WEBVTT - Moisturiser UpDATE 😂

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<v Speaker 1>Hi, friends. Hi, friends. It is Mal and Monty. This

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<v Speaker 1>is your show and tell podcast. Thanks for listening.

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<v Speaker 2>Hi.

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<v Speaker 1>Hi. You started talking and I'm like, just press record.

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<v Speaker 1>Why do you sometimes talk and tell me about things

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<v Speaker 1>when people want to hear? But so you watched an

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<v Speaker 1>interview with Sylvester Stallone.

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<v Speaker 2>Sylvester Stallone is not someone that I would ordinarily think about. No.

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<v Speaker 2>Although Rocky IV and Rocky III were probably in my,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, most watched movies as a kid. Really? I

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<v Speaker 2>fucking loved them. Yeah, I really loved them. Anyway, he recently,

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<v Speaker 2>but a few weeks ago, a month ago maybe, did

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<v Speaker 2>an interview with the New York Times. Their series of

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<v Speaker 2>interviews are so good. Really?

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't even know they did any. Where do you

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<v Speaker 1>see them?

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<v Speaker 2>It's so good. So you can watch them on YouTube

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<v Speaker 2>and they put clips up on Insta all the time. Okay.

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<v Speaker 2>But I sat down and watched the whole interview. It

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<v Speaker 2>was fucking fascinating, brilliant, the best interview I have ever seen.

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<v Speaker 2>Big call. He is 80. Is he 80? It's my

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<v Speaker 2>dad's age. Oh, my God. He was so unbelievably candid

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<v Speaker 2>and I think this is my favourite thing, when people

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<v Speaker 2>take accountability for their mistakes. Yes, yeah. He is not

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<v Speaker 2>someone who, you know, like, an Aussie person who is

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<v Speaker 2>currently in jail for DV charges at the moment, like

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<v Speaker 2>there are excuses. When someone takes accountability and says, I

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<v Speaker 2>fucked up. Yes. It's so much more palatable, right?

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<v Speaker 1>Yes.

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<v Speaker 2>And you respect them more. It's really interesting how sometimes

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<v Speaker 2>the thing you think is the worst thing that can

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<v Speaker 2>happen ends up being like something that becomes special about you.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, right.

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<v Speaker 2>Like he was talking about his mum. when he was delivered,

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<v Speaker 2>he was, it was a forceps delivery. His mum was

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<v Speaker 2>like a real piece of shit, but it was a

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<v Speaker 2>forceps delivery and they did damage to the nerve in

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<v Speaker 2>his mouth, which is why he has the mouth thing.

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<v Speaker 2>But it's funny because you think that's what people know Silvester,

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<v Speaker 2>like that's his sort of thing. But he had a

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<v Speaker 2>really horrible childhood, like very disconnected, unemotional parents who gave

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<v Speaker 2>him no love. And there was this one thing that

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<v Speaker 2>he said that I found so sad. He said his dad,

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<v Speaker 2>his mum just when he was 11 walked out and decided,

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<v Speaker 2>I don't want to be a mum anymore. And he

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<v Speaker 2>said he remembers that sort of primal getting on the

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<v Speaker 2>ground and holding onto her leg and saying, but don't go.

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<v Speaker 2>And she's just kicking him off. Like, how could you?

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know. Anyway, he was with his dad and

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<v Speaker 2>his dad was a polo player, but he would never

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<v Speaker 2>let him ride the horses he would just make him

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<v Speaker 2>clean the stables and stuff and he said and I

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<v Speaker 2>remember this one night we were driving home he said

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<v Speaker 2>I was in the front passenger seat he said and

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<v Speaker 2>I started to sort of like doze off and fall

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<v Speaker 2>asleep he said and my dad put my head sort

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<v Speaker 2>of on his lap he said and I just remember

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<v Speaker 2>he just stroked my hair like stroked my head he

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<v Speaker 2>said and in that moment I thought oh this must

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<v Speaker 2>be what it feels like to have comfort he said

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<v Speaker 2>it was the first last only time that has ever happened.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my God. Wow.

