Speaker 1: Hello, and welcome to separate bathrooms.
Speaker 2: I was wondering if you were going to do that.
Speaker 2: Hang on, cute the new music. Please, Hello and welcome
Speaker 2: to the heart of it. My name's Ali Daddo.
Speaker 1: I'm cam Dado.
Speaker 2: We would like to acknowledge the Gadigor people of the orination,
Speaker 2: the traditional custodians of this land, and pay our respects
Speaker 2: to the elders, both past and present.
Speaker 1: It's exciting.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 1: It's been a few months in the making. We've decided
Speaker 1: to take the leap from the shower, the baths and
Speaker 1: sinks and join you in the main house.
Speaker 2: Gracious a daisy, exactly fresh as the mountain stream factory.
Speaker 1: Fresh we are.
Speaker 2: We're like toothpaste. We're tingling and fresh.
Speaker 1: Yeah, bright eyed and freshy child.
Speaker 2: Oh look, just like a healthy relationship. Things grow and change, right,
Speaker 2: and here we are, we're getting to the heart of it.
Speaker 1: After several hundred episodes in the bathroom.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we began podcasting like five years ago.
Speaker 1: It was five years ago.
Speaker 2: That's wild, isn't it. And our intention was always to
Speaker 2: just sort of set the record straight about our relationship
Speaker 2: if anyone needed to know.
Speaker 1: In our words though, right because there were people writing
Speaker 1: their version of it, so.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, and we wanted to talk to guests also
Speaker 2: really about how they made their relationships work. That was
Speaker 2: our curiosity and then maybe we could learn something and
Speaker 2: you could all learn something.
Speaker 1: That's right. I mean, we had no there was no
Speaker 1: time frame, there was no agenda, kept our expectations pretty
Speaker 1: low about who would actually listen. And the fact that
Speaker 1: we're still here is a testament to you. So thank you, yes,
Speaker 1: very much so.
Speaker 2: And now well we've listened, and evidently you still want
Speaker 2: to listen too, so thank you, and onwards we goward
Speaker 2: we go.
Speaker 1: So we're just as interested as ever in stories, be
Speaker 1: it relationships or simply stories about life and getting to
Speaker 1: the heart of what makes relationships and people unique and special.
Speaker 1: So we haven't been in the studio for a while.
Speaker 2: I know, had a nice break.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so what's going on. Just let's give a little.
Speaker 2: Well, I know where, I know what happened with you
Speaker 2: over the summer wasn't exactly the best holiday.
Speaker 1: I guess, no, Look, someone was quiet. I spent some
Speaker 1: time in Sydney's westmeat Hilton.
Speaker 2: Well that is actually the incredible Westmead Hospital. Those of
Speaker 2: you who don't know.
Speaker 1: Big shout out to the to the staff, the doctors, nurses, caterers.
Speaker 2: That was me. I was the caterer. Are you shouting
Speaker 2: ut me?
Speaker 1: I am because look, you know, hospitals are not renowned
Speaker 1: for great food.
Speaker 2: No, and that's okay. They've got a lot of other
Speaker 2: more important things to do. Well.
Speaker 1: I guess it's just providing nutrition to get better. It
Speaker 1: doesn't taste, is not a premium. But so Ali would
Speaker 1: visit me and she brought those cherries summer cherries that
Speaker 1: kept me going for a couple of days.
Speaker 2: But truly, the doctors and nurses were just all round
Speaker 2: care of you. I am super appreciative.
Speaker 1: So look in any in any case, I am sincerely
Speaker 1: on the mend, albeit with some extra bits and bobs
Speaker 1: in the gizzards. Do you like going to that down
Speaker 1: the road? Yeah? You know how to welcome a stent episode?
Speaker 2: Yeah, there you go or multiple stamps?
Speaker 1: So what about you?
