Speaker 1: Apologie production. Hi, my name's Beck Wodbine, and welcome to
Speaker 1: Tenderness for Nurses.
Speaker 2: I'm grateful for the person that I had the opportunity
Speaker 2: to be.
Speaker 1: So I hid it and parked it for Nelly four years.
Speaker 1: We always have free will, We always get to choose.
Speaker 2: We are autonomous.
Speaker 1: Good afternoon everyone, Thank you for tuning back in to
Speaker 1: Tenderness for Nurses. I am very privileged to have a
Speaker 1: lovely colleague of mine, Simon Rita Alexander, who I met
Speaker 1: not that long ago, actually at a skincare meeting. It
Speaker 1: was a lastin, wasn't it that we were mar the
Speaker 1: Galderma product, which I just have to say, and this
Speaker 1: isn't a plug for anyone, but it is remarkable. But
Speaker 1: you particularly love it because your background is in wound
Speaker 1: care as an endorsed and rold nurse.
Speaker 2: Correct.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so just give us a little bit of the
Speaker 1: back of how long or when did you do your eens?
Speaker 2: So about eight years ago now, and I did my
Speaker 2: graduar at a private hospital in post op plastic and
Speaker 2: reconstructive wing care. Sure, so, dealing with lots of gender
Speaker 2: reaffirming surgeries, neckfash wounds, lots of stuff. So that's probably
Speaker 2: what got me really into not only wind cabit, how
Speaker 2: the skin heels, how to protect the skin barrier, all
Speaker 2: the things that have kind of led me to the
Speaker 2: point where I am now.
Speaker 1: So the gender affirming surgery, you now have your own practice.
Speaker 1: I do, yes, within the ascetic space. Yes, so you
Speaker 1: know your competition.
Speaker 2: I know, totally, totally.
Speaker 1: I'd like to say that, but actually we're anything but no.
Speaker 1: But do you tend to get patients now that are
Speaker 1: on that journey?
Speaker 2: I do, yes. I get patients of all varieties. Obviously
Speaker 2: we know our bread and butter is female, but I
Speaker 2: do get a wide variety of genders, socioeconomic backgrounds, lots
Speaker 2: of different people. In I try to focus on what
Speaker 2: I call it is positive aging. So I really come
Speaker 2: down to trying to bring my background in nursing and
Speaker 2: the reason why I started nursing is I want to
Speaker 2: help people and I try to bring that into cosmetics.
Speaker 2: So whether it be with how they look, how they feel,
Speaker 2: if they need a chat, it's all kind of relevant.
Speaker 1: It isn't that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So do you say no? Lots?
Speaker 1: Me too? Oh my god, all the time?
Speaker 2: Do you yeah? Me too? And I'm surprised at the
Speaker 2: amount of other nurses that say, oh you say no,
Speaker 2: and I'm like.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a scary part of our industry. And I
Speaker 1: have to say, there seems to be two types of
Speaker 1: people within the aesthetic space. There seems to be the
Speaker 1: one that I'm medically ethically orientated and the ones that
Speaker 1: are financially orientated. Would that be your take.
Speaker 2: I definitely think so. I think. Look to be real,
Speaker 2: I got into the industry because initially I was financially
Speaker 2: motivated because I got really down about what I was
Speaker 2: getting paid for a really long week at the hospital,
Speaker 2: and not only was the compensation not sufficient, the support
Speaker 2: wasn't sufficient. The emotional burnout just from doing the job,
Speaker 2: no matter what level of nursing you are, just from
Speaker 2: that patient interaction had really gotten to me. And this
Speaker 2: was a way I thought maybe I could solve some
Speaker 2: of those issues.
Speaker 1: So do you still work within the hospital?
Speaker 2: I do, yeah, so casually. Yeah, I work in day
Speaker 2: surgery and postop recovery.
Speaker 1: Awesome. So doing plastics still.
Speaker 2: Lots plastics is obviously one of your biggest operating theater
Speaker 2: time consumers, so we do look after a lot of
Speaker 2: plastic patients. But also autho IVF, a very small amount
Speaker 2: of gender reaffirming and a lot of fertility. Actually, is
Speaker 2: that right?
Speaker 1: I actually started when I went and worked at s
Speaker 1: Andrew's Hospital. I did my post grad year after I'd
Speaker 1: done my registered nursing, my degree in nursing at s
Speaker 1: Andrew's Hospital, and I started off doing lots of IVF.
Speaker 1: Guyany and ies believe it.
Speaker 2: Or not, Oh my god, this so much.
