1 00:00:02,240 --> 00:00:04,320 Speaker 1: Hello, Thank you so much for downloading the show. This 2 00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:07,800 Speaker 1: is Better than Yesterday. Useful tools and useful conversations to 3 00:00:07,840 --> 00:00:12,239 Speaker 1: make your day today better than yesterday every week since 4 00:00:12,240 --> 00:00:14,400 Speaker 1: twenty thirteen. I'm glad you're here. My name is Osha Ginsberg. 5 00:00:14,960 --> 00:00:16,840 Speaker 1: If you're listening to this show on the twenty third 6 00:00:16,880 --> 00:00:20,520 Speaker 1: of June and twenty twenty five, then this is the day. 7 00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:24,400 Speaker 1: This is the day. This is the day after I 8 00:00:24,560 --> 00:00:27,000 Speaker 1: danced on Dancing with the Stars. After I danced on 9 00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:29,400 Speaker 1: Dancing with the Stars. If you know that tune, I'm 10 00:00:29,440 --> 00:00:31,720 Speaker 1: sorry for you. It was bad for me too. It 11 00:00:31,760 --> 00:00:34,600 Speaker 1: was bad for me too. Now, if you haven't seen 12 00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:39,000 Speaker 1: that episode last night, there are some spoilers today. So 13 00:00:39,479 --> 00:00:41,280 Speaker 1: because I am going to talk to you a little 14 00:00:41,280 --> 00:00:44,919 Speaker 1: bit about that, because I learned a lot saying yes 15 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,600 Speaker 1: to this show. I learned a lot about ego, a 16 00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:52,160 Speaker 1: lot about external validation, and I learned a lot about humility. Yeah, 17 00:00:52,159 --> 00:00:54,320 Speaker 1: there's a lot going on. I'll get to it after 18 00:00:54,360 --> 00:01:04,920 Speaker 1: the break. Hey, thanks for being here. Before I get 19 00:01:04,959 --> 00:01:06,640 Speaker 1: into the dancing stuff, I did want to remind you 20 00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:10,000 Speaker 1: that the story Club substack is powering along. I finally 21 00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:11,920 Speaker 1: figured out a system to get the full stories up there. 22 00:01:11,959 --> 00:01:15,839 Speaker 1: Subscribers get to watch full stories. Hannah Riiley's show Story 23 00:01:15,920 --> 00:01:19,520 Speaker 1: just went up recently and it's fun, fantast Dick. If 24 00:01:19,560 --> 00:01:21,040 Speaker 1: you want to come to the next Story Club show, 25 00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:22,600 Speaker 1: it is on the sixth of the Julian and Merrickfield 26 00:01:22,640 --> 00:01:24,280 Speaker 1: links in the show notes that it is also where 27 00:01:24,319 --> 00:01:26,600 Speaker 1: you can pre order my new books. So what now 28 00:01:26,680 --> 00:01:29,000 Speaker 1: what which you'll hear me talk about a bit today, 29 00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:31,440 Speaker 1: But it would really be very, very wonderful if you 30 00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:34,640 Speaker 1: could do so. And if you do, screenshot me you 31 00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:36,720 Speaker 1: know when you buy it, and I'll send you something 32 00:01:36,720 --> 00:01:40,000 Speaker 1: to say thank you. Sandosh your email at gmail dot com. 33 00:01:40,160 --> 00:01:43,520 Speaker 1: Just shoot that there. A couple of months ago, I think, 34 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:44,800 Speaker 1: you know, towards the end of last year, I've got 35 00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:47,800 Speaker 1: a phone call from someone I worked with quite a 36 00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:50,160 Speaker 1: long time ago, but now they have a job casting 37 00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:52,320 Speaker 1: reality TV shows. They do a very good job at it, 38 00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:54,120 Speaker 1: and they caught me and said, hey, do you want 39 00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:57,680 Speaker 1: to do Dancing with the Starts? Now? If you don't 40 00:01:57,680 --> 00:02:00,840 Speaker 1: know some of the background here, I've had three hip 41 00:02:00,880 --> 00:02:03,600 Speaker 1: replacement surgeries. I've only got two hips. There's a lot 42 00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:06,200 Speaker 1: of shit going on in my right hip at the time. 43 00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:08,600 Speaker 1: When I took the phone call. My mobility is pretty fucked. 44 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:10,640 Speaker 1: It's okay, I can walk from here to there, but 45 00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:12,720 Speaker 1: I live with about a two or three out of 46 00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:15,480 Speaker 1: ten level of pain on most days. That's just what 47 00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:18,760 Speaker 1: life is, and that's okay. I'm fine with that. But 48 00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,960 Speaker 1: when it comes to the amount of you know, precision 49 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:26,679 Speaker 1: and rotational control over my right leg, there's no physical 50 00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:31,680 Speaker 1: way I could actually dance in a way that is 51 00:02:31,720 --> 00:02:34,480 Speaker 1: required on this TV show when they made that phone call. 52 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:38,200 Speaker 1: Is not impossible, no way. I could barely walk straight. 