Speaker 1: She said, it's now never I got fighting in my blood.
Speaker 2: I'm tiff. This is Roll with the Punches and we're
Speaker 2: turning life's hardest hits into wins. Nobody wants to go
Speaker 2: to court, and don't. My friends are test Art Family Lawyers.
Speaker 2: Know that they offer all forms of alternative dispute resolution.
Speaker 2: Their team of Melbourne family lawyers have extensive experience in
Speaker 2: all areas of family law to facto and same sex couples,
Speaker 2: custody and children, family violence and intervention orders, property settlements
Speaker 2: and financial agreements. Test Art is in your corner, so
Speaker 2: reach out to Mark and the team at www dot
Speaker 2: test Artfamilylawyers dot com dot au. Tracy Lund, welcome to
Speaker 2: Roll with the Punches.
Speaker 3: The're going Ticknye. It's good to be here.
Speaker 2: Thank you for coming on. I appreciate it. I wish
Speaker 2: that I could have my usual tone of excitement, and
Speaker 2: I wish that I could say I've been excited about this,
Speaker 2: I'm looking forward to it. I'm looking forward to making
Speaker 2: a difference. But you popped up on my LinkedIn feed
Speaker 2: the other day with stuff I didn't want to have
Speaker 2: to be reading.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I am sorry that I did that to you.
Speaker 3: Our family is facing some really significant trauma that the
Speaker 3: news for us was catastrophic that my husband is has
Speaker 3: been diagnosed with stage four esophagal cancer that has spread
Speaker 3: throughout his body. So we are at the moment on
Speaker 3: very very limited time, you know, maybe weeks left with Simon.
Speaker 3: And I would just say to your listeners, you know,
Speaker 3: I know there's so many people out there experiencing supporting
Speaker 3: loved ones that are terminally ill, and I just my
Speaker 3: heart goes out to them, and you know, it's a
Speaker 3: big emotional rollercoaster. In our case. Simon has worked for
Speaker 3: the CFA for over twenty five nearly twenty six years.
Speaker 3: Actually I think it is twenty six years. I could
Speaker 3: have that day slightly wrong. It's been a long time
Speaker 3: and quord of a century, yeah, as sweet a long time.
Speaker 3: And the reason you did see that post is not
Speaker 3: because that we were wanting to make any announcements about
Speaker 3: Simon's condition. In fact, for the last seven odd months,
Speaker 3: we have kept it very close and very to us.
Speaker 3: It's a deeply personal journey and the very last thing
Speaker 3: that we wanted for our family and our children and
Speaker 3: the limited time that we had together was to be
Speaker 3: discussing Simon's condition publicly. As we've moved through, I guess
Speaker 3: the processes that are involved when somebody is exposed at
Speaker 3: work and has a you know, I guess a workplace injury.
Speaker 3: We you know, we've been working through quite a lot
Speaker 3: of things and one of the things that has come up,
Speaker 3: and I guess in some ways, we you know, we are,
Speaker 3: we're aware, but not actually understanding the implications of the legislation.
Speaker 3: And that's presumptive legislation that I'm talking about, and who
Speaker 3: it does and who it doesn't cover. So what we
Speaker 3: are the presumptive legislation as it stands now covers fire,
Speaker 3: firefighters and dmos, and that means that the bitterment of
Speaker 3: proof is already there that you know, if they have
Speaker 3: one of those cancers that is under that legislation, that
Speaker 3: it is given that they were they were exposed at
Speaker 3: work or during their their working time. Assimon's title isn't
Speaker 3: firefighter or demo. He predominantly works in logistics and he
Speaker 3: so you know, he is frontline. So CFA staff that
Speaker 3: are given movement orders to get to attend incidents become frontline.
Speaker 3: They are on the front line and they have the
Speaker 3: same exposure as our firefighters and our demos. But and
Speaker 3: they work as one.
Speaker 2: So the what DMO stands for.
Speaker 3: District Mechanical Officer so and they were added about two
Speaker 3: years ago to the legislation. So what's become obvious is
Speaker 3: that there is a glaring gap in the legislation that
Speaker 3: doesn't cover CFA staff who are frontline, who are and
Speaker 3: I'll use the term operational, who become operational during those
Speaker 3: emergencies that we have and we know, you know, just
Speaker 3: in Victoria, there's been so many that we have had
Speaker 3: responding to fires and big incidents that us quite a
Speaker 3: long time. So there's a number of staffing roles that
Speaker 3: are there and that are required to support those incidents
Speaker 3: to happen. Those you know, they're logistic pieces and we
Speaker 3: can't do it, you know, you can't have those responses
Speaker 3: without them. So a motto in the among the emergency
Speaker 3: services is we work as one. So you know, we
Speaker 3: work as one, and I keep reflecting on that. So
Speaker 3: we do work as one, and they do, they absolutely do.
Speaker 3: So the agencies all come together and all parts of
Speaker 3: them come together to respond to incidents like we see
Speaker 3: black Saturday Black. Some are you know, all of them,
Speaker 3: but they're not covered as one under the legislation, and
Speaker 3: that has been the I guess the take home piece
Speaker 3: for us that we as a family feel really deeply
Speaker 3: strongly about that needs to be addressed and needs to
Speaker 3: be changed because it change the outcome for Simon and
Speaker 3: myself and my family, but families that come after us
Speaker 3: and staff that come after us, and there will be
Speaker 3: people that will be exposed and will be find themselves
Speaker 3: with terminal illnesses or lifelong health issues because of their work,
Speaker 3: because of their frontline response, that will not be covered.
Speaker 3: And so we want to change that. And Simon knows
Speaker 3: that this is a legacy piece and it's a piece
Speaker 3: that he's probably not going to see happen, but we
Speaker 3: have committed as a family to raise awareness about it,
Speaker 3: to ensure our community understands it, because even being in
Speaker 3: the services as long as we have, we probably didn't
Speaker 3: have that broader understanding of the implications of some being
Speaker 3: covered and some not under the presumptive legislation. But we
Speaker 3: do now. And when you know something's wrong, you know
Speaker 3: you you know you do do what you can to
Speaker 3: improve it or change that. So we're committed to raising
Speaker 3: awareness and ultimately having the legislation amended to address this
Speaker 3: gap so that frontline CFA. Sed UP are covered.
Speaker 2: Ah okay, can we.
Speaker 3: It's a lot soide.
Speaker 2: Oh, so much running through my mind and so much
Speaker 2: kind of emotion like this I'm processing so much, but
Speaker 2: also processing perhaps for the sake of myself and those
Speaker 2: of us who aren't familiar with one the legislation for
Speaker 2: frontline workers and policies and people like even just like
Speaker 2: part of me was going, what what you can be
Speaker 2: a fight? You can go and be a the amazing
Speaker 2: heroic fireman and you and you might get a terminal illness.
