Speaker 1: Apogay Production.
Speaker 2: Welcome to the She Rises Podcast. I'm Ashley and I'm Tiana.
Speaker 2: This podcast is about female empowerment and encouraging you to
Speaker 2: be your biggest, boldest, and most authentic version of yourself.
Speaker 1: We help you shed the shame, grow to a new level.
Speaker 1: We're gonna laugh, cry, and talk about the topics everyone
Speaker 1: else is too afraid to talk about.
Speaker 2: Get ready for your next level of self.
Speaker 1: Hello everybody, Welcome back to a Wednesday episode where I'm
Speaker 1: gonna ask lovely Tiana a bunch of questions and I'm
Speaker 1: also going to answer them.
Speaker 2: But the trick is she doesn't know what I'm gonna
Speaker 2: ask her. I am low key terrified.
Speaker 1: No, they're not scary questions. They're just really deep questions.
Speaker 1: And one of them was actually inspired by Taj, which
Speaker 1: we'll do at the end, because he asked me this
Speaker 1: last week and that's what kind of sparked the idea
Speaker 1: of this episode. Some to ask some deep questions because
Speaker 1: I just love hearing your perspective on things. And also,
Speaker 1: you guys listening, think about what you would answer because
Speaker 1: it helps get clarity. Do were you're at, what you're
Speaker 1: wanting maybe what's not serving you just gonna be a fun,
Speaker 1: more deeper episode.
Speaker 2: I love it all right.
Speaker 1: First question, if there is one thing that you could
Speaker 1: change from your past, what would it be and why I.
Speaker 2: Wouldn't go back and change anything. There's nothing that really
Speaker 2: comes to mind, because when I look at my journey
Speaker 2: and the woman that I am today, if I didn't
Speaker 2: have to go through the things that I went through,
Speaker 2: I wouldn't be who I am. Yes, you know what
Speaker 2: I mean. So there's nothing that I would take out,
Speaker 2: because then it would mean that I wouldn't get to
Speaker 2: be this version of me. I'm proud of this version
Speaker 2: of me, you know. So I don't think that there's
Speaker 2: anything that I would change, even all the hardship, even
Speaker 2: all the stuff that I went even the sex tape, Like,
Speaker 2: I wouldn't change it. And it sounds a bit weird
Speaker 2: because you're like, why that's cool to happen. But I
Speaker 2: needed to go through the change and the shame and
Speaker 2: all of the things that came up for me around
Speaker 2: that so I could evolve into this version of me
Speaker 2: that's really freaking cool. How about you.
Speaker 1: I think I would have loved to have changed when
Speaker 1: I started doing nervous system regulation, work because I think
Speaker 1: I wish I was a better mother for Tage when
Speaker 1: he was a baby. The version of who I am
Speaker 1: now and how I've been out to be for Tala
Speaker 1: is just so different. Not that I was a bad
Speaker 1: mum before any Karen's jump at me. I was just
Speaker 1: so disregulated. I was so depressed. I really wasn't coping
Speaker 1: with life. It was at the peak in my career,
Speaker 1: the peak of the trolls, and I just I just
Speaker 1: feel like I was an anxious wreck. Like I remember
Speaker 1: times where we'd be driving, He'd be screaming in the
Speaker 1: back and I would have a full blown panic attack.
Speaker 1: I could not handle him crying. I have to pull
Speaker 1: over and I would be shaking, trying to calm myself
Speaker 1: down whilst my child is crying and as if he's
Speaker 1: going to calm down when I'm like that, and I
Speaker 1: just look back and I have compassion for myself because I.
Speaker 2: Was really just not in a good way.
Speaker 1: I don't think I gave him realized how deep and
Speaker 1: dark I was in because I had to continue to
Speaker 1: show up for zashi Byn's and do this and do that,
Speaker 1: and support these women and do all these ads and
Speaker 1: fund the business and show up on stage and I
Speaker 1: had to put the front on. I enjoyed all of that,
Speaker 1: but whilst trying to hold my pain, I just, yeah,
Speaker 1: I didn't cope. I wish I started it earlier so
Speaker 1: he could have had this version of me. Yeah, But
Speaker 1: then I look at him and I feel him and
Speaker 1: I see him, and he's just the most beautiful little boy.