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<v Speaker 2>And he said like, he didn't even, he's had, I

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<v Speaker 2>think five kids. He said, he doesn't think he really

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<v Speaker 2>understood what true love was until he was about 70.

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<v Speaker 2>He said, I've had kids and stuff. He said, but

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<v Speaker 2>like for me, the real world was working and being

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<v Speaker 2>on a movie set or whatever. He said at home

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<v Speaker 2>with my family was the surreal world. Oh. He said,

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<v Speaker 2>people will say I have no regrets. Oh, well, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>life has worked out. I have no regrets. He said,

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<v Speaker 2>I have a mountain of regrets.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, wow.

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<v Speaker 2>Of things I've done or didn't do. And I'm just like,

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<v Speaker 2>I fucking rate you, Sylvester Stallone.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, okay. I'll watch that then.

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<v Speaker 2>It's so good. New York Times. Yeah, it's so good.

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<v Speaker 1>Wow. There's also another doco, the Oasis doco, that came

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<v Speaker 1>out a few weeks ago as well. Why are you laughing?

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<v Speaker 2>Did you watch it?

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<v Speaker 1>I haven't, but Sam watched it and he's gagging to

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<v Speaker 1>get me to watch it. He's like, I'll watch it

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<v Speaker 1>again with you. Come on. But he just found it

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<v Speaker 1>so amazing because he said that like when they walked

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<v Speaker 1>into the first rehearsal, Liam and Noel, like Liam doesn't

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<v Speaker 1>say anything, just sings and walks out and then the

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<v Speaker 1>whole thing is kind of about them coming back together

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<v Speaker 1>and he just found it all about, he just saw

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<v Speaker 1>a message in there that clearly your smirk on your

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<v Speaker 1>face is very different than what you found.

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<v Speaker 2>No, no, no. I've got like a personal, well not personal,

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<v Speaker 2>but I don't like, I like their music. Yes. I

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<v Speaker 2>don't like them. because they were so nasty and they

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<v Speaker 2>were so mean to Michael Hutchence. It really upset me. Oh,

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<v Speaker 2>were they? They were just, it was such a dumb thing,

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<v Speaker 2>but it was horrible. It wasn't long before he ended

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<v Speaker 2>up taking his life or whatever happened. But they said

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<v Speaker 2>it was like some award that In Excess were presenting

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<v Speaker 2>to them, like best newcomer or something. And they got

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<v Speaker 2>up and they were fucking off their faces and they go,

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<v Speaker 2>Has-beens shouldn't be presenting awards to Benavides or whatever. And

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<v Speaker 2>I was just like, fuck you, dickheads. But I have

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<v Speaker 2>a conspiracy theory about Oasis. What? Mark goes to me,

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<v Speaker 2>you're fucking, this is the dumbest thing you've ever said.

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<v Speaker 2>But it is sort of brilliant, I reckon. Is there

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<v Speaker 2>anything more perfect than the idea of them being at

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<v Speaker 2>the height of their fame, everybody loved Oasis, and then

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<v Speaker 2>this big fallout that everyone's going to relate to, a

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<v Speaker 2>sibling fallout. That maybe, maybe it was part of a plan.

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<v Speaker 2>Imagine they just, they wanted to step away, but they

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<v Speaker 2>didn't want to say we're stopping. So they wanted to

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<v Speaker 2>leave the window open for if we want to come back.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like.

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<v Speaker 2>What do people love more than a family reunion? Nothing.

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<v Speaker 2>Everyone loves it.

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<v Speaker 1>The reunion has been like 20 years later. I think

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<v Speaker 1>that there was a legit fallout there.

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<v Speaker 2>Maybe they're ready. They're ready now. They're ready to get

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<v Speaker 2>back into the spotlight and they knew and that's exactly

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<v Speaker 2>what's happened too. It's like the perfect story. Even let's

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<v Speaker 2>assume my conspiracy theory isn't true.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, yes.

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<v Speaker 2>But it is the perfect story because everyone relates to

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<v Speaker 2>the family conflict.

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<v Speaker 1>All we want is a happy ending. All we ever

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<v Speaker 1>want in life is a happy ending and in that

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<v Speaker 1>doco is like about forgiveness and love and stuff like that.

