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Speaker 1: And Whipper podcast.

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Speaker 2: We told you she was going to be joining us

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Speaker 2: on the show. She's snuck into the building with Love

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Speaker 2: It a Pieces and have you been paying attention? Is

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Speaker 2: back tonight eight forty pm Ursula Carlson.

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Speaker 3: Will good morning. How are you should?

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Speaker 2: I got to say, sorry, Fitzy is not here. He

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Speaker 2: went to Splendor in the Grass on the weekend.

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Speaker 1: He hasn't made it back around now.

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Speaker 4: Honestly, it's like hell on earth. I saw photos of

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Speaker 4: it and I was like, thank thank god, I'm too.

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Speaker 3: Old for that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it makes Glastonbury look like a desert, doesn't it.

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Speaker 3: Why would you go?

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Speaker 4: You get to an age I guess over nineteen and

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Speaker 4: you're like, I'm never doing that.

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Speaker 2: Hey, We've been asking that question seriously to him for

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Speaker 2: a long time. He's forty five and he's still doing

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Speaker 2: the music music festival thing.

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Speaker 4: No the minute, especially in your forties, like port Loser

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Speaker 4: off the Table?

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Speaker 3: Then have you ever been a music festival person?

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Speaker 2: Though?

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Speaker 3: I mean I've done a couple.

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Speaker 4: I've been to a few falls festivals, but I mean

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Speaker 4: with every single one of them, I go.

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Speaker 3: Why am I here?

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Speaker 4: And I was working at those festivals like I was

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Speaker 4: doing shows at those festivals.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 3: And I was still angry at myself. I was being

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Speaker 3: paid to be there.

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Speaker 2: I was furious, you're paid to be angry. Can you

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Speaker 2: think about the worst show that you've ever been to?

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Speaker 3: Yes, I can, right off the top of my head.

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Speaker 3: It was a New Year's Eve. I was in borron

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Speaker 3: By Falls Festival.

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Speaker 4: It had rained all night and then at noon, i'd say,

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Speaker 4: the heat started coming in hot, and we were still

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Speaker 4: in the tent. So it's basically like a sauna. So

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Speaker 4: none of the drunk kids who likes to sit on

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Speaker 4: the grass, because that's another thing you don't think about

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Speaker 4: music festivals.

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Speaker 3: There's no cheese. You're sitting on the grass like an animal.

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Speaker 4: And then they were all just sitting on the outskirts

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Speaker 4: of the tent while I was in there doing basically

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Speaker 4: bickerm comedy.

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Speaker 1: To them, Oh my god comedy.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, so hot, so hot, Yeah, it was about fifty

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Speaker 4: five degrees. I lost about iklos nearing a twenty minute seat. Man.

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Speaker 2: I tried big from yoga one and only once. It

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Speaker 2: was so horrible because it was so hot and so sweaty,

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Speaker 2: and because I wasn't sort of like the other yogis

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Speaker 2: in there and carried a few extra kilos. The instructor,

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Speaker 2: if that's what you call them, said every time they

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Speaker 2: did a new move, she would look at me and say,

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Speaker 2: you probably won't be able to.

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Speaker 1: Do this one. Oh, you won't be able to do

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Speaker 1: this one.

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Speaker 4: It just sounds like a whole show full of people

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Speaker 4: who make bad decisions.

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Speaker 5: It is a little bit, that's what it is. One

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Speaker 5: of the things I love that you do is ask

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Speaker 5: your fans for questions, because you say it provides you

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Speaker 5: with content. What is the dumbest one, though, that you've

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Speaker 5: come across, Because I did read one where someone asked

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Speaker 5: you if you're excited when you and your wife got pregnant?

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Speaker 1: Is that true?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that was actually her sister. I'm not even kidding.

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Speaker 4: When we find this essent she lives in Brisbane, shout

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Speaker 4: out to anyone from Brisbane and we're going to have

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Speaker 4: a baby, and she goes, oh was it.

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Speaker 3: A planned pregnancy? And honestly I could not hit.

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Speaker 4: But my hand hard enough At this point I was like, no,

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Speaker 4: the dildo exploded.

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Speaker 3: They're expecting couple with But yeah, no. I love when

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Speaker 3: people ask me questions or talk to me. I'm like

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Speaker 3: all of this.

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Speaker 4: Is going to be on a shower one day when

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Speaker 4: people go, don't use this in the show.

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Speaker 3: I'm not using all of this. I'm not discreet at all.

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Speaker 4: What about your family, though?

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Speaker 3: How do they feel about that?

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Speaker 5: Because sometimes I have to say when we tell stories,

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Speaker 5: spends his life apologizing to the people he names and

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Speaker 5: shames on it.

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Speaker 4: I do, I see, but I don't because I don't

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Speaker 4: really like I'll talk about my kids, but I never

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Speaker 4: name them, and.

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Speaker 3: I don't really say which wondered what all?

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Speaker 4: I just go because my kids and so I sort

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Speaker 4: of just skim up top of them, like I mean

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Speaker 4: my wife, of course, that's a different story. She's probably

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Speaker 4: gonna take a baseball back in me one day. But

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Speaker 4: but I'm actually pretty fast, Like I don't look it,

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Speaker 4: but I'm.

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Speaker 2: Pretty night work you mate, who works at over with us?

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Speaker 1: And we loving the piece of sampagne?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean he stepped up a little bit on

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Speaker 2: have you been paying attention? But he's always a bit

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Speaker 2: of a weight to carry, isn't he.

