WEBVTT - A Sad, Pre-Surgery Sit Down With Bec (Part 3) 0:00:00.360 --> 0:00:03.080 Hello, and welcome back to the Maspuny Podcast and part 0:00:03.160 --> 0:00:07.280 three of this little investigation series here in Bali. In 0:00:07.320 --> 0:00:09.479 this episode, you're gonna hear me sit down we Beck 0:00:09.600 --> 0:00:14.560 prior to her undergoing this rib recontouring procedure. You will 0:00:14.560 --> 0:00:18.360 hear me repeatedly ask her just why are you doing this? 0:00:18.440 --> 0:00:21.360 And you'll also hear me midway through. I suppose have 0:00:21.480 --> 0:00:26.840 this continual internal battle of like being yes, I am 0:00:26.880 --> 0:00:29.639 here in this country to document this trip and what 0:00:29.840 --> 0:00:33.800 is happening, whilst yes, sharing my opinion on it all, 0:00:33.840 --> 0:00:36.879 but also as I sat with Beck, I just realized 0:00:36.920 --> 0:00:39.839 more than ever I am also someone here in this 0:00:39.880 --> 0:00:43.919 country amongst this who just doesn't want her to. 0:00:43.920 --> 0:00:49.760 Get this done. Hi, Beck, Hi, Josh, back on the podcast. 0:00:49.960 --> 0:00:50.680 Back on the pod. 0:00:50.720 --> 0:00:53.640 Baby, Now I must point out tomorrow is your surgery. 0:00:53.760 --> 0:00:55.880 You You've arrived with a vape and a glass of wine, 0:00:55.960 --> 0:00:59.040 two things that are not really permitted pre surgery. 0:00:59.280 --> 0:01:03.960 Hello, this is half veno half soda water. It's just one. 0:01:04.240 --> 0:01:07.000 It's not really doing the rumors very well that you 0:01:07.080 --> 0:01:08.679 may have an issue. 0:01:08.840 --> 0:01:11.280 I'm on holiday, I have an issue? 0:01:11.280 --> 0:01:11.440 Off? 0:01:11.440 --> 0:01:11.920 Fuck off? 0:01:12.120 --> 0:01:12.959 Is this a holiday? 0:01:13.440 --> 0:01:15.000 Absolutely? You're joking. 0:01:15.720 --> 0:01:17.600 Seven days in one of the best hotels in the 0:01:17.600 --> 0:01:19.800 world and free cosmetic surgery. 0:01:19.959 --> 0:01:21.000 This is a holiday for me. 0:01:24.160 --> 0:01:27.959 I suppose we've had a lot of backlash or yeah. 0:01:28.640 --> 0:01:30.520 Usually i'd say you, but I've been dragged into it. 0:01:30.600 --> 0:01:31.080 It's fair. 0:01:31.160 --> 0:01:37.319 I knew documenting this would be controversial. You're doing a job, though, Josh, Yeah. 0:01:37.360 --> 0:01:39.880 I mean, I'm a journalist and Cole take opinions. But 0:01:39.920 --> 0:01:41.800 for me, like the thing that's different now to when 0:01:41.800 --> 0:01:43.800 I used to do surgery stuff for the magazines years 0:01:43.800 --> 0:01:46.640 ago is when you're a journalist, you can't really have 0:01:46.680 --> 0:01:50.360 an opinion or a voice. You just write, whereas now 0:01:50.560 --> 0:01:53.160 is like a creator. You know, I've said to you 0:01:53.240 --> 0:01:55.040 about twenty times in the last twenty four hours, why 0:01:55.040 --> 0:01:55.600 are you doing this? 0:01:56.720 --> 0:01:59.200 Yes, you have and every opportunity you get. 0:01:59.760 --> 0:02:01.720 Yeah, and I'm still letting you come back out if 0:02:01.720 --> 0:02:02.240 you want. 0:02:02.800 --> 0:02:04.640 Not backing out, no, I. 0:02:04.600 --> 0:02:09.160 Think, well tell me why are you here to have 0:02:09.200 --> 0:02:11.000 your ribs recontored? 0:02:12.080 --> 0:02:14.440 Get contouring of the ribs, So first and foremost we're 0:02:14.480 --> 0:02:18.080 not getting ribs removed, that's not a thing. They're contoured. 0:02:18.160 --> 0:02:21.120 So it's essentially vis and VISI line for your ribs. 0:02:21.120 --> 0:02:23.160 So people get their teeth done. Anyone that wants to 0:02:23.160 --> 0:02:25.440 do my teeth, I'm in the running for that two place. 