Speaker 1: He's so compassionate and loving and caring, and he's such
Speaker 1: a good listener and he's just beautiful. So I did
Speaker 1: something right. But yeah, that's what I wish I could
Speaker 1: take back. If I ever think about guilt and shame,
Speaker 1: it's always around him as a little baby and toddler,
Speaker 1: and even the thought of you know, when I've spoken
Speaker 1: about how I wanted to end my life, he was,
Speaker 1: you know, a year and a half, and I would
Speaker 1: just carry guilt around, like the thought of leaving him behind,
Speaker 1: like how could I do that to my son? So yeah,
Speaker 1: what makes the emotional.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I just feel sad.
Speaker 3: This always comes up, heh. But like I've done like
Speaker 3: three shame circles and it's always the same thing. I
Speaker 3: just feel feel sad that he got that version of me,
Speaker 3: and I feel stoke talal against his version of me.
Speaker 3: But I sometimes look at him and I'm like, oh,
Speaker 3: I wish I could have done better for him, but
Speaker 3: I was like barely keeping my.
Speaker 2: Own head afloat, you know.
Speaker 3: So yeah, that's what I would change. Gosh, it always
Speaker 3: brings it up.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like, yeah, I've broke through that. Nope, Hello, yeah
Speaker 2: it's still there. Players Yeah.
Speaker 1: I always wonder if that's always just gonna sit there, Like,
Speaker 1: well I ever move through that? Okay, tears are out
Speaker 1: right now. Do you think there is one thing that
Speaker 1: truly holds you back from achieving your goals, from being
Speaker 1: who you want to be, from living the life you
Speaker 1: want it? Do you think there's one thing that keeps
Speaker 1: arising And you're like, oh.
Speaker 2: I would say there's like these deep underlying belief that
Speaker 2: I have that like I'm not capable of achieving the
Speaker 2: things that I want and I've lotable. I feel like
Speaker 2: it comes out in everything that I do, Like even
Speaker 2: when I'm doing stuff, it's there, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: It's not like it goes away or like you learn
Speaker 2: how to deal with it and it becomes quieter. But
Speaker 2: I just feel like there's definitely a deep root of
Speaker 2: beliefs sometimes where I'll lean on that belief when I'm
Speaker 2: procrastinating or something and I notice the fear, and you know,
Speaker 2: maybe there'll be certain areas in my life or business
Speaker 2: or maybe something that I do where I'm like, oh,
Speaker 2: like I want to reach for the stars, but then
Speaker 2: I feel like, but what if I fuck it up?
Speaker 2: Or like what if it doesn't work out, or what
Speaker 2: if you know, I'm not capable, And it's just like
Speaker 2: this little niggle of like a fear that kind of
Speaker 2: just like lingers around. So I think that definitely in
Speaker 2: the past, I would say that that's stopped me, and
Speaker 2: I can even see where it comes up. Now whenever
Speaker 2: I'm procrastinating or whatever, I'm like, I notice it and
Speaker 2: then I'm like, okay, cool. The only difference is now
Speaker 2: I'm a little bit better at learning how to move
Speaker 2: regardless of that fear, you know, like now I'm conscious
Speaker 2: of the fact that the fear can be there. But
Speaker 2: then go, okay, like I don't have to let this
Speaker 2: fear define me now. You know. It's like, do I
Speaker 2: really want this fear to be the reason why I
Speaker 2: don't achieve what I want or prove to myself that
Speaker 2: I'm capable or create the impact that I know that
Speaker 2: I'm capable of doing. It's like, is that fear and
Speaker 2: the thought of the fear worth me not doing all
Speaker 2: those incredible things? And it's just not. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 2: so I can catch it and I can clock it,
Speaker 2: but I have to be aware of it, you know,
Speaker 2: because it's just there. Yeah, I love that. One's kind
Speaker 2: of similar. It's similar. Similar. Lately, I've been saying some
Speaker 2: weird words me and you now the day vibe, but
Speaker 2: you were saying every now and again, we'll both say
Speaker 2: something really Bogan, it's just come out.
Speaker 1: And I always combine Katie and j our producers their
Speaker 1: name Katie and k Yeah, okay, mine's similar, And I
Speaker 1: catch myself in it, and I think I catch myself
Speaker 1: quicker because you're next to me, because it revolves around
Speaker 1: our work, and it's around the podcast, around teaching, around
Speaker 1: our events, around our future plans I have. I don't
Speaker 1: know if it's a post syndrome self doubt, just a
Speaker 1: story that I.
