Speaker 1: Get a Yong get a. I hope you're having a
Speaker 1: great day.
Speaker 2: Get a get a.
Speaker 1: It's mal Monty. Hello everyone, anyway, thank you for listening
Speaker 1: to all of you.
Speaker 2: Mal Monty.
Speaker 1: So it's been going around for a while, but the
Speaker 1: ninety shit where it's on Instagram a lot. Anyway, I
Speaker 1: hadn't even seen this. And the other day I announced
Speaker 1: to Sam because I always do, I'm like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: because I don't pooh off and I'm like, I've got
Speaker 1: a pooh.
Speaker 2: I've got a pooh.
Speaker 1: And I said to him, I'm going to deliberately leave
Speaker 1: my phone here and just not do anything. And I
Speaker 1: sat down and I was like, this is wild. I
Speaker 1: have not not taken my phone to the toilet in
Speaker 1: so long. And then I got off and I was like,
Speaker 1: I just did a shit like from the nineties, and
Speaker 1: then all of a sudden it was everywhere.
Speaker 2: Let me ask you, So, when you were in the toilet,
Speaker 2: did you pick up anything like?
Speaker 1: No, I did anything at all. I didn't read the
Speaker 1: I didn't read the back of labels and stuff like that.
Speaker 2: Nah.
Speaker 1: I definitely tried to get in and out a lot
Speaker 1: quicker than I would usually.
Speaker 2: You know, what could be a good strategy. There is
Speaker 2: that if you didn't take your phone into the toilet
Speaker 2: with you, right, because I would assume that most people do,
Speaker 2: even though it's revolting. Whatever most people do.
Speaker 1: For revolting, we do.
Speaker 2: I wonder if you took those moments to actually try
Speaker 2: and meditate or something.
Speaker 1: Just something nasty about meditating while you're excreeting.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I mean, I can't even meditate, but
Speaker 2: I'm just saying like that thought of I don't know,
Speaker 2: like a mindfulness practice or something.
Speaker 1: He's gonna do that. Nice idea, but no chance. But
Speaker 1: there is lots of people talking about doing ninety shits
Speaker 1: right now. Also, why don't you do like a guided
Speaker 1: meditation or something, because my mind, this is how this
Speaker 1: is how bad it is. You know, transcendental meditation, and
Speaker 1: they say do the course, they give you your own
Speaker 1: specific mantrab whatever.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've done it. I'm not going to go pay
Speaker 2: two grand to do that. So I found online years ago,
Speaker 2: like this list of mantras in accordance to the ear
Speaker 2: you're born or whatever. So I started to try and
Speaker 2: do it. I will make a fucking word out of anything.
Speaker 2: And then once I've made a word out of it.
Speaker 2: Then I start thinking about what that word means or whatever,
Speaker 2: and it'll take me into some scenario. My mind is
Speaker 2: never quiet ever, I can't, but it's not.
Speaker 1: That's the whole thing about it is. It doesn't have
Speaker 1: to it doesn't have to be completely still. But it's
Speaker 1: like if you notice that your mind has gone, then
Speaker 1: you say your mantra and it brings you back. And
Speaker 1: some meditations. Literally you might say it one hundred times.
Speaker 1: Other times you might say it twelve. You know what
Speaker 1: I mean.
Speaker 2: Look, I know it's good for you. I'd love my
Speaker 2: kids to be able to start doing it from now.
Speaker 2: But I'm just like a lot of the time too,
Speaker 2: I'm just constantly consumed with all the other shit I
Speaker 2: should be doing.
Speaker 1: I know that's why you need it more than anyone,
Speaker 1: I reckon, But I found meditation Mountain is what I'm
Speaker 1: doing at the ROT because I have like ten fifteen
Speaker 1: twenty minute while. You've got to find a voice that
Speaker 1: you like. Yes, but it might be like for stress relief,
Speaker 1: or it might be like a body scan or just
Speaker 1: I don't know, And I don't listen to all the words.
Speaker 1: I drift off constantly and think but then all bring
Speaker 1: me back and I also will go you have just
Speaker 1: laid and been like, I'll consciously breathe for that time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and every night I used to do a meditation ten
Speaker 1: minute meditation with backs a yoga nidra is really good
Speaker 1: too because it's a body scan way. But he doesn't
Speaker 1: want to do it anymore, so we just put on
Speaker 1: this song that is like no sound or anything like that.
