1 00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:03,400 Speaker 1: We'd like to acknowledge that traditional custodians of the land 2 00:00:03,520 --> 00:00:06,840 Speaker 1: on which this podcast was produced, the Galligall people of 3 00:00:06,920 --> 00:00:10,440 Speaker 1: the Orination. We pay our respects to elder's past and present. 4 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:15,400 Speaker 2: It's November twenty twenty one and we're in Adelaid's Flinders 5 00:00:15,400 --> 00:00:21,000 Speaker 2: Hospital with Kelly Finlayson. Kelly gave birth to baby Sophia 6 00:00:21,160 --> 00:00:24,840 Speaker 2: just three months ago, her first child with AFL star 7 00:00:25,280 --> 00:00:30,520 Speaker 2: Jeremy Finlayson. But today she isn't here for a postpartum checkup. 8 00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:35,199 Speaker 2: She's here for a kolonoscopy, the one she's been waiting 9 00:00:35,280 --> 00:00:38,840 Speaker 2: months for, which was canceled in the height of the pandemic. 10 00:00:41,320 --> 00:00:45,159 Speaker 2: Almost immediately the kolonoscopy takes a turn for the worst. 11 00:00:46,440 --> 00:00:51,159 Speaker 2: The gastro enterologist turns to Kelly and says, this is 12 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:56,120 Speaker 2: what cancer looks like for the twenty five year old mum. 13 00:00:56,360 --> 00:01:01,320 Speaker 2: Her world changes in an instant. In the days, she'd 14 00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:09,560 Speaker 2: be told she has stage four bow cancer. I'm at 15 00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:14,920 Speaker 2: Middleton and this is head Game today, resilience in the 16 00:01:14,959 --> 00:01:23,520 Speaker 2: face of an unthinkable diagnosis. Kelly Finlayson, thank you so 17 00:01:23,640 --> 00:01:26,959 Speaker 2: much for joining me on my podcast head Game. Now 18 00:01:27,040 --> 00:01:30,320 Speaker 2: cop talk about head Game and you're someone that needs 19 00:01:30,360 --> 00:01:32,120 Speaker 2: to have your head in the game. You need to 20 00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:35,080 Speaker 2: be headstrong with what's going on in your life at 21 00:01:35,120 --> 00:01:38,720 Speaker 2: the moment. Wow, we'll get into that very very shortly. 22 00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:39,800 Speaker 2: But how are you. 23 00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:42,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm actually doing okay today. 24 00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:49,000 Speaker 2: Okay? Is okay? Kelly? Take me back to your childhood. 25 00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:54,520 Speaker 3: So I lived a pretty mundane, easy, ordinary childhood. I 26 00:01:54,560 --> 00:01:59,000 Speaker 3: have a younger brother, mum and dad, same house, still 27 00:01:59,040 --> 00:02:00,440 Speaker 3: live in the same house that I was born in. 28 00:02:00,680 --> 00:02:04,680 Speaker 3: They do, I don't, but so yeah, like a pretty 29 00:02:04,880 --> 00:02:09,000 Speaker 3: easy country town, Port Lincoln, so right on the beach 30 00:02:10,280 --> 00:02:13,320 Speaker 3: here an essay, and played every sport you can think of. 31 00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:16,519 Speaker 3: So I was just a busy little girl with lots 32 00:02:16,560 --> 00:02:19,919 Speaker 3: of energy and not much has changed. Really, just a confident, 33 00:02:19,960 --> 00:02:21,959 Speaker 3: little independent person. 34 00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:24,400 Speaker 2: Sounds like you just see it, like myself. A normal 35 00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:28,360 Speaker 2: upbring in, happy, go lucky. What was your first ever job? 36 00:02:29,680 --> 00:02:32,040 Speaker 3: Yeah, my mum was a manager of a hotel, So 37 00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:32,919 Speaker 3: a housekeeper. 38 00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:38,280 Speaker 2: Oh really? Yeah, so you went around changing the sheets 39 00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:41,200 Speaker 2: and clean bathrooms and stuff like that. 40 00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:43,920 Speaker 3: Yeah, very underage, but that's how we would get like 41 00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:47,280 Speaker 3: that's my pocket money, I guess, would be whatever four 42 00:02:47,320 --> 00:02:49,919 Speaker 3: hours on a Sunday morning or whatever, and that would 43 00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:51,440 Speaker 3: be me housekeeping. Yep. 44 00:02:52,560 --> 00:02:55,360 Speaker 2: How old are you if you don't mind me asking, Kelly. 45 00:02:55,520 --> 00:02:58,400 Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm twenty eight. I'm twenty nine in December. 46 00:02:58,080 --> 00:03:01,120 Speaker 2: Twenty nine, December. And what age were you when you 47 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:01,800 Speaker 2: met Jeremy? 48 00:03:02,520 --> 00:03:04,640 Speaker 3: I was twenty one at a Justin Bieber concert. 49 00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:08,400 Speaker 2: Take me back to that, Justinean, How did you set 50 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:11,480 Speaker 2: eyes on him? And how was it love at first 51 00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:14,200 Speaker 2: sight or was it just a case of exchange phone 52 00:03:14,280 --> 00:03:15,679 Speaker 2: numbers and we're going on a date? 53 00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:21,560 Speaker 3: Exchanged snapchats because we were young twenty one year olds. 54 00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:23,560 Speaker 3: But I didn't actually meet him at the concert. I 55 00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:25,520 Speaker 3: was just insandnely for the concert and we met at 56 00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:28,600 Speaker 3: a pub later. But he is a big Justin Bieber fan, 57 00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:30,000 Speaker 3: so I like to drop that in. 58 00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:35,680 Speaker 2: Yes, Jeremy, listen, he's is it a believer? A belief? 59 00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:36,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's it. 60 00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:42,440 Speaker 2: So that moment changes your life, really, doesn't it. You 61 00:03:42,440 --> 00:03:46,800 Speaker 2: You meet Jeremy and did the relationship develop quite fast? 62 00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:51,800 Speaker 3: Yeah? Very quick? Moving our relationship so again, yeah, rekindled 63 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:55,040 Speaker 3: in twenty nineteen when I moved back to Australia and 64 00:03:55,080 --> 00:03:57,880 Speaker 3: then by June twenty twenty we were living together. So 65 00:03:58,360 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 3: six months later really. 66 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:03,920 Speaker 2: No, messing around their kedesis later, are you moving because 67 00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:06,040 Speaker 2: that's serious, right, moving in together? 68 00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:08,880 Speaker 3: Yeah, Well, it was the time of COVID, so it 69 00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:12,080 Speaker 3: was either moving together or in no, one'm going to 70 00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:12,880 Speaker 3: see each other again. 71 00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:15,560 Speaker 2: Did it feel nice? Did it feel good during COVID 72 00:04:15,600 --> 00:04:16,440 Speaker 2: that you had each other? 73 00:04:17,480 --> 00:04:21,200 Speaker 3: Yeah? Definitely. I think that obviously fast tracked a lot 74 00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:24,640 Speaker 3: of people's relationships, but it definitely made it, I guess 75 00:04:24,680 --> 00:04:26,719 Speaker 3: known that we were the people for each other. 76 00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:31,440 Speaker 2: And when did you start realizing that you had a 77 00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:33,960 Speaker 2: few issues or you had a few symptoms or maybe 78 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:34,920 Speaker 2: need to go to hospital. 79 00:04:35,839 --> 00:04:39,200 Speaker 3: Yeah. So the first time that I actually sought help 80 00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:43,920 Speaker 3: was at the start of twenty twenty two days actually 81 00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:48,440 Speaker 3: before lockdown happened in Victorious, So I had a colonostu 82 00:04:48,440 --> 00:04:52,000 Speaker 3: to be booked for the twenty second of March, and 83 00:04:52,040 --> 00:04:56,080 Speaker 3: then obviously locked down and elective procedures got canceled, so 84 00:04:56,120 --> 00:04:59,480 Speaker 3: I never actually got the procedure, but I did seek 85 00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:03,760 Speaker 3: help that month. But looking back now, I've had issues 86 00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:08,040 Speaker 3: for up to probably five years prior to diagnosis. 87 00:05:07,480 --> 00:05:09,360 Speaker 2: And what are or what were these issues? 