Speaker 1: Is the crissiest one show.
Speaker 2: I mean, look, I feel like the sun is shining everywhere.
Speaker 3: This is a good day most places, I believe. So Swanny.
Speaker 2: I've got a barn me in my tummy which has
Speaker 2: been lurking in the back of my must do list
Speaker 2: for a long time. Right one, and I've got some
Speaker 2: great news. It feels like Lint have got new flavor balls.
Speaker 3: Well, I love a new flavored.
Speaker 2: Ball, me too. This think it's called dop be your
Speaker 2: choculator double chocolate.
Speaker 3: Wow.
Speaker 2: So it's like the red one, but like on steroids.
Speaker 2: You can hear I'm salivating.
Speaker 3: Richer if I'd like a richer ball.
Speaker 2: Well, I was talking to VICKI, receptionist. Yeah, and I
Speaker 2: said this is new and she goes And then I said,
Speaker 2: have you had the strawberry ones? She didn't know about
Speaker 2: the strawberry ones?
Speaker 3: What are the strawberry ones?
Speaker 2: They are magic cola. Hey, I need one. I'm gonna
Speaker 2: have to go on.
Speaker 4: You know how you don't like orange in your chocolate
Speaker 4: and those two meshing. I don't like strawberry chocolate mashing.
Speaker 2: It's white chocolate though even.
Speaker 3: Worse, really don't like white chocolate.
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, then I guess we're gonna have to break
Speaker 2: up over it.
Speaker 3: I want to try the pink ball.
Speaker 2: Are they're more vigue the last one?
Speaker 3: Damn it?
Speaker 4: Hey, after three o'clock we have tickets to see Kylie
Speaker 4: Minogue Inside the bum Bag? What Increas's queasy? Her new
Speaker 4: tune is an absolute vibe two lights camera Actually next though,
Speaker 4: miss it Creasy thirteen twenty four to ten. If you
Speaker 4: would like your mind red, you'll get a VIP Specsavers
Speaker 4: voucher in two hundred and fifty dollars cash the.
Speaker 1: Creasy Swan Show. Let's do this.
Speaker 5: Specsavers is helping Chrissy we her mystical visions should have
Speaker 5: gone to Specsavers.
Speaker 2: I have a spec Saver's update.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah for me.
Speaker 2: Yesterday I said on to do list Tuesday, drop my
Speaker 2: specs in my brand new blue slash green speck that
Speaker 2: I stood on. Got a text message ready to be
Speaker 2: picked up.
Speaker 3: Mate.
Speaker 4: They would have just chucked them in the bin and
Speaker 4: got your brand new pairchrisy Swan.
Speaker 2: Can't turn it around that quick, mate, They're the same glasses.
Speaker 2: Those people are mystic themselves.
Speaker 3: Because you've got your special lenses and stuff.
Speaker 2: Correct.
Speaker 3: Wow, I love this. Who is in your office today?
Speaker 2: Hello Amanda, pull the curtain back and take a seat
Speaker 2: in my cane chair.
Speaker 6: Hello Chrissy, Hello Jack.
Speaker 2: Hello Amanda, Amanda, Jane.
Speaker 3: Clarus go again?
Speaker 7: My sisters. My sister's ne he named Jane.
Speaker 2: Amanda.
Speaker 7: Louise Clarus starts with an ow, you're on the right track, Lee.
Speaker 2: Yes, oh Amanda. Why am I seeing the word grumpy?
Speaker 7: Because I just got back from Bali and you.
Speaker 2: Wish you were their slummered Peggy Amanda slummer party.
Speaker 3: That's it. What did she drink in Bali?
Speaker 8: Ah?
Speaker 2: She drank? You drank a lot of mahidos though specifically.
Speaker 3: Yes I did.
Speaker 2: Yeah, lots of good thing about them is you pay
Speaker 2: a fortune. There's no booze in them. Okay, Now I
Speaker 2: can see a big box of biicarb soder. You're mad
Speaker 2: for buy carp soda or someone is, maybe your mum.
Speaker 2: You use it to clean everything everything. All roads lead
Speaker 2: to buy carp. Oh, I've got some rust on my fridge.
Speaker 2: You know what it'll get that Amanda by carp.
Speaker 3: Maybe it's another white powder.
Speaker 2: Please don't do that in Bali you'll end up in car.
Speaker 7: It's not me, but maybe maybe my mom, she's a clean, free.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you grew up near a house that should have
Speaker 2: been condemned, or maybe it was your house. I grew
Speaker 2: up near house ye falling down, spooky Boo Radley Star.
Speaker 8: Very spooky and all the kids used to play in it.
Speaker 3: In your house?
Speaker 2: No, in a spooky house.
Speaker 3: Oh that's epic.
Speaker 2: Good for spinn the bottle though, Hey, Amanda, Yep, there's
Speaker 2: a redundancy around you, whether or not you want one
Speaker 2: desperately because you hate your job, or somebody's just got one.
Speaker 7: I want one.
Speaker 3: What field of work do we think a Manda works in,
Speaker 3: Mister Chrissy.
Speaker 2: It's clerical officey correct, God, I can hear you hate it.
Speaker 2: You have an aversion to pigeons. Don't like pigeons or birds,
Speaker 2: the wings spooking.
Speaker 8: My sister hates birds with a passion, and we always
Speaker 8: find it funny when we throw like chips at the
Speaker 8: seagulls and they come.