Speaker 2: Can't do it because I'm not a coach.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I haven't studied to become a coach, and I'm
Speaker 1: never claiming to be a coach. I've always just shared
Speaker 1: my life online and it's resonated and helped and people
Speaker 1: can take it with a grain of salt. But I
Speaker 1: have little moments of like can I get up and
Speaker 1: talk about that? Yeah, in my own books too, because
Speaker 1: I catch it pretty quickly and be like, sure, that's silly,
Speaker 1: because I'm not claiming to be a coach, and I
Speaker 1: learned from real people and real experiences and real stories
Speaker 1: and real pain. I couldn't care less if someone's qualified
Speaker 1: or not. Yes, I'm not discrediting that. It's amazing. I
Speaker 1: love that you're qualified and a coach, and so all
Speaker 1: my coaches and psychologists and learn from everyone. But I
Speaker 1: just have to get up there and be myself, and
Speaker 1: people are there to hear our stories and to hear
Speaker 1: what we've learned along the way. But there is those
Speaker 1: little moments of like ooh, I pull back, or I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: you do that, Tiana. I'll sit behind your shadow. I'll
Speaker 1: just be here and you're like, no, no, no, we're doing
Speaker 1: this together. I'll lead here, you can help me with this,
Speaker 1: and you lead here, and you know we'll work together
Speaker 1: as a team vice versa. It's really beautiful because my
Speaker 1: weaknesses are your strengths and vice versa. We both bring
Speaker 1: so much to the table and whatever we're feeling like
Speaker 1: we're lacking in or we need to work on more,
Speaker 1: the other kind of picks it up and teaches us
Speaker 1: as we go.
Speaker 2: It's really cool. We've got a really beautiful dynamic. It
Speaker 2: is beautiful like that. Yeah, But I have a bit
Speaker 2: of self doubt sometimes creep in. I think everyone would
Speaker 2: never work that so human in that in every area
Speaker 2: of life. Yeah, pops up for everyone. You know. It's
Speaker 2: just such an innate thing that we feel today, and
Speaker 2: like it's okay that we feel it, but it doesn't
Speaker 2: have to mean anything about who we are. Yeah. Like
Speaker 2: even literally me just before, like I literally said to actually,
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, I'm just like having a day
Speaker 2: where I'm just like I have doubt today, Like I'm
Speaker 2: doubting myself, myself, you know, doubting what I was saying
Speaker 2: or doubting you know, the things that I was bringing
Speaker 2: up or whatever. But it's like, you know, I think
Speaker 2: there's gonna be a lot of women who can relate
Speaker 2: to that as well.
Speaker 1: And I think it also comes from a place of
Speaker 1: having such high standards for ourselves and for the information
Speaker 1: we deliver and the podcast we do in the events
Speaker 1: that we run. Like if you girls would see the
Speaker 1: behind the scenes work that goes into our events. We
Speaker 1: put our heart and souls into this. It is so
Speaker 1: thought out. We've taken the last fifteen years of us
Speaker 1: doing coaching and getting help and going to events and
Speaker 1: courses and studying and podcasts and bring everything in a condensed,
Speaker 1: compact little box for you girls. Like, there's so much
Speaker 1: put into it. So I think we just have really
Speaker 1: high standards for what we deliver and because weeoplet to
Speaker 1: help so much, we've truly genuinely love making a different
Speaker 1: women's lives. Yeah, and it's just really important to us.
Speaker 1: So I think there's a few layers to it. But yeah,
Speaker 1: that pops off for me. Okay, next good or bad,
Speaker 1: No offense taken. But what is one thing that you
Speaker 1: would change about me? It can be funny, it can
Speaker 1: be serious, it can be annoying.
Speaker 2: Oh god, I feel like this is one of those
Speaker 2: questions where we're getting baited, like, yeah, yeah, she's gonna
Speaker 2: hit the I'm just kidding to do this is Steve. Often,
Speaker 2: I'll like ask a question about his past. Yeah, this is.
Speaker 1: We don't want to know.
Speaker 2: That you do. Then it's like yes, it's like I'm
Speaker 2: mad at you. Yeah, okay, what would I There's so
Speaker 2: many beautiful things that I love about you.
