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Speaker 1: Coming up on Relatables.

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Speaker 2: I strongly believe that a man and a woman cannot

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Speaker 2: be best friends. As toxic as this may sound, men

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Speaker 2: really will only be friend in the best friend's sense

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Speaker 2: a female because they want something more.

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Speaker 3: I completely disagree. I think that's completely fine, and it

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Speaker 3: all comes down to trust. In the end, it all

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Speaker 3: comes down to trust. So maybe this is becoming a

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Speaker 3: trust problem for you. I went to therapy for the

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Speaker 3: first time. I've got a voice message of before and after.

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Speaker 1: Overall feelings probably nerves seven out of ten and relatable.

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Speaker 2: The Relatables podcast is hosted by myself, Jake Craig aka.

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Speaker 1: Big d and my partner in crime, Oddie Clark. Okay,

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Speaker 1: big m Yeah. The good thing about your one is

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Speaker 1: it can allude to something else. Well, yours could be well, yeah,

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Speaker 1: what could mine be? Big man? Jina, big muff? What

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Speaker 1: does that mean? A muff is a vagina? Oh? I

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Speaker 1: think it's a bit of a rude.

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Speaker 3: I was just trying to hype you up man. Welcome

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Speaker 3: back everybody too. This is the first proper episode.

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Speaker 1: This is the first.

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Speaker 2: Proper I mean not I mean stimulated.

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Speaker 1: It's a proper episode, I guess.

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Speaker 3: But for one of twenty twenty five, which I'm really

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Speaker 3: excited to record.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and I don't know if this is your first

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Speaker 2: time here. I guess it's a good place to start.

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Speaker 1: So welcome. Yeah, welcome all the baddies.

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Speaker 2: Welcome all the baddies. And if you're an existing baddie,

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Speaker 2: we love you. Thanks for coming into twenty twenty five.

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Speaker 2: And New Year knew us.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, new Year knew me. I hate that saying, but

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Speaker 1: it actually is kind of a semi new relatable. I'm

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Speaker 1: not a fan of like New Year's resolutions. Really are you?

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Speaker 2: In the past? I have been, but I found when

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Speaker 2: people do a bunch, it's like I'm guilty as well

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Speaker 2: if I do a bunch, I don't ever do one.

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Speaker 2: So maybe after we do our first segment.

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Speaker 1: Would you say you just agreed with me? Then you

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Speaker 1: don't like resolutions? No, I don't. You said you do.

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Speaker 1: I don't like it. I don't like I agreed with you.

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Speaker 1: We're agreeing too much, man. Yeah. Yeah, And that's what

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Speaker 1: we're going to do to start the New year is argue.

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Speaker 2: We're going to have We're going to try and attempt

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Speaker 2: an argument, a stage argument.

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Speaker 1: Because me and Jake agree too much stage. But not scripted, Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Not scripted at all. This is all coming from our

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Speaker 3: free will. Off the cuff, Yeah, off the cuff. Today's

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Speaker 3: argument is going to be girls and guys can be

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Speaker 3: best friends. How this is going to work is one

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Speaker 3: of us is going to flip a coin and whoever

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Speaker 3: wins gets to pick which side of the argument.

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Speaker 1: They argue for.

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Speaker 3: Yes, and we all know where Jake and I stand

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Speaker 3: on this. Yep, this is a hill we're willing to

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Speaker 3: die on that girls and guys can't be emphasis on

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Speaker 3: best best friends. They be friends with girls, but you

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Speaker 3: can't be best you can't be friends.

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Speaker 1: And we've never been proven wrong. Yeah not yet. I

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Speaker 1: will say I read a dilemma that I chose not

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Speaker 1: to bring to the episode that it may have proved

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Speaker 1: us wrong.

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Speaker 2: So you want to put a coin? Okay, Yeah, so

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Speaker 2: that's an argument. Should we just quickly state we're not

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Speaker 2: don't shy away. Also, you can send us argument topics. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: we'll think of them obviously. But if you have good

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Speaker 2: if you want to hear us argue about something.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, do it.

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Speaker 2: Okay, So you want to call it on me ode?

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Speaker 1: This is one with the king on it it's a

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Speaker 1: new coin because we're part of the common we'll keep

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Speaker 1: this one in the studio.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, so you call it in the air?

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Speaker 1: Okay, heads, Oh it's tail. What do you want so

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Speaker 1: I get to choose. I would like to argue that

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Speaker 1: guys and girls cannot be best damn it, because that's

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Speaker 1: what you actually believe.

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Speaker 2: You can start Okay, okay, okay, I guess this is

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Speaker 2: of us. No serious guys. We should have like ominous

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Speaker 2: music of this because you'd.

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Speaker 1: Like being a debater. We're gonna get good at this.

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Speaker 1: It's a bit of improv. Okay, ready, yeah, ready, yeah.

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Speaker 2: I strongly believe that a man and a woman cannot

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Speaker 2: be best friends because I look at it as coming

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Speaker 2: from a male. As toxic as this may sound, men

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Speaker 2: really will only be friend in the best friends sense

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Speaker 2: a female because they want something more.

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Speaker 3: Completely disagree, because is that? Are you sexualizing the relationship? Yes,

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Speaker 3: and that's what I'm saying, men's sexualized relation. I think

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Speaker 3: girls and guys can be best friends in a completely

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Speaker 3: platonic situation where there is no sex involved.

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Speaker 1: I think that is completely fine. Yeah yeah, well, how.

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Speaker 2: Would you feel if each if the male and the

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Speaker 2: female that are quote unquote best friends. We're both in

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Speaker 2: a relationship heterosexually. So the guy was with a girl

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Speaker 2: and the girl was with a guy.

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Speaker 3: I think that's completely fine, and it all comes down

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Speaker 3: to trust in the end.

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Speaker 1: It all comes down to trust.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, as the partner on the other side of those

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Speaker 3: relationships of the best friends, they just have to trust

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Speaker 3: that their partner will not dive into the sexual side

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Speaker 3: of a relationship is just completely platonic as best friends. Okay,

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Speaker 3: So maybe this is becoming a trust problem for you.

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Speaker 1: I hear what you're saying.

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Speaker 2: I would like to kindly and respectfully disagree with you.

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Speaker 1: I'm glad you're respectful, and I would like fuck okay.

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Speaker 2: So look the way I look at it is coming

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Speaker 2: from where.

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Speaker 1: I stand at it.

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Speaker 2: Right of a man is quite often sexualizing a relationship.

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Speaker 1: Don't get me wrong.

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Speaker 2: I think a guy and a girl can be friends,

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Speaker 2: and maybe they can be best friends while both single.

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Speaker 1: Right, I don't.

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Speaker 2: I don't think personally in my own life experience, I've

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Speaker 2: never seen it work out right. But I do feel

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Speaker 2: as though once the male gets a girlfriend and maybe

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Speaker 2: the female still single. As a respect thing for me,

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Speaker 2: I don't know how. I don't know if it's all

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Speaker 2: that respectful to be spending a lot of time one

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Speaker 2: on one with another female and vice versa. I don't

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Speaker 2: believe if the female was to get a boyfriend, I could, like,

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Speaker 2: I wouldn't. I'd fully understand if the boyfriend felt a

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Speaker 2: little bit weird that she spent a lot of one

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Speaker 2: on one time with the male. Because when you have

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Speaker 2: a fight, who do you go to?

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Speaker 1: Your best friend? True?

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Speaker 2: Whenever thing, when stuff happens to do you go to

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Speaker 2: your bestment?

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Speaker 1: When you have sex with the first time, who do

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Speaker 1: you go for?

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Speaker 3: You?

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Speaker 1: Your best friend? Like?

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Speaker 2: And I think I could be thinking I could be

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Speaker 2: stuck in the stone age, you know, but I don't

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Speaker 2: believe that it could work.

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Speaker 1: Are you saying that?

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Speaker 3: When said because all relationships fight that if when the

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Speaker 3: friend comes to the best friend of the opposite sex,

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Speaker 3: they have an ulterior automotive in the back of their

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Speaker 3: mind and they're always going to pick the best friend

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Speaker 3: and they're thinking about how can I be the next

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Speaker 3: relationship if they are best friends?

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Speaker 2: Yes, So I would like to point out that the

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Speaker 2: reason I think I haven't pointed out for me, the

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Speaker 2: main reason I do think that are going to go

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Speaker 2: I can't be best friends is because one of them

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Speaker 2: has an ulterior motive, right, And so in my argument's sake,

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Speaker 2: I don't have any argument if there's neither.

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Speaker 1: If neither one of them have an ulterior motive, I

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Speaker 1: don't have an argument for that.

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Speaker 2: But my argument is that one of them always has

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Speaker 2: an ulterior motive, if that makes sense.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I definitely agree that ninety nine percent. At the time,

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Speaker 1: the guy normally has anterior automotive, and he's probably liked

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Speaker 1: the girl for a couple of years. But that's beside

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Speaker 1: the point.

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Speaker 3: I think it all comes down to, I see where

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Speaker 3: you're coming from. Yeah, and I think it works when

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Speaker 3: the guy especially is a good guy, which for most

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Speaker 3: of the time they're not, I think.

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Speaker 1: So I don't.

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Speaker 3: Agree with you completely, but to a certain extent, I

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Speaker 3: think girls and guys the reason you think they can't

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Speaker 3: be best friends is because men have ulterior automotives, and

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Speaker 3: these men are trapped and are happy to play on

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Speaker 3: the sidelines and wait for their chance. But it can

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Speaker 3: work if guys were nicer, okay, and like they were

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Speaker 3: men of their word.

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Speaker 2: Now, I would like to say that we're speaking from

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Speaker 2: male experience, right.

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Speaker 1: We would like girls we know and.

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Speaker 2: We know how men think, right, But who's to say.

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Speaker 2: I do think it's more common for a man to

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Speaker 2: have an ulterior motive than the woman. But if the

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Speaker 2: woman has an ulterior motive, I've heard little whispers in

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Speaker 2: the air before that. Apparently females can also get quite

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Speaker 2: feisty and not give a fuck about their gender, just

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Speaker 2: like men won't give a fuck about the other dude.

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Speaker 2: They will break girl code, just like guys will break

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Speaker 2: guy code.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so I.

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Speaker 3: Think it is completely individualized, and I think I'm out.

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Speaker 1: I think I'm out. Let me hear you with one

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Speaker 1: more thing, How confident would you be if you if

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Speaker 1: we could sit down a guy best friend with one

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Speaker 1: of those polygraph tests, not very confident.

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Speaker 3: I'd have to know the guy. I'd have to actually

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Speaker 3: know the guy and know he's a good bloke. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: and know he didn't have lar automotives, and know if.

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Speaker 1: You were putting money on it, I can't have given up.

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Speaker 1: You see the guys looking at their girl best friend

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Speaker 1: like they're in love. You see that they always do.

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Speaker 3: You see that little eye flicker in their eye and

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Speaker 3: they're like my best friends.

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Speaker 1: Well I'm out. That was a tough Actually it is

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Speaker 1: hard to do.

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Speaker 3: That was tough, but any guy anyway, guys, I think also,

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Speaker 3: like Jake said, start sending any interesting arguments you guys

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Speaker 3: would like.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fun. I don't know if I

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Speaker 2: fully stand like I don't. I don't know if I'm

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Speaker 2: willing to fully die on the hill where of like

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Speaker 2: the avenue I.

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Speaker 1: Was coming out, but I really was. I think you've

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Speaker 1: got to see that. Also, one of us is going

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Speaker 1: to have to be toxic. Yeah. Yeah, and that's the

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Speaker 1: fun thing. Yeah, that's the fun side of it.

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Speaker 3: Like it's playing on that it's not completely what we

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Speaker 3: believe you trying to win the argument.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what I will say is actually I

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Speaker 2: reckon the hardest part will be being toxic.

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Speaker 1: That's what we need to get better at. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 1: gonna hard.

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Speaker 3: But Jake, after that argument, we have a little bit

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Speaker 3: of a big announcement.

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Speaker 2: Don't we We do.

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Speaker 1: Jake has been a very very good co host and

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Speaker 1: going out of his way to get a little bit

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Speaker 1: of a giveaway for you guys something to start your

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Speaker 1: year off with a with a.

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Speaker 3: Bang bang hidden within this episode, there will be one

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Speaker 3: QR code that takes you to a Google doc where

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Speaker 3: you can.

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Speaker 2: Enter the giveaway to win two Gracy Abrams tickets for Sydney.

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Speaker 2: All you have to do is firstly watch the episode

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Speaker 2: and find the QR code, and then they'll be able

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Speaker 2: to attach a screenshot of you five star reviewing this

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Speaker 2: episode yep. And that's and then leave your name obviously yep,

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Speaker 2: an email or whatever I put in there, and you

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Speaker 2: will be entered into the Gracy Abrams tickets you go

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Speaker 2: in joy Hopefully you can find it.

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Speaker 1: There might be a few decoys. Jake, let's catch up. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: let's catch up. It's been a while.

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Speaker 3: Before we get into our catch up, I have an

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Speaker 3: announcement for everyone listening. A congratulation. Here's a handshake man

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Speaker 3: and shape and you know it's serious when I didn't

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Speaker 3: pull away. Yeah, congratulations on.

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Speaker 1: A whole year of sobriety.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, no alcohol touched Jake's lips in twenty twenty

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Speaker 3: four and he said that at the start of the year.

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Speaker 1: So I think that was a New Years resolution.

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Speaker 3: Was a resolution, and you did it and it's easier

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Speaker 3: said than done. So congratulations, man, Thank you.

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Speaker 1: Thank you very much. I'm it's funny you had the

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Speaker 1: word sobriety makes it sound like I needed to.

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Speaker 3: So I was thinking when I was bringing it up, like,

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Speaker 3: but it is still sobriety is it is onred percent.

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Speaker 3: Everyone comes from different reasons to why they don't want

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Speaker 3: to touch alcohol, if it's abuse or if you just

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Speaker 3: don't like it, or if.

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Speaker 1: It's anything like that.

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Speaker 3: So either way the word is it's a hard thing

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Speaker 3: to do, especially with when we talk about peer pressure,

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Speaker 3: friends going out everything like that. So it's so normalized

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Speaker 3: in social settings. So congrats for that. How do you feel,

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Speaker 3: I mean, I feel good, the I don't.

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Speaker 2: I was talking to my dad because they moved to

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Speaker 2: Queensland and I was up there with him and he

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Speaker 2: was having a wine and I was having like a

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Speaker 2: diet coke and it was in the same glass and zero.

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Speaker 1: It's actually coke zero.

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Speaker 2: Thank you for the correction and.

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Speaker 1: Big different and so sence, I know you.