88 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:16,839 Speaker 3: So in frequency, in bow movements, weight fluctuation, A lot 89 00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:19,480 Speaker 3: of the issues I guess that I was having were 90 00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:22,680 Speaker 3: really common with just being a female, So like abdominal 91 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:26,720 Speaker 3: bloating usually once a month, which obviously comes with the 92 00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:32,800 Speaker 3: mental cycle as well, the pain there as well, the 93 00:05:32,880 --> 00:05:38,200 Speaker 3: changing weight, the changeing tiredness. Like, all of the symptoms 94 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:40,800 Speaker 3: that I were having, I guess weren't uncommon, but the 95 00:05:40,839 --> 00:05:44,159 Speaker 3: way that I was having them were probably more often 96 00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:45,680 Speaker 3: than others were. 97 00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:49,440 Speaker 2: And what was the moment Why did you decide why 98 00:05:49,520 --> 00:05:52,160 Speaker 2: I need to go and check this out? Because if 99 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:53,880 Speaker 2: you say it's been going on for five years, you're 100 00:05:53,880 --> 00:05:57,000 Speaker 2: obviously just thinking that these are normal problems, just that 101 00:05:57,040 --> 00:05:59,760 Speaker 2: they go away. You know, it's just just the monthly 102 00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:03,920 Speaker 2: thing that happens. But what made what was that mindset 103 00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:05,800 Speaker 2: switch where you thought, actually, no, I need to go 104 00:06:05,839 --> 00:06:07,039 Speaker 2: and get this checked out. 105 00:06:07,760 --> 00:06:10,680 Speaker 3: Yeah. So I ended up having blood in my store, 106 00:06:10,839 --> 00:06:13,520 Speaker 3: well on the toilet paper, so obviously I couldn't tell 107 00:06:13,600 --> 00:06:16,320 Speaker 3: whether that was in my store or not. But that's 108 00:06:16,360 --> 00:06:19,920 Speaker 3: what made me go seek more help. I was seeing 109 00:06:19,920 --> 00:06:22,280 Speaker 3: an actual path. I thought maybe I was intolerant or something, 110 00:06:22,440 --> 00:06:27,200 Speaker 3: maybe I had yeah ibs or something like that. I 111 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:30,760 Speaker 3: don't know, something obviously not right, But it was kind 112 00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:33,279 Speaker 3: of cool to be lactose intolerant at that time or 113 00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:36,360 Speaker 3: have a gluten intolerant, so they didn't really take me 114 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:40,640 Speaker 3: very seriously. And then yeah, obviously I had blood in 115 00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:43,240 Speaker 3: a stall sample, so that's why I had the colonists 116 00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:46,159 Speaker 3: could be booked, which was later canceled as an elective procedure. 117 00:06:46,520 --> 00:06:49,000 Speaker 2: Wow. So do you think they didn't take you seriously 118 00:06:49,040 --> 00:06:53,520 Speaker 2: because you were young? You know you? Yeah, agile and 119 00:06:54,160 --> 00:06:56,880 Speaker 2: just a case of you know, you don't need you 120 00:06:56,920 --> 00:06:58,280 Speaker 2: don't need to check out, you're good to go. 121 00:06:58,600 --> 00:07:01,920 Speaker 3: Yeah. Well at that point I was twenty four, so 122 00:07:02,760 --> 00:07:05,760 Speaker 3: I was quite young. I was writing marathons like I 123 00:07:05,920 --> 00:07:12,360 Speaker 3: was the pinnacle of health. Nothing that would scream about cancer, 124 00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:13,120 Speaker 3: do you know what I mean? 125 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:20,360 Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, And during lockdown, the relationship with Jeremy Blossoms 126 00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:22,560 Speaker 2: and you fell pregnant. 127 00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:26,720 Speaker 3: Yeah. COVID babies, there's lots of them. Yeah, so we 128 00:07:26,920 --> 00:07:29,720 Speaker 3: actually felt pregnant at the six months after we were 129 00:07:29,720 --> 00:07:32,400 Speaker 3: living together, so it was really quickly turned around. 130 00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:35,120 Speaker 2: So you don't mess around, Kelly, No. 131 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:38,280 Speaker 3: We don't. When you know, you know exactly when you know, 132 00:07:38,360 --> 00:07:41,600 Speaker 3: you know. And we just spent three months in Queensland 133 00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:45,720 Speaker 3: with all of our teammates for Jeremy's teamates babies, and 134 00:07:46,040 --> 00:07:49,480 Speaker 3: I guess he saw how maternal I was, so when 135 00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:51,240 Speaker 3: we did fell pregnant, it was a no brainer and 136 00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:55,200 Speaker 3: obviously that was something we're really excited about. We ended 137 00:07:55,280 --> 00:07:58,320 Speaker 3: up having Sophia for giving birth to Sophia in the 138 00:07:58,360 --> 00:08:02,680 Speaker 3: hubs the next year, so that was really interesting. Jeremy 139 00:08:02,720 --> 00:08:05,720 Speaker 3: guests had to call time on his season otherwise he 140 00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:08,520 Speaker 3: would risk being locked out of the state that we 141 00:08:08,520 --> 00:08:11,640 Speaker 3: were already a foreign state. We're already in Queensland, whereas 142 00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:14,880 Speaker 3: we were living in Sydney. So yeah, it was a 143 00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:18,320 Speaker 3: big messy time of our life, but the best time 144 00:08:18,320 --> 00:08:19,559 Speaker 3: of our life all the same time. 145 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:22,720 Speaker 2: Is there anything that you know that stood out? Is 146 00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:25,440 Speaker 2: there anything that because you went through your whole pregnancy 147 00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:27,880 Speaker 2: with all your checkups and all your tests and then 148 00:08:28,080 --> 00:08:32,679 Speaker 2: you give birth, was there any major signs or major 149 00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:35,959 Speaker 2: sort of symptoms where you know, the doctor, the nurse 150 00:08:36,040 --> 00:08:38,520 Speaker 2: or whatever would go well, something's not right here, or 151 00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:41,040 Speaker 2: was no signs? 152 00:08:41,640 --> 00:08:45,920 Speaker 3: Yeah, there was nothing more than I'd already experienced. I 153 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:48,840 Speaker 3: did present to the hospital the emergency department a few 154 00:08:48,880 --> 00:08:52,080 Speaker 3: times prior to my pregnancy with the pains and stuff, 155 00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:53,680 Speaker 3: but every time I would just get told I had 156 00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:56,000 Speaker 3: COVID and to go home and have and rest, which 157 00:08:56,640 --> 00:08:58,600 Speaker 3: at the time, I guess everyone was scared of this 158 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:04,480 Speaker 3: viral disease, so I can't blame them. But during my pregnancy, 159 00:09:04,559 --> 00:09:06,320 Speaker 3: I had a lot of pressure in my pelvis, which 160 00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:08,079 Speaker 3: obviously makes sense now, but at the time we thought 161 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:10,240 Speaker 3: we just had a big baby. So it wasn't until 162 00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:13,000 Speaker 3: she was born and she was tiny that we were like, 163 00:09:13,160 --> 00:09:16,320 Speaker 3: where do all this pain come from? And also when 164 00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:21,040 Speaker 3: giving birth, they my placenter was like it looked like 165 00:09:21,120 --> 00:09:23,560 Speaker 3: a state had been like cut up basically, Like it 166 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:26,760 Speaker 3: wasn't a big bore, a big plate. It was like 167 00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:29,720 Speaker 3: all cut up meat, basically my placenter. So once they 168 00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:33,360 Speaker 3: saw that, they were like, there's something not right here. Yeah, 169 00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:36,120 Speaker 3: But they were the only signs really that something else 170 00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:38,480 Speaker 3: was wrong, and I wasn't just a pregnant woman. 171 00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:44,440 Speaker 2: How hard was it to get an appointment or booking 172 00:09:45,679 --> 00:09:47,640 Speaker 2: that you needed because you already had it counceled, you 173 00:09:47,679 --> 00:09:51,240 Speaker 2: had it counseled before you gave birth, and now they 174 00:09:51,280 --> 00:09:56,040 Speaker 2: see these signs. How long after to you actually revisit 175 00:09:56,080 --> 00:09:59,079 Speaker 2: the hospital for your colonoscopy? 176 00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:02,000 Speaker 3: So I was in complete denial and kind of just 177 00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:05,360 Speaker 3: putting everything I was experiencing down to being postpartum. I 178 00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:08,680 Speaker 3: guess I never had another berth to compare it to 179 00:10:08,679 --> 00:10:11,680 Speaker 3: to know that this wasn't really normal, Like not going 180 00:10:11,679 --> 00:10:14,280 Speaker 3: to the toilet for ten days at a time, and 181 00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:16,679 Speaker 3: then when I'm going, I'm going fifteen times in an 182 00:10:16,679 --> 00:10:19,720 Speaker 3: hour like that. I didn't realize that that's not normal. 183 00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:22,440 Speaker 3: And I was terrified to go the toil after giving birth. 