WEBVTT - How to avoid burn out 0:00:05.921 --> 0:00:13.321 Appolgie Production. Hi, my name's beck Woodbine and welcome to 0:00:13.361 --> 0:00:14.601 Tenderness for Nurses. 0:00:15.081 --> 0:00:17.160 Do you need to burn out to have those insights? 0:00:17.161 --> 0:00:20.480 While I'm talking about it now? But you know, came 0:00:20.561 --> 0:00:22.201 to educate the world about it, but. 0:00:23.201 --> 0:00:26.401 I didn't want anyone to know that I was so unwell. 0:00:26.961 --> 0:00:29.481 I don't know when it was ever okay to yell 0:00:29.641 --> 0:00:34.681 or scream or abuse somebody. We need to have support 0:00:34.721 --> 0:00:36.801 and know where to look for support and know how 0:00:36.801 --> 0:00:40.760 to look after ourselves, not just professionally, but personally as well. 0:00:41.521 --> 0:00:45.121 It was quite profound and I learned a lot from 0:00:45.120 --> 0:00:45.801 that one action. 0:00:46.961 --> 0:00:47.161 Hi. 0:00:47.200 --> 0:00:51.241 Everyone, Welcome to Tenderness for Nurses. Today, we have the 0:00:51.321 --> 0:00:55.841 lovely guest and friend of mine and Coney, who owns 0:00:56.001 --> 0:01:01.201 and runs equenty leadership and learning business. She's here today 0:01:01.281 --> 0:01:04.321 to chat to us about leadership but also burnout, which 0:01:04.361 --> 0:01:08.241 has had a very personally experienced with and I have to. 0:01:09.081 --> 0:01:12.161 So we're going to chat through what it is, how 0:01:12.200 --> 0:01:15.000 you can help prevent it if you're at that stage, 0:01:15.441 --> 0:01:19.080 what you can do to promote your wellness and health, 0:01:19.481 --> 0:01:21.681 and it's something I think we as nurses all need 0:01:21.721 --> 0:01:25.360 to be very aware of with burnout especially in very 0:01:25.481 --> 0:01:28.921 high stress situations, but also how we can be good 0:01:29.000 --> 0:01:32.840 leaders to each other within the nursing environment. So thanks 0:01:32.840 --> 0:01:33.681 Ange for coming in. 0:01:33.721 --> 0:01:36.041 I really appreciate it. Thanks for inviting me. It's my 0:01:36.121 --> 0:01:37.561 pleasure give us a little. 0:01:37.360 --> 0:01:40.720 Bit of a rundown on you and what you do. 0:01:40.920 --> 0:01:44.840 I am a leadership coach and management consultant, and that 0:01:45.041 --> 0:01:49.921 means I'm working every day with leaders at some level 0:01:49.921 --> 0:01:52.721 from the front line right through to the senior executive, 0:01:53.481 --> 0:01:57.161 who are feeling the pressure to deliver in the business environment, 0:01:57.801 --> 0:02:00.721 and they're trying to deliver results for their organization and 0:02:00.761 --> 0:02:03.161 as well as look after their personal wellbeing and be 0:02:03.281 --> 0:02:04.561 good leaders in the process. 0:02:05.081 --> 0:02:08.641 Since COVID, do you think it's got worse to deliver 0:02:08.721 --> 0:02:09.401 more for less. 0:02:09.481 --> 0:02:12.561 I think the dynamics of work and the experience of 0:02:12.681 --> 0:02:16.641 work has changed. So we're all aware that we now 0:02:16.680 --> 0:02:20.361 have more flexible ways of working and that's challenged some 0:02:20.441 --> 0:02:23.401 of the more traditional leaders, although for nurses, you still 0:02:23.441 --> 0:02:27.841 need to turn up in the hospital and other care environments, 0:02:27.841 --> 0:02:30.921 and so you've had less flexibility and perhaps more pressure 0:02:30.921 --> 0:02:34.441 in your industry than other industries that have felt the 0:02:34.561 --> 0:02:37.921 relief of working from home and the relief of flexible 0:02:37.960 --> 0:02:40.441 hours and the blending of work and life in a 0:02:40.481 --> 0:02:41.521 more integrated way. 0:02:41.721 --> 0:02:43.400 I think people have realized how much money they can 0:02:43.441 --> 0:02:48.201 save not communing and time and energy time and but yeah, 0:02:48.201 --> 0:02:51.201 you're right. In the hospital setting and healthcare, they didn't 0:02:51.201 --> 0:02:53.881 have that opportunity. In fact, I think it got more stressful. 