0:02:25.480 --> 0:02:29.880 Every hook me up. You know, we've all talked about 0:02:29.880 --> 0:02:33.440 the weight I've lost and whatnot, and you know, I 0:02:33.440 --> 0:02:35.200 I'm happy to do anything like this will be my 0:02:35.200 --> 0:02:38.560 third cosmetic procedure and this won't be my last. 0:02:38.800 --> 0:02:42.000 So but did you actually want these things? Are you're 0:02:42.000 --> 0:02:43.079 just doing it for the sake of it? 0:02:43.639 --> 0:02:43.720 No? 0:02:44.480 --> 0:02:46.120 Well, look, I didn't think about it. 0:02:46.160 --> 0:02:48.160 I've always looked at my body and thought, okay, so 0:02:48.280 --> 0:02:51.560 I've got I'm a part of the itty bitty titty committee, right. 0:02:51.960 --> 0:02:54.799 I have tiny boobs, they're not really any boobs, right, 0:02:54.919 --> 0:02:57.680 and I don't have a bum. And so when I 0:02:57.720 --> 0:02:59.600 look at myself in the mirror, I've got a little 0:02:59.639 --> 0:03:02.520 bit of a shit shape. But I will eventually get 0:03:02.520 --> 0:03:05.560 my boobs done. But I don't want massive kahunas, right, 0:03:06.120 --> 0:03:09.120 But in order to get that sort of hour glass 0:03:09.160 --> 0:03:12.239 looking figure, you would need to have your bum done 0:03:12.320 --> 0:03:16.040 and your boobs done massive to have this. 0:03:15.160 --> 0:03:17.840 This figure right. And so when it when when it 0:03:17.880 --> 0:03:18.440 came to me. 0:03:18.440 --> 0:03:21.040 I consulted a number of people, doctors and whatnot, and said, 0:03:21.160 --> 0:03:25.120 is this is this feasible. All it works, It is safe, yep. 0:03:25.639 --> 0:03:28.600 And you know, I had some serious discussions with people 0:03:28.639 --> 0:03:31.200 and they were like, look, it's it's not invasive. It's 0:03:31.200 --> 0:03:38.280 a bloodless it's a bloodless procedure and it works. And 0:03:38.440 --> 0:03:41.200 so I thought about it and I thought. 0:03:41.480 --> 0:03:43.720 Yeah, I want this done as much as I sat 0:03:43.760 --> 0:03:46.760 there with back listening and thinking like, sure, everything you're 0:03:46.800 --> 0:03:51.240 saying is valid. And again, it is your body, and 0:03:51.360 --> 0:03:54.040 in all of our own heads we have these visions, 0:03:54.080 --> 0:03:55.840 you know, of how we would love to look if 0:03:55.880 --> 0:03:59.440 we could. But but just as we continue to chat, 0:03:59.480 --> 0:04:02.480 I question her more and more like, is that the 0:04:02.600 --> 0:04:05.000 sole reason you're doing this? Or is this just partly 0:04:05.680 --> 0:04:07.760 because of the virality. You know, it's going to bring 0:04:07.800 --> 0:04:11.680 the controversy and the dopamine hit you're going to get 0:04:11.680 --> 0:04:17.320 from that. But I feel you no offense. Maybe do 0:04:17.440 --> 0:04:19.880 things for the plot because last time we spoke, you 0:04:19.880 --> 0:04:24.680 had fallen in love with it hadn't fallen in You 0:04:24.720 --> 0:04:26.719 were falling in love with a male Lescot And we 0:04:26.800 --> 0:04:29.159 did a whole chat where you were questioning could you 0:04:29.240 --> 0:04:32.360 pursue a relationship with a man whose job is having 0:04:32.400 --> 0:04:36.120 sex with of a women? And you were genuinely like 0:04:36.720 --> 0:04:38.680 you thought you could because you like this man so much. 0:04:39.240 --> 0:04:42.120 And that was maybe seven weeks ago. You've not You've 0:04:42.120 --> 0:04:45.200 not mentioned this guy once in what two days in Ballet. 0:04:45.240 --> 0:04:48.480 I haven't mentioned him once in in Bali yet, So 0:04:48.560 --> 0:04:49.160 that's over. 0:04:54.760 --> 0:04:56.680 Firstly, I've never said I was falling in love with 0:04:56.720 --> 0:04:57.240 an escort. 