Speaker 2: I well, I had been I'm finally able to talk
Speaker 2: about a new TV show that I am doing for
Speaker 2: Foxtowel that I am incredibly honored to be a small
Speaker 2: part of. It's really a sorry part you're hosting and honey, yeah,
Speaker 2: I know, but really the stories are about these families
Speaker 2: that are we talking to. It's called gen Well, and
Speaker 2: it's really about the holistic way for families, generational families
Speaker 2: from babies to great grandmothers and grand you know, great
Speaker 2: grandfathers as well, how we stay well and there's the
Speaker 2: different modalities that we can use to stay well. And
Speaker 2: it's really really beautiful. It's also very heart driven. So
Speaker 2: it's very very excited to be a part of it.
Speaker 1: So when you start shooting.
Speaker 2: That is later in the in the year, okay, and.
Speaker 1: It comes on to foxtails, to.
Speaker 2: Foxtel, Yeah, June June. I think it comes on June July.
Speaker 1: Yep, yeah, brilliant. Well, we've rebranded we are the heart
Speaker 1: of it. It's a brand new year, twenty twenty five.
Speaker 1: We're still going to be talking about relationships and couples.
Speaker 2: And absolutely and we've always been about the heart of
Speaker 2: the relationship and now we're just going to be, you know,
Speaker 2: maybe digging a little deeper and seeing what else couples
Speaker 2: have got to say. We've got some amazing people coming
Speaker 2: up throughout the year. We've actually got repeat a vendors.
Speaker 2: Mitch Tambo and his gorgeous wife Leleah lovely love those two.
Speaker 2: Casey Barnes country and it's great. And his wife Michelle,
Speaker 2: one of our favorite ladies who works at Nova, Rachel Corbett.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's amazing.
Speaker 2: Yes, she's got her own podcast O. Yes, it's about
Speaker 2: being a single month exactly. That'll be a ripper. And
Speaker 2: just also we've got Sarah Pasco and her husband Steine,
Speaker 2: so that's also going to be a great chat, brilliant.
Speaker 1: Well, here's where I think we should start. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: given that we are exploring relationships to the heart of it, yes,
Speaker 1: say it again.
Speaker 2: We've got it, right, I'm sure we will.
Speaker 1: Here's something we can check out, right, So it's an
Speaker 1: online lifestyle platform called rest Less Restless Restless. It's an
Speaker 1: English one. I think ten game changing dating strategies. So
Speaker 1: this is twenty twenty five.
Speaker 2: This is a single one, is it? Or if it's
Speaker 2: already if you're dating, could be whatever.
Speaker 1: But if you're into dating, then here's some game changing
Speaker 1: dating strategies for twenty twenty five. I mean, I think
Speaker 1: given that we're in the first quarter of the year,
Speaker 1: it's probably a perfect time to throw out any old
Speaker 1: and outdated habits. Some fresh new strategies. We love that.
Speaker 2: One of my best friends is looking for love, so
Speaker 2: absolutely she's always looking for tips.
Speaker 1: Okay, so ten ideas in this article, yep, for ways
Speaker 1: you can mix things up this year, whether you're looking
Speaker 1: for love online or out in the real world. So
Speaker 1: you've got this list in front of you too, I
Speaker 1: do now, Yeah, okay, So I'll do the first one.
Speaker 2: Yep.
Speaker 1: Ask your friends to choose your dad.
Speaker 2: Yes, oh, I would be really good at that.
Speaker 1: Friends to choose who you go on dates with. They
Speaker 1: could basically be unpaid matchmakers and suggest the right people
Speaker 1: for yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you hand them the dating
Speaker 1: app and let them swipe on your behalf.
Speaker 2: I wanted to do that when our daughter was on
Speaker 2: the app. She's no longer on the app. She's found love, though.
Speaker 2: I remember I wanted to choose just because I was
Speaker 2: fascinated by the whole thing. But like, I know who
Speaker 2: I think would be good for our girl. Yeah, and
Speaker 2: you do, and she's found It was great. Oh okay.
Speaker 2: So have you ever heard of the three three three rule?
Speaker 1: No? I haven't, but I did a little dive into it,
Speaker 1: and apparently it was a TikToker came up with it.