Speaker 1: It's quite meditative because I'm like, no, you need to
Speaker 1: have something.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think maybe sometimes with meditation too, for
Speaker 2: myself or whatever, it's like you're expecting something to happen,
Speaker 2: like you're expecting something magical to happen. Yes, I guess
Speaker 2: you don't get into that deep state until you practice
Speaker 2: enough or whatever.
Speaker 1: Well it's a cumulative as well, yeah, exactly. It's kind
Speaker 1: of like if you do it once, it's not going
Speaker 1: to do anything for you anyway.
Speaker 2: Well, you know, maybe I'll give that a go. But
Speaker 2: speaking of the the Pooh people are doing this thing
Speaker 2: raw dogging on flights. So you go on an aeroplane
Speaker 2: and you were not allowed to have any stimulation around
Speaker 2: you at all, So no phone, no book, no magazine,
Speaker 2: no earphones nothing. You just got to sit there, sit
Speaker 2: there and do nothing.
Speaker 1: And can you pull out the flight thing in front
Speaker 1: of you and you're.
Speaker 2: Meant to not read anything, You're not to take in anything.
Speaker 2: You just have to sit and do nothing. Now like
Speaker 2: people are having like psychological breakdown, I bet they are,
Speaker 2: which I reckon I would too. I can't think of
Speaker 2: anything worse than that. But I was thinking about that
Speaker 2: and all the things that we used to raw dog
Speaker 2: that we didn't know we were raw dogging at the time.
Speaker 1: Raw dogging is having sex with no with no condom.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, So is this just saying like it's just
Speaker 1: you completely Well.
Speaker 2: I guess all those things like having a phone on
Speaker 2: you all the time and stuff in some way is
Speaker 2: like a form of protection. Really Yeah, no, yes, yeah.
Speaker 2: I thought some things that we used to raw dog
Speaker 2: in the day, and the things they taught us, like
Speaker 2: patients physically lining up at Ticke Tech to buy concert
Speaker 2: tickets or going to take further Remember bass, Oh my god,
Speaker 2: it was like I think it was even before Ticke
Speaker 2: Tech it was called bass. And if there was a
Speaker 2: concert you wanted to go to, you physically had to
Speaker 2: go there with your body and wait in line.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, I don't remember bass, but I totally remember
Speaker 1: lining up at ticketech.
Speaker 2: Jesus creativity. How many different ways can you make an
Speaker 2: ashtray for your mum, even if she's a non smoker,
Speaker 2: for Mother's Day? How many different ash trays can you
Speaker 2: make in pottery?
Speaker 1: Oh god, that was great though, wasn't it. And then
Speaker 1: you'd wrap it up in like a grain sellar, always.
Speaker 2: With the ribbon with us, yes, along the ribbon to curl.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, god, so good research skills. How about
Speaker 2: if you needed a service, or you needed to find
Speaker 2: someone's phone number, you had to look in the Yellow
Speaker 2: Pages or the White Pages.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. We were saying this the other day.
Speaker 1: We were telling the kids about the White Pages and
Speaker 1: Yellow Pages because I, when I was a kid, was
Speaker 1: obsessed with the Essendon Bombers, the AFL team, and I
Speaker 1: got the White Pages, looked up the name Lloyd and
Speaker 1: called Matthew Lloyd's house. He went to school with Mark,
Speaker 1: did he anyway? I saw his very first game on
Speaker 1: that It was on my birthday, so on the eighth
Speaker 1: of July. I don't know what year. This sounds psychotic,
Speaker 1: And I became obsessed with him, of course, and so
Speaker 1: I remember looking up Lloyd Essendon and then calling up
Speaker 1: and speaking to his dad.
Speaker 2: I mean, doesn't that seem completely wild? The people's phone
Speaker 2: numbers and addresses, addresses everyone, how fancy you were if
Speaker 2: you had a private number. Why she got a private number?
Speaker 2: You have a private number?
Speaker 1: I can't believe the addresses were in there as well.
Speaker 2: I mean, you're pretty safe if your surname was Psmith
Speaker 2: or something, but if you had a different surname.
Speaker 1: Wow, they were so thick.
Speaker 2: I know, but you know, stuff like compromise when you're
Speaker 2: at the video shop with your siblings. Oh, six weeklies
Speaker 2: for six bucks, you get to, I get to.
Speaker 1: The weeklies were always so shit. But then you'd get
Speaker 1: there a bit late on a Friday afternoon and all
Speaker 1: of the new releases had those tags on them.
Speaker 2: Sorry, I'm out.