Speaker 1: I just it's not the question to I know, you
Speaker 1: don't have to sandwiched.
Speaker 2: You realize you don't have to sandwich Okay. I mentioned
Speaker 2: this to you before in the car where sometimes when
Speaker 2: you're not getting away, or like things aren't going your
Speaker 2: way or things aren't going to plan or something like that,
Speaker 2: you'll delay the way that you speak. It's really slow.
Speaker 2: It's like in a different tone, is it. Yeah? Okay, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: oh do you really like it? Just it's like this
Speaker 2: thing and like I can you can tell them unhappy
Speaker 2: or yeah, It's like it's not angry or anything like that.
Speaker 2: It's just like a it's a difference of energy and
Speaker 2: I can feel it, and I would say that like
Speaker 2: with that, that would be the thing that I would
Speaker 2: like change. It's just like the how does it make
Speaker 2: you feel?
Speaker 1: Just to help me get more clarity, because I think
Speaker 1: for me, I'm taking space to think about how I
Speaker 1: want to say things interesting, But how does it make
Speaker 1: you feel?
Speaker 2: Because that would help me under okay, And the way
Speaker 2: that it makes me feel is that and this is
Speaker 2: obviously a projection, right, this is not necessarily true. This
Speaker 2: is what would be very true.
Speaker 1: Though.
Speaker 2: What my mind thinks of is like, oh, she's not happy,
Speaker 2: but she doesn't want to say yeah because it's a
Speaker 2: delayed thing. Oh yeah. And then it's like if there's
Speaker 2: nothing said afterwards, and I'm like, or what does she think?
Speaker 2: How she feeling? What's going through my mind right now?
Speaker 2: And then I start to project.
Speaker 1: And without transparency, there's uncertainty yea, which is not safe. Yeah, yes,
Speaker 1: that makes so much sense. And yeah, for me, it's
Speaker 1: just take a moment you're triggered or you're upset, or
Speaker 1: you're not sure. Sometimes I'm not sure how to communicate
Speaker 1: that I'm not happy. Yeah, I just need a moment
Speaker 1: to be like, oh, maybe I'll ask her some more
Speaker 1: questions to give me time to think.
Speaker 2: About what I want to say, right, okay, because I'm.
Speaker 1: Just still working on my way to communicate and have
Speaker 1: a voice in a productive kind way, yes, rather just
Speaker 1: being like oh fuck that or I feel like that's.
Speaker 2: Been a huge thing for you as well, Like you're
Speaker 2: always conscious of not being passive aggressive or having the
Speaker 2: dagular stuff. You've had wounds in the past where you've
Speaker 2: been that, so it's like you're overly conscious now of
Speaker 2: making sure that you're not showing up in that way
Speaker 2: because you don't want to create. I want to be
Speaker 2: the most conscious version of yourself to communicate in the
Speaker 2: best way, so I can understand.
Speaker 1: Why I think I would speak before I've thought but
Speaker 1: in the past. Yeah, So I'm just trying to practice
Speaker 1: taking a moment. But Steve says, he says the same
Speaker 1: things he'll notice, like a high pitch voice, for example,
Speaker 1: this is just fluffy, But did you like me and
Speaker 1: like cook And I'm like, yeah, it was good, but
Speaker 1: I think it's spicy as like you hate it.
Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, it didn't taste red.
Speaker 1: But I've had that moment to them be like, oh, actually,
Speaker 1: I don't want to offend him and be like it
Speaker 1: was fucking disgusting.
Speaker 2: So I just need a bit of time to Yeah,
Speaker 2: And you know what, taking time is actually a good
Speaker 2: thing because then it's like you're not having to undo stuff,
Speaker 2: You're not having to clean up mess that you've made.
Speaker 2: If if you maybe react in the way and not
Speaker 2: saying you'd react badly, but taking space in those moments
Speaker 2: is so good because then you can consciously think, like,
Speaker 2: this is what I want to say. It's also a
Speaker 2: trauma response.
Speaker 1: So now I'm thinking about it because I feel like
Speaker 1: I could say my truth with you and you'd be
Speaker 1: able to hold it because you know my intentions aren't
Speaker 1: malicious and I'm just being honest. But I think in
Speaker 1: the past people that haven't been able to hold that
Speaker 1: might have questioned my intention behind it. So now it's
Speaker 1: a trauma response of like, actually, that's right.