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Speaker 2: I had fizzing when I took a sip. The balls

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Speaker 2: were hitting my nose and so he had his red

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Speaker 2: wine and then he was joking around. He was like,

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Speaker 2: I just got my coke zero here, and I was like, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 2: we should switch, And then he did. He asked me,

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Speaker 2: he was like, oh, he's like, how'd you go this year?

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Speaker 1: And I was like yeah, I was sweet.

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Speaker 2: You so you didn't feel He's like, you didn't feel

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Speaker 2: any any urge and I was like nah, And I

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Speaker 2: kind of thought about it.

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Speaker 1: And I think the reason is because when I.

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Speaker 2: Was a cole years ago, obviously, like when we were

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Speaker 2: drinking most weekends, it was during that time, I would

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Speaker 2: only drink on the weekends and just like same as you, like,

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Speaker 2: we wouldn't drink through the week no, no, no, we wouldn't

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Speaker 2: come home from work and have a drink to.

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Speaker 1: Run special occasions if we wanted to party.

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Speaker 2: Yes, And like most weekends we just wanted to go party.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: And then like I think during the week, if I

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Speaker 2: went out to like the pub for dinner, I would

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Speaker 2: have had a beer, right, But I never got to

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Speaker 2: a point where every day I'd come home and crack

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Speaker 2: open a couple of beers, just like relax and wind

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Speaker 2: down from work. And I think that might be the

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Speaker 2: reason that I don't ever feel any sort of need

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Speaker 2: to need to yeah, because I never got to the

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Speaker 2: point where I used it to Relax were classified as

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Speaker 2: bins drinkers.

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Speaker 1: We only really drunk to other drunk.

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Speaker 3: If we didn't really drink in the pub, would have

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Speaker 3: the occasional beer, but that was like once a month,

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Speaker 3: if that, which I think because I'm similar, I only

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Speaker 3: drank three.

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Speaker 1: Times last year. I think maybe twice Fred again on

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Speaker 1: my birthday? No twice?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so when you're into balley, did you only drink once?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? I only drink on my birthday? Well fuck yeah, right,

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Speaker 1: so you only drank twice and I only drink get

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Speaker 1: fucked up? Yeah, like I did it.

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Speaker 3: I didn't go out on New Year's but I went

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Speaker 3: out on the second and saw someone at the Ivy

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Speaker 3: in Sydney. Yeah, Sammy Virgie, which was actually really fun.

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Speaker 1: I had a great time.

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Speaker 2: So actually, last year you only drank once?

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Speaker 1: No, no Fred again?

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Speaker 2: And oh sorry, so the one you're talking about for second,

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Speaker 2: you're counting in twenty twenty.

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Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah, so I'm already one for this year,

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Speaker 3: but I don't see it. I didn't want to put

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Speaker 3: too much pressure on myself because I've done the no drinking.

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Speaker 1: Thing before too, and each to your own.

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Speaker 3: I'm proud of you for doing that, but I also

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Speaker 3: wanted to, like, if something pops up, I didn't want

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Speaker 3: to have in the back of my mind, I feel

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Speaker 3: guilty if I want to drunk at a festival or something,

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Speaker 3: I'm like, if I think that's cool, I want to

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Speaker 3: go do it.

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Speaker 1: Well, yeah, if you want to do something, yeah, should

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Speaker 1: be allowed to do it. Yeah, exactly, like if you

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Speaker 1: want to eat a piece of cake.

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Speaker 3: It's like I'm working out at the moment and I

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Speaker 3: feel guilty, Like I've got a big diet plan. I

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Speaker 3: feel guilty if I eat a bar chocolate. Yeah, if

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Speaker 3: I put this pressure on myself, that's one of my problems.

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Speaker 3: I feel guilty of doing something like that. So I

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Speaker 3: didn't want to put any pressure around drinking and partying

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Speaker 3: because if something did up come up, I wanted to

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Speaker 3: be like, yeah, let's do it.

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Speaker 2: But it's also pointed not put pressure around it because

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Speaker 2: you don't do it often. You know, you could take

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Speaker 2: into account that you did it twice last year. It's

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Speaker 2: like there would have been plenty of opportunities to do

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Speaker 2: it more than twice.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, heaps.

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Speaker 2: Like even I I like socially, you and I together,

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Speaker 2: there was situations where we could have had a drink

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Speaker 2: and we didn't.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and you didn't at the same time.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, We've have plenty of times where we can still

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Speaker 2: have any news resolutions. So I actually stuck to a

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Speaker 2: resolution last year, But did you get any this year?

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Speaker 3: Sort of subconsciously, do you have any for this year

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Speaker 3: news resolutions? I want to get on the cover of

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Speaker 3: Men's Health magazine Australia. Yeah, that's one of my things

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Speaker 3: actually sick. If you've seen my Instagram and TikTok, I've

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Speaker 3: got a little series go on doing that and I

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Speaker 3: actually want to get the most shredded I've ever been.

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Speaker 1: That's one of my goals. Well you're pretty shredded right now.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And I'm a month into like a twelve week

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Speaker 3: cut so see where I'm actually really enjoying it, like

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Speaker 3: I'm kind of getting addicted to it.

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Speaker 1: And then New Year's Resolution, there's a lot of.

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Speaker 3: Stuff podcasts wise, like the best podcast is I'm a

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Speaker 3: big man of things like that. Yeah, but nothing that

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Speaker 3: I went on our New Year's was actually me and

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Speaker 3: my girlfriend went down to the beach and wrote out goals,

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Speaker 3: not necessarily resolutions, goals for the twenty twenty five and

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Speaker 3: we wrote them down and then I've got them on

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Speaker 3: a piece of paper on my desk at home.

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Speaker 1: What about you any resolutions? I was.

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Speaker 2: I went into it this year thinking like like I

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Speaker 2: was like, I hate the word resolution.

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Speaker 1: How do I feel like resolution means like change yourself? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: there's something problem with me.

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Speaker 2: I think for the past couple of years, we've definitely

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Speaker 2: leaned into it. Like the first episode of those years

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Speaker 2: was what's our resolutions? Yeah, it's a whole probably had

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Speaker 2: nothing to talk about, so we were like, I feel.

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Speaker 1: About it resolution.

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Speaker 3: There's so much pressure on like the start of the

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Speaker 3: year to being like I've got to be a better

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Speaker 3: version of myself. Yeah, And I think it's okay just

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Speaker 3: to step back and be like if you're just doing

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Speaker 3: fine beforehand and just chilling doing your thing, like you

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Speaker 3: don't need a resolution?

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Speaker 1: Why?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, if you're happy, why do you need to change?

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Speaker 2: I So I've looked at it. I feel like we've

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Speaker 2: given advice before of like maybe we had a dilemma

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Speaker 2: or a question of like how do you how do

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Speaker 2: I stay into the gym?

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Speaker 1: How do I stay motivated in the gym? And I

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Speaker 1: think I remember giving advice of being.

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Speaker 2: Like just don't don't set too many gym goals at once,

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Speaker 2: you know, just like get in the habit of going

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Speaker 2: going there and walking on the treadmill for five minutes

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Speaker 2: a day just so you're actually going there, and then

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Speaker 2: like one of those days, you're just going to feel

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Speaker 2: like doing more. And so I got really like last

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Speaker 2: year for someone like I went to the gym. To

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Speaker 2: be fair, I guess if you look at the whole year,

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Speaker 2: I would have gone to the gym a lot, but

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Speaker 2: without any actual like proper motivation and that type of stuff.

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Speaker 2: And then I remember, I just remember, like when I

401
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Speaker 2: first fell in love.

402
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Speaker 1: With it, I fucking loved it.

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Speaker 2: You were so fucking my little ADHD brain just went hey, Yra,

404
00:17:33,240 --> 00:17:35,280
Speaker 2: and I just got so hyper focused on it and

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Speaker 2: I missed that. And so I was talking to Beth

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Speaker 2: and I was like, I just want to I don't

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Speaker 2: want to set any goals, but I just want to

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Speaker 2: like love it again. And so my main goal, I

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Speaker 2: think resolution is just I don't want to be a

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Speaker 2: certain look, I don't want to be a certain weight,

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Speaker 2: I don't want to be able to lift a certain amount.

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Speaker 1: I just want to love it again. Oh that's actually

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Speaker 1: a really healthy goal.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so what I want to start doing is like

415
00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:01,080
Speaker 2: just start Like I remember, it used to be a

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Speaker 2: full part of my day where it was like a

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Speaker 2: non negotiable thing. But then to the back end of

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Speaker 2: last year, I could easily be like, I'll just edit

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Speaker 2: instead of go to the gym, because I feel like

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Speaker 2: I'm doing something while I'm editing, and it's like, I'll

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Speaker 2: just do that instead.

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Speaker 1: It's funny you've brought up motivation there. Yeah, so you

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Speaker 1: think you've lost motivation. I think I maybe.

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Speaker 3: I've been thinking a lot about motivation, especially at the

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Speaker 3: start of the year, and like you said, we got

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Speaker 3: to ask a lot of questions, how do you stay motivated

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Speaker 3: in the gym? How to stay motivated with the podcast

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Speaker 3: and everything around that.

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Speaker 1: I've been thinking a lot about it. And I don't

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Speaker 1: particularly like the word motivation because I don't like any

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Speaker 1: words to say every word in the English station.

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Speaker 3: Actually, because I think it gets mislabeled because I don't

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Speaker 3: think any one person. I don't think you have less

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Speaker 3: motivation than me to go to the gym. I think

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Speaker 3: it gets mis labeled in a sense because motivation isn't anything.

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Speaker 1: No, I guess it's just the word we use to

437
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Speaker 1: say when someone's good at something like I'm so motivated

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Speaker 1: in the gym.

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Speaker 3: But realistically, you just got to strip back what I've

440
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:58,520
Speaker 3: talked about it before, systems in your life to go

441
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Speaker 3: to the gym and stay cons and make it easier

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00:19:01,320 --> 00:19:04,040
Speaker 3: to go to the gym, like for me or for you,

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00:19:04,080 --> 00:19:06,159
Speaker 3: just go buy some pre work and out through record,

444
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:07,359
Speaker 3: go have a scoop, and then you got to go

445
00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:11,240
Speaker 3: put this today good stuff, like put the systems in

446
00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:15,320
Speaker 3: place to keep you, in quotes motivated, to make it

447
00:19:15,359 --> 00:19:18,080
Speaker 3: easier to do the things that you aren't motivated for.

448
00:19:18,119 --> 00:19:20,960
Speaker 3: Because I'm not motivated anymore than any person at post

449
00:19:21,080 --> 00:19:22,800
Speaker 3: videos or go to the gym or anything like that.

450
00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:25,240
Speaker 3: I've just put the systems in place where I can

451
00:19:25,280 --> 00:19:26,400
Speaker 3: go easily.

452
00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:29,959
Speaker 1: Yeah when I have to. Yeah, fucking good point. I

453
00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:30,320
Speaker 1: like it.

454
00:19:30,440 --> 00:19:33,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, even stripping it back to like any the gym,

455
00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:36,960
Speaker 3: any exercise, going to do cardio, Like you don't want

456
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:38,200
Speaker 3: to do those things.

457
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,640
Speaker 1: Like especially no cardio, especially I don't know how you've

458
00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:42,840
Speaker 1: been doing. It's I don't want to do those things.

459
00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:44,760
Speaker 1: I've set up systems like I go there and I

460
00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:46,879
Speaker 1: have I have one lolly because I like this lolly.

461
00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:48,320
Speaker 1: I'm like, if I eat this lolly on the way

462
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:49,840
Speaker 1: of the gym and then do my cardio. And I'm

463
00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:52,840
Speaker 1: addicted to this next Netflix series called mad Men. Oh

464
00:19:52,840 --> 00:19:54,560
Speaker 1: that's right, yea you told me about It's like advertising

465
00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:56,399
Speaker 1: in the sixties, very weird show. I don't know how

466
00:19:56,440 --> 00:19:58,240
Speaker 1: I got onto it, but yeah, it's good and I'm

467
00:19:58,440 --> 00:20:00,679
Speaker 1: enjoying going to the gym and war walking on the

468
00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:03,640
Speaker 1: stairs and doing thirty minutes of stairs whilst watching this show.

469
00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:05,040
Speaker 2: I guess if you look at it, it's like you

470
00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:07,240
Speaker 2: would look at as like. So it's like, this is

471
00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:09,480
Speaker 2: my time where I get to binge of show guilt free.

472
00:20:09,520 --> 00:20:10,800
Speaker 2: I get to watch like three episodes.

473
00:20:10,880 --> 00:20:12,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, I get my lowry and then after I feel

474
00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:15,440
Speaker 3: really good and it's it's sort of like running high.

475
00:20:15,920 --> 00:20:16,600
Speaker 1: Like runners high.

476
00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:18,040
Speaker 3: You feel so good after it because you like, I

477
00:20:18,040 --> 00:20:19,879
Speaker 3: accomplish something and did something I didn't want to do,

478
00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:22,280
Speaker 3: and there's growth in that. So rather than being motivator,

479
00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:24,080
Speaker 3: is looking at it as something when you do something

480
00:20:24,119 --> 00:20:25,440
Speaker 3: you don't want to do, that's when you grow.

481
00:20:26,440 --> 00:20:28,760
Speaker 1: That's a very good point. Yeah, So I don't know

482
00:20:28,920 --> 00:20:29,800
Speaker 1: what's the fucking do cardia?

483
00:20:29,840 --> 00:20:31,520
Speaker 3: When you compare yourself to all these people on social

484
00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:32,879
Speaker 3: media and stuff, and they look good. They got to

485
00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:33,680
Speaker 3: the gym, they're doing cardia.

486
00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:35,280
Speaker 1: They don't want to do that either, that'd be hard.

487
00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:37,280
Speaker 3: They put the systems in place and they do it

488
00:20:37,320 --> 00:20:39,359
Speaker 3: because they feel like they have to, and then after

489
00:20:39,400 --> 00:20:40,080
Speaker 3: it they feel good.

490
00:20:40,320 --> 00:20:44,280
Speaker 1: Yeah. So I think taking away motivations, taking away motivation.

491
00:20:44,359 --> 00:20:46,920
Speaker 1: Resolution word? What what a shit word? Yeah? What a

492
00:20:46,920 --> 00:20:48,440
Speaker 1: ship word? Resolution out of motivation.

493
00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:50,640
Speaker 3: I think it's just all about stripping back, having fun,

494
00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:53,560
Speaker 3: putting the systems in place to do so, and just

495
00:20:53,720 --> 00:20:54,199
Speaker 3: enjoying it.