Speaker 1: So so much, and I loved it. And then I
Speaker 1: moved across and worked for Quins and Fertility Group for
Speaker 1: numerous years. But I did everything, you know, like theater, recovery, anesthetics, grubbing, scouting,
Speaker 1: admissions like.
Speaker 2: We just you do kind of have to be a
Speaker 2: jack of all train.
Speaker 1: Yeah. And I loved it. I really loved it. The
Speaker 1: hours were great. You know, we didn't think about pay
Speaker 1: back then. It was just nurses just got great.
Speaker 2: I didn't. I don't know one nurse that said I
Speaker 2: got into nursing the pay No, I'll let.
Speaker 1: Me thinking about that. Yeah, i'd have to say. I
Speaker 1: can't say I've ever heard that either.
Speaker 2: No, So you know, I'm sure there might be some,
Speaker 2: but yeah, definitely not me.
Speaker 1: What did you do before you became a nurse.
Speaker 2: So I actually was. I was a full time drag queen.
Speaker 2: What are you now? There I was, and then I
Speaker 2: was a hairdresser for ten years. So here in Brisbane,
Speaker 2: both here in Brisbane.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and where did you where did.
Speaker 2: You all all the local clubs from here to the
Speaker 2: Gold Coast for quite a few years, namely one club
Speaker 2: in the valley. That's quite so. I enjoyed it at
Speaker 2: the time, I was it anymore? No too much effort?
Speaker 1: Oh you like beautiful? Oh? Thank you? Absolutely stunning us
Speaker 1: some of the drag.
Speaker 2: Queens, aren't they. Yeah. And that's the amount of effort
Speaker 2: that is a lot, is it?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: My god? And money really just to keep up makeup, wigs, costuming,
Speaker 2: and to be honest, I'm you know, I'm almost forty.
Speaker 2: I can't stay up that late.
Speaker 1: My god, Yes, I'm anana.
Speaker 2: I'm ready for bed at seven thirty.
Speaker 1: Well, I have to say almost forty. You don't look
Speaker 1: at that.
Speaker 2: Oh, well, you know perks of the industry.
Speaker 1: Do you miss that? Do you miss the camaraderie? Well?
Speaker 2: Interesting you say that, because yes, but I've developed a
Speaker 2: different camaraderie in the cosmetic space. I've gotten a real
Speaker 2: partnership and a real sense of community that I never
Speaker 2: had in surgical nursing. So with a very small cohort, definitely,
Speaker 2: I find that the support in the cosmetic space is
Speaker 2: tenfold better than it was in hospital nursing. Not only
Speaker 2: the support professionally, but the support emotionally, the support with
Speaker 2: adverse events, the support in growing your business. It's all there,
Speaker 2: and it's all quite easily accessible.
Speaker 1: Actually, we were meant to do this podcast last week
Speaker 1: and I had to go and help a colleague with
Speaker 1: a significant vascular exression and it was so lovely you
Speaker 1: just meant, yeah, no, go for going, of course, you know,
Speaker 1: but I love the fact that there are people that
Speaker 1: can reach out to me no judgment. It can happen
Speaker 1: to the best injector, and it has on stage, I
Speaker 1: want to say, but you would never know because they're
Speaker 1: just so calm.
Speaker 2: Well, it's not a reflection of you personally or professionally.
Speaker 2: As we all know, it can happen.
Speaker 1: Without a doubt. And I think the more time we
Speaker 1: spend understanding and the research is there, the more we
Speaker 1: know anatomically less likely we are to have a VEO.
Speaker 1: But as you know, and so you guys understand that
Speaker 1: we are taught anatomy facial anatomy, but thirty percent of
Speaker 1: that now we know, diverges from what we know to
Speaker 1: be true, if not maybe more than thirty percent. So
Speaker 1: when we are injecting people's faces, in our minds, we
Speaker 1: have a map of where the major vessels are ar, trees, muscles, ligaments,
Speaker 1: bone structure, everything is, but on some people it's completely different.
Speaker 1: Or one side might be the norm and the other
Speaker 1: side is completely different.
Speaker 2: Yet to encounter a patient that is symmetrical, no one
Speaker 2: is no, No one is no.
Speaker 1: So it I know there are medical and nursing groups
Speaker 1: out there that look at our industry as fluffy, but
Speaker 1: I can tell you it is anything but especially when
Speaker 1: you add wound care, lasers, skin dermatology, and injectibles, it
Speaker 1: is an that incorporates so many other health concerns.