53 00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:42,240 Speaker 1: So I said, yeah, absolutely, let me first check with 54 00:02:42,280 --> 00:02:46,480 Speaker 1: my wife. If you don't know this, it's very important, ACBD. 55 00:02:46,760 --> 00:02:51,320 Speaker 1: It's a great band. Always consult before deciding, ACBD. So 56 00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:53,359 Speaker 1: when Audi got back from work that day, we had 57 00:02:53,360 --> 00:02:56,800 Speaker 1: a chat and she said, fantastic because it's a lot 58 00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:58,720 Speaker 1: of commitment from her as well, like I'm gonna be 59 00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:01,280 Speaker 1: training every day sick, seven days a week for weeks 60 00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:04,119 Speaker 1: and then begone shooting until late at night, and you're 61 00:03:04,200 --> 00:03:07,320 Speaker 1: here over summer holidays with our son. So it was 62 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:10,280 Speaker 1: a big commitment from her as well, and she said, 63 00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:12,280 Speaker 1: absolutely should do it. So I call this person back 64 00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:15,280 Speaker 1: and said, I'm in I've known people who've done this 65 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:16,880 Speaker 1: sho before and they all say it's the best thing 66 00:03:16,919 --> 00:03:19,000 Speaker 1: you'll ever do, hardest thing you'll ever do. So I 67 00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:20,720 Speaker 1: had a feeling these idea what was in the running 68 00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:22,680 Speaker 1: for that it was going to be a pretty massive challenge. 69 00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:27,119 Speaker 1: And that's okay because it's I believe it's incredibly important 70 00:03:27,120 --> 00:03:30,200 Speaker 1: that as we get older we do things that are hard. 71 00:03:31,240 --> 00:03:33,040 Speaker 1: It's important to do things that are hard anyway, but 72 00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:36,560 Speaker 1: as we get older, particularly, it's important to put deliberately 73 00:03:36,600 --> 00:03:39,040 Speaker 1: put yourself in a position where are stripped of confidence 74 00:03:39,160 --> 00:03:42,200 Speaker 1: and stripped of the power that you normally feel in 75 00:03:42,200 --> 00:03:44,960 Speaker 1: the situation. In the words of the man who guides 76 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:47,880 Speaker 1: me on my sobriety adventures, it's important to find humility 77 00:03:47,880 --> 00:03:50,760 Speaker 1: before humility finds you. Because as we grow up, as 78 00:03:50,800 --> 00:03:52,600 Speaker 1: we get older, we tend to stick to things that 79 00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:54,840 Speaker 1: are familiar to us, things where we feel in control, 80 00:03:54,920 --> 00:03:57,320 Speaker 1: things where we feel safe. But what that means is 81 00:03:57,360 --> 00:04:00,720 Speaker 1: the world moves on. Our world just ends upting smaller 82 00:04:00,760 --> 00:04:03,120 Speaker 1: and smaller and smaller. Our ability to deal with things 83 00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:06,680 Speaker 1: that are new and different, where we don't have a 84 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:08,800 Speaker 1: heap of control or we don't have a lot of familiarity, 85 00:04:08,840 --> 00:04:11,400 Speaker 1: these things just start to get more and more difficult 86 00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:13,880 Speaker 1: to deal with, and eventually, you know, we end up 87 00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:17,000 Speaker 1: living kind of a what's TikTok mart. You know, we 88 00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:19,720 Speaker 1: can get that that's trope exists for a reason, and 89 00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:21,920 Speaker 1: that can lead us to have some pretty strange ideas 90 00:04:21,960 --> 00:04:24,440 Speaker 1: about things are unfamiliar with and unfortunately lead us open 91 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:27,719 Speaker 1: to manipulation, particularly when it comes to groups of people. 92 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:30,160 Speaker 1: Sometimes they're politicians. Sometimes they're not saying, oh, look, the 93 00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:32,640 Speaker 1: reason you feel scared is because those people over there, 94 00:04:33,480 --> 00:04:36,880 Speaker 1: and you know where it goes from that. Not long 95 00:04:36,920 --> 00:04:39,040 Speaker 1: after I've got sober, I was living in America at 96 00:04:39,040 --> 00:04:42,320 Speaker 1: the time. I've always enjoyed being in the mountains, being 97 00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:44,760 Speaker 1: in the snow. Not long after I've got sober, I 98 00:04:44,880 --> 00:04:47,200 Speaker 1: was on a weekend in Colorado visiting a friend, and 99 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:50,320 Speaker 1: I just decided to go skiing that day. This is 100 00:04:50,360 --> 00:04:53,080 Speaker 1: after a good twelve years of really dedicating myself to 101 00:04:53,120 --> 00:04:55,400 Speaker 1: being the best snowboarder I could possibly be shy of 102 00:04:55,480 --> 00:04:57,400 Speaker 1: hitting a half pipe or going over the eighty footer. 