496
00:20:54,240 --> 00:20:56,960
Speaker 2: Like talking about TV shows quickly start best And I

497
00:20:57,000 --> 00:20:58,480
Speaker 2: started watching the show last night.

498
00:20:58,880 --> 00:21:01,440
Speaker 1: Card So you've watched them movie The Gentleman. Yeah, I

499
00:21:01,480 --> 00:21:03,200
Speaker 1: don't really like it, or you didn't like the movie

500
00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:04,919
Speaker 1: or shit, I rated the movie.

501
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,399
Speaker 2: But they made a TV show they did. Yeah, so

502
00:21:07,440 --> 00:21:09,240
Speaker 2: the same director, it's on Netflix. They met, the same

503
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,879
Speaker 2: director made a TV show. The only one season's out.

504
00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:14,879
Speaker 2: And you know the guy that plays his name's Theo James.

505
00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:17,399
Speaker 1: He plays as a young guy and gentlemen.

506
00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:20,639
Speaker 2: No, no, none of the people in the movie are

507
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:23,439
Speaker 2: in this. It's all new people. But the guy that

508
00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:25,520
Speaker 2: plays the main character is you know, have you watched Diversion?

509
00:21:25,760 --> 00:21:29,240
Speaker 1: Yeah? All that guy. Yeah. As soon as we fucking

510
00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:32,119
Speaker 1: as soon as we turn the first yeah, She's like,

511
00:21:32,119 --> 00:21:33,640
Speaker 1: we should watch this, and I was like, oh, yeah, yeah,

512
00:21:33,640 --> 00:21:35,640
Speaker 1: I like this. And then as soon as we turn

513
00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:38,280
Speaker 1: it on and he's in the first scene, Beth goes yeah, and.

514
00:21:38,240 --> 00:21:40,919
Speaker 2: I was like, whoa want?

515
00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:46,640
Speaker 1: I was like, fuck you. And I'm also recovering from

516
00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:50,440
Speaker 1: two crazy spider interactions. Did you watch my steptat I

517
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:52,119
Speaker 1: said you last night? No, I said you were suppoted

518
00:21:52,119 --> 00:21:53,800
Speaker 1: to go back to it right down, mate. Shit man,

519
00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:54,960
Speaker 1: I was about to go to bed. It was like

520
00:21:55,040 --> 00:21:58,640
Speaker 1: nine forty five, and then this spider came out of nowhere.

521
00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:01,960
Speaker 1: Really I was, so I was scared. Fuck I fool.

522
00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:07,680
Speaker 2: I'll tell you about my two interactions after I watched this, say, okay, man,

523
00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:09,080
Speaker 2: that's big.

524
00:22:11,320 --> 00:22:17,480
Speaker 1: I can't leave that one. Can't leave that one. Yeah, No,

525
00:22:17,560 --> 00:22:18,760
Speaker 1: that was bigger than my interactions.

526
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:21,359
Speaker 2: But so the two intractions I've had was Henry was

527
00:22:21,400 --> 00:22:24,000
Speaker 2: here and before bed, I was about to take him

528
00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:25,479
Speaker 2: for a piss. And you know, when you just come

529
00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:27,359
Speaker 2: out my door, you could go left down those stairs.

530
00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:30,240
Speaker 2: So I never go down scared. It's actually I never

531
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:32,479
Speaker 2: go down there, but to take Henry to piss. I've

532
00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:33,719
Speaker 2: been going down there because it's just I don't want

533
00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:34,919
Speaker 2: to go all the way up to the top. And

534
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:37,760
Speaker 2: so I was going down. There's no lights on, and

535
00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:39,600
Speaker 2: I'm just like walking down the stairs slowly, Henry kind

536
00:22:39,600 --> 00:22:41,119
Speaker 2: of pulling because he needs a piss. And then I

537
00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:42,720
Speaker 2: go out to get my phone, turned my torch on.

538
00:22:43,040 --> 00:22:45,760
Speaker 2: As I turn it on just in time.

539
00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:48,800
Speaker 1: There's a spider hanging from a tree and I'm kid

540
00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:50,439
Speaker 1: you not, it was like the matrix. I was like,

541
00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:53,320
Speaker 1: and it got this fucking close to my face and

542
00:22:53,320 --> 00:22:55,480
Speaker 1: I was like, that's pretty good. And I like fell

543
00:22:55,480 --> 00:22:56,800
Speaker 1: over and scrambled up the stairs.

544
00:22:56,840 --> 00:22:57,840
Speaker 2: Took him all the way up to the top, and

545
00:22:57,840 --> 00:22:59,240
Speaker 2: I was like, I was like shaking.

546
00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:02,320
Speaker 1: And then this morning and then this morning it fucking

547
00:23:02,640 --> 00:23:04,840
Speaker 1: I take Beth to pilates. I took it to.

548
00:23:04,720 --> 00:23:06,320
Speaker 2: Plarties and then came home straight away. I was like,

549
00:23:06,359 --> 00:23:07,560
Speaker 2: I want to get home early. I'll take you to

550
00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:11,720
Speaker 2: put pilates. We get in the car, We're going over

551
00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:13,600
Speaker 2: the Gladesville Bridge. It was like a busy main road

552
00:23:13,640 --> 00:23:15,720
Speaker 2: in Sydney, right and I look over in one of

553
00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:18,480
Speaker 2: the fucking street lights because it's stillretty dark, shines in

554
00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:20,040
Speaker 2: my car and then there's just the.

555
00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:22,960
Speaker 1: Shadow of a fucking huntsman on the inside of my window.

556
00:23:23,040 --> 00:23:24,840
Speaker 1: And I was like, Beth, this one of the inside.

557
00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:26,360
Speaker 1: She's like, it's all good, just chill and just chill,

558
00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:28,520
Speaker 1: and it just starts walking. Oh.

559
00:23:28,560 --> 00:23:30,280
Speaker 2: I dropped her off and I sat outside for five

560
00:23:30,280 --> 00:23:31,359
Speaker 2: minutes trying to kill this thing.

561
00:23:31,520 --> 00:23:35,600
Speaker 3: Talking about crazy like animal insect encounters. I had a

562
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:37,000
Speaker 3: wasp in my car the other day.

563
00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:38,760
Speaker 1: What I want to come over here, come in with

564
00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:39,359
Speaker 1: what we're doing.

565
00:23:40,040 --> 00:23:41,400
Speaker 3: And then I went to get in my car because

566
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:43,080
Speaker 3: it's been really hot around here, so I've been leaving

567
00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:44,760
Speaker 3: my windows down. If I'm going out again, Yeah, I

568
00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 3: don't look it because I have a driveway. One's coming

569
00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:47,160
Speaker 3: in my driveway.

570
00:23:47,480 --> 00:23:48,520
Speaker 1: And then I went to get in my car and

571
00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:50,680
Speaker 1: then there's just some massive wasp man. I freaked out.

572
00:23:50,840 --> 00:23:52,360
Speaker 1: And you know how hard that thing is to get

573
00:23:52,359 --> 00:23:54,640
Speaker 1: out of your car because and if that stings you, yeah,

574
00:23:54,680 --> 00:23:57,920
Speaker 1: but I'm dead, probably could die. I know it was Australia.

575
00:23:57,960 --> 00:24:00,119
Speaker 3: It took me a solid like I reckon five five

576
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:01,600
Speaker 3: minutes to get that thing out of my car. I

577
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:04,000
Speaker 3: was like grabbing a grocery bag, like tryny. I couldn't

578
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:05,600
Speaker 3: grab it because I was in the corner of my windscreen.

579
00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:06,520
Speaker 3: I'm like, I can't touch this thing.

580
00:24:07,080 --> 00:24:08,280
Speaker 2: Did you have bugs ran in your house?

581
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,000
Speaker 1: No? I didn't even think of that. I was in

582
00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:13,600
Speaker 1: the driveway. I was like, I'm gonna go, oh, well,

583
00:24:13,680 --> 00:24:14,159
Speaker 1: fuck me.

584
00:24:14,320 --> 00:24:16,440
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't know how much of a catch

585
00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:16,800
Speaker 2: up that.

586
00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:20,159
Speaker 3: Was talking about insects. I tell you, I'll leave it on.

587
00:24:20,440 --> 00:24:21,800
Speaker 3: One movie's come out.

588
00:24:22,119 --> 00:24:24,199
Speaker 1: Let us know. Did you watch Wallace and Grommitt as

589
00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:27,480
Speaker 1: a kid. Yes, you did. There's a new one out

590
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,080
Speaker 1: just came out on Netflix. What did it take him

591
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:31,840
Speaker 1: that long to make it? It looks sick.

592
00:24:32,080 --> 00:24:34,000
Speaker 3: Actually, if you want a synopsis of that, let me know,

593
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:35,040
Speaker 3: because I'm gonna watch it soon.

594
00:24:35,760 --> 00:24:37,520
Speaker 1: Maybe should we both watch it. I just I just

595
00:24:37,560 --> 00:24:39,560
Speaker 1: got a new TV today too. It came. It came

596
00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:42,840
Speaker 1: seventy inches. It looked good. I'll tell you what. It's

597
00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:44,440
Speaker 1: raining here today and I was waiting for my TV.

598
00:24:44,520 --> 00:24:45,399
Speaker 1: Got a text saying is here.

599
00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:47,040
Speaker 3: I was waiting to for my TV to gum it's

600
00:24:47,040 --> 00:24:48,600
Speaker 3: pissing down rain And then they just walk up my

601
00:24:48,680 --> 00:24:50,399
Speaker 3: driveway and the box is soaked.

602
00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:52,040
Speaker 1: It's big seven to take it out straight away. I

603
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:53,760
Speaker 1: had to take it, but I wasn't planning on doing that,

604
00:24:54,119 --> 00:24:56,119
Speaker 1: big big box. I just fucking took it out of there.

605
00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:57,840
Speaker 1: What did they happen in the back of a ute?

606
00:24:57,920 --> 00:24:59,960
Speaker 1: They missed my driveway and then walked it down the piece.

607
00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:01,960
Speaker 1: I was like, thanks to that. Guys, it's not an

608
00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:13,640
Speaker 1: expensive TV or anything that's weird. Let's get into a day.

609
00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:18,719
Speaker 2: Okay, guys, it is time for a couple of dilemmas

610
00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:20,000
Speaker 2: from the baddies.

611
00:25:20,359 --> 00:25:21,480
Speaker 1: All anonymous, of course.

612
00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:23,200
Speaker 2: If you want to submit one, that'll be in the

613
00:25:23,240 --> 00:25:26,600
Speaker 2: description of this episode, and it's in the link in

614
00:25:26,640 --> 00:25:27,520
Speaker 2: our Instagram bio.

615
00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 1: That's it.

616
00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:30,800
Speaker 2: And yeah, it's all anonymous. Even if you choose not anonymous,

617
00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:32,000
Speaker 2: we still can't see who you are, so.

618
00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:35,160
Speaker 1: Because we are geniuses, fucking genius.

619
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:38,360
Speaker 2: Okay, this one. I don't think we've ever had one

620
00:25:38,480 --> 00:25:42,879
Speaker 2: like this. It's not like super juicy, but it's just tricky, good, okay, tricky.

621
00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:47,040
Speaker 2: How do I stop myself from getting jealous of my boyfriends?

622
00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:48,000
Speaker 1: Sorry?

623
00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:51,879
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, of my boyfriend and his ambitions? Oh okay,

624
00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:55,400
Speaker 2: So my boyfriend and I have been together for eight

625
00:25:55,440 --> 00:25:58,760
Speaker 2: months now. One thing you should know is he's twelve

626
00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:02,240
Speaker 2: years older than me. Recently, he's been traveling to visit

627
00:26:02,320 --> 00:26:04,000
Speaker 2: family and friends.

628
00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:05,120
Speaker 1: Which I love for him.

629
00:26:05,359 --> 00:26:07,440
Speaker 2: He's in a place in his life where he's doing great,

630
00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:10,480
Speaker 2: has money, and can take work off. I, on the

631
00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:13,280
Speaker 2: other hand, have two dogs that I can't leave, a

632
00:26:13,320 --> 00:26:16,000
Speaker 2: low paying job and no money in my savings.

633
00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:16,880
Speaker 1: Classic.

634
00:26:17,040 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 2: I admire him for his hard work and how goal

635
00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:24,080
Speaker 2: oriented he is. Since he's gone on these trips, I've

636
00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:27,159
Speaker 2: caught myself comparing and getting jealous of him having so

637
00:26:27,280 --> 00:26:30,840
Speaker 2: much freedom and money. I have to constantly remind myself

638
00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:35,040
Speaker 2: he has twelve years on me, and yeah, twelve years

639
00:26:35,080 --> 00:26:37,520
Speaker 2: on me. He takes care of me like no one

640
00:26:37,560 --> 00:26:39,879
Speaker 2: else has, and he does try to include me on

641
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:42,760
Speaker 2: future trips. I just can't take the time off work.

642
00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:46,040
Speaker 2: On another note, since he's gone on these trips, he

643
00:26:46,080 --> 00:26:48,520
Speaker 2: will come home and talk about the people he met

644
00:26:48,600 --> 00:26:52,040
Speaker 2: and his friends. He talks so highly of them, saying

645
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:55,720
Speaker 2: things like, quote, he's the smartest guy I've met, or

646
00:26:55,840 --> 00:26:59,080
Speaker 2: quote he has so much going for him, or quote

647
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:00,800
Speaker 2: I thought I knew how to do life.

648
00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:04,960
Speaker 1: Until this trip. I know that sounds weird, but he's

649
00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:07,359
Speaker 1: not into guys. He's just passionate about.

650
00:27:07,080 --> 00:27:10,080
Speaker 2: His hobbies, and these guys he recently met are his heroes.

651
00:27:10,960 --> 00:27:13,199
Speaker 1: I love that he has those kind of people in

652
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:13,679
Speaker 1: his life.

653
00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:16,080
Speaker 2: But on the other hand, I'm jealous because I can't

654
00:27:16,119 --> 00:27:19,400
Speaker 2: imagine him saying those things about me. We discussed it,

655
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:22,640
Speaker 2: and he said that he never talks about those guys

656
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:25,640
Speaker 2: like that to their face, and he's been saying those

657
00:27:25,680 --> 00:27:29,280
Speaker 2: types of things more to me, more to me now.

658
00:27:29,359 --> 00:27:31,800
Speaker 1: But I feel weird because I had to tell him

659
00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:35,679
Speaker 1: and it doesn't feel natural. How do I overcome this jealousy? Ooh,

660
00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:37,600
Speaker 1: this is tricky? So yeah, I just found it hard

661
00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:40,320
Speaker 1: because it's a jealousy thing, and it's like, yeah, she's

662
00:27:40,359 --> 00:27:40,760
Speaker 1: telling us.

