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Speaker 1: Apogee Production. Welcome to the She Rises Podcast. I'm Ashy

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Speaker 1: and I'm Tiana. This podcast is about female empowerment.

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Speaker 2: And encouraging you to be your biggest, boldest, and most

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Speaker 2: authentic version of yourself.

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Speaker 1: We help you shed the shame, grow to new level.

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Speaker 1: We're gonna laugh, cry, and talk about the topics everyone

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Speaker 1: else is too afraid to talk about.

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Speaker 2: Get ready for your next level of self.

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Speaker 1: Hello everybody, welcome back to she Rises. It's your host

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Speaker 1: Ashi and I'm Tiana, and today's episode is all about love.

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Speaker 1: It's a good time of year, it is. But before

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Speaker 1: we get in today's episode, what is your share of

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Speaker 1: the week?

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Speaker 2: My share of the week is actually a little meditation.

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Speaker 2: So this is something so Anita, ash and I have

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Speaker 2: been talking about this lots recently and we both have

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Speaker 2: been using it like NonStop. It's this little twelve minute

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Speaker 2: meditation that I used before bed and it is the

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Speaker 2: best thing like it ever knocks me out. I go

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Speaker 2: to sleep straight way. I honestly, sometimes I'm asleep before

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Speaker 2: the twelve minutes is up every time.

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Speaker 1: To me, every single time I put it on last

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Speaker 1: night and I cannot believe I couldn't tell you what

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Speaker 1: he says at the end of it, because I've never

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Speaker 1: made it through. It's the best.

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Speaker 2: It's so good, and so I'll put it into the

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Speaker 2: description notes for the episode so you guys can listen

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Speaker 2: to it. It's honestly a game changer, and it just

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Speaker 2: makes you wake up feeling so refreshed in the morning,

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Speaker 2: like you actually had a really good, regulated night sleep.

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Speaker 1: Even the nights where I feel my mind is busy

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Speaker 1: or I've got lots on, or I feel I'm going

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Speaker 1: to have a bad sleep, maybe I'm just overtired or something.

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Speaker 1: I put that on guarantee you have a good sleep,

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Speaker 1: and guarantee I cannot remember it's finishing. Yeah, it's the best.

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Speaker 1: I used to sleep with rain sound on, but now

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Speaker 1: because I fall asleep before it finished, I don't have

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Speaker 1: my rain sound on anymore.

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Speaker 2: Wake up, I'm like, oh, yes, that's a Tracy use

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Speaker 2: white noise machine, and I'm just meditation because I like

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Speaker 2: what you said. If I'm disregulated, I'm just like, put

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Speaker 2: it on straight away and I know I'll be regulated

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Speaker 2: and calm the next day.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I love it.

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Speaker 2: Ye.

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Speaker 1: My Share of the Week is a beautiful girl called Taylor.

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Speaker 1: She used to be my graphic designer and a friend

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Speaker 1: of mine still a friend of mine. Absolutely love her.

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Speaker 1: If you guys have been following for a little while,

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Speaker 1: she worked for me for around four years and she's

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Speaker 1: a motorbike rider and an incredible one at that. She teaches.

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Speaker 1: She actually left my company to go and teach women

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Speaker 1: how to ride motorbikes and empower them in a very

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Speaker 1: male dominated sport. And she was selling merch and she

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Speaker 1: was doing competitions and if you could see her on

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Speaker 1: a motorbike, it's crazy, Like I'm talking flips in the air.

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Speaker 1: She's insane, very inspiring. Just watching her leave her nine

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Speaker 1: to five job really and go and live out her

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Speaker 1: dreams was really really special. But unfortunately, about four months

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Speaker 1: ago now, she had a motorbike accident and she currently

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Speaker 1: can't walk. So she obviously her spine, she broke ribs,

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Speaker 1: she broke both arms. She was in hospital for I

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Speaker 1: think nearly three months, and she is so determined to

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Speaker 1: walk again, and if anyone can do it, I wholeheartily

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Speaker 1: believe she can. Obviously, her will got completely flipped upside

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Speaker 1: down and it's been a really fucking hard time for her.

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Speaker 1: So there was a go fund me account that we're

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Speaker 1: all raising money for. She had to sell her house

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Speaker 1: and move, and there's so much rehab bills and medical

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Speaker 1: bills that she's obviously not working anymore either. So I

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Speaker 1: would really love all of our She Rises community to

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Speaker 1: dig deep, even if it's only five dollars or ten dollars,

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Speaker 1: if you skip your morning coffee this week, just to

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Speaker 1: put towards helping her on her recovery journey, because it's

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Speaker 1: going to be a long one. She can now get

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Speaker 1: little tingles in her legs, which is a great sign

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Speaker 1: of progress and that her brain's starting to connect back

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Speaker 1: to her loobber body. But yeah, it's a long journey ahead. Wow. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's really sad story. She's amazing, She's very determined and

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Speaker 1: strong willed and got a really strong mindset, but this

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Speaker 1: has really knocked her around. So it'd be awesome if

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Speaker 1: we can all get behind her.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I love that. Thank you for sharing that.

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Speaker 1: Thank you. Alrighty, let's get into the episode. So February

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Speaker 1: fourteenth is Valentine's Day. We actually have our first Gallantine's

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Speaker 1: event coming up, which is a sold event. Oh, which

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Speaker 1: reminds me when need to talk about our next event. Sorry, yeah, surprise.

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Speaker 1: We booked at our first one within seventy two hours,

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Speaker 1: which blew our minds but really exciting. We're so excited.

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Speaker 1: So kind of got us thinking, shit, we should start

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Speaker 1: planning our next event because so many girls miss out

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Speaker 1: on this one. So we were thinking we brainstorm. We

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Speaker 1: spend every Wednesday together all on Sheer Rises, and we're

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Speaker 1: not going to give too much away for this event.

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Speaker 1: It's a bit of a mystery. So the girls that

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Speaker 1: are going to come to this event, you don't actually

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Speaker 1: know what you're really coming into. We're going to give

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Speaker 1: you a theme, we're going to give little hints as

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Speaker 1: to what the night's about, but you won't fully know

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Speaker 1: what you're doing until you come. So this is for

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Speaker 1: the girls who are brave, are ready to step outside

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Speaker 1: the comfort zone. They know much growth they get when

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Speaker 1: they're surrounded by like minded women and they're being challenged

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Speaker 1: in a really positive, supportive way. Some of the exercises

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Speaker 1: we'll be doing you probably have never done before, but

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Speaker 1: they've been game changing for us. But it's all going

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Speaker 1: to be very, very playful.

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Speaker 2: This is very much the event for the women who

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Speaker 2: are growth seekers. They're excited by the growth. They're excited

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Speaker 2: by exploring themselves and being able to seek the understanding

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Speaker 2: of themselves. It's a little bit edgy, it's a little

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Speaker 2: bit out there. It may challenge you, but if you

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Speaker 2: seek the growth, you will love that challenge.

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Speaker 1: If you loved your episode introducing Tatiana and Stephanie, this

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Speaker 1: is the event for you. You listen to that and

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Speaker 1: you were thinking, oh, I can work on that. I

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Speaker 1: can see how I show up over here or there,

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Speaker 1: and it just was almost a lightbulb moment for you.

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Speaker 1: This is a kind of event for you. It's going

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Speaker 1: to be intimate. Again, we want this to be really intimate.

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Speaker 1: We might increase numbers by ten because the venue that

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Speaker 1: we're looking at is slightly larger, but these events are

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Speaker 1: never going to be really large because we want to

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Speaker 1: be able to hold the space. Feel all really well,

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Speaker 1: I'm so excited for it.

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Speaker 2: Really, you should have heard us when we were talking

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Speaker 2: about it. We were popping off. It was like, actually

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Speaker 2: had an idea, I had an idea. We were bouncing

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Speaker 2: off each other and it just built into this beautiful

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Speaker 2: thing and we were like, all right, done.

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Speaker 1: We are releasing tickets the day after at Valentine's Day event,

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Speaker 1: So that will be on Valentine's Day is when I'm

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Speaker 1: going to release the tickets. We're pencil it in anyway,

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Speaker 1: that's our plan. I get come along. Yeah, it's so

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Speaker 1: exciting to have to meet Ashi Rise's community face to face. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so that's our little West. So excited. Yeah, we're very excited.

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Speaker 1: We just had to talk about it. So Valentine's Day,

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Speaker 1: let's talk about it. Because I think it's a day

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Speaker 1: that a lot of people love to celebrate, and it's

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Speaker 1: also a day a lot of people are like, oh, cringe,

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Speaker 1: and it can bring up a lot of things, including loneliness.

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Speaker 1: Have you ever felt that on Valentine's Day? Like really lonely? Oh? Absolutely.

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Speaker 2: There have been times where I've had Valentine's Day come

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Speaker 2: up and It'd be a couple of weeks away and

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Speaker 2: I'd be pre empting in my head. I don't have

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Speaker 2: a partner this year? Yeah, oh my god, what am

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Speaker 2: I going to do? And the pressure I put on

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Speaker 2: myself to be like, why don't you have a relationship yet?

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Speaker 1: What's wrong?

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Speaker 2: We've found the fairy tale ending, the love of your life.

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Speaker 2: Why haven't you been there yet? So Yeah, there have

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Speaker 2: definitely been times where I've had that.

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Speaker 1: So on those years that you were by yourself, can

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Speaker 1: you walk me through when you had done the work

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Speaker 1: and you weren't so concerned what other people thought of you?

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Speaker 1: What Valentine's Day look like for you? Would you celebrate yourself?

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Speaker 1: Would you celebrate with girlfriends? Would you buy yourself a rose?

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Speaker 1: Walk me through it? Oh? I love that question.

