're spoken in twenty twenty four? Am
Speaker 1: I correct? I think we know? You might be right.
Speaker 1: I was going to say, we have, but maybe that
Speaker 1: was last year. I'm realizing that I've lost track of time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was going to say, but I had my son.
Speaker 3: But my son's now eighteen months old, so that was
Speaker 3: probably about twelve eighteen months ago that we caught up.
Speaker 1: Yeah, how is? I was going to ask, how is
Speaker 1: the little dude?
Speaker 3: He's good, mate, Little Ollie's gone. Well, he's eighteen months
Speaker 3: and full of energy.
Speaker 1: I joke.
Speaker 3: He's a bit like a shark in that if he
Speaker 3: stops moving at any point, he might die. So he's
Speaker 3: in a constant state of motion and chaos, which is great.
Speaker 1: Is he in the ninety nine percentile for height? He's pretty,
Speaker 1: he is. He's essentially the ninety or something. I don't know.
Speaker 3: He's long and lean and got arms and legs popping
Speaker 3: out everywhere, just like me.
Speaker 1: So he's so good. For anyone who's wondering what that's about.
Speaker 1: Pete is two meter, Peter, ergo the question, two Peter,
Speaker 1: what is being a parent taught you? Oh gosh, how
Speaker 1: long have you got? I think the short answer is no,
Speaker 1: pun intended.
Speaker 3: It's a yeah, the long answer, it's a constant mirror
Speaker 3: to your own.
Speaker 1: Lack of pati. It's presence and concentration.
Speaker 3: That's how I currently feel because Ollie can stick to
Speaker 3: an activity on repeat, I don't know, for twenty minutes
Speaker 3: at a time, for example, and after about the third minute,
Speaker 3: you can feel you. I can feel myself. I'll speak
Speaker 3: for myself, going, my god, I can't read this book
Speaker 3: one more time, and we're really going to read it again.
Speaker 3: And that constant need to change the activity I recognize
Speaker 3: comes from me, not necessarily from him. And it's like,
Speaker 3: I find this happens multiple times throughout the day where
Speaker 3: I'll want to do something different, not because Ollie wants to,
Speaker 3: but because I want to. And it's like constantly checking
Speaker 3: yourself on where's that coming from? Why do you want
Speaker 3: to change activities? Why are you bored?
Speaker 1: Why you aren't interested in this book anymore? Yeah? Why
Speaker 1: can't you stay focused? Dad? This is important? You're not
Speaker 1: getting all the lessons in this exactly.
Speaker 3: There was a we had a pediatrician just after he
Speaker 3: was born. You get a sign a pediatrician and we
Speaker 3: saw him and he said something off the cuff, which
Speaker 3: I think about almost every day. It was one of
Speaker 3: those like off the cuff comments from a doctor that
Speaker 3: I think has so much wisdom, which was is it
Speaker 3: bothering him? Or is it bothering you? And I just
Speaker 3: think about that all the time, because, especially in the
Speaker 3: early days of being a first time parent, you're like, oh,
Speaker 3: he coughed three times? Is that okay? Like is he
Speaker 3: going to die? And they're like, look, it's okay, he's
Speaker 3: not bothered. You're the one that's bothered by the coughing.
Speaker 3: And I just think there's so much wisdom in that
Speaker 3: of like I'm constantly thinking something's bothering him, when in
Speaker 3: reality it's actually just bothering me. It's actually just that
Speaker 3: I want to go for a walk and get some
Speaker 3: fresh air. Not that only wants to get some fresh air.
Speaker 3: He's perfectly happy.
Speaker 1: Do you, because you're such a student of the mind
Speaker 1: then human behavior, and you know all of the bits
Speaker 1: and pieces that make up the human experience, do you
Speaker 1: feel like turning him into a little experiment where you think,
Speaker 1: how many languages can I get this little motherfucker to
Speaker 1: speak by the time he's five?
Speaker 3: Totally, I'm like, if I read him twenty five books
Speaker 3: a day.
Speaker 1: Is he going to be absolute genius by the end
Speaker 1: of this? Like you know, when you know, like everyone
Speaker 1: talks about how incredibly malleable and kind of teachable a
Speaker 1: young brain is. Do you factor that in? I try to.
Speaker 3: I mean, the flip side is the fear based recognition
Speaker 3: of when you do something that you know you probably
Speaker 3: shouldn't in front of it and you go, oh, he's malleable.
Speaker 3: He's probably going to pick up on that. The fact
Speaker 3: that I just swore at the top of my lungs
Speaker 3: because I dropped the pan. I wonder if he's going
Speaker 3: to pick that up and start swearing very shortly.
Speaker 1: So yes, on the.
Speaker 3: Positive, But also, you know, I feel like I don't
Speaker 3: know if this is a gesture of me, but I
Speaker 3: feel like it's really easy to beat oneself up as
Speaker 3: a pins to look at your behavior in a negative light,
Speaker 3: which I guess I've already reflected on already in this
Speaker 3: short conversation. So it's it's a yeah, it's it's like
Speaker 3: a tiny little mirror that follows you around just reflects
Speaker 3: back all of your little isms.
Speaker 1: This is a very cragish question, but do you ever
Speaker 1: wonder what it's like for him to be around you.
Speaker 1: Do you ever think, like, what's the me experience for him?
Speaker 1: Like this little tiny dude looking up at this like
Speaker 1: skyscraper of a human. I wonder what it is like
Speaker 1: for him? Totally.
Speaker 3: I wonder if he's looking at me thinking why are
Speaker 3: you still here? I wonder if what is your purpose?
Speaker 1: And where is Mum? Was there?
Speaker 3: Like some days I joke to my wife Tracy that
Speaker 3: she gets home from work and oh, he'll run straight
Speaker 3: up to her and he's like, thank.
Speaker 1: God, I'm so sick of that.
Speaker 3: Like, I'm so sick of hanging out with this giant
Speaker 3: skyscraper who's offering me absolutely no value except providing me
Speaker 3: a little bit of food every now.
Speaker 1: Yeah, So I do.
Speaker 3: I constantly think about what I mean, what is going
Speaker 3: through the mind of a tiny toddler who is able to.
Speaker 1: Absorb and grow.
Speaker 3: Like if I think about how much I've changed and
Speaker 3: grown in the last eighteen months, I'd like to say
Speaker 3: it's heaps, because I'm a growth minded, you know, individual
Speaker 3: who practices what I preach. But the reality compared to
Speaker 3: an eighteen month old toddler, the amount they grow and
Speaker 3: absorb and learn is mind blowing, mind blowing. So I
Speaker 3: do I think about it. I nerd out it on
Speaker 3: a lot, probably to a fault.