663
00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:42,920
Speaker 2: She knows that he's got twelve years of life on her, but.

664
00:27:43,280 --> 00:27:46,480
Speaker 3: Still it's the classic comparison is the thief of joy

665
00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:50,119
Speaker 3: and the grass is always greener. I think it's a

666
00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:54,719
Speaker 3: big mindset thing for her. I think obviously there's got

667
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:57,480
Speaker 3: to be a bit of communication in the relationship and say, boys,

668
00:27:57,520 --> 00:27:59,320
Speaker 3: how you feeling to you boyfriend, because he's probably got

669
00:27:59,320 --> 00:28:03,359
Speaker 3: no idea. Yeah, and the way you phrased it sounded

670
00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:05,359
Speaker 3: like what you're doing is sad.

671
00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:06,880
Speaker 1: Now you're just doing life.

672
00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:10,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, But I think that's her mindset at the moment.

673
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:12,119
Speaker 3: I think you got to switch your mindset and be like, no,

674
00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:15,639
Speaker 3: I'm grinding at the moment. This is like, I'm appreciative

675
00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:17,479
Speaker 3: of what I'm doing. I've got a good job, I've

676
00:28:17,520 --> 00:28:19,760
Speaker 3: got two cool dogs. I'm not making that good money,

677
00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:21,679
Speaker 3: but I will be in five years. Yeah, and like

678
00:28:21,760 --> 00:28:23,879
Speaker 3: switch your mindset a little bit, because it's sort of

679
00:28:23,920 --> 00:28:27,800
Speaker 3: like the why can't my life.

680
00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:29,760
Speaker 1: Be like that kind of mindset? You don't.

681
00:28:29,800 --> 00:28:32,840
Speaker 2: Actually, it seems like she's noticed it. I wouldn't say

682
00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:35,960
Speaker 2: she has a poor me attitude, but it's like if

683
00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:38,600
Speaker 2: you weren't self aware, then it would be poor me.

684
00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:41,080
Speaker 2: Like if you were jealous of him, but you like

685
00:28:41,160 --> 00:28:42,720
Speaker 2: thought it was fine to be jealous of him, that

686
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:43,280
Speaker 2: would be poor me.

687
00:28:43,320 --> 00:28:44,360
Speaker 1: But since yourself awake, I.

688
00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:48,080
Speaker 3: Think, yeah, it's really good that you've like realized why

689
00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:50,520
Speaker 3: you're getting jealous and like you're asking for tips, which

690
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:53,720
Speaker 3: is like the first way to get like feel better. Yeah,

691
00:28:53,760 --> 00:28:55,680
Speaker 3: but I think it's very very tricky, and the fact

692
00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:57,360
Speaker 3: that you sent something in is like the really good

693
00:28:57,400 --> 00:28:59,520
Speaker 3: step to feeling better. But I think it's just appreciating

694
00:29:00,280 --> 00:29:00,840
Speaker 3: the grind.

695
00:29:01,480 --> 00:29:03,719
Speaker 1: I agree. You know what actually is funny.

696
00:29:03,760 --> 00:29:06,800
Speaker 2: I listened to this morning because I drove home from

697
00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:08,960
Speaker 2: Beath this morning. I listened to I haven't listened to

698
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:10,960
Speaker 2: Shits and Gigs for a little while, and I listened

699
00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:13,520
Speaker 2: to an episode and they kind of got semi deep,

700
00:29:13,880 --> 00:29:16,920
Speaker 2: which they don't do. Yeah, and so one of them

701
00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:19,760
Speaker 2: was talking about how one thing he found out last

702
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:21,440
Speaker 2: year that he'd never known his whole life was that

703
00:29:21,840 --> 00:29:25,760
Speaker 2: he doesn't so he doesn't care about what he does,

704
00:29:25,800 --> 00:29:28,240
Speaker 2: and he doesn't care if someone judges him, but he

705
00:29:28,320 --> 00:29:31,760
Speaker 2: really really cares if someone doesn't like him. Someone like

706
00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:34,320
Speaker 2: let's say you like you. Someone could be indifferent and

707
00:29:34,360 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 2: he doesn't care. But if someone is like, oh no,

708
00:29:35,960 --> 00:29:38,840
Speaker 2: I don't like you, that really affects him. And so

709
00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:41,640
Speaker 2: he said he said he never knew that, right, And

710
00:29:41,680 --> 00:29:44,160
Speaker 2: then he was started watching like this how Alex Hall

711
00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:46,600
Speaker 2: Mosey stuff or something like that. He said, he wasn't

712
00:29:46,600 --> 00:29:49,320
Speaker 2: watching it nothing about business. It's more about like so

713
00:29:50,480 --> 00:29:53,160
Speaker 2: there's He had this phrase of I think it's kind

714
00:29:53,160 --> 00:29:54,760
Speaker 2: of just like a roundabout way of saying the grass

715
00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:59,400
Speaker 2: is always greener because you could have all the things

716
00:29:59,480 --> 00:30:03,720
Speaker 2: your boyfriend has and be super unhappy and think back

717
00:30:03,760 --> 00:30:05,480
Speaker 2: to when you didn't have any of that and be like, oh,

718
00:30:05,600 --> 00:30:08,600
Speaker 2: why I was unhappy then because I was comparing myself

719
00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:10,000
Speaker 2: and wanted all that. Now I have all that, and

720
00:30:10,040 --> 00:30:12,440
Speaker 2: I'm not happy now like I wish I was back then.

721
00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:14,760
Speaker 2: I was actually way happier back then. And so it

722
00:30:14,880 --> 00:30:16,800
Speaker 2: is just like a roundabout way. It's like the grass

723
00:30:16,840 --> 00:30:19,240
Speaker 2: is always green and you need to It's almost like

724
00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:21,000
Speaker 2: you just have to go through life.

725
00:30:21,040 --> 00:30:24,520
Speaker 3: I think it's the dilemma. Cender should build her own

726
00:30:24,560 --> 00:30:27,680
Speaker 3: personal goals. Yeah, and like look forward to things in

727
00:30:27,720 --> 00:30:30,080
Speaker 3: your life. I think a big thing I've got lost

728
00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:32,400
Speaker 3: in it before in a relationship is like you're definitely

729
00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:34,200
Speaker 3: a team, don't get me wrong, but you're still too

730
00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:37,080
Speaker 3: individuals and like he's on his journey and just so

731
00:30:37,120 --> 00:30:38,520
Speaker 3: happens that he's twelve years ahead of you.

732
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:39,840
Speaker 2: It's a long time.

733
00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:41,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a long time, and you shouldn't compare at all,

734
00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:44,120
Speaker 3: but you have to put in place things you're looking

735
00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:45,760
Speaker 3: forward to, grind and then at the end of the year,

736
00:30:45,800 --> 00:30:46,840
Speaker 3: take the week off you deserve.

737
00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:49,400
Speaker 2: And honestly, not that we like this word, but I'm sure,

738
00:30:49,440 --> 00:30:50,120
Speaker 2: it motivates you.

739
00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:53,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, and that's taking it back to me.

740
00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:55,360
Speaker 3: That's what I'm doing with my cut at the end

741
00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:56,360
Speaker 3: of it, I'm going to go to a trip for

742
00:30:56,400 --> 00:30:57,600
Speaker 3: Balley because of grinting so much.

743
00:30:57,680 --> 00:30:57,920
Speaker 1: Yeah.

744
00:30:57,920 --> 00:30:59,920
Speaker 3: So when you can with work plan of your boyfriend

745
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,200
Speaker 3: six twelve months in advance and be like, hey, I

746
00:31:02,200 --> 00:31:03,880
Speaker 3: know I'm working, he's and your love and traveling, like,

747
00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:06,360
Speaker 3: let's plan something together or if you need a solo trip,

748
00:31:06,400 --> 00:31:09,000
Speaker 3: like make things that you look forward for in your

749
00:31:09,040 --> 00:31:11,440
Speaker 3: life as well, because it's so easy to get lost

750
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:14,360
Speaker 3: in comparison and then also becoming a team in a relationship.

751
00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:16,840
Speaker 3: It's still like you need to prioritize yourself in the relationship,

752
00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:20,480
Speaker 3: which is easier said than done. But that good point,

753
00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:21,520
Speaker 3: it is easier said than done.

754
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:23,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you see so.

755
00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:25,680
Speaker 3: Many relationships with they become an entity, which you are,

756
00:31:25,760 --> 00:31:27,400
Speaker 3: but you're still your individual self.

757
00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:27,920
Speaker 1: I know.

758
00:31:28,000 --> 00:31:29,280
Speaker 2: It's relationships a tricky.

759
00:31:29,320 --> 00:31:32,360
Speaker 1: Actually, Beth and I are talking about moving in and

760
00:31:32,360 --> 00:31:33,320
Speaker 1: we were talking about.

761
00:31:33,080 --> 00:31:34,600
Speaker 2: A little more in death and I was like, and

762
00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:36,520
Speaker 2: I said, I wanted to say it now because it's

763
00:31:36,520 --> 00:31:37,640
Speaker 2: not going to be for a little while, but like

764
00:31:37,680 --> 00:31:41,720
Speaker 2: we want to do it, and I was thinking, oh,

765
00:31:41,760 --> 00:31:44,240
Speaker 2: I said to her, I was like, I really right now,

766
00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:46,680
Speaker 2: she lives an hour and a half away, and so

767
00:31:46,720 --> 00:31:49,880
Speaker 2: we see each other once twice a week, right, And

768
00:31:49,920 --> 00:31:51,040
Speaker 2: I said to her, I was like, I'm not gonna

769
00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:53,880
Speaker 2: lie the times when I'm at home, I don't think

770
00:31:53,920 --> 00:31:56,560
Speaker 2: I realize how much I enjoy it because you're a

771
00:31:56,560 --> 00:31:58,600
Speaker 2: phone call away, which is great, but also it's like,

772
00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:01,400
Speaker 2: you know, I'm just like by myself, get to watch

773
00:32:01,400 --> 00:32:03,520
Speaker 2: whatever I want to watch, get to work late if

774
00:32:03,520 --> 00:32:04,640
Speaker 2: I want to work late, Like.

775
00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:08,320
Speaker 1: When we're together, I just would like it to.

776
00:32:08,240 --> 00:32:11,000
Speaker 2: Be a thing that we can say when we need

777
00:32:11,040 --> 00:32:13,480
Speaker 2: time alone without it being offensive, Like I want to

778
00:32:13,480 --> 00:32:15,040
Speaker 2: be able to be like, oh, actually I kind of

779
00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:17,000
Speaker 2: a shit day. Not that I don't want to see you,

780
00:32:17,040 --> 00:32:18,480
Speaker 2: but I kind of just want to like actually chill

781
00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:20,360
Speaker 2: and just watch my own show tonight with my own

782
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:21,320
Speaker 2: time for just like an hour.

783
00:32:21,560 --> 00:32:22,680
Speaker 1: We'll like decompress.

784
00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:24,720
Speaker 3: That brings up a good point, taking you back to

785
00:32:24,760 --> 00:32:27,040
Speaker 3: the dilemma as well, setting up boundaries like it's all

786
00:32:27,040 --> 00:32:28,880
Speaker 3: good and well, your boyfriend's going on all these trips,

787
00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:31,840
Speaker 3: but also when he brings back these things, whichever ones

788
00:32:31,880 --> 00:32:34,920
Speaker 3: affect you more like, if you're allowed to feel shit.

789
00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:36,200
Speaker 3: If he comes back and says, that was the best

790
00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:38,560
Speaker 3: trip ever, you should have met blah, you should respect

791
00:32:38,680 --> 00:32:40,280
Speaker 3: I'm so happy you had the best trip ever. But

792
00:32:40,320 --> 00:32:43,680
Speaker 3: maybe just refrain from telling me all the details because

793
00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:45,920
Speaker 3: it makes me feel like, why aren't I doing it?

794
00:32:46,040 --> 00:32:48,320
Speaker 1: That's a good point. Actually, yeah, set the boundaries out,

795
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:51,280
Speaker 1: like fair enough to get jealous because he probably had

796
00:32:51,320 --> 00:32:52,720
Speaker 1: to fucking time of his life.

797
00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:54,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, I bet you he's oblivious because he's just like,

798
00:32:54,520 --> 00:32:55,880
Speaker 3: I got the best trip ever and you're here like,

799
00:32:55,880 --> 00:32:57,440
Speaker 3: oh well, I just look those with my dogs.

800
00:32:57,480 --> 00:32:59,280
Speaker 1: I fuck, I reckon I'd be guilty of that. Yeah,

801
00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:01,840
Speaker 1: they're coming home from Lare. Was like, it was fucking said,

802
00:33:01,960 --> 00:33:05,560
Speaker 1: you should go, you should go. What have you been doing?

803
00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:07,720
Speaker 1: I tell you what, get on a business class fight?

804
00:33:07,920 --> 00:33:12,160
Speaker 1: You should go? Literally literally, but I reckon, you got

805
00:33:12,160 --> 00:33:13,480
Speaker 1: this girl? Yeah? I reckon you got this?

806
00:33:13,560 --> 00:33:17,160
Speaker 3: Alrighty next te Lemma? Am I being insecure? Or is

807
00:33:17,160 --> 00:33:20,520
Speaker 3: he not recognizing how I feel? I've been dating this

808
00:33:20,560 --> 00:33:23,880
Speaker 3: guy for six months now, and we openly talk about.

809
00:33:23,600 --> 00:33:25,200
Speaker 1: Watching porn in our relationship.

810
00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:28,640
Speaker 3: In the early months of our relationship, speaking about it

811
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:30,560
Speaker 3: with him, I came to terms with myself that I

812
00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:32,800
Speaker 3: was no longer going to watch it and felt as

813
00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:35,960
Speaker 3: though it was disrespectful towards him, and I told him this.

814
00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:38,640
Speaker 3: We spoke about it, and we promised not to do

815
00:33:38,720 --> 00:33:42,800
Speaker 3: it again. Weeks later, I had the gut feeling that

816
00:33:42,840 --> 00:33:45,520
Speaker 3: he watched it, so I asked him about it, and

817
00:33:46,040 --> 00:33:47,840
Speaker 3: he did say he broke the promise and he has

818
00:33:47,880 --> 00:33:51,080
Speaker 3: watched it multiple times since we spoke. We spoke about

819
00:33:51,080 --> 00:33:53,400
Speaker 3: this and I told him that I really really didn't

820
00:33:53,440 --> 00:33:54,480
Speaker 3: like the idea of him.

821
00:33:54,320 --> 00:33:55,200
Speaker 1: Watching it at all.