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Speaker 2: The best part for me was making it intimate, no

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Speaker 2: matter who was around. And I've mentioned this before, whether

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Speaker 2: there had been periods in my life where you know,

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Speaker 2: you lose friends and then you don't really have anybody

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Speaker 2: around and you're going through this understanding phase of yourself.

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Speaker 2: And in those moments where let's say maybe I didn't

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Speaker 2: have a lot of close friends, or i'd have a partner,

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Speaker 2: I would make the day about me. I love that,

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Speaker 2: and it would be receiving. So I'd go and buy

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Speaker 2: myself some roses because they'd make me happy, Like flowers

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Speaker 2: any woman who knows a feeling, They just make me

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Speaker 2: so happy.

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Speaker 1: It's the whole experience.

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Speaker 2: It's being able to see them every time you walk

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Speaker 2: past them. They made you happy, make you smile, they

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Speaker 2: remind you of someone you love and yourself in this case,

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Speaker 2: and so it would be about, all right, well I

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Speaker 2: love these things, why wouldn't I give those things to myself.

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Speaker 2: So instead of having someone serenade me, I serenade myself,

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Speaker 2: love it, and buy myself some flowers, buy myself my

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Speaker 2: favorite chocolates, which is local loves for anybody who he

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Speaker 2: doesn't know, and just cooking myself a really beautiful, like

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Speaker 2: wholesome meal.

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Speaker 1: That's nice. From my perspective. I've had a partner for

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Speaker 1: the last seventeen years. I more got stuck in the

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Speaker 1: comparison of what other people are receiving, how they're celebrating

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Speaker 1: their partner, putting more effort in me, putting more effort

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Speaker 1: in expectations that I had on Steve, on how I

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Speaker 1: wanted him to show up. And we've been together seventeen

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Speaker 1: years this June, so we've learned along the way how

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Speaker 1: not to get stuck into that, because if he wouldn't

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Speaker 1: book something, or buy me something or do something, I

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Speaker 1: would then be disappointed because I had expectations. So we

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Speaker 1: decided a couple of years ago that we would alternate

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Speaker 1: planning Valentine's Day. So I've done this for a few

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Speaker 1: years now where he would do one year and I

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Speaker 1: get the pleasure of being surprised and taken care of,

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Speaker 1: and he spoils me and loves on me and all

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Speaker 1: the things that I don't have to do anything. But equally,

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Speaker 1: I love gift giving. I loved giving my time, I

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Speaker 1: love organizing thing, access service, I love doing all of

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Speaker 1: that my loved one. So the following year, I get

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Speaker 1: to do that and he gets to relax knowing that's

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Speaker 1: all taken care of, and he gets to enjoy being

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Speaker 1: surprised as well. It took away all the expectations, it

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Speaker 1: took away any resentment, and we thoroughly look forward to

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Speaker 1: it every single year now. And we'll also discuss each year,

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Speaker 1: Like you said to me the other day, are we

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Speaker 1: doing gifts this year or do we rather pour more

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Speaker 1: money into an experience? Yeah, so I said, I'd rather experience.

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Speaker 1: Let's put more money into like going away for a

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Speaker 1: night and going and doing something beautiful together over getting

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Speaker 1: a gift. Because we just had Christmas studied on my birthday.

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Speaker 1: So it's just once again communication. But that's the trap

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Speaker 1: that I remember getting stuck into. And even if it

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Speaker 1: was just someone online and you see their partners filled

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Speaker 1: a whole hotel room with a million rows, and like,

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Speaker 1: why did I get that Steve brtty moment? But now

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Speaker 1: I don't get any of that And if I see that,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, amazing, beautiful. But I genuinely love doing that

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Speaker 1: for Steve and whatever he plans is perfect and beauty before.

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Speaker 1: And I think now as I've gotten older and matured

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Speaker 1: as well, I just really love the quality time we get.

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Speaker 1: It's a day that we can allocate or a night

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Speaker 1: that we can allocate and book in a babysitter. It

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Speaker 1: not forces you to, but kind of it's a reason

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Speaker 1: to celebrate your love and remember why you love each

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Speaker 1: other and to love on each other extra that day.

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Speaker 1: And I think that's really cool. But what I hear

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Speaker 1: from women a lot is that they're really lonely and

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Speaker 1: they don't have girlfriends and they don't have a partner,

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Speaker 1: and it's a day that brings up those emotions that

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Speaker 1: I'm not good enough, what's wrong with me? And that's

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Speaker 1: why we want to do the Galentine's event as well,

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Speaker 1: is to bring women together to celebrate each other and

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Speaker 1: to show how important sisterhood is and that you can

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Speaker 1: love on others and you can love on yourself, and

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Speaker 1: you actually get to make Valentine's Day whatever you want

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Speaker 1: it to be, and doesn't matter what everyone else is doing.

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Speaker 2: It doesn't have to just be about, like you know,

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Speaker 2: the expectations of how people show on social media. It

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Speaker 2: doesn't have to just be about that. It can be

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Speaker 2: more about the representation of love. Yes, no matter who

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Speaker 2: that's with, whether it's with the relationship, whether that's with

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Speaker 2: your girlfriends, whether that's to yourself. And I think that's

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Speaker 2: the of it. This day gets to represent whatever it

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Speaker 2: is that you want it to represent, and so you

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Speaker 2: get to show up however it is that you please.

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Speaker 2: And even I believe even if you do experience loneliness

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Speaker 2: on that day, it's actually a blessing because it's actually

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Speaker 2: showing you. Let's say, for example, if you're not in

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Speaker 2: a relationship yet, there's a part of you that's really

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Speaker 2: desiring that, but to show love to the parts of

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Speaker 2: yourself that feels like you're in lack being able to

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Speaker 2: look at those parts within you and love on those

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Speaker 2: parts so that when your partner does come in, you're

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Speaker 2: not seeking from a place of lack. You're going. I

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Speaker 2: actually am fulfilled within myself first and foremost. Then when

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Speaker 2: my partner comes overflows, it's so much overflow. Yeah, that

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Speaker 2: such a clean place for it to come from. And

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Speaker 2: I truly believe these moments where we get triggered and

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Speaker 2: these things come up for us and we have loneliness

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Speaker 2: come up. Loneliness is a big one. We can have

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Speaker 2: a whole podcast episode on that, but really feeling into

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Speaker 2: those loneliness feelings or to come up because you could

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Speaker 2: be in a relationship and feel so lonely. Yeah, so

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Speaker 2: surrounded by a group of friends and family and still

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Speaker 2: feel so lonely.

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Speaker 1: Because there's things going on internally for you, in your heart,

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Speaker 1: your mind.

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Speaker 2: But the lesson, you're right, The lesson in that is

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Speaker 2: to look at those things you love on those parts,

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Speaker 2: not make them wrong for being there. And every single

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Speaker 2: time that you do that, they will dissolve a little

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Speaker 2: and you'll get to have a better experience next year.

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Speaker 1: I had a question about jealousy come through the other day.

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Speaker 1: It was after we have released the episode introducing two

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Speaker 1: new co hosts. If you haven't listened to that, please

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Speaker 1: go back and listen to it because the whole theory

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Speaker 1: around the two new co hosts and our alter egos

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Speaker 1: and how much it's helped and healed so many parts

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Speaker 1: about ourselves is really beautiful. But I had a woman

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Speaker 1: rite in asking about jealousy and how she really suppresses it.

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Speaker 1: Jealousy is a low vibration to feel. It never feels

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Speaker 1: good when we feel jealous. But if that ever comes

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Speaker 1: up for me, which it used to come up a lot,

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Speaker 1: I used to feel it all the time, Not so

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Speaker 1: much anymore. But if it ever does, all is highlighting

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Speaker 1: is what you're wanting, It really is. Yeah, if you're

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Speaker 1: getting jealous of seeing a half a couple, remember also,

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Speaker 1: social media is a highlight. It's a place where a

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Speaker 1: lot of people do show just their high time. So

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Speaker 1: please try not to compare your low days or you're

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Speaker 1: okay days with someone's best day of their life. But

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Speaker 1: when it does come up for me, I'm like, oh, okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm wanting more of that in my life. How can

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Speaker 1: I get that? Where do I get that from? How

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Speaker 1: can I bring that in more? How can I request

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Speaker 1: that more from my partner? How can I invite that

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Speaker 1: more in my friendships or even if it's business. I

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Speaker 1: get stuck in the comparison of business. Sometimes, Okay, what

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Speaker 1: do I need to do to get to that level?

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Speaker 1: Where am I not showing up? Where am I not

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Speaker 1: putting energy into it? Where do I need to study more?

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Speaker 1: Where do I need to be more persistent? And it

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Speaker 1: brings up all of that, and then sometimes I'm like

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Speaker 1: having this conversation with myself do I really want it?

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Speaker 1: Was it a moment of jealousy or is it actually

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Speaker 1: really important to me? And Okay, now I'm going to

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Speaker 1: put an action plan in place, and once I'm making

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Speaker 1: a little bit of progress, the jealousy, honestly it's gone.

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Speaker 1: So next time it comes up, don't shame yourself for it.

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Speaker 1: We all feel it, every single person, but really lean

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Speaker 1: into it and inquire more, unpack it more.

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Speaker 2: Such a powerful way to look at things as well,

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Speaker 2: because it's such a forward focused way of dealing with

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Speaker 2: your emotions instead of going sitting in the feeling and

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Speaker 2: maybe even fearing it or wanting to run away from

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Speaker 2: it or trying to hide it not only from others

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Speaker 2: but from yourself and going I don't want to feel this,

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Speaker 2: I don't want to be this person. It's just not

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Speaker 2: putting pressure on yourself to be a certain way, just

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Speaker 2: giving yourself permission to be going permission. All I actually

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Speaker 2: need to do is to just do something different or

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Speaker 2: add something in that. I'm really cravingly down, how beautiful?