0:02:54.041 --> 0:02:55.320 Yes, I would imagine. 0:02:55.721 --> 0:03:01.441 So you yourself have had and spoken quite openly about burnout. 0:03:01.641 --> 0:03:05.041 And I know during the COVID stage and after COVID 0:03:05.081 --> 0:03:08.041 there was a lot of burnout in nurses just because 0:03:08.041 --> 0:03:10.160 of high stress. I know we didn't have the huge 0:03:10.240 --> 0:03:12.681 numbers that came through the hospital like they did overseas, 0:03:13.321 --> 0:03:16.121 and I know from colleagues overseas it was horrendous. 0:03:16.520 --> 0:03:17.361 What was the. 0:03:17.361 --> 0:03:21.720 Tipping point for you to realize that you were burnt out? 0:03:21.960 --> 0:03:24.841 I guess, to be honest, I saw it coming months 0:03:24.881 --> 0:03:28.881 in advance, and I felt it building, and I felt 0:03:28.881 --> 0:03:31.841 like I wasn't in control of my work schedule, which 0:03:31.881 --> 0:03:34.361 I was, but I didn't feel in control of it, 0:03:34.401 --> 0:03:36.561 like I had commitments to clients that I needed to 0:03:36.561 --> 0:03:38.681 see through and deliver, and I didn't feel like I 0:03:38.681 --> 0:03:40.561 could take the break that I knew that I needed 0:03:41.561 --> 0:03:44.961 and several months later, four or five months later, I 0:03:45.041 --> 0:03:48.041 was sitting outside of Coals with a shopping trolley full 0:03:48.041 --> 0:03:51.001 of groceries, and I sat on a bench and I realized, 0:03:52.241 --> 0:03:57.321 I'm cooked. I'm done. I've got nothing left. And I 0:03:57.401 --> 0:04:01.521 rang my mentor and said to him, I've got a problem. 0:04:01.961 --> 0:04:04.481 I'm at Coal's with my groceries and I don't think 0:04:04.481 --> 0:04:05.241 I can get home. 0:04:05.321 --> 0:04:08.321 What one little thing happened that made you just tipped 0:04:08.361 --> 0:04:09.001 you over the age. 0:04:09.041 --> 0:04:11.481 I don't think it's ever one little thing. I think 0:04:11.521 --> 0:04:14.641 I was traveling relentlessly. I was been through a divorce, 0:04:14.761 --> 0:04:18.081 so I was financially having to take care of myself, 0:04:18.601 --> 0:04:23.001 and I was really over committed in my work, traveling 0:04:23.320 --> 0:04:28.361 every week of the month, and I'd moved house to Brisbane, 0:04:28.681 --> 0:04:31.160 and all of that I think just added up. Maybe 0:04:31.161 --> 0:04:33.161 the straw that broke the camel's back was the trip 0:04:33.201 --> 0:04:36.321 to Cohole's. I don't know, but I I knew I was. 0:04:36.721 --> 0:04:40.161 I was depleted. Like I wasn't depressed. I was interested. 0:04:40.241 --> 0:04:43.840 Actually at the time, I thought, what is this burnout? 0:04:44.281 --> 0:04:48.241 And I googled it and the World Health Organization has 0:04:48.241 --> 0:04:50.801 a definition of burnout, and just to put it in 0:04:51.121 --> 0:04:56.801 very high level summary terms. It's when you're depleted, not depressed, 0:04:57.081 --> 0:04:59.961 just depleted. There's nothing left in the tank. Your energy 0:05:00.121 --> 0:05:03.681 is so low you're not productive. So even when I 0:05:03.721 --> 0:05:06.121 opened the laptop and want to to work, I couldn't. 0:05:06.121 --> 0:05:09.200 It was like the brain wasn't working or computing. You 0:05:09.320 --> 0:05:11.881 start to care less. It's kind of like you run 0:05:11.921 --> 0:05:14.561 out of fs to give, if I can say that, 0:05:15.241 --> 0:05:16.601 And you might want to give them, but they've got 0:05:16.601 --> 0:05:19.721 none left to give. And so it's that depletion, the 0:05:19.841 --> 0:05:23.041 lack of productivity and just the inability to care anymore 0:05:23.440 --> 0:05:27.520 that characterizes burnout in their definition, And that really resonated 0:05:27.561 --> 0:05:30.201 with me. So by the time I did get home 0:05:30.241 --> 0:05:33.001 and unload my groceries, and I took a few weeks off, 0:05:33.361 --> 0:05:36.001 and then I realized that's not going to do it. 0:05:36.641 --> 0:05:41.121 Taking a few weeks off after deep burnout didn't even 0:05:41.201 --> 0:05:44.561 touch the sides of healing and recovery. And it's taken 0:05:44.681 --> 0:05:48.401 me four years down the track now and I would 0:05:48.440 --> 0:05:51.440 say I'm still in recovery from burnout. Wow, I'm far 0:05:51.521 --> 0:05:55.361 more productive. I'm probably back at full capacity, but I 0:05:55.521 --> 0:05:58.760 work and live far differently now as a result of 0:05:58.761 --> 0:05:59.521 that experience. 