Speaker 2: Do you know what I as a cosmetic nurse, we
Speaker 2: see our patients sometimes monthly, but you know, at a
Speaker 2: minimum three to six monthly, So we're seeing them more
Speaker 2: than their primary care giver, physician, their GP, their you know,
Speaker 2: specialist surgeon. So I think it's our responsibility to not
Speaker 2: only do what they ask cosmetically. But I'm always getting
Speaker 2: asked what's this or you know, I've said, hey, have
Speaker 2: you had that checked out? I've done blood services, PRP, biophila.
Speaker 2: When I've discovered the plasma is not looking good, not
Speaker 2: looking great, I've sent them to the doctor. Straight after
Speaker 2: I've called the doctor, I've explained what's going on and yeah,
Speaker 2: super high and calcium yep.
Speaker 1: And mind you, I've also done that and said you
Speaker 1: partied a bit too hard on the.
Speaker 2: Correct you know, it could have been one, it could
Speaker 2: have been the Oh my god, how did you know?
Speaker 1: And I was like, well, I just saw your plasma.
Speaker 1: I think maybe we stopped this treatment and you know,
Speaker 1: drink fair bit of water and we'll see you in
Speaker 1: a couple of yeah, correct time. However, it is true,
Speaker 1: And because I have another nurse practitioner that comes into
Speaker 1: the clinic that does skin cancer management and I have
Speaker 1: a great relationship with germs in Brisbane as well as
Speaker 1: plastics as I know you do. Yes, I've got a
Speaker 1: client recently that you know, if youdex on one spot,
Speaker 1: oh my god, the BCC was horrific. And then from
Speaker 1: there we've gone on. You know, she's now got other
Speaker 1: BCCs on her face. But we're not just putting needles
Speaker 1: in people's faces. No, And you know I've told my
Speaker 1: story on the podcast about not drinking. I can't tell
Speaker 1: you now how many people ask me about how they
Speaker 1: can give up alcohol. Now.
Speaker 2: Oh, it's you know, it's systemic in the way we
Speaker 2: have to look after our patients, as in we've got
Speaker 2: to not only do skincare, but where they're talking cosmetics,
Speaker 2: we're talking general mental health. You know, not that maybe
Speaker 2: all of us have the qualifications to give, you know,
Speaker 2: professional advice, but we're certainly a sounding board and.
Speaker 1: We know who to refer on to correct, because I'm assuming,
Speaker 1: as an endorsement raw nurse with the upper guidelines, did
Speaker 1: you have a registered nurse?
Speaker 2: So I do have registered nurse employed. She's employed and
Speaker 2: contracted for both indirect and direct supervision. So just depending
Speaker 2: on what procedure is booked in and what area of
Speaker 2: the face, and what medication I'm using of course, so
Speaker 2: you're doing everything right. Oh, correct. I found being an
Speaker 2: endorsed in ROLD nurse and a slightly competitive person by nature,
Speaker 2: I overstudy. So when I first got into cosmetics, I
Speaker 2: and I've seen you speak about this. I had definite
Speaker 2: imposter syndrome. I thought, what am I doing? How? You know?
Speaker 2: And I just had been fortunate enough to have the
Speaker 2: background in plastic surgery that I was accepted, But I
Speaker 2: didn't feel like I was like, what are you doing?
Speaker 2: You know, you're literally one of maybe a handful of
Speaker 2: ians that are allowed to What makes you think you're
Speaker 2: going to be good enough?
Speaker 1: And how did you overcome that?
Speaker 2: The support of the community, mutual friends which we know
Speaker 2: other like doctors, have been so supportive and so encouraging.
Speaker 2: Nurse practitioners like yourself, fellow nurses in and out of
Speaker 2: the industry, have just really given me that confidence that, hey,
Speaker 2: you know, I am good at what I do. Yes,
Speaker 2: I'm fortunate that I do have an aesthetic eye, which
Speaker 2: has worked hand in hand with the cosmetic field.
Speaker 1: Well, you know what, I really believe the best aesthetic
Speaker 1: practitioners have an aesthetic and not everyone does. I know
Speaker 1: when I trained for Galderma, I could go in and
Speaker 1: I could see this gaping hole in someone's cheek and
Speaker 1: I'm like, going, you need we have to put something here,
Speaker 1: and they people can't see it. I couldn't understand it.
Speaker 2: How they couldn't see it.
Speaker 1: And maybe because I look at things in symmetry, I
Speaker 1: just couldn't understand how they couldn't treat someone in a
Speaker 1: symmetrical manner. You don't want to be you know, people
Speaker 1: aren't exactly the same. But if there's a whole, surely
Speaker 1: you can see that.
Speaker 2: Whole, well, correct you? Well one would hope, wouldn't you.