103 00:04:58,279 --> 00:05:00,000 Speaker 1: I was really proud of how well I could snow, 104 00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:02,360 Speaker 1: but sometimes it was getting to the point where I 105 00:05:02,360 --> 00:05:04,840 Speaker 1: wouldn't feel very challenged. I'd sometimes I'd go down the 106 00:05:04,839 --> 00:05:07,360 Speaker 1: mountain backwards with one foot out of my bindings. The 107 00:05:07,360 --> 00:05:09,320 Speaker 1: snowboarding had been amazing to me, taking me all over 108 00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:12,440 Speaker 1: the world, connected me with brilliant people, made incredible memories 109 00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:15,880 Speaker 1: with family and friends. I'd hike through distant peaks and 110 00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:18,559 Speaker 1: dropped into powder as deep as my hip, jumped off cliffs, 111 00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:22,719 Speaker 1: all kinds of wild shit broke a hand. So why 112 00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:25,360 Speaker 1: would I deliberately choose to go back to skiing, which 113 00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:26,880 Speaker 1: is something I hadn't done since I was nineteen, and 114 00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:29,600 Speaker 1: even they're not very well Like I said, because as 115 00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:32,240 Speaker 1: an adult, it's important to find humility before it finds you. 116 00:05:32,279 --> 00:05:34,320 Speaker 1: And trust me, that first day of skiing, it was 117 00:05:34,720 --> 00:05:40,560 Speaker 1: infuriating what that did for me. Really, it helped me 118 00:05:41,480 --> 00:05:44,680 Speaker 1: learn at that late stage in my life when I 119 00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:50,360 Speaker 1: fall over, no one actually cares nobody. That really helped 120 00:05:50,360 --> 00:05:53,160 Speaker 1: me work on this kind of real, weird, internalized embarrassment 121 00:05:53,160 --> 00:05:55,960 Speaker 1: and shame that I'd had around that I fell. I've 122 00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:57,679 Speaker 1: in front of the lift lines of hundreds of people, 123 00:05:58,240 --> 00:06:01,040 Speaker 1: no one gave a shit at all. I've got a 124 00:06:01,120 --> 00:06:03,560 Speaker 1: light out of deliberately choosing that humble path of investing 125 00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:06,280 Speaker 1: time and let's be honest, money into going to the mountain, 126 00:06:06,279 --> 00:06:07,520 Speaker 1: all the way to the mountains, just so I could 127 00:06:07,560 --> 00:06:11,880 Speaker 1: have a really frustrating day in the blizzardy, freezing, icing snow, 128 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:16,080 Speaker 1: with snowwelled down my back and all it. But being 129 00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:18,320 Speaker 1: willing to do that again and again and again. Not 130 00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:20,919 Speaker 1: only did I eventually become a very good skier, but 131 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:25,800 Speaker 1: I also became pretty good at being okay with not 132 00:06:25,839 --> 00:06:29,280 Speaker 1: being very good at things. A couple months back, Danny 133 00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:32,039 Speaker 1: Mano came on the podcast and she has this great line, 134 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:36,039 Speaker 1: failure is what learning looks like. But to be honest 135 00:06:36,080 --> 00:06:38,800 Speaker 1: with you, even though work has shifted a lot for 136 00:06:38,880 --> 00:06:41,240 Speaker 1: me in the last couple of years, I hadn't deliberately 137 00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:45,640 Speaker 1: sought out humility. Right, There's a lot of humility has 138 00:06:45,680 --> 00:06:48,120 Speaker 1: come to visit me since then, but I haven't deliberately 139 00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:49,640 Speaker 1: sought it out. I was dealing with a lot of it. 140 00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:52,480 Speaker 1: So when this GID came up, it was like boom, Yes, 141 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:55,719 Speaker 1: I'm in. It's important to understand that recovery from any 142 00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:58,640 Speaker 1: kind of surgery or injury is difficult, particularly what it 143 00:06:58,680 --> 00:07:01,880 Speaker 1: evolves a limb more mobility kind of thing, whether it's 144 00:07:01,920 --> 00:07:03,760 Speaker 1: on your arm or your shoulder or your leg or whatever. 145 00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:07,280 Speaker 1: Because and we just explored this in the documentary that 146 00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:10,760 Speaker 1: I did about chronic and resistant pain, you can get 147 00:07:10,760 --> 00:07:13,160 Speaker 1: caught in a loop where, oh, it hurts if I 148 00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:16,160 Speaker 1: moved this way, so I know, I'll just stop moving 149 00:07:16,240 --> 00:07:19,679 Speaker 1: this way. Hopefully then it won't hurt. But what happens 150 00:07:19,760 --> 00:07:22,200 Speaker 1: is that the less you move, the more it hurts, 151 00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:25,400 Speaker 1: and eventually you stop moving all together and it just 152 00:07:25,480 --> 00:07:30,520 Speaker 1: hurts heaps. It is inconcruent, but you have to be 153 00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:33,000 Speaker 1: willing to be with the discomfort of that movement to 154 00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:36,120 Speaker 1: train your body. It's okay to move this way again. 