0:04:59.120 --> 0:05:01.960 You should strong feelings, do you know. 0:05:02.640 --> 0:05:03.440 I don't think I did. 0:05:03.640 --> 0:05:06.080 Look, he's a beautiful human. He's just not my human. 0:05:06.120 --> 0:05:08.880 And that's just where it is at. But still respect 0:05:08.920 --> 0:05:10.600 for anyone in the sex industry. 0:05:11.520 --> 0:05:13.120 But do you remember when we did that chat in 0:05:13.200 --> 0:05:13.599 my house? 0:05:13.800 --> 0:05:15.640 Yep, and I was like, this is not what I 0:05:15.680 --> 0:05:18.200 thought our follow up chat with the escort, and then 0:05:18.240 --> 0:05:20.000 I said, maybe six seven weeks, I want to do 0:05:20.040 --> 0:05:22.960 another follow off of How I Am. Never did I 0:05:22.960 --> 0:05:24.839 think would be in Balibo getting your rips. 0:05:26.080 --> 0:05:27.760 Do you know what? Yeah, I probably do do things 0:05:27.800 --> 0:05:28.159 with a plot. 0:05:28.160 --> 0:05:29.720 I speaking to my manager the other day and she 0:05:29.760 --> 0:05:31.440 was like, oh, Beck, I'm really nervous for you, And 0:05:31.480 --> 0:05:35.160 I said to her, but Babe, like, I don't care 0:05:35.320 --> 0:05:38.680 what anyone thinks, right, I live my life doing what 0:05:38.760 --> 0:05:40.480 I want to do when I want to do it, 0:05:40.520 --> 0:05:41.680 And hatter is it going to hate? 0:05:42.040 --> 0:05:44.920 As Beck and I continued chatting, we kept circling back 0:05:44.960 --> 0:05:48.120 to this point of self love, which to her at 0:05:48.240 --> 0:05:51.719 least is the reason she's here doing this. But to 0:05:51.800 --> 0:05:54.719 me and I suppose so many other people on the 0:05:54.760 --> 0:05:58.000 outside at least, it feels it's perhaps more something she's 0:05:58.040 --> 0:06:01.320 doing in the hope it will finally bring her the 0:06:01.400 --> 0:06:05.839 self love she's always been searching for, especially after losing 0:06:06.360 --> 0:06:08.920 thirty kilos in like the last three years, I think, 0:06:08.960 --> 0:06:12.679 and still not being happy when she looks in the mirror, 0:06:12.720 --> 0:06:17.880 while now endlessly being criticized by millions of people online daily. 0:06:18.440 --> 0:06:21.160 Let me give you an example, right, Okay, So I'm 0:06:21.160 --> 0:06:23.240 going to do some body contouring that's going to make 0:06:23.240 --> 0:06:24.960 me feel better. I've got a lot of loose skin. 0:06:25.320 --> 0:06:27.800 This is the most vulnerable I'm ever going to be, 0:06:27.800 --> 0:06:31.160 because when I have my surgery done, I've said to you, 0:06:31.600 --> 0:06:33.480 if we're going to do this, I want, I want, 0:06:33.560 --> 0:06:35.520 I want people to see all of me. 0:06:35.720 --> 0:06:35.960 Right. 0:06:36.640 --> 0:06:40.400 I've got loose skin, and I'm insecure about it, right 0:06:40.680 --> 0:06:44.159 I am, I just am. I'm proud of myself for 0:06:44.839 --> 0:06:47.120 where I've gotten to, but there's parts of me that 0:06:47.200 --> 0:06:49.840 I that I can't stand sometimes looking in the mirror. 0:06:49.880 --> 0:06:50.720 But but. 0:06:52.240 --> 0:06:55.960 I am doing something that I am excited about for myself, 0:06:56.400 --> 0:06:58.320 and I am going to always do. 0:06:59.600 --> 0:07:01.719 This isn't to be my last cosmetic precadure. Put it 0:07:01.720 --> 0:07:02.039 that way. 0:07:02.560 --> 0:07:04.880 Your body, your choice, what you feel confident with, in 0:07:04.920 --> 0:07:08.039 what you feel comfortable with, fucking do it. So why 0:07:08.040 --> 0:07:11.400 are all these Karens coming at me? Let me get 0:07:11.400 --> 0:07:12.320 my ribs done. 0:07:12.880 --> 0:07:16.000 The thing I find sad here is just the two 0:07:16.080 --> 0:07:20.040 extremes that Beck constantly sits between and I suppose lives between. 