184 00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:25,800 Speaker 3: Don't get me wrong, most women are, but I guess 185 00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:28,880 Speaker 3: I just had an extreme case of that. And it 186 00:10:28,960 --> 00:10:32,880 Speaker 3: wasn't until three months postpartum that Jeremy actually made a 187 00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:35,720 Speaker 3: joke about me needing a porterloo because of the frequency 188 00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:38,439 Speaker 3: that I needed to go every time we went for 189 00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:40,640 Speaker 3: a drive, I'd make him fully to the service station 190 00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:43,319 Speaker 3: or whatever it may be, and he, yeah, made a 191 00:10:43,360 --> 00:10:45,319 Speaker 3: joke about needing a portaloo. And then that was kind 192 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:48,280 Speaker 3: of my last straw that I didn't think was very funny, 193 00:10:48,320 --> 00:10:51,080 Speaker 3: and went and saw a GP who had me booked 194 00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:54,280 Speaker 3: to see a gastro ontologist the next day. So once 195 00:10:54,400 --> 00:10:57,559 Speaker 3: she heard my symptoms, which I'm really quite lucky because 196 00:10:57,600 --> 00:11:00,000 Speaker 3: I had just moved back to here, to Adelaide. We 197 00:11:00,080 --> 00:11:02,959 Speaker 3: got a trade with Jeremy's work. Had only been here 198 00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:05,760 Speaker 3: for two weeks and had to go see just a 199 00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:08,000 Speaker 3: bolk build GP, the closest one that I could find 200 00:11:08,120 --> 00:11:10,360 Speaker 3: the next available appointment, and I got really lucky that 201 00:11:10,360 --> 00:11:12,800 Speaker 3: it was a female GP that took me really seriously 202 00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:14,760 Speaker 3: as soon as I told her, I guess what was 203 00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:15,199 Speaker 3: going on? 204 00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:19,040 Speaker 2: And take me back to the day that you go. 205 00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:22,600 Speaker 2: It's three months after you've given birth, or they're thereabouts. 206 00:11:22,840 --> 00:11:28,840 Speaker 2: You go back in for your for your colonoscopy. Take 207 00:11:28,880 --> 00:11:31,560 Speaker 2: me through that day. Was it just you just thought 208 00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:33,880 Speaker 2: you're going to go in do this and then you're 209 00:11:33,880 --> 00:11:36,360 Speaker 2: going to walk out and you get the results whenever. 210 00:11:36,880 --> 00:11:38,400 Speaker 2: What was going through your mind on that day? 211 00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:41,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, Well, the hardest part of a kolonoscopy is the prep, 212 00:11:42,280 --> 00:11:44,520 Speaker 3: which I learned the hard way, and when you have 213 00:11:44,760 --> 00:11:48,840 Speaker 3: a complete bower block, it's quite hard to pass the prep. 214 00:11:49,559 --> 00:11:52,000 Speaker 3: I thought that I was just constipated, but obviously it 215 00:11:52,040 --> 00:11:54,400 Speaker 3: turned out that there was a fat tumor in my ass. 216 00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:59,320 Speaker 3: I say that very easily because that's just how it is. 217 00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:04,160 Speaker 3: But yeah, so I was at home with Sophia, so 218 00:12:04,200 --> 00:12:08,400 Speaker 3: my three month old breastfeeding still by myself because Jeremy 219 00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:10,840 Speaker 3: just started this new job here in Adelaide and he 220 00:12:10,920 --> 00:12:12,760 Speaker 3: had to do all the media and stuff around that, 221 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:15,480 Speaker 3: and I was taking the prep at the same time. 222 00:12:15,559 --> 00:12:18,640 Speaker 3: And he got home from wherever he had to be 223 00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:20,720 Speaker 3: that day and I was asleep on the shower floor 224 00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:22,560 Speaker 3: with the shower running, and she was asleep on the 225 00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:25,280 Speaker 3: bath mat next to me. So it kind of puts 226 00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:28,520 Speaker 3: in perspective how hard the prep was on my body 227 00:12:28,559 --> 00:12:30,560 Speaker 3: because I couldn't pass it the way you meant to. 228 00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:34,440 Speaker 3: I was throwing it back up. So that was the 229 00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:39,600 Speaker 3: morning of my colonoscopy. I presented to the day suite 230 00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:43,560 Speaker 3: at about midday. My kolonoscopy was booked for about two 231 00:12:43,600 --> 00:12:46,640 Speaker 3: o'clock that afternoon, And the part that I was the 232 00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:48,800 Speaker 3: most angry about, I guess was the fact that I 233 00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:50,960 Speaker 3: hadn't eaten for twenty four hours and it was kept 234 00:12:50,960 --> 00:12:55,520 Speaker 3: being delayed, which in hindsight obviously like really not the 235 00:12:55,559 --> 00:12:58,960 Speaker 3: biggest deal. I'm angry, Oh, I was, And when I 236 00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:01,640 Speaker 3: woke up and the nurses being so beautiful to me, 237 00:13:01,760 --> 00:13:04,000 Speaker 3: and like, obviously they knew exactly what was going on, 238 00:13:04,040 --> 00:13:05,640 Speaker 3: but I thought they were just being so nice because 239 00:13:05,640 --> 00:13:10,679 Speaker 3: I was starving. Yeah, and then I woke up thinking 240 00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:12,880 Speaker 3: not much of it. Maybe I'd get given a diet 241 00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:16,320 Speaker 3: plan or something like that. Like I had this little 242 00:13:16,320 --> 00:13:17,719 Speaker 3: baby that I had to look after. I couldn't be 243 00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:22,760 Speaker 3: looking after myself. I walked into the gastrotologist's little room 244 00:13:22,880 --> 00:13:24,560 Speaker 3: and he just turned around a piece of paper which 245 00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:27,120 Speaker 3: had photos of the insides of my bow. Obviously I 246 00:13:27,120 --> 00:13:29,000 Speaker 3: didn't know that that's what it was. But when he 247 00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:30,840 Speaker 3: turned it around, he's like, this is what bow cancer 248 00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:33,199 Speaker 3: looks like. And I was like, oh, yeah, and what 249 00:13:33,320 --> 00:13:35,520 Speaker 3: does my bows look like? And he's like, this is 250 00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:36,120 Speaker 3: your bow. 251 00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:39,400 Speaker 2: I was like, oh, that's how they broke. 252 00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:40,280 Speaker 3: That, that's how it was delivered. 253 00:13:40,480 --> 00:13:42,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, what bow cancer looks like. 254 00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:45,760 Speaker 3: Yeah. So I think that he does this every day 255 00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:48,400 Speaker 3: of his life. That it's kind of like if we 256 00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:49,760 Speaker 3: don't say it like this and we make a big 257 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:52,320 Speaker 3: deal about it, I don't know, it was so weird. 258 00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:56,000 Speaker 2: Well, it is a pretty big deal, to be fair, 259 00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:59,280 Speaker 2: And what's your first initial thought process after that? 260 00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:02,959 Speaker 3: Yeah, so I kind of yeah, I just went blank 261 00:14:03,080 --> 00:14:05,920 Speaker 3: a little bit. I didn't give him much, so he 262 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:08,480 Speaker 3: kept giving me more information. I guess he was just 263 00:14:08,520 --> 00:14:12,040 Speaker 3: speaking and speaking and speaking and speaking, And basically we 264 00:14:12,120 --> 00:14:14,680 Speaker 3: left off with he'd already spoken to his mate, a 265 00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:17,040 Speaker 3: surgeon here in Adelaide, and I was booked in to 266 00:14:17,040 --> 00:14:21,280 Speaker 3: see him tomorrow, like the day after after hours, So 267 00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:23,440 Speaker 3: as soon as he'd knocked off from work, basically he 268 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:27,240 Speaker 3: was just squeezing me in And that's how we left off. 269 00:14:27,280 --> 00:14:29,400 Speaker 3: So I left off with very little knowledge, knowing that 270 00:14:29,440 --> 00:14:31,640 Speaker 3: I had bow cancer with a piece of paper that 271 00:14:31,680 --> 00:14:34,320 Speaker 3: has photos of it, and knowing that I was going 272 00:14:34,320 --> 00:14:35,560 Speaker 3: to see the surgeon the next day. 273 00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:40,960 Speaker 2: Wow, so that's the only news you get. You don't 274 00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:43,400 Speaker 2: notice severity of it. Obviously, the next day you're going 275 00:14:43,440 --> 00:14:45,960 Speaker 2: to meet someone who's going to really really break it down. 276 00:14:46,280 --> 00:14:50,600 Speaker 2: What was that that period before that next meeting the 277 00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:54,760 Speaker 2: next day? What's going through your head? Where's your head at? 278 00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:55,600 Speaker 2: Where are you at? 279 00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:58,440 Speaker 3: Yeah? So I actually sat in the back seat of 280 00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:01,360 Speaker 3: the car with Sophia in her bascinette, which I hadn't 281 00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:05,200 Speaker 3: done for ages. I feel like I couldn't let her 282 00:15:05,200 --> 00:15:07,920 Speaker 3: out of my sight. It was almost like she was 283 00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:10,960 Speaker 3: gone without any even starting anything or even knowing what 284 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:14,240 Speaker 3: I was doing. Like that bond that we had was 285 00:15:14,280 --> 00:15:16,200 Speaker 3: about to be broken. Like It's like I knew before 286 00:15:16,200 --> 00:15:21,720 Speaker 3: I knew it was animalistic, almost how destrayed I was. 287 00:15:22,680 --> 00:15:25,720 Speaker 3: My husband, well, my boyfriend at the time, was on 288 00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:28,640 Speaker 3: the phone to my mum basically telling her to get 289 00:15:28,640 --> 00:15:31,080 Speaker 3: on the next flight with Again, we had no information, 290 00:15:31,160 --> 00:15:33,800 Speaker 3: so we couldn't even tell her the severity of it 291 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:37,320 Speaker 3: because we didn't know. He also caught a couple of 292 00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:40,360 Speaker 3: friends that were meeting me. They were at home when 293 00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:43,320 Speaker 3: I got home for them to try and help out, 294 00:15:43,360 --> 00:15:44,920 Speaker 3: I guess, But at the same time, I was like 295 00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:47,680 Speaker 3: not wanting help because I was like, I'm still able 296 00:15:47,720 --> 00:15:49,760 Speaker 3: to look after my own daughter. Like I'm like, I've 297 00:15:49,840 --> 00:15:52,000 Speaker 3: got a diagnosis, whatever it may be, but I'm still 298 00:15:52,080 --> 00:15:54,520 Speaker 3: nothing's happened, nothing's changed in the last day other than 299 00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:55,960 Speaker 3: a few words. 