Speaker 2: Like that's a thing, and that's the thing that people
Speaker 2: know about. So that's a thing that has something in
Speaker 2: place for some people, Like, so can you explain what's
Speaker 2: in place and how it's protecting people and then who
Speaker 2: it's leaving out.
Speaker 3: So I think it was back in twenty nineteen we
Speaker 3: had the introduction of presumptive legislation, and that means that
Speaker 3: there's a number of cancers and illnesses that are considered
Speaker 3: job related exposure. So if you know, if you if
Speaker 3: you're a firefighter and you find yourself with one of
Speaker 3: those diseases. You know, it's automatically covered. So what that
Speaker 3: means is that you don't then have the burden of proof.
Speaker 3: And this is very you know, very much my simplified
Speaker 3: version of this. I'm not a lawyer or anything, so
Speaker 3: I just want to don't take I don't want any
Speaker 3: of your viewers to think that that's what I'm speaking from,
Speaker 3: because I'm not. It's just a wife's experience of this.
Speaker 3: That means that the burden of proof is not on you.
Speaker 3: It's just accepted that that was a result of the
Speaker 3: exposure of the carcinogens that you've breathed in during your
Speaker 3: time of responding to incidences, so a smoke related and
Speaker 3: toxic because that's what happens. That's part of your role.
Speaker 3: And if you are a DMO, a district mechanical officer,
Speaker 3: and a firefighter, then you won't have that burden of
Speaker 3: proof if you're not. And so in the case of
Speaker 3: Simon his PTA staff IT technical support, he goes out
Speaker 3: onto staging grounds and sets you know, sets up the
Speaker 3: staging grounds and the it IT systems, things like that,
Speaker 3: and he goes in and out of different exposures during
Speaker 3: various incidents and when he gets a movement order. So
Speaker 3: for example, when we had the mind fire here back
Speaker 3: in twenty fourteen, Simon sent up the incident Control Center
Speaker 3: at the mine and moved at two different times before
Speaker 3: it was moved into to realganized CC in Church dreat
Speaker 3: and Terraalgen, So there's significant exposure there for example. So
Speaker 3: because he's not one of those two roles, what it
Speaker 3: meant was that we have to work through a work
Speaker 3: safe sorry, we have to work through a work cover
Speaker 3: claim and that means the burden of proof is then
Speaker 3: on Simon to prove that he during his employment he
Speaker 3: has been exposed. So you know, it's things like getting
Speaker 3: together like pay slips, movement orders like there's you know,
Speaker 3: there's a body of information that has to be presented.
Speaker 3: So that for us was something we worked through and
Speaker 3: we were able to do, but it costs us precious
Speaker 3: time and it meant when he was ADDIE's most vulnerable
Speaker 3: and most done well, we were trying to pull together
Speaker 3: documentation that was required for the work cover process. So
Speaker 3: what we would like to see is the CEFA staff
Speaker 3: that are frontline, that have movement orders that go to
Speaker 3: incidences and if there is exposure that is recorded, and
Speaker 3: they do find themselves in a situation like you. We
Speaker 3: are that the burden of proof is not on them
Speaker 3: like that, because it's it's quite a lot of work
Speaker 3: to backtrack through twenty five years of work to remember
Speaker 3: we you know, the mean work out we were and
Speaker 3: put all that information together and it's actually having gone
Speaker 3: through it's a burden that you shouldn't have to carry
Speaker 3: when you're already dealing with what is a life changing
Speaker 3: event for your entire family and you are supporting somebody
Speaker 3: that is terminally ill and will pass away. The enormity
Speaker 3: of the emotions and the rollercoaster our family has been
Speaker 3: on cannot be underestimated. And it's such a like I
Speaker 3: can't tell you when we found out you know, what
Speaker 3: his illness was, and how sick he was going to get,
Speaker 3: and how very little time that we had this is
Speaker 3: a very aggressive cancer. It just took my breath away.
Speaker 3: And the sense of helplessness around a diagnosis like this
Speaker 3: is so compounding in your life. But then to have
Speaker 3: to somehow manage yourself and your family and get all
Speaker 3: these documents together and go through this process that you know,
Speaker 3: and as we got through it. You know, we started,
Speaker 3: I started to really look at that. You know, if
Speaker 3: he was a firefighter, we wouldn't have to do all that, like,
Speaker 3: we wouldn't have all this burden as well. And I
Speaker 3: think the gap is dangerously out of step with community
Speaker 3: expectations as well as people understand the role of our
Speaker 3: frontline and emergency responders and the exposure they have in
Speaker 3: their day to day jobs to protect us. And you know,
Speaker 3: we're seeing more and more incidents happen with climate change.
Speaker 3: You know, these fires and emergency situations that we are
Speaker 3: having are lasting longer, are happening more often, so there's
Speaker 3: more exposure than ever before. And I think that as
Speaker 3: a whole, as a community, as a society, we need
Speaker 3: our frontline workers, and we need every single one of them,
Speaker 3: but we also need to ensure that they're valued equally
Speaker 3: and they are supported equally. And I think for me,
Speaker 3: that is a glaring gap, and it's something that we
Speaker 3: can and we will fix.
Speaker 2: I don't even know how you are holding it together
Speaker 2: right now in this moment talking about it and also
Speaker 2: right now in your life dealing with it.
Speaker 3: So I'm not really Tiffany. I'll tell you that I
Speaker 3: I do have a public profile, and I do a
Speaker 3: lot of frontline work and have for a very long time.
Speaker 3: And over that decade or more, I've I've you know,
Speaker 3: developed skills around speaking around what I'm probably not that
Speaker 3: great today, pretty good our you know, issues that are
Speaker 3: important to our community, social justice issues, and I've always
Speaker 3: had that level of distance, if that makes sense, is
Speaker 3: that you know, it's not always you know, apart from
Speaker 3: this time, it's not necessarily happening to me or to
Speaker 3: my family. So one of the reasons that has taken
Speaker 3: us a while to I guess sort of bring this
Speaker 3: to a more public light is because there was it
Speaker 3: was such a heavy load for our entire family that
Speaker 3: it took us a number of months to work through
Speaker 3: and get to a point that we could publicly speak
Speaker 3: about one what was happening, and to the legislation, you know,
Speaker 3: the pieces around the legislation and what that looks like.
Speaker 3: Because for us and for as a family, and that
Speaker 3: you know, as you know Simon and I as life partners,
Speaker 3: I'll just share something maybe funny, but you know it's
Speaker 3: like when we first met all those years ago, we
Speaker 3: probably shouldn't have stayed together. We were absolutely polar opposites,
Speaker 3: So you know that song and it was around at
Speaker 3: the time when we were dating. It was polar Abdul
Speaker 3: opposites attract and it was you know, he liked to
Speaker 3: smoke and she doesn't, and he likes he's noisy and
Speaker 3: she's quite well that was us, and that was kind
Speaker 3: of our It's like like this song was made about us.