Speaker 2: It was spoken about this before where you were like, oh,
Speaker 2: sorry if that was too direct, and there's been times
Speaker 2: we've been mindful of that you'd been like, I'm so
Speaker 2: sorry if I was too direct. I'm like, no, like
Speaker 2: bring it in, but I think you're going to leave.
Speaker 1: I think that's an issues in the past, there's being
Speaker 1: friends that have said it's too much, or you shouldn't
Speaker 1: say that, or that's too loud or too aggressive, or
Speaker 1: you know, you should keep that to yourself.
Speaker 2: I didn't need to hear that. I didn't ask you
Speaker 2: for that. You know, those kind of comments fucked.
Speaker 1: Yes, I think it's a bit of a trauma response.
Speaker 1: Now it's like a bit more hesitant. Yeah, but that's
Speaker 1: not you think that's a me thing?
Speaker 2: Yeah for sure. Isn't it crazy? Though? When we have
Speaker 2: those experiences, it doesn't matter who you're weird, it'll still
Speaker 2: come up if you like comet.
Speaker 1: Super aware of it though, Yeah, yeah, just navigating how
Speaker 1: to ye still use my voice?
Speaker 2: But yeah, it's tricky. Yeah, I'm a work in progress. Okay,
Speaker 2: one thing I will change about you. Okay, I got two. Okay,
Speaker 2: one's funny and one's really serious. Okay.
Speaker 1: The first one is just to charge your flucking phone.
Speaker 1: It gives me anxiety.
Speaker 2: It gives me actual anxiety.
Speaker 1: It'd be we're the gym and at six am, just
Speaker 1: a guy, I'm only on fifteen percent. I'm like, and
Speaker 1: this isn't me thing too, why don't you charge your phone?
Speaker 1: Mine gets below fifty percent. I'm looking for my charge.
Speaker 2: It's true.
Speaker 1: And maybe because I'm a mum, I just have to
Speaker 1: be on high alert that if my nanny needs me
Speaker 1: or the school calls me, I just have to have charge.
Speaker 1: I never go anywhere without it's literally right next to me,
Speaker 1: my portable charger. All the time for your phone to
Speaker 1: be charged. That would be my number one and the
Speaker 1: number two thing I've noticed, and I've spoken to you
Speaker 1: about this so it won't be a shock. And Steve's
Speaker 1: also You've got an isolationship with Steve and he's told
Speaker 1: you as well. Is just we feel that you get
Speaker 1: a bit influenced and lose your voice in relationships. They
Speaker 1: can say a passing comment about the way you're doing
Speaker 1: things or showing up or saying or social media presence,
Speaker 1: you'll take it like gospel, like you change it, and
Speaker 1: you'll do it to fit in with them. And I
Speaker 1: think you kind of lose yourself and then you get
Speaker 1: confused with what you're doing, and then you get stuck
Speaker 1: and you don't know what to do or how to
Speaker 1: show up. I wish for the future that your next
Speaker 1: partner that isn't a thing and you just or even
Speaker 1: if it was. You're so strong in your own beliefs
Speaker 1: of knowing where you want to go and who you
Speaker 1: are and what you want to post and how you
Speaker 1: want to do things because you have so much confidence
Speaker 1: within you until a man comes along and then little
Speaker 1: parts of it just gets shut down.
Speaker 2: I fucking hate it.
Speaker 1: Because you're such a shining star. You're so bright in
Speaker 1: my life, so obviously that being turned down a little bit,
Speaker 1: I'm like, get really protective.
Speaker 2: I'm like, no, I hate it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, really I feel tell me. I know I bring
Speaker 1: it in, but it's from a place of love. I
Speaker 1: love everything about you, and I don't think anything needs
Speaker 1: to be changed. So the thought of someone influencing you
Speaker 1: that you need to change, I'm like, how can you
Speaker 1: change perfection? She's a twelve out of ten and always,
Speaker 1: you know.