Speaker 1: Near her and she goes.
Speaker 7: Yeah, she runs away screaming.
Speaker 2: She doesn't like pigeons, she doesn't know, but she does
Speaker 2: like the sound of music, and so do you, Amanda.
Speaker 3: The film I love musicals.
Speaker 2: No, the sound of music specifically Maria von Trapp.
Speaker 3: The session's over, Mystic's.
Speaker 2: That's West Side story, wicked.
Speaker 3: Give up?
Speaker 4: You have one a VIP Specsavers voucher for one pair
Speaker 4: of glasses and two hundred and fifty dollars cash.
Speaker 2: Don't stomp on them. I won't them.
Speaker 3: Also, Amanda, I hope you quit your job soon.
Speaker 2: I hope so too. Christy Swan Show, If you need
Speaker 2: a doctor, you'oin over one million Australians who are skipping
Speaker 2: the waiting room and speak to Instant scripts doctors online
Speaker 2: from the comfort of time.
Speaker 5: To find out more, visit instantscripts dot com dot Are you.
Speaker 2: Chrissy Swan Show, I have found my exact polar opposite
Speaker 2: human being. You know how, there's that thing where, if
Speaker 2: you're very, very lucky, you come across your doppelganger.
Speaker 3: M mmm.
Speaker 2: Have you done a deep dive on that on Google?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: You must have, you tom.
Speaker 3: On like who your doppelganger is?
Speaker 2: People have met their doppelgangers and had photos with them,
Speaker 2: but how do you? And there's a full gallery of like,
Speaker 2: oh my god, I was just catching the Brooklyn train
Speaker 2: and I sat next to this.
Speaker 4: Guy and he was, yeah, yeah, I feel like it
Speaker 4: would happen in cities like New York and London and
Speaker 4: stuff where there are so many people.
Speaker 3: But here, yeah, it doesn't. You never hear of that.
Speaker 2: Apparently it blows your mind when you see somebody that looks.
Speaker 3: Like you, extraordinary kind of with you.
Speaker 2: Well, this guy in Texas is the exact opposite for me.
Speaker 2: And it's not just for reasons that are going to
Speaker 2: become immediately apparent. A man in White's a hatchie in
Speaker 2: Texas has bid on a Taylor Swift acoustic guitar. It's
Speaker 2: as cute as anything. Remember she went through that phase
Speaker 2: of like collage, you know, where she'd cut out little
Speaker 2: decopage bits and bobs. And he's paid four grand at
Speaker 2: a at a public auction for this guitar. And when
Speaker 2: I heard that, I thought that's good going. I would
Speaker 2: love that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and you would like buy, you'd spend a ridiculous
Speaker 4: amount on something like that, like five grade for Taylor
Speaker 4: Swift's guitar is fine, Like, that's pretty good.
Speaker 2: Imagine how that would look on my folklore cabin sauna.
Speaker 3: Oh don't how's that saunagain?
Speaker 2: I haven't done anything, done anything to it. I've just
Speaker 2: collected it in a basket. Anyway, he's bought it, and
Speaker 2: then the hammer's come down sold, and then he's walked
Speaker 2: up with his own hammer right and smashed it to
Speaker 2: bits in front of everybody because he likes Donald Trump
Speaker 2: more than he likes Taylor Swift at Okay, So there's
Speaker 2: a few things about this. If I was related to
Speaker 2: that person, I would never speak to them again again.
Speaker 2: I would say it openly. Also, I would say you're
Speaker 2: an embarrassment.
Speaker 4: I think you're right to do that because no matter
Speaker 4: who you politically align with or who you don't like,
Speaker 4: you don't make it known publicly. And also I imagine
Speaker 4: it was a charity like auction or they were raising
Speaker 4: funds for something. Yeah, yes, that's pretty like disrespectful to
Speaker 4: the organization, like have some class your bogan.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a nonprofit organization supporting agricultural education for local youth.
Speaker 2: I mean, this guy is just an idiot, a you're
Speaker 2: her own man. Don't spend four thousand dollars on a
Speaker 2: guitar that you're going to destroy? What are you?
Speaker 3: A rich redneck is what he is.
Speaker 2: But just pathetic, do you know what I mean?
Speaker 3: Pathetic?
Speaker 2: Also, it's all very well to be a Donald Trump
Speaker 2: supporter or voter. I don't care. I don't understand it,
Speaker 2: but I don't care who you vote for. The bottom
Speaker 2: line is, though Taylor's done nothing wrong, she hasn't said
Speaker 2: or done anything mean or unsupportive about Donald Trump. She's
Speaker 2: also allowed.
Speaker 3: To endorse whoever she wants.
Speaker 2: Yours Kamala Harris, and Donald Trump was the one that
Speaker 2: made fake images of somebody, Taylor Swift endorsing him, So
Speaker 2: he's done the wrong thing. And then this dickhead has
Speaker 2: gone me and my guy and spent four thousand dollars.
Speaker 2: I mean, what a.
Speaker 3: Moron, actual idiot. I'm with you. I mean, but I
Speaker 3: love how angry it's.
Speaker 2: Oh, It's made me so mad. It's this man is
Speaker 2: an idiot.
Speaker 4: He looks like you've just showed me the video photo.
Speaker 4: He looks like Hulk Hogan like, he looks like.