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Speaker 4: Mate. I feel like he's downloaded an app that gives

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Speaker 4: him some notifications on the news.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, no, he's he's not.

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Speaker 4: I think his biggest downfall is he picks his own wardrobe.

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Speaker 3: People don't know that, like the rest of the me.

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Speaker 4: He picks his own shirt a size too small so

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Speaker 4: he can show his guns, you know, and his one

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Speaker 4: chest seat because he's just got one on the left side.

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Speaker 1: One chest hair.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, just the one, just the one. He really like.

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Speaker 4: His biggest dream is is like if you're ask him

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Speaker 4: what's your five year what's your ten year plan? He's

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Speaker 4: like to grow a few chest seas.

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Speaker 3: Wear chain that he got his father save a few

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Speaker 3: years ago.

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Speaker 4: But this never going to happen, Like, I've got more

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Speaker 4: chest hairs than he does.

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Speaker 2: Well, let's not bring up an awkward moment on this show, says,

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Speaker 2: but you were wearing you were wearing a low cut

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Speaker 2: top one time and there was a hair on your

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Speaker 2: chest and I thought it was something that had fallen

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Speaker 2: from my chest to your chest.

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Speaker 5: It was sort of the size and thickness of like

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Speaker 5: a labrador dog hair.

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Speaker 3: Years it was cracking.

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Speaker 2: I got that to remove it off, and I just

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Speaker 2: assumed it would come with me and it was attached.

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Speaker 3: I feel random hair hr person, or at least.

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Speaker 4: Like like I don't know a Cara on your show

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Speaker 4: at all times to stop it from making bad decisions

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Speaker 4: and pulling his off colleagues. Chief.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I think that's why Millie left, because she

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Speaker 2: had a skin tag that I pulled up her neck

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Speaker 2: and it bled heavily.

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Speaker 1: That was another issue that we fell into here.

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Speaker 4: Gosh, what you know what your problem is? Your eyes

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Speaker 4: are too good?

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Speaker 1: That's it.

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Speaker 3: My eyes are so bad. I can't see anything after

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Speaker 3: a full mastache. I look like Tom Sellergover.

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Speaker 5: Is that your weirdest body hair moment? Thelp lip? Because

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Speaker 5: Whipper gives me hell every day and says to me,

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Speaker 5: when are you going to shave your upper lip?

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Speaker 2: No, Sarah's ready for November already. She's raising money. She's

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Speaker 2: going to make a fortune. Yeah.

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Speaker 4: I mean we're here for the boys, you know, doing

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Speaker 4: it for the boys.

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Speaker 3: Wind, I just want to twil You know. You don't know.

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Speaker 3: This is how you know when your eyesight's going.

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Speaker 4: When you go to get your eyebrows threadd and the

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Speaker 4: lady goes and would you like me to do your

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Speaker 4: You're like, what did? Because you don't know it's there?

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Speaker 3: They're like, it's there.

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Speaker 2: A friend of mine, she said, the difference between being

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Speaker 2: like when you were at twenty first parties, you'd go

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Speaker 2: into the toilets and everyone was touching up their makeup.

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Speaker 2: Now when you turn up to a fortieth, all the

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Speaker 2: women are in the bathroom and they've got tweezers out

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Speaker 2: of their bag, and then there might be a hair

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Speaker 2: on their chin.

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Speaker 1: Stupid.

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Speaker 4: Can I just say how unprepared these women are of

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Speaker 4: you keep a tweezer in your cuby hole and the

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Speaker 4: car so that because that's where the best light is

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Speaker 4: and the most mirrors. Every time I look in the

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Speaker 4: rim mirror, oh my gosh, this is hairy.

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Speaker 3: And where the tweezes out of the lights? Back in

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Speaker 3: the day used to put mascara on it. The lights.

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Speaker 1: And do you know what you do? See that? A

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Speaker 1: lot women plucking hair from their chin and just looking up.

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Speaker 1: It is the light.

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Speaker 2: It's isn't it?

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Speaker 1: That gives you a chance to see something you couldn't

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Speaker 1: see earlier? Says you should stop looking out, you should do.

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Speaker 2: More grooming in the car. See Ursula. I was one

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Speaker 2: of those kids that grew so quickly. I was a

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Speaker 2: beast growing up like I had pubes in grade four

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Speaker 2: and then.

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Speaker 3: It's welcome.

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Speaker 2: And then in year nine, we were going on a

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Speaker 2: school trip and one of the parents came up to

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Speaker 2: me and.

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Speaker 1: Said, what year do you teach. I'm one of the kids.

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Speaker 1: I'm just one of the kids.

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Speaker 4: All like a picture now was early pubes and at

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Speaker 4: a young age is a very hairy butt crack.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Well, there was a photo taken here in the office,

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Speaker 2: and you're right, that's why we need that safety officer back.

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Speaker 2: There was a photo taken last week with my pants down.

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Speaker 4: Look at us.

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Speaker 5: You're looking at the door as though she's got a race.

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Speaker 3: I need to I need to leave like I feel

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Speaker 3: like I need.

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Speaker 1: Ursula Carlson. We love you.

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Speaker 2: Thank you for coming on the show Channel ten tonight.

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Speaker 2: Have you been paying attention eight forty don't miss it.

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Speaker 2: Great to see your face.

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Speaker 3: Thanks to the Fincy and Whipper podcast