Speaker 2: Oh really, well, then it must be amazing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, right, three three, that's what you know. That's what
Speaker 1: I do when I go to casino. I put three
Speaker 1: on the rule. That will three times and then I'll no,
Speaker 1: I did not know that. That's if I ever go
Speaker 1: into casino. How often I do that?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Always three? Well three times three times three? Yeah, but
Speaker 1: three and then if I got nothing after the third
Speaker 1: three okay, but I invariably actually do quite well with
Speaker 1: that one.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I like that. So after three dates you
Speaker 2: decide whether you're attracted to each other. I think you
Speaker 2: do know within three dates, Okay, I think that's that's
Speaker 2: pretty clear. So there's there's not like a maybe I
Speaker 2: might be. It's like I'm in or I'm out. Okay,
Speaker 2: So if you're not end it, I like that.
Speaker 1: Yep. And then what happens after three days?
Speaker 2: Okay? So then three weeks you ask yourselves whether, okay,
Speaker 2: do I see a future with this person. It's not
Speaker 2: that you necessarily need to be marriage ready, but just
Speaker 2: to know, you know, is there potential? So and if
Speaker 2: you do, you just carry on dating each other and
Speaker 2: you know. But obviously in those three weeks if you
Speaker 2: had a red flag out done, gone gone. Okay. So
Speaker 2: then three months the final three so you decide if
Speaker 2: you're going to be exclusive and official, will you go
Speaker 2: around with me?
Speaker 1: All right? Or okay, well you.
Speaker 2: You go around with member?
Speaker 1: Is that the Sydney way of doing it? That was
Speaker 1: the Sydney way when Melbourne was would you go with me?
Speaker 2: Oh no, it was go around with me when I
Speaker 2: was a kid. Instead of falling into like a non
Speaker 2: committal nomn's land where it's like, yeah, we're kind of
Speaker 2: I'm seeing other people, it's like, no, it's you, it's
Speaker 2: me and no one else. And you become boyfriend and
Speaker 2: girlfriend or you're you're out.
Speaker 1: You're part ways.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, ok't you know TikTok and makes sense on
Speaker 2: that one. I mind it.
Speaker 1: Well, it takes the it takes them and ring out
Speaker 1: of it. It's like we're going to reassess after that.
Speaker 2: It gives you a bit of a three months yeah yeah,
Speaker 2: and it's not working after three months.
Speaker 1: See, everybody thinks this one. Number three. I actually really
Speaker 1: like this. My father, as you know, my dad is
Speaker 1: huge on AI. He just can't believe I know this
Speaker 1: whole thing, and he uses chat GPT. So this is
Speaker 1: suggesting that how to use chat GPT as your dating coach. Right, so,
Speaker 1: so have.
Speaker 2: You used it as a dating coach?
Speaker 1: No? Have you used chat GPT?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Absolutely? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, Well put it in a prompt like this,
Speaker 1: acting as a professional dating coach. Ask me questions about
Speaker 1: my past relationships until you know my attachment style and
Speaker 1: ideal partner. Then give me a thirty day plan of
Speaker 1: action to find that ideal partner.
Speaker 2: Oh, that's quite detailed, so you'd have to input a
Speaker 2: lot of information. I guess that could actually be quite
Speaker 2: fun and quite illuminating. Actually, because you're putting it down
Speaker 2: on to you know, you're writing about it, you might
Speaker 2: actually find something about yourself that you didn't even realize.
Speaker 2: But you know, sometimes when you verbalize something or write
Speaker 2: something down and then what does it do? Then it
Speaker 2: gives you a thirty It.
Speaker 1: Gives you a thirty day breakdown of how action, like
Speaker 1: a blueprint, wow, of what to do.
Speaker 2: That's and then then you input the three three three.
Speaker 2: After that, I guess yeah, okay, okay, there you go.
Speaker 1: And then you do number four.