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Speaker 1: Is that? So cool? And sometimes I've had thoughts of oh,

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Speaker 1: I shouldn't want that, or I should be grateful for

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Speaker 1: what I have. There is nothing wrong with wanting more.

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Speaker 1: There isn't why shame people on wanting more money, on

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Speaker 1: wanting more love, on wanting more friendships, and wanting more

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Speaker 1: shiny things. Yeah, there is nothing wrong with you wanting more.

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Speaker 1: I think deep down we want to know that we're

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Speaker 1: always enough whereas that coming from. But there should be

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Speaker 1: no shame around wanting more. You're allowed to have more.

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Speaker 1: Why can't you have more? And that's a cool thing

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Speaker 1: to explore as well, because I used to think and

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Speaker 1: growing up, I remember my stepdad always was around food.

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Speaker 1: But you should be grateful. There's starving children in Africa.

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Speaker 1: It made me feel bad for wanting a different meal

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Speaker 1: or wanting more food, or not wanting what was on

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Speaker 1: my plate. But you're actually allowed to want different things

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Speaker 1: and we shouldn't be chained for that.

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Speaker 2: I love that conversation. That's incredible, and I experience that

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Speaker 2: in my own way as well. But in relationships, say,

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Speaker 2: if I was in a relationship that I was maybe

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Speaker 2: not happy in or not fully fulfilled in and gaslighting

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Speaker 2: myself for being like, you're not allowed to want more.

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Speaker 2: You should be happy with what you've got it, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: doesn't get angry at me, doesn't yell at me.

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Speaker 1: Feel worse off?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, people are worse off. People have relationships that they're

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Speaker 2: terrified in. Yes, I'm like, oh, should be grateful that

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Speaker 2: he's kind, nice and treats you well. Then it does

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Speaker 2: you almost make yourself feel guilty about well, you should

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Speaker 2: be so grateful. But you can be grateful for what

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Speaker 2: you've got and still want more one hundred percent.

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Speaker 1: I absolutely love that. So freaking cool. Another thing I

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Speaker 1: quickly want to touch on and I have done a

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Speaker 1: previous episode about this, but love language is absolute game changer.

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Speaker 1: Who is the author of the book, Gary Chapman. If

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Speaker 1: you can read it amazing otherwise, just go on to

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Speaker 1: his website and you can do a test to see

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Speaker 1: what your love language is. There's five of them. There's

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Speaker 1: physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, gifts and

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Speaker 1: your favorite quality time? Quality time? How did I forget it?

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Speaker 1: So there's five and they'll normally be one driving one.

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Speaker 1: We love them all, don't get me wrong. I always

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Speaker 1: joke to Steve, but I'm like, I want more words

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Speaker 1: and gifts and this, and that's like you want it all?

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Speaker 2: Yes, absolutely absolutely shame around wanting more.

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Speaker 1: Yes, but you'll find the way that you want to

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Speaker 1: receive love is normally the way you naturally give it.

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Speaker 1: And these love languages can change all the time. And

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Speaker 1: I once read and I feel this is somewhat true.

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Speaker 1: A lot of the time, what we're craving more of

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Speaker 1: is what we haven't had as a child. So for

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Speaker 1: mine for years was access service. And my parents didn't,

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Speaker 1: I suppose, do a lot for me. Yes, they provided

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Speaker 1: a roof, and I'm not coming on here saying negative

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Speaker 1: things about them, but you know, when it comes to

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Speaker 1: having help with my homework, or driving me to my

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Speaker 1: dance class, or helping me pack my lunch, or be

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Speaker 1: the mom or dad that volunteers at school camp or something,

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Speaker 1: I felt like I didn't get a lot of access

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Speaker 1: service and I really had to grow up quite fast

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Speaker 1: and take care of myself, which I'm very grateful for

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Speaker 1: because it's given me amazing work ethics. So by complaining

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Speaker 1: before Annie Karen's come at me. However, when I was

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Speaker 1: pregnant with Tala, Steve just stepped into this access service,

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Speaker 1: just took care of absolutely everything. And then all of

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Speaker 1: a sudden, I was like, I'd feel like I need

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Speaker 1: that anymore, but I'm not getting as much physical touch.

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Speaker 1: So that then went at the top.

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Speaker 2: Like scratch that each yeah, yeah, like oh I feel

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Speaker 2: content in this yes.

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Speaker 1: And then for Steve it was always a physical touch.

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Speaker 1: Now he's got two children and a dog and a cat.

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Speaker 1: You should see us on the couch night. They are

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Speaker 1: all on him, including me, and by the end of

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Speaker 1: the night, he's so touched out. And I remember having

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Speaker 1: this conversation with him because I was feeling like I

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Speaker 1: wasn't getting a lot of touch from him and I

401
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Speaker 1: wanted more. So I opened up to it and I thought,

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Speaker 1: do you just feel touched out? By the end of

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Speaker 1: the night, everyone's on top of you. No, wonder you

404
00:18:19,761 --> 00:18:22,160
Speaker 1: aren't as touchy anymore. And he says, yeah, to be honest, babe,

405
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Speaker 1: all animals don't stop cuddling me. Tala's on me, Taj

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Speaker 1: is on me. It's just it's a lot sometimes and

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Speaker 1: I love it, but I don't find I crave anymore.

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Speaker 1: So now his has gone for physical touch to words. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and mine's gone from access service to physical touch. So

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Speaker 1: it's interesting to check in often. But the reason I

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Speaker 1: want to bring it up for Valentine's Day is just

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Speaker 1: to be aware to not just do what you would

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Speaker 1: like to receive, check in with what theirs is, because say,

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Speaker 1: if yours is gift, you shower them with gifts, but

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Speaker 1: all they want is your presence and quality time. They

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Speaker 1: might not feel loved from the gifts because it's not

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Speaker 1: important to them. I remember going to a Tony Robins

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Speaker 1: event and he said a common thing when people are

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Speaker 1: going through breakups, you'll hear people say, is but I

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Speaker 1: did everything for them, And he said, you did everything

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Speaker 1: but what they wanted. You did everything you think they

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Speaker 1: wanted because in your head, you're giving love the way

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Speaker 1: that you want to receive it. It's actually not selfish,

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Speaker 1: but kind of you actually checked in with what they

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Speaker 1: needed and what they wanted. It's probably the opposite of

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Speaker 1: what you're actually doing. You're coming from a good place,

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Speaker 1: but if you're sharing them with lots and lots of gifts,

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Speaker 1: and they don't give a shit about gifts. They just

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Speaker 1: want your time or they just want to be hugged

430
00:19:28,721 --> 00:19:30,680
Speaker 1: and held more often a like little kisses or taps

431
00:19:30,721 --> 00:19:33,080
Speaker 1: on the button and have that physical touch. It's really

432
00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:36,001
Speaker 1: important to know what their love language is because.

433
00:19:35,801 --> 00:19:38,081
Speaker 2: Love can get missed that way because it's like, well,

434
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:40,080
Speaker 2: you are, You're both putting in so much effort, but

435
00:19:40,120 --> 00:19:41,881
Speaker 2: if it's not being received in the way that they

436
00:19:41,961 --> 00:19:45,240
Speaker 2: need to risk or that they put in importance on

437
00:19:45,360 --> 00:19:48,321
Speaker 2: receiving less, they're going to miss all the effort they

438
00:19:48,321 --> 00:19:50,600
Speaker 2: are putting in because to you, it's like, oh my god,

439
00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:53,321
Speaker 2: I'm going above and beyond. But to that person, Ye're like,

440
00:19:53,761 --> 00:19:56,281
Speaker 2: I appreciate the effort, but it doesn't hit the same

441
00:19:56,321 --> 00:19:58,001
Speaker 2: as what it would if I was getting in the

442
00:19:58,001 --> 00:20:01,521
Speaker 2: way that I need and crave. Yes, I definitely can

443
00:20:01,561 --> 00:20:04,480
Speaker 2: resonate with that I experienced that I feel in my

444
00:20:04,681 --> 00:20:08,160
Speaker 2: last relationship. I feel like he was very big on

445
00:20:08,281 --> 00:20:12,041
Speaker 2: acts of service, but at the time my love language

446
00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:16,721
Speaker 2: was words of affirmation and physical touch, but his wasn't

447
00:20:16,801 --> 00:20:20,120
Speaker 2: physical touch. And so even that is anyone who's listening

448
00:20:20,120 --> 00:20:23,601
Speaker 2: to who navigates that knowing that you have different love

449
00:20:23,721 --> 00:20:27,881
Speaker 2: languages and knowing how to deal with them navigate them, yes,

450
00:20:28,281 --> 00:20:30,801
Speaker 2: while still meeting each other, you know. And I think

451
00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:33,760
Speaker 2: that was a really interesting thing for me because throughout

452
00:20:33,840 --> 00:20:37,521
Speaker 2: that relationship I noticed that my love language has changed

453
00:20:37,600 --> 00:20:40,480
Speaker 2: within that relationship. For all my life it had been

454
00:20:40,521 --> 00:20:43,160
Speaker 2: words of affirmation and physical touch, and then as I

455
00:20:43,201 --> 00:20:46,480
Speaker 2: started to learn to receive love in that way, it was,

456
00:20:46,801 --> 00:20:49,160
Speaker 2: oh wow, I really love when people do things for

457
00:20:49,241 --> 00:20:51,801
Speaker 2: me and they acts of service and they're supporting me

458
00:20:51,840 --> 00:20:55,321
Speaker 2: in that way. So it's just funny how different people

459
00:20:55,321 --> 00:20:57,360
Speaker 2: can bring out different things in you as well.

