WEBVTT - Rhi Just Said Something Every Fan Needs To Hear...

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<v Speaker 1>Hello, and welcome back to the Math twenty podcast with

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<v Speaker 1>Me Joshua Fox, and today's little episode Guys is based

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<v Speaker 1>off something Re said yesterday on Koreina's podcast This is Chaos,

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<v Speaker 1>and she touched on something that is actually a big

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<v Speaker 1>topic and it's randomly something I've been thinking about a

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<v Speaker 1>lot lately. And and before I play the grabs and

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<v Speaker 1>get into it, let me just set this up a

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<v Speaker 1>little bit. So since married at first I ended, everybody

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<v Speaker 1>obviously wants to know like what's next for the cast,

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<v Speaker 1>and as RhE and Jeff are the only lasting match,

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<v Speaker 1>the natural next announcement from them as a happy couple

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<v Speaker 1>now living together would either be a real engagement or

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<v Speaker 1>a pregnancy. Now. Firstly, on the idea of Re and

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<v Speaker 1>Jeff getting married for real, I wouldn't really hold out

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<v Speaker 1>for that, as Re said this on Karina's podcast, because.

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<v Speaker 2>You guys did get married on a reality show. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>what's your take on proper marriage? Like are you interested

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<v Speaker 2>in getting married or just.

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<v Speaker 3>You know what's really funny? I always said prior to

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<v Speaker 3>the show, marriage for me has never been something like

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<v Speaker 3>when women talk about I've always imagined my wedding to

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<v Speaker 3>be like this my dress to be like this, I

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<v Speaker 3>want to have this big wedding for me. I was

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<v Speaker 3>just like, I just want to find my person that

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<v Speaker 3>I have not a doubt in my mind about, and

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<v Speaker 3>that was my biggest concern. I think marriage for me,

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<v Speaker 3>it's really not a necessity. If my partner said, like,

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<v Speaker 3>I really want to get married one hundred percent, but

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<v Speaker 3>if I didn't get married, it wouldn't affect me, if

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<v Speaker 3>that makes sense, as much as a relationship is something

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<v Speaker 3>to be celebrated for, and people can celebrate that however

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<v Speaker 3>they like. But you know, if Jeff did turn around

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<v Speaker 3>and ask me to marry.

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<v Speaker 1>Him, I wouldn't say no.

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<v Speaker 2>So exciting. Look again, it's completely did you hear that? Jeff, Jeff?

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<v Speaker 2>Jeff Jeff.

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<v Speaker 1>And then, on the topic of any potential pregnancy or

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<v Speaker 1>future little Muff's baby, reactually then said something that I

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<v Speaker 1>think a lot of people should take notes of. In

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<v Speaker 1>recent weeks, a lot of people have randomly started speculating

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<v Speaker 1>and commenting now and again like, oh, is she pregnant?

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<v Speaker 1>I think she's pregnant, because you know, they might see

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<v Speaker 1>a picture where a certain angle or lighting may look like, oh,

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<v Speaker 1>is that a tiny bump? And then people get excited,

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<v Speaker 1>people ask people message her, and then alongside that, in

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<v Speaker 1>any press interview that Re or Jeff, now do they're

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<v Speaker 1>obviously asked about this, you know, their first ask, well,

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<v Speaker 1>are you pregnant? Really? We've seen comments and speculation, and

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<v Speaker 1>then when she says no, she's then asked, well do

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<v Speaker 1>you want children? Are you already trying? Have you picked

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<v Speaker 1>out names? How many do you want? You know, journalists

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<v Speaker 1>just want a headline. And if we answered a question going, oh,

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<v Speaker 1>we'd love twins and we've already chose the names. I

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<v Speaker 1>know that how the media works, you know, on the

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<v Speaker 1>front cover of that magazine, the next week would be

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<v Speaker 1>Rie and Jeff's announcement we're having twins. And obviously they're

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<v Speaker 1>not having twins. They've said maybe day, you know, that

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<v Speaker 1>would be the dream. Anyway, Sorry, I'm getting a little

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<v Speaker 1>sidetrack there. So yeah, here is retouching on this whole topic.