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<v Speaker 1>But I said to Sam, for them to still be not,

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<v Speaker 1>for them to still have been in a fallout when

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<v Speaker 1>they decided to tour, the money that was thrown at

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<v Speaker 1>them must have been so huge that they just could not.

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<v Speaker 1>It would have to have been so ludicrous that for

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<v Speaker 1>all of them to go, yeah, all right, we'll do this.

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<v Speaker 2>Are they doing new music or they're just.

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<v Speaker 1>I think they would– no, I think– no, because they

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<v Speaker 1>hadn't been in a studio together, had they? Like I

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<v Speaker 1>think it was all old stuff.

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<v Speaker 2>I think it was just– Yeah, I just– yeah, I

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<v Speaker 2>wonder if they're going to do that because I'm like,

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<v Speaker 2>should they release new music?

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<v Speaker 1>No, no one's doing music anymore with bands like that.

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<v Speaker 1>It's the same as Powderfinger touring. Just play the classics, mate.

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<v Speaker 1>Like I love Powderfinger. I don't love them enough to go.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't love anyone enough to go to a concert.

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<v Speaker 2>I've said it before.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think I'll ever go to a concert again.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think– I'll never go to a concert again.

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<v Speaker 2>I know.

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<v Speaker 1>Isn't that– I know for some people that's quite sad.

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<v Speaker 1>For me, I'm like I don't like crowds. I don't

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<v Speaker 1>like loud music. I don't want to stand. Like Powderfinger

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<v Speaker 1>is going to be like a festival set up and

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<v Speaker 1>so I don't want to go and I don't want to–

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<v Speaker 1>but I'm like it would be pretty amazing. If I

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<v Speaker 1>was to go to any concert, it would be Powderfinger. Really?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I like Powderfinger. See, I would have said if

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<v Speaker 2>you could go to any concert, you would have gone

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<v Speaker 2>to Kylie Minogue. That's what I would think.

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<v Speaker 1>No, I've been to a couple of Kylie concerts, so

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<v Speaker 1>I don't need to do that again. I've seen who

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<v Speaker 1>I want to see.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I know.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry.

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<v Speaker 2>Your concerts are like my travel.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, they'll never happen again. My God, how's the two

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<v Speaker 1>of us together? How's our fucking quirks?

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<v Speaker 2>We're so fucked. We're so social. We're so healthy.

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<v Speaker 1>Just really pillars of health in every which way. Tell

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<v Speaker 1>you what I saw this morning, though, which made me

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<v Speaker 1>seriously like my vagina become a clam.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, God.

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<v Speaker 1>There was a guy on a scooter, a grown man

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<v Speaker 1>on a scooter with a backpack. And it wasn't his

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<v Speaker 1>kid's backpack. It was clearly his backpack. And he was scooting.

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<v Speaker 1>And I thought, no, mate, you can't be on that scooter. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Because you know what? It wasn't even electric, which doesn't

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<v Speaker 1>make it any better. But it wasn't electric.

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<v Speaker 2>I think that makes it better.

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<v Speaker 1>It makes it a bit better because it makes– yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I agree.

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<v Speaker 2>He's actually doing something. Yes.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, you think it's better that he's on the normal

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<v Speaker 1>scooter or not?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, a normal scooter.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, so he's exercising. You like the exercise factor.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, not even exercising, just that you're actually doing something.

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<v Speaker 2>You're not just like– Standing there. Yeah, but just so

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<v Speaker 2>his leg just going vroom, vroom, vroom, a grown man.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, oh.

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<v Speaker 2>It's weird, but he'd be happier than us because he's

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<v Speaker 2>doing what he wants to do.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Is he?

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<v Speaker 1>I think he'd want to be in a car or

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<v Speaker 1>something or maybe on an electric bike.

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<v Speaker 2>Electric bike? Doesn't Sam ride like he actually rides a bicycle?

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<v Speaker 1>No, Sam used to ride, do like road bikes, like

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<v Speaker 1>where the Lycra and stuff like that when we lived

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<v Speaker 1>in Melbourne.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, the Lycra and everything.