Speaker 3: You drive me crazy and very For such a long time,
Speaker 3: we were you know, as a very young you know,
Speaker 3: early twenties, we were sort of we always you know,
Speaker 3: I guess we're sort of that pull and push of
Speaker 3: you know, differences that we had, and I think many
Speaker 3: couples experienced that. And then over time and I can't
Speaker 3: tell you when, but at some point we started to
Speaker 3: look at what we had in common rather than what
Speaker 3: was what we didn't like about each other or how
Speaker 3: we were opposite. And the one thing that I think
Speaker 3: has made our relationship really strong, and certainly the work
Speaker 3: that we've done across both of our careers was our
Speaker 3: desire to respond to social justice issues in a service response.
Speaker 3: So Simon has stayed and worked at the CFA, and
Speaker 3: he's done an incredible amount of work. I can tell
Speaker 3: you now, the CFA brothers and sisters that have reached
Speaker 3: out from across the state has been like, yeah, it's
Speaker 3: just been overwhelming. So many people know him, so many
Speaker 3: people know his work. He's interacted with an enormous amount
Speaker 3: of people and had really positive influence engagement in some
Speaker 3: place change supported work. It's just been I actually knew
Speaker 3: that he was well known and well supported, but you know,
Speaker 3: to find out how big that is, it's just blown
Speaker 3: us all the way. And then support locally from our
Speaker 3: local brigades and local people is you know, second tan
Speaker 3: on it. It's been absolutely phenomenal. And then for me,
Speaker 3: my work has been around grassroots response in the Enabled
Speaker 3: House and I guess being quite vocal around what happened
Speaker 3: at the mind Fire and escalating that as a health
Speaker 3: disaster that was impacting our community. And we still see
Speaker 3: the legacy of you know, we see the legacy of
Speaker 3: that today. So it ended up being the common ground
Speaker 3: the service and the social justice responses and the need
Speaker 3: to respond was what we had in common. It wasn't
Speaker 3: the fact that he liked the TV loud and I
Speaker 3: liked it low and he's you know, you know, it
Speaker 3: was just you know, he liked to dance and I didn't.
Speaker 3: And you know, he's far more of an extrovert and
Speaker 3: I'm more of an introvert. I'm just thinking of the
Speaker 3: words of the songs. There was a whole bunch in
Speaker 3: that song. I'd have to play it again, but of opposites,
Speaker 3: and I don't know. Over the years, and as you
Speaker 3: get older and you start to appreciate different things about
Speaker 3: your partner and then realize it's actually not the differences,
Speaker 3: is my point. It's the you know, and you might
Speaker 3: only have a few common threads, but they are the
Speaker 3: powerful things that bring you back home to each other
Speaker 3: each night, and that you open the bottle of wine
Speaker 3: and you talk about your day, and you work out,
Speaker 3: and you map out what's next, and you know that
Speaker 3: person that's in your corner. And it's because of that
Speaker 3: that rounding of you know, of that belief that we've
Speaker 3: had around social justice issues being kinder, you know, there
Speaker 3: has to be a kinder in a better way, and
Speaker 3: our commitment to service and to serve. Yeah, so and
Speaker 3: that's something you know, we've certainly been reflecting on a lot,
Speaker 3: and we think we really both believe strongly that that
Speaker 3: is what we'll get this legislation change because we are
Speaker 3: committed to it, and we will just keep going, you know,
Speaker 3: until we get it changed and we raise awareness around
Speaker 3: what it actually looks like for staff that have movement
Speaker 3: orders that are then out in the field and then
Speaker 3: our front line at times when our state needs them
Speaker 3: the most.
Speaker 2: It's twenty nineteen feels so recent for a change like
Speaker 2: that as well. Like when you said twenty nineteen, I'm like,
Speaker 2: that was you yesterday.
Speaker 3: Look, look I guess I'm not really I won't. I
Speaker 3: won't be across. I know that that was certainly a
Speaker 3: push during the fire services reform. I'm not across you know,
Speaker 3: the detail or and there would be reasons why that
Speaker 3: it was firefighters to start with, and then later DMOS
Speaker 3: the district mechanical offices have been added, but it falls
Speaker 3: short in covering the people that are needed on the
Speaker 3: front line to actually, you know, support our community, our
Speaker 3: great state when it needs it the most. There are
Speaker 3: so many pieces to those operational works, and like I
Speaker 3: said that, we work as one. You know, we hear
Speaker 3: that a lot, and certainly am I work on the
Speaker 3: fringes of this, you know, I've heard that a lot
Speaker 3: over the last decade or more. And I couldn't help
Speaker 3: but think, but we're not covered as one. You know,
Speaker 3: we work as one, we are needed, we're all needed
Speaker 3: as one, but we're you know where the legislation treats
Speaker 3: some workers differently, and we need to fix that.
Speaker 2: It's a tough pill to swallow because, like as you
Speaker 2: were describing it, I was processing and thinking about it,
Speaker 2: and it's like it it's not like a work cover
Speaker 2: thing where I'll make and break his leg in footy
Speaker 2: and be like, oh, just wruck and I'll work cover.
Speaker 2: You know, it's like and numbers I wouldn't imagine in
Speaker 2: statistically are enormous that some bloody work cover place is
Speaker 2: going to be out of pocket for the whole thing. Like,
Speaker 2: but people are slipping through the cracks and it's not fair.
Speaker 3: Oh no, they definitely are. And I think that's the thing.
Speaker 3: You know, if you know, if we look at a
Speaker 3: work cover claim and it isn't like you described that,
Speaker 3: you may have broken a leg or you know, you
Speaker 3: know and I don't, you know, it is there as
Speaker 3: a safety net to support workers when injuries and accidents happen,
Speaker 3: and you know, it's absolutely should be but what we're
Speaker 3: talking about in terms of terminal illnesses and exposure to
Speaker 3: carcinogens and toxic smoke things like that. You know, it's
Speaker 3: very hard for me to wrap my head around how
Speaker 3: that is. You know, how you navigate that well through
Speaker 3: a work cover claim as well. And it's been it's
Speaker 3: been really tricky. So and I probably you know, am
Speaker 3: not keen to sort of talk about or unpack that
Speaker 3: too much because you know, it's a whole web that
Speaker 3: we you know, it's probably too complicated for me to
Speaker 3: go into. So the safe that safety net is there,
Speaker 3: but you still have then the burden of proof. So
Speaker 3: it's then not like I fell off the ladder and
Speaker 3: broke my leg and do you know what I mean
Speaker 3: on Wednesday and this is what happened, and my coworker
Speaker 3: called an ambulance and exposure like these and cancel cancers
Speaker 3: like these take a very long time you develop in
Speaker 3: your body, do you know what I mean? Like it's
Speaker 3: not like you were at an incident and then the
Speaker 3: next day you have a cancer, and you know, like
Speaker 3: they take such a long time to come out. So
Speaker 3: being able to track all your records and where you've
Speaker 3: been and you know we I mean, I'm guilty of it.