Speaker 1: Has it been an exercise in ah, because you have
Speaker 1: your own business and you're busy, But has it been
Speaker 1: an exercise in time management, resource management, energy management? High
Speaker 1: level problem solving? Because all the flexibility and freedom that
Speaker 1: you have, well, that's.
Speaker 3: Gone right right right, yeah, and yeah, so yes to
Speaker 3: all of that. It's an absolute head fuck, if I
Speaker 3: can say that in the sense that you I've deliberately
Speaker 3: set constraints on my time because I want to prioritize
Speaker 3: my family and my wife works full time as well. Now,
Speaker 3: so I don't work Mondays, for example, and I try
Speaker 3: and stop work at three pm to pick up Ali
Speaker 3: from daycare on the on the couple of days that
Speaker 3: he is there.
Speaker 1: And the.
Speaker 3: Thing that that does is creates new stories in my
Speaker 3: head around are you being lazy? Are you not working
Speaker 3: hard enough because I run my own business. Are you
Speaker 3: losing momentum? Are you going to lose clients? Oh, you're
Speaker 3: not working on Monday? What if the phone rings on Monday?
Speaker 1: You know?
Speaker 3: So there's these new internal self flatulating stories that I
Speaker 3: can hear and feel that I'm now navigating, whereas in
Speaker 3: the past I think the story was probably you're working
Speaker 3: too much, You're doing too much. Are you staying present
Speaker 3: to your wife and your friends and your family.
Speaker 1: It feels a little more like the.
Speaker 3: Opposite now, where I'm not enoughing my own work, which is,
Speaker 3: you know, not super helpful.
Speaker 1: When you first become a parent, I don't know, and
Speaker 1: neither does Tiff, because well, TIF know, it's more than me.
Speaker 1: She's got animals. She is an animal, so she's a
Speaker 1: dog mum and a cat mum, but you're an actual, proper,
Speaker 1: grown up adult parent. When you first became a dad,
Speaker 1: did you feel like a fraud? How long did it
Speaker 1: take before you go before you really felt like somewhat
Speaker 1: you knew what.
Speaker 3: You were doing as a parent. I don't think I'm
Speaker 3: there yet. I think I'm still trying to figure it
Speaker 3: out if it's such a strange experience and adjustment, because
Speaker 3: I don't even know how to articulate this, but I
Speaker 3: still am Tracy and I joke about this. I feel
Speaker 3: like we still have days where you think, when are
Speaker 3: the adults coming to take care of.
Speaker 1: All of us?
Speaker 3: Or who tasked us with this responsibility because this is
Speaker 3: now forever, and I keep thinking that it's just this
Speaker 3: little experiment we're doing for.
Speaker 1: A year or two.
Speaker 3: But it's constantly reminding myself that.
Speaker 1: This is a forever decision, which is great.
Speaker 3: And I constantly feel like I don't know what I'm
Speaker 3: doing because things are changing so rapidly. It's like the
Speaker 3: ultimate exercise in humility. Guess what You've got absolutely no
Speaker 3: idea what you're doing, but this person's life depends on
Speaker 3: you figuring it out.
Speaker 1: So good luck. What perspective did it give you? Did
Speaker 1: parenthood give you? And looking at the little dude give
Speaker 1: you that you couldn't have got otherwise?
Speaker 3: Oh good question. You're on fire today. I think that
Speaker 3: I think my first reaction to that is the the
Speaker 3: realization that how I feel about him is how my
Speaker 3: parents feel about me. Right, And so I'm sure that
Speaker 3: a lot of listeners can relate to the feeling of
Speaker 3: when your parents frustrate you or annoy you, or are
Speaker 3: watching you do something when they're there and you're like,
Speaker 3: why are you watching me? And stop bothering me? And
Speaker 3: why are you asking me so many questions? And yet
Speaker 3: I could sit on the couch and watch Ollie play
Speaker 3: with a toy car.
Speaker 1: Right, just about what I said earlier.
Speaker 3: All day like I just want to absorb and watch
Speaker 3: and ask him questions so much the love and the.
Speaker 1: Care that I have for him. I don't know.
Speaker 3: I just feel like it's so easy to take that
Speaker 3: for granted when you think about your parents. But like
Speaker 3: the recognition that how I feel about him is how
Speaker 3: my mum and dad must feel about me and my
Speaker 3: brother and sister days has been mind blowing. And I
Speaker 3: think I heard that intellectually, but I don't know if
Speaker 3: I understood it emotionally until I experienced it myself.
Speaker 1: Does that make sense? Now? Feel free to not answer
Speaker 1: the following question, but I'm just curious if you could,
Speaker 1: and then we'll move on from parenting, which is not Well.
Speaker 1: I didn't actually have a plan. I never have a plan.
Speaker 1: My only plan going in was that I would probably
Speaker 1: talk to you. That was That's the extent of my plan.
Speaker 1: So my question is how does it work practically? So
Speaker 1: you said the little guys in daycare twice a week.
Speaker 1: You work full time and your wife works full time,
Speaker 1: So how did the other five days a week work? Yeah, so.
Speaker 3: This is one of the great juggles that I feel
Speaker 3: like I appreciate everyone around me with kids has been
Speaker 3: doing for a lot longer than I have. So how
Speaker 3: we structure it, because Tracy's only been back for six months,
Speaker 3: is I take Monday off with him, yep, and do
Speaker 3: a little bit of work when he has a nap,
Speaker 3: but mainly take the day off. He has daycare Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday,
Speaker 3: so three days not too and then Friday we have
Speaker 3: a sort of Tracy works from home, there's a babysitter
Speaker 3: that comes, and then I finished a bit early.
Speaker 1: There's like a juggle that happens.
Speaker 3: She takes the morning, babysitter takes the middle, and I
Speaker 3: take the end, and then weekends we have as a
Speaker 3: team as a family.
Speaker 1: And that's at the moment what's sort of working for us.
Speaker 3: And I say sort of because one of the reflections
Speaker 3: we've had in the last couple of weeks is she said,
Speaker 3: don't know if we need to go this hard in
Speaker 3: the next six months or the next felve months, because
Speaker 3: having both of us work so much and travel so much.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 3: I'm sure you've experienced this too, that the days of
Speaker 3: us saying during COVID we'll never travel again, we'll do
Speaker 3: everything virtually seems to have gone out of the window.
Speaker 3: And I seem be on a plane every week, which
Speaker 3: is awesome and I love it, and being in person
Speaker 3: with a bunch of humans is great. And the reality
Speaker 3: is like we've had weeks, and we have multiple weeks
Speaker 3: where Trace will be on the plane and get home
Speaker 3: on one a Wednesday, and then I'll high fiber and
Speaker 3: get on a plane and go way till Friday. And
Speaker 3: there's just so much juggling in between. So that's how we're.