460
00:20:58,160 --> 00:21:00,880
Speaker 1: Definitely three his joke how much easier it would be

461
00:21:00,880 --> 00:21:02,721
Speaker 1: in a relationship if you just had the same love language,

462
00:21:02,721 --> 00:21:04,721
Speaker 1: because you wuld naturally just do it. But that's why

463
00:21:04,721 --> 00:21:07,241
Speaker 1: it's important to constantly check in because as you change

464
00:21:07,241 --> 00:21:09,920
Speaker 1: and evolve and your scenarios or your dynamics adding more

465
00:21:10,001 --> 00:21:13,281
Speaker 1: children or time and energy with work or stress, so

466
00:21:13,441 --> 00:21:15,921
Speaker 1: till with the love language. So checking once a month.

467
00:21:16,120 --> 00:21:18,601
Speaker 1: My friend Levi, he's been in a relationship, I think

468
00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:21,920
Speaker 1: nearly twelve years now. His partner's love language is words

469
00:21:21,921 --> 00:21:23,801
Speaker 1: of affirmation, and that was on the bottom of the

470
00:21:23,801 --> 00:21:26,321
Speaker 1: list for him. He actually set reminders because he loves

471
00:21:26,360 --> 00:21:29,121
Speaker 1: this woman so freakin' much and would do anything for her.

472
00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:31,200
Speaker 1: He was like, I need to find a system and

473
00:21:31,241 --> 00:21:34,041
Speaker 1: a solution to this because she constantly feels not loved

474
00:21:34,041 --> 00:21:35,680
Speaker 1: for me, even though I love her so much and

475
00:21:35,761 --> 00:21:38,241
Speaker 1: I do everything else. It's words for her. So he

476
00:21:38,321 --> 00:21:41,561
Speaker 1: actually set reminders in his phone to send text messages

477
00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:43,400
Speaker 1: and to go and give her words. And the words

478
00:21:43,441 --> 00:21:45,401
Speaker 1: were there for him, they just didn't naturally come out.

479
00:21:45,481 --> 00:21:47,360
Speaker 1: He said. He used to think it, but he didn't

480
00:21:47,441 --> 00:21:49,921
Speaker 1: verbalize it. So he set these alarms in his phone

481
00:21:49,921 --> 00:21:51,480
Speaker 1: and he did it for nearly two years until it

482
00:21:51,521 --> 00:21:52,120
Speaker 1: became a habit.

483
00:21:52,241 --> 00:21:52,641
Speaker 2: Wow.

484
00:21:52,761 --> 00:21:55,241
Speaker 1: I was like, that is committed love. I think that's beautiful,

485
00:21:55,281 --> 00:21:56,801
Speaker 1: And a lot of people might listen to that and say, oh,

486
00:21:56,801 --> 00:21:58,921
Speaker 1: we shouldn't have to set an alarm. If you love

487
00:21:58,961 --> 00:22:01,041
Speaker 1: that person that much and do feel natural and you're

488
00:22:01,041 --> 00:22:03,561
Speaker 1: struggling to do it and it constantly comes up and

489
00:22:03,640 --> 00:22:06,440
Speaker 1: causes little icky moments and your partner's not feeling loved,

490
00:22:07,041 --> 00:22:08,080
Speaker 1: that's a cool way to do it.

491
00:22:08,241 --> 00:22:08,481
Speaker 2: Yeah.

492
00:22:08,561 --> 00:22:10,240
Speaker 1: I love that. I love how committed he was to

493
00:22:10,321 --> 00:22:11,401
Speaker 1: making sure she felt love.

494
00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:14,440
Speaker 2: It's choosing the path of least resistance to be able

495
00:22:14,521 --> 00:22:17,840
Speaker 2: to make what it is you're choosing better and a

496
00:22:17,840 --> 00:22:19,680
Speaker 2: better experience for both you and your partner. I think

497
00:22:19,681 --> 00:22:22,401
Speaker 2: that's such a beautiful thing, and even that in itself

498
00:22:22,521 --> 00:22:26,241
Speaker 2: is the effort to being able to be like, hey,

499
00:22:26,321 --> 00:22:29,240
Speaker 2: I really see you, I hear you, I understand what

500
00:22:29,241 --> 00:22:30,880
Speaker 2: it is you're needing, and I'm willing to give that

501
00:22:30,921 --> 00:22:32,840
Speaker 2: to you. I think that for a lot of women,

502
00:22:32,880 --> 00:22:35,400
Speaker 2: I could only really speak for myself, but would go

503
00:22:35,521 --> 00:22:40,321
Speaker 2: such a long way and consideration, safety, all of those things.

504
00:22:40,561 --> 00:22:43,200
Speaker 1: I remember one year Steve got my girlfriend Megsie to

505
00:22:43,201 --> 00:22:45,641
Speaker 1: help with Christmas presents, and there was a lot of them.

506
00:22:45,681 --> 00:22:47,400
Speaker 1: But when I found out that Megsie had gone and

507
00:22:47,441 --> 00:22:50,041
Speaker 1: bought them, I was a bit disappointed because it was

508
00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:53,041
Speaker 1: that act of service and the energy and the thought

509
00:22:53,080 --> 00:22:54,600
Speaker 1: that I thought Steve had gone to do all of

510
00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:56,880
Speaker 1: that for me. Yeah, that I then felt disappointed. I

511
00:22:56,921 --> 00:22:58,680
Speaker 1: remember communicating that with him because he was like, but

512
00:22:58,681 --> 00:23:00,801
Speaker 1: I've got so many beautiful gifts, and I was like,

513
00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:03,641
Speaker 1: I know, but it's actually the thought of you going

514
00:23:03,681 --> 00:23:06,240
Speaker 1: to do that for me, you thinking about what I like,

515
00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:09,680
Speaker 1: that means most. That's more sentimental to me, and he's like, ah,

516
00:23:10,041 --> 00:23:11,761
Speaker 1: I get it, I get it. But in his head

517
00:23:11,801 --> 00:23:13,160
Speaker 1: he was like, oh, I'm going to shout with her

518
00:23:13,201 --> 00:23:15,960
Speaker 1: all these amazing gifts his her girlfriend, who knows her amazing,

519
00:23:16,001 --> 00:23:17,600
Speaker 1: he knows makeup and all the girly stuff. She'll do

520
00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:19,400
Speaker 1: a better job of it than me. But I was like,

521
00:23:20,001 --> 00:23:23,561
Speaker 1: missed it there, appreciate it, yes, but I want you

522
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:25,120
Speaker 1: to put the effort in and the thought in, and

523
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:27,001
Speaker 1: that means more to me. It was a really cool

524
00:23:27,001 --> 00:23:29,641
Speaker 1: conversation because he was like, wow, may get it so wrong.

525
00:23:29,681 --> 00:23:35,121
Speaker 1: Sometimes feedback taken. Yes. So we thought we'd finish off

526
00:23:35,120 --> 00:23:38,481
Speaker 1: the episode with two things that we've both learned from

527
00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:41,840
Speaker 1: when we were single to being in a relationship. I

528
00:23:41,961 --> 00:23:44,721
Speaker 1: learned very early on that I am a lover girl.

529
00:23:44,921 --> 00:23:47,920
Speaker 1: I'm a relationship girlie. I really wanted to find my

530
00:23:48,041 --> 00:23:50,921
Speaker 1: person and grow with them and go through the hard

531
00:23:50,921 --> 00:23:53,121
Speaker 1: times with them and share my whole life with them.

532
00:23:53,561 --> 00:23:55,240
Speaker 1: I had a period where I had a boyfriend when

533
00:23:55,281 --> 00:23:58,600
Speaker 1: I was quite young, from maybe fifteen for three and

534
00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:00,681
Speaker 1: a bit years, and I had about a six month

535
00:24:00,681 --> 00:24:02,761
Speaker 1: period of being single, and I thought when I broke

536
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:05,881
Speaker 1: up with him, I was like whoa five times, I'm

537
00:24:05,921 --> 00:24:07,920
Speaker 1: going to love this. I'm going to sleep around and

538
00:24:07,961 --> 00:24:12,080
Speaker 1: be like a bit naughty and tryal the things, and yeah,

539
00:24:12,281 --> 00:24:16,440
Speaker 1: miserably failed at that was not that girl wanted to like.

540
00:24:16,561 --> 00:24:18,641
Speaker 1: It just wasn't in me, And I really learned how

541
00:24:18,681 --> 00:24:22,920
Speaker 1: much I value connection and safety with a person. To

542
00:24:23,001 --> 00:24:26,640
Speaker 1: be intimate and to have sex especially, I really needed

543
00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:29,200
Speaker 1: them to mean something to me and for there to

544
00:24:29,201 --> 00:24:32,880
Speaker 1: be that connection and that feeling safe to be comfortable

545
00:24:33,001 --> 00:24:37,641
Speaker 1: to do that and to let someone in literally trying

546
00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:39,960
Speaker 1: to find another word for that, but yeah, I mean yeah,

547
00:24:40,441 --> 00:24:43,360
Speaker 1: So I learned that very very quickly, and single life

548
00:24:43,441 --> 00:24:46,160
Speaker 1: just wasn't for me. And still just connection is just

549
00:24:46,201 --> 00:24:48,840
Speaker 1: my highest highest value. Whereas I know a lot of

550
00:24:48,840 --> 00:24:51,481
Speaker 1: people love being single and exploring different people. I can

551
00:24:51,521 --> 00:24:54,920
Speaker 1: see how they love that and that's awesome, But for me,

552
00:24:54,961 --> 00:24:56,761
Speaker 1: I really wanted to find my person and go through

553
00:24:56,801 --> 00:24:58,161
Speaker 1: life with them. Yeah.