Speaker 3: You know, you just go to work and you do
Speaker 3: your thing. I don't necessarily track every thing I've got
Speaker 3: to do in the day, eat like that, and certainly
Speaker 3: with my you know, I wouldn't be looking at it going, oh,
Speaker 3: I must you know, I must make sure I write
Speaker 3: that down and where I've been and you know, and
Speaker 3: do all that in case I need it in ten
Speaker 3: years time, you know, because you're off doing your work,
Speaker 3: like there's an assumption that you are covered and looked after.
Speaker 3: But you know, it's a different I guess it's you know,
Speaker 3: it's it's a very different process to then have to
Speaker 3: track that amount of time and work to prove exposure
Speaker 3: as opposed to a single incident. Yeah that has happened.
Speaker 3: So it's I think, you know, for us, we're really
Speaker 3: we're really committed to raising the awareness and it has
Speaker 3: given us a purpose, if that makes any sense. Sometimes
Speaker 3: when I say it to go as then like we
Speaker 3: have no control over what is happening to us and
Speaker 3: what will happen. Simon will lose this battle, and he
Speaker 3: will lose it soon, you know, in weeks, maybe maybe
Speaker 3: a month or two, if we're lucky, but you know,
Speaker 3: he's very, very sick. But having something that we can
Speaker 3: focus on and a purpose for change is really really
Speaker 3: important for our family, and it's important for our healing journey,
Speaker 3: but most importantly, it's vital for the people that come
Speaker 3: after us. Like it won't make any difference for us,
Speaker 3: but I think I would can reconcile some of this
Speaker 3: in my heart when I and when this legislation is changed,
Speaker 3: when I know that you know, we've improved the safety
Speaker 3: net for workers after us, Can.
Speaker 2: I ask what it's like. I'm feel free not to
Speaker 2: answer any questions. I ask, really, but what's it like
Speaker 2: to sit in the middle and and process what you
Speaker 2: know you're in the middle of and when you know
Speaker 2: you don't even have the time to really process within
Speaker 2: the time that you've been given, Like it feels so
Speaker 2: enormous to me, I can't even wrap my mind around.
Speaker 3: Oh. Look, I when he was first diagnosed, I think
Speaker 3: I lost a month. I probably lost longer, but I
Speaker 3: was just constantly in this state of that. I'm gonna sorry, sorry,
Speaker 3: just dread. Why what does this look like? And I
Speaker 3: can't even now talk about how it was when we
Speaker 3: had to how difficult it was to tell the kids
Speaker 3: and that I have so many unknowns around. It was
Speaker 3: just it was the hardest thing we have ever had
Speaker 3: to do as a couple as parents, and just their
Speaker 3: physical reaction, Oh my god when we told so not
Speaker 3: just even the emotional but you know, just watching them
Speaker 3: just fall to the ground. So mostly I'm together, and
Speaker 3: mostly I'm not. But it's it's just a it's been
Speaker 3: a rollercoaster of really strong, heightened emotions and some times
Speaker 3: where you know, I know, for me, like sometimes I'm
Speaker 3: really focused on something, like when I focus on the
Speaker 3: legislation change, I can you know, it gives me something
Speaker 3: concrete to work on. It means my brain's not going,
Speaker 3: you know, in other places, and I can get out
Speaker 3: of bed. And then other days it just feels like
Speaker 3: I can't get out of bed and I'm not going
Speaker 3: to be able to function today. And They're closer, it
Speaker 3: gets to the end, and the sicker Simon's becoming, the
Speaker 3: harder it is to keep it all together because you
Speaker 3: know what's happening and what what's going to happen, and
Speaker 3: he's so young, you know, he's fifty six. It just
Speaker 3: seems like any couples out there and parents out there
Speaker 3: that are in their fifties and their kids are in
Speaker 3: their late teens and early twenties. You're kind of getting
Speaker 3: into your groove, you know, like the kids are really
Speaker 3: independent and they're finding their own way in life, and
Speaker 3: you know, we were starting to carve out time for
Speaker 3: ourselves in different ways, and you know, look at our
Speaker 3: careers differently, and you know, look at the future, you know,
Speaker 3: and all of that is gone, like and how we
Speaker 3: support our children through that has you know, has been
Speaker 3: our primary primary concern, alongside supporting Simon's health journey. So
Speaker 3: it's been a lot, and it's meant that I've had
Speaker 3: to you know, I've made decisions about I've taken some
Speaker 3: time off work and I'm reducing my workload, you know,
Speaker 3: so that i can do all the things that I
Speaker 3: need to do for my family, and part about time
Speaker 3: to ensure that I can work on having this legislation change,
Speaker 3: because for me, that is the real it's the only
Speaker 3: thing that will make any sense out of this whole, sorry,
Speaker 3: awful thing that we are experiencing, and that is life changing.
Speaker 3: Like we will lose I'll lose my life partner, the
Speaker 3: kids are going to lose their father and it's I
Speaker 3: don't know, you know, I always I've heard stories where
Speaker 3: people have lost significant family members and the impact that
Speaker 3: has had and the grieving process and how unfair it is.
Speaker 3: And you see it all the time in the news
Speaker 3: when people are just ripped out away from us, you know,
Speaker 3: in cruel, unimaginable ways, or they've been dealing with illnesses,
Speaker 3: you know, And I you always look at those situations
Speaker 3: with your heart open and you can't even imagine what
Speaker 3: it feels like to be there. And I guess that's
Speaker 3: the way I viewed it until it was until it's
Speaker 3: you and then one day, because one day it will
Speaker 3: be you. So trying to make any sense of it
Speaker 3: to us has been really about what we can change?
Speaker 3: Does that make sense?
Speaker 2: Like it does? I met you at in Gippsland.
Speaker 3: Right, yeah, So I had the girls with hammers with yeah, Karen, Yeah.
Speaker 2: And what I can't what And this is this is
Speaker 2: the reality of the stuff I talk about. And I
Speaker 2: feel like this is an example of an example, a
Speaker 2: made up example. This is a real life example of
Speaker 2: something I've said along a lot, which is like here
Speaker 2: we are in this room that Girls with Hammers a
Speaker 2: couple of years ago, and I remember being moved to
Speaker 2: tears hearing this the story from Kate Gail and her
Speaker 2: daughter and her turning up with that second bout of leukemia,
Speaker 2: and this gut wrenching story of you know, and you're
Speaker 2: in the audience, and I'm in the audience, and then
Speaker 2: now we're here, and it's like, we never know, like
Speaker 2: you said, we never know, it's never going to be us,
Speaker 2: and then it's us. And I often say to people,
Speaker 2: I say, we have these conversations and I host them
Speaker 2: and I listen, but I don't know what's happening in
Speaker 2: my life or my body. I don't know what tomorrow.
Speaker 2: I don't know if there's going to be an accident tomorrow.