Speaker 1: Doing it at the moment, and I don't know how
Speaker 1: sustainable it is, though it's hard just remind my audience
Speaker 1: or inform my audience who've never met you before, like
Speaker 1: what you do? What's your job? I spend.
Speaker 3: My days thinking about working within and helping people in organizations,
Speaker 3: mainly in the frame of leadership development and executive coaching.
Speaker 3: I would say I could put a bunch of labels
Speaker 3: on it and fancy stuff on it, but essentially it's
Speaker 3: all about helping leaders be better leaders, helping executives be
Speaker 3: better executives, and what sits behind that? As you know
Speaker 3: and your listeners will underly know is helping humans be
Speaker 3: hopefully slightly better humans.
Speaker 1: So yeah, I.
Speaker 3: Run workshops, I coach one on one and work with
Speaker 3: a bunch of clients and corporates around Australia.
Speaker 1: As we're recording this, it's eight days away from Christmas
Speaker 1: and whatever day's bloody fifteen or sixteen days away from
Speaker 1: January one, and it's traditionally a time of the year
Speaker 1: where everybody reflects, and not everybody, but a lot of
Speaker 1: people reflect about what they did and what they didn't
Speaker 1: do this year and what they're going to do or
Speaker 1: want to do next year. And you know, we've had
Speaker 1: repeated conversations about New Year's resolutions and so on. What's
Speaker 1: your kind of thinking and messaging around this time of
Speaker 1: year because everybody does do a little bit of a
Speaker 1: stock take, I think, or most people do a bit
Speaker 1: of a stock take. And I'm doing a workshop tonight,
Speaker 1: which by the time everyone hears this it will be
Speaker 1: done and dusted. But it's called pre season twenty twenty five, right,
Speaker 1: So we're having a bit of a chat about what's
Speaker 1: your kind of thinking around Broadly speaking, you know these
Speaker 1: times of the year where we reflect than when we
Speaker 1: sometimes press the reset button or the refresh button and
Speaker 1: actually making that work or making that a productive and
Speaker 1: an effective thing rather than a thing that we just
Speaker 1: do on auto pilot, which kind of rarely amounts to much. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I think that last part is so crucial because I
Speaker 3: think it's awesome to reflect, and I do it myself.
Speaker 3: I encourage anyone listening to do it. To reflect on
Speaker 3: what went well, what went less well. To reflect on
Speaker 3: what gave you energy or what gave you less energy.
Speaker 3: To reflect on what let you up in twenty twenty
Speaker 3: four versus what didn't. And you know, there are tactical
Speaker 3: ways you can do that, Like I like to look
Speaker 3: through my phone at my photos because my assertion is
Speaker 3: the things you took photos of were generally things that
Speaker 3: were interesting to you during the year. You can look
Speaker 3: through your calendar, you can do whatever it is you
Speaker 3: need to do to reflect. But your pointint, which I
Speaker 3: think is a sound one, is and then what YEA,
Speaker 3: what do you do post reflection? So I, as a
Speaker 3: professional development personal development NERD, as a longtime friend, fan
Speaker 3: follower of you and many others, I love this stuff
Speaker 3: and I love thinking about it and earning out on it.
Speaker 3: But I know that a lot of people don't necessarily
Speaker 3: or don't have the desire, the interest, the capability, the
Speaker 3: skill of committing to change and making it happen. Not
Speaker 3: to say that I always am able to. So I
Speaker 3: like to oversimplify things, and the current oversimplified version of
Speaker 3: this that I look at is what do I want
Speaker 3: to do more of and what do I want to
Speaker 3: do less of next year based on what I've reflected on.
Speaker 3: So I haven't done this for myself this year, but
Speaker 3: I could probably almost do it on the fly, which
Speaker 3: is if I reflect on twenty twenty four and go,
Speaker 3: what are the things I want to I really enjoy it?
Speaker 3: And gaming energy, it would be traveling and experiences with
Speaker 3: Ollie and Tracy, my wife. So what do I want
Speaker 3: to do more or of? I want to do more
Speaker 3: of that, and so what does that look like? Well,
Speaker 3: it probably looks like pulling out the calendar and going
Speaker 3: at least once a quarter we're going on a weekend
Speaker 3: trip somewhere there.
Speaker 1: It is in action.
Speaker 3: So in my mind it's the reflection is great, capture
Speaker 3: what works, capture what's not. But then to your point,
Speaker 3: the action of what are you going to do about that,
Speaker 3: I think is the critical question, and I think that
Speaker 3: I think that making it as small and attainable as
Speaker 3: possible is key.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, what about the balance between, Like, when we
Speaker 1: think about goal setting or change most of the time
Speaker 1: I'm generalizing in this not always the case, but we
Speaker 1: tend to set goals around external things, what we have,
Speaker 1: what we earn, what we get, what we accumulate KPIs numbers,
Speaker 1: stuff like data results, yeah, versus the internal stuff who
Speaker 1: I am and how I am and like emotions and
Speaker 1: mindset and ticking those kind of for one of a
Speaker 1: better term psychological, emotional, perhaps spiritual boxes. It's like, maybe
Speaker 1: it's not about out there, Maybe it's about maybe the
Speaker 1: next year is about in here. Maybe my situation, circumstance,
Speaker 1: environment isn't the issue, And maybe it's maybe I need
Speaker 1: to look inward not outward, because so much of goal
Speaker 1: setting is an inside out not an outside in process. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think I agree with you that we tend
Speaker 3: to focus on external and outcome driven goals and objectives.
Speaker 3: Part of me wants to defend that in the sense
Speaker 3: that I think the reason we do that is because
Speaker 3: they're measurable. Yeah, And I think what can be hard
Speaker 3: to measure is how how do I measure my inner work,
Speaker 3: my internal monologue, my more present state. It can be
Speaker 3: really difficult to measure, notwithstanding the fact that it's actually
Speaker 3: hard to do. But I don't think that means we
Speaker 3: shouldn't try. So what I would what I would ask
Speaker 3: or put forward or or I guess, query or noodlene
Speaker 3: is can you have outcomes that are possibilities of a
Speaker 3: process that you are committing to follow, and not to
Speaker 3: have the outcomes as the thing that will determine your success,
Speaker 3: but to have them as possibilities that may happen if
Speaker 3: you commit to an internal process. In this case, that
Speaker 3: is your version of a success. So, for example, what
Speaker 3: am I even talking about? If I was to say
Speaker 3: an outcome driven goal would be I am more present
Speaker 3: with OLI, Well, that's really hard to measure and quantify,
Speaker 3: and what does that even mean? Versus if I focus
Speaker 3: on a process of trying to, I don't know, meditate
Speaker 3: every day, and I break that down to be anywhere
Speaker 3: between one to twenty minutes, then whether I get the
Speaker 3: outcome of being more present is a little bit outside
Speaker 3: my control. But I like to think that if I
Speaker 3: show up and commit to that daily thing, I'm more
Speaker 3: likely to get that outcome. So in my mind, it's
Speaker 3: less about the outcome is the thing that's going to
Speaker 3: make me happy. It's more about the outcome is the
Speaker 3: carrot that I hope I might get towards, but I
Speaker 3: know I can't guarantee that I will.