300 00:15:56,680 --> 00:16:04,000 Speaker 2: Psychologically, you're looking at your daughter, do you does it 301 00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:07,280 Speaker 2: break you? Does it? Or are you just thinking? Right? 302 00:16:07,280 --> 00:16:09,800 Speaker 2: I need to find out the severity of it. I 303 00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:11,600 Speaker 2: need to find out exactly what it is. 304 00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:11,840 Speaker 3: You know? 305 00:16:12,760 --> 00:16:15,640 Speaker 2: Or is your world literally crumbling in that car? 306 00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:21,360 Speaker 3: Yeah? Like I was, I was nowhere. I was literally nowhere. 307 00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:24,560 Speaker 3: My thoughts were complete, Marsh. I was incomplete denial or 308 00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:28,000 Speaker 3: I had I'd never heard of cancer and had it 309 00:16:28,080 --> 00:16:31,200 Speaker 3: linked to anyone younger than my grandparents. So it was 310 00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:35,200 Speaker 3: like it was just a weird, really weird reality to 311 00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:38,800 Speaker 3: be living in, especially knowing that it was directed at me. 312 00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:42,080 Speaker 3: Wasn't like I wasn't hearing on the news. I wasn't. 313 00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:45,120 Speaker 3: It was like it was real and I kind of 314 00:16:45,160 --> 00:16:47,440 Speaker 3: had to try and process that while also trying to 315 00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:52,440 Speaker 3: keep my head my head strong, funnily enough so that 316 00:16:52,560 --> 00:16:54,760 Speaker 3: my husband didn't crumble because I needed him to be 317 00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:56,640 Speaker 3: able to parent as well as me try to parent. 318 00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:59,080 Speaker 3: It was just there was so much happening, but at 319 00:16:59,080 --> 00:17:01,040 Speaker 3: the same time we didn't even know what we had 320 00:17:01,080 --> 00:17:03,000 Speaker 3: ahead of us, so it was so hard to try 321 00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:07,720 Speaker 3: and put things in place. But yeah, it was wild, 322 00:17:07,840 --> 00:17:11,120 Speaker 3: and I don't I don't think he really realized what 323 00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:13,400 Speaker 3: that was going to mean for us until obviously we'd 324 00:17:13,440 --> 00:17:14,800 Speaker 3: sat down and we'd gone through it. 325 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:17,879 Speaker 2: How does the next day play out? And did do 326 00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:22,119 Speaker 2: your parents fly in and who's there when you realize 327 00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:25,520 Speaker 2: the severity of the bow cancer that you have. 328 00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:28,560 Speaker 3: So one of my friends is quite medically inclined, and 329 00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:32,119 Speaker 3: she happened to show up that night that I was diagnosed, 330 00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:34,200 Speaker 3: so she was going through the paperwork and I guess 331 00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:36,639 Speaker 3: filling everyone in that was contacting me because I just 332 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:39,840 Speaker 3: went completely mute and didn't speak to anyone, didn't reply 333 00:17:39,920 --> 00:17:42,600 Speaker 3: to anyone, didn't answer phone calls. So she was, I guess, 334 00:17:42,720 --> 00:17:47,080 Speaker 3: being that person that everyone went through, and she could 335 00:17:47,080 --> 00:17:49,240 Speaker 3: tell mum just by looking at the photos that it 336 00:17:49,359 --> 00:17:53,199 Speaker 3: definitely wasn't stage one or two, potentially stage three, but 337 00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:56,360 Speaker 3: looking it was huge and it was everywhere like it's 338 00:17:56,359 --> 00:17:59,680 Speaker 3: probably going to be stage four. But so I bring 339 00:17:59,720 --> 00:18:02,400 Speaker 3: her with me to the surgeon's appointment, and my mum 340 00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:05,439 Speaker 3: rocked up that morning as well. So there was my mum, 341 00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:10,600 Speaker 3: my best friend, my Jeremy, my boyfriend, and Sophia were 342 00:18:10,600 --> 00:18:12,240 Speaker 3: all in the surgeon's office and he just had to 343 00:18:12,280 --> 00:18:15,480 Speaker 3: try and I guess explain. He quite literally drew pictures 344 00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:17,560 Speaker 3: to explain kind of what was going to go on, 345 00:18:17,760 --> 00:18:19,920 Speaker 3: because it was going in one ear and out the other. 346 00:18:20,040 --> 00:18:24,000 Speaker 3: But it wasn't until we had scan the following week 347 00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:27,280 Speaker 3: that we realized I guess that it had spread elsewhere, 348 00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:29,000 Speaker 3: so that it was stage. 349 00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:41,320 Speaker 2: Four, stage four cancer. What is stage four cancer? 350 00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:46,159 Speaker 3: Yes, it's actually stage four terminal cancer, which we wow. 351 00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:49,920 Speaker 3: The media loves to pick up that word, but it's 352 00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:54,280 Speaker 3: essentially just means that it's spread from the primary tumor, 353 00:18:54,320 --> 00:18:58,040 Speaker 3: which was in my rectum, to another organ. So if 354 00:18:58,080 --> 00:19:01,040 Speaker 3: it's only spread to the lymph nodes, it would be 355 00:19:01,080 --> 00:19:03,359 Speaker 3: stage three. If it was the primary tumor, and just 356 00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:05,960 Speaker 3: outside of the primary tumor in those linkhodes I be 357 00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:08,760 Speaker 3: stage two and stage one is just that tumor. 358 00:19:09,320 --> 00:19:14,199 Speaker 2: So you literally get told that you've got terminal cancer, 359 00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:18,520 Speaker 2: the worst possible outcome that you could have, you know, 360 00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:25,680 Speaker 2: hopeful and wished for. What's the atmosphere like in the 361 00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:30,719 Speaker 2: room when that word comes out, you've got terminal cancer? 362 00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:35,320 Speaker 3: It was a lot of confusion, I guess, only because 363 00:19:35,480 --> 00:19:39,000 Speaker 3: we've just heard of this cancer and now it's terminal. 364 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:44,920 Speaker 3: And my surgeon's body language went from we will cure 365 00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:48,160 Speaker 3: you you're twenty five years old to or will try 366 00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:51,679 Speaker 3: prolong your life as soon as he realized the extent 367 00:19:51,800 --> 00:19:55,320 Speaker 3: as well. It's not one that's easily cured, but it 368 00:19:55,720 --> 00:20:01,520 Speaker 3: is curable. About cancer is curable, it's just I'm one 369 00:20:01,520 --> 00:20:04,919 Speaker 3: of the unlucky cases that have yet to hit remissions. 370 00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:10,760 Speaker 3: So yeah, it was a lot at the time, and 371 00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:13,520 Speaker 3: all I was worried about was my fertility, and I 372 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:18,919 Speaker 3: guess the collateral damage that I know cancer brings obviously 373 00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:20,720 Speaker 3: a three month old, and that was my forefront of 374 00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:23,440 Speaker 3: my mind. Even having this diagnosis. All I was thinking 375 00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:26,760 Speaker 3: about was her future and her having siblings. And my 376 00:20:27,359 --> 00:20:29,080 Speaker 3: surgeon looked me dead in the eye and said, would 377 00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:32,680 Speaker 3: you rather give her a sibling or a mum? So 378 00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:35,000 Speaker 3: that kind of was my wake up call, like, holy shit, 379 00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:35,600 Speaker 3: this is real. 380 00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:41,560 Speaker 2: Wow, how does that affect you as a mother. 