1 00:00:08,960 --> 00:00:13,360 Speaker 1: Hi everybody, Carli here, Welcome to this week's Mojo Monday. 2 00:00:13,840 --> 00:00:17,119 Speaker 1: Today we are diving into a question and it's a 3 00:00:17,239 --> 00:00:20,319 Speaker 1: very powerful question that we can ask ourselves and it 4 00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:24,200 Speaker 1: comes from the Japanese self reflection practice non as n 5 00:00:24,280 --> 00:00:29,600 Speaker 1: i can, which is Naika n And I know many 6 00:00:29,680 --> 00:00:32,400 Speaker 1: of you, like me, are into journaling, so if you 7 00:00:32,440 --> 00:00:35,320 Speaker 1: would like to experiment with this as a journaling exercise, 8 00:00:35,360 --> 00:00:39,760 Speaker 1: I would highly recommend it. And here's why. So research 9 00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:43,760 Speaker 1: shows that self focused attention, which I've talked a lot about, 10 00:00:44,640 --> 00:00:49,120 Speaker 1: is this tendency to tune into our own thoughts and 11 00:00:49,240 --> 00:00:55,680 Speaker 1: feelings and those bodily sensations that come up like shaking 12 00:00:55,840 --> 00:01:00,360 Speaker 1: or clammy hands or rapid heart rate and ease. If 13 00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:05,600 Speaker 1: we focus on these things, that can significantly increase our anxieties, 14 00:01:05,680 --> 00:01:11,080 Speaker 1: our fears, our worries. The vast majority of us feel 15 00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:15,520 Speaker 1: some level of these emotions, like anxiety, which is very normal. 16 00:01:15,640 --> 00:01:19,319 Speaker 1: They're normal stress responses, but of course there are those 17 00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:23,440 Speaker 1: who really struggle. When we're hyper aware of ourselves, we 18 00:01:23,480 --> 00:01:27,479 Speaker 1: can develop a heightened self focus, and this can lead 19 00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:36,480 Speaker 1: to exasperated negative thoughts, rumination, exaggerated fears, catastrophizing, and ultimately 20 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:40,959 Speaker 1: avoidance behaviors. So if you've been listening to me for 21 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:43,600 Speaker 1: a while, you would know I talk a lot about 22 00:01:43,840 --> 00:01:48,520 Speaker 1: using our attention and n CAN is really helpful in 23 00:01:48,640 --> 00:01:52,560 Speaker 1: controlling where our attention is. And studies have shown that 24 00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:57,000 Speaker 1: i CAN used in psychotherapy is extremely effective in treating 25 00:01:57,040 --> 00:02:01,680 Speaker 1: those with generalized anxiety disorder and panic disorder. So if 26 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:05,800 Speaker 1: we can shift our attention away from ourselves to help 27 00:02:05,880 --> 00:02:10,560 Speaker 1: us live better even when we feel scared or anxious, 28 00:02:10,639 --> 00:02:13,880 Speaker 1: or nervous or worried, worried about what the other people 29 00:02:13,919 --> 00:02:16,600 Speaker 1: think of us, this is where nikan can come in. 30 00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:23,120 Speaker 1: So nikan is it's from Japan, means inside looking or introspection, 31 00:02:24,080 --> 00:02:28,800 Speaker 1: and it encourages us to reflect on our relationships and 32 00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:34,240 Speaker 1: experience and our experiences with three questions as a guide. 33 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:38,000 Speaker 1: But today we're not going to focus on all three questions. 34 00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:41,320 Speaker 1: We're just going to focus on the first question, and 35 00:02:41,360 --> 00:02:46,040 Speaker 1: that is what have I received? So at its core, 36 00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:50,680 Speaker 1: what have I received guides us to shift our focus 37 00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:55,720 Speaker 1: from our internal anxieties or internal states to the external 38 00:02:55,760 --> 00:02:59,040 Speaker 1: world and the people around us and all the things 39 00:02:59,080 --> 00:03:03,480 Speaker 1: that we are given every single day from others. It's 40 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:07,880 Speaker 1: such a simple question, but it can really shift our 41 00:03:07,919 --> 00:03:11,880 Speaker 1: perspective on our lives. So when we take the time 42 00:03:11,919 --> 00:03:15,760 Speaker 1: to consider all that we have received from others, we 43 00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:20,000 Speaker 1: begin to see this vast network of support and kindness 44 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:24,280 Speaker 1: that surrounds us every single day. So think about it 45 00:03:24,320 --> 00:03:29,280 Speaker 1: for a moment. Every day we benefit from the hard work, 46 00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:34,480 Speaker 1: the efforts, and the contributions of countless people, many of whom, 47 00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:38,280 Speaker 1: in fact, most of whom we have never met. So 48 00:03:38,360 --> 00:03:41,720 Speaker 1: take this podcast for example, that you're listening to right now. 49 00:03:42,840 --> 00:03:46,520 Speaker 1: You have received this from Adam Curry and Dave Winer. 50 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:49,640 Speaker 1: I did a Google search. So if it wasn't for 51 00:03:49,680 --> 00:03:52,880 Speaker 1: these two men, who you don't know and they don't 52 00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:56,119 Speaker 1: know you, you wouldn't be listening to me right now 53 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:59,119 Speaker 1: because they created the podcast back in two thousand and one. 54 00:03:59,360 --> 00:04:02,400 Speaker 1: So thank you, Thank you, Adam and Dave. And here's 55 00:04:02,440 --> 00:04:05,920 Speaker 1: another one. So what have you eaten today? So maybe 56 00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:09,960 Speaker 1: you ate free range eggs for breakfast? And I say 57 00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:12,880 Speaker 1: pre range because I don't believe in caged eggs. So 58 00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:16,599 Speaker 1: but that's just a side note. So you received these 59 00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:19,800 Speaker 1: eggs from the farmers who raise the chickens. You received 60 00:04:19,839 --> 00:04:24,200 Speaker 1: the eggs from the chickens themselves, the machinery operators who 61 00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:27,359 Speaker 1: packed the eggs into cartons, and there was a truck 62 00:04:27,440 --> 00:04:30,839 Speaker 1: driver who drove them to the supermarket or the store 63 00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:34,640 Speaker 1: to the person who then stopped the shelf, so you 64 00:04:34,680 --> 00:04:37,920 Speaker 1: could walk to the aisle, choose your eggs, take them 65 00:04:37,920 --> 00:04:41,520 Speaker 1: to the cash register to pay, and then take them home. 66 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:44,800 Speaker 1: So you get the picture here. I could go deeper 67 00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:48,560 Speaker 1: and deeper into this, but what it illustrates is that 68 00:04:48,600 --> 00:04:52,400 Speaker 1: we are so connected to so many people who help 69 00:04:52,520 --> 00:04:56,440 Speaker 1: us live in this world, people who help us function 70 00:04:57,040 --> 00:04:59,919 Speaker 1: and contribute to our wellbeing and the richness of it 71 00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:02,719 Speaker 1: our lives. And I find this one of the most 72 00:05:02,839 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 1: humbling reflections because now we're not just thinking about ourselves 73 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:11,440 Speaker 1: and our problems. We're expanding our view of our place 74 00:05:11,560 --> 00:05:15,640 Speaker 1: in the world and all we have been given. When 75 00:05:15,720 --> 00:05:21,000 Speaker 1: we practice this reflection, we intentionally divert our attention away 76 00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:25,279 Speaker 1: from our own worries and instead cultivate a sense of 77 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:29,920 Speaker 1: very deep gratitude and connection. And we know from the 78 00:05:29,960 --> 00:05:33,800 Speaker 1: research how important gratitude is for our mental health. It 79 00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:37,000 Speaker 1: helps us recognize that we are part of a larger, 80 00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:41,800 Speaker 1: interconnected community, and what this reflection can do is reduce 81 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:46,719 Speaker 1: our self focused attention and foster a sense of appreciation 82 