Speaker 1: Does that make any sense? Yeah? Yeah, clearly, you know what? No, no, no,
Speaker 1: it does. It's funny because also without knowing it, what
Speaker 1: you identified in there is what I don't know if
Speaker 1: others do. But I call it the psychology problem. And
Speaker 1: like as a science, as a studiable, observable, measurable science,
Speaker 1: psychology is bullshit. And this is someone doing a PhD
Speaker 1: in it, right, because I could test Tiff today, like
Speaker 1: right now, we could do an assessment because it's all
Speaker 1: self assessment, it's all subjective valuation. And Tiff does a
Speaker 1: fifty item kind of protocol, you know, based on psychology, emotion,
Speaker 1: sociology and whatever, right, how she sees herself or how
Speaker 1: she feels. And then we get all this data from
Speaker 1: Tiff and we go, here's TIFF's data on these criteria.
Speaker 1: But you know, Tip's a bit distracted and tired and
Speaker 1: she's had a blue with her cat, and then she
Speaker 1: you know, then she does the same test tomorrow and
Speaker 1: we get completely different data. But virtually every other science
Speaker 1: that is not the case, right, you know, Physics is physics,
Speaker 1: Biology is biology. You know, engineering is engineering. It's like,
Speaker 1: you know, it's it's it's all kind of going to
Speaker 1: produce pretty consistent results. But but you're right. I think
Speaker 1: it is that marriage between what is the practical, observable,
Speaker 1: measurable thing that I can do in my physical three
Speaker 1: dimensional world which will create this internal shift.
Speaker 3: Yes, or will increase the probability of an internal shift?
Speaker 3: Is how I think about it. Because you know, if
Speaker 3: I think nothing's guaranteed, there are so many things outside
Speaker 3: my external control, then everything is a game of probability.
Speaker 3: And so I'm a mass nerd. So I like to
Speaker 3: think about how do I increase the probability of the
Speaker 3: outcome that I'm hoping for or seeking? And in answering
Speaker 3: that question, I usually you can come up with a
Speaker 3: couple of things that you think might be the keystone,
Speaker 3: things that will increase their probability. At least That's how
Speaker 3: I think about.
Speaker 1: When you're in front of a group, and all of
Speaker 1: us get in front of groups, but you do it
Speaker 1: full full time. That's your job, that's your thing, and
Speaker 1: you rock up one day. I get asked a lot
Speaker 1: about speaking and just people to help people become not
Speaker 1: necessarily corporate speakers or professional speakers, but that right down
Speaker 1: to people who just don't want to be terrified when
Speaker 1: they're making their birthday speech, or it's speaking at their
Speaker 1: daughter's wedding right and everything in between. So you stand
Speaker 1: up there and you're talking to a group for let's
Speaker 1: just say it's a keynote, So you've got forty five
Speaker 1: to sixty you're doing your thing. What are the things
Speaker 1: that you are aware of than the fact that you
Speaker 1: know the room, you know who you're talking to, You've
Speaker 1: done a briefing call or two, You've kind of got
Speaker 1: the lay of the land in terms of demographic and
Speaker 1: sociology and who's you know, what's the theme of the
Speaker 1: day and why you're there. Then you look around five
Speaker 1: minutes in and people are looking at their iPhone or
Speaker 1: they're disconnected, or they're looking out the window. What do
Speaker 1: you do in that? You know, because we can only
Speaker 1: prep and know so much. But in that moment, What
Speaker 1: are the skills that you have or what's the awareness
Speaker 1: that you have where you can kind of get back
Speaker 1: to some kind of connection or apport or like, what
Speaker 1: do you can you teach us something like because I
Speaker 1: feel like for a lot of us, we we might
Speaker 1: lose the room or lose ourselves and we're like, fuck,
Speaker 1: I don't know where to go from here.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't really talking about that's never having before
Speaker 3: intend it had, no, it has it has. I mean
Speaker 3: I've got a story from this either I could share it.
Speaker 3: I think firstly, i'd say you and I perhaps have
Speaker 3: this in common, which is a comfort in throwing out
Speaker 3: the maybe the plan that we might have had based
Speaker 3: on where the audience is at. I think so much
Speaker 3: of keynotes, workshops coaching comes down to the same skill,
Speaker 3: which is can you meet the group where they're at?
Speaker 3: And if they're at a place of complete distraction and
Speaker 3: boredom or distraction with emails, then continuing the way that
Speaker 3: you have been for that first five minutes is probably
Speaker 3: not going to change that state. So in my mind,
Speaker 3: it's about can you meet them where they're at and
Speaker 3: if needed, change the state, change the energy, change the
Speaker 3: focus of the room to create a pattern, interrupt to
Speaker 3: get people away from the thing that they're currently doing
Speaker 3: if they are distracted. The way I think about that
Speaker 3: is connection over content. So I think that for me personally,
Speaker 3: go one of the days where I'll talk to an
Speaker 3: audience for forty five minutes without some sort of interaction.
Speaker 3: And in fact, if I was doing forty five minutes,
Speaker 3: for example, I would probably break it up into three
Speaker 3: fifteen minute little sections or three ten minute sections with
Speaker 3: a five minute interactive piece at the end of each one.
Speaker 3: And so if I had, for example, a group that
Speaker 3: I was five minutes into my first ten minute thing,
Speaker 3: and I was like, I've got an interactive element or
Speaker 3: a question i want them to explore with the three
Speaker 3: people around them in ten minutes time or in five
Speaker 3: minutes time, because we're five minutes into this, I'd probably
Speaker 3: just bring it forward and go and maybe even call
Speaker 3: it out and go, look, it's been a long day.
Speaker 1: If it's been a long day, I recognize.