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<v Speaker 1>He went through a huge stage of it, yes. And

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<v Speaker 1>that's a big activity. That's like having somebody golf. That's

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<v Speaker 1>like hours and hours they go for.

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<v Speaker 2>But it's like saying, oh, why would you walk somewhere

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<v Speaker 2>when you can drive? Yeah. You know what I mean?

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<v Speaker 1>That's a legit question to me.

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<v Speaker 2>You know what I did think about driving the other day?

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<v Speaker 2>I said to the kids and they actually didn't know

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<v Speaker 2>what the fuck I was talking about. I'm like, this

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<v Speaker 2>is the sign of the times. I said, I think

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<v Speaker 2>the next car I get, I want it to be manual.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh yeah. So you feel like you're driving. I miss it.

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<v Speaker 1>Our babysitter's got a manual car. So occasionally I've driven

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<v Speaker 1>her car when she's needed mine and it's, It's not

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<v Speaker 1>as fun as you think. It's a bit annoying. Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>you do feel like you're actually driving, but it's definitely

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<v Speaker 1>used to be better than it is now. Like now

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<v Speaker 1>you're like, oh, why would I be doing this if

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<v Speaker 1>I don't have to? I know you think it. It's

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<v Speaker 1>more romanticised in your mind than the actual reality of it.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know. God, I was good though. I was driving, smoking,

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<v Speaker 2>manual at the same time. Such a multitasker.

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<v Speaker 1>It's so funny eating fries with them in your lap,

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<v Speaker 1>doing the clutch. How funny. How's this? The other day

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<v Speaker 1>Sam goes, we're sitting on the couch, the kids are

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<v Speaker 1>in bed, he goes, tell me something that you do

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<v Speaker 1>that's weird that I wouldn't know. And we've been together

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<v Speaker 1>for like 23 years. So there's nothing that I feel

0:11:03.350 --> 0:11:05.929
<v Speaker 1>we don't know about each other. So we're sitting there

0:11:05.950 --> 0:11:08.750
<v Speaker 1>and I'm like, yeah, it was a good question. I said,

0:11:09.350 --> 0:11:12.880
<v Speaker 1>Oh gee, I don't know. I said, sometimes when I

0:11:12.920 --> 0:11:14.960
<v Speaker 1>lay in bed and my pubes along, I twist my

0:11:15.000 --> 0:11:18.870
<v Speaker 1>pubes around and he's like, Oh, what? Like, So you

0:11:18.900 --> 0:11:20.330
<v Speaker 1>just lay there and twist and then do you get

0:11:20.370 --> 0:11:22.950
<v Speaker 1>up and wash your hands? I'm like, not really, no.

0:11:23.030 --> 0:11:25.010
<v Speaker 2>Like you make dreadlocks with them or something?

0:11:25.050 --> 0:11:27.270
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, like a dreddy. And I said it doesn't happen

0:11:27.330 --> 0:11:30.790
<v Speaker 1>often because they're not usually hugely long, but sometimes when

0:11:30.809 --> 0:11:32.510
<v Speaker 1>they are long it's like a comfort where I'll just

0:11:32.570 --> 0:11:34.949
<v Speaker 1>lay there and twist them almost like a binky.

0:11:34.970 --> 0:11:40.480
<v Speaker 2>I am really, this is one of the things that

0:11:40.679 --> 0:11:42.280
<v Speaker 2>I truly love about you.

0:11:44.460 --> 0:11:47.300
<v Speaker 1>This is not going on Instagram, by the way.

0:11:47.360 --> 0:11:49.040
<v Speaker 2>I know just in your head you're like, this is

0:11:49.080 --> 0:11:51.120
<v Speaker 2>for Instagram. No, it's not. That is the clip of

0:11:51.860 --> 0:11:52.160
<v Speaker 2>the week.

0:11:52.780 --> 0:11:56.140
<v Speaker 1>No. Anyway, and he's like, oh, that's gross. Then would

0:11:56.160 --> 0:11:57.720
<v Speaker 1>you go and make pin stuff? I'm like, don't go

0:11:57.780 --> 0:12:00.080
<v Speaker 1>into the logistics of it. You asked me what something

0:12:00.160 --> 0:12:02.840
<v Speaker 1>weird I did. I said, sometimes I do that and

0:12:02.860 --> 0:12:03.280
<v Speaker 1>I get.