Speaker 1: Oh god, so frustrating.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 1: We're talking about how kids also don't know, like recording shows.
Speaker 1: Remember it'd be like, don't record over round the twist,
Speaker 1: and you'd have your tape with the VHS with the
Speaker 1: sticker at the front. Do not tape over round the twist, Yeah.
Speaker 2: Do not tape over? Oh my god. And then someone
Speaker 2: always taped over something significant there was. It was a
Speaker 2: funny meme out ages ago, and it was just a
Speaker 2: bunch of like VHS tapes or whatever, and it just said,
Speaker 2: it's like roulette, what's it going to be your kid's
Speaker 2: fifth birthday party? Or a porno. It's just put it
Speaker 2: in and see what it is. Oh my god, that
Speaker 2: was funny. Yeah, but yeah, I think they've got to
Speaker 2: start start raw dogging some other.
Speaker 1: Dogging in life more.
Speaker 2: My kids can't raw dog well, I know, but you
Speaker 2: know we our parents raw dogged their own shit before,
Speaker 2: you know, and they thought we were really.
Speaker 1: Exactly every generation thinks the next generations completely fucked. Do
Speaker 1: you know what my son's got obsessed with his whittling,
Speaker 1: as in like with wood with wooden knives. Yeah, obsessed.
Speaker 1: Both of them are obsessed, and I've just had to
Speaker 1: completely let it go. I don't watch them. They've got
Speaker 1: these little like knives that we got from the camping
Speaker 1: outdoors thing, and they like, you can lock them in
Speaker 1: close the knife halfway down and lock it in. But
Speaker 1: they're so obsessed with them. They just stand out in
Speaker 1: the backyard whistling for ages. It's the best thing ever
Speaker 1: but the other day, I'm like, oh, Alo's gone to
Speaker 1: a friend's house, and Bax is like, where's my knife?
Speaker 1: Alo had fucking taken the knives to a kid's house.
Speaker 1: And I was out at lunch and Backs is calling me, going,
Speaker 1: where's knife? Where's my knife? And I said to Sam,
Speaker 1: I reckon Alos taking them. I'm gonna have to message
Speaker 1: the dad. And Sam's like, how do you message the
Speaker 1: dad and ask if how son's got knives there?
Speaker 2: So I just left it.
Speaker 1: And then when he got home, I'm like, did you
Speaker 1: take knives? You can't take the knives against.
Speaker 2: My brother in high school got caught with a knife
Speaker 2: in his bag. He was like, oh no, why pocket
Speaker 2: knife or whatever. And when he got home, mom and
Speaker 2: dad were like, right, why was that knife in there?
Speaker 2: He said, idiot, just in case I needed to cut
Speaker 2: an apple or something. There's no knives at school, so
Speaker 2: I needed that. I reckon. My mum was half way
Speaker 2: to believing that, like, actually, great idea. Good on you
Speaker 2: for eating the fruit.
Speaker 1: You know what, I would have thought your brother was
Speaker 1: back in the day a mad walk.
Speaker 2: No, Na, he wasn't. He wasn't. Actually don't know why
Speaker 2: he did it. He never got bullied at any point,
Speaker 2: so I'm not sure why he did. But he wasn't
Speaker 2: that kide right. It wasn't like we were walking around
Speaker 2: gone looks good at chose as Mario or whatever.
Speaker 1: Like.
Speaker 2: It wasn't like.
Speaker 1: I remember when I was in high school, this group
Speaker 1: of people, young younger kids came to the school wielding machettes.
Speaker 2: We had the same thing. Machetes were a real thing
Speaker 2: back then, wasn't it. Baxter wants a machete. He wants
Speaker 2: to say, for a machete. I said, that's a step
Speaker 2: too far, mate, that's a step too far, because you
Speaker 2: can cut shit.
Speaker 1: Pretty good with a machete, but I might. No. He's like,
Speaker 1: can I please get like they're like twenty four dollars,
Speaker 1: And I said, there's no way you're getting a machete.
Speaker 1: But I vividly remember being at school and an announcement
Speaker 1: coming over everybody, please get you to your home rooms
Speaker 1: straight away. Moved straight away to your home rooms, and
Speaker 1: then just looking at the window being terrified but also exhilarated.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, because it was something different. It was
Speaker 2: like the epic.
Speaker 1: Version of a dog being left out in the school,
Speaker 1: Like a dog running around the school.
Speaker 2: That used to scare me if there was a dog
Speaker 2: on the loose, and oh.