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<v Speaker 3>To Karina, yes, I'm not pregnant, although every article says

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<v Speaker 3>I am. And I think the weight game contributed to

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<v Speaker 3>the pregnancy comments. And then I saw a few comments

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<v Speaker 3>about me putting on weight, which is like, you know,

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<v Speaker 3>it just sucks that women have to explain their body

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<v Speaker 3>changes all the time.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, like men don't.

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<v Speaker 3>I swear men don't have to do that as much

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<v Speaker 3>as we do.

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<v Speaker 2>No shit, it's like, sorry, our hormones are always up here.

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<v Speaker 1>Like get our periods.

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<v Speaker 2>You try being a man and getting a period.

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<v Speaker 3>For when you have your period, you do look three

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<v Speaker 3>months pregnant for a couple of days there, but I

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<v Speaker 3>think you look. I was really honest with That's why

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<v Speaker 3>I was honest with putting on weight and why I

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<v Speaker 3>was starting a challenge, and because of the comments that

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<v Speaker 3>I was getting. But Jeff and I definitely want to

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<v Speaker 3>have kids at some stage. I think right now, it's

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<v Speaker 3>just we do want to just focus on, you know,

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<v Speaker 3>creating our home, like we've recently moved in together and

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<v Speaker 3>enjoying each other's company outside the experiment and we're both

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<v Speaker 3>doing our own thing. And as much as you know,

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<v Speaker 3>I am thirty five, I've got into metriosis. I was

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<v Speaker 3>told at twenty five I'll probably have trouble having children.

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<v Speaker 3>And they actually told me when I had surgery when

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<v Speaker 3>I was twenty five, I should have kids that year,

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<v Speaker 3>and I was like, I'm single.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh god, I just got goose bumps.

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<v Speaker 3>I know, so it'll be it'll be an interesting journey

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<v Speaker 3>I think when we do try and start having kids,

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<v Speaker 3>and it's definitely on the cards, but just not right

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<v Speaker 3>at this.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and no pressure and don't let society pressure you

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<v Speaker 2>in those ways.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>I think it's just keep doing what you guys are

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<v Speaker 2>doing now.

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<v Speaker 1>To me, res response that is important for two main reasons.

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<v Speaker 1>And the first one is why do we actually think

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<v Speaker 1>it is okay to comment on somebody's body and speculate,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, even if they're famous. You know, I think

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<v Speaker 1>often it's like, well, during the public eye, it's okay,

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<v Speaker 1>But actually is it okay? Would you want someone speculating

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<v Speaker 1>and your body if maybe you were a bit bloated

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<v Speaker 1>or you put a little bit away, and would you

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<v Speaker 1>want someone to go are you pregnant? Probably wouldn't. And

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<v Speaker 1>also in that response, rementioned how she suffers with endo.

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<v Speaker 1>She had surgery when she was twenty five and she

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<v Speaker 1>was told then, which that was I think ten years

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<v Speaker 1>ago now that she should probably have a baby that

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<v Speaker 1>year or she may have difficulty when she's ready to

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<v Speaker 1>eventually try. And you know, now knowing this, people speculating

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<v Speaker 1>and asking Rie about you know, are you pregnant, Are

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<v Speaker 1>you having a baby? It feels kind of like insensitive

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<v Speaker 1>and inappropriate, and obviously no one knew the background context there.

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<v Speaker 1>But I suppose the point I'm getting to here is

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<v Speaker 1>do we even need to know the background? Do we

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<v Speaker 1>need to know the backstory? Like or should we as

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<v Speaker 1>a society? And you know, fans of the show and

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<v Speaker 1>these people just make baby plans and pregnancy and all

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<v Speaker 1>of that just a no go topic unless the person

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<v Speaker 1>themselves brings it up. And don't get me wrong, I

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<v Speaker 1>know that there is really bad intent from people, and

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<v Speaker 1>people are just excited and with Rie and Jeff, the

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<v Speaker 1>idea of them starting a family one day is exciting

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<v Speaker 1>as we were all kind of on that journey watching

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<v Speaker 1>them fall in love. But I don't know. This is

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<v Speaker 1>just something I was thinking about this morning. And it's

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<v Speaker 1>funny actually, because for my actual day job, I work

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<v Speaker 1>on other podcasts and produce things and like various projects. Anyway,