822
00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:57,880
Speaker 3: He confessed and told me that he was addicted to it.

823
00:33:58,400 --> 00:34:00,400
Speaker 3: I said that that's okay, and I would help him

824
00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:02,600
Speaker 3: through it if he wanted to change, which he does.

825
00:34:02,840 --> 00:34:04,600
Speaker 3: He said he wanted to change for me as it's

826
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:08,000
Speaker 3: something I'm not comfortable with. But he's still currently watching

827
00:34:08,000 --> 00:34:10,640
Speaker 3: porn three to four times a week. I feel like

828
00:34:10,680 --> 00:34:12,959
Speaker 3: I'm not doing enough, even though we have sex close

829
00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:15,000
Speaker 3: to every time we see each other, which is probably

830
00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:16,000
Speaker 3: five times a week.

831
00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:18,480
Speaker 1: What do I do? How do I help him through this?

832
00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:21,200
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm being insecure and not doing enough.

833
00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:24,520
Speaker 3: But I just really really feel uncomfortable about the idea

834
00:34:24,560 --> 00:34:26,680
Speaker 3: of him watching it and feel like it's becoming an

835
00:34:26,680 --> 00:34:30,120
Speaker 3: issue since he lied to begin with, Please help. I've

836
00:34:30,120 --> 00:34:32,040
Speaker 3: been listening to you guys since the very start. You've

837
00:34:32,080 --> 00:34:34,160
Speaker 3: both come such a long way. I love watching your journey.

838
00:34:34,239 --> 00:34:38,240
Speaker 1: Keep it up. Thank you. Fuck that's hard, isn't it. Yeah?

839
00:34:38,280 --> 00:34:41,239
Speaker 1: So I mean, like the fact that he promised he

840
00:34:41,280 --> 00:34:43,279
Speaker 1: wouldn't watch it again and then watch it is just like.

841
00:34:43,360 --> 00:34:46,000
Speaker 2: That's the massive topic for me.

842
00:34:46,080 --> 00:34:49,920
Speaker 1: Once may great Mindsseker. Like when I read this to start,

843
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:52,959
Speaker 1: I was thinking, the bigger issue here is he lied

844
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:53,200
Speaker 1: to you.

845
00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:56,839
Speaker 3: And that's a big takeaway from our pod is. I

846
00:34:56,960 --> 00:35:00,200
Speaker 3: like to emphasize being a man of your word. If

847
00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:03,160
Speaker 3: you're going to say you're going to do something, actually

848
00:35:03,200 --> 00:35:06,560
Speaker 3: do it. Like I feel like early on in maybe

849
00:35:06,600 --> 00:35:08,879
Speaker 3: not my relationship, but when I was younger, I used

850
00:35:08,880 --> 00:35:10,279
Speaker 3: to always say what I thought she.

851
00:35:10,280 --> 00:35:13,120
Speaker 1: Wanted to hear. Yeah, I think that's relatable.

852
00:35:13,280 --> 00:35:15,240
Speaker 2: And I can I probably still do that sometimes.

853
00:35:15,360 --> 00:35:17,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, because just as a guy, you just say, oh, yeah,

854
00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:20,320
Speaker 1: I won't watch porn. I won't watch porn, and then yeah.

855
00:35:20,120 --> 00:35:21,319
Speaker 2: You think of it as something that would just be

856
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:22,960
Speaker 2: like if you say I won't watch it, and then

857
00:35:23,000 --> 00:35:24,719
Speaker 2: it's like I'm just gonna watch it still and like.

858
00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:25,520
Speaker 1: I'm just going to hide it.

859
00:35:25,600 --> 00:35:27,799
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's such an easy thing to do. That would

860
00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:29,440
Speaker 3: have been his mindset because he would have seen, like

861
00:35:29,680 --> 00:35:31,719
Speaker 3: you feeling uncomfortable with it and you're like you would

862
00:35:31,920 --> 00:35:33,120
Speaker 3: not want to watch it together, and he would have

863
00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:34,319
Speaker 3: been like, oh, yeah, I'm not going to watch it,

864
00:35:34,600 --> 00:35:35,840
Speaker 3: and like I used to do that when I was

865
00:35:35,880 --> 00:35:37,200
Speaker 3: like eighteen all the time. So I think it's a

866
00:35:37,239 --> 00:35:41,080
Speaker 3: little bit of immaturity. But the problem of porn is

867
00:35:41,080 --> 00:35:43,359
Speaker 3: a recurring theme on the podcast. It seems like, yeah,

868
00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:46,279
Speaker 3: we've spoked about it a bit. Actually, after you say something,

869
00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:48,680
Speaker 3: have something to say, which I think it's very individualized,

870
00:35:48,719 --> 00:35:50,600
Speaker 3: and you've done the perfect thing by voicing how you

871
00:35:50,640 --> 00:35:53,320
Speaker 3: feel and saying you're uncomfortable with it, And.

872
00:35:53,600 --> 00:35:57,479
Speaker 1: The fact that he lied to you is the problem.

873
00:35:57,480 --> 00:35:59,160
Speaker 1: I don't think he's addicted to porn, to say, so

874
00:35:59,280 --> 00:36:01,800
Speaker 1: to speak, as much he says he is, Yeah, I don't.

875
00:36:01,600 --> 00:36:03,400
Speaker 2: Know, unless it's like one of those things where a

876
00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:04,799
Speaker 2: lot of guys will be like, oh, I can't fall

877
00:36:04,840 --> 00:36:05,520
Speaker 2: asleep without.

878
00:36:05,320 --> 00:36:06,640
Speaker 1: A fucking quick one out.

879
00:36:06,680 --> 00:36:09,879
Speaker 3: True, Like, I don't know he's addicted to his individual circumstances,

880
00:36:09,880 --> 00:36:11,600
Speaker 3: but like they're having sex heaps, Like I don't see

881
00:36:11,600 --> 00:36:12,160
Speaker 3: the need.

882
00:36:12,000 --> 00:36:14,279
Speaker 2: To it's not affecting their sex life. I guess that's

883
00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 2: a good way to look at it. That's an optimistic thing.

884
00:36:16,920 --> 00:36:19,120
Speaker 3: M Yeah, And I know it's so hard because we

885
00:36:19,160 --> 00:36:22,799
Speaker 3: keep going dilemmas for girls to understand why guys mas

886
00:36:22,840 --> 00:36:26,839
Speaker 3: debate and it's definitely just want to emphasize, like it's

887
00:36:26,840 --> 00:36:28,640
Speaker 3: not an attack on your looks or anything like that.

888
00:36:28,680 --> 00:36:32,400
Speaker 3: It's a hymn problem, yeah, of like just the sensation

889
00:36:32,520 --> 00:36:35,520
Speaker 3: of orgasming. Yeah, I mean, I don't know if this

890
00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:37,080
Speaker 3: is a rebuttal to that or not, but I was

891
00:36:37,120 --> 00:36:39,160
Speaker 3: just like, as you're reading it, I was thinking, like, okay,

892
00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:44,240
Speaker 3: so as because we're both males, right and.

893
00:36:44,760 --> 00:36:47,839
Speaker 2: Admittedly have both watched like because we have access to it,

894
00:36:47,880 --> 00:36:50,879
Speaker 2: and you know, we were young and we're still pretty young,

895
00:36:51,040 --> 00:36:53,920
Speaker 2: but like have watched probably quite a lot of porn

896
00:36:54,880 --> 00:37:01,120
Speaker 2: between us, so our take on this, Like I don't

897
00:37:01,120 --> 00:37:03,160
Speaker 2: want to say we're the wrong person to ask this,

898
00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:06,400
Speaker 2: but like where we I think I can admit, like

899
00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:10,600
Speaker 2: subconsciously we will try and probably be like hey, like

900
00:37:10,640 --> 00:37:12,160
Speaker 2: we like we say all the time, kind of like

901
00:37:12,200 --> 00:37:13,359
Speaker 2: it's not an attack on you.

902
00:37:13,800 --> 00:37:15,920
Speaker 1: It's not He's not doing it to hurt you. He's

903
00:37:15,960 --> 00:37:16,480
Speaker 1: not doing it.

904
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:18,640
Speaker 2: And it's like, I think you can do something to

905
00:37:18,680 --> 00:37:21,200
Speaker 2: not hurt someone, but it still hurts, Like you could

906
00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:22,759
Speaker 2: cheat on your girlfriend and you're like, I'm not doing

907
00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:24,280
Speaker 2: it to hurt her. I'm doing it to fuck this girl,

908
00:37:24,280 --> 00:37:25,120
Speaker 2: like I'm doing it.

909
00:37:25,000 --> 00:37:26,640
Speaker 1: For me, but it still hurts.

910
00:37:27,239 --> 00:37:29,560
Speaker 2: So it's like I feel like I feel like we

911
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:31,520
Speaker 2: get stuck, both of us guilty of it. It's like

912
00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:35,960
Speaker 2: semi justifying it for the person when like, let's be real,

913
00:37:37,040 --> 00:37:38,240
Speaker 2: Paun's pretty fucked.

914
00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:43,000
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, fuck your mind, it's pretty gnarly, like yeah, yeah.

915
00:37:43,080 --> 00:37:46,680
Speaker 3: I think what I struggle with is because I think

916
00:37:46,719 --> 00:37:49,480
Speaker 3: it's okay in a relationship, which is my belief.

917
00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:51,439
Speaker 2: I think that if both people think it's okay, then yeah.

918
00:37:51,480 --> 00:37:54,560
Speaker 3: But because she's done everything right this dilemma center yeah

919
00:37:54,600 --> 00:37:57,160
Speaker 3: and told her boyfriend voice that she doesn't think it's okay,

920
00:37:57,160 --> 00:37:58,640
Speaker 3: and he lied to it and said they would do it,

921
00:37:59,640 --> 00:38:02,880
Speaker 3: I I just maybe like putting in the steps to

922
00:38:03,280 --> 00:38:05,400
Speaker 3: help him get over it. There's heaps of YouTube tuatorials

923
00:38:05,440 --> 00:38:08,040
Speaker 3: and even TikTok videos how to not get addicted to porn.

924
00:38:08,360 --> 00:38:09,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, I would.

925
00:38:09,239 --> 00:38:09,920
Speaker 1: I don't. I always.

926
00:38:09,920 --> 00:38:12,920
Speaker 2: I don't think you're being insecure, yeah, no question, Yeah, no,

927
00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:13,319
Speaker 2: not at all.

928
00:38:13,600 --> 00:38:15,479
Speaker 3: I don't think you're being I think I think your

929
00:38:15,520 --> 00:38:18,040
Speaker 3: boyfriend has made you feel like you're being insecure by

930
00:38:18,080 --> 00:38:18,720
Speaker 3: watching it again.

931
00:38:18,960 --> 00:38:21,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I reckon you should bring up with him

932
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:23,640
Speaker 1: just playing. Hey, just bringing up the porn thing again.

933
00:38:23,880 --> 00:38:26,080
Speaker 1: I know you said you're addicted, but we can get

934
00:38:26,080 --> 00:38:27,759
Speaker 1: through this together. Like you said, you want to change,

935
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:29,440
Speaker 1: but I think you need a change for yourself, not

936
00:38:29,480 --> 00:38:33,680
Speaker 1: necessarily because I feel uncomfortable. Yeah, Like if you're addicted

937
00:38:34,200 --> 00:38:39,200
Speaker 1: and you recognize it's an addiction, then like being addicted

938
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:40,920
Speaker 1: to something like a pretty froglem. I mean, you know,

939
00:38:40,920 --> 00:38:44,239
Speaker 1: I'm addicted to coffee. But like it's it's like taking accountability.

940
00:38:44,320 --> 00:38:46,360
Speaker 3: Like if he wants to get better once, should we

941
00:38:46,480 --> 00:38:48,160
Speaker 3: get You're not going to fix yourself unless you want

942
00:38:48,160 --> 00:38:49,360
Speaker 3: to do it for yourself, not because he wants to

943
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:50,800
Speaker 3: do it for you, because you're uncomfortable with it. I

944
00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:52,719
Speaker 3: think that's make Yeah, that's why you feel insecure because

945
00:38:52,719 --> 00:38:53,720
Speaker 3: he's like you're the problem.

946
00:38:53,840 --> 00:38:56,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like what's the similar thing, Like I guess, I mean,

947
00:38:56,960 --> 00:39:00,520
Speaker 2: let's just say he like, imagine if he I hate

948
00:39:00,600 --> 00:39:03,400
Speaker 2: using hypotheticals, but imagine if he didn't like you watching

949
00:39:03,440 --> 00:39:04,880
Speaker 2: porn and you said you wouldn't watch porn and you

950
00:39:04,960 --> 00:39:07,839
Speaker 2: kept watching porn, Like you know, I'm also in an

951
00:39:07,880 --> 00:39:12,879
Speaker 2: argument though, Like I'm a big I I've told Beth

952
00:39:12,920 --> 00:39:14,120
Speaker 2: has done it a couple of times, and I've told

953
00:39:14,120 --> 00:39:15,520
Speaker 2: her like I don't like it, and I'll try to

954
00:39:15,560 --> 00:39:16,960
Speaker 2: never do it to her, and she doesn't.

955
00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:17,160
Speaker 1: Do it now.

956
00:39:17,640 --> 00:39:24,280
Speaker 2: But like when someone is trying to justify their feelings

957
00:39:24,280 --> 00:39:27,000
Speaker 2: by saying, I know you'd feel shit if I did

958
00:39:27,000 --> 00:39:29,759
Speaker 2: that to you, unless it was a pretty obvious thing

959
00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:31,200
Speaker 2: of like I did do something dumb and made you

960
00:39:31,239 --> 00:39:31,600
Speaker 2: feel like shit.

961
00:39:31,640 --> 00:39:32,600
Speaker 1: It would make anyone feel shit.

962
00:39:32,640 --> 00:39:34,239
Speaker 2: But if it's like if it's kind of a thing

963
00:39:34,239 --> 00:39:37,920
Speaker 2: that seems like you feel like shit, you're not too

964
00:39:37,960 --> 00:39:40,160
Speaker 2: sure why, and the way you're trying to justify it

965
00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:43,080
Speaker 2: is like, imagine if I did this to you, It's like, no,

966
00:39:43,160 --> 00:39:44,720
Speaker 2: don't tell me how I would feel.

967
00:39:44,920 --> 00:39:47,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm not a big fan of that. I don't

968
00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:49,279
Speaker 1: know if that's like toxic of me or not, but

969
00:39:49,920 --> 00:39:52,399
Speaker 1: I just hate that so much. It's like, don't don't

970
00:39:52,400 --> 00:39:55,439
Speaker 1: try and make me feel like shit to try and

971
00:39:56,719 --> 00:39:58,640
Speaker 1: then yeah, don't be like, imagine if I did that

972
00:39:58,680 --> 00:40:00,399
Speaker 1: to you. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

973
00:40:00,400 --> 00:40:02,200
Speaker 2: I don't know why I've just I've always hated that.