381 00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:43,800 Speaker 3: It's like I've failed her? 382 00:20:46,240 --> 00:20:46,720 Speaker 2: Why was that? 383 00:20:48,119 --> 00:20:51,520 Speaker 3: Well, yeah, I guess you have all these ideas and preconceived, 384 00:20:51,600 --> 00:20:54,800 Speaker 3: like lived experience of how you've grown up and how 385 00:20:54,880 --> 00:20:58,639 Speaker 3: you want your family to grow up, and then like 386 00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:02,320 Speaker 3: this little three month old, she can't do anything. She 387 00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:04,680 Speaker 3: doesn't have an opinion to be like I'd rather siblings, 388 00:21:04,720 --> 00:21:06,879 Speaker 3: Like obviously she's never gonna say that, but do you 389 00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:08,400 Speaker 3: know what I mean? Like, she doesn't get a say 390 00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:11,399 Speaker 3: in this, and we dictate how her life lives. And 391 00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:16,120 Speaker 3: in that moment, I was basically selfishly choosing myself over 392 00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:17,359 Speaker 3: her life. 393 00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:23,600 Speaker 2: And how does Jeremy and your family take the news, 394 00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:27,160 Speaker 2: Because again, going from zero to one hundred, like you said, 395 00:21:27,200 --> 00:21:31,760 Speaker 2: I've got cancer, then terminal and cah, How did your 396 00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:36,000 Speaker 2: family and especially Jeremy, your husband, what was there you know? 397 00:21:36,080 --> 00:21:37,920 Speaker 2: Initial response? I suppose. 398 00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:41,719 Speaker 3: I don't think anyone really processed it until we were 399 00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:43,720 Speaker 3: out of her, if that makes sense. So, like the 400 00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:47,120 Speaker 3: nine months of doing the treatment and the surgeries, because 401 00:21:47,119 --> 00:21:50,880 Speaker 3: it was surgery after surgery, it wasn't until we had 402 00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:54,879 Speaker 3: no appointment booked that we were like, that just happened, 403 00:21:54,920 --> 00:21:56,480 Speaker 3: and now we've got all of this to deal with. 404 00:21:58,440 --> 00:22:00,720 Speaker 3: And that was probably the hardest part because we weren't 405 00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:02,800 Speaker 3: then relying on any medical stuff. We had to rely 406 00:22:02,960 --> 00:22:06,919 Speaker 3: on our own thoughts and our own I guess decisions, 407 00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:09,879 Speaker 3: and yeah, we really had to guess, take control of 408 00:22:10,359 --> 00:22:12,600 Speaker 3: what had just happened, and deal with the collateral, which 409 00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:16,560 Speaker 3: no one talks about. When you're coming out of this battle, 410 00:22:16,840 --> 00:22:21,560 Speaker 3: as they call it, is what you're left without. A 411 00:22:21,640 --> 00:22:24,280 Speaker 3: lot's taken from you, and it's not just taken from 412 00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:27,280 Speaker 3: the patient, it's taken from everyone around you. My mom 413 00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:29,399 Speaker 3: had to quit her job, so she lost income. My 414 00:22:29,720 --> 00:22:31,520 Speaker 3: mom had to move in with us, so she was 415 00:22:31,560 --> 00:22:34,240 Speaker 3: away from my dad for nine months, so then he 416 00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:36,240 Speaker 3: was without her. He had to learn how to cook 417 00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:40,359 Speaker 3: and clean, which she's never done in his life. My husband, 418 00:22:40,480 --> 00:22:44,800 Speaker 3: lall fiance at the time, was without a mother. He 419 00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:46,840 Speaker 3: was being a dad and a mum or relying on 420 00:22:46,960 --> 00:22:49,520 Speaker 3: my mom to help him parent, which it's just not 421 00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:52,560 Speaker 3: something you would ever expect. And obviously they had to 422 00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:55,440 Speaker 3: grow a really good connection and learn how to parent 423 00:22:55,520 --> 00:23:00,439 Speaker 3: together as in laws. So yeah, there was a lot happening, 424 00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:03,920 Speaker 3: and I was kind of just in bed, rodding away, 425 00:23:04,640 --> 00:23:08,200 Speaker 3: trying to leave each day, trying my best when I could. 426 00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:10,240 Speaker 3: But there's not a lot of good days that I 427 00:23:10,359 --> 00:23:12,040 Speaker 3: had in those first nine months. 428 00:23:12,119 --> 00:23:14,560 Speaker 2: So but you've got to quick, right, You've got you 429 00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:18,680 Speaker 2: get this news terminal. Time's not on your side. What's 430 00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:22,360 Speaker 2: the first first thing that happens? And I you know, treatment, 431 00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:26,240 Speaker 2: how do you how do you progress with going right? Terminal? 432 00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:30,800 Speaker 2: Does that mean that it's irreversible or like you said, 433 00:23:30,920 --> 00:23:33,359 Speaker 2: you know they can cure bow camp. But that's so 434 00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:36,080 Speaker 2: what's the what's the the immediate treatment for that? 435 00:23:37,119 --> 00:23:39,760 Speaker 3: Yeah, like you said, as soon as I said terminal, 436 00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:43,800 Speaker 3: I assumed irreversible and obviously hoped and prayed and like 437 00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:47,840 Speaker 3: promised myself that I'd get through it. But the reality 438 00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:49,600 Speaker 3: was I was about to go through a hell of 439 00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:52,480 Speaker 3: a fight to try and even stay alive each day. 440 00:23:54,080 --> 00:23:58,080 Speaker 3: But my first point of call was weaning for breastfeeding. 441 00:23:58,119 --> 00:23:59,919 Speaker 3: And I obviously you've never done that, you're a man, 442 00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:05,320 Speaker 3: but weaning from breastfeeding hurts. It's a painful experience. And 443 00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:08,399 Speaker 3: then because I stopped breastfeeding, I got my first period, 444 00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:12,679 Speaker 3: which is a whole nother game. As I was literally 445 00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:14,639 Speaker 3: going to the hospital to get a stoma, so my 446 00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:18,040 Speaker 3: bows reverted to my stomach to pass. Because I had 447 00:24:18,080 --> 00:24:20,399 Speaker 3: a block, I couldn't go to the toilet, so I 448 00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:23,040 Speaker 3: was laying in the bed with these two fake stonmas 449 00:24:23,119 --> 00:24:25,680 Speaker 3: to choose which side to have it on. When I 450 00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:28,040 Speaker 3: got my first period, and I had massed artists because 451 00:24:28,040 --> 00:24:30,280 Speaker 3: I was weaning from breastfeeding. So that was all within 452 00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:34,320 Speaker 3: seven days of diagnosis, So it was absolutely crazy. I 453 00:24:34,680 --> 00:24:36,440 Speaker 3: like what I tell you, I had no time to 454 00:24:36,560 --> 00:24:39,560 Speaker 3: process it, and as much as I'm so glad, I 455 00:24:39,640 --> 00:24:42,160 Speaker 3: didn't because I wasn't able to, I guess go down 456 00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:46,399 Speaker 3: any dark thought paths or whatever. But yeah, I had 457 00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:48,680 Speaker 3: no time to process anything. It was just go, go, go, 458 00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:52,440 Speaker 3: trust what the doctor's saying and do what you told basically. 459 00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:55,840 Speaker 2: And what does that process look like. So you get 460 00:24:55,880 --> 00:25:00,359 Speaker 2: the news. I suppose they give you a program straight away. 461 00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:01,760 Speaker 2: What does that program look like? 462 00:25:02,880 --> 00:25:06,360 Speaker 3: Yep? So the stoma and then on my twenty sixth 463 00:25:06,359 --> 00:25:09,360 Speaker 3: birthday of the week after, I started radiotherapy every day 464 00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:14,920 Speaker 3: for five weeks as well as oral chemotherapy, So that 465 00:25:15,040 --> 00:25:17,520 Speaker 3: was over Christmas. That was from the sixth of December 466 00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:21,920 Speaker 3: until mid jan and then I had two weeks off 467 00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:25,800 Speaker 3: because who two weeks off before I started intravenous chemotherapy 468 00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:30,720 Speaker 3: for six months. So yeah, from November the twenty seventh 469 00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:34,960 Speaker 3: when I had my stoma surgery to what the end 470 00:25:35,080 --> 00:25:38,600 Speaker 3: of July, I was just go, go, go with treatment. 471 00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:43,200 Speaker 2: Do you feel like that, Well, it obviously did robbed 472 00:25:43,240 --> 00:25:45,720 Speaker 2: your time as a mother. You know, you've got Sophia. 473 00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:50,200 Speaker 2: Obviously the main thing is yourself to get to get treated. 474 00:25:50,320 --> 00:25:55,360 Speaker 2: But how does it affect your relationship with Sophia? 