Speaker 2: Now number four, So this is an interesting one. I
Speaker 2: think this is probably might be a little controversial. I
Speaker 2: kind of like this as a like my best friend,
Speaker 2: she does have the heavy conversations early on, and I
Speaker 2: like that she gets the stuff out early because then
Speaker 2: it just sort of gives that person an idea of
Speaker 2: who she is, where she's coming from, what her wants
Speaker 2: and needs are, and then you can either jump in
Speaker 2: from there. And so I do think openness is a
Speaker 2: real key, especially if you want marriage and commitment. So
Speaker 2: just sort of, you know, spilling those beans. I mean,
Speaker 2: I'm not talking about absolutely everything. Do you want to
Speaker 2: scare the person away, but you know, if you're not
Speaker 2: searching for just a deeper connection, just you know, have
Speaker 2: at it. But I think being open from the start
Speaker 2: about what you're looking for, and particularly being very vulnerable
Speaker 2: what you're hoping for, is a really good way to
Speaker 2: sort of screen out incombatible people, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Yeah, I like this one. Only searching for no
Speaker 1: strings sexual marathons with double jointed Marxists. Don't be afraid
Speaker 1: to put that up on your profile.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and a lot of people do. A lot of
Speaker 2: people do, which is cool. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Okay, number five is have sex at a different time.
Speaker 2: Now, how did we jump there? We were having open
Speaker 2: conversations and being vulnerable, and we've gone to number five.
Speaker 2: Have sex at a different time.
Speaker 1: Well, I'm thinking only searching for those sexual marathons with
Speaker 1: double jointed Marxists. Those have sex a different times. So
Speaker 1: if you've used to having sex between seven and nine
Speaker 1: o'clock in the morning, do it in the afternoon.
Speaker 2: Do it at nine thirty, take.
Speaker 1: A different time. Okay.
Speaker 2: Flirt number six, Flirt with people everywhere?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think that's great.
Speaker 2: Well, I think it's how you do it. I think
Speaker 2: it's because that can also be very very could bring
Speaker 2: up a lot of trust issues. If you're in a
Speaker 2: relationship and your partner starts flirting with the opposite sex
Speaker 2: in front of you, that would find that would feel
Speaker 2: very I would not like.
Speaker 1: It would be kind of disrespectful. What would be disrected?
Speaker 2: Yeah, but what is it they're talking about? Something different?
Speaker 1: Yeah? I mean it really comes down to what is
Speaker 1: your definition of flirting? Right as well? Right, because I
Speaker 1: think it goes into easy ways to be more flirty,
Speaker 1: and that is say hello to five new people every day, men, women, babies, dogs,
Speaker 1: Give a stranger a comp about their clothing, ask a
Speaker 1: Barista's advice on what drink to order. Yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: this to me, it's just it's just opening conversations with people,
Speaker 1: and it's like an energetic flirting. It's not so much
Speaker 1: Oh god, you know, what does your husband look?
Speaker 2: Sexual?
Speaker 1: Off?
Speaker 2: Yeah, everyone asked me that I tell you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because so disappointingly say.
Speaker 2: No, I just say, let me show your photo. And
Speaker 2: I love it. Yeah, because the word flirt always it
Speaker 2: brings I don't know if it's for me just being female,
Speaker 2: it brings up a little bit of like, oh, she's
Speaker 2: such a flirt, you know, like where it's a little
Speaker 2: bit of a negative thing, a little bit of a
Speaker 2: like yeah so but I but this is kind of
Speaker 2: it's a different version of flirt. It's just about Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's more about connecting with people. And and I I
Speaker 2: one of my said this before on the podcast and
Speaker 2: to you, I one of my favorite things giving random
Speaker 2: strangers compliments. I love it.
Speaker 1: So that could be construed as some kind of flirting.
Speaker 2: I guess, I guess. Yeah, it's fine.
Speaker 1: It does say here. The best flirts don't save their
Speaker 1: skills for people that they fancy. They interact with everyone,
Speaker 1: So why not try it? For yourself in twenty twenty five. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, talk to many, talk to as many people
Speaker 1: as you can on the bus and the shops, at work,
Speaker 1: in the pub. Keep the conversations lighthearted, complimentary and fun.