Speaker 2: He's five minutes away from a hypertension attack. Put the
Speaker 2: red meat.
Speaker 4: Down, Tom, Let's find him on Twitter, call him and
Speaker 4: get him on next for the neutrable at Flip It
Speaker 4: or Mix It competition Mia Hammer and we'll make both songs.
Speaker 4: Taylor Swift, but no seriously, if you'd like to play
Speaker 4: this game, register by the Nova Player up because you
Speaker 4: could win a thousand bucks worth of neutrable at Products
Speaker 4: the Chrissy.
Speaker 2: Swan Shows The Chrissy Swan Show. Let's give away some
Speaker 2: neutral as.
Speaker 3: It's the number one crystal blend of brand in the world.
Speaker 1: Chrisy's flipped and mix it. Let's go.
Speaker 2: I'm a dang to help a bit of a process.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, Alana.
Speaker 1: Hello, Hi? Hell are you now?
Speaker 2: You are referring to your husband's very health giving smoothie
Speaker 2: shakes a stinky protein shakes.
Speaker 9: Why?
Speaker 1: Yeah, you just can't get the smell out of it.
Speaker 1: It's gross.
Speaker 7: I won't touch it anymore.
Speaker 2: The smell of what what is he putting in there?
Speaker 7: It's just the smell of the protein.
Speaker 1: I don't know what it is.
Speaker 8: I feel like it just leaches into the I know what.
Speaker 2: You mean telling to start using pea protein. That's what
Speaker 2: I use in my neutrable and it's delicious.
Speaker 3: Is your husband like, really, Jack, Dolana? God, No, the
Speaker 3: poor guy, he's listening.
Speaker 2: God all right, Let's see if we can get you
Speaker 2: your very own neutra bullet flip and it never needs
Speaker 2: to be sullied with the stinky husband protein powder.
Speaker 7: Okay, all right, thank you, all right.
Speaker 2: We have mashed and mixed and flipped two songs. If
Speaker 2: you can guess both of them, you've got a thousand
Speaker 2: dollars worth of amazing neutral bullet stuff coming at you.
Speaker 2: If you guess one, you get three hundred bucks worth
Speaker 2: of stuff. And even if you bum out and you
Speaker 2: get absolutely nothing, you a brand new neutral bullet flip
Speaker 2: which is going to change your life.
Speaker 1: Let's go.
Speaker 2: Are you ready?
Speaker 9: Let's go?
Speaker 2: And who's this?
Speaker 1: Yes? So I think it's Dare by.
Speaker 7: The song Collees. Can't get you out of my head.
Speaker 2: Okay. So the good news is that you get your
Speaker 2: very own neutra bullet whlippe and your husband never needs
Speaker 2: to put his stinky protein in it. Now, I'm going
Speaker 2: to give you a tip, Alana, okay, because I have
Speaker 2: neutral bullet flip. Okay, and tonight guess what I'm going
Speaker 2: to be making in it. It just came to me
Speaker 2: on the way to work that basil pesto.
Speaker 7: I thought you were going to say a sneaky cocktail,
Speaker 7: but pesto will also do Alanna.
Speaker 2: You know I haven't had any fun or any booze
Speaker 2: in nearly four years.
Speaker 4: And Alana just so you never forget it was dual
Speaker 4: leaper illusion and Kylie's love at first sight. Ah tuns, heygister,
Speaker 4: you're welcome registered by the Nova Player app if you'd
Speaker 4: like to play tomorrow and have a crack at this competition.
Speaker 2: Because even if you suck it at worse than anyone's
Speaker 2: ever sucked at anything, you still got a brand and
Speaker 2: bullet flip.
Speaker 3: It's got your name unbelievable all over it.
Speaker 1: Correct the Chrissy Swan Show.
Speaker 2: I mean, if there's something I can get behind, it's
Speaker 2: Tina Arena on Nova.
Speaker 4: Excuse me, and Showers have done a brilliant job at
Speaker 4: bringing a fresh week to that.
Speaker 3: Yes, hey, can we just enjoy singing I kissed Girls?
Speaker 2: Oh God, I just can't wait for my level and say, hey,
Speaker 2: do you have this cool new singer Tina Renna. I'm
Speaker 2: like Noah's joking.
Speaker 1: Chrissy's click fait.
Speaker 2: All right, we need to talk about Jacob Elordi, and
Speaker 2: we need to talk about him right now. If this
Speaker 2: is not a name you and that immediately evokes an
Speaker 2: image for you, we're talking about the guy that played
Speaker 2: Elvis in that the one. Yes, have you seen that?
Speaker 4: By the way, No, I haven't. It is good, and
Speaker 4: also Felix in Saltburn. But I came to love him
Speaker 4: as Nate in Euphoria.
Speaker 2: See I haven't seen Euphoria because I'm a little bit old.
Speaker 2: But yes, okay, So Jacob e Lordi is the most
Speaker 2: magnificent creature that's ever drawn. Breadth end of story, isn't it.
Speaker 2: That's the end of the story.
Speaker 4: He is my like number one dude. If he asked
Speaker 4: me suck his tail, I would toes. Yeah, I would
Speaker 4: suck Jake Lordy's toe and yuck.
Speaker 2: It's cheesy, even Jacob lord he's cheesy.
Speaker 3: It's not He's Jacob Laordia. Tuck it.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, that is a really big that's a
Speaker 2: really big.