475 00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:58,760 Speaker 3: Yeah, so I went from her obviously needing me and 476 00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:02,040 Speaker 3: no one else really realistically because I was her breastfeeding 477 00:26:02,160 --> 00:26:06,399 Speaker 3: parent too, not many months later having her come to 478 00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:08,760 Speaker 3: the see me in hospital because I was there a lot, 479 00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:12,119 Speaker 3: and no longer like if she wanted a bottle, no 480 00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:15,040 Speaker 3: longer being like mummy, mummy. It was always Namma, which. 481 00:26:14,920 --> 00:26:15,440 Speaker 2: Is my mum. 482 00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:18,760 Speaker 3: So I guess I went from watching her need me 483 00:26:19,040 --> 00:26:22,400 Speaker 3: to not need me at all, and it was absolutely crazy. 484 00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:26,120 Speaker 3: It was definitely the hardest part was watching that, I guess, 485 00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:27,840 Speaker 3: disconnect between the two of us. 486 00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:31,480 Speaker 2: And how did you deal with that psychologically? How did 487 00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:33,840 Speaker 2: you think to yourself? Right, you know, I've got to 488 00:26:33,920 --> 00:26:36,119 Speaker 2: got no choice, I've got to get through this. It 489 00:26:36,240 --> 00:26:37,080 Speaker 2: must have been horrible. 490 00:26:37,880 --> 00:26:40,440 Speaker 3: Yeah, it was, like I said, the hardest part, But 491 00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:42,840 Speaker 3: it was definitely. There was a point where I was 492 00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:47,040 Speaker 3: almost jealous or envious of the people in my daughter's 493 00:26:47,119 --> 00:26:49,320 Speaker 3: life that she called five women in her life mum 494 00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:51,800 Speaker 3: before she realized that she only had one mom like 495 00:26:52,359 --> 00:26:54,399 Speaker 3: she had all these people, and I had to I 496 00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:57,320 Speaker 3: guess I had to really teach myself to know that 497 00:26:57,480 --> 00:27:00,080 Speaker 3: they were there to help and they weren't trying to 498 00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:02,840 Speaker 3: step on my toes. They were doing things because I couldn't. 499 00:27:04,000 --> 00:27:05,920 Speaker 3: It took a lot for me to realize that she 500 00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:08,879 Speaker 3: was lucky to have them, not unlucky to not have me, 501 00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:12,960 Speaker 3: If that makes sense, like it, Yeah, I had to 502 00:27:13,040 --> 00:27:16,800 Speaker 3: play a lot of mind games with myself. I guess 503 00:27:17,040 --> 00:27:20,639 Speaker 3: rephrasing things or flipping the switch and making sure that 504 00:27:20,720 --> 00:27:26,159 Speaker 3: I could really be grateful rather than absolutely hating on 505 00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:29,320 Speaker 3: these people that were doing everything for me, not against me. 506 00:27:30,119 --> 00:27:35,600 Speaker 2: Were you given a timeline, are you in your head 507 00:27:35,600 --> 00:27:37,400 Speaker 2: as well? Are you planning for worst case scenario? 508 00:27:38,200 --> 00:27:41,320 Speaker 3: So we were working twelve week blocks, myself and my 509 00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:44,960 Speaker 3: medical professionals. So once we got through each twelve week block, 510 00:27:45,040 --> 00:27:46,800 Speaker 3: that was another scan, and I guess that would tell 511 00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:49,800 Speaker 3: us what the next twelve weeks would look like. So 512 00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:52,960 Speaker 3: my first year of diagnosis was definitely in those twelve 513 00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:56,040 Speaker 3: week blocks, and maybe sometimes six weeks, depending on I 514 00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:59,639 Speaker 3: guess what stage we were at. But I never I 515 00:27:59,760 --> 00:28:02,399 Speaker 3: never thought that it would beat me. I never it 516 00:28:02,560 --> 00:28:04,760 Speaker 3: never consumed my mind at all at all. 517 00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:05,280 Speaker 2: Never. 518 00:28:05,400 --> 00:28:09,320 Speaker 3: I was never giving in to the disease. I was 519 00:28:09,359 --> 00:28:13,720 Speaker 3: always stronger than it. People would suggest like writing books 520 00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:18,600 Speaker 3: for Sophia for different milestones, or putting my voice into 521 00:28:18,640 --> 00:28:20,320 Speaker 3: a teddy Bear or all these things, but I did 522 00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:23,720 Speaker 3: none of that because I genuinely believed that I would 523 00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:26,240 Speaker 3: be there to see those milestones and I would be 524 00:28:26,280 --> 00:28:27,960 Speaker 3: able to tell her that I loved her. She didn't 525 00:28:27,960 --> 00:28:29,600 Speaker 3: need a Teddy Bear to tell her that she loved, 526 00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:33,399 Speaker 3: that she was loved. So yeah, I think by not 527 00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:36,160 Speaker 3: giving into these things, and like even like my life insurance, 528 00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:38,000 Speaker 3: they were like, yeah, you can have it, you're dying. 529 00:28:38,760 --> 00:28:41,080 Speaker 3: I was like, absolutely not. I need that for when 530 00:28:41,160 --> 00:28:43,760 Speaker 3: I do die. So but I believe that if I 531 00:28:43,840 --> 00:28:45,560 Speaker 3: took that, that would be like some sort of calm 532 00:28:45,680 --> 00:28:49,800 Speaker 3: or me accepting that I was dying. And I didn't. Yeah, 533 00:28:50,000 --> 00:28:52,640 Speaker 3: I didn't let my body believe that I was dying. 534 00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:54,880 Speaker 3: And I obviously I'm still here three years later. So 535 00:28:56,320 --> 00:28:57,680 Speaker 3: whatever I'm doing, I'm doing okay. 536 00:28:58,720 --> 00:29:02,480 Speaker 2: And the pross Is it painful? 537 00:29:03,320 --> 00:29:03,480 Speaker 3: Is it? 538 00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:07,680 Speaker 2: Is it shocking? Is there a physical change with yourself 539 00:29:08,640 --> 00:29:09,800 Speaker 2: during the period after? 540 00:29:10,680 --> 00:29:13,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, so I was really concerned about losing my hair. 541 00:29:13,560 --> 00:29:16,800 Speaker 3: I think any woman would be. But the chemotherapy that 542 00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:19,480 Speaker 3: I was on, I didn't lose my hair, so I 543 00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:21,600 Speaker 3: guess that was that's your main appearance as a woman, 544 00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:23,800 Speaker 3: especially when you have long I had long, blonde hair, 545 00:29:23,880 --> 00:29:25,920 Speaker 3: So this is not this is my regrowth because I 546 00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:30,320 Speaker 3: did end up losing my hair eventually, and then yeah, 547 00:29:30,400 --> 00:29:35,120 Speaker 3: so I looked like me, which also helped people treat 548 00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:39,120 Speaker 3: me like me and not like a patient, which allowed 549 00:29:39,160 --> 00:29:42,160 Speaker 3: me to act like me, which was really really helpful. 550 00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:44,760 Speaker 3: But I did. I lost a shit ton of weight. 551 00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:46,600 Speaker 3: I mean I had a stoma, so I had a 552 00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:51,760 Speaker 3: foreign object on my stomach. I didn't. I wasn't the 553 00:29:51,960 --> 00:29:54,920 Speaker 3: normal mum that she should have had. But I was 554 00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:58,240 Speaker 3: as good as I possibly could be. It was hard. 555 00:29:58,320 --> 00:30:01,240 Speaker 3: I was allergic to one of the brands of that chemotherapy, 556 00:30:01,320 --> 00:30:03,520 Speaker 3: which is why when I did relapse, I had to 557 00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:08,920 Speaker 3: change chemotherapy, which meant lost my hair. But yeah, it 558 00:30:09,080 --> 00:30:11,520 Speaker 3: was I was on my deathbed. I was getting anaphyletic 559 00:30:11,600 --> 00:30:14,480 Speaker 3: reactions every three weeks to this chemotherapy, so I was 560 00:30:14,600 --> 00:30:18,320 Speaker 3: I was essentially dying every three weeks just to get better. 561 00:30:27,480 --> 00:30:31,880 Speaker 2: It must take its toll on your body, on your headspace, 562 00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:35,560 Speaker 2: on the family, on you know, the people around you. 563 00:30:37,120 --> 00:30:42,720 Speaker 2: How who's been the obviously Jeremy, I assume has been 564 00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:45,360 Speaker 2: a rock for you, But how important it is to 565 00:30:45,480 --> 00:30:48,080 Speaker 2: have those positive people around you in order for you 566 00:30:48,920 --> 00:30:51,720 Speaker 2: to maintain your positive mindset. Because I love that you 567 00:30:51,840 --> 00:30:54,200 Speaker 2: went through that process of you know, I'm not going 568 00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:56,680 Speaker 2: to give up. I'm not going to plan for the worst. 