Speaker 2: I definitely do do that. I feel that the men
Speaker 2: that i'm especially if they're successful in business. You know,
Speaker 2: this is my second business now and I have my
Speaker 2: coaching business. But I think whenever I have somebody in
Speaker 2: my life who I look up to or i'm inspired by,
Speaker 2: and that usually turns out to be my partners because
Speaker 2: they're either really successful in business or have done or
Speaker 2: are doing what I want to do. It's almost like
Speaker 2: I've prioritize their opinion over my own when it comes
Speaker 2: to put a business because it specifically is around business. Yes,
Speaker 2: And when it comes to that, I'm like, they will
Speaker 2: tell me something a piece of advice or you know,
Speaker 2: I'll share with them and confide in them around something
Speaker 2: in business, and then they'll give me advice, but you
Speaker 2: should be doing this, and they're so convicted in what
Speaker 2: they're doing, I'm like, oh, fuck, am I doing it
Speaker 2: like wrong?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: You know, and it's not changing it wrong, but like, oh,
Speaker 2: could I be doing this better? That work better? Would
Speaker 2: that work better? Would it work faster? Would it be
Speaker 2: more efficient? Like? Is that the way that I need
Speaker 2: to kind of go in life? And so I kind
Speaker 2: of lean on theirs, But then I get further away
Speaker 2: from what I genuinely want to do. So I'm thinking
Speaker 2: about the way to do business based on what they're
Speaker 2: doing instead of what I genuinely want deep down. And
Speaker 2: then I start to question like my ability to make
Speaker 2: decisions because I'm relying on them and not listening to
Speaker 2: myself and changing. And then I get really wishy washy,
Speaker 2: and then I start to kind of like get small.
Speaker 2: Yeah you do.
Speaker 1: I've just seen it twice now, so I just hope
Speaker 1: for the next one that that's not even a thing,
Speaker 1: or if it is, you're strong enough to be like,
Speaker 1: it's your opinion.
Speaker 2: It's definitely truly love what I'm doing. Yeah, it's definitely
Speaker 2: definitely not of them. Think it's more of a meeting,
Speaker 2: you know, because it's my choice to do that. It's
Speaker 2: not that they're forcing me to do anything or saying
Speaker 2: you have to do this or you're going to fail.
Speaker 2: They're not saying that they want the best for me. Yeah,
Speaker 2: And they've only given advice because they do want the best.
Speaker 1: And based on their own experience and what they think,
Speaker 1: which everyone can give you two cents like I can
Speaker 1: give you my two cents compared to anyone around you,
Speaker 1: your parents, whatever, that's.
Speaker 2: Right, And they give advice based on their mistakes, their failures,
Speaker 2: things that they want to help me avoid paying for.
Speaker 2: But it just so happens to be that it might
Speaker 2: be different for what I truly want business.
Speaker 1: So yeah, it makes so much sense. Yeah, all right,
Speaker 1: are you truly happy right now in your.
Speaker 2: Life duality babe? Yeah? Answer, I'm happy in one sense
Speaker 2: where I'm happy with where I'm ad in life, what
Speaker 2: we're doing with the podcast, Like the people in my life,
Speaker 2: I have a lot of gratitude for those things, and
Speaker 2: I'm really grateful to be able to just like wake
Speaker 2: up every day and of a good life and breathe
Speaker 2: and have fresh water and have a roof over my head,
Speaker 2: all those sorts of things. So grateful for the quality
Speaker 2: of life that I live. But then in the same breath,
Speaker 2: there's lots of discomfort as well, you know, discomfort of
Speaker 2: like growing this business with you and like pushing beyond challenges,
Speaker 2: but personal challenges. There's grief. There's you know, holding the
Speaker 2: people that you love in pain, like with everything that
Speaker 2: you guys have just all gone through, do you know
Speaker 2: what I mean? So there's breakups relationship, Yeah, just gone
Speaker 2: through a breakup, So that's hard. Yeah. So there's a
Speaker 2: lot of duality in life. So in one hand, yes,
Speaker 2: there's a part of me that is happy, and then
Speaker 2: there's also a part of me that's also experiencing a
Speaker 2: lot of like sadness at the moment of just like,
Speaker 2: oh my heart hurts a little bit.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, my answer be very similar. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: weird to hold all I feel like. That's what twenty
Speaker 1: twenty five has been about, is actually stretching the capacity
Speaker 1: to be able to hold all the emotions. Because I
Speaker 1: felt like you're either really low and depressed and going
Speaker 1: through hard times or you're really happy in life's good.