0:05:59.841 --> 0:06:03.561 So you are very aware of triggers and how you're feeling. 0:06:03.721 --> 0:06:09.681 Yeah, exercise, yes, diet, look, yes, it's all those things 0:06:09.721 --> 0:06:13.801 like if you're burning out now, sure rest, eat a vegetable, 0:06:13.961 --> 0:06:15.961 go for a walk in the sunshine, get some water 0:06:16.081 --> 0:06:20.241 on board, drink a little less right, do those things 0:06:20.281 --> 0:06:24.361 for sure. But for me, my biggest realization through this 0:06:24.440 --> 0:06:29.080 process was that's all surface level stuff. What's underneath that 0:06:29.521 --> 0:06:34.200 is your pattern of thinking and being at work and 0:06:34.281 --> 0:06:39.521 how you approach work and how you busy yourself with work. 0:06:39.641 --> 0:06:43.001 In my case, I speak for myself. I busied myself 0:06:43.041 --> 0:06:44.760 with work so that I didn't have to face some 0:06:44.841 --> 0:06:47.281 deeper issues that were going on. You know, in my 0:06:47.440 --> 0:06:50.721 history and in my life, seemed like the easiest thing 0:06:50.761 --> 0:06:53.561 to do was to get busy with work until I 0:06:53.641 --> 0:06:56.481 burned myself out doing that. So you know, when you 0:06:56.521 --> 0:07:00.681 talk about exercise and healthy living, sure do that, it's 0:07:00.721 --> 0:07:04.160 a no brainer. But underneath that, you can take a break, 0:07:04.201 --> 0:07:06.801 you can take a holiday, you can eat well, but 0:07:06.880 --> 0:07:09.601 if you return to work and work in the same 0:07:09.641 --> 0:07:11.441 pattern that you did that burned you out, you'll just 0:07:11.481 --> 0:07:12.321 get back there quicker. 0:07:12.601 --> 0:07:16.321 What do you recommend for nurses who don't have those options, 0:07:16.321 --> 0:07:17.641 Like they have to go to work, they have to 0:07:17.641 --> 0:07:20.201 do the shift work they're employed to do, you know, 0:07:20.241 --> 0:07:23.201 three four days a week, full time. How do you 0:07:23.241 --> 0:07:25.161 manage that? Then, if you're a shift worker. 0:07:25.481 --> 0:07:29.961 I think if you're still able to work even though 0:07:29.961 --> 0:07:32.801 you've got a high pressure, fast paced environment, you've got 0:07:32.841 --> 0:07:36.121 to address your internal dialogue to allow yourself some grace 0:07:36.201 --> 0:07:39.281 and compassion and to be present in the experience so 0:07:39.321 --> 0:07:43.721 that you're kind to yourself in that testing experience. Because 0:07:43.721 --> 0:07:48.521 I think what we can do is harden ourselves to 0:07:48.641 --> 0:07:52.801 our work environment, harden our minds, harden our hearts, harden 0:07:53.241 --> 0:07:58.201 professional relationships just to get through the shift, and I 0:07:58.241 --> 0:08:01.761 think over time that does not contribute to a person's 0:08:01.801 --> 0:08:03.921 health and well being. It's kind of like you can't 0:08:03.961 --> 0:08:08.081 do anything about the external environment, the environment outside of you. 0:08:08.081 --> 0:08:10.841 You're still going to be on shift in a caring 0:08:10.921 --> 0:08:14.921 situation with multiple people who need you at one time, 0:08:15.121 --> 0:08:18.721 with reports and administration to take care of all of 0:08:18.721 --> 0:08:22.881 that continues. What you can change is the internal dialogue 0:08:22.881 --> 0:08:24.721 that you have with yourself, and it needs to be 0:08:24.761 --> 0:08:26.881 one of kindness and compassion and grace. 