155 00:07:36,240 --> 00:07:38,920 Speaker 1: It's safe to move in this path. This plane of 156 00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:42,160 Speaker 1: motion is safe. I can hold a load in my 157 00:07:42,320 --> 00:07:45,040 Speaker 1: arm or my leg moving like this, it is okay. 158 00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:47,680 Speaker 1: And eventually your body lets go of that pain response 159 00:07:47,720 --> 00:07:51,320 Speaker 1: and you can start to move more properly. Again. I've 160 00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:53,720 Speaker 1: done that a bit through rehab, but nothing like this. 161 00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:58,680 Speaker 1: The first couple of weeks of training were incredibly difficult. Srianni, 162 00:07:58,760 --> 00:08:02,280 Speaker 1: who is my dad's teach. Ballroom is really strict. You've 163 00:08:02,280 --> 00:08:03,840 Speaker 1: got to hold your body in a particular way, You've 164 00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:05,760 Speaker 1: got to walk in a particular way. It's really, really 165 00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:10,360 Speaker 1: really strict, a strictly ballroom, if you will I she said, okay, 166 00:08:10,360 --> 00:08:12,120 Speaker 1: that's really good. Asha. Can you just make sure both 167 00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:15,960 Speaker 1: of your feet are pointing forwards? Well they are, No, 168 00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:17,960 Speaker 1: they're not. Look in the mirror. And it's a dance studio, 169 00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:20,480 Speaker 1: so there's mirrors in every wall. And sure enough, as 170 00:08:20,520 --> 00:08:23,440 Speaker 1: I walk left fot twelve o'clock, right foot eleven left 171 00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:25,960 Speaker 1: fot twelve o'clock, right foot one, left foot twelve o'clock 172 00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:29,600 Speaker 1: ten thirty one one point thirty ten two on the right, 173 00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:31,760 Speaker 1: just flapping around like I'm a kid with flippers on 174 00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:36,200 Speaker 1: a pool deck. Giranni was really patient with me because 175 00:08:37,040 --> 00:08:39,160 Speaker 1: I have a brain that can get sidetracked. I can 176 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:43,120 Speaker 1: get very focused and very sidetracked. And I did have 177 00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:46,400 Speaker 1: to explain to her after a little while, Oh, if 178 00:08:46,440 --> 00:08:50,760 Speaker 1: I just start talking at you without listening about something 179 00:08:50,760 --> 00:08:52,319 Speaker 1: that's got nothing to do with what we're talking about, 180 00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:55,319 Speaker 1: you are fine to stop me. I don't realize sometimes 181 00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:57,520 Speaker 1: when I got caught in those moments, particularly if I'm 182 00:08:57,559 --> 00:09:00,600 Speaker 1: quite excited and you know, passionate, because we're I got 183 00:09:00,600 --> 00:09:02,680 Speaker 1: to dance and talk about music the whole time. It 184 00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:05,040 Speaker 1: was fucking good. I wanted to tell stories and all 185 00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:07,959 Speaker 1: kinds of things. And there was one particular moment I 186 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:12,040 Speaker 1: think I'd spend a good twelve minutes just on and improvised, 187 00:09:12,120 --> 00:09:14,600 Speaker 1: and let me tell you very informative lecture about the 188 00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:17,160 Speaker 1: difference between the lind drum machine and the Rollin eight 189 00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:20,200 Speaker 1: oh eight drum machine, and how those two instruments really 190 00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:22,960 Speaker 1: changed popular music forever. Oh my gosh, here's some examples 191 00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:24,960 Speaker 1: on Spotify. Here's a print song. He had a lin drum. 192 00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:26,280 Speaker 1: Oh I got to here's the eight. Oh. Wait, isn't 193 00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:27,920 Speaker 1: this incredible? You could tune the drum on the oud 194 00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:29,640 Speaker 1: of wait, it turned it to house music. Da da 195 00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:31,679 Speaker 1: da da, And she just kind of look at me 196 00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:35,040 Speaker 1: like I don't know how to stop him. After all 197 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:37,600 Speaker 1: while I realized, oh fuck, I'm doing that. Okay, when 198 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:39,199 Speaker 1: I work with you, you should just put a hand up, 199 00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:40,600 Speaker 1: so if you do, if you need to just put 200 00:09:40,640 --> 00:09:42,520 Speaker 1: your hand up, I won't take offense. And sure enough 201 00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:45,719 Speaker 1: she did. It was great. So there was a lot. 202 00:09:46,080 --> 00:09:49,400 Speaker 1: My brain was really stimulated by learning all this stuff. 