Speaker 1: Whereas I wake up each day and go to bed
Speaker 1: each night with gratitude, love, excitement, and then also the deepest,
Speaker 1: darkest grief and sadness and frustration and anger, And I
Speaker 1: like dip in and out of those. Yeah, that's why
Speaker 1: I love end in the night and meditation because it
Speaker 1: just like dissolves all of that and I just get
Speaker 1: to breathe my way to sleep. Yeah, so I'm not
Speaker 1: going to bed with my head ticking out of all
Speaker 1: the emotions. But yeah, I feel both too, a lot
Speaker 1: of grief obviously, little rambo, frustration, anger, disappointment, like energy,
Speaker 1: and then yeah, fuck.
Speaker 2: Your life's good. Yeah, I love life people.
Speaker 1: I'm excited even the challenges in business and life like,
Speaker 1: I'm excited for it all. Yeah, it's been of both
Speaker 1: love that answer. Yeah, if you could have three wishes,
Speaker 1: what would they be doing? Me to go first? I'll go, okay,
Speaker 1: you go, I just off the cast.
Speaker 2: Yes, the first one would be for myself and all
Speaker 2: the people that I love, to be completely financially free,
Speaker 2: like never have to worry about money ever again. And
Speaker 2: I say me and the people that I love, so
Speaker 2: that we can all go on that journey together. So
Speaker 2: I think like life is more beautiful when you're experiencing
Speaker 2: things together. The second one would be like endless opportunities.
Speaker 2: Kind of life is like that anyway, but just like
Speaker 2: endless opportunities for what it is that you want to
Speaker 2: do in terms of what you do it create and
Speaker 2: the impact that you can have through those endless opportunities.
Speaker 2: Can I say like endless wishes?
Speaker 1: No, So Taj actually asked me this question. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: they said that was the run rules. You can't wish
Speaker 1: for more wishes?
Speaker 2: Okay. Three he asked me this last week randomly in
Speaker 2: the car, is like, this is a cool question. The
Speaker 2: last thing I would say is for everyone to be
Speaker 2: able to experience fulfillment, love and for all that's lovely. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that's really cool. How are you Mine?
Speaker 1: Is no animal cruelty, no starvation, beautiful kills me. I
Speaker 1: just no one should ever go without food, water, and
Speaker 1: unlimited money, because then I can help unlimited families, like
Speaker 1: all the medical bills I get sent so many go
Speaker 1: fundments every single day in the amount of families that
Speaker 1: need money to cover medical bills, a never ending problem
Speaker 1: in the world.
Speaker 2: And the experiences you.
Speaker 1: Could take all your friends and family on, Yeah, they
Speaker 1: could all be financially free. Yeah. If you had to
Speaker 1: make so much impact and I know I was to
Speaker 1: come across that kind of money, the good I would
Speaker 1: do with it, Yeah, it wouldn't be wasted.
Speaker 2: Yeah, all right.
Speaker 1: Last one, it's quite a big question time. What is
Speaker 1: your dream life? Would it be different to how you're
Speaker 1: living now? You had your dream life, your dream routine,
Speaker 1: dream day every day, what would that look like? And
Speaker 1: think like dream, I think big, Like would you have
Speaker 1: a driver? Would you have a chef?
Speaker 2: Like all the big things have I'd have a big
Speaker 2: like luxury home one, I'd have a chef. Yeah, I'd
Speaker 2: have like a housekeeper. Yeah. If I had children, I
Speaker 2: would have a nanny to help with that. Unlimited resources
Speaker 2: in terms of being able to like travel, go places,
Speaker 2: get whatever it is in my flight when whenever I want.
Speaker 2: But the vision that I seen for myself is like
Speaker 2: being able to eventually be a mom. Right, But I
Speaker 2: want to be able to be like on stages, like
Speaker 2: I want to be able to create impact and a
Speaker 2: large scale one that seems so far beyond fucking possible
Speaker 2: of what I'm currently doing now it scares the shit
Speaker 2: out of me.
Speaker 1: Like I want to talk like a talk like I
Speaker 1: would love to do that.
Speaker 2: Do stadiums full of people talking like it's terrifying, But
Speaker 2: it also is like the growth that you would have
Speaker 2: as a person. For me to be able to create
Speaker 2: that for myself would be so fulfilling. And working on
Speaker 2: a project that big with so many people around you,
Speaker 2: I feel like would be such a beautiful thing to experience,
Speaker 2: so cool that the part like I obviously want to
Speaker 2: find like my person who you know person, but who
Speaker 2: even is your person? But the body and Clyde kind
Speaker 2: of union, Like I've always just really wanted, like a
Speaker 2: union with somebody to like create and build and like
Speaker 2: make all of these things possible. So that and just
Speaker 2: living a good quality life. Yeah, so always reaching for growth,
Speaker 2: but living simultaneously really good quality of life and being happy.