0:08:27.121 --> 0:08:29.881 I know from experience, the other route is so much 0:08:29.881 --> 0:08:32.001 easier to take than being kind to yourself. You know, 0:08:32.081 --> 0:08:36.441 we beat ourselves up, burnout, depression, anxiety, and the shame 0:08:36.561 --> 0:08:40.881 around the word psychiatric. For me, there shouldn't be, but 0:08:41.041 --> 0:08:43.721 it's visceral, like you nearly recoil when you hear the 0:08:43.761 --> 0:08:47.281 word psychiatric if you've been down that pathway. I just 0:08:47.361 --> 0:08:51.401 find it one of those words that just stereotypically shareful, 0:08:52.361 --> 0:08:55.801 being kind and caring for yourself and that internal dialogue 0:08:55.841 --> 0:08:58.081 is really hard when you've come from a place where 0:08:58.081 --> 0:09:04.401 you just overworked, underappreciated, have had some depression, anxiety, stress. 0:09:04.481 --> 0:09:07.601 I mean, my mind goes straight to emergency department and 0:09:07.601 --> 0:09:09.641 what those guys deal with on a day to day, 0:09:09.761 --> 0:09:13.721 out our minute to minute basis. How do you mitigate 0:09:13.881 --> 0:09:19.281 those issues around self talk and looking after yourself? And 0:09:20.041 --> 0:09:22.681 I don't know, it's really tough well and I don't 0:09:22.681 --> 0:09:23.561 think they're doing it well. 0:09:23.681 --> 0:09:26.841 I have done some consulting in hospitals where I've worked 0:09:26.841 --> 0:09:31.641 with both management of the hospital and with the nurses 0:09:31.681 --> 0:09:34.241 who manage the teams on the boards. I think there 0:09:34.241 --> 0:09:37.241 are a couple of components to how to deal with this, 0:09:38.081 --> 0:09:40.081 you know, because I'm a leadership coach. Of course, I'm 0:09:40.081 --> 0:09:43.681 going to say leadership skills. You've got to be leading yourself. 0:09:43.721 --> 0:09:46.001 If you're a leader, you've got to be leading yourself 0:09:46.041 --> 0:09:50.361 well before you can lead anyone else well with credibility. Right. 0:09:50.681 --> 0:09:56.961 The second thing would be to build a functional and constructive, 0:09:57.281 --> 0:10:01.761 healthy team. That's your responsibility. And if you're on a team, 0:10:01.801 --> 0:10:04.561 if you're not in a leadership position, then your responsibility 0:10:04.601 --> 0:10:07.841 is to show in a way that contributes to being 0:10:08.001 --> 0:10:11.441 constructive and functional. And perhaps you know just because your 0:10:11.441 --> 0:10:14.881 team is playing not a great standard or a lower 0:10:14.921 --> 0:10:17.121 standard than that right now, and doesn't mean you need 0:10:17.161 --> 0:10:19.841 to fall into that as well. You need to maintain 0:10:19.881 --> 0:10:24.441 your own integrity and identity and sense of yourself in this. 0:10:24.721 --> 0:10:27.201 And so when you feel like you're starting to lose 0:10:27.281 --> 0:10:31.761 some of your humanity at work, I think it's a 0:10:31.841 --> 0:10:38.041 moment for pause as far as your day to day experience. Again, 0:10:38.081 --> 0:10:41.601 I'm not a nurse, so I won't preach, but I 0:10:41.601 --> 0:10:44.921 can let you know a strategy that I've personally used, 0:10:45.241 --> 0:10:47.521 and that's to just simply be present in the moment 0:10:47.641 --> 0:10:50.481 that we're in. You know, we're both having a busy 0:10:50.561 --> 0:10:52.441 day to day. We've got lots of things going on 0:10:52.521 --> 0:10:58.321 in our world. But right now I'm allowing myself the 0:10:58.441 --> 0:11:02.361 experience of being fully present here with you, and I 0:11:02.401 --> 0:11:06.961 find that quite calming and soothing. There's some acceptance. I 0:11:07.001 --> 0:11:09.521 think if you're a nurse on a water on a 0:11:09.561 --> 0:11:14.761 shift that Okay, I'm here right now helping the person 0:11:14.801 --> 0:11:17.121 that's in front of me, and I'm doing my best, 0:11:17.761 --> 0:11:20.321 and then I'm going to go and help the next person. 0:11:20.641 --> 0:11:22.841 The better I take care of myself in the process. 