Speaker 2: I don't know if there's something already in my world
Speaker 2: that I have not been aware of yet. And it's
Speaker 2: hard to fathom. And when you're faced with it, like
Speaker 2: I feel so sad and confronted by having that thought
Speaker 2: and this conversation right now.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel that because I have the same issue,
Speaker 3: like the same experience. When I'm at work. It's that
Speaker 3: I will hear and be a part of somebody's story
Speaker 3: for a very you know, for a short time, sometimes
Speaker 3: a longer time, and I walk beside them in that
Speaker 3: and I always, you know, just feel so strongly around
Speaker 3: what you know, they are experiencing. But I can never
Speaker 3: put myself in that same situation of how deeply painful
Speaker 3: it is. And you know, I mean, you know, and
Speaker 3: we can be quite well meaning, you know, to you know,
Speaker 3: in our support, but we'll never really understand what it's
Speaker 3: like until it is happening to you. And I think
Speaker 3: over the last few years, there's been a number of
Speaker 3: things that have happened in our lives sort of that
Speaker 3: has really made me realize how finite our time is.
Speaker 3: You know. A couple of years ago, my best friend
Speaker 3: was killed in a car accident, and it was like
Speaker 3: she was literally there one day and then gone the next,
Speaker 3: and I, you know, we didn't have, you know, those goodbyes,
Speaker 3: you didn't like she was just cruelly taken. And that
Speaker 3: took me such a long time to work through. And
Speaker 3: so when Simon was diagnosed, the one thing that we
Speaker 3: I guess hung on to at the time is that
Speaker 3: we we had time to say our goodbyes, We had
Speaker 3: time to do the things that we wanted to do
Speaker 3: with our family and prepare our family the best we
Speaker 3: can and I and that is just really around the practicalities,
Speaker 3: like there is no preparing for the waves of grief
Speaker 3: that will be the tsunami in our lives, but you
Speaker 3: know the practicalities of what we could do to we've
Speaker 3: done so in very much contrast to what happened to
Speaker 3: my friend where she was just ripped promise. So it
Speaker 3: has given us that time and that is something you know,
Speaker 3: both Simon and I are we're extremely grateful for because
Speaker 3: you don't know when it's going to be ripped from you.
Speaker 3: And he's certainly allowed him time to look at what
Speaker 3: he wants his legacy to be, which is part of
Speaker 3: this conversation today now where if he had a terrible
Speaker 3: accident and he was just taken from us, we wouldn't
Speaker 3: have ever been able to work through the things that
Speaker 3: we've been able to now or have the time that
Speaker 3: we have had. So we have been very clear that
Speaker 3: we don't have a lot of time and it's a
Speaker 3: finite piece for us, and we needed to do and
Speaker 3: be everything that we wanted to see in the next time.
Speaker 3: Twenty years it all happened to happen now, and we
Speaker 3: had to support our family and make sure our children
Speaker 3: had the wrap arounds that they're going to need. And
Speaker 3: so we have been able to do that, and we
Speaker 3: are really really grateful, but having the experience of both
Speaker 3: the other flip side of having time. And I'm not
Speaker 3: sure if this all makes sense to your listeners, and
Speaker 3: it may, and I've tried to unpack this a little bit.
Speaker 3: Is as much as we have loved time, we've also
Speaker 3: hated it because we know we don't like it's every
Speaker 3: day we are living on the edge, and that the
Speaker 3: neutral part. I was so grateful We've at least got time.
Speaker 3: You know, some people don't get time. We've at least
Speaker 3: got that. And people have said that to me and
Speaker 3: well meaning, but as I've got through that time's also
Speaker 3: our enemy and it is live trauma every day knowing
Speaker 3: that you get up and you don't know is today
Speaker 3: is today? When it changes, is today the end? You know?
Speaker 3: How much do I have to fit in today? And
Speaker 3: the trauma of that now has become a really big
Speaker 3: piece in our lives is that, you know, Simon hanging on,
Speaker 3: trying to hang on as long as he can. He
Speaker 3: wants to be here, and he is fighting and fighting,
Speaker 3: but the trauma of what that looks like on his body,
Speaker 3: on his health, on the family is also plays out
Speaker 3: and when it you know, and it will be abruptly
Speaker 3: taken from us. So time isn't our friend? Does that
Speaker 3: make I'm sort makes it perfect? Kind of like this,
Speaker 3: you know, we're grateful, but and we absolutely are, but
Speaker 3: there's this other side of it that is actually enemy
Speaker 3: at the same time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a it's a prison, it's a gift in
Speaker 2: a prison. And the reality is it's not just it's
Speaker 2: not just a ticking clock. It's a deteriorating clock where
Speaker 2: his quality of life goes down.
Speaker 3: His quality of life is going down as well. Yeah,
Speaker 3: that's exactly right.
Speaker 2: There'll be that confronting moment where you're like, at what
Speaker 2: point is like, it's it's just hard. I had an
Speaker 2: auntie that passed from leukemia and her last you know, weeks,
Speaker 2: months and weeks were really hard to watch, really hard.
Speaker 3: And then you're on this fine. You know, it's a
Speaker 3: roll of the dice because you you just don't know
Speaker 3: when that number is going to come up, that it's
Speaker 3: going to be today. You know, so that has been
Speaker 3: you know, it's a gift and an enemy. It's it's
Speaker 3: it's something that I've really struggled with, especially in the
Speaker 3: last couple of months, where like I have to actually
Speaker 3: turn my mind deliberately off from it because it keeps
Speaker 3: me up at night. You know, am I being ungreatful?
Speaker 3: I'm so glad we've got time, but I just this
Speaker 3: is I'm giving me high levels of anxiety and you know,
Speaker 3: I just know that I don't have time, and you know,
Speaker 3: you know, I can't explain it, but it just kind
Speaker 3: of sends my head a little bit crazy. And I
Speaker 3: just and I don't want to be ungrateful, and I
Speaker 3: want to be just living in the moment. And that's
Speaker 3: another thing. That's another thing, living in the moment. I
Speaker 3: you know, and well meaning good people and you know,
Speaker 3: and I think that and I have said that to
Speaker 3: people as well, but that is just the reality is
Speaker 3: when you're living with and.
Speaker 2: This moment is shit.
Speaker 3: It's shit.
Speaker 2: Like if I could live at any moment, it probably
Speaker 2: probably wouldn't be my way.
Speaker 3: You know. I'm just like, we're trying to live in
Speaker 3: the moment. But oh, you know, it's you know, he
Speaker 3: can be in agonizing pain and need lots of medication.
Speaker 3: And you know, the kids are really struggling watching him
Speaker 3: like this, and we're struggling to support these health needs
Speaker 3: and like it's not we're not on holidays in Fiji,
Speaker 3: like it's you know, so there's I think there's different
Speaker 3: living in the moments, if that makes sense.
Speaker 2: So, and I'm sure it's awkward. People don't know what.