0:07:20.080 --> 0:07:22.880 And you know, for months now, since appearing the Maths, 0:07:22.920 --> 0:07:26.000 there has been tens of thousands of comments, if not 0:07:26.080 --> 0:07:29.400 more hundreds of thousands of comments of people picking apart 0:07:29.640 --> 0:07:32.960 every part of Beck's appearance, and you know, they'll write 0:07:33.000 --> 0:07:35.520 things like she should get this done, she should change that. 0:07:35.520 --> 0:07:38.400 That's horrible, like all these very vicious comments, and a 0:07:38.400 --> 0:07:40.640 lot of people write them thinking Beck will never read them, 0:07:40.680 --> 0:07:43.280 But she does read them, any posts about her, any 0:07:43.320 --> 0:07:45.240 news posts she's on there, she's in the comments, and 0:07:45.280 --> 0:07:49.600 she's seeing all these messages. And then after you know, 0:07:49.680 --> 0:07:52.240 she's announced via this series, will Hey, I'm now in 0:07:52.280 --> 0:07:55.720 Bali and I'm about to change something. Now it's the opposite, 0:07:55.760 --> 0:07:59.440 and these thousands of comments from people going this is stupid, 0:07:59.800 --> 0:08:03.000 this is extreme, this is potentially dangerous. Why are you 0:08:03.120 --> 0:08:05.880 doing this? Why can't you love who you are? And 0:08:05.920 --> 0:08:08.720 then when you have someone like Beck in the middle 0:08:08.760 --> 0:08:12.080 of all that, who, let's be honest, is insecure and 0:08:12.160 --> 0:08:15.360 has spent much of a life battling with her body image. 0:08:16.000 --> 0:08:17.960 When like an offer for a trip like this and 0:08:18.000 --> 0:08:21.360 a new procedure here in Balley pops up, I can 0:08:21.480 --> 0:08:24.800 see why she, like back, someone like Beck would jump 0:08:25.120 --> 0:08:30.320 at that chance to just change one thing, which again is. 0:08:30.640 --> 0:08:31.440 Just quite sad. 0:08:32.280 --> 0:08:34.320 There's this thing where overall people are saying, why are 0:08:34.320 --> 0:08:36.280 you doing this rip thing? It's stupid. But then you've 0:08:36.320 --> 0:08:38.800 got thousands of people saying, but you should do this instead, 0:08:38.840 --> 0:08:40.079 and do it, and it's like get. 0:08:39.880 --> 0:08:42.200 Your teeth done, get your mouth done, get your jaw done, 0:08:42.240 --> 0:08:44.520 get your skin done, get you this done, get your 0:08:44.520 --> 0:08:50.160 nose done. Like trust me, if I could, I would, nah, 0:08:50.200 --> 0:08:50.680 please don't. 0:08:50.800 --> 0:08:54.960 Yeah, get a brain trance plant. It's like a fuck off, Jeremy. 0:08:55.160 --> 0:08:58.200 What the way I'm what I'm working my like, what 0:08:58.240 --> 0:09:00.520 I'm working myself off of is this is my body, 0:09:00.520 --> 0:09:05.320 and this is my choice, and I'm choosing to share 0:09:05.360 --> 0:09:07.360 it with people because I'm sure that there's some people 0:09:07.360 --> 0:09:07.760 out there. 0:09:07.760 --> 0:09:07.840 Like. 0:09:08.200 --> 0:09:10.199 To be honest with you, the amount of private messages 0:09:10.240 --> 0:09:12.720 that I've had from people saying, oh my god, I 0:09:12.760 --> 0:09:15.280 didn't realize I could get this done, where are you 0:09:15.320 --> 0:09:15.839 getting it done? 0:09:15.880 --> 0:09:16.360 And what is it? 0:09:16.440 --> 0:09:18.439 Right, you would be surprised, I'd probably say in the 0:09:18.520 --> 0:09:23.720 hundreds right of people being like, Wow, I actually want this. 0:09:23.720 --> 0:09:26.240 This is what worries me in a weird way because 0:09:26.280 --> 0:09:28.240 you know, this is now being quite the fastest growing 0:09:28.400 --> 0:09:31.679 surgery in the world. Yes, it's not available in Australia 0:09:31.720 --> 0:09:33.360 yet because it takes a long time for things