0:12:03.140 --> 0:12:03.880
<v Speaker 2>That that is weird.

0:12:03.940 --> 0:12:06.300
<v Speaker 1>That is not something I would tell everyone that is,

0:12:06.400 --> 0:12:07.540
<v Speaker 1>which clearly now I have.

0:12:07.570 --> 0:12:08.620
<v Speaker 2>I would just say it on the podcast.

0:12:09.240 --> 0:12:11.559
<v Speaker 1>I'll just say it on the podcast. Anyway, then I

0:12:11.600 --> 0:12:14.080
<v Speaker 1>was expecting him to come back with something like that.

0:12:14.440 --> 0:12:17.500
<v Speaker 2>Oh no, he trapped you. He said something fucking stupid.

0:12:18.520 --> 0:12:21.090
<v Speaker 1>I said to him, what about you? And he had

0:12:21.130 --> 0:12:24.170
<v Speaker 1>two things. The first thing he goes is when I

0:12:24.190 --> 0:12:28.950
<v Speaker 1>brush my teeth, I rotate feet for balance. So to

0:12:28.990 --> 0:12:31.170
<v Speaker 1>just keep my balance. So like I'll stand, I'll clean

0:12:31.190 --> 0:12:33.380
<v Speaker 1>my teeth and I'll stand on one foot And then

0:12:33.410 --> 0:12:35.760
<v Speaker 1>I'll swap to the other. I'm like, oh, my God.

0:12:35.780 --> 0:12:37.680
<v Speaker 2>Why is he standing on one foot while he's brushing

0:12:37.740 --> 0:12:38.300
<v Speaker 2>his teeth?

0:12:38.559 --> 0:12:41.900
<v Speaker 1>Because for balance, because he's getting older, he's like to

0:12:41.960 --> 0:12:46.340
<v Speaker 1>keep my like core active and stuff like that. So

0:12:46.360 --> 0:12:47.860
<v Speaker 1>he goes from one foot to another.

0:12:47.880 --> 0:12:49.800
<v Speaker 2>I'll write that down because that's a good idea.

0:12:49.820 --> 0:12:52.640
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's a good idea. So I twist my pubes

0:12:52.700 --> 0:12:54.220
<v Speaker 1>and he goes from one foot to another. And then

0:12:54.240 --> 0:12:58.679
<v Speaker 1>he goes, this is something else I do. Now, this

0:12:58.740 --> 0:13:01.110
<v Speaker 1>is when I was like, we are very different humans.

0:13:01.250 --> 0:13:03.910
<v Speaker 1>He said- He used to listen to this guy called

0:13:03.970 --> 0:13:08.080
<v Speaker 1>Sam Harris, who's a bit of a motivational kind of guru.

0:13:08.120 --> 0:13:11.040
<v Speaker 1>And he said, sometimes when I'm laying in bed, he said,

0:13:11.080 --> 0:13:13.380
<v Speaker 1>I'll think of somebody. And it could be just somebody

0:13:13.420 --> 0:13:16.620
<v Speaker 1>that I bumped into the shops that day. And he said,

0:13:16.720 --> 0:13:20.420
<v Speaker 1>and then I send them a bucket load of love.

0:13:20.940 --> 0:13:24.260
<v Speaker 1>Like I just think of them and I send them

0:13:25.100 --> 0:13:28.040
<v Speaker 1>all this love and I wish them really well. And

0:13:28.059 --> 0:13:31.260
<v Speaker 1>he said, I do it because it makes me feel good.

0:13:32.330 --> 0:13:37.000
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, oh, my God, these weird things that we

0:13:37.010 --> 0:13:39.160
<v Speaker 1>do are very different.

0:13:39.900 --> 0:13:44.599
<v Speaker 2>That is number one. I mean, if Sam Kavanagh could

0:13:44.620 --> 0:13:47.439
<v Speaker 2>not have been the nicest person on the planet, he's

0:13:47.460 --> 0:13:51.320
<v Speaker 2>just somehow upped himself. I mean, what a lovely thing

0:13:51.380 --> 0:13:53.770
<v Speaker 2>to do because I personally do the opposite.