Speaker 3: To say, yeah, and I I can actually appreciate that,
Speaker 3: and I keep I've certainly had people say to me
Speaker 3: they just they don't know what to say or what
Speaker 3: to do. And the reality is there's nothing that anyone
Speaker 3: can do, but there's some practicalities people can support with
Speaker 3: when they want. So I've like we've been really fortunate.
Speaker 3: And I'll just give a shout out to the local
Speaker 3: CFA crew that have been absolutely have just jumped in
Speaker 3: and they're dropping off meals. I had surgery the other week.
Speaker 3: Simon's in hospital. I've got no one to drive me.
Speaker 3: Someone drives me to Queue all the way from Gippsland
Speaker 3: for the surgery. Someone from Trades and Labor picked me up.
Speaker 3: You know, people have just been making sure we get
Speaker 3: to those things and that We've got everything that we
Speaker 3: need around us. So those practicalities are really important. And
Speaker 3: when people jump in like they have for us, you know,
Speaker 3: it just means it was really hard for me At
Speaker 3: first to say I need help like that was huge.
Speaker 3: I was like, I can't even say that, no, no, no,
Speaker 3: because my role is to help others and you know,
Speaker 3: so it was really difficult. And then I've got some
Speaker 3: conversations and people had reached out, and I thought I
Speaker 3: have to and I know from my role at the
Speaker 3: neighbood house one of the really important things you can
Speaker 3: give people when they're trying to support somebody in crisis
Speaker 3: is a job. Like when they offer and you say,
Speaker 3: now I'm more good, which as you go to nobody
Speaker 3: wants to burden anybody else. It's not that they start
Speaker 3: to stop offering, but they start to not know how
Speaker 3: to you know what I mean, There's no direction. So
Speaker 3: I kept coming back to my work role, going I
Speaker 3: have to I have to put some words around it.
Speaker 3: So and I couldn't cook. I've still got some injury.
Speaker 3: I'll be six weeks before I can do anything useful,
Speaker 3: and so I just said, I, you know, we can
Speaker 3: get some meals and honestly, my freezers are full. People
Speaker 3: are dropping things off, people are buying stuff from a pantry.
Speaker 3: I'm not sure I'll need to shop again for a while.
Speaker 3: But those practical things just started to come. And so
Speaker 3: instead of people talking to me and ringing me saying
Speaker 3: I don't know what to say, they've actually stopped and
Speaker 3: they're focused on you know. You know, we've got another
Speaker 3: delivery of food, We've picked up some toilet paper. You know,
Speaker 3: do you need help walking the dog? You know, I've
Speaker 3: got a seventeen year old. I've got you know, one
Speaker 3: hundred and twenty hours to do for driving lessons. You know,
Speaker 3: there's some offers around that, like we can help with
Speaker 3: the driving lessons. You know, we haven't sort of moved
Speaker 3: into that yet because we've been you know, there's been
Speaker 3: a lot on, but lots of practical support and help
Speaker 3: has started to come. When I lifted that, you know that,
Speaker 3: I guess that up and you know, put words around
Speaker 3: we do need some help, So they weren't then in
Speaker 3: that awkward I'm not sure what to say or do,
Speaker 3: And that has been really freeing for me because when
Speaker 3: people say to me, I don't know what to say,
Speaker 3: I almost cry because I don't know what to say
Speaker 3: like and it puts me, it puts pressure on me.
Speaker 3: Where now it's really just it's about the practicalities of support.
Speaker 3: So I would say to anyone that is going through this,
Speaker 3: but it is I know it's extreme difficult. But if
Speaker 3: you can put some words around that too, you know
Speaker 3: a few key people in your life, they will do
Speaker 3: the rest. They you know, they will come in with
Speaker 3: the supports that are needed and help you get through
Speaker 3: that really tough time, and those practicality is will just
Speaker 3: it's just taken that burden of those awkward conversations away,
Speaker 3: but it's also allowed people to come in and support
Speaker 3: us when we when we need it the most.
Speaker 2: How do you find the with your kids? The age
Speaker 2: they are, so they're children, but their independent children, they're they're.
Speaker 3: They're young adults.
Speaker 2: So the role of being the mum and the protector,
Speaker 2: but also the role of you're you're suffering a significant
Speaker 2: loss as as an independent woman as well, So how
Speaker 2: are you navigating that, what that looks like? Who do
Speaker 2: you need to be.
Speaker 3: So you that That's something that has been quite fluid
Speaker 3: for me. One of the things that we decided early
Speaker 3: in the piece is to as difficult as it was,
Speaker 3: we needed to be very clear and honest with the
Speaker 3: kids about everything that was happening. So I don't, you know,
Speaker 3: think there's any point trying to protect them and just
Speaker 3: causing issues later because they're adults, you know, they're you know,
Speaker 3: they've got high emotional and intelligence. It's their father. There's
Speaker 3: no point pretending it's not hurting me or I'll be okay,
Speaker 3: so because they know I'm not, and it's just and
Speaker 3: it also I didn't want to model something that wasn't
Speaker 3: sustainable as well, like it you shouldn't talk about your feelings,
Speaker 3: because you absolutely should. So we've tried to be open
Speaker 3: and honest with them, but sometimes we'll be talking and
Speaker 3: I'll just break down and you know, and it's it
Speaker 3: really difficult, I know, for them to see me up
Speaker 3: set like that. But the reality is that I can't
Speaker 3: be everything to everyone all the time, and I don't want,
Speaker 3: especially my girls, I don't want them to think that
Speaker 3: that's how they have to live and be because sometimes
Speaker 3: you're just not okay and you can't be the mum
Speaker 3: in that way. You're just emotionally just not able to
Speaker 3: be there, and so I've tried to make sure that
Speaker 3: if I am upset that they you know, I'm not
Speaker 3: hiding that from them, and I'm talking through with them
Speaker 3: what is going on, and you know what our future
Speaker 3: looks like. There's lots of questions about you know, what
Speaker 3: does it look like? Is it okay to talk about
Speaker 3: a future without dad? And you know, you know, unpacking
Speaker 3: I can't explain it trying to unpack those things that
Speaker 3: it is okay, you know. And so for example, my
Speaker 3: seventeen year old earlier in the PA was worried we
Speaker 3: might have to move house or you know, will we
Speaker 3: have to move or do we have to sell the house?
Speaker 3: Are we going to stay here? So we had those conversations,
Speaker 3: if we know this is our home, we're staying here,
Speaker 3: will anchor here? You know, we're not going to move,
Speaker 3: you know, we'll stay here. You'll do year eleven and twelve,
Speaker 3: and we're going to get you through that and it
Speaker 3: might look a bit different for you than the other kids,
Speaker 3: but we're going to lean on all the supports we
Speaker 3: can to get you to the atar you need because
Speaker 3: this is a period in time and it's really awful
Speaker 3: and it's life changing, but you will have a life
Speaker 3: after this. You've got to be working towards that. Your
Speaker 3: father and I don't want you to give up. We
Speaker 3: don't want you to.
Speaker 1: Not be.