Speaker 1: I loved a dog and loose and someone would always
Speaker 1: own it, like somebody some kid would find it and
Speaker 1: they'd grab their collar and other kids come out and
Speaker 1: be like, no, no, I'm taking it to the office.
Speaker 1: So I'm taking it to the office.
Speaker 2: Oh, I wouldn't have wanted to have touched it because
Speaker 2: I would have assumed even though I don't think we
Speaker 2: have it in this country. I remember everyone get rabies. Yeah,
Speaker 2: for dog bites you.
Speaker 1: That's I'm terrified of the dogs in balley because I'm
Speaker 1: sure that I'm gonna get rabies if it bribes me.
Speaker 2: None, I'm like stray dogs. No way.
Speaker 1: Okay, I got a question for you.
Speaker 2: Shoot.
Speaker 1: So my friend Kerrie went away with her family, right
Speaker 1: and she was laying by the pool. This is a
Speaker 1: club Bintang. Have you a bin tang? It's in like
Speaker 1: you go to Singapore and then you I've seen a
Speaker 1: few people have.
Speaker 2: Been there lately.
Speaker 1: Anyway, I'm so desperate to go to a club med
Speaker 1: because they're just so epic for kids. But she was
Speaker 1: laying by the pool, okay, on a day bed yeah.
Speaker 1: Next to her is a lady who has her a
Speaker 1: podcast playing but without headphones on, so really annoying. I
Speaker 1: would be annoyed.
Speaker 2: I would be annoyed.
Speaker 1: But what would you do in that situation?
Speaker 2: I would be so annoyed, and I'd probably do a
Speaker 2: few or whatever. I wouldn't say anything. And then if
Speaker 2: she said, oh, sorry, is this annoying you, I'd say no,
Speaker 2: it's fine, it's fine, and then I'd bitch about it later.
Speaker 2: That's exactly what I do if I'm being honest. Although
Speaker 2: if you got me on a real shitty day, yeah,
Speaker 2: maybe I'd say no. I wouldn't. It doesn't matter how shitty.
Speaker 1: Any I wouldn't carry goes excuse me? She did, would
Speaker 1: you mind putting on headphones?
Speaker 2: Good on your cares and shed.
Speaker 1: Me from there? And I said you did not, and
Speaker 1: she said I did. I said you should have got
Speaker 1: up and gone somewhere else. I just don't think you can.
Speaker 1: It's the entitlement of that woman is infuriating. It's the
Speaker 1: same as people talking on their loud speakers like it's
Speaker 1: so rude.
Speaker 2: But also, if.
Speaker 1: You're laying down and you've really nestled in for a
Speaker 1: good laze about. That is so I get how irritating
Speaker 1: that is for Kerry, but just then have the guts
Speaker 1: and the audacity to say, can you put your headphones in?
Speaker 1: And then you've both got to lay there. Oh, I
Speaker 1: couldn't do it.
Speaker 2: That's what we're all climbing towards, isn't it. Yeah, that's
Speaker 2: the dream. You know what. Another thing she could have
Speaker 2: done was start playing music through her really loud.
Speaker 1: Imagine that is so passive aggressive, isn't.
Speaker 2: I imagine the woman then said, excuse me, could you
Speaker 2: please turn your music down or turn your music off?
Speaker 2: And she could have said, sure, when you turn your
Speaker 2: podcast off, I'll do that.
Speaker 1: Isn't it? Like just some people are so bloody rich
Speaker 1: with what with their entitlement, aren't they. We've got friends
Speaker 1: who have got like this. They've got a holiday house.
Speaker 1: But it sounds fancy, but it's not. It's like just
Speaker 1: a kind of a sheddy, sheddy kind of thing anyway,
Speaker 1: because they're not there all the time, and their neighbors
Speaker 1: live there. Their neighbors just park in their driveway whenever
Speaker 1: they want, so they'll get down there and their cars
Speaker 1: are parked in the driveway, So then they have to
Speaker 1: go and knock on the door and be like, can
Speaker 1: you please move your cars? And they never apologize. They're
Speaker 1: just like, oh yeah, sorry, no, no, sorry, there's no
Speaker 1: story there. Oh yeah, we had people over last night.
Speaker 1: Yet we'll move them. And on top of that, they
Speaker 1: use their bins all the time, so they'll often get
Speaker 1: down there and their bins are full.
Speaker 2: But hold on.