569 00:30:56,720 --> 00:30:59,440 Speaker 2: I'm not going to tell myself that, you know, I'm 570 00:30:59,560 --> 00:31:02,360 Speaker 2: not going to be hear, how important is it to 571 00:31:02,400 --> 00:31:05,240 Speaker 2: have those people around you to support you. 572 00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:09,280 Speaker 3: Yeah, I got so lucky, so lucky with a little 573 00:31:09,320 --> 00:31:12,800 Speaker 3: community or village that I had around me. They really 574 00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:15,080 Speaker 3: allowed me to be me still, and they allowed me 575 00:31:15,200 --> 00:31:17,160 Speaker 3: to not just be this patient. Obviously they were there 576 00:31:17,160 --> 00:31:21,800 Speaker 3: for me when I needed that help, especially because chemotherapy 577 00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:25,240 Speaker 3: does it knocks you, but they also allowed me to 578 00:31:25,360 --> 00:31:28,320 Speaker 3: do as much as I possibly could, and they allowed 579 00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:31,640 Speaker 3: me to still be a human, which was so so 580 00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:35,680 Speaker 3: great and it helped me get through completely. My medical 581 00:31:35,720 --> 00:31:39,800 Speaker 3: team was just insane. They were so supportive, Like my 582 00:31:39,920 --> 00:31:42,640 Speaker 3: surgeon literally left his eighteenth his daughter's eighteenth birthday to 583 00:31:42,680 --> 00:31:44,040 Speaker 3: come and see me to make sure that I was 584 00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:47,760 Speaker 3: okay in hospital one night. Like the things that people did, 585 00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:50,960 Speaker 3: I don't didn't realize at the time how much I 586 00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:54,960 Speaker 3: needed it, But now looking back, it's incredible, and I 587 00:31:55,120 --> 00:31:57,160 Speaker 3: know how much this affects so many more people than 588 00:31:57,240 --> 00:32:00,840 Speaker 3: just the patient, which at the time, again, you're very 589 00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:02,880 Speaker 3: much selfish and just trying to get through it, and 590 00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:06,240 Speaker 3: you think everything's just being like only you're being affected. 591 00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:08,800 Speaker 3: But now, yeah, looking back, the amount of people that 592 00:32:08,920 --> 00:32:11,720 Speaker 3: lost their life that year, as well, is just crazy. 593 00:32:12,040 --> 00:32:15,880 Speaker 2: The treatment it's in blocks, and after three months is 594 00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:19,200 Speaker 2: that you just get given the h this isn't and 595 00:32:19,800 --> 00:32:23,240 Speaker 2: you relapse. That's when you start. That's when you go right, listen. 596 00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:25,560 Speaker 3: I had a major surgery and they said there was 597 00:32:25,600 --> 00:32:27,440 Speaker 3: no evidence of disease, and what did that look like? 598 00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:31,680 Speaker 3: Antior a lower ultra lower anterior resection. So they removed 599 00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:34,920 Speaker 3: my inner sphincter, my rectum, my sigmoid colon, and part 600 00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:39,440 Speaker 3: of my colon, so a whole chunk of my bower basically. Yeah, 601 00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:42,360 Speaker 3: so they removed that and then they said there's no 602 00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:44,480 Speaker 3: evidence of disease, which is obviously the words you want 603 00:32:44,520 --> 00:32:46,760 Speaker 3: to hear. I wish I got remission. I've never gotten that, 604 00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:51,280 Speaker 3: but yeah, and then only I had my stoma reversed 605 00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:53,560 Speaker 3: three months after that, and then in December that year, 606 00:32:53,680 --> 00:32:56,200 Speaker 3: So a few months later I was relapsed and it 607 00:32:56,320 --> 00:32:59,000 Speaker 3: was in my lung, it was in my pelverse, it 608 00:32:59,040 --> 00:33:01,600 Speaker 3: was in my stomach, it was everywhere. 609 00:33:01,560 --> 00:33:02,520 Speaker 2: And is it still there? 610 00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:06,960 Speaker 3: So I mopped out all up with chemotherapy and radiotherapy. 611 00:33:08,280 --> 00:33:10,360 Speaker 3: Was doing really well, was really stable. I've never been 612 00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:12,920 Speaker 3: no evidence of disease since then, but I've been really 613 00:33:13,000 --> 00:33:15,160 Speaker 3: stable and being able to live a life like an 614 00:33:15,240 --> 00:33:18,520 Speaker 3: actual life and not being on my deathbed each week 615 00:33:19,680 --> 00:33:22,800 Speaker 3: like my new oncologists has just managed to. I guess, 616 00:33:22,840 --> 00:33:25,480 Speaker 3: make sure quality of life is also met, knowing that 617 00:33:25,560 --> 00:33:27,240 Speaker 3: I'm going to be living with this for the rest. 618 00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:29,480 Speaker 2: Of my life likely and what does that look like 619 00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:30,560 Speaker 2: on a day to day basis. 620 00:33:31,440 --> 00:33:34,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, so after the initial relapse, I did a really 621 00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:39,320 Speaker 3: aggressive chemotherapy again and then just managed it twelve weekly 622 00:33:39,560 --> 00:33:42,400 Speaker 3: scans and blood tests every fourth three to four weeks 623 00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:45,240 Speaker 3: and making sure. I guess I'm one of the lucky 624 00:33:45,320 --> 00:33:49,360 Speaker 3: ones that my cancer is really responsive and my blood 625 00:33:49,800 --> 00:33:51,520 Speaker 3: will show if something's wrong, so we'll be able to 626 00:33:51,640 --> 00:33:55,840 Speaker 3: act on that. But yeah, now at the moment, I'm 627 00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:59,040 Speaker 3: back in chemotherapy, which I said I never would do again. 628 00:33:59,200 --> 00:34:03,360 Speaker 3: But it's just oral, just oral chemotherapy, so I'm able 629 00:34:03,440 --> 00:34:05,360 Speaker 3: to not be in the hospital, so I'm able to 630 00:34:05,400 --> 00:34:08,480 Speaker 3: be at home. I don't hear the beeping sound, so 631 00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:12,960 Speaker 3: I've got really bad PTSD from beeping sounds because one 632 00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:15,200 Speaker 3: of the ways you can do chemotherapy is with a 633 00:34:15,320 --> 00:34:17,720 Speaker 3: pump that hangs around your neck for forty eight hours. 634 00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:20,440 Speaker 3: So I can be home, not in the hospital. But 635 00:34:20,800 --> 00:34:22,680 Speaker 3: that gives me PTSD and it just sends me into 636 00:34:22,719 --> 00:34:25,279 Speaker 3: a spiral, and I get side effects that aren't even 637 00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:28,960 Speaker 3: from the chemotherapy that are presenting because I'm so traumatized 638 00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:34,000 Speaker 3: from having chemotherapy. Yes, so now I do two week 639 00:34:34,080 --> 00:34:36,920 Speaker 3: blocks of oral chemotherapy. I'm in a week off at 640 00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:38,719 Speaker 3: the moment, and then I'll start again on one day 641 00:34:38,760 --> 00:34:41,840 Speaker 3: and do another two weeks of that chemo for the 642 00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:43,400 Speaker 3: next six months. 643 00:34:43,800 --> 00:34:47,279 Speaker 2: And you you're on this because you've relapsed, Is that right? 644 00:34:48,840 --> 00:34:49,080 Speaker 3: Yeah? 645 00:34:51,239 --> 00:34:54,239 Speaker 2: And how what does that look like? The relapse is it? 646 00:34:54,520 --> 00:34:54,680 Speaker 3: Is it? 647 00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:59,759 Speaker 2: Is it an extension or is the chemo treating it? 648 00:35:01,040 --> 00:35:03,719 Speaker 2: And then it's coming back? What does that look like? 649 00:35:04,480 --> 00:35:06,719 Speaker 3: Yeah? So I stopped chemotherapy for a little bit. There 650 00:35:07,440 --> 00:35:10,719 Speaker 3: was looking at alternate stuff and doing different trials like 651 00:35:10,800 --> 00:35:15,600 Speaker 3: clinical trials and stuff. But I got pneumonia not long ago, 652 00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:19,080 Speaker 3: forget all the time, but it just wouldn't go away. 653 00:35:19,160 --> 00:35:21,040 Speaker 3: So I went I had a scan and it was 654 00:35:21,600 --> 00:35:23,839 Speaker 3: the three I've got three mets, or had three mets 655 00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:26,719 Speaker 3: in my lung and they had grown by a really 656 00:35:26,800 --> 00:35:30,200 Speaker 3: really small margin. But any growth in my cancer is 657 00:35:30,440 --> 00:35:34,560 Speaker 3: quite aggressive and needs to I guess be addressed straight 658 00:35:34,600 --> 00:35:39,240 Speaker 3: away because it's not the original tumor, so's it grows 659 00:35:39,280 --> 00:35:41,200 Speaker 3: really really quickly, and we don't want it to obviously 660 00:35:41,280 --> 00:35:43,759 Speaker 3: spread from the lung where it is. That's the only 661 00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:47,480 Speaker 3: place that is now. So now I'm doing chemotherapy until December, 662 00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:50,239 Speaker 3: so then I can have a surgery to remove what's left. 663 00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:54,200 Speaker 2: And again, if I know this probably a tough question, Kelly, 664 00:35:54,400 --> 00:35:57,880 Speaker 2: and you know, again excuse me ignorance, but if you 665 00:35:58,000 --> 00:36:03,920 Speaker 2: didn't go back on chemo, what would that look like 666 00:36:04,080 --> 00:36:07,480 Speaker 2: as in time wise, because you said it's aggressive, would 667 00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:10,040 Speaker 2: it be would it be months? Would it be years? 668 00:36:10,920 --> 00:36:15,120 Speaker 3: My original relapse, they gave me my option was palliative care, 669 00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:19,680 Speaker 3: which is about three months, and that was two years 670 00:36:19,719 --> 00:36:20,239 Speaker 3: ago nearly. 