Speaker 3: Living your best life in the future. So we will
Speaker 3: work through this now. So being able to have those
Speaker 3: conversations where they can talk to me and about their
Speaker 3: fears rational or not, and we can through those and say,
Speaker 3: you know, like, no, we're not going to be moving.
Speaker 3: If that's you know, that's a concern for you, I
Speaker 3: can tell you now, you know we're not. We'll stay here,
Speaker 3: like this will be the base. So that's just an
Speaker 3: example of one of the I guess many really you know,
Speaker 3: tough conversations that I never thought i'd have to have
Speaker 3: with my kids, and especially as young adults you know,
Speaker 3: about to go into the world themselves. But I've just
Speaker 3: had to be prepared to have them and and be vulnerable.
Speaker 3: And that is, you know, for for a lot of people,
Speaker 3: and as for parents, it's really challenging to be that
Speaker 3: vulnerable with your your children and and you know, share
Speaker 3: those deepest, you know, thoughts and feelings that you're having
Speaker 3: and that you know, that uncertainty of you know, what's
Speaker 3: in front of you, and this many times where I
Speaker 3: just don't know the answers and I'm like, I don't
Speaker 3: know what it looks like like I you know, I
Speaker 3: have to be honest about that. I don't know what
Speaker 3: happens next, but I can tell you the practicalities around
Speaker 3: these things. Or but you know, I don't know what
Speaker 3: the grief is going to look like for us and
Speaker 3: how we're going to navigate our life without Simon. And
Speaker 3: he's in our lives, he's larger than life in our lives.
Speaker 3: He's larger than life in many people's lives. So yeah,
Speaker 3: I just I don't know that I've got good answer
Speaker 3: for that, but just just do what you can, Like
Speaker 3: I don't know, I'm just like the best you can
Speaker 3: because sometimes you just can't do anything.
Speaker 2: I think you've got a like a really good handle
Speaker 2: on that part of things, because that was I don't
Speaker 2: know what I expected. I guess when I get this
Speaker 2: sense of how for other people you are the You're
Speaker 2: the person that cares for other people, You're the person
Speaker 2: that gets it done. So I felt like in the
Speaker 2: middle of this incredibly intense tsunami as you described it,
Speaker 2: of emotion trying to make decisions or have any clarity
Speaker 2: about that would be a mess. But you've, like you
Speaker 2: sound like you're finding as good a way as you can.
Speaker 3: That's that's what we're doing, Just trying. For me, it's
Speaker 3: just trying to deal with each day and each thing
Speaker 3: that comes in, but just having some reality around. And
Speaker 3: I think that it's really important for me that I'm
Speaker 3: pecking in because sometimes I'm really not sure I'm in
Speaker 3: the right space to be making decisions. And so I've
Speaker 3: got a few key people that all ticking with as well,
Speaker 3: like you just got I think there's like I'm really
Speaker 3: feeling really crazy today and I'm just not sure what
Speaker 3: to do on you know, and they'll remind me to
Speaker 3: take some time, you know, when I feel like I
Speaker 3: can't take the time. No, you don't have to make
Speaker 3: that decision now, or yes, I do, you know. But
Speaker 3: sometimes being able to check in with people because you know,
Speaker 3: emotionally you just can't regulate in the same way. It's
Speaker 3: really important to have a couple of key people to
Speaker 3: be able to do that with. And I feel like
Speaker 3: I've you know, I've leaned into that a lot as well,
Speaker 3: and just making sure I've got the supports, you know,
Speaker 3: you know, last year, I sort of reached out and
Speaker 3: made sure that I had I've never seen a psychologist before,
Speaker 3: probably should have long before now, but never have. But
Speaker 3: I knew as we're you know, we were tapping the
Speaker 3: kids in and making sure that with those wraparounds were
Speaker 3: well in place, because it can take such a long
Speaker 3: time to get those wraparounds for your young people or
Speaker 3: anyone service light times hideously long. So I wanted to
Speaker 3: make sure everybody was tapped in earlier. And once I
Speaker 3: got all, you know, the kids all sorted and you know,
Speaker 3: Simon's therapy and health needs were sort of in playing,
Speaker 3: we had some structure around that. The very next thing
Speaker 3: I did was make a call and book by myself
Speaker 3: as psychologists to make sure that I had somebody outside
Speaker 3: of my immediate friend group, because see, you know, and
Speaker 3: I guess that sort of that mental kind of group,
Speaker 3: the people that you lean into that was completely independent
Speaker 3: to that, so that you know, there was somebody else
Speaker 3: I could check in with as well and maybe say
Speaker 3: the things that I can't always say when you know
Speaker 3: you're in your roles and you're trying to support other
Speaker 3: people and you're also navigating this incredible life changing experience
Speaker 3: while you're supporting your life partner and their health needs,
Speaker 3: you know, and the needs are just so intense. You know,
Speaker 3: there's so much medication. You know, there's lots of supports,
Speaker 3: there's lots of good days, there's an incredible amount of
Speaker 3: bad days with pain they can't you know, huge sense
Speaker 3: an overwhelming sense of helplessness across all of those things.
Speaker 3: So being able to check in with somebody that's independent
Speaker 3: and that you know has the skills and the professional
Speaker 3: support for you is really important as well. So I
Speaker 3: and again, that is a gift that time gave us.
Speaker 3: It allowed us to be able to get all those
Speaker 3: things in place. So yeah, so I guess you know
Speaker 3: it sort of again speaks to why I'm torn sometimes
Speaker 3: now about time is a gift, but it's also it's
Speaker 3: also not so so it gave us the opportunity to
Speaker 3: really unbat Simon and I by nature, and we're very
Speaker 3: extra only practical boy scout type material. Were your people
Speaker 3: in this in a time of emergency. We've got the list,
Speaker 3: we'll get it all sorted. We do very different roles,
Speaker 3: but you know, we kind of dive head on into
Speaker 3: those things and that's where we shine. So when it
Speaker 3: was then us, that was you know, not only confronting
Speaker 3: and heartbreaking. We had to really I can remember one
Speaker 3: night we sat and we had a bottle of wine
Speaker 3: and just started to really look at what are the
Speaker 3: what are the practicalities, what are the what are the
Speaker 3: things that we can control here? And immediately it was
Speaker 3: things like rewriting our wheels. You know, we hadn't done
Speaker 3: that since the kids were small, you know, those set
Speaker 3: and forget things like, you know, checking on your super.
Speaker 3: I'm only saying this because this is all stuff I've
Speaker 3: learned along the way. And when we checked the super,
Speaker 3: you know all those years ago, we put each other's
Speaker 3: names down, but of course that expires in every three years.
Speaker 3: I didn't know that. So I've learned lots. So we started, yeah,
Speaker 3: check check that you're binding nomination. I think it is.