Speaker 1: It gets worse. One time, not long ago, because they
Speaker 1: get a water bill. My friends, the bill spiked so
Speaker 1: hectically that he's like, oh my god, there's something's burst
Speaker 1: down there. So he quickly goes down there and checks
Speaker 1: and realizes they've got a pool, a new pool. So
Speaker 1: they've clearly climbed over the fence and hooked up the
Speaker 1: hose to their outdoor water system and have used their
Speaker 1: water to fill their pool.
Speaker 2: They had to have said something about it put camera.
Speaker 2: They had to have said something about that.
Speaker 1: But he said, there's no proof, there's no proof. Sorry,
Speaker 1: I can't And I said, what would you do in
Speaker 1: that situation when I saw them, I'd go, how's the
Speaker 1: water in your pool going? I'd say something like that.
Speaker 2: I get that, you wouldn't like, No one wants to
Speaker 2: have warring neighbors. No, but that is fucked.
Speaker 1: Isn't that head that is? And he said, then they
Speaker 1: were there one like they were there one time, and
Speaker 1: they still use their bin. See, he said, they're so
Speaker 1: used to just using our stuff that even when they
Speaker 1: know where they're they're still putting stuff in our bin.
Speaker 2: Oh, they definitely need to get a camera up there.
Speaker 1: They've got cameras now.
Speaker 2: You know the other thing that really pisces me off,
Speaker 2: right is that say what kez, did you know? Like
Speaker 2: there's that label then that like, oh you know, oh
Speaker 2: that person's a Karen. It used to shit me because
Speaker 2: I'm like, no, no, no, But Karen is the entitled person.
Speaker 2: Being assertive about something is not being a Karen. Feeling
Speaker 2: like you're entitled to say and do things, doesn't matter
Speaker 2: how much that inconvenience is other people. That's a Karen.
Speaker 2: That's totally a Karen spewing. If your name's Karen, now,
Speaker 2: aren't you really? One of my best friend's name is
Speaker 2: Karen kazar bet she gets. I used to call all
Speaker 2: my barbies Karen. I loved that name.
Speaker 1: Did you did you want to be a Karen?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I would. I wanted to be anything but Melissa.
Speaker 2: I like Melissa. I don't think you really do.
Speaker 1: I don't mind it. It's not intensive. I wouldn't call
Speaker 1: any I wouldn't call my kid Melissa, but it's not
Speaker 1: one that I'd go like if my name was Melissa,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't care, you know.
Speaker 2: I think it was last week or something, it came
Speaker 2: out that this couple had called their daughter, I'll spell
Speaker 2: it for you a double N a L y Anna
Speaker 2: Lee Annie Annalie. But it looks like anally a written down.
Speaker 2: I know there's the double N, but whatever, it looks
Speaker 2: like that, And I'm like, at what point do you
Speaker 2: not say, hmm, maybe we'll spell it like Anna lee
Speaker 2: or something, because can you imagine what that kid's going
Speaker 2: to go through at school.
Speaker 1: It's like when Amy Schumer called her her kid Jeane
Speaker 1: and their last name is a Tah and she didn't
Speaker 1: realize genatal Gennatal, No.
Speaker 2: That was the middle name. The middle name was a
Speaker 2: tal or whatever, and the middle name, you know, asking
Speaker 2: everyone at school what your middle name was, and then
Speaker 2: someone always had like a weird one and they never
Speaker 2: wanted to say that was.
Speaker 1: Me because mine was Maureen, which is my NaN's name so,
Speaker 1: but it was also always very old. Yeah, like Maureen
Speaker 1: Katie Mareen is like what's yours?
Speaker 2: And the top three of that era louils Anne and
Speaker 2: Jane has.
Speaker 1: Jane's my sister's middle name. But I told you how
Speaker 1: I didn't have a name for a week, right, I
Speaker 1: didn't have a name for a week, and then I
Speaker 1: get Katie. It's like, what the fuck?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've told you. Mark went three months with no
Speaker 2: name until legally they had to love three months. I've
Speaker 2: said this before, and his name.
Speaker 1: Is I'm not remember I was going to be a
Speaker 1: Mark if I was a boy. Even with the sea
Speaker 1: it's a sea cooler. Well, I don't know, it's a
Speaker 1: bit different. At least there was a bit more thought
Speaker 1: in that Mark. I just don't get it.
Speaker 2: Oh, it's so good.
Speaker 1: All right, we're getting out of here. Everyone. Thank you
Speaker 1: so much for listening. I hope you're well and we
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