554
00:24:58,160 --> 00:25:00,401
Speaker 2: It is such a sacred act as well, especially when

555
00:25:00,441 --> 00:25:02,161
Speaker 2: you have such a high value of connection.

556
00:25:02,801 --> 00:25:05,160
Speaker 1: I've got some girlfriends who I'm really close with, and

557
00:25:05,201 --> 00:25:08,760
Speaker 1: they love sleeping around. It's just sex, yeah, but for me,

558
00:25:08,801 --> 00:25:11,121
Speaker 1: it's just more than that. I don't know, I have

559
00:25:11,201 --> 00:25:15,080
Speaker 1: to feel for that person otherwise almost feel like a

560
00:25:15,120 --> 00:25:17,760
Speaker 1: toy or something. Yeah, I don't know even that.

561
00:25:17,801 --> 00:25:22,000
Speaker 2: It's like everyone has the different meaning, tensions, expectations on

562
00:25:22,400 --> 00:25:25,041
Speaker 2: what that act gives and provides.

563
00:25:25,201 --> 00:25:27,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, and there's no wrong right, not at all. Anyone

564
00:25:27,441 --> 00:25:29,441
Speaker 1: listening to this please know there's no judgment around anyone

565
00:25:29,521 --> 00:25:32,041
Speaker 1: sleeping around around a lot before me. And I'm sure

566
00:25:32,080 --> 00:25:34,761
Speaker 1: he had his fun glory days. But yeah, it's just

567
00:25:34,761 --> 00:25:36,360
Speaker 1: different for everyone, isn't it. Yeah.

568
00:25:36,441 --> 00:25:39,120
Speaker 2: So one lesson that I've learned from being in a

569
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:43,001
Speaker 2: relationship through just my past experiences, I've had really good

570
00:25:43,041 --> 00:25:45,120
Speaker 2: experiences in relationships and I've also had some not so

571
00:25:45,201 --> 00:25:48,321
Speaker 2: really good ones. And I think the biggest thing for

572
00:25:48,441 --> 00:25:51,640
Speaker 2: me is that the person that you choose to spend

573
00:25:51,681 --> 00:25:55,201
Speaker 2: your life with is the biggest decision that you could

574
00:25:55,241 --> 00:25:59,561
Speaker 2: ever make. And what I learned was that the person

575
00:25:59,640 --> 00:26:03,480
Speaker 2: you're spending so much time with is influencing you in

576
00:26:03,561 --> 00:26:06,281
Speaker 2: every sense of the word. The way that you think,

577
00:26:06,481 --> 00:26:08,480
Speaker 2: the way that you act, the way that you behave,

578
00:26:08,640 --> 00:26:11,120
Speaker 2: how you think about yourself, how you think about life.

579
00:26:11,201 --> 00:26:14,201
Speaker 2: So if you are unaligned with the person that you're

580
00:26:14,201 --> 00:26:17,400
Speaker 2: connecting with, maybe because you have a lot of sexual chemistry,

581
00:26:17,721 --> 00:26:21,680
Speaker 2: and you connect with that person physically, but mentally, you

582
00:26:21,681 --> 00:26:24,801
Speaker 2: guys are on a different wavelength. You've got different values,

583
00:26:25,120 --> 00:26:29,641
Speaker 2: you treat people differently. All of those things can impact

584
00:26:29,721 --> 00:26:32,521
Speaker 2: you in a negative way. I don't even want to

585
00:26:32,521 --> 00:26:36,201
Speaker 2: say it like that, but it's influence. You are one

586
00:26:36,201 --> 00:26:38,160
Speaker 2: of the five people that you spend time with. So

587
00:26:38,521 --> 00:26:41,521
Speaker 2: imagine that person you're spending time with. You're with them

588
00:26:41,640 --> 00:26:43,241
Speaker 2: at night, You're going to the gym with them, you're

589
00:26:43,281 --> 00:26:45,721
Speaker 2: eating every meal with them, You're spending so much time

590
00:26:45,761 --> 00:26:49,840
Speaker 2: with them. You can be influenced in a negative wayout.

591
00:26:49,241 --> 00:26:51,840
Speaker 1: Even realizing it, Hey, oh absolutely.

592
00:26:51,321 --> 00:26:54,360
Speaker 2: That you might end up wilting, Yes, being a version

593
00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:58,521
Speaker 2: of yourself that is condensed, smaller, more in a boxed

594
00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:01,401
Speaker 2: version of you, maybe because you're trying to be what

595
00:27:01,441 --> 00:27:02,120
Speaker 2: they want you to be.

596
00:27:02,281 --> 00:27:02,521
Speaker 1: Yes.

597
00:27:02,761 --> 00:27:05,281
Speaker 2: And then on the opposite side of that is, when

598
00:27:05,321 --> 00:27:09,760
Speaker 2: you are loved correctly, you thrive, You become a bigger

599
00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:13,521
Speaker 2: version of yourself, you become a more confident version of yourself,

600
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:16,281
Speaker 2: and so on the opposite side of that is like

601
00:27:16,321 --> 00:27:19,561
Speaker 2: when you're loved correctly, you end up learning how to

602
00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:23,561
Speaker 2: love yourself deeper because that person shows you that it's

603
00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:27,321
Speaker 2: okay to love yourself be loved to that depth. Oh absolutely,

604
00:27:27,360 --> 00:27:29,441
Speaker 2: And they might even love parts of you that you're

605
00:27:29,561 --> 00:27:32,081
Speaker 2: terrified of loving. Yeah, and then they just show you, hey,

606
00:27:32,120 --> 00:27:34,321
Speaker 2: it's okay, Like I love you all for who you are,

607
00:27:34,921 --> 00:27:38,240
Speaker 2: and you just become a grander version of yourself. And

608
00:27:38,281 --> 00:27:41,041
Speaker 2: so that's a huge lesson that I've learned in relationships

609
00:27:41,120 --> 00:27:44,321
Speaker 2: is like you're allowed to be very picky with the

610
00:27:44,321 --> 00:27:46,481
Speaker 2: person that you spend the most time with because it's

611
00:27:46,561 --> 00:27:48,360
Speaker 2: the most important decision.

612
00:27:47,961 --> 00:27:48,561
Speaker 1: You'll ever make.

613
00:27:48,921 --> 00:27:51,321
Speaker 2: And a lot of people go, oh, but you know,

614
00:27:51,561 --> 00:27:53,761
Speaker 2: choosing your career is the biggest decision you'll ever make.

615
00:27:54,281 --> 00:27:56,440
Speaker 2: But the person that you choose to do that journey

616
00:27:56,441 --> 00:27:58,920
Speaker 2: with can impact whether you get closer to that journey

617
00:27:59,041 --> 00:28:02,041
Speaker 2: or away from that journey, or closer to your personal

618
00:28:02,120 --> 00:28:06,120
Speaker 2: values or further away from your personal values. For example,

619
00:28:06,360 --> 00:28:08,721
Speaker 2: if your partner wants to have kids and you don't,

620
00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:11,721
Speaker 2: are you going to then choose that outcome for yourself

621
00:28:11,801 --> 00:28:14,640
Speaker 2: because you love that person, you think that's what you should.

622
00:28:14,360 --> 00:28:15,920
Speaker 1: Do, buy something that you really wanted.

623
00:28:16,201 --> 00:28:18,400
Speaker 2: Or maybe your partner wants you to have children and

624
00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:20,920
Speaker 2: you want to have a career, but it's really just

625
00:28:20,961 --> 00:28:23,600
Speaker 2: being like, you're allowed to take time in this decision,

626
00:28:23,921 --> 00:28:26,640
Speaker 2: You're allowed to listen to what you truly want to need.

627
00:28:27,041 --> 00:28:29,121
Speaker 2: You're allowed to be selfish, and I love that you're

628
00:28:29,160 --> 00:28:30,240
Speaker 2: allowed to be selfish in it.

629
00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:33,881
Speaker 1: Definitely another thing just on top of that too, when

630
00:28:33,880 --> 00:28:35,960
Speaker 1: you're choosing a partner as a female, and if you're

631
00:28:36,001 --> 00:28:38,601
Speaker 1: someone that wants kids, just remember you're not just choosing

632
00:28:38,641 --> 00:28:40,801
Speaker 1: them for you, You're choosing them for your kids as well.

633
00:28:41,121 --> 00:28:43,441
Speaker 1: You've got to choose, Yeah, choose wisely.

634
00:28:44,321 --> 00:28:45,481
Speaker 2: That's such a beautiful thing.

635
00:28:45,641 --> 00:28:48,881
Speaker 1: It that's the gift I took in having a shitty

636
00:28:48,881 --> 00:28:51,641
Speaker 1: father and a shitty stepfather. I was like, Wow, you

637
00:28:51,721 --> 00:28:53,961
Speaker 1: were exactly what I do not want for my children.

638
00:28:54,001 --> 00:28:56,200
Speaker 1: And I found a man that is so committed and

639
00:28:56,241 --> 00:28:59,041
Speaker 1: so hands on and so committed to his growth and

640
00:28:59,081 --> 00:29:01,401
Speaker 1: taking responsibility and being able to take care of us

641
00:29:01,841 --> 00:29:03,441
Speaker 1: the way that I never got as a little girl.

642
00:29:03,801 --> 00:29:05,841
Speaker 1: So I chose someone that could be all of that

643
00:29:05,921 --> 00:29:08,161
Speaker 1: for my kids and for me. So just keep that

644
00:29:08,201 --> 00:29:09,921
Speaker 1: in mind. It's not just about you, it's about your

645
00:29:09,921 --> 00:29:10,921
Speaker 1: future kids as well.