203 00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:51,920 Speaker 1: If anything, I wasn't physically tired. At the end of training. 204 00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:54,360 Speaker 1: I could get about four hours every day and at 205 00:09:54,360 --> 00:09:56,800 Speaker 1: the end of four hours, my brain would just fill up. 206 00:09:57,080 --> 00:10:01,040 Speaker 1: I wasn't physically pooped, generally, I just Cognie was unable 207 00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:03,720 Speaker 1: to remember or I would start to just get it wrong. 208 00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:07,480 Speaker 1: And I know enough about learning that if I start 209 00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:09,240 Speaker 1: to get it wrong, it's important to go do something else, 210 00:10:09,240 --> 00:10:11,760 Speaker 1: because you don't want to lay down memory of an 211 00:10:11,760 --> 00:10:13,960 Speaker 1: incorrect move. You want to get it right. And so 212 00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:15,880 Speaker 1: we would stop and we'd do something else. Strownie was 213 00:10:15,960 --> 00:10:18,199 Speaker 1: very good with that. Also, she let me remember it 214 00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:20,320 Speaker 1: in my own way because she had all the borroom 215 00:10:20,360 --> 00:10:21,640 Speaker 1: names for it, but I didn't know what they were, 216 00:10:21,679 --> 00:10:23,959 Speaker 1: so I just called them what they standed like. Okay, 217 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:26,440 Speaker 1: so this one is this four Happy Days into two 218 00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:30,440 Speaker 1: Helen Mirren's and then rotating Michael Flatley. Yes, it is, 219 00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:33,400 Speaker 1: and that's how I remembered it. Helen Maren, Helen Mirren, 220 00:10:33,440 --> 00:10:36,320 Speaker 1: Michael Flatley, Michael Flatley. That's what I would do. But 221 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:39,240 Speaker 1: that was rehearsal when we got to the studio. That's 222 00:10:39,280 --> 00:10:42,640 Speaker 1: another thing altogether, because I did not expect how much 223 00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:47,160 Speaker 1: my subconscious subroutines from my brain. Having worked in a 224 00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:50,360 Speaker 1: life television for so long, I didn't realize how many 225 00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:52,280 Speaker 1: of them I would need to overcome. And I'll tell 226 00:10:52,280 --> 00:11:01,360 Speaker 1: you about that after the break. Thank you so much 227 00:11:01,360 --> 00:11:02,920 Speaker 1: for listening to the show. We're just talking a bit 228 00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:05,440 Speaker 1: about Dancing with the Stars. The first episode that I 229 00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:07,080 Speaker 1: was on last night, if you watched it, you would 230 00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:08,440 Speaker 1: have seen the dance we did. It was called the 231 00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:11,840 Speaker 1: slow Foxtrot. Nothing slow or foxy about it, very hard. 232 00:11:11,960 --> 00:11:14,199 Speaker 1: It started with me coming out of a pretender door 233 00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:17,320 Speaker 1: and turning around finding Trianny and we're heading off now. 234 00:11:17,520 --> 00:11:20,040 Speaker 1: That day when we first rehearsed it. On that day, 235 00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:22,760 Speaker 1: a couple of strange things really happened to me, and 236 00:11:22,880 --> 00:11:26,160 Speaker 1: I just exploded the rehearsal. Rehearsal blew up as soon 237 00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:28,160 Speaker 1: as I came through the door. It takes Frianni in 238 00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:30,040 Speaker 1: my dancing frame, which is really weird. Do not look 239 00:11:30,040 --> 00:11:32,120 Speaker 1: at them, Never look at them. This is badroom dancing. 