Speaker 2: But they can't know, And maybe they're blinded by financial gain,
Speaker 2: blinded by he is in the industry. Who knows. I
Speaker 2: don't know.
Speaker 1: It's a really interesting thing, and I certainly know there
Speaker 1: are certain clinics out there that you really know what
Speaker 1: clinics someone's gone to because of how that person looks,
Speaker 1: because they reject everyone exactly.
Speaker 2: The same correct or it's one area, yeah.
Speaker 1: And it's an interesting thing where if you really want
Speaker 1: a beautiful, bespoke treatment, it's usually little bit every correct.
Speaker 2: And one of the first things I say to my patients,
Speaker 2: especially if they're new, is, first of all, I affirmed
Speaker 2: that they should feel beautiful and confident in themselves without
Speaker 2: our help, because again, coming from someone that has struggled
Speaker 2: with self confidence, mental health, all of those kind of
Speaker 2: struggles that we all do my whole life. I like
Speaker 2: to make sure people know that no matter what we do,
Speaker 2: they should feel beautiful in their own skin. And that's
Speaker 2: why I really try and reinforce. Instead of calling an
Speaker 2: anti aging, I like to refer to it as positive aging.
Speaker 1: I love that.
Speaker 2: I might use that myself. Why not, because if you
Speaker 2: don't feel good in your skin, what are you doing?
Speaker 1: Oh? I wouldn't agree more. You would find, as I've found,
Speaker 1: particularly women that having a marriage breakdown or a relationship
Speaker 1: break out, and they come in, they go, just fill
Speaker 1: me up. I want to feel better, yep. And if
Speaker 1: it's a new client, I won't. No, I might, I
Speaker 1: might do a little bit of yeah, but I won't
Speaker 1: do a lot or I'll focus on this skin correct
Speaker 1: first and foremost skin because I just think it's a
Speaker 1: real knee jerk reaction and there's more obviously going on.
Speaker 1: And I'm not about to take a lot of money
Speaker 1: from someone who's about to be paying for financial legal
Speaker 1: services and lord knows whatever else because they feel like
Speaker 1: shit because their partner's just up and you know, gone
Speaker 1: off with an eighteen year old.
Speaker 2: Do you get I'm sure you do. But I get
Speaker 2: a lot of people sometimes regular patients, they come in
Speaker 2: and they go, let's just do something. I need something.
Speaker 2: And then after consultation, I'm like, well, what are we
Speaker 2: wanting to work on? What can you see? Oh? I
Speaker 2: just want something. I always go back to skin, let's
Speaker 2: work on skin.
Speaker 1: So my I mean, I've been doing this for fifty
Speaker 1: twenty years. My clients now know not to ask that question,
Speaker 1: and they will never come in and go. And they
Speaker 1: also know now I won't treat too soon between anti
Speaker 1: wrinkle treatments because I explained to them that the product
Speaker 1: is still sitting between the nerve and the muscle, and
Speaker 1: therefore the product that is injected gets washed away and
Speaker 1: then the old one falls away, and then you start
Speaker 1: getting into that what they people used to call as
Speaker 1: a top up or a dosa just and I go, no,
Speaker 1: don't do that, No, I send them away. And then
Speaker 1: they come back and you know what, my clients now know.
Speaker 1: They will go, I just need to reschedule for a
Speaker 1: month's time because I know that's going to send me
Speaker 1: away and I'm not quite jue yet. And it's so
Speaker 1: wonderful because it's a about education, and no one ever
Speaker 1: comes in now and asks for unless it's a new patient.
Speaker 1: No one ever asked.
Speaker 2: I mean, the new patients always ask for top ups.
Speaker 2: But I hate that phrase.
Speaker 1: It's yes, correct, and it's only two weeks and I'm.
Speaker 2: Sorry, it's exactly three weeks max. And for me it's
Speaker 2: I'm an underdoser. I think that's the safest way to
Speaker 2: play it, especially with me being an endorsed in ye
Speaker 2: old nurse, but speaking more as a whole as you'd
Speaker 2: know anti wrinkle, we can't take it back. No, no,
Speaker 2: And coming from a point of view of someone that
Speaker 2: inherently cares about people, I would not want that to
Speaker 2: happen to any of my patients or anyone.
Speaker 1: Oh no, absolutely not. And at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: as a prescribing nurse, it has to I have to
Speaker 1: prescribe for someone because it is.
Speaker 2: Something that they need correct.
Speaker 1: If there's no movement, then I'm prescribing for nothing exactly.
Speaker 1: So it also comes back to being an ethical prescriber.