646
00:29:11,081 --> 00:29:13,881
Speaker 2: A lot of people, I feel sometimes have a negative

647
00:29:13,881 --> 00:29:16,720
Speaker 2: connotation around dating and being like, oh, like you shouldn't

648
00:29:16,881 --> 00:29:18,801
Speaker 2: be dating and this and that, and you should just

649
00:29:18,801 --> 00:29:21,801
Speaker 2: stick to one personally. Everybody has different viewpoints, right, But

650
00:29:22,041 --> 00:29:25,721
Speaker 2: when you learn what you want through dating, you get

651
00:29:25,721 --> 00:29:29,041
Speaker 2: to see what you want exactly, what's important to you, what's.

652
00:29:28,841 --> 00:29:30,000
Speaker 1: Not important to do that.

653
00:29:30,161 --> 00:29:32,881
Speaker 2: Yeah, And through my own experience, I was able to see, Okay,

654
00:29:32,921 --> 00:29:35,881
Speaker 2: you know, my first relationship that was four years was

655
00:29:36,281 --> 00:29:38,321
Speaker 2: very unhealthy for the both of us, and it showed

656
00:29:38,361 --> 00:29:40,200
Speaker 2: me that I never want to feel unsafe in a

657
00:29:40,241 --> 00:29:43,001
Speaker 2: relationship again. I never want someone to make me question

658
00:29:43,081 --> 00:29:45,681
Speaker 2: myself ever again. And then that allows me to see

659
00:29:45,681 --> 00:29:47,961
Speaker 2: in the next partner, okay, cool, like this person makes

660
00:29:48,001 --> 00:29:52,001
Speaker 2: me value myself more, and that's the partner that I want.

661
00:29:52,281 --> 00:29:55,081
Speaker 1: Is that the first relationship, Hey, guys, had a lot

662
00:29:55,081 --> 00:29:58,201
Speaker 1: of sexual chemistry. Yes, you value that, but you also

663
00:29:58,281 --> 00:30:00,760
Speaker 1: value safety. So you could have settled just because that

664
00:30:00,841 --> 00:30:03,000
Speaker 1: was so good, But then you would have been letting

665
00:30:03,121 --> 00:30:03,721
Speaker 1: all this go.

666
00:30:03,921 --> 00:30:06,200
Speaker 2: Well. It was this sexual chemistry that we had in

667
00:30:06,241 --> 00:30:09,401
Speaker 2: the relationship was like savoring the relationship. It was the

668
00:30:09,441 --> 00:30:13,041
Speaker 2: thing that beyond all the fighting and the gas lighting

669
00:30:13,121 --> 00:30:15,281
Speaker 2: and just for her, all the hurt and all the

670
00:30:15,321 --> 00:30:17,681
Speaker 2: negative side of things, it was the sex that would

671
00:30:17,681 --> 00:30:19,841
Speaker 2: bring us together, and so it was like a band

672
00:30:19,881 --> 00:30:23,200
Speaker 2: aid solution almost, but it was so strong that we

673
00:30:23,201 --> 00:30:24,001
Speaker 2: we just couldn't let.

674
00:30:23,921 --> 00:30:25,441
Speaker 1: Each other go. Yeah, it was almost addictive.

675
00:30:25,561 --> 00:30:27,121
Speaker 2: It was honestly very on healthy.

676
00:30:27,121 --> 00:30:29,681
Speaker 1: It was very addictive. It was so good, yeah, you know.

677
00:30:29,841 --> 00:30:32,401
Speaker 2: But it wasn't in every other area. That was the

678
00:30:32,481 --> 00:30:34,281
Speaker 2: only area that was actually good. When I look at

679
00:30:34,321 --> 00:30:35,561
Speaker 2: it in hindsight.

680
00:30:35,521 --> 00:30:37,081
Speaker 1: I wrote down this note. I'm going to read it

681
00:30:37,081 --> 00:30:39,041
Speaker 1: out straight from here. It's really nice to be able

682
00:30:39,081 --> 00:30:41,481
Speaker 1: to be so selfish with your time to do exactly

683
00:30:41,481 --> 00:30:43,481
Speaker 1: what you want when you want, and really focus on

684
00:30:43,521 --> 00:30:45,761
Speaker 1: your own emotional piece. To take the time to get

685
00:30:45,761 --> 00:30:47,240
Speaker 1: to know yourself and what you want out of your

686
00:30:47,241 --> 00:30:51,041
Speaker 1: life without outside noise from anyone, including your partner. You know,

687
00:30:51,161 --> 00:30:53,801
Speaker 1: kind of goes against what you just said. But I

688
00:30:53,841 --> 00:30:58,720
Speaker 1: think from experience and even viewing friends in partnerships that

689
00:30:58,761 --> 00:31:01,401
Speaker 1: aren't necessarily I suppose healthy, they get lost in the

690
00:31:01,441 --> 00:31:05,161
Speaker 1: relationship and they lose themselves and what they enjoy and

691
00:31:05,201 --> 00:31:07,520
Speaker 1: their hobbies and what their passions and their purpose are

692
00:31:07,521 --> 00:31:09,601
Speaker 1: because they think they just alwayst need to be at

693
00:31:09,641 --> 00:31:12,200
Speaker 1: service of their partner. We were talking about this the

694
00:31:12,201 --> 00:31:15,601
Speaker 1: other day with someone that we know, and yes, I'm

695
00:31:15,601 --> 00:31:18,721
Speaker 1: so committed to Steve and my children, but I also

696
00:31:18,801 --> 00:31:21,161
Speaker 1: know I'm the best version of myself when I'm taking

697
00:31:21,201 --> 00:31:24,521
Speaker 1: care of me and I'm still honoring all the things

698
00:31:24,561 --> 00:31:27,201
Speaker 1: that I value in my life. And it was really

699
00:31:27,241 --> 00:31:29,641
Speaker 1: important to find a partner. And we've had our echy

700
00:31:29,681 --> 00:31:31,961
Speaker 1: moments where we've had to have hard discussions around this

701
00:31:32,121 --> 00:31:35,361
Speaker 1: when maybe it's slipped or we're not allowing each other

702
00:31:35,401 --> 00:31:37,321
Speaker 1: to do everything we want to do, or we've had

703
00:31:37,401 --> 00:31:41,961
Speaker 1: moments of jealousy or resentment come up, but we're solid

704
00:31:42,001 --> 00:31:44,081
Speaker 1: with it now. Is really allowing each other to do

705
00:31:44,121 --> 00:31:45,521
Speaker 1: the things we want to do, with who we want

706
00:31:45,561 --> 00:31:47,041
Speaker 1: to do, when we want to do it. Yes, it

707
00:31:47,081 --> 00:31:49,480
Speaker 1: still needs to work and revolve around the family, but

708
00:31:49,521 --> 00:31:53,001
Speaker 1: I don't ever feel any resentment from Steve or towards Steve,

709
00:31:53,161 --> 00:31:55,520
Speaker 1: because we both make sure each other gets to do that.

710
00:31:55,561 --> 00:31:57,401
Speaker 1: For example, this week, he's gone to this strain and open.

711
00:31:57,641 --> 00:32:00,321
Speaker 1: Anytime I go away or Steve goes away, there's always

712
00:32:00,481 --> 00:32:03,321
Speaker 1: an influx of DMS women being like, how do you

713
00:32:03,401 --> 00:32:05,081
Speaker 1: let your partner go away when you're at home with

714
00:32:05,161 --> 00:32:07,561
Speaker 1: your kids by yourself, And for me, I was like,

715
00:32:07,601 --> 00:32:10,440
Speaker 1: why would I not. He works so hard for us

716
00:32:10,521 --> 00:32:12,281
Speaker 1: on his most amazing dad, I want him to go

717
00:32:12,321 --> 00:32:14,440
Speaker 1: and have fun. I almost want him to switch his

718
00:32:14,481 --> 00:32:17,441
Speaker 1: phone off if I'm being honest, and not have to

719
00:32:17,681 --> 00:32:19,881
Speaker 1: report back to staff and be running the business and

720
00:32:20,241 --> 00:32:22,280
Speaker 1: always just being on. I want him to switch off

721
00:32:22,321 --> 00:32:23,081
Speaker 1: and just be Steve.

722
00:32:23,281 --> 00:32:23,841
Speaker 2: Yeah.

723
00:32:23,881 --> 00:32:25,841
Speaker 1: And I want him to want that for me. Yeah,

724
00:32:25,881 --> 00:32:27,561
Speaker 1: he knows. When I go on my girl to BALI,

725
00:32:27,681 --> 00:32:29,881
Speaker 1: I'm taking off my mum hat. Yeah, taken off my

726
00:32:29,921 --> 00:32:31,721
Speaker 1: work hat. I'm taken off all my hats, and I'm

727
00:32:31,761 --> 00:32:34,281
Speaker 1: just free to just be who I want to be

728
00:32:34,321 --> 00:32:36,761
Speaker 1: in that moment, as she again. Yeah, and I love

729
00:32:36,801 --> 00:32:38,601
Speaker 1: the mum hat. I love the wife hat, and I

730
00:32:38,601 --> 00:32:40,561
Speaker 1: love the podcasting. I love all the hats I wear.

731
00:32:40,761 --> 00:32:42,521
Speaker 1: I really do. I wouldn't do them if I didn't.

732
00:32:43,121 --> 00:32:45,801
Speaker 1: But it's really important to not lose yourself in a relationship.