240 00:11:32,160 --> 00:11:35,120 Speaker 1: We don't look at that. I don't know why we 241 00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:36,560 Speaker 1: got a couple of steps in. She's like, what are 242 00:11:36,559 --> 00:11:39,480 Speaker 1: we doing over here? Because we were supposed to go 243 00:11:39,559 --> 00:11:41,080 Speaker 1: in a straight line. It ended up we ended up 244 00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:42,920 Speaker 1: way over in the corner. I'm like, I don't know, 245 00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:45,839 Speaker 1: were suddenly over here? She's like, well, what happens, Like, 246 00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:47,120 Speaker 1: I don't know, let me think about it. Let me 247 00:11:47,160 --> 00:11:49,800 Speaker 1: think about it. I figured out that there was actually 248 00:11:49,840 --> 00:11:52,000 Speaker 1: two things in the same way that you probably haven't 249 00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:54,000 Speaker 1: thought about turning on the indicator when you're driving since 250 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:57,000 Speaker 1: you passed your driving test, yet it still happens. I 251 00:11:57,040 --> 00:11:59,400 Speaker 1: didn't realize that I had all these tiny little adjustments 252 00:11:59,440 --> 00:12:01,680 Speaker 1: and subroutiness going on in my head from years of 253 00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:05,280 Speaker 1: live television. For example, one of the wild because he 254 00:12:05,360 --> 00:12:08,240 Speaker 1: was in the room, the guy who was on camera 255 00:12:08,320 --> 00:12:09,880 Speaker 1: the first day I was everyone Channel V. He was 256 00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:12,600 Speaker 1: on camera for Dancing with the Stars Peter, and he 257 00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:15,480 Speaker 1: told me, if you can't see a key light, I 258 00:12:15,520 --> 00:12:17,800 Speaker 1: can't see you. You know, this is important in live 259 00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:19,680 Speaker 1: TV moment because you want to go with the flow. 260 00:12:19,679 --> 00:12:21,280 Speaker 1: When you want to grab someone in an audience, if 261 00:12:21,320 --> 00:12:23,440 Speaker 1: someone's having a big reaction and a reality show and 262 00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:25,320 Speaker 1: you want to make oh, there's incredible, you can just 263 00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:28,240 Speaker 1: shepherd them slightly two steps to the left so you're 264 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:30,840 Speaker 1: both lit and then you can have this emotional response 265 00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:33,040 Speaker 1: and be on camera rather than stopping it. And it's 266 00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:36,160 Speaker 1: really important to do this kind of stuff. And when 267 00:12:36,160 --> 00:12:38,240 Speaker 1: Serannie said, what are we doing over hairs? I only 268 00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:42,000 Speaker 1: afterwards I was like, oh shit, I'd lost a key light. 269 00:12:42,760 --> 00:12:45,480 Speaker 1: I kept trying to get us back to where I 270 00:12:45,559 --> 00:12:49,040 Speaker 1: knew there was a light. Another thing that was really 271 00:12:49,040 --> 00:12:51,959 Speaker 1: weird is that if you watch the shot as soon 272 00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:54,559 Speaker 1: as we come through the door, it's a steady cam shot, 273 00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:56,680 Speaker 1: which is the one you see sometimes on the sidelines 274 00:12:56,720 --> 00:12:58,640 Speaker 1: of the footy, but just a big thing. They wear 275 00:12:58,640 --> 00:13:01,520 Speaker 1: a metallic kind of clear bond vest and it's very 276 00:13:01,520 --> 00:13:04,880 Speaker 1: heavily sprung. It weighs twenty or thirty kiloers. It's a 277 00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:07,439 Speaker 1: very hard job to do, but it's an amazing subjective 278 00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:09,760 Speaker 1: camera shot. There's two people that operate at One person 279 00:13:09,800 --> 00:13:11,720 Speaker 1: holds the camera, the other person basically has their back 280 00:13:11,760 --> 00:13:14,520 Speaker 1: and because they're looking down, they operators headed looking down, 281 00:13:15,480 --> 00:13:17,640 Speaker 1: and the other person just helps keep other things out 282 00:13:17,679 --> 00:13:20,120 Speaker 1: of the way because they're often running and they are 283 00:13:20,240 --> 00:13:22,880 Speaker 1: as choreographed as we are, so John O, who's an 284 00:13:22,880 --> 00:13:26,480 Speaker 1: amazing operator. As I come through the door, JOHNO is 285 00:13:26,480 --> 00:13:29,400 Speaker 1: coming towards me and in the back of my head 286 00:13:29,640 --> 00:13:32,600 Speaker 1: my TV brain is going Steady's trying to get a shot. 287 00:13:32,640 --> 00:13:35,440 Speaker 1: I should get out of the way, because if you're 288 00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:38,520 Speaker 1: in a TV studio and a camera is moving towards 289 00:13:38,520 --> 00:13:42,520 Speaker 1: you from the peripheral. With me, the camera is always 290 00:13:42,520 --> 00:13:44,360 Speaker 1: in front of me, so if the camera is ever 291 00:13:44,400 --> 00:13:46,320 Speaker 1: to the side, well, I'm not at the shot. So 292 00:13:46,400 --> 00:13:47,720 Speaker 1: i have to get out of the way because Steady's 293 00:13:47,720 --> 00:13:50,000 Speaker 1: taking a shot of something else. So I'm trying to 294 00:13:50,040 --> 00:13:51,400 Speaker 1: move as fast as I can to get out of 295 00:13:51,440 --> 00:13:53,360 Speaker 1: the way Steady. Steady is trying to keep me in 296 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:56,120 Speaker 1: frame and so running towards me. It wasn't only until 297 00:13:56,120 --> 00:13:57,800 Speaker 1: afterwards that I realized that was going on. I was like, 298 00:13:57,840 --> 00:13:59,200 Speaker 1: oh shit, I'm trying to get out of the way 299 00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:03,080 Speaker 1: Steady taking this shot. But Steady's taking the shot of me, 300 00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:06,040 Speaker 1: and suddenly I'm in the wrong spot, doing the wrong thing. 