Speaker 2: You know what else I like about that is it
Speaker 2: gets people lifting their faces out of their phones if
Speaker 2: you're talking to them as well, which is nice. Okay.
Speaker 2: Number seven, So this is if you are on the
Speaker 2: dating apps, and this is again referencing my friend. She
Speaker 2: does this. She knows all the safety measures. So only
Speaker 2: communicate via dating apps until you meet. And that's a
Speaker 2: really good safety boundary, all right. Because you can chat
Speaker 2: on the dating apps, you don't necessarily have to take
Speaker 2: it off the dating apps until you feel ready and
Speaker 2: secure and feel like, yep, this is someone I can
Speaker 2: give my phone number two or you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: I think it's a really it's a good safety measure
Speaker 2: to have.
Speaker 1: Not only is it safer, but it's probably less satisfying,
Speaker 1: which means you'll both be more motivated to get together
Speaker 1: and have some FaceTime together. Yeah, as soon as possible.
Speaker 1: So when you talk about it being unsafe, when you
Speaker 1: start doing WhatsApp and texts and things like that is
Speaker 1: that also is that kind of catfishing? Yeah, to avoid
Speaker 1: that sort of thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it can make you really vulnerable to the romance
Speaker 2: scams that you do sadly hear about. And I'm going
Speaker 2: to say it's not I'm going to say it's a
Speaker 2: bit more of a female thing, but I don't necessarily is.
Speaker 2: I think men get scammed as well, you know, and
Speaker 2: you hear stories all the time, and then it's devastating
Speaker 2: for those people thinking that they're in some real online
Speaker 2: relationship when you're talking to someone in Bolivia that's been
Speaker 2: doing this for five years for a living and getting
Speaker 2: money out of people.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Right, so yeah, keep it safe, keep.
Speaker 1: It safe, keep it stay on the dating app until
Speaker 1: you meet Yeah, okay, number eight multi dates. The days
Speaker 1: of being exclusive with someone you just started dating are over,
Speaker 1: says this article in twenty twenty five. Consider committing to
Speaker 1: the idea of dating more than one person at a
Speaker 1: time until you're both sure how you feel.
Speaker 2: Yeah, back to the three three three Really, Now that's
Speaker 2: an interesting one for me because I just I don't
Speaker 2: know if it's just a personality or a scorpio thing.
Speaker 2: But I would never do that if I'm dating someone.
Speaker 2: I'd only date that post. I couldn't imagine dating multiple people, Like,
Speaker 2: it just would not work for me personally. If it
Speaker 2: works for other people and it's not hurting anyone, go
Speaker 2: for it. But for me, I'm like, I'm a one
Speaker 2: at a time person and I'd.
Speaker 1: Be hopeless because I forget that you'd.
Speaker 2: Call each other, you'd call it the wrong name. It
Speaker 2: wouldn't work. Come on, Karen, remember when I told you
Speaker 2: that last week? Sus Oh no, that wasn't.
Speaker 1: Jenny. Oh No, I wasn't Angel, Jeez.
Speaker 2: Now number nine, which kind of just sort of it's
Speaker 2: a little bit of like state the offer years to
Speaker 2: us fifty and older.
Speaker 1: Thirty three us very we've got so much skin in
Speaker 1: the game in the daily life after being married for that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I just I think it's just our age
Speaker 2: group as well. It's like, have real life dates. So
Speaker 2: what's a real life date? You may be asking go shopping,
Speaker 2: catch the train together before.
Speaker 1: A concert to see that funny fun fun not funny,
Speaker 1: but going to a concert. Getting the train to a concert.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that.
Speaker 1: Or a football game yeah yeah, because traveling in building
Speaker 1: the anticipation and it's.
Speaker 2: So good yep, yep. Cooking dinner together is a nice one. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Make a long car journey, that's our thing.