Speaker 2: I think so.
Speaker 1: And I think that's really really important. You touched on
Speaker 1: before about your own mental health journey.
Speaker 2: Are you comfortable to talk about it totally? I think
Speaker 2: it's important to shed a light on that, especially in the.
Speaker 1: Nursing space and especially male correct there's not many of us,
Speaker 1: so do you mind sharing.
Speaker 2: Look, I've struggled my whole life. Without getting too into it,
Speaker 2: my family situation coming out was not easy. It's a
Speaker 2: very religious background there, and it caused a lot of drama,
Speaker 2: caused a lot of lack of confidence, lack of feeling worthy.
Speaker 2: I've obviously worked through that. I still struggle every day
Speaker 2: with depression, and that's something that I have learned to manage,
Speaker 2: obviously through the right medication, but also through mindfulness, through meditation, meditation.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, and you exercise that I do, so
Speaker 2: I try it well. I would like to exercise daily,
Speaker 2: but if I'm being honest, I exercise three times a
Speaker 2: week if I can.
Speaker 1: And do you see a psychologist?
Speaker 2: Do I see a counselor a psychologist and a psychiatrist?
Speaker 2: So yeah, the called Trio.
Speaker 1: So last week a lovely young friend of mine, she
Speaker 1: was a very good friend with my daughter and played
Speaker 1: water Apollo. She came on the podcast and Alice was
Speaker 1: talking about as an lead athlete that you know she's
Speaker 1: She was laughing about her whole life. She has you know,
Speaker 1: family psychologists, sporting psychologists, another sporting psychologist like goes on
Speaker 1: and on and on, and it has got her to
Speaker 1: where it got her to the Olympics in the right headspace.
Speaker 1: But what was interesting was that she realized that she
Speaker 1: had to see a family psychologist to work on other
Speaker 1: issues that a sporting psychologist couldn't help her with. So
Speaker 1: in my mind, you saw the psychiatrist for your medications.
Speaker 1: You see the psychologist and for someone to download to
Speaker 1: and to, you know, worrying you to get off your chest.
Speaker 1: And the counselor would be similar. I would have change.
Speaker 2: Every day issues. Counselor is why did I react like that?
Speaker 2: Trying to get that background of why did I get
Speaker 2: so angry? Or why did I let that person walk
Speaker 2: over me? Why didn't I say the boundary? Correct? Correct?
Speaker 1: Do you think? In And this is something I've really
Speaker 1: struggled with and caused a serious issue with burnout an
Speaker 1: alcohol few years back. I just couldn't say no. I
Speaker 1: couldn't say no any patient. I couldn't say no. I
Speaker 1: just couldn't say no because I'm so worried that you
Speaker 1: know that that go to the next person, or that
Speaker 1: I wouldn't be good enough for saying no, And sending
Speaker 1: boundaries is very hard for me.
Speaker 2: Me too. Professionally, I can say no, I can say
Speaker 2: no to piller, I can say no to other medications,
Speaker 2: but I cannot say no personally. And I don't know
Speaker 2: if that comes from that nurturing side of me. The
Speaker 2: reason why I wanted to get into nursing, the drive
Speaker 2: to help people. But my husband's also helped me understand this.
Speaker 2: I can't help people add a detriment to myself. But
Speaker 2: we do, though, but we do so.
Speaker 1: So I when what is your relationship with your family? Now?
Speaker 2: It's great now. You know my dad passed away about
Speaker 2: eight years ago. Now it was a complicated relationship. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but I was very fortunate. About about a week after
Speaker 2: you passed, I met my now husband.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so it's like your dad passed.
Speaker 2: And kind of I mean I used to joke with
Speaker 2: him that, you know, I said, oh, my dad passed,
Speaker 2: So you know, you can never leave me now because
Speaker 2: I've got issues.
Speaker 1: And when you came out to your family, how old
Speaker 1: were you? So? I was eighteen, And I just want
Speaker 1: to say, I hate the idea of and it's such
Speaker 1: a I feel like it's an old fashioned term because
Speaker 1: totally someone the other week, someone young I heard them saying,
Speaker 1: what do you mean came out? What does that mean?
Speaker 1: Why don't you just always what you are?
Speaker 2: So I think in some ways it is an archaic term.
Speaker 2: I don't think as someone that identifies as a gay man,
Speaker 2: I don't think there should be a need to come out.
Speaker 2: I mean, the point of equality and inclusivity is that
Speaker 2: we're all the same. So why should one particular person
Speaker 2: from a particular group have to say, Hey, this is
Speaker 2: who I sleep with. It's not no one's business. So unfortunately,
Speaker 2: it was not as acceptable as it is now when
Speaker 2: I came out, and I didn't come out by choice.