974
00:40:02,440 --> 00:40:04,279
Speaker 3: I don't imagine if I did that to you, And

975
00:40:04,480 --> 00:40:06,480
Speaker 3: I think we don't have that much help for you,

976
00:40:06,520 --> 00:40:07,120
Speaker 3: but I think no.

977
00:40:07,200 --> 00:40:07,640
Speaker 1: I don't.

978
00:40:07,719 --> 00:40:10,640
Speaker 3: The biggest tips are voice that he needs to pick

979
00:40:10,719 --> 00:40:14,000
Speaker 3: up his communication skills with not being a liar yep,

980
00:40:14,080 --> 00:40:17,080
Speaker 3: and then say, if you want to get better, I'm

981
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:18,960
Speaker 3: here to help, but this has to be for you,

982
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:20,880
Speaker 3: not because I feel uncomfortable with it. It's for our

983
00:40:20,920 --> 00:40:24,160
Speaker 3: relationship and you personally. Yeah, I think that's a takeaway

984
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:24,520
Speaker 3: from it.

985
00:40:24,600 --> 00:40:26,240
Speaker 2: I feel like, yeah, it's probably the best advice.

986
00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:27,320
Speaker 1: I bet you.

987
00:40:27,360 --> 00:40:29,839
Speaker 3: He's young and he's like nineteen and just banking a lot,

988
00:40:30,200 --> 00:40:32,640
Speaker 3: like not making an excuse, but he should mature a

989
00:40:32,680 --> 00:40:35,040
Speaker 3: little bit and realize how impactful it is on you

990
00:40:35,080 --> 00:40:36,520
Speaker 3: as a person and your relationship.

991
00:40:36,640 --> 00:40:40,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, like, and also do you think so, I'd say,

992
00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:44,400
Speaker 2: you know, personally, I don't think this is a breakup

993
00:40:44,440 --> 00:40:49,560
Speaker 2: worthy thing, right, But that's because again I don't think

994
00:40:49,600 --> 00:40:50,080
Speaker 2: watching porn.

995
00:40:50,200 --> 00:40:52,120
Speaker 1: I think I think lying is a breakup worthy thing.

996
00:40:52,280 --> 00:40:53,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, fair, fair, fair.

997
00:40:53,920 --> 00:40:55,520
Speaker 1: I think if like, I.

998
00:40:55,440 --> 00:40:57,080
Speaker 3: Wouldn't even give three strukes in your eye, was going

999
00:40:57,120 --> 00:40:58,520
Speaker 3: to give the baseball analogy. But I think if he

1000
00:40:58,560 --> 00:41:00,200
Speaker 3: lies again, I wouldn't have got But I think two

1001
00:41:00,280 --> 00:41:00,919
Speaker 3: lies and you're out.

1002
00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:02,600
Speaker 2: It's hard a And it's just.

1003
00:41:02,719 --> 00:41:06,000
Speaker 3: That's a lying's hard as an individual line. And just

1004
00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:07,840
Speaker 3: make sure you voice that lying is an okay in

1005
00:41:07,840 --> 00:41:08,400
Speaker 3: your relationship.

1006
00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:10,200
Speaker 2: And again, you know what the actually the best bit

1007
00:41:10,200 --> 00:41:12,680
Speaker 2: of advice probably to give. And it's also like like

1008
00:41:12,719 --> 00:41:14,399
Speaker 2: by no means and we'll never tell someone to break

1009
00:41:14,480 --> 00:41:17,360
Speaker 2: up with someone, right, But like, so you think porn

1010
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:20,160
Speaker 2: is disrespectful in a relationship, and you don't watch it

1011
00:41:20,200 --> 00:41:21,080
Speaker 2: to respect your partner.

1012
00:41:21,239 --> 00:41:22,960
Speaker 1: You don't want your partner to watch it to respect you.

1013
00:41:23,120 --> 00:41:26,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, but your partner really likes porn, probably doesn't care

1014
00:41:26,719 --> 00:41:28,799
Speaker 2: to you if you watch porn, right, that doesn't mean

1015
00:41:28,800 --> 00:41:30,239
Speaker 2: he should be allowed to watch porn. But also if

1016
00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:33,040
Speaker 2: you think of it like this, Let's say you started

1017
00:41:33,080 --> 00:41:35,759
Speaker 2: dating someone that was a massive weed smoker and you

1018
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:39,839
Speaker 2: just really disagreed with drugs, you probably wouldn't date that person. No,

1019
00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:42,160
Speaker 2: it's almost like we need to go into relationships these

1020
00:41:42,239 --> 00:41:45,879
Speaker 2: days being like, what's your porn situation, Like, just be honest. Well,

1021
00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:47,839
Speaker 2: I don't want to fall too deep before we get

1022
00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:50,560
Speaker 2: into a point where I'm like, because I don't like porn.

1023
00:41:50,400 --> 00:41:52,400
Speaker 3: I think that brings up a good conversation if be

1024
00:41:52,400 --> 00:41:54,920
Speaker 3: had in a relationship. I think anything around sex is

1025
00:41:54,960 --> 00:41:57,719
Speaker 3: a little bit taboo, and we think it's not a

1026
00:41:57,840 --> 00:41:59,400
Speaker 3: valid reason to break up, like if you have a

1027
00:41:59,400 --> 00:42:01,640
Speaker 3: different sex or if you like porn or you don't

1028
00:42:01,680 --> 00:42:03,920
Speaker 3: like porn, Like yeah, you think like, oh, that's just

1029
00:42:03,960 --> 00:42:05,160
Speaker 3: that's that's not the big deal.

1030
00:42:05,200 --> 00:42:08,320
Speaker 1: When it is, it's fucking huge. Yeah, it's honest.

1031
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:10,960
Speaker 3: It's honestly like someone someone someone likes drugs and someone

1032
00:42:11,080 --> 00:42:13,440
Speaker 3: straighty one eighty. Yeah, like it's the same magnitude.

1033
00:42:13,480 --> 00:42:15,960
Speaker 2: Like the other day, actually I was for this. Beth

1034
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:18,560
Speaker 2: and I were going to do something, and I don't

1035
00:42:18,560 --> 00:42:19,919
Speaker 2: I think we were just talking about how I hadn't

1036
00:42:19,920 --> 00:42:21,560
Speaker 2: had drop out this year, right, it was nearly the

1037
00:42:21,640 --> 00:42:23,080
Speaker 2: end of the last year, and we were talking about

1038
00:42:23,080 --> 00:42:26,040
Speaker 2: how I hadn't had to drop yet, and so I

1039
00:42:26,160 --> 00:42:29,080
Speaker 2: just was jokingly like, oh, if I was a big

1040
00:42:29,120 --> 00:42:31,960
Speaker 2: party boy, that would be like weird for you ay,

1041
00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:33,279
Speaker 2: And she was like, I probably wouldn't be with you,

1042
00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:35,359
Speaker 2: to be honest, because she's like, I know I've been

1043
00:42:35,400 --> 00:42:37,520
Speaker 2: out twice this year, but you know I've only been

1044
00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:41,359
Speaker 2: out twice. Yeah, And and I was like, it's so fair, Like,

1045
00:42:41,560 --> 00:42:44,759
Speaker 2: you know, if Beth was a huge drinker from the

1046
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:46,319
Speaker 2: day I met her, I actual probably wouldn't have been

1047
00:42:46,360 --> 00:42:46,600
Speaker 2: with her.

1048
00:42:46,680 --> 00:42:49,040
Speaker 1: I probably wouldn't have gone on exactly a second dates.

1049
00:42:49,040 --> 00:42:52,359
Speaker 1: But no one says watch your sex drive, like how

1050
00:42:52,440 --> 00:42:53,239
Speaker 1: much porn do you watch?

1051
00:42:53,239 --> 00:42:53,319
Speaker 2: Like?

1052
00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:55,360
Speaker 1: Is that is it about? Should we start to win that?

1053
00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:57,680
Speaker 3: I think it's very valid and it should come out.

1054
00:42:57,719 --> 00:42:59,800
Speaker 3: But I think, yeah, it's so hard as the person

1055
00:43:00,040 --> 00:43:02,080
Speaker 3: you like, oh, he watches heaps of porn, Like that's

1056
00:43:02,080 --> 00:43:05,480
Speaker 3: such a turnoff if you feel and again you feel petty.

1057
00:43:05,600 --> 00:43:07,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, if you if you talk to someone on a

1058
00:43:07,080 --> 00:43:08,440
Speaker 1: first dat and said how much porn do you watch?

1059
00:43:08,440 --> 00:43:10,040
Speaker 1: To be honest, and the person was honest and you

1060
00:43:10,040 --> 00:43:12,160
Speaker 1: were like, eh, there won't be a second date.

1061
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:15,560
Speaker 2: I'm sorry. Yeah, but it's like people would be like, oh,

1062
00:43:15,600 --> 00:43:16,719
Speaker 2: you come on, he can watch porn.

1063
00:43:16,719 --> 00:43:17,120
Speaker 1: Who cares?

1064
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:19,680
Speaker 2: But again, it's like if you you believe, yeah, it's a.

1065
00:43:19,680 --> 00:43:21,279
Speaker 1: Weird ey yeah, die on that hill.

1066
00:43:21,320 --> 00:43:23,480
Speaker 3: I think, Yeah, but there's a couple of good takeaways,

1067
00:43:23,480 --> 00:43:24,560
Speaker 3: but very tricky situation.

1068
00:43:25,160 --> 00:43:27,360
Speaker 1: Hopefully there was a little bit of help, and hopefully

1069
00:43:27,360 --> 00:43:28,919
Speaker 1: I think I just yeah, I don't know. I think

1070
00:43:29,120 --> 00:43:31,040
Speaker 1: maybe talking about this, there's a good chance we might

1071
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:32,560
Speaker 1: not be the best people to ask this question because

1072
00:43:32,560 --> 00:43:34,320
Speaker 1: we're always going to be like, oh want sweet.

1073
00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:36,440
Speaker 3: It'd probably be good to get someone on who is

1074
00:43:36,560 --> 00:43:39,040
Speaker 3: completely like, has the statistics in the mindset of why

1075
00:43:39,120 --> 00:43:40,680
Speaker 3: porn is so bad for you, which I know it is,

1076
00:43:41,320 --> 00:43:43,280
Speaker 3: but we are we're coming from the point of like it's.

1077
00:43:43,120 --> 00:43:44,839
Speaker 2: Okay in a relationship because we think it's okay.

1078
00:43:44,880 --> 00:43:54,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, Okay, Jake, I'm a little bit nervous for

1079
00:43:54,800 --> 00:43:58,399
Speaker 1: this next one. Mate. I have been I can't even

1080
00:43:58,400 --> 00:44:01,120
Speaker 1: I have been itching out my skin foot like it's

1081
00:44:01,120 --> 00:44:02,760
Speaker 1: been weeks. It's been weeks.

1082
00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:03,960
Speaker 2: To ask you how this went.

1083
00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:08,520
Speaker 3: I went to therapy for the first time ever in

1084
00:44:08,560 --> 00:44:11,080
Speaker 3: your life, ever in my life, and I have documented

1085
00:44:11,120 --> 00:44:15,160
Speaker 3: the experience and okay, I'm going to call this my

1086
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:16,879
Speaker 3: experience in therapy Part one.

1087
00:44:17,040 --> 00:44:18,759
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

1088
00:44:18,840 --> 00:44:22,279
Speaker 3: So just before Christmas, we always talk about on the

1089
00:44:22,280 --> 00:44:25,279
Speaker 3: pod how therapy would be such a good option for

1090
00:44:25,440 --> 00:44:28,360
Speaker 3: couples or dilemmas or anything like that. And for me,

1091
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:31,200
Speaker 3: I found it really hard to justify giving that advice

1092
00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:34,000
Speaker 3: because I've never been and I never had like a

1093
00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:36,239
Speaker 3: foot to stand on, Like it's so good to say,

1094
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:38,680
Speaker 3: go to therapy, but it's such a daunting thing and

1095
00:44:38,760 --> 00:44:41,160
Speaker 3: it's such a big ass yes, And I've always thought

1096
00:44:41,200 --> 00:44:43,279
Speaker 3: to myself, I want to go, and I sort of

1097
00:44:43,400 --> 00:44:46,600
Speaker 3: wanted to. I sort of want to start normalizing going

1098
00:44:46,600 --> 00:44:49,920
Speaker 3: to therapy when you're fine or you're okay. I think

1099
00:44:49,920 --> 00:44:52,759
Speaker 3: there's a stigma behind going to therapy when something bad

1100
00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:54,000
Speaker 3: is going on in your life, and I want to

1101
00:44:54,080 --> 00:44:57,719
Speaker 3: use it as a tool to like any other thing

1102
00:44:57,760 --> 00:44:59,480
Speaker 3: you do with your body or or your mind.

1103
00:44:59,680 --> 00:45:02,359
Speaker 1: Yep, use it as a tool to get better. Well.

1104
00:45:02,400 --> 00:45:04,040
Speaker 2: I mean, apparently the best time to go is when

1105
00:45:04,040 --> 00:45:05,359
Speaker 2: you feel like you don't need it, because it gives

1106
00:45:05,360 --> 00:45:06,960
Speaker 2: you the tools for when you do need it.

1107
00:45:07,120 --> 00:45:09,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah exactly, and you can actually take in

1108
00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:13,920
Speaker 3: everything you're learning when you're in a semi somewhat good place.

1109
00:45:14,560 --> 00:45:22,439
Speaker 3: So I took the accountability and booked therapy. I went

1110
00:45:22,480 --> 00:45:26,720
Speaker 3: to a local therapist around me and person in person,

1111
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:29,319
Speaker 3: which was very daunting and it's quite hard to get in,

1112
00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:33,279
Speaker 3: so I was a little bit limited on the therapists. Yes,

1113
00:45:33,640 --> 00:45:38,560
Speaker 3: I found a psychotherapist which is also technically a counselor, okay,

1114
00:45:38,880 --> 00:45:42,960
Speaker 3: which is also cheaper than a clinical psychiatrist or psychologist.

1115
00:45:43,280 --> 00:45:44,439
Speaker 1: That good both of them.

1116
00:45:44,680 --> 00:45:48,399
Speaker 3: And I also wanted to say one also daunting thing

1117
00:45:48,640 --> 00:45:50,880
Speaker 3: or one reason you might not go to therapy is

1118
00:45:50,920 --> 00:45:51,800
Speaker 3: because it's expensive.