0:13:54.390 --> 0:13:56.270
<v Speaker 1>Yes. I told my friend Kez and she said, I

0:13:56.470 --> 0:13:58.050
<v Speaker 1>wonder if you can do it with all your hate

0:13:58.090 --> 0:14:00.510
<v Speaker 1>for somebody, like just sit there and go, this person–

0:14:00.530 --> 0:14:03.010
<v Speaker 1>I said– I don't think that's the point of it.

0:14:03.410 --> 0:14:05.380
<v Speaker 1>But Sam was trying to justify that he does it

0:14:05.420 --> 0:14:06.920
<v Speaker 1>because it makes him feel good. He goes, it makes

0:14:06.940 --> 0:14:09.200
<v Speaker 1>you feel really good when you do something like that.

0:14:09.240 --> 0:14:11.400
<v Speaker 1>He said, it might be one of the boys, but

0:14:11.420 --> 0:14:14.099
<v Speaker 1>it could be just, and I just said a random friend,

0:14:14.140 --> 0:14:16.699
<v Speaker 1>I said, could you do it to Jimmy Jones? And

0:14:16.720 --> 0:14:19.239
<v Speaker 1>he goes, yeah, I could give some love to Jimmy too.

0:14:19.440 --> 0:14:20.340
<v Speaker 1>Could give it to anyone.

0:14:20.540 --> 0:14:22.280
<v Speaker 2>Can you ask him to do that for me?

0:14:22.300 --> 0:14:24.330
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Kez said that too. She said, can you please

0:14:24.350 --> 0:14:26.030
<v Speaker 1>get him to do it to me? Yeah, I'll say,

0:14:26.110 --> 0:14:29.450
<v Speaker 1>can you please love bomb Kez and Mel when you

0:14:29.490 --> 0:14:32.250
<v Speaker 1>do your next thing. But I was like, yeah, that

0:14:32.310 --> 0:14:35.530
<v Speaker 1>is weird. It's cringe, but I also love that he

0:14:35.580 --> 0:14:40.000
<v Speaker 1>does it. But I'm just like, wow, how different when

0:14:40.040 --> 0:14:42.280
<v Speaker 1>we went where our minds went to share what weird

0:14:42.320 --> 0:14:42.960
<v Speaker 1>things we do.

0:14:42.980 --> 0:14:46.320
<v Speaker 2>Well, I'm in your camp because I was thinking, what's

0:14:46.360 --> 0:14:49.000
<v Speaker 2>something weird that I do? What do you do? Well,

0:14:49.540 --> 0:14:51.800
<v Speaker 2>it's not even that weird, I guess, but I wipe

0:14:51.830 --> 0:14:53.110
<v Speaker 2>my bum every time I wee.

0:14:54.010 --> 0:14:56.830
<v Speaker 1>Oh, that's very, very weird. And I did not know that.

0:14:57.500 --> 0:14:59.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I just, I don't know. It's like I've just

0:14:59.640 --> 0:15:03.750
<v Speaker 2>got to. Your poor bum. Yeah, nah. I mean, I

0:15:03.750 --> 0:15:09.250
<v Speaker 2>don't aggressively go in there. Speaking of bums and shit

0:15:09.290 --> 0:15:11.210
<v Speaker 2>I get on my Instagram page and I say I

0:15:11.370 --> 0:15:14.970
<v Speaker 2>don't know why, but I know why. It's called an algorithm. Yes.

0:15:15.070 --> 0:15:20.460
<v Speaker 2>But I saw an interview with a proctologist, an asshole doctor.

0:15:20.930 --> 0:15:22.920
<v Speaker 1>Yes, interesting choice of career.

0:15:23.600 --> 0:15:26.190
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. I know. Like what would make you want to

0:15:26.210 --> 0:15:28.190
<v Speaker 2>do that? What do you want to be when you

0:15:28.210 --> 0:15:31.630
<v Speaker 2>grow up, Johnny? No. I think maybe you're just going

0:15:31.650 --> 0:15:35.770
<v Speaker 2>into that field because you're going, actually, the asshole is interesting. Yeah.