Speaker 3: There's a bunch of stuff going on for you all,
Speaker 3: and maybe a few of you are a bit distracted,
Speaker 3: a bit sick of hearing my voice. So why don't
Speaker 3: you turn to the person next to you and answer
Speaker 3: a question, which is, what's one thing you're hoping to
Speaker 3: get out of today, or what's one current challenge you
Speaker 3: have right now as it relates to this topic, or
Speaker 3: what's a story about something that you had for breakfast
Speaker 3: this morning, purely just to break the pattern of everyone's
Speaker 3: distracted and no one's making any attention whatsoever. My assertion
Speaker 3: is in most of my workshops based on how I
Speaker 3: think about them and structure them. And this is not
Speaker 3: for everyone. And that is the thing that most people remember,
Speaker 3: isn't the thing that came out of my mouth, It's
Speaker 3: the thing came out of the mouth of the people
Speaker 3: that they talked with. So I see my role as
Speaker 3: almost a facilitator of those small conversations and almost to
Speaker 3: get out of the way to ask a question, to
Speaker 3: create space and connection with others, but to kind of
Speaker 3: not even need to be the one talking, if that
Speaker 3: makes sense. So yes, that would be That would be
Speaker 3: my response to your very good question. I have a
Speaker 3: warm story if you like, if it one earlier today, earlier,
Speaker 3: yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, go No, this literally happened. I
Speaker 3: was running a workshop ironically on being more effective in
Speaker 3: communicating and storytelling, and about about five or ten minutes
Speaker 3: in I asked a question of the group one hundred
Speaker 3: and twenty people in the room, and I asked a
Speaker 3: question and not one person said a single word for
Speaker 3: what felt like eight minutes was probably only ten seconds.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I was told prior you talked.
Speaker 3: About briefing call that this was a super engaged group,
Speaker 3: very extroverted. You won't be able to shut them up,
Speaker 3: so be careful when you ask questions because they're so
Speaker 3: keen and eager. No one said a single thing I had.
Speaker 3: I had this, not even the person organizing the event,
Speaker 3: by the way, which gets I love that what are
Speaker 3: you doing? So I had this kind of out of
Speaker 3: body experience. Rather I think you might be I think
Speaker 3: you're bombing, Like I think this is going terribly So
Speaker 3: why don't you try something else? Because that didn't work?
Speaker 3: And so I said something like, let's scrap that idea.
Speaker 3: Clearly that's not going to work, So why don't you
Speaker 3: turn to the person next to you and answer the
Speaker 3: same question and introduce yourself if you don't know them,
Speaker 3: And all of a sudden, it was like the room
Speaker 3: caught fire. I couldn't shut them up. That were interacting,
Speaker 3: they were shaking hands, and it sort of became evident
Speaker 3: in this process that I realized that these people don't
Speaker 3: know each other. And so when we finished and the
Speaker 3: rest of the session went really well. When I finished,
Speaker 3: I walked off stage and someone came up to me
Speaker 3: and said, I'm so glad you did that turn to
Speaker 3: the person next to you activity, because we've been sitting
Speaker 3: here for four hours and not once have we had
Speaker 3: the opportunity to talk to or interact with the other
Speaker 3: people on our table, and they're total strangers. So I
Speaker 3: didn't feel comfortable speaking up in front of one hundred
Speaker 3: and twenty strangers. But I do feel comfortable introducing myself
Speaker 3: to the person next to me. So that very experience
Speaker 3: was what happened to mean. I think changing the approach
Speaker 3: of talking to a person next to you, connecting with
Speaker 3: another human, in my mind, is the simplest way to
Speaker 3: break that cycle.
Speaker 1: That's great, I love it. Can tell Can I tell
Speaker 1: you one? Please hear me with a war story? I
Speaker 1: love these all right, so I need to be very
Speaker 1: careful about I'll tell you off air, but I can't
Speaker 1: tell you the name of the organization. But okay, So
Speaker 1: I had to do a talk about a year ago
Speaker 1: for one hundred about one hundred people who were a
Speaker 1: mix of psychologists and counselors. Right, so everyone in the
Speaker 1: room was basically like a mental health professional, all qualified,
Speaker 1: all smart. I had to do a whole day, a
Speaker 1: whole day, So I had to talk from nine till
Speaker 1: five with breaks maybe eight thirty, No, nine till five. Anyway,
Speaker 1: So my plan was, and there's some other variables around
Speaker 1: this that I can't really share that it was just
Speaker 1: it was a tough group anyway, but that's okay. I
Speaker 1: was grateful for the gig I went in. My plan was,
Speaker 1: I'm going to do like my first bit will be
Speaker 1: just really a key, while little kind of fresh start
Speaker 1: of the day. Energy is good, a bit of interaction,
Speaker 1: a bit funny, a bit you know whatever. And it went.
Speaker 1: It went well. It was about anate, right, It wasn't
Speaker 1: a ten. It's about an eight. Good interaction, pretty good energy,
Speaker 1: not amazing. But I'm doing a whole day essentially around
Speaker 1: self management, self regulation, individual kind of optimization, how to
Speaker 1: get the most out of them, you know, like and
Speaker 1: I'm speaking as the excise scientist, but also the psychology researcher.
Speaker 1: Obviously I'm not trying to teach them about psychology, but
Speaker 1: really I'm just like, how do you manage you? You?
Speaker 1: How can you show up at work and be the
Speaker 1: best version of you physically, mentally, emotionally, socially, practically whatever
Speaker 1: that is for you. Blah blah blah blah blah. Like
Speaker 1: simple enough, cool, which have done a lot anyway, So
Speaker 1: I do my opening keynote and then the boss comes
Speaker 1: up to me, and the boss says, that was good.
Speaker 1: And you know when people go that was good and
Speaker 1: you're like this is not good, it's like, no, that
Speaker 1: was really good. Butt. I'm like, fuck, what's the butt?
Speaker 1: So I've still got the best part of you know,
Speaker 1: allowing for lunch and morning play, lunch and all that stuff,
Speaker 1: I've still got at least five hours of speaking actually
Speaker 1: speaking to go and he or she said, yeah, look,
Speaker 1: just don't talk about diet or exercise or fitness or
Speaker 1: you know, anything to do with the body, because some
Speaker 1: people will be triggered.
Speaker 4: Well that was literally about half my day's talking about
Speaker 4: just looking after and I'm not talking about being fit
Speaker 4: or being jacked or you know, eating paleo or I'm
Speaker 4: just talking about how do I manage my body to
Speaker 4: also manage my mind and my energy, because the better
Speaker 4: shape my body's in, I'm more productive and more efficient,
Speaker 4: you know, the better my brain works, because you know,
Speaker 4: there's all these physiological, psychological, and emotional and cognitive benefit
Speaker 4: through weight training, for example. You know all these stories
Speaker 4: about lifting weights and cognitive and you know all this shit.