1119
00:45:51,880 --> 00:45:53,440
Speaker 1: Yea, yeah, yeah. How much was this?

1120
00:45:54,520 --> 00:45:57,680
Speaker 3: So a psychotherapist, which is a counselor was one hundred

1121
00:45:57,920 --> 00:46:00,320
Speaker 3: everyone's difference cheap, but cheaper for a counselor was hundred

1122
00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:02,200
Speaker 3: and twenty five dollars for the hour, but it gets

1123
00:46:02,280 --> 00:46:03,920
Speaker 3: up to like one hundred and eighty five hundred, two

1124
00:46:03,960 --> 00:46:08,040
Speaker 3: hundred bucks for an actual clinical psychologist or psychiatristow and

1125
00:46:08,040 --> 00:46:09,480
Speaker 3: one of them can diagnose drugs and.

1126
00:46:09,400 --> 00:46:10,120
Speaker 1: One of them can't.

1127
00:46:10,280 --> 00:46:13,280
Speaker 3: But okay, okay, what you can do is I didn't

1128
00:46:13,280 --> 00:46:14,719
Speaker 3: have like the time or didn't know about it. You

1129
00:46:14,800 --> 00:46:16,880
Speaker 3: can go see your GP and get on a mental

1130
00:46:16,920 --> 00:46:19,680
Speaker 3: health plan mental health treatment plan, and they give you

1131
00:46:19,719 --> 00:46:21,000
Speaker 3: tell them what's going on in your life, and they

1132
00:46:21,040 --> 00:46:25,000
Speaker 3: give you ten subsidized if this is in Australia, subsidized

1133
00:46:25,080 --> 00:46:29,680
Speaker 3: psychology visits and you get about give or take eighty

1134
00:46:29,719 --> 00:46:32,520
Speaker 3: seven dollars off. Wow, which is a lot if you're

1135
00:46:32,760 --> 00:46:35,560
Speaker 3: Medicare in Australia. Yes, which so Earlie is pretty good

1136
00:46:35,600 --> 00:46:37,759
Speaker 3: for that, So anyone healthcare system is pretty good.

1137
00:46:37,840 --> 00:46:40,640
Speaker 1: Yeah. Oh wait, it's eighty seven dollars per session.

1138
00:46:40,760 --> 00:46:41,560
Speaker 2: Oh that's even more.

1139
00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:42,160
Speaker 1: That's hectic.

1140
00:46:42,320 --> 00:46:44,319
Speaker 3: That's less this because if it's one hundred and thirty five,

1141
00:46:44,320 --> 00:46:45,120
Speaker 3: it would be eighty seven.

1142
00:46:45,560 --> 00:46:47,919
Speaker 2: Oh okay, okay, okay, that's all right. Still yeah, yeah,

1143
00:46:48,160 --> 00:46:49,200
Speaker 2: und one hundred bucks for a secon.

1144
00:46:49,200 --> 00:46:50,719
Speaker 3: So if you really want to go, go see a

1145
00:46:50,760 --> 00:46:54,359
Speaker 3: GPEP and you can then get ten healthcare plans and

1146
00:46:54,400 --> 00:46:56,239
Speaker 3: you can get a bit subsidized, which is good about

1147
00:46:56,239 --> 00:46:58,279
Speaker 3: being in Australia because it is very expensive and I

1148
00:46:58,360 --> 00:46:59,640
Speaker 3: understand a lot of people can't afford that.

1149
00:46:59,640 --> 00:47:01,759
Speaker 2: Even if you're life's great going and pretend like something,

1150
00:47:01,880 --> 00:47:05,080
Speaker 2: just tell you to pretend. Oh so you can say

1151
00:47:05,200 --> 00:47:07,359
Speaker 2: everything's fine, but I want a mental health plan?

1152
00:47:07,440 --> 00:47:08,319
Speaker 1: Yeah really, well.

1153
00:47:08,239 --> 00:47:09,520
Speaker 3: I don't know if you'd say it like that, but

1154
00:47:09,760 --> 00:47:11,520
Speaker 3: I think I want to talk to someone about the

1155
00:47:11,560 --> 00:47:12,479
Speaker 3: things going on in my life.

1156
00:47:12,920 --> 00:47:14,880
Speaker 1: I like that. Yeah, which is GP's not going to

1157
00:47:14,960 --> 00:47:17,080
Speaker 1: question it, No, no, no, no, you could. He would

1158
00:47:17,120 --> 00:47:19,560
Speaker 1: know that you can use as a tool. But my experience,

1159
00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:22,279
Speaker 1: what I've done is I've got a voice message of

1160
00:47:22,360 --> 00:47:28,080
Speaker 1: before and after. Let's let's play it before and then

1161
00:47:28,160 --> 00:47:30,320
Speaker 1: talk about it. Then I'll play the after. Okay, okay, okay,

1162
00:47:30,400 --> 00:47:33,479
Speaker 1: So here we go. Alrighty, So I'm out the front

1163
00:47:33,480 --> 00:47:35,279
Speaker 1: of the therapist and that's a bit of a tongue

1164
00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:38,799
Speaker 1: tw his stuff front of the therapist and not gonna lie.

1165
00:47:38,800 --> 00:47:43,000
Speaker 1: I'm pretty nervous. My appointment's in like thirteen minutes. Ah,

1166
00:47:43,160 --> 00:47:46,799
Speaker 1: And I was driving here feeling all right, mad overthinking,

1167
00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:49,840
Speaker 1: but less nervous than I thought I was going to

1168
00:47:49,880 --> 00:47:52,239
Speaker 1: be Yesterday. I was dreading and I was like, what

1169
00:47:52,360 --> 00:47:53,440
Speaker 1: did I do this to myself?

1170
00:47:53,680 --> 00:47:56,640
Speaker 3: And I just had to keep telling myself, like do

1171
00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:59,200
Speaker 3: things that you don't want to do and you experience

1172
00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:01,520
Speaker 3: growth and hope this will be a really good thing

1173
00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:04,880
Speaker 3: for me and my mental state and game plan going in.

1174
00:48:04,920 --> 00:48:06,799
Speaker 3: I kind of wanted to go in with no game

1175
00:48:06,840 --> 00:48:09,560
Speaker 3: plan and be just completely open minded, just.

1176
00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:11,239
Speaker 1: Because I overthink so much.

1177
00:48:11,239 --> 00:48:12,799
Speaker 3: I'm like, I could plan everything I'm going to talk

1178
00:48:12,840 --> 00:48:15,000
Speaker 3: about in there, but I really want to see, just

1179
00:48:15,040 --> 00:48:18,760
Speaker 3: like what the experience is like, which should be interesting.

1180
00:48:18,880 --> 00:48:22,120
Speaker 1: I'm seeing a male, which is interesting. I know I

1181
00:48:22,120 --> 00:48:23,800
Speaker 1: sit on the pod. I'd prefer to see a female,

1182
00:48:23,880 --> 00:48:26,640
Speaker 1: but I think it'd be good. Just I don't know.

1183
00:48:27,040 --> 00:48:30,040
Speaker 3: I'm the thing that's keeping me confident or like making

1184
00:48:30,080 --> 00:48:31,719
Speaker 3: me feel like I'm okay is because I talk to

1185
00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:34,040
Speaker 3: Jake for an hour every single week, so that's kind

1186
00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:36,480
Speaker 3: of like a therapist in a way, a therapy session.

1187
00:48:38,120 --> 00:48:43,879
Speaker 1: But yeah, so overall, feeling probably nerves seven out of ten.

1188
00:48:44,640 --> 00:48:48,279
Speaker 1: And I don't know what to say. I'm going a

1189
00:48:48,280 --> 00:48:50,000
Speaker 1: bit of a red face, but we'll see how we

1190
00:48:50,080 --> 00:48:52,400
Speaker 1: go and I'll see how I feel after. Alrighty, so

1191
00:48:52,400 --> 00:48:56,200
Speaker 1: I was low key shitting it. Yeah, and oh, I

1192
00:48:56,200 --> 00:48:57,440
Speaker 1: don't know, I got really nervous.

1193
00:48:57,440 --> 00:48:58,600
Speaker 3: And when I walked through the front door, I was

1194
00:48:58,600 --> 00:49:01,640
Speaker 3: sitting in the very very very peaceful in there could

1195
00:49:01,680 --> 00:49:04,240
Speaker 3: be mistaken for a massage therapist, like it was given

1196
00:49:04,239 --> 00:49:09,280
Speaker 3: that vibe. And I don't know why I was so nervous.

1197
00:49:09,280 --> 00:49:11,120
Speaker 3: I think there was just like I think, fair enough,

1198
00:49:11,120 --> 00:49:15,640
Speaker 3: this stigma around therapy just made me really really nervous.

1199
00:49:15,680 --> 00:49:19,239
Speaker 3: But as soon as I met my therapist and sat

1200
00:49:19,320 --> 00:49:22,040
Speaker 3: down with him, I felt really comfortable. Obviously they're trying

1201
00:49:22,080 --> 00:49:23,560
Speaker 3: to do that. And I did notice one of his tips.

1202
00:49:23,600 --> 00:49:25,440
Speaker 3: He asked me about all my tattoos. So I was like,

1203
00:49:25,480 --> 00:49:26,239
Speaker 3: easy to talk about.

1204
00:49:27,080 --> 00:49:30,480
Speaker 1: Oh, that's crazy. He was playing my game straight away.

1205
00:49:30,480 --> 00:49:34,520
Speaker 1: I was like, I know that, TI, I'll tell you anyway.

1206
00:49:34,760 --> 00:49:36,640
Speaker 1: He's like, this is really cool tatoos like I wouldn't

1207
00:49:36,880 --> 00:49:38,800
Speaker 1: mean anything, and I was like, I know what you're doing.

1208
00:49:39,440 --> 00:49:40,719
Speaker 1: You're in my brain already.

1209
00:49:42,040 --> 00:49:43,520
Speaker 3: So I got this guy was very young, and he

1210
00:49:43,600 --> 00:49:46,200
Speaker 3: was so nice, and I felt so comfortable straight away.

1211
00:49:47,120 --> 00:49:50,080
Speaker 3: And I'll play my voice message of how I felt after,

1212
00:49:50,480 --> 00:49:51,880
Speaker 3: and then I think we'll talk about it because I

1213
00:49:52,000 --> 00:49:53,399
Speaker 3: kind of explained my experience in there.

1214
00:49:53,480 --> 00:49:56,319
Speaker 1: Okay, I can go on more detail. So here is

1215
00:49:56,360 --> 00:49:56,880
Speaker 1: the after.

1216
00:49:57,719 --> 00:50:03,440
Speaker 3: Okay, we are done, and where I thoroughly enjoyed that.

1217
00:50:04,360 --> 00:50:07,480
Speaker 3: I'm going to run you through my thinking when I

1218
00:50:07,520 --> 00:50:10,680
Speaker 3: was in the four yer, pretty nervous, not gonna lie.

1219
00:50:11,080 --> 00:50:12,520
Speaker 1: One thing I picked up on was there was a

1220
00:50:12,560 --> 00:50:13,959
Speaker 1: lot of lint chocolates when.

1221
00:50:13,880 --> 00:50:15,440
Speaker 3: They were giving him. You know in Christmas how they

1222
00:50:15,440 --> 00:50:18,640
Speaker 3: give away like little cheap lollies. The psychologists give away

1223
00:50:18,680 --> 00:50:21,880
Speaker 3: linch chocolates. You know they're doing good but I was

1224
00:50:21,920 --> 00:50:27,640
Speaker 3: really nervous. Had met my therapist, absolutely beautiful man, lovely guy,

1225
00:50:27,840 --> 00:50:31,279
Speaker 3: and felt very in a very safe environment to talk

1226
00:50:31,320 --> 00:50:35,640
Speaker 3: about my feelings and open up. And we got into it,

1227
00:50:35,680 --> 00:50:39,120
Speaker 3: and I got a brief rundown of what he specializes in,

1228
00:50:39,239 --> 00:50:42,799
Speaker 3: which was narrative psychology, and he was a counselor, not

1229
00:50:42,840 --> 00:50:47,280
Speaker 3: a clinical psychologist, and he specializes in figuring out where

1230
00:50:47,880 --> 00:50:49,960
Speaker 3: a problem is coming from where you might not be

1231
00:50:50,040 --> 00:50:53,160
Speaker 3: able to see, which was very cool and interesting, and

1232
00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:55,960
Speaker 3: we just got to know each other. He let me

1233
00:50:55,960 --> 00:50:58,399
Speaker 3: know about himself and then I let him know about

1234
00:50:58,400 --> 00:51:00,680
Speaker 3: myself where my head's at the main thing we talked

1235
00:51:00,719 --> 00:51:04,040
Speaker 3: about was burnout and why I feel like I'm burning out,

1236
00:51:04,600 --> 00:51:08,160
Speaker 3: which was very interesting. And one of the tools he

1237
00:51:08,320 --> 00:51:10,800
Speaker 3: used to do that was he's not gonna give you

1238
00:51:10,840 --> 00:51:13,319
Speaker 3: the answers. He's trying to, like see if you can

1239
00:51:13,480 --> 00:51:16,000
Speaker 3: voice them yourself, sort of like what me and Jake

1240
00:51:16,040 --> 00:51:18,320
Speaker 3: do on the pod. You don't know, not necessarily something

1241
00:51:18,560 --> 00:51:20,080
Speaker 3: a problem going on in your life, but you don't

1242
00:51:20,080 --> 00:51:22,400
Speaker 3: know when something a really good moment's gonna happen on

1243
00:51:22,400 --> 00:51:25,000
Speaker 3: the pod that's really funny, or we have some stimulating

1244
00:51:25,040 --> 00:51:28,000
Speaker 3: conversation because of each other's responses, and he did the

1245
00:51:28,000 --> 00:51:29,960
Speaker 3: same thing, and I figured out a little bit of

1246
00:51:30,040 --> 00:51:33,799
Speaker 3: why I might be burning out or why one of

1247
00:51:33,840 --> 00:51:36,480
Speaker 3: my problems is I can't shut off. That was really

1248
00:51:36,520 --> 00:51:40,960
Speaker 3: really interesting, and time flew by hour did not feel

1249
00:51:40,960 --> 00:51:43,319
Speaker 3: long enough, but I wanted to come into this as

1250
00:51:43,320 --> 00:51:47,160
Speaker 3: a standing point of similar go back to a gym analogy,

1251
00:51:47,239 --> 00:51:49,840
Speaker 3: like a boy like, You're not gonna Jake said this

1252
00:51:49,840 --> 00:51:51,759
Speaker 3: to the other day and it resonated with me. You're

1253
00:51:51,800 --> 00:51:54,400
Speaker 3: not gonna get fit or get ripped over night, are.