to 0:09:33.400 --> 0:09:35.640 be approved there. Yes, which is why people are coming 0:09:35.679 --> 0:09:38.000 to Bali. And now it's essentially available to the Australian 0:09:38.040 --> 0:09:42.079 market in Bali, and yes they you Athena. Everyone here 0:09:42.160 --> 0:09:44.120 is going to document the reality. I'm going to say 0:09:44.120 --> 0:09:46.640 what it's really like. But then I just worry it 0:09:46.679 --> 0:09:50.040 sets this new standard because you remember the Kardashians popped 0:09:50.040 --> 0:09:52.400 along and Kylie had the big lips, but for years 0:09:52.440 --> 0:09:54.640 she denied getting filler. She was saying it was her 0:09:54.679 --> 0:09:57.760 lip or something. And then that was just a lie yep, 0:09:57.840 --> 0:09:59.839 and then Kim had the big one whatever, and it's 0:09:59.840 --> 0:10:01.920 like the more people kept seeing that, and then more 0:10:01.920 --> 0:10:04.520 people copy them, so then it's set its standard. And 0:10:04.559 --> 0:10:06.920 now it feels like in America, especially this RiPP thing, 0:10:07.000 --> 0:10:10.280 this snatch waste, it's huge. Yeah, and that's where I 0:10:10.280 --> 0:10:11.880 saw it, and I read it in my mama Miir 0:10:11.920 --> 0:10:14.240 who said this is the next thing. Yep. And I 0:10:14.240 --> 0:10:16.880 didn't really think it had hit Australia so quick. And 0:10:17.559 --> 0:10:19.600 I get your all being honest, but then do you 0:10:19.640 --> 0:10:22.840 worry that you contact on young girls like in saying 0:10:22.880 --> 0:10:25.439 three months, once everyone's recovered in all your pictures, you've 0:10:25.440 --> 0:10:29.160 got this new hourglass waist, which isn't the sea, it's 0:10:29.240 --> 0:10:31.600 not the the not the thing to boast about right now, 0:10:32.800 --> 0:10:34.200 Like you know, people are going to see that, and 0:10:34.240 --> 0:10:35.760 they'll see it more and more, and they'll see a 0:10:35.760 --> 0:10:38.439 Fino and all the other girls, and then gradually it's 0:10:38.440 --> 0:10:40.720 going to be like, well, young girls, ago, well I 0:10:40.720 --> 0:10:42.240 want that. Oh you can't get that in the gym 0:10:42.240 --> 0:10:43.800 because it's either you're born with this or you're not. 0:10:44.600 --> 0:10:46.480 It's bones in your body, essentially. 0:10:46.600 --> 0:10:47.200 I understand. 0:10:47.240 --> 0:10:50.520 Look, I have a responsibility as someone that's online and 0:10:50.600 --> 0:10:55.280 that is open to everyone about Like, you know, everyone 0:10:55.280 --> 0:10:57.200 can see my social media. That can see my TikTok, 0:10:57.240 --> 0:10:59.040 that can see my Instagram, that can see my Facebook. 0:10:59.040 --> 0:11:01.040 They can see it, all right, And I understand that 0:11:01.080 --> 0:11:03.079 I have a responsibility. 0:11:04.040 --> 0:11:05.520 To the people, to the younger people. 0:11:05.559 --> 0:11:10.480 I mean, my demographic is ninety five percent women, and 0:11:09.960 --> 0:11:13.079 the the age the ages are probably. 0:11:12.679 --> 0:11:15.600 Around twenty seven to forty five who follow me. 0:11:16.160 --> 0:11:18.800 However, I'm going to come back at you and say, well, 0:11:18.840 --> 0:11:22.600 all right, is this setting a bad standard for someone? 0:11:22.840 --> 0:11:24.960 But then what happens if someone sees me and I 0:11:25.000 --> 0:11:27.440 walk out and I've got some little body chondress on 0:11:27.480 --> 0:11:31.719 and I look some hot effie cats number, you know, stylish, 0:11:31.760 --> 0:11:34.199 and these young girls are going I wish I had 0:11:34.200 --> 0:11:37.120 a waistlength that, and then they hate themselves. But I've 0:11:37.160 --> 0:11:39.320 been honest and said, this is what I've gotten done. 0:11:39.320 --> 0:11:41.680 And if you want to get to this point instead 0:11:41.679 --> 0:11:44.400 of hating yourself because you don't look like a feno 0:11:44.559 --> 0:11:48.080 or mean almost look like me, obviously, sit thisloth over here. 0:11:48.720 --> 0:11:52.200 But like I put yourself downe with shut up, someone give. 0:11:52.040 --> 0:11:52.560 Me free teeth. 