Speaker 1: So fifty percent of my content I had to handle.
Speaker 1: And then there's like a fifteen minute break and I've
Speaker 1: got to come back now, and I've ejected two and
Speaker 1: a half hours of content. At least, Do not talk
Speaker 1: about food, Do not talk about exercise, Do not talk
Speaker 1: about anything to do with the body, because now, remember
Speaker 1: I'm talking to psychologists. I'm like, surely, and I'm not
Speaker 1: talking about, Hey, how much do you weigh or what
Speaker 1: do you look like? You know, I'm just so fair
Speaker 1: to say that was the toughest gig I did last year. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know so, but just you just got to adapt,
Speaker 1: don't you. Yeah?
Speaker 3: Do you I feel like I've seen you do this live,
Speaker 3: So maybe it's a it's a loaded question in the
Speaker 3: sense I know the answer of it. Do I've seen
Speaker 3: you do really well? Asking the audience for a bit
Speaker 3: of like we could go this way, we could go
Speaker 3: that way, and almost doing a straw pole in the moment,
Speaker 3: so that it's it's adaptable and flexible based on where
Speaker 3: the audience is at.
Speaker 1: Do you still do that? I still do that. I
Speaker 1: don't necessarily plan that, but I mean sometimes I'll go
Speaker 1: in and, like, what you don't want to do as
Speaker 1: a professional speaker everybody is you do not want to
Speaker 1: talk after lunch for a range of reasons. One, they've
Speaker 1: been listening to people that may or may not be
Speaker 1: boring for at least four or five hours, and then
Speaker 1: they've just eaten all the free awesome probably not very
Speaker 1: healthy food lunch, so they're in a fucking food coma,
Speaker 1: so they'reques dropped by thirty percent. Yeah, and they're not
Speaker 1: really that excited about you speaking because they're thinking about
Speaker 1: drinks at five point thirty and then you come in
Speaker 1: there like captain fantastic. So yeah, I it depends on
Speaker 1: Like sometimes I'll go in there and I'll say, tell
Speaker 1: me who's spoken, what's happened already, and when based on
Speaker 1: that information, I will create a different plan in the moment.
Speaker 1: Nice just because like I know they've been sitting, Like
Speaker 1: you said, they've been sitting for four hours. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: I'll go, well, let's not sit for an hour because
Speaker 1: that's probably but that will be context and situation dependent.
Speaker 1: But I think that's I think that's part of it.
Speaker 1: Mate is going, well, this was my intention, but I
Speaker 1: didn't know the dynamics or the lay of the land
Speaker 1: for sure.
Speaker 3: I think the other thing you do really well, which
Speaker 3: is something that I don't do this to the same level.
Speaker 3: But I have a similar philosophy, which is I'm not
Speaker 3: going to use slides because ninety nine percent of the
Speaker 3: other speakers are using slides. So I deliberately don't use
Speaker 3: slides and usually use a flip chart. And I know
Speaker 3: you love to use a whiteboard in a lot of
Speaker 3: your presentations, which I think already creates some sort of
Speaker 3: I think of it as a patent interrupt Yes. And
Speaker 3: so if I'm a speaker thinking about my presentation on
Speaker 3: a day where there's six other speakers, I could pretty
Speaker 3: safely assume that five of those six will have a
Speaker 3: lot of slides. And so if I'm an audience member,
Speaker 3: I've sat through five presentations and slide decks and you
Speaker 3: know they're not all the same, but you know, one
Speaker 3: PowerPoint presentation starts to look like another PowerPoint presentation. So
Speaker 3: even before walking in the room, I'm thinking, like, how
Speaker 3: can you be the pattern interrupt of Oh look this
Speaker 3: guy's not no slides that's interesting, or look at his handwriting.
Speaker 3: His handwriting's quirky, or something else that just triggers a
Speaker 3: slightly different part of their brain to react or to
Speaker 3: hopefully switch on.
Speaker 1: I And the problem with a slide show, well, the
Speaker 1: potential problem is what if your entire hour is dependent
Speaker 1: on like that's all you plan for. I've got twenty
Speaker 1: slides and you're at slide three and everyone's fucking nodding off, right,
Speaker 1: what do You're?
Speaker 4: Right?
Speaker 1: Everybody's clearly not you know, with you, And then you're like, ah,
Speaker 1: well this is not working. I'll go to slide for
Speaker 1: and then it's like, oh, but I don't have another
Speaker 1: plan because my plan is the next sixteen slides, and
Speaker 1: I think that back to your whiteboard point. I had
Speaker 1: one with AGL last week through our friend Lisa, and
Speaker 1: what was interesting was I'm up the front with my
Speaker 1: big fat black whiteboard marker and I'm writing on the board,
Speaker 1: and I go, all right, what are your thoughts on whatever?
Speaker 1: You know? I go, tell me, tell me when I
Speaker 1: say the term success, what comes to mind for you
Speaker 1: doesn't matter. Just go. And people are so I'm writing
Speaker 1: their words on the board. So they're writing up things,
Speaker 1: and I go, all right, now, let's talk about what
Speaker 1: stands between us and success? What do you think of
Speaker 1: the things? Don't overthink it, but what are the things
Speaker 1: that really get in the way, Not the bullshit things
Speaker 1: like time? Fuck time? What are the other things? You know?
Speaker 1: And they're like, oh, fear, procrastination, avoid, And so I'm like, yep, good, good,
Speaker 1: keep it going. Then all of a sudden, we've got
Speaker 1: this dynamic and everybody's energy is good, and they're saying
Speaker 1: stuff that's now becoming part of the tapestry of what's
Speaker 1: going on. And what they said is now literally written
Speaker 1: in front of the room, and they're like, that's my
Speaker 1: that's my word up there, like look at you, look
Speaker 1: at you steering the ship, look at I love that.
Speaker 3: Like co creation as opposed to you know, like a monologue,
Speaker 3: it's how can I how can I co create an
Speaker 3: experience with an audience as opposed to you know, sure,
Speaker 3: or talk at an audience, they're very different things.
Speaker 1: The other thing, I feel.
Speaker 3: Like it just is you remind me of and this
Speaker 3: whole conversation reminds me of is one of my mentors,
Speaker 3: and I'm lucky enough to say he's become a friend
Speaker 3: in Seth Godin, who's written twenty something New York Times bestsellers,
Speaker 3: but one of his books is called Purple Cow.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I think about this.
Speaker 3: Concept so often, which is love this I love this concept,
Speaker 3: by the way, which is it's so I think it's
Speaker 3: really interesting when you apply it to public speaking, in particular,
Speaker 3: because the premise of the book is essentially, you know,
Speaker 3: if you look in most fields, well all fields of cows,
Speaker 3: you've got either I think it's brown cows, black cows,
Speaker 3: white cows, or a mixture of those three, brown and
Speaker 3: black or black and white. And everyone looks the same.