1254
00:51:54,400 --> 00:51:57,080
Speaker 3: You've gotta consistently show up time after time. And I

1255
00:51:57,160 --> 00:51:59,440
Speaker 3: think once a month is a really good tool.

1256
00:51:59,640 --> 00:52:02,240
Speaker 1: And yeah, okay. So I was just driving home reflecting

1257
00:52:02,239 --> 00:52:06,040
Speaker 1: on the therapy session and I guess the best takeaway

1258
00:52:06,080 --> 00:52:09,399
Speaker 1: from it for what therapy is like is, Jake, You're

1259
00:52:09,400 --> 00:52:13,279
Speaker 1: gonna like this one. The key is always going to

1260
00:52:13,320 --> 00:52:18,560
Speaker 1: be in the beholder, meaning the answers are within yourself.

1261
00:52:19,080 --> 00:52:20,600
Speaker 1: Is very poetic.

1262
00:52:21,080 --> 00:52:24,279
Speaker 3: And what a therapist does, I think he does for

1263
00:52:24,360 --> 00:52:29,080
Speaker 3: me anyway, is allows so if there's a key hole

1264
00:52:29,320 --> 00:52:31,359
Speaker 3: for what the answer is, he makes that key hole

1265
00:52:31,480 --> 00:52:33,960
Speaker 3: just that little bit bigger so you can find it easier.

1266
00:52:35,200 --> 00:52:39,000
Speaker 3: And I think that is the best tool of a therapist.

1267
00:52:39,600 --> 00:52:41,800
Speaker 1: Makes you see what's.

1268
00:52:41,600 --> 00:52:45,440
Speaker 3: Going on and potentially reveal something that was unable to

1269
00:52:45,440 --> 00:52:49,000
Speaker 3: be seen, and he makes that fix be able to

1270
00:52:49,000 --> 00:52:50,320
Speaker 3: be seen a little bit easier.

1271
00:52:51,400 --> 00:52:52,600
Speaker 1: That is sick.

1272
00:52:53,120 --> 00:52:56,240
Speaker 3: So this is my personal experience in therapy, and everyone's

1273
00:52:56,280 --> 00:52:59,239
Speaker 3: going to be different. Yeah, but overall, I think it

1274
00:52:59,280 --> 00:53:03,200
Speaker 3: was a very worthwhile experience. And I'll tell you what

1275
00:53:03,360 --> 00:53:07,040
Speaker 3: was nice was every conversation you have with a person

1276
00:53:07,160 --> 00:53:10,440
Speaker 3: like even us on the podcast. You obviously I talk

1277
00:53:10,480 --> 00:53:13,480
Speaker 3: about myself, then I listened to you, and then the

1278
00:53:13,520 --> 00:53:16,040
Speaker 3: conversation flows about your life, then my life. It was

1279
00:53:16,120 --> 00:53:19,920
Speaker 3: really nice to be selfish and talk about yourself for

1280
00:53:20,120 --> 00:53:20,880
Speaker 3: like an hour.

1281
00:53:21,640 --> 00:53:22,320
Speaker 1: Good point.

1282
00:53:22,400 --> 00:53:25,480
Speaker 3: It was really nice because obviously any normal person, anyone

1283
00:53:25,560 --> 00:53:27,640
Speaker 3: who has like a good self awareness, he's going to

1284
00:53:27,840 --> 00:53:30,120
Speaker 3: talk in like for that to take turns.

1285
00:53:30,200 --> 00:53:32,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, it takes turns about your personal life.

1286
00:53:32,239 --> 00:53:33,879
Speaker 3: But it was really nice to go in there and

1287
00:53:33,920 --> 00:53:37,479
Speaker 3: just be like, so this is me, and he asked

1288
00:53:37,480 --> 00:53:41,560
Speaker 3: some really interesting questions about my personal life, and he

1289
00:53:42,200 --> 00:53:45,160
Speaker 3: like says, tell me if I step too far or

1290
00:53:45,160 --> 00:53:45,839
Speaker 3: anything like that.

1291
00:53:46,400 --> 00:53:47,239
Speaker 1: And it was really nice.

1292
00:53:47,280 --> 00:53:50,360
Speaker 3: And a couple of things take away. I appreciated. You

1293
00:53:50,400 --> 00:53:53,440
Speaker 3: don't really sit down and think. It's like forces you

1294
00:53:53,480 --> 00:53:55,640
Speaker 3: to think about things going on in your life. And

1295
00:53:55,920 --> 00:53:58,959
Speaker 3: I know I've told you, but it came out, he said,

1296
00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:01,560
Speaker 3: it not me, how important and appreciative I am of

1297
00:54:01,600 --> 00:54:06,600
Speaker 3: your relationship for us, and also my girlfriend, how appreciative

1298
00:54:06,640 --> 00:54:08,319
Speaker 3: and how much I love her. It came out, which

1299
00:54:08,320 --> 00:54:10,080
Speaker 3: I obviously know I love her, but it was nice

1300
00:54:10,120 --> 00:54:11,520
Speaker 3: to like I had.

1301
00:54:11,360 --> 00:54:12,799
Speaker 1: To describe the way I loved her.

1302
00:54:13,280 --> 00:54:14,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, And it was really nice to think in a

1303
00:54:14,960 --> 00:54:16,879
Speaker 3: way of someone else asking the questions and it'd all

1304
00:54:16,880 --> 00:54:19,919
Speaker 3: be about me. And it really felt like a weight

1305
00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:21,839
Speaker 3: was lifted off my shoulder walking out of there, And

1306
00:54:22,640 --> 00:54:26,200
Speaker 3: looking back on it now, it's sort of doesn't comprehend

1307
00:54:26,239 --> 00:54:28,719
Speaker 3: why I was so nervous because he was so simple.

1308
00:54:28,440 --> 00:54:30,160
Speaker 1: Going in there and talking to a guy. Yeah, it

1309
00:54:30,239 --> 00:54:31,879
Speaker 1: was like the most normal thing.

1310
00:54:32,280 --> 00:54:34,240
Speaker 3: It's like, what did you expect was going to happen? Yeah,

1311
00:54:34,320 --> 00:54:37,800
Speaker 3: But for some reason it's so daunting. And I've booked

1312
00:54:37,840 --> 00:54:39,040
Speaker 3: in again. I'm going to go once a.

1313
00:54:38,960 --> 00:54:42,000
Speaker 1: Month, likeing. Oh yeah, and I actually I got lucky

1314
00:54:42,040 --> 00:54:44,520
Speaker 1: and I'd really like him. Yeah, I liked him. I

1315
00:54:44,560 --> 00:54:44,839
Speaker 1: like him.

1316
00:54:44,880 --> 00:54:46,600
Speaker 3: It was a really good bloke and it was good

1317
00:54:46,640 --> 00:54:48,280
Speaker 3: because he was somewhat young. I think it was maybe

1318
00:54:48,280 --> 00:54:50,840
Speaker 3: mid thirties and he's been a counselor in school, so

1319
00:54:50,840 --> 00:54:52,759
Speaker 3: he sort of like knew what a kid was like

1320
00:54:52,800 --> 00:54:57,160
Speaker 3: and stuff. Mate, And yeah, I would highly recommend, especially

1321
00:54:57,160 --> 00:54:58,480
Speaker 3: if you're in a good point or a bad point

1322
00:54:58,520 --> 00:54:58,919
Speaker 3: in your life.

1323
00:54:58,960 --> 00:55:02,200
Speaker 1: And it may be very daunting. But after it, like

1324
00:55:02,280 --> 00:55:05,359
Speaker 1: I felt really good. Fuck, I'm proud of you. Thanks.

1325
00:55:05,400 --> 00:55:07,480
Speaker 1: You should be proud of yourself. I'll tell you what.

1326
00:55:07,640 --> 00:55:10,319
Speaker 3: But before, like two or three days out, I was like,

1327
00:55:10,320 --> 00:55:11,200
Speaker 3: why the fuck did I do this?

1328
00:55:11,239 --> 00:55:13,480
Speaker 1: Or you're an idiot? Like really, I was like, I

1329
00:55:13,560 --> 00:55:15,000
Speaker 1: sort of this is a good thing about the pot.

1330
00:55:15,040 --> 00:55:17,880
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm doing it for content. I know.

1331
00:55:17,920 --> 00:55:19,720
Speaker 2: I know it shouldn't be like you're doing it for yourself,

1332
00:55:19,760 --> 00:55:20,080
Speaker 2: but you are.

1333
00:55:20,360 --> 00:55:22,600
Speaker 3: There was content that made me do it even more

1334
00:55:22,600 --> 00:55:24,480
Speaker 3: and I was like after it, I was like, you're

1335
00:55:24,480 --> 00:55:26,560
Speaker 3: an idioty that was so simple and so good for you.

1336
00:55:26,640 --> 00:55:29,040
Speaker 3: And like I walked out of it and I was like, oh.

1337
00:55:29,200 --> 00:55:32,319
Speaker 1: Good, got I felt it felt rewarding going wow. Yeah,

1338
00:55:32,360 --> 00:55:33,720
Speaker 1: And it was a good experience.

1339
00:55:33,440 --> 00:55:35,600
Speaker 2: And so you rated going in person.

1340
00:55:36,160 --> 00:55:38,600
Speaker 3: I thoroughly enjoyed person. But I like doing like we

1341
00:55:38,640 --> 00:55:40,000
Speaker 3: don't have guests on the pot, like we could have

1342
00:55:40,000 --> 00:55:42,799
Speaker 3: heaps of zoom. I like seeing what the person's like. Yes,

1343
00:55:43,680 --> 00:55:45,040
Speaker 3: I really liked that. I didn't want to go on

1344
00:55:45,120 --> 00:55:46,920
Speaker 3: zoom with some person and be in my room and

1345
00:55:46,920 --> 00:55:49,759
Speaker 3: be comfortable. Okay, well that's my experience, but like some people,

1346
00:55:50,160 --> 00:55:52,080
Speaker 3: some people might be more comfortable on zoom because it's

1347
00:55:52,120 --> 00:55:52,640
Speaker 3: less daunting.

1348
00:55:52,719 --> 00:55:55,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, like maybe out in your I listened to someone

1349
00:55:55,960 --> 00:55:59,040
Speaker 2: talk about it and they said they did do better help,

1350
00:55:59,040 --> 00:56:01,200
Speaker 2: which is online. Yeah, and they said that they didn't

1351
00:56:01,200 --> 00:56:03,279
Speaker 2: want to be in their comfortable space, so they went

1352
00:56:03,360 --> 00:56:04,080
Speaker 2: and did it in their car.

1353
00:56:04,280 --> 00:56:04,680
Speaker 1: Oh fair.

1354
00:56:04,760 --> 00:56:06,040
Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, it's actually not about it.

1355
00:56:06,239 --> 00:56:08,880
Speaker 1: Online's good too for busy people because it does you

1356
00:56:08,960 --> 00:56:10,160
Speaker 1: I had to drive there. It takes a bit of

1357
00:56:10,239 --> 00:56:12,919
Speaker 1: your time, like it takes obviously a bit longer.

1358
00:56:13,040 --> 00:56:15,160
Speaker 2: Oh shit, man, you should definitely be very proud of

1359
00:56:15,200 --> 00:56:16,600
Speaker 2: yourself once a month. That's pretty sick.

1360
00:56:16,640 --> 00:56:18,160
Speaker 3: So that that's going to be a little bit of

1361
00:56:18,160 --> 00:56:20,920
Speaker 3: a new series on the pod is like recapping my

1362
00:56:21,080 --> 00:56:24,680
Speaker 3: tips I've learned for from therapy yep so therapy Part one,

1363
00:56:24,680 --> 00:56:27,000
Speaker 3: Part two, Part three, and also I also wanted to

1364
00:56:27,040 --> 00:56:28,920
Speaker 3: go there for like a standing point in the future

1365
00:56:28,920 --> 00:56:33,680
Speaker 3: because I'm good now and God forbid something happens in

1366
00:56:33,680 --> 00:56:37,239
Speaker 3: my life or my relationship. But I want to have

1367
00:56:37,280 --> 00:56:40,919
Speaker 3: a standing point for what therapy is like, so when

1368
00:56:40,920 --> 00:56:43,279
Speaker 3: I am bad, I don't have the daunting side of

1369
00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:46,480
Speaker 3: going to therapy for the first time and my relationships

1370
00:56:46,480 --> 00:56:50,000
Speaker 3: crumbling and I'm something bad is happening in my life.

1371
00:56:50,000 --> 00:56:52,200
Speaker 3: So I want to sort this out now and so

1372
00:56:52,280 --> 00:56:54,240
Speaker 3: I can deal with those problems better in the future.

1373
00:56:54,400 --> 00:56:58,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, would you have mindset? Good mindset? Yeah? And yeah,

1374
00:56:59,000 --> 00:57:00,600
Speaker 1: that was my experience in there. Mate.

1375
00:57:01,120 --> 00:57:05,279
Speaker 2: Fuck maybe end of twenty twenty five, I might don't.

1376
00:57:05,320 --> 00:57:08,680
Speaker 3: Don't don't don't feel pressured too, because I did, and

1377
00:57:08,960 --> 00:57:12,919
Speaker 3: that's my very individualized personal experience. But I think it's good,

1378
00:57:13,000 --> 00:57:15,520
Speaker 3: especially for men as well, because it's such a big

1379
00:57:15,560 --> 00:57:17,400
Speaker 3: stigma around men not being able to talk.

1380
00:57:17,280 --> 00:57:18,080
Speaker 1: About their feelings.

1381
00:57:18,080 --> 00:57:19,960
Speaker 3: Like I sat down and talked to a man I've

1382
00:57:20,000 --> 00:57:22,680
Speaker 3: never met before about the things going on in my life. Yeah,

1383
00:57:22,800 --> 00:57:24,480
Speaker 3: and I think we need normalize that a bit more

1384
00:57:24,480 --> 00:57:27,160
Speaker 3: and being like it's okay to not be okay or

1385
00:57:27,360 --> 00:57:29,120
Speaker 3: voice when you're sad as a man.

1386
00:57:29,480 --> 00:57:32,280
Speaker 2: Shit bro just proud. That's so sick.

1387
00:57:32,400 --> 00:57:32,880
Speaker 1: Thanks man.

1388
00:57:32,920 --> 00:57:35,280
Speaker 2: Thanks, Well that's it guys. Thanks for being a baddie.

1389
00:57:35,320 --> 00:57:40,200
Speaker 1: Thanks for being a baddi. We'll see you next time. Bye.