Speaker 2: I was unfortunately outed. Oh god, yeah, and that caused
Speaker 2: a lot of drama and a lot of issues within
Speaker 2: my family and you and me and.
Speaker 1: I would assume that said ongoing issues, correct, yep? Why
Speaker 1: did that person feel like they needed to do that?
Speaker 2: Look, we were young. I don't want to look at this. No, no, no,
Speaker 2: not at all. This person I have and I have forgived.
Speaker 2: And it wasn't just one person. It was a chain,
Speaker 2: a chain of people, with most of them being in
Speaker 2: my family.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, it's like the Swiss cheese is correct.
Speaker 2: It all lines because you know, I was living with
Speaker 2: one they said unacceptable. Then another called me and said,
Speaker 2: you've got to tell your mother. Now you have half
Speaker 2: an hour. And how old were barely eighteen?
Speaker 1: Oh huh? Yeah? And how did did you cope with it?
Speaker 1: Did you end up having to leave home?
Speaker 2: Yeah? So I had already left home because my mental
Speaker 2: health was it was not a good taste for me
Speaker 2: to be. And without getting too much into that, because
Speaker 2: that's not my story to tell, I moved out with
Speaker 2: some family. Unfortunately, when that all came out, I had
Speaker 2: to move again.
Speaker 1: Where did you find support?
Speaker 2: Because in my chosen to be honest, But were you homeless? Essentially?
Speaker 2: I never thought of myself as homeless, but yeah, I
Speaker 2: think I countersurved for two years.
Speaker 1: Do you know that is.
Speaker 2: Far?
Speaker 1: That is one of the most common forms of homelessness.
Speaker 1: Then most people realize and it's something that's really hard
Speaker 1: to measure. Yeah, because people don't consider it as well.
Speaker 2: It's interesting because I never up until this moment, I
Speaker 2: never thought of myself as being but I guess I was.
Speaker 2: I had a car, I had somewhat of an income,
Speaker 2: I was studying.
Speaker 1: You should be so proud of yourself. Yeah, I am
Speaker 1: in retrospect, No like here, and now you should be
Speaker 1: not in retrospect. You should be absolutely so proud of
Speaker 1: yourself because you've overcome things that some people unfortunately never
Speaker 1: overcome and find themselves in completely different situations.
Speaker 2: Well, look, it hasn't been easy, and I've had my
Speaker 2: struggles and still do. I'm just I think I fortunate.
Speaker 2: I've also been surrounded by great people.
Speaker 1: I am. I'm in awe of you. I think A
Speaker 1: you're being really vulnerable sharing what you're sharing, and I
Speaker 1: know it's looking at you and no it's not so
Speaker 1: if you want to cite no, no loves.
Speaker 2: It, get those views.
Speaker 1: Thank you for sharing. Of course that because so many nurses, paramedics,
Speaker 1: doctors have some serious mental health issues and we're all
Speaker 1: too bare, too scared, too scared of RAPERA, too afraid,
Speaker 1: too scared of the nursing Midwife board to say anything
Speaker 1: and to the detriment of us, and we put everyone
Speaker 1: else in front of us because that's what who cares.
Speaker 2: That's who we are, you know.
Speaker 1: And I think it's fantastic You've got to tribe and
Speaker 1: that you shared something so in with because that's that
Speaker 1: takes courage.
Speaker 2: Look it does, but you know it's it's not a
Speaker 2: bad but that's just my that's just me. And you know,
Speaker 2: I learned quickly that I'm not going to apologize for
Speaker 2: who I am, no matter whether it's my family, people
Speaker 2: I work for. That's one thing I won't ever have
Speaker 2: a trouble with saying no about no, this is who
Speaker 2: I am, and I'm okay with it.
Speaker 1: See, I've really, I have really struggled with the shame
Speaker 1: around drinking. And that's then you know, having a you know,
Speaker 1: total burnout and made a depression. And it's not the
Speaker 1: depression I that just is what it is, but there's
Speaker 1: such shame around it. And I've just recently started reading
Speaker 1: Giball Matt's book and I'm actually going to see him
Speaker 1: down the coast in the new year, and I came
Speaker 1: to the realization it was actually just recently that has
Speaker 1: nothing to be ashamed of. It's a pretty bloody good story.
Speaker 2: But if anything, you should be to be proud because
Speaker 2: to me, what that shows that shows strength yep, yep,
Speaker 2: and you should.