0:11:52.679 --> 0:11:55.199 No, I'm just kidding but like, you know, if they 0:11:55.360 --> 0:11:58.559 look like me or any of the other girls, instead 0:11:58.600 --> 0:12:00.640 of like doing a car and. 0:12:00.840 --> 0:12:02.920 Saying I'm just natural, this is just what I'm like. 0:12:03.200 --> 0:12:06.320 If you train this way, then you'll attain this. That's 0:12:06.360 --> 0:12:08.240 also not being responsible for. 0:12:08.720 --> 0:12:11.120 At least they will instantly know, Hey, you may be 0:12:11.240 --> 0:12:13.320 looking and want this figure, but this isn't natural. 0:12:13.440 --> 0:12:15.000 I paid for this. This was cosmetic. 0:12:15.240 --> 0:12:17.760 But this is a critical situation that I've done. I've 0:12:17.760 --> 0:12:20.680 made an informed decision about and I am not responsible. 0:12:20.880 --> 0:12:21.600 I understand that. 0:12:21.679 --> 0:12:24.839 What I do you know now in the public eye 0:12:25.240 --> 0:12:32.360 is i have a responsibility to be ethical and open 0:12:32.480 --> 0:12:36.000 about what I'm doing. But at the same time, I'm 0:12:36.040 --> 0:12:39.400 not responsible for anyone else's decisions about their body, and 0:12:39.480 --> 0:12:42.600 therefore no one else is responsible to make a decision 0:12:42.600 --> 0:12:43.559 about mine. 0:12:44.160 --> 0:12:46.800 One thing that is hard when talking to Back is 0:12:46.840 --> 0:12:50.320 how often she just puts herself down. If I'm being 0:12:50.320 --> 0:12:52.959 honest and like, this isn't me claiming to be a psychologist, 0:12:52.960 --> 0:12:54.479 I'll have some deep. 0:12:54.320 --> 0:12:57.080 Understanding of why people do things they do. But I mean, 0:12:58.080 --> 0:12:58.439 if you. 0:12:58.440 --> 0:13:02.280 Just endlessly speak about yourself negatively and frame it negatively 0:13:02.320 --> 0:13:04.400 in your mind, like when you look at yourself all 0:13:05.000 --> 0:13:09.040 that is going to do is reinforce this belief in 0:13:09.080 --> 0:13:13.400 you that you constantly need to change yourself. Does all 0:13:13.440 --> 0:13:16.000 of your choices with that come from a place of insecurity? 0:13:17.640 --> 0:13:17.880 Yeah? 0:13:17.920 --> 0:13:20.440 Look this this will be my most vulnerable and my 0:13:20.480 --> 0:13:23.240 most insecure. Like everyone's like share someone insecure on maps. 0:13:23.520 --> 0:13:26.920 This coming up, your your documentary about this about me. 0:13:27.400 --> 0:13:29.840 This is where I'm going to be letting my walls 0:13:29.880 --> 0:13:32.720 down in a way that I've never before. You get naked, 0:13:32.760 --> 0:13:34.880 you have a shag whatever, like it's good fun and 0:13:35.040 --> 0:13:38.800 like you know, like that's great. But I'm allowing, not allowing. 0:13:38.840 --> 0:13:41.240 I don't want to sound like I'm that sounds what's 0:13:41.280 --> 0:13:42.280 the word not allowing? 0:13:42.320 --> 0:13:42.480 You? 0:13:43.600 --> 0:13:45.480 We even we have collaborated. 