Speaker 3: I know because I'm a germaphobe, clean free, I wouldn't.
Speaker 2: But what would I do? What would I do? No?
Speaker 2: I wouldn't know. I don't want any part of his
Speaker 2: body in my mouth. I would I would not yell
Speaker 2: at him if he filled the sink with water and
Speaker 2: then put dirty dishes in it and left them there.
Speaker 3: And that's where you and I differ because.
Speaker 2: I normally lose my crap over that. Jacob Elordi has
Speaker 2: been papped, and he knew that he was being papped.
Speaker 2: And because he's Jacob E Lordi and we love him,
Speaker 2: we're fine with him. Pos He's got the most magnificent
Speaker 2: pair of specs on. He's got his hair in some
Speaker 2: up some down with one of his girlfriend's pink clips.
Speaker 3: That's hot. That is anything he does.
Speaker 2: But he wears now polish too, he does. I think, yeah,
Speaker 2: I've seen it.
Speaker 3: I have seen him with it.
Speaker 2: He is wearing a shiny pair of sort of disco shorts,
Speaker 2: not unlike our girl Kyli Minogue's, and spinning around, but
Speaker 2: they're green brue and he's reading a book. Now Daily
Speaker 2: Mail has zoomed in on the book. It is not like,
Speaker 2: you know, Harry Potter or something. Of course, he's chosen,
Speaker 2: probably from the Airbnb library, the Art of Cinema.
Speaker 3: That is so Jacob A Laudie.
Speaker 2: He knew he was being photographed.
Speaker 3: That's how we know we know he knew.
Speaker 2: I think it would have been cooler if he was
Speaker 2: reading like Flowers in the Attic. Do you remember everybody
Speaker 2: read Flowers Virginia Hendrew.
Speaker 4: Totally and Also he's on holiday with his girlfriend's parents.
Speaker 3: Olivia. What's her name, Olivia j Olivia J.
Speaker 2: Now she's the daughter of Laurie Lockton, who I think
Speaker 2: was from full House, and.
Speaker 3: Laurie paid for her to get into a college right
Speaker 3: and went to jail.
Speaker 2: I think I think she went to jail or she
Speaker 2: was at least like properly in court convicted over it.
Speaker 4: Do you know what else I love about Jacob e
Speaker 4: Lordie because he doesn't care about stereotypes, et cetera. He
Speaker 4: has the most incredible handbag collection, so he's always papped
Speaker 4: with like these beautiful designer bags, like there's Burken's, Like
Speaker 4: he collects them and he completely rocks them in a
Speaker 4: really masculine way.
Speaker 3: It's sick.
Speaker 2: I just love him so much. What's he doing next?
Speaker 2: Where can I see him?
Speaker 4: He'll be doing something, But I'm glad he's having a
Speaker 4: little holiday because he deserves it. No, Swanny, The next
Speaker 4: thing they need to do is film a new Euphorious season.
Speaker 2: Actually, I mean that we've yes, agreed, agreed, and then
Speaker 2: I will watch it. Yeah, but I think we're just
Speaker 2: gonna skim over the headline.
Speaker 3: Why now I'm going to read the headline, but I'm.
Speaker 2: Not going to talk about it because it's a bit
Speaker 2: off color. Jacoberlordie, is that a banana in your pocket?
Speaker 2: Or are you just happy to see Olivia chat? Which
Speaker 2: you know, I just I love the headlines on these
Speaker 2: naughtiess sorry publications. All right, what are we talking about next?
Speaker 3: Audi?
Speaker 2: Audi Aldi? Okay? So you think the middle ale in
Speaker 2: Aldi can't get any better? Imagine if I told you
Speaker 2: that they are bringing their special buys to your holidays.
Speaker 2: And I'm not talking about like convertible stools and tents
Speaker 2: and canopies. I'm talking about they are opening up a
Speaker 2: travel arm hue and we're talking like Vietnam for five
Speaker 2: nights before ninety nine. Wow, like unbelievable. I hope they
Speaker 2: don't sell out as quickly as you know, the solar
Speaker 2: powered fairy Light Ivy Trellis.
Speaker 3: Oh, they absolutely will.
Speaker 1: The Chrissy Swan Show.
Speaker 2: You know, I know that I'm not alone in that,
Speaker 2: so many obligations and all of that. The most sort
Speaker 2: of media that I consume is often just the trailer.
Speaker 3: Yes, of certain shows and movies.
Speaker 2: Yeah exactly, But I've seen a good trailer.
Speaker 3: Give it to me.
Speaker 2: So you know Yelena Dockitch the tennis player because I
Speaker 2: don't sort of I don't identify with sport at all,
Speaker 2: and I don't follow anything. I've missed the whole Lena
Speaker 2: Dockage think she's a tennis player. Anyway, I saw the
Speaker 2: doco about her life and her incredibly traumatic relationship with
Speaker 2: her terrible father. The documentary looks amazing.
Speaker 3: I've not even heard that she's done a docos.
Speaker 2: Either, had I, but I saw the trailer this morning
Speaker 2: on Instagram because I follow Village Roto Films. It's a
Speaker 2: local doco. I'm definitely going to track it down. It
Speaker 2: looks incredible, fantastic.
Speaker 3: I love that.
Speaker 4: Hey, I also love Kylie Minoguan. Next, Increasy's Quizzy. We
Speaker 4: have a double pass to go and see her because
Speaker 4: she is bringing back her attention to it to Australia.