Speaker 2: That's beautiful.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like might be pretty similar. I truly
Speaker 1: do love my life. I feel like we're outgrowing the
Speaker 1: home we're in, which makes me sad because whenever we
Speaker 1: start looking at homes to buy, which I reckon will
Speaker 1: probably buy one by the year, I would hope, But
Speaker 1: the thought of leaving our street and our home. Our
Speaker 1: home is not a huge mansion at the moment, but
Speaker 1: I don't know, I can't describe. And I walked into
Speaker 1: this home that we live and now we bought, it.
Speaker 2: Just felt like home.
Speaker 1: And I was really craving a massive backyard and a
Speaker 1: massive pool. I wanted a playground, which we just got,
Speaker 1: big trampline, a big pool. That was my main focus.
Speaker 1: It wasn't even more the inside of the house. I
Speaker 1: just wanted that. So when a crame across this property,
Speaker 1: it had the biggest backyard. And then all their neighbors
Speaker 1: there's one, two, three them. They all have toddlers, all
Speaker 1: have kids, and we all hang out and in the afternoons.
Speaker 2: It's just beautiful.
Speaker 1: And I feel so protected, Like even when Steve when
Speaker 1: I went to Sydney, or if I go away Nathan,
Speaker 1: which I've spoken to him about the podcast on the
Speaker 1: podcast before, he's always just checking in. I feel so
Speaker 1: safe having him there, and there's two other dads. I
Speaker 1: just love our neighborhood. And I've never ever lived in
Speaker 1: a neighborhood where neighbors have been so friendly and so supportive,
Speaker 1: and we're all in the same journey of life with kids.
Speaker 2: Yes, it's really cool, but yeah, I feel like we're
Speaker 2: out growing the home. I was like, more space. I
Speaker 2: want a bigger kitchen.
Speaker 1: The kids' rooms are really tiny, so I see that
Speaker 1: for us, I would definitely have a chef. We've had
Speaker 1: a chef before until he stole off us and we
Speaker 1: had to get rid of him. That's crazy, just crazy,
Speaker 1: but it was awesome having a chef. We have a
Speaker 1: cleaner and she's amazing, but probably get one more often. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I need a roabo back, honestly, with those ones that
Speaker 1: just like cleans the house. And just more freedom for Steve.
Speaker 1: I think I have quite a lot of freedom now.
Speaker 1: I can travel and do things, and my work isn't
Speaker 1: relyingt on me being in there all day every day,
Speaker 1: whereas Steve it is. So I'd love more freedom for
Speaker 1: him to be able to travel and do more and
Speaker 1: say with my family. But yeah, there's a lot more
Speaker 1: I would change. I'd make this a full time gig
Speaker 1: and being on stage with you. Yeah, like doing an
Speaker 1: international live too. We would go national first, but eventually
Speaker 1: going overseas and being able to have a stadium full
Speaker 1: of people that come along to our events would be
Speaker 1: so cool.
Speaker 2: That's literally what I mean.
Speaker 1: Our first event had twenty two paid tickets, This next
Speaker 1: one's had fifty paid tickets, and then our next one
Speaker 1: is two f And I feel like we're just going
Speaker 1: to increase each time, which is really cool.
Speaker 2: It is really fun. It's fun seeing it grow in stages.
Speaker 2: It is like because the vision is like unlimited of
Speaker 2: like and do with it, and it's just so much fun.
Speaker 2: It's so much fun. Cool. Well that's all my cousins
Speaker 2: I've got for you. I love it. Have you guys enjoyed?
Speaker 1: And I hope you also reflect on your own questions
Speaker 1: when we ask them, Like even if you going to
Speaker 1: rewind and pause and write down your answers, it would
Speaker 1: be so cool. And if you want to share anything
Speaker 1: but a Facebook forum, she writes, community, come on in
Speaker 1: there and extend the conversation and we'll see you Friday.
Speaker 2: Thanks for joining us. Bye bye