Speaker 3: I'm not quite sure what the wording is, but it
Speaker 3: needs to be done every three years otherwise it you know,
Speaker 3: just falls into your estate and then if you don't
Speaker 3: have a will, then it goes into probate. So we
Speaker 3: started to make a list. We made a list of
Speaker 3: what are the practicalities here? These are the things that
Speaker 3: we can control, and they were sort of the practicalities.
Speaker 3: We know, book make sure the kids have got therapists.
Speaker 3: Now we need to tap them in. How to you know,
Speaker 3: speak to the schools. Have we done our wills? We
Speaker 3: really did those, checked our soupers, you know, life insurance,
Speaker 3: checking on those. The gift of time, you know, we
Speaker 3: could do the practicalities and that has sort of kind
Speaker 3: of helped us support the kids through all of this
Speaker 3: as well, and kind of it's kind of kept me
Speaker 3: a little bit focused because I can come back to things,
Speaker 3: if that makes sense, and go all right, now we've
Speaker 3: checked on that. You know, I don't feel like it's
Speaker 3: completely out of control because the things I can work
Speaker 3: on I've you know, we've done and that that's meant
Speaker 3: now that we you know, we have this time, but
Speaker 3: we can just concentrate on that and we can work
Speaker 3: on the pieces around the legislation and we you know,
Speaker 3: like I'm not. Time gave us the gift of sorting
Speaker 3: out those practicalities, and it has been it did give
Speaker 3: us a bit of a sense of control back as well,
Speaker 3: which I did say, sorry.
Speaker 2: Yeah no, but yeah, it's good to like that's it's incredible.
Speaker 2: So how can I will have a link to the
Speaker 2: petition to get another setting that you has changed that legislation.
Speaker 2: Is there anything else that myself and the listeners of
Speaker 2: the show can do?
Speaker 3: So what there is? So sign the petition, friends and family,
Speaker 3: encourage them to sign it. Become informed, find out about
Speaker 3: presumptive legislation and who is missing in the gaps, because
Speaker 3: chances are you will have a friend or a family
Speaker 3: member that is in the gap. And we know that
Speaker 3: we know.
Speaker 4: These, you know, really dreadful experiences that we have through
Speaker 4: fire and emergencies are becoming longer and more intense, and
Speaker 4: I think we, you know, we as a collective need
Speaker 4: to understand who needs our support because more broadly, and
Speaker 4: I'm only speaking about CFA staff today because that's where
Speaker 4: my links are, but you know, there's a lot of emergency.
Speaker 3: Responders that probably won't be covered. I you know, can
Speaker 3: focus on certain things, but you know, raise awareness, speak
Speaker 3: to your local member of parliament. You know, I know
Speaker 3: I'm quite politically active and quiet. You know, I have
Speaker 3: an advocate voice and I use that quite a lot
Speaker 3: in my roles and I know for some people it
Speaker 3: can be really difficult to reach out to your members
Speaker 3: of parliament around issues that matter and how to frame
Speaker 3: that and what to do. But these are people too,
Speaker 3: and honestly reaching out to them and just you know,
Speaker 3: trying to make a time to have that discussion or
Speaker 3: send an email about it, it puts it on their agenda.
Speaker 3: You know, you get enough emails about something or enough
Speaker 3: phone calls, you know, one or two, you might go, oh, no,
Speaker 3: that was a thing. You get twenty you go, there's
Speaker 3: a real thing around that. I need to become informed.
Speaker 3: And that's your way of helping them become informed about
Speaker 3: the amendments that are required. That's how legislation is changed,
Speaker 3: that's how it's moved. That's how we get the society
Speaker 3: that we have today. Is when issues of importance matter
Speaker 3: to our community, we can make that change. We can
Speaker 3: actually navigate that pathway to ensure that people are included
Speaker 3: that should be included in this legislation. We have to
Speaker 3: be informed to know that there's a gap and what
Speaker 3: the gaps are, and we have the power through our
Speaker 3: voice to actually raise the awareness and speak to our
Speaker 3: local members of parliament about it and encourage them to
Speaker 3: become advocates surrounded as well. They're might take homes. You
Speaker 3: can do anyone can do that.
Speaker 2: You will said like that, you're good at this, You're
Speaker 2: good at that informing.
Speaker 3: Just like I'm really passionate about it. And now you know,
Speaker 3: I've got a host of issues along the way that
Speaker 3: I've championed. I've worked on it, and we've bought change.
Speaker 3: And it might be a change, just a small change
Speaker 3: in our patch, and it could be a bigger change
Speaker 3: and a bigger platform of influence. But the important thing
Speaker 3: is to understand is as everyday people, we do have
Speaker 3: influence and becoming informed about something and it doesn't even
Speaker 3: just have to be about this, but you know, by nature,
Speaker 3: when we become informed and we know there's you know,
Speaker 3: we recognize there could be a better option here, or
Speaker 3: a better way forward, or a more inclusive way, then
Speaker 3: you know, we want that for our community. We want
Speaker 3: that for our neighbors and our family and our friends
Speaker 3: and our broader society. And I just think as a collective,
Speaker 3: the more we focus on improvements that we can make,
Speaker 3: how we collectively do that, how we respectfully do that,
Speaker 3: Because there's always going to be a difference of opinion
Speaker 3: and agenda and that's okay because that you know, those
Speaker 3: diversified voices is really important that but that makes up
Speaker 3: the fabric of community. But at the end of the day,
Speaker 3: it's a focus on the shared goal. I think that
Speaker 3: gets us over the line. So, you know, having being
Speaker 3: able to influence using your voice, coming informed means that
Speaker 3: eventually you will be on that shared goal with somebody
Speaker 3: and we you know, no one' you carry it alone.
Speaker 3: We can't actually do it alone. We need to do
Speaker 3: it as a collective. So this is super important to me.
Speaker 3: Now I almost feel ashamed that I wasn't aware of
Speaker 3: it in the context that I am now, you know,
Speaker 3: three years ago I just wasn't and that's about life
Speaker 3: experience and what comes your way and what doesn't as well.
Speaker 3: But now that I am, I'm extremely committed to getting
Speaker 3: this change. So I'm so grateful to Tiffany for reaching
Speaker 3: out and allowing me to have this conversation with you.
Speaker 3: And I would really encourage your readers to sorry your
Speaker 3: listeners to actually find out more, become informed and advocate
Speaker 3: to their local MP.
Speaker 2: Thank you so much. Thank you for being brave and
Speaker 2: vulnerable and real and I'm understanding you all the love
Speaker 2: and whatever you need over the coming weeks, months and
Speaker 2: what's ahead.
Speaker 3: Thank you, and I'd love to be able to touch
Speaker 3: base with you again, hopefully to tell you that it's changed.
Speaker 2: Yes, so I just got toose bumps. I'm like, let's
Speaker 2: make okay, listeners, Let's make sure that I get that
Speaker 2: all real.
Speaker 3: Yeah. I hope so so.
Speaker 2: But thank you so much, Thanks Tracy, Thanks everyone.
Speaker 1: She said, it's now never. I got fighting in my blood.