Speaker 4: For shows, You've got to jump on Frontier Touring dot
Speaker 4: com to get the tickets because they're selling out.
Speaker 1: The Chrissy Swan Show, The Chrissy Swan Show.
Speaker 3: This is exciting.
Speaker 1: Chrissy's Quizzy.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, and it's not just any quizzy. The bumbag
Speaker 2: is great, Don't get me wrong. It's changed my life.
Speaker 2: But do you know what's going to change your life
Speaker 2: even more?
Speaker 3: Kylie Minogue tickets.
Speaker 4: She is back and bringing her attention to her to
Speaker 4: Australia for shows nationally. All tickets on sale now. For details,
Speaker 4: head to fronted Touring dot com.
Speaker 2: Olivia, you wouldn't have seen Kylie live? No, I never have,
Speaker 2: either of I. If you win this, can I be
Speaker 2: your plus one?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 8: Maybe I'll have to take you.
Speaker 2: I mean, how old are you? Let me just ask?
Speaker 2: How old are you?
Speaker 8: I'm twenty?
Speaker 2: Don't you love that? Kylie Mino I know is in
Speaker 2: her mid fifties. We've loved her forever. Olivia's twenty and
Speaker 2: a brand new fan.
Speaker 3: What's your favorite Kylie song? Olivia?
Speaker 7: I mean, I love.
Speaker 8: Kin gets you out of my head.
Speaker 9: That's probably my first.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that is great? All right, let's move on to Juleione.
Speaker 2: How badly do you want this ticket?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 7: So badly. I've watched Kylie since a teenager and her
Speaker 7: old TV hits or rage, but never seen her in concerts.
Speaker 2: On me neither, and she seems to really just come
Speaker 2: into her own as an art lately.
Speaker 3: You know this is incredible elite?
Speaker 2: All right, ladies, your names are your buzzes? May the
Speaker 2: best person win best of five? Question number one, which
Speaker 2: popstar got married to an alligator tour guide this week? Olivia? Yes? Olivia?
Speaker 7: Lana's alray Yes?
Speaker 2: What's your take on that?
Speaker 6: Live?
Speaker 2: What do you think? I mean?
Speaker 8: It's quite fast? I thought the only mother for like
Speaker 8: a mom.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: They haven't known each other very long. Just seems like
Speaker 2: a very long boated draw.
Speaker 3: Yea and in a nice bogan thrifted wedding dress.
Speaker 2: Question number two in the business landscape, what does the
Speaker 2: acronym EO W stand for? I did not know? Olivia? Yes, Olivia?
Speaker 7: Does it mean end of week?
Speaker 2: It does mean end of the week? I onily, No,
Speaker 2: end of day or close the business?
Speaker 3: Question number three, can you.
Speaker 2: Name this Kylie Minogue song song?
Speaker 7: Yes?
Speaker 2: What did you say?
Speaker 6: Kay?
Speaker 7: Gay?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 7: Stay?
Speaker 2: No, it's not gay and it's not stay.
Speaker 3: Do you know?
Speaker 2: It's one of the great slow Oh? I love it
Speaker 2: when she's a slunny, don't.
Speaker 3: You She's so in this video?
Speaker 2: Oh? And my god, that's the second single off. I
Speaker 2: can't even think of the name of it, but my god,
Speaker 2: all right? Question number four said Michael giant Aldi has
Speaker 2: today announced there Yes, Leone.
Speaker 3: Holidays.
Speaker 2: Yes, how exciting.
Speaker 3: Two points will leave you at one point to Leoni.
Speaker 2: Question number five, Rio de Janeiro is a city found
Speaker 2: in which country? Yes, bil it is Brazil. That's to
Speaker 2: a piece for the win.
Speaker 3: Question number six, goode.
Speaker 2: A ram is a male?
Speaker 4: What?
Speaker 3: Yes?
Speaker 2: The one for the wind it is a sheep. And
Speaker 2: you are going to see our girl Kyli Minogle live
Speaker 2: for the very first time. Well done.
Speaker 7: Oh I can't wait.
Speaker 3: Thank you so good.
Speaker 4: Sorry, Olivia will be playing again across the next few
Speaker 4: days though, Okay, so try.
Speaker 3: Again, Okay, thank you. Good on your goals.
Speaker 1: The Christy Swan Show.
Speaker 2: Sperm facials. Sorry, yes, lamar odom human No, I don't
Speaker 2: know fish. Fish did not say that, you did not?
Speaker 3: Sorry?
Speaker 2: I thought anyway, Hey, you have heard of these sorts
Speaker 2: of things. And there is a very fancy brand. I
Speaker 2: can't remember what it is. It's French. And they were
Speaker 2: the first to talk about caviar, you know, caviar facials,
Speaker 2: caviar caviar that is just fish sperm essentially eggs, you know.
Speaker 4: Can I tell you just side note, I went to this.
Speaker 4: This sounds so unrelatable, I note, but I went to
Speaker 4: a cavear lunch a couple of weeks ago, and we
Speaker 4: had the Queen of Caviar in Australia there giving us
Speaker 4: a full education on caviar. Caviari is so good for
Speaker 4: you and so good for your heart and brain, is it?
Speaker 4: It was quite amazing to learn about it.