Speaker 1: Be proud and not ashamed.
Speaker 2: And not shame is such a useless emotion and it
Speaker 2: is drummed into us, and it is debilitating. But it's
Speaker 2: a social construct, and unfortunately it's also a religious construct,
Speaker 2: which really got drummed into me. And shame is useless.
Speaker 1: When you left home and I'm assuming you started doing
Speaker 1: some drag work, was that a bit of a if you?
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally, there's a big well. I had never planned
Speaker 2: to come out. I thought, let's just let's do what
Speaker 2: my family does sometimes and stick it in a box
Speaker 2: and not talk about it.
Speaker 1: Okay, yep.
Speaker 2: So when kind of that happened and it was a
Speaker 2: weight off my shoulders, I thought, you know what, if
Speaker 2: this is such a bad thing, then let's go balls
Speaker 2: to the wall. And so you did and I did,
Speaker 2: and you know, I kind of just fell into drag
Speaker 2: by gorgeous, Thank you seriously.
Speaker 1: So I can imagine you actually done up. But I
Speaker 1: think you'd be a stunny me a photo.
Speaker 2: I will, I will. My sisters hated it. They're like, oh,
Speaker 2: I hate it. You have better legs than me. I
Speaker 2: could never have.
Speaker 1: Been a drag queen legs.
Speaker 2: Oh god.
Speaker 1: Anyway, and they do, they have smoking legs.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, you know it's all an illusion.
Speaker 1: Do you? You said before that every day is making
Speaker 1: a choice.
Speaker 2: Yes.
Speaker 1: Two. So when you feel like you are overwhelmed, what
Speaker 1: do you do?
Speaker 2: Look Apart from obviously, I find breathing exercises are great
Speaker 2: for myself personally. That helps centers my thoughts because I'm
Speaker 2: an overthinker. But to be honest, my husband has been
Speaker 2: my rock, not only physically, financially, emotionally, but he's my
Speaker 2: best friend. He's who I turn to for advice. He's
Speaker 2: who I turned to to center myself. And it was
Speaker 2: an adjustment because we were married, we lived together, we
Speaker 2: work together. Oh god, how does that go look? To
Speaker 2: be honest, there were some teething issues at the start,
Speaker 2: but I wouldn't want it any other way. I actually
Speaker 2: love spending twenty four to seven with him. He's my
Speaker 2: everything and I tell him he's only continued to make
Speaker 2: me a better version of myself.
Speaker 1: But maybe you're making him a better version of him.
Speaker 2: I'd like to think so. But isn't that what a
Speaker 2: good relationship is.
Speaker 1: Absolutely, it's been able to communicate, love each other, give
Speaker 1: each other space, correct hear each.
Speaker 2: Other and I might not be I'm working on the
Speaker 2: give him space.
Speaker 1: But you know what, you're aware of it yeah, and
Speaker 1: that probably it probably goes back to feeling.
Speaker 2: Unwanted totally, and that's something that has come up in therapy.
Speaker 2: There you go, he did you just save me like
Speaker 2: three hundred dollars? I'm sorry happy.
Speaker 1: Out of everything we've chatted about, if you are a
Speaker 1: guy wanting to get into nursing, yep, what would be
Speaker 1: the best advice?
Speaker 2: First of all, why are you wanting to do it?
Speaker 2: I think, even though yes, we need more nurses, but
Speaker 2: we don't just need numbers. We need nurses that care.
Speaker 2: And unfortunately, things like bureaucracy, pay, inequity get in the
Speaker 2: way of nurses that care because at the end of
Speaker 2: the day, any form of nursing is still nursing. And
Speaker 2: I do it because of four words I ask every patient,
Speaker 2: how can I help? I just want to help people.
Speaker 1: I'm the same and I love my I love my clients,
Speaker 1: and I love my patients, and I love that I'm
Speaker 1: a nurse practitioner and can take it that next step.
Speaker 1: I really love helping my colleagues.
Speaker 2: Nothing I've seen that it's great fills.
Speaker 1: My cup up more than someone reaching out going hey
Speaker 1: can you give me a hand? Absolutely, I don't know
Speaker 1: it's it's a good feeling, but I think there's a
Speaker 1: lot that don't do it.
Speaker 2: There are, and there are a lot that aren't as
Speaker 2: humble about it. I have been on the receiving end
Speaker 2: of people with your qualification or beat doctors and really
Speaker 2: spoken down to really yeah yeah, or made to feel
Speaker 2: like I've done something wrong by just being so being yeah,
Speaker 2: taking up space and cosmetics.