733
00:32:45,841 --> 00:32:48,081
Speaker 1: And I learned that from being with someone for so long,

734
00:32:48,081 --> 00:32:49,681
Speaker 1: because there has been moments where I feel like I

735
00:32:49,681 --> 00:32:52,681
Speaker 1: have revolved my life around Steve or tried to please

736
00:32:52,761 --> 00:32:54,161
Speaker 1: him and do everything he wants to be, and then

737
00:32:54,201 --> 00:32:55,881
Speaker 1: I feel this resentment of like, oh, well, why did

738
00:32:55,921 --> 00:32:58,121
Speaker 1: I get to do that? And he would say, well

739
00:32:58,161 --> 00:33:01,041
Speaker 1: you can. What's stopping you? Yeah, And it's my own

740
00:33:01,281 --> 00:33:03,841
Speaker 1: stuff in my own head going on. So that's just

741
00:33:03,881 --> 00:33:05,681
Speaker 1: an important lesson I wanted to out there because I

742
00:33:05,681 --> 00:33:08,841
Speaker 1: think it's easy to do, especially in a long term relationship,

743
00:33:09,121 --> 00:33:12,441
Speaker 1: and if you're not having the hard conversations and honoring

744
00:33:12,521 --> 00:33:14,440
Speaker 1: truly what you want to what you need. Yeah, and

745
00:33:14,481 --> 00:33:17,641
Speaker 1: it's not that it's ever tip for tat, However, I

746
00:33:17,681 --> 00:33:20,481
Speaker 1: don't ever want to risk there being any resentment. Yeah,

747
00:33:20,481 --> 00:33:21,960
Speaker 1: when I go on a girlship and like where are

748
00:33:21,961 --> 00:33:23,521
Speaker 1: you going to go with the boys? What are you

749
00:33:23,521 --> 00:33:25,240
Speaker 1: going to do? Yeah? You know, I really want us

750
00:33:25,321 --> 00:33:28,001
Speaker 1: both to have all the things that we enjoy in love. Yeah,

751
00:33:28,041 --> 00:33:29,641
Speaker 1: but yeah, what's your second one?

752
00:33:30,081 --> 00:33:33,121
Speaker 2: My next lesson that I've learned in a relationship is

753
00:33:33,161 --> 00:33:37,561
Speaker 2: that I truly believe that you can learn and grow

754
00:33:37,961 --> 00:33:41,921
Speaker 2: so much faster when you're in a relationship versus being single. Now,

755
00:33:42,001 --> 00:33:44,281
Speaker 2: don't get me wrong, I think you can do an

756
00:33:44,281 --> 00:33:49,201
Speaker 2: immense amount of personal development, self inquiry work and understand

757
00:33:49,201 --> 00:33:51,401
Speaker 2: who you are as a person when you're single. There's

758
00:33:51,401 --> 00:33:53,921
Speaker 2: a time and a place for that, but there's something

759
00:33:54,121 --> 00:33:57,161
Speaker 2: about being in an intimate relationship where you are devoted

760
00:33:57,161 --> 00:34:01,401
Speaker 2: to each other, like all ego down, like fully committed

761
00:34:01,401 --> 00:34:04,401
Speaker 2: to this person devotion. You're a team, you're a union.

762
00:34:05,121 --> 00:34:08,000
Speaker 2: There is something so special about being able to do

763
00:34:08,041 --> 00:34:10,841
Speaker 2: that with somebody that all of your shit comes out.

764
00:34:11,361 --> 00:34:14,641
Speaker 2: And I just think when you're single, you're not triggered

765
00:34:14,721 --> 00:34:16,401
Speaker 2: or exposed to the same things that you are in

766
00:34:16,401 --> 00:34:19,921
Speaker 2: a relationship. So true, you're just not because you're free,

767
00:34:20,081 --> 00:34:22,641
Speaker 2: you're in control, you're not vulnerable.

768
00:34:23,441 --> 00:34:24,681
Speaker 1: Just think about anyone else.

769
00:34:24,521 --> 00:34:27,081
Speaker 2: Having a good time. Everything revolves around. You're a little

770
00:34:27,081 --> 00:34:29,761
Speaker 2: bit more selfish, whereas when you're in a relationship, you

771
00:34:29,841 --> 00:34:33,361
Speaker 2: are taking into consideration somebody else. You're surrounded by somebody

772
00:34:33,441 --> 00:34:35,521
Speaker 2: all the time, your fears come up.

773
00:34:35,681 --> 00:34:36,721
Speaker 1: You're vulnerable.

774
00:34:37,201 --> 00:34:39,361
Speaker 2: You love that person so much that sometimes you even

775
00:34:39,361 --> 00:34:41,121
Speaker 2: get a little bit nervous, like, oh can I lose

776
00:34:41,161 --> 00:34:44,281
Speaker 2: this person? You're a lot more vulnerable, right, and so

777
00:34:44,441 --> 00:34:47,161
Speaker 2: you are exposed to a whole set of challenges that

778
00:34:47,201 --> 00:34:50,201
Speaker 2: you wouldn't whin you're singles. And I just think it's

779
00:34:50,241 --> 00:34:54,441
Speaker 2: an incredible thing to experience because you can heal so

780
00:34:54,641 --> 00:34:59,001
Speaker 2: many wounds that you're carrying, whether it's jealousy, fear of loss,

781
00:34:59,121 --> 00:35:02,961
Speaker 2: fear of abandonment, anything that you're so terrified or losing

782
00:35:03,721 --> 00:35:04,721
Speaker 2: all of that shit's.

783
00:35:04,441 --> 00:35:04,881
Speaker 1: Going to come up.

784
00:35:05,081 --> 00:35:05,721
Speaker 2: You got to face it.

785
00:35:05,801 --> 00:35:07,601
Speaker 1: Yeah, you have to face You got to face it

786
00:35:07,961 --> 00:35:08,241
Speaker 1: from it.

787
00:35:08,401 --> 00:35:09,881
Speaker 2: Either face it or you push the person away.

788
00:35:09,961 --> 00:35:10,681
Speaker 1: Yes, exactly.

789
00:35:10,761 --> 00:35:13,921
Speaker 2: So in that moment, you get an opportunity to really grow.

790
00:35:14,561 --> 00:35:16,761
Speaker 2: And I'm learning this in my current relationship with Lee

791
00:35:16,881 --> 00:35:19,121
Speaker 2: now that there have been things that have come up

792
00:35:19,121 --> 00:35:21,241
Speaker 2: for me around you know, fear of losing him or

793
00:35:21,281 --> 00:35:24,401
Speaker 2: fear of getting too vulnerable, and the intimacy that we're

794
00:35:24,641 --> 00:35:27,921
Speaker 2: creating is the most beautiful thing that I've ever experienced

795
00:35:27,921 --> 00:35:31,081
Speaker 2: in my life. And I've had fears come up around it.

796
00:35:31,361 --> 00:35:33,480
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, oh, this is too deep, it's too.

797
00:35:33,441 --> 00:35:36,601
Speaker 2: Scary, you know. And then for me, it's about sitting

798
00:35:36,601 --> 00:35:39,601
Speaker 2: with those fears, being like, you're safe, You're okay, he's

799
00:35:39,641 --> 00:35:41,801
Speaker 2: got you, you can trust him, you can trust yourself,

800
00:35:42,241 --> 00:35:44,361
Speaker 2: and then leaning in and then it deepens even more,

801
00:35:44,881 --> 00:35:47,241
Speaker 2: and then that fear just dissolves, and then you know,

802
00:35:47,281 --> 00:35:49,281
Speaker 2: you're like, okay, cool, I can park this for now

803
00:35:49,361 --> 00:35:51,601
Speaker 2: until it comes up the next time, and then I'll

804
00:35:51,601 --> 00:35:52,961
Speaker 2: be able to face it again and I'll do the

805
00:35:52,961 --> 00:35:53,521
Speaker 2: same thing again.

806
00:35:54,001 --> 00:35:56,480
Speaker 1: You recover quick at each time. It comes up every time,

807
00:35:56,641 --> 00:35:58,601
Speaker 1: and then it might be a micro triuger to be like, oh,

808
00:35:58,761 --> 00:36:01,681
Speaker 1: I remember that didn't used to feel good. Actually I'm okay.

809
00:36:02,521 --> 00:36:04,321
Speaker 2: Even now it's like cop once down the track and

810
00:36:04,321 --> 00:36:06,281
Speaker 2: I don't feel that same way and I did in

811
00:36:06,321 --> 00:36:06,801
Speaker 2: the beginning.

812
00:36:06,881 --> 00:36:08,561
Speaker 1: You will want to bring it up so that you

813
00:36:08,561 --> 00:36:09,561
Speaker 1: guys can work through it together.

814
00:36:09,601 --> 00:36:11,561
Speaker 2: I'm like, let's go bring it in, and bring it in.

815
00:36:12,001 --> 00:36:13,161
Speaker 2: Let's go, let's get to work.

816
00:36:13,401 --> 00:36:13,961
Speaker 1: So cool.

817
00:36:14,241 --> 00:36:16,121
Speaker 2: Do you have one more lesson that you want to share?

818
00:36:16,161 --> 00:36:18,561
Speaker 1: I have one more that will actually surprise you. And

819
00:36:18,601 --> 00:36:20,641
Speaker 1: it's been really cool to have conversations with you about

820
00:36:20,641 --> 00:36:22,401
Speaker 1: this because I think it's a common fear for a

821
00:36:22,441 --> 00:36:25,881
Speaker 1: lot of people. But I'm here to debunk that myth.

822
00:36:26,361 --> 00:36:29,561
Speaker 1: The sex actually gets better and better the longer you're

823
00:36:29,601 --> 00:36:33,281
Speaker 1: with someone. I used to fear being with someone long term.

824
00:36:33,601 --> 00:36:35,401
Speaker 1: Would I get sick of having the same penis for

825
00:36:35,441 --> 00:36:37,841
Speaker 1: over ten years? Am I going to get bored of that?