0:11:22.881 --> 0:11:24.601 And I know nurses who don't go to the toilet 0:11:24.681 --> 0:11:28.001 or eat, you know, throughout the course of their shift. 0:11:28.681 --> 0:11:31.121 And you know, we can all suffer from that in 0:11:31.161 --> 0:11:34.201 our professional lives to some degree. But the better you 0:11:34.281 --> 0:11:36.481 take care of yourself, the better you're able to show 0:11:36.521 --> 0:11:40.481 up constructive and functional for your team, for your patients 0:11:40.561 --> 0:11:41.081 or clients. 0:11:41.161 --> 0:11:43.521 In my case, it's nearly like a badge of honor. 0:11:44.201 --> 0:11:46.081 This is go I have an eving to the toilet today. 0:11:46.241 --> 0:11:49.761 I think as a coach, I'm encouraging people to be 0:11:49.841 --> 0:11:55.121 in full self responsibility. So that means that even when 0:11:55.161 --> 0:11:58.001 we're employed, even when we don't have our own businesses, 0:11:58.481 --> 0:12:01.081 we don't get to blame the people around us for 0:12:01.161 --> 0:12:05.001 how we show up, we can always remember our choice 0:12:05.441 --> 0:12:08.001 to show up as constructive and functional as we can 0:12:08.041 --> 0:12:10.521 be in this moment. And if that means I remember 0:12:10.521 --> 0:12:13.601 to drink some water and go to the bathroom and 0:12:13.881 --> 0:12:16.961 eat something and just sit down for a moment or two, 0:12:17.281 --> 0:12:20.121 even if it is on the toilet, to compose yourself 0:12:21.041 --> 0:12:27.561 guaranteed quiet time comes with me. Just to take those 0:12:27.881 --> 0:12:33.761 little moments for yourself, to preserve your groundedness and scentsiveness 0:12:34.041 --> 0:12:38.441 and internal calm throughout the day, even when you're what's 0:12:38.481 --> 0:12:41.441 going on in your external environment is chaos, and that's 0:12:41.481 --> 0:12:44.561 you in full self responsibility for taking care of yourself. 0:12:44.841 --> 0:12:48.241 I just completed a course with doctor Wendy Macintosh about 0:12:48.321 --> 0:12:51.761 boundaries and ethics, and it was brilliant. She talks about 0:12:51.761 --> 0:12:55.961 the limbic system and how it controls you know, stress, anxiety, 0:12:56.401 --> 0:13:02.321 and how controlled breath is so underutilized but so powerful. 0:13:02.521 --> 0:13:06.161 You know, the box, the box breathing, box breathing is 0:13:06.561 --> 0:13:09.001 so good, but we forget to do it. 0:13:09.361 --> 0:13:10.881 And the way I always explained to me, and the 0:13:10.921 --> 0:13:14.160 way I teach my clients is that you would inhale 0:13:15.081 --> 0:13:18.121 for say, account of four, hold for account of four, 0:13:18.521 --> 0:13:21.521 exhale for account of four and then hold for another 0:13:21.641 --> 0:13:24.641 count of four before you inhale again from account of four, 0:13:24.681 --> 0:13:26.921 and you repeat that cycle, and you can imagine in 0:13:26.961 --> 0:13:30.241 your mind that you're creating a box shape for that 0:13:30.361 --> 0:13:35.201 count of four. And what that does is allows you 0:13:35.281 --> 0:13:39.001 to spend less time breathing in. It creates that anxious 0:13:39.921 --> 0:13:45.761 state and more time being present and through your exhale. 0:13:46.161 --> 0:13:49.481 And I'm no doctor or scientist, but I understand that 0:13:49.561 --> 0:13:53.601 this activates within your nervous system a calming response. 0:13:53.721 --> 0:13:57.161 In summary makes such a difference, and it makes you 0:13:57.281 --> 0:13:59.561 present in the moment because you can't think of anything else. 0:13:59.681 --> 0:14:02.761 You've got to think of that. They suggest that in 0:14:02.881 --> 0:14:05.481 high stress situations, if you can take the time even 0:14:05.481 --> 0:14:08.921 to do a couple of those cycles, it brings that 0:14:09.561 --> 0:14:13.801 racing heart down, the adrenaline drops, It helps you make 0:14:13.841 --> 0:14:16.001 a better decision in a really stressful moment. 