Speaker 3: Don't shut up. I'm just saying it's a good fact
Speaker 3: for people to know.
Speaker 2: And it doesn't matter that it costs five hundred dollars
Speaker 2: for a tiny spoonful.
Speaker 3: You got to treat yourself sometimes.
Speaker 2: I mean you can get super Marchael Bran Taramasalada. That's there,
Speaker 2: you go. All right, let's go back to these crazy facials.
Speaker 2: Lamar Odom who is you know in with the Kardashians
Speaker 2: was that's how well, that's how you know his name.
Speaker 2: I have no idea who he was unless.
Speaker 4: He was he was a two time NBA champion as well.
Speaker 4: He was like a proper basketball ledge.
Speaker 2: But he's obviously a man that cares about his physical appeal.
Speaker 3: Yes, because apparently.
Speaker 2: These fish sperm facials make you look younger and regenerate yourselves.
Speaker 2: And I mean they see us coming, don't they They
Speaker 2: really do?
Speaker 3: Because how do you ever actually prove that.
Speaker 2: You can't prove that.
Speaker 4: It's like, remember we spoke about that time Charlie XC
Speaker 4: sat in a marketing meeting and had all these ridiculous
Speaker 4: ideas pitched to her.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what was one of them? I remember reading that
Speaker 2: article and going, oh my.
Speaker 3: God, rubber shop. Yes.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like they've sat down. All these heads of
Speaker 4: beauty brands are gone. Hey, I reckon salmon sperm fecial
Speaker 4: is what's going to be the next?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's whack going up.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, you know, but there are plenty of foods.
Speaker 3: Caitlyn gets it. Caitlyn's on board.
Speaker 2: What would Caitlyn say if she had one of them?
Speaker 2: Do you think I had one last night? I thought
Speaker 2: it was Caitlyn Jenner cals my favorite. Anyway, they see
Speaker 2: us coming and we will put anything on our faces
Speaker 2: or in our bodies if somebody tells us it will
Speaker 2: make us look younger or thinner. End of story, and
Speaker 2: we've all done it. Thirteen twenty fourteen. What is the
Speaker 2: craziest thing that you have committed to and done every day,
Speaker 2: or signed up for or turned up to an appointment
Speaker 2: for that you look back on and you go, I
Speaker 2: clearly lost my mind at that stage.
Speaker 3: I properly drank some kool aid.
Speaker 2: Properly drank it. I've written a very small and very
Speaker 2: incomplete list of the things that I have been that
Speaker 2: I've subjected myself to. Intermittent fasting.
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, I mean, if you want a breath.
Speaker 2: That smells like a fresh dog pooet from the park,
Speaker 2: that's what you've got it.
Speaker 3: Hey, apparently that actually works onan like he was just starting.
Speaker 3: Yeah no, but at least it gets results.
Speaker 2: Intermittent fasting interval training.
Speaker 3: I think that works too.
Speaker 2: Who cares, it's torture calorie counting. For about a year,
Speaker 2: I went nowhere without this weird book that I bought
Speaker 2: from the newsagent in my back pocket just for bad news,
Speaker 2: you know.
Speaker 4: Oh, because that was before you could just use my
Speaker 4: fitness pal, having to actually get a book out.
Speaker 2: Yes, my my mum ate nothing but boiled eggs and
Speaker 2: wine and champagne for months, because she'd read somewhere that
Speaker 2: it was, you know, and I'm sure the champagne was
Speaker 2: exactly what she was after. Have you seen those vampire
Speaker 2: facials where your face is full of blood. I haven't
Speaker 2: had one of them, but surely you look back on
Speaker 2: that and go, what was I thinking? What have you done?
Speaker 2: You must have You're a very level headed person. Plus
Speaker 2: you've got the advantage of being a male, and men
Speaker 2: aren't pitched this stuff.
Speaker 3: And also at twenty seven, I haven't tried too much yet.
Speaker 2: But well some would beg to dig that. We're talking about,
Speaker 2: you know, crazy treatments.
Speaker 4: So no, I've never No crazy treatment comes to mind.
Speaker 4: But obviously I went to an art school and when
Speaker 4: we were dancing, I remember and Tom will be able
Speaker 4: to remember this. We were always told before we consumed food,
Speaker 4: ask yourself, would a racehorse eat that?
Speaker 2: Oh? How ridiculous?
Speaker 3: Yeah, so it's like an apple. Would a racehorse eat that?
Speaker 2: Don't racehorses have ketamine?
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I wish we knew that back then.
Speaker 2: It's a tranquilizer for horses.
Speaker 3: Twenty four to ten.
Speaker 4: When did you drink the kool aid and try a
Speaker 4: crazy beauty treatment or a silly diet?
Speaker 2: The Crazy Swan Show mar Odam a grown man has
Speaker 2: submitted himself to the latest beauty treatment, which is a
Speaker 2: fish sperm facial. What I wouldn't do that? No, I
Speaker 2: mean having said that I have eaten what was that
Speaker 2: thing I ate in Japan. It was like, oh you
Speaker 2: ate it was someone's testicle. No, I ate raw horse,
Speaker 2: Yes I did. I didn't need a horses testicle that
Speaker 2: would be big. No, it was something gross. Anyway, I've
Speaker 2: blocked it out. Such was the memory.
Speaker 3: It wasn't cod sperm, cod sperm, cod sperm.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was disgusting.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's a lot.