Speaker 3: All the fields look the same. Can you imagine what
Speaker 3: it would be like if you saw a purple cow,
Speaker 3: like a cow in a field that was bright purple.
Speaker 1: You would call your.
Speaker 3: Friends, you would take a photo, you would post it
Speaker 3: to social media, You talk about it NonStop, you tell
Speaker 3: people later on and his premise in the book is
Speaker 3: essentially when you're building products, when you're creating experiences, when
Speaker 3: you're thinking about anything as it relates to a creation
Speaker 3: that we want people to interact with, you should be
Speaker 3: thinking about making it purple. You should be thinking about
Speaker 3: creating some sort of purple cow that is remarkable, which
Speaker 3: is worth remarking at. So, if you're thinking about a
Speaker 3: presentation and you're thinking about your slide deck or not
Speaker 3: slide deck, or whiteboard or not whiteboard, in my mind,
Speaker 3: the question is how do I make this purple? What
Speaker 3: is the thing that people are going to walk away
Speaker 3: and go either take a photo of the thing that
Speaker 3: you did in that moment, or remind them to tell
Speaker 3: their friend later on or their partner of a dinner
Speaker 3: of like, can you believe I saw this thing or
Speaker 3: heard this thing?
Speaker 1: Yeah? I think you know you.
Speaker 3: And I've seen enough sixteen page slide decks or more
Speaker 3: like sixty page slide decks that there's not a heap
Speaker 3: of purple in them. And I think it's a really
Speaker 3: easy way to create a different experience for yourself if
Speaker 3: you can answer that question, what's your purple cap?
Speaker 1: I love it. I remember years ago I just started
Speaker 1: my pt business and I was probably two years in
Speaker 1: and my business skills were one. My management skills were one.
Speaker 1: You know, not fucking everything what. I could train people
Speaker 1: and talk, but everything else like nothing. And I'm trying
Speaker 1: to build a brand and a business and I'm trying
Speaker 1: to understand it. And I was training a guy called
Speaker 1: Jim Watts who was the CEO of some killed a
Speaker 1: football club, and he goes to me, well, I used
Speaker 1: to pick his brain because he was still is like
Speaker 1: extremely smart and yeah, so I'd train him and he'd
Speaker 1: kind of mentor and coach me. And he goes, well,
Speaker 1: what's your USP? And I go what he goes? I go,
Speaker 1: you know, when someone asks you a question that they
Speaker 1: think you should actually called it, I don't understand the question.
Speaker 1: I don't even understand the question. That's how fucking dumb
Speaker 1: I am. Not only can I not give you an
Speaker 1: answer to the question, I don't understand and the question.
Speaker 1: And then he's like, so that means your unique selling proposition.
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh what, I'm like yeah, and he goes, well,
Speaker 1: if you're doing what everyone else is doing and you're
Speaker 1: kind of selling the same thing the same way and
Speaker 1: delivering the same product at about the same price, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, purple cow, you know what's your Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: like it's the same thing, and yeah, you might be.
Speaker 1: It's like people. Somebody actually asked me. A lady actually
Speaker 1: asked me recently her son's doing a personal training course
Speaker 1: and she goes, aren't there isn't the market saturated? I go, yes,
Speaker 1: but it's not saturated with brilliant trainers. It's just saturated. Yeah,
Speaker 1: if you can be, if you can be the one percent,
Speaker 1: if you can be the unicorn. If you can, and
Speaker 1: I could give you a list of twenty things that
Speaker 1: would make you a unicorn trainer. If you can do
Speaker 1: those and be those, you're going to be busy as fuck.
Speaker 1: You know. We had I had a guy on recently,
Speaker 1: Dre on Who is it Andre Andreas anyway, Dre who
Speaker 1: was on the show recently who's spent four and a
Speaker 1: half years in prison, came out of prison for dealing drugs.
Speaker 1: He's very open about his story and four years down
Speaker 1: the track, he's just opened his He did a degree
Speaker 1: while I was in prison, then he did another degree
Speaker 1: in exose science when he got out of prison. And
Speaker 1: I can't say how much he generates a week, but
Speaker 1: it's thousands as a pt. And he's just opened his
Speaker 1: first center, but he spent the last four years just
Speaker 1: out of jail training people in his garage at one
Speaker 1: hundred and twenty bucks for forty five minutes, and he's
Speaker 1: booked out and he's got a waiting list. Now, if
Speaker 1: you can do that in a shitty garage with all equipment,
Speaker 1: when there's gyms down the road with millions of dollars
Speaker 1: worth of equipment, if I was a trainer, I'd want
Speaker 1: to go and see what that guy does. If I
Speaker 1: was a budding trainer, I'm like, how does this guy
Speaker 1: with no equipment and no premises to speak of? What
Speaker 1: does he have? What is he doing that's making all
Speaker 1: of these people with lots of dough drive to his
Speaker 1: fucking garage and hand him hundreds of dollars a week? Fascinating?
Speaker 1: That's the thing, right, if you can brilliant whatever it
Speaker 1: is like, and he's.
Speaker 3: I feel like, in a business context, you could think about, like,
Speaker 3: you know, the flip the flip of that I think
Speaker 3: about is you know someone with an awesome Instagram account
Speaker 3: or a beautiful website and they've spent thousands of dollars
Speaker 3: or millions of not They've spent thousands of dollars with
Speaker 3: thousands of hours crafting this beautifully unique experience on Instagram.
Speaker 3: Looks great, yeah, Versus there's then, you know, there's the
Speaker 3: person who has this thriving coaching business it doesn't even
Speaker 3: know what Instagram is, or it doesn't even have Instagram.
Speaker 3: It's like, yes, they've got the garage equivalent. I'm just
Speaker 3: coaching people out of my garage here, Like, what are
Speaker 3: you talking about? I need an Instagram account?
Speaker 1: That is so true. And even in the domain of
Speaker 1: and this. Of course, I'm not anti academia or anti qualifications,
Speaker 1: but so many people who have got degrees or honors
Speaker 1: or masters or PhDs or whatever, and they're good things,
Speaker 1: but it doesn't necessarily equate to any kind of success
Speaker 1: other than academic. Right.
Speaker 3: I mean, I've got it, gone, I've got it. I
Speaker 3: was just going to say, I've got a bachelor's degree,
Speaker 3: nothing more. And I've worked with CEOs of some of
Speaker 3: the biggest companies in the world from America to Europe
Speaker 3: to Australia, and not once has anyone said to me,
Speaker 3: can you show me your call it? Like qualifications where's
Speaker 3: your master's degree? Have you got a PhD? I've literally never.