00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:53,960 Speaker 1: and humility. Let's try a short exercise together. So close 83 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:58,440 Speaker 1: your eyes. Obviously, if you're driving, don't close your eyes, 84 00:05:58,520 --> 00:06:01,640 Speaker 1: but if you can closeure eye guys, and take a 85 00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:10,800 Speaker 1: deep breath. Now, think about your day so far. What 86 00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:18,120 Speaker 1: have you received today? Maybe it's something as simple as 87 00:06:18,120 --> 00:06:24,200 Speaker 1: the morning coffee that you enjoyed. So think about who 88 00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:34,800 Speaker 1: grew those coffee beans, who transported them, who prepared your coffee, 89 00:06:36,279 --> 00:06:39,960 Speaker 1: who ensured that the water used to make the coffee 90 00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:45,719 Speaker 1: is clean, All those people who were involved in ensuring 91 00:06:45,760 --> 00:06:53,919 Speaker 1: that you could enjoy that first sip of your morning coffee. So, 92 00:06:54,120 --> 00:07:01,080 Speaker 1: as you reflect on this question what have I received? 93 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:04,760 Speaker 1: Notice how your focus shifts away from your own thoughts, 94 00:07:05,440 --> 00:07:09,960 Speaker 1: your own feelings, to this broader perspective of interdependence and 95 00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:18,280 Speaker 1: deep gratitude. This simple shift in attention can reduce intense 96 00:07:18,320 --> 00:07:21,800 Speaker 1: emotions and feelings and help you feel more connected with 97 00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:26,800 Speaker 1: the world around you. So by regularly practicing this reflection, 98 00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:29,680 Speaker 1: we can train our minds to move away from the 99 00:07:29,760 --> 00:07:36,560 Speaker 1: habitual self focus that often exasperates our emotions. Instead, we 100 00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:40,640 Speaker 1: can open ourselves to this world of gratitude and connection. 101 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:44,680 Speaker 1: In fact, I like to call this gratitude on steroids 102 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:49,600 Speaker 1: because it can go to so many deep layers. So 103 00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:53,200 Speaker 1: next time you're feeling overwhelmed by your thoughts or your emotions, 104 00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:56,800 Speaker 1: ask yourself what if I received today and take a 105 00:07:56,880 --> 00:08:02,360 Speaker 1: moment to appreciate this web of support surrounds you. So 106 00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:05,200 Speaker 1: this is just one of three questions of the nai 107 00:08:05,280 --> 00:08:09,560 Speaker 1: Can reflection, which is a journal reflection that I often do. 108 00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:13,560 Speaker 1: And I'll delve into the other two questions next week, 109 00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:17,800 Speaker 1: but in the meantime, try this one question. And if 110 00:08:17,840 --> 00:08:21,920 Speaker 1: you are struggling with a relationship right now, this is 111 00:08:22,200 --> 00:08:28,960 Speaker 1: a really effective healing exercise where you can ask this 112 00:08:29,080 --> 00:08:34,000 Speaker 1: question what have I received? Just on one person. So 113 00:08:34,040 --> 00:08:38,440 Speaker 1: if we take away the judgment, take away the hurt, 114 00:08:38,960 --> 00:08:41,840 Speaker 1: and just write down what have I received from this person, 115 00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:47,400 Speaker 1: it can widen the perspective of the situation. As always, 116 00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:51,439 Speaker 1: I hope you have got value from this episode of 117 00:08:51,559 --> 00:08:57,240 Speaker 1: Mojo Monday. Please consider subscribing if you haven't already, and 118 00:08:57,720 --> 00:09:00,320 Speaker 1: we would love it if you could leave us a 119 00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:03,920 Speaker 1: review on Apple Podcasts as it helps keep the podcast going. 120 00:09:04,960 --> 00:09:07,160 Speaker 1: And thank you so much for listening. I'll see you 121 00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:07,680 Speaker 1: next week.