0:14:16.401 --> 0:14:19.361 You can feel it in your body, that visceral relaxation. 0:14:19.641 --> 0:14:21.521 I think the trick is to remember to do it. 0:14:21.841 --> 0:14:25.041 I prefer to think about how can I tune into 0:14:25.081 --> 0:14:27.801 the signals of my body and to be alert to 0:14:27.881 --> 0:14:30.561 those that if I'm feeling tightness in my chest or 0:14:30.561 --> 0:14:32.721 a bit sick in my tummy, or if I've got 0:14:32.761 --> 0:14:35.481 tension in my jaw or my shoulders or a headache, 0:14:36.001 --> 0:14:39.281 how can I be observant and tuned into those signals 0:14:39.721 --> 0:14:44.001 and allow that to be informing my response. So I'm 0:14:44.041 --> 0:14:47.641 really honoring the signals from my body, because when you 0:14:47.721 --> 0:14:49.881 think about it, it was the fact that we weren't 0:14:49.921 --> 0:14:52.001 doing that that led us into burnout. 0:14:52.241 --> 0:14:56.321 My dream would be to have my own art studio, 0:14:57.001 --> 0:14:59.161 have a kiln out the back, you know, an easel 0:14:59.201 --> 0:15:01.641 at the front, the dog running around, and just do 0:15:02.121 --> 0:15:05.481 art and craft like seriously, that to me would heaven. 0:15:05.521 --> 0:15:07.241 Well, now that you've expressed it and put it out 0:15:07.241 --> 0:15:09.201 in the world, you're a step closer to that. 0:15:09.401 --> 0:15:12.561 We can only hope. It's an interesting thing how we 0:15:12.721 --> 0:15:16.201 as nurses as givers and here I've always thought of 0:15:16.241 --> 0:15:18.281 myself as a healer. We feel like we're not being 0:15:18.281 --> 0:15:19.361 good nurses if we're not. 0:15:20.801 --> 0:15:23.881 I love that. Yeah, thank you for saying that out loud. 0:15:24.641 --> 0:15:27.761 I'm not being a good nurse unless I'm giving. Logically, 0:15:28.081 --> 0:15:30.321 that doesn't sound right when you say it out loud, 0:15:30.481 --> 0:15:35.481 but emotionally, there's all sorts of things that drive nurses 0:15:35.721 --> 0:15:39.961 into this caring profession. As a patient, I've met nurses 0:15:40.001 --> 0:15:43.801 across the spectrum of like really beautifully present and caring 0:15:43.921 --> 0:15:46.961 through to hardened and treating me like a number in 0:15:47.361 --> 0:15:51.441 a machine. And as a consultant in hospitals working with 0:15:51.561 --> 0:15:57.201 leadership teams, I see nurses deploying those strategies as coping 0:15:57.241 --> 0:16:02.681 mechanisms because they're fatigued by showing so much compassion and 0:16:02.801 --> 0:16:06.601 drawing on that empty cup. And some of the models 0:16:06.641 --> 0:16:09.681 and frames that I teach in leadership coaching and on 0:16:09.721 --> 0:16:12.481 the leadership programs are all about how can I be 0:16:12.521 --> 0:16:15.321 in full self responsibility for filling my own cup, not 0:16:15.361 --> 0:16:18.081 expecting my boss to do it, not expecting my organization 0:16:18.201 --> 0:16:20.201 to do it, although would be nice if they offered 0:16:20.201 --> 0:16:23.321 some more support, but how do I be more in 0:16:23.481 --> 0:16:28.921 charge of my own experience? And it's everything from what 0:16:29.001 --> 0:16:31.321 we've discussed, taking the breaks in the healthy food, but 0:16:31.521 --> 0:16:34.161 just allowing yourself full presence in the moment. 0:16:34.721 --> 0:16:36.961 I worry that we're going to end up going down 0:16:37.001 --> 0:16:42.321 that whole American insurance healthcare. I am someone that believes 0:16:42.441 --> 0:16:45.801 there should be free healthcare for all. I'm also realistic 0:16:45.921 --> 0:16:48.521 enough to realize how much it costs because I run 0:16:48.521 --> 0:16:50.761 my own clinic, and I know how much it costs 0:16:50.801 --> 0:16:55.441 every week to keep those doors open from insurance laser licensing. 0:16:55.841 --> 0:16:59.881 It is expensive, so I can only imagine how much 0:16:59.961 --> 0:17:03.121 it costs to keep a major hospital open. So I 0:17:03.161 --> 0:17:06.041 have no doubt that at some stack we're all don't 0:17:06.080 --> 0:17:09.001 have to pay for healthcare in some way or another. 