0:15:35.790 --> 0:15:41.150
<v Speaker 2>Because everything's interesting. But he was talking about how like,

0:15:41.200 --> 0:15:43.760
<v Speaker 2>you know, aggressively wiping your ass is not a good thing.

0:15:43.840 --> 0:15:46.440
<v Speaker 2>It's the tissue there is so delicate. It's like the

0:15:46.480 --> 0:15:49.080
<v Speaker 2>same tissue as on your lips, on your face. What?

0:15:50.560 --> 0:15:53.160
<v Speaker 2>But so he's talking about how you should be washing

0:15:53.200 --> 0:15:56.140
<v Speaker 2>yourself and cleaning yourself and whatever. He goes, make sure

0:15:56.160 --> 0:15:58.640
<v Speaker 2>you're completely dry, use a blow dryer if you need

0:15:58.680 --> 0:15:59.040
<v Speaker 2>or whatever.

0:15:59.070 --> 0:15:59.590
<v Speaker 1>Oh, Jesus.

0:15:59.670 --> 0:16:03.230
<v Speaker 2>He goes, moisturise it. And I thought. Moisturise it? I

0:16:03.250 --> 0:16:06.390
<v Speaker 2>don't know if this is something that I'm not clued into.

0:16:07.550 --> 0:16:10.170
<v Speaker 2>I've never moisturised my arsehole before. Oh, my God.

0:16:11.220 --> 0:16:15.080
<v Speaker 1>I have never and will never moisturise my arsehole. What

0:16:15.100 --> 0:16:17.100
<v Speaker 1>would you use too, just like Nivea?

0:16:17.120 --> 0:16:19.950
<v Speaker 2>You would have to use. I'm assuming it would have

0:16:19.970 --> 0:16:24.810
<v Speaker 2>to be something unscented, no like as plain as you could,

0:16:24.930 --> 0:16:27.229
<v Speaker 2>maybe like a sorbolene or something. I don't know. I'm

0:16:28.050 --> 0:16:31.370
<v Speaker 2>like imagine like, you know, we moisturise our bodies, you

0:16:31.390 --> 0:16:32.850
<v Speaker 2>get out of the shower, best time to do it

0:16:32.870 --> 0:16:33.790
<v Speaker 2>is when you're damp as well.

0:16:34.410 --> 0:16:37.320
<v Speaker 1>I've heard that. I heard that years and years and

0:16:37.360 --> 0:16:39.080
<v Speaker 1>years ago because it absorbs more.

0:16:39.120 --> 0:16:40.440
<v Speaker 2>Is that right? Yes, yes.

0:16:40.920 --> 0:16:41.360
<v Speaker 1>Oh, wow.

0:16:41.400 --> 0:16:45.680
<v Speaker 2>So, yeah, imagine you're just like, you know, you do

0:16:45.700 --> 0:16:48.850
<v Speaker 2>your face stuff, you get your body all moisturized and

0:16:48.890 --> 0:16:54.850
<v Speaker 2>you're like, one last spot. And just imagine the position

0:16:54.890 --> 0:16:55.770
<v Speaker 2>you get into to do it.

0:16:56.120 --> 0:17:00.880
<v Speaker 1>Oh, but then it'd feel all greasy and oily. That

0:17:00.960 --> 0:17:04.000
<v Speaker 1>is overkill to me. The proctologist has gone too far.

0:17:04.060 --> 0:17:07.540
<v Speaker 1>He's delved too far into his profession. And now that

0:17:07.560 --> 0:17:09.929
<v Speaker 1>we are, we are not getting to the point where

0:17:09.950 --> 0:17:12.650
<v Speaker 1>we're moisturizing dates. And here's the thing is I know you,

0:17:13.240 --> 0:17:15.919
<v Speaker 1>And out of anyone I know, you will do it. Yes.

0:17:15.940 --> 0:17:17.900
<v Speaker 2>I'm going to try it. I'll report back next week.