826
00:36:37,921 --> 00:36:39,801
Speaker 1: Is he going to get bored of me? Does he

827
00:36:39,881 --> 00:36:41,761
Speaker 1: see me in lingerie or naked and be like, oh,

828
00:36:41,801 --> 00:36:44,961
Speaker 1: I've seen that so many times? Nope, just as excited,

829
00:36:45,801 --> 00:36:48,641
Speaker 1: just as good. I still get if not better reactions now,

830
00:36:48,761 --> 00:36:51,841
Speaker 1: But I tell you what, it gets better and better

831
00:36:51,921 --> 00:36:54,601
Speaker 1: still to this day, nearly seventeen years later, I feel

832
00:36:54,641 --> 00:36:56,641
Speaker 1: like our sex life is better than it ever has been.

833
00:36:57,441 --> 00:37:00,321
Speaker 1: You're so much more connected. They know your body inside out.

834
00:37:00,361 --> 00:37:03,001
Speaker 1: He knows everything about my body. He knows what I love,

835
00:37:03,041 --> 00:37:06,561
Speaker 1: literally everything. I think that's so cool. I really love

836
00:37:06,601 --> 00:37:08,480
Speaker 1: that because I used to be a really big fear

837
00:37:08,521 --> 00:37:11,921
Speaker 1: of mine. And of course we've been through more dry spots.

838
00:37:12,201 --> 00:37:14,361
Speaker 1: You know, after having a baby, I definitely wasn't feeling

839
00:37:14,401 --> 00:37:17,121
Speaker 1: like my most sexual self. But I love that it

840
00:37:17,161 --> 00:37:19,201
Speaker 1: gets to get better and better and it's still just

841
00:37:19,241 --> 00:37:21,761
Speaker 1: as exciting, It's still as just as pleasurable. I think

842
00:37:21,761 --> 00:37:24,241
Speaker 1: it's really cool. After all this time gives me hope

843
00:37:24,241 --> 00:37:27,081
Speaker 1: that in forty years I'll still be saying, yes, let's hope.

844
00:37:27,121 --> 00:37:29,921
Speaker 1: So report back there. Yeah, it's a report back that.

845
00:37:29,921 --> 00:37:33,041
Speaker 2: Makes me so excited and makes me excited to look

846
00:37:33,081 --> 00:37:35,601
Speaker 2: forward to being able to create that with somebody and

847
00:37:35,721 --> 00:37:37,601
Speaker 2: like be able to create that life as well, and

848
00:37:38,041 --> 00:37:40,281
Speaker 2: that I have hope of I get to be in

849
00:37:40,321 --> 00:37:43,841
Speaker 2: control of how the relationship evolves, because that's the effort

850
00:37:43,881 --> 00:37:46,561
Speaker 2: that you and Steve put in time and time again

851
00:37:46,721 --> 00:37:48,801
Speaker 2: to be able to reconnect with each other. Make sure

852
00:37:48,881 --> 00:37:51,321
Speaker 2: that you keep that like spark and that passion alive,

853
00:37:51,961 --> 00:37:54,041
Speaker 2: and that's like a true testament to your relationship. That's

854
00:37:54,041 --> 00:37:55,481
Speaker 2: so it's super impressive.

855
00:37:55,081 --> 00:37:57,241
Speaker 1: Because it's not just in the bedroom. It's actually everything

856
00:37:57,241 --> 00:38:00,241
Speaker 1: outside the bedroom, especially for females. Outside the bedroom is

857
00:38:00,241 --> 00:38:02,641
Speaker 1: our foreplay. Oh yeah, how we're connected, how we're heard,

858
00:38:02,641 --> 00:38:05,601
Speaker 1: how we feel safe, how validated we feel. All of

859
00:38:05,641 --> 00:38:08,601
Speaker 1: that that takes consistent work and being so conscious and

860
00:38:08,601 --> 00:38:11,161
Speaker 1: aware of each other and what you're needing day to day.

861
00:38:11,801 --> 00:38:14,161
Speaker 1: I think without all of that, the sex wouldn't be

862
00:38:14,201 --> 00:38:16,401
Speaker 1: as good. Yeah. So yeah, that's my last one. What

863
00:38:16,441 --> 00:38:18,361
Speaker 1: about you watch your last good one? Thank you?

864
00:38:19,001 --> 00:38:22,881
Speaker 2: Okay, So my last one is a lesson that I

865
00:38:22,961 --> 00:38:27,441
Speaker 2: learned from being single, and any validation is not good validation.

866
00:38:28,361 --> 00:38:28,681
Speaker 1: Yeah.

867
00:38:28,881 --> 00:38:31,161
Speaker 2: I think what I've learned while being single is that

868
00:38:31,721 --> 00:38:34,521
Speaker 2: it's all fun in games for about five minutes when

869
00:38:34,521 --> 00:38:38,601
Speaker 2: you're receiving validation, when you're receiving like Instagram like or

870
00:38:38,601 --> 00:38:40,881
Speaker 2: a quick DM or just men being interested in you.

871
00:38:40,961 --> 00:38:43,641
Speaker 2: Yeah you know, men you know, wanting to send a

872
00:38:43,681 --> 00:38:44,761
Speaker 2: fire emoji.

873
00:38:44,401 --> 00:38:46,201
Speaker 1: On your Instagram at a cafe or something.

874
00:38:46,281 --> 00:38:47,921
Speaker 2: Yeah, I want to start something up with you, but

875
00:38:47,961 --> 00:38:51,601
Speaker 2: it's just there's no substance to that validation that it

876
00:38:51,601 --> 00:38:54,721
Speaker 2: can sometimes be more detrimental than anything. If you're single

877
00:38:54,761 --> 00:38:57,481
Speaker 2: and you're looking for that higher validation just from anyone,

878
00:38:58,081 --> 00:39:00,161
Speaker 2: because you're just you're bored and you're kind of looking

879
00:39:00,241 --> 00:39:02,681
Speaker 2: for that, it can be more detrimental because you're going

880
00:39:02,721 --> 00:39:05,001
Speaker 2: to then chase that. You're not giving that to your

881
00:39:05,361 --> 00:39:08,201
Speaker 2: You're not able to be that sense of validation and

882
00:39:08,241 --> 00:39:11,361
Speaker 2: reassurance for yourself. You're always seeking the next shiny object,

883
00:39:11,361 --> 00:39:13,921
Speaker 2: which is usually a man or depending what you're into.

884
00:39:14,321 --> 00:39:16,801
Speaker 2: So I just learned that it's not that fun. It's

885
00:39:16,801 --> 00:39:18,761
Speaker 2: not that fun, And I resonate a lot with what

886
00:39:18,801 --> 00:39:21,921
Speaker 2: you said in the beginning around wanting to build a

887
00:39:21,961 --> 00:39:25,361
Speaker 2: life with somebody. For me, the word devotion is what

888
00:39:26,361 --> 00:39:29,521
Speaker 2: represents relationships for me, and I've always wanted that. So

889
00:39:29,961 --> 00:39:32,801
Speaker 2: the in between of relationships for being single, I'm like, yes,

890
00:39:32,841 --> 00:39:34,881
Speaker 2: I love time with myself. I use it as a

891
00:39:34,961 --> 00:39:37,321
Speaker 2: character building moment off I get to learn and love

892
00:39:37,401 --> 00:39:41,521
Speaker 2: myself deeper. However, being able to create that with somebody

893
00:39:41,521 --> 00:39:44,361
Speaker 2: and being devoted to somebody who's like the ultimate.

894
00:39:44,081 --> 00:39:46,761
Speaker 1: End goal for me. We love you, guys, We love you.

895
00:39:46,841 --> 00:39:49,041
Speaker 1: If you're not in our Facebook community, please come over

896
00:39:49,321 --> 00:39:52,681
Speaker 1: jump in there. Just search she rises on Facebook us

897
00:39:52,721 --> 00:39:55,001
Speaker 1: to join you. Are you in? It's all female based

898
00:39:55,001 --> 00:39:57,721
Speaker 1: forum where we get to support each other, continue yapping

899
00:39:57,761 --> 00:39:59,960
Speaker 1: about the episodes. You can ask us any questions, throw

900
00:39:59,961 --> 00:40:02,961
Speaker 1: on some suggestions. You will always be the first ones

901
00:40:02,961 --> 00:40:05,441
Speaker 1: to get access to tickets to our events, which is

902
00:40:05,601 --> 00:40:08,401
Speaker 1: around seventy percent of our last tickets sold from girls

903
00:40:08,401 --> 00:40:10,081
Speaker 1: in the forum. Yes, so we give them a four

904
00:40:10,121 --> 00:40:12,161
Speaker 1: twenty four hours before we release the public. So that

905
00:40:12,161 --> 00:40:13,841
Speaker 1: event we spoke about sounds like a bit of you

906
00:40:14,201 --> 00:40:16,361
Speaker 1: and you wanted to step outside your comfort zone and grow,

907
00:40:16,921 --> 00:40:18,121
Speaker 1: Then make sure you're in the forum.

908
00:40:18,361 --> 00:40:19,361
Speaker 2: It's coming in really hot.

909
00:40:19,441 --> 00:40:19,601
Speaker 1: Yeah.

910
00:40:19,601 --> 00:40:21,201
Speaker 2: I think it's going to be going on sale very

911
00:40:21,281 --> 00:40:22,081
Speaker 2: soon for the next one.

912
00:40:22,281 --> 00:40:24,441
Speaker 1: Yeah. Otherwise we'll be in your ears on Wednesday. Sounds

913
00:40:24,481 --> 00:40:25,761
Speaker 1: good bye, bye, ladies,