0:13:45.520 --> 0:13:48.199 You're happy to when we spoke about me doing this 0:13:48.360 --> 0:13:50.839 and I was asking your reasons. Obviously you have lost 0:13:50.920 --> 0:13:54.559 a lot of way in recent years, and every time 0:13:54.720 --> 0:13:57.720 I've met you this year, there's always been a moment 0:13:57.760 --> 0:13:59.719 where you've looked at yourself in the mirror. You've looked 0:13:59.720 --> 0:14:01.880 at way you are in and you complained about your skin, 0:14:02.080 --> 0:14:04.360 or you've tried to hide something, or even this morning 0:14:04.400 --> 0:14:06.520 at breakfast the group of us, the first thing you 0:14:06.559 --> 0:14:09.320 did was like, show how you're hiding your belly, and 0:14:09.360 --> 0:14:10.560 I said, you don't have to do that. 0:14:11.040 --> 0:14:13.560 Because I know I'm thin, right, I know I'm little, 0:14:14.160 --> 0:14:18.360 but I do you. I'm where I've invited you in 0:14:18.440 --> 0:14:23.040 to actually film the most vulnerable parts of me, which 0:14:23.280 --> 0:14:25.840 is what's underneath my clothes. I know I can put 0:14:25.880 --> 0:14:29.480 an outfit together a look schmick, but what's underneath my 0:14:29.520 --> 0:14:31.160 clothes is my insecurity. 0:14:31.280 --> 0:14:35.240 It's my tomorrow. When I'm coming to the hospital with you. 0:14:36.280 --> 0:14:38.280 You're going to have the scan and stuff before they 0:14:38.760 --> 0:14:42.400 draw on your body, and you say you've never you want, Well, 0:14:42.400 --> 0:14:44.360 you told me you want to show people because there's 0:14:44.360 --> 0:14:46.400 so many people that are going to relate to that. 0:14:46.720 --> 0:14:50.200 Yeah, and I'm a real woman. I'm a real human being, 0:14:50.360 --> 0:14:54.080 and I of course like not no one walks around 0:14:54.160 --> 0:14:57.280 like some of these influences here like are the like 0:14:57.960 --> 0:15:01.800 they're so perfect and view and they're still standing there 0:15:01.800 --> 0:15:03.320 being like, oh I hate this or I hate this 0:15:03.440 --> 0:15:05.840 my hair, And it's like, so no one anyone out 0:15:05.840 --> 0:15:08.800 there that sits here and says, oh, yeah, I love 0:15:08.880 --> 0:15:09.840 every aspect of me. 0:15:09.960 --> 0:15:10.360 Good on you. 0:15:10.440 --> 0:15:12.440 I wish I could get to that point, but I'm 0:15:12.520 --> 0:15:15.320 a real woman who's gone through real time things, who 0:15:15.400 --> 0:15:18.200 was overweight for a long time, much to the reddit 0:15:18.400 --> 0:15:22.200 people's dismay of no, she wasn't. And so from that, 0:15:22.680 --> 0:15:24.760 I'm proud of myself of where I've gotten to, but 0:15:24.880 --> 0:15:27.320 I have insecurities about the loose skin on my stomach. 0:15:27.920 --> 0:15:31.680 Something I hope that would potentially happen through this series 0:15:31.840 --> 0:15:35.880 is that by back not just talking openly about the 0:15:35.880 --> 0:15:39.280 loose skin she is so insecure about after her weight loss, 0:15:39.320 --> 0:15:42.720 but making that choice, like through me and the content, 0:15:42.800 --> 0:15:46.200 that she wants to show it publicly for the first 0:15:46.280 --> 0:15:48.400 time and like stop hiding it as if it's something 0:15:48.440 --> 0:15:52.160 to be ashamed of. Is that perhaps or I thought, 0:15:52.560 --> 0:15:55.600 maybe naively, that it may lead to this like moment 0:15:55.760 --> 0:15:58.480 of empowerment for her where she realizes that, you know, 0:15:58.520 --> 0:16:02.560 she's just not a lot with this or this single insecurity, 0:16:02.600 --> 0:16:05.600 and there'll be so many people out there, women especially, 0:16:05.600 --> 0:16:08.720 who feel the same and also spend so much of 0:16:08.760 --> 0:16:12.240 their life hiding you know, certain parts of themselves. And 0:16:12.280 --> 0:16:17.400 then maybe again naively, I thought, back having that little moment, 0:16:17.600 --> 0:16:20.520 it may make her see that, you know, instead of 0:16:20.520 --> 0:16:24.040 going to such extremes of physically changing things like with 0:16:24.120 --> 0:16:27.400 this procedure, maybe for Beck at least, you know, should 0:16:27.440 --> 0:16:30.720 realize the thing she should focus on changing first is 0:16:30.800 --> 0:16:36.080 her mentality and how she sees herself and refers to herself. 