0:17:09.160 --> 0:17:10.600 I don't think it can be free forever. 0:17:10.761 --> 0:17:14.000 If you want to maintain a good organizational culture, then 0:17:14.041 --> 0:17:18.080 you've got to consider the realities of those commercial drivers 0:17:18.120 --> 0:17:22.360 and constraints with the human factors. And I feel like 0:17:22.481 --> 0:17:25.120 that's where we're possibly a little out of balance in 0:17:25.160 --> 0:17:29.801 the workplace. At the moment. We're quite concerned with compliance 0:17:30.080 --> 0:17:35.360 and profitability, and if we have to dehumanize the experience 0:17:35.400 --> 0:17:37.321 of work to achieve that, then that's what we do. 0:17:37.481 --> 0:17:39.761 And I think that that will have a consequence not 0:17:39.840 --> 0:17:42.721 just for individuals in the workplace, but for the overall 0:17:43.241 --> 0:17:45.200 experience of work in the long term. 0:17:45.321 --> 0:17:48.080 I thought, just pop into my head, and you might 0:17:48.080 --> 0:17:49.920 be able to sort of give us a little bit 0:17:49.921 --> 0:17:54.281 of an idea, your opinion within the aesthetic space where 0:17:54.681 --> 0:17:59.400 I work, cosmic dematology, I as a nurse, don't feel 0:17:59.400 --> 0:18:04.281 like I should charge more than the other staff in 0:18:04.321 --> 0:18:09.240 my business. However, I've got fifteen years more experience, and 0:18:09.321 --> 0:18:12.640 yet because I'm a nurse as practitioner, I feel like 0:18:13.160 --> 0:18:18.600 I can't charge more than my team. However, I'll make 0:18:18.681 --> 0:18:21.920 down the road who's done two years of injecting? But 0:18:22.080 --> 0:18:24.920 is a doctor. I'm not banking doctors. I have some 0:18:25.041 --> 0:18:29.881 amazing friends and colleagues that are medical practitioners. He charges 0:18:30.041 --> 0:18:33.241 four dollars more a unit for an anti wrinkle treatment. 0:18:33.481 --> 0:18:34.920 What is the psyche with that? 0:18:35.160 --> 0:18:37.360 Well, he doesn't have the limiting beliefs that you have. 0:18:37.961 --> 0:18:39.841 But why do so many nurses have that? 0:18:40.001 --> 0:18:43.601 I think it's human nature. One, you're in a hierarchy 0:18:43.640 --> 0:18:46.880 and a hospital environment and nurses iientifically at the top. 0:18:47.801 --> 0:18:51.561 So there's that aspect. I think it is also human 0:18:51.721 --> 0:18:55.641 nature to have some what we call limiting beliefs. So 0:18:55.681 --> 0:18:57.761 as part of my practice as a leadership coach, I 0:18:57.840 --> 0:19:02.801 do neurolinguistic programming. Part of that practice is to identify 0:19:02.880 --> 0:19:06.041 what are the limiting beliefs that I have. Stories that 0:19:06.080 --> 0:19:08.440 I've told myself over and over again so much so 0:19:08.521 --> 0:19:11.440 that they've become true for me, whether they're true or not. 0:19:12.640 --> 0:19:15.321 How do we start to challenge some of those limiting beliefs. 0:19:15.840 --> 0:19:21.080 So for you, there's something underlying there, something deeper around 0:19:21.080 --> 0:19:25.041 my worth and my value and my ability to express 0:19:25.080 --> 0:19:29.321 that is being constrained by a story of not good enough, 0:19:29.721 --> 0:19:33.041 not deserving, you know, don't add enough value. Yeah, what 0:19:33.080 --> 0:19:35.881 does it mean if I charge as much as a doctor? 0:19:35.880 --> 0:19:38.920 Do I have tickets on myself? Some of these sorts 0:19:38.921 --> 0:19:41.281 of beliefs, you know, they're pretty common. 0:19:41.160 --> 0:19:44.801 Oh so common in nursing that you know, she thinks 0:19:44.801 --> 0:19:47.240 you should be a doctor, or it is such a 0:19:47.281 --> 0:19:48.281 tall poppy syndrome. 