Speaker 4: But also if I were like a salmon sperm facial,
Speaker 4: I don't think the salmon span would be too offensive.
Speaker 2: What would that smell like? And also how to get it?
Speaker 3: I know that's a really great question.
Speaker 2: I was thinking that, but like, is it the same
Speaker 2: as you know people that have to that the people
Speaker 2: decide to donate, you know, do they do they send
Speaker 2: the fish off into the toilet with a dirty magazine
Speaker 2: like a donor dust? Like do what craziest things that
Speaker 2: you have submitted yourself to? Hi? Bianca? Hello? How are you?
Speaker 2: What is ce moss gell?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 8: Honestly, Chrissy, it's the worst thing you'll ever put in
Speaker 8: your mouth. But it's all over TikTok at the moment.
Speaker 8: So I like paved in and bought the biggest jar
Speaker 8: and it's like overproved jelly, like it's the thickest thing
Speaker 8: that makes you gag. And I have it every morning,
Speaker 8: and it's meant to have like ninety eight of one
Speaker 8: hundred and two minerals that our body needs. That was
Speaker 8: like the slogan, so I fell for it. But yeah,
Speaker 8: it's not good at all. I haven't seen any improvements
Speaker 8: in my anything.
Speaker 2: It just reminded me. I remember I used to have
Speaker 2: what it's not chlorophyl chlorophyl, it's like the green things.
Speaker 7: I've tried that as well.
Speaker 4: With the seamos gel. How do you ingest it? Are
Speaker 4: you putting it in a drink or just straight?
Speaker 8: You can put it in smoothies, but I like you say,
Speaker 8: raw jogger. You just put it on the screen and
Speaker 8: put in your mouth and go for it.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I'm remembering all these stupid things I did.
Speaker 2: I used to grow wheat grass on my windowsills.
Speaker 3: Fristline pharmacy voucher for you, bi anker. Let's go to Diana.
Speaker 2: Diana. What is derma Brasier.
Speaker 7: It's very, very popular. It's been around for a few years. Basically,
Speaker 7: you go to like a skin specialist clinic and they
Speaker 7: take off the top layer of your skin, and it's
Speaker 7: supposed to stimulate collagen, and you do go a little
Speaker 7: bit red, and but after about a week or so,
Speaker 7: you calm down or something. You know, some people don't
Speaker 7: go red at all, others go red.
Speaker 2: Does it hurt?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 7: No, And basically it's it just stimulates collogen supposed to
Speaker 7: you know, it takes off the top layer, so you're
Speaker 7: supposed to look youthful after that. Well, and it costs,
Speaker 7: like it paints, like three hundred dollars to do this.
Speaker 7: And then my one of my girlfriends, her husband is
Speaker 7: a dermatologist. That's it. I couldn't think of the word dermatologist.
Speaker 7: And he said, what are you girls doing? You know
Speaker 7: you're spending hundreds thousands of dollars. Lemon juice does exactly
Speaker 7: the same thing. Just pop it on your face, leave
Speaker 7: it for no more than a minute, and then wipe
Speaker 7: it off. And I thought, oh my god, Okay.
Speaker 2: I'm going to try that.
Speaker 3: It's like my mum used to tell me when I
Speaker 3: was a kid and all I wanted was blonde tips,
Speaker 3: go sit outside with lemon juice and work. Absolutely not
Speaker 3: Priceline farms. You'voutch a fore Diana Alana.
Speaker 2: Hello, what is Chinese ballerina? Teacher says, So you coming?
Speaker 6: So I really wanted to swim down a bit for
Speaker 6: formal and my mom was like, Hey, there's a really
Speaker 6: easy way you can do that. There's a thing you
Speaker 6: can get from the Asian Graces and you just boil
Speaker 6: your kettle, put the tea bags in, let it seeps
Speaker 6: and get real brown for like twenty minutes, and anything
Speaker 6: you ate that day would rumble in your belly by
Speaker 6: two in the morning and you'd have to run to
Speaker 6: the bathroom.
Speaker 2: That sounds like fresh.
Speaker 3: Hell awful.
Speaker 4: A lot of press on pharmacy about your let's really
Speaker 4: quickly finish with Candace.
Speaker 3: What have you tried? Hi?
Speaker 2: There?
Speaker 7: So I eat dried snake skin like chips.
Speaker 2: What where do you get that from? It?
Speaker 7: I'd buy them online?
Speaker 3: Oh my steak skin.
Speaker 7: Yeah, and it's actually quite tasty and it's got many
Speaker 7: health benefits.
Speaker 8: And I find that my skin has been glowing and
Speaker 8: my hair's growing extra long.
Speaker 3: Oh, Candace has fully dropped.
Speaker 1: The slim show.
Speaker 2: Let's talk trap kilt Chrissy's click face. Hey, look we
Speaker 2: are going to be doing correspondence on Friday. So send
Speaker 2: us a letter if you don't like the fact that
Speaker 2: I've mentioned Taylor Swift and Travis Kelts in the same show.
Speaker 4: Also, I feel like today there's several things we've spoken
Speaker 4: about that a lot of people might not like. Please
Speaker 4: slide into our DMS at the Crisis One show that's
Speaker 4: exactly what you think, including our boss.
Speaker 3: I'd love to hear from her.
Speaker 2: Travis Kels has got a new boss who he is
Speaker 2: now a game show host, and his boss is a network.