301 00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:09,280 Speaker 1: And it was only afterwards that I realized this. But 302 00:14:09,320 --> 00:14:12,199 Speaker 1: what was sweet The next time we rehearsed, Audrey and 303 00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:14,439 Speaker 1: Wolfgang actually came to visit the studio a few times 304 00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:16,280 Speaker 1: during rehearsals because it was school holidays and it was 305 00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:17,959 Speaker 1: nice to come and hang out, and he was hanging 306 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:21,200 Speaker 1: out with Strianni's daughter. It was really fun. But when 307 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,520 Speaker 1: they showed up, wolf and Georgia and Audrey had come 308 00:14:23,560 --> 00:14:25,200 Speaker 1: and seen me dance and the show you saw last 309 00:14:25,280 --> 00:14:28,960 Speaker 1: night and Wolfe, Yeah, Dad, you dance, that's great. Whose 310 00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:30,600 Speaker 1: job is it to run around you with the camera? 311 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:33,840 Speaker 1: So that's John O. He was like, that is awesome. 312 00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:36,280 Speaker 1: So he'd made out of his little soccer cones, you 313 00:14:36,320 --> 00:14:38,400 Speaker 1: know those little cones that you know, you've set up 314 00:14:38,400 --> 00:14:40,400 Speaker 1: a little soccer game with two little cones. As he got, 315 00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:42,840 Speaker 1: he brought two of them, strapped it together with the 316 00:14:42,920 --> 00:14:45,440 Speaker 1: rehab rubber band, put some sticky tape on it and 317 00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:48,040 Speaker 1: they said, this is my steady cams. Great. So when 318 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:51,400 Speaker 1: he came to the studio, the rehearsal studio, as Srinani 319 00:14:51,440 --> 00:14:54,040 Speaker 1: and I took off on our next dance, we were rehearsing, 320 00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:56,920 Speaker 1: Wolfy just came out and he started just running circles 321 00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:58,560 Speaker 1: around us. And it was really good because I had 322 00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:02,080 Speaker 1: never when we're rehearsing, no one had ever been near 323 00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:03,960 Speaker 1: me and I would kind of lose my bearings, but 324 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:06,520 Speaker 1: really helped having Wolfe there. It was really sweet. I'll 325 00:15:06,560 --> 00:15:07,920 Speaker 1: try and put some video of that because it was 326 00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:12,200 Speaker 1: super cute. I've been reflecting a lot about what happened 327 00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:15,000 Speaker 1: as a part of that show. All I could control 328 00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:17,600 Speaker 1: was how much effort I put into this. When we 329 00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:19,840 Speaker 1: finish that dance, then the other part of the show 330 00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:23,520 Speaker 1: comes on, and as a TV person, I'm like, yes, 331 00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,000 Speaker 1: this is a part of me. And I even said 332 00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:26,320 Speaker 1: to the producers, I just want it to be a 333 00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:27,520 Speaker 1: great show. I want to be a part of making 334 00:15:27,520 --> 00:15:29,640 Speaker 1: a great show, and I want to make sure that 335 00:15:29,680 --> 00:15:31,880 Speaker 1: the judges have we get to make a great moment together. 336 00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:33,760 Speaker 1: And so I'd like to think that I gave the 337 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:36,000 Speaker 1: judges a good reason to have a great moment together. 338 00:15:36,760 --> 00:15:38,320 Speaker 1: All I can control is the amount of effort I 339 00:15:38,360 --> 00:15:40,760 Speaker 1: put into something. I can't control what another person thinks 340 00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:43,360 Speaker 1: about it. I know I'm on a reality TV show. 341 00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:45,720 Speaker 1: I know how these things work. Here comes the judging moment. 342 00:15:46,120 --> 00:15:49,440 Speaker 1: I'm going to do the part, and there's the moment. 