671 00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:22,680 Speaker 2: How do you cope with that in your head? Do 672 00:36:22,719 --> 00:36:24,640 Speaker 2: you just block that out and you just focus on 673 00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:27,000 Speaker 2: what needs to be done? You just take it day 674 00:36:27,040 --> 00:36:30,920 Speaker 2: by day, you know, treatment by treatment? How do you 675 00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:32,120 Speaker 2: run your life in your head? 676 00:36:32,960 --> 00:36:34,680 Speaker 3: Yeah? Well, I try not to take it day by 677 00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:36,840 Speaker 3: day only because I don't want my life to be 678 00:36:36,920 --> 00:36:39,120 Speaker 3: defined by the disease. Like I know that it's a 679 00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:41,440 Speaker 3: huge portion of who I am, and I have to 680 00:36:41,520 --> 00:36:43,279 Speaker 3: be near my doctors I need to be close to 681 00:36:43,320 --> 00:36:45,520 Speaker 3: a hospital whatever it may be. But I also want 682 00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:51,640 Speaker 3: I really like pride myself in thriving with cancer. I 683 00:36:52,320 --> 00:36:55,200 Speaker 3: do everything that I possibly can. I'm still working, I'm 684 00:36:55,280 --> 00:36:59,480 Speaker 3: still advocating for this disease that i'm quite literally being 685 00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:04,320 Speaker 3: treated for. I am still parenting really quite well. I'm 686 00:37:04,440 --> 00:37:06,960 Speaker 3: doing all the things that a normal parent would do 687 00:37:07,520 --> 00:37:09,360 Speaker 3: for the most part. And I feel like if I 688 00:37:09,440 --> 00:37:13,480 Speaker 3: lived each day or day by day, then I'm doing 689 00:37:13,560 --> 00:37:17,480 Speaker 3: it a disservice, like I'm not. I really, I guess 690 00:37:17,680 --> 00:37:21,280 Speaker 3: want to make sure that I'm alive for a reason, 691 00:37:21,400 --> 00:37:24,200 Speaker 3: like I don't want. If I'm alive, I might as 692 00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:25,920 Speaker 3: well live. I'm living on borrowed time. I need to 693 00:37:25,960 --> 00:37:26,600 Speaker 3: make the most of it. 694 00:37:27,440 --> 00:37:31,120 Speaker 2: Early detection. What are the signs and symptoms of early 695 00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:32,280 Speaker 2: detection of bow cancer? 696 00:37:33,120 --> 00:37:35,640 Speaker 3: Yeah, so obviously, bloody Napoo's a big red flag and 697 00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:39,719 Speaker 3: not one that should be passed on ever, even some 698 00:37:39,920 --> 00:37:42,080 Speaker 3: new toilet paper. Just go get it checked out. It 699 00:37:42,160 --> 00:37:44,480 Speaker 3: doesn't mean it's going to be cancer. But blood is 700 00:37:44,480 --> 00:37:46,080 Speaker 3: a red flag. It's red for a reason. 701 00:37:46,239 --> 00:37:46,439 Speaker 2: Yeah. 702 00:37:47,640 --> 00:37:50,760 Speaker 3: But then also, like abdominal pains, change in bower habits 703 00:37:50,880 --> 00:37:54,880 Speaker 3: that last more than two weeks, unexplained weight loss, unexplained tiredness. 704 00:37:55,640 --> 00:37:58,480 Speaker 3: If any of these happen, which they can happen so easily, 705 00:37:58,600 --> 00:38:01,560 Speaker 3: but they if they last I get persist, that's probably 706 00:38:01,640 --> 00:38:03,920 Speaker 3: where you need to look into it more. If it's 707 00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:05,839 Speaker 3: persisting more than that two weeks. 708 00:38:06,000 --> 00:38:09,960 Speaker 2: And you've you've taken to social media to to to 709 00:38:10,040 --> 00:38:13,640 Speaker 2: give back uptimately to help raise awareness for this. How's 710 00:38:13,719 --> 00:38:15,520 Speaker 2: your social media campaign going? 711 00:38:16,040 --> 00:38:19,560 Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, No. The feedback that I get is just incredible, 712 00:38:19,640 --> 00:38:21,480 Speaker 3: Like the amount of lives I save, And that sounds 713 00:38:21,520 --> 00:38:24,160 Speaker 3: so cocky, but the amount of lives that I've saved 714 00:38:24,239 --> 00:38:28,320 Speaker 3: through simply talking about my own life is just incredible. 715 00:38:28,560 --> 00:38:30,400 Speaker 3: Like the amount of people that I've gone to get 716 00:38:30,440 --> 00:38:33,399 Speaker 3: a colonoscopy found poll ups being diagnosed at stage one. 717 00:38:33,800 --> 00:38:37,279 Speaker 3: One of my daughter's dance friends parents literally went and 718 00:38:37,360 --> 00:38:39,600 Speaker 3: got checked and she has stage three bal cancer. Like 719 00:38:39,680 --> 00:38:44,759 Speaker 3: the fact that me just talking is saving lives or 720 00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:48,040 Speaker 3: making people I guess second guess whether they're being taken 721 00:38:48,120 --> 00:38:52,280 Speaker 3: seriously or pushing and advocating for themselves saving their own lives. 722 00:38:52,400 --> 00:38:55,520 Speaker 3: It's just it really is so incredible. Like it took 723 00:38:55,560 --> 00:38:57,759 Speaker 3: me a really long time to realize I guess the 724 00:38:57,800 --> 00:39:00,440 Speaker 3: impact that I'm able to have, but soon I did. 725 00:39:00,480 --> 00:39:03,920 Speaker 3: I've just gone full throttle and doing as much as 726 00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:07,200 Speaker 3: I possibly can while also trying to like nurture and 727 00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:08,359 Speaker 3: save my own life. 728 00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:12,719 Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly focus on yourself or that's very selfish of you. 729 00:39:14,160 --> 00:39:15,440 Speaker 2: And what does a check up look like? 730 00:39:16,080 --> 00:39:18,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, well, I guess it's different for everyone, but your 731 00:39:18,760 --> 00:39:20,600 Speaker 3: GPS there for a reason. And I know it can 732 00:39:20,680 --> 00:39:23,080 Speaker 3: be really intimidating to go see a doctor, especially when 733 00:39:23,120 --> 00:39:28,880 Speaker 3: they are symptoms of being a female generally. But they 734 00:39:29,040 --> 00:39:32,640 Speaker 3: talk about shit every day like that. That's the uncomfortable 735 00:39:32,719 --> 00:39:37,560 Speaker 3: part about this disease. But it doesn't discriminate either, which 736 00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:39,840 Speaker 3: is really frustrating because it doesn't care if you're a 737 00:39:40,040 --> 00:39:42,640 Speaker 3: young twenty five year old woman that doesn't want to 738 00:39:42,640 --> 00:39:47,040 Speaker 3: talk about whoo, he doesn't care. But yeah, I guess 739 00:39:47,040 --> 00:39:50,319 Speaker 3: seeing a GPS the easiest part. But then the colonoscopy 740 00:39:51,560 --> 00:39:53,920 Speaker 3: is where you usually get put after that, and that 741 00:39:54,239 --> 00:39:56,840 Speaker 3: is their prep is shocking. But then you have a 742 00:39:56,960 --> 00:39:59,000 Speaker 3: nice little sleep and wake up to sandwiches like it's 743 00:39:59,120 --> 00:40:02,439 Speaker 3: really is a really easy procedure to be having. 744 00:40:03,200 --> 00:40:06,759 Speaker 2: And where where are you at right now in your life? 745 00:40:06,800 --> 00:40:10,960 Speaker 2: Where's your your mindset, where's your vision? Where's Kelly at 746 00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:11,399 Speaker 2: right now? 747 00:40:12,320 --> 00:40:14,759 Speaker 3: Yeah, well, just getting through another about of treatment at 748 00:40:14,760 --> 00:40:17,800 Speaker 3: the moment. But my daughter actually turned three today, so 749 00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:20,279 Speaker 3: that's a huge milestone that we've been able to hear. 750 00:40:20,400 --> 00:40:23,440 Speaker 2: Wow, congratulations birthday, little one. 751 00:40:23,640 --> 00:40:27,520 Speaker 3: And started Kindy and started KINDI, which means that's something 752 00:40:27,560 --> 00:40:30,600 Speaker 3: called my bucket list that I never thought i'd be 753 00:40:30,719 --> 00:40:32,880 Speaker 3: well when I was diagnosed, didn't think i'd be here 754 00:40:32,920 --> 00:40:34,719 Speaker 3: to see and I got taken to a first day 755 00:40:34,719 --> 00:40:35,719 Speaker 3: of KINDI, which was humane. 756 00:40:35,760 --> 00:40:38,040 Speaker 2: I love that you've got the positive mindset like that. 757 00:40:38,320 --> 00:40:39,840 Speaker 2: That's phenomenal. I love that. 758 00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:43,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, now it's just trying to live life as normal 759 00:40:43,560 --> 00:40:47,800 Speaker 3: as possible, like still planning holidays, still booking weddings and 760 00:40:48,120 --> 00:40:50,400 Speaker 3: all those things that I still want to see my 761 00:40:50,440 --> 00:40:52,920 Speaker 3: friends do good and like, yeah, just trying to live 762 00:40:52,960 --> 00:40:56,480 Speaker 3: as normal as possible while also knowing that my life's 763 00:40:56,560 --> 00:40:57,280 Speaker 3: really not normal. 764 00:40:58,800 --> 00:41:02,000 Speaker 2: Kelly, Thank you ever so much for sharing your story. 765 00:41:02,680 --> 00:41:04,960 Speaker 2: Your mindset is phenomenal. I love the way that you 766 00:41:05,120 --> 00:41:09,600 Speaker 2: have this positive outlooking life and cracking on the way 767 00:41:09,640 --> 00:41:13,640 Speaker 2: you do it is hugely inspirational. And this podcast alone 768 00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:18,160 Speaker 2: will continue to save lives. So Thank you so much, Kelly, 769 00:41:18,719 --> 00:41:21,680 Speaker 2: Thank you so much for having me on. Kelly is 770 00:41:21,719 --> 00:41:25,319 Speaker 2: an ambassador for the Jodie Lee Foundation. To find out 771 00:41:25,360 --> 00:41:28,920 Speaker 2: more about bow cancer screening and early detection, head to 772 00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:33,640 Speaker 2: Trust your Gut dot org dot au. Thank you so 773 00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:37,320 Speaker 2: much for joining me on Headgame. If you enjoyed this episode, 774 00:41:37,440 --> 00:41:40,239 Speaker 2: make sure you're subscribed so you don't miss any of 775 00:41:40,280 --> 00:41:44,240 Speaker 2: our incredible stories and leave me a review wherever you're listening, 776 00:41:45,239 --> 00:41:48,000 Speaker 2: I'm Att Middleton. Catch you again next time.