Speaker 1: But you know what, some of the best, some of
Speaker 1: the best injectors, nurse practitioners, registered nurses, doctors, own, rolled,
Speaker 1: endorsed and role nurses.
Speaker 2: You know, I think it's that tortoise and the hair
Speaker 2: we've had to lack in shell way.
Speaker 1: You're probably like I, so I always I just had
Speaker 1: this mindset. I was always going to go under the radar,
Speaker 1: And you're probably exactly the same. You just spot along,
Speaker 1: you do your own thing. You've surrounded yourself with the
Speaker 1: right people, and I did. That was something I made
Speaker 1: a very conscious decision when I first started to make
Speaker 1: sure I had really good doctors and other nurses around
Speaker 1: me and mentors. I didn't listen to the rubbish on
Speaker 1: the outside. And you know what's really interesting is since
Speaker 1: the TGA ruling has come in with all the advertising,
Speaker 1: I've had more new clients since the beginning of July
Speaker 1: than I've ever had in a time period.
Speaker 2: Me too, and my socials are oh mine too. Do
Speaker 2: you know how many times I've spoken about skin and
Speaker 2: consultation is key?
Speaker 1: I know, how many times can you do it? I'm like,
Speaker 1: how many times can you talk about salmon spam?
Speaker 2: I know, I'm like, or the benefits of plasma, But it's.
Speaker 1: True, I cannot tell you.
Speaker 2: I me too. It's crazy, isn't it.
Speaker 1: And I just think people are sitting back and looking
Speaker 1: at who's doing the right thing. I think so, and
Speaker 1: they're looking at people that aren't doing the right thing
Speaker 1: on social media and game, well, why would I go
Speaker 1: to that person? We attract the people that are like us,
Speaker 1: so therefore they're going to talk about us to hopefully
Speaker 1: people that are like them, that are like us. So
Speaker 1: I have to say, and I'm sure you're the same.
Speaker 1: The new clients that are coming in are beautiful, lovely or.
Speaker 2: Just giant, genuine people.
Speaker 1: And I'm loving it because it's not someone looking at
Speaker 1: Instagram and go, oh my god, I got to see her,
Speaker 1: and then you know, they book don't show up you know,
Speaker 1: all that sort of stuff. These are genuinely lovely people
Speaker 1: that listen ware sirtation that you have with them. Understand
Speaker 1: that I might go, I'm not doing anything medically orientated.
Speaker 1: We're going to focus on your skin. First. You need
Speaker 1: to see your lease and have a skin check done.
Speaker 1: Then we might look at doing some ipl just to
Speaker 1: even your skin tone out, maybe some pills you need
Speaker 1: some retinal and then we go from there, because what's
Speaker 1: the point in shopping a heat product in someone's face
Speaker 1: with the hollyrincles when their skin looks like, you know,
Speaker 1: like an eighty year.
Speaker 2: Old beaten up Chanel handbag.
Speaker 1: Absolutely, and you don't one because you're not doing the
Speaker 1: right thing by your patients. No, you're not, because it
Speaker 1: still looks the same, except they just don't have wrinkles correct.
Speaker 1: And like, as most people know, the skin is the
Speaker 1: largest organ. Absolutely, So.
Speaker 2: Why are we taking care of appearance over organ and
Speaker 2: skin health?
Speaker 1: Absolutely? And that's why dermatology is such a complex specialty
Speaker 1: because so much impacts the skin. You know, it absorbs thing,
Speaker 1: it protects us, it moderates our temperature. It is such
Speaker 1: a complex organ and we need to really really look
Speaker 1: after our skin totally first and foremost, and then we
Speaker 1: look at that and like I say to my patients
Speaker 1: and you probably do the same, is that if your
Speaker 1: skin is healthy and fit and great healthy barrier, your product.
Speaker 2: Is going to last longer and it's going to look better. Absolutely,
Speaker 2: because at the end of the day, we're not treating
Speaker 2: aging as you know, aging skin. We're treating dehydration and
Speaker 2: we're treating a breakdown of the barrier. So if you're
Speaker 2: using the right ingredients, if you're using the right treatments,
Speaker 2: you're going to get a better result with your cosmetics.
Speaker 1: Absolutely well. On that note, I want to say thank
Speaker 1: you so much for coming in up in a way
Speaker 1: I didn't expect to go, but I love it. Thank
Speaker 1: you so much for it's my pleasure, and sorry for
Speaker 1: the couple of times we've had to not at all.
Speaker 2: That's the life of Annette.
Speaker 1: Absolutely and I've loved every second with you.
Speaker 2: Think me too. Thank you so much for that pleasure.