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<v Speaker 1>one thing I work on is a podcast called Her

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<v Speaker 1>Best Life, which is with Jackie Out who I worked

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<v Speaker 1>with for the last couple of years on the radio

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<v Speaker 1>show as part of the team there. And then it's

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<v Speaker 1>Jackie and her best friend Gemma and a question they

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<v Speaker 1>answered in a recent episode was does Jackie ever feel

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<v Speaker 1>guilt or regret for only ever having one child? And

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<v Speaker 1>as Jackie answered that, they both then kind of discussed

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<v Speaker 1>how often in life, women who don't even want children

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<v Speaker 1>sometimes feel pressured into it because of these constant questions

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<v Speaker 1>and assumptions and yeah, I don't know. Take a listen.

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<v Speaker 4>Do I ever regret or feel guilty about only having

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<v Speaker 4>one child?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 4>You obviously have to and would like more. Yeah, And

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<v Speaker 4>for me the answer is no, I actually don't. Like

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<v Speaker 4>if I had have had another one, it would have

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<v Speaker 4>been out of obligational guilt.

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<v Speaker 5>I think some women don't want children at all, and

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<v Speaker 5>that's fine as well. Like I feel like whatever works

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<v Speaker 5>for you as a woman, don't let society or pressure

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<v Speaker 5>or your partner or anything it dictates you should.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, and I think you will know in your heart

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<v Speaker 4>of hearts, You'll know, your gut feeling will tell you.

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<v Speaker 4>Yone always said I was going to be fine with one.

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<v Speaker 1>Hearing Jackie and Jemma have that conversation recently and then

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<v Speaker 1>listening to re on that podcast yesterday and even how

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<v Speaker 1>I think it was last week Jamie had to do

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<v Speaker 1>our post saying no, she's not pregnant, you know, because

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<v Speaker 1>of one single picture made it look like she had

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<v Speaker 1>the slightest bump. And then I just started thinking on

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<v Speaker 1>the drive to work this morning, like how much is

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<v Speaker 1>the media to blame for maybe normalizing this type of

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<v Speaker 1>questioning and comments, specifically, you know when it comes to celebrities,

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<v Speaker 1>people of shows, you know, the Rees, the Jamies, the Jackie's,

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<v Speaker 1>and you know, people we think we know, actually we don't.

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<v Speaker 1>And then I fought back to me age twenty one,

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<v Speaker 1>when I left my hometown, I was offered my first

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<v Speaker 1>ever job in the media as an intern for a

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<v Speaker 1>weekly celebrity magazine in London, and one of the first

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<v Speaker 1>things I was taught there is going into any interview.

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<v Speaker 1>I then started doing weekly with many celebrities, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>going into any one of those with a female celebrity,

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<v Speaker 1>I had to always ask the free bees, which is boys,

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<v Speaker 1>body and babies. And that is because, you know, the

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<v Speaker 1>editors of those magazines who were teaching me, because I

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<v Speaker 1>never studied journalism, like I learned on the job, so

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<v Speaker 1>I just listened and did as I was told. But

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<v Speaker 1>like those editors drilled into us how those free topics

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<v Speaker 1>would essentially sell on the cover. So you know, with boys,

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<v Speaker 1>are they dating? If not, why are you not dating?

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<v Speaker 1>If you are dating, you know, tell me every And

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<v Speaker 1>then with body you'd have to be like, oh, are

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<v Speaker 1>you happy with how you look at them? Innute? You know,

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<v Speaker 1>are you on a diet? Are you following any plans?

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<v Speaker 1>You have any goals to lose weight? Or like, are

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<v Speaker 1>you planning any cosmetic procedures? Boatoxx boo jobs like anything.

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<v Speaker 1>We just had to ask everything about bodies, and like

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<v Speaker 1>I look back on now and I touched on this

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<v Speaker 1>in my book, and I know that was mostly because

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<v Speaker 1>the editors would hope they would maybe mention some brief

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<v Speaker 1>insecurity or something that we could essentially then highlight as

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<v Speaker 1>a magazine and pretending it was, you know, to normalize them.

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<v Speaker 1>It wasn't. It was essentially just to kind of exploit

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<v Speaker 1>that insecurity and make people judge them for it, which

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<v Speaker 1>you know, I mean, I do talk about that in

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<v Speaker 1>my book, and I don't feel great looking back at it.