Speaker 2: Yep.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: We spent a lot of time do some gardening. I
Speaker 2: mean it's a little bit old lady, but you know
Speaker 2: we both like gardening. I know you do. You've always
Speaker 2: liked gardening too.
Speaker 1: Like that's Can I tell you a listener what I
Speaker 1: did over summer speaking dating?
Speaker 2: Oh, I know what you've do.
Speaker 1: I got marsinal dates from the grocery store, ate them,
Speaker 1: kept the seeds, wrap them in wet paper towel, put
Speaker 1: them in a plastic bag for three weeks. They sprouted,
Speaker 1: and now I am growing date palms.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I've got three shoots. Yeah, three seeds have come. I'm
Speaker 1: so exciting.
Speaker 2: It is very exciting.
Speaker 1: Two avocados.
Speaker 2: Avocados are on their way. Yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 1: What else am I working on? Oh you don't know
Speaker 1: about this one. Oh we had lunch at the oaks
Speaker 1: in Neutral Bay and Sunnyah. I found some acorns on
Speaker 1: the ground.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're going to grow an acorn tree. I mean, yes,
Speaker 2: you just need to go out there and sing that
Speaker 2: Poor Kelly song, which one from Little Things.
Speaker 1: From Little Things, Big Things, grow of course, why not
Speaker 1: fast that bloody go to the tree fast screen deb
Speaker 1: So there you go, do some gardening, grow it, grow
Speaker 1: some dates on your.
Speaker 2: All right, last one number ten?
Speaker 1: Oh god go no contact with X's yeah right. So,
Speaker 1: when in a relationship with someone, we become almost addicted
Speaker 1: to their presence. That's one of the reasons why breakups
Speaker 1: are so difficult. Our body and brain are going through
Speaker 1: withdraw from the chemicals we released around.
Speaker 2: That's interesting, isn't it.
Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah, So what does no contact mean?
Speaker 2: Well, also, that sort of withdrawal is sometimes when I
Speaker 2: think people act out of character, you know, I think
Speaker 2: they get sometimes people get a little bit nutty when
Speaker 2: they've had a really hard breakup and they do things
Speaker 2: that they would never think that they would do. You know,
Speaker 2: they might do a little bit of stalking. They might
Speaker 2: call them three a m when they're drunk, like just
Speaker 2: to hear their voice, or you know, I mean follow
Speaker 2: film just like it's just it's kind of looking for
Speaker 2: a little bit of a fix sometimes. So that can
Speaker 2: be not so good for our mental health if we're
Speaker 2: stuck in that kind of addiction.
Speaker 1: So twenty twenty five, if you've broken up with someone,
Speaker 1: no contact. Yeah, move on. It's as hard as that is.
Speaker 2: I delete all the old voicemails and voice notes, delete
Speaker 2: them from social media.
Speaker 1: Yeah, don't go scrolling for them in social media.
Speaker 2: Yeah, don't wear any of the clothes they left. Don't
Speaker 2: be sniffing the shirt.
Speaker 1: Wow. No asking mutual friends about them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, or trying to avoid bumping into them. I used
Speaker 2: to do that with this old well before you, my love,
Speaker 2: this ex boyfriend of mine. I used to try to
Speaker 2: show up wherever I thought he was going to be.
Speaker 2: I was so heartbroken and do you see him?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I did. Sometimes it made no difference whatsoever. No difference.
Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, Well, there you go. Ten tips about
Speaker 1: dating from a couple that have not been on the
Speaker 1: scene in thirty years.
Speaker 2: Take it from us.
Speaker 1: We are off and running.
Speaker 2: You just went straight to the heart of it, Annie,
Speaker 2: There you go.
Speaker 1: I did.
Speaker 2: It's really great to be with you again. In twenty
Speaker 2: twenty five. As we mentioned, we have some fantastic guests.
Speaker 2: We are going to be getting to the heart of
Speaker 2: it of course, with all of the couples and experts
Speaker 2: as well. I'm sure that we'll be having on the show.
Speaker 1: There you go, catch up with you next time. On
Speaker 1: the heart of it,