343 00:15:49,480 --> 00:15:52,560 Speaker 1: There it is. Even though I was willingly playing with it, 344 00:15:53,240 --> 00:15:57,520 Speaker 1: I did not realize that I actually needed a lot 345 00:15:57,560 --> 00:16:01,000 Speaker 1: more external validation than I thought I did. I truly 346 00:16:01,080 --> 00:16:03,480 Speaker 1: believe that I am translndent and I'm fine and I 347 00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:06,960 Speaker 1: don't care what other people think about me. Not exactly true. 348 00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:11,320 Speaker 1: I had to face that, like, oh man, I'm actually 349 00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:15,840 Speaker 1: I feel a bit sad that they didn't say I 350 00:16:15,920 --> 00:16:19,400 Speaker 1: was amazing at this. I mean I wasn't and it's fine, 351 00:16:20,200 --> 00:16:23,960 Speaker 1: but a small part of me, maybe twenty five thirty 352 00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:27,080 Speaker 1: percent of me was like nah, I was like, this 353 00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:29,880 Speaker 1: isn't that interesting? And I've got to really look at 354 00:16:29,880 --> 00:16:31,160 Speaker 1: that and own it. And I was sitting in my 355 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:34,320 Speaker 1: sauna every night, going, well, look at that. Tell me, 356 00:16:34,400 --> 00:16:36,640 Speaker 1: let's explore this. This is really fascinating. What part of 357 00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:38,560 Speaker 1: you hurts, what part of me hurts, and just kind 358 00:16:38,560 --> 00:16:40,800 Speaker 1: of noticing those thoughts and feelings, replaying those moments in 359 00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:44,200 Speaker 1: my mind. And like I said, it really helped editing 360 00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:46,040 Speaker 1: the final version of So What Now What, because I 361 00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:49,280 Speaker 1: was utilizing every one of the things in that book. 362 00:16:49,960 --> 00:16:52,760 Speaker 1: Every day I'm rehearsing and in the nighttime I'm editing 363 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:54,920 Speaker 1: and sketching things with Cam and building the rest of 364 00:16:54,960 --> 00:16:56,920 Speaker 1: this book, and I'm using all the techniques that we 365 00:16:56,960 --> 00:17:00,800 Speaker 1: talked about. Because I was a it was as much 366 00:17:00,840 --> 00:17:03,640 Speaker 1: work to keep my head screwed on as it was 367 00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:07,080 Speaker 1: to keep my body working. There's just a couple of thoughts. 368 00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:09,199 Speaker 1: There's more to come, There's more dancing to come, but 369 00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:11,040 Speaker 1: I don't want to. I'll tell you about it that 370 00:17:11,119 --> 00:17:12,680 Speaker 1: next time. I think it's about another two weeks or 371 00:17:12,720 --> 00:17:14,360 Speaker 1: so before I dance again. Because it was a group 372 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:16,240 Speaker 1: and B group. I was in a B group. I 373 00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:18,320 Speaker 1: don't want to spoil anything. It's a very fun adventure 374 00:17:18,400 --> 00:17:21,879 Speaker 1: this show. But the lesson that I could share with 375 00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:25,320 Speaker 1: you out of it today was that I was really 376 00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:28,119 Speaker 1: proud of saying yes to it. I I'll encourage you 377 00:17:28,160 --> 00:17:33,320 Speaker 1: to do the same, because, like I said, it's important 378 00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:39,359 Speaker 1: to do things that are hard. It's important to find humility. 379 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:41,840 Speaker 1: It was frustrating to not be able to do it 380 00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:43,880 Speaker 1: as well as I wanted to do it, but that's 381 00:17:43,920 --> 00:17:47,800 Speaker 1: the show, and that's the moments they capture on camera. 382 00:17:47,880 --> 00:17:51,600 Speaker 1: It was really fascinating watching that part of my brain 383 00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:54,920 Speaker 1: that wanted other people to like me really fire up. 384 00:17:55,280 --> 00:17:56,880 Speaker 1: I'll talk to you about it more after the next 385 00:17:56,880 --> 00:18:01,680 Speaker 1: time that we have a dancing show. I will say, though, 386 00:18:01,800 --> 00:18:03,080 Speaker 1: if you do want to hear me tell a story, 387 00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:04,800 Speaker 1: you want to come to the live show. We've got 388 00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:06,760 Speaker 1: the next Story Club show on the sixth of July 389 00:18:07,280 --> 00:18:11,200 Speaker 1: with Marley Silver, Merrick Watts, Phil O'Neil, Nadia Townsend, Zoet 390 00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:13,800 Speaker 1: Lodging myself, the femas. Everybody needs good neighbors You can 391 00:18:13,840 --> 00:18:16,200 Speaker 1: get the tickets in the show notes, as well as 392 00:18:16,240 --> 00:18:19,560 Speaker 1: where the substack is, which has a couple of full 393 00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:23,160 Speaker 1: length stories. Larry's is up there, Duncan Fellows, Hannah Riley, 394 00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:26,480 Speaker 1: they're all there, the full stories there for subscribers. Have 395 00:18:26,560 --> 00:18:29,919 Speaker 1: a fantastic week. I'll see you back here on Wednesday. 396 00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:33,800 Speaker 1: Thanks Adam a bunch of for producing this show. I'm 397 00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:38,040 Speaker 1: off to drink the rest of this year, but Marte bye.