Speaker 1: Been asked that question. Yes, yeah, I said that in
Speaker 1: all my years of training people, which was over thirty right,
Speaker 1: one person, and it was just out of curiosity because
Speaker 1: they wanted to know how to become a trainer. One
Speaker 1: person that nobody asked me to see a bit of paper.
Speaker 1: But one person said, oh, what what qualification do you have?
Speaker 1: You know, and I'm like, thank god somebody asked, although
Speaker 1: is at uni? I actually did it. It's like nobody
Speaker 1: you know, if you can. It's like you think about,
Speaker 1: you think about you talk a lot. Firstly, what was
Speaker 1: your degree in?
Speaker 3: I did an arts degree majoring in actually criminology of
Speaker 3: all things and communication.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you talk a lot about human behavior and psychology,
Speaker 1: so do I. None of us have got a degree
Speaker 1: in psychology, none of us.
Speaker 3: Elements of it. But definitely this was like why do
Speaker 3: people solve crimes? Crimes as opposed to be better leaders?
Speaker 1: And you're not putting yourself up as a guru of
Speaker 1: human behavior or psychology or I just think that.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 1: It's like I talk to people about diet, but I'm
Speaker 1: not a dietician. But I'm not prescribing a diet, but
Speaker 1: I don't need to go to university to say, hey, Pete,
Speaker 1: Coco pops are probably not your best choice for brecky, right,
Speaker 1: you know, like you probably don't need a psychology degree
Speaker 1: to understand that calling yourself a fuck with thirty times
Speaker 1: a day is not great. It's probably not a good yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, And so do you have any aspirations one
Speaker 1: way or the other for twenty twenty five As we
Speaker 1: wind up here, mate.
Speaker 3: To be determined if there's anything more than continue to
Speaker 3: do what I've done. I've had this experience in the
Speaker 3: last few years where because I have spent so many
Speaker 3: years and so much time and energy nerding out on
Speaker 3: you know, personal and professional development and listening to podcasts
Speaker 3: and reading books and trying to work out, you know,
Speaker 3: what's the thing that you need to be doing and
Speaker 3: what's I felt I got to the where I was
Speaker 3: looking for some dramatic change that I needed to do
Speaker 3: every year, and at one point a couple of years ago,
Speaker 3: it kind of dawned on me maybe it's less about
Speaker 3: the dramatic change and more about continuing to compound on
Speaker 3: the good things that you're already doing, and so it
Speaker 3: feels like it. It feels like a counterculture un sexy
Speaker 3: thing to say. But I kind of am at the
Speaker 3: point of going, what if I just doubled down or
Speaker 3: continued to focus on the healthy habits that I already had.
Speaker 1: What if I.
Speaker 3: Continue to try and not work mondays and spend that
Speaker 3: with Oli. What would happen in twelve months if I
Speaker 3: did that rather than I've got to completely change the
Speaker 3: way that I live my life. So yeah, that's how
Speaker 3: I'm thinking about it, is what are the great things
Speaker 3: that I know are good for me and they give
Speaker 3: me energy? And can I just not focus on those again?
Speaker 1: Yeah? That makes sense. And sometimes it's just like, well,
Speaker 1: where I'm at as good nothing, It's like this, this
Speaker 1: is actually good. Like when I do a stop take
Speaker 1: on what's going on on planet me, I'm very grateful.
Speaker 3: You know, there's always quirks and things, and you know,
Speaker 3: certain thoughts that you have that you wish you didn't
Speaker 3: have or you can work on. But I tend to
Speaker 3: agree with I catch myself in this constance, can catch
Speaker 3: myself in a constant state of striving, which I feel
Speaker 3: like can actually be unhelpful to the point of, what
Speaker 3: if you just were grateful for where you are and
Speaker 3: what you have right now, rather than looking for the
Speaker 3: opportunity to be better.
Speaker 1: Cookie, if you could do one thing better next year
Speaker 1: other than be you know, the calm in the chaos
Speaker 1: now that you Tiff had a big spiritual epiphany and
Speaker 1: not even being funny, she did have a bit of
Speaker 1: a she's a bit of a renaissance woman's she's seen
Speaker 1: the light nice twenty twenty five. Is there something that
Speaker 1: you want to change in any particular way?
Speaker 2: There's something I am changing, and that's just consistency in
Speaker 2: my in coaching. I like choosing one area of the
Speaker 2: multiple things I do and making that a real pa
Speaker 2: to develop me and develop it and can but consistently.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, Can I ask what lane that is because
Speaker 1: you kind of you've got your fingers in a few pies. Yeah.
Speaker 2: So that's the mind pt, the the coaching people in
Speaker 2: terms and so the workshops and the coaching programs that
Speaker 2: I'm that I'm doing. So I just want to get
Speaker 2: that fills me up the most. I want to get
Speaker 2: really good at that. So and it's just about consistency.
Speaker 2: It's been three years since I ran a one off workshop,
Speaker 2: which I did last week, and it's like three years.
Speaker 2: Why you don't get better waiting three years?
Speaker 1: That's true, dude, that's true. If people want to thank
Speaker 1: you to if if people want to find you, follow
Speaker 1: connect with you and come and see you and Ali,
Speaker 1: how do they do that?
Speaker 3: Human Periscope dot com is the website. I don't think
Speaker 3: all these on there yet, but feel free to reach
Speaker 3: out and ask a question and I'll send you a photo.
Speaker 1: That's your podcast. You stood on your pot The Long
Speaker 1: End six years and counting.
Speaker 3: Jen and I have still yeah, three hundred and something
Speaker 3: odd episodes and we still have The Long on the
Speaker 3: Short of It. Jens five foot one, I'm six foot seven,
Speaker 3: and we spend twenty minutes once a week talking about
Speaker 3: a topic that relates to, you know, being a leader,
Speaker 3: being a creative, being a freelancer, being an entrepreneur.
Speaker 1: I don't want to be precious, but I keep clicking
Speaker 1: refresh on my email and I don't see an invite.
Speaker 3: But stand by, we've we only ever had one guest,
Speaker 3: and it's Seth Godin. We had no guests on our podcast.
Speaker 3: That's a good reason to make an exception. Hey, Mate,
Speaker 3: we'll say goodbye Fair but your ace and father of
Speaker 3: the year.
Speaker 1: You are. That's what I'm going to call this episode,
Speaker 1: Father of the Year. We appreciate you. Thanks mate, Thanks
Speaker 1: for having me, Tip, Thanks for having me, Craig.
Speaker 2: Thanks guys,