0:17:18.070 --> 0:17:20.310
<v Speaker 2>But I'm going to give it a week and see

0:17:20.350 --> 0:17:22.630
<v Speaker 2>if it feels any different. And also, I don't think you, like,

0:17:22.770 --> 0:17:25.510
<v Speaker 2>blob a heap on it. I think it's just a

0:17:25.530 --> 0:17:28.830
<v Speaker 2>little bit of TLC to an area that works really hard.

0:17:28.850 --> 0:17:30.050
<v Speaker 1>Oh, God.

0:17:30.070 --> 0:17:32.450
<v Speaker 2>The poor asshole's just forgotten, isn't it?

0:17:32.450 --> 0:17:36.640
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but it's just like, I mean, it's not on display.

0:17:36.740 --> 0:17:39.180
<v Speaker 1>It doesn't matter. That's even more reason.

0:17:39.200 --> 0:17:42.330
<v Speaker 2>It's literally a shithole. I feel sorry for it. I'm

0:17:42.350 --> 0:17:43.350
<v Speaker 2>glad you didn't have one.

0:17:43.369 --> 0:17:46.109
<v Speaker 1>Oh, well, yeah, that would be terrible.

0:17:46.210 --> 0:17:47.270
<v Speaker 2>And people don't.

0:17:47.410 --> 0:17:48.609
<v Speaker 1>A lot of people don't.

0:17:48.690 --> 0:17:49.229
<v Speaker 2>This is what I meant.

0:17:49.250 --> 0:17:50.609
<v Speaker 1>Not a lot of people, but people have to have

0:17:50.670 --> 0:17:53.689
<v Speaker 1>bags and stuff. Okay, so all right, then be grateful

0:17:53.730 --> 0:17:56.560
<v Speaker 1>for your date hole then and moisturise it. Just get some,

0:17:58.020 --> 0:17:59.140
<v Speaker 1>you're right, don't use.

0:17:59.119 --> 0:18:00.280
<v Speaker 2>Like all these shops. Oh, look, I'll give you all

0:18:00.320 --> 0:18:01.859
<v Speaker 2>the details next week, okay?

0:18:01.960 --> 0:18:04.320
<v Speaker 1>Give us all the details next week. Great. All right,

0:18:04.460 --> 0:18:05.580
<v Speaker 1>should we get out of here, Mel?

0:18:06.200 --> 0:18:07.120
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think we should.

0:18:07.490 --> 0:18:09.170
<v Speaker 1>All right, everyone, we're going to get out of here.

0:18:09.230 --> 0:18:11.240
<v Speaker 1>Thank you so much for listening. Come back next week

0:18:11.300 --> 0:18:15.680
<v Speaker 1>and we will report on whether Mel has a nice, soft-scented,

0:18:16.600 --> 0:18:21.929
<v Speaker 1>super slippery or slimy or succulent date hole.

0:18:22.650 --> 0:18:26.369
<v Speaker 2>I'll take a before and after. Take a before and after.

0:18:26.750 --> 0:18:30.840
<v Speaker 1>That's what's going on Instagram. Everyone, thank you so much

0:18:30.880 --> 0:18:32.830
<v Speaker 1>for listening. We love that you do choose our pod

0:18:32.850 --> 0:18:35.670
<v Speaker 1>to listen to. Give us a rating or a comment

0:18:35.690 --> 0:18:38.970
<v Speaker 1>wherever you listen. Hit us up on our Instagram, showandtellpodcast

0:18:39.010 --> 0:18:40.330
<v Speaker 1>is where you can find us. We'd love to hear

0:18:40.350 --> 0:18:42.250
<v Speaker 1>from you. We do do a Patreon, which is an

0:18:42.290 --> 0:18:46.919
<v Speaker 1>extra podcast every two weeks over at patreon.com forward slash showandtellpodcast.

0:18:46.980 --> 0:18:48.720
<v Speaker 1>They start about five bucks a month. Just help with

0:18:48.740 --> 0:18:51.240
<v Speaker 1>the running of the pod. But we'll chat to you soon.

0:18:51.400 --> 0:18:51.919
<v Speaker 1>Toot toot.

0:18:52.520 --> 0:18:52.980
<v Speaker 2>Love yous.