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<v Speaker 1>But then yeah, the last beat babies. When I'd go

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<v Speaker 1>into those interviews, you know, I'd have to ask, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>if they're dating someone, oh, are you planning babies, to

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<v Speaker 1>want babies together, and if they weren't with someone at

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<v Speaker 1>that time, I'd to ask, you know, would you like

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<v Speaker 1>to be a single parent, would you go down that

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<v Speaker 1>route of IVF or like are they at a certain

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<v Speaker 1>age and have to be like, oh, if you thought

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<v Speaker 1>about freezing your eggs? And you know, if they already

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<v Speaker 1>had a baby, you want another one? And actually it's

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<v Speaker 1>funny thinking back, because I was twenty one, I didn't

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<v Speaker 1>even know half these things meant. I'd get told like,

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<v Speaker 1>ask if they thought about freezing their eggs. I didn't

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<v Speaker 1>even know what that meant at the time. Sorry, again

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<v Speaker 1>getting sidetracked. And as I said, I touched on this

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<v Speaker 1>in my book while reflecting on my career, but I

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<v Speaker 1>didn't realize back then how every question I was being

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<v Speaker 1>told to ask was essentially reducing every woman in the

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<v Speaker 1>world to free topics because a bunch of other women

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<v Speaker 1>in a boardroom said, Hey, this is apparently the only

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<v Speaker 1>thing that all women want to read about and will

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<v Speaker 1>buy a magazine if it's mentioned on the cover. And

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<v Speaker 1>I suppose for a while now the last few years,

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<v Speaker 1>I thought like, thank god, we have all moved on

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<v Speaker 1>from that, and that mentality, but just this baby stuff lately,

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<v Speaker 1>I thought, well, actually, maybe we haven't, And then also

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<v Speaker 1>thinking like, you know those magazines, which is not as

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<v Speaker 1>many around it anymore, but for years, like every week

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<v Speaker 1>on the shelves, you know, in the supermarket by the tills,

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<v Speaker 1>week after week, every headline being centered around babies and pregnancies.

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<v Speaker 1>I suppose like essentially that normalized this type of questioning

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<v Speaker 1>in a stuff in a way that I suppose is

0:11:22.000 --> 0:11:25.600
<v Speaker 1>now continuing, just not via magazine covers, but via the

0:11:25.600 --> 0:11:28.800
<v Speaker 1>consumers of those on social media when they do go,

0:11:28.880 --> 0:11:30.920
<v Speaker 1>oh my god, are you pregnant because there might be

0:11:31.040 --> 0:11:34.240
<v Speaker 1>a slight bumb or whatever in a picture, and yeah,

0:11:34.559 --> 0:11:37.880
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. Just a few thoughts this morning from me,

0:11:38.640 --> 0:11:43.679
<v Speaker 1>a man who can never fully relate to this topic. Actually,

0:11:43.760 --> 0:11:46.000
<v Speaker 1>is this what man'splaining is? If I just said something

0:11:46.040 --> 0:11:49.280
<v Speaker 1>that never needed explaining. If so, please don't cancel me,

0:11:49.320 --> 0:11:52.680
<v Speaker 1>because I promise my intentions are good here. It's just

0:11:52.920 --> 0:11:56.440
<v Speaker 1>genuinely something I've been thinking about after hearing Jackie speak

0:11:56.480 --> 0:11:59.120
<v Speaker 1>about it, and then re and just seeing how you know,

0:11:59.200 --> 0:12:01.400
<v Speaker 1>every year when they're is a celebrity someone in maths,

0:12:01.679 --> 0:12:03.280
<v Speaker 1>where do you go are you pregnant, Are you pregnant?

0:12:03.280 --> 0:12:06.280
<v Speaker 1>Are you pregnant? Constantly? Are when you're having babies? And

0:12:06.320 --> 0:12:09.520
<v Speaker 1>maybe we all need to collectively move away from that

0:12:10.040 --> 0:12:11.680
<v Speaker 1>for now though. That is all I've got for you.

0:12:12.000 --> 0:12:13.040
<v Speaker 1>Have a lovely day.