0:16:36.800 --> 0:16:39.480 Like I've got shaggy boobs and I've got ssagy skiin 0:16:39.640 --> 0:16:41.560 and like my bomb, I don't have a bum anymore, 0:16:41.600 --> 0:16:44.360 like you know, And because I've lost all my boobs 0:16:44.360 --> 0:16:45.680 and my bomb, I look like I. 0:16:45.680 --> 0:16:46.800 Look very blocky. 0:16:47.000 --> 0:16:49.320 And so when this came up, I was like, yeah, 0:16:49.360 --> 0:16:51.240 I want this, I want to do this. 0:16:51.960 --> 0:16:55.400 And do you feel confident since you lost the wight? 0:16:56.240 --> 0:16:59.680 Yeah? Way more confident, way more confident. Absolutely. 0:16:59.800 --> 0:17:03.960 I think that getting dressed is fun, you know, walking 0:17:04.040 --> 0:17:06.719 around and not feeling self conscious, like coming to Bali 0:17:07.160 --> 0:17:08.919 and I came down for breakfast this morning in a 0:17:08.920 --> 0:17:11.280 bikini top, pants and a shirt, but like I was 0:17:11.320 --> 0:17:15.639 still walking around exposed, confident, you know, getting dressed to 0:17:15.640 --> 0:17:17.760 go for dinners and putting on a little dress and 0:17:17.840 --> 0:17:20.879 not sitting there and trying on fifteen thousand outfits and 0:17:20.920 --> 0:17:22.679 hating every one of them because I hated what I 0:17:22.720 --> 0:17:23.399 see in the mirror. 0:17:23.840 --> 0:17:24.800 It's changed my life. 0:17:24.960 --> 0:17:29.840 But if some of that confidence maybe forced or convincing yourself. 0:17:30.359 --> 0:17:33.159 Nah, No, I don't think so. I think because I 0:17:33.440 --> 0:17:35.240 love what I love what I look like with clothes on. 0:17:35.720 --> 0:17:37.359 But what I look like with clothes off is what 0:17:38.560 --> 0:17:42.040 hits my soul hard. I struggle with my with my 0:17:42.119 --> 0:17:45.080 loose skin, and I struggle with the fact that I train, 0:17:45.320 --> 0:17:47.400 but I no matter how much I train, like I've 0:17:47.400 --> 0:17:49.040 got muscles, but there's still loose skin. 0:17:49.160 --> 0:17:49.680 I hate it. 0:17:49.720 --> 0:17:51.280 I hate it. I hate it. 0:17:52.119 --> 0:17:52.560 I hate it. 0:17:52.600 --> 0:17:55.440 I get that, it's just fucking hate. 0:17:55.480 --> 0:17:58.040 It makes me sad in a way that like I 0:17:58.080 --> 0:18:00.520 get it. And especially know the industry. You're in your 0:18:00.800 --> 0:18:02.879 class as an influencer. Now you've got an audience, so 0:18:02.960 --> 0:18:05.440 you're going to all these beauty events and you're around 0:18:06.480 --> 0:18:10.320 essentially perfect people endlessly because that's this industry. And I suppose, 0:18:10.359 --> 0:18:12.520 you know, maybe you got to this mindset where you 0:18:12.560 --> 0:18:15.159 did feel comfortable, but then certainly you're now in this 0:18:15.280 --> 0:18:18.800 new extreme of fashion WEEKND models and. 0:18:19.280 --> 0:18:23.280 Yeah, and look, there is a pressure, but I don't 0:18:23.320 --> 0:18:25.879 give in. I think we all know, right, you, me, 0:18:26.800 --> 0:18:29.159 the public, everyone. I think everyone knows that if I 0:18:29.200 --> 0:18:30.880 want to do something, I do it. If I don't 0:18:30.880 --> 0:18:33.800 want to do something, I don't do it. Right, and 0:18:35.040 --> 0:18:37.359 I don't feel pressured to do this. I want to, 0:18:38.240 --> 0:18:42.000 I want I want to do this. I don't feel pressure. 0:18:42.000 --> 0:18:43.760 You know, there's people in my life that are like, oh, 0:18:44.160 --> 0:18:47.040 don't do it. You You've been telling me fifteen hundred times, 0:18:47.040 --> 0:18:48.320