0:19:48.481 --> 0:19:50.720 Yeah, and so if you had a belief that was 0:19:50.761 --> 0:19:53.561 different to the rest of your team, then you wouldn't 0:19:53.561 --> 0:19:55.840 be fitting in. You'd be isolated. You could be you know, 0:19:55.880 --> 0:19:58.600 picked on, bullied. You know, it's quite a tribe. What 0:19:58.640 --> 0:20:01.240 we call a tribal mentality is that you want to 0:20:01.281 --> 0:20:04.881 fit in, and fitting in means that you have those limiting, 0:20:05.080 --> 0:20:08.041 subservient beliefs, and that's what you'll do to fit in. 0:20:08.801 --> 0:20:13.241 The people that I work with are tired of that mindset. 0:20:13.360 --> 0:20:15.680 It's been brought into their awareness one way or the 0:20:15.681 --> 0:20:17.321 other that I've got that mindset, the I've got those 0:20:17.321 --> 0:20:21.721 beliefs operating and they don't want them anymore. So through 0:20:21.761 --> 0:20:26.440 the process of neurolinguistic programming and a particular tool within 0:20:26.521 --> 0:20:30.600 that suite called timeline therapy, I'd be looking to understand 0:20:30.640 --> 0:20:32.880 what are those limiting beliefs and how do we start 0:20:32.880 --> 0:20:36.520 to challenge and diffuse the effect of those limiting beliefs 0:20:36.640 --> 0:20:38.840 so that you could replace them with more positive ones. 0:20:40.160 --> 0:20:42.521 So you know, why don't you value yourself enough and 0:20:42.640 --> 0:20:45.321 charge enough? Well, that's I believe often at the heart 0:20:45.321 --> 0:20:47.761 of it, no matter what you put on your pricing schedule, 0:20:48.201 --> 0:20:50.480 no matter how good your marketing is or your sales 0:20:50.521 --> 0:20:53.160 conversation is, at the end of the day, underneath that, 0:20:53.281 --> 0:20:55.241 you've got to believe that you're worth it and feel 0:20:55.241 --> 0:20:59.841 aligned and comfortable in what you charge, and that requires 0:20:59.921 --> 0:21:03.121 some self awareness and self development. I would say something 0:21:03.160 --> 0:21:05.880 I'd noticed about the medical profession, and it's the same 0:21:06.201 --> 0:21:08.801 in academia as well and some of the other more 0:21:08.840 --> 0:21:12.161 traditional disciplines. When we think about how we develop ourselves 0:21:12.160 --> 0:21:14.681 and become more confident and competent so that we can 0:21:14.801 --> 0:21:17.761 charge our worth. We do what you've done up until now, 0:21:17.801 --> 0:21:22.201 and that's invest in your discipline. In education, within your discipline, 0:21:22.281 --> 0:21:25.001 and unless you meet that with a degree of leadership 0:21:25.041 --> 0:21:28.160 and personal development, in my experience, then you'll be a 0:21:28.321 --> 0:21:32.640 very knowledgeable individual with very poor self awareness, self leadership, 0:21:32.640 --> 0:21:35.720 self regulation, and self worth. And so you need to 0:21:35.801 --> 0:21:40.400 balance all of your nursing knowledge with the knowledge, the tools, 0:21:40.721 --> 0:21:44.480 the theories, concepts, frames, practices that allow you to become 0:21:44.761 --> 0:21:48.400 whole feel whole more of the time as a person. 0:21:48.561 --> 0:21:52.561 I've gone off and done work on boundaries, ethics as 0:21:52.561 --> 0:21:55.920 well as my own professional development. But to round that 0:21:56.001 --> 0:21:59.561 all off and to be a really great nurse leader 0:21:59.840 --> 0:22:03.921 business owner also should come in and do some work 0:22:03.921 --> 0:22:08.080 on leadership skills and personal developed personal development. I'm putting 0:22:08.080 --> 0:22:09.281 all of that together. 0:22:09.201 --> 0:22:11.400 So that you can be a whole human at work 0:22:11.441 --> 0:22:13.160 and a whole human at home. And you're actually the 0:22:13.201 --> 0:22:15.360 same human, you know. 0:22:15.801 --> 0:22:17.681 So regardless of where you are. So you don't put 0:22:17.721 --> 0:22:19.281 on your nursing hat, and you don't or your work 0:22:19.321 --> 0:22:22.920 hat and your home hat. That's ange and that's ae 0:22:23.041 --> 0:22:23.961 work and ange at home. 0:22:24.201 --> 0:22:27.801 I personally have thrown out the idea that I'm going 0:22:27.801 --> 0:22:30.801