Speaker 2: He is now the host of Are You Smarter Than
Speaker 2: a Celebrity? Now, I thought that this wasn't going to happen,
Speaker 2: or it was going to be way down the track, yeah, because.
Speaker 3: We only spoke about this a couple of months ago.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and then there he is in his sort of
Speaker 2: you know, cream on cream suit.
Speaker 4: That suit looks terrible on him. Just whoever's styling him pale,
Speaker 4: pink or blush is not for trav.
Speaker 2: No, and it's a bad sort of my vice look,
Speaker 2: So he could have been a lot better. I mean, look,
Speaker 2: he probably did get it from Big and Tall totally.
Speaker 3: Should we listen to the trailer and see how Listen?
Speaker 1: Hello everybody, I'm Travis Kelsey, and welcome to are You.
Speaker 4: The game show where people can win ridiculous money just
Speaker 4: by answering questions about stuff we all learned back at
Speaker 4: elementary school.
Speaker 2: He sounds really nice, you know what.
Speaker 4: He's got the right amount of like goof and boganicness
Speaker 4: to be a perfect host of those types of shows.
Speaker 2: Yes, and he's got the AUTOQ down, Pat. I'm very
Speaker 2: very critical of AUTOQ people because you can hear when
Speaker 2: someone's reading something. You can't tell that he's reading that. No,
Speaker 2: and just hearing his lovely voice like that. You know
Speaker 2: that it took him about six months or closet of
Speaker 2: a year to stop calling his girlfriend Taylor swift Man.
Speaker 2: What Yeah, she had to say to him, don't have
Speaker 2: to call me mam anymore, ma'am. No, ma'am. He's one
Speaker 2: of those proper brought up Southern guys.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you get irritating, yes, ma'am.
Speaker 4: And now I want to know who in Australia sucks
Speaker 4: at auto Q? Can you off air?
Speaker 3: Can you think of someone that you can tell me?
Speaker 2: When I block it out? It's that traumatizing for me.
Speaker 2: I can't think of any names. I hope he does well.
Speaker 2: I like him a bit more after that, do you. Yeah?
Speaker 4: No, I'm happy for him, like good and people like
Speaker 4: that deserve those sort of shows and success.
Speaker 2: I agreet Nicole Kibman's daughter, Sunday. Sunday Rouse has made
Speaker 2: her runway debut for Mew Mew is that how you
Speaker 2: pronounce you? Swanny at Paris Fashion Week and she I'm sorry,
Speaker 2: I know that you think she looks like her mom.
Speaker 2: She looks so much like her dad, Keify.
Speaker 3: Do you she looks like Keithy?
Speaker 2: She is the image of Keify, the little one what's
Speaker 2: her name? Faith? She's like Nicole all right, but this one.
Speaker 2: And it goes with y rule that the firstborn daughter
Speaker 2: always looks like the dad. Got in the first born's
Speaker 2: son always looks like the mum.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: I feel like that's the case for my sister Geordia,
Speaker 4: and I I make the rules. Hey when she there's
Speaker 4: a photo here of her walking down the.
Speaker 2: Catwalkers, I'm very serious.
Speaker 4: She looks like I do or did sorry in primary
Speaker 4: school when I was asked to go to the school
Speaker 4: principal's office, It's like you're walking with swift pace, but
Speaker 4: your eye gaze is slightly down, just so no one
Speaker 4: catches your right and you.
Speaker 3: Have to explain where you're exactly.
Speaker 2: She I cannot believe she's only sixteen. Yeah, nuts, that
Speaker 2: is crazy. Also, that Jenny girl.
Speaker 3: She upstage Sunday. I gotta say, oh my god, because.
Speaker 4: We're used to seeing Kendall Jenna walk down the runway,
Speaker 4: but Kylie has walked gay.
Speaker 2: And I saw a little snippet on Instagram this week
Speaker 2: of her getting ready for an event, and I think
Speaker 2: it was this one. Yeah, she looks remarkable.
Speaker 3: She's never looked better.
Speaker 4: I agree she's snatched, she's let go of some of
Speaker 4: the filler, like she's dissolved some of that filler.
Speaker 3: I think. So she looks more natural.
Speaker 2: Just and she seems like a nice girl.
Speaker 3: She's a vibe. Yeah, loved party with her and she goes.
Speaker 2: To Timothy Shalamte.
Speaker 3: Actually that's a really great question, swam.
Speaker 2: I think she is. But remember she did that big
Speaker 2: thing where she was like, I'm not talking about it.
Speaker 2: I've been in the public eut since I was ten.
Speaker 3: Yeah, leave me alone. Love.
Speaker 4: It also pretty cool to walk in front of Disneyland Paris.
Speaker 4: That's the runway she walks down.
Speaker 2: I don't feel like that's chic enough. I don't like
Speaker 2: that as a backdrop. I don't like people to get
Speaker 2: married there. I don't like people to get you know,
Speaker 2: baby showers. No, it's just a family theme park and
Speaker 2: leave it. Don't try and turn it into something else.
Speaker 4: We are back tomorrow, and if you have an unpopular
Speaker 4: opinion like that, make sure you call us for sweeping statements.
Speaker 1: Chrissy Swan Show is a Nova podcast.
Speaker 2: For more great comedy shows like this, head to Nova
Speaker 2: podcast dot com.
Speaker 1: Are you